hugh laurie, snooki, chaz bono and

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when snooki says jump you say how high. when snooki says tan, you say how tang.place for 20 minutes while she got her teeth whitened. true story. and frankly, i'd do it again. i'd do it gen damn it if snooki told me to. i bet you anything

when snooki says jump you say how high. when snooki says tan, you say how tang.place for 20

when snooki says jump, you say how high. when snooki says tan, you say how tan. she actually also made me wait at that tan place for 20 minutes while she got her teeth whitened. true story.

and jersey shore's snookie announced she is marketing her own perfume. by the way i said jersey shore's snookie so you know which one i was talking about. happy cranky co cocoa workers day. >> this bit is getting old. >> what bit? >> the day you send some sort of message you think is subtle, but it is really not. >> that's crazy, greg. cranky co worker days is an actual day. >> i'm sure it is, just as i'm sure you picked it for a reason. >> you are wrong, greg. i thought it was a funny day. >> yeah, right. >> i'm serious. i don't know what it is. it just sounded funny. >> seriously? >> then i apologize. >> it is okay. >> it is a funny day. >> happy cranky co-workers day. >> happy cranky co-workers day to you. >> maybe you can learn something from it. >> let's welcome our guest. she is so cute that hello kitty has a picture of her on her backpack. she is the co-host of the of "the five" and if brains were baby powder he would prevent chafing in all of your problem areas. it is chris barron, co-chairman of the board. and he is filling in for bill. bill sch

when snooki says jump, you say how high.

snooki has officially had more books published than harper lee.you. while snooki was making the talk show rounds for her new book, she got regis to do something on national television that frankly you just have to see for yourself. take a look. >> i'm going to get snookified. >> it's called snookified, reg. guidos usually don't wear ties. take off your shirt. >> yeah, you should take off your shirt and have no shirt and a tie. >> let this happen. >> you think i'm afraid of you? >> i want to see where this goes. [ cheers ] >> i love when kelly said, "let this happen." reege, reege, what snapped? are you so powerless in the face of snooki's charms, you'll do anything she asks you to do, no questions asked? just like that you'll take off your shirt, simply because snooki said it was a good idea? and on tv no less. who would do such a thing? >> snooki's here. very excited. >> hi. oh, my god, you're pale. >> take off your shirt. so first we're going to start with a little body contouring. >> i had no idea that mr. anderson had muscles. i love the smell

>> snooki is definitely not a role model. snooki is there to have fun and live her life.w, i'm just loveable i guess. >> one of the things you write about in the book, chapter called "snookin for love." it starts out funny but you do talk about wanting to be in a relationship and perhaps haven't made the right relationship. i'm not asking you to put a name on it, what type of guy would be a good partner for you? >> i would say right now my boyfriend is amazing. i like a guy that makes me laugh, doesn't care about this, you know, the fame own the show. he just likes me for me. he likes me as nicole. so you know, you just got to make me laugh and keep up with me and you got my heart. >> someone with a big heart. >> yes. >> what can match hearts with you. >> and has a big family and loves their mom. >> and has to be italian. you say you want to have babies with an italian because you want your kids' last name to have a vowel in it. >> very true. a little picky. >> nicole great to have you here. >> thank you very much. >> "confessions of a guedette." >>> coming up, bette midl

nicole "snooki" poe lizzy. >> jimmy: i'm not your type. >> aside from looks -- well, you are tan. >> dicky: from "dancing with the stars," chaz bono.

jersey shore. >> got a new book out. >> bill: snooki does?onfessions of a guidette. suggest everyone read it. >> bill: they do this. >> you are going to get -- called snookified. >> jersey don't wear ties. take off your shirt. >> have no shirt. >> i'm ---i want to see where this goes. [cheers] >> this is good. >> put the tie on. [cheers] >> bill: so why was that dumb? >> it's not dumb, actually. because he is 80 years old and he is in great shape. this is the first time in the history that the two phrases regis and topless have been paired together. >> bill: why did snooki want him to take his shirt off? >> because the situation has a.b.s. that's the guy on the show. don't ask me. i don't watch it. >> i watch every episode. >> bill: why did snooki want to see regis topless? >> because they never wear clothes on the show. and no secret she has been in love with regis and rumor has it they actually left together after the show. >> bill: that's not true. >> what have you been drinking today. >> bill: second lawsuit filed against lawsuit. first o

including regis philbim and snooki.or ] i played professional basketball for 12 years. today i own 165 wendy's restaurants. and i get my financing from ge capital. but i also get stuff that goes way beyond banking. we not only lend people money, we help them save it. [ junior ] ge engineers found ways to cut my energy use. [ cheryl ] more efficient lighting helps junior stay open later... [ junior ] and serve more customers. so you're not just getting financial capital... [ cheryl ] you're also getting human capital. not just money. knowledge. [ junior ] ge capital. they're not just bankers... we're builders. [ junior ] ...and they've helped build my business. what ya usin' there, kevin? lipless crankbait, jamie. seems you'd be best off with a red eye shad. i know you're lookin' at the new basspro.com. two ways to get free shipping at basspro.com. ship to the store. or free shipping to home on your entire order with any hunting clothing purchase. whether you're an allstate customer or not. all you have to do is call. [

the things we do for snooki, huh? that clip a little bit later in the show. not that bad, actually. >>> before we get to the news live here in 30 rock, a world series game that's already being placed up there with the very best in history. it was a game riddled early on with little league errors and mistakes. the st. louis cardinals battled back, coming from behind to beat the texas rangers in 11 innings. the cardinals were twice down to their last strike in the game. in the ninth, hometown hero david freese, grew up in the area rooting for the cardinals hit a triple. looked like it might end the game. drops before the wall. in the tenth, rangers took a two-run lead on a hamilton on home run, but the cardinals respond, just would not die in front of the home fans. lance berkman tying it with a two-strike single in the bottom of the 11th. then the play they'll be talking about for a long time, freese with a solo home run in the 11th inning, a walkoff to end the game, capping the impossible comeback and forcing a game seven. that's only the tip of the iceberg.

including regis philbim and snooki.ments away. 4g-- the next evolution in wireless technology. with advanced power, the verizon 4g lte network makes your business run faster: smartphones, laptops, tablets, mobile hotspots. but not all 4g is created equal. among the major carriers, only verizon's 4g network is 100% lte, the gold standard of wireless technology. and while other carriers may have limited lte coverage, verizon is the largest lte network in america and ever-growing. with verizon 4g lte, you can invent new ways to upgrade your business using real-time group meetings from remote locations, video conferencing, mobile credit-card payments, lightning-fast downloads, and access to thousands of business apps. plus, verizon has the largest selection of 4g lte devices and the most 4g lte coverage for your business. all on america's fastest, most reliable 4g network. no wonder more businesses choose verizon wireless than any other wireless carrier. verizon. >> bill: dumbest things of the week. here they are to sort it

katy perry. >> last year -- snooki was kind of last year. >> snooki was last year.y see some snookis this year, too, i would imagine. >> back across to kath. >> from minnesota. how many pounds did the largest pumpkin ever grown weigh? 101? 459? 1,810 in or 2,012 pounds? >> 1,810. >> how did you know that? >> gosh, with such confidence. like he knew it. >> how did he know that? >> that's huge. how big is that? >> it's huge. 810 pounds. it was sent -- 1,800, yeah. >> cleaning that thing. can you even imagine the gook in there. >> even carving it. would take you forever. >> back across to kath. >> last lady, she's from rochester, new york. all righty. what were hoda and i last year for halloween? morticia and gomez, samantha and carrie, sandy and danny from "grease" or lucy and ethel? >> "b?" >> watch us often, huh. >> we were lucy and ethel, for god's sakes. we'll never forget that. jumping around in that big vat of grapes. >> i'm trying to guess what you guys are going to be this year. i don't know. >> thanks for coming, linda. >>> up next, we're going to catch up wi

especially the same week snooki vomits into a ceiling fan. >> dicky: antonio banderas. >> that's right. >> dicky: "science bob" pflugfelder. and music from jane's addiction. >> three, two, one! >> jimmy: wow! your children will tell their children that their parents were killed by a >> jimmy: hi, i'm jimmy kimmel with a message from cars.com, where you can shop confidently with a wide selection of new and used vehicles, side-by-side comparisons, consumer and expert vehicle reviews and tools to make sure you get the right car at the right price. my friend guillermo here, we were talking earlier, but -- where is he? this is so -- >> jimmy, i am out here. >> jimmy: guillermo, why are you out there? what are you doing? >> i am making wieners. >> jimmy: oh. why are you making wieners? >> me and my amigos are tailgating to get ready for our favorite show, "jimmy kimmel live!" >> here we go, jimmy, here we go! >> jimmy: thank you. that's very, very nice, guillermo. but the show is about to start. >> but what about my wieners? >> jimmy: well, maybe you can make them and tailgate at a college f

when snooki says jump, you say how high. when snooki says tan, you say how tan. she actually also made me wait when snooki says tan, you say how tan. she actually also made me wait at that tang place for 20 minutes while she got her teeth whitened. true story. and frankly, i'd do it again. i'd do it gen damn it if snooki told me to. i bet you anything regis philbin feels the same way. that does it for us, thanks for watching, i'll see you again at 10:00 p.m. tonight. >>> we're on the frontline with bernie madoff tonight. his family talking to the press in a full-court press. why? his former attorney comes out front. >>> it's just a few days until halloween. we were up to some mischief today and we can't resist sharing it with you. >>> and the bottom line on the tea party. how much sway do they really hold over the gop? answers, let's go "outfront." -- >>> i'm erin burnett. "outfront" on a friday night, the most shaky republican race since 1964. six different candidates have led in the national polls so far this year. it's amazing to think about it. but there is a

there was an embarrassing moment when snooki was mistaken for a grape. [ laughter ] snooki was a ballf fire tonight on "jersey shore." i won't bother to explain why this happened but well, just watch it. ♪ >> stopping getting in my business you [ bleep ] [ bleep ]. stop getting in my business you [ bleep ]. stop! stop! i'm not even kidding, mike, [ bleep ] you. [ bleep ] you. you [ bleep ]. [ bleep ] you. >> i didn't -- >> [ bleep ] you, mike. >> i didn't -- >> mike, i'm not kidding. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: got some arm. they should get her to pitch in the little league world series next year. you know, most people think "jersey shore" is a bunch of orange people binge drinking and exposing their genitals and for the most part, it is. but if you really watch the show and you really listen to what they're saying you will find something thought provoking in every episode. you just have to piece it together yourself. well, like this. >> every generation, there the course of history literally from jurassic time to today does a necessary evil so their people can feel sophisticated and class

one day my dream of a president snooki might become a reality. this is an odd story. of john lennon's teeth is going up for auction in england. i guess the tooth fairy is finally cashing in and it's a molar he gave his housekeeper as a gift. either that or he said throw this out and she didn't speak english but she has it and selling it. regis and kelly were talking about it and mentioned mother renowned collector of auction items. >> here's some other things that have other interesting things that have sold in the past. clippings of elvis presley's hair, sold in 2009 for $15,000. yes. jimmy kimmel's, gary coleman's size xl gap sweatpants in 2008 for -- oh, no, there were fake bids as high as $400,000. they don't tell us what jimmy kimmel actually paid. >> i thought jimmy was a little taller than gary coleman. >> i think he just wanted to have them. >> he wanted to have gary coleman's sweatpants. >> we're not sure why. >> interesting about that jimmy kimmel guy. >> jimmy: why wouldn't you want to have gary coleman sweatpants. not only do i own gary coleman's pants the

>> nicole "snooki" paluzzo is on the plaza with us right now. recent trip to italy as part of "jersey shore" got a new book out telling people how to be a guedette and talking to us about her search for love as well. >> all right. >> also ahead bette midler is here, auctioning off some of her most prized possessions including costumes from "the rose" from "beaches" from the famous mermaid outfit which i cannot wait to check out up close and personal. bette will be here to talk to us all about it. >> the divine requesting miss m." on monday our annual halloween costume contest on the plaza on monday, finalists will receive vip passes to our live concert from justin bieber on the day before thanksgiving. and the big winner, the overall winner gets to meet him. so make your plans now to be here on our plaza monday, halloween day, october 31st. and then wednesday, november 3rd, 23rd i should say, justin bieber, november 23rd. >> the day before thanksgiving. >> i think they're already spending the night here, they're already here. >> let's go inside,

snooki. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: there you go. very good.ber three. that will be you. rhyme wave, why don't you get him started, will you? >> three, two, one, flow. ♪ ♪ this is nbc not 11 hard to tell this ain't hell i might go right to heaven ♪ ♪ i got a bad chick yeah, she's got a tooshie my name is vinny ♪ ♪ and my girlfriend's name is snooki matter fact, a colored girl yeah, i said a black queen ♪ ♪ put her on the wall and now you talking about a flat screen ♪ ♪ they said vinny, yeah i just said venny wailin you ain't get the memo this ain't leno ♪ ♪ this is jimmy fallon [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: all right, buddy. [ cheers and applause ] whoa. that's what i'm talking about, my man. all right. time to pick a winner. why don't you guys come over here right now? ♪ all right. very, very good job, all three of you guys. but, our audience is going to decide who won. was it roosevelt? [ cheers ] was it will? [ cheers ] was it vechi? [ cheers and applause ] we have a winner. vechi, emcee. vechi, right there! ♪ that's great, my man. as ou

when snooki says jump, you say how high. when snooki says tan, you say how tan. she actually also made me wait at that tan place for 20 minutes while she got her teeth whitened. true story. and frankly, i'd do it again. i'd do it again, damn it, if snooki told me to. i bet you anything regis philbin feels the same way. that does it for us, thanks for watching. >>> we're on the frontline with bernie madoff tonight. his family talking to the press in a full-court press. why? his former attorney comes out front. >>> it's just a few days until halloween. we were up to some mischief today and we can't resist sharing it with you. >>> and the bottom line on the tea party. how much sway do they really holdover the gop? holdover the gop? answers, let's go "outfront." -- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com >>> i'm erin burnett. "outfront" on a friday night, the most shaky republican race since 1964. six different candidates have led in the national polls so far this year. it's amazing to think about it. but there is a big reason for it. the tea party. a cnn poll shows that

jersey shore cast mates are also popular, but i guess snooky is going to be the winner.ngry bird will be a good one to choose from as well. >>> well, remember this guy. he was the hottest scandal in d.c. for about five months ago when he was sexting some of his female companions. it's also going to be one of the hottest hollywood costumes. include the 20-dollar pair of boxers that come with accessories. if you can't get to manhattan to pick up that mask, they do have a website. leave the boxer shorts at home. >>> we know you're upset about the charges from bank of america. what they'll do to your debit card. while people are signing petitions and shopping at other banks, we haven't heard from bank of america about in idea until now. what the ceo is saying this morning. that's straight ahead. that have earned the keurig brewed seal of approval. the keurig brewed seal is our commitment that the coffee inside will deliver a delicious cup of coffee every time. keurig brewed. look for the only mark of genuine keurig quality. good morning, bob, thank you for joining us. first

the female snooki performs he mating dance. as usual, she is intoxicated.iologists believe creatures like these may represent a key link between primates and modern man. chef has fallen. revealing her buttock, to the delight of the nearby man. here, she attempts to mate with a female called deena. with their relatively small brains and overactive sex drives, these fascinating creatures may spend as many as 14 hours a day smushing. could they be the missing link between primate and man? up next, muscular males battle for dominance. only on "manimals from new jersey." >> jimmy: see? i blame james franco. [ applause ] you know, long, long before snooki and the situation came into our lives, mtv had although show where roommates got drunk and fought each other called "the real world." it's still on. it's in his 26th season, which is ridiculous, but -- [ laughter ] this season, one of the house mates is a bisexual named frank. last night, frank brought a guy home to have sex, they had sex all over the house, which is what you do when there are cameras. and -- [

. >> reality tv star snooki not necessarily feeling the love in new york why local lawmakers want her to stay at the jersey shore. pgh >>> >> and as we head to the break the latest weather and traffic from tony and julie. we will be right back drinkin'? u i'm drinkin' dunkin'. coffee -- black, straight up. extra cream, three sugars. iced coffee french vanilla. for me. iced coffee with a turbo shot. i'm drinkin' dunkin'. i'm drinkin' dunkin'. i'm drinkin' dunkin'. drinkin' dunkin'. america runs on dunkin' coffee. >>> making headlines the last of the remaining escaped animals in ohio have been found and that animal had been consumed by another one of the animals. police were looking for -- >> that is disturbing. >> for a monkey those are tigers. the last remaining animal was a monkey turns out one of the larger cats police shot and killed got to the monkey before anyone else did. why deputies had to shoot and kill the animals, because they were hungry. humane society criticized the state's governor allowing a statewide ban on buying and selling of exotic pets to expire in april

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. >>> and nicole "snooki" polizzi from the "jersey shore" talks about her new book "confessions of a guidette." >>> keep it on this channel for continuing news, sports, weather and more. i'm lynn berry. thanks for watching "early today," just your first stop of the day today on your nbc station. have a good one.

snooki changed to spray tans. i don't know if that's consolation. >> very popular. all right. >>> another bill signed by the governor will require insurance companies to provide coverage for autistic children. the bill's opponents say it will increase insurance premiums. but supporters say it will save money in the long run by preparing kids for life as adults. >>> among the governor's other actions, he signed a bill that allows kids 12 and older to get the hpv vaccine without parental consent. he also signed a bill to prevent local police from impounding cars at sobriety checkpoints if the driver's only offense is not having a license. saturday the governor vetoed a bill that would have let the state's public universities consider an applicant's race and sex in admissions decisions. >>> they are getting bigger. today labor unions are getting involved in one of those "occupy" protests here in the bay area. kristy seifkin is in san francisco where those demonstrators are showing no signs of slowing down. >> good morning. >> reporter: still seeing several protestors o

. >>> one state makes a law, teens for example you want the golden glow, you got to go snookie style not going in a tanning bed. >>> i'm linda so what is planned today for protesters in the occupy wall street movement. and even though you do what you can to take care of it, sometimes you want to give your immune system some support. try new airborne chewable tablets. each serving contains 14 vitamins, minerals and herbs... including zinc, echinacea, ginger, and a blast of vitamin c. it's the easy, great-tasting way to help support your immune system. airborne. in fast-acting effervescent formula, and new super-convenient chewable tablets! ♪ jif to go goes anywhere ♪ jif to go goes here, goes there ♪ ♪ jif to go goes everywhere ♪ goes here, goes there ♪ jif to go, wherever you go

especially the same week snooki

beavis and butt-head take on snookie and the tomorrow night flicks. this is the "cbs morning news." with chili's $6 lunch break combos, featuring texas toast half sandwiches. chili's lunch break combos. is saturday. hurry in for your last chance to get the lowest prices of the season. with the biggest savings on apparel to appliances, the top brands of tools to the newest electronics and more. that's real deals for real savings. sears. >>> at least seven people are dead after an indiana highway crash. police say a tractor-trailer slammed into a minivan last night. this was on the border near michigan. ten people were in that minivan. three were taken to hospitals along with the truckdriver. witnesses say the minivan may have hit a deer and stopped before being hit by that truck. >>> in the manslaughter trial of michael jackson's doctor, dr. conrad murray, will not testify in his own defense. his last witness took the stand yesterday. that would be dr. paul white. he rejected the prosecution's theory on how jackson died. >> if, in fact, murray had administered the drugs that he descr