you can say, "there's somethg else i can do." it can be as simple as going for a walk, calling a friend, doing something, and there's a choice point that says, "ok. either i'll relive this experience again, or i'll take active steps to not relive the experience." when you recognize that you're choosing, then you have the opportunity to do something different about it. a year and a half down the road is when i went to my second c.o.p.s. seminar. i could recognize the new ones by the look in their eyes. the survivors who are new have dead eyes, like shark eyes. there's no depth and no life, and i knew i still looked like that. knew i had choices to make. i could choose to let the anger destroy me, or i could conquer it and strike some blows as far as changing attitudes. so it was a conscious choice for me, and i can look back and see the girls and i have made it. we weren't happy about it, but it feels good to turn a negative experience into a positive action, and we'll keep making it. [horns honking] [jackhammer] [siren] captionin