trevor: no. >> i thought i smelled something nice. >> trevor: that was me.>> that's kid stuff. revor: that's an american joke. >> when you have kids that's hilarious to them. [laughing] >> trevor: oh, man. the new season on "comedians in cars getting coffee" is streaming now. comediansincarsgettingcoffee.com jerry seinfeld, everybody. [cheers and applause] my fellow americans... they say we're a nation divided. that's not true. we agree on a lot. like paul rudd. everybody loves paul rudd. i didn't know this was going to happen! you know what else everyone loves? emojis. no. beer! that's why we're forming the bud light party. just wait till you see our caucus. we've got the biggest caucus in the country! ooooeeeyyyyy! i'm really inspired right now. america has seen the light... and there's a bud in front of it! sfx: crowd cheers, fireworks ♪ the products in our bath time routine, work together like a team. a combination designed to help improve your baby's skin barrier while you stimulate his senses. johnson's®. so much more™ sweetheart, don't look at me like

(cheers and applause) ♪ >> trevor: welcome to "the daily show"! i'm trevor noah!hank you so much, everybody! our guest tonight, youtube star lilly singh is here, people! (cheers and applause) that's right. she is here. if you like your interview, don't forget to rate and subscribe. subscribe right here. but first, such sad news. we have to start the show with some fond farewells. >> the republican field is narrowing. rick santorum suspended his campaign last night. rand paul and mike huckabee also dropped out. >> trevor: no! my sweet right wing princes! my beautiful conservative gentlemen! we were just getting to know each other! now that they're out of the race, oddly enough, these people wield a lot more influence through the power of endorsements. nothing boosts a presidential candidate more than the enthusiastic endorsement of one of his peers. rick santorum knows this. which is why as soon as he stepped out of the race, he said he was endorsing marco rubio, which led a lot of people to say, oh, okay, tell us why. and tats when the trouble began. >> what do yo

>> trevor: no the cast. he cost? >> trevor: the cast.'m tripping. i'm tripping. >> trevor: the cast. (american accent... ) the cast. >> oh! i got it! i didn't know what you were saying. i was trying to clear it up because i was confused. i ain't from here. it's a good cause. good cause. >> trevor: house of the cast in the movie, anthony? >> it's great, man! a great cast of people and we had a good time and i knew once i got cost in this movie it would be a brilliant situation of costing for the costing director. i didn't understand, but we back, we're right here. >> trevor: you know this is black on black, don't you know. >> i know it! see that? i didn't understand you! now i understand you, bro! i got you, tramp! come on, man! i got you! bring it back! >> trevor: go watch the movie. it has an amazing cast. "triple 9" in hi. hi... i love your pants. thanks. these pants are really speaking to me. can i look at the back? ooooooooooooooh! do you even know what you have back there? give me your pants. you should go to old navy. all pants are

to "the daily show" i'm trevor noah. my guest tonight comedian hannibal buress is joining us. [cheers and applause] >> trevor: but let's move on. last night we got so caught up in the iowa caucus we forgot to celebrate, groundhog day. ya. also, what the hell is groundhog day. [laughing] >> trevor: people pull a rodent out of the ground. then ask the animal to predict the weather. you know, this is so unfair. because if africans were doing this [beep], and you heard that we pulled animals out of the ground -- i mean there are villages in africa where people wear animal skin. if i tried to explain americans used ground hog to predict the weather. they would be like, why not use satellite data. let's move on. last night we got so caught up in the iowa caucus we forgot to celebrate groundhog day. also what the hell is groundhog day. people pull a rodent out of the ground and ask the animal to predict the weather this. is so unfair. no, no. if africans were doing [beep] like this and you heard we pulled animals oust ground. t

(cheers and applause) ♪ >> trevor: welcome to "the daily show"! i'm trevor noah.y guest tonight, peter bergen is going us, everybody! (cheers and applause) but first -- but first, obviously, we have to talk about last night. the iowa caucus, after a year of waiting, after all that build up, people finally voted. guess what? donald trump didn't win! (cheers and applause) yeah! but ted cruz did! (audience reacts) oh, i thought you guys would be happen p pi about that. ah. also, bernie sanders won! (cheers and applause) yeah, but not as much as hillary clinton! (cheers and applause) it's such a weird thing. so they both won, and he sort of didn't. i guess they awarded it to her, which means she can lose in november to ted cruz, that's what that means, i think. i have to say, american elections are super fun. this is my first time watching the iowa caucus. after hearing about how sophisticated american democracy is, it was nice to see the process for the first time, because wow... >> last call for the ballots. they stuffed them all into these popcorn ballots. i can't

trevor: no. >> i thought i smelled something nice. >> trevor: that was me.ne. >> you're suppose to say, i just had gas. [laughing] >> that's kid stuff. revor: that's an american joke. >> when you have kids that's hilarious to them. [laughing] >> trevor: oh, man. the new season on "comedians in cars getting coffee" is streaming now. comediansincarsgettingcoffee.com jerry seinfeld, everybody. [cheers and applause] there has to be a way. carry the centimeter, divide by 3.14 something something something... [ beeping, whirring ] great caesar salad! ♪ and now the name your price tool shows people policy options to help fit their budget. is that a true story? yeah! people really do save an average of over $500 when they switch. i mean about you inventing it. i invented the story, and isn't that what really matters? so... what else about me? they carry your fans' passions, shouhopes, and dreamscarry pads. and maybe, a chance at greatness... because shoulders were made for greatness. not dandruff i was in the military for 18 years. i joined the service so i could se

trevor: no. >> i thought i smelled something nice. >> trevor: that was me.ou're suppose to say, i just had gas. [laughing] >> that's kid stuff. revor: that's an american joke. >> when you have kids that's hilarious to them. [laughing] >> trevor: oh, man. the new season on "comedians in cars getting coffee" is streaming now. comediansincarsgettingcoffee.com jerry seinfeld, everybody. [cheers and applause] ♪ around the world, around the clock. in defense of all we hold dear back home. [ tires screech ]] ahhhhh!!! [ horn honking ] [ panting ] i focused on being prepared. [ gasp ] i saved your life by bringing you here. i knew this day would come. [ alarm sounding ] it's not safe out there. [ scream ] [ gasp ] something's coming. [ erie music ] defirst deodorant activated by movement.'s as you move, fragrance capsules burst to release extra freshness all day. motionsense. protection to keep you moving. degree.it won't let you down. noor a wall of mountains.s. nothing would get between him and what he was after. some called him obsessed. we call him mister coors.

>> trevor: roy. >> not the media. >> trevor: you know? >> black people. >> trevor: that's right, roy. black people are to blame, and not just any black people, but black film makers. it's time for black film makers to rise up and admit that they know the only way to win best picture is by pandering to white oscar voters. >> yeah, that's right. we know the rules. if we want to win an oscar we have to make a movie about black people being oppressed. i called out these past nominees and you tell me what's the first thing that comes to mind. jay. >> angry slave. >> "selma." >> still angry about the slavery thing. >> "12 years a slave." >> trevor: i mean, slave for 12 years. >> exactly. white people love feeling bad about how they treated black people, so to make a hit black movie you need a whip, a firehose or a negro spiritual. >> trevor: ( bleep ). you know what, this is so true. now they think about it the only black prominent person who got nominated today was weeknd for the "50 shades of grey" song which, of course, basically a movie abo

>> trevor: please welcome ben stiller! ( cheers and applause ) >> trevor: oh!hank you. >> trevor: this is you. >> it's nice to be here with you. and congratulations on your new job. >> trevor: thank you very much. i appreciate it, man. >> are you enjoying it? >> trevor: yeah, yeah, it's good. it's tiring but it's good. not as tiring as your schedule. i have seen you everywhere. you did an amazing catwalk thung in new york city. >> in sydney, we did it on the sydney harbor bridge, derek zoolander did the highest catwalk ever. >> trevor: you say it like it's not you. >> no, no, it was derek. and then derek and hansel were in the store window at valentino and rome as human mannequins. that's owen wilson and myself as derek and hansel. >> trevor: this was such an epic story. you know what i wonder. do you think there are countries out there that watch the movies -- because i've seen movies get dubbed into other languages -- and they think you're a real model. like, they could think this was a story of models doing their thing. >> probably in very underdeveloped cou

[cheers and applause] >> trevor: hey. >> hey. trevor: what's up, hannibal. >> how you doing? look good. healthy . >> i'm not healthy at. announcer: i have been trying to get healthy the last few years. i'm turning 3 p year. >> trevor: you serious? >> yes. no i'm not in good shape. >> trevor: halfy before birthday. p p is young. you look healthy. what do you mean you're not healthy. >> on sunday i laughed hard and my body cramped in three places. and it was a cramp over here and two over here. so i was trying to stretch them out. they were on opposite sides. they were aggravating each other i was a sea saw of destruction, it was bad. sucks. >> trevor: cramping at thirty-two. road life? >> road life, irresponsibility, poor eating, drinking. everything. i need to take a daily vitamin probably. i need to get back off my ex-girlfriend. >> trevor: i like you have narrowed it down. >> yes. trevor: down to the key things. >> i know the things i have to do. i don't do them. >> trevor: that's everyone. health, life. you have to work out, eat well. you know the things we don't do them.

>> trevor: no. a glamorous movie star and an incredible inventer as well and during world war ii she felt compelled to help the war effort, so together with a composer in hollywood they invented a technology which the government refused to use and they dismissed her because she was a glamorous movie star but it later became the basis for wi-fi and bluetooth technology. >> trevor: insane. yeah. (applause) >> trevor: it's funny you say she was dismissed. you had a bit of a tumultuous start. when in school, your teachers would say things like, you're very pretty but you don't act like a woman. >> i they told me i had terrible posture, i shuffled my feet. they told me i did well for someone with no natural ability. you don't forget these things. it's seared in your brain ever. >> trevor: wow... do you ever go back in a really nice car and go, like, oh, i was in the neighborhood -- oh, did i drop a few million dollars? do they ever say anything to you now. >> no. and actually the mere sight of the buildi

i'm trevor noah.nk you so much, everybody. our guest tonight here is talk about her new hbo show "vinyl," olivia wilde, everybody. (applause) but let's get right into it. we all saw what happened last night and i'm not going to lie, it blew my mind it blew my mind to think that that guy wants to be president. i mean between his ego, his devicive, purposefully inflammatory statements, it's insane that he still has supporters. honestly, i don't know what to say at this point. i just-- i mean i don't know what america is going to do about kayne west. (laughter) bill cosby innocent? are you kidding me, kayne? ima let you finish but bill cosby is one of the least innocent people of all time. now this blew upjohn line last night. and everyone is rushing to judge kayne. but maybe we should wait until the facts are in, you know, maybe this was a publicity stunt or maybe he was just really tired or maybe his phone was hacked. but bill cosby. (laughter) while kayne was sleeping. or, or, and this is my personal

. >> trevor: welcome to the daily show, i'm trevor noah. thank you so much, everybody. we have a great show for you tonight. democratic new jersey senator corey booker is here. (applause). >> trevor: and he is going to tell us how to unite america. timely! but first, man, it feels so good to be back. because we have been gone for a week and while we were gone, look at all the [bleep] that happened? the supreme court justice died, ted cruz made an ad with a porn star. apple joined isis, and those are stories that don't even involve donald trump. because in one week alone, donald trump fought with the pope, blamed george bush for 9/11, and then he said he would stop terrorism by shooting muslims with bullets dipped in pig's blood. for real. this is what he said. and then finally, finally, last saturday, south carolina voters were like stop. we had heard enough. you should be our president. >> record voter turnout lifted trump to a big win in saturday's south carolina primary. he beat marco rubio by 11 points, ted cruz was a very close third.

(cheers and applause). >> trevor: welcome to "the daily show," i'm trevor noah. thank you very much, everybody. our ges tonight is the founder and c.e.o. of airbnb, brian chesky is here. (applause) and he's only here for three nights for $550. if you have used airbnb you know technology is changing everything. and nowhere faster than in robotics. today an american company named boston dynamics revealed an exciting new robot called atlas. basically this robot can walk around on two legs, pick up boxes. it can do everything that you would normally pay a teenager to do. only without showing up to work three hours late in a hot box honda civic, right? and the demo videos of these robots is really fan task tuck and interesting to watch. and then it gets weird. >> thanks, guy, thanks, yeah, here i what, worried that robots were developing so quickly they wouldn't have time to resent us. yeah, yeah. that robot just came online five seconds ago and this is how we introduce it to humanity. beep boop beep, are you my father, i love-- wo, o-w-- daddy, why are you-- o-w. you

>> trevor: disappointment, my >> trevor: disappointment, my ash, we'll be right back.fx:(sfx: (crunch)walla) ♪ ♪i need a hero. ♪i'm holding out for a hero til the end of the night,♪ ♪he's gotta be strong, ♪and he's gotta be fast and he's got to be fresh from the fight.♪ sfx:(chip crunches, explosion and sizzle) ♪i need a hero. ♪horses) ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ latches onto youry finger so hard, it's like she's saying i love you. that's why aveeno's oat formula is designed for your baby's sensitive skin. aveeno®. naturally beautiful babies. (cheers and applause) >> trevor: welcome back to "the daily show." now, before the break, we were chatting about how the republicans are fighting over which vote makes you less of a pussy. if you just joined, google republican pussy. now, it's a little bit different on the democrat side because democrats are fighting over something completely different, which vote is friendlier to vaginas. women are a key group in their primary, and this election, equal pay, maternity leave and planned parenthood funding are huge issues. at first, you'd think the i

trevor, i cannot let guys like this get away, not in this climate. >> trevor: but you get susan sarandon'sen shouldn't vote with their vaginas. >> trevor, what else will i vote with? that's right, these things aren't just made for popping out babies, they're like third hands. i know guys can pea standing up but big (bleep) deal, i can pull a lever with this bad bitch! rr! >> trevor: i get it, you're annoyed people keep dragging gender into this? >> thank you for catching up. the sexism is annoying but it is so diminishing of women to accuse other women of supporting hillary because she's a woman. i worship beyonce because we're both super hot and we both should get our nighs insured. >> trevor: so you agree with the hillary supporters? >> no, both sides are straight-up booty now because it's diminishing for women to tell other women they're obligated to vote for hillary because, you know, we all have vaginas. we as women need to remember we all want one thing and it's michelle obama's arms. but also, seriously, we want the freedom to vote for who we want to regardless of what our husbands

is the "daily show" with trevor noah. and applause] >> trevor: welcome to the "daily show." i'm trevor noah. thank you so much, everyone. our guest tonight founder of girls who code reshma saujani is here, everybody. [cheers and applause] >> trevor: i know a lot of you are closely monitoring the results from the iowa caucuses right now. thank you for taking time from martin o'malley's surprise victory party to watch the show. i appreciate it we will get into iowa later. have full coverage of the caucuses tomorrow. first, i want to take a moment to talk about danger, people. because danger is all around us. whether it's a zombie apocalypse or mythical things like global warming. and now a new threat is in town. the zika virus. you know the zika virus is a lot like soccer. a mild cuter in the u.s. but it's [beep] in brazil. [laughing] >> worth health experts call it a rapidly rising crisis. a estimated forty two hundred babies born with small heads and no brains. >> there is no treatment. >> rash and red eyes. president: wh

comedy central >> trevor: welcome! welcome to "the daily show"! i am trevor noah! thank you so much. tonight we have a performance from an amazing soul band. the suffers are here, everybody! (cheers and applause) but first, the results are now in from new hampshire's primary, and we don't know what they are because we record this show at 6:00, but the winners are -- bernie and trump! unless i'm wrong. (laughter) you wanted to clap but you weren't sure if it was bernie or trump. it's, i'm going to -- wait! which one is my clap going to? (laughter) the big question is how did the candidates spend time in the state? by pandering to new hampshire's number one cultural institution. if you want to win new hampshire you have to make it rain in the dunkin'. >> hillary clinton making a stop at manchester dunkin' donuts. >> with rubio here in new hampshire, his wife and children looking for a snack. >> we're going to dunkin' donuts. >> according to boston.com hillary clinton spent nearly $1,900 in dunk danger. >> jeb bush just over $400, bernie sanders in third at $230. >> d

♪ (cheers and applause) >> trevor: welcome to "the daily show"! i'm trevor noah!nk you so much, everybody! our guest tonight, really special guest, former director of the c.i.a., michael hayden, everybody! (cheers and applause) we have a really big show tonight so i want to get into the big story. the tech contrivecy on everybody's mind, facebook. they've added five new options for the "like" button, people. (laughter) it makes sense. my friend would say, my cat died, so i click "like." but i don't actually "like" that the cat died. they say, watt kind of monster with you? i said, it's my only option! they say, go to hell! i say, i will go to hell and i will probably run into your cat there because it was a dick and now it's dead! what i'm saying is it's nice to have options, i like that, thank you, facebook. anyway, i'm glad you have a solution to our most difficult tech problem, but now let's move on to the second most difficult tech problem. >> showdown between apple and the federal government. >> a judge is ordering apple to help the f.b.i. break into a cell p

>> trevor: do the models in the movie get the layers? >> there aren't really that many layers. >> trevor: when people come. you make a lot of fun of the models-- >> i think so.

oh, but i bet trevor put 'em up to it. who's trevor? we met when ionic siege launched last year. couple weeks ago, i said i wanted to switch sides, and trevor got so mad, he dumped me. a guy dumped you over a game? he acted like i cheated on him or something. sounds prey controlling. ugh. he started out so sweet. i thought he was different. okay, so do you want to file a complaint? no, i... i just want to go home, okay? wh-where's my purse? you didn't have a purse when we found you. wait, so my keys are gone? how am i supposed to get into my apartment? if you have a super, we can take you home, and they can let you in, change the locks if you want. i should. (stammers) trevor never gave me his key back. sorry, we're closed. not for us. i'm not seeing marty dustin anywhere. looks like he's celebrating. marty. oh. (sniffs) why are you so happy, mr. dustin? we killed again tonight. did he actually just say that? he just said that. what's gng on? well, someone killed last night, too. (sniffs) brent madison, in fact. i didn't mean "killed" like that. well, since you threatened him a f

let's go chat with trevor. trevor powell. got a few questions for you, tough guy. i ain't holding nothing, okay? shut up. (grunts) a new york city cop was killed lasnight. that has my partner and i in a pretty bad mood. give him a toss. we're looking for joey fabrizio. who? joey fabrizio. you got collared selling drugs to the guy. it doesn't ring a bell. but you're holding something, hmm? what's this? son of a bitch. would you look at that? funny, but joey fabrizio's wanted in connection for a jewelry store robbery. stuff similar to this. how much heroin does a rock like that buy you, trevor? i don't know where they... hey! shut your mouth. i'm gonna give you two choices: you're gonna give me an address where i could find joey, or i'm gonna stick this down your lying thro, you understand me? good. start talking. i want this guy alive. two more. come on, go. (rattling) h! hey! hold up! he's on the run! (officers shouting) hold it, joey! officer: ...somebody cover the windows! subject exited a window onto the alley. officer: freeze! put your hands in the air and drop

to "the daily show" i'm trevor noah.[cheers and applause] >> trevor: but let's move on. last night we got so caught up in the iowa caucus we forgot to celebrate, groundhog day. ya. also, what the hell is groundhog day. [laughing] >> trevor: people pull a rodent out of the ground. then ask the animal to predict the weather. you know, this is so unfair. because if africans were doing this [beep], and you heard that we pulled animals out of the ground -- i mean there are villages in africa where people wear animal skin. if i tried to explain americans used ground hog to predict the weather. they would be like, why not

i'm trevor noah! thank you so much! great show for you tonight! netflix comedy "love," gillian jacobs is here, everybody! (cheers and applause) >> trevor: and -- wow, what a weekend this was, for me, especi

i'm trevor noah! thank you so much! great show for you tonight! is here, everybody! (cheers and applause) >> trevor: and -- wow, what a weekend this was, for me, especially. i got to visit new hampshire for the first time. yeah, which was incredibly white. (laugh

noah. >> trevor: welcome to the daily show, i'm trevor noah. you tonight. democratic new jersey senator corey booker is here. (applause). >> trevor: and he is going to tell us how to unite america. timely! but first, man, it feels so good to be back. because we have been gone for a week and while we were gone, look at all the [bleep] that happened? the supreme court justice died, ted cruz made an ad with a porn star. apple joined isis, and those are stories that don't even involve donald trump. because in one week alone, donald trump fought with the

hope something trevor needed to get through the transplant last june. anonymous 30-year-old man rewhich was give ton trevor. he spent a month in isolate. when he got out. >> woe. >> woe. >> i mean, i have been in a corridor for 30 some days. i for got there was whole worl out there. now back home. trevor spends a lot of time here hen us who family because they are trying to protect the immune testimony but still throughout fighting. >> well, i wrote the last part of the story. it ends with epic battlele at children's hospital. marrow man anemia identifying it out over a gowning girl. marrow man, the girl that he is trying to infect and anchor. >> am anchor hope, hope. >> the kids are going through bone marrow transplant or something like that. and it gives them hope. >> the harrises ho end to meet the bone marrow donor in union. that is the one year anniversary. if formed a nonprofit hoping to raise money to print more marrow man posters and alcohol meant battling a bloodies order to have a poster and comic in. another fox medical team reporting. >> all

(trevor noah, host, the daily show) "why do you "ahhhh" it's a robot?" (jeanne moos, new york) "actually there is a perfectly good reason for this robot abuse."when most robots fall they often have to be carried off for repair.but when the new atlas was forced to faceplant.watch it get back on its feet.and though it stumbles through the snow like bigfoot, it never loses its balance on the uneven terrain. that's a very big deal. even if one commenter noted "looks like me coming home from the bar last night."(jeanne moos, new york) "lest you think the engineers are just brutal bullies lacking any sense of humor."this was last year's christmas greeting from boston dynamics. even if their robots aren't laughing all the way. jeanne moos cnn new york 3 (ad lib) time/temp ...the hashtag, my family in four words is trending this morning ...so that's what we want you to share with us on the local12 facebook page.plus ...soaking in suds ...a look inside the nation's first spa offering baths ... in beer.that's ahead at five on good morning break four3 3 the hashtag