WEBVTT

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Hello, I'm Mr. Red.

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A horse is a horse, of course, of course, and no one can talk to a horse, of course,

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that is, of course, unless the horse is the famous Mr. Red.

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Go right to the source and ask the horse, he'll give you the answer that you endorse.

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He's always on a steady course.

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Talk to Mr. Red.

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J'ai le crayon.

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I have the pencil.

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J'ai le crayon.

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J'ai le crayon.

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You have the pencil.

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Vous avez le crayon.

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Vous avez le crayon.

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Hey, what's going on here?

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Hello, chérie.

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How are you?

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What's with the beret and the phonograph?

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Where'd you get them?

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I ordered them over the telephone.

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I am thinking of taking the trip around the world.

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The only trip you're taking is around the stable.

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The horse wanting to travel, that's the most ridiculous thing I ever heard of.

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But I want to see Spain, France, China.

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China?

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China, coming up.

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I'm getting the rickshaw, I'll be right with you.

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Oh, hopping rickshaw, sir.

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25 yen, first mile.

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I run very fast.

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Oh, come on, here we go.

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Oh, we thought we had Great Wall of China.

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We're on the right place, and on the right, we have the fate.

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I think you've flipped your fortune cookie.

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Thank you, Pudgy.

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Well, what's new?

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You still married?

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No, I'm still single.

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Well, what's new? You still married, okay?

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Wilbur, I don't understand what goes on in here.

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Somehow you're a different man once you come into this bar.

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You talk to yourself, you act strangely.

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Why don't you give up this place and get yourself an office on the outside?

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I can't. I'm not well.

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I'll see the world if I have to join the Navy.

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Hello?

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Hello, this is George Hausner from radio station WPXQ.

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What's on your mind, George?

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I'm calling for our giant jackpot contest.

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Is this Mr. Post?

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How much is the prize?

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$100.

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This is Mr. Post. What's your question?

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Mr. Post, you have just one minute to answer.

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Now, you may feel free to use any books that you have.

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Your friends can help you.

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Stop gabbing, George, and ask the question.

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All right, Mr. Post, you have one minute to answer.

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Can you tell us, what is the capital of Iceland?

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That's easy. Reykjavik.

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Congratulations, Mr. Post, you have won $100.

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And you are now eligible for our giant jackpot $5,000 prize next week.

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$5,000?

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Oh, thank you.

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Thank you.

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Those little Spanish fillies are practically sitting on my lap now.

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La cucaracha, la cucaracha.

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Wilbur!

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What? What's the matter?

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Why didn't you tell me you won a contest?

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Oh, well, I didn't... What contest?

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This contest. Oh, you should have told me.

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Wilbur Post, 17 Valley Road, won contest.

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Eligible for $5,000 final next week.

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Must be some other Wilbur Post.

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Living at the same address?

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You got a point there.

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Oh, Wilbur, I'm so proud of you.

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Honey, I tell you, it wasn't me.

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I'm gonna call the radio station and...

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It was me, buddy boy.

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Had you fooled for a minute, didn't I?

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Oh, Wilbur, how did you know that the capital of Iceland was Rykjavik?

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It is? I mean, it is.

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Any school horse knows... Any school boy knows that.

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Well, how's our famous quiz kid?

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Congratulations, my boy.

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Isn't it wonderful? Just imagine, if he answers this question, we get $5,000.

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Two mink coats as the fur flies.

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Wilbur, what do you intend to do with the $5,000 if you win?

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Well, I really hadn't thought about it.

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Well, we've always wanted to travel, but we never could afford it.

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Maybe we could go to Europe.

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Sure. And if we run out of money in Copenhagen, I'll just pick up the phone and win another $5,000.

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Oh, I wish we could go along.

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Why not? Money was meant to be spent.

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Oh, I think it's a wonderful idea. The four of us should have a rousing time in Europe.

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Sure. We'll spend the $5,000 we won, and then with the $5,000 you're going to spend, we will have a rousing time.

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You mean...

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We're not going as your guests?

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Well, on second thought, let's see America first. It's more patriotic.

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And cheaper.

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Oh, honey, I always said you were smart.

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Wait till my family read about your winning.

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My father always thought you were a dumbbell.

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Yeah, well, this will prove... He did?

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Well, I bet he doesn't know that Reykjavik is the capital of Sweden.

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Iceland.

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I just want to see if you're on your toes.

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Well, if you want me to hear, I'll be in my office, resting my brain.

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Rupert, maybe you should start studying. I mean, who knows what question they're going to ask you next week.

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Just let them dial. I'll be ready at my end.

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Ed? Oh, boy. Ed, how did you do it?

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It was nothing.

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Start at the very beginning. Tell me all about it.

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Nothing to tell. The phone rang, I answered, and please put the hundred in my account.

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I was so excited. You know, if we win that $5,000, I'm going to take her to Europe.

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Sure, we can't leave her here. Let's take her with us.

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And we'll travel first class. I don't like to mix with the hoi polloi.

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Ed, forget about it. We can't take a horse along.

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Hold it, Mac. Who's taking who?

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I answered the phone last night.

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But you used my name.

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But I used my brain.

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Well, we'll try to work something out, Ed.

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Meanwhile, I better start phoning up.

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Wilbur, I've been thinking.

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When that phone rings next week, you may get stage fright.

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They may ask you a perfectly simple question like,

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Who is the 13th President of the United States?

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You can't answer. The next day, millions of people are going to be laughing at you.

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Why is your horse wearing this Tyrolean hat?

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Oh, well, I let him eat a piece of my Swiss cheese sandwich, and it went to his head.

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You were right. You aren't well.

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Ed.

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The 13th President. Abraham Lincoln?

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Andrew Jackson?

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Zachary Taylor?

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Try Mickey Mouse.

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Who was it?

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Millard Fillmore, born January 7, 1800, died...

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All right, don't rub it in.

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Ed, I'll feel like a fool if I miss an easy question.

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And you can't help me because Carol and the Addisons will be with me.

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Well, don't worry about that.

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Just cancel all of your engagements this week.

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What for?

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I'm going to coach you.

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Ed, I would really appreciate it.

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Cut the corn. Just repeat after me.

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George Washington, born February 27.

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Carol, be sensible.

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Is it worth it? Your husband is driving himself to exhaustion.

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He's been studying every night this week.

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He hasn't slept. He's been skipping meals. He's been...

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Grover, you look tired. Can I get you some coffee?

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Coffee. Brazil. Area. 3,288,050 square miles.

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He's a walking zombie.

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Honey, you skipped dinner. Can I fix you a turkey sandwich?

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Turkey. Republic since 1923.

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Bordered on the west by Greece, Bulgaria, and the Aegean Sea.

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Look what he's going through to win this contest.

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And you want him to throw away that prize money.

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Money. The international rate of exchange.

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In Greece, the currency unit is the drachma.

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In Guatemala, it's the quetzal.

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In Honduras, it's the limpera.

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In Iceland, it...

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Iceland, it's...

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Dried fish.

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Oh, Addison, why don't you leave him alone?

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Alone. The act of lending or a sum of money lent for interest.

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See, interest.

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Honey, maybe you studied enough tonight.

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No, I've got a lot more reading to do, dear.

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If you want me, I'll be in the barn.

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Darling, the barn's over here.

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Morning, Roger. Morning, Kay.

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Nine o'clock at night and he says good morning?

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Is this worth a trip to Europe?

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Europe, a continent with adjacent islands...

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Get your thinking cap on, amigo.

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We're doing Spain.

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Yes, master.

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What is the capital?

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Cap... Capital of Spain.

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Capital of Spain?

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Oh, Ed, Ed, it's no use. I'm worn out.

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Shall I give you a massage?

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Ed, it won't help.

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When that phone rings tomorrow,

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I'll be too tired to think of the answer.

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And with Carol and Addison in the room with me,

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you won't be able to help me.

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Oh, yes, I will.

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Ed, you mean you're going to talk in front of everyone?

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No, it's going to be just you and me in this barn, chum.

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How far is the Earth from the Moon?

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Uh, 250,000 miles.

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Right.

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Uh, what year was Lincoln assassinated?

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1865.

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A month?

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April.

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The day?

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The 14th.

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You want to know what Abe had for dinner?

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Oh, we're a cinch to win tonight, Ed.

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Then I'll take you on the continent, all over.

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Oh, we'll eat like a king.

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In Italy, it'll be a parmesan,

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and France, haute sousette.

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In Germany, carrots, wiener schnitzel.

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Oh, that's what I call eating.

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Wilbur, you've been around that horse so long,

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you're starting to eat like one.

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Hiya, Roger. Pull up a chair.

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Thanks.

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Have a grape.

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No, no, no.

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Wilbur, I've come to appeal to you.

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If you answer that question correctly tonight,

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you may break up a happy marriage.

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Oh, no. Carol loves me.

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I'm talking about my own marriage.

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I'm going to be frank with you.

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I'm not as well off as Kay thinks,

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and if she goes on a spending spree in Europe,

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I'll come home a pauper.

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Please, I happen to know you are loaded.

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Why don't you want to take your wife on a trip to Europe?

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Because I'm not only loaded, I'm stingy.

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Wilbur, this is Mr. Hausner from the Giant Jackpot Show.

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Oh, don't get up, Mr. Post.

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Thank you.

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Mr. Hausner, this is my neighbor, Mr. Edison.

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Mr. Edison, how do you do?

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If you'll excuse me, I have an appointment with the bankruptcy board.

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Mr. Hausner is here to give you last-minute instructions.

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That's right, Mr. Post.

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I want to make sure, first of all,

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that you'll be home at 9 o'clock when we make that big telephone call.

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Oh, don't you worry. I'll be here.

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Honey, would you wake me at, oh, about 5 to 9?

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I'll be taking a little nap.

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Isn't he confident?

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Do you know he has barely looked at a book in two days?

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Once I read something, I never forget it.

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I have total recall.

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Total recall?

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He can't remember what he ate today.

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Just one more reminder, Mr. Post.

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You'll have one minute to answer the question.

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Now then, feel free to use any reference books

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your friends or your wife can help you.

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Oh, thank you. I don't need anybody with me.

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You certainly have the most amazing confidence.

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I just left your competitor, Carl Schultz, at his grocery store,

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and you've never seen a more nervous man.

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Some people have it. Some people don't.

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He's pretty smart with my brains.

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Well, good luck, Mr. Post.

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Thanks, but I won't need it.

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Oh, did I leave my briefcase in your living room, Mrs. Post?

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Briefcase? No, you didn't have any.

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Oh, I must have left it somewhere.

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Well, remember, you will have just 60 seconds

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to come up with the right answer.

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60 seconds for a simple geography question.

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I wonder what I'll do with the extra 59.

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Here, I'll show you out, Mr. Hathaway.

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Thank you.

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Carl.

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Carl, do you think it's all right to come back here?

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Nobody answered the front door. Maybe there's somebody back here.

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But, Carl, maybe we should bring Mr. Hathaway's briefcase to the radio station.

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He must be looking for it.

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But he told us he will be coming here.

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Maybe there's somebody back in the barn. Let's look.

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Nobody answers.

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Oh, what a beautiful horse.

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Carl, if you are lucky enough to win the contest,

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could we buy a little farm and a nice horse like this?

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There you go, dreaming again, Frieda.

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People like us don't have such luck.

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I guess you are right.

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Look at this beautiful house.

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Must be a very smart man, that architect.

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Yes, Frieda, he must be.

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Carl, if we are lucky enough and we win,

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maybe we can send for my mother.

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I haven't seen her in 33 years.

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We'll see, Frieda. We'll see. Come.

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33 years.

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That's a long time not to see your mother.

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Those Soltzers are going to need some help.

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Carol, shouldn't you be waking him?

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They'll be calling in a few minutes.

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Oh, Addison doll, you do want Wilbur to win after all.

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Nobody wants to live next door to a loser.

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Oh, honey, we love Europe.

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Of course, they say travel is very broadening.

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When it comes to money, it can be very flattening.

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Wilbur, it's time.

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Coming, dear.

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Honey, guess what?

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If you win, Roger is coming to Europe with us.

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Well...

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We'll come down to steerage and say hello to you.

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Honey, are you sure you don't want us to go to the barn with you?

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We could look for the answer in the books.

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I'm an expert page-turner.

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I used to date a librarian.

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Thank you, thank you. That won't be necessary.

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At a time like this, I should be alone with my thoughts.

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I'm a lucky girl to be married to such a brilliant man.

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You know, Addison may not be smart, sweetie, but he's loaded.

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Time for company.

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Mrs. Post?

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That's right.

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I'm Charlie Grant from the Jai Jackpot Show.

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I'm here to take some pictures of your husband.

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I'm going to go ahead.

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In a few minutes, that phone's going to ring.

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You'll give the answer,

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and soon you'll be serenading a Spanish filly under her stable window.

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Pull up a chair, Wilbur.

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For you or me?

16:31.720 --> 16:36.720
Wilbur, there comes a time in your life when you have to make sacrifices.

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What do you mean?

16:37.720 --> 16:42.720
33 years is a long, long time not to see your old mother.

16:42.720 --> 16:43.720
What are you talking about?

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Mrs. Post?

16:44.720 --> 16:45.720
Yes?

16:45.720 --> 16:47.720
I'm Charlie Grant from Jai Jackpot.

16:47.720 --> 16:49.720
Oh, yes, well, would you mind waiting in the house?

16:49.720 --> 16:51.720
I'm expecting the call in a few seconds.

16:51.720 --> 16:54.720
That's why I'm here. I'm going to take your picture.

16:54.720 --> 16:56.720
Well, why don't you take it after I win?

16:56.720 --> 16:58.720
I'll have a bigger smile on my face.

16:58.720 --> 17:01.720
Well, no, I'd lose my job if I didn't get a shot of you on the phone.

17:01.720 --> 17:06.720
You better answer it, Mr. Post.

17:06.720 --> 17:08.720
That's $5,000.

17:08.720 --> 17:10.720
Oh, yes, of course.

17:10.720 --> 17:12.720
Hello?

17:12.720 --> 17:17.720
Mr. Post, you have 60 seconds to answer our giant jackpot question.

17:17.720 --> 17:23.720
For $5,000, in what ocean are the Cape Verde Islands?

17:26.720 --> 17:29.720
Cape Verde Islands?

17:34.720 --> 17:37.720
Cape Verde Islands.

17:37.720 --> 17:42.720
The Cape Verde Islands?

17:46.720 --> 17:49.720
Cape Verde Islands.

17:49.720 --> 17:51.720
Just a minute.

17:52.720 --> 17:56.720
Help! Roger, Carol, Katie, help!

17:57.720 --> 18:00.720
Jogging. Where's the jogging people?

18:00.720 --> 18:02.720
Hold on, hold on.

18:02.720 --> 18:03.720
Jogging.

18:03.720 --> 18:05.720
Wait, wait, I...

18:05.720 --> 18:07.720
Jogging. Excuse me.

18:07.720 --> 18:09.720
Jogging.

18:09.720 --> 18:11.720
Jogging.

18:11.720 --> 18:13.720
Jogging.

18:13.720 --> 18:15.720
What's the matter? Huh? What's wrong?

18:15.720 --> 18:17.720
What's the matter? Wilbur, what's happened?

18:17.720 --> 18:20.720
Where are the Cape Verde Islands?

18:20.720 --> 18:22.720
Cape Verde Islands.

18:22.720 --> 18:24.720
Carol, Carol!

18:24.720 --> 18:27.720
Wilbur, Wilbur, which book would have it?

18:27.720 --> 18:30.720
It's in the geography book. Help me find the geography book.

18:30.720 --> 18:32.720
Geography book.

18:32.720 --> 18:34.720
Just a minute.

18:34.720 --> 18:35.720
Geography book.

18:35.720 --> 18:36.720
Don't stand there.

18:36.720 --> 18:37.720
Here.

18:37.720 --> 18:38.720
Go with it.

18:38.720 --> 18:41.720
Mr. Post, you have just 20 seconds.

18:41.720 --> 18:44.720
19, 18, 7...

18:44.720 --> 18:45.720
Hurry!

18:45.720 --> 18:47.720
I've got to get here somewhere.

18:47.720 --> 18:51.720
14, 13, 12, 11...

18:51.720 --> 18:52.720
Quiet!

18:52.720 --> 18:56.720
10, 9, 8, 7, 6...

18:56.720 --> 19:00.720
The Cape Verde Islands are...

19:00.720 --> 19:02.720
in the Pacific Ocean?

19:02.720 --> 19:04.720
Oh, I'm sorry, Mr. Post.

19:04.720 --> 19:06.720
They're in the North Atlantic.

19:10.720 --> 19:11.720
I was wrong.

19:11.720 --> 19:13.720
They're in the North Atlantic.

19:13.720 --> 19:15.720
It's just slightly off.

19:15.720 --> 19:16.720
How far?

19:16.720 --> 19:19.720
$5,000 worth.

19:19.720 --> 19:23.720
Mr. Post, it's all about a big smile.

19:25.720 --> 19:28.720
Wouldn't you rather have an honest picture of a man crying?

19:28.720 --> 19:29.720
Thanks a lot.

19:29.720 --> 19:31.720
Better luck next time.

19:31.720 --> 19:33.720
Oh, Addison.

19:33.720 --> 19:34.720
Don't you fret, my dear.

19:34.720 --> 19:37.720
I'll take you on a trip real soon.

19:37.720 --> 19:39.720
Where to, Big Daddy?

19:39.720 --> 19:41.720
Cucamonga?

19:41.720 --> 19:43.720
Why don't you kids come over for coffee in a few minutes?

19:43.720 --> 19:46.720
I should be over my nervous breakdown by then.

19:53.720 --> 19:54.720
Oh, never mind, honey.

19:54.720 --> 19:56.720
We'll take a trip someday.

19:56.720 --> 19:58.720
Yeah, but not to the Cape Verde Islands.

19:58.720 --> 20:00.720
Why don't you give Kay a hand?

20:00.720 --> 20:01.720
I'll be right here.

20:01.720 --> 20:02.720
All right.

20:10.720 --> 20:12.720
Ed, why did you turn your back on me?

20:12.720 --> 20:13.720
It wasn't my fault.

20:13.720 --> 20:15.720
I know you were looking forward to taking this trip,

20:15.720 --> 20:17.720
but I couldn't get rid of the photographer.

20:17.720 --> 20:19.720
And about that geography book,

20:19.720 --> 20:21.720
what do you suppose could have happened to it?

20:24.720 --> 20:25.720
Where is it?

20:27.720 --> 20:29.720
Ed, why did you hide it?

20:29.720 --> 20:31.720
We might have won.

20:31.720 --> 20:33.720
I did it for Carl and Freda.

20:33.720 --> 20:36.720
Carl and Freda? Who are they?

20:36.720 --> 20:38.720
Well, that's a long story.

20:38.720 --> 20:41.720
As I said, there comes a time in your life

20:41.720 --> 20:44.720
when you have to make sacrifices.

20:44.720 --> 20:49.720
This old couple, she hasn't seen her mother in 33 years.

20:49.720 --> 20:51.720
I've just got to care about her.

20:53.720 --> 20:57.720
Ed, here's a picture of the Schultzes accepting the $5,000.

20:57.720 --> 20:59.720
They're cute.

20:59.720 --> 21:02.720
You're not sore at me, are you, Wilbur?

21:02.720 --> 21:04.720
Of course not.

21:04.720 --> 21:06.720
It was a nice thing you did,

21:06.720 --> 21:09.720
making it possible for Mrs. Schultz to bring her mother over.

21:09.720 --> 21:11.720
I always was a softie.

21:15.720 --> 21:17.720
A horse is a horse, of course, of course

21:17.720 --> 21:19.720
And no one can talk to a horse, of course

21:19.720 --> 21:23.720
That is, of course, unless the horse is the famous Mr. Ed

21:23.720 --> 21:25.720
Go right to the source and ask the horse

21:25.720 --> 21:27.720
He'll give you the answer that you endorse

21:27.720 --> 21:29.720
He's always on a steady course

21:29.720 --> 21:31.720
Talk to Mr. Ed

21:31.720 --> 21:34.720
Heeple yakity yak, he'll streak and waste your time a day

21:34.720 --> 21:38.720
But Mr. Ed will never speak unless he has something to say

21:38.720 --> 21:40.720
A horse is a horse, of course, of course

21:40.720 --> 21:42.720
And this one will talk to his voice, his horse

21:42.720 --> 21:44.720
You never heard of a talking horse?

21:46.720 --> 21:48.720
Well, listen to this!

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I am Mr. Ed

21:55.720 --> 22:18.720
This has been a Filmways television presentation