trevor noah, welcome to hardtalk. thank you, zeinab. were born in 1984, six years before nelson mandela was released. your father is a white swiss man, your mother was black, a union punishable by five years in prison. how did it feel to be born a crime? well, the truth is for me it didn't feel any different to being born i guess any differently, because i was really lucky in that i was insulated as a child, so i grew up under apartheid but i was spared from a lot of the ills of apartheid. my parents were in a world where they were the ones who faced the ills, that's what i talk about in the book, i don't make it seem like it was my struggle, it's a struggle i didn't even know i was part of, essentially, and by the time i became aware of it i was lucky enough south africa abolished apartheid laws and then we very rapidly moved into democracy. you just published your book called born a crime: stories from a south african childhood. you've just said now that you were insulated from that but at the beginning your mother actually hid you fr

it is. >> no, believe me, we're going to still bring it. >> trevor. >> that is too high a bar, trevor noahwn way, more sex, can i say that. >> trevor: more sex. you don't know, than the trump presidency. he has a few executive orders to sign, you never know. one of them could be more sex. >> he'll read it like more sex. >> trevor: more sex. >> more sex. >> trevor: what i did find particularly intriguing in the story is you know, the role that your character plays, she is in many ways, like she reminded me, in some ways of hillary's story. you have this woman, her husband is president and then you know, he has a tumultuous time with the press and he has all of these illicit stories following him around. and then she becomes this force in politics. she rises up and she goes i'm going to run for president. like that story, in parallel with what hillary was doing was pretty inspirational. was that something that connected with you on a personal level? >> well, you know, here's-- here's what-- how that makes me feel. and i have this feeling, frequently, there are-- there were especially in the

www.captionmax.com comedy central news headquarters in new york, this is "the daily show" with trevor noah. (cheers and applause). >> trevor: welcome to the daily show, i'm trevor noah. thank you so much, everyone. thank you to you for tuning in. i am so excited, my guest tonight is a u.s. ambassador to the united nations, samantha power is joining us, everybody. (cheers and applause). >> trevor: samantha power in the house, well, powerful now until friday then it will be samantha out of power. but that's another thing. but let's begin tonight with a major protest if spain. >> during the unveiling of a donald trump statue at wexford museum in madrid a bare-breasted activist from the feminist group femen protest. the slogan in english suggested patriarchy should be grabbed by the again i tales. >> grab by the balls. (cheers and applause). >> trevor: there are times when i don't know if i'm happy or sad about a trump presidency. cuz this is one of those where you are like more protests but now they're topless? seems like a weird thing, you know. it's like a boob protest. and by the way, by t

timmy ♪ >> from comedy central's world news headquarters in new york, this is "the daily show" with trevor noah show"! i'm trevor noah! thank you to you for tuning in! i could not be more ecstatic. my guest tonight from the new mini-series about nelson mandela, "madiba," lawrence fishburne is here, everybody! ( cheers and applause ) let's begin the show with news from across the pond. >> the british supreme court ruling that the u.k. cannot leave the european union without first getting a vote from parliament. >> this is a big deal. as most calls into question whether brexit will happen. >> if questions throws the united kingdom's exit from the e.u. into some chaos. >> trevor: hold up. there's a chance the u.k. may not have to leave the e.u.? no. i'm sorry. you do not get out of brexit. you do not, no. because brexit inspired everybody else to screw up their own countries! people running around burning down (bleep) chanting brexit brexit brexit! america elected mr. brexit! now you will try to breezle out of it? no! britain's, like, oh, we didn't realize we had a backdoor. no, redidn't realize -

applause] >> from comedy central's world news headquarters in new york, this is "the daily show" with trevor noah! ( cheers and applause ) ♪ >> trevor: welcome to "the daily show"! i'm trevor noah! thank you for tuning in! we have two great guests tonight, a political reporter and co-creator of "embeds," scott conroy is joining us, and from the new movie "split" james mcavoy is in the studio! ( cheers and applause ) we have a fun show for you. let's get straight into it. so today is officially president obama's last day if office. ( audience reacts ) and i can tell you the marine helicopter that's going to carry him off tomorrow better have extra juice in it because people are not ready to let him go. we coming for you, barry! we have no idea what trump's inauguration will be like but we know he's personally been hard at work on it. >> yesterday trump tweeted a photo of himself quoting writing my inaugural address at the winter white house mar-a-lago. looking forward to friday. >> it's appears trump is writing the first page of his speech with a sharpie, what appears a brand-new legal pad. >> one

. >> from comedy central's world news headquarters in new york, this is "the daily show" with trevor noah! ( cheers and applause ) ♪ >> trevor: welcome to "the daily show"! i'm trevor noah! thank you so much, everyone, for tuning in. my guest tonight a wonderful actor and former "the daily show" correspondent aasif mandvi is here, everybody, joining us, here to talk about the new netflix series, "lemony snicket's a series of unfortunate events." speaking of unfortunate events -- >> a recently deceased politician's final wishes were honored with a lavish funeral procession that included of all things pole dancers. 50 exotic dancers performed on top of multi-colored vehicles for the procession for tunk hsiang, a former city council speaker in taiwan. the politician described his wishes to family in the final days before he died. ( laughter ) >> trevor: just can you look at that? looks like the opening scene for the porn version of "la la land." ( laughter ) like, what is that? i will say this, you've got to give those pole bearers credit. it's not easy to twerk to amazing grace. this is a f

i'm trevor noah.y guest tonight, co-founder and president of lyft, john zimmer is here joining us! ( cheers and applause ) everyone is getting a free ride! ( cheers and applause ) terms and conditions apply. ( laughter ) but first, breaking news from the world of fashion. >> a shoe company recalling a boot because the boots leave what looks like a nazi symbol, a swastika on the ground. the company polar fox says it's an innocent mistake and only found out about the problem when somebody posted this photo online. ( laughter ) >> trevor: man... if you thought it was embarrassing walking around with toilet paper stuck to your shoe, imagine tracking swastikas everywhere. is that you? oh, no, no, it's not. ( laughter ) by the way, it's 2017, so it's not acceptable to sell nazi boots. you have to call them alt footwear. that's how it works. how much would it suck to get kicked in the face with those. not only would it hurt, but everyone could think you were the nazi. no, they kicked me! but if these boots a

www.captionmax.com >> from comedy central's world news headquarters in new york, this is "the daily show" with trevor noah! ( cheers and applause ) ♪ >> trevor: welcome to "the daily show"! i'm trevor noah! thank you so much, everybody and thank you for tuning in. my guest tonight is president of planned parenthood, cecile richards is here, everybody, in the studio! ( cheers and applause ) but before we begin i have important late-breaking news to share. >> taco bell going nationwide with its newest creation a tocko shell made entirely out of fried chicken. the chain says the shell of the naked chicken chalupa is made of white seasoned chicken, the whole thing, inside lettuce, tomatoes, cheddar cheese, avocado and ranch sauce. >> trevor: okay, america, what (bleep)? ( laughter ) first of all, why is that a news alert? it's, like, news alert! and then it's food? like they made it seem like the taco shot four people! ( laughter ) but i'm sorry, this is how you know america has got too much food. you guys are putting food in a container made out of food. even the chick-fil-a is like, yo, i wanted you to eat

. >> from comedy central's world news headquarters in new york, this is "the daily show" with trevor noah. ( cheers and applause ) ♪ >> trevor: thank you so much! thank you so much! welcome, everybody! welcome back to you! welcome to "the daily show." i'm trevor noah. so excited. we're back from new year's break. tonight's guest from "saturday night live" weekend's update, michael che is here, everybody. ( cheers and applause ) first, happy new year. i'm not even into the swing of it yet. i've still got the tan. ( laughter ) i do. i have a tan. you can't tell, but i have a tan. i hope you guys had a great holiday. i had a fun time. i fulfilled a life-long dream. i got to travel to macchu pichu, which is fantastic. that was me hiking there. i bought that hat, yes. ( laughter ) you think you're cool until you're in the amazon sun, then you're, like, anything, put it on my head. ( laughter ) so i bought that and liked up. yina pichu is in the background. a lot of people can't make it to the top of macchu pichu because of fainting. people quit. so we almost got to the summit, and then my frie

www.captionmax.com >> from comedy central's world news headquarters in new york, this is "the daily show" with trevor noah. ( cheers and applause ) ♪ >> trevor: welcome to "the daily show"! i'm trevor noah! thank you so much for tuning in. my guests tonight, i could not be more honored, are the parents of trayvon martin, sybrina fulton and tracy martin are joining us. they've written a new book, it's called "rest in power," and we're going to discuss treyvon's life and death and the political movement it inspired. ( cheers and applause ) but first, let's get into tonight's show and the start of week two of the donald trump presidency. >> chaotic scenes erupting at airports around the world. >> protests all across the country. nceounce president trump's temporary ban on travelers from seven mostly muslim countries. >> lawyers descending on airports. >> chaos and confusion. >> is thi america we believe in? >> no! >> i>> trevor: do you understand how insane this is? people at the airport are pissed and not because they're at the airport. ( laughter ) welcome to trump's america. that's how bad the donald is.

. >> from comedy central's world news headquarters in new york, this is "the daily show" with trevor noah! ( cheers and applause ) ♪ >> trevor: welcome to "the daily show"! i'm trevor noah! thank you so much, everybody, and thank you for tuning in. i couldn't be more excited. we have a great guest tonight. rapper big sean is joining us, everybody! ( cheers and applause ) but first, you know how some people say america is a wealthy country? no. it's not. >> what you are about to see is not part of an action movie, it is a new way to fight fires. firefighters in dubai are using jet packs and jet skis to respond to waterside fires. jet skis help them to avoid traffic and water-if you would jet packs help responders hover near the scene and put the fires out. ( laughter ) >> trevor: that's how you know the price of oil is going back up. that's just excessive. awesome, but not something you would expect a professional fire department would do. it's something a rich spoiled kid would think of. that's really something. that's basically what dubai is, when you think about it, the veefa of places.

i'm trevor noah! i could not be more excited.y guest tonight from one of my favorite shows of all time keegan and peele, keegan-michael key is joining us! ( cheers and applause ) but first, good news for people who like religion with a side of fries. >> when pope francis looks outside the vatican he can see the golden arches. >> it's called the mcvatican because the fast food chain is opening in a church-owned building in the vatican just around from st. peter's square. >> trevor: that's right, mcdonald's opening at the vatican. i always took the pope as a burger king guy. based on his sense of style. makes a lot of sense when you think about it -- both the catholic church and mcdonald's have served billions, both make people feel really guilty about themselves, and both historically bad for children. so makes sense. ( audience reacts ) oh, too soon? too soon? ( applause ) but really, my favorite part about this whole story is finally the hamburglar can confess his sins! my son, the seventh commandment says thou shalt not burgle

. >> from comedy central's world news headquarters in new york, this is "the daily show" with trevor noah. ( cheers and applause ) ♪ >> trevor: welcome to "the daily show"! i'm trevor noah! thank you so much, everybody! thank you for coming out and tuning in. i'm so excited, my guest tonight the editor-in-chief of "national geographic," susan goldberg is joining us, everybody. it's a really fascinating article from "national geographic." you want the stay tuned from that. since she is from "national geographic," let's start with weekend news from somewhere americans only usually hear about on "national geographic." >> it is often said a good speech leads forever and on occasion of swearing in of ghana's new president akufo-addo, whole paragraphs of speeches from two new american presidents appeared to have found their way into his speech. >> it appears to have been lifted from bill clinton and george bush speeches. >> i ask you to be citizens. >> i ask you to be citizens. >> citizens, not speck starts. >> s.e.c. zits, not spectators. >> citizens, not subjects. >> citizens, not subjects. t

i'm trevor noah.y guest tonight, "new york magazine" writer and author of the new book "audacity." jonathan chait is joining us, an amazing writer. but let's get straight into it. last night, the first and last first black president of the united states, said good-bye to 20,000 of his closest friends. and you could tell obama of really the president of the the millennials. because his entire speech seemed like one giant subtweet. >> democracy does roar a basic sense of... when we sit back and blame the leaders we elect, without examining our own role in electing them. it falls to each of us to be those anxious, jealous guardians of our democracy. if something needs fixing, then lace up your shoes and do some organizing. if you're tired of arguing with strangers on the internet, try talking with one of them in real life. ( laughter ). >> trevor: okay, this guy has clearly never been catfished before. look i don't say this often, but i do not agree with the president. do not meet people that you've argu

central >> from comedy central's world news headquarters in new york, this is "the daily show" with trevor noah. ( cheers and applause ) >> trevor: welcome to "the daily show." i'm trevor noah. thank you so much, everybody. you guys are amazing. thank you for tuning in. my guest tonight, united arab emirates ambassador and author of a new book, "letters to a young muslim," omar safe ghobash is joining us, everybody. he's joining us in the studio to talk about his book. ( cheers and applause ) now, look, the year's just started and i don't know about you guys, but i spent all of today laughing about what happened to house republicans yesterday. i've just been walking around the office giggling. no, because, you have to humor me. not only did the public come after them for trying to gut the house ethics office, but even the party's leader threw them under the bus on twitter. and something i was thinking about last night is that what's crazy about this is republicans found out about donald trump's reply the same way we did, at the same time we did. like, you realize, we are all in this (bleep) tog

i'm trevor noah.snbc, joy reid is joining us inthe studio! ( cheers and applause ) it's official, people. it's finally happened. it took eleven long weeks, but it's finally here. i punched my tenth subway sandwich card at subway. free sub for t, no tomorrow. ( laughter ) i'm just joking, there obviously won't be tomorrow because today this happened -- >> preserve, protect and defend. >> preserve, protect and defend. >> the constitution of the united states. >> the constitution of the united states. >> so help me god. >> so help me god. >> congratulations, mr. president. ♪ >> trevor: no matter how many times you watch that, i don't think you will ever get used to it. it's like seeing your dad's dick. ( laughter ) it's like, i knew it was going to be there, but it still upsets me. one of the main things donald trump has promised is that he will drain the swamp. he said he will drain the swamp that is washington. when you look at his inauguration crowd compared to president obama's, you can see trump kep

women throughout american history and all the single ladies and inborn a crime, daily show host trevor noah remembers his childhood in apartheid era south africa. >> well, i was born at a time when in south africa, due to the laws of apartheid, my parents weren't allowed to be in any shape or form in contact with one another. i grew up during a time when we were governed by the laws of miscegenation as they were called. interracial relationshipswere for bin. the mixing of races were is forbidden so essentially , being born from my parents, a white swiss man and ablack woman from south africa , i was essentially born a crime. the very existence of me was something that was against the law. but what my parents had done was breaking the law and because of that, our lives were impacted in the way we could live as a family under those laws of apartheid. >> that's a look at some of this year's notable books according to national public radio. book tv has covered many of these authors. you can watch the full programs on our website, booktv.org >> . [inaudible conversation] good evening everyone, g

. >> sean: conan was not alone, late-night host seth meyers and trevor noah, they also joked about trump's concerns of the lives of them american citizens and also a dallas teacher. she is reportedly placed on leave after she did this in front of a classroom of students. watch this. >> die! >> sean: screaming die? shooting a water pistol at an image of donald trump, the president? joining us now, david clarke, larry elder. good to see you both. sheriff, what madonna said i thought seriously about blowing up the white house, then you've got the teacher. what is your reaction to that. is that not a terroristic threat. if i said that about obama we would probably be in big trouble? >> no doubt about it. i find nothing funny about lack people being slaughtered on the streets of chicago and i'm tired of these liberal -- poking fun at this as if there's anything to make a joke about. they would not be doing this if and were being slaughtered in the city of chicago. they wouldn't be doing it if muslims were being slaughtered. but they think it's okay with blacks because they don't need blacks rig

. >> no, it was you trevor noah, john legend, chrissie teigan and then, like -- oh, and by the way daveguys -- there's a photo of you three after the show. fantastic. [ applause ] and -- >> yeah. after that ph -- chris -- you know how chris is like incredibly insightful and, like, harsh? [ light laughter ] >> seth: his humor comes from a very insightful place. >> yeah, sometimes he'll point it right at you. so we take this picture and we then walk off to the side and someone says, "hey, neal, the photographers would like a picture of you by yourself," and chris looked at me and goes, "for the first time in your life." [ laughter ] >> seth: you -- when dave hosted "snl," absolute -- fantastic episode, which was the episode right after the election. >> yeah. >> seth: and you were there helping out that week. >> yes. >> seth: you and colin jost wrote a great sketch about the sort of election returns coming in and it slowly dawning on people what the outcome would be. >> yeah, that was a crazy week. that's another -- when you're friends with guys like chris, it is comforting because you see

to catch you on the npr show, your interview with terry gross and then on the daily shore with trevor noah. you made a couple of opinion -- pointses thought were good and i read your book you asked the question, think on page 22, whether its more ethical to eave a strict islamic system or a psychologically healthy islamic society. i wonder how you answered that. the wording was very powerful. >> i'm glad you picked up on that and a that pops in pie head every day. certain communities they folk sunday cust so much on the rid doing and the regulation of -- ritual and regulation of islam but behind the scene wes know that there are people having nervous breakdowns, committing suicide, taking all kinds of meditation, and it -- medication and occurred me that the prophet told us that the religion is a religion of ease. not minute to be difficult. think we made it difficult and in making it difficult we have become obsessive about the tiny little details that have nothing too with the bulk and core of the religion. and i just wonder ted whether maybe we wouldn't be able to find -- if our clerics

women throughout american history in all the single ladies and in board a crime, daily show host trevor noah remembers his childhood and apartheid era south africa. >> well, i was born at a time when in south africa, due to the laws of apartheid, my parents weren't allowed to be in any shape or form in contact with one another. i grew up during a time when we were governed by the laws of miscegenation as they were called, interracial relationships were forbidden. the mixingof races was forbidden so essentially , being born from my parents, a white swiss man and a black woman from south africa, i was essentially born a crime. the very existence of me was something that was against the law. what my parents had done was breaking the law and because of that, our lives were impacted in the way we could live as a family, under those laws of apartheid. >> that's a look at some of this year's notable books according to national public radio. book tv has covered many of these authors, you can watch the full program on our website, booktv.org. >> c-span: where history unfolds daily. in 1979 c-span was

on comedy central's "the daily show" with the fabulous trevor noah.ncoming trump administration and also the release of my new book ed it with my good friend, e.j. dionne entitled "we are the change we seek." it is obama's most speeches spanneding from state senator to commander in chief. up next, grammy-winning superstar jennifer holiday joins me live. healthy, free, the world before me, the long brown path before me leading wherever i choose. the east and the west are mine. the north and the south are mine. all seems beautiful to me. i love paying extra to file my state returns. i want my tax software to charge me at the last second. there is nothing i can do with an extra $50. said no one ever. file your taxes for free with credit karma tax. >>> we're going to do something incredible. it's going to be the make america great again celebration at the lincoln memorial on the 19th and that's going to be really fantastic. so i'll see you on january 19th, very importantly, at the lincoln memorial at 4:00. >>> jennifer holiday, the performer who starred a