a sandwich, two plates of spaghet spaghetti, wine, a small orphan child. he even tried to speak italian. all right. then there was ted cruz. next week, maybe he'll hand slaughter a chicken in accordance with islamic dietary law. little known candidate tommy johnson couldn't write -- ride a skateboard. that's not the temperament for my president. john kerry ordered a cheese steak and ordered the wrong cheese. he threw a baseball like a roofied raggedy ann. i've seen better arms on a squid. i've come up with some tips when asked to do something normal. first, never do something normal. i can't make pizza so it was embarrassing when fox and friends asked me to make one. i had a bad night. it tastes delicious. number two, only do something you've really good at. you can't throw a baseball, that's okay. you could be like me, massage a cat. it's not like a regular thing between us. number three, take your time. never be in a hurry. slow down, buddy. summer will be here soon. the fact is politicians have hard time doing normal things because they aren't normal. t