everything you guys say you did, everything you guys think that you done did, we did it.t's really just about us not scolding the kids. it's not a scared straight. but we try to give you the communication part like, look, man, this is what i did. and this is what it got me. like this is the trophy that i was trying to earn. is this what you want to earn? and most kids, they don't. do you want to come to jail at 15 years old? do you want to come to prison and have to be on the yard? stand up. let me see how tall you are. this was me. >> you was my size? >> this was me when i came to prison. they're 15 and they look at me like oh, my god, are you serious? that's usually what i get, like are you serious? 15 years old they locked you up. can they do that? >> at 15, monroe's involvement in gang violence changed his life forever. >> they say you have a gun, you carry a gun, eventually you're going to use it, and it did happen. we was just with a girl having fun, talking. i seen somebody walking by. we had a confrontation and i asked him a few questions about his gang affiliatio

let me tell you why i think you are funny today. you allowed your comedy to evolve as you evolve. it used to be how you couldn't get a day, and now how your private parts are falling. why is my bunny slipper so gray. >> i was sexually harassed i thought, but he was looking at my shoes. if you are not current, you become a grand old comedian. things happen right away. you start talking. like snooki, thank you, god. when she became pregnant. >> she is a gift, isn't she? the pregnancy, too. >> the gift that keeps on giving. my first line was, i said even rick santorum said time for an abortion. but some you can't say. i get through everything with comic. everything. >> i know. that's what i love about you. >> it's worked for me. when whitney houston died, terribly sad. i have one joke i cannot -- >> please tell it. >> i have not said it out loud yet. it's too soon. i said i saw whitney at the grammys and she looked beautiful. she was in mahogany from head-to-toe. it's a great joke six months from now. six months from now. >> not appropriate right now on this show. no, no, no. >> not

you can't handle it! >> hey, ladies. how are you? nice to see you.bi kristina's interview on oprah. how did that play out? >> i thought she did beautifully. i was surprised. i thought that she was going to be kind of dopey, like a typical teenager, but she was very composed, very articulate. i thought, you know what, you raised a terrific daughter, whitney. >> right. any surprises that -- >> i'm surprised by some of the things that did not come up. of course this was taped earlier before the news broke about bobbi kristina possibly wanting to change her name from brown to houston. but i wanted to hear something about that. i wanted to hear about ray j and they didn't go there. i wanted to hear about the altercation at the nightclub where there was a fight allegedly over ray j. even though say said whitney houston sent her apologies and she no longer blamed the funeral home, i want to know who they thought took the pictures. >> it sounds like a deal was made, they would have access. i'm speculating. if you don't raise these kinds of subjects because i

you did when you were 22?i probably when i was younger i thought there was some sort of way of approaching things that i had to refine where now i'm kind of believe that you always have to start from zero and invent the process and invent the approach appropriate to each role, each film because each time it's different. your job is different. >> rose: do you still have the same passion to get -- >> yes, more. >> rose: do you really. >> oh yeah. >> i do too. because i'm less worried than i used to be. you know. when you're a kid, you're worried about making things stick and you're worried about career things. now, yeah, i have my worries don't get me wrong, i'm not totally cool but i can be more reckless and i can follow, i know myself a little bit better. >> rose: that makes directing him much easier too doesn't it? >> this is the third time, do you know what i mean. so it -- you know, the point is he knows how to make films. starting from being in the theatre and he knows how scenes work and how they play out

you got it? do you understand? >> yes, mom! okay! >> love you. i love that he asked that. my mom doesn't hang up on me, ever. my mom says --- i call my mom and she says a story and then she goes, "all right, bye. um -- quickly -- what are you guys watching on tv tonight?" or something like that and i go, "i don't know, whatever." and just say -- but she, "okay, all right, bye. oh, wait -- and --" and i go, "you know, i'm just gonna hang up the phone on you." >> but do you tell her about music and books to read and stuff like that? 'cause that's what i'm really understanding now. that's really the reason you have children. >> jimmy: yeah, i don't tell her about -- my mom reads more than i do. i got her a kindle and i don't know where that's hidden in the house. but she has no idea what that is. she thinks it's a remote control. [ laughter ] >> i like to touch books. >> jimmy: yeah. >> i wanna touch them. i wanna smell them. i don't want them on kindle. >> jimmy: she likes to go to the library and stuff like that so i just figured -- this, you don'

and you won't do nothing about it, you understand? you understand me? >> yes. >> i can't hear you. yes. >> all right, guys. hurry up, let's go. >> it's not often you see the inmates working together toward a common cause once the kids were brought in that unit you could tell that everyone was there to put the fear in them. >> give me them sneakers! >> come on in here. >> while the three younger boys seemed shaken at times, 16-year-old damon pope maintained his nonchalant attitude. >> can you tell me what time? >> what did i tell you i don't care how much you paid you're in jail. you're in jail. welcome to jail. your back to the wall. >> we followed the kids up to one of the housing units to see where one of their next bedrooms could be if they continued on this path and i think that was probably one of the scariest parts for the kids, idea of being locked up in a cell. >> get in there, welcome home. there is only two beds, you have to share beds. have a seat, make yourself comfortable. that is where you're going to be. >> you want to cut people. >> you want to cut people. >> they c

however, if you have a cut on your hand you have a path for infection to get inside of you and you want a pair of latex gloves -- several pairs of glo gloves that you can put on and change as you go from patient t patient hopefully and at least wash your hands and disinfect your hands between patient contacts and the eyes are like an open wound and path to get into your body and glasses and take the old glasses and throw them in your kit and you have something to wear and face mask and of course dust and dirt and all of these disasters throw up dust and dirt and especially in a dryer season and push comes t shove a band da bandana. and after a disaster is not the time to let your hygiene slip and it's a time to tighten it u and communitycable diseases and if it's wet and not yours don't touch it. gloves and every patient contac and don't touch blood and it's good rule to live by. hepatitis a and sal min nillia and geria and assumed to be in the fresh water in california and you get enough of the parasites in you and you will b in the bathroom for weeks and you won't be happy about it an

you know? that progress, as you go., first of all. >> thank you. >> jimmy: and this is serious stuff. i mean, this is the sort of thing that -- you're walking in the same hallowed floors as master p. and steve guttenberg before you. are you excited about it? >> i am. i'm equally nervous. equally excited. not a dancer at all. >> jimmy: oh. okay. >> i just came back from the promo shoot. they're like, maria, dance on the stage. this is weird. >> jimmy: it is weird, right? that's the part that makes me the most uncomfortable. is when they put the camera on the people and they're like, dance for your intro. it's terrible. >> you have no idea. >> jimmy: derek hough is your dance partner. >> he's waiting for me at rehearsal right now. >> jimmy: he is? already? >> sorry, derek. jimmy called. i have to go. >> jimmy: derek's won, like, three times. >> yeah, pressure. >> jimmy: he's a good partner to have. but don't look too deeply into his eyes. you'll fall right in love. >> i know. he's very handsome. >> jimmy: he is handsome.

you need to let it go. >> you [ bleep ]. >> what's wrong with you? >> the holman correctional facility in atmore, alabama, is home to close to 1,000 inmates, all of whom are categorized by their behavior. the best behaved are housed in holman's coveted honor dorm. but inmates who behave badly are sent to the administrative segregation unit. >> segregation is an area where we house roughly 200 inmates, and all these inmates are individually celled and they are all here because they broke a rule infraction here in prison. >> human contact in segregation is extremely limited. and interaction with others is at a minimum. this deprivation can take its toll on an inmate both physically and mentally. >> you've got a lot of inmates back there that have been in single cells for a long time. and they, of course, build up hostilities. it's a highly explosive area. >> i did not do what they said i did. >> [ bleep ]. [ bleep ]. >> another typical day in ad seg. that's part of it. >> these officers work here and on a daily basis they deal with these inmates and yo

you know, you kind of make do that when you have-- you know, you got your two ears. do you ever wonder how was it that someone can make a sound over here and you know it's there or here and you know it's there? how do you know? how do you know where the sound is coming from? how many people have never wondered about things like this before? [laughter] okay. well, we're wondering about it now, yeah? huh? it's kinda neat. you know what happens when the sound is made over here, guess which ear it gets to first? right. this one and then this one. so what i have inside here, is that compute-- computer computer, okay? and what i do is that-- there. okay. so-- there, okay? you do that with stereo. yeah, you really do it. you adjust, so that you-- you know, where you get all fouled up is when you do it under the water, under the water. do you ever played tag with your friends clicking rocks together? how many people have never done that with they're friends, click rocks together under the water? okay. you know what you gonna do this weekend out of the bay, huh? and you click

it's nice to meet you. i'll see you later. yes. see you later. to be a nurse, and working part-time. she's kind of wild. well, here we are-- this is your room. it's a little dusty. oh, it'll be fine. it's very charming. oh, what a nice view. the bed looks comfortable. rebecca, can we talk? this is very difficult for me to say. you know i wanted to let you stay here rent free... yes, i appreciate... no, please... listen. this is extremely difficult for me. i'm afraid... i'll need to ask you for some rent money to help pay the house expenses. i feel bad about this. i've tried everything... but if i can't pay my bills, i'll have to sell the house. that would be terrible. the cost of the retirement home is unbelievable-- much more than we expected. i understand. i wish i could help you a little more. i mean, you are my goddaughter, for heaven's sake! i understand. i want to pay my share. i want to contribute. how much are you thinking of? can you manage... $250 a month? tell me if you can't afford that much. no, it'll be fine. $250. are you sure? i'm

you know when you get back from a trip and there's just so much stuff you got to take care of that yout weren't planning on. >> should we take care of a big piece of business on our today show family? >> only on the four hours of the "today" show will you experience this as well. >>> we just talked about a marriage that's falling apart and now we have marriage that's just beginning. our girl, bobbie thomas! >> oh, my gosh. i was nervous before. >> we love you! >> congrats. >> tell us about it. >> his name is michael. we know that. >> yes. and i am so nervous right now. >> the crew is heartbroken. they're devastated. >> there is mashing of teeth. it's tough. >> he's already threatened to beat them up for me. >> they don't like the fact you have not brought him around around they have not been able to pass muster with him. they want to judge him. >> i think i want to throw up right now. i'm just -- it's always been sort of a little nice secret to have, as you both now, outside of the show. and so michael, you're amazing. i love you very much. i'm so nervous. i don't know why i'm talking

someone gives you an atom, you take some tweezers, you put it under the microscope and you look at it and you get, oh, what's it gonna look like? begin with "n" end with thing. nothing, right? now you take another microscope and put it on the top of that microscope, get 40 microscopes, get on top of a ladder. every microscope--look down, ooh, what do you see? nothing. then someone says what's the atom look like? and you say, got no looks. atom got no looks. how can atom have no looks? it turn out that atom have no looks because it's smaller than the wavelength of light, that which you look at it with, huh? smaller than the wavelength of light. let me show you what i mean. let's suppose we have a tank, a tank of water here. and all i have here is i have like maybe a rock. there's a rock and a tank and over here i have some sort of detector and over here i take a meter stick and i go flip, flip, flip, flip, flip and i make waves and the waves travel. here's the waves like this. when the waves hit the rocks, can you see the rock disturbs the waves? with this detector, which consists of a

have you ever had a gut feeling? were you there? were you there? were you there? >> i'm asking you because you're the one who's saying you know in your heart that george zimmerman was in a life-or-death situation, and i'm saying that we don't know. i'm saying that we have to wait till the investigation is finished. and you are saying that you know that there was george zimmerman. you said on television that you know that that was george zimmerman's voice crying out for help, and you have only known george for six years, and you have only seen imin social situations. his mother told me that she is absolutely 100% sure that that is her son, and she has known that boy for 17 years. she has heard him cry many times from a child all the way up to 17. she is saying -- are you saying that you know george zimmerman's voice better than trayvon's mother knows his voice? >> i'm saying, as lawrence has pointed out, i've had numerous conversations with george. because now -- >> have you ever heard george zimmerman scream? >> you know what? what is the point of you asking me qu

has broken up with you and you say i want to be there when someone does to you what you did to me. that's this song. it's called "a lesson in leaving." it's country, so let's go. ♪ ready, here it goes. crank it up, guys. ♪ the only thing changes is my way of thinking ♪ >> here it goes. ♪ somebody is going to give you a lesson ♪ >> i know this song. all right. >> you've got the hear it. >> i've heard it! >> here it comes. ♪ >> don't you love it when an egyptian sings a country song? >> jerry! >> we love it. that is a great song. a very good song, hoda. once in a while you just surprise me, baby. >> okay or not okay. is it okay to forbid your kids from getting tattoos when you have one? kathie lee says it just makes sense to discourage your child from doing something you personally regret. they don't need another friend. they need a parent. >> where do i come up with this? hoda says yes, it is okay. don't forget the old saying, do as i say, not as i do. >> exactly. >> i guess we agree, but i'm more poetic. >> okay. sara, clear up the confusion on the what the what picture. >> i love

if you change your mind once you get home you can adjust it.ber bed's going to provide it for you. at our semi-annual sleep sale, save $400 to $700 on our most popular bed sets. sale ends march 31st. only at the sleep number store, where queen mattresses start at just $699. >>> two very quick things with my guest mike tyson. the wwe in miami, you're being inducted into the hall of fame. >> chop chopper dude. >> breaking news, you're trending worldwide on twitter thanks to this interview. i have made you a world champion again. >> thank you. i have been called worse. >> very quickly, mike, only in america special. only in america could a british cable news host take on a fighter. the odds are 175.5 million to 1. approximately. i'm talking about the whole of america is talking about, mega millions. $540 million jackpot. >> nonstop. nonstop for two weeks. >> i bought only one ticket. that's all i need. >> good luck to you. >> thank you. >> mike tyson, you lost they say half a billion dollars. this is your chance to win it back. but here's the thin

thank you buddy. >> thank you. >> jimmy: you rock buddy. thank you very much. all right, thank you rhymewave. all right, we've got one more emcee. come on over, majesty. ♪ now, your name is majesty. >> my name is tim. rap name is majesty. >> jimmy: oh! earlier when i said "what was your name," you said majesty. >> sorry, jimmy. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: i didn't mean to yell at you, buddy. yeah, yeah. >> we're all right. >> jimmy: yeah, all right. we're good, all right. sorry. [ laughter ] you got real deep, man. like right at my soul, there. >> i'm so sorry. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: oh, my gosh, he's deep. [ laughter ] all right. rhymewave, can you give majesty a person, place, and thing, please. >> calculating. [ computer noises ] [ laughter ] >> jimmy: yep. ♪ >> cee-lo green, san francisco, newspaper. >> jimmy: okay. very good. your three words -- cee-lo green. you know who he is. of course, yep. right? >> i've seen him before. >> jimmy: yep. "voice," san francisco, rice-a-roni. got some good stuff there, golden gates. newspaper. there's a thing of the past kids

if you change your mind once you get home you can adjust it. you feel like, the sleep number bed's going to provide it for you. at our semi-annual sleep sale, save $400 to $700 on our most popular bed sets. sale ends march 31st. only at the sleep number store, where queen mattresses start at just $699. >>> do you need police, fire, or medical? >> maybe both. i'm not sure. there's just someone screaming outside. [ screams ] >> so you think he's yelling "help"? >> yes. >> okay, what is your -- >> there's gunshots. >> you just heard gunshots? >> yes. >> how many? >> just one. >> the chilling 911 call is the shooting of trayvon martin was taking place. back with me now is robert zimmerman. his brother, george, killed trayvon martin. who was screaming there, robert? >> that's my brother. >> how can you be so sure? because trayvon's family are equally adamant it is their boy. >> you know, that's a very sensitive thing to talk about. i don't blame them for being as equally adamant, i don't blame anybody whose family member, they believe or perceive th

you looked over at you and you were like -- you were making sounds, hoda. i'm sorry. you were making sounds. >> i'll let you know who is going to enjoy this play. if you liked this book, "50 shades of gray," it's like 50 shades with the dominant and the submissive and the whole pornish thing happening. all i could think of when watching this was it is like reading "50 shades of gray." >> which you have, cover to cover. i have yet to open the book. that's all you need to know about it, frankly. hoda likes porn. i think it's basically bad for people. >> stop. it does tip into icky. in the book and in the play. >> on page what, hoda? >> in the play. it goes dark. it goes to a very dark place. >> it's fascinating. i appreciated it from the acting standpoint. these are two -- >> they're great actors. >> at the top of their game. >>> can i cheer people up with something else? >> what's more cheerful than porn and sadomasochism? >> for my "ihoda" this week, here's the deal. before we show this, this is -- lionel richie's been doing these duets with country stars. shania twai

[ cheers and applause ] they love you. >> jimmy: they love you. >> they love you. >> jimmy: you came own the space, jimmy. you got to own the space. >> jimmy: i don't know what that means at all. last time i saw you, buddy, we were at "snl." >> that was fun. >> jimmy: and that was fun. we did a -- we were in the monologue with lindsay lohan. >> little walk on. >> jimmy: we did a little walk on. >> a little surprise. >> jimmy: yeah, you didn't have to walk. >> i didn't. i did a sit on. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: you were just sitting and they cut to you, yeah. but you've been -- man, you've been busy. >> busy. >> jimmy: congratulations, good stuff. >> it's a good problems. you know? it's a good kind of busy. >> jimmy: yeah, you got -- well, you also had the kardashian thing. that was not good problems. >> well, it's not really a problem, is it? >> jimmy: no, it's not. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] that's the way to look at it. you're right. "mad men" getting early great reviews. "friends with kids" -- we had your girlfriend, jennifer westfeldt, on. and she produced, wrote, directed

like if low bars you like if old hymns you like ♪ ♪ if bare limbs you like if mae west you like or meone mad today and good's bad today and black's white today and day's night today ♪ ♪ when most guys today that women prize today are just silly gigolos ♪ ♪ and though i'm not a great romancer i know that you're bound to answer when i propose ♪ ♪ anything goes

i'm going to show you to you.e whole season so when i'm guessing these, he knows i'm right. watch this. i predict casey b. will be in your final four. she seems nice. i predict lindzi c. will be in your final four. >> okay. >>. >> jimmy: she's the one who came in on the horse. i predict nicky will be in your final four. and i predict the evil courtney will be in your final four. >> the evil courtney. >> jimmy: and who knows, maybe you even picked courtney. who nos, maybe she tried to stab you in your sleep. [ laughter ] how about that? that's not bad, right? [ applause ] i have mixed emotions about it. i picked all four bachelor finalists. i have never won an ncaa basketball pool here. did you see the look on his face there? let's show the end of that in slow -- this one in slow motion too. who knows, maybe you even pick courtney. who knows, maybe she tries to stab you in your sleep. [ laughter ] >> who knows. >> jimmy: i don't know. not only did he pick courtney, i think she might actually have tried to stab him.

thank you. very much. >> you have left us -- you do what you can and you do it beautifully. erskine does, we do and there isn't a soul in your audience that can't do something instead of just sitting back and saying this thing is, i don't know where we are head headed, you can go to your congressman's next town meeting and when he or she gets up and babbles into the stray pours, that they are going, i have vapors, waste fraud and abuse foreign aid, so and so, forget it .. say sir or madam what are you going to do with medicare and healthcare first, and then medicaid and then the solvency, not the cutting of social security, the solvency? and defense? which is just real life. just use, just figures we check our figures all the time. are we right what we tell the american people? and we are right. we don't have to be listened to, but for god's sake there isn't a soul that can't get off their butt and do something to make america better and forget that you are a member of the republicans or the democrats or the tea party or the afc afl-cio you are citizens first and if you have

like if low bars you like if old hymns you like ♪ ♪ if bare limbs you like if mae west you like or me ♪ ♪ the world has gone mad today and good's bad today and black's white today and day's night today ♪ ♪ when most guys today that women prize today are just silly gigolos ♪ ♪ and though i'm not a great romancer i know that you're bound to answer when i propose ♪ ♪ anything goes anything anything anything anything goes ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: woo-hoo! that's the way to do it. oh my gosh. thank you so much. thanks, everybody. you can see "anything goes" at the stephen sondheim theatre on broadway! and they brought copies of their cd for everyone in the audience right now! ♪ check out latenightwithjimmyfallon.com for more information and ticket details. sutton foster and the cast of "anything goes," everybody! [ cheers and applause ] phenomenal. my thanks to william shatner, padma lakshmi, andrew rannells, josh gad, sutton foster, the cast of "anything goes" and the greatest band in late night, the roots, right there, everybody! [ cheers and applause ] stay tuned for "carson

that's what i told you. you think i lie to you? jimmy: okay, good. >> so, they next animals i want to bring out, we're going to start the easter extravaganza. and this guy -- >> jimmy: easter extravaganza. >> egg-travaganza. and these guys hatched out of eggs. look at these. look at them, they're so cute, look. [ audience aws ] jimmy, with a bunch of chicks. >> jimmy: you said you had a bunch of hot chicks coming. >> don't let them go off, you got to coral them. don't let them go off the table. put your arms around them. kind of coral them if they're going to go anywhere. now -- [ laughter ] >> jimmy: why me? why don't you -- >> yeah, 'cause i got to talk about them. i can't concentrate on two things at once. >> jimmy: wow, these guys are so cute. >> they came from my buddy jim works are clyde's, a feed store, and i was like, "dude, i need some chicks," and he's like, "all right dude." and brought me six -- yeah, it's awesome. look it -- >> jimmy: could have gave you john edwards number. >> no, look it, they love this stuff. look a

you go out there and you win this thing, and when you get home, she'll have to go out with you. blue hair -- >> how many hours of makeup were you under, stanley tucci. >> it took a while. >> i understand you had not read the books at the time. but then you read the one book. >> right. i read the one book, yes. i was in london making a film and gary offered me the role. >> he's the director. >> he's the director. sorry, gary ross. gary ross. and my fiance who's a literary agent said -- i said, you know, i got offered this thing, "the hunger" -- didn't even finish the sentence. she said do it. i read it and it's very doable. >> it's just had a phenomenal first week opening. >> it is incredible. >> i think it's interesting, too, that it appeals to people our age and these young kids and it really runs the gamut, doesn't it? >> yeah. >> tell us about it. i know kath loved it. i have yet to see it. tell us about it. >> it is a really great movie and a very good adaptation. sometimes you read a book and wish they hadn't actually made the movie. >> a lot of people who loved the book sa

the view today is, you tell me if i'm wrong, you talk and you take the pill; that right? >> most of the studies show the best effect is a combination of psychotherapy or talk and the medication. i happen to think medication plays the biggest role. on the other hand, we are symbolic creatures. we talk. we use language and want to express how we feel. it's important. that's not as sufficient once people have the biological problems where they can't sleep and they don't want to eat, things like. that then they need the medications. >> so you think the medication is more efficacious than the talk? >> for certain people, yes. >> for certain people? >> yes. >> what about averages? >> i still think in most depressions, they're biological and the medication is the most important component of it. >> do you think that we only have seen the tip of the iceberg of pharmocological farm so psychological -- farm mow psychological medicine? >> i do we are only dealing with four or five neurotransmitters and we have 40 or 50. >> you don't have the chemicals for those? >> no. >> but they're

you know a guy. >> jimmy: you can't buy this, can you?s delivered to my house. the guy says, you know, i don't deliver to many houses. >> jimmy: i would think you would get on a no-fly list. if you ordered something like this. >> this is 321 degrees below zero. so, you must never do that. you really should never, ever do this. >> jimmy: why are you doing it? >> i want to see if you're a man. >> jimmy: no, i'm not. no. >> okay. we established something here. >> jimmy: okay, good, all right. >> we have cooked some hamburgers. >> jimmy: that's for people who don't know. this is not that hot. but pretty hot. >> this is 132 degrees, roughly. >> jimmy: how long did you cook this beef? >> 25 minutes. to hold it for a longer period of time. that's perfectly medium rare. but it looks gray and yucky. you wouldn't want to eat a burger like that. >> jimmy: right. >> we want to make the outside super crisp. but we don't want to have gray meat. we want to have it medium rare or crisp and nothing in the middle. pick up the burger. this one here. >> jimm

guys, you know, show you my etchings.ver, baby, i'll show you my nugget. it's not the same. >> guys say i'll show you my etchings? >> you never heard that? >> no. i'll show you my etchings? >> yes. how old am i? >> what are etchings? >> that used to be the come-on. i'll show you my etchings. >> it did? that's weird. okay. anyhoo, it is booze day tuesday, and this wine is significant. because we've taken a test, a quiz, to find out exactly what type of wine is best match for our taste. >> this is called -- i think it's an online wine club. for wine or something. >> they asked us how do we like our coffee. do we like it with cream, cream and sugar, whatever. and they put that into the thing. salt and citrus, berries, mushrooms. >> i tonight like any of those things in my wine. they cooked up something for us, and we've actually been drinking it for three days. >> i know. >> never had a chance to get to it. >> i apparently have -- >> a citrus palate, which implies you like lighter flavors rather than oaky. >> let's try it. >

. >> thank you so much. thank you, everybody. thank you so much.appy valentine's day, and good afternoon, san francisco. [applause] i am so honored and thrilled to be part of today's celebration. we're going to have a great time as we salute a living legend today. it was 50 years ago, high atop noob -- nob hill in the venetian hotel that tony bennett sang a song for the first time, a song that would become a worldwide and the mind forever with our city. i'm talking about, of course, "i left my heart in san francisco." and what better way to celebrate valentine's day then with a tribute to the most famous love song ever dedicated to our home town by our city's most beloved troubadour, mr. tony bennett? [applause] and now, everyone, please join the san francisco symphony and our chief of protocol, charlotte schulz, here on stage in welcoming our host, mayor edwin m. lee and first lady anita lee, and the man of the our, our special guest, mr. tony bennett. [applause] -- the man of the our -- the man of the hour, our special guest, mr. tony bennett. [a

and so, you can't -- where as you would get sued for advertising if you did it commercially, you are protected in many, many ways to a much greater level in politics. this is frustrating to us, also, because just, you know, we want everybody to rely on the truth. but it doesn't always happen. and it's rare -- the media is, or the other campaign, are the most likely to call them to task for being untrue. there's nothing else to prevent it. >> and the last question? >> in terms of saying that you're with nobody, if you are researching for the opposition, aren't you really with somebody? >> well, we are, that's where our reports go. and our reports go to democrats. so, we do work for democrats. and we have worked for some republicans in elections, primaries when there was no democrat, because we won't do that. go ahead. >> i was just going to ask, how do you wind up with this candidate versus that? are they choosing you, are they searching you out? >> the political universe is very small. you tend to work with the same people over and over again. work with the same pollsters, work with

the answers came back, you, dave, you. you small businessman. you mr. america, you mrs.u the veteran. thank you for what you did. but all those things it just seemed to me to come across as a lot warmer. >>> madam secretary, you have been in politics a long long time. >> public service. government. >> maybe i should say you have been in government. but politics leads to government whether we like it or not. one of those indiana teunintend consequences. you asked tough questions of these guys. tell me, did you get the answers you were looking for, did they answer your questions or did they give you a talking point. >> no, i agree totally with dave. i think they gave very sincere answers. they clearly care deeply about our country and are troubled by the path we are currently on. we hear the same themes, we are uncompetitive in the international arena with our uncompetitive tax rate. we have an overwhelming burden of regulations, government regulations on our employers. they feel the uncertainty. they feel the burden and they are not creating jobs. thirdly, our national de

why you go-- you don't get helium. all the helium atoms are going so fast, they're going at escape speed. they escape the earth. and what helium there is in the very, very top, it's all gone. it goes out. the helium you get in your balloons, that comes from under the ground when they' mining gas, they get helium in there too. later on, we're gonna learn about where that helium comes from. it comes from the radioactive decay of elements like uranium and radium. that's what it is, that's the alpha particles. so next time you see a kid walking down the street with a helium-filled balloon, say, "hey, radioactive decay waste." true or false? ends out true. that's right. that's what it is. yeah, alpha particles, slowed down. yeah. - yeah, really? - yeah, really. yeah. it turns out whenhat warm air rises-- and it rises, by the way, because--i didn't mention that. it rises because it's in migrations. every time it happens to be going down, does it see a lot of atoms or a little bit? a lot to bounce off. when it happens to be g

do you like movies? do you like parties? do you like me? if you answered no to all those questions, go to sleep right now. i have something 23r you to see, a sneak preview of "project x." >> and it has him in it. >> jimmy: i was hinting at the fact that i make a cameo in the movie. >> you, too? >> jimmy: are you in the movie? >> si. let me show you. ♪ >> would you guys get off my dad's car. >> yeah. >> dicky: "project x," in theaters march 2nd. >> jimmy: "jimmy kimmel live" coming up with justin theroux, >> jimmy: "jimmy kimmel live" coming up with justin theroux, die antwoord and mchale. ♪ can you feel it out there? ♪ ♪ you gotta lift yourself up ♪ ♪ that's right [ male announcer ] join the masters of style... even trimming, a close shave, and accurate edging... with the new gillette fusion proglide styler. ♪ [ male announcer ] new fusion proglide styler and clear shave gel from gillette. we tweet from here while we are on the road. we just be on our blackberry, yo, we're playing this, we're playing that. keeping our fans up to date. we ha

you had an arranged marriage 13 years ago but you quibble with that. don't you? meet. but if you don't like him, you don't have to marry him, is that right? >> there's different ways to describe an arranged marriage. sometimes you're not even told the person. that certainly didn't happen. she mitt him and said i think you two will get on. i was like, if you like him, there's no way on earth i'm going to like him. we just met. >> how did things develop? >> we just got on. we were friend for a -- friends for about four to six months. and then we dated for two years. >> see, i personally i'm quite a fan of this arranged marriage system. i really am. the reason is, so many marriages now, i see people i know are utterly unsuitable. you think why did this happen? how did this person meet somebody so obviously badly suited? actually, in the purest way, what is wrong with families coming together and saying we think these two people with similar backgrounds and interests and intelligence, whatever it may be, they might just get on. what do you think? >> if you let me tal

tavis: but you did not. how'd you know when you pick something that might work?hat is it about a song, for you, that makes you want to cover it? >> usually, the lyrics. because i still think people, you know, gravitate toward the lyrics first. usually it is the lyrics. if i feel like it is something i can translate properly, or something that is personal to me, then i feel like i can pull it off, because i will fill it while i am sending it. tavis: -- feel it while i am singing it. tavis: you have to be able to pull it off and give it your treatment. is there a song you have been dying to cover your whole career? what is on here that you really wanted to do? >> i wanted to do "signed, sealed, delivered" by stevie wonder. but it is not on there. you cannot do that. tavis: is there something on here that did make it? [laughter] that you really wanted to do? >> the first song when there was "creep" by radiohead. we have been doing that on tour for a couple of years. that was easy. we did that in two hours. a metallic a cover on there, one of the best written songs i

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no, you don't eat around it. >> you ate the one i gave you earlier today. >> you thought it was delicious. >> i want to make one point quickly. if it is struck down it can help obama. they are largely against this. if it is voted down, then -- it is less of a voting issue for them. there are people who want to support the president, but they are against the health care law. they have to question whether or not voting them back in there is no chance of it getting repealed. >> the fact that there are people against the health care law they are for obama. if you are against health care you probably don't like obama. i don't understand the whole thing about preexisting conditions. they want a plan that covers the pre preexisting condition. what is the point of having health insurance? that means you can just wait until i get sick. that is a preexisting condition and then i get insurance. i am not going to get insurance from my car until it crashes. doesn't it negate the whole thing? >> that's the deception of the whole thing. they are making people who are young and healthy who only need cata

you texted me, you called me. one of the few people who really reached out and was actually concerned. >> well, you've always been very thoughtful to me. nick canon, good to see him back on track. >>> coming up, what would jesus do? controversial pastor mark driscoll just got married. start. protect your family... and launch your dreams. at legalzoom.com, we put the law on your side. your hair mixes with pollen and dust in the air. i get congested. my eyes itch. i have to banish you to the garden. but now, with zyrtec-d®, i have the proven allergy relief of zyrtec®, plus a powerful decongestant. ♪ i can breath freer with zyrtec-d®. so i'll race you to our favorite chair. i might even let you win. zyrtec-d® lets me breath easier, so i can love the air. [ male announcer ] zyrtec-d®. behind the pharmacy counter. no prescription needed. aflac! ha! isn't major medical enough? huh! no! who's gonna help cover the holes in their plans? aflac! quack! like medical bills they don't pay for? aflac! or help pay the mortgage? q

you in 1966, you went to mexico on a vacation. you met a doctor.g, horrible story short, he took you back to a motel room and at gun point he raped you. and he made you pregnant. and you then had to have an illegal abortion which nearly killed you. a real life defining moment, i would imagine. tell me about that experience and tell me how much of a motivating factor that's been in turning you into this crusading campaigning woman, particularly for issues like abortion rights and so on. >> well, most women, including myself, are feminists because of their own life experiences. in other words, i never had a women's studies class, i wish i had. but i'm a person would strongly believes in fighting against violence against women and the right to choose legal and safe and available abortions because of my own life experience. and because i had trouble collecting child support. i think there should be better child support laws to make it easier for the single moms to support their children so they don't have to go on welfare. yes, it's my own life experie

>> jimmy: you look good, you look good, you really do.u age. >> i look like you. >> jimmy: no, you look better than me. >> we're both drinking a lot of water. keeping the calories low. >> jimmy: that's right. >> doing a lot of cardio. >> jimmy: i wanted to mention something. you have a new thing. you tweeted this. you tweeted, attention all barbers, introducing the diddy part. >> yeah. >> jimmy: that was not the diddy part i expected to see on the internet. can we see it live and in person here? >> live, right here. in all actuality, it's a part called a half-moon out of new york. out of brooklyn and queens. brooklyn in the house. queens in the house. >> brooklyn. >> brooklyn. >> always can tell when brooklyn's in the house. harlem in the house. harlem. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: there's no harlem. miley cyrus is from harlem. [ cheers and applause ] she's backstage. >> miley cyrus from harlem. that's what's up. >> jimmy: are you able to make money off the diddy part? is that something you could trademark and get a dollar every time somebody -

i said you love wine, you love dogs, i love you. so it was, it was great fun and i thank them. >> when is it coming out? >> in july. >> this is a little -- this next story is a little creepy. >> it's related but in a weird, bad way. >> you know when you lose a pet it's like losing a family member for a lot of people. it's very devastating. you wonder what should i do. there's a group out there that will freeze dry your pet so that you can keep it in the house in any expression you want. okay. i know it sounds weird. look what they do. this is a pet who has passed away. >> you would never know it. >> they put it in this machine and made it like this. it stays in this expression, they say forever. >> how about this one? >> how about here? >> this is creeping me out to no -- this is creeping me out. >> it's very expensive. it costs hundreds of dollars for small animals, thousands for larger dogs and takes a month. you know, the ones where they're sleeping like that, it's still weird. but i cremate my dogs. >> this is different. >> the

thank you, thank you. and a big, big thank you to this man right here, you guys.verybody. -- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com

you know sometimes you see a story and it seems so you think you understand it and then something else here see some other part of it and realize everything is off. the big. mystery. but in the alone itself there is a real headlines with not. the problem with the mainstream media today is that they're completely disconnected from the viewers and from what actually matters to those viewers and so that's like young people just don't watch t.v. anymore if they want news they go online and read it but we're trying to take those stories that people actually care about and transfer them back to t.v. . is the state english speaking russian channel it's kind of like. russia today has an extremely confrontational stance when it comes to us. our guys it's time for showing talent and i program i wrote this week we spoke about the mainstream media how they give birth right preferential treatment to certain candidates maybe like santorum and romney all the ignore ron paul so we want to know is that because of his current standings in the polls or might it be something else it's going to produce a p

if you can can you lift his shirt up? if you don't want to do it here.ake him to a private screening area. the back side? okay. >> bill: now, the wheelchair, was that for the child or did they just put him in it. >> child. he had a cast on his leg. father was taping this with iphone. >> one year ago by the way. >> two years ago. and so they give the kid a hard time. doing all this stuff. come on, huddy. this shouldn't be happening. >> this actually. since this happened, the tsa has changed some of the regulations. so it likely wouldn't hasp happen at this day. it's still we dick columbus. by the same token. these terrorists are creative. come up with clever ways. >> take a little kid and the kid already went through the metal detector, okay? what are they going to strap to the kid a boa constrictor. >> i'm not a terrorist and i don't come up with material. >> bill: knock off the shoes and belt. you have the metal detector saying if you want to use the scan, use the can. >> why am i the only one who feels okay going through this stuff. you are not torturi

the answers, to me, came back you, dave, you. you small businessman. you, mr. america. you, mrs.rica. you, the veteran. thank you for what you did, but all those things. it just seemed to me to come across as a lot warmer. >> huckabee: madam secretary, you have been in politics a long, long time. >> public service, government. >> huckabee: maybe i should say you've been in government. but politics leads to government whether we like it or not. it's one of those unintended consequences of politics and next thing you know, you're governing. you asked tough questions of these guys. tell me, did you get the answers that you were looking for? did they answer your questions? or did they give you a talking point? >> no, i agreed totally with dave. i think they gave very sincere answers. they clearly care deeply about our country, very troubled by the path we're currently on. we hear the same things and the same refrain and that is that we are uncompetitive in the international arena with our uncompetitive tax rate. we have an overwhelming burden of regulations, government regulations on

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