or should i say ghoul to have you with us ascareica! nation, i love... thank you. nation, i love halloween. every year i sit on my porch with a big bowl of candy and a rake and i tell the kids if they want a treat they have to work for it. no free rides, a rapunzel. oh, and cut your hair, hippy. (laughter) folks, every year i am appalled by the latest debasing costumes for women. like sexy pirate, sexy bunny or sexy ketchup. (laughter) oh, it's okay to sell this but when i hold her upside down and whack her on the bottom i'm the one who gets tased! come on! (cheers and applause) costume makers, how dare you single out women for this kind of objectification. especially when we guys would love to get slutty. come on! what am i hitting the gym for if my franken sometime costume only shows off my bolts and not my nuts. i say it's high time to close this objectification gap. so next year i want to see skanky hazmat workers, kinky taxidermists, randy chewbacca... (laughter) and my personal favorite, naughty pundit. (cheers and applause) also available in the george will.