wilcox talks about a retreat from marriage and a cohabitation revolution following on the heels of the divorce revolution and the earlier generation, and people say divorce rates have stabilized but that may be because fewer people are even attempting marriage in the first place. so, on the one hand we have this is great for people. oregon we have got people are retreating from it and it's not just in marriage itself that we see this sort of crisis in relationships between men and women. there's been research for my book, and i'm going to talk about in a minute, i read an awful lot of people, just in popular culture, writing articles in books about relationships, and it's pretty clear that there is a crisis out there. it's like the modern relationship has hit a wall. a few years ago the atlantic magazine was advising women to settle for a guy that they couldn't really get excited about. last year the atlantic sort of even went a step further with all the single ladies, saying there aren't any good guys out there. just give up and resign yourself to being sing for the rest of your life.