george can make each of the judges purr like sharon osborne, or sneer like simon cowell.at are they going to make of this little stand up routine i knocked up with the help of chatgpt? good evening. how's everyone doing tonight? i mean, have you seen those vocal processors? they can turn a voice that sounds like a dying cat into something that could rival freddie mercury. how'd it do that! ? thank you. i think we've heard enough. yeah, i think i'll leave it to the experts. # ..to me. # crowd cheers. # i'm living my best life, best life...# welcome to miami — a city of golden beaches, glamour and entertainment... ..and the home of the miami heat basketball team. # i just want to celebrate, life's too short. ..# tonight, i'mjoining fans for a match. it's an experience not to miss when visiting the city, as much about the pre—game entertainment as it is about the sports. but this isn'tjust a sports team. this is a tech start—up. most people wouldn't think of this when thinking of a professional sports team, but we have a very robust technology operation. as spectators move a

obviously she's defending simon cowell, who is her on bgt . she probably her boss on bgt.hing you say as a celebrity can turn into a salacious story, especially if you're going for someone who's outspoken as sharon osbourne, who did not keep quiet about this, who's come back and attacked amanda and said, you are very ill, ill informed and you're sycophantic as well, frantic, i hope i said that right. and she said that basically you have no right to say that you don't know nothing about my career, because fair enough. sharon x factor enough. sharon was on x factor for a very long time, but she's beenin for a very long time, but she's been in the music industry for decades , even. she said. i've decades, even. she said. i've been living beverley mansions been living in beverley mansions from beverly hills, mansions from beverly hills, mansions from the time you were born. and she i am a global she says, i am a global celebrity. so this was really a slanging match going back and forth. and obviously in this attack back from sharon, she is talking about all of her credentials.

george can make each of the judges purr like sharon osbourne or sneer like simon cowell. are they going to make of this little stand—up routine i knocked up with the help of chatgpt? good evening. how's everyone doing tonight? i mean, have you seen those vocal processers? they can turn a voice that sounds like a dying cat into something that could rival freddie mercury. how did it do that? thank you! i think we've heard enough. yeah. yeah, i think i'll leave it to the experts. # is love to me. applause and cheering oh, thank you. # oh, i'm living my best life # best life... alasdair: welcome to miami, a city of golden beaches, glamour and entertainment... # wanting it, wanting more... ..and the home of the miami heat basketball team. # i just want to celebrate life's too short # tonight i'm joining fans for a match. it's an experience not to miss when visiting this city — as much about the pre—game entertainment as it is about the sport. but this isn'tjust a sports team. this is a tech start—up. most people wouldn't think of this when thinking of a professional sports tea

simon cowell's quiet life in the country is ruined by moles as the furry creatures infest. . after after leaving london, he was leaving london. not the furry creatures, so is this real? these are all from the papers today, right? by the way, joe, is that one april 4th, or is that real? >> i think that might be true. >> i think that might be true. >> real, too. >> i think that's real, too. >> i think that's real, too. >> interesting. >> okay, interesting. >> okay, interesting. >> like , would i lie to you? >> like, would i lie to you? >> like, would i lie to you? >> the last one and the last. i'm really rubbish . chris i'm really rubbish. chris o'shea. that job on mastermind i'm really rubbish. chris o'definitelyt job on mastermind i'm really rubbish. chris 0' definitely not on mastermind i'm really rubbish. chris 0' definitely not mine,astermind i'm really rubbish. chris 0' definitely not mine, is:ermind i'm really rubbish. chris 0' definitely not mine, is itmind i'm really rubbish. chris 0' definitely not mine, is it ,1ind is definitely not mine, is it, meanwhile, one to m

. >> i'm rivalling simon cowell for the chest hair. >> can you do another button for the ladies?n you do another button for the larcourse can. i'll >> of course i can. i'll be naked end of the hour. naked by the end of the hour. don't that. don't worry about that. >> another button done 7 up. up? >> she % me? does. >> she want me? does. >> she want me? does. >> about this story? the >> what about this story? the tories? i'm quite shocked about this. a on a this. william wragg on a on a gay dating site. the tinder thing. sharing other thing. sharing numbers of other hot backbenchers . hot tory backbenchers. >> i know it's astonishing, and it always makes me think when will politicians ever learn these scandals have been going on since the beginning of time. nobody ever learns from them. it's the same old thing, and it's always seems to be some tory politician or peer. oh come on, who's involved in a scandal? i mean, i'm not necessarily anti—tory, but it always seems to be the tory. >> what is about tories and sex? >> well, i think he's repressed posh boys, but william wragg's not

. >> i'm rivalling simon cowell for the chest hair. >> can you do another button for the ladies?n you do another button for the larcourse can. i'll >> of course i can. i'll be naked end of the hour. naked by the end of the hour. don't that. don't worry about that. >> another button done 7 up. up? >> she % me? does. >> she want me? does. >> she want me? does. >> about this story? the >> what about this story? the tories? i'm quite shocked about this. a on a this. william wragg on a on a gay dating site. the tinder thing. sharing other thing. sharing numbers of other hot backbenchers . hot tory backbenchers. >> i know it's astonishing, and it always makes me think when will politicians ever learn these scandals have been going on since the beginning of time. nobody ever learns from them. it's the same old thing, and it's always seems to be some tory politician or peer. oh come on, who's involved in a scandal? i mean, i'm not necessarily anti—tory, but it always seems to be the tory. >> what is about tories and sex? >> well, i think he's repressed posh boys, but william wragg's not

she just got an mba, which i think is well deserved as simon cowell's, involved with it.ny added, many, many celebrities are there and they do a great job and they got the 20 year ball coming up shortly , 20 year ball coming up shortly, which is going to be a fabulous evening. so yes, i, you know , evening. so yes, i, you know, very pleased to say that i, you know, can help them out. it's great work you're doing. >> and i know you've been involved in politics like i am sometimes rich people, people that earn a lot of money, get a lot of stick. but when you look at how much money you put back into society through through income tax, through corporation tax , through your business, tax, through your business, through employing hundreds of people, they're all paying income tax in mass insurance. that's right. do you think sometimes these entrepreneurs, these rich people get get a raw deal from. >> well, they they you know, they all seem to think you're greedy, etc. and, you know, they say you shouldn't say how much you're put in charity and all that, which is nonsense. i don

the moles had made lots of mole hill. >> so simon cowell's got 80 acres in the cotswolds , right?re. and i imagine if that happened your imagine if that happened to your garden, do ? how garden, what would you do? how would you deal with the mole who lives in the hole? >> you have to whack mole. >> you have to the whack a mole. >> you have to the whack a mole. >> a mole? >> the whack a mole? >> the whack a mole? >> yeah, well, you'd have to whack mole. well, what do you. whack a mole. well, what do you. there be humane way of there must be a humane way of whacking a mole. whack in a mole? yeah, maybe you can scurry a mole away. >> but what do you do with all those appear in your back garden? >> and do you get rid of >> and how do you get rid of them? >> wouldn't be best with >> and i wouldn't be best with them. >> you a f— f you a friend of >> or are you a friend of nature, or do you get a shotgun or what happens? >> no. >> well, no. >> well, no. >> think there'd be people >> you think there'd be people you and can come you can call and they can come sort your eradicators? yes. so

sort of a simon cowell to say yea or nay? yes. harsh but fair!rypted forums. there's nothing here, though, mate. what you mean there's nothing here? what about the from rotherham? what about him? snooping around the allotments. how are we doing back there, willie? soil's very dry, caroline. oh, come on! _ i got them into this mess, paul. get off my husband! for all we know, lawrence and louise could be dead now! everything was going through my head. ijust couldn't put it together. yeah, i think in hindsight— we probably should have gone to the police at that stage. you'll never take me alive, copper! that sounds very fast—paced, doesn't it? it's got everything. the film's writer and co—director brook driverjoins us now, alongside professional veg grower kevin fortey — also known as the giant veg man. welcome, both of you. good morning. as ben welcome, both of you. good morning. as lten says. — welcome, both of you. good morning. as lten says. it — welcome, both of you. good morning. as ben says, it has _ welcome, both of you. good morning. as ben

george can make each of thejudges purr like sharon osbourne or sneer like simon cowell.'s an experience not to miss when visiting this city — as much about the pre—game entertainment as it is about the sport. but this isn'tjust a sports team — this is a tech start—up. most people wouldn't think of this when thinking of a professional sports team, but we have a very robust technology operation. as spectators move around the venue, data is carefully being gathered about everything they do and purchase before being analysed on the team's own data platform that they call 601 analytics. we knew that we had reached an inflection point — and this was roughly eight, nine years ago — where we have all of this technology in the building and we wanted to know what the technology was telling us. and so, we went to market to see if there was anything out there. we couldn't find anything, so we started building it for ourselves. after a few years, we found it really impacted our business. so, think about from the time you walk into a building, the time you purchase a ticket, you purch

george can make each of the judges purr like sharon osbourne or sneer like simon cowell.d enough. yeah. yeah, i think i'll leave it to the experts. # is love to me # applause and cheering # oh, i'm living my best life # best life...# alasdair: welcome to miami, a city of golden beaches, glamour and entertainment... # wanting it, wanting more...# ..and the home of the miami heat basketball team. # i just want to celebrate # life's too short # tonight i'm joining fans for a match. it's an experience not to miss when visiting this city — as much about the pre—game entertainment as it is about the sport. but this isn'tjust a sports team. this is a tech start—up. most people wouldn't think of this when thinking of a professional sports team, but we have a very robust technology operation. as spectators move around the venue, data is carefully being gathered about everything they do and purchase, before being analysed on the team's own data platform that they call 601 analytics. we knew that we had reached an inflection point and this was roughly eight, nine years ago, where we