1
00:00:00,040 --> 00:00:02,320
[Bulma reading the above]

2
00:00:02,320 --> 00:00:10,240
[WARNING: These subtitles contain added awesomeness.
If you want the clean captions, please select the English option. Ta-ta~]

3
00:00:11,640 --> 00:00:12,720
BULMA: Hey, Yamcha!

4
00:00:12,720 --> 00:00:15,240
Thanks for coming by and picking up the rest of your stuff.

5
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YAMCHA: Hey, no problem!
[Bulma goes through more hairstyle changes than Goku does transformations.]

6
00:00:16,360 --> 00:00:19,580
I mean... didn't have to, y'know... throw out most of it...
[Bulma goes through more hairstyle changes than Goku does transformations.]

7
00:00:19,580 --> 00:00:21,860
BULMA: Eh, you were dead and it was taking up space.

8
00:00:21,860 --> 00:00:23,100
OOLONG: Much like your corpse.

9
00:00:23,100 --> 00:00:26,200
YAMCHA: Ha ha! Ah... where did you bury me anyway?

10
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BULMA: Bury?

11
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[Flies buzzing]

12
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OOLONG: So, Bulma, how's the single life treating you?

13
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BULMA: It's been nice actually, had a dream about Vegeta last night--

14
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YAMCHA: You slut!

15
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BULMA: We were walking in a park!

16
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YAMCHA: You slut!

17
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BULMA: OK, first off, we're not even dating!

18
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Second of all, I don't even like him.
[Right...]

19
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Third, he's probably running out of fuel soon,
so God knows if he'll ever make it back here.

20
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{BOOM}

21
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VEGETA [off-screen]: I'M BACK, BITCHES!

22
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[♫ "Cha-La Head-Cha-La" ♫]

23
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♫ CHA-LA HEAD-CHA-LA ♫

24
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♫ Egao urutora zetto de ♫
(With a smile that’s Ultra-Z)

25
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♫ Kyô mo ai-yai-yai-yai-yai~ ♫
(Even today is ai-yai-yai-yai-yai~)

26
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♫ Sparking! [fading echo] ♫

27
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MILF: Sweetie, roll out the cot! I think we have a visitor!

28
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DR. BRIEF [o-s]: Is he colored?!

29
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MILF: I'm not sure, I never open my eyes!

30
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YAMCHA: Hey! You've got a lot of nerve coming back here!

31
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VEGETA: Oh, a valet. Neat.
I'm not tipping.

32
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VALET: Don't you remember who I am?!
We fought when you landed on Earth!

33
00:01:28,160 --> 00:01:31,660
VEGETA: No, I fought Kakarot.
*Nappa* fought everyone else.

34
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Well, except for that one scrub who got killed by a Saiba--

35
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Hahaha!

36
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Hahaha! Ahahahahaha!

37
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Hahaha! Ahahahahaha! AHAHAHAHAhahaha!

38
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Hahaha! Ahahahahaha! AHAHAHAHAhahaha!
YAMCHA: Oh, yeah?! I dare you to come over here and laugh at me!

39
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YAMCHA: Oh, yeah?! I dare you to come over here and laugh at me!

40
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VEGETA: Ha...

41
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VEGETA: Ha... ha...

42
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VEGETA: Ha... ha... ha.

43
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YAMCHA [pissing himself]: Yeah, see, now we can laugh together?

44
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BULMA: OK, seriously, we have enough to clean up
without a pool of Yamcha's urine.

45
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You, come with me.

46
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VEGETA: What? Why?

47
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BULMA: Because you need a shower!
I could smell you from East City.

48
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VEGETA: (Grumbling)... Pacific Ci-- smell you from East City... (grumbling)
[Where did the holes in the front of his armor go?]

49
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VEGETA: (Grumbling)... Pacific Ci-- smell you from East City... (grumbling)
YAMCHA: 'Yeah, you better run...'

50
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BULMA: Hey, I'm setting out some new clothes for you,
and I'm gonna wash your armor!
[I don't think a wash is gonna fix the gaping holes in them.]

51
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VEGETA: Fine, but be careful! Those are dry clean only!

52
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BULMA: Whatever.

53
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VEGETA [o-s]: No, seriously, they lose their elasticity!

54
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[Door shuts]

55
00:02:17,380 --> 00:02:18,440
...Hello?

56
00:02:18,600 --> 00:02:20,580
KRILLIN: So... Vegeta's living here now?

57
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That's neat.

58
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YAMCHA: The man single-handedly responsible for murdering
most of the entire gang is taking a shower in the other room.

59
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"Neat" is not the first word that comes to mind.

60
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BULMA: OK, so I just got a look at Vegeta's ass, and
besides being surprisingly nice, he's got this weird hole.

61
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WANNABE SMARTASS: Uh, yeah, even boys have those, Bulma.

62
00:02:35,860 --> 00:02:38,840
BULMA: No, you idiot! I mean a hole *above* that one!

63
00:02:39,820 --> 00:02:41,100
IDIOT: ...You mean he's a chick??

64
00:02:41,180 --> 00:02:43,500
VEGETA [o-s]: Earth-woman! Where's the cleansing powder?

65
00:02:43,560 --> 00:02:45,920
BULMA: We don't have that here, we have soap!

66
00:02:45,920 --> 00:02:47,360
VEGETA [o-s]: The hell is "soap"?

67
00:02:47,360 --> 00:02:50,080
BULMA: It's that yellow block there made of animal fat!

68
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VEGETA [o-s]: That sounds *awesome*!

69
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{CHOMP}

70
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Blah! This tastes nothing like what you just said!

71
00:02:55,340 --> 00:02:57,320
YAMCHA: OK, I change my mind, this *is* pretty neat.

72
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VEGETA [o-s]: Is that the beta male?!

73
00:02:58,860 --> 00:03:00,800
BULMA: No! Krillin just got here!

74
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VEGETA [o-s]: Oh *God*, they're *breeding*!

75
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I swear, the only thing I hate more than weaklings, is the color pink!

76
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[Sounds of Vegeta getting out of the shower]

77
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AAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!

78
00:03:23,120 --> 00:03:24,440
KING COLD: There it is...

79
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The home of the brute who dared lay hands on my darling little angel.
[Little angel?]

80
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FREEZA (cyborg voice): Yes, Daddy.

81
00:03:30,180 --> 00:03:32,700
KING COLD: What a pretty little blue pearl it is.

82
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What was it called? "Ee-arth"?

83
00:03:35,120 --> 00:03:38,080
FREEZA: Actually, it's pronounced "Earth", Daddy-Daddy-Daddy-Daddy.

84
00:03:38,080 --> 00:03:38,580
{BZZZT} [Hit Ctrl-Alt-Del.]
FREEZA: Actually, it's pronounced "Earth", Daddy-Daddy-Daddy-Daddy.

85
00:03:38,880 --> 00:03:41,100
KING COLD: Really? But there's an "A" in it.

86
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I'm just going to keep calling it Ee-arth.

87
00:03:43,760 --> 00:03:48,400
FREEZA: It doesn't really matter anyway.
Soon, it'll have a brand new name...

88
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*Vacant Lot*!

89
00:03:50,300 --> 00:03:51,740
VEGETA: Son of a BITCH!

90
00:03:51,740 --> 00:03:53,120
YAMCHA: What, still ticked off about the shirt?

91
00:03:53,120 --> 00:03:56,860
VEGETA [not tickled pink]: No, I'm-- well, yes actually, I'm absolutely livid.
But that's not the point!

92
00:03:56,860 --> 00:04:00,520
That idiot Kakarot *failed*! Freeza's *still alive*!
[Does that *really* surprise you? He let *you* live.]

93
00:04:02,020 --> 00:04:04,020
TIEN: Chiaotzu... do you feel that?

94
00:04:04,200 --> 00:04:06,800
There are two enormous power levels approaching the planet.

95
00:04:06,900 --> 00:04:09,600
CHIAOTZU: Yeah, see, last time this happened...

96
00:04:09,600 --> 00:04:11,040
I blew myself up.

97
00:04:11,040 --> 00:04:13,960
TIEN: Yeah, I was gonna ask you to hold off on that this time.
[But what if he wants the Sundae?]

98
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PICCOLO [o-s]: RAAAAAAAAAaargh!

99
00:04:16,820 --> 00:04:20,040
NAIL: 'See, now we just have to carve out an area
and then we'll start building the hi--'

100
00:04:20,040 --> 00:04:21,680
'eyyy, do you feel that?'

101
00:04:21,680 --> 00:04:24,060
PICCOLO: Freeza?! NOOOOOOOOOooooo!!

102
00:04:24,060 --> 00:04:26,720
NAIL: 'OK, I'm right here! Please stop yelling!'
PICCOLO: Freeza?! NOOOOOOOOOooooo!!

103
00:04:26,720 --> 00:04:27,600
KRILLIN [via phone]: Oh God, Gohan!

104
00:04:27,600 --> 00:04:28,160
KRILLIN [via phone]: Oh God, Gohan! It's him it's him

105
00:04:28,160 --> 00:04:28,700
KRILLIN [via phone]: Oh God, Gohan! It's him it's him it's him it's him

106
00:04:28,700 --> 00:04:29,320
KRILLIN [via phone]: Oh God, Gohan! It's him it's him it's him it's him
it's him it's him

107
00:04:29,320 --> 00:04:29,940
KRILLIN [via phone]: Oh God, Gohan! It's him it's him it's him it's him
it's him it's him it's him it's him

108
00:04:29,940 --> 00:04:30,580
KRILLIN [via phone]: Oh God, Gohan! It's him it's him it's him it's him
it's him it's him it's him it's him it's him it's him

109
00:04:30,580 --> 00:04:31,400
KRILLIN [via phone]: Oh God, Gohan! It's him it's him it's him it's him
it's him it's him it's him it's him it's him it's him it's him it's him!

110
00:04:31,400 --> 00:04:34,840
GOHAN: Krillin, calm down!
Now are you sure it's him?

111
00:04:34,840 --> 00:04:37,840
KRILLIN: Gohan, once you've had a man inside of you...

112
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...you know when he's coming.
[Oh my~]

113
00:04:41,140 --> 00:04:43,940
GOHAN: Mom! Where's my Saiyan suit?!

114
00:04:43,940 --> 00:04:46,140
VEGETA: Woman! Where is my Saiyan suit?!

115
00:04:46,140 --> 00:04:47,400
CHI-CHI [o-s]: It's under your bed!

116
00:04:47,400 --> 00:04:48,360
GOHAN: Thank you!

117
00:04:48,360 --> 00:04:49,500
BULMA [o-s]: It's in the wash!

118
00:04:49,500 --> 00:04:50,700
VEGETA: You bitch!

119
00:05:04,680 --> 00:05:09,100
Alright, judging by how quickly his power level
is closing in, he should be here in about--

120
00:05:09,100 --> 00:05:10,860
YAMCHA: Hey, so I need to talk to you about Bulma!

121
00:05:10,860 --> 00:05:12,380
VEGETA: You cannot be serious!

122
00:05:12,380 --> 00:05:15,900
YAMCHA: Look, we're not dating anymore,
but still, she's a really close friend and--

123
00:05:15,900 --> 00:05:18,020
VEGETA [incredulous]: You are actually doing this right now.

124
00:05:20,260 --> 00:05:21,580
BULMA: Hey, guys!

125
00:05:21,580 --> 00:05:23,900
VEGETA: Oh, great! And she's here too!

126
00:05:23,900 --> 00:05:26,660
Why don't all you idiots just start showing up?!
[Be careful what you wish for...]

127
00:05:26,660 --> 00:05:27,820
KRILLIN: Hey, Vegeta!
[...]

128
00:05:27,820 --> 00:05:29,740
VEGETA [o-s]: I was f*cking *kidding*!
[...you might get it. ;)]

129
00:05:30,400 --> 00:05:31,840
YAMCHA: Tenshinhan! Chiaotzu!

130
00:05:32,020 --> 00:05:34,120
TIEN: Huh, looks like we got here in time.

131
00:05:34,680 --> 00:05:36,540
Oh hey... Vegeta.

132
00:05:36,540 --> 00:05:37,320
VEGETA: What?

133
00:05:37,720 --> 00:05:38,840
TIEN: Nice shirt.

134
00:05:38,840 --> 00:05:40,560
VEGETA: And there it is!

135
00:05:40,560 --> 00:05:43,860
Now all we need is the Namekian and we'll have the whole potpourri of pathetic.

136
00:05:44,020 --> 00:05:46,120
PICCOLO: Uh, been here the whole time, actually.

137
00:05:46,120 --> 00:05:47,640
VEGETA: Oh, what do you want? A medal?

138
00:05:48,440 --> 00:05:49,300
PICCOLO: ...Nice shirt.

139
00:05:49,300 --> 00:05:50,900
VEGETA: Kiss my ass, green man.

140
00:05:50,900 --> 00:05:52,860
PICCOLO: Yeah, it's the kind of shirt that really screams--

141
00:05:52,880 --> 00:05:53,760
HUH...!

142
00:05:53,760 --> 00:05:54,820
HE'S COMING!

143
00:06:10,020 --> 00:06:11,520
KRILLIN: He's landing over there!

144
00:06:11,900 --> 00:06:13,660
PICCOLO [o-s]: Wait, now he's pulling back.

145
00:06:13,660 --> 00:06:14,920
KRILLIN: No, now he's--

146
00:06:14,920 --> 00:06:16,660
Going back that way...

147
00:06:18,320 --> 00:06:19,720
What's he doing?

148
00:06:20,240 --> 00:06:22,420
FREEZA [via speaker]: Daddy, we can park anywhere we want!
[Or... you can just blow up Earth from space.]

149
00:06:22,620 --> 00:06:27,120
KING COLD [vs]: Now, son, if this is anything like that
jockstrap incident, we don't want to get boxed in.
[After all, that plan worked perfectly with Planet Vegeta.]

150
00:06:28,220 --> 00:06:32,740
KRILLIN: So has anyone else noticed that there are
*two* power levels around the same strength on that ship?

151
00:06:32,740 --> 00:06:34,300
VEGETA: Yeah, it's probably his dad.

152
00:06:34,300 --> 00:06:35,460
YAMCHA: He has a father?!

153
00:06:35,460 --> 00:06:37,520
PICCOLO: Makes sense. Everyone has a dad.

154
00:06:38,040 --> 00:06:39,520
...'Ceeept me.

155
00:06:39,520 --> 00:06:41,000
VEGETA: Ha! Your dad's dead!

156
00:06:41,000 --> 00:06:42,120
PICCOLO: So's yours!

157
00:06:42,120 --> 00:06:42,780
VEGETA [o-s]: HA!

158
00:06:42,820 --> 00:06:48,840
GOHAN: So, essentially, we have two opponents of equal strength
that my father could only beat after fulfilling an ancient alien prophecy.

159
00:06:48,860 --> 00:06:53,860
Does anyone in particular know exactly what we're
doing here besides trying not to lose it?!

160
00:06:53,860 --> 00:06:59,220
YAMCHA [losing it]: Guys, we are so screwed! I don't know what we're gonna do! I mean this is completely crazy! Why did I come here again?! We're going to die!

161
00:06:59,220 --> 00:06:59,720
I'm gonna die again! I don't wanna die again! Dying once is bad enough! Oh go-ha-hah!
KRILLIN: You know, if he weren't doing it... I would.

162
00:06:59,720 --> 00:07:02,200
I'm gonna die again! I don't wanna die again! Dying once is bad enough! Oh go-ha-hah!
KRILLIN: You know, if he weren't doing it... I would.

163
00:07:02,200 --> 00:07:03,140
I'm gonna die again! I don't wanna die again! Dying once is bad enough! Oh go-ha-hah!
KRILLIN: You know, if he weren't doing it... I would.

164
00:07:03,140 --> 00:07:05,580
VEGETA: We don't need Kakarot or anyone else.

165
00:07:05,640 --> 00:07:08,880
You have enough badass Saiyan on your team as it is.

166
00:07:08,880 --> 00:07:15,060
Now if you'll excuse me, you all can just sit on your
hands while I go up there and take care of business.

167
00:07:15,400 --> 00:07:23,500
GOHAN: Or - maybe we could hide our power levels, sneak closer to them,
survey the situation from up close, and, perhaps, catch them by surprise?

168
00:07:24,100 --> 00:07:25,520
JUICY: Y'all are bitches.

169
00:07:28,380 --> 00:07:30,860
KING COLD: Well, son, is this what you were expecting?

170
00:07:30,860 --> 00:07:33,100
FREEZA: My God, this is droll.

171
00:07:33,100 --> 00:07:38,500
We're so far out in the space sti-ti-ti-ticks,
there's not even a space Radioshack,

172
00:07:38,500 --> 00:07:40,860
much less a space Best Buy-Buy-Buy-Buy--

173
00:07:40,860 --> 00:07:41,420
{BZZZT}
much less a space Best Buy-Buy-Buy-Buy--

174
00:07:41,420 --> 00:07:42,500
Circuit City.

175
00:07:42,500 --> 00:07:43,520
KING COLD: Are you alright?

176
00:07:43,520 --> 00:07:45,400
FREEZA: Yes, Daddy, just processing.

177
00:07:45,400 --> 00:07:48,060
KING COLD: And wouldn't you know it, no place to buy more RAM!

178
00:07:48,060 --> 00:07:52,360
FREEZA: But I won't lie, Daddy. I'm absolutely ecstatic.

179
00:07:52,660 --> 00:07:59,380
When that filthy monkey arrives back on the planet, he'll return
not to the smiling faces of his dear friends and family...

180
00:07:59,380 --> 00:08:04,040
but a Total. Unadulterated. *Genocide*!

181
00:08:04,040 --> 00:08:08,540
Speaking of which...
Soldiers! The scavenger hunt will proceed as such:

182
00:08:08,540 --> 00:08:10,740
* Normal human heads are worth one point.

183
00:08:10,740 --> 00:08:12,620
* Normal human heads are worth one point.
* Namekian heads are worth twenty.

184
00:08:12,620 --> 00:08:14,900
* Normal human heads are worth one point.
* Namekian heads are worth twenty.
* Filthy half-Saiyan brats, fifty!

185
00:08:15,380 --> 00:08:17,720
And if you find any miserable,

186
00:08:17,720 --> 00:08:18,440
And if you find any miserable, odious,

187
00:08:18,440 --> 00:08:19,580
And if you find any miserable, odious, insubordinate,

188
00:08:19,580 --> 00:08:20,600
And if you find any miserable, odious, insubordinate, full-blooded

189
00:08:20,600 --> 00:08:21,200
And if you find any miserable, odious, insubordinate, full-blooded monkey

190
00:08:21,200 --> 00:08:22,540
And if you find any miserable, odious, insubordinate, full-blooded monkey garbage...
[Making the assumption that Vegeta would actually be here?]

191
00:08:22,540 --> 00:08:23,220
you win!

192
00:08:23,620 --> 00:08:24,960
Well, off you go!

193
00:08:24,960 --> 00:08:25,840
MOOKS: Yes, sir!

194
00:08:39,500 --> 00:08:42,800
[Cue fangirl squeeing everywhere]

195
00:08:42,800 --> 00:08:43,540
(???): So...

196
00:08:43,980 --> 00:08:45,640
how many points are those?

197
00:08:45,820 --> 00:08:49,560
♫

198
00:08:50,680 --> 00:09:17,740
YAMCHA: [Spends 27 m̶i̶n̶u̶t̶e̶s̶ seconds shitting himself]

199
00:09:17,740 --> 00:09:19,740
FAULERRO: I-- that literally devolved into nonsense.