years later, when i think of zula during that first kiss, that first throbbing between my legs? it will be with an older girl, the daughter of my parents' friends. we'd steal my mother's cigarettes, take them out back behind our building, and light them up. she would blow her smoke past my face, stick her tongue in my mouth, slide her hand inside high shorts. how she'd know just what to do without me having to tell her. this was everything. this butch girl so unafraid, getting everything she wanted and how willing i was to give it to her. and i'm going to pause there. thank you so much. [ applause ] and i guess we can take some questions. i'll take some questions, if you want to have a conversation. >> can you go to the microphone over there? >> there's a microphone -- on that wall. thank you. thank you so much. >> first of all, i want to say thank you so much for sharing your story with us. i read the book a couple years ago when it was published, and i'm thrilled that you're here with us today to discuss it. >> thank you. >> i have some questions about -- i haven't read it in