oh, music from sam smith is on the way.voice of ironman's head. starting friday see him in the sci-fi thrill er transcendence. >> he did it six months age instead of creating artificial intelligence he duplicated an existing one. he recorded the monkey's brain activity and uploaded its consciousness like a song. his body is dying. the mind is a pattern of electrical signals we can upload. >> he is a monkey. >> jimmy: transcendence opens a week from friday. please welcome paul bettany. >> jimmy: good to see you. >> lovely to see you. >> jimmy: everything all right with you. >> little anxious. because nothing funny has happened to men the two years since i last saw you. well, actually, no, one thing happened -- the other day my friend rung me up. he had been in the restaurant with his 9-year-old daughter. she had just called the waiter a douche bag. and he had asked her, where, where did you learn such a word as douche bag. she said, oh, uncle paul. >> jimmy: really. >> he said, well, in what context, did he call -- who did h

sam smith and naughty boy putting on a show.h on you and sticks to you. >> has what? >> tar pitch. >> sticks to you. >> pine tar. >> i was trying to give you a way out of that. >> tar pitch. >> pine tar. >> it's also called pitch. >> it was intended as a smooth segue. >> but instead, not so much. >> it didn't go over the plate, al. >> thank you. >> pass ball. so yesterday we told you about michael pineda ejected from a game against the red sox for having pine tar, not just anywhere, but smeared across his neck. >> very visible. >> he would go up to touch it. put it on his hand and throw the baseball. he said it was because the weather was so cold at fenway that he had to grip the ball. unfortunately, you're just simply not allowed to have what they call foreign substances. so he's been suspended ten games. will miss one, maybe two starts depending on how the rotation turns out. >> set up a lot of debate on sports radio yesterday. a lot of players have come out and said that they use pine tar, that it's widely used, it's well-kno

and each of the 40 puts on the internet a little sign that says, sam smith pac. this money goes to people like sam smith. great people. now, we can give each of those 40 $5,000. they aren't coordinated, they're not established by a single person. each is independently run. and we know pretty well that that total of $5,000 times 40 will go to sam smith. okay? what does that violate? >> well, there's a couple problems with that hypothetical, your honor. first of all, there are base limits both on what can be given to a pac -- >> $5,000. >> and on what a pac can give to a candidate. >> $5,000. so we all we have is my $5,000 going to the pac and there happened to be 400 pacs. so 5,000 times -- 4,000. five times 40, five times 400, how much is that? i'm not too good at math. [laughter] >> without doing the math, i will tell you that earmarking and proliferation restrictions -- >> no, no. there is no earmarking -- >> but -- but there's -- >> because earmarking requires that you write on a check or in an accompanying letter that you want the money to go to something. >>

and music from sam smith. with cleto and the cleotones. and now, here's jimmy kimmel!'m the host of the show. thank you for watching. thank you for -- for

sam smith & naughty boy with "la, la, la."ay." >>> in sports, let's begin with the nba playoffs, the atlanta hawks took control on their home court against indiana in the second half draining threes. they took some wild shots. nothing but net. game three goes to the hawks, 98-85, with a 2-1 series lead. >> up by four. he'll go to the line. >> oh, deja vu. oklahoma, a four-point play against memphis forcing overtime. and in the end, memphis' clutch shooting was the difference. 98-95, they go up 2-1. >>> l.a. and golden state slugged it out back and forth down to the final seconds. the clippers are ahead by two when they miss the game winner. los angeles wins, leading 2-1. >>> a long time rival showed michael phelps he's got some work to do. ryan lochte beats phelps in his fist comeback race. the 100 meter butterfly is not lochte's best race, but here is phelps after that race. >> i'm really excited about how things went. and i do know what i need to do if i want to continue. >> new york yankee pitcher michael pineda suspended f

and each of the 40 puts on the internet a little sign that says, sam smith pac. this money goes to people like sam smith. great people. now, we can give each of those 40 $5,000. they aren't coordinated, they're not established by a single person. each is independently run. and we know pretty well that that total of $5,000 times 40 will go to sam smith. okay? what does that violate? >> well, there's a couple problems with that hypothetical, your honor. first of all, there are base limits both on what can be given to a pac -- >> $5,000. >> and on what a pac can give to a candidate. >> $5,000. so we all have is my $5,000 going to the pac and there happened to be 400 pacs. so 5,000 times -- 4,000. five times 40, five times 400, how much is that? i'm not too good at math. [laughter] >> without doing the math, i will tell you that earmarking and proliferation restrictions -- >> no, no. there is no earmarking -- >> but -- but there's -- >> because earmarking requires that you write on a check or in an accompanying letter that you want the money to go to something. >> bu

we'll have music from neon trees, chucky weiss, birds of tokyo and sam smith, too.ever the opposite of arachnophobia is, our first guest has it. on may 2nd, she returns as peter parker-phile, gwen stacy in "the amazing spider-man 2." please welcome, emma stone. >> jimmy: is this something you would ever consider owning? >> this is something i didn't even consider existing much lis o less owning. it's so life like. it's really disconcerting. >> jimmy: it seems like real hair. >> is it david hasselhoff's m e hair? >> jimmy: i don't know if they collected it over a series of months. every hair has been individually placed. ever seen the story "never ending story." >> no. >> jimmy: it's a terrible movie, by the way, but the kid has a furry dragon that looks like something he won in an arcade or something. he rides around on it and i feel like this is my whatever that thing was. >> you want to get on him. >> jimmy: well, i actually did get on him. a and i felt like a poodle riding around on a german shepherd or something. really is something, though. he's very tight in t

. >> sam smith was named interim superintendent of the new orleans school district after the firing took place and works for the school board. the board fired the 7,000 employees. >> we would have prerd not to have done any of it, but we didn't have the student or the work. >> smith says beyond that the public schools were in need of a change. before katrina 65% of student were in failing schools, according to state rankings. >> no doubt there were challenges. i don't think anyone will sit and say the performance on the school system prior to katrina was adequate. >> it's not just local officials that believe the school system needed an over haul. arnie duncan in 2010 said "the best thing that happened to the system in northerly: >> as harsh as that may sound, numbers back him up. judged by state standard, the new system built around charter schools is outperforming the old one. fewer than 6% of students are in failing schools. >> are you happy with the perform assistance? >> no. you're never happy with performance. if you get to the point where you are happy with performance, it's time

we'll have music from sam smith. and newly-anointed espys host drake has a surprise for us too. jimmy: our first guest has leaped from the cover of the sports illustrated swimsuit issue right onto the big screen. she stars alongside cameron diaz and leslie mann, she stars as one of the other women in "the other woman," opening in theatres april 25th. please welcome kate upton. >> jimmy: good to see you. thank you for coming. >> good to see you. >> jimmy: you got back from germany. in germany, yes. >> the whole thing has been a whirlwind. i flew in from germany, i think yesterday. >> jimmy: for the movie you went over there. >> yeah, a whole european tour. >> jimmy: got you have you been to germany before? >> yes, i used to go there twice a month every month for two years. >> jimmy: twice a month. >> when i first started modeling. 15, 16. went over to germany. >> jimmy: who did you go with? >> my mom went a few times with me. then at the end of it she would be look you are going to do catalog and it's boring and i am not watching you model any more. so she sent me on my own. >> j

and on thursday seth macfarlane, paul bettany, music from sam smith and we have something fun plannedfun for us too. our first guest is a preposterously funny man who entertains, delights and impregnates everywhere he goes. you can hear him in the new movie "rio 2" starting friday and his new standup special "tracy morgan: bona fide" premieres april 20th on comedy central. please welcome tracy morgan. >> jimmy: tracy. you don't have to, you are not, you don't have to be blindfolded for this. this segment. this is a blindfold free segment. >> you haven't told me to take it off yet. >> jimmy: you can take it off. >> i follow instructions. >> jimmy: thank you for following instructions. how are you doing? >> i am good. >> you want these back. you can keep those. they're yours. yeah, souvenir. >> we will use these. these go perfect with my black leather mask with the zipper in the back. >> jimmy: the last time you were here, you just had a baby girl, just had a daughter. >> who? when? what? me, i just had a baby girl. >> jimmy: how old is she now? >> 9 months. just had a beautiful baby gi

in each of the 40 puts on internet rule sign that says sam smith packed.we can give each of those $45,000. they are not established by single person. each is independently run. we know pretty well bet that total of 5000 times will go to sam smith. what does that violate? >> there a couple of problems with that hypothetically your honor. first of all their base limits both on what can be given to a pac. >> $5000. >> and one attack can give to a candidate. >> $5000. all we have is my $5000 going to the pack. by a thousand times 4000. five times 40, five times 400 rate how much is that? >> earmarking requires that you write a check for a company letter that you want the money to go to someone. >> actually it does not. >> fec regulations are broader than that. if you have a path that is going to contribute to only one candidate. >> they will contribute to several. >> at that point then you don't have the traceability you are talking about because there's more money coming into the pac they can find its way to any one particular candidate. >> as the hypothetica

and later this week seth macfarlane, kate upton, paul bettany, cole hauser, and music from sam smithheaters april 18th. please welcome johnny depp. [ cheers and applause ] [ cheers and applause ] well, thank you for coming. >> thank you for having me. >> jimmy: they're excited. i'm excited. and i hate to start things off negatively or awkwardly. but last time you were here we kissed a few times. i felt like we really hit it off. >> right. >> jimmy: we had a few laughs together. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] it really seemed like we had some chemistry. and then the next thing i know i hear you're engaged. and i get no call or -- not even a text. it's just -- it was rude is what it was. [ laughter ] to come in, to do that and then to just disappear. >> i know. >> jimmy: anything you want to say? >> yeah, i know, i know. i feel -- i feel bad about it. >> jimmy: you do feel bad about it. [ laughter ] >> but i also feel like between you and i it's kind of an anything goes sort of thing. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: i like the way you think. >> you know what i mean? >> jimmy: so i'm not o