who the hell believes in unicorns?thawed out to discover that america won the cold war. evil capitalists everywhere. sorry about that. p.s., you lost east germany, too. >> bob: yeah. i'm city trying to figure out what the -- i'll still trying to figure out what a unicorn is. >> bob: look at the picture up there. see, a unicorn. >> greg: some say it's -- >> bob: symbol for the sea seals? >> greg: unicorn is considered a mythical creature but it's a real creature. people saying it's mythical are part of a big coverup. >> bob: have you seen them before? >> greg: yes, i have. >> bob: do you talk to them? >> greg: they talk to me at night. >> eric: you have experice. did harry reid looked like he needed rehab? >> bob: he look tired. >> dana: harry is like i can't believe my staff wrote this for me andvy to read it on the floor of the united states. >> bob: put out a challenge at the table to come up with a millionaire that created a job. >> greg: what are you talk about? corporation. i could ask you. what foreperson hired a

go out and grab yours a unicorn of the day.

unicorn. pick unicorn. armadillo. pick armadillo. ok, everybody. settle down.happens to be a combination of a unicorn, which is magical, and an armadillo, which has a shell. magic turtle. that's a terrible mascot! there are so many reason why unicorns are better than magic turtles. i disagree with this decision, and here's why-- how do we know armadillos don't already have magical powers, huh? fine, but how do we know that unicorns don't also sometimes have a shell? but if they had a shell... narrator: and so with becky, scoops, and ms. davis debating the substitute mascot, we come to the end of another fantastic episode of "word girl"! and this is the bonus round of... "may i have word?" our returning champion will have a chance to play for even greater prizes on the bonus round! emily, you correctly defined the word shatter. you ready to play the bonus round? you bet! great! take a look at these 3 pictures and tell me which one shows the definition for shatter. give it a shot, emily. i'm gonna go with number one. mr. big's golf club has clearly shattered a ho

>> i prefer purple unicorns to gold unicorns. this is about the whole thing -- the democrats told him that they met with him at night. they said that is intriguing. the next night they laughed at him and told him, no way. i ran into senator kerry in the hospital. he wanted us to help us work on that. is that all we need is one trillion dollars in higher taxes. this right stuff is not going anywhere. all of the fantasy, the democrats were not part of. it was not uncool, but when you are off by yourself imagining what unicorns might look like but the democrats will not let you have a unicorn and old, is at the white house running a campaign of class hatred and envy and greed as his campaign slogan, he would not be cutting marginal tax rates at 28%. these hypothetical questions or they would agree to close -- so for some deal with that of the cool, i suppose that would be really cool. if we come back to planet earth, that is not an option. >> does that not just leave us into a pit of existential despair? then the salvation of americ

the reason why our findings were saw astounding was because it was thought that there was no trans unicorn being planted in mexico at all. and people wanted it that way the government the local communities the people who lived in the city they all wanted to have it that way that they would mean dog transgenic to mexico why because mexico is the center of origin of corn and they make mexican government was worried about montagne the integrity of the land races the national general fuss of so it was illegal to plant transgenic corn it is still illegal today.

the idea that we will not spend the money is a unicorn. >> the me ask you one other thought and that we'll to you. he referenced efforts and western europe and the conservatives and other parts of the world. is the plunge going global? is there any effort or consideration? >> you for is a lot of your remarks not between conservatives and liberals but between democrats and republicans. does that affect it to be utilized more broadly? >> two things. i put the pledge for work for anyone to use. i am happy when democrats make the commitment. if the democrat party was the party that will not raise your taxes, i would be working with them. it is not a partisan thing, is just one party wants to raise taxes and the other was to go in another direction. you cannot have compromise. we passed -- we, the republicans

this isn't rainbows and unicorns. i am super thankful for rainbows and unicorns.his is neuro science. perhaps it is a scientist who captures the spirit of gratitude the best. einstein said there are only two ways to live your life: one is as though nothing is a miracle. the other is as though everything is a miracle. in this holiday season, and beyond, let's recognize the miracles and, yes, the fact that your husband installed the christmas lights without electro cuting himself qualified as a miracle. i wish you a merry christmas and a grateful new year. >> good evening, everybody. >> yes, hello, everybody. happy holidays. it's sunday morning on cbs. and here again is charles osgood. >> osgood: albert brooks has a long record of playing movie roles for laughs. not in his newest role, however, and thereby hangs a tale. mo rocca has our subject profile. >> i want you to meet mister bernie rose. >> nice to meet you. >> my hands are all dirty. >> so are mine. >> reporter: albert brooks kills in his latest film, and not in the knock 'em dead funny kind of way. had you

was white with a purple unicorn on it second after recess the eraser was missing third notorious second grade bully bobby butcher did not go out for recess because his recess privileges have been revoked due to his indiscretions. i think the pieces are starting to fall together here but wait it gets better let's take a look at bobby the butcher's parents it appears that they have never once chaperoned a field trip wow so what we are dealing with your is a suspect with a past record of misdeeds and i am a parents an opportunity to commit the crime need i say more but there is more to race was found in bully bobby butcher's desk at a racer with a purple unicorn that's it right case closed well not so fast there is a twist in this story school officials lost the race or recovered from bully bobby butcher's desk fumbling this case and losing a key evidence that in billy bob the butcher go free in the process discussed i think all we can we can all look objective lay the facts of this case see the bully bobby butcher is guilty but the devil is dancing tonight because bobby is a fiery man and

one of them you know they're not realistic i just want my person well i mean if we all believed in unicorns that would also work but you know it just it just doesn't work and i want to work in the unicorn's reference ok so so if you have to work with a certain person though right let's say that you have it romney or newt gingrich and then you're trying to get people on the local level to please try to shift the conversation which i think ron paul has really greatly done even just with his presence at the debates this far then which one would it be you know i think that there are merits on both of them right so i mean newt gingrich is more likely to take on some harebrained kind of crazy scheme what the mainstream might thing. harebrained i'm crazy like. i don't know nothing is coming to mind immediately and i don't want to have a. brain lapse but you know newt gingrich might be more likely to grab something that libertarians might go you know this is great as a bit of romney congress or you could say the new gay marriage is the kind of guy that is very very stylish right here in washington

. >> are you going to be the hunter in >> you told on me you're going to be unicorn hunter.t's a kind of snake kind of hunt er japan. you ever seen them. it was a stupid idea. just the one. the japanese proverb says. my prompt cart. please listen. okay. go ahead. i go to where many harrons come to feed. i walled out to one of him in a loud voice like this. [yelling] hello mr. onin. what will the herring think? well i wonder what he wants. i understand he wants to capture me. well, what should i do. no. i can get away easy any time but i think silly man. i don't know this him and so just before he catches me. i can escape. this is going to be fun. i need to get closer to him and call word to him. hello mr. harold will think. i need to get closer and closer to the herring and call to him in this way. hello mr. herring. the herring will think. that is strange, if you want to catch me, why is he getting further away. i don't understand. do you under stand? actually i'm going to be getting closer and closer to the herring and i make my voice smaller and smaller, so the herring wi

. >> andrea: greg you are a sort of centar hybrid unicorn thing. the unicorn i'm happy with.take a break. coming up, should mitt romney call president obama a socialist? rush limbaugh thinks so. we'll tell you why. next. if you leave now i'll write nasty things about you on the internet. >> announcer: if you think identity theft is scary, just wait until you try to fix it. >> 58 different individuals are using... absolutely, using my old social security number. >> announcer: identity theft has topped the federal government's list of consumer complaints for the last eleven years. it's a serious problem with anyone with a social security number, and it continues to get worse. fact is, on your own, there are many things you can do to deter identity theft. protect your social security number. be internet savvy. use intricate passwords. safeguard your purse and wallet. shred and destroy. seriously, are you really going to do all that? or do you want someone to help protect you from identity theft? we're lifelock. we offer the most comprehensive identity theft service ever created.

harry reid may consider laying off the meth addicts, his claim that millionaire job creators and unicorns are a myth. >> what? >> that's right. ♪ >> announcer: if you think identity theft is scary, just wait until you try to fix it. >> 58 different individuals are using... absolutely, using my old social security number. >> announcer: identity theft has topped the federal government's list of consumer complaints for the last eleven years. it's a serious problem with anyone with a social security number, and it continues to get worse. fact is, on your own, there are many things you can do to deter identity theft. protect your social security number. be internet savvy. use intricate passwords. safeguard your purse and wallet. shred and destroy. seriously, are you really going to do all that? or do you want someone to help protect you from identity theft? we're lifelock. we offer the most comprehensive identity theft service ever created. we take proactive steps to deter identity theft, to help stop it before it happens. expanded alerts now include checking and savings account take over frau

. >> andrea: greg you are a sort of centar hybrid unicorn thing. the unicorn i'm happy with.take a break. coming up, should mitt romney call president obama a socialist? rush limbaugh thinks so. we'll tell you why. next. if you leave now i'll write nasty things about you on the internet. ♪ ♪ >> eric: conservative radio star rush limbaugh thinks president obama is a socialist and not afraid to say it. take a listen. >> he will not call obama a socialist. this is the conventional wisdom of the elite. you have don't criticize obama. i don't think you separate obama from the policies. you have can't separate obama from who and what he is. we have a belief that if you say you are a socialist, we don't want the hear that. they'll run back and we'll lose them. romney won't even call him sanezy! >> eric: shattering all rule of capitalist with the mar marxism. the massive redistribution of the wealth and obama. i'll tell you what mitt won't say. you can run, but you can't hide from your overplanned socialist america. >> greg: i was going to bob. >> bob: did you just read? >> eric: i w

harry reid may consider laying off the meth addicts, his claim that millionaire job creators and unicorns are a myth. >> what? >> that's right. ♪ ♪ [ woman ] ♪ what i want this season ♪ if you'd like to try and guess ♪ ♪ it is something very special ♪ i would readily confess [ dogs barking ] ♪ 'cause all i want this season ♪ ♪ is something from your heart ♪ la da da, la da da [ male announcer ] thinking of others this holiday season, travelers. on the 4g lte devices you love. like the droid bionic by motorola for $199.99. or the pantech breakout for $49.99. our lowest price ever. get the technology you love, on the network you deserve. and for a limited time, get twice the data for the same low price. verizon. ♪ >> all right. a new report bite "washington post" has some startling new figures about the wealth gap between americans and their representatives in congress. according to the report, the median net worth of house members grew 2 1/2 times over a 15-year period from $280,000 to $725,000. well, meanwhile over that same time period, 1984 to 2009, americans' wealth decreased from $20,

the reason why our findings were saw astounding was because it was thought that there was no trans unicorn being planted in mexico at all. and people wanted it that way the government the local communities the people who lived in the city they all wanted to have it that way that they would meet the transgenic to mexico wide because mexico is the center of origin of corn and they make mexican government was worried about montagne the integrity of the land raises the national general passive so it was illegal to plant transgenic corn it is still illegal today. these days german phones. it's essentially a very very large seed library and you see the collections are arranged like libraries show. there are twenty four thousand samples. unique samples of these seeds. most of this is landry's the varieties that were developed by farms and with thousands of years this selection. and they're quite diverse. these collections are also a source of useful traits for breeders who are looking for things like insect resistance drought tolerance grain quality all kinds of other characteristics and so somet

this show starts as soon as i stop thinking about unicorns. okay.e. ♪ ♪ >> greg: so i wanted last night's debate to get ugly. how ugly? really ugly. we're talking joy behar after an all-night bender ugly. no such luck. still, it served as cliff note for the campaign. mitt played it safe even his training wheels wore a helmet. smoother than a shorty robe made of gravy. ron paul proves again for everything sensible thing he says he ads something kookie. like opening steak topped with necco wafers. ron, it's 2011. you can't be an isolationist in crowded phone bull, especially if it's crowded with nuts holding handguns. then newt defend his profits claiming he was a private citizen back then. that is like a cop saying yeah, i punched you, but i was off-duty. who won? america. that is the last debate. but let's not forget it's a great one and this is how democracy works. all the candidates endured more scrutiny and is now better known to voters than the mystery man the dems put in the last edirection. can you seriously imagining in any other country? rus

a unicorn's queef. [laughter] keep up with out daily blog at comedy central.com/tosh.0, make sure you come see me on the tosh tour 2010, and follow me on twitter, so we can live chat during the shows. finally, the best part about having a job is talking about your co-workers behind their backs. that's why i had my fans tweet me all their office gossip in a new segment called "twispers." ryan writes, uh, "girl at corporate likes to meet and bang field managers at regional meetings." that had a lot of office jargon in it. it has to be real. >> devin says the girl in the cubical across from meadowsn't know her snatch shows twice a week. what she don't know won't hurd her. our office skank just -- that must be a mistake, because the worst-smelling taco at ponchero's still smells delicious. rob has been licking the tops of so day cans in the fridge at trader publishing. got you know, bastard. he got you, rob. >> and this guy is black, of course. he owes $10,000 in child support. just because that is really r

millionaire job creators are like unicorns. wild. >> democrats with an economic plan are like the loch ness monster. we don't see them often either. they should walk him off the floor of the senate and put him on a plane back home. >> they had these tax cuts for 12 years. alisyn: christopher hahn is making an interesting point. you are saying where are the jobs? >> here is my other point. the only thing that recase jobs in this country is demand. million airs don't need extra money. they are already rich. they have all the money they need to spend whatever they want. by putting money in working people's pockets you create demand in america. that's why we should be raising taxes on the rich and giving a payroll tax holiday to the middle class and working class in america. >> government spending will create jobs. and then the workers will fuel the economy. rich people -- i have people on my show today who are small business owners and we talked about this. we called in and they are not invisible, they are not unicorns, they actua

this isn't rainbows and unicorns. i am super thankful for rainbows and unicorns.ence. perhaps it is a scientist who captures the spirit of gratitude the best. einstein said there are only two ways to live your life: one is as though nothing is a miracle. the other is as though everything is a miracle. in this holiday season, and beyond, let's recognize the miracles and, yes, the fact that your husband installed the christmas lights without electro cuting himself qualified as a miracle. i wish you a merry christmas and a grateful new year. >> good evening, everybody. >> yes, hello, everybody. >> osgood: next, happy holidays. it's sunday morning on cbs. and here again is charles osgood. >> osgood: albert brooks has a long record of playing movie roles for laughs. not in his newest role, however, and thereby hangs a tale. mo rocca has our subject profile. >> i want you to meet mister bernie rose. >> nice to meet you. >> my hands are all dirty. >> so are mine. >> reporter: albert brooks kills in his latest film, and not in the knock 'em dead funny kind of way. had you

stuck with the bust there is no magical free market there are no fairies no secret green elves no unicorns no walk ness monster and more than likely no abominable snowman but there are real solutions solutions that have been tried in the past and it worked really well solutions like raising taxes on the rich putting regulations on the banks toure's setting trade tariffs weaving a strong social safety net and protecting the rights of workers to unionize and organize into labor unions basically none of the stuff you heard in the republican debate those are the real solutions we need and not the nonsense you hear spewed from republicans on a daily basis with the iowa caucus caucuses next week in the primary season just now getting underway expect a lot more republican insanity and a lot more crazy fairy tales from that bunch speed of crazy between anthony weiner donald trump and the talking heads the g.o.p. t.v.'s fox so-called news we've had a lot of fodder for our nightly crazy awards but none of the folks i just mentioned came out on top for craziest crazy alert of the year instead our vie

i was in i was investment banker i mean i have an economics degree and you know you can support unicorns too but doesn't make it real does it make it true supply side economics we saw it during the bush administration was a total failure where we were bleeding seven hundred fifty thousand jobs a month so it was so speaking speaking of the x.l. pipeline and its impact on the environment which i think is the biggest concern the at least environmental many progressives have this is the worst congress this republican congress has last year in the history of the united states according to the house committee on energy and commerce which is controlled by republicans one hundred ninety one different page now they're bragging about one hundred ninety one different occasions house republicans voted to do considerable damage to the planet including one hundred fourteen votes against the e.p.a. twenty seven votes to block any kind of action on climate change seventy seven votes to block any protections of clean air twenty eight votes to block any protections of clean water forty seven votes to bloc

it's a unicorn mini mill. it works pretty well. it's not bad.ttle carry bag, a little tote. >> it's adorable. >> it's cute. >> a cute stocking stuffer. >> 1933 they invented the mocha express. you put in water at the bottom, you put in about four level tablespoons of finely ground coffee. >> and you have your tablespoon nice and handy. >> very good. it makes two-ounce espressos. it really works. it's totally old fashioned, but it actually really works. takes about four minutes to make four cups. >> for about 28 bucks you can get this commuter travel mug. >> i'm always looking for the perfect one. i come in from connecticut and i wear it by the time i get here. >> she does. >> when you wear black, it will be fine. >> i want one that works. >> this with. two hours keeps your coffee hot. it fits in everything. some are too big. we tested these while driving. some are so big on top you can't see where you're going. we didn't crash. finally, our most expensive, the nuance, this is a wine finer aerator. if you open a bottle of red wine, you think you'

she is cuter than a baby panda riding a unicorn through candy land. i am here with lori rothman. and he is sharper than a hyperdermic needle. and his 401k is a sock filled with old bottle caps. it is bill schulz. and he knows finances like i know table dances. it is how i earn cash through dental school. sitting next to me, another fox business network reporter, adam shapiro. did i say that right? >> it used to be shapiro. it is now shapiro. >> anyway, his business is failing because readers are sailing. >> they came out to urge the u.s. to ease rules on marijuana. we all know what that means. ♪ party rockin. ♪ smote. ♪ in the house tonight. ♪ ♪ everybody just have a good time ♪ ♪ one more shot for us ♪ another round please fill up my cup ♪ ♪ every day i'm shufflin >> your eyes are really red. >> the walls are bleeding right now. >> one of the top rated shows in cable news i will have you know. i don't know how. joe frisco has a frown, and it is due to the clown. mcdonalds is deliciously skirting san francisco's ban on free toys in kids' meals pie charging 10 cents for folks who

. >> something happened on the unicorn.ey to everything. >> the globe hopping thrill ride stars billy elliot's jamie bell as tin tin, a young reporter who recovers a treasure lost at sea centuries ago. >> i was bulled over by the way it looks, which is insane. >> determined to beat him to that treasure is ivan ivanovich played by daniel craig. >> i will find it, with or without your help. >> the movie is based on a series of children's books well known to readers in europe. daniel is a big fan. >> i remember reading them and being so excited about the adventures. >> joining tin tin is the guy we know as gollum from the lord of the rings. >> saved from above! >> the adventures of tin tin is spielberg's first motion animation. >> i've been able to do things in the medium of animation which i could never do in live action. >> the director's other new movie "war horse" hits theaters on christmas day. >> i was devoted to doing tin tin and i had an affair with "war horse." >> this is packed with action from the first frame to the

was five years old my christmas list to santa, i wanted easy bake oven, pony and just like greg a unicorn. get a load of this. tom cruise's daughter has $130,000 christmas list. now, at first i was like my gosh, that is ridiculous. i thought is this in context? >> kimberly: it's weird. it looks just like my list. pony, diamond earrings, gown and toys. perfect. but mine is not $130,000. yeah, bob -- >> bob: why do you assume i'm going to -- >> greg: because you go there. >> kimberly: it's extravagant. >> bob: see how my ex-wife feels about $13,000 at christmas time. i paid most of it. sorry, if you're watching. >> dana: think you're part of the 1%? >> bob: no, it was a credit card bill. this is the kind of thing, i think tom cruise has nod had the best publicity. if he wanted to do one thing, didn't want out there, it would be this, right? >> dana: in a way it's in context. i would never bet a certain amount of money that somebody like matt damon, might bet in a poker game, because i don't have -- it's all relative. >> greg: by the way, we have no idea if the gifts were for her. seri is on