simon cowell is going to get married.ccording to reports he's going to get married on a boat that's going to be called "the simon cowell." yeah. he's buying a big boat, according to this report in the "mail," he's going to christen it "the simon cowell," it's going to pick up all the wedding guests in barbados, they're going to sail to st. bart's, he's going to get married. that's the lucky lady right there. she's a makeup artist in hollywood. mezghan hussainy is her name. so they're getting married soon. the ring, about $375,000, according to our math. but supposedly, i don't know if you remember this from when you got married or if this was even a consideration, it's bad luck to get married on a boat. >> i would just say as a rule it's probably bad luck to marry someone who's only naming the boat after himself. there's no acknowledgement of her in that boat which means she probably won't get a piece of it. she'll just go sell it. >> she probably knows going into it this is the simon cowell show. >> right, yeah, she's an

tonight we've got groping, we've got tickle, simon cowell's nipples. you name it.veryone in our audience tonight is going home with simon cowell's nipples, so, congratulations. [ cheers and applause ] it was another punishing night of "american idol." why do we do this to ourselves? tonight, the men sang, and they sang poorly, for the most part. they don't need four judges. what they need on the show is a gong, because we're a pit full of starving crocodiles, or choco-diles, either one. do you think crock dimes find that word racist? i bet they do. anyway, this "american idol," it's gotten to the point where the judges are having trouble coming up with ways to tell people they're bad. there are only so many times you can say "it was pitchy, dog," without people killing you. and he's found those, but now, what randy appears to be doing is, whatever simon says about a singer, like, two singers later randy repeats some version of it. it's "simon says" in a way. these are all from last night. >> i still haven't heard the right song connection yet. >> i just didn't feel

man, if only simon cowell could act. [ laughter ] ladies and gentlemen, we have a great show.ive it up for the roots! ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: yeah. thank you, roots. we have a fantastic show tonight. wow, i can't even believe that she's here. this is so cool. the beautiful actress and singer, janet jackson is here. [ cheers and applause ] love her. absolutely love her. of course, we have our friend, wwe superstar, john cena joining us. [ cheers and applause ] "wrestlemania," this sunday! he means business. and we've got music from the besnard lakes, everybody, who is going to be fantastic. [ cheers and applause ] going to be a great show. all right. ladies and gentlemen, it's time for "pros and cons." ♪ pros and cons and pros ♪ >> jimmy: "pros and cons," this is where we take a look at the stories and issues making headlines today and weigh the good with the bad. tonight's topic, the passing of the health care reform bill. all right, let's take a look at pros and cons. pros, kids can stay on their parents' health insurance until they are 26. cons. kid will stay in

by the way, think about it, simon cowell is like the smoke monster of "american idol."s off everyone that isn't a candidate on the show. and it is not a strong group of singers this year. even the judges, who picked these people, keep saying that. they've repeatedly complained that they sound like they're doing karaoke, and if there's one thing that "american idol" is not, it's karaoke. this is "american idol." ♪ there's a voice inside my head ying ♪ ♪ you'll never reach it ♪ every step i'm taking >> jimmy: and this is karaoke. ♪ there's a voice inside my head saying ♪ ♪ you'll never reach it ♪ every step i'm taking ♪ >> jimmy: see, that's -- they're totally different, and karaoke, you get to read the words on a screen. they don't have that there. now, this is a great performance. this is an actor named columbus short. he was in the movie "stomp the yard," one of my favorites. he was hosting a step dancing contest at fresno state university over the weekend and ironically, missed a step. and he's gone. now that's an entertainer. right to the good stuff. [ applause ] it'

. >> reporter: in the role of simon cowell, a.j., the infomercial king and head of telebrand.> are those pants getting too tight to close? >> call now and you'll also receive pedi paws. >> reporter: but wait, there's more. he's taken inventor's day on the road looking for the next biggest invention and the promise of making that inventor a millionaire. what are you ladies selling? >> the snazzy sun float. >> what are you wearing? >> the travel cozy here. >> the ultimate hands-release to walk your dog. >> reporter: each entrepreneur has just five minutes to make their pitch to a.j. and a panel of four judges, including his wife and business partner. >> i really like it. >> that's a problem. because i really don't like it. >> that's usually the case. >> reporter: only 10% of the hundreds of products he sees will he test marketed, and only 1% will make it. >> i think i have a good head to keep on looking and stuff and weed out very quickly the good stuff and the bad. >> anyone can put this on. >> reporter: some inventions made sense. what do you ladies have here? >> a cordless he

it's a little bit like listening to saoeupl co-- simon cowell delivering a lecture that people shouldn't utilize sarcasm because after these unfunded giveaways my colleagues put together a republican filibuster to attack the american worker in a completely inconsistent manner. so, i would say i have a different outlook. i think many of my colleagues here have a different outlook that we should be here to make america work for working americans. and that means that when they're hurting, we're going to assist them with unemployment insurance. we're going to help with the kpwa extension. we're going -- with the cobra extension. we're going to help with loans to small business and we're going to help seniors by fixing that medicare provision. we're not going to take the hammer to those programs. we're going to assist our working families. because of this republican filibuster, nearly 1.2 million americans will lose their benefits. and by june, this number will grow to 5 million unemployed workers will be left without vital benefits if congress doesn't act. now, let's talk about that small bu