1
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[Disclaimer read by Vegeta]

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[WARNING: These subtitles contain added awesomeness.
If you want the clean captions, please select the English option. Ta-ta~]

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GOKU: ♪ 'You put the lime in the coconut and drink 'em both up' ♪

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♪ 'You put the lime in the coconut and drink 'em both up' ♪

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KING KAI [telepathically]: Goku, come in!

6
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GOKU [t]: Oh hey, King Kai!

7
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KING KAI [t]: Your friends are in trouble, Goku!
Are you healed yet?

8
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GOKU [t]: Uhh... nah, I don't think so.

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KING KAI [t]: Well, how long do you think it's gonna take?

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GOKU [t]: Well, I think the machine will tell me when I'm done.

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KING KAI [t]: OK... you *think*, or you *know*?
[both aren't goku strong side]

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GOKU [t]: ♪ ...You put the lime in the coconut-- ♪

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KING KAI [t]: GOKU!

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GOKU [t]: Aww c'mon, King Kai, they don't need my help.
I bet they're doing just fine on their own.
[You *are* thinking of the same people we are, right?]

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VEGETA [off-screen]: Healer's down!

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KRILLIN: Need a res!

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GOHAN: Out of mana!

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VEGETA: WAAAAAAAGH...!

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KRILLIN: WAAAAAAAH...!
VEGETA: WAAAAAAAGH...!

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GOHAN: AAAAAAAH...!
KRILLIN: WAAAAAAAH...!
VEGETA: WAAAAAAAGH...!

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FREEZA: >:)
GOHAN: AAAAAAAH...!
KRILLIN: WAAAAAAAH...!
VEGETA: WAAAAAAAGH...!

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[♫ "Cha-La Head-Cha-La" ♫]

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♫ CHA-LA HEAD-CHA-LA ♫

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♫ Egao urutora zetto de ♫
(With a smile that’s Ultra-Z)

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♫ Kyô mo ai-yai-yai-yai-yai~ ♫
(Even today is ai-yai-yai-yai-yai~)

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♫ Sparking! [fading echo] ♫

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[Dramatic sting]

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PICCOLO: (Growling)

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FREEZA: It's been so long since I've had to use this form.
It feels like an old suit I never have an occasion to wear.

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PICCOLO: Ugh!
KRILLIN: Ugh!

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FREEZA: Unfortunately, whenever I put it on...

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someone *dies*.
[Freeza's final form cost: One soul.]

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GOHAN: Dende... *no*!

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FREEZA: Oh, don't cry for the poor thing.
I've saved him the fate of seeing what I'm about to do to you.

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VEGETA: Joke's on you; he hated the bald one .
[WHICH BALD ONE?!]

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KRILLIN: Hey, that's not fair!
[What Isn't?]

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He just met Piccolo!
[Pretty sure Dende thought Piccolo was Nail.]

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[Dramatic music]

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[Damn it, Gohan! Dodge!]

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VEGETA: GET DOWN!

41
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{BOOOM}
[Dramatic sting]

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KRILLIN: I couldn't even follow that attack!
It was almost instantaneous!
[Are you even going to recognize that Vegeta helped Gohan?]

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VEGETA: Yep! Just gonna stand
here and keep being awesome.

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PICCOLO: There's nothing we can do against that kind of power!
[Really? Nothing?]

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VEGETA: Uhh, hello? Awesome. Right here.

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GOHAN: We're all gonna die!
[Guess not. Proceed.]

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VEGETA: You know what? All of you better duck, because I'm about to turn left,

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and I don't wanna smack you with my dick.
[No wonder he got Bulma...]

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FREEZA [patronizing]: Oh look at you, Vegeta.
You're really going to fight me.

50
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Well, n-not really fight, more like... flailing angrily...
[that not 'Untrue']

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VEGETA: Make your jokes while you can, Freeza,
because I can now see the peak of your power...
[Vegeta, if only you knew... If only you Knew...]

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while I'm only beginning to tap into mine.
[Vegeta, if only you knew... If only you Knew...]

53
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FREEZA: I feel like we've been here before.
Have we been here before?
[Yes you have.]

54
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VEGETA: You see, I have finally realized the legend!

55
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FREEZA: Oh my God, this *is* happening again!

56
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VEGETA: That's right. You're not dealing with
the average Saiyan warrior anymore, Freeza.

57
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I,

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I, Vegeta,

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I, Vegeta, have finally become:

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I, Vegeta, have finally become:
THE LEGENDARY

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I, Vegeta, have finally become:
THE LEGENDARY SUPER SAIYAN™!

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[Dramatic sting]

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FREEZA [Sick of this shit]: OK, seriously, first off - "Super Saiyan"...

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what *is* that? What even *is* that?
I'll tell you what it is:
[The... Like, Only thing you fear and the reason you blew up Planet Vegeta when you did?]

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It's just some *stupid* legend passed by your filthy monkey ancestors around a campfire like it was their own dung!

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Let me tell you, Vegeta:

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Let me tell you, Vegeta:
I don't deal in *legends*;

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Let me tell you, Vegeta:
I don't deal in *legends*; I deal in facts.

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And here's a fact:

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By the end of this, you are going to be crying...
[FREEZA CAN SEE THE FUTUUUURE]

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By the end of this, you are going to be crying... like a little...
[FREEZA CAN SEE THE FUTUUUURE]

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By the end of this, you are going to be crying... like a little... *bitch*.
[FREEZA CAN SEE THE FUTUUUURE]

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VEGETA: ...Bitch, you just jealous of my Super Saiyan Swagger!

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FREEZA: Oh, for f**k's sake...

75
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VEGETA: HAARRRWAAUGH!

76
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HYAHH! [What did that mountain do to you?]

77
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[Vegeta continues to grunt while he attacks Freeza]

78
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'Yes! I have him on the ropes!
All he can do is dodge me!'

79
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FREEZA: 'God - Zarbon's dead, Dodoria's dead, the
Ginyu's are dead... this has been one giant mess.'
[And Cui...and Appule]

80
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'It's just like that jockstrap incident; only now,
I don't have Ginyu around to dig the holes.'

81
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VEGETA: AAAARRRRGH!

82
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Huh? Wha--?

83
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FREEZA: This may be a little off topic,
but how good are you at digging holes?

84
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VEGETA: Ugh!
FREEZA: This may be a little off topic,
but how good are you at digging holes?

85
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FREEZA: This may be a little off topic,
but how good are you at digging holes?
[Well, he can blow up a planet with Ki, so probably pretty good.]

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VEGETA: What are--

87
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FREEZA: I mean, besides the one
you've already dug yourself into.

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VEGETA: Hurrgh, don't you MOCK ME!!

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FREEZA [intrigued]: Oh?

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VEGETA: HRAAAAGH!

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HRAGH! HRAGH! HRAGH! HRAGH!

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KRILLIN: I don't get it! Why can't Vegeta hit him?!

93
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VEGETA: DAKKA! DAKKA! DAKKA!
PICCOLO: Because he keeps aiming where
he is instead of where he's going to be!
[Shows he's never played Space Invaders before.]

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PICCOLO: Because he keeps aiming where
he is instead of where he's going to be!
[Shows he's never played Space Invaders before.]

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GOHAN: Uuugh!

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PICCOLO: 'Oh, crap (!)'

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FREEZA: >:)
KRILLIN [o-s]: So, does this mean we should--?

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PICCOLO: DOOODGE!!

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KRILLIN: Hah!
PICCOLO: DOOODGE!!

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VEGETA: DAKKA! DAKKA! DAKKA! DAKKA! DA--!

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DAKKA! DAKKA--

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DAKKA DAKKA--AH!

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VEGETA: Ah... hurrgh!
FREEZA: So, are we done playing children's games, Vegeta?
[You can play Yu-Gi-Oh next.]

104
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FREEZA: Or do I have to *tickle* you?
[Or Pokemon.]

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VEGETA: St-stop... stop, stop...
FREEZA: Eh? Eh~? Coochie coo, coochie coochie coochie coo?

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VEGETA: STOP IT OR I'M GONNA BLOW YOU UP!!

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We'll see how you stand up to everything I've got!

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Take...

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Take... My

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Take... My Super...

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Take... my Super... Saiyan...

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Take... my Super... Saiyan... WRAAATH!!

113
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FREEZA: 'Oh, and I should probably
send the Ginyu's families something...'

114
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'Perhaps some wine, a gift basket...'

115
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[Falcon Kick!]

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VEGETA: AUGH!

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FREEZA: '...or maybe gift baskets *with* wine.'
[Huh, he really is a good dictator. Just don't piss him off.]

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VEGETA [saddened]: Wh-what...?

119
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VEGETA [saddened]: Wh-what...? How-aah...?

120
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VEGETA [saddened]: Wh-what...? How-aah...? How is tha--...?

121
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VEGETA [saddened]: Wh-what...? How-aah...? How is tha--...? Oh God...

122
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FREEZA: See? It's like I told you, Vegeta... like a *bitch*!
[FREEZA CAN SEE THE FUTUUUURE]

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A BITCH: [tearful]: Shut up!!

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FREEZA: Oh my *God*, you actually are crying! >:D

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A BITCH [crying]: I'm not crying!! Not!!

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FREEZA: Honestly, now I just feel bad.
Usually, I just blow up whatever's in my way,

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but with you, I've gotten kind of attached.
[Vegeta whimpers in fear]

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It's sort of like putting down Old Space Yeller.
[Damn.]

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KRILLIN [o-s]: How is that a thing??
[He's evil Krillin, he doesn't care.]

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FREEZA: It's sad, really... but before we
part ways, Vegeta, let me tell you a *tale*.

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["Prince Of All Monkeys Gets Whipped"]
VEGETA: AAAAH!

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FREEZA: The End.
[Story end]
[Good story. *****]

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{SPLASH}

134
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[Moses ain't got shit on Emperor Freeza.]

135
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FREEZA: See that, Vegeta? Now, for my
next trick, I'm going to make an asshole disappear!

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ORPHEUS (yes, the crab): Wagwan, brethren Vegeta? Me be a spirit animal.

137
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And me here tell you how to mash up that bumbaclot Freeza. All ya gotta do is--
[Vegeta groans and pants]

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AAH!
[Apparently Freeza likes live crabs... who knew?]

139
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[Apparently Freeza likes live crabs... who knew?]

140
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AAH!
[Apparently Freeza likes live crabs... who knew?]

141
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{Nom nom nom}

142
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{GULP}

143
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FREEZA: Hey, Vegeta!

144
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VEGETA: Wha... whaat--?

145
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{THUMP}
BAAH!

146
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FREEZA: Stop hitting yourself.

147
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{THUMP}
VEGETA: UUGH!

148
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FREEZA: Stop hitting yourself.

149
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{THUMP}
VEGETA: URGH!

150
00:06:08,480 --> 00:06:09,320
FREEZA: Stop hitting yourself.

151
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{THUMP}
VEGETA: AAGH-AAH!

152
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{THUD}
Aha! Haha, you're the one hitting me!

153
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FREEZA: Au contraire, Vegeta... you brought this upon yourself.
[He's not wrong.]

154
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VEGETA: UGH! AAH!

155
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BUGH!

156
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KRILLIN: Should... we... help... him?

157
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GOHAN: WUGH!
KRILLIN: WUGH!
PICCOLO: WUGH!

158
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FREEZA: Oh, go ahead. Pool's open; water's fine.

159
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Hm? No? Just going to stand there like a bunch of pissants?

160
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Thought so.

161
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Now, where were we?
Oh right, I believe it waaaaas...

162
00:06:41,540 --> 00:06:42,200
Now, where were we?
Oh right, I believe it waaaaas... kidney punch!

163
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{THUMP}
VEGETA: AAAAGH!

164
00:06:43,080 --> 00:06:44,580
{THUMP THUMP THUMP}
VEGETA: AAGH! URGH! UUGH!
FREEZA: Kidney punch! Kidney punch! Kidney punch!

165
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FREEZA: And pause...

166
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{THUMP}
VEGETA: AAAAUGH!
FREEZA: And pause... kidney punch!

167
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GOKU [t]: ♪ Row, row, row your boat ♪

168
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GOKU [t]: ♪ Gently down the stream ♪

169
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GOKU [t]: ♪ Merrily merrily merrily merrily ♪

170
00:06:55,720 --> 00:06:57,480
GOKU [t]: ♪ Life is but a dream ♪

171
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GOKU [t]: ♪ Row, row, row your boat ♪

172
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KING KAI [t]: ♪ Row, row, row your boat ♪
GOKU [t]: ♪ Gently down the stream ♪

173
00:07:01,180 --> 00:07:03,020
KING KAI [t]: ♪ Gently down the stream ♪
GOKU [t]: ♪ Merrily merrily merrily merrily ♪

174
00:07:03,020 --> 00:07:04,840
KING KAI [t]: ♪ Merrily merrily merrily merrily ♪
GOKU [t]: ♪ Life is but a dream ♪

175
00:07:04,840 --> 00:07:06,640
KING KAI [t]: ♪ Life is but a dream ♪
GOKU [t]: ♪ Row, row, row your boat ♪

176
00:07:06,640 --> 00:07:08,460
KING KAI [t]: ♪ Row, row, row your boat ♪
GOKU [t]: ♪ Gently down the stream ♪

177
00:07:08,460 --> 00:07:10,340
TENSHINHAN: ♪ Row, row, row your boat ♪
KING KAI [t]: ♪ Gently down the stream ♪
GOKU [t]: ♪ Merrily merrily merrily merrily ♪

178
00:07:10,340 --> 00:07:12,100
TENSHINHAN: ♪ Gently down the stream ♪
KING KAI [t]: ♪ Merrily merrily merrily merrily ♪
GOKU [t]: ♪ Life is but a dream ♪

179
00:07:12,100 --> 00:07:14,000
TENSHINHAN: ♪ Merrily merrily merrily merrily ♪
KING KAI [t]: ♪ Life is but a dream ♪
GOKU [t]: ♪ Row, row, row your boat ♪

180
00:07:14,000 --> 00:07:15,620
TENSHINHAN: ♪ Life is but a dream ♪
KING KAI [t]: ♪ Row, row, row your boat ♪
GOKU [t]: ♪ Gently down the stream ♪

181
00:07:15,620 --> 00:07:17,020
TENSHINHAN: ♪ Row, row, row your boat ♪
KING KAI [t]: ♪ Gently down the stream ♪
GOKU [t]: ♪ Merrily merrily merrily merrily ♪

182
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YAMCHA: (Inhale)
TENSHINHAN: ♪ Row, row, row your boat ♪
KING KAI [t]: ♪ Gently down the stream ♪
GOKU [t]: ♪ Merrily merrily merrily merrily ♪

183
00:07:17,520 --> 00:07:18,020
{BEEP}
[yeah fuck Yamcha]

184
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GOKU: 'Pod's done!'
{BEEP}
[yeah fuck Yamcha]

185
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{SLAM}
VEGETA: UGH!

186
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UGH-uhh!

187
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FREEZA: It seems our game is over, Vegeta.

188
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Now that we're done here, it's time
to send you crying home to mommy.

189
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VEGETA: My mother's dead...

190
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FREEZA: I know.
[Badass.]

191
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HYEEEEEEEAAAH!

192
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PICCOLO: Urgh!
KRILLIN: Aah!
GOHAN: Uhh!

193
00:07:45,180 --> 00:07:48,740
[Musical swell (heroic music)]

194
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FREEZA: ...Who--

195
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GOKU: Hey guys, how's it going?
[To Piccolo] Piccolo? When did you come back?

196
00:07:53,420 --> 00:07:54,940
PICCOLO: Uh... Dragon Balls.

197
00:07:54,940 --> 00:07:58,200
GOKU: Oh, neat!
[To Krillin] Hey, Krillin! That armor looks funny on ya!

198
00:07:58,200 --> 00:07:59,040
GOHAN: Hey, Dad!

199
00:07:59,040 --> 00:07:59,540
GOKU: Hey.
[father of the year everyone]

200
00:07:59,540 --> 00:08:01,160
So are you that Freezer guy?

201
00:08:01,740 --> 00:08:04,000
Freezer Guy ...I am *Lord* Freeza, yes.

202
00:08:04,000 --> 00:08:06,400
GOKU: Awesome! I'mma deck you in the schnoz!

203
00:08:07,260 --> 00:08:08,400
{THUD}
VEGETA: Owww...

204
00:08:08,400 --> 00:08:12,780
FREEZA [surprised]: I'm sorry, that's a
new one, er... who, are you, exactly?
[Does that count as a Heroic Speech though?]

205
00:08:12,780 --> 00:08:14,420
GOKU: I'm Goku!

206
00:08:14,420 --> 00:08:16,200
GOKU: I'm Goku!
I'm insane...
[true that]

207
00:08:16,200 --> 00:08:17,540
GOKU: I'm Goku!
I'm insane... from Earth!
[and that]

208
00:08:17,540 --> 00:08:19,120
FREEZA: ...
[Contemplating if what he said is correct.]

209
00:08:19,120 --> 00:08:21,220
VEGETA [weakly]: He means Saiyan...

210
00:08:21,220 --> 00:08:24,999
FREEZA: Uh, between you and the Namekian,
I think I've lost my touch at genocide!

211
00:08:25,000 --> 00:08:28,360
GOKU: What's wrong, Vegeta?
Did Freezer do this to you?

212
00:08:28,360 --> 00:08:33,600
Freezer: Oh look, he's all concerned.
I'm impressed, Vegeta; you managed to make a friend.
[As of this Saga, 'Friend' Is kind of an overstatement. 'Begrudged allies' is more like it.]

213
00:08:33,600 --> 00:08:36,060
VEGETA [weakly]: Hate you... hate you both...
[Told you so.]

214
00:08:36,060 --> 00:08:39,440
FREEZA: Unfortunately, Vegeta and I were having a disagreement.

215
00:08:39,440 --> 00:08:41,940
He wanted himself to live, and well...

216
00:08:42,260 --> 00:08:43,200
I didn't.

217
00:08:43,200 --> 00:08:44,660
GOKU: Why do you wanna die?

218
00:08:44,660 --> 00:08:47,940
FREEZA: Wha--... no, I, I-I mea--I meant I want *him* to die--

219
00:08:47,940 --> 00:08:49,060
GOKU: Is it 'cause you look weird?

220
00:08:49,060 --> 00:08:49,680
[He *does* look pretty weird...]

221
00:08:49,680 --> 00:08:50,240
FREEZA: ...WHAT?!

222
00:08:50,240 --> 00:08:53,420
GOKU: Well, you know you got that
big head, those weird lips and that tail...

223
00:08:53,420 --> 00:08:54,680
FREEZA: Eeeegh!
GOKU: Well, you know you got that
big head, those weird lips and that tail...

224
00:08:56,660 --> 00:08:58,320
GOKU: ...and you don't have ears...
[He technically does]

225
00:08:58,320 --> 00:08:59,540
FREEZA: Okay, *NO*!

226
00:09:05,180 --> 00:09:08,080
GOKU: ...and to top it all off, you're really kind of a jerk.
[He's not a jerk, he's just evil.]

227
00:09:08,080 --> 00:09:09,880
FREEZA: And apparently, this is now happening.

228
00:09:09,880 --> 00:09:11,480
Vegeta! Explain!

229
00:09:11,480 --> 00:09:13,840
VEGETA [weakly]: Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha...

230
00:09:13,840 --> 00:09:15,040
FREEZA: [To Goku] What are you...?
VEGETA [weakly]: Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha...

231
00:09:15,040 --> 00:09:21,420
you see, Freeza... you aren't dealing with
the average Saiyan warrior anymore...

232
00:09:21,420 --> 00:09:22,200
FREEZA: Oh~

233
00:09:22,200 --> 00:09:22,860
FREEZA: Oh~ my~

234
00:09:22,860 --> 00:09:23,780
FREEZA: Oh~ my~ *God*~!!

235
00:09:23,780 --> 00:09:31,400
VEGETA [weakly]: He has risen above, and
become a legend... the legend that you fear...

236
00:09:32,020 --> 00:09:35,220
He has become... A SUPER SAI--

237
00:09:35,220 --> 00:09:35,840
He has become... A SUPER SAI--YAN!!

238
00:09:37,040 --> 00:09:37,740
GOKU: (Gasp) VEGETA!!

239
00:09:37,740 --> 00:09:38,560
{HISS}
GOKU: (Gasp) VEGETA!!

240
00:09:38,560 --> 00:09:41,600
FREEZA: No, seriously, you have no idea how old that got.
[I agree with Freeza on that.]

241
00:09:41,600 --> 00:09:45,600
[♫ Closing theme (DBZ intermission) ♫]

242
00:09:47,080 --> 00:09:48,900
VEGETA: Laugh while you can, Freeza!

243
00:09:48,900 --> 00:09:51,200
Because I'm about to rock you...

244
00:09:51,200 --> 00:09:52,780
like a hurricane.

245
00:09:52,780 --> 00:09:56,960
[♫ "Rock You Like A Hurricane" ♫]

246
00:09:56,960 --> 00:09:57,660
[Cut-off]

247
00:09:58,020 --> 00:09:59,200
Huh...

248
00:09:59,200 --> 00:10:01,400
I should've known that was only a one hit wonder.
[but Scorpions has tones of hits+you just throw a small rock at him, its not gonna do much]