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( cheers and applause ) folks, check your calendars, this sunday is father day. of course last year-- yeah, give it up for the dads. why not. >> jon: yes, i like that? >> stephen: of course, last year, because of the pandemic, a lot of people had to skip father's day. so this year, you're going to want to make up for that by forgetting to buy your dad two gifts. and what dad doesn't love to get a father's day card? the thing is, all greeting cards had to start somewhere. and the people who write them don't always nail it on the first try, which is why tonight, we're taking a look at some early efforts in our ongoing segment, "first drafts"! >> no, stupid! >> stephen: as always, with "first drafts" i need a volunteer from the audience. i saw you first, young lady. get up here. ( cheers and applause ) populariall right, there you go. right here,s madame. hey. >> hello. >> stephen: hi, lovely to see you. >> lovely to see you. hi. >> stephen: i would say this, this right here is the only good thing that came out of covid for me is all the time that we got to spend together. >> it was nice. >> stephen: i want to show the people-- it was nice. >> it was, it was very nice. >> stephen: very pleasant. you turned out to be good company. which is nice. >> you used to always say we should never work together. >> stephen: i did. i said what if we department like it? then what? >> worked out. >> stephen: worked out fine. you actually-- one of the things people may or may not remember we did the first five months of the show down in south carolina. >> yes. >> stephen: in a little room, like a little library by ourselves with cables coming through the window and a satellite truck on the lawn. and you-- or one of the two boys-- >> it was the boys first and madeleine. and when the kids left it was me. >> stephen: it was you, exactly. and you would be on a sa satell, like on a head phone, working the camera. >> man, the people that work for you are so sweet. they, like, laminated instructions if are me. ( laughter ). >> stephen: sure. they pinned them to your sleeve like a child going out into the snow. >> they did. and i would get in there and and put on the headset, "okay, i'm ready," you know. >> stephen: look at the back of the camera, see the second toggle from the left. see the red toggle? don't ever touch that. >> and then you had to crawl over the sofa to get anything. >> stephen: you shot some footage right before we left that little studio down there. that is-- that's a little bookshelf. >> that was the spy cam. >> stephen: that's the monitor so we could see ourselves. >> lap top-- there were, like, five lap tops that did the whole thing. >> stephen: that's the camera that i would talk into. that's the prompter. that's the tangle-- >> oh! the wires! >> stephen: the wires on the floor. >> how many times did i say, "can i just clear the wires?" >> stephen: "you cannot touch any wires they would say to you." and then you get to your station right there. that's where you would sit. >> i would sit right there. >> stephen: that was five months. >> it was crazy. >> stephen: thank you so much for doing that. ( cheers and applause ). >> it was fun. >> stephen: here's a glass of wine for you and a cocktail for me. you don't have to drink it. you can be a party pooper. ( cheers and applause ). >> okay! the. >> stephen: darling, you know how this works, right? yes. >> yes. >> stephen: thank you ( laughter ) actions speak louder than words. yes, i have in my hand a father's day card, a greeting card that was successful, and then after i read this one, you will hand me the one that was the first draft that was not good enough to be sold. >> this part has not changed. >> stephen: premise established. >> we have done this, like, six times now. >> stephen: it's the first time we have done it in front of an audience. >> stephen: that's true. here's an inspiring one: "happy father's day. no one could ever fill your shoes!" it's nice. a little dark, though. why are my shoes empty? ( laughter ) here's the first draft: "happy father's day. no one could ever fill your shoes, because no one would be caught dead in those crocs." ( applause ) >> true. throw away the crocs. >> stephen: do you have any plans for father's day for me? >> i think you requested to sleep late. >> stephen: that is true. that is true. that is all i want is-- all i want is unconsciousness. ( laughter ) this one says: "i don't know how i lucked out with such a sensitive, emotionally available dad. but i am grateful every day that you are you." >> oh! that's true. you are that, though. >> stephen: thank you, thank you very much. >> very sensitive? >> stephen: the first draft said: "i don't know how i lucked out with such a sensitive, emotionally available dad. but could you please cry less around my friends?" >> that's also true. >> stephen: that is. >> that's very true. ( cheers and applause ). >> stephen: frequently. especially our daughter will go, "are you going to cry?" >> yeah. >> stephen: i love a good cry. love a good cry. here's a nice one that says, "dad, you're a non-stop fun machine! happy father's day." but the first draft said: "dad, you're a non-stop fun machine! but we're both too old for these horsey rides. i'm going to slip a disc." ( laughter ) very nice. now, what about-- what about your father? you got anything for peter. >> yeah, you know what i got him? i can't say that because he might watch this. >> stephen: does your dad watch this? your mom watches. >> they watched monday night and both told me i did a good job. >> stephen: when you came out. >> very sweet. >> stephen: whisper. what are you going to get him? that's perfect. he's going to love that. can't tell you what it is, but peter magee, you're going to love it. this card says: "thank you for always giving me a hand to hold. happy father's day." that is truly sweet. >> our kids won't hold our hands anymore, hon. >> stephen: however, the first draft said: "thank you for always giving me a hand to hold. but, like, whose hands were those?" a little dark. it's a little dark. there was some conjecture in rehearsal as to whether i would cut that one, because it's a little dark. i'm glad i didn't. you have to have the salty with the sweet. here's a card that says: "d.a.d." and inside, the letters spell out "down to earth, awesome devilishly handsome." that's nice. every dad would want to get that, want to get that. but the first draft read: "d.a.d., dad, a dad. damn, what else starts with "d"?" ( laughter ) ( applause ) any of the children going to be around? >> i think peter. >> stephen: okay, one of them will be around, okay. no pressure. no pressure, buldy. you have to have all the love of all three of you right at me. ( laughter ) here's a nice one: "now that covid's over, i can reunite with my favorite guy, my dad!" >> oh! >> stephen: see, look at that. they're doing their part, too, out in the audience. >> they really are. >> stephen: but the first draft said: "now that covid's over, i can reunite with my favorite guy, mom's new boyfriend, chris! he lets me borrow his jet ski!" ( cheers and applause ) >> they could happen. >> stephen: it could happen? >> i mean not for us. >> stephen: it could happen? >> not for us. >> stephen: all right. >> i don't want a boyfriend on the side. >> stephen: you don't? >> i'm too old for that. >> stephen: where-- where do you have him? #-r ( laughter ) if not on the side. >> yes. >> stephen: hold on. family show. okay. here's another one: i can't believe we're all together again this year. happy father's day. i can't believe we're all together again this year. happy father's day. >> this is the last one, everybody. here we go. here's another one: "i can't believe we're all thanks so much for being here. >> thanks for having me. >> stephen: and thanks for doing these cards with me in that little storage room down in south carolina every holiday for 15 months. >> it was fun. >> stephen: yeah, and this is how we discovered it was okay to work together. yeah. i shouldn't have been afraid of you this whole time. >> maybe. >> stephen: we'll see, it's early, it's early days. this one says: "dad's you're a star. thanks for shining your light. happy father's day." but the first draft said: "dad, you're's star. i couldn't exist without you but you're mostly gas and impossible to get close to." evie magee, everybody! we'll be right back with anderson cooper. ♪♪ comforort in the e extreme. ♪ the lincololn family o of luluxury suvs.s. we'r're for thosose who love to disiscover. who knknow an openen mind isis the only y kind. whwho don't neneed to traval to f find someththing new. and whwho know when you s spend less,s, you u can discovover even mo. at t.j. mamaxx and mararshal. was s nacho cheeeese even a a r before dororitos? were trianangles even nmy psoriasisis. i was cocovered fromom head toto toe with h it. it r really hurtrt. ththen i startrted cosentytyx. okayay, thanks..... that was f four years s ago. how arare you? see me. cosentyx w works fast t to givu clear r skin that t can last.. real peoeople with p psoriasis look andnd feel betttter with cosenentyx. don't t use if youou're allergc to c cosentyx. befofore startining, get chehed fofor tubercululosis. an increreased risk k of infecs and lowerered abilityy to figight them mamay occur. tell your r doctor abobout an i infection o or symptomsms, if your r inflammatotory bowewel disease e symptoms develop oror worsen, oror if you'veve had a vacaccir plan to.o. serious alallergic reaeactions may occur.r. i lookok and feel l better. ask yourur dermatolologist if c cosentyx could hehelp you movove papast the paiain of p psoriasis.. at panerera, dinner is s hot... if c cosentyx could hehelp you movove and ready y to serve.. ordeder our warmrm and toasty sanandwiches for r din