PLAYBOY

FEBRUARY 1964 * 75 CENTS

SPECIAL JAZZ & HI-FI ISSUE

WINNERS IN PLAYBOY JAZZ POLL
THE LATEST IN HI-FI EQUIPMENT
THE PLAYBOY RECORD LIBRARY

PLAYBOY PANEL ON JAZZ TODAY
AND TOMORROW WITH STAN KENTON,
DIZZY GILLESPIE, DAVE BRUBECK,
GERRY MULLIGAN AND OTHERS

PLUS MAMIE VAN DOREN UNADORNED
BOUDOIR FUN WITH RICHARD BURTON
A NEW NOVEL BY P. G. WODEHOUSE

On your trip to Spain, drop by Los Caracoles. There you'll find Canadian Club, The Best In The Hous

9 in 87 lands.

©1964 кинам WALKER IMPORTERS INC.

Senor Bofarull of Barcelona greets you
with a fine sense of gusto and Canadian Club

Los Caracoles, “The Snails,” has
won the esteem of travelers who
make no bones about enjoying life.
The sea food is eaten on tooth-
picks, the welkin rings with laugh-
ter, and the Canadian Club, to the
satisfaction of all, is omnipresent.

The engaging host of Los Caracoles
believes that if you relish life's pl
ures you show it.

His exhilaration attracts the world
traveler to Escudillers 14, in Barcelon:
The walls are festooned with garlic
clusters, the air cl Iwith gaiety, and.
the Canadian Club forever in demand.
Why this whisky's universal popular-
ity? It has the lightness of
the smooth satisfaction of Bourbon. No
like Cana
with it all evening

other whisky tastes
You can stay long
— in short ones before dinner, in tall
lian Club—world's

tonight.

ones afte iy
lightest whisk)

WALKER а SONS LIMI
WAUKERVILLE, CANADA

Wherever you go, there it is!

Y

SHARKEY

PLAYBI L NEVER ONE. togive
short shrift to

chronologically short-changed February,
PLAYBOY has pleasure-packed the month
marked by the natal days of Washi
Lincoln and (appropriately enou
this leap. year) Susan B. Anthony. The
woman suffragist would be proud, indeed,
of cover girl (her third appearance) C
thia Maddox, Our Assistant
Editor, now in her fifth year here at
rLAYBOY, has garnered many a ballot
from readers as the girl they would most
like to be alone with in a voting booth.
The rravsoy puppet blowing sweet
nothings into Miss Maddox” car imagi
tively indicates that this month's cdi-
torial horn of plenty has a musical lilt
10 it. Along with the results of our
eighth annual Jazz Poll (accompanied
by an over-the-shoulder look at the past
year's jazz by eminent musi
cologist Nat Hentoff), we offer a Playboy
Panel on Jazz — Today and Tomorrow,
indsively moderated by critic Hentoff,
that should dispel once and for all the.
baseless putdown that jazz musicians can
articulate only with their music. The
better to hear their music, we also pre
sent Sounds of '6f, handsome get
together of the latest in hi-fi gear custom
tailored to the size of your pad. Here,
too, is The Playboy LP Library, a listing
of 300 of our favorite recordings soundly
suited to any mood.
Going from the sublime to the ridicu-
lous, James Ransom in Joe Meets Sam.
delivers a noteworthy parody of the jazz-
LP linernote meshugaas in which the
prime concern is to fill up the arca back-
ing the front cover with verbiage of
nformational, pscudo-hip, surface-

BLOOM

deep insights. Author Ransom, who
holds a Ph.D. in English philology, spent
ten years as an editor of books on med-
ical and surgical subjects. His scalpel
of liner-note jazz jargon should leave
the reader in stitches. One of the most
recent additions to the rLAvnov stall, As-
sistant Editor Jack Sharkey, who has con-
tributed to our pages in the past, has
his first ollering since making our mast-
head, a punny Valentine, Lady Luck and
the Lyricisl. In it, spare-time composer-
lyricist Sharkey (he's writing a Broadway
musical, only Broadway doesn't know
about it yet) describes how famous so
smiths stumbled across their best linc:

February's fictive boi
old friend, one of Blighty’s blithest spi
its, Р. С. Wodehouse. He's back with us,
inimitably unraveling Part I of a xaffish
new two-part novel of comic desperation
inhe nce,

aza includes an

born of a struggle over
Biffen’s Millions. Comedy in a different
п sulfuses Jack Raphael Guss’ Where
Does It Say in Freud that a Shrink Has
to Be Polite?; his antic verbal duel be-
tween a Negro patient and his white
psychiatrist is etched in an acid bath of
racial undercurrents, Author Guss, a
toiler in Hollywood's TV purlieus, is
associate produce scripter
ol Channing, a
series. There are no laughs, howe
The Nightmare, by famed novelist Pat
Frank. A hair-white n of an im-
pending international holocaust, The
Nightmare has been penned by a man
well versed in such matters. Author of
Mr. Adam, Alas, Babylon and the non-
fiction How to Survive the H-Bomb —
and Why, Pat F
the Defense Department. No less cmi-

k is a consultant to

FRANK

nent in his own field, Murray Te
Bloom, founder of the Society of M.
zine Writers, has contributed to almost
every leading publication
considers himself one of the world's lead-
ing "collectors" of imaginative criminals,

covey of whom form the theme for his
initial PrAvmov endeavor, The Money-
grabbers.

Eyegrabbing pictorials, past, present,
at home and abroad,
sprinkled throughout this issue: Jn Bed

with Becket. a rollicking between-the-
scenes and between-the-sheets boudoir
romp with Richard Burton, Peter

O'Toole and a sensational Gallic gamine,
Veronique Vendell; Playmates Revisited
— 1954, a richly rewarding reprise of
atefold girls from rrAvnov's first year;
nd Mamie, in which the famed frame
of Mamie Van Doren is displayed on-
stage, en repos and unaccoutered
Meanwhile,
own Shel Silverstei

nues his car
toonic tour, Silverstein’s History of Play-

coni

boy. Continuing, too, are the life and
times of the comedic world's contentious
conscience, Lenny Bruce, in his How to
Talk Dirty and Influence People. Also
on hand is a further installment. of
Editor-Publisher Hugh М. Hefner's
Playboy Philosophy.

Filling out February's luminous edi-
torial line-up: Nancy Jo Hooper, a
Playmate for all seasons, Don Addis
droll Symbolic Sex, and pair of fresh-
засаа clothing features, The Hippest of
Squares (the new look in pocket hand-
kexchiefs) and The Hide of Fashion, on
Jeather-accented garb for the guy about
town. With un-sized aggregate
for a pint-sized month.

vol. 11, no. 2 — february, 1964

PLAYBOY.

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CONTENTS FOR THE MEN'S ENTERTAINMENT MAGAZINE

РГА УБИ АЕ ан
DEAR PLAYBOY... 5
PLAYBOY AFTER HOURS.

19

THE PLAYBOY АОМІЗОЕ

PLAYBOY'S INTERNATIONAL DATEBOOK—trav PATRICK CHASE 27
THE PLAYBOY PANEL: JAZZ—TODAY AND TOMORROW—discussion
THE PLAYBOY ЕОВШМ a
HUGH M. HEFNER 45
SHEL SILVERSTEIN 48

NAT HENTOFF 59

THE PLAYBOY PHILOSOPHY—editorial. _

SILVERSTEIN'S HISTORY OF PLAYBOY—humor.
THE 1964 PLAYBOY ALL-STARS—jazz..
THE PLAYBOY LP LIBR ARY—modern living. =. 09
P. G. WODEHOUSE 70
JAMES RANSOM 73
TO,

BIFFEN'S MILLIONS—novel.
JOE MEETS SAM—satire__. T
IN BED WITH BECKET—pictorial..

THE NIGHTM ARE—! PAT FRANK ВЗ

THE HIDE OF FASHION—attire ———— eee ROBERT L GREEN 87

WHERE DOES IT SAY IN FREUD? —fiction JACK RAPHAEL GUSS 91
GEORGIA PEACH—playboy's playmate of the month... = a 92
PLAYBOY'S PARTY JOKES—humor. — — УВ.

THE MONEYGRABBERS-—article.......

SOUNDS OF '64—moder living... 105
SYMBOLIC SEX—humor mi
MAMIE—pictorial = ae = 113

LADY LUCK AND THE LYRICIST—humor. 6 JACK SHARKEY 121

ANGELIQUE'S DELIGHTFUL DECEPTION—ribald classic = . 123

ROBERT L. GREEN 124

THE HIPPEST OF SQUARES—ottire...........
HOW TO TALK DIRTY AND INFLUENCE PEOPLE—autobiography...IENNY BRUCE 126
129

PLAYMATES REVISITED—1954—pictorial..

ниси м. HEFNER editor and publisher
А. €. SPECTORSKY associate publisher and editorial director
ARTHUR PAUL art director

JACK J. KESSIE managing editor VINCENT T. TAJIRI picture editor
FRANK DE BLOIS, MURRAY NAT LEHRMAN, SHELRON wax associate editors;
помену t. GREEN fashion director; payin TAYLOR associate fashion editor; THOMAS
Marto food & drink editor; PATRICK CHASE travel editor; J. PAUL GETTY consulting,
editor, business & finance; CHAKI2S BEAUMONT. KD СЫМА. PAUL KRASSNEN,
KEN w. тшу contributing editors: ARLENE HOURAS copy chief; SVAN AMBER copy
editor; MICHAL LAURENCE, JACK SHARKEY, RAY WILLIAMS assistant editors; BEV
CHAMBERLAIN associate picture editor; BONNIE вомк assistant picture editoi; MARIO
CASI, HARRY O'ROURKE, гомгго POSAR, JERRY VULSMAN staf) photographers; FRANK
БСК, STAN MALINOWSKI conlribuling photographers; FRED GLasve models’ stylist;
REID AUSTIN associate art director; KON BLUME, JOSEPH. PACZEK assistant art direc
tors; WALTER KRADENVCH art assistant; CYNTA MADDON assistant cartoon editar;
JOHN мазтко production manager; FERN WEAKTEL assistant production manager +
HOWARD w. LEDERER advertising director; JULES KASE eastern advertising manager;
Jostrn FALL midwestern advertising manager; yoseru GUENTHER Detroit advertir
ing manager: NELSON FUTCH promotion director; nx CZUBAK promotion art direc-
tor; MELMUY Lorscu publicity manager; BENNY DUNN public relations manager;
ANSON MOUNT college bureau; THEO FREDERICK personnel director; JANET

reader service; Warrer nowarrii subscription fulfillment manager; Y
SELLERS special projects; иовкит rukuss business manager & circulation director.

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DEAR PLAYBOY

EJ ^оскеѕ5 PLAYBOY MAGAZINE + 232 E. OHIO ST., CHICAGO, ILLINOIS 60611

VIZ. VISIONS

The three articles on hallucinogenic
drugs in the November issue arc the
most perceptive and sober considerations
of the pros and cons of these controver-
sial substances in the popular magazines
that have come to my attention. Other
similar articles, for the most part, have
been sensationalized and distorted.
PLAYBOY is to be congratulated.

Walter H. Clark

Professor of Psychology of Religion

Andover Newton Theological School

Newton Centre, Massachusetts

Allow me to congratulate you on one
of the most keenly perceptive LSD
studies that I have seen. The accom-
plishments of Alpert and Leary have
been underestimated. I think something
more could be said about the promise
of hallucinogens with respect to frigidity.
In over 200 experimental cases last year,
students given LSD had intercourse and
reported. in almost every instance, a
“heightened sense of unity.” The only
trouble was that afterward, alarmingly,
many of these young men and women
—about 35 percent, almost all of whom
were men— came out with feelings of
reversed sexuality.

Most of the men were soon returned to
normalcy by a hot shower and several
showings of Guadalcanal Diary. The sev-
cral women involved were given The
Second Sex to read.

K. Kenniston
Boston, Massachusetts

Congratulations on your three-article
coverage of LSD and the general issue
of experiential education and internal
freedom, Recently, ten national maga-
zines have carried stories on the “magic
of LSD.” rrAYsoY's interpretation was
the most thorough and accurate. Indeed,
yours was the only attempt to make an
objective appraisal of this new and com-
plex form of neurological energy. All of
the other magazine pieces (Time ex-
cepted) were written by staff writers or
unknown journeymen assigned to turn
out a “danger” yarn. Only pLaYboY used
articles by well-known and successful
authors (Aldous Huxley, Dan Wakefield,

€Káú—=——__——
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PLAYEOY, FEERUARY, 1964, VOL
232 E. оно ST., CHICAGO, ILLINOI
CANADA, $17 FOR THREE YEARS,

ALLOW 30 DAYS FCR NEW SUB

п, по. 2

'IFTIONS AND RENEWALS.

ADVERTISING DIRECTOR. JULES KASE, EASTERN
MU 8-3030; BRANCH OFFICES: CHICAGO, PLAYBOY
MANAGER: DETROIT. BOULEVARD WEST

MY SIN

...a most
provocative perfume!

Alan Harrington) whose secure reputa-
tions allowed them to write what they
belicved.
Congratulations, too, for Playboy's
Philosophy. These days it seems that
yours is almost the only attempt to speak
out for such basic human strivings as
spontaneous fun, individual freedom,
and the more tender and direct forms of
human communication. While millions
of dollars are spent each year to increase
technological efficiency, external comfort.
and otherdirected conformity, it is in-
ingly dificult to find a voice de-
ng the ancient values of direct
experience and intimacy.

IFIF was organized a year ago by sci-
entists from Harvard and neighboring
universities to encourage research in such
taboo areas as voluntary expansion of
consciousness, production of ecstatic and
religious states, development of the play-
ful aspects of experience. In these gloomy
times when “danger” and “fear” seem to
be the politically popular mottos, we
consider PLAYBOY a most happy and ap-
propriate title. We applaud your effective
program to lighten and enlighten the
human situation.

Richard Alpert, Ph.D.
Timothy Leary, Ph.D.
Ralph Metzner, Ph.D.
International Federation for
Internal Freedom
Cambridge, Massachusetts

Three cheers for pLAYBov for your
intelligent and perceptive pieces on hal
lucinogenic drugs in your November
issue! After having read and heard so
much dull-witted and bigoted tripe on
hallucinogenic drugs and Messrs. Alpert
and Leary, it was indeed refreshing to
read your open-minded, sane articles.

I hâve had the opportunity to expand
my self-knowledge morning-glory
seeds and I am interested in the fact
that an organization exists whose mem-
bers have had similar revelations. Could
you give me the address of the Interna-
tional Federation for Internal Freedom?

Jean-Pierre Perini
Garden Grove, California

IFIF is headquartered at 14 Slory

Street, Cambridge, Massachusetis.

via

LANVIN
thle prime ia das tf

Purse size $3; Spray Mist $5;
Toilet Water from $3; (plus tax)

1000, JOE FALL, MIDWESTERN ADVERTISING
I SUTTER ST., YU 2.7984,

5

PLAYBOY

LABOR DISPUTE
PLAYBOY's November interview was
quite a letdown from some of the ex-
ccllent ones of the past. It revealed more
of the interviewer than Holta. With his
premises showing, your man displayed
an antilabor bias that was both crude
and surprising for a magazine which has
taken such a hip s n the field of
men's apparel, dri naked
women, applied sex, etc. jewpoint —
to apply two of the most horrible epithets
in PLAYbOY's lexicon — was Victorian.
extremely square. He sounded like a
vestigator for some Congressi
labor" committee who had a job to do.
Perhaps he did, indirectly? Poi i
stick journalism and labor don't mix.
John Starks
Brooklyn, New York

I hope Mr. Hoffa is not naive cnough
10 think the general public swallowed
that.

Robert H. Kutz
Meadville, Р

sylvania

I think the рглувоү interviewer has
more than shown his ability to obtain a
clear picture of an individual through
his own words. In response to PLAYBOY’s
rather pointed questions, Jimmy Holla
showed his unwillingness to clarify many
of the more questionable aspects of his
on leadership, notably, Ш
tions of criminal affiliations and misma
agement of the union. It seems to th
PLAYBOY reader tha ice Depart-
ment's recent. n of interest.
in Mr. Hoffa's affairs was long overd
I am sure that Bobby Kennedy bought
copies of this issue for all the Teamsters
who, they get past the November
Playmate, will be interested. in what
their leader had to say, or rather, what
he had not to say.

Henri L. Barré

New York State School of Industrial
and Labor Relations

Cornell University

Ithaca, New York

accusa-

GO NORTH, YOUNG MEN
You've done it "Three eager
оз" for November's The Girls of
Canada. Leave it to the гілувоу stall to
capture the beauty of the opposite sex!
The delightful pics were enough to make
male quit his job, run to his travel
age north,
dano
Madison, Wiscoi

“|

It was with great за that Y
noted your discovery of the world’s finest
collection of women, Canadians! We in
а sometimes feel that you Ame
are not fully aware of Canada's ex-
istence. The Girls of Canada certainly

proclaims our existence. May I also add
that it is quite often a very pl
existence, After all, what do you th
really do on those long winter nights?

1 have jus
Faust by Willia

igan
Cincinnati, Ohio

William Тениз story, Bernie the
Faust, is a real gasser. 105 the most en-
joyable and the most up-to-date — in fact,
ahead-of-date — extrapolation of the
Faustus story I've ever read. It's a theme
most writers have tackled one way or an-
other at one time or another, but Tenn
triple-twist treatment, with one gimmick
topping another and then itself being
topped, tops anythin

Come to think of it,
too. В.
top.

Fredric Brown
"Tucson, Arizona

BRUCEOPHILES
Alter reading Parts I and IT of Lenny
Bruce's autobiography, I hereby recom-
mend that Lenny give up performing
and take up serious writing as a carcer.
This boy can write half the alleged pro-
fessional writers under the table, He
great, great talent and pLavuo is to be
congratulated for printing his stuff.
Joc Brody.
New York, New York

CONGRATULATIONS ON
BRUCE SERIES. IT IS THE BEST. NG ANY
MAGAZINE HAS DONE IN YEARS.
TERRY зоот
NEW CANAAN,
Our and the author's thanks to bright
young writer Southern,

YOUR LENNY

N
CONNECTICUT

What a crime not to get this ki
Bruce more often. All the cl

по;

x псе of Henry Miller,
and i

genius of Durrell
rolled into one, with humor yet!

1 frankly was hung on his every word.
I memorized s ges for retelling
(professionally, of course) and I went
back in memory and retrospect to my
childhood where 1 encountered such a
parallel in upbringing, character

tives and clichéd events that it was
frightening!

Being à champion of Lenny B., as he
will readily admit, it's oft difficult to сх-

plain to the average lay bísiro-goer why
his brilliance onstage is taken up with
observations on the v 1 functions of

PURE
GENIUS

Devoid of vibrato, spartan in
its simplicity, his playing is
anartist's eloquent statement
about the world in which he
lives. One critic called it

“deathly in its purity?’ Another
described it as having “the
virginal clarity of a Sistine
choirboy.” Miles himself sai

“Don’t write about the music.
It speaks for itself.”

It does. You can hear it in
his new album, Quiet Nights.
Listen to the textured Brazil-
ian rhythms of “Corcovado.”
Or the sweet, pure sound of
his horn on “Wait Till You
See Her” and “Once Upona
Summertime.” It is pure art.

MILES DAVIS
ON COLUMBIA
RECORDS

Y

BON HUNSTEIN

PLAYBOY

Have you heard this girl sing?

‘This is Nancy Wilson.

She is the most original popular singer performing today. The
praise Nancy has received from critics and public alike is ample proof.

But listen to Nancy Wilson yourself. When she sings, you hear the
sure and expressive voice of an accomplished singer. And you feel the
moods and emotions of a fine blues singer. But more than that, you
hear the fascinating way she blends her voice and her sensitivity into
a new way of singing every kind of popular song. Whatever the album,
whatever the song, from “When Sunny Gets Blue” to “Happy Talk”
to "Days of Wine and Roses; Nancy Wilson is new and different and
exciting to listen to.

Listen to Nancy Wilson on Capitol, and you'll hear what we mean.

For a start, listen to these newest Nancy Wilson albums:

NANCY WILSONHOLLVWOOD MY WAY | ТЕН ҮН | BROADWAY-MY WAY

За. NANCY WILSON (Se
й М, 4

(S)T 1934 (ST 1657 (5771828

the teste
nuns, and Soph

from
Tucker's blatant affairs
with Puerto Rican busboys.

But such is the Brucian way and so
must he go. Lenny deals in honest shock,
free form and improvisational therapy,
but ofttimes his ramblings back him into
a comedic trap, and he sums up or escapes
inarticulately. That's why his writings
are pure delight. His recall and humor
are incisive and his form is brilliant.
Without the staring urgency of that ugly
demanding animal “the i
which Lenny truly abhors, he has
to ponder, think
pure written gold!

Jack Carter
Los Angeles, California

Kudos from fellow comic Carter is

certainly most welcome.

adie:

ne
ain and lay down

HUFF OVER HUBBY

Eve just finished reading William
Iversews article in the September issue,
Love, Death and the Hubby [mu
While E ag h about 75 percent ol
his conclusions and loved his marvelous
wpoint is slightly
midtcen wile and
ш. and
Though
my income is jointly earned with my
husband, he has all the say on how it
will be spent, and how much. For
stance, our one car is eight years old,
and whi t that it
“It
Well, barely, If

doesn't
1 write a check for
20 clams, there is
is not extraordinary; he is quite
1 haven't a friend whose husband
the boss of the ménage, and to ask
those "boys" to run а lawnmower or
sweep out a garage or dig a weed is tl
utmost blasphemy, and darc not
repeated. (They're very handy at yel
at the help, though, Гуе noticed, and
ting the help to quit right in the
) And when you
gift at Christmas
id birthdays, there is urgent s
of papers to see how much you spent
on them. And most of the women 1
know c insurance on their own lives
— big chunks— paid for by themselves
1 favor of that poor Hubby Mr.
veeps over. (One bastard 1
know, in receipt of his work-worn wife's
life insurance — 200,000 dams for which
she paid out of money her mother left
her—rushed out and spent the whole
r on a dirty

damn bu

little floozy, and then, in exhaustion,

clined on his children for his support)
Taylor Caldwell
Buflalo, New York

ess im one y

PLAYBOY AFTER HOURS

pplaud the progressive position
occi ta Ливно ure
can Automobile Association, which re-
cently hailed the rising hemlines of
women’s skits and called for more of
the same. "Auto headlights,” explained a
spokesman, “readily pick up the stockings
or bare legs of women pedestrians at

night. Naturally, the more stocking or leg

for motorists to
spot them and thus prevent an accident.”
With this bit of intelligence in mind, we
pulled out our slide rule and came up
with the following computations: If in
one year in a given area there are X
number of nocturnal accidents involving
women pedestrians wearing knee-length
dresses, then the new thigh-high skirts,
exposing, say, two more inches of leg (or
three percent of the average woman's
total epidermis), should proportionately
reduce the number of traffic accidents
during the same period. To carry our
computations further: If all women in
the same area wore shorts (exposing ten
percent more skin), the accident total
would be proportionately reduced to an
unprecedented low. The obvious con-
clusion does not require additional com-
putation: one hundred percent bare flesh
equals perfect safety records —all of
which would to substantiate the
wellknown assertion that you can prove
anything with statistics.

exposed the c;

seem

Bargain hunters in search of service-
able secondhand merchandise are re-
ferred to the following notice in the
Lake Worth (Florida) Herald: “ror
sake: The ladies of the First Presbyterian
Church have discarded clothing of all
kinds. They may be seen in the church
basement any day after six o'clock."

The Philadelphi

Bar Association's

journal reports a prudish premarital di
rective on a sign spotted in the city's
Marriage License Bureau. It reads: po
NOT LAY ANYTHING ON THE DESK.

Members of the National Sign Watch-
lso be interested in the
following sightings which were reported
to us recently. Spotted above a well-used
street door in the downtown Chicago
complex of Loyola University: EMER-
GENCY AND FIRE ENTRANCE ONLY: on
fire door at Harvard University: хот
AN ACCREDITED EGRESS: amd on a fence
on Washington Island, Wisconsin: IRES-
PASSERS WILL DE

VIOLATED.

Women's f. Cole of Cali-
fornia has just unveiled au ultraform-
fitting one-piece bathing suit designed
with derriere décolletage and a zipper up
the front. “Ifa girl hasn't caught her man
when vacation is drawing to a close," the
manufacturer suggested in an interview
with the fashion editor of the San Fran-
cisco Chronicle, "she can gradually lower
the zipper a little bit more cach day.

shion note

We can't help wondering how many
applicants responded to the following
Help Wanted” ad in a recent issue of
the usually staid New York Times
to Pres. Advertising Agency. Must put
out for busy exec. 5125."

A friend of ours got two Government
communiqués the other day and dropped
by to show them to us. One was from
the Post Office; it urged him to use
ZIP numbers in addressing his mail. The
other was from the Internal Revenue
Service's District Director; it urged him
to pay a tax bill that was due, but failed
to provide a ZIP number— or even a
good old-fashioned zone number— in

noting the address to which his remit
tance should be sent (Form 17, in case
there are any Feds around who would
like to check). We suggested to our bud-
dy that he send the unzipped tax boyos
the P.O. notice and the Post Office guys
the unpaid tax notice. He conceded the

ic good
sense, promptly left our office with high
purpose and a properly subversive gleam
in his eye.

idea made some sort of

poe!

How Times Have Changed Depari-
ment, Literary Division: Afternoon Men,
а 1931 novel by Britain's Anthony
Powell, published in this country for the
months ago,
this vintage piece of erotic prose, which
we pass on for the possible interest of
those gentle readers for whom the carnal
candor of. contemporary fiction may have
begun to pall: “Slowly, but very delib-
erately, the brooding edifice of seduction,
creaking and incongruous, came into
being st Heath Robinson mecha
ism, dually controlled by them and
lumbering down vistas of triteness. With
а sort of “heavy. fisted dexterity, the mu
tally adapted emotions of each of them
became synchronized, until the unavoid-
able anticlimax was at hand. Later they
dined restaurant quite near the flat.

fust time a few contains

Add to our list of Unlikely Couple:
Marie and Woodrow Wilson, Loi па
Admiral Nelson. Fifi and Quai d'Orsay,
Lena and Flügel Horn, Julia Ward and
James Wong Howe, Dean and Holland
Rusk, Nelson and Mary Baker Eddy,
Molly and Arthur Goldberg, and that tor-
rid team, Elizabeth and Zachary Taylor.

Reasuring anatomical intelligence
from the Ohio Department of Agricul-
ture’s weekly summary of news on the

PLAYBOY

10

you can try
it like this

or buy it like this
E

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pork market: "Butts showed the only
advance and bellies held steady.”

THEATER

The Private Ear and The Public Eye are
а pair of short stories done up in d
log, a crisp package from Peter Shaffer.
British author of Five Finger Exercise.
The Private Ear is a sentimental kitchen
fable about a shy clerk (Brian Bedford)
who is devoted to music, his dashing
buddy (Barry Foster) who is devoted to
women, and the girl (Geraldine McEwan)
whom the derk brings home to sup:
per (cooked by his friend, the wolf). The
situation is old-fashioned, but Shaffer
works some newfangled variations, and
the actors are delightful. The Public
Eye is a screwball cartoon about an
outrageously unprivate detective named
Cristoforo who favors tan shoes,
broad-stripe suit, yellow tic, trench coat.
raisins, nuts and yogurt. “This is one
of the few jobs where being nondescript

is an advantage," he sincerely. A
stodgy accountant has hired this gro-
tesque, sight unseen, to shadow his
young wife whom he suspects of hig

jinkery with other men. Up to then
she has been guilty only of an abnormal
interest in horror movies, but now finds
herself irresistibly drawn to the gum-
shoc— and no wonder, for as played
with devilish hilarity by Barry Foster.
Cristoforou is a mad, sid clown who is
forced to live his pi e life in thc
public eye. At the Morosco, 217 West
A5th Street.

Chips with Everything begins like an
English No Time for Sergeants. The
draftees droop into the barracks. The

until it is every bit as bitter as Brecht.
. Arnold Wesker is ra a hard
п'5 rigid social structure.
protest. play — didactical, but
П. Wesker's Brita -miniature
peacetime Royal Air Force. Pip
Bond) the son of a general, is
trying to climb down from the upper
class and mix with the masses. But the
masses mock him, his accent and his
while his superiors— ће R.
officers — indulge him. They know that,
given enough time, and rope, Pip will
rise to the proper level. As for Pip,
he scorns the officers and tries to save
the soldiers, but he doesn't quite know.
how to go about it. “АП you do is breed
eat chips [potatoes] with
he telis his bunkmatcs
In the end, of cou

in spite of himself. The la
God Save the Queen. The troops pass

smartly in review, stiffly saluting their
smug superiors. But Wesker is a long
way from waving the flag. He is thumb-
ing his nose at those in command and
giving a sad cheer for those who never
can be. At the Plymouth, 236 West 45th
Street.

In Luther, John Osborne has tackled a
profoundly religious theme on an epic
scale; the story sweeps boldly across
Europe and through pre-Protestant his-
tory in a pageant of scenes— but its
spirit is modern. Osborne's Luther is not
so much a religious heretic as a king-
size revolu ing against injustice
= im this case, the corruption of the
secularized Church in the 16th Century.
He is obsessed, but isn't always sure
what he is obsessed by: his desire to be
his own man on his own terms, his
cramped digestive system or his over-
whelming belief od, in the Bible
as the Word of God and in the Church
hierarchy as God’s misrepresentatives on
earth, Soon it is clear that, for the
author, Luther's physical and psycho-
logical disorders are symbols of the great

Ys religious torments, apt symbols,
пег.
making his Droadway
debut, powerfully personi

he

ground and writhes
nermost agonies. By focusing on M

the man, Osborne may have missed Mar-
tin the saint, but the figure is moving,
and terpreted by Finney, it is a

towering figure on any stage. At the St.
James, 246 West 44th Stres

MOVIES

Ir's happened: An American has made
a fine, fine film —one that may ever
tually rank with world standouts. It's Dr.
Strangelove: or How I learned to Stop Worry-
ing and Love the Bomb. Stanley Kubrick,
who made the graphic Paths of Glory

and the oftbrilliant Lolita, has hit a
stride here that puts him big-leagues
1 of the overblown Hollywood

» Wyler, Hawks) as well
nd-they-should-stay-there
cinemadmen. Kubrick also col-
scripting this scorching
re with Terry Southern and Peter
George from George's novel Red Alert.
It's related to the Ра: Заје idea (which
it preceded): a U.S. nuclear-bomber at-
tack gets unle and then
at? It starts when a fi general de-
ме the Commies — and,
g his airfield, commits
ide without revealing the recall codc
es place while

arty
laborated in

the planes are en route to Russia. All
but one are shot down by the Reds — with
apologetic American help — but the one
that gets through brings about, shall we
say, the conclusion. The action takes
place mostly in the generals office (l
aptly named Jack D. Ripper) the
key bomber; in the Pentagon war room.
Peter Sellers plays three roles riotously:
an R.A.F. type attached to Ripper's stal
the President of uic U.S. (called Mer
Muflley ently as a ribald private
joke between the scriptwriters and any-
one in the audience who may appreciate
erudite erotica): and Dr. Suangelove, a
pseudonymous German who is the brains
of our nuclear program — а weirdo with
false arm that gets away from him and
ceps flying up in Hitler Heils. Sterling
Hayden is the fanatic, George C. Scout
tops as a top Air Force general,
and Keenan Wynn is fittingly удере
in the role of Colonel " Guano.
Kubrick keeps the film straight and
ficrce and savage, searing through the
sacred cows— and bull — оГ deterrents,

world has, figuratively, locked itself in-
side a runaway bomber. It's not enough

to pr in mak-
ing this film, bec so much
in it of film wizardry. A lot ol it is
very funny, but who's laugl

Akira Kurosawa, one of the best direc
tors going, has made a detective film
that goes. High and tow, set in Yokohama,
a fast-moving 2 hours and 23 min-
utes about а kidnap caper. А shoe-com-
pany executive, in the middle of a power
fight in his company, has put himself
heavily in hock to buy stock. Just when
he's about to make his move, hi.
feur's son is kidnaped and held for ran-
som; the exec feels responsible, because
the criminal thought it was his son. Any-

у, it’s a child's life; so he pays the
ansom. loses the stock and his job. and
puts himself in debt to get the kid
‘Then the Yoko! hawkshaws make
their move— and the film becomes a
contest between hunters and hunted.
Toshiro Mifune, the in Yojimbo
and Sanjuro, is doughty and dynamic as
the exec Tatsuya N whom Mi-
fune killed in his last two pictures, is a
plenty hip detective. But the star of the
show (and always billed as such in Japan)
is Kurosawa himself, a director whose
al and whose dr: ic sense is.
1. The film leaves us wonder-
ing why a man who can do so much
(Пати, Rashomon, The Seven Samurai)
is content to do so little (a script adapted
from an nerican thriller by Ed Mc
Bain). 501, when Kurosawa plays cops
and robbers, it's bound to be arresti

The Polish film industry has been
industriously polishing itself up since

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PLAYBOY

16

the War, and the few pictures that have
slipped in here from under the Iron Cur-
tain have shown cinema sense, if not orig-
inality. Their State Film School has been
g out graduates like Polish sau-
age. Now one of the graduates, Roma
Polanski, has his first film on view here.
Knife in the Water is highly derivative; it's
covered with thumbprints of French and
Italian directors. And it could easily be
condensed. But—a very big but— it
is a wonderfully well-made film on a
subde subject: a middle-aged husband's
fear of sexual competition. A fortyish
man and his young wife, driving to a lake
lor a weekend on their sailboat,
good-looking youth a lift. The husb:
resents, implicitly, the youth's youth, and
he senses the challenge to his marriage.
Out of pique, because he is a good sailor,
he invites the hitchhiker aboard for the
weekend to show him up. Nicely devised
drama proves the lubber a lover; the
husband gets cuckolded without knowing
it. With only three actors, and almost.
all the action on the relatively small
boat, Polanski keeps the eye intrigued
and (most of the time) the male ego cn-
gaged. With his first feature, this Pole
vaults to the head of the class.

DINING-DRINKING

Appropriately enough, one of the big-
gest and most lavish Distros to open its
doors dy City, U. S. A., since the
old Chez Parec was shuttered (and taken
over for much-needed office space by the
expanding prayoy operation) is the ne
Chez Paree (100 N. Wabash Avenue). For
nostalgic nightlife bufis, the new Chez
will y recall much of

s predece
ebullience and reputati
ahy
Done in str
and gold, mirrored
main room is а supe
holding up to 400 p
the Chez "400" Lounge is furbished i
a rich red motif: the Chez Parce Ador-
ables, а corps of sparingly furbished
waitr tend tables which seat over
300. For its initial offering, the Chez had
the Lively One, Vic Damone, giving his
all and then some to make the premiere
a gala event. Choosing from a menu
limited in scope to nine of the more
popular main courses, we preceded Vic's
dinnershow stint with a sirloin that was
both succulent and heroically propor-
tioned; our companion found her filet
mignon butter soft and savory; they were
accompanied by an excellent chefs
salad and specially prepared baked
potato. After our dinner topping coffee,
we were in a properly receptive mood
for Damone (although his performance
would have brought around even the
most dyspeptic visitor), who was backed

n
iced, high-class

g blue, white
id panoplied, the
ze watering spa,
atrons. Upstairs,

impressively by Joe Parnello and his
orchestra. Henry Brandon's orchestra
plays for dancing. In the "400" Lounge
(Tommy Kelly’s in charge), there's con
tinuous entertainment. till 4 AM. The
main room has two shows nightly Sur
day through Thursday ($2.50 entertai
ment charge) and three shows Friday
and Saturday ($3.50). The Chez plans to
expand to 1100 seats this spring, at
which time Robert Goulet and Harr
Belafonte will be on the entertainment
agenda. A r figure from the old
Chez’ Fairbanks Court days, maitre de
Peter Largus is the congenial keeper of
the velvet rope.

RECORDINGS

Vinyl reminiscences are with us in
abundance. Biggest packet is the three-LP
Glenn Miller on the Air. (Victor), made up
of previously un id remotes”
from the С sland Casino, Meadow-
brook, Café Rouge, апа Paradise Res
taurant - all, some terribly
dated, some terribly dull, but m
sparked with the Miller magic. Frenk
Sinctra Sings the Select Johnny Mercer (Capi
tol) gathers together a flock of past
Sinatra performances of Mercerlyricked
melodies. The best of the lot— Laura,
When the World Was Young, Blues in
the Night, Too Marvelous for Words
and Г Thought About You—rate well
up on any alltime favorites list. Miles
Davis/Birth of the Cool (Capitol), a reissu-
ing of an LP landmark, proves that in
the eight years since its release, time has
dealt kindly with the Davis group's pio-
neer sorties into the school of the cool.
Move, Jeru, Godchild and Boplicity, ar-
d by Davis, Gerry Mulligan, John
Lewis and Gil Evans, ave still masterful
examples of the jazz art. More loosely
inclined are the groups to be found on
Wineless: Gerry Mulligan/Chet Baker (Pacific
72). The Mulligan quartet circa 1952,
with mumpeter Baker, was nonpareil;
their collaborative cflorts which make up
side one of the LP are near perfect. Side
le up of 1953-1956 Bakerled
shade less impressive, but the
nulative impact is exceptional.
Chorlie Parker/The “Bird” Returns (Savoy) is
a gleaning from mysterious sources of
well-known Parker efforts, Ko Ko, Serap-
ple from the Apple aud Barbados, among
them. Although personnel, along with
many other things, is not identified, it
seemed to these ears that Gillespie,
Norvo and Hawkins were among those
present. The recordings are technically
abominable, but we'll take what we can
get of Parker.

10 tunes i

A pair of recent arrivals in vocaldom's
more rarefied regions show their star-

studded credentials on Let There Be Love,

Let There Be Swing, let There Be Marian
Montgomery (Capitol) and Teri Thernton
Sings "Open Highwoy” (Columbia). Miss
Montgomery is of the old-fashioned gutsy
school: she grabs a ballad in both hands
and doesn't let go ший she has shaken
the last drop of excitement from it. Miss
"Thornton, a thrush of greater subtlety,
does it with superb phrasing and large
quantities of heart. Take your pick or
take both; you can't lose.

Ston Kenton/ Adventures in Blues (Capitol)
is the latest and quite possibly the best
in his tive world" series. tribute
to the genius of Gene Roland, who wrote
and orchestrated all nine numbers. it
displays the Kenton ensemble sound
a thing of beauty and allows soloists such
as trumpeter Мату Stamm and trom-
bonist Bob Fitzpatrick, and Roland's
own soprano sax, to add to the excite:
ment.

Trios/Rubinstein, Heiferz, Feuermann (Vi
brings together, for thc first timc
bum, the recordings made by that illus-
ious but short-lived chamber group
(cellist. Feuermann died in 1942. only
cight months after these recordings were
made). Performed here are the Bectho-
ven Trio in B-flat, Op. 97: the Brahms
Trio in B, Op. 8, and Schubert's Trio in
Ва, Op. 99. Although Heifetz and
Rubinstein were later to form а much-
celebrated trio with cellist Gregor Piati
gorsky, their efforts here hold high
among chamber music achievements —

was an inspired liaison.

Further evidence of the prodigious
talents of a pianist too little known in
this сопппу is provided by Martial Solal at
Newport '63 (Victor. With Bill Evans’
rhythm section providi

i support, Solal

shows himself to be an adroit technician
and an immensely imaginative impro-
viser. The session encompasses such
disparate divertisements as Django Rein-
hardt’s Clouds and the Kahn-Kaper All
God's Chillun Got Rhythm.

BOOKS

Its title from the sorrowful state-
ment of a Grand Prix dri
had just run off the road and killed a

r whose car

man, Robert Daley's The Cruel Sport (Pren-
tice-Hall, S10) is an understanding but
automo-

realistic appraisal of Grand P
ing, perhaps the most d

nen play. Based in Paris, Daley covers
European sports for The New York
Times, His book is the distillate, in
d 165 photographs. of four
years of reportage on the big European
events, and it goes a long way toward

моне

icon ini) Recording

TE DAE ANDY WILLIAMS
JAN LAKE

lstreisano Ук st JONS CE MINE

harmone EA ў
ory Doe anu
[stes РА isa,
~ еса Booklet.
et општа Soundtrack Suid pos

(CERES) ustrations|

9094. Also: A Taste 9004. "The most ad-
of Honey, My Honey's venturous musical
Loving Arms, etc. ever made.""—tife

STRAVINSKY

conducts
The “FIREBIRD”
COMPLETE BALLET

Y
ла

Apple Blossom.

White aa

“
Jerry Murad's
HARMONICATS

9060. Ramona, Ruby, 8047. " UD

Fascination, Mack formance ... lush...
The Knife, 12 in aM — rich."-Musical Amer.

DAFF. CARMINA BURANA
TH PAL скит

TIME OUT|

9025. “It soars and
‚а break:

‘Themes or Young Lovers.

PERCY FAITH

TELUNGTON
DAVIS- MONK
ow

9031. A truly defin-
itive cross-section of
The Roof, etc. the great combos

9040. "А treat, a de-
light all over again.”
Н.Х. Journal- Amer.

JOHNNY'S NEWEST HITS

3006. Also: Wasn't
the Summer Short?,
Marianna, etc.

LERNER & LOEWE

Camelot;
МАЈА
Гленн suo)
JULIE ANDREWS (el
ROBERT БИЛЕТ |]
aná rial Bose
Comma) Сай |

9003. “Most lavish,
beautiful musical; а
"triumph'"—Kilgallen

BEETHOVEN
"T Nd
Concerto

ES
MELU

afis SERM
BERNSTEIN

AX. Philharmonic

9058, Most exciting
and thrilling of ali

Beethoven concertos

$033. Also: What
Kind of Fool Am 12,
May Each Day, etc.

KOSTELANETZ
"Wonderland
of
Sound”

8015. Be My Love,
Unchained Melody,
Volare, 12 in all

Rhapsody in Blue
Aa American in Paris

Leonard
Bernstein
lays
Gershwin

9035. “Fierce impact
and | momentum."
N.Y. World-Telegram

TONY T
BENNETT |
Theft My H
Heart in
San Francisco M g
Tender Is the Night
Smie = 9 mere

9028. Also: Lo!
Sale, Candy Ki
Marry Young, etc.

REX HARRISON.
JULIE ANDREWS
My FAIR LADY

GREAT seno THEMES
EXODUS

NEVER ON SUNDAY |
THE APARTMENT

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The Versatile

HENRY.
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5008. Ebb Tide, The
Breeze end 1, Sleepy
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[Ray Comiti Singers
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[TRE REV GRE MESTRE
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Bill, Cotton Pickers!
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TCHAIKOVSKY.
Symphony No. 5
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9057. “A wholly per-
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MARY MARTIN in
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9002. A show that's
“perfectly wonder-
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demonstrating the compelling fascina-
tion that pulls men toward road-circuit
auto racing, though the game kills and
hurts so many of them. The photographs
are superlative, almost all of them revela
tory and dramatic, and many of salon

quality.

England's class barriers are down far
enough for her writers to do now what
writers did here in the Thirties. After
four books of fiction in three years, in-
cluding Saturday Night and Sunday
Morning and The Loneliness of the Long
Distance Runner, Alan Sillitoe gives us
a collection of short stories called The
Ragman's Daughter (Knopf, $3.95). In it
he re-creates with skill the sights and
smells, the voices and faces of En; |
slums. His dominant theme is still a
working-class boy with good instincts
finding that the world will not tolerate
them. The boy ends up bitterly resigned
or else sullen and restless, determined to
resist but wi ng rather than open
violence. Though the pie

Y

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in ac
gnettes, many seem pointless,
unless one is willing to settle for some
fatuous clichés glorifying the working
still. These stories hold but do not grip.
Lacking the power of imagination and
language, they too often have merely the
grayness of the life they depict.

ES cont:

Nat Hentoff began his writing cares
as a jazz critic, and, as rLavnoy readers
have ample cause to know, has devel
oped into one of our most versatile con
mentators on the current scene. H
latest book, Peace Agitator (Macmilla
$5.05), proves again that his pen probes
politics and ideology as sharply as it docs
the jazz life. The subject of Hentoll's
first biography— “Ameri Number
One Pacifist,” almostoctogenarian A. J.
Muste — ctive today climbi
barbed-w fences at missile sites
was 50 years ago leading striking textile
s in the bloody labor feuds of
5. This lively account of
explodes amy illusions
that а pacifist’s life is a peaceful onc.
The Netherlands-born peace worker has
repeatedly been beaten up and jailed for
his active. practice of nonviolent action.
A convert to Muste's br

over

nd of “nuch
pacifism” that has sparked. recent b;
the-bomb campaigns, Hentoff writes sym-
athetically of his subject but never
naively, and charts the inconsistencies
nd contradictions of Muste's deeds and
creeds as well as the man’s achievements.
Nor have Hentoll's radiant hopes for an
ated future clouded his view of

the real world; “As for myself,” writes
the author in an epilog, "I have enor-
mous doubts whether Muste and others
like him will ever reach enough people
so that the primitiveness of the way men
rule and are ruled is finally ended.”

THE PLAYBOY ADVISOR

s a virgin at marriage and my wife
not Since my discovery of her
several former relationships, I have en-
dured periodic fits of depression. 1 don't
consider my wife as chattel, and we have
a sound intellectual and physical rela-
tionship. But still, I worry. Can you
help?— J. B., Chicago, Illinois.

We can only help by reaffirming our
belief that when you scratch a jealous
lover you uncover ап angry proprietor.
You abviously do consider your wife as
chattel; if you didn’t, you'd have no
worries. The desire to possess your wife's
past (which had nothing to do with you

and is no business of yours now) is
possessiveness to the nth degree. Having
married a virgin, your wife has more
cause for worry than you do, and if she's
satisfied, you certainly should. be.

ІН... old must E be to get away with
wearing a Homburg?—J. L, Boston,
Massachusetts.

Age is not a consideration. The pre-
requisites are a long and narrow face,
and the habit of consistently conserva-
tive dress. If you meet these require-
ments you may wear a Homburg on any
reasonably formal occasion; it is espe-
cially appropriate topping for dinner
clothes and a Chesterfield.

ус talked with several different friends
about this problem and have heard
different opinions. I'm a sales trainee
and my desk is arranged so as to keep
anyone I'm talking with from getting
within four [cet of me, Often I feel that
this distance sers up a physical barrier
which is actually harmful to sales. Is
there any proper distance which should
separate two men in a business discus-
sion?— A. L., Hartford, Connecticut.

The proper distance is the one most
comforiable for you. Rearrange your
office so you can get closer to your
customers, but leave them тоот for
retreat. Most English-speaking business-
men seem to prefer conversation over
the impersonal expanse of a desk top,
while Spanish speakers will generally
climb all over such barricades to achieve
a closer discussion,

(Could you explain the custom on tip-
ping the croupiers at a roulette table?—
A. M., Cairo, Egypt.

There is no particular custom govern-
ing the tipping of croupicrs at a roulette
table. It’s entirely up to you whether oy
not you tip; how much largess you dis-
pense depends on your winnings and on
whether уоште superstitious enough to
think that the croupier brought you luck.

AA dose friend of mine is getting mar-
ried in Canada and has asked me to be
best man. This creates a problem because
Iam low on funds at present and unable
to afford the trip. The groom has offered.
to pay my fare, reasoning that he should
compensate me for my loss of working
time. But since he is just starting out,
would it be rude of me to accept his
generosity? — W. D., Sparks, Nevada.
Not at all. Your friend obviously
wants you to be his best man despite
the additional expense. Saving him
from altar-falter is far more important
than saving a few dollars, Go to the
wedding and have a good time.

МІ, firm is sending me to Paris for a
conference and at its conclusion ГЇ have
ten on my own. I'd like to sec as
much of Europe as 1 can in the shortest
possible time. Gan you give me a gencral

ties throughout
lyn, New York.

Airline service connecting European
cities is comparable (and in many in-
stances superior) to that offered here
in the States. Since every major Euro-
pean country has its own airline serving
local cities and most other countries as
well, flights are frequent. The doughty
DC3 has largely been replaced by
Swifter short-haul craft, and helicopters
are common on runs under 100 miles.
Rates are higher than in the U.S. (In-
cidentally, if you want your grand touy
to take in more than just blurred. land-
scape, we recommend that you don’t try
to sec all of Europe in ten days.)

Five been dating a coed from Atlanta
who claims I'm a damn Yankee because
1 from Baltimore. 1 that Balti-
morc is below the Mason-Dixon line,
and that 1 have every right to whistle
“Dixie” just as loudly as she does. Who's
right? — D. B., Baltimore, Maryland.

You both are. Baltimore is below the
Mason-Dixon line, but it's not in Dixie.
The Mason-Dixon line is the Pennsyl-
vania-Maryland border, first surveyed by
Gharles Mason and Jeremiah Dixon.
Baltimore is certainly below it. But the
word “Dixie” derives not from the line,
but from а bank note — the old-time
ten-dollar bill, widely distributed in
Louisiana, which prominently displayed
the French word “dix,” meaning “ten.”
The “dixie” was a common bill, and its
circulation. area, Dixieland, was immor-
lalized in song. But very [ew of the bills
ever got as far as Baltimore.

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BALLSTON KNITTING CO., INC., Ballston Spa, N. Y.

Bre heard that only plain brass buttons
may be worn with a winterweight blazer.
Is this true? — F. B., Chicago, Hlinois.

Brass or gold blazer buttons may bc
decorated with your school, club or
fraternity crest. Some blazer fans dig old
English regimental buttons, which can
be found at button shops in most cities.
It is in bad taste, however, to wear the
crest of a group to which you don't
belong, if it’s still functioning.

BA ew years back a reader asked you
what he could do to help the widow he
was dating give up the ghost of her
previous husband. You advised time and
patience. 1 wasn't the questioner, but I
ve been. The fiancé of the girl
Im now dating was killed in a racing
mishap six She still thinks
about him frequently, and when we're
e any number of little incidents
serve to remind her of “poor Carl.” Гус
established a fine physical rapport with
this girl, and have considered asking her
to marry me. But first, ГА like to chase
olf the specter of “poor Carl" and
wonder if you have any suggestions. —
D. C., Palo Alto, California,

If after six years this girl is still
hooked on a dead bean, we would advise
you to drop her gingerly and cross back
over to the land of the livin
you should first Ье sure you're
aggeraling the situation. It’s
enough for a woman to remember a
dead loved one affectionately, especially
when she's placed in circumstances
which stir the coals of memory.

might ha

However,

not ex-
natural

good restaurant, is a nod the proper
way of acknowledging acceptance of a
wine steward's offering? Also, if the wine
is poor, is it permissible to reject it? —
H. K, Flushing, New York.

Good wine deserves more than a nod;
a verbal rating of “fine” or “excellent”
will stand in much better stead than a
mere bending of the neck. Poot wine
should never be accepted.

Bh recent months Гуе been dating three
girls whose first names all begin with J.
Though in vertical moments I have по
difficulty rememberir
the intoxication of
implants a mi

the right name,
lovemaking often
ip in my sweet пой
This is far from a frivolous question,
the problem has ruined. more than one
evening for me and still persists. Can
you help?— A. R., Cleveland, Ohio.

Select an endearing cuphemism ap-
plicable to all, along the lines of
“Angel” or “Kitten” Use this constantly
for all hands and you never need fear
miss misnomers.

Recently, through a windfall, E came
ito some money and purchased a fancy
new sports car — with bucket seats. The
girls think the car is grcat, but those
damned seats are driving me crazy. Is
there any way you can score with that
console in the мау? —C.J, Pineville,
Louisiana.

We prefer to use our car for saving
time rather than making it. If, as we
imagine, you don't have your own pad.
you should have examined your automo-
tive motives more closely before you
went the sporty route. You can either
gel your own pad, or trade in the dream-
mobile for a more functional model.

[Г алцаїрайпр a career hinata
and would like to learn the origin of the

term “fourth estare.
“Tennessee.

The phrase originated in a famous
remark of Edmund. Burke in the British
Parliament. After paying his respects to
the three governing estates of the realm
(the lords spiritual, the lords temporal
and the Commons), Burke pointed to
the press gallery, adding: “Yonder, there
sal a Fourth Estate, more important far
than they all.”

— P. V., Memphis,

ES: a young, single male, gainfully
employed, with no physical deformities,
Tam what is known in social circles
а highly eligible bachelor. In this

I am invited to an endless procession of
dinner parties, cocktail parties, after-
theater parties, and purposeless p:

Imost all of which are thrown by
hostesses, gracious and otherwise. Up till
now, I've considered it sufficient ac-
knowledgment of my hostess’ labors to
thank her profusely for the grand time
and/or the wonderful dinner as 1 was
departing. Гус now been told by people
whose judgment 1 usually respect, that
I've been a boorish guest for not offering
a more formal acknowledgment of my
having been entertained — by either a
follow-up phone call, a letter or flow:
I can't believe that, in this day and
such Victorian protocol still exists. Does
ie Philadelphia, Pennsylvania.

lt does. The time and effort involved
if you phone, or write a note, is minimal,
as is the expense if you send flower
Give it a try; you'll see that it won't
hurt а bit.

I there a general aversion to green
racing cars in America? — R, B., Atlanta,
Georgi

There is a superstition among Indy
racers that the color green is unlucky.
The British don't seem to think so; green
is their racing color and has proven far
from detrimental to Lotus, B.R.M.,
Cooper, Stirling Moss, Graham Hill and
Jim Clark.

Sy you meet a good-looking girl you'd
like to ask out. You call her Monday and
ask for the following Saturday night. She
says she's sorry, she h.

e to ask immediately for the
turday?— H. R., Providence,

another date. Ts

Yes. It’s also square to confine your
dating to Saturday nights. Unless you
have a specific event in mind, a better
approach is: “I'd like to get together with
you this weekend — how about Friday or
Sunday?” This gives her a choice, and if
she's such a swinger thal all her evenings
are booked, there's nothing wrong with
matinees.

О. the mem of l Parisian
restaurant I recently spied an item called
escargots en pot de chambre. Docs this
dish mean what it appears to? (I ordered
coq au vin, so Vm still curious.) — W.
W., Cambridge, Massachusetts.

The "pot de chambre" is not liter-
ally a chamber pot, but a snail
earthenware crock in which les esca:

si

are served. Snails must be removed from
their shells for proper broiling, and some
сћеју feel it is illogical to shove them
back in afterward.

А ак my wishes and entreaties, a
girl I've been dating flew up from Texas
а few weekends ago to visit me. Her col-
lege got wind of this unauthorized trip
and expelled her, and to lessen the
impact on her parents she said the ex-
cursion was at my behest. Now her
father aming

threatening leg

for blood, even

act

n against me, The
gil has endured enough already, and
1 somehow feel it wouldn't be very noble
for me to apprise her father of the true
facts in the case. What's my move?— В.
M., је, Princeton, New Jersey.

Any girl who demeans the good name
of a friend to save her own skin deserves
what this one has received. We suggest
you sit tight and wait for the father
to act. If the storm blows over, you
can taste the pious pleasure of having
helped someone who didn’t deserve it
But if the father ever questions you di-
тесу, you must emulate Lincoln, who
said that “truth is generally the best
de against slander.”

All reasonable questions — from fash-
ion, food and drink, hi-fi and sports cars
lo dating dilemmas, taste and etiquette
— will be personally answered if the
writer includes a stamped, self-addressed
envelope. Send all letters lo The Playboy
Advisor, Playboy Building, 232 E. Ohio
Street, Chicago, Mlinois 60611. The most
provocative, perlinent queries will be
presented on these pages each month.

er hand-sew

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21

PLAYBOY

22

JACKIE GLEASON pm

JACKIE GLEASON

5-05. JACKIE GLEASON. MUSIC,
MARTINIS AND MEMORIES
12 love themes. I Remember
You, Once In A While, ес.

THE BIST OF JUNE CHRISTY.

Ра

concerto

for my
lore
jeorge

Ж 7]

1574, NAT KING COLE

1935. GEORGE SHEARING.

CONCERTO тоа м

ТЕЗВЛНЕ KINGSTON TAIO.
Y COLLEGE CONCERT Ese ar

Mory. Chilly

Winds, oiher

ran [ege

А EE Ferr fo love,

ЕНА

Му Lov, 10 mor:

NAT KING COLE

17-33. NAT KING COLE. RAM-
BLIN” ROSE. Worm country mu-
sic: The Good Times, Skip to

Pick a 5 platter package of playmusic for playboys and their

THE LETTERMEN

a,

Ба um
tazy. uively LOVE

TES. TH пин OSH:
THE SWINGERS.

BY HACKETT.

VR а OF TEE
hera WIE NU

KT. Di

YESA, FARON YOUNG. THE
YOUNG. APPROACH, На
[n

p of

PEGGY LEE BLUES
Созу COUNTRY. Borin

тата GEORGE SHEARING.
THE SHEARING TOUCH

PEGGY LEE

TES STAN KENTON. TH)

ROMANTIC "APPROACH.

15-20. PEGGY LEE. BASIN STREET
EAST. Catch her dub perform-
ance of Fever, The Second Time
Around, Yes, Indeed, 12 mor

THE (ETTERNER
FON A TIME, 12

3
91001. Condes

YE A7 THE KINGSTON TRIG.
Пе UP 12 songs never
Before recorded: Soil
у. D Kon Korongo
D Weenies

MILES DAVIS

19-74. MILES DAVIS. BIRTH OF
THE COOL. Also Koi Winding,
1. 3. Johnson, others on ЇЇ

соо!” tunes, Monaural only.

nn

a

FORD: WEARER THE CROSS

туз RANK тни
AN OUD LOVE AFFAIR.

Sota

Es

Jy ОМ Пете. VIE be
Г Mund, Vie
E му touti &

"зэ. TONEN JONES GUAN
TET JUMPIN” WITH
JONAH Мо oa ni АК
Jo а Cigale Thor
Рому, BI Belly
Сън

THE BEST OF
DUKE ELLIN

веру

ТЕТ
NEW WAVE, A a
Cheroker, С

1758. VIVA BOSSA NOVA!

(record sat count

теат THE BEST OF DUKE

1648. THE LETTERMER А
SONG FOR YOUNG LOVE.

[OE

nemis uec SINATRA

THE GREAT YEARS.
Huge, 36 hit collection of "The King's”
Пале

IG recorde now im on.
«souvenir cibum. Thrill

АП of ме.

Witcherofl, Leomin' the
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"e

AS from 2 pages of long-play, peak-performance platters!

Кеса Review. 28
icq eras from the

YII нангу WILSON.
ia di more eue, HEIC YOUNG LOVERS
ed v

(Record set cunts as
ый ршн мешз

1 know my love.

Бо»

TUAE

чип i5
mutual!

ia Н

МЕ SHEARING/WILSON
NOS GAME! A
GESSAEN TET ix CY WILSON: THE SWINGIN'S
10 mere swingers, т

when you become a trial member of the Capitol Record Club and agree
to buy only six future selections. from the several hundred available
Capitol and Angel Albums to be offered you, during the next 12 months.

16:09. STAN KENTON.
VEST ubt STONY ace
jon ot lege ond,

К B

шт
[ud

GARDNER

ИШТ
MAKE NO

THE BEST OF
THE KINGSTON TRIO

DIFFERENCE

DONT MATE NO DIF:

TET. DAVE GARDNER. П

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CAPITOL

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ansyivania

1732. ВАГ ANINE ILSS. ROSE WADDOX 18-31. ANNIE
ALMOST LOST MY MIND. SINGS BLUEGRASS. Fres KINDA GROOVY"
ro Me ed of Halted ele viet” drenched piers

НАМЕ. аад ore

ISSUER USO 17.05. THE BEST OF THE KING-
STON TRIO. Tom Dooley, Ti-

ivona Jail, Everglades, 9 other

FORD FAVORITES |

EN

tram be cross

"EE
та

As |

ти
[а]
ти

11. TENNESSEE ERNIE
То. OD rA OPES.

m
ир mim

Vi Toka Mormon more

WANDA
JACKSON

17-96. STAN KENTON-
NIURIS IN JAZZ

‘U4 THE LEE EVANS TAIO,
iene Мар el

Б
Gia бше
Shes mos ma

mad mad mian
GATEWAY TRIO

[EA

тоз. CARMEN, DRAGON
AN EVENING WIH COLE 09

FORTER. Helly wood Bowl
rl

Ea ШЫ што
нз! Hoy. tet

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PLAYBOY

26

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Mail this reservation form now to:

PLAYBOY TOURS, 232 East Ohio Street, Chicago, Illinois 60611

O I am enclosing my deposit check for $25 per person to hold my rescrvation(s) and
look forward to receiving all the exciting details. 1 understand balance is due 30 days

prior to departure.

Г] Charge balance of tour price (5154) to my PLAYBOY CLU! S KEY number
Note: Full refund will be made 30 days prior to departu
nal $10 Late Cancellation Service Charge will be made e

nom

(mr) (тш)

please print

THIS MARCH

SKI WITH PLAYBOY TOURS
9 breath-taking days at CRESTED BUTTE, Colorado
at a vest-pocket price, only $179* March 27 to April 5

* wine and fondue Awards Party

= skispree windup party and dance

+ special skier's pack of Sea & Ski sun-tan
lotion selected for use by Winter Olym-
pic Team

© ...1Us all included ii

price... plus 1015 тоге...
be overwhelmed

the package
read on and

*complete price from Denver

TRAVEL BY AIR TO DENVER . . . fly

ntinental Airlines Golden Jets
take advantage of special freight
es for ski equipment.
Continental's coach minimum round-
trip jet fares:
Chi. to Den. $92.40 5 flights daily
K.C. to Den. $69.30 3 flights daily
L.A. to Den. $96.00 4 flights daily
Playboy Tours will gladly arrange
transportation from your home town
to Denver if you wish

Reservations for this grand spree will be
snapped up quicker than the morning
oatmeal at a skiers hostel.

If you plan to swing along make your
reservations now.

any time thereafter, a
cach reservation.

address

E are

Tip code по.

CEST SKI BON WITH PLAYBOY

NOW, for Buffs or Bunnies...a ski-
spree to remember always... brilliant
sun-filled days skiing the fresh powder
... enchanting tyrol night life in quaint
bistros and restaurants . . . intimate après-
ski parties... all enjoyed with friendly
ski-free companions.

CRESTED BUTTE ...the fabulous
new Colorado ski area... in the majestic
Rockies. .. offers the finest in American
skiing. PLAYBOY selected it for the
site of its first ski-spree—not only be-
cause of the excellent skiing... but
because the facilities measure up to
PLAYBOY standards...and the warm
intimate atmosphere that abounds.

Comfort and convenience are the key-
notes of this PLAYBOY sprec. Your
every need has been anticipated.

The trails supply challenge to the ex-
pert, recreation for the aficionado and
ample room for beginners. .. moun
side sun decks are ideal for basking in
the warm Colorado sunshine or sharing
a rucksack lunch.

Crested Butte night life offers... every-
thing from folk-music palaces to quiet
bistros. The restaurants in which you'll
dine feature gourmet menus.

SKI CREST LODGE...relax in the
chalet atmosphere of this new Scandi-
navianinspired lodge. To achieve the
greatest degree of exclusivity, the com-
ties of Ski Crest Lodge have
over to Playboy Tours .. .
you the finest in service and
attention with a special "house party"
flair, All accommodations are twin-bed,
private-bath. Unwind aprésski in the
heated pool. The lifts are adjacent to the
lodge.

So, playboys and ‘mates . . . point your
ski tips toward Crested Butte... then
get in the fall line for the fastest schuss
ever. Let Playboy Tours handle the
details and worries.

But hurry... only a limited number of
reservations can be accepted, Reserva-
tions are on a “first-in” basis.

Send Coupon Now...full details will
be mailed immediately.

ALL-INCLUSIVE

PLAYBOY SKI-SPREE PRICES

Just $179 (includes everything listed
below F.O.B. Denver): twin bedrooms
and private baths, breakfasts and sup-
pers, champagne bus party, all special
parties and entertainment, all lift tickets,
pool privileges, ice skating, sleigh rides
and dog-sled rides, bus fare Denver to
Crested Butte and return, skiing exhibi-
tion, free Sea & Ski skier's pack, normal
service charges and taxes. Not included:
ski lessons or equipment rental, lunches,
any items ordered from à la carte menus,
alcoholic beverages (except at specially
planned events where specified) and tips
for extra service.

PLAYBOY'S INTERNATIONAL DATEBOOK

BY PATRICK CHASE

: OF THE leastknown international
playgrounds is at the very roof of the
world: the Himalayas, though they are
inaccessible from mid-November to the
end of March. The scason opens April
Ist, when the winter snows are melting;
and to the intrepid they offer 28,000-foot
mountains, big-game hunting, trout fish-
ing, archaeological sites, primitive tribes
men, health-giving waters, unusual wines
and rugged scencry until the onset of the
cold weather.

This area, bordered by Pakistan and
India, among others, is serviced by
Pakistan International Airlines with
regular flights. Hundreds of square miles
of soaring, snow-dad mountaintops sur-
round the few oases of civilization, One
of these, the Hunza district, whose peo-
ple are descendants of the Greck follow-
ers of Alexander, is a must on your
itinerary. The mir of Hunza entertains
visiting Americans royally — in the literal
sense — with a stay in resthouscs adjoin-
ing the mir palace, attendance by the
's servants, and all meals with the
mir and his queen, the rani. The big-
game hunter will find here the Marco
Polo, a rare species of mountain sheep
three times the size of the normal speci-
men, plus the markhor and ibex, sure-
footed goats often encountered at heights
up to 13,000 fect. Travelers overimbibing
the heady local wines can recover nicely
with Hunza's gold-and-mica-impregnated
mineral waters.

If the seaside is your desire in April,
yowll find that the Caribbean is at its
balmiest and least crowded then. From
Sapphire Bay on St Thomas in the
Virgins, you can hop the big launch
leaving behind the booming rhythm of
steel-drum bands and the clangor of
carnivaltime — to the green-forested
mountains of St. John, a sun-warmed is-
land of limpid coves and junglelined
beaches, where the water is so dear you
can barely sce it at beaches” edge. Swim
out a few feet into the bath-warm bay of
indigo and emerald, and you're looking
down five fathoms to softly tailing
anemones, in canyons and outcroppings
of bright coral dappled with the spark-
ling flash of gliding sca life; or dive into
а burst of color, through bright-gold
specks that are schools of ycllowtails,
through pinks and blues and deep reds
of innumerable tropical fish, all darting
and drifting through раје seagreen
shafts of sunshine slanting down to the
occan's sandy floor.

If you're still seeking winter skiing,
the season is just beginning in April
down under, where the sport—in the

n

high snow fidlds of New South Wales
and Victoria in Australia, plus the moun-
tainous islands of New Zealand — is se
ond only to cricket in popularity. Easily
reached from the warm beaches of Syd
ney are Thredbo and Smiggin Holes on
the slopes of Mount Kosciusko, or from
Melbourne you can drive easily to
Mounts Buller or Hotham. Accommoda-
tions are scarce, however, at all these
spots, save the chalets of Thredbo, and
should be booked well in advance. The
same is true for New Zealand resorts,
with the notable exception of Queens
town, where, from the Hermitage Hotel
in the Southern Alps. ski planes fly you
to the head of the gigantic Tasman Gla-
cier to start one of the longest, most
scenic downhill runs in the world—a
glistening, challenging 16 miles.

You'll find plenty of snow in Colorado
during April, too, and a wide choice of
good lodges close to Denver on the slopes
of the Arapahoe Ski Basin. There's a
young, br
Aspen, Steamboat Springs, Vail Village,
Winter Park, Squaw Pass and 18 other
major ski areas. Whether you're a novice
or a pro, you'll find conditions and
slopes to suit every taste. North across the
border into Canada are the mile-wide
slopes and hot-spring pools at Banff and
Jasper in the Rockies, with two-mile
downhill runs, chair lifts that rise 7000
feet in ten minutes and floodlights for
the nocturnal hill gliders. Lavish summer
resort hotels arc still closed in April, but
simpler accommodations arc available at
$4 to 512 a day. Another good spot
that’s still going in April—in fact, at
any time of year, since it boasts Sno«
that haul enthusiasts dear up to the ski-
able snows at the peak — is Timberline
Lodge in Oregon, with a year-round
swimming pool to boot.

"hose of you whose motto is "If
springtime comes, leave winter far be-
d," will find April a specially fine
time to cruise the Aegean. For as little as
520 a day, you can rent a Greckrigged
ique with auxiliary engine, taking your
pick of sweeping bays and sunlit cov
as you scud among the islands. If you
prefer more deluxe modes of sailing,
schooners may be chartered, or — for
$100 to 5400 per day, depending upon
size — you can rent a yacht, with crew
and if you should sce a Mercourilike
creature singing a siren song on a fishing
wharf, there is no obligation to Tash
yourself to the mast and sail on.

For further information on any of the
above, write to Playboy Reader Serv
ice, 232 E. Ohio SL, Chicago, Il1.60611. ED

ght crowd at such resorts as

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SUPERSCOPE 5

4« THE PLAYBOY PANEL:
JAZZ- TODAY AND TOMORROW

one of a series of provocative conversations about subjects of interest on the contemporary scene

PANELISTS
JULIAN "CANNONBALL" ADDERLEY is an ur
bane alto saxophonist and leader who
has achieved sizable popular success dur-
ing the past five years. He is also
cord ctor and has helped many
musicians get their first chance at na-
ional exposure. Adderley has termed his
"modern traditiona indicating
his knowledge and respect for the jazz
past as well as his interest in continuing
to add to the music. Through his lucid,
erts, festivals
and night clubs, Adderley has become a
model of how to make an audience [eel
closer to the jazz experience.
DAVE BRUBECK, the rugged, candid pianist,
leader and composer, has won an unusu-
ally large audience to the extent of even
having had a number of hit single rec-
ords. Instead of coasting in a familiar
groove, however, he has continued to
experiment; in recent years he has turned
to time signatures comparatively new to
Although Brubeck is characterist
en friendly and guileless, he is a fierce
defender of his musical position and does
not suffer critics casually.
JOHN "DIZZY" GILLESPIE is now recognized
throughout the world as the most prodi-
gious trumpet player in modern
He is also the leading humorist in jazz
and he has demonstrated that a jazz mu-
can be a brilliant entertainer
without sacrificing any of his musical in-
tegrity. He is now leading one of the
most stimulating groups of his career,
and is also engaged in several ambitious
recording projects.
RALPH J. GLEASON, onc of the [cw jazz crit-
ics widely respected by musicians, is a
ted columnist who is based at the
San Francisco Chronicle (in our October
issue, we erroncously placed him on the
Examiner staff). He has edited the book
Jam Session; has contributed to a wide
n America and
of Jazz Casual,
an unprecedentedly superior series of
jazz television shows, distributed by the
Educational Television. Net-
critic, Gleason is clear, some-
times blunt, and passionately involved
with the musi
STAN KENTON is a leader of extraordinary
i nd determination. He has cre-
nctive orchestral style and, in
. has given many composers
rangers an opportunity to experi-
ment with ideas and devices which very

g d

few other band leaders would have per-
mitted. The list of Kenton alumni is
long and distinguished. In a period dur-
ng which the band business has been
erratic at best, Kenton is proving again
that a forceful personality and unmistak-
ably individual sound and style can draw.
enthusiastic audiences.

CHARLES MINGUS, а virtuoso bassist, is one
of the most ori and emotionally
compelling composers in jazz history.
groups create a surging ex
producing some of the most starding
experiences jazz has to offer. He is also
an author, and has completed a long,
explosive autobiography, Beneath the
Underdog. An uncommonly open man,
Mingus invariably says what he feels and
continuously looks for, but seldom finds,
equal honesty in the society around him.
GERRY MULLIGAN has proved to be one of
the most durable figures in modern jazz,
In addition to his supple playing of the
baritone saxophone, he has led a series
of intriguingly inventive quartets and
sextets as well as a large orchestra which
is one of the most refreshing and re-
sourceful units in contemporary jazz.
Mulligai also has acted in films and is
now writing a Broadway musical. He has
a quality of natural leadership which is
manifested not only in the way all of his
groups clearly reflect his musical persor
y, but also in the fact that whenever
jam sessions begin at jazz festivals, Mul-
ligan is usually in charg
GEORGE RUSSELL has cmerged during the
past decade as a jazz composer of excep-
tional imagination and originality. He
has recorded a series of albums with his.
own group, and these represent one of
the most impressive bodies of work in
modern jazz. He is also a teacher, and
among his students in New York are a
number of renowned jazzmen, А pipe-
smoking, soft-voiced inhabitant of Gre:
wich Village, Russell is not one of the
more prosperous jazzmen, despite his
stature among musicians, but he refuses
to compromise his music in any way.
GUNTHER SCHULLER is a major force in
contemporary music — both classical and
jazz. He is one of the most frequently
performed American composers, has bee!
awarded many commissions here and
abroad (his most recent honor, a Gu;
genheim fellowship), and is also an ac-
complished conductor. For ten years,
Schuller was first French horn with the
Metropolitan Opera Orchestra, but now

KENTON: So much of today's jazz is full
of negative emotions and ugly feelings.
People just don’t want to subject them-
selves to these terrible experiences.

Too many of the new players
are interested in just being different. 1
don't think it's necessary to be different
so much as to be right —to be felt.

GLEASON: Crow Jim describes the feeling
of some fans who will pay attention
only to Negro jazz musicians and won't
listen to white musicians.

гск: Early in my career, I realized
Fermi card my audience with one
thing only, and that was “music.” This is
something most groups have forgotten.

29

PLAYBOY

30

GILLESPIE: Improvisation is the meat of
jazz. Rhythm is the bone. The jazz
composer’s ideas have always come [rom
the instrumentalist.

\

RUSSELL: The last refuge of the untal-
ented is the avant-garde. But as the
standards of new jazz become
clearer these people will be weeded out.

the

scHULLER: One thing concerns me about
our sending jazz overseas. The countries
where most musicians have been sent have
been hipper than our State Department.

MINGUS: Aren't you white people asking
100 much when you ask me to stop say-
ing this is my music? Especially when
you don't give me anything else.

MULLIGAN: I don't give а damn if a
man is green or blue. If he can blow,
let him blow. If he can't blow, let him
do something else.

devotes his full time to composing, con-
ducting and writing about music. He has
had extensive experience in jazz and is
largely responsible for the concept of
third-stream mu He is currently
working on an analytical musical history
of jazz for Oxford University Press. A
man of вести imitless energy, Schul-
ler is expert in many arcas of music as
well as in literature and several of the
other arts.

PLAYBOY: There appears to be a paradox
in the current jazz situation. The inter
national stature of the music has never
been higher, and jazz ng more

recei

coming ha
declining economically, and if it is. how
do you reconcile that decline with all
the publicity i

much of a
connection between how much is written
з newspapers and ma
and the growth of its
if this were important,
would ha
pop music. Yet you can't comp
ord sales of even the most popu
al artists, such as Leonard Berustein w
those of John
this over to y
being written today about jazz mu
but I don't think it will affect the popul
ity of the jazz musician much, or his rec-
ord sales, or tlie amount of work he gets.
As for work being harder and harder
to find, I think this is true. Not true for
the accepted jazz musicians, the ones who
have been around for a while. I'd say
the pianists I feel are my contemporaries
— Erroll Garner, George Shearing, Oscar
Peterson — are certainly working as much
as they want to work. I am, too. You
couldn't say we're complaining. But a
young pianist coming up today might
have a harder time than we did,
GLEASON: While it is true that several
night clubs have gone out of business —
night clubs that have been associated.
with jazz over the years — I don't think
jazz is in any economic decline. The
ales of jazz records and the presence of
azz singles on the hit parade ind
isn

te it
- The boxoffice grosses of the New
al and the Monterey
ndicate it isn't. The pr
y of groups like those led
by Miles Davis. Count Basie, John Col-
папе — апа from this panel, Brubeck,
Dizzy and Cannonball Adderley — show
that there is a very substantial market
for jazz in this country

But there is not a market for second-
rate jazz, and at certain times in the
past, we have had an economy that has
supported second-rate jazz as well as first-
c jazz. I think that those fringe groups
are now finding work difficult to get. On
the other hand, all the jazz night clubs
complain consistently that its hard to

port Jazz Festi
Festival

receiv
ing a great deal of publicity these days, in
PLAYBOY às well as elsewhere, but I don't
think this fact is related to anything at
all except the growing awareness on the
part of the American public that jazz is
something worthy of its interest.
MULLIGAN: I think this all has to be seen
i pective. During the big upsurge of
the ly 1950s. we saw a tre-
mendous increase in the number of clubs.
Now we start wailing the blues and we
say, look how terrible times are when
these clubs start to close. But we forget
that what h ppened is that the busi
L rd
gine that there are probably more
jazz clubs today than there were in the
19305. I think vou'd find that there were
many fewer units i
prol king the
money that even some relatively un-
known groups are making today.
RUSSELL: 1 can't agree with the optimism.
that has been expressed so far. I think
economic conditions bad for all but
the established groups. and the reason
goes to the basic structure of American
life. During the swing ста, anti-Negio
prejudice was at a vicious level. So the
young Negro rebels, intellectuals and
gang members alike, shared a reverence
for jazz because it expressed the fe
of revolt that they needed. It se
that they had to feel that at least som
thing in their culture was a dynamic,
growing thing. The creative jazz musician
was one of the most respected members
of the Negro community. Then bop
came along and was generally accepted
lly unbiased dissidents and
ted by those committed to status
goals in either case, irrespective of race.

Another conflict was added to jazz
which also tr: ended race — between
the innovator who creates the art (scck-
ing what he can give to it), and the
imitator who dilutes and who is mostly
interested in what art can give to him.

There is, to be sure, a revolution going
on in America. People want an equal
chance to compete for status goals that
compromise rather than enhance a mean-
ingful life, What I would like to see
is a renaissance. Shouldn't a social rev-
olution be armed with a violent drive
not only to clevate the individual, but
to elevate and enrich the culture as well?
If we continue to cater to the tyranny of
the majority, we shall all be clapping
our hands to Dixie on one and thre
MINGUS: You have to go further than
that. No matter how many places jazz is
written up, the fact is that the musicians
themselves don't have any power. Tastes
are created by the business interests.
How else x

ness has settled
im

ack to nor

by the culturz

теј

сап you

SCHULLER: I'll go along with George and
Charles that there arc serious economic

problems in jazz today, but the basic
nswer is very simple. It's not a comfort-
ng answer economically, but I believe

that jazz in its most advanced stages has
now. recisely at the point where
classic opean music arrived between

1915 and 1920. At that time, classical
music moved into an area of what we
can roughly call total freedom, which is
marked by such things as atonality, or
free rhythm, or new forms, new kinds of
conti all these things. So the audi-
ence was suddenly left without а tradi-
tion, without specific style, without, in
other words, the specifics of a language
which they thought they knew very well.
By also moving into this arca — and. 1
believe the move was inevitable — jazz

has removed itself from its audience.
ADDERLEY: I
There is an a

don't know about that.
idience out there now, a
ble audience. But you have to p
for it. When we go to work, we play for
that audience because the audience is
the reason we're able to be there. Of
course, we play what we want to and in
the way we want to, but the music is
directed at the audience. We don't play
and ignore the people. I
s the proper approach,
and I've discovered that most of the guys
who are making a buck play for audi-
ences. One way or another.

PLAYBOY: Can you be more specifi

ADDERLEY: Well, I think the audience
fecls quite detached from most jazz
groups. And it works the other way

around, too. Jazz musicians have a tend-
ency to keep themselves detached. from
the audience. But J speak to the aud
ence. I don't sce that it’s harmful to
advise an audience that you're going to
play such and such a thing and tell them
something about it. Nor is it harmful to
tell something about the man you're
going to feature and something about
why his sound is different. Or, if some-
body requests a song we've recorded with
some measure of success, we'll program
GILLESPIE: Yes, I think some jazz artists
e forgetting that jazz is entertainment,
too. If you don't take your audience into
consideration and put on some kind of
a show, they'd just as soon sit at home
and listen to your records instead of
coming to see you in person.

PLAYBOY: A number of musicians — Er-
roll Garner, the Modern Jazz Quartet
nd Dave Brubeck here, among them —
have either stopped playing night clubs
entirely or are curtailing their nightclub
engagements drastically. Do you think
the future of jazz lies largely in the
concert field rather than in night clubs?
And, trends aside, do you prefer to play
the clubs or at a concert?

KENTON: For big bands, there does se
to be a trend away from the clubs, b

m

cause so many of the clubs have had such
problems trying to keep alive. We might.
finally be left with only concert halls —
where you can book spotty dates. But
personally, I really don't see a lot of
difference between clubs and concerts so
long as you can play jazz for listening.
I don't think most of us mind whether
people are drinking while they listen or
whether they're. just sitting in a concert.
hall. ГӘ just as soon play in either con-
text.

GLEASON: I don't think the future of ja
lies largely in the concert field, 1 think
that it lies partially in the concert field
id partially in the night clubs. The fact.
that Brubeck and Erroll Garner and the
Modern Jazz Quartet have all reached a
level of economic independence where
they can function outside the night dub
most of the time is an indication of their
success, not necessarily an indication of
the future of jazz.

All the jazz groups Гус ever heard
have something dillerent to offer when
they're in night clubs than they do when
they're on the concert sta I recently
rd the Brubeck quartet, for instance,
play the first nightclub engagement on
the West Coast that it's played in prob-
me to that
engagement after having
heard them in two concert appearances,
and the thing that happened in the
night club was much more interesting
and much more exciting than it was
ihe concert hall. And all four musici

z

commented on how great they felt and

how well the group played in the night-
club appearance.

MINGUS: I wish I'd never have to play in
night clubs again. I don't mind the
drinking, but the nightclub environ
ment is such that it doesn't call for a
musician to even care whether he's com-
municating. Most customers, by the time
the musicians reach the second set, are
10 some extent inebriated. "They dont
what you play anyway. So the c
ment in a night club is not con
ive to good creation. It's conducive
reation, to the playing of what
they're used to. In a club, you could
never elevate to free form as well as the
way you could, say, in a concert hall
BRUBECK: I can understand that feel
The reason we got away from n
clubs has nothing to do with the people
who go to night clubs, or night clubs
themselves, or night-club operators. It
has to do with the way people behave
in night clubs. The same person who
will be very attentive at a concert will
often not be so attentive in a night club.
But I must also say that there are some
types of jazz I've played in groups which
would not come across well
ge atmosphere. And to tell you
the truth, I'm usually happiest playing
juz in a dance hall because there I

don't feel I'm imposing my music and

a con-

myself on my audience. They can stand
up close to the bandstand and listen to
us, or they can dance, or they can be
way in the back of the hall holding a
conversation.

GILLESPIE, Maybe so, but for myself, the
atmosphere in a night club lends itself
to more creativity on the part of the
audience as well as the musician. One
reason is that the musician has closer
contact with the people and, therefor
can build better rapport. On the other
hand, I also like the idea of concerts,
because, for one thing: the kids who
aren't allowed into night clubs can hear
you at concerts and can then buy your
records. But to n to the advantages
of clubs, when you're on the road a lot,
the club—at least one where you can
stay a сот ly long period of time,
— docs give you a kind of simulated
home atmosphere. There's a place for
both clubs and concerts.

ADDERLEY: Yes. I like to play them both,
too. And I like festivals. I like television
shows — any kind of way we get a chance
to play consistently. I like to do. But
unlike Charles, a joint has my favorite
mosphere. 105 true that some people

can get noisy, but thats part of it. It
little

seems to me that I feel a
better when people seem to be hi
good time before you even begin.
it gives me something to play on. In
à concert, sometimes, we don't
enough time to warm up and if the first
number is a little bit below our stand-
ards, we never quite recover. At least
in a club you have sets, and if one set
doesn’t go well, you have a chance to
w what you've done and approach
another way the second time around.
My own preferences aside, howevei
T think that the night-dub business in
general is on an unfortunate decline. In
a short while, the night club will be a
relic, because night clubs are too expen-
sive for most people to really support
in the way they should be supported.
Just recently, T was talking to a guy
who has a cub in Columbus, Ohio.
Scveral years ago, he played Art Blake
and the Jazz Messengers, Horace Silv
Miles L Kai Winding, the Oscar
Peterson "Trio, and my band. He said he
didn't pay over $2200 а weck for any-
body. But now groups that used to cost
him $1250 cost $2500, d the same way
up the line. But he has no more se
than he had before, and the people are
unwilling to pay double for drinks even
though the bands cost the owner double.
Yet, at the same time, the musi
cost of living has also gone up. It's a
rough circle to break
PLAYBOY: Arc you saying then, that the
future of jazz gely in
the concert
ADDERLEY: Not riicularly. I think
there'll be other things. There'll be
theaters. I think festivals are going to

31

PLAYBOY

32

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33

PLAYBOY

34

come back in a different way. "The
George Wein type of festival of today
stands a good chance. In the purest
sense, his are not jazz festivals the way
Newport was in the beginning. But if.
Wein presents somebody like Gloria
Lynne at a festival today, whether or not.
she is a jazz singer isn't the point. The
fact is she is going to draw a certain
number of people. So Wein, thereby,
can also present Roland Kirk and he
can call it a jazz festival. Most people
are not going to quibble over whether
Gloria Lynne is a jazz singer; they'll
come to hear her at a jazz festival.
MULLIGAN: Well, I want to try whatever
outlets for playing we have. I don't want
to do the same thing all the time. As
for clubs, at any given time, there a
maybe only three to five clubs i
country that 1 really enjoy playing. And
when you figure two to three weeks in
each of five clubs, about 15 wecks of
the year are already taken care of. For-
tunately, in New York, there is more
than one club in which we can work,
so that we сап stay there longer. We
need that time, because otherwise we'd
never get any new material

There are advantages and disadvan-
tages on both sides. I find clubs very
wearying in а way in which concerts
aren't, The hours themselves — working
from nine to two or nine to four, what-
ever it is. It plays hell with your days.
I know guys who are able to get work
done in the daytime when they're play-
ing clubs. Maybe they're better disc
plined than I am, but I find I'm dr:
by clubs. So that's what concerts
mean to me —a chance to work during
the day. But I also need clubs because
we need that kind of atmosphere for
the band — an atmosphere in which you
just play and play and play, The hard
of it—playing hour after hour,
after night, in the same circum.
stances — is good for a band. Concerts,
however, are also good for the big band,
because they allow me to do a greater
variety of things. And economically,
there are very few clubs into which I
ake the big band — because of trans-
portation costs and the problems of
g out some kind of consecutive
tour. So, I haye to think in terms of both
concerts and clubs. So far as I'm con-
cerned, I don't see my future as exclu-
sively in one or the other direction.
MINGUS: I'll tell you where I'd like more
of my future work to be. I'd like some
Governmental agency to let me my
band out in the streets during the sum-
mer so that I could play in the parks or
on the backs of trucks for kids, old peo-
ple, anyone. In delinquent hbor-
hoods in the North. All through the
South. Anywhe I'd like to sce the
Government pay me and other bands
who'd like to play for the people. I'm
not concerned with the promoters who

want to make money for themselves out
of jazz. Td much rather play for kids.
PLAYBOY: Perhaps more
the question of where jazz is going to be

We secm to be in a period
carly 1940s—when Dizzy
c

Gillespie,
lie Parker, Thelonious Monk and
others began to change the jazz lan-

guage. In other wor
of young musici
gre:
cally and rhythmically. Do you think
that it is indeed time for another expan-
sion of the jazz language? Has the music
of the established players become too
predictable, too "safe"

Is, a new gene
ns is insisting

on
ater freedom — melodically, harmoni-

SCHULLER: 105 not cntirely accurate to
relate what's happet

g now to what
took place in the 1940s. The languag
of “bop” at that time remained largely
tonal, and even a comparative novice
could connect it with what had gone
before in jazz. This is no longer true,
The music of the vantgarde has
gone across that borderline which is the
same borderline which the music of
Schoenberg passed in 1908 and 1909. At
that time, it was the most radical step
in some 700 years of classi music. In
jazz. nothing so radical as what has been
going on during the past five years took
place in the previous 40 or 50 years of
jazz history. Everything previously, even
the bop “revolution,” was more of a
step-by-step evolution. Whats happen-
ing now is a giant мер, a radical step.
Because of the radical nature of the ad-
vance, there is a much greater gap
between. player and audience now than
there was in the 19405.

KENTON: I agree about the gap, but I also
feel that a lot of the modern exper
menters are taking jazz too fast. Some-
times they're doing things just to gain
being different for the sake
1g different. ‘They're also running
the risk of losing their audience entirel
After all, if a music doesn’t commur

sophisticated a listener may be, eventu-
ally he'll lose interest and walk off if
there's no communication. The listener
id himself for while if hc
thinks there's something new and dif-
ferent in the music, but if there's no
validity to the music, Um afraid the
jazz artist might lose the listener entirel
GLEASON: First of all, Y don't think that
the jazz of the established players
become 100 predictable or too safe.
What's predictable or safe about the
way Miles Davis or Dizzy Gillespie play,

ans are by t
new generation
try to do something new. And in trying
to do something new, they may do a lot
ol foolish things and a lot of dull things.
They may do a lot of things that will
have no interest for other musicians,

now or in the future. But this won't
stop them from experimenting.
BRUBECK: We arc certainly in a period
during which musicians are starting to
branch out into very individualistic
directions, and that's very healthy. It's
also healthy because we're not codified.
It doesn't all have to be bop or swing or
New Orleans or Chicago style. We can
all be working at the same time in our
own individual ways. We are now in
the healthiest period in the history of
As for the new gencration of young
musicians insisting on greater freedom —
melodically, harmonically and rhythmi-
Пу — they certainly should. This is
their role—to expand, to create new
things. But it’s also their role to build
on the old, on the past: and when you
have all these new, wild things going
on, there are some of the wild expe
menters who aren't qualified yet, They
haven't the roots to shoot out the new
aches. They will die.
GILLESPIE: That's right. You have to know
whats gone before. And another thing,
I don't agree that the established players
have become too It takes you
20 to 25 years to find out what not to
play, to find out wl ad taste.
Taste is something — like wine — that.
requires aging. But Vd also agree that
jazz, like any art form, is constantly
evolving. It has to if it's a dynamic art.
And unfortunately, many artists do not
cvolve and thus remain static. As [or me,
Vm stimulated by experimentation and
unpredictability. Jazz shouldn't be boxed
in. If it were, it would become decadent.
MINGUS: Any musician who comes up and
tries changing the whole pattern is
ing too much his hands if he thinks
he can cut Charlie Parker, Louis Arm-
strong, King Oliver and Dizy all in
one "i You sce, there's a
danger of those experimenters getting
boxed in themselves in their own de-
vices. As for now. I don't hear any great
пре in jazz Twenty years ago, I was
playing simple music that was involved
with a lot of things these musicians are
doing now. And Im still playing the
same simple music. I haven't even begun
to play what I call way-out music. 1
have some music that will make these
cats sound like babies, but this is not
the time to play that kind of music.
ADDERLEY: I'd agree with what the ques-
tion implies— we've had a certain
amount of lethargy in recent ycars.
Everybody knew how to do the same
thing. So, I'd like to say thank God
for Ornette Coleman and such players
because, whether or not you're an
Ornette Colem fan, his stimulus has
done much for all of us. I know it caused
me to develop. It caused Coltrane to
develop even further, because he felt
he had exhausted chord patterns and
so forth. Howcver, there has also been
a focusing on another arca — one. Dizzy

mentioned. I heard a new record by
Ilinois Jacquet the other day and it
made me realize again that as certain
guys get older, they develop a tendency
to get more out of less. Illinois gets more
out of his sound, morc out of a little
vibrato in the right place than he used
to. "Therefore, don't discount the ma-
turity that has come with experience
and discipline. As 1 say, many of us
have been stimulated by what's going
on, but we're also aware that often emo-
tion is missing in all this emphasis on
freedom. Too many of the newer players
are interested in just being different. I
don't think it's necessary to be different.
so much as to be right. To bc felt. To
be beautiful.
MULLIGAN: Yes, the concept of freedom.
has been overworked a great deal. In
the course of "frecing" themselves, as
Mingus said, a lot of the guys have be-
come even more rigidly entrenched in
a stylized approach.
PLAYBOY: In regard to the casting off of
old jazz forms, what is your reaction to
the concept of “third stream” music—
a music which will draw from both jazz
and classical heritages but which is in-
tended to have an identity of its own?
GIEASON: My reaction? Hooray! Let's
have third-stream and fourth-
stream music and fifth-stream music and
sixth stream and whatever. Let's just
have more music. There's nothi
herently good or bad in the
new kind of music which will draw
from various musical heritages. This
may turn out to bc a very good thing.
Some of it has already turned out to be
quite interesting.
KENTON: I'd agree that music is music,
but as for “third stream,” I think it's
just a kind of merchandising idea. I've
been interested in the development, but
I don't think thei nything new there,
ADDERLEY: Well, I'm the last person to
‘courage anyone's interest in trying to
do something dillcrent. However.
much as I respect and admire the willing-
ness of the third-sueam people to work
hard, their music misses me most of the
ime. I listen to a lot of classical music,
and it secms to me that most of what
they're doing with the “third stream”
has already been developed further by
the more venturesome classical com-
posers. Besides, Duke ЕП а
shown us how to develop jazz from
within to do practically anything. On
- the other hand, we know how ridiculous.

music

Stravinsky's Ebony Concerto is.
MULLIGAN: As Dizzy said, we already use
certain devices that can be traced to

some kind of classical influence. But this
idea of an autonomous music — separate
from both jazz and classical music— I
don't see any need for it. That's not to
say 1 wouldn't like to write things for,
or play with, a symphony, but whether
a "third stream” should come along and

have its own niche is something else.
It sccms to mc it's going to have to be
absorbed into one or the other main
stream.

RUSSELL: A third stream isn't necessary. In
fact, jazz itself may be the main stream
of music to come. I mean that, to me,
jazz is an evolving cla mu:
my own work, I don’t draw that heavily
on traditional classical standards. I have
been influenced by composers like
tk, Stravinsky and Berg, but if those
influences go into my music, it's un-
conscious. A conscious attempt to com-
binc the two is not my way of doing
ћи You see, I think jazz itself is the
classical music of America, and eventually

it will transcend even that role and
become, in every profound musical
sense, an international classical mu

BRUBECK: When wasn't jazz what you de-
scribe as third-stream music? Melod-
ically, from the beginning, jazz has been
mostly Europcan. Harmonically. it's been
mostly Europcan. "The forms used have
been mostly European. In fact, the first

written. jazz form was the rag and that
was

copy of the European march. 1
k it’s time we realize that we couldn't
have had jazz without the merging of the

African culture with the

ture. But in the beginning it was pri
marily a European music transformed to
fulfill the expression of the Ame
Negro. Once having acknowledged that,
we ought to forget about who did what
and when and we ought to forget
whether jazz is African or European. Jazz
now is an American art form and it’s be-
ng played all over the world.

PLAYBOY: To get back to the idea of the
“third stream,” Gunther, as the n
most closely identified with the concept,
do you still think it is a viable approach?
SCHULLER: Absolutely, and this is con-
firmed for me almost every day of my
c— especially this past summer at
Tanglewood, where I was very much i
touch with what vou could call a cross
section of the young American musica
generation. Tanglewood draws its 200
students from all over the country; and
even in this citadel of nonjazz music,
at least 30 to 40 percent of the young
musicians there were in some sense i
volved with jazz or could play it. And
some of them played it extremely well.
Now, these musicians epitomized what
1 feel about third-stream music, and that
is the elimi ion of a radical barrier
or difference between jazz and classical
music. To the kids, there is no such big
difference. It’s all cither good or not-so-
good music. And the question of jazz
style or monjazz style is пог a fund
mental issue with them. They deal with
much more fundamental musical criteria
n whatever style, good or
bi This means that the third-stream
movement, whether the critics or cer-
tain musicians happen to like it or not,

n

is developing by itself — without any
spccial cfforts on anybody's part.
ADDERLEY: My feeling, though, is that
when you deal with something like third.
stream, which mixes jazz with classical
music, you're going to weaken the basic
identity of jazz.
SCHULLER: It’s true that many people
worry about the guts being taken out
of jazz as it evolves, They worry about
it becoming “whitened.” However, jaz
has indeed basically changed into some-
thing different from what it started as.
It started as folk music, as a very earthy,
almost plainly social expression of a
downtrodden people. It then became a
dance music, an entertainment music —
still with roots in the very essence and
heart of life. It was not an art music.
Now, as it becomes an art music — and.
dy has in
ain people it will
change irs character. The process is in-
evi
PLAYBOY: In some of your statements so
far, the term "art music" has been used.
in connection with jazz. The French cri
Andié Hodeir would agrec that jazz
becoming more and more of an art
Te also says, however, that jazz
never really a popular music any-
although ^ jazzinfluenced bands
w large audiences in the 1930s.
e, he claims that now, as jazz
is inevitably evolving into an art music,
its audiences are going to be small and

select — similar, in a way, to the audi
ences for ch Do
you agree?

KENTON: Yes. Jazz, to start with, is not a
popular music at all. [t's true that a lot
of the bands in the Golden Era of bands
were kind of jazz oriented and did quite

well playing dance music and swing,
but real jazz has no greater followin
throughout the world today than has

al music. I

way it's going to be.

GLEASON: 1 don't agree that. ; audi-
ences are going to become smaller and
morc select. If. Count. Basie's band and
Duke Ellington's band weren't jazz
bands, and aren't jazz bands, then I dont
know what are. Woody Herman's also.
And these ba jous times have
had very large audiences. Benny Good-
man’s biggest successes were scored with
bands that were really jazz bands, not
just jazzinfluenced. bands.

BRUBECK: "That's right. In the late 1930s
and the beginning of the 1940s, I saw
ands with some

c called Stockton,
where I was going to college. It's pretty
much off the beaten path, so if you
could draw large audiences there at
that time, you could draw large audi

Y in the United States.
Duke Ellington was there for à week

35

PLAYBOY

36

and he had a full house every night.
Jimmie Lunceford was there. Stan
Kenton came through. Woody Herman.
Count Basie. Now, I wouldn't call those
bands jazz influenced. They were influ-
encing jazz. 1 think Hodeir is referring
to some other bands that may have been
more popular, but 1 hardly think they
were that much more popular. The
bands then were set up to be more
entertaining tham we are today— but
they were also playing great musi
do agree with Hodeir that jazz is be-
coming much more of an art music.
In other words, we aren't putting on a
show and good jazz at the same timc.
We're each of us putting on our own
individual brand of Jazz, and it's not
meant to be entertaining in the sense
that it’s a show. But it's entertaining in
the sense that ius good music, sincere
music that we hope reaches an audience.
Maybe this absence of show" does
put jazz into the artmusic category, but
I for one wouldn't mind secing jazz go
back to the days of the 1930s when you
had more ng bands, such as
Ellington's. And don't forget that Elling-
ton, while he was entertaining, was also
able to create a Black, Brown and Beige.
But jazz is not going to go back
to the 19305. And 1 r ‚о
the extent that jazz ever has been a
really popular music, it has been the
result of a certain commercialization of
jazz elements. Even with the best of the
jazz bands, like Fletcher Henderson's,
their style wasn't popular. What be-
cune popular was à certain simplifica-
tion of that style as it was uscd by
Benny Goodman.

ADDERLEY: І don't agree with Hoc ) 1
don't think jazz ever will cease to be im-
portant to the layman, simply because
the layman has always looked to jazz for
some kind of escape from the crap in
popular culture. Anybody who ever
heard. the original form of Stardust
hardly believe what has happened to it
through the efforts prima
musicians. Listen to the music on tele-
vision. Even guys who think in terms
of Delius and Ravel and orches e for
television shows draw from jazz. The jazz
audience has always existed, and it al-
ways will.

RUSSELL: І think there'll be a schism in
the forms of jazz. There definitely will
be an art jazz and a popular j Jazz.
matter of fact, that si
GILLESPIE: I'm optimistic. Yes, the audi-
ence will become select, but it won't
be small. Let me put it another way:
The audience will become larger but it
will be more selective in what it likes.
SCHULLER: I don't see how. The people who
are going to become involved with jazz,
as it's developing now, are going to be-
come very much involved. You just can't
assively as you could. for in-
nce, the псе music of the bands in

the 1930s. You could be comparatively
passive about them. But if you're going.
to be involved with Ornette Coleman at
all you've got to be involved very
deeply. or else it goes right past you.
We must expect a smaller audience
from now on, and there's nothing wrong
in that. A sensitive audience is a good
audience. Because of what's happened to
the music, we can no longer expect the
kind of mass appeal that certain very
simplified traditions of jazz were able
to garner for a while.
MINGUS: None of you has dealt with
another aspect of this. This talk of small,
select audiences will just continue the
brainwashing of jazz musicians. 1 think
of Cecil Taylor, who is a great musici;
He told me one time, “Charlie, 1 don't
want to make any money. I don't ex-
pect to. I'm an artist." Who told people
that artists aren't supposed to feed their
families beans and greens? I mean, just
because somebody didn't make money
hundreds of years ago because he was an
artist doesn’t mean that a musician
should not be able to make money to-
nd still be an artist. Sure, when
you sell yourself as а whore in your
music you can make a lot of money.
But there are some honest cars left out.
there. If musicians could get some eco-
nomic power, they could make money
and be artists at the same time.
PLAYBOY: Let's discuss the changing jazz
horizons even further. You, Dizzy, Miles
Davis and John Coltrane, among others,
have been studying folk cultures of other
of the world — North Africa, India,
etc. — and. have been incorporat-
ing some of thcse idioms into jazz ls
there any limitation to the variety of
materials which can be included in jazz
without jazz losing its own identity?
ADDERLEY: No, I don't think so. I think
that you can play practically anything so
long as your concept is one of bringing
it into jazz. We have some Japanese folk
music in our repertory which Yusef
teef has reorganized, and we're worki
on a suite of Japanese folk themes.
GLEASON: ‘Ihere’s no limitation to the
jety of mater

jazz losing its
own identity — provided the player is а
good jazz mus We've already had
the example of all sorts of Latin and
African rhythms brought into jazz. We
have bossa nova, which is an amalgam
of jaz and Afro-Brazilian music, and
we will have others. In fact, I think that
the bringing into jazz music of elements
of the musical heritage of other cultures
is a very good thing, and something that
should be encouraged.

MINGUS: It’s not that Sure, you can
pick up on the gimmick things. But 1
don't think they can take the true
essence of the folk music they borrow
from, add to it, and then say it's sincere.
I'm skeptical, because what they prob-

ably borrow are the simple things they
hear on top. Like the first thing a guy
will borrow from Max Roach is a par-
ticular rhythmic device, but that’s not
what Max Roach is saying from his
heart. His heart plays another pulse.
What I'm trying to say is that you can
bring in all these folk elements, but 1
think it's going to sound affected.

BRUBECK: J don't agree that it necessarily
has to sound that way. This is something
that has concerned me for a long time.
About 15 years ago, I wrote an article for
Down Beat — the first article I ever did
—and I said jazz was like a sponge. It
would absorb the music of the world.
And Гуе been working in this area, In
1958, I did an album, Jazz Impressions
of Eurasia, in which I used Indian
music, Middle Eastern music, and music
Mfluenced by certain countries in Eu-
rope. I certainly think jazz will become

a universal musical language. It's the
only music that has that capability.
because it is so close to the folk

music of the world—the folk music
of any country.

RUSSELL: I still have my doubts about this
approach. When I say 1 think jazz can
become a ur music, 1
mean it in the sense of pure classical
music. I don't. 1 by consciously melt-
ing the music of one culture with an-
other. I mean that jazz through its own
kind of melodic and harmonic and
rhythmic growth will become a universal
music. Furthermore, 1 find that Ameri-
can folk music in itself is rich enough to
be utilized in terms of this new wi
thinking. But as for going
or Near Eastern cultures, it's not neces-
sary for me. Oh. 1 can sec its value as
a hypnotic device — you know, inducing
a sort of hypnotic effect upon an audi-
ence. But many times that doesn't really
measure up musically. It doesn’t produce
a music of lasting universal value. And
capable of producing

I think jazz is

а music that is as universal and as
artistic as Bach's.
GILLESPIE: I’m with Ralph Gleason on

this. So long as you have a creative jazz
musician doing the incorporating of
other cultures, it can work. Jazz is so
robust and has such boundless energy
that it can completely absorb many dif-
ferent cultures, and what will come out
will be jazz.

PLAYBOY: We're beginning to hear the
language of jazz spoken in many tongues;
more and more jazzmen of ability are
making themselves heard all over the
world — Russia, Japan, Thailand,
everywhere. John Lewis of the Modern
Quartet claims that it will soon no
longer be the rule that all important
jazz innovations and innovators—
start in America. Instead, the most influ-
ential jazz player of the next decade
may suddenly arise in Hong Kong. Do
you think this prediction is accurate,

or will a jazzman still need seasoning in
America before he has the capacity to
contribute importantly to the music?
GILLESPIE: The prediction may be true,
but as of now, jazz is still inherently
American. It comes out of an American
experience. It's possible that jazzmen of
other cultures can use jazz through a
vicarious knowledge of its roots here or
maybe they can improvise their native
themes and their own emotional experi-
ences in the context of jazz It’s also
possible that one day American jazz will
become really, fundamentally, intern:
tional In fact, I think that the cul
tural integration of all national art
forms is inevitable for the future. And
when that happens, a new type of jazz
will emerge. But it hasn't happened yet.
KENTON: I think it's altogether possible.
And it would be very good for the
American ego if an outstanding player
did come from left field somewhere.
ADDERLEY: I don't think there ever will be
an important, serious jazz musician from
anywhere but the United States, if only
because jazz musicians themselves are
not going to allow jazz to escape from
where it was developed. I'm talking
about real jazz.

SCHULLER: No, I don't agree. It’s not at
all inconceivable that in the next five
or ten years, an innovator could come
from Europe. Of course, it depends on
where you choose to draw your limita-
tions as to what jazz is. If you mean
Cannonball's kind of jazz, which is cer-
tainly in the main stream of jazz develop-
ment, then I'd agree with you. But jazz
сап no longer be defined in only that
way. Jazz has grown in such a way as
to include what even ten years ago
would have been considered outside of
jazz or very much on its periphery. The
music has grown to such an extent that
these things are now part of the world
of jazz; and as jazz reaches out and ex
pands and goes farther into these outer
areas, jazz will of necessity include play-
€rs who do not have this main strcam
kind of orientation. So that, this
larger sense—and I know this is the
statement is
entirely possible to
have important innovations come from
le this country. A genius can crop
ywhere.

Perhaps, but there has not been
a precedent yet for any major con-
tributor coming from any but our
country, or more specifically, from any
oth І mean, he's
had to have worked in New York at one
ne or another. I suppose the reason
for the importance of New York is the
mierchange that goes on among mu-
icians in this city, even when they're
1 contact. Also, there's a feeling of
panic and urgency in New York which
provides the trial by fire that seems to
make it happen. In New York, you al-

ways get a nucleus of people who haven't
seuled into a formula, who haven't
yet sold out lor comfort or for other
reasons. The nucleus of that kind of
musician seems to gather here, and they
inspire one another.

MULLIGAN: There's a catch in the ques-
tion. When you say "important inno-
vation,” that implies something dilferent
from talking about a great player who
will be influential on his instrument.
Alter all, guys have already come out of
other countrics who have influenced
people here. Django Reinhardt is a р
lect example. As Gunther says, there's
no telling where genius is going to come
from. But whether any major innov
tons in jazz are going to come from
abroad — something which will radically
change what went before — George 15
probably right, though I don't know
about the New York part of what he
says. What seems important to me — and
I've noticed this often—is that the
biggest problem jazz musicians from
other countries have is that they have
grown up in an entirely different kind
of musical background. Most of us in

this country are raised with not only
jazz, but all the popular music of what
ever particular

пе we're growing up
in. But foreign players don't have
that kind of ingrown background.
Yet, its also a little more complicated
than that. The reason I wouldn't be
surprised to see great players coming out
of other countries, and conceivably
creating something different on their
instruments, is that fellows who don't
speak English wind up phrasing differ-
ently. Many times, I hear players who
speak Swedish or French imitate the
phrasing of an American jazz player, but
it's not quite right, because the very
phrasing of an American jazz player
reflects his mode of speech, the accent of
his language, even his regional accents.
Perhaps, when forcign horn men be}
reflecting their natural phrasing, we
get significantly different approaches,
KENTON: What we have to remember is
that while it's true that a foreign player
has to be exposed to American jazz be-
fore he can grasp the dimension and the
character of the music, that doesnt
mean he can't eventually contribute
hout even visiting the States. Ameri
can jazz musicians now are traveling so
much around the world that foreign
players can stay at home and be exposed.
to enough American jazz so that they can
become part of the music.

MINGUS: I don't sec it that way. Not the
way the world and this country is now.
Jazz is still an ethnic music, fundamen-
tally. Duke Ellington used to pl:
that this was a Negro music. He told
that to me and Max Roach, as a matter
of fact, and we felt good. When the
society is straight, when people really
are integrated, when they feel integrated,

ill

maybe you can have innovations coming
from someplace else. But as of now, jazz
is still our music, and we're still the ones
who make the major changes in it.
PLAYBOY: Do you believe there is any
political gain in the flow of jazz “am-
bassadors” overseas, or are we conning
ourselves when we think the enthusiastic
acceptance of a jazz unit in a foreign
country is a political advantage for us?
GILLESPIE; Well, mine was the first band
that the State Department sent in an
imbassadorial role, and I have no doubts
jazz can be an enormous political
plus. When a jazz group goes abroad
to entertain, it represents a culture and
creates an atmosphere for pleasure, ask-
ing nothing in return but attentiveness,
appreciation and acceptance — with no
strings attached. Obviously, this has to
be a political advantage.

I'm in favor of sending more
з overseas everywhere. Now.
whether this turns out to be a political
or not, I don't know. I do think
it’s a humanitarian and an artistic gain
I don't think we are totally conning our
selves as the United States of. America
when we consider the enthusiastic recep-
tion of a jazz unit in a foreign country to
be a political plus. As "Tony Lopes, the
president of the Hong Kong Jazz Club,
remarked recently, "You can't be anti
American and like jazz" But 1 don't
think that any amount of jazz exported
to Portugal, for instance, will ever make
the attitude of the American Govern-
ment toward the government of Portu-
gal accepted by the Portuguese people as
a good thing. Same thing for Spain and
the rest of the world. But no one has
yet seen a sign: AMERICAN JAZZMAN, GO
HOME!

ADDERLEY: Sure, I think having a jazz mu-
sician travel under the auspices of the
State Department is a good thing. It
can signify to the audience for which it
is intended that the United States Gov-
ernment thinks that jazz is our thing,
we're happy with it, and we want you to
hear some of it because we think i
beautiful.

RUSSELL: But there's an element of hypoc-
risy there. The very people who send
jazz overseas are not really fans of jazz,
and the country in whose name jazz is
traveling as an “ambassador” completely
ignores its own art form at home. It's
not going to hurt the musician who goes,
however, because music traditionally is
known for its ability to unite at least
some of the people. At least, the people
in power do recognize the capacity jazz
has to unite people.

ADDERLEY: Yes, it can unite people, but
politically, I don't think jazz docs a
damn thing. I don't think it influences
anybody that way. I think the Benny
Goodman tour had nothing to do with
helping create a democratic attitude
a Communist country.

37

PLAYBOY

38

BRUBECK; Th е other kinds of polit
cal effects. I certainly think that when
the Moiseyev Dancers were here, there
was kind of a friendship toward Russia
which was communicated through almost
every TV set tuned to those people. The
effect was like saying, “Well, the Rus-
sians can't be too bad if they've got
great, happy people like these dancers,
singers and entertainers. They must be
very much like us. In fact, they might
be better dancers.” And communication
from jazz groups going overseas is the
same thing in reverse. After all, when
we werc in India during the Little Rock
crisis, it made the headlines in the In-
dian newspapers seem maybe not quite
so bclicvable to an Indian audience that
had just seen us. Our group was inte-
grated, and the headlines were making it
sound as if integration was impossible
п the United States. But right before
their eyes, they saw four Americans who
scemed to have no problems on that
score. And I think there are other assets
as well.

SCHULLER: I was able to get an idea of thc
impact of jazz in Poland and Yugo-
slavia a few months ago. It’s hard for
anyone who hasn't been there to realize
the extent to which people abroad,
especially in Iron Curtain countries now,
admire Jazz and what it stands for. I
mean the freedom and individuality it
represents. However, in many cases, they
don't even think of it as a particularly
American product. They regard it simply
as the music of the young or the music
of freedom.

One thing that does concern me about
sending jazz overseas is the occasional
lack of care in selecting the musicians
who go. The countries where many
of these mu: ns have been sent have
been much more hip than our State
Department.

MINGUS: 1 wish the Government was
more hip at home. They send jazz all
over the world as an art, but why doesn't
the Government give us employment
here? Why don't they subsidize jazz the
way Russia has subsidized its native arts?
As I said before, rather than go on a
State Department tour overseas, I'd pre-
fer to play for people here. The working
people. The kids.
PLAYBOY: Whether ab
has the scope of ја
point at which the term
too confining?

KENTON: I feel the same way about the
word jazz as some other musicians do.
The word has been abused. I think it
was Duke Ellington who said a couple
of years ago that we should do away
with the word completely, but if you
do, another word will take its place. I
don't think thc situation would be
changed at all.

BRUBECK: Yes, Duke has spoken of drop-
the word jazz. I agree with him.

d or at home,
widened to the
jazz" itself is

Just call it contemporary American
music, and I'd be very happy. But if you
keep calling it jazz, it doesn't make me
unhappy.

ADDERLEY: The word doesn't bug me in
the least. In fact, Fm very happy to
associate myself with the term, because
I think it has a very definite meaning to
most people. It means something differ-
ent, something unique. Furthermore, 1
like to be identified with all that “jazz”
represents. All the e nd all the good.
All the drinking, loose women, the nar-
cotics, everything they like to drop on
us. Why? Because when I get before
people, I talk to them and they get to
know how I feel about life and they can
asceri that there is some warmth or
maybe some morality in the music that
they never knew existed.

RUSSELL; The term isn't at all burden.
some to me. I like to accept the chal-
lenge of what "jazz" means in terms of
the language we inherited and in terms
of trying to broaden it. The word and
what it connotes play a part in my
musical thinking. It forces me sometimes
to restrict so that it will come
out with more rhythmic vitality. In
other words, occasionally I'll sacrifice
tonal beauty for rhythmic vitality.
GLEASON: Once again, I'm not sure what
the question means. In one sense, jazz
covers the whole spectrum of popular
music in the country. There are aspects
of jazz in rhythm and blues, rock 'n'
roll, Van Alexander's dance band, the
Three Suns. So I don't know whether
can expand too far or not. Everybody
means what he means when he says jazz.
He doesn't always mean what you or I
mean. And 1 don't think there's any
reason to sit around looking foi ew
word, because we're not going to invent
a new word. When the time come:
it ever does — lor a new word, it wi
rive. Down Beat conducted a rather silly
contest some ycars ago to select a new
word for jazz, and came up with "crew-
cut” That word had a vogue which
lasted for precisely one issue of Down
Beat.

MINGUS: Well, the word jazz bothers me.
It bothers me because, as long as I've
been publicly identified with it, I’ve
made less money and had more trouble
than when I лї. Years ago, 1 had a

n ide:

very good job in California writing for
Dinah Washingto 1 several blues
singers, and I also had a lot of record

dates. Then by some chance I got a
write-up in a "jazz" magazine, and my
name got into one of those "jazz" books.
As I started watching my “j
tion grow, my pocketbook got empti:
I got more write-ups and came to New
York to stay. So 1 was really in “jaz
and | found it carries you anywhere
from a nut house to poverty. And the
people think you're making it because
you get write-ups. And you sit and starve

and try to be independent of the crooked
managers and agencies. You try to make
it by yourself. No, I don't get any good
feeling from the word jazz.

PLAYBOY: Some critics have remarked on
the scarcity of significant jazz singers
in recent years. Is this a correct assump-
tion, or have the critics too narrowly
defined what they consider “authentic”
jazz singing? Do you feel there will be
an important place for singing in the
jazz of the future, and what changes are
we likely to have in the concept of jazz
singing?

KENTON: Well, I don't know as we've ever
had a great raft of jazz singers. There
have been singers who border on јал
and whose styles have a jazz flavor, but
there haven't been many out-

d-out
jazz singers. I mean somebody like Billie
Holiday who was 100 percent jazz. You
could even hear it in her speaking voice.
No, I don't think were any shorter of
that Kind of jazz singer than we were
20 years ago.

GLEASON: Agreed. There has always been
a scarcity of significant jazz singers. And
there will always be an important place

for singing in jazz. | don't see any
changes, however, that were likely to
have in the concept of jazz 5 . The

things that were done by Ran Blake
and Jeanne Lee seem to me to have
almost nothing to do with the possibili-
ties of expanding the scope of jazz sing-
ing. Carmen McRae is the best jazz
singer alive today and what she's doing
is really simple, in one sense. And
because of that simplicity, it’s exquisitely
difficult.
ADDERLEY: The question is a hard one for
me, because 1 don't know just what а
j is. What does the term mean?
1 our Billie Holidays, El
Fitzgeralds, and Mildred Baileys and
ah Vaughans, but they've been largely
jaz oriented. and jazz associated. Any
real creative jazz innovation has been
done by an instrumentalist. In other
words, to me jazz is instrumental musi
so that, although I'll go along with
term like jazz oriented, I don't recognire
jazz singer as such.
MULLIGAN: I agree with that. I've always
thought of jazz as instrumental mu
To be sure, there have been singers who
were influenced by the horn players –
and а lot of them wound up being ex:
cellent singers who learned things
phrasing that they would never have
learned otherwise. But fundamentally,
the whole thing of improvising with a
rhythm on a song, or improvising on a
progression, is instrumental. It always
bugs me when I hear singers trying to do
the same things the horns do. The voice
is so much more flexible than the hom,
it seems unnecessary for a singer to try
to restrict himself and make himself as
i in his motion as a hom. To an-
(continued on page 56)

bou

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DETROIT (Special)-With the opening cf the Detroit Playboy
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Beautiful Bunnies: The spark-

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THIS IS ETHEL ENNIS
SHE TAKES YOUR HEART AWAY... A

(and leaves you breathless)

А voice like Ethel Ennis’ doesn't happen very often. The moment you
hear her sing, you sense greatness. She goes straight to the heart of
a song. Delivers it with special finesse, warm confidence and a beguil-
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lend an ear to the likes of "Who Will Buy?” You'll lose your heart.

Ethel Ennis: a great new talent on RCA VICTOR e

The most trusted name in sound

THE PLAYBOY FORUM

an interchange of ideas between reader and editor
on subjects raised by “the playboy philosophy”

MORAL REVOLUTION
The Playboy Philosophy is the start
of a Moral Revolution. If you can't wear
a bikini don't try to pass a law so your
husband won't sce anyone else wearing
one. Rejoice, for our children will have
and enjoy life
as it was intended. The wicked influence
country today is not rLayboY and
the Bunnies, but the "Christian-Minded
Mothers.

Mrs. John Hamilton
Arlington, Virgir

A CRAZY ATTITUDE

As a psychiatrist and sociologi:
I add my voice to the chorus of approval
meeting cach new chapter of The
Playboy Philosophy. Y think what you
have to say, especially about the matier
of sexual mores, is incisive, correct and
completely to the point. In my own
sphere, which includes writing and teach-
. I have been expressing the same
thing for some years. What Mr. Hefner
is saying over and over, and very well

id very зе
have in our Judaco-Chr
pretty crazy attitude toward sex and the
human body.

George R. Andrews, M.D.
Wausau, Wisconsin

BIRTH CONTROL IN CONNECTICUT

Many cducators, including myself,
wish to thank you for the great service
you are doing for this country by pub-
lishing The Playboy Philosophy. Your
mame is becoming synonymous on the
n's campuses with intellectual cre-
vity and freedom.

I think you may find interesting this
cerpt from cle in America. the Cath-
olic magazine, dated October 15, 1960:
Also before the [Supreme Court]
wi 1 be the much-controverted Connecti-
cut statute making it illegal for doctors to
give patients contraceptive advice. Con-
necticut defends its statute as a valid ex
cise of the state's power to protect public
» But a New Haven doctor contends
1 since the life of one of his female
ients would be endangered by ап-
other pregnanc reasonable of the
Taw to deprive her of contraceptive advi
The constitutional question is whether
this * ableness” constitute:
nial of the due process of law gi
teed by the Fourteenth Amendment.

ati

"The Connecticut Supreme Court of
Errors held last December that the law
was not unrcasonable, because means of
avoiding pregnancy other than contra-
ceptives were available. (Unfortunately a
growing number of Americans look
upon contraception as their inalienable
right) If the Federal Supreme Court
overrules the state com will in effect
declare that, so far as publicmorals laws
are concerned. unconstitutional means
unreasonable, which in turn means what-
ever is not supported by the pr n
climate of opinion. Such a decision
would have far-reaching impli ns."

Would it be possible to publish
PLAYBOY in a deluxe edition, along the
lines of American Heritage and Eros
There are many people who would sub-
scribe to the deluxe edition, I am sure.

(Name withheld on request)
The University of Arizona
‘Tucson, Arizona

This editorial statement from America
magazine is a remarkable example of
the extent to which a number of well
educated, literale Americans do not
comprehend the significance of the sep-
aration of church and state guaranteed
by our Constitution, and a right most
certainly violated by the state statute
that prohibits a physician in Connecticut
from disseminating information on birth
control to his patients, cuen when they
request it. U.S. laws are supposed to
exist for the protection, health and wel-
fare of all of the citizens, and nol to
perpetuate any one religious dogma over
the rest. This state statute clearly fails
to meet that standard.

The U.S. Supreme Gourt decision in
this case avoided any finding on the
merits: the high Court refused to re-
verse the Connecticut Court of Errors on
the technical ground that the birth-
control statute was not being actively
enforced in the state and so no real
controversy existed (the case was one of
several brought at about the same time
by members of the faculty of the Yale
Law School who wanted to test the
constitutionality of the law). The tech-
nical grounds upon which the U. S. Su-
preme Court failed to reach a decision
in the case are unfortunate, in our opin-
ion, for as Editor-Publisher Hefner
points out in a discussion of U.S. sex
statutes in this month's. installment. ој
“The Playboy Philosophy,” laws can be

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PLAYBOY

42

а coercive force in society even when
they are not actively enforced and their
very existence tends to generate a dis-
respect for all laws and law enforcement
among the common citizenry.

The America editorial is n remarkable
example of the extent to which some
religious zealots believe our entire soci-
ely should be forced to live by their
own personal religious-moral convictions.
There is nothing unfortunate about the
fact that “a growing number of Ameri-
cans look upon contraception as their
inalienable righi” What is unfortunate
is that any American minority has so
little respect for their fellow cilizens that
they would wish to deny them this right
Christian Scientists, whose religion for-
bids the use of modern medical science
for the treatment of a variety of physical
ills, make no atiempt to withhold these
services from others; Catholics, whose
religion forbids the use of modern birth-
control techniques, should similarly not
attempt to withhold the use of these tech-
niques from the vest of the general public.

WIFE SWAPPING
You are not hip—you're hyp! That's

short for hypocrite. After swallowing
most of your lengthy lines in The Pla
boy Philosophy, 1 turned to the Ad-
visor section in the August issue and
had quite a laugh reading your com-
ment to the fellow who had a wife-
swapping arrangement in the breeze.
Your answer to him was in the best Ann
Landers prudery tradition.

SFC Donald L. Jackson

FPO, San Francisco, California

In The Playboy Philosophy, Mr. Hel-
ner seems to condone extramarital sex-
ual relations, although he has only
skirted the subject and never put it
down in black and white. My concern
here is not that this idea is contrary to
my own (it should be left to the indi-
vidual), but that this is a part of your
"guiding principles and editorial credo.”
In the August issue, however, you ad-
vised a reader in G:
his desire for extrama
shows only an inadequacy in the mar-
riage or in one of the partners. Unless
I have misunderstood the Philosophy, it
seems you have turned into the worst of
all hypocrites—one who chides others
for their hypocrisics yet fails to sce the
proverbial “splinter” in your own cy
Just how do you account for this di
crepancy?

Frederick P. Clari

Massachusetts Institute of Technology

Cambridge, Massachusetts

There is no hypocrisy involved and.
mo contradiction between the views ex-
pressed in “The Playboy Philosophy"
and the August “Playboy Advisor." Hef-
ner has never endorsed adultery, he hos
simply stated that society has tended to

place too much negative emphasis on
sex and that, whether inside or outside
of marriage, personal sexual morality
should remain a private affair. The
Texas reader asked our opinion on
whether or not the wifeswapping ar-
rangement he contemplaied might im-
prove an already happy and successful
marriage and we told him, quite frankly,
we did not believe thal it would,

THE IMPORTANT POINT

Your series The Playboy Philosophy
is a most praiseworthy result of having
accepted the position of much-needed
spokesman for a way of life widely mis-
understood. And I find I can no longer
remain in the impersonal, passively
receptive dark, murmuring assent and
thinking of Conrad's phrase, “one of us.
In this schizoid society of ours, your
continuing emphasis on the concept of
the integration of man's seemingly
diverse activities, and your gearing of
the content of the magazine to this con-
cept, is the most important point in your
exposition of an attitude toward life.
The attribute involved is simply that of
an acute and constant awareness and
appreciation of life, derived from intel-
lect, education, taste, experience—and
that very particular combination of them
which determines the elusive character-
с— sophistication. And it engenders
an attitude consistent and common to all
of m:
tellect

tual, because in ri
these Ш interrelated in the ex-
periences of life. Only a concentrated,
negative effort can force a divergence.

among them.

ty

Chip Atwood
Charleston, West Virginia

THE MIND AND THE BODY

I wish to thank Mr. Hefner most
wholeheartedly for his statement in The
Playboy Philosophy in the July issue
concerning healthy attitudes toward se
views which, I'm sure, many of us may
possess, but are afraid to admi

It will be interesting to watch the
reaction to the Philosophy from your
readers. A few will undoubtedly write
screaming letters, protesting, “What has
happened to our morals and responsibili-
ties?” To this I would say, "Read the
Philosophy again; this time, very slowly
and with an open mind."

Why is it that the human mind which
can conceive such wonderful scientific
advances, after all these thousands of
years, still isn't able to accept its own
human body? 1 think that the advocates
of individual freedom, linked with moral
responsibility, still have a long struggle
against our Puritan antisex. | salute
PLAYBOY lor a step forward toward mod-
crn, realistic thinking and expression.

Mrs. G. R. Clarke 11
Burbank, California

SPURIOUS REALITY

The Neo-Epicurean format of your
magazine is surikingly consistent with the
current (since the Fall) infatuation with
Original Sin, The opportunity for un-
expurgated and nicely arranged specu-
lation about man and woman, and the
something in between, has never been
greater — thanks to the famous and
famous thinkers of bygone eras, when
censorship was axiomatic and free

expression merited a distasteful inver-
sion of one’s physical features. But in
our enlightened times, a national publi-

well-read and,

nds,

phisticates and their
presumably, well-informed fh

somewhat akin to the process of distilling
flesh and blood into a mechanical s
rogate for mind and body (a soft robot).

Such a charge does not call for serious
ion, because of the uncqual
distribution of human intelligence: some
of your readers are being deceived: some
know they are being deceived and like
it; and some know that others know they
are being deceived, and read out of
congenital perversity. There are always
those who conceive of your magazine as
a kind of “postal onanism” and proceed
to compile a list of the fallacies behind
your slick opcratioi

While 1 choose to abstain from this
truly interminable debate, I must ex-
press my contempt for men who go
through varied intellectual motions and
fail to emerge with any original insights
into the unknown aspects of love and.
sex, work and leisure, erotic delight and
Apollonian discipline. Under the guise
of being entertaining and provocative,
you present antiquated verbal aphrodis-
lacs, banal and supercilious prose
querading as serious fiction, and an
endless assortment of pictorial candy,
easily accepted, but curiously unwhole-
some.

There is nothing wrong with a nude
young ошап in the flesh or on paper;
there is, indeed, an unequivocal right
ness about such a revelation. Che dith-
my consciousness begins when
at I am getting something for
nothing, c. look at the most intense-
ly exciting parts of a beautiful body
What have 1 done to deserve this? I
have plunked down 75¢ and presto! I
get lots of urbane commentary, some
refurbished Esquire jokes, and tangible
evidence that a Sexual Revolution has
not occurred.

No one can now (as opposed to Cal-
vinistic then) maintain that creature
comforts (such as PLAYBOY portrays
them) are inherently immoral or even
potentially harmful. The deficiency

seems to be caused by the implications
of your magazine's philosophy: the total
apotheosis of the American Bachelor
(married men are only handicapped
bachelors) through the unreflecting re-
production of his own idcals— a gro-
tesque, freakish barba
metamorphosis by the careful elimi
tion of those defects of character one
discerns im ordinary men, and emerges
triumphant over a kingdom of self-made
fantasies and patronizing subjects who
riot in his imagination and offer worship
to the picture he would have of himself
—rather than the пис m: that is
pushed down into the limbo of neutral-
ity, the desensitized realm of a cultu:
rubbish heap of the mind.

Human nature is so constituted. that
it does not recover from the initial dis-
aster of the izing process — thus,
the world view that affirms m
stinctual needs must eftect a reconcili-
ation with the particular view of realit

n undergoes a

offered by а given culture. Traditional!
the world's most imaginative thinkers
have gone beyond instinctual needs and

have assumed that cognition is the serv-
at of the imagination, and that an
awareness of a nonmaterial reality is
n absolutely cssential step before the
discovery of “the forms of things un-
nown” — the great idcas that advance
man’s knowledge of himself by showing
him the forms of nding that
evolution and genetic pattern have de-
veloped. Direct experience is but the
raw material of lile — the outward phe-
nomena that man invests with meaning
with his symbolic configurations, his
artificial tools for grappling with the
interplay of spirit and matter.

Kanı provides the orientation: "In-
stead of human knowledge being shaped
to reality, it is our human judgme
which determines whatever is to have
the character of being rcality for us."

In my opinion the view of reality
offered by your magazine is a spurious
rcality, calculated to suit the palates of
immature men who are still in the proc-
ess of discovering themselves (and who
isn't) and allegedly mature males who
tolerate your approach because of the
psychological consequences of Not Being
Open-Minded About These Things.

I think, too, that the validity of your
verbal defenses is undermined by the
excessive dependence upon obvious facts.
The obvious significance of the five
senses and their encounter with mind
requires only the most rudimentary tal-
ent for the initial exposition; the test
comes when the sense of the numinous
collides with direct sensory experience.
And it is here that you falter.

‘There is no room in your philosophy
for the evolving cthic, the successful
integration of busic religious truths and
biological realities.

n short. 1 say that the farthest abys-

adersi

ses of being remain untouched in the
willful expression of your world view,

and I say that the denomination of "an
ment medium”

entert does not create
new cpistcmological distinction: you
are dealing with ideas and images. Each
idea stimulated by a verbal or pictorial
symbol in your magazine is a representa-
tive of the image you hold of man. Docs
a new myth send man into the "night-
mare of history" or docs rLaysow hold
the gnarled truth in its jaded heart?
John Downey
Shenandoah, Pennsylvania

The vague verbiage of your lelter
tends 10 disguise the even vaguer reason-
ing. You criticize ptaywoy for offering
readers what you deem to be an unre-
flective and unreal image ој their own
ideals, then render the point nigh point-
less with a quote from Kant observing
that man has always been inclined to
shape reality to his own subjective judg-
ment rather than basing it on objective
knowledge and experience.

You describe it as “a spurious reality,
calculated 1o suit the palates of immature
men who are still in the process of dis-
covering themselves” — then neutralize
this negative view of vLaymoy's appeal
with the query “and who isn't?

rravsov’s philosophy includes some
subjective value judgments, to be sure:
we are inclined to take an optimistic
and quite positive view of man; to favor
man's quest for truth and beauty. We
believe Ihat man is a rational. being,
that reality is knowable and that society
should be based upon reason, rather than
rational faith or mysticism. We be-
lieve that ihe purpose of life is to be
found im living itself; that mans pri-
mary goal should be individual hap-
piness; and that man should be [ree to
explore the whole ој reality — іп the
world and in himself—to strive, to
achieve, to progress.

You avoid challenging any of these
premises and resort, instead, to extended
vagaries that attempt to equate PLAYBOY
with the very aspects of society that we
oppose. In thus slaying a paper tiger
of your own conception, you create the
impression of having done battle with
PLAYBOY and its philosophy without ever
having entered the arena of ideas or
ideals, And what view of man would you
prefer we hold: negative, pessimistic,
irrational, ugly, superstitious, mystical,
masochistic, sacrificial and impotent?

What “farthest abysses of being” (a
peculiarly negative phrase) would you
have us probe? You state that “The
Playboy Philosophy" is “undermined by
the excessive dependence upon obvious
facts,” which would seem the equiva-
lent of criticizing it for having made its
point too clearly and too well.

You brush aside, as requiring only
“rudimentary talent,” all logic and ex
position based upon “the five senses and

their encounter with mind,” thus dis-
missing in a phrase all rational inquiry
and objective reasoning. The true test
of man's intellection comes, you sug-
gest, “when the sense of the numinous
collides with direct sensory experience”
—thereby confusing h with
and subjective feeling with objective
knowledge, equating “divine revelation”
with intellectual inquiry and rational
insight.

You suggest that our view of man and
woman is unreal, but by emphasizing an
ethic and morality based upon reason,
we favor a world more closely aligned
with reality.

You state: "There is no room in your
philosophy for the evolving ethic,” but
our philosophy is based upon a belief in
an evolving ethic and opposed to the
view that man is not rational, reality
not knowable and that morality should
not be based upon reason.

We are, of course, “dealing with ideas
and images,” but the ideas are reasoned
and the image projected is a positive
and oplimistic one, in which society is
seen as the servant of man rather than
his master, and the emphasis is placed
upon the individual and his happiness,
achieved through the application of ra-
tional, objective thought.

reason

WHAT ABOUT THE BABIES?

May a female reader put in a word?
І agree completely with The Playboy
Philosophy, but anxiously await the ar-
tide telling us what to do with the
babies.

Mis. Virgi M. Dingman

Lawrence, Kansas.
Have them when you want them, and
only then. Raise them with. generous
proportions of love and logi

SEX AND RELIGION

І agree with The Playboy Philosophy
insofar as narrow-mindedness and cen-
sorship are concerned. I believe that
each family has the right to censor its
own reading material and I believe that
ach adult is capable of filtering out his
own dirt. Ви! I don't go for this cru-
sade for [ree love. That is not open-
mindedness — it is no-mindedness!

The human animal was created with
a mind to put him above the lower ani-
mals, He has a will and he has the power
to distinguish between right and wrong.
Free love is wonderful and it would be
fine if we didn't have a conscience.

You advocate sex as you would any
other sport. Just enjoy yourself and to
hell with the consequences. If everyone
went at it with gay abandon the world
would be full of little bastards. If you
think that we have a population explo-
sion "t seen nothin’ yet!

On the other hand, if everyone took
the necessary precautions, and they prob-

(continued on page 149)

now, you

43

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о
n
~
=
=
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other brews. In an age when so much about us is bland
and blah, it figured that decisive men would prefer this
new kind of brew. It has character. Country Club's spe-
cial fermenting agent gives it a lively quality that,
frankly, appeals mostly to men. You'll find it smooth
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a short head it has—so it sits light throughout an

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THE PLAYBOY PHILOSOPHY

the fifteenth part of a statement in which playboy's editor-publisher spells out—for friends
and critics alike—our guiding principles and editorial credo

DURING THE DARK aces, the medieval
Church dominated almost every level of
European society. Many of the Church
leaders were negatively obsessed with
sex, to a degree unknown in early Chris-
tianity, and this antisexuality was per-
petuated by both ecclesiastical and
Church-influenced secular Јам.

It might be expected that the Refor-
mation would have produced a freer
society — one less inclined to sexual sup-
pression and less controlled by an
liance between church and state — but
as we have indicated in
ments of The Playboy Philosophy, it had
no such effect.

Many of the original settlers in Amer-
ica left the Old World to escape religious
persecution, so it might be supposed that
here, finally, man would seek the per-
sonal moral and religious freedom that
had been so long denied him. Indeed,
our own founding fathers took seriously
the lesson to be learned from the cen-
turies of religious tyranny in Europe
and gave us a Constitution and a Bill
of Rights that guaranteed the separation
of church and state (that they might
both be free); and Thomas Jefferson
wrote, in the Declaration of Independ-
ence, of each individual's unalienable
rights to life, liberty and the pursuit of
happiness.

But how successful have we been in
protecting these ideals for both ourselves
and our fellow citizens? Just how per-
sonally free is each one of us in modern
America? The dream of individual free-
dom persists, but are we actually al-
lowed to live our own lives, rejoice in
our liberty, and pursue our personal
concepts of happiness — limited only by
the extent that we infringe upon the
like rights of others?

Incredible as it should seem, and de-
spite all Constitutional guarantees to
the contrary we do not enjoy a true
separation of church and state in the
U.S. tod: "ach citizen our democ-
racy has a right to expect that the laws
of his Government have been established
and will be enforced in a rational man-
ner consistent with the aims and. protec
itution. But many of
vs are not based on any such
se; they are evolved, instead, from

editorial By Hugh M. Hefner

old ecclesiastical laws, from religious be-
liefs and dogma, to which some of our
citizens subscribe, and many others do
not.

Liberal religious leaders are among the.
most outspoken opponents of this church-
state alliance, but much of the organized
religion in America still includes a dis-
tinct element of antisexualism — a carry-
over from the teachings of the medieval
Church and the Protestant Puritanism
that followed it. And it is, therefore, in
our laws related to sex that we find the
greatest church-state intrusion upon our
personal freedom.

SEX AND THE LAW

Tod: in the U.S. we have reli-
giously oriented statutes limiting free-
dom of speech and press, statutes regu-
lating personal sex behavior, marriage,
divorce, birth control, abortion and pros-
Uitution, that are based not upon a
concern for the health, happiness and
welfare of the individual, but upon
various concepts of religious morality.
Thus sin and crime become intermixed
and confused — and the religious views
of a portion of society are forced upon
the rest of it — through Government co-
ercion — whether they are consistent with
the personal convictions of the indi-
vidual or not.

We will consider, in this
of the specific statutes
sexual behavior and the

extent to
which these laws are at odds with the

sex practices of a sizable portion of the
population— making us a mation of
criminals. Some consideration. will be
given, too, to the wide disparity in the
sex laws of the va ates — making
it possible, quite literally, for a couple
to indulge in intimacies within the pri-
vacy of their home that are perfectly
legal, while another couple enga;
the same activity in a house a block
away (but in the jurisdiction of an ad-
joining state) is guilty of a crime that
caries а ten-year prison sentence. We
will also discuss the wholly arbitrary
manner in which the: arious laws are
enforced, or not enforced, and the effect
such capricious law enforcement has

is si

upon the entire fabric of law and order,
in addition to the injustices thus per-
petrated.

In our examination of U.S. sex law,
it should not be assumed that wc neces-
sarily approve of all of the behavior
thus brought under legislative control
of the state. We will establish, in a later
installment. of this editorial series, what
we personally consider to be a hi
sexual morality for a
The point to be made here is not that
we find this sex behavior either moral
or immoral, but that the moral qucs-
tions involved — when they relate to
private sex between consenting adults
— are the business of the individual and
his personally chosen religion, and not
the business of our Government.

Tr must be mentioned, too, that this
view of the matter is shared by a num-
ber of our most highly respected reli-
gious leaders and with a majority of the
leading legal minds who constitute. the
American Law Institute, which author-
ized the publication of a Model Penal
Code in 1955 recommending that all
consensual relations between adults in
private should be excluded from the
criminal law. The logic underlying this
recommendation was that "no harm to
the secular interests of the community is
involved in atypical sex practice in pi
vate between consenting adult partners"
(and, as we shall see, much of the be-
havior legislated against is anything but
atypical): and, further, that “there is the
fundamental question of the protection
to which every individual is entitled
against state interference in his personal
rs when he is not hurting other

Although this Model Ре Code to
govern sexual behavior was published
nearly nine years ago, no state has yet
reshaped its laws along the lines recom-
mended by the Law Institute — despite
the fact 0 one of the primary pur-
poses of this illustrious judicial body is
the drafting of such model codes as a
guide to making more uniform and
reasonable the statutes in all 50 of the
United States.

MARRIAGE AND DIVORCE

Sin and crime are not synonymous. As
Morris Ploscowe, a former judge of the

45

PLAYBOY

46

Magistrates’ Court of the City of New
York and presently Adjunct Associate
Professor of Law at New York University,
points out in the preface to his book
Sex and the Law: “The fact that certain
behavior is sinful should not necessarily
make it criminal. The policeman, prose-
cutor and jailer cannot replace the priest,
minister or rabbi in the control of sex
behavior." Not attending church, temple
or synagogue, eating meat on certain
days, or cating certain kinds of meat at
any time, are sins to some members of
our society, but they are not crimes. In
the final analysis, personal morality (sex-
ual or otherwise), when it docs not in-
fringe upon the rights of others, should
be left to the determination of the in

dividual.
No one can reasonably question the
powerful role that sex plays in all our

lives. It is a dominant force in society
It can be a force for cither good or evil,
but sex in itself is neither.

Some believe that the sol
purpose of sex is procreation, but there
great deal more to sex than that
It is the single greatest civilizing force
on earth. Without this attraction be
tween the sexes, the world would be a
very strange, barbaric place. Our society
its culture, its interests and desires, and
many of our major motivations are based
upon sc

Because of its power, man carly learn
to fear вех, and in pre-Christi i
many worshiped
the fear into became
associated with guilt and shame. To cope
with this force within them that they
did not understand, early Christians es-
tablished complex laws to control sex.
These religious laws have been паса
down through the centuries to the pres-
cnt day, and form the basis for our own
sot and legal controls over ses

Ploscowe comments, "Our legal and
social attitudes toward sex bear the un-
mprint of carly doctrines of
ity. Sex was evil to the
carly Christians, while the
sexual activity, virginity, and cha
were great goods. All forms of sexual
relations between unmarried persons
were mortal sins. Even sexual thoughts
unaccompanied by exte (ts were
sinful. Sex activity was permissible only
in marriage, whose necessity was grudg-
ingly recognized by the early Christians."

Marriage thus became the answer de
veloped by society to satisfy the sex
drives of men and won But what
about the two thirds of our society who
ure biologically adult, but unm;

or primary,

rriage thus becomes a church-state
practice sex. Without this
religious-governmental approval, sex is
forbidden. Thus, in a supposedly free
society, our most personal actions arc

license to

regulated. by the state.
1 to marriage that a
anulled where one of
the members of the union proves incap-
able of performing coitus. Morcover, pro-
longed sexual intimacy between two
unwed individuals may actually create a
state of m s) in the
of the state.
The precise legal nature of marriage
1 our society is not casily understood.
It is a good deal more than a civil con-
tract. As Ploscowe points out, "If the
s to a commercial agreement are

not satisfied with its terms, they may
without consulting any public authority
rescind or modify them. What they do
with a contract is their own concer:

No such freedom exists in marriage.
A husband and wife cannot, of their own
ition, agree to dissolve a marriage
. A divorce or annulment must
be granted. by the government, and it
must be for legally sufficient reasons, and
mot simply because the two parties in-
volved desire it. What is morc, the legal
reasons for granting a divorce ri
have anything to do with the real reasc
the two parties have for requesting it.

Ploscowe states, “[Our] conception of
marriage stems from the Roman 1,
But the lawyers of imperial Rome could
call a marriage contract with much
more justice than American Lawyers, for
Roman law permitted men and women
to dissolve thi riages at their own
will and. pleasure, without the interven-
tion of any public authority. Our law
has never given married people this
ithority."
Control over marriage gives the gov-
ernment control over sex. This need not
be true, but is the case in our society,
because sex is limited by law to th
married.

Control over sex is not the only rea-

that society is interested in the in-

stitution of marriage, however. Marriage
ad the family are considered an essen-
part of our social structure and, as
expressed by the court, in a New York
divorce dec (Fearon vs.
ge... is more than a person:
ation between a man and a woman.
lt is a status founded on contract and
established by law. It constitutes an in-
stitution involving the highest interests
of society. It is regulated and controlled
by law based on principles of public
policy alfecting the welfare of the people
of the state. -. . From time immemorial
the state exercised the fullest control
over the marriage relation, justly be
ing that happy. successful n шев con-
stitute the fundamental basis of the
gencral welfare of the people.
But if marriage is truly to be
stitution which serves the ge
fare of the people, a great many laws
and administrative procedures require
serious re-evaluation. Whose welfare is

e

Treanor):

served by divorce laws totally unrelated
to the actual causes for the dissolution
of a marriage? How can a court even
begin to come to grips with the problems
it faces in a suit lor divorce, if the
statutes regulating the court’s decision
stipulate only synthetic, legally accept-
able conditions that must be “met” in
order for a husband and wife to end an
unwanted marriage?

Each of the 50 states has its own particu-
Tar set of divorce statutes — some lenient,
some strict. The stricter the statutes, the
more artificial, and unrelated to the
actual causes of divorce, they are apt to
be. Nor are the stricter divorce laws any
serious deterrent to the breakup of ar
unsuccessful marriage.

A couple desiring a divorce simply
goes to а more lenient state to secur
more frequently, they tailor their
divorce complaint to suit their own
state's requirements. In other words.
with the able assistance. of their at-
torneys. they perjure themselves, And
here we have the first cxample, with a
great many more to follow, of how un-
realistic sex statutes turn ordinary
zens into criminals.

“The fewer the grounds for divorce,"
states Ploscowe. "the greater the incen-
tive to commit perjur
New York is an excellent example of
state with strict orce law: the
only ground for divorce in New York
is adultery, That is the requirement
n New York, if a
divorce — adultery. The
Bible says. “Thou shalt not commit
adultery”; but the State of New York
says, “If you want а divorce, you must!"

Despite what may appear to be a state

action of sin, a majority of New York-
ers seeking an end to an unhappy mar-
riage seem to prefer some manner of
legal subterfuge al sex.
Thus we were recently privileged to
witness the wife of the Governor of New
York journeying to another state to
secure a divorce on grounds that were
not legally acceptable in her own state.

More often, however, New Yorkers get
es at home — and if an adul-
terous айайт is not to their liking, the
state simplifies matters by making subter-
fuge and pe The law does not
require actual proof of sexual inter
course to grant a divorce on the ground
of adultery: it is sufficient if there was
an opportunity to commit adultery and
what the statute refers to as an “adul-
terous disposition." Thus, a husband
need only register at a hotel with a
n who is not his wife, followed
shortly thereafter by a prearranged raid
img party that сону Чу discovers
the pair in a state of partial undress or
in a "compromising position."
enough to justify the granting of a
divorce.

that must be

couple wishes

met

10 схиата

woma

This is

As a result, a thriving business has
sprung up that caters to this need for
prearranged “adultery.” In 1948 a group
of such "divorce mill” specialists was ex-
posed. and indicted in New York. They
offered two kinds of service to husbands
and wives who were seeking divorces: (1)
the set-up job, similar to the hotelvoom
raid described above, complete with an
“unknown woman” (or man, as the case
might require); id (2) the testimony
job, which was simply perjured testimony
about such a raid, concocted in the cor-
ridors of the courthou Hundreds of
divorces were secured by this ring, whose
cfarious doings were discovered when
one of their profession own
women,” a Mrs. Sara Ellis, became upset
over the small fees she had been receiv-
ing (cight to ten dollars a casc).

How docs any of this serve the y
eral welfare of the people? Obviously, it
does not. Our divorce statutes are based,
for the most part, not on reason or any
1 concern for public welfare, but on
religious convictions that are unrelated.
to the social problems that both cause
divorce and are the result of it.

The current irrational state of a
in divorce legislation can be corrected,
nd the general welfare of the people
best served, by (a) establishing uniform
divorce laws in the 50 separate states;
and (b) relating those laws to the actual

causes of divorce.
As we shall see, the problem of uni-
formity is a serious one that appears

throughout all of our U.S. sex legi
tion, It is responsible for what is termed
migratory divorce — a discriminatory sit-
wation which permits those able to af-
ford it to seek divorce in a state other
lation is
y а up temporary
residence there. This is noc only unfair
of lesser financial means, it
can also produce cases like the followi

that occurred in Wisconsin in 1948: A
n and woman were married in that
state. They separated, the wile moving
nesota, The husband then ob-
divorce in Wisconsin; under
Wisconsin Jaw, the divorce was not final
for one year. During the year, the woman
- Under Towa law this
second marriage was valid — the Wiscon-
sim one-year waiting period notwith-
standing. The newly married couple
returned to Wisconsin and set up hou
They were both convicted of adultery,
because under Wisconsin law the wife
(State

rema

1 is no more complicated than the
a couple no longer cares for
each other. It is to the best interests of

the husband and wife, as well as to d
best interests of the court and society a
a whole, to permit the couple contem-
plating divorce to seck it om honcst
grounds. By thus encouraging а frank
and open discussion of the marital prob-
lems that produced the proceeding, the

court is in the best possible position to
deal with the problems and possibly
save the marriage.

Where children are involved, a spe-
cial attempt should be made to salvag
the relationship, through the introduc-
tion of professional cou ad a
period of readjustment, Failing
however, the divorce should be granted.
on the simple and quite honest basis that
the couple no longer wishes to remain
husband and wife. Society does not bene-
ft from the forced perpetuation of a
marriage that is no longer desired by the
couple involved. More harm is done to
children raised in a family torn by dis-
unity, tension and personal dissa
tion than results from a broken home.
g divorce to be granted on

the basis of mutual consent, instead of
requiring a couple to meet arbitrary and
often artificial legal requirements, would

maximize the courts chances of savii
the marriage by eliminating the sig
cant element of subterfuge in present
divorce hearings. Despite this fact, Plos-
cowe observes ironically, in Sex and the
Law: "Divorce by consent may have
been good enough for the heathen
Romans of imperial Rome under the
dicium that s
mutual affection it is only right that
when the affection no longer exists it
should be dissoluble by mutual consent.”
It may have appeared attractive to the
mountaineers of the Swiss cantons. It
may have appeared desirable during pe-
ds of revolution and disorder like the
French and Russian Revolutions, when
all institutions of society tend to break
down. Divorce by consent may even have
been urged by great men such as John
Milton, Sir Thomas More, Jeremy Ben-
tham. and John Stuart Mill. However,
divorce by consent has never been recog-
nized by English or American Law.

It is feared that more realistic and,
therefore, more seemingly liberal laws
would appreciably increase the rate of
divorce, but even if the perpetuation
of unwanted marriages could be ration-
alized as beneficial to society, it is
doubtful that the present statutory
hodgepodge achieves that end. Despite
the seeming strictness of our present
statutes, divorce itself is commonplace
d can be secured with relative case by
any couple so inclined, At the turn of
the century, there was approx
divorce for every twelve marriages: by
1930, the ratio had jumped to one out
of every six; today, approximately one
marriage in four winds up in the divorce

ely one

Whatever else b these

may prove,

choice of mate, one
divorce and try again. We may pretend
10 live in a monogamous society, but a
great many of us are practicing what has.
been called sequential polygamy.

he polygamous nature of our society
Il pretense to the contrary — prompts
a side observation on marriage and reli-
gious freedom, unrelated to the problem
of divorce: The Mormon Church his-
torically countenanc , in which
one husband is permitted to take several
wives —all of whom dwell in a single
household, with their assorted offspring.
Despite the question of religious freedom
clearly involved, the Government prosc-
s any followers of the
religion seriously

to
“be fruitful and multiply" has U. S. Gov-

ernment approval only so long as it is
done with one spouse at a time.
Though the majority of us undoubt-
edly prefer our mates in sequence —
and, indeed, most husbands find thc
problems pre ingle wife quite
sufficient — it is difficult to see how the
welfare of society is served, when a man
wishes to take a new mate, by forcing
him to desert his original fami
Returning to the problem of divorce.
it seems doubtful that stricter laws would
help matters any — they would simply in
tensify courtroom subterfuge and render
the courts even less effective
with the actual s
Divorce should also bc recognized as

symptom of social dise: rather than
the disease itself: attempts at cure should

logically be directed more at the discase
marital unhappiness— than at the
symptoms, especially since the request
for a divorce represents one of the last
stages of an unstable marriage, when the
chances of cure are appreciably less than
they might previously have been.

Tt should also be recognized that the
substantial increase in the divorce rate
over the last half century does not песе
sarily represent a comparable incres
т; . It is reasonable to
ater number of di-
vorccs is more the result of a lessening
of society's taboos in that area and our
importance of
individual happ in presentday so
ciety; unhappy marriages were probably
just as common in 1900 as they are toda
but contemporary men and women are
more inclined to do something to solve
their unhappiness.

If society is sincerely interested in
happy, successful marriages as being
the best interests of the public welfare,

(continued on page 113)

se ii

47

Дов иу
HISTORY OF
PLAYBOY

humor By SHEL SILVERSTEIN part two of our bearded bard's
personal chronicle of the first ten years in the life of this publication

THE MIDDLE YEARS By the end of 1956 the prospering глуво had outgrown
its small offices on Superior Street and moved to the present Playboy Building on Chicago's
Near North Side, As PLAYBOY grew, office procedure became increasingly complicated and
involved.

"Let's see now...Ann Droysen?...
Ann Droysen-—switchboard...yes, here it is...
She's dating Don Bronstein of
the photo department...Wait a minute——
that was the November listing.
Here's December--she's now dating
Murray Fisher regularly
and occasionally Benny Dunn...
Wait a minute, here's a
cross-file reference on Fisher...
'See Jean Parker."
Let's see...
Parker. ..Parker...'

48

Рі лувоу'з circulation was approaching a million copies a month and the mag:
increasingly aware of fulfilling the image that they had created.

ne's executives became

"I don't care if
you call me Mr. Lownes
when we're alone,
but when there are
other people around,
you're supposed
to call me baby!"

able interest and. daily guided tours were
conducted through the осе.

"Office party?
What office party?!
We're just taking

our afternoon

coffee break!!"

Above, left: Art Director Arthur Poul, Editor-Publisher Hefner, Monoging Editor Jock Kessie ond Associote Publisher A. C. Spectorsky get the
feel of their first narsoy conference toble in the new Ployboy Building — the old offices didn’! hove one. Center: Hefner and Eloine Reynolds
(he's the one on ће right) during Ploymote shooting in Playboy Studio. Right: Ploymotes moke frequent promotionol oppeoronces, os ot 1958
clothing convention — left to right, Ploymotes Lindo Vorgos (December 1957), Jonet Pilgrim (December 1955], liso Winters (December 1956).

49

Although rrAvsov is primarily concerned with urban interests and what might be termed indoor sports,
the broadening editorial concept of the magazine prompted. Editor-Publisher Hefner to introduce
features for the outdoor sportsman, too — like Playboy's Pigskin Preview.

"Smokey, we've been getting a lot of
letters from readers requesting more
articles on outdoor sports, so I've decided
to run an annual feature on football.
We'll play it up big,
with plenty of full-color
illustrations! I want it
to be the best football feature
ever published in a magazine...

complete, detailed, exhaustive...!

We'll photograph some
naked girls wearing
football helmets and..."

Pravrov had created a new concept in nude photography with its centerfold Playmate of the Month.
Hefner wanted girls who were not only beautiful, sexy and exciting, but also fresh, demure and
wholesome — qualities embodied in what came to be known as the look of “the girl next door.” But
finding all of these attributes in a single girl each month was no easy task.

"But how can you
say she isn't
"the girl next door'?!
It all depends
on the kind
of neighborhood
you live in!!"

band swing out at magazine's giant jazz spectacular. [Sahl passed along frequently posed question, “Where is jazz going?" ta Kenton,
who observed, "Well, from here we go to Cleveland . . ."] Right: 1 moke the supreme sacrifice by giving up pleasures of PLAYBOY world in
Chicago to circle globe far magazine, having to make do with comely Russian chicks such as these during my extended cartooning junket.

In addition to its Playmates, PLAYBOY published exclusive picture stories on some of the most beautiful
women of show business. Some were famous stars — like Anita Ekberg, Kim Novak and Sophia Loren,
others were unknown, but their appearance in PLAYBOY lifted them to fame and fortune — like the
remarkably endowed English actress, June Wilkinson, upon whom PLAYBOY's editors bestowed the title
“The Bosom,”

"But I do want to sign the Playboy photo release—really I do.
It's just that when you hold it over there, I can't reach it...
and when it's over here, I can't see it!"

Praysoy used its famous Playmates in a variety

of promotional ways. For example, the magazine

offered its readers a Lifetime Subscription for $150,

and if a Lifetime Sub was given as a Christmas gift,

the first issue was delivered to the lucky recipient, in "The sophisticated rabbit that Hefner had chosen
person, by a Playmate of the Month. as PLAYBOY's symbol became so popular that a
Playboy Products department was created to pro-
duce merchandise bearing the by-then-famous
trade-mark,

"Sure, sure, they buy the
Playboy cuff links,
and the Playboy ties,
and the Playboy cigarette lighters
and Playboy key chains,
but I don't know..."

"Mr. Johnson? I'm Herman Winters...
Lisa Winters' father. She's
the December Playmate of the Month.
She was supposed to deliver
the first issue of your Lifetime
Subscription to Playboy, but she
caught a bad cold yesterday and...I figured——
what the hell-——I work right around
the corner from you, so I might as well
drop it off and save her the trip and..."

52

One of rrAvzov's major editorial interests has always been jazz. In the summer of 1959, the publication

Ја la у] T p
produced the greatest jazz festival ever held anywhere in the world. All the giants of jazz were there —
Basie, Ellington, Kenton, Brubeck, Miles, Diz, Ella, Satchmo, Cannonball, J. J. and Kai...

"This cat offers me $500 to come out here
and blow for the opening night
of the Playboy Jazz Festival,

so I say, 'Look, man, I'm a musician.
I don't care about the bread...
all that matters to me is my music!
I got music on my mind...
music in my heart...
music in my blood!

I eat, sleep and breathe jazz!
...Апа if you think you're
going to get a guy
like that for a lousy $500,
you're crazy!!'"

In the fall of '59, rLaysoy launched its own nationally syndicated television show, Playboy's Penthouse.
The show had the swinging atmosphere of a late-evening party and featured performers like Tony
Bennett, Lenny Bruce, Ray Charles and Sammy Davis Jr. The host and m.c. was Hugh M. Hefner, who
displayed a natural flair and talent for show business.

eat p
/ 2

"Hi there and welcome to
'Wayboy's Penthouse'...
er...
welcome to
'Payboy's Wenthouse'...
uh...
welcome to
"Heyboy's...'"

Everyone connected with the publication is devoted
to Hefner and ptaysoy, and there isn't anything
any one of us wouldn't do for Hef if he asked. I,
myself, made one of the greatest sacrifices for the
magazine when I agreed to leave the glamor and ex-
ement of Chicago for a series of tiring and tedious
trips to various out-of-the-way, godforsaken parts of
the world

"I talked to Hef this morning on the
phone...I said, 'Look,' I said, 'I went all
the way to Africa to sketch a safari...

I spent a month in Spain drawing the

bullfights...then to Monaco for the

gambling and the Grand Prix...

I drive up here to Paris to sketch the
café scene...and now you tell me
that when I'm done, you want me to fly
down to the Riviera for the film
festival to draw Brigitte Bardot and
all the European starlets in their bikinis,
I'm tired of getting pushed around! '"

Praysoy has won many art awards
over the years and one of the most tal-
ented artists contributing regularly to its
pages is LeRoy Neiman, who did many
of the early PLAYBOY story illustrations,
created the “Man at His Leisure’ series
and is responsible for the delightful,
pixylike Femlins who brighten the Party

Jokes page.

"I'm sorry, LeRoy, but we can't publish
drawings of a girl wearing nothing but
black stockings and shoes on our jokes page——
it's too risqué, too suggestive, too sexy.

Better put some gloves on her."

Above, left: Host Hefner runs through the detoils of a scene for his syndicoted television show, Playboy's Penthouse, with the progrom's
floor monager. Center: Comedion Lenny Bruce kibitzes with o poir of beoutiful ploymotes, Eleonor Brodley (Februory 1959] and Joyce Nizzori
[December 1959), between tokes on the Playboy's Penthouse set. Right: Aided by o well-ploced pair of chompogne glosses, Junoesque June

Wilkinson grophicolly justifies her rarsor title "The Bosom

while toking on off-camera breother during Ployboy's Penthouse орреогопсе. 53

In December of 1959, to fulfill his increasing social obligations,
Helner left the small bedroom apartment behind his office and
moved to a sumptuous 40-room mansion near the lake on Chi-
cago's Near North Side. Despite its size, the Playboy Mansion
reflected an aura of warmth and intimacy.

"Mr. Hefner?
Yes, ma'am,

I'll take
your coat...
then you just

walk down this
hallway and through
the second archway
on your right...
then you walk
through the
sitting room——
it has a white
fur rug, so you'd
better take your
shoes off
before you go
through there...
then go down the stairs
and around the pool-—
ihe floor is a
little rough there,
so you'd better take
your stockings off before
you walk around the pool...
then you go through the
first doorway on your left,
which takes you through
the sun and steam rooms——
it's pretty warm there,
so you'd better take your dress off
before you go through there...
then through the second door
on your right and down the
fireman's pole into the Underwater Bar...then...'"

v2

Heiner was now in a position to live the life
his magazine cditorialized about. With its
paneled walls, lush carpeting and fur-
nishings, elaborate lighting and hi-fi, and
an endless supply of exotic foods and finc
liquors, the Playboy Mansion created an
atmosphere certain to melt the coldest of
female hearts.

"Jodie, did you tell the
chef I wanted a candlelight
dinner for two...?"

Vo нт

"And did you mix the martinis...
very dry?"

INE, вата

"Did you check the water
temperature in the pool

and turn on the waterfall?"
PARE, Барта

"Did you dim the lights

in the Underwater Bar

and put the mood music

on the stereo hi-fi?"

"Yes, sir...everything is ready.
And may I ask what

time we are to expect

ihe young lady?"

"Good God! I knew

I forgot sonething!!"

Always an advocate of physical fitness
and exercise, Hefner installed a luxuri-
ous tropical swimming pool in the Play-
boy Mansion, complete with a waterfall,
adjoining sun and steam rooms, and an
Underwater Dar that looked into the
pool through a giant picture window.

"I don't understand you-—you spend
$500,000 on a house, you spend
$100,000 on an indoor swimming pool,
and you're too cheap to
buy a few $10 bathing suits."

With the magazine well "Well, what the hell, you said you wanted
established, Hefner was to have good-looking young
forced to turn elsewhere for waitresses dressed in bunny costumes...!"

new challenge and excite-
ment. And so, early in 1960,
PLAYBOY introduced the
first of a chain of sophis-
ticated key clubs — taking
their personality from the
publication and featuring
the now-famous Playboy
Bunnies.

Above, left: The Playboy Monsion, o snug 40-room pad on Chicago's Neor North Side, offers Paveoy execs a chonce to fulfill pressing social
obligations. Center: Playmates frolic in front of waterfoll in the Ployboy Mansion's indoor pool. Right: Late-night parties ot the Mansion
are a constant port of PLAYBOY scene; host Hefner thoughtfully escorts bikinied guests in the general direction of pool, or Underwater
Bar, or steam bath. . . . Frankly, 1 don't know where the hell he's going. NEXT MONTH: ““THE CURRENT YEARS”

PLAYBOY

55

PLAYBOY PANEL

swer the question, I'd say singers do
have a function in jazz, but as Cannon-
ball says, it's more accurate to refer to
them as jazz-oriented singers.

RUSSELL: I agree that superior jazz singers
are rare, but I think it's possible —as in
the case of Sheila Jordan — for а good
vocal improviser t0 give you the same
experience you get from listening to
instrumental jazz. I mean a singer who
is musical enough to take a song and
make his or her own composition out
of it.

SCHULLER: It’s a difficult subject — jazz
singing. I don't think there ever were
any criteria for jazz singing. 1£ you look
at the few great jazz singers, you'll find
they made their own criteria, but those
criteria couldn't be valid for anybody
else, because they were too individual.
What Louis Armstrong and Bessie Smith
and Billie Holiday and Sarah Vaughan
especially the carly Sarah Vaughan —
did was so individual it couldn't be used
by anyone else.

There's another problem here, too. A
matter of economics. Singers with jazz
capacity are usually drawn toward the
big-money market that exists on the
periphery of jazz. Often it's simply a mat-
ter of survival, because it's economically
very difficult for a singer to survive
in jazz. So they move to the periphery
and their work becomes diluted. Tve
id this before, and I can't say it often
enough, that so many people are wor-
ried about the possible dilution of jazz
through third-stream music, but no one
seems to be concerned about the con-
stant, daily, minute-by-minute dilution

of jazz by the commercial elements in

our music industry.

PLAYBOY: As jazz composition, which is
making the singer's role more difficult,
becomes more and more important, is
there also a possibility —as composer
Bill Russo once suggested — that a time
may come when all jazz is notated with
no room left for the improviser? Or do
you expect improvisation to remain at
the core of jaz performance, whether
traditional or avant-garde?

GILLESPIE: _Improvi is the meat of
jazz. Rhythm is the bone. The jazz com-
poser's ideas have always come from the
instrumentalist. And a lot of the things
the composer hears the instrumentalist
play cannot be notated. I don't think
there'll ever be a situation in which all
of jazz will be written down with no
room for the individual improviser.
GLEASON: If Bill Russo has suggested that
a time may come when all jazz is notated
with no room left for the improviser, I
think he’s out of his mind. This is not
foreseeable. There will always be guys
playing jazz who can't read music. There
will always be guys playing jazz who
just want to improvise, and don't want

tion

(continued from page 38)

to read and yet who can read. And
there may be a great deal of jazz com-
posed in the future that will be played
and well played, and good jazz. But
it will not be exclusively compositi
jazz. Improvisation, and the quality
feeling of improvisation — or the
cation of improvisation—seem to me
to be characteristic of good jazz, and I
think always will be.

KENTON: Both composition and impro-
visation will continue to be important
to jazz. The problem today is that good
improvisers arc so rare. There arc many
people who can make sense out of their
improvisations, but very few people are
really saying anything.

SCHULLER: I do think it's possible to have
jazz which is totally notated, but T
would deplore the possibility of even-
tually eliminating improvisation from
27. Improvisation is the fundamental
vital element which makes jazz
different from other music. Taking im-
provisation away from jazz is almost
inconceivable.
RUSSELL: I don't th

nk the question takes
to account what is really happening
in terms of jazz composition. Notation
in the old sense is becoming less im-
portant. 1 think the jazz composer's role
will not necessarily be that of notating
the music, but of designing situations,
blueprinting them — and then leaving it
to the improviser to make the blue-
prints come alive. But this won't be
happening in terms of actual musical
notation as we've known it. As Dizzy
says, some ideas just can't be notated, I
now that Ornette Coleman thinks the
music of the future is going to be en-
tirely improviscd. I don't think that's
necessarily true either, but I think there
is a middle ground.

PLAYBOY: With avantgarde jazz becom-
ing more musically complex, and with
uz used increasingly as social protest,
has the music become too somber? Has
the fun gone out of jazz? Is there no
place left for the happy sound?
GLEASON: The fun hasn't gone out of jazz
for me, baby. And when it docs,
won't find me sitting around in
clubs or concerts listening to
the f

matter how much he may complain,
nor for Dizzy Gillespie, nor for anvbody
else who is really playing anything worth
listening to. The fun certainly hasn't
gone out of jazz for Duke Ellington or
even Louis Armstrong.

And what do you mean "the happy
sound"? The happy sound is still here.
Listen to Basic. Listen to Miles Davis
playing Stella by Starlight or Walkin’,
Happy sound? John Coltrane's My Fa-
vorite Things is a happy record, a be
tiful record. The happy sound is never

going to go out of jazz. Jazz expresses a
variety of emotions, all kinds of moods,
and not exclusively one emotion any
more than exclusively one style or one
rhythm section, or one anything else.
X don't think jazz has become too sol-
emn. I think some of it has become
boring, but I don't think all of it has.
KENTON: Yes, but so much of the jazz
heard today is full of negative emotions
and ugly feelings. 1, for one, wish the
happy sound would return. Its absence
js one of the things that have killed
jazz commercially. People don't want
to subject themselves to these terrible
experiences. After all, jazz shouldn't be
an education. It's a thing you should
enjoy. If you have to fight it, 1 don't
think the music’s any good.

BRUBECK: I think we ought to look at this
historically. To some extent, jazz was a
music of protest when it began. It ex-
pressed the feeling of Negroes that they
must achieve freedom. And at other
times in the history of jazz, the music
has again been used as a form of pro-
test. "That's the way it's being used by
some today. But jazz isn't only a music
of protest. It was and is also a music of
great joy. Let’s bring the joy back into
jazz. Jazz should express all the emotions
of all men.

GILLESPIE: It seems to me that the answer
is simple. Todays jazz, yesterday's jazz,
tomorrow's jazz — they all are based on
all of the component paris of human
experience. An artist can be comic and
al and still be just as serious about
his music as an artist who is always
somber or tragic. In any case, the mem-
bers of an audience seek out those artists
who fill their particular needs — whether
beauty, hilarious comedy, irony or
pathos. It’s always been that way. Fur-
thermore, moods change from day to
day, so that a listener may find one of
his needs being met by a particular artist.
one night and a quite different need
being fulfilled by a quite different artist
the next night.

RUSSELL: As Dizzy says, a satirist can be
very scrious about his music. And I find
a good deal of wit and satire in what's
called the “new thing” in jazz. It all
depends on what level your own wit is.
Some people who think the fun has
gone out of jazz simply don’t have the
capacity to appreciate a more profound
level of humor. Now, if jazz is becom-
ing an art music, you have to expect
it to search for deeper emotions and
meanings in all categories. To me, jazz
has never been more expressive on every
level than it is getting to be now, and
it certainly doesn’t lack wit.

MINGUS: Now look, when the world is

happy and there's something to be happy

about, I'll cut everybody playing happy.
But as it is now, TIl play what's hap-
pening. And anybody who wants to es-

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PLAYBOY

cape what's really going on and wants
to play happy, Uncle Tom music, is not
being honest. Fil tell you something
else. The old-timers didn't think
was just a happy music. 1 was discu
this with Henry "Red" Allen recently,
and he told me he doesn't play happi-
ness. He ys what he feels. So do I.
And Fm not all that happy.

SCHULLER: How can anyone expec this
music to be happy, or any music to be
entirely happy, e ridiculously un-
happy times in which we live. 1 mean,
one has to manufacture one's own hap-
almost, And
the music cannot help but reflect the
time in which we live. Besides, as jazz
ages from an entertainment music
, it will lose a lot of
superficially happy quality it used
to have, because if you're entertain
your job is to make people happy. Some
пе sorry about this change, but

piness order to survive.

you just can't turn back the clock. 1 like
to listen to happy jazz. Sometimes, I hear
good Di d and I think, "Its trae.

That was а happy music. It was fun and
there weren't all these psychological
overtones and undertones.” But what
can you do about it? Many of the mu-
sicians in jazz today do not live in this
kind of happygolucky situ
don't live that way and they don't feel
that way-

MULLIGAN: Nonetheless, E do think those
who lament the passing of the "happy
sound" do ha legitimate complaint.
Playing music is fun. That's not to sa
that everythi, ily humorous.
But humor is not the only thing that’s

lacking these days. There are a lot of
guys who appear to take themselves 100
seriously. They're 100 deadly serious
about their music. It’s one thing to be
deeply involved in what you're doin

but it’s not necessary to have that u
rible striving feeling about art— with
capital letters. 1 find this very d re
T's as a result
ss that a lot of
fun goes out ol jazz.
PLAYBOY: de from
becoming too seriou

the

whether jazz is
s there also a tend-
з some expe
jus When Don Ellis for
appeared on am educational

ency toward Dadaism
mental

last year, each of his
musicians took a card at random from
a deck before the performance started
and that card helped determine the
shape of the music to come. Is the iu-
troduction of “the music of chance
some John Cage-like
uses of silence — indicative of the music
becoming so ana as to be и

municable? Have some jazz
ched the point where they
desire to communicate?

RUSSELL: Well, the last refuge of the un-
talented is the avant-garde. Yes, there
certainly are musicians who jump on

st

chic

ncom-
musicians

have no

ike a few cr
s who say, "Since
freedom, we can do anything
buck at it, too.” But
ids of the new jazz become
Xd more substantial, these peo-
ple will be weeded out. They can’t po
sibly survive.

the b;
There
there's

ad wagon —
musica

GILLESPIE: It all depends on who's doing
ally has something to say,
|.

it. If a man г
the devices themselves aren't impor
It's what comes out

MINGUS: Yes, anything can be used hoi
ing can be used di

у man is writing ог
playing, he's entitled to put a couple of
in there if thats the sound

n't new. Duke Elling-
ton has used playing cards to rip across
the [ s used clothespins
па he's had his trombonists usc toilet
plungers.
GLEASON: When you have es
minded musicians, you're goir
experimental music of
1 don't sce anything be
today that I've heard in person or on
records that can be described as Dada in
и pejorative sense, 1 don't think ¢
jazz musicians have reached the point
where they have no desire to communi-
arist that Tve
с

пета у
to have
And

cate. І don't think any
ever

he:

d of has reached that |
be that the terms they select i

to communicate, the vehicles
nd the devices that they
may, by de

tion, limit the potential auditors for
their communications. But they still
want to communicate.

KENTON: I don't know whether they don’t
пу desire to communicate or
whether they're just desperate for ideas
to such an extent that they're going to
try any sort of thing in order to gain
attention. | do think tl if this ми
is allowed to go on too long, it's going
to ruin the interest in jazz altogether.
SCHULLER: My concern with the sort of
thing you describe is that it takes away
d makes unnecessary most of the fu
damental artistic I don't
even mean specifi ical discipline:
I'm putting it on a broader, more fun:
damental level than tl 1 mean the old
challenge of a seemingly insurmountable
object which makes you rise above your
normal situation to overcome. In the
music of Jol Xd some of Stock-
hausen — and Don Ellis. in so lar
uses a similar approach — this critical
element which has been at the base of
art for centuries is eliminated. In fact,
some of them want to eliminate the
personality of the player. They want to
make music in which the Beethoven
concept of the creative individual is
totally eliminated and the music is insti
gated by someone, but not created by
him. They talk about finding pure
псе — which is really a mathematical

abstraction which cannot be found by
habitprone human be
uy to involve as much chance
sible in a given situation so
nate this question of the individual
personality. This to me is a radically now
way of looking at art. lt completely
overthrows any previous conceptions of
what art is, or has been, and at this
point, І stop short.

PLAYBOY: The experimentalists have at
tracted attention in one way. It has often
seemed, too, that for a jazz figure to
make it in a big way, he has had to have
a ly prominent personality
trait — droll like Dizzy, aggressively di
tant like Miles, aggressive like Mi
comical like Louis, etc. To what extent
has the “cult of personality" had too
great an influence on jazz
BRUBECK: Well, early in my care
zed that I ach the audience
with one th as musi
This is something it scems most groups
forgotten — that the primary re
son they are there is to ud
ence throu the music, And I was so
aware that ] could reach
that way I made it a
never speak over the microphone. This
lasted for years. We didn't dre:
way that was beyond the average busi-
1y hats
or goatees or beards or berets. In oth

y T real-

could re:

have

ness suit, and we didn't wear [u

words, we just let the music do what
the music should do — and that is get to
an audience.

Years later, I decided it would bc
permissible to announce a few tunes
and, as the years go by, I even be
funny once ile and it doesn't
bother me. Who knows? I may show up
sometime with а beard. But I think that
the main thing for a zz group to
remember is that if you'll stick to music,
you don’t have to get up and dance
around or thi reat chorus without
playi there and pla
have som to say and say it, and
forget all those other things.

GIEASON: | don’t think the cult of per-
sonality holds too great a sway over
mz. Dave has made it big
ce, and aside from

the world of
for

in jazz,
what he
cult of personality to Dave, you've got
o doesn't drink or smoke, who
icd to one won
or 94 years, and has
children, likes horses, and wants to stay
home in the county. 1 don't think
Dizzy is droll, by the way. [ think he is

a guy w

an lor over
houseful of

wildly hilarious. And 1 don't think
Miles is aggressively distant, either. And.
I don’t think Min aggressive. Aud
1 don't find Lou ‚ any more

than 1 find Miles agg
I think if yo
a comic your mind.
doing the man a great injustice.

(continued on page

ssively distant.
look at Loui

and

image in you'r

And
139)

(П

1906

[ШШ

all Siarg

\Ш ҮШ Denn

DIZZY GILLESPIE, trumpet

a look at the current jazz scene and the winners of the eighth annual playboy poll

DUKE ELLINGTON, leader P + GERRY MULLIGAN, baritone sax

PLAYBOY

RAY BROWN, bass J. J. JOHNSON, trombone

ELLA FITZGERALD, female. yocalist

ALTHOUGH THERE WAS A PROFUSION of new faces
in the 1963 jazz panorama, the pre-eminent
figure during the past усаг was the resplend-
ently resilient Duke Ellington. While main-
taining an arduous traveling schedule with his
band, Ellington also had an unusually full
composing agenda. In addition to writing ori
inals for his orchestra, Ellington. composed
and staged one of his most ambitious works,
My People, a history of the Negro in America
during the past hundred years (first performed.
in Chicago in August). Farlier in the summer,
Ellington's score for Timon of Athens had
been premiered during a performance of that
play at the Stratford. (Ontario) Shakespearean
Festival. Almost completed by the end of the
year was a new Ellington musical, Sugar City,
based obliquely on The Blue Angel.
Ellington also recorded prolifically under a
new contract with Reprise which gave him
complete frecdom in choice and direction of
material. While in Europe, for example, Duke
recorded several of his larger works with the
Hamburg Symphony, the Opera Orches-
tra, the Stockholm Symphony and the La Scala
Symphony. In this country, moreover, Elling-

THE 1964 PLAYBOY ALL-STARS’ ALL-STARS

MILT JACKSON, vibes

FRANK SINATRA, male vocalist STAN GETZ, tenor sax

3

PLAYBOY

OSCAR PETERSON, piano

FOUR FRESHMEN, vocal group BUDDY DeFRANCO, clarinet

ton proved, during a brief burst of free-lance
recording, that he could more than hold his
own with the younger jazz innovators as he
made one album with John Coltrane and an-
other with Charles Mingus and Max Roach.
Finis the year in a surge of grueling
activity, Ellington led his orchestra in Septem-
ber on a I4-week tour of the Near, Middle and
Far East. His was the only jazz unit to partici-
pate in a State Department odyssey for the
1963-64 diplomatic season. As was befitting a
visitor of Ellington’s stature, he had been
given an audicnce with Prime Minister Nehru
after conducting an amalgam of the India
Symphony Orchestra and his own band.
Ellington was also part of the civil rights
ferment which increasingly activated the jazz
world during the past year. At the Newport
Festival, Ellington introduced and declaimed
а new transmutation of Joshua Fit de Ваше
of Jericho. Yt began: "King fit the battle of
Alabam.” Among the verses were: “When the
dog saw the baby wasn't afraid/He turned to
his Uncle Bull and said/“The baby looks like
her don't give a damn/You sure we still in
Alabam? ” The first (continued on page 90)

JY ALL-STARS’ А

PHILLY JOE JONES, drums

SI ZENTNER
third trombone

JOHN COLTRANE

eer ICE BOB BROOKMEYER

fourth trombone
JOE MORELLO
GERRY MULLIGAN drums
baritone sax

RAY BROWN
bass

PETE FOUNTAIN
clarinet

LIONEL HAMPTON
vibes

CHARLIE BYRD
guitar

THE 1904 PLAYBOY ALL-STAR JAZZ BAND

HENRY MANCINI
leader

THE COMPLEAT city squire will,
of course, want to own a collec-
tion of LP exchings as diverse
as the moods he feels and the
life he leads The haunting,
y power of Billie Holi-
day provides the right lusty
note for an elbow-bending
hering of a stag clan, while
the artful strains of the Mod-
azz Quartet
ing of
- The sensuous back
ground sounds of Jackie Glea
son's orchestra or the hip
stylings of Frank Sinatra sug.
st the enchanted moods of
and the spirited strum-
of Leadbelly or Joan
Baez will quicken the pace of
y soiree. The classic symme-
y of Vivaldi offers the un-
hurried order of a bygone cra
for those moments when the
hurly-burly of today is too
much with us, while the fiery
romanticism of Brahms adds
another dimension to those
evenings when the gentle sex
very much with us. The
Editors of riaynoy offer no
“ratings” for the LP albums
isted below (100 cach of
classical, and рор /Iolk music).
We selected them simply be-
cause we like them; we think
you will, too.

POP/FOLK
DAVIO ALLEN, Sings the Music of
Jerome Kern. World Pacific M.

ERNESTINE ANOERSON,
Cargo. Mercury M

JOAN BAEZ, In Concert. Vanguard

Hot

M

MILOREO BAILEY, Her С;
Performances. a M,

HARRY BELAFONTE, 41 Carnegie
2 LPs

Hall. Victor M
Swing Dat На

TONY BENNETT, 41
нап. MS; тр,
1 Wanna Be Around, Columbia
Ms
1 Left My Heart in 5
MS

BIG BILL BROONZY, Last Session.
'erve M, 3 LP

ior MES

arnegie

Francisco.

OSCAR BROWN, JR.
Like It I! Columbia M

CAROUSEL, Orig. cast. Decca M-S.

Tells It

RAY CHARLES, The Genius Sings
the Blues Atlantic М
Rock & Roll Forever. Atlantic M
What'd Т Say. Atlantic M

JUNE CHRISTY, The Best of June
Christy. Capitol M-S
Something Coot. Capitol M-S

NAT KING COLE, Ваай of the
Day, Capitol M-S

Wild Is Love. Capitol M-S

Love Is the Thing. Capitol M-S

CHRIS CONNOR, He Lows Me,
He Loves Me Not. Atlantic M-S

МІС OAMONE, On the Swingin?
Side. Columbia М.
Linger Awhile, Capitol M-S

SAMMY DAVIS JR., 41 the Cocoa-
nul Grove, Reprise М 5

What Kind of Fool Лт I. Reprise
м5

BILLY ECKSTINE, Golden Hits.
Mercury M-S

ELLA FITZGERALD, Harold Arlen
Song Book. Verve M-S, 2 LPs
Cole Porter Song Book. Verve M,

ve M, 2 LPs
Ella Swings Lighily. Verve MS
Like Someone in Love. Verve M-S
Rodgers & Hart Song Book. Verve.
ALS, 2 LPs
Gershwin Song Book. Verve M-S,
5 LPs

FOUR FRESHMEN, The Best of
the Four Freshmen. Capitol MS

FUNNY FACE, Sound track. Verve
M

JUOY GARLAND, 4r
Hall. Capitol M-S, 2 LPs.

ERROLL GARNER, Other Voices.

Carnegie

GIGI, Sound track. MGM M-S

JOAO GILBERTO, Brazil's Brilliant
Јово Gilberto. Capitol MS

JACKIE GLEASON, Presents Music
Jor the Love Hours. Capitol M-S

Presents Music, Martinis, Memo-
ries. Capitol M-S

EYOIE GDRMÉ, Eydie in Love.
ABC Paramount №5

BUOOY GRECO, Buddy and Soul.
Epic M-S

HI-LO'S, Love Nest. Columbia 8

BILLIE HOLIOAY, Essential Billie
Holiday. Verve M

The Golden Years. Columbia M,
3 LPs

The Lody Sings. Decca M

LENA HORNE, Lena at the Sands.
Victor M-
Lena on the Blue Side. Victor M-S.

HOUSE OF FLOWERS, Original
сам. Columbia M

MAHALIA JACKSON, Great бе!
Up Morning. Columbia M.S
‘Newport, 1958. Columbia M-S

JOHNNY JANIS, Playboy Presents
Johnny Janis. (to be released) M-S

KINGSTON TRIO, Best of
Kingston Trio. Gapitol M-S

LAMBERT, HENORICKS & ROSS,
Sing a Song of Basie. ABC Para
mount А

STEVE LAWRENCE, People Will
Say We're in Love. United Artists
MS

HUODIE LEDBETTER, Leadbelly.
Capitol M

PEGGY LEE, Black Cofjee. Decca
M
Pretty Eyes. Capitol M-S

MICHEL LEGRAND, Castles in
Spain. Columbia M

the

JULIE LONOON, bound Mid-

night. Liberty N-S

JOHNNY MATHIS, Johnny's Great-
est Hits. Columbia MS
More Johnny's Greatest Hiis. Co-
bia M.S

Warm. Columbia M-$

CARMEN MCRAE, Lover Man. Co-
lumbia M-S

lu

MABEL MERCER, Sings Cole Por-
ter. Atlantic M

GLENN MILLER, Glenn
(ltd. edition). Victor M, 5 LPs

MY FAIR LADY, Original cast.

Miller

Columbia M-S
ANITA O'OAY, Anita Sings the
Most. Verve M

Traw' lin” Light. Verve M-S.

PAL JOEY, Vivienne Segal, Harold
Lang. Col M

PETER, PAUL & MARY, In thé
Wind. Warner Bros. M-S

ANORÉ PREVIN, Like Love. Co-
lumbia M.

JIMMY RUSHING, 5 Feet of Soul.
Colpix MS

JUAN SERRANO, Olé, la Mano.
Elektra M-S

RAVI SHANKAR, In
World Pacific М.5

NINA SIMONE, Forbidden Fruit.
Colpix М5
Nina nt Town Hall. Colpix М.

FRANK SINATRA, Jn
Small Hours. Capitol M
The Great Years. Capitol MUS, 3
LPs
Swing Along with Me. Reprise M-S
Swing Easy? Capitol M
Songs for Swingin’ Lovers.
DET

Concert.

the Wee

BESSIE SMITH, The Bessie Smith
Story. Columbia M, 4 LPs

KEELY SMITH, / Wish You Love.
Capitol M-S

STAPLE SINGERS,
Nails. Riverside М.5

BARBRA STREISANO, The Bar
bra Streisand Album. Columbia MS.

TOOTS THIELEMANS, The Ro-
mantic Sound of Toots Thielemans.
MGM м5

MEL TORNE, I's а Blue World.
Bethlehem M

Back in Town. Verve MS

1 Dig the Duke and 1 Dig the
Count. Verve M-S

SARAH VAUGHAN, At the Blue
Nole. Mercury M

After Hows, Rouleuc MS

OINAH WASHINGTON, — After
Hours with Miss "D^ Mercury M
WEST SIDE STORY, Original Cast.
Columbia M.S

JOSH WHITE, Spirituals & Blues.
Elektra M-S

ANOY WILLIAMS,

iling. Columbia M-S
JOE WILLIAMS, Everyday 4 Have
the Blues. Roulette M-S
Man Ain't Supposed to Cry.
Roulette MS

NANCY WILSON,
Lovers. Capitol M-S

Broadway My Way. Capitol MES

JIMMY WITHERSPOON |
Ben Webster), Roots. Reprise MS

Hammer &

Warm and

n

Hello Young

CANNONBALL AODERLEY, J: San
Francisco. Riverside

REO ALLEN, COUNT BASIE,
The Sound of Jazz. Cx

LOUIS ARMSTRONG, Young Louis
Armstrong. Riverside M

The Louis Armstrong Story. Co-

M, 4 LPs

Plays W. C. Handy. Columbia M

COUNT BASIE, And His Orches-
tra. Decca M

COUNT BASIE, BENNY 6000-
MAN, HOT LIPS PAGE, ETC.
ituals to у

SIONEY BECHET, The Fabulous
Sidney Bechet. Biuc Note M

BIX BEIDERBECKE, The
derbecke Story. Columbia М.

ART BLAKEY, Ari Blakey with
Thelonious Monk. Atlantic M-S

BOB BROOKMEYER, Jines [ot è
Cold. Verve M-S

OAVE BRUBECK, Jaz: al Ove

a selection of our one hundred favorite recordings in jazz, classical and pop [folk

67

P4 — CHARLIE BYRD, Rossa Nova Pelos
Passaros, Riverside M-S

CHARLIE CHRISTIAN, With Benny
Goodman Sextet. Columbia M

BUCK CLAYTON, Buck and Buddy
Blow the Blues. Prestige /Swingville
M

ORNETTE COLEMAN, Отене!

PLAYBO

Atlantic M-S.
JOHN COLTRANE, "Live" at the.
Village Vanguard. Impulse MS

EDDIE CONDON, JIMMY McPART-
LAND, ETC., Chicago Jazz. Decca М

MILES OAVIS, Birth of the Cool.
Capitol

Cookin’. Prestige M

Sketches of Spain. Columbia M-S

BUDDY DeFRANCO, TOMMY GU-
MINA, Kaleidoscope. Mercury MES

JOHNNY 00005,
Clarinet, Riverside M

ROY ELDRIDGE, Suingi
Town. Verve MS

DUKE ELLINGTON,
Best. Victor M
Iu а Mellotone. Victor M

New Orleans

on the

AL His Very

Hi-Fi Ellington Uptown. Colum-
bia M
DUKE ELLINGTON, CHARLES

MINGUS, MAX ROACH, Money Jun-
gle. United Artists M-S

BILL EVANS, JIM HALL, Under-
current. United Artists MS

GIL EVANS, Out of the Cool. Im-
раке M.S

MAYNARD FERGUSON, Messige
from Birdland. Roulette M-S

PETE FOUNTAIN, Swing Low,
Sweet Clarinet. Coral MS

ERROLL GARNER, Volumes 1 and
2. Savoy М

STAN GETZ, А! the Shrine. Verve
M, 2 LPs

STAN GETZ, J. J. JOHNSON, At
the Opera House, Verve MS

DIZZY GILLESPIE, Dizzy in Greece.
Verve М

DIZZY
PARKER,
Massey Hall. Fas

GILLESPIE, CHARLIE
BUD POWELL, Jazz at
asy M

DIZZY GILLESPIE,
Something New. Ph

ng Old
ips MS.

BENNY GOODMAN, Trio-Quarlet-
Quintet. Victor M

Carnegie Hall Jazz Concert. Co-
Tumbia M. 2 LPs

LIONEL HAMPTON, Swing Glas-
sies. Victor M

COLEMAN HAWKINS, Hawk Flies
High. Riverside M

COLEMAN HAWKINS, LOUIS.
ARMSTRONG, ETC., Guide to Jazz.
Vicor М

FLETCHER HENDERSON, Study
n Frustration. Columbia M, 4 LPs

WOODY HERMAN, Thundering
Herds. Columbia M-S, 3 LPs

EARL HINES, Solo Piano. Fan-
tasy M

AL HIRT, Our Man in New Or-
leans. Viewor MES

JOHNNY HODGES, DUKE EL-
LINGTON, Rack to Back. Verve M-S

AHMAD JAMAL, АИ of You. Argo
м5

J. J, JOHNSON, KAI WINDING,
68 Jay + Kai. Savoy М

JONAH JONES, with

Jonah. Capitol MS.

STAN KENTON, City of Glass.
Capitol M

Kenton i

LEE KONITZ,
Atlantic M

JOHN LEWIS, 2 Degrees East, 3
Degrees West. Pacific Jazz M

JIMMIE LUNCEFORD, And His
Orchestra. Decca M

HENRY MANCINI, The Blues and
the Beat. Vicor MS
Combo! Victor MS

SHELLY MANNE, 4nd His Friends
Play “My Fair Lady.” Contemporary
Ms

CHARLES MINGUS, Mingus Pre-
sents Mingus, Candid M-S
Tiajuana Moods. Vict

Jumpi

Hi-Fi itol M-S

Vista Warne Marsh.

"MS

MODERN JAZZ QUARTET,
Concert. Atlantic М-5, 2

The Comedy. Atlantic M-S

THELONIOUS MONK,

Comers. Riverside M-S
Thelonious Himself. Riverside M
Monk's Dream. Columbia M-S.

WES MONTGOMERY, Incredible
Guitar. Riverside М-5

JELLY ROLL MORTON, King of
New Orleans Jazz. Victor M

GERRY MULLIGAN, Presenting the
Mulligan Sextet, Mercury М.
Jeru. Columbia MES

KING OLIVER, King Oliver.
M

CHARLIE PARKER,
Charlie Parker. Savoy M. 2 LPs

Once There Was Bird.
Parker Records/MGM M

Immortal Charlie Parker.

Brilliant

1

Epic

Genius of

ie

oy M

ART PEPPER, Meets the Rhythm
Section, Contemporary M-S

OSCAR PETERSON, 4: St
Shakespearean Festival. Verve
Night Train. Verve M-S

ford
M

PLAYBOY JAZZ ALL-STARS, Vol-
ите Опе. Playboy M, 2 LPs

Volume Two. Playboy M. 2 LPs

Volume Three. Playbay М 5,3 LPs

BUO POWELL, The Amazing Bud
Powell. Blue Note M, 2 LPs

OJANGO REINHARDT, 7ле Best
of Django. Capitol M, 2 LPs

MAX ROACH, We Iusist.
5

Candid

SONNY ROLLINS, Saxophone Co-
lossus. Prestige M

Our Man in Jazz. Victor MS

GEORGE RUSSELL, Stratus Seek-
ers. Riverside MS

PEE WEE RUSSELL, Ji
union. Candid MS

Re-

GEORGE SHEARING, Sun Fran-
ciscu Scene. Capitol MS

HORACE SILVER, Six Pieces ој
+ Blue Note M

ZOOT SIMS, Zoot! Argo M.
STUFF SMITH, DIZZY GILLESPIE

y Gillespie
Verve M

ART TATUM, Piano Discoveries.
20th Century-Fox M, 2 LPs

CECIL TAYLOR, The World of

Cecil Taylor. Candid M-S

JACK TEAGARDEN, King of ihe
Blues Trombone. Epic M, З LPs

CLARK TERRY,
Candid M-S

LENNIE TRISTANO, Lennie Tris-
tano. Avantic М

THESAURUS OF CLASSIC JAZZ,
Columbia M, 4 LPs.

FATS WALLER, Handful of Keys.
Victor М

Color Changes.

BEN WEBSTER, Soulville. Verve M.

TEDDY WILSON, The Iupeccable
Mr. Wilson. Verve M

LESTER YOUNG, COUNT BASIE,
Memorial Album. Epic M, 2 LPs.

CLASSICAL.

VICTORIA DE LOS ANGELES, so-

BACH,

Brandenburg Concertos
cw York Sinfonietta,

u, cond. y of
ded Masterpieces, s
Goldberg Variations, Glenn Gould,
piano. Columbia M
St Matthew Passion. Elisabeth

Schwarzkopf (s), Christa Ludwig (ms).
Peter Pears (1). Nicolai Gi
Dietrich Fischer Dicskau (b), Walter
Berry (bs); Philharmonia Choir and.
Orchestra, Оцо Klemperer, cond.
Angel MS, 5 LPs
Ein musikalisches Opfer.
nbers of the
al Orchestra. Angel
Sonatas for Flute and Harpsichord;
Sonatas jor Flute aud Continuo;
Sonatas for Unaccompanied Flute.
Jean-Pierre Rampal, flute; Robert
VesronLacroix. harpsichord; Jean
Juchot. cello. Epic M-S, 2 LPs
Sonatas and Partitas for Unaceam-
panied Y
guard M,

Yehudi
ath Fes-

Dance Suit
bouw Orch
cond. Epic

Concerto Jor Pi
No. 1 and PROKOFIEV, Concerto [ur
Piano (Left Hand) and. Orchestra,

Кийон Serki

phony Orche
sell. cond. (n the Bar
Orchestra, Eugene.
the Prokofiev},

ndy, cond. (i
abia M-S

гїнєн! for Strings; Sonata
Jor Two Pianos end Percussion.
id Burgin, "Wohn; Bosio

ber Orchestra, Harold Farbe
n the Divertimento).
cerchian,
4 Press,
the Sonata). C

percussion (in.
bridge M-S

Jor Strings (complete).
ibi

M.S LPs.

BEETHOVEN, Concerios for Piano
«nd Orchesta (complete). Arw
Schnabel. piano: London Symphony
Orchestra, Sir Malcolm Sarge

cond, Philhar
chestr Dobrowen.
Nos. and 4).

cond. (m No.
oncesto for Violin and Orch

iestra.
cond. Columbia M
Strings: Op.
135; Grosse Fugue.
У bia MES,

LPs

Symphonies 1-9 (complete). Berlin
Philharmonic Orchestra. Herbert von.
cond. Deutsche Grammo-
phon М 5,8 LPs

BERG, Lyric Suite and WEBERN,
Five Mevements. Op. S; Six Haga-
teles, Op. 9. Juilliard Quartet. Victor
MS

BERLIOZ, отго el Juliette, Ор.

17 (complete. Rosal
Cesare Valleui (0)
(bs) Boston Symphony

Charles Mun

ћ, cond. Vic

BOISMORTIER, Concerto for Five
Flutes, Op. 15: No. 1, in G: N

{WA minor: No. S; in D and COR”
RETTE, Concerto comiques. Op. 8:
п C minor: No. 4. in

No.

Jean-Pierre Кај
Baron. Harold Bennett, Lois Schae-
fer. Paul Robison. flutes: Robert
Vesron-Lacroix, harpsichord: David
Sover, cello. Connoisseur Society 5.
12-in. 45-rpm.

BRAHMS, Goncerto for Violin and
Orchestra. in D, Op. 77. David Oist-
rakh, violin; French National Radio.
Orchestra perer.
Angel
Sonata jor Violin and Piano, No.

l. in G. Op. 78 and BEETHOVEN,
Sonata for Violin and. Piano, No. 8
n G. d 30. No. 3. Henryk 8л
tiur Rubinstein, piano, Vic-

tor N

Sonatas for Violin and Pian
А. Op. 100: No. 3. in D
Op. 108. Henryk Szeryng,
Artur Kubinseein, p

JULIAN BREAM CONSORT, 1и
Evening ој Elizabethan Music, Byrd.

No.

violin:
о. Victor NES

Pears (0),
Dieskan (b): High
; Bach Choir; Lon-
Чоп Symphony Orchest
Melos Ensem

MARIA CALLAS, soprano, Maria
Cullas Sings French Opera Arias. Or-
chestre National de la Kadiodiffu.
sion Francaise, Georges Prétre, cond.
Angel MS

_CANTELOUBE, Chants d' Auvergne.
а Паз

CARTER, Double Concerto jor
Harpsichord and Piano with Two
Chamber Orchestras and KIRCH-
NER, Concerto for Violin, Cello, Ten
Winds, and Percussion. Ralph Kirk-
patrick, harpsichord: Charles Rosen,

no: chamber orchestras, Gustav

Meier. cond. (in the Carter). Tosy
Spivakovsks, violin; Aldo Parisot
tello: insi wal group, Leon

Kirchner, cond.
Epic MS

ün the Kirchner),

PABLO CASALS, cello. 4 Concert
at the White House, With Alexand
Miecayslaw Hors
columbia M

CHERUBINI, Medea. Ма
soprano, et al La Scala Chorus
Orchestra, Tullio Serafin, cond. Mer
«шу

а Callas,
1

CHOPIN, Al Witold Mal
cuzyuski, piano. Angel M-S

irhas.

COWELL, Piano Music. Henry
Cowell, piano. Folkways M
DEBUSSY, Etudes. Charles Rosen,

jano. Epic М5

La Mer. Philharmonia Orchestra,
Carlo Мапа Giulini, cond.
M5

id TI. Walter
abia M.9 LPs

Preludes, Books 1
Giescking, piano. Со

(concluded an page 184)

МЕ "PE «КУТЧУ

ы

Pos K |
i == -— —

“OK, send in the stunt man!”

BIFFEN'S MILLIONS the problem was simple: all

jerry had to do was keep biff out of jail for a week,
just long enough to inherit his godfather's fortune

PART | of a new novel By P. 6. WODEHOUSE

THE SERGEANT OF POLICE who sat at his desk in
the dingy little Paris police station was calm,
stolid and ponderous, giving the impression of
being constructed of some form of suet. He
was what Roget in his Thesaurus would have
called “not casily stirred or moved mentally,”
in which respect he differed sharply from the
large young man standing facing him, whose
deportment resembled rather closely that of a
pea on a hot shovel. Jumpy was the word a
stylist would have used to describe Jerry Shoe-
smith at this moment, and a casual observer
might have supposed that he was a suspect un-
dergoing the French equivalent of the third
degree.

This, however, was not the case. The reason
for his agitation was a more prosaic one. He
had come on this last night of his Paris holiday
to notify the authorities that he had lost the
wallet containing the keys to the apartment
Jent to him for the duration of his visit. And
what was exercising him was the problem of
where, should the thing remain unfound, he
was going to sleep,

So far, though he had been in the sergeant's
presence for more than a minute, he had made
no progress in the direction of informing him
of his dilemma. ‘The sergeant, who on his entry
had been stamping official documents in the
rhythmical manner of a man operating the
trap drums, was still stamping official docu-
ments, appearing to have no outside interests.
It seemed a shame to interrupt him, but Jerry
felt it had to be done.

“Excuse me,” he said, or, rather, “Pardon,
monsieur" for he was speaking the language
of France as far as he could manage it.

The sergeant looked up. ЈЕ he was surprised
to hear a human voice when he had supposed
himself to be alone with his stamping, he gave
no sign of it. His was a face not equipped to
register emotion.

“Sir?”

“105 about my wallet. Гуе lost my wallet

“Next door. Office of the commissaire's secre-
тагу.”

"But I've just been there, and he told me to
come here.”

"Quite in order. You notify him, and then
you notify me."

“So if I notify him again, he will notify me
to notify you?"

“Precisely.”

“You mean 1 go to him ——*

“Just зо.”

“And he sends me to you?”

“Exactly.”

“And then you send me to him?”

"It is the official procedure in the case of lost.
property."

Jerry gulped, and what the sergeant would
have called a frisson, not that he ever had
them himself, passed through him, His spirits
sank to an even lower low. He perceived that
he was up against French red tape, compared
to which that of Great Britain and America is
only pinkish.

"What happens after you've sent me to him?
Docs he send me to Brigitte Bardot?"

The sergeant explained — patiently, for he
was a patient man — that Mademoiselle Bardot
had no connection with police work. Jerry
thanked him.

"Well, anyway," he said, “now that I have
your ear for a moment, may I repeat that I
have lost my wallet. It had my money and my
keys in it. Fortunately 1 was carrying my pass-
port and return ticket in the breast pocket of
my coat, or I should have lost those, too. And
Гуе got to be back in London tomorrow.”

“You are English?"

“Tam.”

“You speak French not so badly.”

“I picked it up here and there. I read a lot
of French.”

“I sce. Your accent leaves much to be de-
sired, but you make yourself understood. Pro-
ceed, if you please. Tell me of this wallet.”

“Well, it's a sort of combination wallet and
key case. It has compartments for money on
one side and clips to attach keys t0 on the
other. Very convenient. Unless, of course, you
lose the damn thing.”

“If you lose it, you lose everything.”

“You do,”

“Puts you in an awkward position.”

“You never spoke truer words. That is ex-
actly what it puts you in.”

The sergeant stamped some more papers,
but absently, as if his thoughts were elsewhere.

Finally, he spoke. “What was it made of, this
wallet?”

“Leather.”

"What kind of leather?"

"Crocodile."

"What color?"

"Maroon.

"How big?"

"About six inches long."

"Had it initials?”

“Are you going in to
see the sergeant?”
Jerry asked hoarsely.
“Рот do it.
That way
madness lies.”

PLAYBOY

72

. S. in gold letters.”

"It contained your keys?"

Jerry reminded him that that was the
whole point of these proceedings, and
the sergeant nodded understandingly.

“How many keys?”

“Two.”

“To what?”

“1 beg your pardon?"

“Of what doors were they the keys

“Oh, I see what you mean, The outer
and inner doors of my apartment.”

“You own an apartment in Paris?

“I'm sorry, 1 used the word ‘my’
loosely. It was lent me by my unde. He
keeps this apartment and runs over for
weekends.”

The sergeant so far forgot himself as
to whistle.

"Must be rich.”

“He is. He's a solicitor, and these legal
sharks always have plenty."

"Ihe sergeant stamped some more
papers. He had а wristy follow-through
which at any other moment Jerry would
have adi d.

"What size were these keys?"

"One was big, one was small."

"One big, one small" The sergeant
pursed his lips. “That's a bit vague,
isn't it? Could you describe them?”

“The little one was flat, and the big
one was round.”

"Round?"

"Well, sort of round. Like any other
key."
"Like any other key . . . That's not
much help, is it? Was the key bit of the
smaller key grooved?”

"I beg your pardon?"

"I asked you, was the key bit of the

smaller key grooved? That's clear
enough, isn’t it?”
“No.

“Itis not grooved?”

^] don't know."

The sergeant raised his eyebrows.

“Really, sirl I asked you was it
grooved, and you said no. Now you say
you don't know. We shall not get much
further at this rate."

"I didn't mean No, it's not grooved.
I meant No, it wasn't clear enough.”

“1 could scarcely have made it clearer,”
said the sergeant stiffly. “A key bit is
either grooved or it is not grooved."

"But I don't know what a key bit is.

"The sergeant drew his brcath in
sharply. He seemed incredulous.

"Yon don't know what a key bit is?"
He took a bunch of keys from his pocket.
"Look, see? "That's the key bit, the part
of the key which you insert in the key-
hole. Now can you tell me if yours is
grooved?”

“No.”

As far as his features would allow him
to, the sergeant registered satisfaction.

“Ahal” he said. "Now wc arc getting
somewhere. It is not grooved?”

“I don't know. You asked me if I

could tell you if my key bit is grooved,
and I’m telling you that I can't tell you.
For all I know, it may have been grooved
from birth. Look here,” said Jerry des-
perately, "is all this necessary?”

The sergeant frowned. He was an
equable man, but he could not help
feeling that his visitor was being a little
difficult.

""These things have to be done in an
orderly manner. We must have system.
But if you wish, we will leave the matter
of the keys for the moment. Now about
the money. How much was there in the
wallet?"

“I remember there was a mille
note and some odd change, call it two
hundred francs."

"So well say twelve hundred francs
and two keys, one large, the other
smaller, the latter with its key bit pos-
sibly grooved, possibly not. Does that
satisfy you as a description of the con-
tenes?”

“Yes.”
“And the wallet was made of leather?”
Nes
“Crocodile leather?"
“Yes.”
‘Maroon in color?”
“Yes.”
“In length six inches?”
“Yes.”
“With the initials G. S. in gold letters?"

“I have it here," said the sergeant,
opening a drawer. “I was thinking all
along that this might be it. The key bit
is grooved," he went on cutting short
Jerry's cry ol rapture. He emptied the
wallet of its contents, and counted the
money. “Twelve hundred and twenty
francs, not twelve hundred as stated."
He measured the wallet with a ruler,
and shook his head. "It's not six inches
in length, it's five and a half. Still, Pm
not the man to be finicky. I'll draw up
a report Tor you to sign," he said, taking
three sheets of paper, interleaving them.
between carbons and starting to write
with great care, rather like an obese
child working at its copybook. "Your
name?"

"Gerald Shoesmith."

“Gerald . . . that is your surname?”

"No, my Christian name."

"In that case you should say Zoo-
smeet, Gerald.”

"Can't I have my wallet and go? It's
late. I want to get to bed.”

“All in good time, sir Your home
address?"

“Why not?”

“Impossible. Suppose you made a
complaint that the sum was missing
when the property was returned to you?”

“L wouldn't dream of doing such a

have no means of knowing that.
We must be orderly.”
“And leisurely.”

“Sir?”

“Nothing. I was just thinkin,
to feel we're not in any hurry.
“T shall be here all night.
‘So shall I, apparently.” A long, shud-

dering groan escaped Jerry.

“I know what,” he said finally. “It's
just occurred to me. Lend me twenty
francs.”

“Out of my pocket?” cried the ser-
geant, aghast.

"You'll get it back with interest —
substantial interest, I may say. I'll write
you a receipt for two hundred francs,
and you can take that out of the wallet.
As a matter of fact, I'd bc quite willing
to make it a mille...”

His voice died away. The sergeant's
look had become stony.

"So you're trying to bribe me, are
you?"

“No, no, of course not. Just showing
my gratitude to you for doing me a
service.”

“When I'm on duty," said the ser
geant austerely, "I don't do services. I'm
in the service of the law.”

Silence fell once more, a wounded si-
lence on both sides of the desk. Pique
was rife, as was dudgeon, and the
entente cordiale found itself at its lowest
ebb, The sergeant began stamping papers
again in a marked manner, and Jerry,
raising his head, lit a sullen cigarette.
Then suddenly he uttered a cry which
caused the sergeant to hit his thumb in-
stead of the document.

“Гуе got it! Why didn't we think of
that before? Look! Follow me closely
here, because I believe I've found a
lormula acceptable to all parties. You
require twenty francs for the receipt
stamps for the written statement of the
loss. Correct? There are twelve hundred
and twenty francs in the wallet. Agreed?
Well, then, here's what you do. Change
the statement, making the amount of
money in that blasted wallet twelve hun-
dred, extract twenty francs, deposit them
in the national treasury, and everybody's
happy How's that for constructive
thinking?”

The sergeant sucked his thumb, which
seemed to be paining him. The umbrage
he had taken had subsided, but he was
plainly dubious.

"Change the statement? But it is al-
ready written, initialed and signed."

“Write a new one.”

“I have used up all my carbon paper.”

“Get some more."

"But would what you suggest be in
order?"

“Take a chance. Remember what the
fellow said — De Paudace, et encore de
l'audace, et toujours de l'audace.”

For some moments the sergeant con-
еа to waver. Then he rose.

I'll have to cover myself, first. I
couldn't do anything like that without
(continued on page $2)

JOE CHUTNEY AND SAM SIGNORELLI PLAY BLUES FOR OOGIE AND HAROLD / YANKEE-DOODLE
WE INSIST ON FREEDOM RIGHT NOW POSITIVELY / EINE KLEINE NACHTMUSIK
TAKE THE A TRAIN / TAKE THE B TRAIN AND TRANSFER AT TIMES SQUARE / KOOLABOOBOO / AAAARGHT
KONJY-SQUIMPFY / THEME MUSIC FROM FOX-MOVIETONE NEWS

hen | told Isdrees Johnson,
Wess A&R man for Round

Records, I was thinking of getting
Joe Chutney and Sam Signorelli to-
gether in the studio to “blow a few,”
he said, "Watch out they don't blow
a fuse!" We were at Slob's 857 Club
on East Third Street at the time, and
Joe and Fred and Al and Wild George
and the rest of the trio were gigging
for kicks around an original of Al's he
swore he composed in a dream on
the diatonic scale.

1 first met Joe when he was working
with Artie and eating regularly for the
first time "since Mama's left one went
dry." Even then he had that forthright,
chuffy tone that has since become his
trade-mark, asortof gargling-your-guts-
out quality that starts when it's ready
and stops when it's had enough. Later
he went with Woody and then Benny,
and even did a “stretch,” as he callsit,
with Johnny and Pretty Boy and Baby
Face and Machine Gun. “I learned a
lot from those ge'mmun,” he says, “but
my main influence was Lou Geh:

Sam Signorelli, for all his youthful appearance, has been
around the jazz beats for more years than a Garland arpeggio
has diminished sevenths. He started out as a band boy with
Cutes Hollander and His 87 Gentlemen of Jazz at the old
Alpine Village in Cleveland, scene of such musical firsts as
the saxophone and the bass flute.

In preparing for the session | spent a lot cf time with these
men just talking to them about their work. The most striking
thing 1 discovered was one I had suspected for some time,
thatin spite of many basic similarities in technique and execu-
tion, they are remarkably alike. “Whenever I blow," Joe ex-
plains, “I am basically and fundamentally trying to make e
sound." Similarly Sam: “What comes out of a horn is funda-
mentally and basically some noise," This reverence for the
“noise and sound” of music is what makes these two artists
so intensely “on the pot” with the listener and with each other.

What was less surprising were the many evidences I found
of these men's high regard for each other's work. When I told
Sam I wanted him to cut a set with Joe, he said, “You want
me to play with him?” He just couldn't get over it. When I told

Joe 1 wanted him to cut a set with Sam,
he said, “Sam who?" He just couldn't
believe it could be Sam Signorelli.

With the exception of A Train (Track
Five), the selections are by the artists
themselves, and most of them are
originals. Blues for Oogie and Harold,
an updated version of a tune Wild
George Smith wrote in 1927 for a
Downbeat songwriting contest, show-
cases the melodic delineations and
whimsical codas, the unique left-hand
signature of “‘double-stops” with the
“freight-train” right-hand attack, the
polyrhythms and élan, the crackling
profundity and ingratiating blah-de-blah
in the lower register eround the A and
E strings, the four-bar exchanges and
chordal building process, the explora-
tive two-part counterpoint and block-
pattern stentorian statements, the
dissonant fills and fugal riffs, the light
chording and occasional melodic coun-
terfigures filling the chinks with en-
firing subordinate second lines, the
marvelously oblique, lazy-seeming
warmth end lyricism of the big, full,
singing tone and lyric drive, end the assertive masculine
message of Wild George at his swingin' best.

“Crabs” Collier and *'Crotch'' Hoopoe hammer out gorgeous
metals of sound in Konjy-Squimpfy, a fine old stomp from the
pre-K.C. era. "Slam" Farlow and “Christ! Mitchell reach
back into authentic folk sources for Yankee-Doodle, which also
features the so-fine three-quarter bolero sousaphone *'doodl-
ings” and ritornello passacaglia of Fats “Fingers” Fingers and
John “Nance” Garner who doubles on lyre.

Dig, too, the funky tags, full of the old poetry, which wear
like Harris tweed, not facilely extrovertish, but with a warm
ensemble sound that literally falters to a conclusion.

Between takes, one of the technicians was asked what
he thought of the proceedings out there on the studio floor.
His reply: “When I throw a switch and gesture with my right
hand—like this—l expect those guys out there to start
playing all at the same time!”

1 guess that's how we all feel about this great aggregation
of fine musicians.

—James Ransom

This Round record ia the result of the most modern recording techniques in the industry. It was recorded monaurally,
atereophonically and haphazardly in the boiler room of the Brill Building, en war obtained from bechives whosa drones
are tuned uniformly to honeyed tones. Best results may be obtained by playing this recording at room temperature,
after making certain that the tone arm ia equipped with some sort of needle. Listening pleasure moy be incressed

ROUND RECORDS

by ascertaining beforehand that the plug of vour player is connected to an electrical power source, and that the
switch of the volume knob is in the "On" position. To ensure perfect performance, the record should be kept

free of dust and finger marka; this can beet be accomplished by keeping the sealed polyethylene envelope unopened.

IF IT'S ROUND...IT'S A RECORD.

MES/60001

“Look natural ...!

TAKE PETER O'TOOLE, fresh from his smash suc-

Tn Bed cess in Lawrence of Arabia, and Richard

5 Burton, fresh from his smash success with Liz

With Taylor. Now put them on the bedroom set of

Becket with a fun-loving French actress named

Veronique Vendell during а between-scenes

‘Bec het break from both filming and Peter Glenville's

direction, and you get some of the wildest tom-

foolery a candid photographer ever snapped for

between scenes D to leave wild E ne

as hing AND we were prompted by the results to supply our

courtier, own captions to the carryings-on, with the re-

peter o'toole sulis you see here. Paramount's production of

and ricbard burton Becket is in the multimillion-dollar class, but

frolic with a He most movies of today, with big budget or

small (see The Nudest Jayne Mansfield in our

beguiling June 1963 issue, if you can still get one), it's
frencb gamine пог above actress-on-a-mattress theatrics.

-
©реререророрсрсрерсрерг —-
1. VERONIQUE: As long as my wardrobe
hasn't arrived, why don't we shoot
the European version first?

ерәереререререрсрареререререр

Weldclockoekockockoate сосвосђоејоејоеђоеђо!

4. O'TOOLE: Even so, do we have to 5. O'TOOLE: Somehow, I can't seem to gel into the proper mood.

film the American version first? VERONIQUE: Neither can 1. After ап,
this movie's not about an undercover agent!

— 257

8. O'TOOLE: What, no retakes? 9. BURTON: Will you two stop horsing around?! If we work the

DIRECTOR: We're behind schedule now! Тера move on relata atten meli locit ye ыы Ној
to the scene where Burton finds the two of you together. O'TOOLE: OK, ОК! Wait ll I gargle and get tuned ир...

Do you remember your lines?
VERONIQUE: I haven't had a chance lo show mine vet!

3. DIRECTOR: You sly little minz—
you've been sitting on your wardrobe!

VERONIQUE: Oh well, you can't blame a girl for trying.

2. DIRECTOR: Well, your make-up seems to be all right...
Hold on, what's this?

DIRECTOR: . . . OK, you two, that was fine. Cul! ...

6. DIRECTOR: All right, already, Т
I said, CUT! . . . Aw, come on, O' Toole .. . CUT!!!

we'll try the European version first!

a RET TO
10. DIRECTOR: Places now,
everubody. Do you
pit ч VERONIQUE: Mmmmmm . . -

11. BURTON: 000000...

have your notes?
O'TOOLE: Аааааћ...

DIRECTOR: Perfect! All right, roll "ет! This is a take!

77

4
eE A 2

16. O'TOOLE: Mister Burton just fell down!

17. DIRECTOR: Never mind, gel on with your big love scene!
O'TOOLE: Without а rehearsal?

VERONIQUE: So ad-lib a little!

20. DIRECTOR: We're running out of film! Cut!!

21. O'TOOLE: Mmmmrphg!
BURTON: Wait, I think I see
what the trouble is!

ГЇЇ just pry them apart
with my dagger ...

78

-

ц. BURTON: “All around the town... P”

uk
18. DIRECTOR: Fine performance . . . Cut! 19. DIRECTOR: Oh no, not again! Сш!!

22. O'TOOLE: Thanks, old man! I nearly suffocated! 23. O'TOOLE: And as for you, get rid of that bubble gum!

78

|
|
|
|
E

Tux FRENCH PENCHANT for twinitialed cineminxes
(Brigitte Bardot, Danielle Darrieux, Simone Signoret, et
al.) is beautifully personified in Veronique Vendell, the
young lady so strikingly pictured on these and the preced-
ing pages. According to a Paramount news release, “[she]
will have no lines” in the bedroom scene of Becket; we
infer they mean spoken lines; if not, their release
writer may need the services of an optometrist. Selected
for the part by the film's producer, Hal Wallis, Veronique,
daughter of a French biologist and his chemist wife, has
obviously come by her body chemistry naturally. A holder
of two degrees in philosophy from a Paris university, she
played the Julie Newmar role in the French version of
The Marriage-Go-Round, a role which called for her ap-
pearance onstage swathed in only a towel. In Becket, her
wardrobe is somewhat less. A creature of appealing para-
dox, she wishes to someday be a famous actress, enjoys dat-
ing robust men and is fond of swimming, yet on the other
hand she states that she dislikes being photographed
too much, indulging in gymnastics, and overly hot
weather. Who's going to break the news to Hollywood?

PHOTOGRAPHY BY POMPEO POSAR

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сродрсүәсрәсүрсүәсүәсүәсүәсүәсүәсүәсүәсүәсүәсүәсүәсүрсүәсүрсүзєүәсүәвүәсүзсүәсүәсүәсүгсүәсүзсүзсүрсүзсүәсүәсүәсүәсүәсүәсүзсүгсүәсү.

obrero dodo

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Бо а о са an а о оса а DAR са а со о YOY YOY HCH DAR а DR а DR DR, DAR RIA DR DR RIA а DAR а а а MOR

PLAYBOY

82

BIFFEN'S MILLIONS

official sanction. Excuse me,” he said,
and passed ponderously through the
door that led to the office of the secretary
of the commissaire.

The secretary was a fussy little man.
with glasses and a drooping mustache.
He looked up irritably as the door
opened, his petulance caused, no doubt,
by resentment at being interrupted while
talking to a as pretty as the one
seated before his desk. She had come in
a moment ago, a small, trim, alert girl
whose tiptilted nose, bright harel eyes
and brisk manner had made an immedi-
ate appeal to him.

"They made an immediate appeal to
the sergeant also, and the thought passed
through what may loosely be called his
mind that some people have all the luck.
Here was the secretary enjoying a cozy
chat with a delightful member of the
other sex, while all he, the sergeant,
drew was jumpy young men who were
unsound, if not definitely shaky, on key
bits. But remembering that he was here
on official business, he fought down his
self-pity.

"I'm sorry to trouble you," he said,
"but in the absence of the commissaire
I would like your ruling on an im-
portant point that has come up. The
gentleman you sent to me just now, the
onc who had lost his wallet."

“Ah yes, the English newspaper man
Gerald Zoosmeet.”

'oosmeet, Gerald,” said the sergeant,
scoring a point.

The girl, who had been attending to
her face, lowered the lipstick, interested.

"Zoosmeet? Did 1 hear you say Zoos-
еер”

“Yes, mademoiselle.”

“It can't be. There isn't such a name.”

“Pardon me, mademoiselle, Y have it
written down here, The gentleman gave
it to me in person. He spelled it for me.”

"The girl looked at the paper he held
out to her, and squeaked excitedly.

“Oh, Shoesmith."

“Precisely, mademoiselle. As 1 said.”

d Gerald at that. Well, ГП be
darned. 1 know a Jerry Shoesmith. Is this
one large? Solid bone structure? Lots of
firm Hesh?”

"Yes, mademoiselle, he is substantial."

“Reddish hair? Greenish eyes?”

“Yes, mademoiselle.”

“And rather a lamb?”

The sergeant weighed this, as if not
sure that he was justified in bestowing
the honorable tide of lamb on one who
knew practically nothing about key bits.
However, he stretched a point.

“The gentleman is careless in his
speech and apt to become excitable, but
otherwise he appears to be of a suffi-
ciently amiable disposition.”

“And you say he's a newspaperman. It

(continued from page 72)

must be the same. I met him on the boat
coming over from New York two years
ago. It turned out that he was a great
friend of my brother's, so of course we
fraternized. He was feeling a bit sorry for
himself at the time, because he had been
a New York correspondent on one of the
papers and they had fired him. Did he
say what he was doing now?”

“He describes himself as an editor.”

The secretary intervened, speaking
rather frostily. He was feeling that this
get-together was becoming too chatty, too
much like an Old World salon, and that
there was far too great a tendency on the
part of the speakers to leave him out of
the conversation.

“You were about to ask my advice, ser-
geant,” he said, and the sergeant got the
message. He did not blush, for his cheeks
were already ruddier than the cherry,
but he quivered a little like a suet pud-
ding in a high wind.

“Yes, sir. A problem has arisen. Do you
think that in the case of the loss of an
object containing money the cost of the
receipt stamps could be met from the
contents of the object itself?”

“Mr. Zoosmeet has no money in his
possession?”

“None, sir. The object—a wallet
(one), crocodile leather, color maroon,
five and a half inches in length — con-
tains all his assets.”

n that case, certainly.”

“May I change the sum in the written
statement so as to avoid any possible
future recriminations?”

"I see no objection.”

"And can you lend me two sheets of
carbon paper?"

“With pleasure.”

“Thank you."

“Hey, sarge,” said the girl, calling
after him as he started for the door,
"try to keep Zoosmeet there till I'm
through with this gentleman. 1 want a
word with him.”

"I will endeavor to do so, mademoi-
selle."

The sergeant lumbered off, and the
secretary turned to his visitor.

"Now, mademoiselle, might 1 have
your name?"

"Kay Christopher."

"Christopher, K, The K stands for?"

"Well, I suppose, if you delved into
it, you'd find it was short for Katherine,
but I've always been called Kay. Kay.
It's quite a usual name in America.

“You are American?”

Yes

"You have some form of employment
in Paris?"

"I work on the New York Herald
Tribune.”

"A most respectable paper. I read it
myself to improve my English. And what
have you lost?”

"My brother.”

The secretary blinked. He ha:
thinking more in terms of
poodles.

"He's been missing for two days. He
and I share an apartment, and two days
ago I noticed that he was not among
those present, so after waiting awhile
and not hearing a word from him 1
thought I'd better come to the police."

"Have you made inquiries at the hos-
pitals"

"Every one of them. "They haven't seen
him."

"The secretary was just about to men-
tion the morgue, but changed his mind.
“Two days, you say?”

"Nearly that. I leave for work early
and he sleeps late, so he may have been
in his room when I pulled out the day
before yesterday, but he certainly wasn't
there that night and he wasn't around
next morning. Thats when I felt I
ought to take steps of some kind. I'm
not really panicstricken, mind you, be-
cause he's been away from the nest be-
fore and always returned, but . . . well,
you know how it is, one gets a little
anxious when it comes to two days and
not a yip out of him."

"Quite understandable. Anxiety is in-
evitable. Well, I can assure you that the
police will do all that is within their
power. What is your brother's name?"

"Edmund Biffen Christopher. Sorry.
Christopher, Edmund Biffen.”

"Beefawn. An odd name. I do not
think I have heard it before."

"He was called that after a godfa-
ther."

"gast

"Fortunately everyone calls him Biff.”

“I see. And what is his age?”

“Twenty-nine. Thirty in a week or so.
Old enough to start behaving himself,
wouldn't you say?”

"And his profession?"

"He used to be a reporter in New
York until one day he suddenly decided
to come to Paris. He's writing a novel,
only he hasn't got far with it. He doesn't
scem able to satisfy his artistic self. He
keeps clutching his brow and muttering
"This damned thing needs dirtying up."
You know how it is when you're writing
a novel these days. If it isn’t the sort
of stuff small boys scribble on fences,
nobody will look at it.”

“Shall we say profession: novelist?”

"If you don't mind stretching the
facts a little."

"Could you give me some idea of his
personal appearance?"

Kay laughed. She had a very musical
laugh, the secretary thought,

"Oh, sure,” she said. “That's easy. He
looks like a dachshund.”

“Pardon?”

“Well, he does. Sharp, pointed fea-
tures. Animated manner, brown eyes,

(continued on page 151)

3j

f

“THE NIGHTWARÉ

fiction By PAT FRANK
for two years the enemy had been operating uranium mines in sinkiang; now, he learned, they were ready to strike

FOR THE THIRD CONSECUTIVE NIGHT Judy Quale was awakened by her husband's nightmare. He whimpered, twitched,
and rattled bits of sentences in Chinese, or maybe Korean. Suddenly his left hand lashed out, striking her thigh,
and she wriggled to safer territory. He switched to English and phrases tumbled over one another in senseless
bursts. “Time factor critical... nucs in Shanghai . . . they'll never get enough stuff out of Sinkiang . . . crazy for us
but not the way the Han thinks... only a trigger in the Gobi . . . if Melanie comes through . . . Melanie, Melanie,
just one more time, Melanie . . . for them six is enough... adds up... Q, E. D."

His body arched as if straining against bonds. Frightened, she shook his shoulder and he began to come
out of it, as he had on the two previous nights. He sat up, chest heaving, sweat shining on his forehead. He

PLAYBOY

s

blinked, took one deep breath, relaxed,
and said, Must've had another night-
mare.’

“A beaut. You whacked me on the leg.”

“I'm sorry, darling.” He said, “It’s al
most five, 1 might as well get up."

“Don't be silly. You need your sleep.
Four hours a night isn't enough and
that’s been your par for the past week.”

“Have to be at the shop early to
process the night's input and prevent any
increment of my second-priority backlog.
I'm briefing at Old State at ten.”

"Cal, I wish you'd stop talking Govern-
ment jargon and relearn English. You
spoke good English once. Remember? T
wish we were back in California and you
were a person again. 1 wish you weren't
a spook."

Calvin Quale, Ph.D., was Chief of the
Special Branch, China Division, Central
Intelligence Agency, a most sensitive and
responsible post for which he was
uniquely qualified. But in Washington,
and elsewhere, all CIA employees, from
directors to stenographers, are known as
“spooks,” if known at all. He inquired
plaintively, “Can't a spook be a person?"

“I'm not sure. For weeks you haven't
acted like a person, or anyway a hus-
band, at all. You've treated me like a
mealcooking robot that also cleans
house."

“I know you've had hell for a while,
but it'll all be over soon, one way or an-
other. Look. I'll serve you breakfast in
bed. Orange juice, fried eggs and bacon,
toast and coffee. How's that?”

“That's nice, but all I want is coffee.”

When he brought coffee, she tasted it
and, voice casual, said, “Tell me, dear,
who is Melanie?”

His hand jumped and coffee lapped
from cup's rim to saucer.

"Don't spill Just let me have the
truth. Such a pretty name, Melanie."

He was suddenly aware of her tense-
ness, anger, and real concern. It was al-
ways a question how much a man in his
position could tell a wife. "In this case,”
Cal said, “Melanie is the code name of a
project. And you have no right to know
it.” This was the truth, but not the whole
truth.

“Tell me, Cal, isn't a nuc a bomb?”

"A nuc is any kind of nuclear weapon,
A or H. It can be a bomb, a missile war
head, mine, torpedo, depth charge, even.
a bazooka shell. Why?"

What about thosc nucs in Shanghai?"
udy, you're impossible!”

He recalled the advice of a graying
G2 colonel in Seoul: "If you are cap-
tured, tell “em enough so you won't be
tortured, hecause if the bastards torture
you you're liable to spill everything no
matter how strong you think you are.
Never talk about future plans or opera-
tions, or anything that might cost a life.
Tell "em what they already know or can
guess, and that's all.”

“I guess I was dreaming about the first
Chinese nuclear test," he said.

“L read that the Chinese were develop-
ing a bomb, but 1 hadn't heard about
any test.”

“They haven't announced it, and nei-
ther have we, but they did have one. Five
months ago, in the middle of the Gobi
Desert. An air burst. At first we thought
the Russians were pulling a sneak test
of an antiaircraft weapon at their missile
site near the Aral Sea. Then we discov-
ered it was Chinese. Satisfied?”

“Satisfied.”

“Keep it within these four walls." He
was glad she hadn't pressed him on
Shanghai.

Under a shower was a good place to
think. In a shower you could even talk
10 yourself safely. He thought about Mel-
anie, which was not her name but the
code word used by Special Branch for
her operation. Her name was Mai Sin-
ling, and her profession was known to
only five living Americans. Her dossicr
was contained in two files, one in a vault
under the new CIA headquarters in Vir-
ginia, the other in a similar vault in a
shelter cavern hollowed out of a Colo-
tado mountain. The Melanie file could
be examined only by Calvin Quale or
his deputy, Al Boggs, and in the pres-
ence of a security officer. Project Melanie
was a state secret, and of course any leak
would mcan death for Mai Sin-ling. With
one exception, she was the most valuable
secret agent the United States possessed.

He had seen her once. She was not
exactly beautiful, only arresting, with a
body that moved like a leopard's. He had
been 18 at the time, and she 25 or so.
His father, then attached to the wartime
embassy in Chungking, had pointed her
out in the dining room of the diplo-
matic hostel and said, “See that girl? She's
the most brilliant female in China — and
that includes Madame. She'll be famous
someday, if she isn't killed first. Daughter
of a White Russian émigré and a Chinese
war lord turned Communist back in
1929. Three years at Vassar, another at
the Sorbonne, and a year in Moscow.
Married to one of Chiang’s mil
but —"

"But what, Dad?" Cal had said.

“As you see, she isn't with him.”

It was only then that Cal noticed she
was dining with an American officer, for
when you beheld Mai Sin-ling it was
difficult to see anyone else.

Many years later Cal learned that it
was during this period that Mai Sin-ling
volunteered to become a sleeper agent.
"China," the dossier quoted her as say-
ing, “is going to have a convulsion, and
after that a dreadful disease, and will be
isolated from the West. lt is necessary
that China keep some friends in America,
and that America have some friends in

China." Until September 1950, nothing
was heard from her. Then she communi
cated one single item of news — the Chi-

nese Communists planned to enter the
Korean War. She listed armies, corps and.
divisions, named the generals, described
date the

the cquipment, and gave the

Yalu River. In Wash
Tokyo her information was regarded as
incredible, and disregarded. Her in-
formation was never disregarded again.
lt was often startling and always ac-
curate.

Until 18 months ago her reports had
tome in shipments of hog brisdes, via
Hong Kong, or jade via Bangkok, a slow
procedure. Then Cal had arranged a radio
relay from Peking to Formosa especially
for Project Melanie. Mai Sin-ling paid a
small net of subagents, and she had a
trusted cutout, an exporter whose skill
in accumulating dollars and pounds gave
him special value to the regime. If the
radio net was blown she would not be
involved, unless a subordinate or the ex-
porter talked, but the use of radio was
always dangerous. lt was also necessary.
When a rocket can travel from continent
to continent in 24 minutes, vital intelli-
gence must travel at the speed of light.

He often wondered about her motives.
Resentment of the system that had de-
spoiled, exiled, and ruined her mother?
Hatred of her opportunistic father? Love
and respect for an American officer long
dead? Money? No, not money. Perhaps she
was an excitementandintrigue addict.
He had known a few. Perhaps she craved
power, either for herself or her present
lover. Maybe she was simply a spirited,
intelligent woman who had seen much
of the world, good and bad, understood
the difference, recognized the alternatives
in her own land, and at heart was an
idealist. This last theory was possible.
His best agents rarely worked for money,
power or thrills, but for ideals. The best
spies were patriots. Cal never doubted her
reliability, the excellence of her sources,
Or her absolute courage. Mai Sin-ling
was now the mistress of a personage in
the Peking regime, an official once the
favorite and confidant of Mao, and still
influential in the Central Committee.

It was almost seven when he left the
four-room, second-floor flat in George-
town. He drove his compact across the
Arlington Memorial Bridge and then
north on the highway to the stone-and-
grass monolith which everyone called
"the shop." When he reached his office
he called the Communications. Center
and a Marine guard, pistol bouncing at
his hip, brought a thin metal case,
locked, with the nights priority dis
patches for Special Branch, China.

The first decoded message was signed
“Melanie,” the answer to his urgent
(continued overleaf)

“Pm a very busy man, Miss Miller! Are you going to
rush into an affair with me or aren't you?”

PLAYBOY

86

queries. He flipped through five payes of
pink flimsy. Mai Sinding was taking a
chance, entrusting so long a message to
the monitored air. The Peking counter-
espionage organization would certainly
zero in on the CIA transmitter if this sort
of thing continued. He began to read,
and saw at once that she was justified.
She had taken a desperate risk to meet a
desperate situation. He read it through
once, and then again more carefully,
memorizing the key phrases exactly, for
of course the letter itself could not leave
the building. His analysis of Chinese in-
tentions had been correct, and details of
their operational plan were here spread
out before him in astonishing and night-
marish minutiac. That he was right
didn’t make him feel less ill.

He wished he had not hoarded his
ns while awaiting word from Mai
Sin-ling, for time was running out, He
should have been bold and unafraid of
ridicule. Impulsively he reached for the
phone and then withdrew his hand. His
superiors would be in shortly and as a
matter of course would see copies of the
Melanie dispatch as soon as they arrived.
To be certain of this, Cal called Com-
munications, and to be doubly certain he
typed a memo and hand-carried one copy
to the director's suite, another to the
deputy director's, and dropped the third
with the duty officer. Cal remembered
Pearl Harbor, and the fantastic communi-
ns foul-ups that had cost eight battle-
ships sunk or crippled, half the aircraft
in the Pacific theater, and lives by the
thousands.

When he returned to the office, Miss
Meade, his new secretary, one year out of
Bennington, was at her desk. "Traffic's
frightful today," she said. “Do you want
China in your map case?”

“They have maps in Old State,” Cal
He told himself that Miss Meade
was very young, and for some reason
frightened of him and he shouldn't be so
brusque with her. One day he would ex-
plain that for months he had been under
great strain, concentrating on the solu-
tion of an elusive and terrifying problem
8000 miles away.

“ОМ The Interdepartmental Commit-
tee called. They've changed rooms on
you. You're to brief in General Caudle's
office instead of Mr. Thompson's. Does
that mean anything?"

“Means Га better not be late and if the
їтайс'в bad I'd better get going. Good-
bye, Miss Meade. Maybe I'll be back this
afternoon, maybe not.” It meant more.
Usually, he gave his situation summary
on China in the office of Hal Thompson,
who was special assistant for Asian affairs.
General Caudle was the President's per
sonal military advisor, so the subject of
his presentation, "China's Nuclear Capa-
bility,” had aroused interest in higher
circles. In five minutes he nosed his car

into traffic crawling like a thick lethargic
snake, without visible head or tail, toward
Washington.

Whenever there was time, Cal stopped
for a moment to contemplate Old State, a
blowsy, sooty dowager of mixed architec
tural ancestry, part fake French baroque
and part genuine Victorian ugly, chaper-
oning the graceful and elegant White
House just across narrow West Executive
Avenue. He had special reasons. Once
Old State had been State, War and Navy.
After World War I it was given over to
the State Department alone. State moved
to far-larger quarters and Old State now
housed agencies of the executive office
of the President. In this building Cal's
father and grandfather had begun their
diplomatic careers. Neither had achieved.
ambassadorial rank, for both had bogged
down in China. It required a lifetime to
learn China, and men who learned were
too scerce to be rotated elsewhere. Cal
had been born in the embassy compound
in Peking, and he was traveling the
same path.

He entered Old State. The high ceil
ings, cool corridors and white, shuttered
outer doors of the comfortable office
ites gave him a warm, familiar feeling,
like returning to a family homestead, and
whenever he briefed his seniors here, its
atmosphere laid upon his shoulders a
mantle of confidence. He went directly
to the third-floor conference room of
General Caudle. He was early by four
minutes, and yet seven of the ten chairs
around the table's ellipse were already
filled, which was most unusual.

Candle, 2 tightly knit, trim-waisted
man smoking a thin cigar in a dark-briar
holder, lounged at one end. He wore a
checked Madras sports jacket. He didn't
look his 60-odd years and he didn't look
like the commander of an armored corps
that had split the Nazi armies in France
and driven on to the Rhine. He looked as
relaxed and unmilitary as a bascball fan
in his box at the stadium, watching in-
field practice before a game. "Morning,
Dr. Quale, the general said. "Hear
you've got something hot. Your boss just
called. He's on the way over. Are these
maps OK?"

"I here were two big maps on the board,
one of China, the other the world. The
word gets around, Cal thought. He said,
“ГЇ need some markers.”

“We've got them in all colors, in that
little box under the board.” Two more
men entered, the general looked at his
watch and said, "We might as well begin.”

No amenities, no introductions. Never
any time for courtesies, not in these days.
Nor were they necessary, Cal thought. He
had met only three or four of the men
around the table, but they all knew his
job and background, and he knew theirs.
This was not preciscly the top level of
Government, but it was the next rung
under. and the most impressive group he

had ever faced. The Undersecretary of
State was present, and the Deputy Secre-
tary of Defense, along with the Secretaries
of Air Force and Army, the Chief of Na-
val Operations, a member of the Atomic
Energy Comunission, Thompson, the Far
East expert, ánd Senator Clive, a thought-
ful member of the Foreign Relations
Committee who could be trusted with
secrets.

He stepped to the map wall and said,
“I was originally going to talk on China's
nuclear capability. I'm adding to the
topic. I'm including China's war plan. It
is called the One-Two-Three Plan. It can
be in effect at any moment. 1 believe it
is now under way.”

He wanted their undivided attention
at once. Looking down on the oval of
g faces and widened eyes, he saw
"This war will be triggered by
nucs, so I have to go into their nuclear
capability first. For two years the Chinese
have been operating uranium mines in
Sinkiang Province," He touched the spot
with his finger. “Just here. Low-grade ore.
"They've found better deposits in Tibet,
but they haven't been able to move
machinery into Tibet or get the stuff out,
so they've been using the Sinkiang ore
entirely. It goes by truck to the railhead
at Urumchi—here—and then to Lan-
chow. In the Yellow River Gorge near
Lanchow they have built the biggest
hydroelectric plant in Asia. To refine
uranium, convert it to plutonium, and
construct bombs you must have ample
water and almost unlimited power sup-
ply, and here they have both. That's how
we sniffed out the plants in the first
place. Four months ego they conducted
their first — and last — test explosion. In
the Gobi, here.”

Senator Clive stirred.
know this?”

“We were lucky. One of our people
just happened to sce it. Until we got his
report we and the AEC believed the
Russians had sneaked one off high in the
atmosphere near the Aral Sea. Identical
upper-air wind stream, you see."

"Right," said the AEC Commissioner.

"Why did it take so long to get this
report?" the Senator asked.

Cal smiled. “Our man was traveling by
camel at the time, and even after he
rcached his destination his communica-
tions weren't of the best." The agent was
a Kazak, hardy and brave, member of a
nomad people who wander the Asian
wastelands, crossing borders at will. In
addition to being a Kazak he was a nat-
uralized American, a graduate of a Los
Angeles high school and, like Cal, a
veteran of the Korean War. After Korea it
became apparent that Kazak-Americans
could be extraordinarily useful, if they
could be found. Giant machines in the
Pentagon, culling millions of personnel
records, had found a few. Indeed the

(continued on page 175)

“How do we

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catches her eye in his tou;
His natural-color wool whipcord trousers with extension waistband, brown-leather-

E Oakley's six-shooter tokes amicable oim and scores а direct hit on the nose of the discerning gentlemon on the left who wears o blue-

ond-tan checked wool three-button jacket with tan sueded leather elbow patches, Пор pockets ond deep conter vent, by Stanloy Blacker, $60. The

smiling guy in the middle is nattily ond naturally at ease in his tan Sponish cotton suede short jacket decoratively trimmed with brown leather patch
pockets, and featuring leather-piped brown knit collar, inverted back pleat, button side vents, quilted rayon lining and wooden buttons, by Cortefiel,
$35. The omused chop on the right is confident that he too will be held up for Annie's approval in his four-button-front, brown wool herringbone

jacket with brown suede shoulder yoke, belt and elbow patches, flap patch pockets and elegantly warm alpaca pile lining, by Robert Lewis, $40,

PLAYBOY

1964 PLAYBOY ALL-STARS continued from page 63)

Negro ever employed in the dancing
chorus for a major television series was
hired in September for the Jackie Glea-
son show on CBS. She was 24-year-old
Mercedes Ellington, granddaughter of
the Duke.

In another small but symbolic break-
through, the first Negro marching band
in a quarter of a century participated in
the climactic Mardigras parade in New
Orleans. Individual Negro jazzmen had
marched in the past, but in 1963 the
Eurcka Brass Band collectively cracked
the color line. Throughout the year,
jazz musicians—along with other per-
formers such as Dick Gregory, Sammy
Davis Jr, and Frank Sinatra— helped
raise money for civil rights groups.
Twice during the year, the ample lawn
of Jackie Robinson's Stamford, Con-
necticut, home was the site of particu-
larly prestigious jazz sessions for civil
rights which included Dizzy Gillespie,
Dave Brubeck, Cannonball Adderley,
Gerry Mulligan, Quincy Jones, and many
more. In Los Angeles, the NAACP used
Sunday jam sessions in the spring to
help recruit members. Civil rights con-
certs were held in San Francisco and Los
Angeles, among other cities; and in
August, jazz musicians were heavily in-
volved in a concert at Harlem's Apollo
Theater to support the March on Wash-
ington for Jobs and Freedom.

Some members of the jazz community
became directly involved in breaking
down barriers. In April, during the
height of the demonstrations in Bir-
mingham, Al Hibbler flew to that city
and helped lead a demonstration. In
Chicago, Dizzy Gillespie, in alliance with
the Human Rights Commission, showed
‘one barbershop the way to equality in
public accommodations. For his efforts,
Dizzy received an apology —and a hair-
cut. The same John Birks Gillespie ap-
peared during the summer on ABC-TV's
Youth Wants to Know, and as a further
sign of the jazz times, the student panel
asked him about civil rights as well as
jazz.

Earlier in the year, Dizzy, beguiled by
Mexico, had planned to become an ex-
patriate and to open a school of jazz in
that country. By years end, he had
changed his mind. "Not now,” he ex-
plained, "not after Birmingham. We're
on the march now, and before we're
through, we might change the color of
the White House.”

There was even a minor ground swell
in 1963 for the candidacy of Mr. Gilles-
pie himself. Dizzy Gillespie sweat shirts
and Dizzy Gillespie for President but-
tons began to appear, and San Francisco
Chronicle columnist Ralph J. Gleason led
the vanguard of the campaign. Mr. Glea-
son, who could become press secretary in

a Gillespie administration, reluctantly
conceded during the year that he wasn't
sure how many votes Dizzy could mus-
ter; but he added accurately that such a
campaign would be wittily illuminating,
since Mr. Gillespie is expert at poking
serious fun at the world.

Musically as well as politically, 1963
was a spirited year for Gillespie. Now
almost universally acknowledged as the
most prodigiously resourceful trumpeter
in jazz, Dizzy also headed one of the
best small units of his career, aided con-
siderably by the renascence of his prin-
cipal colleague, tenor saxophonist and
flutist James Moody.

‘This was also a brilliantly satisfying
12 months for Woody Herman, who ac-
celerated the formidable pace he had
started with his new big band in 1962.
By the fall of 1963, the young, charging
Herman herd was already booked
through September of 1964 and even
had 12 weeks set for 1965. Herman, how-
ever, had no illusions that his own big-
band success indicated a trend. Said the
pragmatic Mr. Herman to The New
York Times: “This is not something
that’s happening with the band business.
les just happening with us. This band
has a pulse and vibration that arc so
strong that I see people walk in to hear
us in a perfectly normal state and in
thirty minutes they're out of their
heads.” Herman has also emphasized that
he has no patience with the "ghost"
bands (the wraiths of the Dorsey and
Glenn Miller orchestras). “We're not
selling nostalgia," Herman informed
Ralph Gleason. “Were selling excite-
ment. We're alive now and I don't want
to live in the past."

Stan Kenton, never one to live in the
past, also fielded a young band in 1963,
and thc rcaction to his music on the
road indicated that Kenton still had a
charismatic appeal for many listeners.
However debatable Kenton's "innova-
tions" had been to critics and musicians,
the man himself remained a persistent
proselytizing force for jazz as he envi-
sioned it. There has always been a cult
of personality in jazz, and Kenton con-
tinued to be one of the most irrepress-
ible exemplars of that cult. As for the
other titan of big-band jazz Count
Basie rolled through the year like a
precision machine, Low on distinctive
soloists, the Basic band nonctheless con-
tinucd to projcct more concentrated
power than any of its rivals.

One of the relatively new names
which became more strikingly familiar
to the American jazz pul in 1963 was
that of Martial Solal. The 36-year-old,
Algerian-born, French pianist made his
American debut in May at New York's
Hickory House to a remarkably wide-

spread accompaniment of newspaper
and magazine publicity. Solal lived up
to his laudatory notices at the Newport
Festival and in an RCA-Victor album.
"The Frenchman was onc of thc most
technically proficient and inventive
pianists in all of jazz

One of the unmistakable high points
of the Newport. Jazz Festival in July was
the series of demonstrations of the art
of jazz tap dancing. It is a skill which
has become increasingly rare, but it is
still capable of an improvisatory fresh-
ness and subtlety comparable rhythmi-
cally with the best of jazz instrumental
playing. Among the dancing educators
were Honi Coles, Pete Nugent, Charlie
Atkins, Chuck Green, Charles Cook and
Ernest Brown. The nonpareil Baby
Laurence distilled the pleasures and sur-
prises of jazz tap dancing in an evening
performance with Duke Ellington's or-
chestra.

Jazz festivals were fewer in 1963 than
the year before. The three major events
began with Newport in July. Financially,
the Newport tourney was a success, at-
tracting more than 30,000; but signifi-
cantly, 11,000 more people attended the
three-day Newport Folk Festival held at
the end of the month, George Wein,
who promoted both, then decided to in-
clude an afternoon folk concert in an-
other of his projects, August's Ohio
Valley Jazz Festival in Cincinnati. The
stratagem didn't work that afternoon,
partly because of bad weather, but Wein
was correct in his basic assumption that
in terms of box office, folk music in 1963
was, on the whole, more economically
viable than jazz. The second annual
Ohio Valley Jazz Festival did well
enough (attendance: a little over 20,000)
to insure its continuance this year. The
final key festival — Monterey, California,
in September, broke several attendance
records with a total audience for all
concerts of 29,600. 5

"The reaction to the three festivals
from musicians and critics was mixed.
All three were orderly and were pro-
fcssionally staged. Attempts were made
to provide somewhat unconventional
juxtapositions of performers (as in the
case of Pee Wee Russell joining Thclon-
ious Monk at Newport). Yet there was
a sizable feeling that at none of the
three festivals had the programing been
sufficiently venturesome.

Aside from the narrowing jazz-festival
circuit, there were many more com-
plains than hosannas about work op-
portunities in might clubs during the
past year. The established units had no
economic problems. Some, in fact — the
Modern Jazz Quartet, Dave Brubeck
and Erroll Garner— either abandoned
the clubs entirely or returned only to a
select number very infrequently. Others
who remained largely in clubs — Dizzy

(continued on page 120)

fiction By JACK RAPHAEL 6055

Where дев й say in reud that a ре fas te te Pte?

“you're making me feel better every minute and the better | feel the closer you are to recovery,” the doctor said

BOOTH ADAMS, who looked nothing like Harry Belafonte but
thought he bore a striking resemblance to Whizzer White,
Associate Justice of the Supreme Court, crept into the room
stealthily with a black scowl on his face. He wore a daz-
zlingly white T shirt that had been washed in the institution
laundry with Fab, and his bare purplish forearms radiated
strength and oftentimes joy. Wound around his neck was
a long colored scarf, the kind worn by students at All Souls
College on a foggy day. The scar hung down below the
drawstring on his gray sweat pants.

"Good afternoon," Booth Adams said to the man who
was shaving in front of an oval basin with a shaver equipped
with floating heads. The accent was Oxfordian which Booth
had cultivated carefully, but to this he had added his own
sensual drawl, which he considered faintly Jamaican. The
man who was shaving did not answer him. "Good after-
noon,” Booth Adams repeated. The man still did not reply.

idn't you hear me?" Adams said.

The man who was now trying to snip off a long hair
on the rim of his car finally said, “1 heard you.” His name

was Dr. Alonzo Shreck.

"You could be polite enough to answer," Adams said.

"Where does it say in Freud that a psychiatrist has to
be polite?" Shreck, other than this statement, made no
gesture acknowledging Adams’ presence.

“At least you can stop shaving when I come in. You
can make believe you're in the presence of a human being
—even if it kills you."

"Lets not forget who we аге," said Shreck irritably.
"Remember you're a charity case here.”

“I know why I'm here. And I know why I'm a charity
case. Even if I'm a charity case you can be polir

Shreck turned off the motor. "Don't you realize where
we are, Adams? This institution is in the Deep South. Half
the patients here are bigots and the other half are trying
to be. Can't you understand my position? You're a Negro.
You ought to know what's going on. If the South can't de-
pend on Negroes to know what's going on, who the hell
can they depend on?" He said all this in wearied patience.

“You still could have said hello.” (continued on page 100)

A oo

On the town for a day, white-gloved Nancy Jo end sister Doris gambol in the park before o candlelight shrimp feast at Sovannch’s

Pirate's House restaurant. Besides seafood, Nancy Jo also enjoys Italian food and is justly proud of her striking resemblance ta Sophia Loren.

FROM THE HEART of the old Confederacy we recently received a pair of
candid snapshots and a few hopeful words, enticing enough for us ta
send a staffer to Savannah to meet Nancy Jo Hooper, the walnuthaired
20year-old wha was to become this February's Playmate. Hazcl-eyed

ancy Jo has lived all her life with her parents and younger sister in
the same Georgia town, so small that she asked us not to name it, be-
cause if six visitors arrived at once they'd cause a traffic jam. Now a
telephone-company employee, this Southern bell ringer previously
clerked in a drugstore, there heard PLAYBOY purchasers tell her she was
Playmate material herself. Discarding daydreams of discovery, she took
ve by sending us snapshots of herself, because, as she explained
! rred to me that no one from rLaynoy would
a belle with a ever find mc here on his own." Nancy Jo's flight to Chicago for test
shots marked her first airplane trip, and her first visit to any city be-
ides Savannah. nnered, soft-spoken and shy (“I really enjoy
alking alone in the park") well Jo olfers the sort of
attractions that could once more set armies marching through Georgia.
our february playmate She so enjoyed her Chicago trip that this erstwhile country lass an-
nounced she'd someday like to settle here, perhaps when she finds the
man in her life, who will be “understanding and sophisticated — but
possibly with a small-town background.” For a striking sample of rural

electrification, see gatefold.

Southern accent is

British cannon, used in the American Revolution ond coptui from Cornwallis ot Yarktown, gets a military inspection from Noncy Jo and
Doris. At right our shipshape Playmate tolls all hands on deck with an oncient moriner's bell which hangs in The Pirate's House restouront.

Мы?
am Artillery's
INGTON GUNS"

MT E 3 —
A compulsive telephoner, Nancy Jo finds it difficult passing а phone booth without making a coll. “Perhaps becouse I'm rother
E ye MES nes olet viget rise ocioso dro do motae Cr ES ER

Nancy Jo rests ofter a stroll down Sovannah Beach, where she is wont to toke long, barefoot wolks in the sond. Though not o
devoted sportswoman, Miss February says her recreotionol preferences are all oquotic: swimming, boating, water skiing, fishing.

PLAYMATE PHOTOGRAPH BY THE PLAYBOY STUDIO, OTHER PHOTOGRAPHS BY POMPEO POSAR

PLAYBOY'S PARTY JOKES

Our Unabashed Dictionary defines acule al-
coholic as an attractive drunk.

Then there was the young man who saved for
years to buy his mother a house, only to find
that the police department wouldn't let her
run it.

A new shop opened in the heart of the li
town, with no sign of any sort on its awn
door or window, the nearest thing to ider
cation being the large clock in the window. A
gentleman whose watch had stopped hap-
pened to be passing by, and he went inside
and asked if they would repair it.

“I'm sorry,” said the derk, “but this is not
a watchrepair shop. This is a branch of the
hospital in the next block. All we do here is
perform hemorrhoid operations.”

The man begged the clerk’s pardon and
started to leave, then turned with a puzzled
frown. “Then whats the significance of the
clock in the window?" he asked.

“Well,” said the clerk, “what elsc could we
put in the window?"

Sometimes when two's company, three's the
result,

The shy young man, wed three months, met
his doctor on the street and very unhappily
reported that — due to similar shyness on his
bride's part — theirs was still a marriage in
name ошу. “Your mistake,” the doctor ad-
vised after hearing the gloomy details of
repeated ineptitudes, “is in waiting until bed-
time to make advances. The thought of the
approaching moment creates tensions and im-
pairs any chance of success. What you must
do is take advantage of the very next time you
both are in the mood.” The young man
thanked the doctor and hurried home to tell
bride of the heartening advice he'd re-
ceived.

A week later, the doctor happened to meet
the man again, and noticed that he was now
smilingly self-possessed. "My advice worked,
I take i?" he inquired.

The young man grinned. “Perfectly. The
other night, we were having supper, and as 1
reached for the salt —so did she! Our hands
touched . lt was as if an electric current
ran through us. I leaped to my feet, swept
the dishes from the table, threw her down
upon it, and there and then consummated our
marriage!”

“That's wonderful, Im pleased to hear
things worked out so well.” said the doctor,
about to go on his way. The young man laid
d upon his arm.
here's just one hitch, though, doctor,"

he said, uncomfortably.
“What's that?" asked the medical man, puz-
пей by the other's sudden uneasiness,
"Well —" said the young man, "we can never
go back to The Four Seasons again . . ."

The pretty young thing came slamming into
her aparument after а blind date and an-
nounced to her roommate, "Boy, what a
character! 1 had to slap his face three times
this. evening!"

onmate inquired eagerly, “What did

E" muttered the girl “I slapped
him to see if he was awake!”

Our Unabashed Dictionary defines stoic as
de boid what brings de babies.

His last will and testament completed, the
old man in the oxygen tent fondly told his
son that all his wealth, stocks, bonds, bank ac
nis after the

Шу came.
, Dad," whispered the weeping son,
voice emotion-choked, "I can't tell you
how grateful ] am how unworthy I am
+ + « Is there... is there anything I can do
for you? Anything at all?"

“Well, Son,” came the feeble reply, "i'd
appreciate it very much if you took your foot
olf the oxygen hose.”

Heard a good one lately? Send it on a post card
to Party Jokes Editor, PLAYBOY, 232 E. Ohio St.,
Chicago, Ill. 60611, and earn $25 for each joke
used. In case of duplicates, payment is made
for first card received. Jokes cannot be returned.

Ы GALLERY ©

ET np © <

""There, now — do you see why ше ask the
public not to touch the paintings?"

PLAYBOY

100

Where dees ¿gay neud. (continued from page 91)

“Do you want me to lose face? If T
lose face, how can I help anybody? You
want me to help you, don't you?”

“I don't need help,” Booth Adams
seid.

"If you don't need help, why did half
the student body at the university шу to
destroy your manhood?" Dr. Shreck
began to wind his shaving cord.

“Because they were jealous of it.”

“You keep saying that,” Shreck said.
“l have no proof. How can you expect
me to treat you as a psychotic when I
have no proof? I'm a scientist, not a
witch doctor. You want voodoo, go back
to your people."

"I don't know why I stay here and
take your insults. I could cut out. Think
your fence could hold me?”

"So why don't you go?"

“Don't provoke me, buddy."

"You want me to tell you why you
don't go?"

"I'm warning you, Shreckl"

“You've got it in your
somebody. That's it, isn't it?”

Booth Adams laughed. "So why don't
you put me in solitary?"

"What do you think this is—a lousy
penitentiary?”

“But you know it’s going to happen.
I'm going to commit a crime.”

“A lunatic doesn’t commit a crime,”
Shreck said, emptying the bristles from
the shaver into the basin. “How can a
man who doesn’t know the difference
hetween right and wrong commit a
crime? A crime is a criminal act. Once
you've been committed you cannot com-
mit, don’t you understand that?” He
leaned against the oval washbasin. “The
crime rate in this institution is absolute
zero. I could get a commendation from
J. Edgar Hoover. Of all major crimes
committed in this country not one can
be traced to this institution. I run a
clean place." Shreck leveled a finger at
Adams who shrank back a little. "And.
if you think I'm going to let some idiot
deface this record because he thinks he's
normal, you're out of your mind."

Adams sniggered. "You want me to
tell you why you won't confine me?” he
said. "Because you think you know who
its going to be.”

Dr. Shreck turned on the tap and
began to wash the black bristles down
the drain. *I know who it's going to be,"
he said confidently. “Goddamnit, I'm
a psychiatrist. I know every twist and
turn of your diseased mind."

“But you're not sure, are you?" Adams
taunted.

"Granted. We live in a world of un-
certainty. But mine isa calculated guess.”

“But you're still guessing, aren't you,
Shreck?” Adams said, wiping the mois-
ture from his palms on his, scarf.

"When I guess, I do it with the help.

d to rape

of the scientific method.”

"Would you like to know who it is,
Shreck?" Booth Adams baited.

Shreck shrugged his shoulders. "I'm
as curious as the next man," he said,
trying to conceal his interest.

Adams planted his feet apart in the
center of thc room and with both fists
on his T shirt gathered up two imagi-
nary lapels in the manner of а parlia-
mentary debater. "Who am I going to
rape, Doctor? The folk singer? The ac-
tress? One of the nurses? Your wife?"

Shreck's eyes lit up. "You mean you
are seriously considering Selma?"

“I didn't say, Shreck.”

“You know, my boy, Selma would not
be a bad choice. She's still a very attrac-
tive woman, and she has absolutely no
prejudices in bed. Now mind you, I'm
not suggesting that you choose my wife,
but if it has to be anyone, she'd be the
last person in the world to consider it
an atrocity. Now, if you're serious, 1
could easily arrange to be away at a
conference . . .”

“A minute ago you told me you knew
who it was. Now you're talking like
you're not sure."

"Don't play games with me, Adams,
Shreck said angrily. "I know who it is,
but you won't worm it out of me.’

Adams chuckled brutishly. He even
bared his white even teeth. He often did
this on purpose. He felt that it gave Dr.
Shreck a fecling of security. “What the
hell, Shreck,” he said. “I know who it is.
If you tell me who you think it is, ГЇЇ
tell you if you're right”

Shreck glanced at him suspiciously.
"You think I trust you? As soon as I told
you, you'd double-cross me. You'd go
ahead and rape somebody else.”

“Now would I go and do a thing like
that?"

"You're damned right you would.
You'd do anything to discredit me.”

"How much you got riding on it?"
Booth Adams asked casually.

Shreck stiffened. "What are you talk-
ing about?” he said guardedly.

“Listen, I know that you and the staff
organized a pool.”

Shreck was outraged. “Omar told you
that, didn't he? 1 never did trust a male
nurse. He thought that by telling you
that, you'd change victims. He'll do
anything to win."

"How much did you bet?” Adams
pursued.

Shreck put on his surgeon's smock. He
turned the pockets inside out and began
combing through them with his fingers
for lint. "It's a small wager,” he said
matter-of factly. “I did it just to keep it
interesting." He glanced up at Adams.
“So what's the harm? My God, you were
going to do it anyway, weren't you? So
we had a small gentlemanly pool. Who

gets hurt?”

“J just hate to be used like that,"
Adams said righteously.

Shreck drew himself up. He shook his
smock under Booth Adams nose. "No
one accuses Alonzo J. Shreck of exploit-
ing his patients!”

Adams lowered his woolly head. "I'm
always being used,” he said moroscly.

Dr. Shreck lay down on the couch and.
covered himself with the smock He
closed his eyes. waited awhile and then
snapped, “Tell me why half the student
body at Ole Swanee tried to castrate
you?"

Adams sat down at Shreck's desk. He
began paring his nails with a letter
opener. “Because they thought I didn't
want to marry their sisters" he said
calmly.

“No,” said Shreck.

"Because I hated watermelon.”

"Wrong."

"Because I got an A in differential
calculus." Shreck shook his head. “Give
me a hint," said Adams.

“Because they believe in capital pun-
ishment," said Shreck.

"But 1 believe in capital punishment,
too,” Adams said.

“But I believe in capital punishment,
for whites, and they believe in capital
punishment for the advancement of
colored peoples," Shreck said, caressing
the long silken hairs on his chest.

“But it's a small difference,” Adams
objected. "We could have discussed it.
I was willing to join their bull sessions
and debate the issue like a college man.
I was willing to be persuaded. I was
ready to see their point of view. I had
an open mind on the subject.” He buried
his face on the desk blotter.

“How can you debate castration?"
Shreck said kindly. “In the whole his-
tory of controversy have you ever read of
a debate on the issue? Did Bruno debate
castration? Did Socrates? How about
Galileo? They only wanted to debate the
heliocentric theory of the universe by
not looking through his telescope."
Shreck shifted his position on the couch.

"I can debate anything" Adams
roared. “1 can even defend the white
man's position."

“That's easy," Shreck retorted. “Can
you defend the Negro's position?"

"I never tried."

"Why haven't you tried? Everyone else
has,”

Adams arose from the desk and began
walking around the room. “The Neg
needs no defense. He is God's experi-
ment. He is the litmus paper of the
human race. He is God's ink blot on the
tabula rasa. He is the only evidence of
God's imperfection. The Negro is the
white man's thumb suck. It gives him
security against the sovereign tyranny of
the father figure.”

(continued on page 173)

THE
MONEYGRABEERS

a world-wide quintet of gentlemen who tapped the till yet eluded the law

article By MURRAY TEIGH BLOOM

TIRING OF THINGS, 1 began collecting people. Mirror-image scoundrels, for example —
men who seemed to have had almost identical criminal careers in different centuries,
like Gaston B. Means in the 20th and Sam Felker in the 19th. From them it was only
a small hop to my present specialty — the successful, i.e, uncaught criminals.

‘The trouble with the really successful crook is that we don't hear about him. He
remains uncaught, untricd, his tale untold. For all his vibrant ego, no successful
criminal is likely to rush into print with a candid autobiography. Even Hollywood
cannot make it worth his while. "Crime," says the Motion Picture Production Code,
"shall never be presented in such a way as to throw sympathy with the crime as
against the law and justice, or to inspire others with a desire for imitation."

As a result, Sinatra and his Rover Boys in Ocean's 11 complete their great Las
Vegas caper, get the gambling-house money safely and then have to see it burn on
the garbage heap outside town. "The Code, of course. And poor Alec Guinness after
working out the marvelously detailed plot that brings him and the rest of the Laven-
der Hill Mob ten million in gold bars in London is allowed to get away with it only
briefly until a square type comes to the tropical paradise to bring him back to some
damp English gaol. That funny Code, again.

We enjoy such films, psychologists say, because we secretly identify with the clever
criminal. Even the most righteous of us get an inner joy, an atavistic pleasure when
the criminal outwits the law without employing violence. Here is our secret inner
vengeance for the unmerited traffic tickets, the officiousness of court attendants, the
momentary panic when Internal Revenue Service letters come out of season. In one
measure or another we are all lawbreakers and there is a universal secret bond of
sympathy for the criminals who dare outrageously. Let the moralists proclaim “Crime
Doesn't Pay.” Some of us know better. And if we didn't, the professional criminolo-
gists would tell us.

“Most of us," I was told by Donald E. J. Macnamara, Dean of the New York Insti-

tute of Criminology, “would concede that crime does pay.” Virgil W. Peterson, Oper
ating Director of our oldest anticrime group, the Chicago Crime Commission, is even
blunter: “There exists a substantial army of professional criminals who ply their
trade with regularity and get away with it. . . . It may be reassuring to repeat that
crime does not pay, but there is simple evidence to show that it pays far too well

for far too many people.”
This isn't a new idea, only recently accepted by our more sophisticated age. Back

101

PLAYBOY

in 1877, penologist Richard Dugdale was
warning that crime "does pay the experts
who commit crimes which are difficult to
detect or who can buy themselves off."

For my collection, 1 did not want any
known racketeers, any Tony Accardos,
whose immunity to arrest is not the
result of ingenuity but simply stems
from a sordid alliance between politics
and crime. Nor did I want the routine
burglar whose seeming immunity is
only statistical. Most police chiefs op-
erate on the assumption that when
they've nabbed a professional burglar
he's previously pulled about 16 success
ful jobs. Thus, the more hauls, the
more certain apprehension becomes.
Customs investigators believe that when
they pick up a professional smuggler
he's previously pulled off five or six
undetected jobs.

The men I searched for, through my
years of freelance writing on almost
every subject for almost every top maga-
zine, were those who operated outside
the tight little society of the underworld,
beyond the leveling of statistical norms;
and men who worked without the aid
of any weapons except their finely honed
wits. In short, true originals.

The five specimens I've chosen had
lower- or middle-class origins and not
one had the equivalent of a formal col-
lege education. (Does college inhibit true
criminal originality?) They include a
master smuggler, a blackmailer, a pair
of counterfeiters, and an embezzler. In
the lot are an Irish-American who oper-
ated in New York and now lives in
Florida; a Yugoslav who worked in
Milan and now lives in Vienna; a
naturalized American born in England
who worked all over; an Argentine who
lives in Switzerland, and a Londoner who
never left England. Their net gains
range from a modest total of $94,000 to
$2,000,000 a year, which is the current
net take of the Argentine.

The first item for my collection came
from an old police friend, John A.
Lyons, who had once been an inspector
in New York City’s police department.
At the time he gave me the lead on this
extraordinary criminal, Lyons was New
York State’s Commissioner of Correc-
tion.

“He was,” Lyons said, "а consummate
rogue and a real nervy son of a bitch.”
Lyons described him as having a small
lithe figure, sharp black eyes, a well-
tended mustache and the large nose of
а whoremaster. “He reminded me,”
Lyons said, “of the busy little man with
black silk socks you used to see on those
French post cards.”

I refrain from mentioning his true
name for quixotic reasons. There are
no legal restraints on libeling the dead,
but after he retired as the most suc-

102 cessful American blackmailer of the

century, my man worked out a life of
small good works and neighborliness in
the community in which he settled in
1939. It is an upper-middle-class suburb
not too far from where I live on the
north shore of Long Island.

I shall call him Smith, because his
real name was a simple Anglo-Saxon
one, too. Smith attended a lesser British
public school and served in World War
1. He stayed on in France to commence
his incredible career as a blackmailer in
1921, Until he retired in 1939 he
grossed more than $2,000,000, which
comes to about $71,000 a усаг. Operat-
ing expenses were heavy, but he man-
aged to live in the grand style in Palm
Beach, Cannes, Paris, London and Biar-
ritz. During those 18 affluent years he
was never arrested, put inside a jail or
even subjected to the minor indignity of
getting his name on a police blotter. The
police knew who he was, what he was
up to and how he worked, but they
could never put a finger on him. He
bribed no police, kept no shysters on re-
tainer, was no contributor to political
campaigns. He was easily one of the
most frustrating experiences ever en-
dured by law enforcement agencies.

His greatest coup took place in 1930.
It never reached the papers, the courts or
the district attorney. "The New York
police knew just enough about the
details to force them to sit by helplessly
while a prominent New York banker
and patron of the arts was mulcted of
$250,000 by Smith.

Like all of Smith's jobs, this one was
painstakingly researched, prepared and
rehearsed. Smith employed only a single
accomplice, a new one for each venture,
Invariably, she was a pretty 16-year-old
orphan with a valid birth certificate.
Smith made modest annual contribu-
tions to several asylums. He would then
invest an even larger sum in the inten-
sive one-year finishing-school education.
At the same time she would get an
extensive wardrobe and skillful make-up
so that she would look older—say 21
or 22. He had seduced the girl, of
course. Long before the orphan’s educa-
tion was completed, Smith had a com-
plete dossier on his victim-to-be — the
extent of his wealth, his previous in-
volvements with women, a good insight.
into his character and a detailed knowl-
edge of his vacation plans. Smith
favored shipboard romances. They
progressed faster.

In this case, the banker became
friendly with the young woman aboard
an ocean liner. By the time the pair
returned to New York at the end of
the summer, she was the older man's
mistress. In September, the girl tear-
fully told him her fiancé had learned of
the affair and threatened to break off
their engagement. "The sophisticated
banker immediately suspected a frame.

His lawyer talked to the girl and in-
vestigated her background. Smith had
created her new identity with great
care, and the lawyer could find nothing
incriminating. The girl suggested that
$50,000 would bring her fiancé around
to taking a broader view. The girl got
her $50,000. Then a month later came
the demand for another $100,000.

The victim and his lawyer went to
the police who quickly learned that
Smith was involved. Smith, always a step
ahead, played his best card.

One morning, the maid in the girl's
apartment and the desk clerk in her
hotel visited the banker at his office.
They told him they had signed affidavits
to the eflect that the affair had begun,
so far as they knew, on a certain date
that year. The date, according to a copy
of the girl's birth certificate which the
banker had received that morning, made
it clear to him that his casual liaison was
now, in the eyes ol the law, quite a
different matter. The girl had been
under 18 when the affair began which
meant, according to New York law, that
he had committed a felony—a second-
degree rape. As he visualized the head-
lines if the case came to trial, he knew
he was beaten. He called his lawyer,
asked him to pay whatever the black-
mailers wanted and asked the police to
forget the case. Eventually he paid
$250,000. The girl got $20,000 from
Smith. “Enough for a dowry,” he used
to say.

When he retired in 1939, Smith
bought a comfortable house in a suburb,
did considerable riding, cultivated roses
and was a generous contributor to com-
munity causes. He lived with a house-
keeper and a “niece.” I could not find
out if the niece had been one of the girls
he had used in any of his blackmailing
schemes. He died a few years ago and
the obituary in the local weekly was
unintentionally funny: it described
Smith as a man who had operated sev-
eral private schools abroad. In a sense,
he had, of course,

My next specimen is José Beraha
Zdravko — you couldn't invent such a
name. He is now 56. He is worth about
$2,000,000, lives in a grand apartment
in Vienna and is the controlling partner
of the leading earth-moving-equipment
importers of Austria. He is a good hus
band, a loving father and bitterly re-
sents the appellation of “criminal”
Indeed, he is called that only in the
British Commonwealth,

Beraha’s crime was an enormous one:
he went into competition with the
British government by putting out a
finer gold sovereign.

Та 1946, Beraha was a smalltime
Milancse trader, exporting milling ma-
chines and aluminumware to South

(continued overleaf)

. . . that someone's staring at you?”

103

PLAYBOY

104

America. Behind him lay several es-
capes from the Nazis who had over-
run his native Yugoslavia.

Currencies fluctuated wildly on the
black markets, the only ones that mat-
tered then. Setting out to master the
intricacies of foreign exchange, Вегаһа
came upon a curious fact: valued even
more than the hard American dollar
was a supposedly obsolete gold coin—
the British gold sovereign. Inflation-
ridden middle classes in Italy and else-
where wanted gold coins and most of
them wanted the British gold sovereign
above all. This coin, a little smaller
than a U.S. quarter, was last officially
issued by the British in 1917 when it
was worth a pound, $4.86, and contained
about a fourth of an ounce of gold. So
that even at the official world market
price of $35 an ounce, the gold sovereign
was really worth $8.75. But unofficially it
was selling for anywhere between $14
and $28 in local currencies.

When England went off the gold
standard in 1931 it became illegal to use
the sovereign in Great Britain. The coin
was no longer legal tender. To Beraha's
al that meant anyone could issue it.
le organized the business quickly.
Gold itself was no problem. Italy put no
hindrance on the import of gold or its
internal sale. Beraha had master dies of
the George V sovereign made by a Mila-
nese for $100. He leased a one-story build-
ing on the Via Andrea Doria for his mint
and hired a young engineer to run it.

The British mint got 1364 sovereigns
out of every kilo of gold (2.2 Ibs.) but
Beraha decided to do worse. "No, I
wanted mine to be a better product and
distinctively different in one way: my
coins would have more gold in them.”

Even after putting a pinch more gold
into each of his sovereigns, Beraha was
able to make a profit of 5700 on every
kilo, a little more than $5 on each coin.
Selling them was no problem. Inflation-
ridden Europe, India, North Africa and
Arabia were crying for gold sovereigns.

Beraha set up а system of agents to
distribute the coins. To get them into
lands which barred the import of gold,
he worked out a friendly arrangement
with several diplomatic couriers.

Early in 1951 Beraha decided to re-
tire. He wasn't greedy: he had earned
about $2,000,000 and he was attracting
much competition. But worse, the
premium on gold sovereigns was going
down steadily. And the British were
becoming too interested in his little
mint.

He moved his family to Lugano in
Switzerland in the spring of 1951. Five
months later, the British caught up with
him. It came in the form of a request
for exuadition by the accommodating
Italians who had raided Beraha's mi
The charge: counterfeiting.

Under the Swiss penal code, Beraha

could not be bailed out while he was
held for “investigation.” He spent seven
months inside. “The Swiss,” says Beraha
admiringly, “are very correct and quite
unbribable. I almost didn’t even think
of trying.”

“The case came up before the Swiss
Federal Tribunal in the summer of
1952. A unanimous decision was handed
down by the five judges. In effect they
said:

“The only question before us is
whether or not the British sovereign is
still legal tender. . . . From all the
evidence we have been shown, it is
obvious that the gold sovereign is not
legal tender in England."

Accordingly, the court ruled that Be-
raha be released. "An insult to the
prestige of the sovereign," stormed the
Financial Times of London. "Now any-
one is free to manufacture sovereigns
and circulate them anywherel”

But Beraha had long tired of the
game. He made his pile and turned the
mint over to his associates in Milan.
The Berahas moved to Vienna in 1953
and have lived there ever since. He has
invested wisely in several most respect-
able businesses and lives a life of ease.
Only to the British is he still a dangerous
counterfeiter who ruined the prestige
of the gold sovereign.

“The crime of John Burns, as well
call him, was a dismally ordinary one:
embezzlement. And the fact that Mr.
Burns wzs not prosecuted even after
he was found out is also a commonplace.
Insurance companies estimate that about
a billion dollars a year is stolen by
trusted employees who have access to
company money. Professor Jerome Hall
of Indiana University believes that 98
percent of all detected U.S. embezzle-
ment cases are handled without public
prosecution. The victimized companies
are primarily interested in getting back
as much of the stolen money as pos-
sible rather than jailing the crook.

I added Burns to my collection be-
cause he was not a particularly trusted
employee and officially had nothing to
do with his employer's money. For most.
of his adult life, Burns worked for a
large department store. Yet I must be
coy here, because the store's conduct
afterward was hard by the ominous legal
shadowland known as "compounding a
fclony."

Burns stole $181,000. He was never
tried, arrested or even mentioned in the
newspapers. He did it by making him-
self a silent partner of the big store.
There were then about 3500 employees
and some 6000 stockholders, but our
Burns was the only partner, an enviable
relationship for an obscure maintenance
man making $62 a week.

He had a small cubicle where he kept
maintenance supplies for his floor in

the store. One day, while repairing a
hole in the ceiling of his little room, he
found that the hole made it possible for
him to reach a pneumatic tube. He knew
this tube led from several sales depart-
ments to a central change office. Sales
clerks would put the payment plus the
sales slip in a pneumatic cartridge, put
it into the tube and wait for the change
to be returned with the slip.

Burns got the same idea some of you
just did as I tell this. Locking the door
of the supply room, he built a little
stovepipe extension onto the pneumatic
tube so that the cartridges would pop
out with a whoosh right on the little
table in the supply room. Then he made
some rubber stamps to match those used
in the central change office. For an hour
every day he would lock himself in the
room and intercept the cartridges. If
the sales slip indicated that an §18 dress
had been purchased and a $20 bill was
endosed, he would simply take $2 out
of his change tray, stamp the sales slip
and put it back in the pneumatic tube
for return to the salesclerk.

The shortstopping went on undetected
for seven fat years, during which Burns
bought himself a $65,000 home. а good-
sized power cruiser, a fine car and in-
vested successfully in the long bull
market. The big store's auditors knew
there was a great cash leak somewhere
in the system, but their tightest inves-
tigation couldn't disclose the thief.
(Dozens of other thieving employees were
uncovered, but not the one they wanted.
In the retail field alone, internal thefts
are equal to half the total profits)

Then Burns decided to take his
family on a longplanned visit to the
Ould Sod. While he was away, a janitor
from another floor wandered into the
Burns supply room locking for a bottle
of window cleaner. He saw the added
tube and the change desk and called the
store's security department.

When the silent partner returned from
Ireland he was confronted. He admitted
nothing. His home, cruiser, investments?
Just lucky track winnings plus an Irish
Sweepstakes windfall— on which, he
pointed out, he had carefully paid his
income tax. The store's surety company
pemuaded him to make a deal They
knew it would be a particularly tough
case to prosecute, since he was never
caught in the act of shortstopping. He
paid back some $71,000 and was allowed
to keep his house and the $32,000 which
he was able to prove he made in the
stock market. Part of the agreement was.
that there was to be no publicity. There
wasn't.

(There are some righteous prosecu-
tors who think that such deals are
dangerously close to compounding a
felony. They are convinced that this
nonprosecution encourages cmbezzlers.)

(continued on page 171)

modern living

SOUNDS
Г

the latest in hi-fi
kits, components and
consoles for small
rooms to ball rooms

wis YEAR, as we focus in on the high-fidelity
IER we will be paying particular heed to
stereo apparatus in its natural habitat — to the
rigs in their digs. Budgetary considerations aside,
the size and shape of a man’s listening quarters
are likely to be the prime factors in his choice
of equipment. A pair of outsize, horn-loaded
speaker systems is going to look absurd and
sound cramped in the low-ceilinged confines of
an efficiency apartment (though it'd be great
for knocking a hole in an otherwise ironclad
. And a miniaturized, all-in-one tape player

cem decidedly muted within a loftily
baronial chamber. To cut a proper sonic swath,
equipment should be in tune with its surround-

For studio apartments, clockwise from noon: Secretoire console
with stereo tuner, three speoker systems, record chonger, by
Motorola, $904. Specker system featuring radial dispersion, by
Murray-Carson, $39.95. Caprice speaker system, by ADC, $49.50.
"88" Stereo Compact tope recorder with preamplifiers, by Viking,
$339.95. Tronsistorized AM and FM stereo receiver with 40-watt
amplifier, preamplifier, by Heath, $195 kit only). Stereo tope sys-
tem features automatically rewinding cartridges, by Revere, $399.
Turntoble with automatic intermix, by Gorrord, $54.50. Coffee Toble
Console, with stereo tuner, amplifier, speaker system, record
changer, by Magnavox, $259.50. FM stereo receiver with 36-wott
amplifier, preamplifier, by Eico, $209.95 (wired), $154.95 (kin).
Speaker systom, by Jensen, $29.75. Center, left to right: Stereo
phono system includes отрћћог, speakers, changer, by KLH, $259. FM
stereo receiver with 70-wott amplifier,preamplifier, by Scott, $399.95.

105

PLAYBOY

106

ings, Fortunately, the manufacturers of high-f-
delity gear have tailored their wares for a wide
variety of space availabilities, and there's now a
profusion of choice for just about every listening
situation.

We'll begin with the man in smallish quarters.
His range of sclection these days is appetizingly
wide. "Time was when the smallapartment
dweller had to settle for low fi unless he was
willing to turn over most of his lebensraum to
a multiplicity of electronic gear. Today the com-
bination of low ceilings and minimal footage
need cause no consternation. The makers of both
component and console outfits have trained their
sights on the problem of limited space, and a
number of admirable solutions are at hand.

A packaged system may seem particularly
appropriate for such locations. One of the best
we've seen is purveyed by a firm whose main line
of endeavor is actually in the component field:
the KLH Research and Development Corpora-
tion, of Cambridge, Massachusetts. Their Model
15 stereo system ($259) comprises three units —
two small speaker enclosures (8% high by 14”
wide) and a compact control center housing a
Garrard AT-6 automatic turntable and a solid-
state 15-watt amplifier. The latter is specifically
mated to the speakers, in that it introduces clec-
tronic compensations to offset the natural limi-
tations of small-cone transducers. KLH calls this
technique "frequency contouring," and it works
surprisingly well This outfit is just the thing
for compact bookshelf installation. Alternatively,
if the decor can accommodate an extra furniture
unit, we'd like to draw attention to two useful
consoles that serve extramusical functions. Mag-
navox' “Coffee Table Console" ($259.50, in wal-
nut finish) is a complete music system — including
stereo FM-AM radio—that doubles as a coffee
table. Its four speakers radiate sound from both
sides of the cabinet, thus accentuating the envel-
oping effect of stereo reproduction. Motorola's
Model DD40-T ($904, oiled walnut finish) comes
from this company’s Drexel Decorator series and
does extra duty as a bookcase. Stereo FM-AM
forms part of the basic package, and a 19” TV
receiver can be had as an optional extra.

Tape buffs in the market for an all-in-one
playback-record unit should look into Revere's
Stereo Tape Cartridge System ($399), now being
sold coast to coast after a year of regional test
marketing. The Revere plays palmesize tape
cartridges at a speed of 174 inches per second
—roughly 45 minutes of music per cartridge.
The operation is fully automatic, and since up
to 20 cartridges can be stacked in the changer
mechanism, 15 hours of attention-frce cntertain-
ment are theorctically at your command. A mod-
est assortment of recorded cartridges is available
(drawn from the Columbia, Command and
United Artists catalogs, and blank tape car-
tridges can also be purchased for home recording
— either off the air or from mikes supplied with
the equipment. Among integrated reel-to-reel
outfits there's а (text continued on page 110)

For moderate-size quarters, clockwise from noon: Morquis 3-speoker
system in oiled walnut with dual-level controls hos frequency range
that reaches as low as 40 cps and as high as 18,000 cps, by Electro-
Voice, $196. All-transistor FM stereo tuner, has “hideaway” door to
cover infrequently used controls, $299.95; matching transistor-integrated
70-watt stereo control amplifier employs computer-grade silicon out-
put transformers, also features hideaway door, $369.95, both by
Harman-Kardon. Trendsetter walnut-finish stereo secretary has 4-
speed automatic record changer, scratch-guard tone orm, AM/FM
stereo tuner with automatic signal when stereo broadcast is received,
separate calibrated controls, separate switch for automatic frequency
control, by Philco, $450. F-44 tape recorder plays and records 4-track
stereo and mono, Yz-track and full-trock mono, at two speeds (7/6 ips

ond 3% ips); features seporate erase, record ond playback heads, by Ampex, $595. Dual automatic turntable comes with dynomi-
cally balanced tone orm that tracks and tips at less than Ya gram, by United Audio, $94.75. Olympus speaker system in oiled walnut

features S7 linear Efficiency system, $645; shown above it, all-transistorized energizer has powerful 35 watts per channel, can be
matched to fit any JBL speoker system, $216, both by James B. Lansing. Low-silhouette turntable in oiled walnut with universal
tone arm and low dynamic mass pickup, by Weathers, $129.50. KN-4000 tape transport records and plays back at two speeds
(7% ips ond 3% ips), has sound-on-sound feature that allows recording of original with prerecorded sound; positive braking
prevents tape damage, $129.95; to be used with stereo record/ployback preomplifier, in front of it, $79.95, both by Knight. Tran-
sistorized receiver featuring 100-watt amplifier, stereo tuner that automatically switches from mono to stereo when station
broadcasts stereo, front-panel outlet for stereo headphones, by Bogen, $549.95. Stereo power amplifier (35 watts each channel),
factory wired and tested, $129.95; matching stereo preamplifier, $109.95 (wired), both by Dynaco. Contemporary walnut console
with 4-speed automatic record changer, dual-channel transistorized stereo amplifier, unique "record saver" that allows you to
remove records from jackets without making damaging finger marks, AM ond FM stereo tuner, by General Electric, $449.95.
FM multiplex tuner, with 11 tubes plus rectifier, interchannel hush, stereo indicator light, flywheel tuning, by Sherwood, $165.

For baronial pads, clockwise from noon: 800 Series silicon sclid-stote tape recorder records and plays back on 4-track stereo,

hos é-channel control center, 3-speed equalization, fully regulated dual positive and negative power supply, changeable head

assemblies with matched plug-in equalization, by Crown, $1175. FM stereo tuner with illuminated tuning meter, front-panel recorder
output jack, precision vernier tuning control, auto-sensor circuitry for fully automatic operation, mode control with FM mono, FM
stereo and FM stereo automatic positions, by Scott, $279.95. Symphony No. 1 speaker system, in walnut finish, consisting of two
12-inch woofers, one midrange speaker and four dual-range tweeters in vertical array connected through crossover network;
wide frequency response is 35 to 20,000 cps, by Bozok, $495. Carmel 2-way boss reflex speaker system in walnut finish has guor-
anteed frequency response of 30 to 22,000 cps, contains two new high-complionce bass speakers, sectoral horn driven by high-
frequency driver and 800-cycle dividing network, by Altec Lansing, $324. "00" tope recorder operates vertically or horizontally,
records and plays back 4-track stereo and mono; sound-on-sound triple head allows multiple sound-track recording; also features
hysteresis-synchronous drive motor, pause control, by Sony, $450. Stereo power amplifier with full 35 watts per channel, $264;
matching preamplifier, self-powered, $264, both by Marantz. Three-speed turntable in satin chrome with walnut base includes
108 playback arm, by Empire, $185. Royale 11 all-transistor stereo amplifier/preamplifier, with keyboard 25, 35 watts per channel,

by Altec Lansing, $366. Power stereo amplifier (bottom) delivers 40 watts per channel with maximum harmonic distortion of 0.6
percent from 13 to 30,000 cps, $319.50; matching solid-state preamplifier offers phono and tape equalizction, $319.50, both by
Hadley Laboratories. Combined turntable ond record changer plays records individually yet changes them automatically, hos 4
speeds plus variable-pitch tuning, built-in electric strobe, by Thorens, $250. FM stereo tuner in walnut cabinet fectures remote-
control transmitter; tuning can be accomplished manually on ће tuner's panel or via wireless remote-control unit, by Fisher,
$513.95. Professional tape recorder with accessory motors that allow mounting of two extra reels, giving you up to 10%” reel
capacity for long continuous playback or recording; also plays and records simultoneously, by Bell, $495. Cornwall speaker
system in oiled walnut has frequency range of 30 to 17,000 cps, by Klipsch, $408. Short-wave receiver with 5-band frequency coy-
ercge hos main tuning, separate electrical bond spread with logging scale controls, band selector, 4" PM speaker, loop-stick
antenna for low frequency and broadcast band, by Hallicrafters, $99.95. Danish modern lowboy console with solid-state amplifie
"vcri-grom" tone arm, professional record changer; also solid-state AM and FM stereo tuner, push-button function controls, by
Admiral, $799.95. Sibelius oiled-walnut console features all-transistor solid-state amplifier, AM and FM stereo tuner, pivotal
louvers at front ends of cabinet, custom record changer with 2-gram tone arm and “free-floating” cartridge, by Zenith, $i

PLAYBOY

wide choice. We've pictured the new Vi-
king 88 Stereo Compact (5339.95), a self-
contained suitcase unit that boasts an
abundance of handy features, including.
independent playback preamp circuits
that allow you to monitor from tape
while recording. Other compact reel-to-
reel machines well worth consideration
are the Sony Sterecorder 200 ($239.50),
the Tandberg Model 74 ($474, with
carrying case), and the Concord transis-
torized Model 880 ($399). It's worth not-
ing, incidentally, that the catalog of
recorded four-track tapes has now as-
sumed impressive proportions.

Components also figure prominently
in the spacesaving picture. Here the
focus of attention is the integrated FM
stereo receiver, which combines tuner
and control amplifier on one chassis.
“The Scott 340-B ($399.95) is a nifty-
looking example of the genre, with its
prepossessing array of control knobs and
indicators; its innards — including silve
plated RF circuitry, an “Auto-Sensor”
for automatic switching to stereo multi-
plex, and а 70wat amplifier — are
equally splendid in operation. Also
shown in our photo is the Еко 2536
($209.95 wired, $154.95 in kit form), a
36-watt FM stereo receiver which queis
a handsomely handy rotary tuning.
and an alltransistor FM-AM 40-watt.
stereo receiver by Heath (the AR-13,
$195, in kit form only) for its build-it-
yourself clientele. Other integrated re-
ceivers are purveyed by the Messrs.
Fisher, Bell, and Altec Lansing.

"To round out the compact component
setup, a record player and a pair of
smallish speakers are needed. For LP
handling in the bare minimum of space
you can't go wrong with Garrard's AT-6
($54.50, plus base), an automatic turn-
table of British manufacture that has
proved remarkably trouble-free since its
introduction a couple of years ago. Both
Pickering and Shure provide plugin
cartridges for the AT-6, and needless to
say they're carefully engineered to track
your microgrooves at the recommended
2-gram force. The choice of speakers
poses a thornier problem, since each
system has its own individual tonal char-
acteristics, and there's no accounting for
tastes. The only way to determine
whether a speaker really suits you is to
listen to it— preferably in your own
quarters. The three compact units
shown in our photo spread may not
provide the precise answer to your
needs, but they'll at least give an indi-
cation of the range of equipment avail-
able. Murray-Carson's “Cavity Generator
Spherical Sound System" ($39.95) is a
diminutive but resonantly full-sounding
reproducer that propagates sound in all
directions and can therefore be placed
just about anywhere in the listening
room. Jensen's X-11 ($29.75) is an ultra-

110 thin loud-speaker system of the open-

back doublet type, incorporating its own
ry volume control. ADC's
* ($49.50) is the smallest i
pany's new 300 Series of speakers,
a new line that utilizes so-called
“infrasonic-resonance” techniques to at-
tain optimum efficiency and damping.
‘Though the Caprice takes up more space
than the others, it’s still smaller than
most bookshelf speakers.

Before moving out of the diminutive
digs, we had better add a word about
headphones, since they're likely to be
needed here in the wee hours of the
morning. Actually, headphone listening
is great fun strictly on its own terms,
and you'll find that most new equip-
ment incorporates front-panel phone
jacks for ease of plugging in. Bearing in
mind the criterion of compactness, we'd
go for the Freeman SEP-100 Stereophones
($24.95), which pack a lot of performance
into a small, lightweight set. If your
carefully coifed female companion also
wants to get into the headphone act, it is
worth while to know that che SEP-100
can be worn under the chin as well as
over the head.

Let's move on now to larger lodgings.
Space isn't exactly to burn here, but
there's room for more diversified and
heftier apparatus — and consequently for
an overall upgrading of performance.

The electronics, for example, no
longer need be centralized or one chas-
sis. Instead, we can begin to consider the
more highly rated separate ЕМ tuners
and control amplifiers. Harman-Kardon
has recently introduced an extremely
attractive matched pair—the F-10001
tuner ($299.95), the A-l000T amplifier
($369.95) — and since they both embody
solid-state circuitry throughout, this is
an appropriate place for us to deal with
the tube-versustransistor question. To
contend that one is Out and the other
In would be foolishly premature.
According to most experts, tubes and
transistors each have their particular
strengths and limitations, and we have
yet to hear convincing arguments as to
either's inherent superiority. Some man-
ufacturers are still working exclusively
with vacuum tubes, though most seem to
be straddling the audio fence and pro-
ducing both types of equipment. The
general feeling in the industry would
seem to be that good sound is good
sound, no matter how it's derived.

To return to the Harman-Kardon
pair, their relatively uncluttered ap-
pearance is deceptive. Fach has a useful
array of controls neatly hidden away
behind a hinged flip-type panel. The
tuner features a D'Arsonval signal-
strength tuning meter and a circuit that
automatically switches over to multiplex
stereo; the amplifier boasts electrically
self-defeating tone controls and a trans-
formerless output of 35 watts per chan

nel. Comparable control capabilities and
performance ratings are provided by
such tube equipment as Sherwood's
Model $3000 FM stereo tuner ($165),
Dynaco's PAS-3/A preamp ($109.95) and
Stereo 70/A power amplifier ($129.95),
the latter two also available in kit form
at lower cost. However, there are a mul-
titude of other models just as deserving
of inclusion on your stereo shopping list.
‘The truth is that the electronic stages of
the high fidelity chain pose blessedly few
problems these days.

"The same can be said of the current
turntables, whether of the manual or au-
tomatic variety. In our display of delec-
tables, we've featured the Weathers K-66
Integrated Playback System ($129.50)
and the Dual 1009 Auto/Professional
($94.75) as particularly appropriate for
the medium-size rig. The svelte propor-
tions of the Weathers derive from a low-
mass platter and a miniature motor of
the type originally developed for timing
devices —an intriguing departure from
the “battleship” construction ordinarily
favored for record-playing gear. The AR
2Speed Turntable ($68) follows similar
design lines and has the added advan-
tage of a 45-rpm speed. United Audio's
Dual 1009 comes from Germany and is
the latest in a proliferating breed of
automatic turntables — devices that com-
bine the precision engineering of man-
ual turntables with the convenience of
automatic change. This one has a host of
valuable features, including an arm that
tracks effortlessly at М gram and a
four-speed motor with adjustment for
variable control of pitch through a six-
percent range. Altogether a splendid
piece of equipment to set beside the pre-
viously available Miracord and Garrard
A automatic turntables. In choosing a
cartridge for any of these playback sys-
tems, attention should be paid to a small
but significant detail: vertical tracking
angle. There is reason to believe that
considerable amounts of distortion can
be caused by a disparity between the
angle used to cut stereo records and the
angle of the stylus used to play them, A
strong move is now afoot to standardize
both angles at 15 degrees, and you might
as well get on the band wagon at the out-
set, for example with the new Shure
Series M44 I5-degree Dynetic Cartridge
($44.50 with .7-mil stylus, $49.50 with
-5-mil stylus).

For tape playback and recording, we've
given the nod to Ampex’ sleckly styled
F-44 (5595), a versatile and ruggedly
constructed deck that stands midway be-
tween this company's former consumer
models and its muchvaunted profes-
sional equipment. Like the latter, it em-
ploys a hysteresissynchronous motor,
utilizes three heads for erase-record-play,
and allows for sound-on-sound transfer
from Track A to Track B or vice versa.

(concluded overleaf)

WELL, CONGRATULATIONS, FoLKS?

SYMBOLIC SEX

more sprightly spoofings of the signs of our times

humor By DON ADDIS

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WELL, THATS SHow Biz
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| GONNA PIAY HARD To GET, ЕН 2

PLAYBOY

Also on display is the Knight KN-4000
tape transport ($129.95) which mates
with the KN-4002 record/play preamp
($79.95) to provide a four-track deck of
low cost and high performance. The
Benjamin Truvox PD-100 ($399.50) and
Ferrograph 424A ($595), both of British
manufacture, also merit close attention.

So far we've kept a fairly wary eye on
space, but in choosing speaker systems
for the roomier residence our profligate
instincts have gotten the upper hand.
There's a distinct trend these days back
to large enclosures, and we've taken ad-
vantage of that fact to show the Electro-
Voice Marquis 300 ($196) and the JBL
Olympus $7 ($645). The Marquis is
representative of a new breed of speaker
systems — heftier than the popular book-
shelf models but well shy of really mon-
strous dimensions. Other examples arc
the Fisher XP-10 ($249.50), the EMI
711-A ($249) and the Wharfedale W-90
($259.50). JBL’s Olympus hovers some-
where between the “middle range” and
“monster” categories, and — like all this
companys speaker systems—can be
powered by the Model SE402 Energizer
($216), a solid-state amplifier specifically
mated to the loud-speaker-enclosure com-
bination. Lest we gct too far out on our
large-speaker kick, we had better empha-
size that the acousticsuspension book-
shelf systems are far from passé. Indeed,
the AR-3 ($225) and KLH Model Four
($231) remain the preferred monitoring
speakers at recording sessions, and either
one will adorn any listening room.

In the matter of adornment there's a
good deal to be said, too, for several of
the intermediate-size consoles. We were
particularly taken with General Elec-
tric's “Contemporary” ($449.95) —a low-
slung piece of cabinetry that will blend
darlingly with contemporary Danish
decor. Its innards include a stereo
FM-AM tuner and a solid-state amplifier.
If you belong to the musicwhile-you-
work persuasion, take a look at Philco's
"Secretary" ($450), which packages the
full stereo regalia in a drop-leaf secretary.

Our grand finale is reserved for the
man in a mansion, We're assuming that
his listening room is a reasonable fac-
simile of Carnegie Hall and that he has
the wherewithal to fill it with whatever
he pleases. In short, spatial and financial
inhibitions are herewith discarded.
Unless he happens to go for the
Ampex Signature V ($30,000), 2 huge
console which incorporates the new
VR-1500 Closed Circuit Videotape Re-
corder for taping TV programs off the
air, our baronial plutocrat will probably
stick to component gear for the central
salon, reserving consoles for ancillary
use elsewhere, For example, he'd un-
doubtedly consider the Zenith “Sibelius”
($800) or Admiral "Kingshaven" ($799.95),

12 shown on pages 108-109 ideal for den,

bedroom, or other private sanctum. Both
models feature stereo FM-AM transistor-
ized amplification and turntable-quality
changers — perfect for providing suave
backdrops for serious nocturnal activity.

In amassing the constellation of com-
ponents for our space-unlimited layout,
we've stressed maximum flexibility and
optimum performance. This is all ne
plus ultra stuff. You don't really need it
any more than you need a Bentley Con-
tinental. But given the requisite space
and bank account, why settle for less? In
the tape category, for example, we've
shown the Crown 800 ($1175) —a strictly
professional product that can be
switched from 734 to 174 ips with no
detectable change in quality. The tran-
sistorized control center makes use
of gold-plated circuitry and employs
plugin epoxy panels for fully modular-
ized efficiency. Alternatively, considera
tion might go to the Bell RT-360 tape
recorder equipped with DK-l accessory
motors ($495). This outfit can be used
to copy tapes—a particularly welcome
function for the collector who likes to
swap rare taped performances with other
aficionados. Should portability be a de-
termining factor, we'd vote for the Sony
Sterecorder 600 ($450), a precision-made
Japanese machine which also boasts the
convenience of modular circuitry.

Our disc playback equipment is on
the same top level. The Empire 498
($185) has been engineered to withstand
any reasonable number of jars or bumps
during playback, thanks to an extremely
effective vibration-absorbing suspension
system, and its hysteresissynchronous
motor propels the turntable at the three
standard speeds. For automatic play,
we've chosen the Thorens TD-224 Mas-
terpiece ($250), which introduces a new
approach to changer design. Here the
records are stacked to the left of the
turntable and transferred back and forth
individually by a moving arm, climinat-
ing the problems caused by stacking discs
on a revolving platter. Other "Thorens.
features include an illuminated strobe,
variable pitch control and builtin
record-cleaning brush.

In the FM tuner category, we've pic-
tured the Scott 310E ($279.95) and
Fisher MF 320 ($513.95) — top-of-the-line
units embodying outstanding sensitivity
and channel-separation ratings. The
Fisher comes with a wireless remote-
control selector that effectuates auto-
matic tuning action and volume-level
setting from an easy chair by the mere
flick of a wrist. Both models employ
vacuum-tube circuitry. If you hanker
after solid state, be advised that compar-
able performers based on transistor de-
sign will soon be available from these
maufacturers — Scott's Model 4312 tran-
sistorized FM tuner at a $365 price tag,
and Fisher's Model TF-300 at $379.50.
For AM reception, FAA long-wave

weather casts, and the international
short-wave bands, we've chosen the skill-
fully styled Hallicrafters S-118 ($99.95).
Jt ranges from 185 kilocycles to 31 mega-
cycles and offers electrical band spread
and sliderule logging. The rearpanel
audio output jack facilitates plugging
into a high fidelity setup.

The tube-versus-transistor option is
present again in the amplification stage.
Altec's Royale П stereo preamp-amplifier
($366) is solidstate throughout. It de-
velops 35 watts per channel and features
a set of nine keyboard switches on the
front panel for controlling channel re-
verse, scratch filter, and the like. At
Marantz, tube circuitry is still in the
ascendant — аз evidenced by this com-
panys Model 7 preamp ($264) and
Model 8B power amplifier (also $264),
the latter delivering 35 watts per chan-
nel in normal operation or 18 ultraclean
watts in the optional triode operation.
"The designers at Hadley Laboratories in
California believe they have secured the
best of both worlds by offering solid-state
engineering in the preamplifier and
vacuum-tube engineering in the power
amplifier. Hadleys Model 621 preamp
(5319.50) has a rated frequency response
of 5 to 100,000 cycles, while the Model
601 amplifier (also $319.50) puts out 40
watts per channel from 18 to 30,000
cycles with maximum harmonic distor-
tion of .6 percent. We'd hate to have to
pass a blindfold comparison test on any
of the above equipment; it's all so dili-
gently designed and crafted as to make
differences virtually indistinguishable.

Bearing in mind the ample floor plan
of a regal residence, we've put emphasis
on performance rather than size in sclec-
ting speaker systems for illustration. The
Bozak В-4000 ($495) is a three-way in-
finite bafle unit employing two 16-ohm
woofers, one midranger, and a minor
galaxy of broad-dispersion treble speak-
ers. Altec's Carmel ($324) features a pair
of this company's 414A bass speakers, a
type much favored in cinematic installa-
tions, working in conjunction with an
804A high-frequency driver. The Klipsch
Cornwall ($408) is a direct radiator with
rearloaded port and utilizes a magnifi-
cently solid-sounding 15-inch woofer. In
the supersystem range, consideration
should also be given to the Electro-Voice
Patrician ($875), the JBL Metregon 201
($1140) and the KLH Model Nine elec-
trostatics ($1140 the pair). As mentioned
earlier, however, choice of speaker sys-
tems is very much an individual matter.

Blanket recommendations, as a matter
of fact, are to be avoided in any portion
of the high-fidelity picture. We've come
to realize that it's as hazardous to predict
hi-fi listening tastes as it is to predict the
outcome of a blind date. But this is all
part of the game—and the fun.

van doren unadorned in
a special playboy pictorial

Mamie Van Doven is one
of the many Hollywood stars
who find the footlights a more
satisfactory setting in which to
sparkle. These photos of her
before and during her new
night-club act, plus four shots
for which she posed exclusively
for PLAYBOY, herald the onset
of a renewed career for a girl
whose life had seemed to be

leveling off at an unsatisfac-
tory plateau. Mamie Van
Doren of the movies was a
strikingly stunning lass who
had been married to, and di
vorced from, band leader Ray
Anthony while her career
slogged along through such
inauspicious roles as a wait
ress in All-American, a harem
girl in Yankee Pasha and that
nadir of prominence: a part
in one of the many Francis
films, where all acting plays
second fiddle to the antics of
a talking mule. Despite this
lethal limbo in which she ex-
isted, Mamie was outstanding
enough to be noticed and
known by name to the movie
going public, though — typical
of the fate of many a bosomy
blonde starlet —she was inev-
itably compared with Jayne
Mansfield or Marilyn Monroe,
then dismissed from film pro
ducers’ minds as just another
good-looking chick. In an in-
dustry constantly sceking new
faces, her already established
looks had become a liability.

VIRA

In her lushly furnished dressing room, a lusciously unfurnished
Mamie takes her eye-filling ease. A well-known baseball fan,
Miss Van Doren bats a thousand in our league.

"Mamie was far from satisfied
with a renown based strictly
on physical assets. She de-
cided to make herself vulner-
able and perform in a medium
where retakes are impossible:
night clubs. In front of a
live audience, she knew, only
talent counts; a beautiful
body and lovely face are
secondary considerations. As
these photos illustrate, Miss
Van Doren does not quite
believe in entirely hiding her
attributes, though. Her act,
neatly blending philharmonics
with physiognomy, is easily
the best of all possible whirls
Mamie could take at live show
business. Of the rehearsals, she
says, "There were songs to
learn, dance steps to learn, cos-
tumes to be designed . . . 1"
Nevertheless, she did accom-
plish all, and soon sang and
danced her way through songs
like Let's Do It, 1 Cain't Say
No and a rousing rendition
of Making Whoopee for her
finale. Mamie admits to “a
strong Swedish descent," has
platinum-blonde hair and
dark-brown eyes, and her well-
distributed 110 pounds stand
at five feet, four inches. “The
more a gitl displays her physi-
cal charms,” says Mamie, “the
less trouble it is to keep a
husband." In these photos,
Miss Van Doren seems to be
singularly untroubled by any-
thing at all.

PHOTOGRAPHY BY FRANK BEZ

LA |

PLAYBOY

1064 PLAYBOY ALL-STARS ccontinuca rom page 20

Gillespie, Miles Davis, Cannonball Ad-
derley, Gerry Mulligan, Horace Silver,
Sonny Rollins, John Coltrane, Art
Blakey and a few more of the renowned
— were able to work about as often as
they liked. With the Playboy Clubs a
bright exception, it became more difi-
cult for jazzmen on the way up to find
nightclub employment. For some even
well-known jazzmen, layoffs became
more frequent than engagements.

One apparent reason for this decline
in club work was the preference of many
aficionados for spending their money on
records and listening to the growing
number of jazz radio programs rather
than searching out live jazz. Club
owners complained, furthermore, that
there were not enough sure-fire draws
among jazz combos to sustain the clubs
through less prosperous weeks when they
might have taken a chance on less popu-
lar combos. Nor, a number of owners
added, could they afford the rising prices
of even some of those better known
combos who attract appreciable audi-
‘ences. Accordingly, there were clubs that
operated fewer nights or that changed
from an alljazz policy. А few closed.
Among those that expired during the
year was Nick's, a Dixieland bastion in
Greenwich Village for more than 27
years.

With little chance for work in regular
jazz rooms, the avantgarde players, par-
ticularly in New York, turned to coflee-
houses for intermittent employment and
also arranged concerts in lofts. A similar
development took shape in Hollywood
with the growth of “after-hours theater
jazz” — early-morning concerts directed
and promoted by musicians.

The college concert wheel remained
open largely to only the more popular
groups. There were, however, small ini-
tial indications that there might be
some room for jazz concerts in the cul-
tural centers proliferating around the
country. New York's Lincoln Center,
which may influence the programing of
other cultural enclaves, set aside three
evenings of jazz in August. Veterans Ben
Webster and Budd Johnson shared the
first; modern main streamers Benny Gol-
son and Oliver Nelson were heard in the
second; and the final event was devoted
to the experimental jazz of George Rus-
sell and Jimmy Giuffre. Earlier in the
year, Gunther Schuller devoted the last
of six enthusiastically received concerts
of 20th Century Innovations at New
York's Carnegie Recital Hall to a pro-
gram of Recent Developments in Jazz.

During the summer, incidentally,
Schuller was associate head of the com-
position department at Tanglewood in
the Berkshires, and he was responsible

120 for the first jazz concert to be held at

the Tanglewood Festival. As more of the
younger classical musicians with back-
grounds and continuing interest in jazz
achieved power in the classical world,
it was also likely that places would be
found for jazz musicians at summer
classical music festivals and even among
the faculties in the major music schools.

Among the more ambitious intercol-
legiate jazz festivals during the year were
those held at Villanova in February and
at the University of Notre Dame in
March. At the latter school, the Bob
Pozar trio from the University of Michi-
gan defeated 11 other combos to win
the award as the outstanding small unit
at the festival. The same trio was also
judged “The Finest Jazz Group” at the
event. And when Pozar's first album was
released this year on Mercury (Bold
Conceptions), its critical acclaim through-
out the country attested to the quality
of the talent which is emerging from
this heightened jazz activity in the col-
leges. (Paul Winter, who now records
for Columbia and who was an excep-
tionally effective musical ambassador for
the State Department in Latin America
in 1962, had won the Georgetown Inter-
collegiate Jazz Festival in 1961.)

As jazz became increasingly accepted
in schools, its relationship to the church
also grew closer. At a convention of the
Illinois Synod Lutheran Church in
America, Reverend Ralph W. Lowe of
Buflalo predicted that a significant. per-
centage of future church music in
America could be based on jazz “We
are guilty,” he said, “of trying to keep
God only in certain particular forms."
Interestingly, at the Second Vatican
(Ecumenical) Council, an initial consen-
sus among Church Fathers was that con-
temporary and folk art forms could
legitimately be integrated into Roman
Catholic ceremonial so long as they were
not irreverent, undignificd or mediocre.
Father Norman O'Connor, director of
radio-TV communications for the Paul-
ist Fathers in New York, added that he
saw nothing irreligious in commission-
ing a jazz composer to write a jazz Mass.

During the year, jaz functioned in
the church at, among other places, the
Yale Divinity School chapel (4 Musical
Offering to God by composer-divinity
student Thomas W. Vaughn) and at the
Advent Lutheran Church in New York
whose pastor, John Gensel, included jazz
might clubs as part of his ministry. In
Buffalo, the Reverend Paul Smith, once
the drummer with the Three Sounds,
explained his use of jazz in the church
as an aid in helping him communicate
with youngsters. As a whole, however,
the middle-class Negro church was re-
luctant to utilize jazz in its services. Said
Reverend Smith, whose congregation was

integrated, “The Negro church thinks
jazz is something bad. They don't know
God is just as much represented in jazz
as in the classics.”

Back on the secular trail, there were
no striking breakthroughs in the use of
jazz on network television. A few jazz-
men made individual guest appearances
on variety shows, but there was still no
prime time series concerned entirely with
jazz. Jazz Scene U.S.A., however, a half-
hour series of taped shows with Oscar
Brown, Jr., as master of ceremonies, did
achieve some sales success in individual
markets through syndication and was
also sold to a wide range of foreign out-
lets— from France to Nigeria to New
Zealand. By years end, Jaz Scene
U.S.A. with the approval of the State
Department, was being offered for sale
in Ri Hungary, Poland and Yugo-
slavia, thereby becoming the first jazz
television series to have been made
available within the Soviet hegemony.

Another 30-minute jazz television
series, Jazz Casual, continued to set new
standards for spontaneity and freedom
from television gimmickery. The noncom-
mercial project, produced and hosted by
critic Ralph Gleason, started a second
round of programs in the fall and was
carried by the full National Educational
"Television Network of some 75 stations
in the United States and Puerto Rico.
‘Typical guests were Gerry Mulligan,
Earl Hines and Jimmy Rushing. Glea-
son, in full control of each show, al-
lowed musical autonomy to the guest
of the week. Indications were that Glea-
son would be doing at least eight jazz
programs a year for the National Educa-
tional Television Network for some time
to come.

Slowly, during the year, jazz com-
posers were being considered for stage
and film productions which were not
concerned with jazz subjects. John Lewis
wrote the incidental music for William
Inge’s Natural Affection, which had a
short run on Broadway during the
1962-63 season. Mal Waldron was re-
sponsible for the score — featuring Dizzy
Gillespie —of the film version of The
Cool World. (As an improvising off-
screen voice, Gillespie proved to be a
major asset to the Academy Award-
winning animated short subject, The
Hole, produced by John and Faith Hub-
ley) Erroll Garner created the music for
another movie, A New Kind of Love;
and toward the end of the year, it was
announced that Miles Davis and Gil
Evans had collaborated on the score of
anew play, The Time of the Barracudas,
starring Laurence Harvey.

Overseas, jazz continued to expand.
In August, Max Frankel reported from
Moscow in The New York Times: “Jaz
—good, bad and atrocious—is every-
where now in the Soviet capital and has

(continued on page 177)

ADY LUCK

humor By JACK SHARKEY anm (| th e

LY ISI GS

a collection of tongue-in-cheek clef-hangers on courting the musical muse

WHILE 1 USUALLY улат for the general public, today I would like to address myself, instead, to
that small group of мату-суса young hopefuls who are would-be songwriters, and explain to
them why they should throw away their metronomes and go home (if that’s where they work,
they should leave home): Talent has nothing to do with writing successful music.

To write a song is easy. To write a hit song, however, is next to impossible — unless you are
properly inspired to think of exactly the right lyrics, This can only be done through dumb luck.

1 know you won't believe this on my say-so alone, so I will have to reveal the basis for my
thesis: the true story of how America’s best-loved songs came to be composed in the first place.
And once you realize the odds against your ever becoming similarly inspired, you will destroy
your piano, shoot your music teacher, tear up your rhyming dictionary and take up a new
vocation with more of a future, such as selling spats.

One day, when Cole Porter was wandering aimlessly through the Upstate New York farm-
Jands, he came upon a roadside enclosure in which were housed what seemed to be young female
deer; however, they were all fluffy with heavy woolen coats. Bemused, he walked up the path
to the farmhouse nearby and inquired of the owner what sort of animals they might be.

“Oh, they're deer, all right, Mr. Porter," the man explained, leading Cole down into the
enclosure for a closer inspection. “Through selective breeding, I've been able to bring out the
wool-bearing propensities of the animals.”

"Are there only does?" asked Porter. "I don't see any bucks."

“Oh, they're out back. Got to keep them apart, or the males fight over the females. But 1
wouldn't exactly call these does; too much like sheep to be called anything but ewes.”

"Yet they're not really sheep, but actual deer, huh?" said Porter. The farmer's answer
was interrupted by the unexpected pettishness of a nearby female who butted Cole up against a
pile of granite. He sat up, dazed, shooting lights flaring in his (concluded on page 182)

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ANCELIQUES DELIGHTFUL DECEPTION

Ribald Classic from the memoirs of Са

anova

IE ТИРКЕ WAS ANYONE in all of Italy as beautiful as my
mistress, Cecelia, it was her young cousin, Angelique, who
was engaged to marry Don Francisco of Tivoli. Yet,

although I treated this magnificent child with more than
the usual amount of courtesy one bestows upon the relatives
of one's mistresses, she responded with what must be con-
sidered less than polite cordiality. џ

When it was decided that the prospective bride and bride-
groom would spend a week at his estate in Tivoli, and
Cecelia and 1 were named chapero I told the girl how
delighted | would be to spend а few days of the happy
season with them.

“I assure you," she replied, "that after 1 have become
the lady of the house, you will be the first person excluded.
Consider. yourself as having received fair warning
m most obliged for the timeliness of your
signorina,” 1 replied
Then act accordir
conversation.

When I related this unkindness to Cecelia, she attempted
to comfort me. "Do not mind her, Giovanni," she said.
"She is à virgin, and as such has not mess
of disposition that comes from having known love."

My feelings thus asuaged, 1 consented to go with them
as chaperone, if for no other reason than that 1 felt the
weck in the country would give Cecelia and me an oppor-
y to demonstrate our mutual rdor in different. su
roundings. As it was, however, 1 was quite surprised to
find. that. the ment at Don Francisco’s estate was

notice,

she said coldy, terminating the

quired the sw

was to sleep with Angelique, and 1 was to share
ng room with Don Francisco.

“Ie would seem that if they planned to have this sort
of chaperone, they might have selected two older and less
warm-blooded people.” I told Cecelia, “Sharing a room with

Don Francisco is not my idea of an enjoyable way to pass

7 she replied. “Be patient.
day she

very heavy sleeper, and that
simple for us to arrange a rendezvous. All we need do, she
explained, was wait for the gir] to fall asleep. Then Cecelia
would signal me by rapping lightly on the door that sep-
arated our rooms. 1 could then proceed to the room the
two girls shared, take my pleasures with Cecelia, and return
at leisure to my own room.

That night fortune smiled on me in the form of Don
Francisco, who, no sooner than be y
fell into a deep sleep, as if under sedation. While he snored
loudly, I crept out of bed and went to the door, through
the keyhole of which I observed the two girls completing
their nighttime preparations, Happily, in that warm cli-

ate, these preparations consisted of removing their cloth-
g and to bed in the same costume which our first
mother, Eve, wore: namely, the costu
born

Cecelia, knowing that I was wait structed Angelique
to take the side of the bed near the window. The virgin
cousin, unaware that she was exposing her secret. beauties
to my eager eyes, crossed the room in complete nakedness
and lay down as she had been told. Then Cecelia doused
the Lump and the room was in silence. Moments later she
called Angelique by name, and when th
spouse, she signaled me that our time had come.

The visions that had tantalized me through the keyhole,
10 say nothing of the prolonged abstinence of the days be-
fore, had left me in а most eager state. 1 cannot describe

nformed me that she had found

would be

down, immedi:

5

ой!

ie in which she was

e was no re

the ecstasies of Iove that engulfed me, the del
that followed one another. u
us surrender the vigorou

icious raptures
wil the sweetest. fatigue made
ule we had been waging.

However, no sooner had the fulfillment of our efforts
been reached than Angelique ignited a candle, and asked
us what we were doing.

"Fear mot, my sweet cousin,” replied Cecelia. "We are
only performing the ritual that acknowledges one's accept-
nce of the rules of love.”

“Then, 1, too. would like to admit to such rules.
lique replied. "If. you refuse me, 1 shall be forced to tell
your parents what you have done.”

“We are not ashamed,” said Cecelia
not deny you, simply because we believe it is ju
and that you should enjoy it as we have. Therefore, go,
awake your fiancé and. we shall spend the rest of the night
here.”

“My fiancé would not understand,” said Angelique. “He
would think unkindly of me. Since you consider it such
а noble activity, I'm sure you wouldn't. mind if 1 shared

n to protest, but T pointed out that a dis
cussion of the matter would only serve to call Don Fran-
ciscó's attention. to our indiscretion. Therefore, it would
be best that we clique her wish.

consented, 1 proceeded to perform the
h the beautiful Angelique, and 1 must
confess that 1 felt the rapture of a beginner as my ardor
leaped with Angelique's ecstasy as she, for the first time,
ampled the joys of amorous combat.

After we had completed our romp, I retumed to Don
Francisco's room and slept the sound sleep of the truly
exhausted. But thereafter, for the duration of the week,
the nightly rendezvous continued, and T found my strong
appetites doubly satisfied,

Tt was not until the day of depara
question Angelique

“Do you now hate me less than you once did?”

“I have never hated vou, Giov But, when one wishes
others to cooperate in one's plans, certain pretensions
are often necessary. I hope you'll forgive my earlier indis-
cretions, and realize that my dislike of you was purely a
fiction.”

Forgive her I did, and thereafte
the fruits of my patience. The earlier fiction, to be sure, was
followed by a series of highly enjoyable facis.

—Adapted by Paul J. степе ЕВ

that I saw fit to

I asked her.

‚ for many years, enjoyed

THE HIPPEST OF SQUARES

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how to talk dirty and influence people

part five of an autobiography by lenny bruce

Jynopsisz In Part IV of his autobiography, last
month, Lenny Bruce told the story of his first obscenity
arrest, in San Francisco, and the subsequent. trial in
which he was found not guilty. He quoted from the
trial transcript to show the manner in which the state
set about arresting him for standing at a microphone
and talking to a nightclub audience of adults, while
down the street other clubs were featuring female im-
personators and. amateur. strippers whose actions ap-
parently did not speak as loudly as Lenny's. Hc also
quoted from some of the routines he had used —
routines developed over the years to express the ob-
servations and impressions formed from the childhood
incidents and later adventures described in the first
chapters of his story. More than any comparable per-
former today, Lenny had built an act which was not
a series of gag routines but a consistent reflection of an
honest, clamorous point of view on the less-than-
perfect aspects of the world. But no sooner had he
matured as а voice with an enthusiastic and growing
audience than those same qualities began to attract
persistent. attention from the “guardians of public
morality." Beginning Part V, Lenny describes the е)
fect on him of an unfolding pattern of hostile trcat-
ment, and the introduction of a different arrest. charge
— illegal possession of narcotics.

————————

SAN FRANCISCO hadn't been my first arrest as a per-
former. It was just typical of the way the whole world was
going for me. All of a sudden, I couldn't turn around
without being Dirty Lenny — in the newspapers, in
saloon Conversations, in courtrooms from coast to coast
and, for all 1 know, out of the mouths of babes.
Where it had really started closing in on me was in
Philadelphia, which we all know is the Cradle of
Liberty, The first time I ever played there, in 1960,
the hostess at the club was arrested for having been
ata party in a home where fe disappeared, leaving
only four holes in the floor where it had been bolted
down. The safe had contained either $240 or half-a-
million dollars, depending on whether you were lis-
tening to the head of the household or to the son who
had thrown the party and subsequently called the
police. None of this had anything to do with me, ex-
cept E must have missed а swinging party, but now I
some

imes wonder whether God wasn't just tuning
up Philadelphia for the sur
lying in wait for me.

alistic ironies that were

That was one h
Philadelpl
delphia
was up.

"Ehe third and fourth times, I was
—I w

nt. Then, the second timc I played
t was uneventful, An uneventful Phila-
so trite I should have known something

"t in Philadelphia
in Pennsauken, across the Delaware River in
New Jersey. But in show business vou never play Penn-
sauken, you play Philadelphia, just like playing New-
ark is playing New York.

Iw 1 plagued by spells of lethargy that third
time. Some of the spells could be described as attack:

as bei

An introspective moment:
Isn't it about time 1
weaned myself from the
bottle?

Writing this historic
opus, E thought it
appropriate lo wear
a period costume.

Here I am, living up to my public image.
A truc professional never disappoints his public.

"Whaddaya mean,
that's aspirin on
your dresser,” the
fuzz said. What's
the needle for? 1
can't stand the taste
of the stuff.

127

PLAYBOY

This lethargy was more than а drowsi-
ness. 1 would find myself dictating and
sleeping, and since I speak in a stream-
ofconscious, unrelated pattern. secre-
taries would be typing into cight-ten
minutes of mumbling and abstraction,
such as one might expect from a half-

awake, halt-aslecp reporter.
Once, while driving a discjockey
friend of mine into town about one in

the afternoon, I fell asleep at the wheel.
1 woke up in a rut.

The name of a good doctor was sug-
gested to me. He asked me if I had
any history of narcolepsy — that's a slccp-
g sickness. I said no. And he pre-
scribed an amphetamine, which I believe
is the generic term for Dexedrine, Benze-
drine, Byphetamine, and the base for all
diet pills, mood elevators, pep pills,
thrill pills — depending on how far you
went in school and what your re
background was.

The religious factor enters (as opposed
to the scientific) because the scientists
ic evidence and the
ircumstantial evidence.
rgument that medicine is not an
exact science and is therefore circumstan-
tial, is merely a wish posed by those who
know that "When all else fails, prayer
will be answered.

Query: “Doctor, I'm sorry to wake you
in the middle of the night like this, but
I have a serious question about opinior
versus fact. In your opinion, can my wife
and I use the same hypodermic syringe
10 inject insulin for our diabetic condi-
Um almost in shock.
Oooops, here I go. Take it, lie.

“Hello, Doctor, this is Tim's wife.
t's serious. Should we share the
Ive got Staphylococcus septi-
cemia. he's got infectious hepatitis. You
do remember me, don't you? You told
me it was all right to marry my first hus-
band, the one who died of syphilis. T
ever regretted it. We have a lovely son
who, incidentally, would like your ad-
dress — he wants to send you some things
he's making at The Lighthouse, a broom

nd a pot holder.”

Actually, I sympathize with doctors,
because they perform a devilish job, and
1 certainly admire anyone with the stick-
to-itiveness to spend that much time in
school. They are actually underpaid in
relation to the amount of time invested
in training, no matter how much thi
make. A specialist may have nearly 20
years of no income at all to make up
for. But people evaluate their time with
nd they figure his fees are exorbi-

ve no moral com-
ion about hanging the doctor up
is bills while they'll pay the TV
repairman right olf. Besides, they
ize the doctor is in it because of

That's why they 1

та-

128 his desire to serve humanity.

But they also say: “If you haven't got
your health, money isn’t worth an
thing.” Oh, yeah? If you're deathly ill,
money means a hell of a lot. Especially
to the doctor. One illness I had, started.
out with a rash on my face. I received
all the sage advice of my h

“Don't pick it.”

“That's the worst thing you can do,
is pick it.

“If you pick it, it will take twice as
long to heal.

nds:

1 heeded them. 1 didn't pick it — and.
wi

uh nes 1 could |

im

when I was alone and had the door
locked. 1 could have just picked it to
my heart's content. And T even schemed
that if anyone were to ask me late
“Have you been picking your face?” I
would look very hurt and say, "Do I

look like a moron? What am 1, deaf or
something? I'm not going to do the worst

thing in the world!
I didn't pick it, though, and it gor
worse.
ally Y decided to see a skin special-
st. He laid me down оп a cold leather
couch d the first thing he did was
pick it
He didn't even use tweezers. He picked
it — with his fingers.

That's the secret. The doctor:
ones who start the “Don't pick iv”
paigns, because they want to have ex-
clusive pickings.

What is it?” Т asked, as he washed his
hands and smeared gook on my face.

“Its going around.” he said, intently.

"What do vou mein, ‘It’s going
around?" 1 demanded. “You haven't got
a

WI go away,” he assured me.

Those are the two things all doctors
must learn, just before they graduate.
After they've spent years and years learn-
ing all the scientific knowledge accumu-
lated by the medical profession, just as
they are handed their diplomas, the
icf Surgeon General whispers in th

"his going around, and irll go

cars:

go away. Just the way colds “go
and headaches "go Did
you ever wonder where all the colds and
headaches and rashes go when they go
aw k to some central clearing

I suppose, to wait their turn to “go
around" aga

the Red Hill Inn
lars per person, cover, minimum. It w
"Thursday and I had a terrible seizure of
unconuollable, teeth-chautering chills.
When I have the chills, I always like to
talk while my teeth clack together and
Em freezing

My doctor id not to get
out of bed. I had a fever of 102 degrees.

ext day it was 103 degrees. He came to
my hotel twice that day.

Friday night was six hours away.
That's the one correct thing about show
business. The nighttime is specifically
defined. "Lll sce you tonight
9:30. Although, actually, that's
Night is 10:30.

In six hours I would be on the stage
or the boss would be guaranteed a loss
of $6000. Now, what would you do if
vou had a 103-degree fever, knowing that
if you didn't get on the stage. you
wouldn't be paid the 51800 that was
yours from that grow? Having a com
science and realizing that $1800 is a lor
of friggin’ money — the show must go oi
а trouper to the end — I worked. and
came home with a fever of 105 degrees.

My doctor called in a consultant. The
consultant called a nurse to try to bring
my fever down. The fever subsided and
the Staph bug lay dormant— it woke up
six months later nice and suong, and
most Killed me for a month and a half

mcai

evening.

Mount
A year later, in September 1961, while
playing Philadelphia — again, Pennsau-
ken, to be exact —I was staying at the
John Bartram Hotel in Philadelphi
across the street from Evans Pharmacy, six
blocks away from my doctor's office, and
several miles away from the Red Hill
Inn.
Т st
recu

ed to get chills and, fea
nce of Staph.

ша
I telephoned my
doctor. He was away for the weekend.
But his consultant put me into Haver-
ford Hospital. I was there four d
then back to the hotel: at ten minutes
ter twelve noon on September 29th 1
heard a knock on my door at the hotel.
Which was indeed disturbi
1 had left an adamant request tl
not be disturbed.

Bam! Bam! Bam!
to refrain from

you manage
knocking at my door?"
It’s the manager.” Bam! Bam! Ва
“You better open up — it's for your own
good.”

"Hello, desk? There's some kind of
nut outside my door who says he's the
manager. I'd like the police;

Crunch! Crack! Plaster fell, and the
door walked in wearing size-12 shoes.
It’s the police.”
‘Christ, what ser
you guy
Never mind the shit,

ice. I just called for

where's the

shit?
Now is that w
"Where's the shit?" knowing that Pl do
a bit. If I copped out to it — dat is, if
ny shit — "The shit, sir, if
you're referring to the products of Parke
Davis, is scattered on my dresser. And if
you will kindly remove that no xor pr
TUR sign from my arm . . . | cannot do
(continued on page 132)

rd — these guys

there were

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MARILYN WALTZ, April 1954 MARGIE HARRISON, January @ June, 1954
T7 з ч со '

Ёё LS #
ARLINE HUNTER, August 1054 MARGARET SCOTT, February 1954

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JACKIE RAINBO

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MARILYN MONROE, December 1953

PLAYBOY

132

how to talk dirty (соштига from page 128)

so with your handcuffs restraining me."
Officer Perry of the Philadelphia Nar-
cotics Unit testified the next day: “Armed
with a search and seizure warrant signed
by Magistrate Keiser, wc went to the
John Вапғат Hotel, room 616. Upon
gaining entrance to the room, we did
conduct a search of the defendant's room
nd found in a bureau drawer the fol-
lowing paraphernalia: one green box
containing thirty-six ampules labeled
Methedrine, and also one plastic vial
containing eleven white tablets, not la-
beled, one glass borde containing —"
And the court interposed in the per-
son of Der Keiser himself (the magistrate
who had issued the warrant and wa
passing on the val

“We don't know, sir. It hasn't been
analyzed yet.”

The District Auorney:
1 liquids, or powder, or pills?

“I stated eleven tablets in pl.
not labeled: one plastic bottle containing
clear liquid with George Evans Phar-
macy label, narcotic No. 4102, No. 98-
351; one plastic vial containing
orange capsules, labeled George Ev
Pharmacy; one plastic v
thirteen wh
mine; five glass syringes; twenty plastic
syringes; four needles.

Ме interrogated the defendant per-
taining to the paraphernalia, sir. The
defendant stated to me. in company with
the other officers, that he had gotten
these legitimately.

"I then told the defendant to dress

mself, he would come down to Nar-
cotics Headquarters.

“The defendant stated he was too ill to
bc moved. The procedure was to call the
police surgeon. . . . Lenny Bruce re-
fused to let this doctor examine him."

1 had said, "He's your doctor, schmuck.
I want my doctor.”

The transcript, by the м is incor-
rectly punctuated on this point. It
comes out reading, "He's your Doctor
Schmuck .. .”

My doctor's consultant's name was on
my prescription, and the officer con-
tacted him be he explained to
the court, he h ted to check with
the doctor to see whether I could be
moved. The consultant supposedly told
him 1 could be.

І was just out of the hospital and he
ave this diagnosis over the phone!

The officer continued his testimony:
“At that time Lenny still refused to be
moved. 1 called for а police wagon and
stretcher. The defendant taken
out of the John Bartram Hotel on a
stretcher —

And where do you think they sent me,
boys and girls? Where would you send
anyone who is on your stretcher? Why,
to police headquarters, of course.

They got me on the stretcher, and
everybody was sullen and quiet, includ-
ing “Dr. Schmuck, we got to th
vitor. Now, stretchers € made for
hospital elevators. They are seven feet
long, and most elevators fall several feet
short of that. The dialog ran as follows:

STRETCHER-BEARER NUMBER ON! How
the hell are we gonna get this thing in
the elevator? [To patient] Hey, Bruce,
why don't you cooperate and get out of
this thing till we get to the street, and
then you can get back ii

“I'd like to oblige you, Мт. Ayres, but
as noble as your intentions are, some old
cum laude district attorney will pervert
your words on cross-examination: ‘So he
said he was too ill to be moved, but he
got out of the stretcher before geti
into the elevator . . 7

How they resolved. the problem was
10 put the stretcher in the way it fit: up
d down. Feet up, head down.

Because 1 didn't cooperate, a slant-
board position was my reward. People
to the elevator — “Hello, Mr.
I was looking up everybody's

ng

bloomers.

Yes, 1 got the whole police treatment
which, 1 go on record to state before any
committee, is like being dealt with by
the monitors that we used to have in
school, Police brutality is a myth, no
doubt propagated by felons ashamed of
having finked out eagerly at their first
ars. ipating continual sly
references by mother and older brother,
they will grasp for a method of self-
serving. All of which gives rise to the
following ironic fantasy

Oh, how they beat me

Rubber hosed and Sam Levened me
And Brian Donlevy'd me

In their back rooms,

“Give us names, Bruce,

Give us the names and you

Can walk out a free m:
Give us the names of a
Few of your friends.”
But 1, Spartan-sired,
Would do ten years in pri
Before 1 would give

‘The name of one friend —

Or is that a litde bullshit?

1 would give names upon names
Of those yet unborn

Rather than do а 50th birthd
In some max
The halls of justice.
The only place
You sec the justice,
Is in the halls.

"The rotten D.A., how about that
son of a bitch wantinta send those two
poor babies to the gas chamber, two poor
kids barely out of their teens, who just
shot and killed their way across the coun-
try — 48 gas-station altendants who just
missed supper and their lives. And the
kids only got 18 cents and а couple of
packs of cigarettes and a blown-out lire.
Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, the
District Attorney wanis to send those two
poor kids to the gas chamber for a pack
of smokes and 18 cents and a no-good
lire.”

The halls of justice.
‘The only place

You see the justice,

Is in the halls

Where the felon hears
A judge at recess talking
"To that guy from the Capitol:
You sure it's all right
Would I tell you it was
All right if it wasn't

All right? You just tell her
You're a friend of the judge's.
Call Crestview 4, Franklin 7,
Michigan 8, Circle 5, Republic 8,
They're all her answering services,
Those unseen pimps who

Work for Madam Bell.

“Fm sorry, but Miss Kim Pat doesn't
answer her telephone. And I did try one
ring and hang up, then three rings,”

“Well, operator, Vl be truthful with
you, I wanna get laid, and if she’s busy,
how about you? I'm blind, you sec, no
one will ever know unless you should
identify me at some line-up that you
might be participating in.

Police brutality. Think about it.
Think about the time it happened to
you. ТЕ your frame of reference
South, th
Southern revolutior
couniry down there.

“They beat the crap out of me, but 1
proved I was a man. They kept beating
me, but I didn't give them no names."

“What names, schmuck? You were ar-
rested for exposing уоште!

As | look at the transcript of my
Philadelphia hearing, I sce a crystalli
tion of the argument that the Judicial
id the e are one, lessening the
check and balance ellect that in-
tended by Ben nklin and those other
revolutionaries who got together in
Philadelphia.

Crossexamination by ту attorney,
Malcolm Berkowitz, clicited the follow-
ing from the cop who made the pinch:
ch and sei-

zure
А. Yes, sir.
9. May we see it?
А. Positively. (Search and seizure war-
rant is e
THE court: Г attest to the fact its

camined by Mr. Berkowitz.

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my signature thereon.

@ Now, in this search and seizure
warrant the signature of the person re-
questing the warrant is Policeman Albert
И Рат member of the Narcotics
Unit, Person to be searched, Lenny
Bruce, white male, John Bartram Hotel,
Broad and Locust. room 616. Property
to be seized: opium, heroin, Demerol,
morphine, codeine, Dilaudid, cocaine,
marijuana, and any and all other tablets,
powders or liquids. Now of those articles

to be scized, Officer Perry, did you scize
any opium?
^. No, sir.
о. Did you seize any heroin?
A. No, sir.
о. Did you seize any Demerol?
A. No, sir.
Q. Did you scize any morphine?
A. No, sir.
о. Did you seize any сос
а. No, si

court (Interposing): W
saying no to generalize?

^. Your Honor, they are de х
sir, of opium. It contains the opium base.

THE COURT: You can't say no.

MR. BERKOWITZ: I object to this con-
versation, for the record.

THE COURT: I asked the question of the
police officer to be more alert as to his
answer in relationship to this situation

when —
DISTRICT ATTORNEY HARRIS (Inlerpos-

ing): He was being wruthful. sir. He said
he did not confiscate heroin, or mor-
phine, or opium. They haven't been
mentioned in the warrant.

MR. BERKOWITZ: Of five of the things
to be scizcd this scarch and scizurc
warrant, he said he took none of them.
(Addressing witness) Now, Dilaudid, do
you know if you confiscated any Dilau-
id?
^. I do not know.

о. Codeine?

^. I do not know.

. Marijuana?

A. I know there's no marijuana there.
o. In other words, you found nothing
artment that's listed on
nt, did vou?
ARRIS: Objection, sir. That's not
lls for any other
iquids.

your objection.
MR. nERKOWIIZ: Your Honor, the ques-
tion I've asked — if you have sustained
the objection, he can't answer — but the
question Гуе asked isa question relating
to a material matter of fact in this case.
I asked the officer who made an affidavit
that he was going there to sei
listed articles and others of like kind
whether he had found any marijuana
as was on that list, or anything |

id his answer to that question should
be made. There's proper
about that question. It is material.

CHE court: You're asking this man,

MR.
true. 1
tablets, powders or

тик COURT: Su

nothing ii

this police officer, to make a statement
on certain things that were found in
that room that have not been analyzed
of yet.

мк. bERKOWITZ: Your Honor, he made
an affidavit that he was going there to
pick up things of that nature.

E COURT: He eventually will be able
to prove or disprove that.

MR. HARRIS: I think Mr. Berkowitz i
overlooking the entire section — the line
“Any other tablets, powders or liquids”
—and they were confiscated.

мк. BERKOWI1Z: Your Honor, if he had
aspirin in his apartment or any other
powders or liquids of that type. there
would be no violation of the law i
volved. It's only if he possesses some-
thing which he has no right to possession
under any of our laws that this m
could be guilty of crime, and. Detective
Perry, who made the affidavit and who
зА an oath that he was going to this
man's apartment to find those things
named in that warrant, that search aud
seizure warrant —

"HE COURT (Interposing
he expected to find.

MR. BERKOWITZ: But I have to ask him,
because he's the one placing the charge
and we have a hearing this morning.
Did he find And I havc
a right to an answer of that questio

тик court: He did answer those ques-
tions.

MR. BERKOWITZ: He said "No.

тне court: Where he was specifically
certain — for instance, in marijuana, sir,
he found no marijuana. There are cer-
1 prescriptions here, certain bottles
and vials that have not been analyzed as
yet.

MR. BERKOWITZ: Your Honor, he went
further than that. He said: “No, I found
по opium.” “No, 1 found no heroin .

THE COURT (Inferposing): Right.

MR. BERKOWTIZ (Continuing): “No, I
found no Demerol" “No, 1 found no
morphine." “No, I found no codeine,"
No, I found no Dilaudid." “No, I found
по сос Хо, 1 found по таг

DISTRICT ATTORNEY HARRIS: As far as he
knows.

MR. BERKOWITZ: Well, who else knows
if he doesn't?

MR. HARRI

Mk.

That's what

The police chemist.
веккомипи: Where is the police

chemist?

мв. Harris: He's home sleeping. You
know that, Mr. Berkowitz.

MR. BERROWIIZ: Didn't he know ће
had a hearing this morning?

"HE court: The hearing would not

make any difference. He has not had
the opportunity of analyzing it. If уоште
raising a request for analysis, ГИ have

to give a further hearing for that ana
sis, if you're pressing for the analysis.
MR. serkownz: I'm pressing for an

analysis.
mort

I want an analysis now, this
of our hea What are the

police doing making arrests without
being interested in finding out if they
have a case: and take a man never ar-
rested before and stand him up before
the bar of the court and hold him in
custody. If they have evidence, let them
produce it. Give us a hearing this after-
noon. Let them tell us if there is any-
thing —

THE COURT (Interposing): This court,
nor the District Attorney's office, nor the
police department, are they in control
of the city chemist to force him to give
an immediate analysis at the convenience
of the defendant.

MR. BERKOWITZ:
convenience.

THE COURT:

Fm not asking for
‘That's what you're asking
for. е asking for an analysis. I'll
be glad to order an analysis and hold
this defendant in proper or appropriate
bail pending that analysis.

мк. BERKOWITZ: On what charge, your
Honor?

тне COURT: On the charge of violation
of the narcotics laws and the illegal use
of drugs as so stipulated as of this w:
rant.

MR. BERKOWITZ: Where is there any
evidence to entitle you to hold him on
a further hearing on any charge?

THE court: We will produce it...
ми. BERKOWIIZ (Continuing cross-
examination): Now, let me ask you this:
Was the city chemist off duty between
the time you confiscated it in that apart-
ment at ten minutes after noon yesterday
and the end of the normal business day

THE COURT:
has to

І don't thi
nswer this,

nk the witness
because he described
this defendant was the onc
bly deprived the police de-
partment of getting this to a chemist at
an appropriate time by his own actions
and refusal to be apprehended, to be
checked, to be e; x, and to have
this sent to the city chemist in sufficient
time to have an analysis for this da

MR. HERKOWNZ: How many officers
went with you to the hotel room where
Lenny Bruce was staying?

^. Three; Officers Miller and Zawackis.

Q. How many of you had to carry him
on the stretcher, or did you curry him
on the stretcher?

^. We called a wagon.

Q. You didn't carry him?

A. 1 helped carry him, yes,

Q. Did the other two officers with you
help carry him?

A. I think Officer Zawacl
other policemen at that tim

assisted the

о. How many officers carried him
down on the stretcher?

A. Four,

(They carried me to the police station
and set me down none ioo gently.)

Q. How

many olficers were present?

135

PLAYBOY

136

Q. Now, who had control of the vari-
ous things that are displayed before his
Hono

A. 1 had that in my custody.

о. What prevented you from taking it
to the city chemist that afternoon for
analysis?

THE соџкт (Inlerposing): Let me ап
swer for the police oflicer. The police
officer could not get anything there to
the chemist until he had been appre-
hended properly and an arrest report
made, and these reports that must ac
company this to the city chemist.

Is that your answer,
Officer Perry, under oath?

A. That's my answer. That's the cor-
rect answer...

о. Because you wi
didn't go to the chemist?

^. My answer is by the time we got
done with the defendant — he wanted to
be looked at by a medical doctor, d
we made a call to the surgeon. and by
the time I contacted the doctor to see if
he could bc moved, it was late. I got into.
my office and prepared the paper work
and it was too late to deliver to the
chemist. The chemist is closed at fivc
o'clock ...

What made you go look up Lenny
Bruce, other than the fact he was а big-
name ће

К. HARRIS:
ve to reveal the soi
mation.

THE COURT: І sustain the objection.

MR. BERKOWITZ: You ever sec him use
any drugs yourself?

a. No, sir.

Q Did you ever see him buying any-
thing that he shouldn't have bought?

the one who

They don't
е of their infor-

A. I didn't even know the defendant,
sir.

Q You never heard of him, cither?

A. Never heard of him.

о. Never knew he was a headliner?

a. Never heard of him. And he's sup-
posed to be top notch? 1 never heard of
him.

Q. How about Mort Sahl, do you know

who he is
A. Yes, he reads a book or something.

Since I was scheduled to open in San
Francisco the next week — where, you
all, 1 was to be arrested for obscenity
— Г was let go on 51500 bail. In the end,
the Philadelphia grand jury refused to
accept the bill, and they stamped across

1 now carry with
me at су а small bound booklet
consisting of photostats of statements
le bv phys d prescriptions
nd bottle labels. For example, there is
a letter written by Dr. Norman Roten-
berg of Beverly Hills, dated December
29, 1961.

To Whom It May Concern:

Mr. Lenny Bruce has been under
my professional care for the past
two years for various minor ortho-
pedic conditions. In addition, Mr.
Bruce suffers from episodes of se-
vere depression and lethargy.

His response to oral a
has not been particularly sa
tory, so he has been instructed
the proper use of intravenou
jections of Methedrine (metham-
phetamine hydrochloride). This has
given a satisfactory response.

Methedrine in ampules of 10c
(20mg), together with disposable
syringes, has респ prescribed for in-
travenous use as needed.

Mr. Bruce has asked that | write

this letter in order that any peace
officer observing fresh needle marks
on Mr. Bruce’s arm may be assured
that they are the result of Methe
therapeutic

drine for
reasons.

Norn:

injections

I might add that historically there
was quite a problem in England where
/s men were stopping people on
the suect to sec if they were fit for
bur ic, if they had rejected the
nglican church. So these malcontent:
later known as the Pilgrim Fathers.
cowards that they were, fled to escape
persecution.

Upon arriving here, they entered into
thei l beliefs, these Protestants.
and formed their sinister doctrine th;
is at this late date still interfering with
w-enforcement agencies, still obstruc-
ting justice throughout our land, because
of technicalities such as the 13th Amend-
ment to the Constitution. which guar
tees that persons will be safe in their
houses a; t unreasonable searches and
seizures.

Meanwhile, 1 guess what happen
you get arrested in town А (Philade
phia); then town B (San Francisco); the
town C (Chicago); and when you get
to town D they have to arrest you or
what kind of outhouse town are they
running?

It’s а pattern of unintentional harass-
ment.

I wasn't arrested in Engl
ішу was rejected. In 1963, th.
‘The previous year — the first time I went
to England — I did very well there, I got
good reviews, and I had a lot of fun.

Although I didn't get laid once. I had
heard that, gee, in England you really
get a lot of girls, but I was there a month
and I never got laid.

The one time I almost scored was
this hotel. The chick came up to my
тоот after she fell for what 1 call my
innocuous comc-on: "Hey, I gotta go
upstairs for a minute, why don't you
come up, I've gotta ——" And the rest is
said on the car-door slam, and mum-
bled into the carpeting on the stairs.

"Whatd you say?” is answered by,
“We'll just be nute,” leaving the
door open, kecping your topcoat on,
dashing for a bureau drawer as if to get
something, throwing open the closet and
grabbing a briefcase, rumbling through
it while muttering, "Siddown, I'll be
just a second.”

All this is done very rapidly, with a
ig of urgency.

‘Christ, where the hell did 1 put that?

nd

fe

Make yourself a drink. What time is it?
We gotta get the hell outa here. Now
where the hell did 1 put that damn —
remind me to get a new maid. Hey, are
you warm? Christ, it’s hot in here...”

Well, I didn't cven get to the second.

aragraph, when a knock came at the
door, synchronized with the key turning
in the lock.

“Mr, Bruce, I'm afraid we don't have
any of that here.”

(What a temptation to finish the joke:
“And I'm not, cither.”)

To my amazement, the manager
smirked knowingly as the girl looked up

pprehensively, and 1 sat down gingerly
his thin lip curled snarlingly.

“Out, the both of you — out!

Ask anyone who has beca to England.
They do not allow persons who come
into hotels to bring members of the op-
posite sex with them, because they know
what
the maids ever get
a thought, though. М
who instituted. that action. God, what
if all the maids in England were whores?

I think that the Profumo scandal was
а beautiful commentary on the British
image of an asexual people, puritani-
cally mo

‘The reason most men could indict
those people when they themselves were
probably guilty of the same crime which
is not a crime, is that most men won't
dmit that they have ever been with
whores. Not for the morality of й: the
reason they don't cop out is because of
the ego aspect. “What kind of guy has to
give up money for it, man? I get it for
nothing — the girls give me mon

It was right before the Profumo sca
dal that they wouldn't permit me ev
to enter England for what was to |
second engagement at The
ment. I actually flew to Londo:
rejected without anyone thin
more about it than if I were to fly from
Los Angeles to San Francisco.

When 1 got back to Idlewild — and
for the first time in my life, after coming
in and out of this country maybe 20
— ту luggage was thoroughly
hed. 1 was t into a private
room where I was stripped and inter-
nally searched — and, goddamn, that is
humiliating.

It sure bugs you to stand naked ii
front of five guys with suits and shoc-
laces and pens in their pockets.

What if you got an crectio
ТАП right, take your shoes off now and
= what the һе» the matter with you?

“Why don't you put that away?”
“In my shoes,
“I mean make it go down. A damn

weirdo — getting an erection at Customs.

All right, put your clothes о

“Fd like to, sir, but 1 don't know
you noticed my pants—they're rather
tight. ГИ have to wait till this goes

aw

'Come on, now, cut the silliness and
get your pants on and get the hell out
of here."

"I'll try, sir, but . . . it's never done
this before. I guess it's nerves.”

“Well, try 10 pec."

“Where, sir?”

"Out there in the hall in the men's
room,"

"But [ "t get my whatchamacallit,
my oh-my, into my pants. Do you know
anyone who could make it go away? Or
could you gentlemen go out while /
make it go away, up and down . . . Oh,
here, І know what ГИ do, Pl put it in
the wine basket and ГИ carry it.”

k to town C. Chicago. In December
1 was worl t the Gate of Horn.
During one of my performances. 1 was
arrested for obscenity. I was released on
bail and continued working there, but
meanwhile one of Chicago's finest had

letter word in there
spoke against religion,” the club and
everybody in it to get
pinched, he said. And there was ge

or

in dange clear?

"True, I had used a couple of routines
in which I wondered wl Christ would
f Hc came back and took a tour

the various or ns th

we used to be
famous for; it's called the right to wor
ship as you please — and criticize as you
plea

Of course, there'l
nists who will u

always be Commu.
to take that right away
from you. And bureaucracy, where they
tell you, “This is the way it
question it, don't criticize it.

1 wonder if there's one good religious
man who will protect me from all the
Chris who are in God's
image acing ans — Christians
who may vent their hostilities against
me to do me in, not openly, but nev
theless to do me in.

1 finally got fed up with the “dirty
word" thing — people think, Christ, I'm
obsessed with that — but I just have to
defend. myself. because people think
unnatural. They don't know how much
I'm attacked on that, Every new time
I go on the road, the papers are filled
with it.
Sometimes I'll do a bit,
don't know whether to laugh or not —
they seem so brazen and there's just si
lence until they know I'm kidding, and
then they'll break through —like ГЇ

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137

PLAYBOY

138

say "a Jew,” and just the word Jew
sounds like a curse word.

In the dictionary, a Jew is one who
is descended from the ancient tribe of
Judea, but ГІ say to an audience —
you and 1 know what a Jew is: onc
who killed our Lord. Now there's dead
silence there after that.

When I did this in England, I said,
"I don't know if you know that over
here, but it got a lot of press in the
States.” Now the laughs start to break
through. "We did it about two thousand
years ago, and there should be a statute
of limitations with that crime.” Now
they know — ће laughter's all there —
but I'm not kidding, because there should
be a statute of limitations for that crime,
and those who pose as Christi
paraphrasing Shakespeare — neither ha
ing the gait of Christians nor the actions
of Christians —still make the Jews рау
their dues.

I go from a pedantry (Shakespeare)
to the hip argot (pay their dues) for
another deuce.

Then I ask, why should Jews pay

these dues? Granted that we killed Him
and He was а nice guy; and there was
even some talk that we didn't kill
Christ, we killed Gesmas, the one on
the left. (There were, you recall, three
who got done in that day.) But I con-
fess that we killed n, despite those
who said that Roman soldiers did it.

Yes, we did it. I did it. 1 found a
note in my basement: "We killed Him
igned, Morty.

“Why did you kill Christ, Jew?”

"We killed him because he didn't
want to become a doctor, that's why."

Now sometimes I'll get sort of philo-
sophical with it and maybe a litle
maudlin: "We killed Him at His own
request, because He was sad — He knew
that people would use Him.

Or sometimes I will tag it with, “Not
only did we kill Him, but we're gonna
kill Him when He comes back."

I suppose that if / were Christlike,
I would turn the other check and keep
letting vou punch me out and even
Kill me, because what the hell, I'm

God's son, and it’s not so bad dying
when you know you've got a pass to
come buck definitely. All right, so you
have to take a little crap when you
come home...

“Oh, you started again, you can't get
along. Who was it this timc? The Jews,
eh? Why can't you stop preaching:
Look. this is the last time I'm telling
you, the next time you get killed, you're
staying there. I've had enough aggrava-
tion with your mother.”

So I went to trial, in Chicago. At one
point the trial was adjourned, and with
the judge's knowledge I left for a book-
ing in Los Angeles. My intention was to
return to Chicago and bring the case to
а stunning close. But not long after |
landed in Los Angeles (hereafter called
town D), I was arrested on a narcotics
charge. It was my fifth arrest in that city,
bringing the international grand total to
fifteen. At this writing.

(Incidentally, shortly after I left Chi-
cago, the Gate of Horn lost its liquor
license and the owner had to sell out)

While on bail in Los Angeles, I re-
ceived the following communication
from Celes Bail Bond. the local company
which was standing my surety:

Sir: It has come to our attention.
through news me
to be in court
May 1 suggest to you that you
not to violate the conditions of your
bail. You are not to leave the juris-
tion of Los Angeles County,
considering all the other court ap-
pearances that you are to make
here in Los Angeles.

So, if I left California, I would be
arrested for jumping bond. I remained
there. And in Chicago | was found
guilty of obscenity — in absentia— and
sentenced by Judge Ryan to the maxi-
mum penalty of one year in the county
jail and a fine of 51000.

The case is on appeal.

If Lam paranoiac, then I have reached
the acute point of stress in my life. It's
this ba

Recently, while walking to the On
Broadway, a night club in San Fran-
cisco, I observed a young couple in front
of me. They were walking several fect
d of me. They turned the comer
I was going to turn. And just before
І got to the club, they turned into a
hotel and went up the stairs.

I was afraid that they were
І was following them.

This is the fifth installment of “How.
lo Talk Dirty and Influence People,” the
autobiography of Lenny Bruce. Part
VI will appear next month,

PLAYBOY PANEL

I also think you're indicating something
about yourself. The cult of the person-
y doesn't seem to me to have any-
thing to do with jazz musicians at all,
and if it exists, it only has something to
do with the jazz audience.

ADDERLEY; It depends on what you mean
by personality. Some people — Yusef
Lateef, Mingus. Dizzy— have strong
personalities which they are able to
project. They play at people. Yusef, for
instance, plays through the horn, not
just into thé horn. Pcople who don't
have this, who cannot project, will never
be successful even if they play beauti-
fully. cxample, as a group, the
Benny Golson— Art Farmer Jaztet
lacked a strong enough personality, and
it [ailed. The Modern Tazz Quartet has
several strong personalities. They even
go in different directions. Everybody in
that group is strong, and the group's
collective identity is also strong. Dave
Brubeck has a strong personality in the
sense that he has a definite identity. It's
not a wishy-washy kind of thing.
MULLIGAN: Any public performer has to
haye a strong personality to be unu-
sually successful. There are more things
possible for somebody who is accepted
as a personality, aside from being a
musician, than there are for the straight
musician who doesn't project.

SCHULLER: Yet I would suspect that those
who didn't make it to the top in the
sense of a fairly broad acceptance must
have had somcthing missing beyond
just the matter of personality.

MULLIGAN: Yes, if a man can blow, it
doesn't matter if he's old, if he's blue,
or if he's got a personality. As long as
people like him. If he can blow.
SCHULLER: What I mean is that the matter
of coming on with a fantastic getup or
a goatee or other “quirks” of person-
ality are all in the realm of fandom. But
the more serious listeners to jazz, alter
all, are very sensitive to the subtle de-
grees of projection which a player has
or doesn’t have. A man can be a very
fine musician, but there can be a certain
kind of depressing or negative quality in
his music that will hold him back in
terms of acceptance. It may be that you
cant fault his music in any way
technically, but it doesn’t have this way
of going out there into the 20th row.
And if that’s the case, then I think
there’s nothing terribly wrong in the
fact that such a man does not become
the star that, say, Charlie Parker was.
MINGUS: You're underestimating the fact
that jazz is still treated by most people
if it were show business. The question
has some validi Ta ‘Thelonious
Monk. His music is pretty solid most of
the time, but because of what's been
written about him, he's one of those
people who'd get through even if he

(continued from page 58)

played the worst piano in the world.
Stories go with musicians, and that again
is the fault of the critics — and of the
jazz audience, too. There are many ways
of being successful. Like going to Belle
vue. After I went there on my own, and
the news got out, I drew more people
In fact, I even used to bounce people
out of the clubs to get a little more at-
tention, because I used to think that if
you didn't get a write-up, you wouldn't
attract as many people as you would with
a lot of publicity. But now 1 sce what
harm that kind of write-up has done to
d I'm trying to undo it.

I don't know about this cult-of-
personality thing. A musician must be
who and. what he is. If his personality is
‚ and if he lets it come through
t naturally, he'll reach an audience.
But 1 don't think you can force it.
PLAYBOY: While we're talking about pop-
ularity, is there a meeting ground
somewhere for the multimillion-viewer

audience required by TV and the more

specialized attractions of jaz? Most
efforts in the past have been either fi-
nancial or artistic failures, or both.
GLEASON: As far as I'm concerned, there's
a place for jazz on ТҮ, because I'm
volved with doing a jazz show on
television. It's on educational television,
so we aren't hung up with commercials,
we t hung up with having to play
somebody's tune or allowing somebody
to sit in with the group. And we aren’t
hung up with all the restrictions of
commercial television as to length and
selection of material. We have a multimil-
lion-viewer audience, and the musicians
do whatever they want to. In fact, the
musical director of each one of the
programs on Jazz Casual is the leader
who's on the program that week, He
selects the music. Sometimes he lets us
know in advance what it will be and
sometimes we find out when he plays
And I don't think jazz
specialized. Let's just say
grams in the past have been failures —
ГИ buy that — with the exception of the
one show they did on Miles Davis, and
that CBS show, The Sound of Jazz.
PLAYBOY: To give credit where it's duc,
both of those programs were produced
by Robert Herridge.
GLEASON: With the exception of those
(and Jazz Casual), almost everything
I've seen on television on jazz has been
a failure. And the reason for it is that
television has never been willing to ac-
cept the music on its own terms, but
always wanted to adapt the music to
tlevision’s requirements. the
assumption that you had to produce a
product that was palatable to some guy
walking down the streets of Laredo, I
guess, I don't know. Jazz will get alon
on television if they'll leave j

arci

Under

cians alone, and let them play naturally.
GILLESPIE: Exactly. TV, of all medi:
ideally suited to the uniqueness ol jazz,
because you can hear and see it while
i's being created. I think the big mistake
in most of the jazz formats in the past
has been their lack of spontaneity.
Maybe jazz could be done on TV by
means of a candid-camera technique.
KENTON: If you're talking about the
major networks, I'd say there's no place
on television for jazz at this time at all,
ise television has to appeal to the
masses, jazz has no part of appealing
to the masses. It’s not a case of how well
presented — whether by candid
or some other device. It's just
272 is a minority music, it appeals
to a minority, and that minority is not
large enough to support any part of
commercial television.

RUSSELL: I'm almost as pessimistic. It won't
happen so long as the tyranny of the
majority is working. No producer in his
right mind is going to have the courage
to buck the majority and come up with
something tasteful. Yet, if one of the
powers in the industry did have enough
courage to put on something v
fully conceived, and if he did it often
nough, I think jazz would eventually
get through.

ADDERLEY: Well, so far all of you have
bcen talking about jazz as a separate
thing on television. 1 don't really see
why jazz has to be shunted off to be a
thing alone. 1 don't see why it's not
posible to present Dave Brubeck as
Dave Brubeck, jazz musician, on the
same program with Della Reese. We in
the community of jazz secm to feel that
«1 our own little corner. because
we have something different that is su-
perior to anything else that's going. But
it's all relative, and there's a kind of
pomposity involved in that kind of atti-
tude when you check it. I think that I
could very easily be a guest artist on
the Ed Sullivan show or the Tonight
show along with the other people they
have. Like Allan Sherman. Let me do
my thing, and there's a good chance I

might communicate to the same mass
audience that he does. The same thing

true of Miles Davis or Dizzy or
onc else. I think there's a place for us
on television — once we get admitted to
the circle.

MULLIGAN: I still think it would be possi-
ble to produce a reasonably popular jazz
show, but it would have to start on a
small scale. I think a musician — whether
it's me or whoever — should be master of
ceremonies if the show is going to have
the аша of jaz. And this musi
would have to be able to produce a
musical show with enough variety to be
able to sustain itself. If I were doing
it. and Га like nothing better than to
try, I'd prefer to do it as a local show
which could be taped for possible use on

ian

139

PLAYBOY

мо white musi

networks. That way we could keep cx-
penses down while we tried to prove
what kind of audience we could at-
tract.

Now, Cannonball talks about being
part of the circle of guest attractions
on the major shows. Well, our group has
been on some of them, and I don't know
whether it really does us any good or
not. Being on that kind of show does
give you a kind of prestige value
people who have no awareness of
But I wonder whether secing and hi
ing jazz groups in that sort of surround-
ng gives TV viewers any increased
sitivity to ја I think not. It just
makes them think of me — or any of the
other jazz musicians who make those
shows— as being bigger names, as be
bigger stars in relation to stars as thcy
think of them. But it doesn't really help
create a larger audience for jazz itself. 1711
keep on doing those appearances as long
as they're offered to me, but what I'd
really like to try is that local show. 1
think we could build a really good pres-
entation which people would go for. But
nobody's made an offer yet.

MINGUS: Let's face it. Television is Jim
Crow. Oh, for background scores, the
white arrangers steal from the latest jazz
records. But as for putting our music on
television in our own way and having
us play it, no. Not until the whole thing,
the whole society changes.

PLAYBOY: Which brings us right into the
sensitive arca of jazz and race. A sig
nt number of Negro musicians have
expressed their conviction that, with a
few exceptions, Negro jazzmen are more
authentic" and tend to be morc original
and creative than their white counter-
parts. They say this is not a genetically
determined condition, but results from
environment —the kind of music the
Negro child hears and the kind of experi-
ences a Negro in America has. Do you
agree with this contention? Also, some
have termed this feeling of superiority
among some Negroes “Crow Jim.” Do
you think that term is valid in so far as
it connotes a form of reverse prejudice.
in jazz?

GLEASON: I agree that Negro jazzmen аге
more authentic and tend to bc morc
original l creative than their white
counterparts. I also agree that this is not
а genetically determined condition. but
results basically from environment.
SCHULLER: I'd agree, too, but I'd add the
ise of this kind of back-
ground, a majority of musicians among
Negroes will turn to jazz while a ma-
jority of white musicians — because they
music
in their formative years — will not. But,
of course, the picture is changing all

the time. And this has never meant that

ans cannot — by some fluke

or some fortuitous set of circumstances:
— have the kind of background that Ne-
ns have.

ing that.
says being white, black, purple or green
makes you a better jazz musician. I think
that your inner core, your philosophy,
is the important thing. The depth of
your convictions and your ability to get
these convictions across is what counts.
“To me, it's ridiculous to say that a Negro
expresses jazz better than a white per-
son, or the other way around. You пи
tion environment. Let mc say that if Т
were going to pick saxophone players, I
would not pick them on the basis of what
their childhood environment had been,
but on the basis of what they say as
adults. And 1 would pick individuals.
“There would certainly be a Paul Des-
mond who can probably express a me-
lodic line beter than any other Negro
or white player and who has an cmo-
tional quality that is individually his own.
There would be a Stan Getz There
would be a Gerry Mulligan. There would
be a Charlie Parker. There would be a
Sonny Rollins. When I think of these
men, I'm not going to think about color.
ADDERLEY: Although I pretty much agree
that Negro jazz musicians, because of
their environment, tend to be more au-
thentic, I think that basically it's a mat-
ter of sincerity and of really being in
love with the music. Anyone can have a
passion for jazz. 1 think Zoot Sims is
just as creative as anyone else. He's pas-
sionately involved with the real, pure,
unadulterated jazz. So is my pianist, Joe
Zawinul, an Austrian. When Joe plays
on a record, I defy a layman to deter-
mine his race. Гус always contended
that environment and exposure deter-
mine the way a guy performs. I'm sure
no one could tell whether Al Haig was
white or Negro.

Certainly jazz is a synthesis of various
Negro forms of music, but recently, it
has added colors and developments from
European “serious” music (and I'm not
implying jazz isn’t serious). So today, it
is less a Negro music than an American
music, because everybody is contributing
in his own way. Eventually jazz will be
“colorless.

However, as of now, jazz is still quite
colored. It's true you can't tell Joc
Zawinul’s color from listening to а
record, but you can certainly tell Stan
Getz is white, as contrasted with, say, John
Coltrane. You simply can't deny, if you
know anything about the medium, that
you can tell the color of people by the
way they play. As time goes on, though,
this will probably be less and less true.
RUSSELL: I would say that, so far, the im-
portant i ors have been Negroes,
but this doesn’t mean that every Negro
jazz musician is as good as a lot of white
musicians. There are some excellent

nov:

white musicians around, I'll hire for my
nd the best people available. Some-
nd is integrated straight down

bi

imes the ba
the middle and other
four-fifths Negro.
PLAYBOY: What about the charge that
Crow Jim exists in jazz?
MINGUS: Well, until we start lynching
white people, there is no word that can
mean the same as Jim Crow means.
Until we own Bethlehem Steel and RCA
Victor, plus Columbia Records and sev-
eral other industries, the term Crow Jim
has no meaning. And to use that term
about those of us who say that this music
is essentially Negro is inaccurate
unfecling. Aren't you white men asking
too much when you ask me to stop say-
ng this is my music? Especially when
you don't give me anything else?

Sure, we have pride in the music.

People who called themselves civilized
brought the black man over here and
he appeared primitive to them. But
think about what wc'vc donc. We've
picked up your instruments and created
a music, and many of us don't even
know the notes on the horn yet. This
shows me that maybe African civiliza-
tion was far superior to this civilization.
We've sent great white classical trumpet
players into the woodshed to practice
nd try to play some of the things we've
created, and they still haven't been able
to. If you wrote it down for a classical
trumpet player, he'd never even get
started.
GILLESPIE: That phrase Crow Jim doesn’t
make sense. There is and always has
been a kind of aristocracy of art. Those
who feel what they're capable of and
are proud of what they can do. Even
haughty. But I refuse to abide by
color boundaries. Just name the top
tists. Obviously they're not all Negroes.
The good white jazz musicians are as
well recognized by the Negro jazz musi.
cians as they are by the white musicians.
GLEASON: I don't term the fecling of su-
periority among Negro jazz musicians
as Crow Jim. If there’s a definition of
Crow Jim, it seems to me, it is when
you adopt the position that no white
musician can play jazz at all. And no
Negro jazz musician of any major status
adopts this position, as far as 1 know.
I think you might adopt the term Crow
Jim to describe the feeling of some fans
who will pay attention only to Negro
jazz musicians — who will not listen to
any white jazz musician.

But J think that the position of the
white jazz musician who feels himself
slighted these days, or who feels a draft
from the Negro jazz musician, is a very
real position. And I think the only road
out of this situation is the one that Jon
Hendricks describes: “When you cuter
the house of jazz you should enter it
with respect." And I think that white

mes it may be

jazz musicians, many of them in the
past, who have tried to do the impossible
in their music, which is to cross over the
color line in reverse, have made a
mistake. 1 think what they have to do
is to bring into it their own fee
their ow ty- As Dizzy Gillespie
said at a student press conference, "We
aren't the only ones that swing, baby,"
and then he went on to explain about
many mu: in all countries in the

ig and

world who could swing. But that doesn't
act tha

change the jazz is a Negro
music and was ied. and created by
Negroes, But it also does not mean that
it can't be played by non-Negroes. Now
it’s simply a fact that at least one jazz
night club I know of does not want to
book jazz musicians who are not Ne;
because, in the club owner's experience,
uz groups have not made moncy
in his dub for him, and Negro
groups have. On the other hand, it's
quite obvious that he would book Dave
Brubeck if he could.

RUSSELL: Yes, I do think club owners have
fallen into this kind of thinking, but
they perpetuate it much more than the
ms do. I don't think the true jazz
n can be Grow Jim, because the
very nature of the art demands honesty.
And I don't sce how, if the only player
around who is going to do it for you
is a white player, you can honestly hire
anyone of any other color who is an in
fcrior player. Miles, all the leaders, now
have integrated bands. The important
people don't think in Crow Jim terms,
ADDERLEY: While I do feel that practically
all Negro musicians in jazz feel superior
to practically all white musicians in
juz it can be expl
that this was one thing Negroes h:
to grasp Гог a Jong time. The feel
that since we have this, and it is
considered something worth-while,
сап take pride in the fact that we know
we can play jazz better than anybody
else. But I won't accept this on the basis
of ethnic superiority. We have played
this music from its beginning and we
have been exposed to it more than the
whites. But anyone with a passion for the
music and with exposure and with artis-
uy and a chance to play it can develop
good jazz
another point: If a Negro says he can
play better jazz than a white, that gi
whites license to say, “Well, you
play in our symphony orchestras
cause we, as whites, can play classical
music better than you do.” And I think
that's ridiculous, too.

MULLIGAN: Questions like this are not im-
portant to me. People get themselves
all worked up over things like this, but
I don't give a damn if a man is green
or blue. If he can blow, let him blow.
If he can't blow, let him do something
else.

ned by the fact
e had.

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we

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141

PLAYBOY

KENTON: But you do have to face the facts
bout color in jazz today. It is much
more difficult today for white musicians
and colored musicians to play together
than it ever was before. I realize that
the civibrights problem had to arise
and 1 think the Government is doing
just exactly what it should do and had
to do about it. But before the Govern-
ment started demanding integration, we
had many places around America where
we could play together. We called them
blackand-tan clubs and all sorts of
things, where the white and colored
musicians met and played together, and
white and colored dientele came to the
place, But when the Government started
pushing integration, this did away with
almost every one of those places. And
it made the white and colored musicians
kind of stand at a distance, even though
they were always very close before, be-
cause there's the problem of civil rights
that’s like a barrier between them and
that, somehow, is not easily surmount-
The civibrights issue has to be
this country. The barrier now
is such that people even forget what has
happened in the past. Like, a man re-
cently accosted me and wanted to know
why I'd never had any colored musicians
in my band, and I finally had to sit
down and write out about two dozen
mes of Negroes who had played in
my band for long periods of time. But
because of the mere fact that 1 have no
colored musicians in my present band
and that 1 have received some unfavor-
able publicity regarding this, that man
believed Т was Crow and that, of
course, is impossible.

You ask about Crow Jim. Well, I
think that colored audiences started boy-
cotting white jazz as long as ten years
back. And there are colored musicians
who do feel today that jazz is their
music and they don't want white musi-
cians infringing on their art. It's only
natural that they feel that way, but
they're wrong, because the Negro would
not have had jazz without the white man-
If this weren't true, we'd have jazz going
in parts of the world where Africans live.
To discount the white man's position in
jazz is doing the white jazz musician a
great injustice.

PLAYBOY: Do you think there are still elc-
ments of Jim Crow in jazz— in bookings,
in the general way in which Negro
musicians are treated as contrasted. with
the y white jazzmen are treated?
GILLESPIE: There's no doubt that Jim
Crow exists in jazz bookings, as flagrant-
ly as ever. Today, however, it's been de-
veloped into refined refusals.
SCHULLER: Dizzy is right; there is still a lot
of Jim Crow going on, but it's hecome
more subtle. The businessmen in jazz
still apply all kinds of old criteria to the
Negro musician, They treat him as an
entertainer and as somconc below their

142. own level.

ADDERLEY: In practically 200 percent of
the cases, Negroes are always treated as
Negroes. Even if you're treated as a very.
special Negro, It's that old paternalism.
Whites, all whites, regardless of how
liberal need to have somebody to feel
superior to. It makes no difference how
big a Negro gets in terms of money, so-
called social position, and so forth. As
long as the Negro wears the badge, the
lowest white man feels, "Well, at least
Tm nota Negro." In jazz, it some!
works in another way. Somebody will
say, "Your music is really good. I'd like
you to come to my house for dinner.
You know, I wouldn't let just anybody
come to my house for dinner, but you
come to my house for dinner, because
you play very well.” You understand
what I mean? It works the same way all
the time. You're always conscious of the
fact that you're Negro.

PLAYBOY: But is there specific Jim Crow
z7? Some Negro
musicians have complained that some
of the booking offices consider the Negro
jazzman as part of their plantation. And
that some club owners also act that w
ADDERLEY: No, I've never really felt that.
I have felt this: We've played clubs
where a dub owner will very frankly
say, “You draw a lot of white business.
You know, most Negro groups don't
draw a lot of white business. So I can
afford to pay you more because you
draw Negrocs and whites." Color con-
sciousness again. But I've never had the
feeling 0 I was entertainment for the
white folks.
BRUBECK: I’ve always figured that the
charge of Jim Crow in jazz was a fairy tale,
because T played for years during which
one Negro soloist would be making morc
than my entire quartet. Anybody who
says that certain Negroes have not been
paid as much as certain white musicians
doesn't really know the entire story.
Think of Nat Cole. He's been well paid,
and he deserved to be well paid. Don't
tell me Charlie Parker wasn't well paid,
because I know he was. I was there. E
n't think of any jazz musician who, if
he was determined to make it and be-
have and show up on time, didn't get
paid what he was worth. I would say,
however, that there have been discrim-
inatory practices in television. But on
ДУ been harder for the man with
a mixed group, such as mine, than for
the all-Negro or the all-white group. I
know that I lost the highest paying job
1 was ever offered in my life because my
group was mixed. An all-Negro group
took it. And that was on nationwide
television. Within jazz, and within so-
ciety, the mixed groups will meet with

n the business end of ja

c

more problems and will solve more
problems.

GIEASON: There certainly are Jim Crow
elements in jazz just as there are

Crow eleme:

ts in the rest of this society.

I know that there are bookings that
o jazz musicians do not get because
of prejudice. This is considerably less
than it was in the past years, but I think
it's still true today. The situation
changed a great deal, and it's a grea
deal better than it was. This does not
mean that it's good. And the elimination
of Jim Crow is long overduc. There's а
residual Jim Crow in a lot of areas. Jazz
мег this, and if they're
zz musicians, they encounter it
sometimes very strongly.

Ray Charles, for instance, has had a
great deal of this on one-nighter tours
in smaller towns, where it's OK for them
to play, but they want to get "em out of
town as soon as possible. And Negro
jazz musicians are treated like all other

many parts of the country,
where they can't stay in many motels and
hotels. But the way in which the major
booking agencies function, as far as I can
tell from where I stand, is not Jim Crow.
All they're interested in doing is making
money, and theyre not interested any
more than any other money-mak
machine is in the color of the person
who makes the money for them.
PLAYBOY: Thank you, gentlemen. This
conversation has demonstrated. that, a
the music they play, compose and
write about, there is spirited diversity
in the opinions of jazzmen. We have,
however, reached a consensus in a num-
ber of areas. Jazz for one thing, is far
from a dying form; it is instead in a
period of unusual growth and creativity.
Jazz is also clearly cvolving into an art
music, but is retaining its roots in im-
provisation. While there are elements
of prejudice in jazz as in the rest of
society, there is a strong feeling among
most musicians that it is a man's passion
for the music and his ability — not his
color — that determines his worth as a
as all of you have shown
the jazz musician is deeply committed to
his music and proud of its traditions.
Furthermore, the impact of jazz through
out the world is becoming broader and
deeper. It is a remarkable tribute to
this music's vitality and capacity for
expansion that jazz, which was created
country from Afro-American folk
sources, is now an important inten
tior uage whose future is challei
gly unpredictable — and limitless.
This discussion has also proved, to
those for whom such proof is still neces-
sary, that the vintage myth that jazz
mu ns are inarticulate is hardly true,
While jazz is still primarily a music of
the emotions, there is a great deal of
thought and discipline involved in its
conception and execution. The quality
of that thought, as you have shown, is
both penetrating and persistently in

dependent.

PLAYBOY PHILOSOPHY
(continued from page 47)

what is needed is stricter marriage laws,
not stricter laws on divorce. We will ex-
pand, in a later issue, on our belief that.
too easy and 100 early marriages are the
primary causes of marital unhappiness
and failure. But we should recognize here
the extent to which society and the state
produce early and subsequently unhappy
marriages

By making marriage a church-state li-
cense to enjoy the pleasures of sex — by
making sex outside of marriage a social
and legal taboo — our society supplies a
tremendous impetus to early marriage,
whether couples are emotionally, psycho-
logically and economically prepared for
it or not.

Laws limiting the marriage of chil-
dren, and the mentally and emotionally
incompetent are far too lax, Indeed, if
an underage couple elopes and the union
has been sexually “consummated,” our
irrational religious heritage lends strong
argument to allowing the marriage to
stand, whether or not the couple is ma-
ture enough to comprehend and under-
take the responsibilities inherent in
marriage and the raising of a family.

So-called "shotgun" marriages may even
force one member in a relationship into
marriage against the person's better judg-
ment, because there has been sexual inu-
macy or, more often today, because that
intimacy has resulted in pregnancy. If a
literal shotgun rarcly appears asa coercive
force to early and unwelcome marriage
today, the "shotgun" attitude still persists
and society scems more anxious to force
the unprepared into wedlock than to
properly educate the young in how to
avoid unwanted pregnancy or solve, in any
rational and humane manner, the prob-
lem of undesirable pregnancy (through
legal abortion) when it does occur

If an engagement prior to marriage is
seen as a period during which a man and
woman are allowed a time of close ac-
quaintanceship that they may better judge
if each is best suited to the other, then the
entire legal history of breach-of-promise
suits is irrational — whercin a person (al
most alw the male), once having
proposed marriage. is penalized (and
sometimes heavily) for changing his mind.

The observation has been made that
in breach-of-promise actions the average
jury, historically generous with other
people's money, utilizes two prime con-
siderations in the computation of dam.
ages: (1) the plaintifl’s beauty; and (2)
the ability of the defendant to pay. As
a result, verdicts have been generous and.
appel courts have sustained damages
ranging from $500 to 545,000 against
charges that they were e. In one
New York case, the plaintiff had ad-
mitted that she did not love the defend-
ant. She was 20 years of age and the

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144

defendant was 84
Howev

nd partially palsied.
his fortune was estimated at
$15,000,000. The offer to marry the
plaintiff was made only a few days before
the breach-of-promise action was taken.
Nevertheless, the jury awarded the plain-
tiff $225,000, which the appellate coi
reduced to $125,000. 1n a Michigan case,
the jury awarded a woman the sum of
5450,000, which was reduced to $150,000
by the cour

Ploscowe comments, “These verdicts,
however, present only a partial picture
of the social consequences of the breach-
of-promise action. Large numbers of
breach-of-promise actions are settled out-
side of court because of the consequences
which might flow from publicity which
this type of action entails. No man of
се or social position can afford
to have his love life ed in the way
that the tabloid press has made fami
As a result, the adventuress and the gold
digger are presented h an un
leled opportunity for shakedown and
blackmail.”

Our legislatures and courts have fi-
nally come to recognize the undesi

iar.

mature of breach-of-promise suits
pproximately 17 states, includi
York, have now outlawed such

Breach-of- promise suits should obviously
be abolished in all states.

FORNICATION

No human act between two people
more intimate, more private, more
personal than sex, and one would as-
sume that a democratic society that
prided itself on freedom of the individ-
ual, whose Declaration of Independence
prodaimed the right of every ci

10 life, liberty and the pursuit of hap-
piness, and whose Constitution gu:

teed the separation of church and state,
would be deeply concerned with any
tempted infringement of liberty in this
most private act.

But our society still carries the searing
brand of antisexualism inherited from
the medieval Church of Europe and
the Puritanism of England and so, while
America has been traditionally permis-
sive in most areas of human behavior, we
have been resti vc in matters of ses

We have prized virginity and chastity,
especially im women, and proclaimed
that sex outside of the state is
wrong. We have reinforced this religious
wpoint at every level of secular so-
y and the state has further established
this restriction by legislative edic: non-
marital and exbramarital sexual inter-
between consenting adults is pro-
hibited under statutes covering forn
tion, adulte: 1 lewd coh.
48 of the 50 si
Columbia (excluding only Californ:
Tennessee), as well as the Federal M
Act where

This behavior, publicly condemned
throughout most of our societ nd Lor-
bidden by both state

minority — but. by a considerable major-
y of our adult population. Nonmarit
s (fornication) is engaged
imately 90 percent of adult

ccording to Dr. Alfred C. Kinsey and
his research associates at Indiana Uni-
versity (Wardell B. Pomeroy, Clyde E.
Martin, Paul H. Gebhard), in the
monumental study of U.S. sex behavior,
published in two volumes, Sexual Be-
havior in the Human Male and Sexual
Behavior in the Human Female.

Dr. Kinsey and his associates found
that sexual activity varie ly, in both

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form and incidence, depending upon
educational and social background.
Among males who go to college, some
67 percent have sexual intercourse prior
to marriage: among those who receive
some high-school education, but do not
go further, approximately 84 percent

have premarital intercourse; and among
males who do not go beyond a grad

school education, the accumulative in-
cidence figure is 98 percent. Kinsey

reports that in some groups among the
lower social levels, it is virtually impos
sible to find a single male who has not
had sexual intercourse by the time he
reaches his mid-teens, In addition, nearly
all men (about 95 percent) who have
been initiated into regular coital experi
ence in marriage, continue to engage in
sexual intercourse after their marriages
have been terminated by the spouses
death, by separation or divorce. They
“repudiate the doctrine that intercourse
should be restricted to m: relations.
у all ignore the legal limitation on
intercourse outside of marriage. Only
age finally reduces the coital activities
of those individuals, and thus demon
surates that biological factors are, in the
long run, more effective than man-made
regulations in determining the patterns
of human behavior."

Kinsey comments on the nature and
number of partners that may be involved
n premarital intercourse for the male:
There are males, particularly of the up-
per social level, who may confine their
premarital intercourse to a single girl,
who is often the fiancée. There are males
who have some dozens or scores of part
ners before they marry. In some cases,

lower-level males may have intercourse
with several hundred or even a thous:

nd
or more girls in premarital relations.
There are quite a few individuals,
pecially of the grade-school and high-
school levels, who find more interest in
the pursuit and conquest, and in a variety
of partners. than they do in developing
longtime relations м gle girl.”
Although our society places
strongest taboos upon women en:
in sexual

ncn,
educational and о.

have premarital coitus. Unlike the
however, the highe
cial level females tend to I
rather than а lowe: маре with
nonmarital sex experi among wom-
en with a college education, approxi-
mately 60 percent have premarital
intercourse. Postmarital sex for females,
who have lost their spouses through.
death, or separation or divorce, follows
the same general pattern as with the
теп — once a woman has engaged in
regular coital experience as a part of
marriage, she tends to continue to en-
gage in such experience after the mar-
riage has ended. Significantly, with both
men and women, the percentage of total

ve ah

ier.

sexual outlet through coitus continues
to be approximately the same after
the conclusion or a marriage as it was
hin ii
In contrast to U.S. laws foi
nonmarital sex, Kinsey comments,
Sexual Behavior im the Human Mal
“Premarital relations have been more or
5 openly accepted in most of the other
ations of the world, the Orient,
in the Ancient World, and among most
European groups apart [rom the Anglo-
" And in Sexual Beha-
vier in the Human Female, Kinsey
“There is no aspect of American sex Jaw
which surprises visitors from other coun-
tries as much as thi attempt to
penalize premarital to which
both of the parti ng parties have
consented and in which no force has
been involved. . . . There is practically
mo other culture, anywhere in the world,
which all nonmarital coitus, even be-
tween adults, is considered. criminal."
In England, which shares with us a
common Puritan heritage, there no
specific laws prohibiting fornication or
adultery. In the United States, however,
38 states have specific statutes forbidd
fornication — a. single act of coitus be
tween consenting adults. The penalties

states:

for fornication range from a S10
Rhode Island to
years in prison
Arizona, Ar Dela-
ware, lowa, Lo ‚ New
Mexico, New York, Oklahoma, Vermont
and Washington have no state statutes
prohibiting fornication, but Arizona,
a, New Mexico and
prohibiting

lewd cohabitation — а babitu:
ship or one in which an
couple lives together as man and wife,
Mask prescribes a maximum fine
of $500 or two years’ imprisonment for
fornication, or both; Connecticut speci
100 fine or six months in jail as a
lty; North Carolina Taw

relation-
unmarried

imposes aaa e
prisonment as the maximum for the first.
olfense, a doubling of the sentence for
the second conviction, and so on.

LEWD COHABITATION

Cohabitation is defined as a habitual
sexual relationship or onc in which an
unmarried couple lives together as man
and wife. Fourteen states have specific
statutes prohibiting cohabitation. It
would seem logical for society to prefer
sexual liaisons of a more permanent
nature to the more casual, indiscriminate
variety, but logic has very little to do
with our sex laws and, in general, the
penalties. for cohabitation arc more
severe than for random fornication.
Arizona, which has no statute. prohib-
iting fornication, does have one a

imum sentence
Maine,

cohabitation, with an
of three years’ imprisonment;
with a $100 fine and 60-day j
tence for fornication, has a та:
penalty of $300 and five years for co-
habitation; Massachusetts, with $30 or
90 days for fornication, raises the sen-
tence to a maximum of $300 or three
years for cohabi : Arkansas, with no
statute. prohibiting either fornication or
adultery, stipulates a penalty of $20 to
5100 for cohabitation on thc first convic-
tion, a 5100 minimum or one
mum for the second conviction,
to three years’ imprisonment for the third.
Some fornication statutes actually
read more like cohabitation laws, as in
South Carolina, where the statute reads:
ual or
together. . . . Not less than $100 nor
more than $500, or imprisonment for not
less than six months nor more than one
or both finc and imprisonment, at
the discretion of the court.”
"The Alabama Iaw against forn
also has this cohabitation aspect to
it is written specifically to discourage
a continuing relationship between the
same two partners: “Not less than 5100
and may be sentenced to the county jail
for not more than six months: on second
conviction with (he same person, not less
than $300 and may be imprisoned in
county jail for not more than 12 months;
and on th ith the same
person, shall be imprisoned in peniten-
tiary for two years.” (Italics added.)

THE MANN ACT

year

In addition to ihi
statutes, there is a
monly referred to as the Mann Act, that
is used to prosecute persons who engage
in illicit sexual activity, where interstate
wavel is involved. Though olficially titled
the Whiteslave-trallic Ас, and passed
by Congress in 1910 for the specific pur-
pose of curbing interstate prostitution
the law states, “Any person who s
knowingly transport or cause та be trai
ported. or or assist in obtai
portation foi any wom:
for the purpose of pro i
debauchery, or for any other
purpose . . . shall be deemed
a felony" The Federal co
terpreted “any other immoral purpose"
to include fornication — sexual inter-
course between consenting adults— and
thc penalty is a maximum fine of S5000
or five years in prison, or both: if the
irl involved is under the age of 18, the
potential penalty is up to 510,000 and
imprisonment for up to ten ycars.

The first unfortunate fellow to bc
convicted under the Mann Act was a
Californian named Caminetti who took
a female friend to Reno with him for a
weekend. Alan Holmes commented on
this case in an article on the subject. in
pLaynoy (The Mann Act, РЕЛУВОХ, June

individual state
Federal law, com-

Миу of
s have in-

1959): "Clearly, it had not been the in-

tent of Congress to apply the Mann Act
to this kind of pec
to

llo — but in order
revise the law to conform to
purpose, some brave Congress-
would have had to propose an
mendment which would surely result
in his being tagged throughout the land
an advocate of sin. А Congressman
that brave was not to bc found at the
time, and none has appeared since.

"Appellate courts have consistently
ruled, therefore, that premarital inte
course comes under the heading of ‘any
other immoral purpose,’ even though
rt even illegal in many states — New
York for one. Thus, in that state it is
not illegal to crawl into the sack with a
girl, but serious crime to drive her
there from another state with the intei
tion of doing so.” Mr. Caminctti's weck-
end in Reno cost him a $1500 fine and
18 months in p

In his article for prAvnov, Holmes d.
bes the strange workings of t :
сїз suppose that you live in New Је
sey. One bright morning at the office
you spot a new addition to the staff: soft
auburn hair, cute lace, big wideset eyes
па a lovely pneumatic figure. 1t turns
out that she liv your town, too; she's
23 and a В.А. from Bennington. You
move in

из

оп.

5с

dinner and a pl Manhattan. You
pick her up on the appointed night and
you roll through the Lincoln Tunnel
nto the glittering world of midtown
ошат alter dark. You stuff her with
seafood coquille and fournedos at Le
Chanteclair and get her to the thean
just as the curtain rises. 5 so good.
But you really have no idea of how far
you can get with this girl. Being basically
а pessimist, you don't expect much mo
than a few kisses at her doorway, But as

the evening progresses, so do you; the
dear lide th

than

ng

y proves far friend
nd you end the even
Gramercy Park hotel.

xt day you discreetly describe the
girl's warm and affectionate nature to
your best buddy, who promptly decides
that he is just as dese Is you are.
He makes a date and takes her across
the Hudson, too, fully expecting to fol-
low in your fortunate footsteps, Alas, he
scores a goose cag: he leaves her at her
doorstep with the warm memory of a
sinceretype handshake to speed him on
his w
“A serious Federal offense has been
committed here. By you? Not at all. By
your friend, who could be dragged off to
the pe
$5000 to boot. He has viol
Act, though he got nothing but a
shake for his pains. You, who enjoyed
the fullest pleasure the lady had to olfer,
could not be booked for so much as jay-
walking. You arecompletely in the clear...

145

PLAYBOY

146 possibility of spending the night w

“The ‘crime’ the Act condemns is not
‘immorality.’ It is the transportation of
a woman with an immoral гтет. Once
you take her across a state line (with the
lurking thought that you may score), the
crime has been committed, no matter
what happens next—or doesn't happen.
Your friend broke the law because he
had an ‘immoral’ intent when he took
Miss Bennington through the Lincoln
Tunnel. You, not even considering the
possibility of making out (until after
the transportation was over), are in the
clea

Because it is transportation for an im-
moral purpose that the Iaw forbids, a
businessman was charged with a viola
tion of the Mann Act when, after a few
days’ vacation in Florida, he became
lonely and wired a girlfriend, with whom
he had had previous relations, to join
him there. His wire included the cost of
r transportation; she caught the next
flight to Miami Beach, and they spent
the rest of his vacation there together.
At vacation's end, they had a quarrel,
but being a gentleman he saw to it that
she was returned safely home. Subse-
quently, on her testimony, the man was
charged with and convicted of violating
the Mann Act.

Because the intent to commit an im-
moral act is all that is required, the man
could have been convicted of violating
the Mann Act even if the girl had re-
fused to је him in Florida. Even if he
had not paid for her transportation, he
could have been found guilty. because
ihe law specifies that to "induce" or
“entice” is suficient — thus, theoretically,
the mere invitation, with the expecta-
tion of sexual intimacy, would haye been
enough.

Holmes notes. “If you make arrange-
ments with a young lady to spend the
night nother state,
and you ге in separate
cars, at different times, you have never-
theless broken the law if you ‘persuaded,
induced, enticed, or coerced’ her to go.
(Money, incidentally, is readily recog-
nized as a powerful ‘persuader,’ etc) On
the other hand, if the whole thing was
her idea in the first place, there is no
violation. Nor can a woman be convicted
under the Mann Act for transporting
herself across a state line, though she can
bc held liable for transporting another
woman. There is no section in the Act
which makes it a Federal crime for either
a man or a woman to transport a man
across a state line for immoral purposes.”

For those unfortunate enough to live
n the District of Columbia, matters are
worse still. In our nation’s capital. you
don't even have to cross a state line to
violate the Act — all you have to do is
sport, with the necessary immoral i
tent, of course. “If you are taking your
girl home in a Washington

her fits through your mind,” observes
Holmes, “you have just violated the
Mann Act. И you walk her home, how-
ever, you're safe— but don't get gallant
and carry her into her apartment, (To be
really and truly sufe, you can do no bet-
ter than follow the dictum of the Court
of Appeals for the District of Columbia,
which recently held that ‘about the only
place where sexual intercourse can take
place without running athwart the local
law is in an anchored balloon.’)”

The most notorious prosecution under
the Mann Act was that of famous come-
dian Charlie Chaplin, when the Govern-
ment charged him with a violation for
taking а crosscountry train trip with
a comely young “protégéc”; she later
proved the wisdom of Congreve's 17th
Century adage about the fury of a woman
scorned when she became the state's star
witness against poor Charlie. He escaped
the Mann Act charges, but she nailed him
with a paternity suit, even though medi-
cal evidence, held inadmissible by the
court, proved. conclusively that he was
not the father of her child

A popular song of a few years back
musically endorsed the pleasures of “love
on a Greyhound bus.” Enjoyable they
may be, but if the bus crosses any state
lines, you'll be wise to get out and walk.

ADULTERY

In our society, adultery is generally
held to be a worse sin th fornica
tion. This is reflected іп our state
statutes which tend to treat this behav-
ог as a crime warranting more severe
punishment.

Adultery is forbidden in the Fen Com-
mandments, which play an important
part in both the Christian and Jewish
religions. It doesn't matter that the orig-
inal Judaic injunction against adultery
as primarily concerned with property
ights (when a wife was considered her
husband's possession); nor that the ad-
monition historically applied only to
women (it was not tho
in olden times for married men to h:
sexual intercourse with other than their
wives). "Ehe antisexualism of the Middle
Ages imbued adultery with its present
sexual significance and broadened its pro-
ition to include male and female alike
(though even today society is more tole
ant of the adulterous husband than wife).
s forbidding fornication and
adultery have no historical basis in com
mon ditionally this behavior
has been dealt with by the ecclesiastical
court; consistent with its origin
violation of property, however, common
law has permitted the innocent spouse
10 claim damages through civil action.
ly defined as illicit
sexual intercourse between two unmar-
ried individuals, but a legal definition of
adultery is not quite so simple. What
distinguishes adultery from fornication?

“The married state of one or both of the
partners in illicit coitus is the determin-
ing factor, but beyond that the defin
lv applied. Suppose a
ried man and a married woman were
to have intercourse with a single woman
and a single man; which of the [our
would be guilty of adultery and which
of fornication? Some would hold that all
four — married and unmarried — would
be adulterous, since one member of each
relationship was married; others would
consider that three of the four had
committed adultery — excluding ошу the
single female who had intercourse. with
the married man; still others would say
ti two of the four had committed
adultery, though they would not neces-
sarily agree on which two— some sug-
gesting that only the pair who were
married were guilty of adultery and
some stating that the married woman
and her lover were the adulterous ones;
and still others would argue that or
one of the four had committed adultery
— excluding all bur the married woman
Here we find a differentiation of defini
tion dependent not only upon the mari-
tal state, but also the sex of the
participants in illicit coitus — varied
viewpoints that have their origin, of
course, in the fact that prohibitions of
adultery originally applied only to mar-
ried women.

ma

On this confusion, Ploscowe writes,
“The Roman law, which influenced
much of our thinking on this question,

differentiated between the illicit sexual
itercourse of a married man and that
Of a married woman. A married man
might have sexual intercourse with а
and not bc guilty of
y other crime. A married
woman was guilty of adultery whenever
she had sexual intercourse with a man
who was not her husband, whether that
man was married to someone else or
was single. In such a case, both the mar-
ied woman and the paramour were
guilty of adultery.

“These Roman-law conceptions may
be encountered in common-law views on
adultery. While adultery was not gener
ally regarded as a crime at common law,
it might still be the subject of a civil

suit for damages. . . . If an Englishman
wanted a divorce, he had to bring an
action first for criminal conversation

based on the adultery of his wife. Only
à husband could bring such an action.
A wife could not sue another woman for
damages because the latter had made
love to her husband. Adultery was therc-
fore defined at common law as at Roman
Law; the sexual intercourse with another
man's wife was adultery.

"Many of our modern criminal statutes
on adultery arc interpreted in thc same
y, making sexual intercourse with an-
other man's wife adultery and sexual
intercourse by a married man with a

»gle woman fornication or no crime a
all. The justification for this distinc
tion between married men and married
women, with respect to extramarital se:
wal intercourse, has come down to us
from medieval times and is rciterated by
modern cases. For example, in the case
of State us. Armstrong, the court stated:
©... the gist of the crime, independently
of statutory enactments, is the danger of
introducing spurious heirs into a family,
whereby a man may be charged with the
maintenance of children not his own,
and the legitimate offspring be robbed
of their lawful inheritance. That an
offense which may entail such conse-
quences upon society is much more ag.
gravated in its nature than the simple
incontinence of a husband, few can
doubt...'"

But Ploscowe notes, "If this rationale
were adequate, sexual intercourse. with
a married woman who was unable to
bear children should not be adultery.
We have been unable to find any judi-
cial decision which makes such an ex-
ccption to the adultery statute,

“The English ecclesiastical law took an.
entirely different approach to adultery
than the Roman law. . . - Adultery was
defined by the ecclesiastical [court] as
“the inconstancy of married persons, a
arising out of the marriage relation,”
which was equally great whether the
offender was male or female . . .

This view of adultery was adopted by
the early American courts and has also
received statutory sanction in many
states. For example, in the Massachusetts
case of Commonwealth vs. Call, the de-
fendant, a married man, was found guilty
of having sexual intercourse with Eliza,
a single woman. Call contended that this
did not constitute adultery. The Massa-
chusetts Supreme Court decided, how-
ever, that this was adultery, stating in
its op "Whatever - . . may have
been the original meaning of the term
adultery, it is very obvious that we have
in this Commonwealth adopted the defi-
nition given to it by the ecclesiastical
courts. . . . We hold the infidelity of the
husband as well as that of the wife the
highly aggravated offense constituting
the crime of adultery.”

This religious interpretation of the
word is specifically adopted by a number
of state statutes; for example, the New

: “Adultery is the
sexual intercourse of two persons, either
of whom is married to a third person.”
Under this type of statute, both the man.
and the woman are guilty of adultery,
even if only one of the parties (cither
one) is married.

"There are other states, however, which.
hold husbands and wives to the same
standards of sexual fidelity, but make
distinctions between the guilt of the
single partner in illicit intercourse and
the married one. In these statutes, the

York Penal Law read:

“So with the power vested in me, 1 pronounce us..

single parmer is deemed guilty of forni-
cation and the married one is declared.
guilty of adultery.

Ploscowe adds this postscript, which
helps underscorc the earlier Roman defi
nition of adultery as a crime involving.
married women: "At the end of 1961, it
is interesting to note, the High Consti
tutional Court of Italy, the country's
highest tribunal, upheld a provision of
the penal code enacted 30 years pre
ously, under which a wife faces up to
two years in jail if found guilty of adult-
ery. . .. Under the law, however, a hus-
band cannot be punished at all for
simple adultery."

But whichever definition we apply to
the term, the Kinsey studies of our
sexual behavior make abundantly clear
that all of the combined church and
state prohibitions have been notably
unsuccessful in suppressing adultery i
America. Kinsey’s statistics on extra-
marital sexual intercourse include only
the incidences of схи i coitus
of married adults; the coital experiences
of the partners in these relationships,
when the partners are themselves single,
appear in the studies as part of the pre-
marital and postmarital calculation
even though this behavior is legally
termed adultery by a number of the
states. If these additional statistics were
added to those that follow, the incidences
for adultery would be, of course, much
doser to those of other nonmarital in-
tercourse.

Kinsey's research indicates that ap-
proximately 50 percent of all married
males have intercourse with women other
than their wives at some time while they
are married. Kinsey and his associates
found a higher degree of coverup and
reluctance to supply answers on ques-
tions related to extramarital sexual e:
perience than was evidenced in any
other part of their studies. The 50-per-

cent figure is therefore considered
minimum one and the real figure is
probably somewhat higher. Nearly three
quarters (72 percent) of the married
males in a study conducted by Terma
in 1058 expressed an interest in extr:
marital relations, and. Kinsey's extensive
study revealed a "similarly high propor-
tion” who expressed such desires. The
gap between the desire for such ex-
perience and actual bchavior must be
viewed as the result of the strong taboos
placed upon adultery in our society and
on lack of opportunity.

As with premarital sex, educational
and social backgrounds play an impor-
tant role in determining the frequency
and form of extramarital sexual activity.
Married men of grade- and high-school
education tend to have more extramar-
ital coitus in the early years of marriage,
but the incidence tapers off sharply with
older married men; conversely, males
with a college education tend to have
fewer extramarital experiences in their
first years of marriage, increasing the
number of such relations in later years.
"The increasing incidence of extramarital
coitus for married males with a college
background can be understood as result-
ing from a lessening of the greater sexual
inhibitions evidenced in early life by
upperlevel males; Kinsey is unable to
offer any similar explanation for the
reverse trend in lowerlevel married
males, however.

For most men, at every social level,
extramarital intercourse is usually spor-
adic, occurring on an occasion or two
with one female, a few times with the
next partner, not happening again for
some months or a year or two, but then
occurring several times, or every night,
for a week or even for a month or more,
after which the particular affair 15 ab-
ruptly ended. Kinsey reports, “There are
extreme instances ol younger males whose

147

PLAYBOY

148

orgasms, achieved in extramarital rela
tions, have averaged as many as 18 per
week for periods of as long as five years;
but these are unusual cases. Lowerlevel
males are the ones who are most likely
to have more regularly distributed expe-
rience, often with some variety of females.
Among males of the college level, extra
marital relations are almost always infre-
quent, often with not more than one or
two or a very few partners in all of their
lives, and usually with a single partner
over a period of some time —in some
cases for a number of years.”

In the study of the U.S. female,
26 percent admitted extramarital inter-
course; among women with a college
education, the incidence is somewhat
higher, amounting to 29 percent. Here
again, the cover-up evidenced in this
portion of the studies suggests that the
iue percentages are somewhat higher
than those reported.

For both the male and female, there
are few types of sexual activity which
occur more irregularly than extramarital

1
der to avoid volver
which might seriously endanger th.
marriages.

It is interesting to note that Kinsey
found nearly half of the women who ad-
mitted to extramarital intercourse stated
that their husbands either knew about it
(40 percent) or suspected it (9 percent).

There are a variety of psychological
and emotional, as well as some physical
causes for extramarital intercourse in
both sexes. We will not attempt, at this
point, to evaluate the effect that extra-
marital sex may have upon a marriage
relationship, though obviously the effect
is far more dependent upon the attitudes
of the persons involved than on the
sexual activity itself, The only point to
be emphasized here is that these prob-
lems are personal ones and should re-
main the private business of the people
involved; they are not the proper bu:
ness of our Government.

Nevertheless, 45 of the 50 states (ex-
cluding only Arkansas, California, Lou-
siana, New Mexico and Tennessce)
have specific statutes prohibiting adul-
tery. These laws are, in gene more
severe than those for fornication, and
range from a $10 fine in Maryland to a
maximum penalty of $1000 or five years’
imprisonment in Maine; Arizona, Idaho,
Iowa, Massachusetts, New Hampshire,
New Jersey and Wisconsin all have
statutes with a maximum prison sentence
of three years for conviction of adulter:
in Michigan it is four years: in Coi
necticut, Maine, Oklahoma, South
Dakota and Vermont, it is five.

Seventeen states have the same penalty

for adultery as they do for fornication;
Florida has a $300 or 90-day maximum
for for nd a $500 or two-year
maximum for adultery, however, and Ili-
nois a $200 and six-month maximum for
fornication, with $500 and one year for
adultery; in Nebraska the maximum pen-
alty for fornication is$100 and six months,
while conviction on a charge of adultery
bring imprisonment of up to a year;
in Wisconsin fornication may bring $200
and six months, while adultery may be
good for $1000 and three years.
Arizona, Delaware, Тома, Maryland,
New York, Okla Vermont and
Washington have no law against forni-
cation, but do have statutes prohibiting
adultery; no state has а law against
fornication, but no law for adultery,
though several have laws for neither, but
prohibit illegal cohabitation (Arkansas,
Loui: New Mexico) as we com-
mented carlicr, only Са
Tennessee have no statutes prohibiting
ny of the three.
AL is the only state in which the
penalty for fornication (maximum of
$500 or two years or both) is greater
than for adultery (maximum of $200 or
js). presumably because the Al

ation

oma,

prol

adultery per
— $30 to $100 or three to twelve months
or both for men: $10 to $30 or one to
three months for women. Hawaii is
doubly unique among the states in that
the greater penalty applies to the male,
whereas society is generally more severe
with women for such behavior (as ex-
emplified by the two years’ imprisonment
for women for adultery in Italy, with no
comparable penalty for men).

A study of the statutes of the various
states affords us only a portion of the
tue picture of things, of course, since
many Jaws exist that are not actively
enforced. These sex statutes are, in fact,
among the least enforced and least
enforceable of any in existence in these
United States. During the fiscal year of
July 1959 through June 1960 in New
York, for example, 1700 divorces were
granted in New York City on grounds of
nalysis of the Annual
Report of the Police Department for the
same period fails to disclose a single
arrest for the crime, which is punishable
in New York with a fine of up to 5250 or
six months in jail or both. The same
lence of adultery that is legally a
ceptable for the granting of a divorce is
arely then applied to a criminal prose-
cution for the activity.

However, some arrests and convictions
for fornication and adultery do take
place. For the year 1960, for example,
the following typical municipal arrests
for adultery were reported: Baltimore,
two (both dismissed); Dallas, ten: Seattle,

31 (adultery and fornication). In 1959,
Boston reported that two males and 17
females had been arrested and com-
mitted to the city prison for adultery:
ten cases of fornication were similarly
dealt with. Philadelphia reported the
arrest of three adulterers.

The arbitrary and often capricious
manner in which these laws are enforced
constitutes a serious problem for the na-
tion. By making the sexual behavior of
the majority of adults illegal, these laws
breed contempt for all law, and the
of their being so widcly unenforced in-
duces disrespect for all law enforcement,
n much the same way that Prohibition
did in the Twenties. In addition, their
existence permits them to be used b:
the unscrupulous for purposes of intimi:
dation and blackmail.

Dr. Alfred Kinsey states, in Sexual
Behavior in the Human Female: “The
current sex laws are unenforced and are
unenforceable because they are too com-
pletely out of accord with the realities of
human behavior, and because they at-
tempt too much in the way of social
control. Such a high proportion of the fe-
males and males in our population is in-
volved in sexual activities which are
prohibited by the law of most of the
states of the Union, that it is inconcei
ble that the present laws could be ad-
ministered in any fashion that even
remotely approached systematic and com-
plete enforcement. . . . The consequently
capricious enforcement which these laws
now receive offers an opportunity for
maladministration, for police and politi-
al graft, and for blackmail which is
regularly imposed both by underworld
groups and by the police themselves . . ."

Finally, these sex statutes stand as
mute evidence of the extent to which we
e failed to live up to the ideal of
free and separate church and state
America.

In the next installment of “The Play-
boy Philosophy,” Editor Publisher Hugh
M. Hefner will continue his comparison
of U.S. sex laws and behavior with a con-
sideration of the statutes on sodomy, or
what is termed “the abominable and de-
testable crimes against nature,” covering
all the so-called “perversions,” which in-
clude almost систу form of sexual activity
other than coitus — for married and un-
married. alike.

See “The Playboy Forum" in this issue
for veaders comments — pro and. con —
on subjects raised in previous install-
ments of this editorial series.

Two booklet reprints of “The Playboy
Philosophy" — the first including install-
ments one through seven and the second,
installments eight through twelve — are
available at $1 per booklet. Send check
or money order to PLAYBOY, 232 E. Ohio
Street, Chicago, Illinois 60611.

PLAYBOY FORUM
(continued. from. page 43)

ably would, that explosion would
dwindle to a phíft, There wouldn't be
anyone around 150 years from now.

God didn't goof when He put the
pleasure in sex, God knew that the
human animal wouldn't do anything
willingly that he didn't enjoy and if he
didn’t enjoy sex, we would not have
survived the first generation. There are
many things in life that are pleasurable,
but if we indulged in pleasure indiscrim-
inately, it wouldn't be long before we
found out what real suffering is.

Sex is not only enjoyable, it
beautiful — under the right conditions.
Jt must be entered into without any

fear or frustrations. Ir must not have
the taint of guilt or dirt connected with

it. Any extramarital sex has the fear of
being found out, the fear of possible
offspring, the fear of disease. The right
kind of sex is beautiful. The wrong kind
is dirty.

To follow your lead of pleasure, for
pleasure's sake, would lead to a society
where everyone spent their time in bed
and no one worked. It would end ma
riage and family life. Free love is
name for it. No love is more fitting.
You can't go from one bedroom to an-
other and maint a love for a
but yourself.

In short, you are
lieved of your moral respo:
allowed to gratify your animal instincts.
You want to lead a dog's life.

As for me, 1 am a creation of God. T
am above the lower animal and although
I have the basi nimal ncts, d
gave me a mind and а will to usc. The
Ten Commandments are still the moral
1 though mankind has
flubbed in passing many of his legal
laws.

If you repeal the law “Thou shalt not
commit adultery,” then how about
“Thou shalt not kill,” “Thou shalt not
steal” and “Thou shalt not covet thy
ighbors wife.” Yeah, how about that!
She's a real looker!! Let's repeal them
all. They'll be broken anyway and I
mean, hell, man, let's really live it up!

Remembe п got kicked out of the
Garden of Eden. Are you trying to start
one of your own?

Bob Barrett
Vestal, New York
A society that esteemed season rather
than superstition might well turn out to
be a veritable Garden of Eden. At any
rale, it would go a long way toward
ending the suffering produced by an i
ralional society that continues to place
unnecessary pain and frustration above
happiness and fulfillment,
We do not favor “free lowe” or any
blind or irrational pursuit of pleasure
—we have never suggested a pattern. of

behavior based on the premise: Live for
the moment and let tomorrow take care
of itself. We have proposed a philosophy
for living, rather, that places its empha-
sis on both today and tomorrow,

We do not advocate sex as simply a
sport and we do not believe that any
human conduct should be removed from
its consequences. A more enlightened
code of sexual ethics would, of cours
produce neither a population explosion
nor, with the intelligent use of contra-
ceptives, a dwindling or disappearance
of the race.

We agree that sex can be both enjoy-
able and beautiful, but the suggestion
that all sex outside of marriage is ugly
and hot enjoyable is absurd, and as un-
reasoned as would be the suggestion that
all sex inside of marriage is joyful and
beautiful. Not all sex without the mar-
ried state is filled with fear and guilt
and it is the feelings of fear and guilt
associated with sex that we oppose —
whether in or out of marriage; human
morality should be based on something
less coercive than that —and it is our
contention that it should be based upon
reason.

It seems irrational, to us, to reduce
the marriage contract to a license to in-
dulge in sex. Marriage should be an in-
tellectual, emotional and moral bond
between two individuals and have most
often, as one oj its satisfactions, the care
and raising of children. Marriage, and
especially marriage involving children,
entails serious responsibilities. But these
responsibilities, 100, il seems to us,
should be reasoned and reasonable.

Underlying the whole of your argu-
ment is a moral belief that has come
from Judaco-Christian teaching which,
as was pointed out in the August and
September installments of “The Playboy
Philosophy,” is based more upon the
antisexualism of the medieval Church
and Calvinist puritanism than on the
original teachings of either Christianity
or Judaism.

But apart [rom that, in our free soci-
ety, the Ten Commandments are not
the moral law of the land — they are the
moral law for that segment of society
that freely accepts them as moral law.
Such religiously inspired morality is
based largely upon faith; our civil law,
by contrast, should be based solely upon
reason. Few would suggest that profan-
ity be made illegal simply because it
breaks one of the Ten Commandments;
similarly, theft and murder are against
the law, not because they ате also in-
cluded in the Ten Commandments, but
because a rational society is interested
im protecting the lije and property of
its citizens.

Our religious beliefs should inspire us
to live better, fuller lives, but it would
be a sad, stultifying, totalitarian society
if religion ceased to be a matter of free

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PLAYBOY

150

choice for the individual and became an
impersonal obligation dictated by the
state. Society would no longer be free
and the true meaning of religion would
be lost and its values subverted.

The United States is a predominantly
Christian nation, and we have a right to
be proud of the greatest part of our
Christian heritage. Christians have no
right, however, to force their faith, or
their morality, on the rest of society.
James Madison observed, in effect, “If
you make laws to force people to speak
the words of Christianity, it won't be
long until the same power will narrow
the sole religion to the most powerful
sect in it.”

COMING OF AGE

Your magazine, while under the guise
of a chronicle for the moderi
phisticate, is still essentially a "оте
magazine that has been colorfully and
smoothly adapted to the more mature
taste of our contemporary society. There-
fore, your youthful publishers attempt
то out-philosophize some of the greatest
philosophers of the past few thousand

years (Aquinas, Augustine, Damiani and
Bernard, etc.) borders on the ludicrous.
You, in effect, are contradicting an ear-
lier objective of lighthearted and spicy
humor by wandering in philosophical
fields far beyond your realm.
J- Drummey
Arlington, Virginia
One has to be neither dead nor a
noled philosopher to have a philosophy.
We all have a philosophy or outlook on
life — it may be covert or we may be able
to express it in glowing rhetoric, but we
still possess it. Of course, PLAYBOY has
matured, expanded its horizons and
added dimensions — this is all part of a
growth process, normal to humans or
magazines. Not to grow is to diminish.
The contention that a zest for life pre-
cludes serious thoughts about it is a
result of some one-dimensional thinking
on your part. And if you have some
serious objection to girls, that's your
problem, not ours.

SPOKESMAN
The Playboy Philosophy puts your
magazine on a higher level than ever. If

“Come, come, J. R. You must have some idea about
what went on at the Christmas party!”

only more of us would have the fortitude
to speak up and not slowly simmer in un-
happy conformity! I enjoyed the most re-
cent Philosophy better t i

for other Americans who are too fright-
ened to advocate such a common-sense

philosophy as you have giv
Dick Record
Sharon, Pennsylvani

A FOGGY DAY

Thank you for publishing The Play-
boy Philosophy. Perhaps it will help to
remove the fog of sham, hypocrisy and
self-deception that covers large portions
of our country today, to the amusement
of much of the rest of the world. Trans-
lations of the Philosophy into European
and Oriental languages. and world-wide
distribution, could do much to dispel the
prevalent Babbitt image so successfully
inculcated by the Neanderthal mentality
which occupies such a large acteage of
public office.

I believe that the removal of this fog
is essential to the achievement of racial
harmony. Until much of the white com-
munity rids itself of false values, falscly
ascribed, it will not be able to under-
stand, nor to communicate with, those
whose view of life is not blinded by
glittering nonessentials, nor deceived
by cuphemisms.

Edwin J. Helfand
Forest Hills, New York

Your editorials on the subject of
rAYBOY's philosophy have been more
than illuminating — they have given your
readers evidence of the spark of intellec-
tual and social freedom that is beginning
to shine through a fog of hopeless con-
formity, America has broken, at last, out
of the shell of “moral” (immoral) restric-
tions and begun to express itself as a
mind, body and soul, uninhibited. So, we
find motion pictures, novels and a m;
zine following and critically examin’
the goals of the New Revolution, As with
any struggle of this kind, some of the
rebellion is directed at rejecting, even
destroying, society. It is clear to me, how-
ever, that the leaders in this movement —
like yourselves — desire to improve rather
than to irrationally reject life.

James Willems
San Diego State College
San Diego, California

“The Playboy Forum" offers the oppor-
tunity for an extended dialog between
readers and editors of this publication
on subjects and issues raised in our con-
tinuing editorial series, “The Playboy
Philosophy." Address all correspondence.
on either the “Philosophy” or the
“Forum” to: The Playboy Forum,
PLAYBOY, 232 E, Ohio Street, Chicago,
Illinois 60611.

а

BIFFEN'S MILLIONS (continued from page 82)

brown hair, brown suit, brown shoes.
Longish nose and not much chin. Just
like a dachshund.”

“I see. And his frame of mind. Has he
been in good spirits?”

“Excellent.”

Any financial worries?”

‘At the moment, rather fewer than
usual, as 2 matter of fact. That godfather
I spoke of died recently in New York,
leaving millions, and Biff has an idea
he may be in line for a small legacy. He
says it's the least the man could do after
getting him christened Edmund.’

The secretary coughed.

“You feel, then,” he said delicately,
“that we can rule out suicide as a possi-
bilit
Good heavens, yes. Bill wouldn't kill
himself with a tenfoot pole. Not so
long as there was a blonde left in the
world."

“He is fond of blondes?"

“They're his lifework. The feat that
haunts me is that he may have gone off
and married one. I wouldn't put it past
him. Still, one must hope for the best.

“Precisely, mademoiselle. It is the only
way. Well, 1 do not think there are any
further questions that I necd to ask.
Will you please go now and repeat to
the sergeant what you have bcen telling
me?”

“Must I? Couldn't we keep it just be-
tween us two?’

“It is the official procedure. No, not
through that door. That is reserved for
the commissaire, the sergeant and my-
self. You go out and enter through the
door leading from the street.”

The sergeant came back to Jerry. His
r was that of a diplomat who has solved
which has been worrying the

n order,” he said. "I have
covered myself.”

"Thank heaven for that," said Jerry.
"Do you know, I had a feeling you
would. There goes a man, I said to my-
self when you went out, who is going
to cover himself.”

“The commissaire's secretary assured
me that there is no objection to doing
what you suggest. There you are,” said
the sergeant some long minutes later as
he slowly finished writing, slowly read
through what he had written and slowly
passed it across the desk. “Sign, please.
Hard, for the carbons. Thank you.”

He stamped the paper, put it on top
of the pile already stamped, opened the
drawer in which he had placed the wal-
let, took out the wallet, took 20 francs
from it, replaced it in the drawer, locked
the drawer.
sow everything is in order,” he said.
“Here is a copy of your statement. The
top copy and one carbon are reserved

for the files."

He seemed to consider the affair
closed, and Jerry was obliged to point
out that there still remained something
to be done.

"But you haven't given me my wallet."

A faint smile passed over the ser-
geants face. How little, he was feeling,
the public knew about official procedure.

“You will call for that in three days’
time at the Lost Property Office, 36 Rue
des Morillons," he said with the genial
air of one imparting good news.

“Three days! But I'm leaving for Eng-
land tomorrow!"

“I remember, yes, you told me, did
you not?”

“Then where am I going to sleep to-
night"
Ah," said the sergeant, seeming to
admit that he had a point there.

He began stamping papers ag:

Kay had decided not to see the ser-
geant. The brief glimpse she had had
of him in the secretary's office had left
her with the feeling that he was a man
from whose conversation little при
entertainment were to be deri
was wrong, of course, for he could have
told her some good things about key
bits, but she did not know that. She took
up her stand in the street outside his
door, hoping that he would cut his in-
terview with Jerry reasonably short.

She had pleasant memories of Jerry
and the prospect of meeting him again.
delighted her. Shipboard friendships arc
not as a rule durable, but theirs had
lingered in her mind with an odd tenac-
ity these past two years. It was with
bright anticipation that she awaited the
coming reunion.

When at length he appeared, he was

tottering a little, His eyes were wild, his
limbs twitched and he was breathing
heavily. A hart panting for cooling

streams when heated in the chase, had
one happened to come along at the
moment, would have shaken his hand
and slapped him on the
ing him immediately as a
and a member of its lodge.

Kay hailed him with enthusiasm.

“Hello there, Jerry.” she cried. “A
hearty greeting to you, Zoosmeet.”

He raised a hand in a passionate ges-
turc.

‘Are you going in to sce the sergeant:
he asked hoarsely. "Don't do it. That way
madness 1 He broke off, peering at
her in the blue light cast from above
by the police lamp. “What was that
you said?” He drew a step closer
Lord!” he exclaimed. allowing his e

ood:

to bulge in the manner popularized by
snails.
Until she had spoken, he had scen in

her merely а misty, indistinct female fig-

ure hovering on the brink of the fate
that is worse than death— viz, being
closeted with a police sergeant whose
conversational methods reduced even
strong men to shells of their former
selves, and his only thought had been to
save her before it was too late. He was
able now to perceive that this was no
stranger but an old crony with whom he
had walked on boat decks in the moon-
light and shuffleboarded on sunny after-
noons; with whom, side by side on
djoining deck chairs, he had sat and
sipped the I-o'clock soup.
“Good Lord!" he d. "You!
А word I never like,” said K
ple say it when they're stalling for time,
trying to remember your name."

“You don't think Гуе forgotten your
name!”

“I don’t know why you shouldn't
have, considering that its two years
since we met and then, after five days
on that boat, we never saw each other
again. When we parted at Cherbourg,
I remember you said we must keep in
touch. But you didn't kcep in touch."

"How could I? You were in Paris, and
I was tied up with my job in London."
Tm glad you got a job all right. You
were rather worried on the boat about
being one of the unemployed. But you
could have written."

“I didn't know your address.”

And I didn't know yours."

What is your address?”

xtcen Rue Jacob. Look in some-
time, why don't you?"

ve got to bc back in London to-
morrow.”

“Golly, we are ships that pass in the
night, aren't we? When do you expect to
be in Paris again?

“Not for another year."

"That's too bad. I was hoping we'd
sec something of cach other. Well, how
are you after all these long years, Jerry?
с and dandy?”

‘es. At least, no."

"Make up your mind."

"I'm fine and dandy now, but before
aw you I was feeling extremely blue.”
And. oddly enough, youre looking
extremely blue. I suppose it's that police
lamp. Why don't we go somewhere and
cup of coffee? No sense in stand-
ing in this drafty street.”

Jerry sighed. Situated as he w.
cheapest cup was beyond his means.

“There's nothing I'd like better. But
I couldn't pay for it.”

"Why, didn't you get your wallet
back?”

Jerry laughed bitterly. The old wound
throbbing.

If you knew the sergeant, you
wouldn't ask that. You don't get things
ack when he has got ahold of them.
But how did you know I had lost my
wallet?”

1 was chatting with the secretary next

the

151

PLAYBOY

door, and the sarge blew in and told
all"

Ah, so you've met the sergeant. I'm
glad of that, because if you hadn't, it
might have been difficult to make you
understand, He's not easy to explain to
the lay mind. Yes, he's got the wallet and
refuses to give it up. I don't get it till
1 call at the Lost Property Office three
days from now.”

hats the French for you. What was

“АП my money and the keys to the
tment where Т was staying

спе. Very snug, 100, if you can get past
the [ront door. This, however, I am un-
fortunately unable to do. So colfec's out,
Em afraid.

“Nonsense. TIl pick up the tal

The pride of the Shoesmiths ha
always been high, and in normal cir-
cumstances Jerry would never have per-

mitted a member of the other sex to pay
for his refreshment, but this was a
special case. After half an hour with the

sergeant he needed fortifying.
“You will?” he said савету, the aroma

of collec sceming to play about his nos-

uils. “It wouldn't run to a drop of

brandy as well, would it?"

"Sure. No stint.

ГЇЇ reimburse vou when I get back

10 civilization
“Don't give it a

thought. This is my

good of you.”
Ш. Be my guest."

The bistro they found in the next
street was of the humble zinccounta
nd-imitation-marble-tables type and
rather fuller than he could have wished
of taxi drivers and men who looked as
if they were taking a coffee break after
а spell of work in the sewers, but to
Jerry it seemed an abode of luxury, what
Kubla Khan would have called a stately
pleasure dome. As he seated himself in a
chair even harder than the one provided
for his clients by the sergeant, a thrill of
gratitude to the founder of the feast set
him tingling.

Tell me,

he s

l, when the coffee
arrived accompanied by what at first
taste seemed to be carbolic acid, but
which actually was brandy or something
reasonably like it, "vou were saying you
had been in conference with the secre-
Guy. What was the wouble? Had vou
lost someth
Odd stuff, this," said Kay, sipping.
"Probably used for taking stains out of
serge suits. Still, i
ity. Lost someth
bet 1 have. I've lo:
Jerry stared.
“Bill? You me

You

n Biff? Your brother

n my life, and.

ouly one 1

g to say that’s plenty, I'm
percent, He's dis-
shed into thin air. Gor
d been gone two days."
“Good heavens! You must be worried.”
ot particularly, He'll be back when
the spirit moves him. He's probably just
olf on a toot somewhere," said Kay with
sisterly candor, and Jerry, too, felt that
this must be the solution of the prodi-
gas absence. In his New York corre-
spondent days he had seen a great deal
of Bill and had come to love him like
a brother, but he was not blind to his
le was the adjective

n one con-

if уоште goi
th you a hundr
appeared. V.
without a cry

that spr
templated
“Bill ways by way of bei
ter of the revels.
“He still is.”
“Living in Par

“He ought to get married.”

“If there exists a woma
coping with him. There can't be many of
that bulldog breed around. 1 thought
he'd found one a year ago, а girl called
inda Rome. She would have been just
ht for him — one of tho: im, quiet,
nsi ble girls with high standards of be-
w and
have kept him in o
olf the engagement.”

“Why was that

“Because she was so
pose. Much

recommend 1

sible, T sup-
as I love Biff, I wouldn't
as a husband to any girl

who hadn't had experience prison
wardress and wasn't a trainer of per-
forming fleis on the side. He would

drive the ordinary young bride crackers.
Linda would have taken him in h:
and reformed him. and
pity she didn't see her way to going
through with it. But let's not talk about
Bifl, let's take a look at your position.
don't sec how one can avoid the conclu-

sion that you're in something of a spot.
How are you going to get back to Lon-

don, il you haven't any money
“That parts all right. I have my pass-
port and my return ticket"

"But you cant get into your apart-
ment and you can't go to a how

wi

сте are you going to sleep tonight?
Have you given any thought to that"

"Quite a good deal. 1 suppose I shall
ve to сатр out in the Bois or on a
bench somewhe
"Oh, we must try to do better than
t. Don't talk for a minute, | want to
think."

She became silent, and Jerry watched
her over his cup, not with any real hope,
for he knew the problem was insoluble,
but because watching her scemed to
isfy some deep need in his spiritua
make-up. He would have been content
10 sit watching her forever.

"I've got it," she said.

A wave of emotion poured over Jerry.

One of those loud French quarrels had
broken out between two of the y
drivers and the air was vibrant with
charges and countercharges, but he hardly
heard them. He was stunned by the dis-
covery that in addition to bcing the love-
liest thing that ever played deck tennis
or drank I1-o'clock soup she had a brain
that even the deepest thinker might envy.
He was conscious of an odd sensation
similar to the one experienced by the
character in the poem who on honeydew
had fed aud drunk the milk of paradise,
and he did not need the heart expert of
y of the many London periodicals that
nt in for heart experts to tell him
this meant. He was in a position to
state without fear of contradiction that
here beside him sat the girl he had been
searching for all his adult life. There was
something about her personality — the
way she looked, the way her bright h
curled up at the sides of her little hat.
the way she drank collee and the way the
mere sound of her ve
and stirred onc up

with a swizzle stick
— that made the thought of leaving her

and pining away with the Channel sep:
ting them the most nauseating he had
need. He leaned forward im-
pulsively, spilling a good deal of collec,
and was about to put these sentiments
into words, to give her what at Tilbury
House, where he worked, they called the
over-all picture, when she spoke.

“I know where you can sleep. At
Henry

“Who's Henry?”

“Henry Blake-Somerset. He's in thc
British Embassy. He'll put you up. It
isn't far from here. If you've finished
spilling coffec, let's go.”

If Henry Blake-Somerset, enjoying а
weak whiskey and water in his apart-
ment preparatory to going to bed, had
been asked by some inquiring reporter
t was the last thing he wanted at
te hour, he would almost certainly
have specified the intrusion on his priv-
acy by a perfect stranger anxious to be
accommodated with lodging for thc
night. He was tired and ruffled. He had
had one of those uying days that come
to all minor members of corps diploma-
tiques from time to time, the sort of day
when everything goes wrong and the
senior members expend their venom on
the junior members, who, having no
members junior to themselves to whom to
pass the buck, are compelled to suffer in
lence. His manner, consequently, when
he opened the door to Kay's ring, had
nothing in it of the jolly innkeeper of
old-fashioned comic ope He looked
more like Macbeth sceing a couple of
Banquos.

“Hello, Hank.” said Kay in her brisk
way. "You weren't asleep, were you?”

“I was about to go to bed,” said Henry,
and his tone was stiff.

“Just what Jerry here wants to do, and
I've brought him along to seek shelter.
He's in sore straits. Oh, by the way, Mr.
Shoesmith, Mr. Blake-Somerset.”

"How do you do?” said Jerry effu-
sively.

"How do you do?” said Henry, less
effusively.
Mr. Shoesmith, 1 should mention
said Kay. "is passing for the moment
under the alias of Zoosmeet, but think.
none the worse of him for that. It's his
only way of getting the secret papers
through to the Prime Minister. Where
was 12 Oh yes, sore swaits. Tell him the
story of vour life, Jerry.”

Jerry embarked on hi
not with any marked c
he seemed to detect in his host's eye a
certain imperfect sympathy, Henry
Blake-Somerset was a small and slender

but
for

young man of singular but frosty good
looks. He had what Jerry had once seen

described
gance. His hair was light . his
istocratically arched, his lips th

a rising
ll about

believe it. Here, obviously, w:
young diplomat who knew
protocol
i triplicate and could put foreign spies
in their places with a lifted eyebrow.
The thought crossed his mind Фаг if
called upon to select a companion for a
long walking tour, Henry В omerset
would be his choice only after he had
scraped the barrel to its fullest extent.
Against this. howe must be set the
fact that he had a bed to dispose of, and
that made up for everything

"So you see,” said Kay, as he con-
cluded the story of the lost walle he's
like the dove they sent out of the ark,
which could find no resting place. and
you don't do your boy-scout act of kind-
ness, he'll be in what you embassy guys
call a rapidly deteriorating situation.
You can put him in your spare room,”

she said, and Henry, with a notable lack
of а aid yes, he supposed he
could.

"Of course you can," said Kay. “There
it is, eating its head off. Well, I'll leave
you to fix him up. Goodnight, Hank.
Goodnight, Jerry. Ш I'm to give my
employers of my best tomorow, I must.
go and get some sleep.”

Her departure was followed by a long-
lent because ће

abject of English-
Чез. he resented
thrust on him
nselt, he would
have finished his whiskey and water,
wound up his watch, shed his teeth,
gargled a little mouthwash and turned

men's homes and
haying perfect stra

nge
like suay dogs. Left to hi

in between the sheets, all set for the
refreshing slumber which would enable
him to be bright and competent at the
embassy tomorrow. And now this! He
did not actually glare at Jerry, but his
manner could not have been more dis-
tant if the latter had been a heavily
veiled woman, diffusing a strange exoti
scent, whom he had found helping her-
self to top-secret documents out of the
embassy safe.

However, he was — though unwillingly
—a host.

"Can 1 offer you a drink, Mr. $
smith?” he said gloomily.

“Thanks,” said Jerry,
regretted the word. This, hc r
would mean conversatioi
not feeling in the vein for convers
Love had come to him this night, and he
wanted to be alone with his thoughts,
not to have to exchange small talk with
a п who was making so obvious his

distaste for his interior organs. “I feel
id apologetically, "intrud-

hoe-

awful," he
ing on you like thi

“Not at all,” said Henry, though with
r of one who would have preferred
well ought to."
key and wa
glad to be of help,” he said, spe
ing not perhaps actually from between
clenched teeth but certainly the next
g to it.

sip of whi

“1 was all set to camp out in the Bois,
whei

Miss Christopher had this sudden
p; you to put me up.
said Henry, his tone indi-
cating only too clearly what he thought
of Kay's sudden inspirations. "Are vou
an old friend of hei

“Hardly th:

aid Jerry, wishing not
for the first time that his host's eyes were
a little less pale and icy or, tively,
that if they had to be pale and icy. their
proprietor would not d him
with such unpleasant intensity, for thc
young diplomat was making him fecl
like an unwanted ant at a picnic. "We
were on the same boat coming over from
New York two y

nd saw some-

thing of each other then. I met her again
tonight at the police station."

“What was she doing there?”
k the police to
have

he had gone to
find her brother. He
disappeared,"

If it is possible to 4
wat

seems to

nk whi
r with a sneer, Henry did so.
Probably olf on a d

“That was Miss Christopher's theory.

“The correct one, 1 imagine:

“I'm very fond of him myself.”

“You know him?”

“Oh, very well.”

“I understood that you and МЕ
topher were mere acquaintances.

"The expression revolted Jerry, but he
supposed that—so far—it more or less
fitted the facts.

"We ar

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153

PLAYBOY

"Yet you appear to be closely con-
nected with the family.”

“I saw а lot of Biff in New York. He
was a reporter on a paper there, and I
was the New York correspondent of a
London paper. I went around with
all the time.”

"With Miss Christopher also?”
"No, I never met her when I was in
New York. I think she was out on the
Coast. Why do you ask?”

“Oh, no particular reason. I just
thought that you and she seemed on
excellent terms. I noticed that she called
you by your first name."

"Don't most girls drop the Mister

airly soon nowadays?”

Do thcy? I could not say."

‘They do with me. I suppose they find
"Mister Shoesmith’ a bit of a tongue
twister. 1 doubt if you could say it ten
times quickly.”

Henry Blake Somerset apparently had
no intention of trying. He took an aus-
tere sip of whiskey and water and was
silent for so long that Jerry wondered if
he had gone to sleep.

"So you and Miss Christopher were
just shipboard acquaintances,” he said,
coming abruptly out of his reverie, and
once more Jerry found the description
distasteful. “I thought it possible that
you might have been seeing her since.

"Oh, пол

"You have not happened to meet her
during your stay in Pari
Хо."

"Ihe boat trip took how long?"
“Five

"And she calls you by your first пате!”

Jerry became a little irritated,

“Well, she calls you by your first
name.”

"That" said Henry, rising, "is no
doubt because we are engaged to be
married. Will you excuse me now if 1
turn in. We Keep early hours at the
embassy.”

His statement that the embassy staff
expected to clock in at an early
hour proved next morning to have been
strictly accurate. When Jerry woke, he
found himself alone. And he was just
ting down to breakfast when the tele-
phone rang.
Kay's voice came over the wire.

"Couldn't be better, because you're the
one | want to talk to. Have you had
breakfast

“Just hay

“Don't spare the marmalade. It's good.
Hank has it imported from Scotland.
Listen, what I'm calling about: I've had
a telegram from Biff.”

“You have? Where is he

"Over in London, staying at Barri-

154 bault’s Hotel. As if he could afford а

place like that, the misguided young
cuckoo. Could you find time to go and
sce him when you get back?"

“Of course,”

“Ask him what he thinks he's playing
at, going off without a word. Tell him
Tve been distracted. with anxiety and
am under sed h an ice pack
on my head. Talk to him like a Dutch
unde and grind his face in the dust.
Goodbye."

“Wait. Don't go.”

“I must go. I'm working. Well, I can
give you five seconds. What's on your
mind?”

Jerry's voice was grim and accusing,
the voice of a man who is about to de-
mand an explanation and intends to
stand no nonsense.

"You know whats on my mind. Why
didn't you tell me you were en,
this Blake-Somerset di
"Disaster, did you say
Chats what I ib?

“You sound as if you hadn't taken to
nk.”
I didn't."

“What's wrong with the poor guy?"

"He's a mess. Totally unfit for human
consumption.”

"Well, I'm certainly surprised to hear
you talk like that about a man who is
your host, with whose food you're at this
very moment. bursting."

“I an: not bursting. | am making а

light Continental breakfast. But that's
not the point."
"What is the point?”
‘The point is that you're not going
to marry him or anyone else. уоште
going to marry me.”

‘There was a silence at the other esd
of the wire. It lasted perhaps a quarter
of a minute, though Jerry would have
put it at more like a quarter of an hour.
Then Kay spoke.

"What did you say?”

“Will you marry me?

“This is the marmalade speaking,
Zoosm It's heady stuff. I ought to
warned you. My good man, you
Чу know me.”

ОГ course I know you."

Five days on an occan liner."

As good as five years ashore. You
can't have forgotten those days.”

“I've never forgotten you singing at
the ship's concert.

"Don't make a joke of it. Im serious.

“You're crazy."

"About you. Well?

"Well wha? I suppose you mean
you want my views. All right, here they
come, You have paid me the greatest
compliment a man can pay a wom
or so they all tell me, but I still maint
you're noncompos. You simply can't go
talking like this to one whose troth is
plighted to another. What would Henry
say if he heard you? He'd be terribly
annoyed and might not ask you to

breakfast again. Goodbye,” said Kay,
“I must rush.”

Barribault's Hotel, situated іп the
heart of Mayfair, is probably the best
and certainly the most expensive estab-
lishment of its kind in London. It caters
principally to Indian таһагајаѕ and

il millionaires, plutocrats not
1 to counting the cost, and as these
е men of impatient habit who want
what they want when they want it and
tend to become peevish if they do not
get theirs quickly, it secs to it that its
room service is prompt and efficient. It
was consequently only a few minutes
after Edmund Billen Christopher had
placed his order for breakfast on the
morning following Jerry's return to Lon-
don that a waiter wheeled a laden table
nto his room on the third floor.
This brother of Kay's fully bore out
the picture she had sketched for the
benefit of the commissaire's secretary. He
not only looked 1 a dachshund, he
looked considerably more like a dach-
shund than most dachshunds do. Seeing
him, one got the feeling that nature had
toyed with the idea of making a dog of
this breed and on second thought had
decided to turn out something with the
same sort of face but not so horizontal
He grected the waiter
" that was virtually a bark,

st,” he added rather и
ily, for the scent of sausages and
bacon was floating over the room like a
benediction.

Biff, inspecting the table, saw that
Barribault’s had given of its abundance.
The coffee was there, the bacon was
there, the sausages were there, and the
eye rested in addition on toast, butter,
marmalade, sugar, salt, pepper, cream,
mustard and orange juice. A full
hand, one might have supposed. Never-
theless, he scemed to feel that there was.
something missing.

"Isn't there any mail?"

"I was expecting a cable. It must have
come by

"Should I inquire at the desk?"

“Do just that. Christopher's the name.”

The waiter went to the telephone, cs-
tablished communi n with the desk
nd, having replaced the recciver, came
k with the good news he had gleaned
from the men up top.

“There is a cable, sir. It is being sent

Biff was unable to click his tongue
censoriously, for he had started on the
sausages, but he looked annoyed.

“Why didn't they send it up before,
blister their insides? Гус been in agon
of suspense.

"Possibly you placed а во Nor готове
sign on your door, sir.”

Biff was fair minded. He saw the jus

tice of this. Barribault’s Hotel had not

n on its character.

"Youre perfectly right, 1 did. It's a
long time since I was in London and I
roamed around last night to a rather
advanced hour, picking up the threads.
You live in London?"

“In the suburbs, sir. Down at
Fields.”

“Nice place?”

“Very nice, sir.

‘ot your little bit of garden and all

/alley

“Yes, sir.”
Good for you. I've been in Paris for
st three years. You know Paris at

the
ай?"

“No, sir. An agreeable city, I have
been told.”

“Well, it’s all right in many ways—

springtime on the boulevards and so
forth, but everyone talks French there.
Sheer affectation, it's always scemed to
me. Do you know what you'd be if you
were in Paris?”
No. sir.
A garçon, that's what you'd be, and
these things would be called saucissons,
and where you live would be the ban-
licue. That just shows you what you'd be
up against if you went and settled there.
"Too silly for words."

At this point a knock sounded on the
door. "Entrez," he shouted. "Sorry, damn
it, I mean Come

A boy entered with an envelope on a
silver, was tipped and withdrew. Biff

tore open the envelope with fingers that
shook a little, scanned its contents and
with a gasping cry sank back in his chair,

gurgling. The waiter eyed him with con-
cern. Their acquaintanceship had been
brief, but like most people who mei
he had rapidly come to look on

a familiar friend,
tressed him. He fea
niece, who lived with him, had
cently been presented by her employer
with a pedigreed boxer, and only yester-
day it had behaved in a similar manner
when about to give up its all after a
rfeit of ice cream, a delicacy of which
it was far too fond.

“Are you ill sir?” he inquired anx-
iously, and Biff looked up, surprised.

“Who, me? I should say not. Never felt
better in my life.”

1 was afraid you might have had bad
news, sir."

Biff rose and tapped him impressively
on his gleaming shirt front. His eyes
were glowing with a strange light.

“Waiter,” he said, “let me tell you
something, as you scem interested. I
doubt if anyone has ever had better
news. I'm floating on a pink cloud over
an ocean of bliss while harps and sacl
buts do their stuff and a thousand voices
give three rousing cheers. Waiter... But
why this formality? May I call you

as
nor dis-

George?"

“Tt is not my name, si
"What is your name?
“William, sir.
Mind if 1 address you as Bill?”

“Not at all, sir, though I am usually
called Wi

A slight frown marred the brightness
of Biff's face, like a cloud passing over
the sun on a fine summer day.

“This “sir” stuif, I wish you'd cut it
ош. Its undemocratic, I don't like it
First names between buddies, don't you
think? Well, not exactly first names, bc-
cause that would mean your calling me
Edmund, and you probably feel as I do
that there are few fouler labels. Make it
if, Willi
Very good, sir.”

"Very good what?”
"Very good, Bilf,” said the
a visible effort.

Biff had risen from his chair and was
pacing the room in an emotional man-
ner, his sausages temporarily forgotten

"Thats better. Yes, Willie o' man, I
was christened Edmund Biflen after a
godfather. But don't in your haste start
pitying me, because if I hadn't been
christened Edmund Biffen, you wouldn't
now be chewing the fat with a milion
aire. Yes, you heard me. That's what I
said, a millionaire. For that's what I am,
Willie o' man. This cable tells the story.
My godfather, a big wheel named Ed-
mund Biffen Pyke, who recently turned
in his dinner pail and went to reside
with the morning stars, has left me his
entire pile, amounting to more millions

п you could shake ick at in a
lays."

There was a momentary silence, and
then the words "Cor lumme!” rang
through the room. It was unusual for the
iter to use this exclamation, for as a
rule he took pains to avoid the ver
lar, and the fact that he did so now
showed how deeply the news had stirred

aiter with

him. He was a moth-eaten man in his
middle 50s, who looked as if he gardened
after hours in his suburban home and on
Sundays took around the offertory bag
in a suburban church, as was indeed the
case. His name was William Albert Pil-
beam, and he had a son named Percy.
who ran a private inquiry agency, and a
niece called Gwendoline, who was secre-
tary to the president of the Mammoth
Publishing Company, but this did not
show in his appearance. He gaped at
Biff, stunned.

‘Cor lumme,” he said. "It's like win-
ning a pool!

Biff could not have agreed with him
more.

"Exactly like winning a pool," he said,
"because the odds against my bringing
home the bacon were so astronomical
that 1 can hardly believe it even now. 1
"t help feeling there's а catch some-
where. The late Pyke w;
and he never approved of me, except
once, when I saved him from drowning
at his Long Island residence. He didn't
like me being pinched by New York's
finest for getting into fights in bars, as
happened from time to time. He always
bailed me out, TIL give him credit for
that, but you could sce he wasn't pleased.
He looked askance, Willie о' man, and
when I tried to tell him that boys will be
boys and you're only young once, there
4s nothing in his manner to suggest
that I was putting the idea across. Do
you often get into fights in barsz"

Mr. Pilbeam said that he did not.

"Not cven when flushed with wine?"

It appeared that Mr. Pilbeam never
ne flushed with wine. He was, he
abstainer.
said Biff, shocked. He
ad known in a vague sort of way that
such characters existed, but he had never
expected to mect one of them. "You
mean you get by in this disturbed. post
War world on lemonade and barley

is an austerc man

155

PLAYBOY

water? You're ccrtainly doing it the hard
way. Still, I suppose you avoid certain
inconveniences. It gets boring after a
while being thrown into the tank, always
with that nervous feeling that this time
the old man won't come through with
the necessary bail. But you know how it
is. I like my little drop of something of
an evening, and unfortunately, when I
indulge, 1 sccm to lose my calm judg-
ment. That's why I'm in London. 1 had
to skip out of Paris somewhat hurriedly
as the result of socking an agent de
police.”

Mr. Pilbeam said, “Good gracious!”
adding that strong wine was a mocker,
nd Bilf said he didn't mind it mocking
him, but he wished it would stop short of
leading him on to swat the constabulary.

"I'd get into an argument with a fel-
low in a bar and at the height of the
proceedings, just as 1 was about to strike
him on the mazard, this fli tervened,
and his was the mazard 1 struck. It was
a mistake. I can sec that now, But his
manner was brusque and, as I have indi-
cated, I had been hoisting a few. 1 man-
aged to escape on winged feet, but I
deemed it best to hop on the next plane
to London without stopping to pack and
make my getaway before the authorities
started watching the ports. On arriving
in London, 1 cabled the New York law-
yers, asking if by chance there was some
small legacy coming my way, and back
comes this gram informing me that 1 cop
the lot. As you say, very like winning a
pool. The most I was hoping for was a
thousand dollars or so, and I wasn’t
really expecting that.” He paused, fixing
Mr. Pilbeam with a reproachful eye, for
the other was sidling toward the door.
“Are you leaving me?”

Mr, Pilbeam explained that he would
greatly have preferred to stay and hear
more, for he had been held spellbound
by even this brief résumé, but duty called
him elsewhere. A waiter's time is not
his own.

The door closed and Biff resumed his
breakfast. And never in the history of
sausages and bacon had sausages been
зо toothsome, bacon so crisp and palat-
able. The marmalade, too, had a tang
which even Henry Blake-Somerset's
ported Dundce could not have rivaled.
He was covering the final slice of toast
with a liberal smearing of it, when the
telephone rang.

“Biff?”

‘Spe

“Oh,
smith

Biff uttered a joyful yelp.

“Well, fry me an oyster! What are you
doing in London? I thought you were
Our Man in America. Aren't you New
York-corresponding any longer?”

“No, I lost that job two years ago. I let
the paper in for a libel suit, and they

im-

hullo, Biff, This is Jerry Shoe-

156 fired me!”

I'm sorry. That's too bad."

“My fault. Not that that makes it any
bette

“What are you doing now?”

"I'm editor of one of Tilbury's papers.
Don't ask me which onc."

"Of course not. Wouldn't dream of it.
Which one?”

"Society Spice."

“My God! But that's a loathsome rag.
Not your cup of tea at all, I'd have
thought.”

“It isn't. I hate the foul thing. But 1
didn't ring you up to talk about my
troubles. I want to see уоп."

"And 1 want to see you, Jerry o' m.
Jerry, the most extraordinary thing has
happened. This] make you whistle. My
godfather —"

“Tall me about it later. Can you come
to my place at about five?”

“Sure. Where is it?”

"Three Halsey Chambers. In Halsey
Court. Just round the corner from Barri-
bault's,

“Гуе got to worl
‘Oh, work?" said Biff with a shiver of
distaste, It was a nervous habit he
self had always avoided as far as possible.

He hung up the receiver and returned
to his toast and marmalade.

It had been Jerry's intention, when
he opened the door of Number Three
Halsey Chambers at five o'clock and
found Biff on the mat, to start without
delay talking to him, as Kay had directed,
like one of those Dutch uncles who are
so much more formidable than the ordi-
nary run-of-the-mill uncle. In the inter-
vals of assembling next week’s Society
Spice during the afternoon he had
thought up scveral good things to say to
him, all calculated to bring the blush of

shame to even his hardened check, and
he was about to give them utterance

when Biff raised a restraining hand.

“I know, Jerry о? man, I know. What
a long time it is since we saw cach other
and how well I'm looking and I'm long-
ing to hcar all your news and whatever
became of old what’s-his-name and so on
and so forth. But we haven't leisure for
all that jazz. Let's take the minutes as
read and get down to the agenda. Cast
your eye on this," said Biff, thrusting the
able at him.

Jerry took it, read it with widening
eyes, drew a deep breath, stared, read it
again and drew another deep breath.

“Good Lord!” he said at length,
“Exactly how I felt.”
“Well, I'll be damned!”
“Just what I said.”
“Who's Pyke, deceased?”
“My godfather.”
Did he leave much?”
“Millions.”
"And you get it all?”

"Every cent."

“But that's wonderful.”

"I'm not ill pleased, I must confess.”

“What does it feel like being a mil-
lionaire?”

Biff mused a moment. He had not
really analyzed his state of mind, but he
was able to give a rough idea of it.

“It’s an odd sensation. Much the same
as going up in an express elevator and
finding at the halfway point that you've.
left all your insides at the third floor.
It's difficult to realize at first that уоште
one of the higher-bracket boys and that
from now on money is no object."

“I can imagine.”

“When you do realize it, you feel a
sort of yeasty benevolence toward the
whole human race rather like what you
get on New Year's Eve after the second
bottle. You ycarn to bc a do-goodcr. You
think of all the poor slobs who aren't
millionaires and your heart bleeds for
them. You want to start fixing them up.
with purses of gold — bringing the sur
shine into their drab lives, if you get
what I mean."

“I get it

“Take you, for instance. Here you are,
working on a rag of a paper no right-
thinking man would care to bc found
dead in a ditch with, and nothing to look
forward to except a miscrable impecuni-
ous old age ending in death in a gutter.’

“That's what you read in the tea

leaves, is it?"
That's what. Death in a gutter,” said
Biff firmly. “And why? Because you're
short of capital. You can’t get anywhere
in the world today without capital. I've
noticed the same thing about myself. I've
always been full of schemes, but I never
had the cash to promote them. Till now,
of course. What you need is a purse of
gold, Jerry о” man. I'm penciling you in
for ten thousand pounds.”

“What!”
lip of the tongue. I meant twenty."
Arc you offering me twenty thousand
pounds?

"As a starter. More. where came
from, if you need it. Just say the word.
Alter all, we're buddies, you can't get
away from that.”

Jerry shook his head.

“No thanks, Biff. It’s awfully good of
you, but you'll have to bring the sun-
shine into somebody else's drab life. 1
want to be unique.”

“How do you mean, unique?”

“I want to be the only member of
your circle who doesn’t come trotting up
to you and offering to sit in your lap
and share the wealth, How many friends
have you, would you say?”

“Quite a number.”

“Well, take it from me, they'll all try
to get their cut.
сері you
cept me.”

“Very disappointing," said

ihere was silence for a moment while he
scemed to brood on Jerry's eccentric
attitude. He himself had never found
money anything of a problem. If you
had it, fine, you lent it to your pals. If
you hadn't, you touched the pals. As
simple as that. “You're sure 1 can’t per
ade yo
“Quite sure.”
“Nothing doing?
Nothing.”
rwenty thousand isn't much."
It sounds a lot to me. ГЇЇ tell you
what I will do, Biff, as you're an old
friend. When I've died in my gutter, you
can pay the funeral expenses.”
"Right That's a gentleman's agree-
ment. But its going to be hard to get
ма of all that money if everyone's as
uncooperative as you."
be," Jerry assured him.
“They'll be lining up in a queue with
outstretched hands like the staff of a
Paris hotel when a guest's leaving. When
do you collect?
Ah, there you have me. They dont
say in the cable. They simply зау...
bur you've read it. And here's something
Td like to have your views on
Did you notice something si
thar cable? The bit at the end?
“You mean about you inheriting the
money in accordance with the provisions
of the trust? Yes, I saw that. 1 wonder
what it means.
“So do 1. What trust? Which trust?
1 don't like the sound of it. They say
"Leur follows,’ so 1 imagine the expla-
nation will be at, but it makes me
uneasy. Suppose it’s one of those freak
wills with a clause in the small print
saying I've got to dye my hair purple or
roll a peanut along Piccadilly with my

hey wor

in

аз Pyke, deceased, the sort of man
to make a freak will?

"He never gave me that impression.
As 1 was saying to a capital fellow I met
at the hotel this morning, he was very
much on the austere side. Limey by
birth, but converted in the course of the
years into the typical American tycoon,
all cold gray eye and jutting jaw. Noth-
ing frivolous about Edmund Bilfen Pyke
when I knew him. But that was three
years ago, and I did hear somebody say
he'd become a bit on the eccentric side
since he retired from business. These
big financiers often do, they tell me,
when they stop going to the office.
“They've nothing to occupy their time,
and the next thing you know they're
going about in a cocked hat with a hand
tucked waistcoat, saying
they're Napoleon. Or cutting out paper
dolls or claiming that Queen Elizabeth
wrote Shakespeare's plays."

Very strany
“Very.”

“Well, lets hope you'll be all right.
“Oh, 1 shall be all right, whate

into their

EU

because if I have to push pea-

happen:
nuts with my nose, ГЇЇ do it blithely. I
don't intend to let a little thing like that
stand between me and a bank roll."

‘That's the spirit. 1 wouldn't worry
about this trust business. It probably
merely means that you don't get thc
capital cash down but simply collect the
interest till you're forty or fifty or what-
ever it is.

“Which, at even four percent on the
Pyke millions, should work out at
around two hundred thousand a ye
‘This will be perfectly agreeable to me.
I can scrape along on two hundred
thousand. "he only trouble is that in
these legal matters there's always а long
маре wait before the balloon goes up.
It may be months before I get a cent,
and in the meantime funds are running
short. It’s not cheap living at Barri-
baules.”

What on carth made you go there?”

“Oh, I thought 1 would. I'm sorry 1
did, though, now, because, as 1 say, my
sojourn has made the privy purse look
as if it had been going in for onc of
thosc dict systems. But all is not lost.
Ive a picture over in Paris that 1 won
in a raffle and was saving for a rainy
day. Do you know anything about
pictur

“Not a thing.”

"Well, this one’s a Boudin, and it's
quite valuable. I'm going to phone Kay
— my sister — did I ever mention her to
you? — we share an apartment — to send
it to me, and then TIL sell it and be on
a sound financial basis agai

“And while you're waiting to sell it,
why don't you move in here with me?”

“May 1 really?"

“If you can stand the squalo

Halsey Court, though situated in May-
fair, was no luxury spot. It was a dark
Titde culdesac in which cats roamed
and banana skins and old newspapers
collected on the sidewalks, and the flats
Halsey Chambers were in keeping
th the general seediness of the locality.
Ibury House did not believe in paying

ог editors large salaries,
ess of the room in whi

of Jerry's means. But Biff had по
to find with it.

“What squalor?” he said. ^I call it
snug. You should see my place
after а Saturday-night party. Thanks,
Jerry, ГИ be with you before yonder sun
has set. Very handsome of you.

“A pleasur

"pl check out of Barribaults this
evening. By the way,” said Bif, sud-
denly remembering a point which had
been puzzling him since breakfast time,
“there's a mystery you can clear up, if
you will be so good. You phoned me at
Barribault’s this morning. Correct? Well.
how on earth did you know I was ther

“Kay told me.

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158 probably didn't tell you w:

Biff stared. He could make nothing of

this.
“Pull yourself together, Jerry o' man,
ad if you're just trying to be funn
don't. She can't have told you. She's ii
Paris.

"So was I in Paris. 1 got back yester-
day.”

“Well, ГИ be darned. But here's an-
other point, How did you meet Kay?
And how did you know it was Kay whe
you did meet her? You had never seen
her in your life."

“Yes, I had. We traveled over on the
same boat from New York two years
ago. We met the night before last at a
police station.”

‘This interested Bitt, himself an old
patron of police stations.

“Got herself jugged, did she? Cops
finally closed in on her, ch

His words revolted Jerry. Like many
another young man in love, he found a
brother's attitude toward the loved one
jarring.

Not at all. 1 was notifying the police
that I had lost my wallet, and she was
notifying them that she had lost you. She
was very worried about you, terribly
worried.”

No Dutch unele could have spoken
with more reproach, but Bif stoutly
declined to show remorse.

“She was, was she? Well, I'm terribly
worried about her. I don’t suppose she
told you, but that child is sticking out
her foolish little neck . . . whats the
ter?”

“Nothing,” said Jerry. He had merely
shuddered at hearing Kay's neck so
described.

"She's gone and got engaged to a pill
of the first water, who can't possibly
make her happy. A ghastly limey . . .
Sorry, 1 forgot you were one.”

“Don't apologize. Somebody has to be.
A ghastly limey, you were saying.”
llow in the British Embassy called
Blake-Somerset, you wouldn't know
him.

but have slept in his spare bed and eaten
his marmalade. I couldn't
partment, so Kay made h
for the night. He didn't
pleased."

“He wouldn't be. Did you gather the
impression that he was a pill?

"Almost immediately."

"It beats me what she sees in

“I wondered. that, too.”

“Well, there it is. Girls are odd. Linda
used to perplex me greatly at times.
Have you ever met Tilbury's піссе,
Linda Rome?”

"No. Kay mentioned her name, but
we've never met

“I was engaged to her once.
о Kay told me.”

“Oh, she told you? Well, what she
s that Linda's

scem

the only girl I ever loved, which, con-
sidering that she's a brunette, is rather
remarkable. 1 worshiped her, Jerry о"
man, and when she ve me the bum's
rush, my heart broke and life became a
blank

“I'd never noticed it.”

"No, Г wear the mask. But you can
take it from me that that’s what hap-
pened. You see before you, Jerry, a
broken man with nothing to live for.”

"Except the Pyke mil

“Oh, those,” said Bill, dismissing them.
with a contemptuous wave of the hand.
He fell into a moody silenee, but it was
not long before he was speaking again,
this time in more cheerful vein.

“Jerry, о' man.”

Mes?

Shall 1 tell you something? I've been
thinking of Lind. d I've reached а
rather interesting conclusion. 1 believe
there's quite a chance that under the
present altered conditions the sun may
come smiling through again. Now that
l've got these millions — added. attrac-
tion, as you might say— she ma
things over in her mind
It's possible.

“Have you studied the sex closely?”

“Not very.”

at апі I know that it often hap-
pens that a girl who has handed a man
his hat and helped him from her pres-
ence with a kick in the pants gets a
completely different slant on him whe
she learns that he owns the i
stock in about fifty-sev
porations. I think that when Linda finds
out the score, she'll forgive and forget.
Am I right or wrong

Right, I should say, unless you did
something particularly out of the way
to ollend her. What made her hand you
your har?

“Blondes, Jerry 0' man. I was rather
festooned with blondes at that time, and
she objected — I may say she objected
strongly. You know what Linda’s like.”
“No, I don't. I've never seen he

“Nor you have. 1 was forgetting. Well,
she's one of those calm, quiet girls you'd
think nothing would steam up, but she
has this in

common with a stick of
, given the right con-
explode with a deafen-
ing report, stewing ruin and desolation
in all directions. She did this when she
found me giving supper to a blonde
whose name, if 1 remember correctly, was
Mabel. But that was a year ago. A year's
a long time, J
"Iti
"She may have changed her mind.
"Girls have been known to."
"Especially if I make it clear to her
that I'm off blondes for life. Do you
know what Im going to do? I'm going
to seek her out and see how she feels
about things. The trouble is I don’t
know her address. She used to have an

apartment in Chelsea, but she's not there
now and І cant find her name i
telephone book. Short of enga
tectives and bloodhounds, I don’t know
what to do.”

Perfectly simple. You say she's Til-
bury's niece. Ask Tilbu
Biff scratched his chin thoughtfully,

“Between ourselves, о" man, I'm not
too eager to meet Tilbury just now."
“Then ask his secretary. She's bound
to know.”
“My God, Jerry, you're shrewd. ТИ do
ist that little thing. I'll go and see the
wench immediately. And meanwhile you
might be calling Kay up and telling her
the good news. And don't forget about
that picture. Impress her that I need it
without delay, or I shan't be able to meet
current expenses, I'll write down the
number for you. You don't think there's
danger that Tilbury will be Turk
in his office as late as thi:
“He probably left hour
don't you want to meet him?’
“ҮН tell you. Have you noticed a
peculiar thing as you go through life,
Jerry? 1 allude to the fact that whatever
you do, you can't please everybody. Take
the present case. Edmund Biffen Pyke's
testamentary dispositions or whatever
you call them have made me all smile
but I greatly fear they will have
istered a nasty jolt to Tilbury. He was
the old boy's brother and must have є
pected to gather in a substantial portion
of the kitty, if not the whole works, and
1 can see him taking the thing a bit hard.
If he’s had the news, the sight of me
might well give him a stroke. Still, he's
loaded with the stuff, so this little extra
bit ought not really to matter to h
There's always a bright side,
d on this philosophical note took his
departure,

ago. Why

Left alone, Jerry lost no time in call-
ing the number Biff had given him. The
prospect of hearing Kay's voice again was
one that a

The voice that replied was not K
It was that of Henry Blake-Somerset.

"Who is this?"

“Oh, h Mr. Blakc-Somerset, This
is Jerry Shoesmith. Can I speak to Miss
Christopher

^Miss Christopher is not in." said
Henry, as frigidly as if he were refusing
some doubtful character a visa.

This was not strictly true, for she was
in the next room dressing for dinner,
but he п no mood to be fussy about
the wuth. He was thinking the worst.
He had been suspicious about his bc-
trothed's relations with this Shoesmith
fellow ever се she and he had
appeared at his door on what were
obviously excellent terms, and this tele-
phone call— this sinister, secret, sur-
reptitious telephone call — had cemented

THE BAD DREAM
=== 3

PLAYBOY

those suspicions. There was a cold gleam
in his pale eyes as he banged the receiver
мо its place.

Kay came out of the bedroom, all
dressed up.

“Who w
asked.

"Wrong number," said Henry.

that on the phone?” she

The Tilbury of whom mention has
bcen made from time to time in this
chronicle, the employer of Jerry Shoe-
smith and William Albert Pilbeam’s
niece Gwendoline Gibbs, should more
properly have been alluded to as Lord
Tilbury, for it was several years now
се а gracious sovereign, as a reward
for flooding Great Br
ihe most repellent daily, weekly and
monthly periodicals seen around since
ihe invention of the printing press,
had bestowed on him a barony. He was
the founder and proprietor of the Mam-
moth Publish
moment when Jerry
had taken place he was in his office at
Tilbury House dictating letters to Gwen-
doline Gibbs. And it may be said at once
that he was doing it with the love-light
1 his eyes and in a voice which a poet
would have had no hesitation
paring to that of a turtledove
its mate.

Lord Tilbury was short, stout and
clined to come out in spots if he ate
lobster, but there is no law prohibiting
short, stout press lords, even when spotty,
from falling in love with willowy
blondes, and there are few blondes more
Позу than Gwendoline. He was, more-
over, at what is sometimes called the
dangerous ge of those Pitts-
burgh millionaires who are so prone to
marry into musical-comedy choruses.

He was a widower. In the days when
he had been plain George Pyke, long be-
fore he had even founded Society Spice,
the first of his numerous enterprises, he
had married a colorless young woman
by the name of Lucy Maynard, and when
е she ЈЕ d
out of life, it
to look about him
replacement. His work absorbed
», and he felt no need for fem
ip other than that of his
¢ Linda Rome, who kept house for
him at his mansion on Wimbledon Com-
mon.

And then the agency had sent him
Gwendoline Gibb: d it was as if one
of his many employees — who were always
ying to one another that what the old
son of a bachelor needed was to have a
bomb touched off under him — had pro
ceeded from words to action. He looked
forward ly to the time when, with
her at his side, he would take his annual
holiday on the yacht which ought at any
moment to be in readiness at Cannes.

п com-
alli

after a year or two of m;
drifted colorlessly

160 Meanwhile, he dictated letters to her.

The one he was dictating now was to
the editor of Society Spice, whose work,
he ed, lacked zip and ginger.
Society Spice had once been edited by
m's son Percy, and under his
ince had reached a high pitch of
excellence with a new scandal featured
almost every week, But Percy was shrewd
and he saw no reason why he should
nose out peoples discreditable secrets for
a salary from Tilbury House when he
would be doing far beter for himself
them out on his own behalf. He
, borrowed a little capital

private investigation
and Lord Tilbury had never
ceased to regret his loss. None of his
successors had had the Pilbeam touch,
and this latest man —Shoesmith, his
name was— was the least satisfactory of
the lot.

He finished ng the note, its
acerbity caus doline to label it
mentally as a stinker, and when the last

harsh word had been spoken retu
to his melting mood.

1 hope 1 am not tiring you, Miss
Gibbs," he said tenderly.

‘Ob, no, Lord Tilbury.

“I am sure you must be tired." his
lordship insisted. "lt is this muggy
weather. You had better go home and li
down."

Gwendoline assured D

im that his ki
was greatly appreciated, but
that she had a dinner date for that night
and would have to wait till her cavalier
arrived to pick her up.

“My cousin,” she said, and Lord Til-
bury who had writhed in a spasm of
jealousy, stopped writhing, He had no
objection to cousins.

“Tsee,” he said, relieved. “Then would
you mind putting in a New York rele-
phone call for me."

“Yes, Lord Tilbury.”

What would be the time in New

Yor
;wendoline made a rapid calculation
and said that it would be about 12:30.
“Then J ought just to catch Mr. Has-
kell before he goes to lunch. The call i
t0 Haskell and Green, They are a legal
m. Ask for a. person-to-person call to

‚ Lord Tilbury.”

“The number is Mu

Oh, and, Miss Gibbs, you sent that mar-
conigram to Mr, Llewellyn's boat?"

"Yes, Lord Tilbury."

“The door closed, and Lord Tilbury
fell into a reverie, thinking of this and
that, but principally of Gwendoline
Gibbs’ profile, which he had been study-
ing with loving care for the past half
hour. He was in the process of trying to
decide whether she was see
dvant;
door opened and a girl came
was about to her how she dared enter
the presence without making an appoint-

ment and — worse — without knocking.
when he saw that it was his niece, Linda
Rome.

In comparison with Gwendoline Gibbs.
Linda Rome could not have been called
beautiful, but she was an attractive girl
with clear eyes and a wide and good-
humored mouth. Kay had described her
to Jerry as sensible, and it was this qual-
ity perhaps that stood out most in her
appearance. She lool and,
Mr. Gish of the Gi Bond
eet, where she worked, would have
testified, she was extremely
Soothing, too, was another adjective that
could have applied to her, though her
advent seemed to have irritated Lord
ilbury. There was suppressed annoy-
ance in his manner as he eyed her.

"Yes?" he said. "Yes, Linda, what is it?”

“Am I interrupting you?’

"Yes," said Lord Tilbury, who did not
believe in formal courtesy between uncle
and niece. "I am making a telephone call
10 New York.”

"m sorry. I only looked in to tell you
that I've fixed us up with rooms at Barri-
ault’s. With so little time before you'll
be off on your yacht trip, it didn't seem

capable.

worth while engaging a new май,”
There had recently been a volcanic

upheaval at The Oaks, Wimbledon Com
mon, with Lord Tilbury in one of his
perious moods falling foul of
domestic helpers and
portfolios in
sible way
ng to do
was to move temporarily to a hotel.
опште on the third floor, I'm on the
h. We shall be quite comfortable."
‘or how long? It may be for weeks.”
"No. that's all right. After you left this
morning a phone call came from the
skipper of the yacht. Apparently what
ever was wrong with the poor thing's i

a body,

sides has been pur right, and he says
you

an st
to.

“Good. I wish I could start tomorrow.
but unfortunately Ivor Llewellyn i
his way over from New York and I shall
have to be here to give him lunch. It's
3 great nuisance, but unavoidable.”

“Who's Ivor Llewellyn?

“Motion-picture man. Big advertiser.
ford to offend him. And now
if you don't mind, Linda, I am making
this important telephone call to New
York.
То Mr. Llewellyn?”

No, he's on the Queen Mary. This is
to Edmund's lawyers.”
‘Oh, about the will?”
"Precisel
I must wait to hear that, I wonder if
he's left his money to you."

"I can think of no one else to whom
he could leave it. We were never on very
dose ternis, but he was my elder brother.

"How about charities?

пс you

rt your cruisc any

Г can't

“He did not approve of charities.

“Then you ought to collect. Though
why you want any more money bcats mie.
Haven't you enough already?"

“Don't be silly,” said Lord Tilbury,
who disliked foolish questions. “Ah!”

The telephone had rung. His hand
darted at the receiver like a striking
snake.

Mr. Haskell? .. . How do you do? .. .
is Lord Tilbury of the Mammoth
ng Company. I understand you
are handling the estate of my brother
Edmund Bilfen Руке..."

For some moments his lordship's share
in the conversation was confined to grec
ings and civilities. Then, getting down
to it like a good businessman, he asked

to be informed of the contents of Ed-
mund Biffen Pyke's will, and for perhaps

half a minute sat listening in silence. At
the end of that period he broke it
abruptly.

“WHAT!” he roared in a voice th
caused his nicce to jump at least two
inches, When she returned to earth, the

wterjection still seemed to be echoing
through the room, and she was conscious
of a mild surprise that plaster had not
fallen from the ceiling.

Surprise was followed by alarm. Lord
bury's fice had taken on a purple
and his breathing was stertorous.

"Uncle George!" she cried. "What
is it?’

But she was an intelligent girl and did
not really need to ask the question. Tt
was plain to her that the news that had
been walted across the Atlantic had not
been good news and that it was no
heritor of millions who sat spluucring
before her.

n 1 get you a glass of water

“Water!” gurgled Lord Tilbury, and
you could tell by his manner that he
thought poorly of the мий. "Do you
know —
"What"

“Do you know —?

T
ti

“Do you know who he's left his money

to?” demanded Lord Tilbury, becom-
ing coherent. “That young waster Chris-
topher:

He had expected the information to
astound her, and it did.

“To Вир"

"You heard me.”

“But Biff always gave me the idea that
he and Uncle Edmund were hardly on
speaking terms. What on earth made
do that?”

Lord Tilbury did not answer. He was
g before him in a sandbagged man-
ner that spoke of an overwrought soul,
and it seemed to Linda the tactful thing
- this stricken man to his gr

She moved to the door, and went out.

A few minutes later Lord Tilbury, too,
took his departure, en route to his club,

to leav

where he could obtain the stiff drink he
so sorely needed. His preoccupation was
so great that he passed Gwendoline
Gibbs in the outer office without a word
or a look, This was very unusual, and it
puzzled Gwendoline. She was not a girl
who as a rule thought for any length of
time about anything except motion pic-
tures and hairdos, but she found herself
meditating now on her employer with
what for her was a good deal of intensity.

Lord Tilbury's emotional state of mind
had not passed unnoticed by her. She
had discussed it with her cousin Percy,
1 ће had confirmed her impresion

that all those tender glances and all that

solicitude for her welfare were
cant. It would not be the first time, said
Percy, that a middle-aged widower had
become enamored of his secretary. His
father, Mr. Pilbeam senior, had once told
a that hali the couples who came to
ibaules Hotel were elderly business-
men who had
It was propinquity that did
the working with them all d:
the same office.

Her own reading had convinced her of
the truth of this. In her capacity of sec-
y to the head of Tilbury House she
got all the firm’s publications free, and
in many of these such as Cupid, Romance
Weekly and the rest of them it was com-
mon form for the rich man to marry the
poor but beautiful girl. She could th
offhand of a dozen such unions which

snif

and every

ross in the course of her

studies.
A dreamy look came into her cy

if she was wishing that her employer
could have been a little younger and a
good deal slimmer and altogether more
like Captain Frobisher of the
пагах the one who married the gov-
she was also thinking that a girl
еп ево на OST TREE TOR
1 just written the words “Lady
п her notebook, to see how
they looked, when the door opened and
Biff appeared.

Biff came in with a jaunty stride, as
befitted a newly made millionaire, but at
the sight of Gwendoline he halted ab-
тару, rocked back on his heels and
stood staring at her, eyes apop.
he said, when able to speak.

"Good evening,” said Gwendoline.
‘Are you looking for someone;

“Not now that I've found you," said
Biff, who prided himself on the swiftness
work. The odd breathless feeling
which had paralyzed his vocal cords had
subsided, and he was his old debonair
self again, The mission on which he had
come, the quest for Linda Rome's ad-
dress, had passed from his mind.

“If you are,” said Gwendoline, ignor-
ing the remark, which she considered in
dubious taste and bordering on
fresh, "you've come too late. There
anybody here.”

“Just as E would

the

nged it. if

"I'd like to say you blend nicely
into this organization, Parker.”

161

PLAYBOY

162 shamus

Fd been consulted. Old pie-faced Til-
bury not around:
"If you are alluding to my employ-ah,
he left half an hour ago.
Biff nodded understand:
“That's always the way. Everybody
works but Father. I've never known one
of these tycoons who wasn’t a clock
watcher. So he sneaks off, does he, and
leaves you at your post? Poor, faithful
little soul. You, I take it, are his right-
hand woman?
I am his secretary.
“That's just your modest way of put-
ting it. TI bet you really run the show.
Without you, the Mammoth Publishing
Company would go pop and cease to
exist, and what a break that would be
for everybody. But it's a shame, You're
ted here. You ought to be im the
movies."
ndoline’s haughtiness [cll from
her like a garment. This was the way she
liked people to talk. Her атте eyes
glowed, and for the first time she al-
lowed herself to smile.

“Do you really think so?"

^] do indeed.

“Quite a number of my friends have
told me the same thing.”

“I'm not surprised.

“There's a big movie man, Mr. Ivor
Llewellyn, coming he a day or two.
I'm hoping he'll think so, too."

"I know Ivor Llewellyn. I interviewed
him once.

“What's he like?”

A hippopotamus, You think he may
give you a job?”

“I wish he would. I'd love to be in
pictures."

"Pix, I believe, is the more correct
term. Well, 1 shall watch your career
h considerable interest. In my of
ion, you will go lar. If I may say so, you
have that thing, that certain thing, that
makes the birds forget to sing. Arising
from which, how do you react to the
idea of letting me buy you a few cents’
worth of dinner?”

Gwendoline had made a dis

“You're American, aren't yo

“Not only American, but one of the
Americans who have made the country
great. Well, how about a bite?”

“I'm waiting for Percy.

“That sounds like the title of one of
those avant-garde offBroadway shows.
Who's Percy?"

“My cousin, He's taking me to dinner,
but he's late. I suppose he's out on a
case.”

“Out on a what?"

“He runs an investigation agency.

“You mean he's a private eye?” said

> intrigued. “Now there's a thing Га
have liked to be. The fifth of bourbon
the desk drawer, the automatic in the
holster and the lightly clad secretary on
the lap. Yes, I've often wished I were a

“What are you?"

“Me?” Biff flicked a speck of dust from
his coat slecve. “Oh, I'm a millionaire.”

“And I'm the Queen of Sheba

Biff shook his head.

"The Queen of Sheba was a brunette.
You're more the Helen of Troy type.
Not that Helen of Troy was in your
lass. You begin where she left off.”
Gwendoline's initial feeling of hosi
ity toward this intruder had now van-
ished completely.

No kidding,” she said. "Are you
really a millionaire?”

“Sure. Ask the waiter on the third
floor at Barribaults. Name of Pilbeam.”

Why, that’s my uncle.”

This seems to bring us very close
together.

“Is your name Christopher?"

dmund Biffen Christopher.”
1 was lunching with Uncle Willic
this morning, and he told me all about
you. He said he was there when a cable
came saying you had come into mi
lions.”

“That's right.”

200!

"What he said, as I recall, was ‘Cor
lumme! but I imagine the two expres-
sions mean about the same thing. Yes,
your Uncle Willie giving me break-
fast when the story broke, and if he gives
me breakfast, it seems only fair that I
should give you dinner. Reciprocity, it's
called. And another aspect of the matte
Don't overlook the fact that these pri-
vate eyes have to watch the pennic:
This Percy of yours is probably planning.
to takc you to Lyons Popular € id
push meat loaf and cocoa into you. With
me, it'll be the Savoy Grill and what
you'll get will be caviar to start with
and, to follow, whatever you may select
from the bill of fare, paying no atten-
ion whatsoever to the prices in the
righthand column. The whole washed
down with some nourishing wine tha
foams at the mouth when the waiter
takes the cork out. Grab your hat and
come along.

Gwendoline, though her eyes glowed
at the picture he had conjured up, re-
mained firm.

“We can't go without Percy.”

“To hell, if 1 may use the expression,
with Percy. Stand him up.”

“Certainly not. I can't hurt his feel
ings.”

"OK," said Biff amiably, It had oc-
curred to him that it might be interest-
ing to meet the head of a private-inquiry
agency and learn all that went on in a
concern like that, Probably this Percy
would prove to have a fund of good
stories about dope rings, spy rings,
ja's rubies and what not. It was
odd, though, that stuff about hurting his
feelings. He had not known till then
that private eyes had any feelings.

m;

Jt was with relief that Jerry reached
home that night and settled himself in
thc onc comfortable chair Number Three,
Halscy Chambers, possessed, He mixcd
himself a whiskey and soda, far stronger
than Henry Blake-Somerset would ha
approved, and fell to thinking how pleas-
ant it would be if somcone were to
leave him nine or ten million. He tried
not to envy Biff, but he could not help
wishing that there were more godfathers
like the late E. B. Pyke around. His own
had been content to fulfill his obli
tions with a small silver mug.

His meditations were interrupted. by
the clicking of a key in the front door,
the falling with a crash of something
that sounded like the hatstand in the
П and a sharp yelp of agony from, he
supposed, Biff, on whose toes the object
had apparently descended. The next
moment Biff entered, followed by a
pimpled young man who was a stranger
to Jeny.

“Hi, Jerry,” he said.

ve

He spoke so thickly and was weaving
his walk that Jerry was

so noticeably
able to form an

stant diagnosis.

“Bif, уоште blotto

“And why not?” said ВИТ warmly. He
made a movement to seat himself, missed
the chair by some inches and continued
his remarks from the floor. “You don’t
become a millionaire every day, do you?
And it’s a poor heart that never rejoices,
її it? You can take it from me, Jerry
o' man, that if a fellow raised from rags
to riches at the breakfast table isn't
tanked to the uvula by nightfall, it sim-
ply means he hasn't been trying. Meet
my friend Percy Pilbeam.”

His friend Percy Pilbeam was a singu-
Тапу uninviting young of about
Bilf's age. His cyes were too small and
too close together and he marcelled his
hair in a manner distressing to right
thinking people, besides having side
whiskers and a small and revolting mus
tache. He looked to Jerry like something
unpleasant out of an early Evelyn
Waugh novel, and he took as instant a
dislike to him as he had taken to Henry
Blake-Somerset.

"He's a private сус," said Diff. "Runs
the Argus Inquiry Agency. Makes his
iving measuring footprints and picking
up small objects [rom the carpet and
placing them carefully in envelopes. Get
him to tell you sometime how he se-
cured the necessary evidence in the case
of Nicholson ws. Nicholson, Hibbs,
Alsopp, Bunter, Frobisher, Davenport
and others. Well, sec you later, o' man,”
he said, rising with some difficulty and
weaving into his bedroom. “Got to
freshen up a b

Percy Pilbeam uttered a brief snigger
and gave his mustache a twirl.

"What a night!” he said.

"p can imagine,” said Jerry aloofly.
lad 1 managed to get him home all

have been easy.”

n't, He's the sort that gets
fractious after he’s had a few. He wanted
to fight the policeman on the corner. I
hauled him away.

Very good of you
“Does he often carry on like that?"
“He was rather apt to when I knew

him in New York.”

“Odd how drink affects people so dil
ferently. I know а man — fellow named
Murphy Fleet Street chap — who gets
more and more amiable the more he
puts away. He can shift the stuff all
night and never turn a hair.

"Its a gift.”

I suppose so. Well, ГИ be pushing

along. Glad to have met you. Good-

ht," said Percy Pilbeam.
Jerry went to the door of Biff's room.
was at the basin, sponging his face.

er there was an ideal moment for
talking to him like a Dutch uncle, this
was it, but Jerry let it pass.

“Ah,” he said, relieved. "Going to bed,
ch? Quite right. Best place in the world.
for you. Go to slcep and dream of to-
morrow's hang-over.

Bill's dripping face rose from the basi
wearing a look of amazement and in-
credulity
joing to bed? Of course Рт not go-
ing to bed. Just freshening up. I'm off in
a moment to sock a cop.”

“To what?"

Sock a cop.”
‘Oh, come,” said Jerry pa
"You don't want to sock a cop.

Bill thought this over as he plied the

towel.
I's not so much а question of want-
ing to sock a cop. It's more that I fecl my
pride demands it. Do you know the cop
on the corner with the ginger mustache?"
ме seen him.'

“He's the one I've got to teach a sharp
lesson to. As I was entering Halsey
Court, he cautioned me, Cautioned me,
Jerry o' man. Said 1 was plastered and
cautioned me. We Christophers don't
e that sort of thing lying down."
"Were you lying down?"

"Certainly not. Standing as straight as
an arrow with my chin up and both feet
on the ground. The only possible thing
the man could ha iled at was that
1 was singing. And why shouldn't I sing?
"This is a [ree country,

“Oh, go to bed, B

“Can't be done, Jerry o' man. No turn-
ing back now. My regiment leaves at
dawn.”

“What do you think Kay will say if
you get jugged?”

“She'll be proud of me.”

“Have you тейестей that this police-
man may have a wife and children?”

cally.

“He has a ginger mustache.”

“But isn’t it possible that he may have
a wife and children as well?”

“I guess so, but he should have remem-
bered that earlier,” said Biff sternly, and
Jerry closed the door and turned away.
A few moments later its handle rattled
and a stentorian "Hey!" came through
the woodwor

“Now what?” said Jerry.

"I can't get out.

“No, I noticed tha

“You've locked me in

“Just the Shoesmith service," said
Jerry and made for his own room, feel-
g that he had done a knightly deed
on Kays behalf, His great love had
made him come to look on this deplor-
able brother of hers as a sacred trust.

The cubbyhole allotted to Jerry at
Tilbury House was two floors down from
the head of the firm's palatial office, and
many people would have thought it unfit
for human habitation, Jerry was one of
them. Its ink-stained furniture and evil-
smelling stuffness always lowered his
spirits. |t was not casy in such sur-
roundings to concentrate on uncongenial
work, and when toward noon on thc
follo morning the door handle
turned, indicating that someone was
about to enter amd take his mind off
Society Spice, he welcomed the inter-
ruption. A boy came in, bearing one of
those forms which visitors have to fill
out before they can approach even the
humblest Tilbury House editor. It ran:

ког Name. .. .E. B. Christopher

To see. ....Editor of Society Spice

Business. ......Terrifically urgent,
Jerry old man. Drop everything
and confer with me without a
moments delay.

nd a few

“Send him in,” said Jerry,
moments later Biff appeared, and he
braced himself for rebukes and
criminations. The haughty spirit of the
Christophers would, he knew, have been
bound to resent being immured in bed-

тс-

rooms. Before leaving Halsey Chambers
he had unlocked Ві door, but he felt
that this would have done little to al
leviate his guest's pique.

To his surprise, Biff seemed to be
no hostile mood. His manner was gra
but not unfriendly He said, “Gosh,
what a lousy office," dusted a chair and
sat down.

“Jerry о” man,” he said, “I would like
you, if you will, to throw your mind back
to last night. Tell me in a few simple
words what happened."

y found no difficulty in recapitu-
ting the facts. They were graven on
memory.

You were tight.
Sure, sure. We can take that as read.
And what occurred?”

“You staggered in, accompanied by a
weird object of the name of Pickford or
something like that.”

“Pilbeam. Most interesting fellow.
Runs a private-inquiry agency and ob-
tains the necessary evidence. What hap-
pened then?”

“You expressed a wish to go out again
and sock the policeman on the corner.”

"And then?”

“I locked you in your room."

Biff nodded.

“I thought Т had the story sequence
conecily. Well, let me tell you, Jerry o
man, that you did me a signal service.
I will go further. You saved my life. The
United States Marines never put up a
smoother job. Do you know what would
have been the outcome if you hadn't
shown a presence of mind which it is
impossible to overpraise? Ruin, desola-
m and despair, thats what the out-
come would have been. That cop would
have pinched me.”

Jerry agreed that this was what almost
certainly would have occurred, but was
wnable to understand why a seasoned
veteran of arrests like Biff should attach
such importance to what by this time he
might have been expected to have come
10 regard as mere routine.

"Well, weren't you always getting

hi

ГА

[SALE- EVERY THING MUST GO
[ET

JA
BIG BARGAIN ON
SIN

163

New York?" he said putting

this point.

чат a" said Biff, "but the difference
between me getting pinched in the old
home town three years ago and being
thrown into a dungeon below the castle
moa London as of even date is subtle
but well marked, Jerry о' man. Three
years ago, had I been escorted to the
coop, it would have set me back some
trivial sum like teu bucks. Today it
would be more like ten million
“I don't follow yor
"You will," said Bi
from his pocket. *
this is?”
“It looks like a letter.”
“And it is a letter, From the New
ork lawyers. I picked it up at Barri-
baul's jux now, and do you know
what I did when I read it? I recled.”
“Just like last night."
Biff gave him a reproving look that
aid that this was no time for frivolity.
His face was grave.
Never mind about last night, it's
today we've got to concentrate on.
Where was
“Reeling.
“Ah yes And if ever anyone was
entitled to reel, it was me. You remem-
ber the bit at the end of the cable about
me getting old Pyke's money in accord-
псе with the provisions of the trust and
letter follows?”
"I remember, This is the letter?”
“Nothing but. They said it would
follow and it followed, and you ca
take it from me that it's dynamite. Shall
1 tell you about the trust I’ve got to act
in accordance with the provisions of?
They call it a spendthrift trust, which is
a pretty offensive way of putting it, to
start with, and when you've heard what
а spendthrift trust is, you'll be astounded
that Edmund Biffen Pyke should have
countenanced such a thing. As dirty a
k to play on a young fellow trying
to get along as I ever heard of. Briefly,
the way it works out is that the trustees
stick to the money like Scotch tape,
1 don't get a smell of it till I'm d

“Well, that’s not so long to wait.
Aren't you nearly tha

Pretty nearly. In nother wi

“Then what are you worrying abou

“ГИ tell you what I'm worrying about
You haven't heard the snapper. The
provisions of this spendthrift trust are
that if I'm arrested for any misdemeanor
belore my thirtieth birthday, I don’t get
a nickel.”

The look which he directed at Jerry as
he spoke made it plain that he was ex-
pecting his words to have а
effect, and he was not disappointed.
Jerry jumped as if the chair he sat
had suddenly become incandescent. He
could not have shown more consterna-

164 tion if it had been his own fortune that

PLAYBOY

- He took a paper
Do you know what

had thus been placed in jeopardy.
“Good Lord!" he cried.

thought that would make you sit

said Biff with a certain gloomy satis

"You're sure you've got your facts
right?”
ure l'm sure, It’s all in the letter.
Couched, if that's the word, in legal
phrascology, but perfectly clear. Didn't
1 tell you I was certain there was bound
to be a catch somewhere?”

“When did your godfather make this
р”

“Three years ago. just about the time

was leaving for Paris.”

"And he never said a word to you
about it?”

"Not a word. That's what makes me
so sore. Can you imagine a man playing
а lowdown trick like that, just letting
me amble along doing what comes
naturally and then springing it on me
that if I'd been a better boy, I'd have
cleaned up but, as it is, I get nothing. It
shatters one’s whole faith in mankind.”

"Didn't he even drop a hint?

“If you could call it a hint. I saw
him before I left, and he told me to
keep out of trouble when I was in Paris,
and I said I would, and ће id га
better."
hat was all?”

That's all there was, there wasn't
any more.”
He must have been an odd sort of

“This is pretty serious, Biff.”

“You're telling me!”

“You really Jose all the money if
you're arrested?”

“No question about

“You'd better not get arrested.”

“Yes, I thought of that.”

A horrible possibility occurred to
Jeny.

“Have you be
went to Pari
Biff was able to reassure him there.

"Oddly enough, no. "Ihe cops aren't
nearly so fussy in Paris as they are in
New York. There's much more of the
live iri. But my blood
how near 1 came
шо. There was some
unpleasantness bar, and 1 socked
п agent de ville. That's why 1 moved
to London. To get away from it all, if
you follow me.

“But you weren't pi

“No, he hadn't time to pinch me.

“Well, you will be if you start doing
that sort of thing here. It's a pity you
have this urge to punch policemen.”

“It's just а mannerism.”

“Td correct 1 were you.”

“I will. I've learned my lesson. Well,
you see now, Jerry o' man, why I'm so
grateful to you for what you last

п arrested since you

night But for you, I would now be
inside looking out, and a lener would
bc following to say 1 could kiss my
heritage goodbye. Think back, and you
will recall that 1 used the expressioi
"You saved my life.’ I repeat it. How
can 1 ever repay you?"

"I don't want to be repaid.’

“OF course you do. Everybody wants
repaying. Jerry o' man, you simply must
let me give you that twenty thousand,"

“No.”

"Well, lend it to you, then.

"No."

Biff frowned at the linoleum

“I must say I don't like the way you're
refusing to enter into the spirit of the
thing. Have you nothing to suggest? 1
know. ГЇЇ back your play."

“What play:

"Haven't you written a play? I thought
cveryone had.

“Not me. I've be
this ghastly paper."

“Editing! That word puts me on the
right track. How would you like to edit
something worth-while?

“Td love it.”

“Then here's what we're going to do.
TIl start a paper and you shall run it”

"It costs a fortune starting a paper
from scratch."

Suppose Y bought a going concern

Jerry gave a litle jump. This was
opening a new line of thought.

“Do you really mean it, ВИР

“ОГ course, I mean it. What do you
think I mean? Do you know of any
going concerns?”

Did you ever hear of the Thursday
Review?”

"Vaguely. A pal of mine in Paris
takes it in. It’s politics and literature
all that slop, i:
"That sort of thing. I've had опе or

з too busy editing

g it up?"
rd the other day that
and I'd give any
thing to take on his job. It's right in my

ne. But what's the good of talking
about it? The syndicate that owns it
would sell, I suppose, if the price was
high enough, but it would cost the.
earth.

"Well, I've got the earth, or shall have
in another week, always provided I stay
out of the calaboose. And you can take
it from me, Jerry o' man, that staying
out of calabooses is what from now on
I'm going to specialize in."

Jerry drummed on the desk with hi
fingers.

"TII tell you something, Biff. Actually,
I don't think you'd be risking much. The
Thursday's always made топсу, and 1
don't believe Га let you down. And yet
+. E don't know.

Biff would have none of this cat-in-the-
adage spirit, He was all enthusiasm.

“l do. Consider it done. I have the
utmost confidence in your ability to
make the damn thing the talk of th
intelligentsia, and don't worry about
the syndicate not wanting to sell. I
know these syndicates. Once they hear
there's somebody ready to put up real
cash, they're after him like Percy Pil
beam on the track of the necessary cvi-
dence. By the way, did you know that
Percy used to edit Society Spice?"

"No, I never heard that.

“Fact. He told me last nigh

“He looks as if he would have been

ideal editor.”
He was, so he tells me. He spoke
ry highly of himself. He doesn’t think
much of you as a successor. He thinks
you fall short in dishing the dirt.”

“I've an idea my Lord Tilbury feels
the same.”

“Well, to hell with old Tilbury and to
hell with Percy Pilbeam. Harking back
to this Thursday Review thing, Vll start
the negotiations right away, and your
trouser seat will be warming the edi-
torial chair before you know where you
аге’

Jerry sat speechless, looking into the
future, It seemed to open before him
in a golden vista, and if the thought
presented. itself. that the whole of that
future depended on Biff keeping out of
the clutches of the law, it was succeeded
ng reflection that he had
so only for another week.
Even Biff, he felt, possibly a little too
optimistically, could probably do that.
now what to say" he
said. "You've rather taken my breath
kc to try to thank you——"

“Don't give it a thought.

Jerry laughed.

“That expression seems to run in the
family. It was м y said to me when
ked her for standing me a cup of
he exclaimed. "I was for-
getting her. 1 tried to phone her last
night, but she was out and all I got was.
Henry Blake-Somerset. Do you realize
that she doesn't know a thing about
whats happened? Unless you told he

“Oh, I told her. I called her up last
night from one of the bars into w
Percy Pilbeam led me, though it is pos-
sible, of course, that I was leading him.
I explained the whole setup.
Was she thrilled?"

"I think she would have been, if she
had grasped the gist. But she didn't. She
kept telling me she couldn't understand
а word I was saying and accused me —
ith some justice, I admit— of being
der the influence of the sauce. She
then hung up. I was annoyed at the
time, but I can see now that my articu-
lation may not have been as clear as I
could have wished. I seem to remember
slurring my words a little.”

“So she does

[ur

to do

“Hasn't a notion. Nor is she aware
that I've got to have that picture. The
need is pressing. All sorts of new ex
penses have cropped up, and 1 can't
waste time waiting for her to mail
me the thing. ИЛЇ have to be fetched.
Not by me, because 1 can't go to Paris
myself — that trouble with the constabu-
lary I spoke of—so everything points
to you. You'll have to pop over there.
How are you fixed for cash?”

“I've enough. And I ought to go to
Paris anyway to pick up those keys and
get my things. My unde was fussing
a good deal about his keys last night. But
how can I manage it when I'm tied down
here?"

"Won't Tilbury let you off?"

“After I've just had my holiday? No.”

"You could ask him."

"No, I couldn't."

“Then we scem to be faced with what
you might call a dilemma."

“We

There was a knock at the door. A boy
entered, bearing a letter. Jerry opened
the envelope, and laughed.

“Correction,” he said. “Tilbury
he will let me off.”
hr"

"And I'm not tied down here. This is
from the big chief dispensing with my
services.”

“He's fu

“As of tox

“Well, the old popeyed son of a what-
not," said "Still, it just shows wli
I've always said, that there's a solution
for every problem."

«d you?”

"The doorbell of 16 Rue Jacob, Paris
6, Arrondissement Luxembourg, rang i
the asthmatic way it had, and Kay came
out of her bedroom to answer it, cor
scious of a sudden chill. This, she pre-
sumed, was Henry Blake-Somerset come
to pick her up and take her to lunch
to meet his mother, who was passing
through Paris on her way to the Riviera,
nd some sixth sense told her that she
was not going to enjoy the experience.
She a photograph of Lady
Blake-Somerset in Henrys apartment
n struck by the closeness of
се to Queen Elizabeth the
First of England. It is pretty generally
conceded that, wl
, there was that about Good Queen
Bess which made it difficult for strangers
to feel at their ease with her, and she
wished Henry had forgotten all about
this luncheon date. An idle wish, for
Henry never forgot anytl

But it was not he who stood without.
It was a large young man with reddish
hair, at the sight of whom her heart gaye
a leap quite unsuitable in a heart which
should have leaped only at the sight of
her betrothed.

“Jerry!” she cried. “Well, for heav
sake! The list person 1 c:
are you doing over herc

“Business trip.” said Jerry briefly. He
was resolved to bank down the fire with-
in him and to conduct th terview on
orderly, unemotional lines. Just seeing
her had caused his own heart to skip
like the high hills, but he quickly got it
under control, though it was like having

in

atever her numerous

s
<pected. What

“I live in a pretty tough neighborhood."

165

PLAYBOY

“I suppose you'll think Гое got a hell of a
nerve ashing, but I wonder if I could use your phone?”

to discourage a large, exuberant, bound-
ing dog. “I came to get those keys at
the Lost Property Office and collect the
things I'd left in my uncle's apartment.
And Biff asked me to come and see you
because he wants me to take back a
picture of his. He said you would know
the one he me;

"He's got only onc. He isn't a col-
lector. Why does he want it?

"He's running short of money and
wants to sell it. May I come i

"I wasn't planning to keep you stand-
ing on the mat. Come right in and tell
me all your news.”

“I don't know how much you've
heard of it,” said Jerry, seating himself.
"Riff tells me he talked to you on the
phone.”

Kay laughed and, as always when she
4 this, Jerry was aware of a sensation
r to, but more pleasurable than,
that experienced by the occupant of the
clectric chair at Sing Sing when willing
ds turn on the juice.

n a way he did,” she said, “but it
was more like gargling. He had plainly
been looking on the wine when it was

166 red. 1 couldn't understand more than

about onc word in twenty, but I sccmed.
to gather that Mr. Pyke had left him
something, which was better than I had
expected. Did he tell you how much?”

“He's left him everything.”

Kay stared.

“What do you mean?”

“Just that.”

“But it sounds as if you were saying
that Mr. Pyke had left him all his money,
which doesn't make sen;

“He did.”

“You mean
ВИРУ a million

“That's righ

Kay a finger and stilled an
upper lip which was trembling, Amaze-
ment, enlarging her eyes, became her
so well that Jerry began to have doubts
as to his ability to keep the interview

You can’t mean that

“Slower than that. I want to savor

cach syllable."
"He's a millioi
“You would,
“Certainly not.

“It's really true?”

t fool me?”

"Quite true."

“Zowie!” said Kay,
liam Albert Pilbeam’s famili
the expression “Cor lumme.” There was
a tender look in her eyes as she thought
of this local boy who had made good.
The ese les which in the past had
so often caused her to talk to him like
a Dutch aunt were forgotten, "No won-
der he was celebrating. After getting
pennies from heaven like that, it
wouldn't be humane to expect him not
to be pie-eyed. Fancy Biff a millionaire!
I can hardly believe it. "This'll be good
news for his circle of acquaintances.”

Jerry nodded.

“That's what I'm afraid of. I warned
that everybody he knew would

rity with

“His little sister among the first, What
that boy is going to buy for me! There's
nothing like having a prosperous mil-
lionaire for a brother, especially a gener
ous one like Biff, I may ha d
п to state from time to time that
Edmund Biffen Christopher is as crazy
as a bedbug and ought to be in some
sort of a home, but nobody can say he
isn't gencrous.”

"Not me, anyway. Do you know what
was the first thing he said when we met?
He wanted to give me twenty thousand
pounds."

"You're kidding."

"No, it was a firm offer. Naturally 1
couldn't take it.”

"Why naturally? | know three hun-
dred and forty-seven men in Paris alone
who would have jumped at it. Yours
must be a wonderful character.”

"I believe Baedeker gives it five stars.”

“The trouble is I still can't quite be-
lieve it."

“That I spurned his gold?”

“No, that he had the gold for you to
spurn. Are you sure it's true?”

“I saw the cable from the New York
lawyers."

For some moments Kay sat silent.
When she spoke, it was to point a moral.

"You know, Jerry, there's a lesson in
this for every onc of us, and that is that
we should always be kind to the very
humblest, not that Mr. Pyke was that
by a long way, according to the stories
Гуе heard tell. If Biff hadn't saved the
old gentleman's life, I don't suppose
this would have happened. Di
know he once saved Mr.

"No, he never told me that."

"Our modest heroes. It was down at
his summer place at Westhampton
Beach. Mr. Pyke had gone for a swim.
the pool much too soo:
and got cramps and
all his clothes on and gaffed him. No
doubt the memory lingered.”

“You think that’s the expl

“It must be, be
disapproved of B

nation?"
he thoroughly
bohemian revels.

He was always having to bail him out
fter his get-togethers with the police,
and it made him as mad as a wet hen.
You'd have thought that would have
influenced him when he was making his
will.

Jerry stirred
never plea:
news.

t did, I'm afraid.”
What do you mean

As coherently as he could with her
eyes boring into him, Jerry revealed
the conditions of the spendthrift trust,
and his heart was torn as he watched the
dismay grow in those eyes.

"You mean that if he's arrested, he
ything?”
'm afraid so.

“One simple tiddly little pinch for
doing practically nothing, and he's out
millions of dollars?”

"Apparently."

"But the poor lamb's always get
pinched! He can't help getting pinched!
He'd get pinched somchow if he was
alone on a desert island. You ought
er to have left him loose in London.”

“I had to. І wanted to sec you and
tell you to go there at once and help
mc keep an eye on him. With both of us
watching him, he can't get into trouble.
I'm flying back this evening. Can you
make it, too?"

“But I've a job."

“Won't they give you a few days off?”
y reflected.

“L believe they would if 1 made a
point of it. I’m not an indispensable
cog in the machine. But I couldn't go
today. It would have to be tomorrow at
the earliest.’

“Well, that’s all right. I think we're
afe for the next day or two. Itl take him
that long to recover from the shock of
t narrow escape he had."

uncomfortably. It is
nt to have to break bad

"What narrow escape?
Jerry related in as few words as he
could manage the salient features of

what a writer of tales of suspense would
no doubt have called The Case of the
Ginger-Mustached. Policeman
‘There was an almost worship
in K

g look
^s eyes, It was not lost on Jerry.
y he could
persuade her to join him at lunch, some-
thing constructive might result. He had
much to say to her in the intimate se-
clusion of the luncheon table.

“What a mercy you had the presence
of mind to lock him in his room. At
Barvibault’s was this?"

“No, he's moved in with me at my

nk heave
shudder to d
place Ii
to keep an eye on him.
“Watch his every move.”
“Well, I don't know how to thank

for that. It makes me
ge in a
You'll be able

you. I wish there was sometl
do for you

“There is. Come and have lunch.”

SALT. . Га love to. but impos-
sible. I'm lunching with H And
there he is,” said Kay, as an asthmatic
tinkle came from the door. “TI must
be Henry. He was calling here to pick
me up and take me to Armenonville or
one of those places.”

It was Henry. He came in, kissed Kay,
said he hoped she was ready, as they
would have to hurry, and then, seeing
Jemy. started like one who perceives a
snake in his pa

ng I could

h.
“Oh, hullo," he said.

Hullo,” said Jerry.
You here?” said Her

“Just going," said Jerry, and an ob-
server, eying him as he made for the
door, would have felt that if he was not
grinding his teeth, he, the observer, did
not know a ground tooth when he saw
one.

It was some hours later, when up in
the clouds on his journey back to Lon-
don, that he suddenly remembered that
he had omitted to collect Biff's Boudin.

Biff was annoyed and in his ор
justifiably annoyed. He was not, he
an unreasonable man, he did not de-
mand perfection and could make allow-
ances when necessary, but he did feel
that when a fellow sent a fellow over
to Paris to get а picture for him, th
fellow was entitled to expect the fellow
to come back with the damned thing.
Instead of which, he went about the
place leaving it behind. Was that, he
asked, the way to win friends and in-
fluence people?

Jerry put up the best defense he could.

“1 did mention it to Kay. 1 told her
about it directly I arrived. But we got
to talking of other things, and then
Blake Somerset came in, and he made
me so mad that I just rushed out.”

“Forgetting the picture?"

"It never entered my mind.

"Such as it is. Why did he make

id not speak for a moment. He
was trying to cope with the rising feel
ing of nausea which the recollection of
that revolting scene in the living room
of 16 Rue Jacob never failed to induce.
When he did speak, his voice quivered.

"He kissed hei

This puzzled Biff.

"Very natural, surcly? It's the first
thing you do when you're engaged to a
girl, or even when you aren't, for that
matter. Good Lord!” said Biff, as a curi-
ous gulping sound proceeded from
Jenys lips. “Are you telling me you
gone and fallen in love with Kay?”

Jerry would have preferred not to be
to confide in om he
knew to be of a ribald turn of mind,

one w

but it seemed unavoidable. Curtly he
replied that he had, and Biff was surpris-
ingly sympathetic.

“I don't wonder. Even a brothers
eye can see that she has what it takes.
She's always been very popular. 7
was an art nouveau sculptor in
said he would shoot himself if she didn't
marry him. He didn't, which was a pity,
because obviously the morc art nouveau
sculptors who shoot themselves, the
sweeter a place the world becomes, Well,
well, so that's how it is, is it?”
"Yes, it is. Any objections:
"None whatever, No m in it at all,
as far as I can see. You may be the
beneficent influence which will divert
her fatheaded little mind from that
frozen fish of hers. I think with per-
severance you m
believe she seriously intends to many
that human bombe surprise. Shall Г tell
you something, Jerry? It’s just a theory,
but I believe the reason Kay teamed up
with Henry Blakc-Somerset was that he
was so ferent from all the other men
she knew. When a girl has been mixing
for two years with the sort of blots who
made up the personnel of our Parisian
circle and somebody comes along who
hasn't a beard and dresses well looks
as if he took a bath every morning in-
stead of only at Christmas and on his
birthday, something she may easily mis-
take for love awakes in her heart. But
it can't last. Given the will to win, you
should be able to cut him ош. Have
you taken any steps
“1 told her
"What did she say to that?”

"She reminded me that she was en-
gaged to Henry Blake-Somerset.”
nd the:

1 loved her."

n”
You mean you left it at that?”
“What else could 1 do?”

concerned, There came into
nner a suggestion of a father re-
buking a loved but erring son

“You'll have to show more spirit than
ibis, Jerry o' man. You seem to have
conducted your wooing like a cross be-
tween a scared rabbit and a jellyfish.
‘That's not the way to win a girl's heart.
You ought to have grabbed her and
Kissed her and gone on kissing her ШП
she threw in her hand and agreed to
play ball."

“We were talking on the telephone.

"Oh? I scc. Yes, that would be an
obstacle. And I suppose you couldn't
have done it when you saw her this last
time because Blake-Somerset was present,
which would naturally have cramped
your style. But bear in mind for yoi
future guidance what I have outlined
in the procedure if you want to get
anywhere. I've tested it a hundred times.
Meanwhile, that L am no
longer incensed because you forgot to

let me

167

PLAYBOY

bring the picture. It was an outst
boner, but if it was love that ma
pull it, I can readily understand and
forgive, because for your private files,
Jerry, L too, love. 1 told you about
Linda Rome, didn't 12"

"You said you were once engag
And were now engaged again. I've
bought the license, notified the regis
who requires a day's notice, and the
wedding will take place shortly."
"Well, that’s splendid. Congratula-
ons. How did you find he

‘Oh, very fit, thanks. A bit aloof for
а moment or two, but it soon wore off.”

"I mean, when last heard from you
were trying to get her address. Did you
get it from Tilbury's secretary?"

Er—no. No, she didn't give it to
me, I happened to run into Linda in
Bond Street, where the picture galleries
are, I'd gone there with the idea of find-
ing out the current prices of Boudins.
It seems she now works for one Gish,
who peddles paintings for a living, and
she was emerging from his joint just as
I was going in and we collided on the
doorstep.”

Embarrassing’
Not after the fist moment or two.
Everything went like a breeze. 1 said
“Hello, Linda’ and she said "Well, Vl
be damned if it isn't ВИР or words to
that effect, and after we'd kidded back
and forth for a while 1 took her off to
the Bollinger bar, where we shared a
half bot and fixed everything up. "Tim
the great healer, had done its stuff and
we were sweethearts sull. She told me
the reason 1 hadn't been able to locate
her was that she had given up her ap:
ment and was living with Tilbury out
Wimbledon. He has one of those big
houses on the Common.”

So I've heard. Didn't the secretary
tell you she was living there?
“No. No, she didn’t mention that.”
‘Odd. She must have known. But she

tan intelligent girl"

“You know her?
Not to speak to. I've seen her around
A strikingly beautiful blonde. I was only
going by her appearance when ] said

nding
de you

t-

she wasn't intelligent. Мом blondes
aren't.”
At an сапу point in the proceed

BiH had mixed himself a refreshing
drink and had been sipping it slowly
as they talked. He now drained what was
left in his glass with a gulp, and a gravity
me into his manner.

“There's something you can do for me,
Jerry. There's a little favor I'm asking
of you, which will cost you nothing but
will be of great help in stabilizing my
position with Linda.”

thought you said it was stabilized.
To a certain extent, yes, but only to

“So І should be infinitely obliged if,
when you meet Linda as of course you
will ere long, you don't bring the con-
versation around to Gwendoline Gibbs.”

“I ought to be able to manage that,
seeing that Гуе never heard of her in
my life. Who is Gwendoline Gibbs?”

“Tilbury's secretary.”

“Oh, I sce. The fellow who pointed
her out to me didn't tell me her name.
You don't want me to mention her?
If you would be so kind. I don't
mind telling you that though Linda ha
consented to go registrar'sofficing with
me, I'm still, as you might say, on appro.
She admits to loving me, but gives the
impression that she does it against her
better judgment, The least suspicion
that I am still the t ng arbutus I used
to be, and that registrar will lose а fee.
As I think I told you, it was my genle-
manly preference for blondes that led
her to sever relations a year ago, and
between ourselves, Jerry, in the couple
of d before 1
threshold I was giving Gwendolinc a
pressive rush. So
ng with Linda, you
running short of small talk, sp
her of the weather, the crops an
good books she may have read lately,
but don't fall back on Gwendoline
bbs. On the subject of Gwendoline
Gibbs let your lips be sealed.”

“PIL sec to it."

“Thats my boy. It will ease the situa-
tion greatly. Extraordinary how complex
life has become these days, is it not?
What with Gwendoline Gibbses
spendthrift trusts . - - By the w b
bury has he: bout the will. The New
York lawyers, the ones who wrote the
letter that followed, told him. Linda
happened to be in nd found
him putting i
them, all agog to get the low
describes him as turning a rich ma
and uttering cries when they
bad news, and I'm not sur-
prised. One can well imagine that the
i ion would have given him food
for thought. The next time she saw him
he told her he was going to contest the
will on the ground that the late Pyke
was cuckoo. You don't think he can
ig that, do you
don't sec how. From what you've
told me, Mr. Pyke had his eccentricities,
but nothing morc than that, and after
all he was your godfathe
And he had neither chick nor child.
which was a bit of luck for the chicks
d children, as 1 remember him."
“He probably looked on you as a son.
Kay tells me you saved his life once, and
apparently he wasn't fond of Tilbury, so
why shouldn't he leave you his money?"

Biff was silent for a moment.

There is one thing that worries me
вије, Jerry о' man, due, 1 suppose,

if, when con-

ver:

au

to that mellowed feeling of wanting to

be a do-gooder which 1 believe 1 men-

tioned to you. We can't deny that 1 owe

my present prosperity entirely to old
bury.”

such a stinker, Pyke would have left
the whole bundle. By being a stinker he
became the founder of my fortunes,
I think he ought to have his cut. I
believe ТЇЇ slip him a piece of chang

"Very generous.

“well, I want smiling faces about me.
ГШ rout out a solicitor and have him
draw up an agreement whereby in ex-
change for waiving all claim to the let
tuce Tilbury receives five percent of the
gross. Would your uncle do that for me?
Then ГЇ go and see him directly I'm
dressed. Lincoln's Inn Fields he hangs
out in, 1 think you told me."

In supposing that his telephone con-
versation with Mr. Leonard Haskell of
the legal firm of Haskell and Green
would have given Lord Tilbury food for
thought, Biff had not erred. The letter
which he found on his desk two days
later gave him more. In the course of
their transatlantie exchanges Mr. Haskell
had spoken of a letter already on its
way to him by It contained,
said Mr. Haskell, full particulars of the
late Mr. Pyke's last will and testament
and should reach him at any moment
now. And here, as promised, it w.
Lord Tilburys initial emotion on
and learning of the spend-
heartening feeling that
things were looking up. He had con-
sulted his solicitor in the matter of
contesting the will on the ground that
Mr. Pyke had been incompetent to make
one, and his solicitor had not been en-
couraging, reasoning that it was very
unlikely that a man capable of salting
away ten or so millions of dollars could
have been of weak intellect. But this
letter, with its careful exposition of the
conditions of the spendthrift trust, put
new heart into him and showed him that
all was not lost.
He knew Bifl and was familiar with

t was

his record. Surely, he felt, unless the
young wastrel had undergone a com-
plete change of character, it should be

a mere matter of days before the arm of
the law gripped him on some pretext
or other. According to Mr. Haskell's
letter, unless he had totally misread it,
arrest for even so trivial an offense as
being drunk and disorderly would be
enough to rule Edmund Biffen Chris-
topher ош. And if Edmund Bilten, ex-
hilarated by the thought of his glittering
prospects, did not become drunk and dis-
orderly at the carliest opportunity, Lord
‘Tilbury felt that he would lose his faith
in human nature.

Only when the chilling reflection came
to him that Biff, with so much at stake,
probably would have undergone a com-
plete, if temporary, change of character
did his optimism wane. Reason told him
that at current. prices for good behavior
even the most irresponsible of young
men would keep his feet glued to the
straight and narrow path.

Unless — and here optimism returned
—he were assisted off it by outside
sources. That, he saw, was an avenue
that he would do well to explore. Was
there not some way by which this prom-
ising young disturber of the peace could
be induced to get |
start disturbing it a
less at his desk, ignoring the
he should have been dictating to
ndoline Gibbs and ceasing for the
vendoline
» Lord Tilbury gave the full force
powerful intellect to the problem,
spurred on by that urge which make
all very rich men cager to add to th
riches,

For perhaps 90 minutes nothing
stirred, and then suddenly something
shook him like an electric shock. The
thought of Percy Pilbeam had flashed
into his mind, and his reaction was
somewhat similar to that of a war horse
hearing the sound of a bugle.

Pilbeam! If there was one man in
stence capable of employing the con-
ions of the spendthrift trust to the
undoing of Biff, it was Percy Pilbeam.
He had always had the deepest respect
for his former underling's ingenuity and
unscrupulousness, and he knew that if
adequately paid no one would be more
likely to see to it that the condition:
of the spendthrift trust produced practi-
alts. What steps Percy Pilbeam,
having pouched his fcc, would take he
could not say, but there was no doubt
in his mind that they would be steps of
impressive, if fishy, brilliance.

He decided to seek him out that
afternoon as soon as his duties at Til
bury House would permit, The idea of
aviting him to dinner at his club he
dismissed. He was a man rather acutely
alive to class distinctions and he felt that.
Percy, liberally pimpled and fi
the sort of clothes that made him look
like Neapolitan ice cream, would not
do him credit at his club. Better to call
and s

This was mot far
Hotel, for the Argus Inquiry Agency,
which had started in a modest way in a
single room in the Soho neighborhood,
had long since moved to Mayfair and
had cularged itself to an anteroom and
ncr rooms. One of these, the
was occupied by a couple of
stenographers: in the other, in a leather
chair which in the carly days would have
been far beyond his means, Percy Pil-

ck to normal and

^ him at his business address.
from Barribault's

two

beam sat waiting to receive clients. The
anteroom was in the charge of a gentle-
manly office boy.

Jt was to the last named that Lord
Tilbury handed his card, and the boy
looked properly impressed as he took it
in to his employer.

“Someone to see me?" asked Percy
Pilbeam, glancing up from the papers
which were engaging his attention.

"A lord to see you, sir," said the
office boy. A polished lad, he loved the
aristocracy.

Percy inspected. the card, shocked the
boy by saying, "Oh, old Tilbury? All
right, send him i d sat back in
leather chair, well pleased. He alw:
enjoyed meeting this former employe
of his, for the sight of him brought back
the days, now long past, when, like Ben

Воі Alice, he had wept with delight
when he gave him а smile and trembled
with fear at his frown. But now to him

his erstwhile boss was just another dient,
and he wondered what he had come
about.

It was not immediately that Lord
Tilbury put him in possession of the
facts, for he seemed oddly reluctant to
state his business. He said the weather
was fine, which it was. He said these
were nice offices, which they were. He
said that he had never ceased to regret
the day when Percy had severed his
connection with Tilbury House, which
was ue, adding that since Percy's de-
púrture he had not been able to find
a satisfactory editor for Society Spice.
It was left for Percy to get down to
what are commonly called. brass tacks.

“Something you wanted to sce me
about, Tilbury?”

Well — ег— yes, Pilbeam. The fact
is, I find myself in a somewhat delicate

position.”
“Pilbeam,” he proceeded, “I had a
brother named Edmund. He died re-
cently.
As far as was possible for a man with
pimples, sideburns and а small black
mustache to look sympathetic, Percy did
so. A few graceful words to the eflect
that he felt for Lord Tilbury in his
bereavement floated into his mind, but
he left them unspoken, as he did a
rather ncat line about all flesh being
rass. He did not want to delay whatever
might be that was coming next,
“He settled in America as а young
Lord Tilbury, becoming
е fluent, "and did extraordi ly
well. Toward the end of his carecr he
was one of New York's leading finan-
ders, and as the greater part of his
fortune was made before the days ol
high income taxes, he was at the time
of his death extremely rich. I do not
think I am exaggerating when I say that
his estate must amount to at | ten
million dollars."
Anything to do with moncy, pa
ticularly moncy running into the mi

lions, enchained Percy's interest.
“Coo!” he said, and whistled. “Who
gets it?”
"That is precisely what I came here

to talk to you about, Pilbeam. Naturally,
as his only surviving relative except for
a niece whom he had never met, I ex-
pected to inherit, but I do not."

"What happened? Did he lcave it all
to charities
“No.”
"Is there a widow?"

No,”

“Then why don't you collect?”

"Don't ask me!" said Lord Tilbury.
“I think he must have been insane. He

“Any chance of my borrowing the car again tonight, Dad?”

169

PLAYBOY

170 had won his heart w

made a will leaving everything he pos-
sessed to a godson of his. I get nothing.”

His hard-luck story did not really fill
Percy with pity and terror, for, like
Linda Rome, he considered that his
itor was quite rich enough already,
but he tried to infuse sympathy into
his voicc.

“Thays tough. But where do I come
in? Why did you want to sce me?"

Lord Tilbury's initial embarrasst
had vanished. He had come to the offices
of the Argus Inquiry Agency to seek aid
in a scheme which even he could see fell
under the heading of dirty work at the
crossroads, and for a while he had been
at to put it into words. But there
g about Percy Pilbeam, as
ng his mustache with
t made it easy to confide the
nd most dubious propositions to him.
You felt that he would understand and
sympathize

“I am hoping that you will be able to
help me. Have you heard of a
spendthrift trust?

Percy said he had not.

“It is the general term. the New York
awyers tell me, applied to trusts which
the beneficiary cannot dispose of in ad-
vance, I have never heard of them my-
self, but apparently they are quite usual

1 the United States, and in some states,
such as New York, all trusts have this
characteristic. Yes, yes, 1 am coming to
the point,” said Lord Tilbury, for Percy
had suggested that he should. “The point
is this: Some spendthr
provide that if the beneficiary shall com-
mit some act or behave in some manner
of which the testator does not approve,
he forfeits his rights and the money goes
to another beneficiary. It was this that
my brother specified in his will. If his
godson, a young man named Chris-
topha ested for any misdemeanor
before thirtieth thday, he forfeits
everything and the топсу comes to me
as the next of kir

Percy Pilbeam had not spoken, except
to say “Ouch!” His companion’s words
had caused him to start so abruptly that
the pen with which he was curling his
mustache had slipped and inflicted a
nasty flesh wound on his upper lip.

reluci
was somethi
he sat curl
th

ever

[t trusts further

I beg your pardon

I him that.
He was christened Edmund Billen after
my brother."

“Well, what a coincidence!
you know him?

“I was out with him only the other
night. I happened to meet him with a
gil 1 know.

He phrased the remark discreetly. It
would have been foreign to his policy
to revea

l to his visitor that the girl who

the cousin of

nyone so low in the social scale as а
private investigator, Lord Tilbury, he
knew, admired his brain amd lack of
scruple, but that did not mean that he
would welcome him as a member of his
family. Time enough to tell him after
the wedding.

“He kept saying he was a millioi

money and just felt like a millo,
He took mc on a pub crawl. You should.
have seen him put the stull away."

“He drank heavily?”

“TI say he did.”

“How tory.” said Lord
‘Tilbury, beaming. “Then you are the
man to help me. I knew I was not mak-
ing a mistake in coming to you, my dear
Pilbeam.

very

“But why me
“Because 1 have such confidence in
your brains and ingenuity, Pilbeam. 1

thought (d
this young Christophers acq
and — cr — well, you see what I had
mind. And now I find that vou already
know him. Things could not be more
satisfactory.

He had no need to enlarge on
point. Percy Pilbeam might wear side-
burns and a Neapolitan-ice-cream suit,
but he was quick at the uptake.

“I see what you mean. You want me
to have another night out with the fcl-
low and get him ght.”

"Exactly.

"So that he'll do something to make
him get pinched by the police and lose
the money according to the terms of
the trust and you'll collar the whole ten
million;

"You put these things so de:
beam. That is just what 1 w
to do.”

“And wh
it for me

Lord ‘Tilbury, knowing his Pilbeam,
ted that this query would be
and he had stecled himself to

He never enjoyed paying out
but he knew that if you do not
speculate, you cannot

“A hundred. pounds.

“Or, rather,” said Percy, ^a thousand.”

Lord Tilbury was seated at the mo-
м, so he did not sway and totter,
but his jaw fell and his eyes protruded
the sight of a blonde. He

at you might somehow make

y, Pil-
t you

said Percy, “is there in

sped.
A thousand!"
“An insignificant
you will be getting.
"Two hundred, Pilbeam.”
A thousand.”
€ hundred."
“A thousand was what I said. No, on
second thought, make it two thousand."
Lord Tilbury breathed heavily. Hi:
face had taken on the purple tinge of
which Linda Rome had spoken. He

percentage on what

looked like a toad which was not only
beneath а harrow but suflering from
high blood pressure. But gradually the
purple flush faded. The healing thought
had come to him that as this convers:
tion was taking place without witnesses
t, he could always later on
iate any promises to which he mi
imself. It was surely unlikely th
m would do anything so crude as
10 insist on. 1 agreement.
Very well,
You a
1 do."
“Then we'll just have а little written
agreement,” said Percy, He took up the

pen with which he had fondled his
mustache and wrote rapidly on а pad.
He rang а bell, and the gentlemanly

olfice boy entered. “Oh, Spenser,” he
a and Marlene to

come

two stenographers made their
appearance, witnessed the document and
withdrew. They were both attractive
young women, but Lord Tilbury, a
watched. them. append. their
thought he had never seen two moi
repulsive members of their sex. But it
is ло be doubted if even Gwendoline
Gibbs would have scemed attractive to
him, had she been rendering legal a
document which was going to reduce
bank balance by two thousand
pound
“And now,” said Percy, “I'll tell you
what Гап going to do. I'm going to get
hold of Joe Murphy.”
“1 beg your pardon?
“And inwoduce Christopher to him.
Murphy is a man I know in Fleet Street
who has the most astonishing capacity
for absorbing alcoholic liquor. He's
mous for it. Nobody can have an cve-
ning with Joe and not feel the effects.
And we know what happens to Christo-

pher when he has a few drinks. He
wanted to wind up our night out by
punchi policem

“And you restrained him!"

“Well, how was I to know? But it'll
met

be all right this time, After he
Murphy he's bound to end up punch
someon
of course.
“No, no.”
“seill,
mick.”
“Quite.”
“So there we are.
"So there we are," echoed Lord Til
bu

even а

the

will do

The expression "It's in the bag” w
not familiar to him, or he would cer-
nly have used it.

This is the first of two parts of P. G.
Wodehouse's new novel, “Вет Mil
lions" The conclusion will appear ne

month.

MONEYGRABBERS (continued from page 101)

Burns opened a store in midtown
Manhattan and prospered moderately.
‘Then, a few years ago, he decided to
retire and bought a home in southern
Florida where he lives now in sunny
case with a comparatively untroubled
consci ed by the absolution
granted him by the surety company and
his former employer. The pneumatic
tube system for changemaking at his
former employers has long since di:
ppeared. [t was much too simple to
emulate the silent-partner gambit.

‘The strangest specimen in my collec-
tion is nameless, faceless —and much
sought after. I have several rival English.
collectors who are also after him. They
have certain advantages: this specimen
was English and operated in London.

He took the British government for

about $150,000 in the years 1871—1872
when the money was the equivalent of
one million untaxed dollars today. When
Scotland Yard finally caught on to his
crime and his methods the statute of
limitations on prosecution had long run
out. Not only couldn't they touch him,
but they even had to continue his pen-
sion as a retired civil servant. Tt must
have been terribly frustrating.
Jones is as good a name for him as
any. In 1870 he was 38 years old and
an employee of the General Post. Office
working in the stock-exchange branch
on Threadneedle Street, а shilling's
throw from the Bank of England. Jones
was almost ceztainly a supervising clerk
and his specialty was telegrams. Four
thousand telegrams a day were sent
from this G.P.O. branch, mainly by
stockbrokers — to clients, banks and
other brokers.

The procedure was th After each
telegraphic message was writtel
blank form, it was handed to a clerk at
the counter in the post office — Jones,
for example. He would count the words
and tell the sender the cost. Most wires
were at the minimum rate of a shilling
for 20 words. Jones would ask for the
shilling and give the sender his telegram.
and a new shilling postage stamp. The
sender would lick the back of the stamp,
paste it on his telegraph form and hand
k to Jones. He would then cancel
rubber hand stamp and give
the message to a telegrapher seated at
4 key in the center of the room.

If you have just a Ше clever larceny
in your heart you know how Jones
handled this; but if all you can think
of is the thieving tollbooth agents
cadence “one for the house and one for
* you do Jones a great injustice, He
made his own shilling stamps.

The shilling stamps bore a left-profile

ce, so]

on a

me

portrait of a youthful Queen Victoria
Jones’ counterfeit wasn't bad. He didn't
bother trying to duplicate the water
mark on the back, but what ordinary
stamp uscr would try to find out if
there was one on the stamp before pay-
ing over his shilling?

Hard-working, eager, efficient Jones
probably could have handled a thousand
telegrams a day. A thousand shillings
ay is about $250 a day; six days a week
brings it to $1500 а week ог 578,000 а
year! He was at it about two years, or
$156,000 worth. Let us gencrously allow
$6000 for paper, artwork and the hiring
of certain tech al nce,
leaves Jones with a thumping 5
Tor his excellent idea and devotion to
duty in the stock-exchange post office,

He wasn't greedy. Late in 1872 Jones,
now 40, decided to retire — on "grounds
of ill health, па he began drawing a
ll but steady pension. Not Гог him
piciously hasty farewell to his fellow
id a trumped-up story about ir

fortune from an uncle

which

Austral

The post office got a clue to Jones’
homemade shilling stamps in 1898 when
a young stamp dealer, Charles Nissen,
discovered a lack of watermark and
several crudities im a batch of shilling
stamps on old telegraph forms. But noth-
ing came of that investigation. Then, in
1910, a larger batch of canceled Jones
stamps turned up. These, too, had bee
canceled the stockexchange post
office- R- G. Waldegrave, then
Accountant General of the post office,
visited Jones, who was 80 and still draw-
ng his pension. What happened at the
interview? In January 1938, Waldegrave
provided a tempered, discreet account.
He used no names, of course. He called
Jones “the official who, to put it no

higher, would have had the most obvious
opportunity of disposing of the forged
stamps to the public. He retired in
1872 at the age of 40 on grounds of ill
health. He was interviewed — one would
like to know his emotional reactions to
the news that the interview was to take
place — but if he had any secret which
he might have revealed, he did not reveal
it, either then or during the further
years of his life

Jones, Nissen and Waldegrave are
di now, but the mystery persists.
Waldegrave's kin have been questioned
many times. Once or twice a year, rather-
too-casual inquirers would like to know
if they could check on the postoffice
employees who retired in 1872 on
grounds of ill health. The records, alas,
are buried in a cellar in Yorkshire and
cannot be consulted. The results of the
post olfice's 1898 and 1912 investigations
are still secret

London philatelists I've talked to at
“The Royal Philatelic Club have nothing

but admiration for Jones. To all of

them. his work is still the most audacious
fraud of its kind ever perpetrated. They
don't know where Jones is buried, but
they've given him an impressive monu-
ment. You will find it in the authorita-
tive Encyclopedia of Philately by Robson
Lowi

1871. The one-shilling plates, 5
and 6, have been forged and arc
known as the Stock Exchange lo
geries: they are worth many time
the price of the genuine stamp.

In a very short time, Jones made a
great deal of money and retired while he
was young enough to enjoy it. But in
death he enjoyed an even greater ù
umph. His homemade stamps, bereft of
watermark and filled with many crudi-
ties, are great treasures for the collector.
His stamps fetch as much as $40 each.
The government's own pucka Victoria

171

PLAYBOY

shilling stamp of 1871 is worth about 50
cents.

In the strange world of philately the
successful counterfeits — those actually
used for postage—are always worth
more than plain, honest originals. Mil-
lions of young collectors, whose mo
fiber isn't completely warped by this
revelation, will be better prepared [oi
in adult world in which, alas, Crime
Olten Pays Well.

1 dincd out one winter in New York
largely on the tale of Bernardos great
success. Here was a criminal with an
almost foolproof scheme who was now
netting $2,000,000 a year and couldn't
be arrested. Inevitably, cime the stock
question: If it was so casy, why weren't
others doing it?

Others were doing it, I explained. But
Bernardo was the most successful, the
shrewdest and the most careful. He had
experience and some of the most valu-
able gold contacts in the world. You
don't come by those in any cram course.
1 preface the tale with these cautionary
remarks, because in
nardo's operation sounds almost too
easy.

Bernardo is 56 and is an Argentine
citizen who now lives in Swiverland. He
maintains comfortable apartments іп
Geneva and Zurich. He is bald, benignly
plump and has never handled a gun i
his life, He's never been arrested, in-
dicted or even held on suspicion, and so
it is necessary to provide him with a
else Nirt with libel.

last name or

false

Be
his calling ad several Swiss
banks, citadels of infinite discretion, are
pleased to have him as a client. There
is nothing crim bout what B
do does in Switzerland. Only Indi

considers Bernardo Reis a dangerous
criminal.
Reis is the world's most successful

ster smuggler of gold. In an average
ycar, his agents carry about four tons of
gold — around 120,000 ounces — to India,
the gold sink of the world. Reis nets
nearly $20 an ounce. Two or three times
а year his carriers are seized by Indian
customs officials and the 50 or 60 pounds
of gold each carries—worth $40,000-
550,000 — is confiscated.

Gold is India's national curse. Money
that should be used to build factories or
purchase needed m
instead, invested in hi
harvest, millions of farmers buy gold
which is converted into bracelets and
rings worn by the farmers’ wives — until
they need money the following spring
for planting. Or the gold is simply

hinery abroad is,
arded gold. At

buried. The rupees used to pay for the
gold are sent abroad, converted into

172 foreign currencies and thus become a

debit item in India's balance of trade.
Indian authorities believe that in the
past decade some 15,000,000 ounces —
about 83 tons — ol gold have been smug-
gled into India. Bernardo is probably
responsible for ncarly hall, or 40 tons.

There are lots of amateurs in the
business, includiug airline personnel
and foreign diplomats who are caught
eventually. Bernardo Reis never gets
caught

His system starts with the personnel
department, run by his son who has
nts all over Europe looking for
likely carriers. They must be ordinary
Joes, steady job holders who've never
been in trouble. About onc of three is
tempted by the offer of а fast $1500
plus a free t Usually they
make the trip din vacation,

Once he's been checked out carefully,
the carrier is fitted with а spec
hugging vest which will hold fr
to 60 pounds of pure gold. He also gets
a custom-made suit, skillfully tailored to
conceal the bu 1 cover story of why
he is stopping in India although his
destination appears to be Australia, M.
laya or Japan. He's warned of what will
happen to him and his family if he
should try a double cross.

Just before he leaves, the carrier has
his special vest fitted with the small gold
bricks of .996 fineness purchased in a
perfectly legal transaction from the
Union des Banques Suisses. The carrier
gets a round-trip ticket to Tokyo or
Singapore and is accompanied by a R
agent to Milan or Paris for the real
beginning of the journey. (Travelers to
India coming directly from Switzerland
are always under suspicion.) En route
the carrier is under surveillance by other
Reis agents who make sure he doesn’t
get any ideas. Meanwhile, Reis has sent
a coded message to his Bombay agents
describing the carrier, the exact amount
of gold he has, and his flight number.

Indian officials want to encou
tourists and they do not ћ
unduly. So they do not use
inspectoscope indiscriminately. The odds
definitely favor the first-time carrier.

Once past Bombay customs. the car-
rier goes to a designated hotel where
the Reis agent relieves him of the gold
and weighs it carefully. The carrier is
paid his fee — based on the weight of the
gold—and is then free to return (0
Europe. Ш he's caught, a prominent In-
п solicitor will appear with bail to
get him out of jail. A few days later the
smuggler will leave India, forfeiting his
bail. Of course, he can never be a carri

lé:

y;

As long as Switzerland keeps a free
market in gold and as long as Bernardo
Reis keeps out of India, there is a
chance in the world he will ever be ar-
rested and tried for be
gler in the world today.

the most suc-

cessful sm

Are there any smudges on Reis’ hon.
zon? Well, he thinks that, once or twice,
Indian agents have tried to kill him by
running him down.

He isn't accepted socially in Geneva,
but then, few foreigners are. On the
whole, as he once put it with cloyin
modesty, “It isn’t a bad life, you know."

The secking of social acceptance is one
of the curious strivings these five success-
ful criminals had in common. Probably
the shillingstamp counterfeiter,
ause his crime wasn’t suspected
until he was 80. José Beraha has the
problem to a certain extent in Vienna.
n I first met him, an old friend of
n engineer, acted as our interpreter
Toward the end he said, “For God's
sake, keep me out of the story. It
wouldn't help my career to be known
asa friend of a counterfeiter.” He spoke
in English, but somehow Beraha sensed
what he had said and smiled sadly. "There
have been more pointed smubs since
then, but Beraha has grown philosoph-
ical about them. His wife is somew!
more sensitive about this, though.

In Florida, the silent ner of the
big store in New York is visited occ
sionally by old cronies who mix doses of
envy and scorn, as only old friends can.
Smith, the blackmailer, left a residue of
small doubts in the suburban commun-
ity he settled in. When I visited it after
his death, a neighbor said he never liked
Smith. “Just one of those things. He re-
minded me of ired pimp. And he
laid on that ‘niece’ routine a little too
thickly. He wasn’t kidding us.

The need to fit firmly into a comfort:
able middle-class environment is the
great weakness, then, of our succe
criminals. Lack underworld ties wh
any ordinary selbrespecting crook would
have, these exemplars invariably seck
gilded respectability after they've made

Once, in Munich, 1 met Eliaza B
better known as “Cicero,” the extraordi-
nary valetspy of World War II who
filched secrets from his master, the Br
ish Ambassador to Turkey. Idly, 1 asked
па if he had thought of fleeing to.
Rio de ] о after he quit, just as his
film portraycr, James Mason, did in Five
а looked puzzled. “Brazi
But 1 don't know anyone th

I just med you to know that eve
after you've pulled the perfect crime and
gotten away with the loot, there are si
peculiar little problems society will pose
for you.

“The greatest crimes," Aristotle wrote
9900 ycars ago, "arc not committed
order to acquire the necessary, but the
superfluous.” Middle-class respectability.
for example. Maybe the slogan should
be changed to “Crime Does Pay — But
Who Can Afford 12"

Fingers.

Mere does it bay nad
(continued from page 100)

“Do you believe in God?" Shreck said.
"Only for His sake,” Adams said.
"hen you believe in Him as an act of
charity."

“Only a:
of His child

"Das
eva

“Why
“Do you believe in God?”

1 don't even believe in spirituals.”
"Do you believe in God:
“As Holy Ghost or fount of wisdom?"
“Do you believe in God?"

“Can I lie on the couch?"

“Do you believe in God?"

“As carpenter, transcendental trans-
vestite or inventor of the meson?”
believe in God?"
elorec, almighty hipster

white man, I am not one

Mer Him ask

id Shreck in
t to lie down
even know.

ou make me
own couch. You d
what's good for the race.
How the hell do you know 1 don't
know whats good for the race?”
OK, you're a smart nigger, tell me
what's good for the racc.
“Don't call me that!”
“Don't call you wi
“Don't call me a smart nigger!”
"Why not? Don't I have the same
privileges as anyone else?”
Goddamnit! You're my psychiatrist,

here four months, right you

expect me to lose my prejudices.”
"You're supposed to treat me with

respect.

ect?” Shreck
ng with
you with respect, you'd lose
confidence in me. Do you think that
would be good for my ego? A nigger
down on someone who studied
ng a psy-
chiatrist doesn't need, it's an insecure
psychotic. 105 hard enough
treat а secure psychotic. Do you th
it’s a pleasure cruise tr
psyche with only a toilet plunge
divining rod? I tell vou it's messy!

As Shreck talked, Adams threw |
sell down on the floor and started a
series of vigorous push-ups. On the ninth
push-up he said, “So is your couch.”

Can I help it? 105 crawling with the
vermin of dirty dr wreck replied.

"In the brochure it said you had a
reupholstered couch,” Adams said on the
12th push-up.

“I didn’t write the brochure,” Shreck

arose from
“TE

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174

said. "Do you think I believe everything
you tell me?"
We're supposed to lie," Adams said
on the 15th push-up. "It's your job to find
out the truth.
“Why should it be my job? Every pa-
tient thinks he has to lic. That's the
trouble with you nuts. You have no
sense of honor, no conception of decency.
If your own mothers heard what vou
said about them, they would be out-
raged. Has it ever occurred to you what
it costs for shock treatment? Do you
know what my electric bill is every
month? Of course you don't. You don't
even care. All you care about is rapid
transference.
Adams finished doing his exercises. He
turned over on his back, intertwined his
fingers and rested his head on his hands.
His voice became drowsy. "1 wish I was
back at Ole Swance. 1 used to go to
Greck IA with two United States mar-
shals. One of ‘em got so he could recite
the whole Greek alphabet. "They were
learning more than I was. The first week
I was there 1 got a telegram from the
president of Liberia, the prime minister
of Sierra Leone and the queen of Greece.
1 got those all in my scrapbook. A dele-
housewives supported.
ntegrity, The wife of a

my courage and
famous Tennessce judge offered to meet
me in New Orleans for some special

ntation exe Т was the white
hope of the colored community. Man, I
was on top of the heap! "Why'n't you
ack to Africa where you belong,
дег!” they screamed at me. ‘Join the

monkeys in thc trees, blackboy! they

shouted. 'You ain't gonna stay alive to
make it, jigaboo! they hollered at me.
And you know, Shreck, I wanted to
scream right alongside of ‘em. I wanted
to cry, ‘Nigger, get back to Mau Mau-
ville. You don't b'long up hyah with
the white folks. You got no right bringin"
your stink into this Grecian temple of
ш. You oughta be up there
swingin’ from an oak like Spanish moss,
like that strange fruit? Man, the ofays
woulda loved it. Booth Adams coulda
been the first Nigra in memory to be in
favor of white supremacy.” He quie talk-
ing and turned to Shreck. "Ain't that
right, Doctor?”
‘You came dose to mal
Booth,” Shreck said softly.

Adams sighed. “As it turned out I just
ended up being a disgrace to my people.

"What people are yov talking about
said Shreck.

“The blacks."

“You weren't a disgrace to the blacks.
You were a disgrace to the whites, If the
blacks can only be a disgrace to them-
selves, they can never disgrace anybody.
If you're going to take disgrace profes-
sionally, you can't draw the color line.”
Shreck came over to him, got down on
his knees and jutted his jaw forward.
id 1 shave close enough?” he asked,
olfering his jowl for inspection.

Adams rubbed his fing; under Dr.
Shreck's jaw. “You're as smooth as а
baby's bottom," he said.

Shreck got to his feet. "1 made a date
with one of the female patients tonight.
Tm going to hold her hand while she's
in thermal therapy,” he said gaily

“Have a ball, Shreck," Adams said.

g history,

Although it had become quite dark in
the room, Shreck did not turn on the
light above the basin when he went to
thc mirror to look at
think a young twenty-three-year-old folk
nger called Elodia Gloralee Hinch
could fall in love with a middle-aged
shrink?" Dr. Shreck asked his patient.

‘Sure, Shreck," Adams said feclingly.
“But don't let her plug in that electric
gectar while she's in that tub."

"I'm not a bad shrink, am 1, Booth?”

"You're the greatest headshrink I ever
knew, Alon:

“Do you mean that, Booth?”

“I really mean it, Alonzo.

“Rut do you feel it, Booth?”

“I feel it, I feel it.'

“You're not lying to me, Booth?”

“T don't think so.

Shreck's voice lowered conspiratorially.
"Im going to let you in on a secret,
Booth, that I haven't shared with anyone
else.

"Yeah?" Adams raised himself on one
elbow.

"You're on the road to recovery,"
Shreck said, measuring each word with
care.

Мег”

"Every evidence points to your
curability

"It docs?"

“Its unmistakable.

"How can you tell?

"Rec ime we have a session
I feel better,” Dr. Shreck said, snapping
his leg up suddenly to make a cracking
sound in his knee.

"But I'm the patient,” Adams pro-
tested.
Who's
natively.

"Wasn't I the one who cracked up at
Oxford, Mississippi?

"A trifling fact, Booth. When you
cracked up at Oxford, 1 bled for vou.
No man is an island, my friend, as Ernest
Hemingway said before he cracked up in
Spain."

о when do I get out of here?”

It depends on how 1 feel. It depends
on my equilibrium, my sense of security.
It may even depend on Elodia Cloralce
And
here Dr. Shreck gave Booth Adams a
lecring wink.

"You're going to make it, Alonzo. I
can feel it!" Booth Adams lcaped to his
fect and began skipping an imaginary
rope.

"You're making me feel better every
minute, Booth,” Dr. Shreck said joyously.
“And the better 1 бесі, the closer you
are to recovery, my boy.”

And hearing these therapeutic words,
Booth Adams hurtled over the confes-
sion couch and trotted out of the room,
his Oxford scarf waving behind him.

to tell?” said Shreck rumi-

Hinch and her capacity for love

NIGHTMARE

(continued from page 86)
k had been at the right place at the
right time, but Cal could not tell the full
story. Operations ol agents abroad were
never revealed, not to anyone.

The CIA director entered the room
and took the last chair. He fidgeted like
a worried banker, and Cal knew he had
read the Melanie message. "Since the
test,” Cal continued, “the Chinese have
been able to assemble six weapons. The
yield of the test was fifty kilotons, which
15 pretty efficient. Our information is that.
they've rigged the test type with U-238,
so each of the six will produce a yield of
a half megato ewhere along the
line the Chinese physicis must have

arned а lot from the Russians But
they've had trouble with their breeder
is all theyre
going to be able to make for a while. But
with six they plan to start — and win а

Som

ignal to halt, “That’s crazy!” Air said.
"How do they expect to fight a war with
They don't even have adequate

six nuc

delivery systems— no ICBMs, no long-
bombers, no missile subs. Hell,
reach us!”

; they can't eve
“I didn't say fight ам

it. All they have to do to win it
you sec, or at least that’s the way they
jure. A number of years ago Chou En-
At the end of the next war the
population of the United States will be
10,000,000, of Russia, 15,000,000, and of
China, 360,000,000 people’ " He looked
Thompson. "I believe I've quoted him
curately.”

Thompson said, “That’s the guts of it,
Cal.

Chou was foreign ministe
inued. “Now Ix
The figures may have changed a little —
China's population has jumped а hun-
dred million since then, and ours has
increased а lot and so has Russia's, and
the number and. power of nuclear weap-
оп» has increased. too, and in greater pro-
porüon. But Chou's hasn't
changed a bit, except that it is now spe-
cific and immediate."

They were all very quiet. Cal held up
his hands, six fingers extended. "Six

lai 5

the
premier.

tim ‘al con

ic

weapons. and here's how they're going to
usc them:
“One — they blow Amoy, one of their

own cities, after starting a new fi
Quemoy and Matsu. They will make mo-
ions as if actually preparing to
Formosa, but they won't invade. They
won't have to.

“Two — they lay a nuc on Taipeh and
another on Manila. A half-meg weapon
will simply obliterate cities that size.
They have medium-range jets perfectly
adequate for the job.”

He turned to the map board, found
six red rosettes, and pinned three on the
targets he had named. He continued:
“Three — nuclear mines in three Soviet
cities — Vladivostok and. Nikolaevsk, on
the Pacific, and Khabarovsk, the biggest
military and industrial complex in the
Eastern provinces.” Rosettes bloomed on
the Russian cities.

Cal faced the table ар;
One-Two-Thrce Plan.

it?

n. “That’s the
Beautiful, isn't

"So simple,” said General Caudle.
“And so diabolical.”

All the others, except the director,
were staring at him, puzzled, and Cal
knew he would have to explain a bit
further. “They expect this will touch olf
war between Russia and the United
es and that we will destroy each
This tactic is nothing new with
he unconsciously used the
term by which the Chinese refer to their
own people — “nor is it new in Europe.
Remember Metternich and Machiavelli.
It is as old as the role of agent provoca-
teur. And it will wor

“How?” Senator Clive

»apped out the

“It can work in the first stage. The
U.S. S. R. has pledged itself to retaliate
if C is attacked. The U. S. S. R. may

act the instant Amoy goes up.”

“Why would the Chinese want to de:
stroy one of their own cities?”

“First, it will eliminate Russian sus-
picion at the outset. Secondly, one city
is a small price to pay for the world. The
Han may be resigned to losing two- or
three hundred-million people, and aren't
urbed so long as technical, scientific
and political cadres survive.

"Whether or not the Russians str
America in supposed retaliation for
Amoy, the bombing of Manila and Tai-
peh will follow in two hours. When that.
happens you can imagine the r
this country. We would face a

ion. Unwarned, we might decide the
loon was up and push the button.
Му we would have to hit the Chi-
nese air bases with all the stuff we have
on Formosi. If the Russians were hesi-
tant after Amoy, they would know for
certain China was under attack after
Phase Two.

"And if Phases One and Two weren't
sufficient. catalysts,
ippearance of
— would touch olf everything in the
U.S.S.R., and that, of course, would
spring all our missiles. And SAC would
have been in the air ever since Amoy
went up. That is it, gentlemen,”

The AEC Commissioner winced. "How
do you know all this?” he demanded.

“We've tailed those six nucs ever since
they left Lanchow. With the help of
Navy Intelligence, and a big assist from
our cousins, thc British, and — well, a

dec

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PLAYBOY

176

few neutral friends.” Cal thought of the
Indonesian physicist who had learned his
trade at Caltech, but of course didn't
mention him.

“One went to Amoy. Believe it or not,
they shipped it in a coffin. A fractional-
megaton weapon is just about man-size.
Two went to Shanghai. At the same time
two merchant ships were in dry dock

for hull modification — antisubmarine
equipment, the rumor was. Actually,
minclaying chutes were installed. Those

two ships sailed five days ago, headed
north. The weapons are aboard.”

The admiral said, "Correct.

“Two more,” Cal continued, “are on
airfields near Swatow. They're the ones
programed for Taipeh and Mani

‘The Army Secretary said, “That leaves
Khabarovsk. That's inland. How do they
do Khabarovs

“I didn't know the answer to that until
a [ew hours ago," Cal said, "although we
knew the sixth nuc had been trucked to
Haokang. It is now buried under a cargo
of hides on a barge floating down the
Amur River to Khabarovsk. How soon
the One-Two-Three Plan becomes оре
tional depends on how fast the Amur
flows. and at this season it flows at four
knots. Just as a guess, that barge should
tie up in Khabarovsk in forty-eight to
seventy-two hours

The Undersecretary of State let out a
great breath, audibly. The Deputy Secre-
tary of Defense rested his elbows on the
table and prodded at his brows. The
Senator said, “It’s terribly disturbing.
But isn't it only analysis and deduction?
Do we really know?

“We really know,

“How do we knov

“We have the full de
lutely reliable source ate with the
Peking leaders." А nice double-entendre,
Cal thought.

Dr. Quale, I think on a matter of
this magnitude we must know more than

that about your source.
The CIA director rose. He was nci
s necessary

to know him for a time to discover that
he was very tough, and very wise. He

said, "Senatoi I can tell you
morc. This same source told us the Chi-
nese were about to enter the Korean

War, and when and with what. This
source gave us advance notice of the in-
ion of Vietnam and the

filu
of India. This source provided u:
first word of the ideological split betw
Peking and Moscow, This source must be
protected. Does that answer your ques-
tion, sir?"

“I've been answered," the Senator

id.

al Caudle said, “And your recom-
mendation, Dr. Quale?

^L think that first—and right now —
we have to tell the U. $. S, R.”
ral turned to the Undersecre
- “Will they believe us?
t know," State sid “Its a
gamble — unless we, or they, get hard evi-
dence. But 1 think we must tell them."

The Army Secretary tapped the table.
“Just before 1 left the Pentagon," he
d, "we got a message from Taipeh.
"he Communists are shooting up Qu
moy and Matsu again. Two hundred
shells in four hours. That's about average
for one of their shoots. But it could be
the first sound, like distant thunder be-
yond the hor

Then they were all quiet, and Cal
knew he had conducted his briefing cred-
itably and that without ever speaking
they had reached a conclusion, a meeting
nds. It was a conclusion only, not а
decision. They were decisior but
this decision thev could not make, even
collectively. On the gravest matters of
forcign and military policy, action and
responsibility must always rest in the
hands of the President. So Ше Constitu-
tion decrees.

The GIA director said what they were
all thinking: “This is the reason we've
got the hot linc between the Kreml
and the White House. Well?”

The general looked up at Cal and
said. “I guess you'd better walk across
the street with me, We've got to see The
Man."

Cal got home at midnight.

The next night he didn't go home at
Jl, and called from the shop to say he
is sleeping on his office couch. On the
night following, he went home at three,
and managed not to wake her.

Then, on the fourth night, he got home
for dinner. He flopped into a chair with
a highball and looked about him. Every-

s lamiliar looked strange,
he realized that this was the first
long stretch of time that he had
really scen his home, his books, his pe
sonal and immediate surroundings, and
his wife.

Judy had been absorbing the news on
television. "Did you hear about those
two Chinese ships?" she said. “Torpe-
doed, or so they claim."

"Is that so?

“Yes, it is. And of course the Chinese
me us. Did we do i

-1 hope not. I think somebody else
did iL" He knew the Russians had done
it. First they'd intercepted that barge
floating down the Amur, seized the crew
and confiscated the nuc. Then they'd
torpedoed the two ships bound for Vla-
divostok and Nikolaevsk, and after that
they'd wld the Chinese that the explo-
sion of any weapon, anywhere, would be
considered an attack by China on the
Soviet Union.

"You're being secretive again,” Judy
said. "I think we must've done it. But if
we did it, why did the Russians recall
their ambassador from Peking? What's
going on, anyway? Is this another crisi

"No. If there was a crisis, it's over.”

“I hope you're telling me the truth.”

"I am. No crisis . . . not this time.”

That same night they were listening
to the 1-o'clock news and a Hong Kong
correspondent quoted a bulletin from
Radio Peking: “Mai Sin-ling, a notorious
Eurasian prostitute and a paid agent of
the American Hed herself
with poison to prevent arrest today.
Others in her ring are being hunted.”

‘al turned his face to the pillow. He
would never sce her again, or discover
why she did it. She could not be replaced,
and yet her loss was not unexpected and
he had lost agents before. It was the
nature of his business.

Judy poked him with her elbow.
“What's the matter with you?" she asked.
othiug. I'm going to sleep."

“No more nightmare
No. Just sleep. Peaceful sleep.”

1064 PLAYBOY ALL-STARS (continued from page 120)

even become bold enough to borrow the
themes of staid and venerable Russian
folk songs. Music students at the Mos-
cow Conservatory carn extra rubles on
weekends by turning up in jazz combos
at private clubs. Foreign troupes, like
one here now from that citadel of “re-
Yugoslavia, are expanding
the frontiers of jazz music still farther.

At the third Leningrad Jazz Festival,
units from Riga, Tallis and Tartu cn-
tered the lists as champions of “West
Coast style." Russian names began to
appear in the Down Beat International
Critics Poll; and in a further response
to the expansion of jazz in the Soviet
Union, Radio Liberty this past summer
broadcast to the U.S.S.R. a program by
eight American jazzmen (coded by Phil
Woods and Bill Crow) of pieces com-
posed by Russian jazz musicians.

"Ehe sixth annual Polish Jazz Jam-
borec Warsaw in late October sched-
uled a jazz opera—an innovation no
American jazz festival has yct contem-
plated. During the Fourth Jazz Festival
Bled, a Yugoslavi: у the combos
atati rom Sarajevo,
Munich, Prague, Buda-
pest and Ljubljana (one nighters were
evidently not completely obsolete yet)

In the news of jazz abroad this past
year were examples of fascinating cul-
tural blendings. American trumpeter
Don Ellis, visiting in Warsaw, reported
he had heard a Russian who sounded
“like a country blues р who studied
with Prokofiev.” In Japan, one resource-
ful group evolved à jazz fantasy based
on a Japanese religious theme. And in
the most unusual cultural exchange in
jazz history, the Albert Mangelsdorff
Quintet, one of Germany's lead
ета jazz units, was hired by the €
government to undertake an
sponsored tour of Asia. Its concerts were
nclude jazz versions of indigenous
amelang music of Bali
va, Indian тараз, koto music of
apan, and some jazz compositions by
ing Phumiphon Adundet of Thailand,
Meanwhile, as American critics con-
tinued to argue about the extent of
African survivals in early jazz, more out-
posts of contemporary jazz were estab-
lished in West Africa. The Jazz Arts
Society opened nch in Nigeria; and.
under the aegis of the American Society
ol African Culture, jazz pianist-composer
Randy Weston made a second trip to
Nigeria where he lectured at schools
and sat in with local mu: ns. Weston.
claimed that a previous visit to Africa

had deeply affected his own conceptions

of jazz and he had a Colpix album
(Music from the New African Nations)
to prove it. Weston proceeded to set up

an exchange program of musical infor-
mation and tapes with Nigerian m
cians, predicting that ап increasing
segment of American jazz would bc
swayed by African rhythms and melodies.
As the ranks of jazzmen multiplied
abroad, the 1963 obituary list im this
country was unusually long. In New
Orleans, it included blues shouter Lizzie
Miles and trumpeter John ir, long-
time leader of the Young Tuxedo Brass
Band. Also from the traditional jazz
cadre were Eddie Edwards, once of the
Original Dixicland Jazz Band, and song-
writer J. Russell Robinson, who had
been one of the pianists for the

unit. Among the others were:
Scobey, Gene Sedric, June Clark, Dan
Grissom (former Jimmie Lunceford

singer), Ike Quebec, Pete Brown, Sonny
Clark, Addison Farmer, Curtis Counce,
Herbie Nichols, Joe Gordon and Bobby
ar. Also dead were two men once
important па jazz — Glen Gray
and Nat Towles.

There were two nonmusicians on the
list. Both had been long-time supporters
of the music. One was Jimmy Ryan,
whose jar club had finally left 52nd
Street in 1962 after 21 years on that once
swinging thoroughfare. The other was
k Crystal, a fixture for m:

since 1949, the producer of wee
concerts at the Central Plaza in Man-
hattan. Crystal may have been the most
assiduous organizer of benefits for mu-
sicians a ili i
and his weekend sessions, moreover, sus-
tained the morale of many older players
who otherwise would have had hardly

any contact at all with a jazz audience.

On the jazz record scene, the bossa
nova became, as Paul Desmond noted,
the “bossa antigua" — prematurely super-
annuated by overexposure. Nothing
took its place in terms of markedly ex-
panding the record-buying public for
jazz and allied music. (There was a fever
ish attempt to manufacture pop gospel,
spurred mainly by Columbia Records
and the Sweet Chariot night club in
New York) Ray Charles was still by far
the most popular recording artist with
jazz roots; and for the rest, the men.
high in the jazz album charts continued
to include Dave Brubeck, Miles Davis,
Jimmy Smith and Count Basie,

As for jazzmcn on the ascendant, the
year’s most sudden new arrival was "Tony
William ar-old drummer, who
m an apprenticeship
in Boston to a position with Miles
Davis unit. In bigband drumming,
Jake Hanna of Woody Herman's orches-
tra increased his stature in that challeng-
ing specialty during the ycar. Other jazz
musicians on thc way up who particu
ly distinguished themselves were bass-
ists Steve Swallow, Gary Pe:
Ron Carter; pianists Paul Bley, Herbie
Hancock and Don Friedman; guitarists
Joe Pass and Gabor Szabo; vibists Walt
Dickerson and Gary Burton; trumpeter
Dupree Bolton; trombonists Phil Wilson
and Roswell Rudd; alto saxophonists
Jimmy Woods and Sonny Simmons:
tenor saxophonists Booker з and
Archie Shepp; and flutist Prince Las!
Two vocalists of unusual. expressive
pacities began to emerge — Sheila Jor
dan and Shirley Horn.

Experimentation in jazz continued to
increase in intensity and diversity
throughout the year. The avant-gardists

“I can't do anything. She needs the kiss of a prince.”

177

PLAYBOY

178

had yet to reach enough of an audience
1o guarantec them anything more than

very occasional work, but among them-
selves they moved farther and farther
jae

away from conventional bases for
improvisation. Many abandoned
usual chord structures and also
that a regular, explicit beat was no
longer necessary. On an educational tel-
evision program and in concerts, Don
Ellis introduced the "music of chance”

jazz. (On onc occasion, the length
s solo was determined
he drew from a deck before
ance began.)

Jimmy Ciufire persevered in getting
quarter tones out of the clarinet, and
multiple instrumentalist Roland Kirk
even made the microphone into a musi-
cal instrument. As the volume was
turned up one evening, there was result-
ant microphone feedback (a high, pierc-
ing sound), and Kirk incorporated the
feedback into his solo. He later repeated.
his feat. "Most people,” Kirk pointed
out, "don't realize that the microphone
does have notes that can be used."
“Man,” said a devotee in the audience,
‘I never saw anyone play the micro
pect. Al Jol
allying cry might prove apt for
we years ahead: “You ain't heard
ig yeu

FINAL conus of 1963 rolled
jazz performers and jazz buffs
were again polled by PrAvaov to find
out their choices of the musicians who
they deemed had contributed most to the
jazz scene during the prior twelvemonth.
As in polls past. the winners of this

cighth annual велувоу ja
of our readers become members
1064 Playboy All-Star Jazz Band. The

Hots for their own ch
egory, supplying us with

galaxy of

All-Stars’ All-St;
and

as of
en-
tion musicians who won the
famed Playboy Jazz Medals in the 1963
plebiscite, enabling them to vote in their
own poll, were: Cantionball Adderley,
Louis Armstrong, Chet Atkins, Bob
Brookmeyer, Ray Brown, Dave Brubeck,
Jobn Coltrane, Miles Davis, Buddy De-
Paul Desmond, Duke Ellingtoi

ers

Dizw Gillespie, Lionel Hampton, Al
Hirt, Milt Jackson, J. J. Johnson. Philly
Joe Jones. Stan Kenton, Dave Lambert,
Wes Montgomery, Joc Morello, Ge
п, Oscar Pet

ALLSTARS’ ALLSTAR LEADER: The bi
e in the vote for bigband baton
was Herdsman Woody Her
surging into third place. As usual,
Duke remained king. and the Cow

man

n
the
t his

өтөп; 2. Count
4. Stan Ken-

apparent. 1. Duke Eli
3. Woody Herm;
ton: 5. Maynard Ferguson.

ALL-STARS” ALL-STAR TRUMPE
three slots remained unchanged from
last усаг, but the Herculean Al Hirt
moved up to take over fourth posit
1. Dizzy Gillespie; 2. Miles Davis: 3. Clark
Terry: 4. Al Hirt; 5. Freddie Hubbard.

ALL-STARS’ ALLSTAR TROMBONE: The
bone throne was once Dres
with newcomer to the list Urbie Green
tying Curtis Fuller for the fourth slot. 1
3. J. Johnson; 2. Bob Brookmeyer; 3. Kai
ing; 4. Curtis Fuller, Urbie Green.

The first

скед the Adderley Cannon-
with the very busy Phil
surprising fourth. 1.

Cannonball Adderley; 3.
Stitt; 4. Phil Woods; 5. Johnny

Poul Desmond; 2.
Soi
Hodges.

ALL-STARS’ ALL-STAR TENOR SAX: The
boss of the bossa nova, Stan Getz, was the
boss of the AllStar's All Stars by а com-
fortable margin with Sonny Rollins, last
year's winner, dropping into a tie for
third. 1. Stan Getz; 2. John Coltrane;
3. Sonny Rollins, Zoot Sims; 5. Coleman
ins.

ALLSTARS’ ALLSTAR BARITONE SAX:
Gerry Mulligan was again all by himself,
with the first four places repeating last
year’s finish. 1. Gerry Mulligan; 2. Harry
Carney; 3. Pepper Adams; 4 Ceci
Payne: 5. Charlie Davis.

ALL-STARS’ ALL-STAR CLARINET: Ап
avant-garde instrumentalist, Jimmy Giuf-
fre, took over third place in a race that
saw veteran Goodman come on strong
for a close second-place finish behind.
Buddy DeFranco. 1. Buddy DeFranco; 2.
Benny Goodman; 3. Jimmy Сімс: 4.
Jimmy Hamilton: 5. Alvin Batiste.

ALL-STARS’ ALLSTAR PIANO: The only
changes from last year's results were in
the lower echelons, with Dave Brubeck
taking over third from Thelonious Monk
and Erroll Garner moving into fifth.
1. Oscar Peterson; 2. Bill Evans; 3. Dave
Brubeck; 4. Thelonious Monk; 5. Erroll
С

ner.

ALL-STARS! ALLSTAR GUITAR: Again, the
fist. two finishers remained unchanged
from last year; Kenny Burrell moved
from fourth to third and Barney Kessel
put in a reappearance in fourth, 1. Wes
Montgomery; 2. Jim Hall; 9. Kenny Bur-
rell; 4. Barney Kessel; 5. C Byrd.

ALL-STARS’ ALLSTAR BASS: The redoubt-
able Ray Brown piled up more votes
from his jazz confreres than any other

musician. The rest of the finishers had
to be satisfied with crumbs. 1. Rey Brown;
2. Paul Chambers; 3. Red Mitchell;
1. Gene Wright; 5. Sam Jon

ALL-STARS' ALL-STAR DRUMS: For the
fourth усаг in а row, Philly Joc proved
a skins winner, with another Jones boy

and Joe Morello shari l place. 1.

Philly Joe Jones; 2. Elvin Jone
ello; 4. Art Blakey: 5. Budd:
ALL-STARS’ ALL-STAR MISCELLANEOUS I
STRUMENT: Last y
almost duplicated this
virtuoso Toots T
ng into the charts to
Moody for fourth slot

harmonica
brea
mes

us vibes; 2. Jimmy Smith, organ:
3. John Coltrane, soprano sux; 4. James
Moody, flute, Toots Thiclemans, har-

monica.

ALL-STARS” ALL-STAR MALE
Sinatra was an casy winner this ye
perennial contender Ray Charles.

VOCALIST:
over
The

only "new" name in '64's first five is
Tony Bennett's; the omnipresent Tony
tied Mr. B. for fourth. 1

2, Ray Charles; 3. Joe William:

Bennett, Billy Eckstine.

ALL-STARS’ ALL-STAR FF
Although Miss Fitz was a by-now-famil
breeze for the number-one position, the
second spot was wrested away from the
Divine Sarah by fastrising Nancy Wil-
son. 1. Elle Fitzgerald; 2. Nancy Wilson;
h Vaughan;
Washington

ALL-STARS’ ALL-STAR INSTRU ME,
20: The Dave Brubeck Qu:
а clean sweep this year, oust
Peterson group as the music
aggregation, 1. Dave Brubeck Quartet;
2, Oscar Peterson Trio: 3. Cannonball
Adderley Sextet; 4. Miles Davis Sextet;
5. Erroll Garner Trio.

ALL-STARS” ALL-STAR VOCAL GROUP: Last
years third-place finishers, the Fou
Freshmen, happily changed places with
"63 winners Lambert, Hendricks & Bavan
Second and fourth positions remained
unchanged. 1. Four Freshmen; 2. Hi-Lo's;
3. Lambert, Hendricks & Bavan; 4. Dou
ble Six of Paris; 5. J's & Jamie, Kin,

sters.

Our readers’ choices in the eighth an-
nual Playboy Jazz Poll, a record crop
of ballots, indicated once their
nners. There are,
however, some stunning surpri

Foremost among them is the dethron-
ing of Stan Kenton as leader of the Play-
boy AllStar Jaz: Band, after seven
straight years at the top. Taking h
place, and doing it by a handsome ma:
last year's second-place finisher
Henry Mancini. If Henry proved one
thing, it was the power of the m:
tainment media — TV,

more

's.

movies and rei

ords— to put a musician in the public
Count

spotlight. The Duke and The
remained
while Maynard Ferguson's driving agere
gation netted him the fifth slot. Th
Thundering Herd gave a rejuvenated
Woody Herman the impetus to move
from fifteenth to seventh in the balloting.

Although the trumpet section has the
e personnel year, positions
The hirsute Al

as 1

huy.

Hirt moved from fourth chair to second
behind Miles Davis, with Gillespic and
Armstrong cach dropping down a notch.
“The 1961 trombone section accounted
for a new face in the Playboy AllStar
Jazz Band. Si Zentner, who placed
twelfth in the leader category, took over
on third tram, behind perennial fust-
place finisher J. J. Johnson and runn
up. New York Playboy Club Musical
Director Kai Winding. Valve trombon:
Bob Brookmcyer dropped into fourth
position, while yeteran Jack Teagarden
was narrowly edged off the bandstand
entirely.
Alto king

nonball Adderley and
second-chair occupant Paul Desmond
repeated last years placings, with the
also-rans strung out behind them in
much the same order as in 1963.

Places one through six were dittoed.
from 1963 in the tenorsax derby, with
Stan Getz again holding down first chair
and John Coltrane the secondary scat.

Gerry Mulligan each year turns the
baritone-sax balloting into a one-man
show, and this year he finished stronger
than evel ith over 18,000 votes be-
tween Gerry and second-place finisher
amy Сіште. The ubiquitous Bud
ik moved into third, just nudgi
out Detroit jazzman Pepper А

New Orleans clarinetist Pete F
widened last year's margin of victory
over Swing King Benny Goodman. Acker
Bilk, who came from nowhere to finish
fifth last year, jumped to third, finishing
ahead of Buddy DeFranco and Jimmy
Giultre,
ave Brubeck, whose group was busy
garnering medals by the bushel, im-
proved on last year’s win, as Oscar Peter-
son displaced André Previn in second
place. Popular recording artist Peter
Nero leapfrogged from seventh to fourth,
moving Erroll Garner one rung lower
than last year.

In the closest contest of the y
master of the unamplified
Byrd, eked out а I2-vote margin over
last year’s winner Chet Atkins. Barney
Kessel, 1963's second-place finisher
wound up fourth, while Wes Montgom-
ery nudged up a slot to third place.

y Brown, for the eighth straight.
led the bass ballo: a list that
mained unchanged from last year
through the first four places. Red
Mitchell dropped from fifth to twelfth,
his spot being taken over by Art Davis.

Brubeck man Joe Morello once more
wrapped up the drums medal in a finish
that echoed last. ycar's Morcllo-Mannc-
Krupa Blakey lineup, with elde
man Cozy Cole usurping Philly Joe
Jones’ filth position.

The Hamp again had things very
much his own way as the master vib
smith widened the gap over the number-
two finisher, who this year was flutist

ams.

'ountain

states-

Herbie Mann; Herbic moved up smartly
from last year’s 22nd-place finish. This
go-round, mallet man Milt Jackson had
to be satisficd with third position.

Although Frank Sinatra had no near
peers among the readers for 1964s male
vocalist, there was some shuffling about
in the lower echelons, While Ray Charles
kept a strong hold on second slot, Harry
Belafonte plummeted from third to a
sixth-place tie with Oscar Brown, J
Johnny Mathis moved up a rung to
third, Tony Bennett leaped from twelfth
to fourth, and Andy Williams jumped
from eleventh to fifth.

Just as rock firm on the distaff side of
vocal department was Ella Fitz
h bright young singer Nancy
Wilson gaining new voting suength in
repeating her second-place finish. Rock-
eting onto the vocal scene in an amazing
display of popular appeal, dynamic song-
stress Barbra Streisand. unlisted last year,
finished a strong third, while Joan Bacz
in fourth swapped places with Julie
London.

‘The voting for instrumental combo
made this a vintage year for the Dave
Brubeck Quartet, adding a readers
medal to their All-Stars’ All-Stars acco-
lade; what with Desmond doing the
same and Brubeck and Morello winning
one medal each, as instrumentalists, they
seemed to be developing а hardwa
monopoly. Although making a strong
move upward from seventh to second,
the Oscar Peterson Trio was still [ar be-
hind the Brubeck men in the voting.
just besting the Cannonball Adde:
Sextet, which moved up from last year’s
fifth-place finish. The MJQ fell off from
second to fourth, while Al Hirt and his
troops edged up from sixth to fifth

Last. but by no means least, there are
three new faces as 1964's nonpareil vocal
group. Peter, Paul & Mary, who came in
a highly respectable third last year, gar-
nered new fans via recordings and com
cert appearances, to dethrone Lambert,
Hendricks & Bavan. L, H & B took over
the runner-up spot from the Four Fresh-
men, with 1963's fifth-place finishers, the
Kingston , trading positions with
63's fourth-slot occupants, the Lime-
liters

The following is a tabulation of the
many thousands of votes cast in this big-
gest of all jazz polls. The names of the
jazmen who won places on the 1961
Playboy All-Star Jazz Band are in bold-
face type. In some categories, there are
two or more winners in order to make
up a fullscale jazz orchestra, Artists poll-
g less than 100 votes are not listed: i
categories where two choices were al-
lowed, those receiving less than 200 votes
are not listed; in categories where [our
votes were allowed, no one with under
400 votes is listed.

(continued on next page)

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PLAYBOY

180

LEADER

1. Henry Mancini
Stan Kenton ....
3. Duke Ellington ..
. Count Basie . c
rd Ferguson ...
су Jones
оду Herman .
Mulligan ...

Dizzy Gillespie ...
- Benny Goodman .
Zentner =
. Nelson Riddle -

4. Lionel Hampton .
. Gerald Wilson .
. Ray Com
. Les Elgart.
. Les Brown
Billy May ..
|. Ted Heath .
Pete Rugs
Oliver Nelson
. Harry James

АІ Hirt
- Dizzy Gillespie -
Louis Armstrong -
з. Maynard Ferguson ...
6. Jonah Jones
Adderley
Bobby

rty Paich .
Ray McKinley . no| 2.
Shorty Rogers 104 3

TRUMPET M
Miles Davis - 6.

y Rogers
. Clark Terry ..
- Doc Severinsen
. Pete Candoli
Conte Candoli .
Red Nichols
. Roy Eldridge
Donald Byrd
. Freddie Hubbard
Lec Morgan ~
Blue Mitchell
Don Cherry ...-
. Charlie Shavers >
Wild Bill Davison ...
Jack Sheldon ..
Тос Newman
Buck Clayton
Kenny Dorham
|. Curmell Jones .

TROMBONE

J. J. Johnson -
2. Kai Winding
Si Zentner -
Bob Brookmeyer

is 16.
8. Urbie Green 7.
artis Fuller .

. Turk Murph:
11. Jimmy Cleveland .... 20.
- 1912
- 1825
Bennie Green - 1237

15.
16.

Dave Baker .......... dy
Bill Harris aly

- Milt Bernhart ~-
|. Tyree Glenn
. Bob Fitzpatrick .
Fred As

- Dick Nash .
- Quentin Jackson
. Wilbur De Paris
. Wayne Henderson
Benny Powell

- Jimmy

. Dickie Wells .
- Cutty Cur
36. Lou McGarity
. Georg Br

. Paul Desmond

. Le

. Hank Crawford ..
. Eric Dolphy

. Lou Donaldson .

. Willie Smith
. Herb Geller ..

. Walt Levinsky
. John Handy

. Coleman Hawkins

. Bud Freen
. Eddi

. Sam Donahue .
mu

. Hank Mobley
. James Moody .
. Bob Cooper

Trummy Young
Carl Fontana

Grey ..-
to.

ce Brown

ту Betts

<nepper ..
ic Dickenson
Melba Liston .

nis
Tommy Pederson,

AUTO SAX.

Cannonball Adderley 15,690
--14,300

Farl Bostic ... -
Johnny Hodges .
Zoot Sims

Bud Shank
Ornette Col
Sonny Stitt
Paul Horn .
Ted Nash .
Konitz
Carter
Woods
Jackie McLean

es Moody
riano .
ichaus .

Lennie

AL Belletto ...

e Baltazar.
Wright
mmy Woods
усе

‘TENOR SAX

Stan Getz
John Coltrane .

Zoot Sim

“Fathead”
Al Gol
Yusef

cwman

Davis

Dave Pell
Sonny Stitt

pois Jacquet
Buddy Tate

ido Musso
Jimmy Heath .

. Stanley Tur

. Bill
. Budd John
6. Benny Сојко 8
. Teddy Edwards .

. Pepper Adams .

. Lonnie Shaw B
hardson ..

. Benny Goodman
- Acker Bilk

. Buddy DeFranco
. Jimm
б. Woody Herman ...

. Pec Wee Russell...

9. Buddy Collette
. J

. Andi
. Peter Nero

. Ahmad

|. Bill

- Duke
. Ramsey Lewis
. Les McCann

Richie Kamuca

Plas Johnson ...

BARITONE SAX

Gerry Mulligan ....
Jimmy Giullre ...
Bud Shank

Charles Davis.
ry Carney
ппу

b

Frank Hittner ,

Jeror
Bill Hood
nie Caceres
ley Webb

CLARINET.

Pete Fountain

y Giuffre .

Paul Ho

amy Hamilton .
Tony Scott ..
Phil Woods

Bill Smi

Bodner
ANO
Dove Brubeck .
Oscar Pererson
Previn

Erroll

George 5
Thelonious Monk .

Count Basi

Wilson
Allison

Newborn, Jr.
Steve Allen
Bud Powell

6,747

Howard Roberts .
|. ВИ Harris о.

. Red
- George Tucker

Shelly Manne .
3. Gene Krupa
. Art Blakey

. Wes Montgomery.
. Barney Kessel .

' Herb Ellis

. George Van Eps .....
. Grant Green
|. Tal Farlow .

. Ray Brown

) Buddy Clark
. Perey Heath
. Chubby Jackson
|. Leroy Vi
. Norman Bates .
. Bob Haggart

4. Don Bagley

. Keter

. Monk Montgomery ..

. Johnny Р

. Philly Joe Jones
9. Chico Han

. Ed Таре
- Louis Bellson

- Rufus Jones ...
. Elvin jones ...

GUITAR.

Byrd
Chet. Atkins

Eddie Condon ...
Les Раш .
Johnny Smith .
Tony Mottola .
A jola

indell Lowe

Oscar Moore

Вапу Galbraith .

Bass

Charlie Mingus
jene Wright

Paul Chambers
Art Davis

Red M
Sam Jo

Eddie Salr;
Mile Hin d
1 Dee Young
Beus
Arvell Shaw .

m Stewart ....
Pops Foster
George Di

аде Jones .
Mike Rubi

Monty Budwig .
Joc Mondragon
jender -

DRUMS

Joo Morello

. Cozy Cole . 849
. Buddy Rich . . 1200
. Max Roach . . 1069

Ite

Jo Jones

18.
19.
20,

59.
30,
ЕД
32,

1
2.

3.
zh

6

7. Red Norvo, vi

8.

a
10.

16.

18.

En

25.

30.
En
3e

э.

Т. Frank Sinatra +

3.
4.

6.
6.
8.

9.

10.

. Buddy Collette, flu

Sonny Payne .
Connie Kay .
Mel Lewis

Jack Sperling
Red Holt .

Roy Н:
Louis Hayes
Vernel Four
Stan Levey

sam Woodya
Sonny Greer
Danny Barcel

Ron Jellerson . 133
Y 130
Dave Bailey . 195

Nick Fatool .
Ray Bauduc .

Don Lamond 108 | 28
MISCELLANEOUS INSTRUMENT E
Lionel Hampton, vibes 5,986 | 31
Herbie Mann, flute .. 2,843 | 32.
Milt Jackson, vibes .. 2434 | 35.
Jimmy Smith, organ . ЗІ

Cal Tjader, vibes
Miles Davis, Flügelhorn 1,613

John Coltram

soprano sax .
Yusef Lateef, flute ~
Art Van Dai
accordion

Gibbs, vibes .
lo, bongo
ul Horn. flute
Shorty Rogers,
Fligelhorn .
Bud Shank, flute.
y Starling,
mellophonium .....
Clark Terry,
Flügelhorn

vibes, mellophone .
Ga Burton, vibes ..
|. Е
Bob Rosengarden,

bongo
Leo Diamond,

harmonica
Buckner, organ .
Shirley Scott, organ

James Moody, flute...
Victor Feldman, vibes
Steve Lacy, soprano sax
Bob Cooper, oboe ...
y Nance, violin ...
Julius Watkins,

French horn ....... 11%
. Willie Ruff, 2;
French hom ...... usj 5

36. Larry Bunker, vibes .. 112
- Eric Dolphy, flute ... 107| 4
MALE VOCALIST 5.

Ray Charles .

Johnny Mathis
Tony Bennett i
Andy Williams 8.

Harry Belafonte .

Oscar Brown, Jr. 1216
Mel Tormé 1,192] 10.
Sammy Davis Jr. 1,008 | 11.

Nat "King" Cole 868

. Perry Como .

. Roy Hamilton .

G. Peggy Lee

. Dinah Wash
. Doris Day -
. Della
. Jenn
. Anita O'Day
. Dakota Staton
. Lena Horne .

. Chris Connor .......-

. Pea
. Jo
. Teri Thornton .
. Aretha

4. Ки:

‚ Modern Jazz Quartet

. George Sheari

- Miles Davis Sextet ...

810

xe / 555

} Buddy Greco .,...... 519
Steve Lawrence 361
Vic Damon 349
Jon Hendr 337
. Mark Murphy 331
. Bobby Darin . 316
Billy Eckstine . 204
. Brook Benton. 199
Armstrong 187

Jimmy Rushing
rank D'Ronc
hill Henderson .

Bing Crosby
Pat Boone

AI Hibbler

Lightnin’ Hopkins 115
Arthur Prysock 114
Johnny Hartman .... 102

FEMALE VOCALIST
Fitzgerald ...-
ncy Wilson .

Barbra Strcisand
Joan Baez
Julie London

nic Somme:

arah Vaughan ...
гуше Gormé
dy Garland .
Keely Smith.

проп

Smi

h

McRae

halia Jackson

ia Lynne. d
Diahann Carroll .....

atti Page .
1 Байсу.
tafford .

Fran
aye P. Morgan

p:
James .......

n

TEUMENTAL COMBO
Боск Quartet 9,581
Peterson Trio . 1,641
ronball Adderley
Sextet ..-

Al Hirt's New Orleans
Sextet

Quintet

Ahmad Jamal Trio ..
Louis Armstrong

All-Stars oso. TEE]
Charlie Byrd Trio 694.
Art Blakey and the

Jaze Messengers ... 657

. Turk Murph
Band
. Paul Winter Sextet .
VOCAL GROUP

Peter, Paul & Mary --6,839
. Lambert, Hendricks

X Bavan
. Four Freshmen,
Kingston Trio .
. Limeliters .....

Jazz

‚ Dukes of Dixi
6. Kai Windi

Jonah Jones Quartet
John Coltrane Quartet
20. Thelonious Monk
Quartet
+ Jazz Crusaders
Erroll Garner T В
1 araldi Trio..
. Horace Silver Quintet.
. Les McCann Ltd.
. Cal Tjader Quintet ..
97. Nina Simone and
MO К eee es
28. Shelly Manne and

Brothers Four
. Raelets .
- Kirby Stone Four .
. Platters

| Double Six of Paris
Mills Brothers |

Gene Krupa Quartet .

Al Belletto Quartet ..

Chico Hamilton
Quintet.

Weavers
. Modern

. Ink Spots

w Christy M 77
Pennies -- 160 . New Christy finstrels ve
Al Cohn-Zoot Sims ~ Я
148 21. King Sisters 9 Лав
^| 25. Smothers Brothers ... 115

114 a

“Had 1 thought my health stood in jeopardy,
Officer, I never would have lit one!”

181

PLAYBOY

182

LYRICIST conne from page 121)

ned and

consciousness; suddenly, he gr
snapped his fingers.

What is it, Mr. Porter
mer. “Are you all right?
fore than all right,” said Cole. “I've
just thought of the best lyric of my |
timc"

And he dashed home and began to
write: “Strange deer, but true deer . . .
When I'm close to cwe-deer, the stars
fill the sky...”

asked the

Victor Herbert was a man who had a
mania for personal cleanliness, as evi
dened by his love of sweetsmelling
soaps. Unable to buy enough at thc
stores to suit his needs, he tried making
his own at home in the tub, but could.
never get the fragrance to blend into
the mixture of fat and lye with which
he'd start. Undaunted, he hired Lizabeth
Terry, leading female spinster scientist
of the day, to help him in his tas
The secret,” she laughed, standing
beside the tub, "is to put the scent. in
the tub first, and then add the fat and
lye.” Smugly, she opened a bag of choco-
Tates she'd brought over.

“Splendid!” he cried, giving her a con-

tulatory swat on the shoulder blades
that sent her reeling into the linen
closet, where she vanished amid a swirl
of silken pillows.
icf, what have I done?" said
the maestro, flinging aside pillows with
until he located his victi
huddled in a frightened heap ag;
ihe closet l, covered with candy.

"Ah, sweet Miss Terry of lye-fat last,
Гуе found you!” he exclaimed, then
gasped and ran for his piano.

indon

lra Gershwin, pondering a lyric that
just wouldn't germinate, decided to take
a break by visiting a friend. The friend,
however, was having domestic difficul
ties.

“My wife is a wonderful woman, Ia.”
said the man, “but she hates needlework,
Right now, she’s sitting in the kitchen,
a pair of my torn trousers on her lap,
and she’s dreaming up excuses 50 to the
minute, just to avoid stitching.

When Ira expressed disbelief, the
friend led him into the kitchen. There
t the wife, her gaze fixed out the win-
dow, her chin on her fist. the pants un
touched. “Well?” asked her husband.

“I can't cor c." she said. “The

en

leader of those Untouchables called to
say he wanted to come over and ques-
tion me."

"Honey — 1" her husband said warn-
ingly.

And,” she persisted, “I ordered a cof-
feecake from the store, and it'll be de-
livered any minute;

Just as her husba

nd bey

1 to protest,

the
cha

back doorbell rang. Ira and he ex-
nged a look, then the man opened
the door, while the wife, behind them,
said, "Sec? See? I was telling the truth!"
She craned to see who had rung the bell.

The caller turned out to be the milk-
man, with a half pound of cream cheese
and six eggs. The husband took the
things, closed the door, and said to his
wife, "It ain't Ness or Sara Lee. Sew!”

When they looked for Ira, he'd al-
ready left, whistling

One day, when Alan Jay Lerner was
suolling about the deck of a foundering
i cr, he came upon a group of

a sick look on their faces,
standing upon a tectering board set on
the rail the crew about to them
overboard.

"What's going on?" he asked the cap-
tain.

"Well, sir.” said the man, "you see
that Wren there? The uim litle miss in
uniform? Seems she stowed away all the

fe jackets when her group came on
board, and when we began to sink, her
cabin was flooded with such icy North
Atlantic waters that the shock took her
voice away, It means we've got to dump
the lot of them overboard here, so they
won't be clinging to those passengers
who do have jackets, when we all aban-
don ship about a mile farther along.

"Too bad," said Lerner. "But I have
g problem. I'm stuck for

song theme for this new musical I'm
working on, and ——"

“Begging your pardon, sir," said the
captain, “My first mate wishes to speak
to me. Yes, Thomas?

“It’s about these blokes on this plank,
sir" said the mate. “Lets not abandon
them here in the sea. There's a way 10
find their life jackets

"Which is what?”
hopefully
“Well,” said the mate, "why cant the
nglish? ‘Teach their chilled Wren how
to speak!" The captain thanked the
mate; Lerner whipped out his notebook
al history was made.
ing in a pleasant country inn, de-
liberating over a ballad for Annie Get
Your Gun, hving Berlin noticed a man,
obviously а hobo, stagger into the cock-

ail lounge. Amid a stream of vul
isms, the man demanded free whiskey.
Phe bartender paid no attention and
was, in fact, about to have the man for-
cibly ejected, when suddenly the man
suaightened, took off his ragged cap and
said, “Hurray for the Great Emanci-
pator!” Everyone in the lounge cheered,

nd soon all the guests were stand
the man to drinks.

a more pr

said the

his waitress, when she came to clear the
table. "A rotten. drunk like that 5
kind word about Honest Abe, and now
he gets all the booze he wants."
The waitress shrugged. "You know the
old saying
“No” s

id Irving, "I don't. What is

itress smiled wearily. “They
say that foul Lincoln-lovers wander full.”

“That gives me an У exulted Ir-
ving.

While waiting in a small town to
change buses, Stephen Sondheim ac-
cepted the kind invitation of a young
lady whom he'd met on the bus to while
t at her home, near the

away h
depot. There, settled in her kitchen, he
sipped coffee and told her the troubles
of modern-day lyricists. "You know," he
mused, “thyme schemes aren't so impor-
tant anymore. The main thing is for
your lyric to tell a story, sometimes with-
out any rhyme at all. Of course, to fit
the meter, onc sometimes has to те
range the word order in sentences, so
that they are not quite patterned after
normal speech."

The words were no sooner out of his
mouth than footsteps sounded loudly
from the room above, and there was
thunder of feet coming down the stairs
to the kitchen. The girl turned pale and
shoved a chair-back under the doorknob.
"Run!" she cried. "You have to get out
of here! That's my brother Avery, and
he’s a professor of literature, and he
an ungovernable temper, and if he
catches you — 1"

“But we're only tal
surp

Хо,

ng," said Stephen,

1. "That's not sinful...”

said the girl waving him out

the kitchen door, "but Avery thinks

gumming up prose is!”
Stephen did a cart wheel and dashed

for his bus, laughing triumphantly.

Stephen Foster, before selling an
songs at all, was in a diner one d
ng to think of what might become a
hit song lyric. As Foster sat pondering,
a mule driver stopped in and said to the
counterman, “Gimme a cup о" joc. Yes
terday’s will do. No cream or sugar."

"Here you are,” said the counterm:
“Old black joe.”

The man thanked him and then
opened his illustrated copy of The Ara-
bian Nights to read as he drank h

сойее. Stephen looked over his shoulder
d noted the picture of a genie with
bed

light-brown hair, standing over a
on which slept a lovely girl.
dreamer, huh?” remarked the reader.

But Stephen shook his head irritably
and said, "Don't bother me, I'm trying
to think up song lyrics and ideas.” He
later gave up and went home.

183

ALFRED DELLER, cond.,
Master pieces. Dell
guard M-

Madrigal
Conor. Van-

DONIZETTI, Lucia di Lammer-
moor. Joan Sutherland (s). Renato
ioni (0). Robert Merrill (b),
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Angel M-S

GABRIELI, Gabricli and His Con-
lemporaries. Canonis and Sonatas.
oncert Ensemble of the Schola Can-
iorum Basil August Wen-
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GABRIELI, GIDVANNI, Sonatas
«nd Canzoni and GABRIELI, AN-
DREA, Aria della battaglia. Eastman
Wind Ensemble, Frederick Fennel
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GERSHWIN, Porgy and Bess. Law-
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(5). Colum 3 LPs

Rhapsody in Blue. Leonard Bern-
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GESUALDO, 7
Ionishing Life and Music
Robert Craft, cond.;
= Carol Rosenstiel, harpsichord:
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Vocalists,

E. Power Diggs,

п Sutherland
Ber-
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психа, Richard Is

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Concertos for Organ and Orches-

HANDEL, dicing. Jo
(5). Grariella Sc
(ms). Lu

Ode for St. Gecilia’s Day. Adele
Addison (8), John McGollum (1);

Rutgers University Choir; New York
Phili

Leonard Bernstein,
1. Columbia M-S

HAYDN, Concerto for Violin and
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не:
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99-104. Royal
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Symphony No. 92, in G ("Ox-
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THE HEIFETZ-PIATIGORSKY CON-
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Mendelssohn: Octet for Strings, in E.

184 flat, Op. 20; Brahms: Sexier for

PLAYBOY LP LIBRARY (continued from page 65)

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in C, Op. ром.

Gregor
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HINDEMITH, Mathis der Maler
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ald Grobe (0), Dietrich Fischer-Die-
Skau (b); Radio Sy Orchestra
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VLADIMIR HOROWITZ, piano, The

Horowitz Collection. Barber, Cho-
pin. Clementi. Czerny. Mendelssohn,
Moszkowski, ^ Mevari, Prokofiev,
Saint-Saens, Schumann, Scriabi
Victor M, 2 LPs

IVES, Symphony No. 2. New York
Philharmonic, Leonard Bernstein,
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LISZT, Sonata [or Piano, in B

minor; Funcrailles and SCHUMANN:
Arabesque, Op. 18; Fantasiestücke,
Op. 12; Fraumeswirren: Presto pas-

Ор. Toceata, Op. 7.
imir Horowitz, piano, Angel M

MAHLER, Symphony No. 9, in D.
Columbia "Symphony Orchestra,
Bruno Walter, cond. Columbia M-S,
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MOZART, Concertos for Piano and
Orchestra: No. 22. in E. flat, К. 482;
No. 6. in D flat, К. 238. Géza Anda,
à Academica of the
Géza And:
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Concertos for Wind Instruments:
for Bassoon and Orchestra in B flat,
K. 191; for Clarinet and Orchestra,
in А. К. 622: for Flute,
С. К. 313; for Oboe,
Soloists of the Phi
тта, Euge
bia М-5, 2 LPs.

Соз fan tutte. El
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Stelfek (6). А
seppe Taddei (b). Walter Berry (b
Philharmonia Chorus and Orchestra,
Karl Bölm, cond. Angel M-S, 4 LPs
Serenade for Wind Instruments,
No. 10, in B flat, К. 361. Members of
Symphony Orchestra,
cond. Deutsche

in E flat,
. 983; Rondo, in А minor, К.
511; Contrelanze, К 606 (атт. Lan-
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Victor M, 2 LPs

Symphonies: Nos. 35. 36, 3
10, 41, Columbia Symphony Orches

Bruno Walter, cond. Columbia
3 LPs

MUSSORGSKY, Boris Go
(ara. Rimsky-Korsakoll). Evelyn Lear
(5), John Lani
(b). et al; Chorus of the National
Opera of Sofia; Orchestre de la
Societe des Concerts du Conserv:
гё Cluytens, cond.

NEW YORK PRD MUSICA, Insiru-
mental Music [rom the Courts of
Queen Elizabeth «nd King James.
Noah Greenberg. cond. Decca MS

PERGDLESI, Concestini: No
©; No. flat; No. 6, in B
Concerto for Flute and Strings,
André Janer, flute: Zurich
Orchestra, Edmond de Stoutz, cond.
Vanguard MES

Strings, and Ti
Maurice Di
tional Radio Orchest
tre, cond. Angel MS

. Georges Pré-

PROKOFIEV, Concerto for Piano

and Orchesia, No. 3, in С. Op. 26
1 RACHMANINOFF, Concerto for
mo and Orchestra, No. 1, in F

sharp minor, Op. 1. Byron J

piano; Moscow Philharmonic, Kiril
Kondrashin, cond. Mercury M-S

Sonatas for Piano: No. 6, in A.
Op. 82; No. 8, in B flat, Op. В:
Sonatine Pastorale, in C. Op. 59, Na
3; Paysage, Op. 59, No. 2; Pensée No.
3, Op. 02, Cinderella Ballet: Gavotte
ahd RACHMANINOFF, Preludes. Op.
23: No. 4, in D; No. 5, in G
Sviatoslav Richter, piano. Colum
MSS, 2 LPs

Sonatas for Violin and Pian
1, in F minor, Op. 80; No. 2,
Joseph Sziget
piano. Mercury

PRO MUSICA ANTIQUA, Brussels,
Music at the Burgundian Court. Saf-

ford Cape. cond. Vanguard M
PUCCIN

Madama. Butle:

l| Opera. Orchestra
and Chorus, Erich Leinsdorf, cond.
Victor M-S. 3 LPs.

PURCELL, Gome ye Sons of Art:
Rejoice in the Lord Ашау; My Re-
loved Spake. Soloists of the Deller
Consort; Oriana Concert Choir and
Orchestra, Alfred Deller, cond. Van-
guard М5

Dido and Aeneas. Janet Baker (с),
Patricia. (s), Raimund Herinex
(bs), et aL; St. Anthony Singers; Eng-
lish Chamber Orchestra. Anthony
u Lyre MES

RAVEL, Works for Orchestra (com-
plete). Paris Conservatory Orchestra,
о Санои
LPs

RIMSKY-KORSAKOV, Scheherazade
and BORDDIN, Prince Igor. Orches-
de, Ernest
1, cond. London M-S

та Scoto (9.

indo Panerai (b). Re-
паю € (b). et al; Virtuosi di
Roma, Renato Fasino, Mer-
cury MLS, 2 LPs

ARTUR RUBINSTEIN, pi
отмет at Camegie Hall:
lights from the Historic Ten Recitals
of 1961. Debussy, Prokofiev, 5
‘owski, Villa-Lobos. Victor M-5

Monti (0). R

cond.

SCARLATTI, DOMENICO, Sonatas
for Harpsichord. Fernando Valen
harpsichord. Mu

SCHOENBERG,

The
Arnold Schoenberg, Vols

Music of
1 and 2.
Soloists; choruses, ensembles. sym-
phonies Robert Craft, cond. Colum-
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SCHUBERT, Octel for Strings and
Wind:

s: Fine Arts String Quar”
tet: members of the New Vork Wood-
wind Quartet. Concert Disc M-S

Elisabeth Schu

e

M. 2 LPs

Ма. 9
idelphia Orchestr:
cond. Victor M

turo Toscanini

SCHUMANN, arnaval, Op.
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stein, piano. Victor M.S

SHOSTAKDVICH, Concerto јол
Cello and Orchestra, in E. Mat, Op.
107. Mstislav Rostropovich. cello:
Philadelphia Orchestra, Eugene Or-
mandy, cond. Columbia N-S

STRAUSS, JOHANN, Dic Fleder
maus. Elisabeth Schwarzkopf (s)
Nicolai Gedda (1), Philadelphia Oi
chestra, Herbert von Karajan, cond.
Angel M. 2 LPs

STRAUSS, RICHARD, Also Sprach
Zarathustra. Chicago Symphony

Orchestra. Fritz Reiner, cond. Victor
MS

Salome. Birgit Nilsson (s), Сета
Stole (0). chter (b).

Vienna Philharmonic Orches-
tra, Georg Solti, cond. London M-S.

STRAVINSKY, Eight Казу Pieces
Jor Piano, Four Hands: Sonata for.
Two Pianos; Concerto for Two Solo
jauos. Arthur Gold and Robert Fiz-
dale, duo pianists, Columbia M-S.

Oedipus Rex. John Westbrook,
narrator; Shirley Verret (ms), George
Shirley (0). et al: Chorus and Or-
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ashington, Igor Stravinsky, cond,
Colum

Pétrouchka; The Rite of Spring.
Columbia Symphony Orchestra, Igor
Stravinsky. cond. Columbia M.S,

JOAN SUTHERLAND, soprano,
Art of the Prima Donna. Chorus and
Orchestra of the Royal Opera Нон
Covent Garden, Francesco Molinari
Pradelli, cond. London M-S, 2 LPs

TARTINI, Concertos for Violin and
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TCHAIKDVSKY, Symphony No. 6
("Pathétique"). Boson $)
Orchestra. Charles M
Victor M-S

TDRROBA, Nocturno; Sonatina;
Suite Castellana and PONCE, Vals
"heme varie et Finale

„мийа

chestra
cond.

nch,

VAUGHAN WILLIAMS, Fantasia on
a Theme by Thomas Tallis: Fantasia
on “Greensleeves” and ELGAR, Ји

troduction and Allegro, Op. 47: Ser-
nor. Op.

enade jor Strings, їп Е п
20. Allegri String Qu:

the mía of Lond
Barbirolli, cond. Angel M.

Giuseppe Valdengo (b), ct al.
Symphony Orchestra, Arturo
nini, cond. Victor M

VIVALDI, Concertos (В). Soloists; 1
Musici. Epic M-S

The Four Seasons, Op. 8,
14. ] asow, violin;
Zagreb, Antonio Janigro, cond. Bach.
Guild M-S

WAGNER, Das Rheingold. Ki
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geberg, cond. Columbia M-S, 2 1

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