your name at that point was tola grossman. she said, "tola, remember. remember this place."e things. she took me around and she showed me soap... ..made from human fat. and i remember she said to me, "shall we take it?" isaid, "no, i'm not even touching it." she wanted to remember. she wanted the world eventually... she never talked about it publicly, by the way. mm. and she only spoke to people who were there. earlier, when we were talking about your mother, you talked about the way in which some of her memories, particularly what happened with her nieces, was something she could never get over, and she died young and i think she died mentally very troubled, of course. very, very, very troubled. now, people talk about survivor's guilt after the holocaust, after places like auschwitz. right. is it a phrase that means anything to you? how would you describe...? i don't feel like that. i feel in a sense a survivor's obligation, the obligation to tell the story... ..and to lead a life that is meaningful because why am i saved if i'm wasting it? so, most of the people that i per