probably for you -- cancer surgery, you lost your mother, book came out, written from interviews with william casey while he was dying in the hospital. and there you were, you had just come out of surgery, how did you cope with all of that and what lay ahead? >> as i look back on it, i don't know, i just don't know. betty rollins wrote a book, i don't know if you know or not, betty rollins wrote a book called,''first you cry'', and i'd had, ronnie and i had never made any secret about as a matter of fact -- doctor's daughter talking. when he had his colon cancer, when he had his his prostate cancer, when he was shot, we were very open about what happened. and we did, they say, encourage people to go in for exams for their colon or prostate, and in my case breast. now i had heard about betty rollins's book, but i hadn't read it, i didn't have any reason, i didn't think, to read it. but when i had my surgery and i came home, and three days later my mother died. and my mother and i were very close. it was very hard, i hadn't had time to adjust to the surgery. i never had time to grieve for my mother.