please welcome ryan seacrest. [ cheers and applause ] >> i'm exhausted. >> it's been a day. >> jimmy: it's always a day for you. thank you for stopping by. i did the math. by coming here, even staying for nine minutes, you are losing $28,000 in revenue, so, we appreciate it. i owe you. >> my pleasure. >> jimmy: how is everything? >> good, man. good to be here. i didn't realize steven tyler was so provocative until i saw that clip earlier. >> jimmy: oh, yeah, he is. >> it goes right over our heads on the show. >> jimmy: you say that, but i wonder if they're reacting to this, the producers of the show and go, you know what, he looks a little bit too much like a pervert. maybe we should reel this in a little bit. >> i think they're saying he looks like that, let's make it a two-hour episode. >> jimmy: or are they going to go with it? because -- i hope they go with it, because i think it's going to get -- it's going to be great when it's live. >> by the way, i'm like licking my chops. >> jimmy: he's going to be licking yours, too. i mean, he's -- >> wouldn't

can you imagine ryan seacrest proposing? he's like, "honey, there's something i've wanted to ask you for awhile now. i'm gonna ask you right -- after the break. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] i just read this. face founder mark zuckerberg is apparently renting a new five-bedroom house. it's a nice house except, as soon as you get used to the furniture, he rearranges it for no reason. [ laughter ] this is just insane. a jetblue pilot apparently lost a bag with his gun inside. i don't know if i'm more worried that the bag had a gun in it or that the airlines are now losing their own luggage. i don't what's -- [ laughter ] check this out, a pair of twin sisters in california will celebrate their 100th birthday tomorrow. >> steve: wow. >> jimmy: that's right. it's so cute, right? [ cheers and applause ] it's so cute. they know each other so well, they practically forget each other's sentences. [ light laughter ] it's so cute. did you see there's a man in south carolina who was forced to remove a snowman's genitals after hi

. >> reporter: we talked to host ryan seacrest about the new judges. >> hey, guys.y uncomfortable, the ego and the end tour age alone just makes it very difficult to handle. >> reporter: yours or theirs? >> mine. >> reporter: in line on this cold day 16-year-old gabby walter clay a san francisco native. >> i am really anxious. i wouldn't say nervous. i am really excited. >> reporter: 16-year-old kyle thompson from stockton was just a few feet away. >> it wasn't what i was expected not showing on t.v. >> reporter: we also met up with marsalis pleasant. he is homeless and tried out before. he has never made it to hollywood. >> i am giving 100% marsalis and that's all i can give. >> reporter: picture are snapped and interviews conducted and while ryan seacrest greets the hopefuls one by one. >> you are a rock and roll guy. i wouldn't suggest rock and roll. >> reporter: first up was marsalis. >> it was not to be for marsalis pleasant. kyle was confident. but his family could barely stand the wait. >> it was just almost too much to bare. >> i was just scared inside. oh,

. >> reporter: we talked to host ryan seacrest about the new judges. >> hey, guys.comfortable, the ego and the end tour age alone just makes it very difficult to handle. >> reporter: yours or theirs? >> mine. >> reporter: in line on this cold day 16-year-old gabby walter clay a san francisco native. >> i am really anxious. i wouldn't say nervous. i am really excited. >> reporter: 16-year-old kyle thompson from stockton was just a few feet away. >> it wasn't what i was expected not showing on t.v. >> reporter: we also met up with marsalis pleasant. he is homeless and tried out before. he has never made it to hollywood. >> i am giving 100% marsalis and that's all i can give. >> reporter: picture are snapped and interviews conducted and while ryan seacrest greets the hopefuls one by one. >> you are a rock and roll guy. i wouldn't suggest rock and roll. >> reporter: first up was marsalis. >> it was not to be for marsalis pleasant. kyle was confident. but his family could barely stand the wait. >> it was just almost too much to bare. >> i was just scared inside. oh, my g

. >> ryan seacrest? >> jimmy: not ryan seacrest, no. rhymes with boscar.of the contest is name that oscar winner. what is a word that rhymes with boscar? >> oh, the english guy, the guy -- bruce willis. is the father for ashton kutcher? >> jimmy: that's absolutely right, yehya, bruce willis. that's bruce willis. well done, fellas. congratulations, yehya, you're our winner, you win the unbreakable perform. wow. [ applause ] all right. one more thing, it's time for our weekly tribute to the fcc where we bleep and blur things whether they need it or not. it's "this week in unnecessary censorship." >> describe the roseanne you know. >> first of all, i like to get one thing straight, she's a [ bleep ] sex machine. >> she retired with 17 records. even as he missed a season in his prime to [ bleep ] [ bleep ] in the navy. >> this i'm not staying for. no. this is not okay. >> why is charlie sheen giving advice about [ bleep ] [ bleep ] socially? >> johnny depp [ bleep ] me and then he begged for me. >> you have some pretty intense love scenes. >> it ends by me bei

. >>> and, finally, proving she is the master of self-promotion lady gaga told ryan seacrest prior tor memorable egg appearance at theç grammys, sh spent 72 hours in the egg calling it a "very creative experience" saying her motive was to be born on stage. as if the egg was not strange enough. >> and sitting many it for -- someone had to install the lights in there to make it look good. >> we're total suckers for believing that's actually the case. >> lynn, are you assuming that somebody would try to, like, lie to glorify their name? >> maybe i'm just being cynical, bill. >> you? >> never. >>> and this comes to us from new york city's madison square garden where a dog with some southern charm took home the canine world's most coveted crown. it was a first in the 135-year history of the westminster kennel club dog show that a scottish deer hound took home the best in show award. hickory beat out more than 2,600 other dogs for top prize, but she won't be doing any encores. hickory is retiring. a fitting end for a virginia farm dog that made good in the big city. i'm lynn berry, and thi

. >> ryan seacrest called this an emotional time bomb.he broke down in tears after forgetting the lyrics twice. the judges saw something they liked. they sent her to the next round along with 49 others. >> there are two performances that just stand out. >> the night started with 100 contestants divided into four rooms. two sets of 25 were given the bad news. you can keep track of how they are doing right here on ktvu channel 2 wednesdays and thursdays at 8:00 p.m.. >>> people want something done to make highway 4 safer. this is video of a deadly accident in october between loan lone tree way and sand creek road. some want to see passing lanes eliminated and a concrete barrier installed. >>> we hope everyone is safe on the roads right now. let's check with sal. >> all right right now traffic is moving along realtively well this morning if you are driving on the 280 interchange that traffic looks good getting up to the 880 commute. no major problems there. if you are getting to the south bay let's say you are come into pleasanton the traffi

. >> dubbed an emotional time bomb by host ryan seacrest she broke down in tears after forgetting theyric twice. the judges saw something they liked and sent her to the next round along with 49 others. >> i have seen performances like i have never seen in my life. >> i can think of two of them. >> yeah me too that just stand out. >> the night began with 100 contestants that divided into four rooms. two sets of 25 were given the bad news. you can keep track of their promise right here on wednesday and thursdays at 8:00 p.m.. >>> we'll keep track of them which we will. sal is keeping track of your commute. >> traffic is getting busier but nothing like we have seen in the last few days. the bay bridge is light coming up on mornings on 2 we will be following this of course. let's go to steve. >>> sal, thank you. i would not be surprised we are getting very low snow levels and east foothills of san jose. there is a little bit of light there. that is starting to light up too. we are not done yet. most of it is to the south and east bay. we'll talk about it coming up on mornings on two. >>>

con, especially in ryan seacrest's hair. [ laughter ] he's looking good.ars, viewers were able to submit auditions online using myspace. con, for the first time in ten years, people use myspace. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] i like myspace. why not? you sit around the house, tall glass of buttermilk on myspace. >> steve: i do on myspace, listening to charleston music. ♪ [ laughter ] ♪ 23 sca-doo "turn up the radio, maud. i'm going to use myspace." [ laughter ] >> jimmy: "now, you put your bloomers on." >> steve: "i forgot my password. wait a second." nod, nod, nod." >> jimmy: oh, my gosh. "esther387." [ laughter ] ♪ >> steve: "maude!" >> jimmy: "oh, my gosh, i'm at earthlink. [ laughter ] i got to check out my geocities account." [ laughter ] >> steve: "hold on." ♪ >> jimmy: "let me crank up the computer. [ laughter ] there you go." >> steve: "it needs more fluid. it needs more fluid." [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: "it's a model t." >> steve: "oh, wait, i need a new cube. [ laughter ] i'm good." >> jimmy: here we go. pro, "idol" is taping right

seem -- well, you can't rush a possum, you know, that's -- she's dragging this out longer than ryan seacrestshe's going to lift a leg and pee -- oh, and she picked none of them. we'll come back to heidi in a little bit, then, i guess. when she gets near the statues, just break in, all right? by the way, after the academy awards, i hope you'll remain awake for our sixth annual "jimmy kimmel live" after the academy awards special. [ applause ] you haven't even seen it yet, but i appreciate it. tom hanks will be here. music from ceelo green and a big video project. it's important you watch while it's happening. that way when your friends e-mail it to you the next day, you go, yeah, i know, i saw it. rush limbaugh yesterday had some unkind words for the obamas. i know, i couldn't believe it, either. on his show, he criticized michelle obama for eating ribs for dinner while in vacation in colorado. he said mrs. obama is a hypocrite because she promotes healthy eating and ate ribs, which, well, isn't that the morbidly obese pot calling the keting african-american? he said she doesn't look like she

it combined the suspense of ryan seacrest with dick clark.may have been the highlight of the show. colin firth won best act internally portman, best actress. and nicole kidman was upset. hard to tell through the botox. and christian bale in the speech forget his wife's name. he got choked up and emotional because someone moved a light. this is a -- 83rd oscar. this is my favorite oscars after the wieners. they are. and then after tonight, it's back to green lighting big ma mo ma's house. james franco and anne hathaway did a nice job hosting the show. [ cheers and applause ] this is the first time a man and a woman have hosted the oscar together on stage. once again the hollywood liberals trying to force their heterosexual agenda down our throats. james franco hosted and nominated for "127 hours," a true story of when charlie sheen got stuck under a huge rock of cocaine. now the big winner "the king's speech." and because it was a huge success, they are working on adapting it to appeal to american aud ynsienceaudience. the trailer was released

tomorrow night, we will begin our ninth year of broadcasting with ryan seacrest, from "the fighter,"sa leo and music from cage the elephant, so, set your vcrs, if you have one of those. during her seven seasons on "saturday night live," our first guest impersonated a wide range of powerful women from hillary clinton to kim jong-il. you can see her now on the very funny show "parks & recreation" thursday nights at 9:30 on nbc. please say hello to amy poehler. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: well, i can think of no more delightful guest to have here on our anniversary. >> happy anniversary, by the way. congratulations. it's amazing. >> jimmy: thank you. [ cheers and applause ] i know it is. i don't know if that's good, but yeah. >> i'm really surprised. >> jimmy: really, this is shocking. >> i did some research. i know you were talking about bronze is the, like, traditional gift. and then the modern anniversary, eighth anniversary gift is an appliance. >> jimmy: oh, really? >> and the place you're supposed to travel to on your eighth anniversary is a casino. >> jimmy: really? >> so i

eva longoria, ryan seacrest and joe mchail to name a few. the website received more than 25 million hits already and more than so,000 bids have already been submitted. they range from hundreds to over $is,00 $1,000. the proceeds to go for homes in haiti. >> they have kids that are literally living in the restrooms of the facility and -- because all the space they have and people bring their kids and drop them off and so we're building what will be the largest home and school for severely disabled children in all of haiti. >> king says the project will cost about $1 million. he doesn't expect the celebrity twitter auction to cover all of the costs but says it's a start. >> hopefully, people that see this is a church and a pastor that are leading the effort, that it will show them something different. that churches can bring about great good in the world. >> it can. you can see more of the history makers tomorrow morning on "the today show" after today on the bay at 4:30 or check it out zbloours what a great idea. >>> ahead at 6:00, the chaos

the bay area well culled ryan seacrest and all of the "idol" judges.ot of people used gimmicks and costumes trying to stand out and they did. and others were trying to get that golden ticket just by their voice aun loan -- voice alone. the fan favorite adam lambert. and to celebrate, usf will host a viewing party at the lounge on the fourth floor at 8:00. you can watch all of the "idol" auditions tonight, right here at 8:00. make sure you stay tuned after the show. the 10:00 news will take you behind the scenes to see how the san francisco audience auditions for the "idol" hopefuls really happened. >>> nine minutes of about -- nine minutes before 9:00. some important news for children of young children. it involves possible danger. >>> we're following traffic problems this morning. stay tuned. >>> in about an hour and a half, demolition work gets underway at presidio school in san francisco. crews are making way for a new expanded facility at the same site on 10th street. presidio is a mandarin preschool. the new school is expected to open on may 1st.