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WX ENZ 0/58 SW KIS SA imi oms 


ENTERTAINMENT FOR MEN OCTOBER 1966 + 75 CENTS 


LAYB 


E YOUR PLAYBOY JAZZ-POLL BALLOT 
ANN-MARGRET AS MODERN ART 

FALL & WINTER FASHION FORECAST 
SEX STARS OF THE FORTIES 
SHAKESPEAREAN PHOTO SATIRE 
NEW FICTION BY RAY BRADBURY, 
KEN W, PURDY, P. G. WODEHOUSE 


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"Division Royene-Fobergé Inc 


AT THE END of Oc- 


PLAYBIL 


tober comes a day 

that kids everywhere await with almost 
as much uncontained. excitement as they 
pend on Christmas: Halloween, when 


ist a little bit of horripilation can scare 
up a paper bag full of goodies. Herein a 
baglul of goodies for you, with plenty 
of treats nay a mick; and you're 
not required 1 look like a goblin (we'd 
prefer vou didn't) or 10 wait till the 31st 
of the month. And no dull paper bag for 
Yon: PRAVROY comes in a colorful wrap- 
per. this month featuring a beautiful 
bird. with beautiful legs and an unusual 


pair of stock. 
А special ucat is Ray Bradbury's The 
Man in the Rorschach Shirt, (bis 


month's lead fiction. Ray 
for the story." he tells us, “one d 
traveling across L. A. by bus. A man got 
on, came down the aisle, wearing а 
strange multicolored sport shirt, First I 
saw it as one thing. then another; many 
devices, many symbols. 1 am quite my- 
opic. The title of the story flashed into 
my head: Why, he's The Man in the 
Rorschach Shirt.” For Bradbury bulis 
(ind folks who just plain like well. 
| pleasant note: Random 
House has released a paperback collec- 
tion of The Vintage Bradbury. 
The best-kept secret in book publishi 
today is the real identity of the author 
of Wiped Ош, a hightening account of 
how an intelligent man lost 1 for- 


a rising stock market, Negotia- 
tions for PLAYBOYS exclusive abridged 
version of the upcoming Simon & 


Schuster book were conducted through 
the writer's agent, who insisted that even 
the check be made out to her for endorse 
ment by "anonymous investor." The 
agent finally permitted an anonymous 
phone cill, in which a disembodied voice 
admitted that "he" was married, had two 
boss, lived in M n. was employed 
in "communications, amd insisted on 
nonymity, saying thar he didu't like 
looking at his checkbook. He did 
admit that he has invested. again, since 
his last disaster, but this time in a con- 
servative 100 shares of a steady stock, 
Recently back from London (where he 
spent most of the list four years), Ken 
W. Purdy plans to return, but adds, 
“This ume instead of England Im 
going to Finland, because 1 will have a 
long novel io finish (pun intended) and 
I think Finland must be the best place 
in the work! to work: Helsinki is the 
most literate commu a the world, 
with long, cold nights—all this plus a 


1 of beauty, natural and man- 
Fortunately, Ken found time in 
London to write the haunting story 


Untitled. 

P. G. Wodehouse’s comedic writing 
has delighted rLaysoy readers often in 
the past (sx of D. G's stories from 
PLAYBOY appear as part of a new collec- 
tion called Plum Pie appcaring this fall 


BRADBURY 


from Simon & Schuster). First. Aid for 
eddie is anoth: 
pade of near disaster written in the witty, 
wacky Wodchousian manner. 

The frost may be on the pumpki 
but it hasn't yet numbed the nimble 
st Arnold Roth, In this 
issue, he makes his third PLaywoy appe 
ance as the illustrator of another old fa 
vorite, Limericks. When Roth, who has 
been everything from a jazz music 
Mad magazine regular, was ask 
wacerire himself, he said succinctly, 
losly 1 go around yawning. 
Madness also figures in the career of 
Lamy Siegel. Coauthor of The Mad 
Show, а smash revue currently in New 
York, Los Angeles and on college tour, 
Lany is in the proces of creating a new 
TV ser nest fall, and has just 
finished the book for a musical comedy 


fingers of a 


s for 


aimed at Broadway. Siegel is always 
right on target, as you can tell from 
Like, Once Upon a Time . . . , hip ver- 
sions of kiddie classics, and his comic 
to-comic Playboy Interview with Mel 
Brooks. both in t issue. 

Hugh — Nisenson (The Mission, 

лувоу, December 1961) returns with A 


thor of À Pile of Stones (Scri 
which won loud critical app 
and the Edward. Lewis Wall 
for fiction, Another noteworthy 
revisiting rLaysoy is James Blish (Music 
of the Absurd, October 1964). His article 


м year 
Award 


WODEHOUSE prm 


Let Joy Be Unconfined suggests some 
nt steps thar may be taken now to 


achieve a technology of pl 
Pietro di Donato's aide Tropic of 
Cuba marks his fifth PLAvmov appe: 


ance, and his first im the nonfiction 
geme. Di answer to our simple question 
Who are you?" Pietro replied: "Born in 
Hoboken. April 13, 1911. Attend ed both 


public and parochial schools. Played 
Jewish urchin in Pasion play. Finished 
eighth grade—went to work as bricklayer 


at age 12 10 support widowed mother 
and seven brothers and sisters. Dreamed 
of being an Wrote 10 Tom Mis— 
never received an answer. Had summer 
theater of my own during the Depres 
sion. Realized actors were puppets and 
became disenchanted. Began to live 
many pats on paper with short story 
Christ in Concrete for Fsquire, 1937. 
Despise negative writers, liars, hypocrites 
ıd the ungrateful. Eye priests. askance, 
bur worship nuns. Mad about girls." 

Is there anything else in our Hallow- 
cen bag? You know there is. Like the pi 
Ann-Margret in swinging scenes 
from her new movie, The Swinger; our 
shining October Playmate, Linda Moon 
id the uncostumed fun of. phorogra 
pher Jerry Yulsman's The Bawdy Bard. 
Like the eleventh annual Playboy Jazz 
Poll Ballot. Like mudh, much more. 

So, when we said a bagful, we meant a 
bagful. Pull up à pumpkin: we think this 
October treat will do the trick. 


ictor 


vol. 18, no. 10—october, 1966 


PLAYBOY. 


Bawdy Bord 


Jazz Poll 


Ann-Margret 


LARRY cotan. P. 106. MARVIN KONEN. P з, 71 
Fosan, P. 3. 62-63, 126, GENE TRINDL P. wd 
MAURICE BESSY (1). CULVER (9), ROY GEORGE (Vj 

UR KNIGHT (1. JOHN KOBAL c11, STANLEY 
PALEY өзу, PENGUIN (11), ROBERT PIKE (1). ШМ i1) 


SUBSCRIPTIONS. IN THE U 5, $8 FOR ONE YEAR 


CONTENTS FOR THE MEN'S ENTERTAINMENT MAGAZINE 


PLAYBILL 2 з 
DEAR PLAYBOY p 2, 
PLAYBOY AFTER HOURS . 121 
THE PLAYBOY ADVISOR 53 
PLAYBOY'S INTERNATIONAL DATEBOOK —travel PATRICK CHASE 59 
THE PLAYBOY FORUM. e 


PLAYBOY INTERVIEW: MEL BROOKS—cendid conversation 71 
THE MAN IN THE RORSCHACH SHIRT—fiction. RAY BRADBURY 82 
ANN-MARGRET AS ART—pictorial 26 
A WOMAN FOR TITUS—ficfion HUGH NISSENSON 93 
WIPED OU ‘article AN ANONYMOUS INVESTOR 95 
LIMERICKS —humor. 

HEAD START/BODY BOOSTERS—grooming 
LET JOY BE UNCONFINED—article. 

A PLAYBOY PAD: TEXAS RETREAT— modern living 

UNTITLED fiction KEN W. PURDY 
THE TREASURE OF SIERRA MADRE—playboy’s playmate of the month 
PLAYBOY'S PARTY JOKES—humor. se 
PLAYBOY'S FALL & WINTER FASHION FORECAST—attire ROBERT L. GREEN 
LIKE, ONCE UPON А TIME—satire. LARRY SIEGEL 
THE 1967 PLAYBOY JAZZ POLL jens 

THE BAWDY BARD—satire. JERRY YULSMAN. 
FIRST AID FOR FREDDIE—fiction P. G. WODEHOUSE 
А CRAFTY CONSTABLE CONFOUNDED—ribald classic HONORE DE BALZAC 
THEATRICAL FARE—food THOMAS MARIO 
TROPIC OF CUBA —агіісіе. PIETRO DI DONATO 
THE HISTORY OF SEX IN CINEMA—orticle ARTHUR KNIGHT ond HOLLIS ALPERT 
ON THE SCENE—personal 
WHO'S AFRAID OF TEEVEE ЈЕЕВІЕ5? —satire. 
LITTLE ANNIE FANNY —satire HARVEY KURTZMAN ond WILL ELDER 224 


JAMES BLISH 


HUGH M 


rner editor and publisher 
A. €. SPECTORSKY associate publisher and editorial director 
ARTHUR PAUL art director 


JACK J. KESSIE managing editor VINCENT T. TAJIRI picture editor 
SHELDON WAX senior editor; MURRAY FISHER, MICHAEL LAURENCE, NAT LEHRMAN, 
WILLIAM MACKLE associate editors: ROBERT L. GREEN fashion director; DAVID TAYLOR 
associate fashion editor: mosas MARIO [ood & drink editor: vATRICK CHASE travel 
editor; | ravi CETIY contributing editor, business & finance: CHARLES REXUMONT. 
HICHARD GHIMAN. KES W. HORDY contributing editors; ARLENE поснае copy chief: 


ROGER WIDENER assistant editor; BEV CHAMBERLAIN asociate picture editor; MARILYN 
GRABOWSKI assistant pichne editor; MAELO CASILU, LARRY CORDON, J. BARRY O'ROURKE, 
POMPEO POSAR. ALFXAS URBA, JERRY VULSMAN staff photographers; SEAN MALINOWSKI 
contributing photographer: DAVID WANG, RONALD BLUME, TOWN CARAFOLL, JOSEPH 
PACZEK assistant avt. directors: WALTER KRADENYCH. ART MCFALLAR art assistants. 
JOHN MASTRO production manager; MAEN VARGO assistant production manager: 
PAD PAPPAS” 

JOstrn FALL advertising manager; JULES KASE associate advertising manage 
SHERMAN KEATS chicago advertising manager; Josern corvi detroil advertising 
manager: NYLSON ruren promotion director; игым torson publicity man 
nger: WXNY BUSS public relations manager: ANSON MOUNT public аай 
manager; тико FREDERICK personnel director: |АхЕТ pueri reader service: 
ALVIN, WIEMOLD subscription fulfillment manager, кїз 
projects; коют 5. вако business manager and circulation director 


his and permissie 


s HOWARD W. L 


pexer advertising director 


N SELLERS special 


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Take a sharp turn—switch to the 
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Test your breaks—see how she likes 

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DEAR PLAYBOY 


ÆJ оокеѕ PLAYBOY MAGAZINE - PLAYBOY BUILDING, 919 N. MICHIGAN AVE., CHICAGD, ILLINOIS 60611 


RALPH GINZBURG 
Ralph Ginzburg's personal philosophy 
(Playboy Interview, July) and his fight 
lor free expression are inspiring. He not 
only argues his case with conviction; he 
argues it well. I believe strongly in the 
ideals of total freedom of speech and 
press. and feel cheated in that I can по 
longer enjoy his publication Eros 
Jon L. Robinson 
Hopkins, Minnesota 


Your interview with Ralph Ginzburg 
continues your tradition of superbly 
preventing America’s most controversial 
figures. Ginzburg, unfortunately, has 
fallen m to one of the Supreme 


Court's most ridiculous decisions in 
many years. It is painful to see the Su- 
preme Court narrow its views on censor- 
ship and obscenity in a decade that has 


seen such large steps forward in other 
arcas of individual freedom. 
Arthur F. Sewall 
Bridgeton, New Jersey 


In your Ginzburg interview, that He- 
brew mentions me. I can only reply, alt- 
er having seen a copy of Ginzburg's Eros 
(in which, among other unspeakable out 
rages, Ginzburg printed a full-page color 
photograph in great detail of a naked 
black buck ii obvious sexual embrace 
with a white girl), that, while I agree 
that anybody should have the right of 
free political expression, the printing of 
such degenerate filth as Eros should very 
properly entitle the publisher to а long 
term at one of Uncle Sam's “gray-bar 
Hiltons” at Atlanta or Leavenworth. Be 
fore mealymouthed bleeding hearts, lib 
стаз and other mushheads shed too 
many tears over Mr. Ginzburg, | suggest 
they examine a copy of his Eros. Even 
our degenerate Supreme Court found it 
too much to stomach. Heil Hitler! 

George Lincoln Rockwell 
Commander, American Nazi Party 
Arlington, Virgini; 

As your letter. clearly shows, Com- 
mander, one man's “free political ex- 
pression” can be another's “degenerate 
filth.” Ginzburg’s point was that every- 
one—even you—should be entitled to 
speak out, regardless of what he has to 
зау. We're not surprised to see that 
you're unwilling to go that far. 


In the July ptaysoy, Ralph Ginzburg 
mentions the Fros photo feature “Black 
1 White Colon" w 
people believe was the pi 
for his conviction. | graduated from the 
School of Photography at Rochester In 
stitute of Technology, and I know the 
man who did these lovely photos of the 
Negro man and white girl embracing 
He was Ralph Hattersley, a former pro- 
fesor at RIT. The color, the balance 
and the tasteful handling of the subject, 
in my opinion, make “Black and White 
in Color” the most beautiful and artist 
ly successful feature Eros ever printed 
Anyone who could call that wonder 
ful piece of photographic art "obscene 
is mentally 


lcohm 5. Мого 
Rochester, New York 


In the Ginzburg interview, rLavnoy 
provided us with the portrait of a m 
who is violently and joyously alive and 
unafraid; and as a comparison, you 
offered in April the picture of a man as 
frightened and. vicious—and, therefore, 
as dangerous—as à wounded anim 
George Lincoln Rockwell. It was an i 
teresting comparison. Fortunately, in 
spite of Rockwell, or Robert Shelton, 
or those five justices of the Supreme 
Court who are so reluctant to admit 
the 
Rand, 


that they are made of flesh, we ha 
Ayn 


likes of Ralph Ginzburg, 
Barry Goldwater, Madaly nd 
Praynoy—unafraid to spi defense 
of freedom and the individual and opti 
mistic enough to think that someday the 
world might grow up. 


ton J. Loveridge 
Cocoa, Florida 

ions on the searching, 

5 nrerviews that you have 


published in recent issues: The current 
one with Ralph Ginzburg and the recent 
ones with George Lincoln Rockwell and 
Robert Shelton were simply firs 
PLAYBOY is the only national m. 
that will stick its neck out and help clear 
the air. 


te. 


Paul Carroll 
Chicago, Illinois 
Poet Carroll is no turtle himself. 
While poetry editor of The Chicago Re 
view, literary magazine of the University 


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of Chicago, he created a [uror as first 
publisher of William Burroughs’ 
Lunch.” 


I was surprised that Ginzburg an- 
sked: “I 
substantial proof were presented that a 
link does exist [between pornographic 
literature and sex crimes]. would you 
then say that hardcore pornography 
should be banned?” Ginzburg. justified 
his answer by the “clear and present 
danger" test, bur it is ridiculous to 
sume that if a link exists berwecn a facror 
and a crime, the factor should be banned. 
1 believe, with Justice Douglas, that 
“judges cannot gear the literary diet of 
an entire nation to whatever tepid мш 
is incapable of triggering the most de- 
mented mind." 

David Wilson 

South Lake Tahoe, Ca 


swered affrmirively when 


forni 


J am so damned mad 1 could chew the 
drapery! What has happened io this 
man coukl also happen to me for what 1 
think or for what 1 have said on many 
occasions. How сап 1 help him? H he is, 
in fact, imprisoned, will you please tell 
me where. so I can write a note to him 
every week—or perhaps send him ciga 
reucs, cigars, candy or whatever he may 
need? 


Joe B. Chapman, President 
Evans, Chapman & Holder 
Birmingham, Alabama 
AL this writing, Ginzburg is still а free 
man. He is appealing the severity of his 
‚ and although his plea for a re- 
sentence was rejected by the 
Pennsylvania District Court, il was 
scheduled to be heard September 12 by 
the U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals, 
which has meanwhile postponed his im 
prisonment. You can reach him directly 
at Fact, 110 West 40th Sirect, New York, 
New York 10018. For a suggestion on 
how to support him indirectly, sce the 
following letter. 


sente: 
duced. 


Having read your July interview with 
Ralph Ginzburg. it seems to me, as а 
news dealer, that there is something 
morc those of us in the field should be 
able to do than just register dismay at 
the verdict in the Eros. case 

he procensorship groups are well 
organized and well financed, and the Su 
preme ve them 
conside: 
numbers or merit. People who Icel they 
have the right ıo read whatever they 
wish should organize in the sume man. 
ner as these groups. Toward this end, 
est ways dealers and book. 


irn in the Eros case g 


ion out of proportion o their 


can you su 


sellers can be of help? 
Allred C. Sachs 

Washington News Company 

Phe 

The American. Civil Liberties Union 

does yeoman duty on behalf of free 


ix, Arizona 


speech and press, and you can write to 


them al 156 Fifth Avenue, New York 
New York. Unfortunately, their efforts 
on behalf of the First Amendment are 
sometimes diluted by their having to 
guard all ten clauses of the Bill of Rights 
with equal jealousy. Recently in several 
Mates, interested citizens like yourself 
have formed local groups devoted ex 
clus to combating the censor's scis 
sors. Amang the most active of these 
organizations has been The New Jersey 
Committee for the Right to Read, Box 
250. Caldwell, New Jersey. They will 
probably provide you with guidelines for 
setting up a similar organization in Ari 
zona. Other anticensorship activities are 
frequently discussed. in “The Playboy 
Forum.” 


If the consequences of the Ginzburg 
Mar weren't so tragic, the whole thing 
might well be entitled: 4 Comedy of 
Eros. 


James B. Allen 
Grand. Rapids, Michigan 


Ah, the poor Mr. Ginzburgs! They 
choose to exploit our frailties by their 
interpretation of the laws, and arc done 
such an injustice. when some maligned 
court has the audacity to disagree with 
them. But take courage, ficethinkers! A 
welbbehaving Ralph Ginzburg will be 
back among us soon, enabled by his sac 
rifice to rejoin the courageous men who 
oppose evil laws. Then our descent can 
continui 


Jeff McCoy 
Aurora, Illinois 
Descent to freedom? 


Though 1 think much of what Ginz 
burg published was impulsive and irra 
tional, 1 believe that censorship, because 
it threatens my rights 10 free speech, is 
dangerous in any form. The Supreme 
Court ruling in the Ginzburg case is un 


fortunate for all of us and. provides an 
other reason why the mail should not be 
handled by the Government. Rather, the 
mail should be the business of private 
competing agencies. Imagine how long a 
postal agency dependent on а public 
free to choose alternative service—could 


survive if it acquired а reputation. of 
tampering with mail entrusted to it. 
Paul Penoyl 
Boston, Massachusetts 


I cannot resit wondering if Ginz 
burg's conviction, on the basis ol his ad 
vertising. means that magazines carrying 
ads for Eros are guilty as well? And, if 
so, what about the ones curying ads for 
those, and so on, ad infinitum? 

Hermann J. Muller 

Bloomington, Indi 

vrAYmOY is delighted to receive this 

provocative conjecture from the pen of 

Dr. Muller, distinguished geneticist and 

biologist, former associate of the late 

Alfred Kinsey, and winner of the Nobel 
ze in physiology in 1916. 


na 


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Just because you're a white-collar 
worker, you don't have to wear 
а white shirt. They're out. Colors 
and stripes ore in. 


Of course, if you don't want to 
work hard or dress right, you could 
try to marry the boss! daughter. 


CRICKETEER" 


PALMER SCORES 
I'm no Marlene Bauer, but I love golf. 
Reading Peter Andrews The Day Arnold 
Palmer Was Blackballed . . . was mot 
only fun but also scored a point for us 
“pro” amateurs here in Shaker Heights. 
Three cheers for Peter Andrews. 
Iris Lembreche 
Shaker Heights, Ohio 


I was fit to be tied after reading the 
so-called “humor” about Arnold Palmer 
in the July issue. The article was not 
humorous at all. In fact, it was a vicious 
putdown of a fine professional golfer— 
my favorite on the pro tour. 1 can see 
why Amie quit at nine holes. 1 know 
that 1 could not stand half (hat many 
with such a blowhard. 

Kirk Dye 
Nonh Platte, Nebraska 

Back to the tec, Kirk. You missed the 

ball completely. 


CHINESE PUZZLE 

1 enjoy your magazine. I believe that 
its pictures and cartoons and its interest 
ing bits of humor are a definite. and 
valuable service in these tense and. trou 
bled times. However, 1 cannot see that 
Мах Lerners arde (Red China, the 
U.S. and the U.N., вълувоу, July) has 
added any information or ideas (hat 
haven't been mulled over many, many 
times before by various writers. Frankly, 
The New Republic, The Nation, The 
Progressive and The Worker handle the 
subject much better or worse (according 
10 your views) 


Perhaps we сап prevent Foreign 
Affairs, U.S. News & World Report or 
Scientific American from running “girlie 
pictures” if you will stick to that which 
you do so well. I recall the remarks of a 
theater critic upon seeing John Barry- 
more play Hamler in his later years 
"The performance did nothing for 
Hamlet and less for Barrymore." 

William G. Bray 
0.5. House of Representatives 
Washington, D.C 

We're pleased to learn that you enjoy 
rLavnoy, Congressman, but we think the 
publication's popularity is directly re- 
lated to the balance it provides between 
thought-provoking 
themes and its lighter pictorial, satirical 
and service features. For another Con 
gressional appraisal of Lerners piece, 
swe the following letter. 


articles. on serious 


Two sentences from Max Lerner’ 
Red China, the U.S. and the U.N. 
succinctly state a basic element of the 
UN that seems to escape much of our 
"The UN is not 
community of 
operative de facto. regimes. It is an as 
ts that do actual 
ly exercise power, and that therefore 
have the right, the responsibility and the 
need to belong to a world body that 


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deliberates, debates and (in some arcas) 
makes decisions on the great issues that 
shape the future.” 
As the American 
civil-service bur cept 
this “prag-idealist” view of the UN—in 
stead of the idealistic platitudes of the 
left or the dogmatic rigidity of the right 
—we will sec great strides made toward 
our true policy objective: à world free 
from the threat of aggression, one 
which Franklin Roosevelt's four free. 
doms have meaning for all men 
Ronald Brooks Cameron 
Foreign Allairs Committee 
U.S. House of Representatives 
Washington, D.C. 


people and their 


ucracies come te 


Accordi 
reasoning, businessmen should invite the 


to Max Lerner. specious 


Mafia to join the chamber of com 
merce. After all, the Mafia is а business, 
it has a de facto existence and it repre 


sems а lot of people. Who cares il it 
plays by different rules? The simple fact 
which Lerner blithely brushes 
that the UN is intended to be an organi 


zation ol freedom-loving countries. By 
no amount of double talk can this 
definition be stretched. to include Red 


China. "The fact that other countries ol 
Ching’s ilk are already in the UN (by 
virtue of historical accident) chan 


things not at all. Two wrongs, Lerner 
notwithstanding, sill don't make a 
right. 

‘Admittedly, it is a bit «ийси to 


define “freedom-loving” nowadays, but 
how's this for openers: The government 
docs not shoot people who disagree with 
it, and there's a free press, When the 
Chinese rulers are willing to accept these 
principles, they will be welcome in the 
UN. Until then, who needs them? 
Werner K. Stiefel 
Oak Hill, New York 


It is encouraging to find an American 
writer like Max Lerner sufficiently can 
did to point out that under the original 
provisions of the UN Charter, the 
United States, on the basis of its present 


policies, would not qualify for member 

ship. The Charter demands “respect for 
1 

the principle of equal rights and self 


Members are 
to refrain from the threat or 


determination of peoples 
required 
use of force." Membership in the United 
Nations is open only to “peace-loving 
states" that accept the obligations of the 
Charter, If Lerner succeeds in introduc 
common sense 


ing some into opinion 
in the United States, more power to him. 
Professor Joan Robinson 
Faculty of Economics and Politics 
University of Cambri 


Cambridge, England 


T greatly enjoyed Max Lerner's article 
on Red China in your July issue. It was 


one of the few times an author has 


presented both the pros and cons of 


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16 ШОШО ДЕШЕТ ИЕТ NS 


diplomatic recognition of Red China by 
the U. S. and the Ir. Lerner, being 
on the side of the pros, puts forth some 
convincing arguments 10 back up his 
views. But for me he succeeded in doing 
just the opposite of what he set out to do. 
He has convinced me, KL others, I am 
sure, of the folly of recognizing Commu. 
nist. Chi admitting her to the 
United > 
Lerner maintains that the U.S. Gov- 
emment should adopt a more pragmatic 
attitude toward Red € He states 
that Red China will have, “belore an- 
other decade. chance for the kind of 
major confrontations—with the Soviet 
Union and with America—that it has 
thus far avoided." Lerner admits that 
admission of Red China to the UN as 
well as recognition by the U.S. would 
strengthen that country. What, then, 
could be more pragmatic than our cur 
rent policy of postponing that confron 
lation by denying ла the added 
strength of our recognition? 
Ray F. Bictz 
San Francisco, Calilornia 
А foreign policy based on the assump- 
tion that a military confrontation with 
Communist. China is inevitable (an as- 
sumplion Lerner never made) can serve 
as the justification for otherwise un 
thinkable acts on the pari of America, 
including outright aggression (i.e, "pre- 
venialive war"). If one accepts, as a more 


reasonable premise for U.S, foreign 
policy, the continuing possibility of 


peace, as well as war—with a peaceful 
solution to international conflicts clearly 
established as goal—then Lerner 
argues the need for improving means of 


our 


communication between countries, and 
that is precisely what bringing Red 
China into the UN would do. 


BATFAN 

For over 25 years E have maintained 
that I was the staunchest Batman fan in 
the nation, but since your July issue, I 
now have а new faverite—the fabulous 
atgirl. I know not who lurks be 
t cobalt cowl—but Holy Two- 
e Spread!—it certainly isn't Robin, 
Boy Wonder! 


Biljo White 
Editor, Batmania 
Columbia, Missouri 


OY! 


oy, 
I've just read the first installment of 
On the Secret Service of His Majesty the 


Que 
Irs hi 
a show or picture for me. 
Henny Youngman 
New York, New York 


1 (PLAYBOY, July) by Sol Weinstein. 
rious and 1 wish Sol would write 


About that devastating explosion at 
the Mother Margolies Activated Old 
World Chicken Soup Factory in the 
July Oy Oy Seven installment: Did the 


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PLAYBOY 


18 


IRS VIN VUNCHINC CO. INC. KEW YORK NY 


explosion also take all those Raleigh 
coupons with it? H so, poor M; She'll 
never get her nuclear reactor 
Robert J. Goldman 
Miami University 
Oxford. Ohio 
There's still hope, Bob: M's Green 
Stamps survived. 


A THING OF BEAUTY 
Unhappiness is rrvnov doing only a 
three-page spread on the Ford GT40 


(The Bespoke Ford, July) I wish it 
could have been six, or a dozen. Thanks 
very much, though, for the article 


chine like u 
car bull. 


at is beauty personi 


Low 
Columbus, Georgia 


Robert L. 


PLAYBOY PARODY 

I think your readers will be amused 
by this cover of a PLAYBoy parody which 
appeared in the 125th Birthday number 
of Punch, the English humor magazine. 
For Punch’s preview of the 125th Amni- 
verry Issue of our favorite American 
magazine, your illustrious Editor Pub 
lisher was good enough to take time 
away from the writing of his eleven- 
thousand, six-hundred and filty-tirst 
installment of The Playboy Philosophy 


All the finer inns 
serve Heineken. 
It's been that way 
for 374 years. 


The great beer from the diligent 
Dutch is pompered with spe- 
cially chosen hops ond malt 
slow-brewing in gleoming cop- 
per vessels. . three long months 
of oging ond 374 years of Dutch 
skill. It's quite a bit of trouble, 
we know. But that’s how we get 
great beer once every batch. 
You con get it in bottles or on 
draft. 


(which Punch included in its parody) to 
pose for this ferching cover illustration 
in nought but Bunny cars, monokini, 
cottontail and pipe 


Charles Elwood 

London. England 
P.S. Your Bunny Club 
smasher—there's nothing that coi 
with it over here, and it's causing a 


London isa 


ares 


sen. 


sation—although the British press seems 
tO suspect that all the recent publicity 
given to "swinging London сапу 
been a Playboy promotion timed to coin 
cide with the opening of your plush Park 
Lane establishment 


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FACT-BOOK TD ОЕРТ. Р-10, CROTON WATCH CD., 
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CROTON 
CHRONOMASTER 


goes steady goes steady goes steady goes stead 


CONNERY COMMENTARY 

Your July isue showed pictures of 
Sean Connery (Seam Connery Strikes 
gain!) im carpet cleaners uniform 
identical to my own—except for the com- 
1 e. It is quite a shock to find 
that people outside the wade are picking 
up our little secret. We carpet. cleaners 
juently confronted by 
dressed young w who make our 
1 love my job— 
and after your Connery photos, I don't 
need to explain why. 


ате fr 


Monsey, New York 


APPLE BLOSSOMS 
Orchids to rtavnoy for recognizing 
Rex Stewart for the great artist he is 
(Slices of the Apple. July). Rex himself 
is more unusual than the unbelie 
sounds he so easily coaxes from his wun 
pet. A fine, humble, unpretentious, un- 
assuming man—and a real pro. T 
you so much. 
Cal and Phyllis Burch 
Garden Grove, California 


Je 


Rex Stewart's Slices of the Apple in 
your July issue was just too good to be 
Having borne the stigma of being 
years, the nost 
ing Slices was worth 
million bucks. Please let him expo 
on the Thirties, the Forti 
That cat can write up a storm. 

Edw. 


sulfe 


nd 
and onward 


LOVE THAT LUAU 
Another for PLaynoy. 
Mario's recipe in your June issue (Ur 
ban Luau) not only brought back. pleas 
ant memories of Hawaii but ignited my 
desire for that tasty, delicate, cool but 
hot Korean appetizer, Kim Chee. I 
whipped up a batch imme nd 
my taste buds told me it is authentic. To 
who reminded me of 
that delicious side dish that makes rice 
worth while, my internal gratitude? 
Robert С. Carpenter 
Manta, Ecuador 


"Thomas. 


WHO'S LAUGHING? 
1 have just finished reading 
Laugh Unless I's Funny by Willi Sa- 
royan (PLayuoy, July) 1 didn't laugh 
Mr. Saroyan failed to give his readers the 
all-important emotion e that ds 
necessary in good fiction, In fact, it left 
me feeling that 1 had slyly been led to 
the top of a flagpole and left there. What 
rLAYsOY needs is a fine story with a 
punch finish by Oscar Wilson. 
Oscar Ма 
Manchester, New Hampshire 
Never heard of him. 


Don’t 


Great new taste, 
rich aroma... 


pipe tobacco does it. 


Enjoy America's 
besttasting 
pipe tobacco in 
a filter cigarette! 


sZ licae ا‎ 


19 


PLAYBOY 


20 


GREAT LOOK. 


JUST ENOUGH BITE. 


ALLIGATOR. 


The Alligator Company, New York, St. Louis, Chicago, Los Angeles. 


^ |. 
You can’t beat the close-ups for telling | 
the story. That’s why, on an Alligator, 


even the pockets talk fashion. A Gold 
Label Gabardine, $55, With warmer, 
$69.95. At fine stores everywhere 


PLAYBOY AFTER HOURS 


hanks to Telstar, the right of private 

enterprise to exploit outer space is 
now a firmly established  principle—es 
tablished, in fac, by a United Nations 
resolution, But A. T. & Ts celebrated sat 
elite is still the only privately owned 
space vehicle aloft, and the question is 
ats taking private industry so long to 
to space? In view of the priceless 
primetime television exposure made 
available free of charge to NASA for 
из moon probes and orbital dockings, 
one can only wonder why those gifted 
with our fabled American know-how are 


not already locked in а toothand- nail 
competition for supremacy in space 
Think what a flight to Mars, for example, 


could do for the Pepsi-Cola Compi- 
ny. For one thing, Pepsi could immedi 
mely rechannel all the funds it now 
squanders on TV advertising into its 
space program. There would be no need 
10 spend millions trying to convince con 
sumers that only squares drink Соке 
when the mere sight of the Pepsi-Cola 
rocket—designed, of course, in the shape 
of a Pepsi Боше emblazoned with the 
ar label and topped with a red, 
white and blue boule capsule housing 
Pepsinaut Joan Crawlord—would inspire 
Americans of all ages to join the Pepsi 
generation forthwith. It would no doubt 
also send the Coca-Cola people back to 
the old drawing board to redesign their 
attractive but aerodynamically infelici 


tous bottle along the streamlined lines 
of ап Atlas Agena. 
We can see it now, simulcast on all 


three networks: the tenstory tower of 
Pepsi-l gleaming im the carly-morning 


sum on the launching pad at Cape Ken 
nedy; Commander. Crawlord-—winsomely 
wired in her chic black-patentleather 
trash helmet and Dell-bouomed, hip. 
hugger silverJamé space suit and boots 
(by Courréges)—ensconeed in the cap- 
sule's cabin. (molded chair and walnut 
console by Knoll and Associates) for 
the pre launch. checkol of on-board in 
suumentation and telemetry, Us launch 
minus 78 minutes and all systems are go- 
go when suddenly there's a hold in the 


countdown: A malfunction has been dis- 
covered in a petcock controlling the flow 
of Pepsi concentrate into the softdrink 
achine dat will dispense Commander 
Crawford’s sole sustenance in light. Mil- 
lions wait in suspense to learn if the mis- 


sion will have to be scrubbed, but Pepsi 
Control reports that the trouble is mi- 
nor and that the feed line will be A-OK 
within a matter of minutes. It remains 
only to plug in the freezing unit of the 
cabin ice-cube tray and to make certain 
that the necessary four-month supply of 
dimes for the soda machine is safely 
stowed on board. 

The boule capsule is then sealed. the 
gantry rolled the umbilicals de- 
tached, and the voice of Pepsi Control 
in Houston concludes the countdown as 
millions hold their breaths: “Five, Four. 
Three, Two, One—Zerot” It's a perfect. 


Шо, and stage one—the boule portion 
of the rocket—is jettisoned without a 
hitch; it’s recovered an hour later off the 


coast of Puerto Rico in the net of a San 
Juan fisherman, who returns it to Pepsi 
lor the $12,000,000 deposit. As the cap- 
sule passes over Pepsi's Grand Cayman 
downrange tacking station in the Babi- 
mas, Huntley and Brinkley interrupt 
their commentary for а live pickup vi 
radio of the Pepsinaut’s impromptu ren- 
jon ol the Pepsi jingle from 00 miles 
aloft; there isn’t a dry eye in the block 
house. The first day in space is high- 
whted by a televised interlude outside 
the capsule, during which Commander 
Crawford, at the end of oot nylon 
tether, sets a new space record for the 
U.S. by drinking history's first extra- 
vehicular Pepsi 

During the next month, Pepsi-l passes 
the drifting derelicts of several unsuc 
cessful carlier Mats probes: Nabisco's ill- 
fated Mallo-Mars (whose milk-chocolate 
heatshield was penetrated by a meteor 
shower), Chun Kings Flying Fortune 
Cookie, which lost its fortune during 
liftoff (a later they wanted 10 
send up another one), Diet Rites No Cal 
Jeroboam (aborted when it failed to 
achieve а state of weightlessness), He- 


dii 


hour 


brew National's Kosher Special, designed 
in the shape of a pastrami on rye (which 
veered into the sun when its revolution 
агу solid-liquid rocker Iuel—chicken fat 
and seluer—tailed (o ignite), amd a 
previously uncon Russian rocket 
(config, Commander 
Crawford's eyeball sighting, along the 
airfoil lines of a 100-proof vodka bottle; 
the Drand name, of course, being security 
formation, is not divulged) 

The rest of the flight proceeds without 
а hitch: soft landing on Mars, planting 
the flag of the Pepsi Geographical. Soci- 
ety. establishing the first extraterrestrial 
Pepsi franchise (“Who's going to drink 
the мш?” ask Coca-Cola's PR people). 
the long voyage home, safe splashdown 
and recovery, debriefing. television in- 
terviews, world-wide headlines, the Pep- 
sinaut’s firseperson story of the flight 
exclusively in Life—and then. at long 
last, Pepsi's finest hour. as Commander 
Crawford is invited to the White House 
and decorated by the President. for 
her history-making achievement: becom- 


rmed. 


ed, according to 


ing the first Academy Award winner 
to cam the Congressional Medal of 
Honor. for bringing free enterprise to 


the Red Planet. 


We were surprised not to find the fol 
lowing Los Angeles Times hcadlin 
the front. page- ROAD TO RE HONORED AS 
MAN OF THE YEAR—UnLi] we read on and 
discovered, not without some dixappoin 
ment, that the party involved was a local 
construction leader and philanthropist 
named Eli Broad. 


on 


An elegant used-car agency in m 
town Manhattan, according to a sign in 
its window, is now selling PRE-OWNED 
CADILLACS. 


A broadcasting trend reached its in- 
exorable conclusion when the Federal 
Communications Commision approved 
the one-year test of a radio station that 
will present nothing but ads and "public- 


21 


PLAYBOY 


22 


Spalding gives you the professional edge. 


"Oooocooocoocoooff! Know how it feels to be fumbled спа pounced on 
by a bunch of 260 Ib. bruisers? A Spalding's gotta be tough 
We get thrown, clutched, mauled, gouged and booted all over the place. 
But watch thot rough stuff, fellas. 
If anyone gets the wind knocked out, it won't be me.” 


You have to 
look for the “W” 
because it's 
silent. 


Wrangler" the 
wreal no-iron 
jeans. 


When you wear these lean and lively 
Wrongler jeans—they wresist wrinkling. 
When they're woshed and dried—they come 
ovt wready to go. They're 50% polyester/ 
50% cotton treated with Wranglok*, a wre- 
markcble permanent press finish. 
White, wheat, pewter green, blue denim, 
28 to 36. Permanently creased, obout $6. Au- 
thentic wround leg, about $5. 
Wrangler for her, too. Wrangler Jeons, 
bo Fifth Ave., N.Y. 10001. 


(ls wright here! 


le ives euwe wei, ime, тта злами mates m тє wear 


service announcements.” The station will 
broadcast from Los Angeles under the 
call letters КАР. 


Social scientists in Great Britain re- 
cently completed à. mammoth study of 
sexual mores among several thousand 


English teenage gils. Questionnaires 
were dutifully filled out and. returned, 
and (he results fed into а computer — 


which promptly rejected. gle card. 


On it was one young lady's answer to the 
question "Are you a virgin?” Her reply: 
“Not yet. 


Found carved wit 
heart atop а ven 
Oregon. Colle; 
CLYTEMNESIRA 


an arrow pierced 
ble desk at Southern 
in Ashland. Orc E 
OVES AGAMEMNON. 


Porential depositors at New York's 
Marine Midland Trust Company will 
be reassured to learn that Midland's 
new 40-story 
tion on ? 


wnder constr 
u Street, had а sign on it 
ANOTHER PROJECT REING FI- 
E CHASE MANHATTAN BANK, 


Line forms to the left for the follow 
ing job, listed under vacanc 
Pakistan News; "Inspector of 
Department of Explosives. Tempor 


Ladies in distress may be interested to 
know that the Anchorage, Alaska, tcle- 
phone directory lists a Dr. L. D. Ekvall, 
who offers 24-hour service in “Obstewies, 
Gynecology, Inserti 


According to 
Australian Associated Press, police 


m circulated by the 
0 


ed a student party at ће University of 
Oklahoma and "uncovered marijuan: 
barbiturates and other drugs, as well as 


erature on homosexuality, torture and 
criticism. of U.S. policy in Vietnam. 

We've Heord oj Custom Cars, but 
This Is Ridiculous Department: Listed 
among the accoutermenis of a 1963 MG 
Midget offered for sale on the classified 
age of Mississippi's Jackson Daily News 
were "8 bedrooms and den.” 


In the last few years, science has fron- 
tally assaulted the dogmas of our youl 
Experimental inquiry has given the lie 


out, will never improve your vi 
it fu ntities will turn 
your eyes yellow), шу has 
bested that ubiquitous nemesis of our 
boyhood, cod-liver oil (which.— just as we 
knew all along—is bad [or children) 
And now comes word that yet another 
long-cherished maxim must be ated 
to the status of old wives tales. The 
news arrives in an imposing 246-page 


treatise entitled The Role of the Drink- 
ing Driver in Traffic Accidents. Herein, 
fixe researchers at the Indiana Universi 
1y Department of Police Administration 
set forth for the first time the surprising 
facts behind that oft-heard admonition: 
‘AL you drink, don't drive.” Among their 
conclusions: "Based on the data collected 
and the method of analysis used, subjects 
with blood alcohol levels of 03 per 
cent [the eq pout two one 
ounce drinks in a 160-pou lc] are 
about one third less likely 10 cause an 

t than. completely sober drivers." 
Before you beat а path to the comer bar 
for a few quick shots of highway safety, 
we must add that the study shows t 
after dhe second drink the lik 
accident increases precipitously. After 
four drinks, the estimated probability of 
2 n accident is double that 
of the tcetotaling driver. Nev 
it's comforting to t 
might save as many lives as a seat b 


d n 


ac 


Ts 


ihood of 


on 


In addition о free breakfast in bed 
according 10 an ad in the l'ancomver 
Sun, the local Payk Town Motel offers a 
kitchenette and. “frig in every unit” 

Isk a Silly Question Department: 
an Upstate New York housewile 
ader rifling her 
living room zo. reports Grit, 
she blurted. “What are vou doing?” "Td 
really rather not discuss it," he shouted 
as he fled from the house. 


"Fo whom it may concer A classified 
ad in the Oakland Tribune solicited the 
services of 7 ced in 
man, 


NICS, experi 
. Apply 901 G 


On his way out of а Washing 


D. C., theater after seeing Golfing 
friend of ours swears he overheard on 
lady sty to another: “Now aren't you 
glad you didn’t vote for him? 


Sign of the times меси on a theater 
marquee in Covington, Kentucky: vius 
MoviE окон ADULTS  ONLY—CHILDREN 
UNDER 12 FREE. 


NASA, take m 
latest catalog, the C 
is ollevir a course 
study of the moon—that includes "two 
held trips." 


According to its 
iversity of Alabama 
ology—the 


License-plate number seen on a hearse 
New Haven, Connecticut: U-2 


A recent want a 
Town Voice listed 
Spelling” among the 
for а secretarial post in the psychology 


Chicago's Old 
xb Typing a 


J People who care 
about the martini 
have given it 
a first name. 


BEEFEATER. 


First name for the marti 


„те ALL-PURPOSE MEN'S LOTION, $2.00, $3.50, $6.50 
-the ALL-PURPOSE SPRAY LOTION, $5.00 (refill $2.00) 

...the SHAVING CREAM, $2.00. . ће PRE-SHAVE LOTION, $1.50 
-.-the ALL-PURPOSE POWDER, $1.50. .. the DEODORANT STICK, $1.00 
he AEROSOL DEODORANT, $1.50...the SHOWER SOAP ON A CORD, $2.00 

+ GIFT SETS from $3.00 to $10.00 


MEM COMPANY, INC., NORTHVALE, NEW JERSEY 


23 


PLAYBOY 


24 


mıscone TOILETRIES S 
NEW YORK. 


MOONSHINE's 
quicker'n likker. 


Moonshine, jugged elegance . . . great 
for makin" hay. Cologne, After-Shave, 
Saturday Night Soap, Gift Sets .. . 
mountain style. At the best stores 
everywhere. For mini-jug of Moonshine 
send 25¢ in stamps to Hi-Score Toiletries, 
Dept. P., 421 W. 28th St, N Y. 


How did a Bourbon 
you've never tasted 
become the 
best-selling Bourbon 


in Kentucky, 
the home of 
Bourbon? 


‘Yellowstone Distillery Co. fa 


ntuckians know urbem, 
must be Yellowstone's taste 
? 


Smoothness. Try 


department at Northwest 
Medical School. 


n University's 


We had no idea how desperate the 
draft boards were becoming until we no- 
ticed this headline in the Rochester 
New York, Democrat and Chronicle: 
CHILDLESS FATHERS 10 nF CALLED. 


A British correspondent informs us 
that (he father of à l6-vearokd Ha 
1 who is to work in West 
many as a maid applied to Lloyd 
London for a policy to insure his daugh- 
ters virginity. He was turned dow 
bad risk, presumably. 


MOVIES 


With The Wrong Box, producer-direc 
tor Bryan Forbes delivers a rolli 
farce in which some of Britain's more 
astute actors play the balmiest lot of 
Victorian tintypes ever to fall off a 
Having dug up an old tale by 
rt Louis Stevenson and Lloyd Os- 
far off iis o 
" into à bin of a film 
h one of the funniest chase finales in 
years. All revolves around a nust fund 
vhich the last survivor of a roomful 
itish schoolboys can lay claim. The 
picture stalls slightly in cutting down 
the field with a few too m 
deaths, but it only à mom 
ause. From there on, such occa 
lapses serve only as breatlrcatchers, 
what happens to the two surviving claim- 
ants and their heirs is completely mad. 
When John Mills, as the older of the 
two claimant brethers, lures his sibling 
10 his sickroom and tries to. murder 
him, Ralph Richardson, the intended. 
victim, is much 100 serenely sell centered 
ıo know wi on. Only when 
Mills, exasperated by thi nvulnerabili- 
ty. bl out what he ly thinks of 
him docs Richardson stalk off, his fect 
ings hurt. Catching the flowers from a 
se Mills hurls altcr him, he say 
late for apologies." There follows 
as blend of the old wron; 
carries the picture to йз tiot- 
ous end. A rich assorment of. characters 
is provided by such t 
Peter Sellers, Michael Caine, Peter Cook, 
Dudley Moore, Tony Hancock, Wilfrid 
Lawson and Irene. Handl. Sellers’ drunk 


ploy d 


room full of 
А mad murderer 


м5 is а comic inspiration. 
iting in a railway 
x of the garrulous 
is a fine pony stoke. But 
. everything about this film is Im 
granily potty—and flagrantly enjoyable. 


эне of the nas 
tiest movies ever made, it is also one of 
the clumsiest, In choppy starts and stops. 
rushing the story forward only to flash it 


Madem 


back awkwardly, di 
son slaps Jean Gen 
onto film with embarrassing seriousness, 
seizing and wrenching every sexual sym- 
bol discovered since Lady Chatterley lay 
with her gamekceper. As the Mademor 
selle of the title, a schoolteacher in a 
er French farm village. Jeanne 
u docs every weird thing her direc- 
tor tells her to, the circles under her eyes 
wholly suitable for a frustrated virgin 
who spends most of her evenings sub- 
Timating her sexual drives by setting fire 
to other people's haystacks. The hero at 
these conllagrations is always Ettore Man 
itinerant I woodcutter whose 
brawn and hairy chest, plus a 
local reputation as a skilled ram, are the 
very reasons that Moreau has turned 
firebug. She goes forth to do her dirt so 
that later, eyes glazed, she can watch her 
пайа sweatily sive the day. Ultimately 
the villagers pin the blame for the dep- 
ations on the Italian, but not before 
ia Moreau, has decimated 
al population by fire, flood and 
poison. Apart from miss sliughi 
helpless rabbit is grabbed by the legs 
beaten to death against a pile of logs 
and Moreau has the opportunity to palm 
a partridge’s new-laid eggs and slowly 
squeeze them until the shells pop and 
the yolks spurt. When she is certain that 
the villagers will turn their wrath on the 
woodcutter, Moreau goes to him in the 
forest. Her aim is to be had; his, to have; 
as is all too dearly symbolized by a snake 
that unwinds from around his waist and 
slithers smoothly over her trembling 
wrist—the high comic point of the mov- 
ic. Snake ultimately jettisoned. the lov- 
ers move into the woods for a moonlit 
night of earthy love, she howling like 
licking 


"s morbid sereenpl 


son, 


the ani 


dog, crawling in the dirt for 
his chin, his nostrils 
boot with the quivering Hat of her pret- 
ty pink tongue. Richardson gets us right 
up in there, among all the glistening 
orbs and salivating orifices, to feed, if we 
fancy it, on all the fetishistic flapdoodle 
he cam think of. How Sade to watch 
Tony Richardson's craft ebbing, 

Run, don't walk, to Welk, Don't Ron. It 
will restore your faltering faith in Holly- 
woods ability to produce comedy in the 
archest style, with witty ripostes and 
ides as sharp as Jim Hutton's shoulder 
blades or Samantha Eggar's checkbon 
These two contribute their comic talents 
to a vintage story in which they play 
Troilus and Cressida to Cary Grants 
souciant Unde Pandarus. Predictabi 
is old smoothie Grant who makes Walk, 
Don't Run the rare thing it is. The script 
is marred by many an offense 
logic. but bad Sir William. Rutland 
м) been able to find a hotel room 
Tokyo for the 1964 Olympics, or 
Miss Christine Easton (Е 
Ivertised a Hat to share, or had Sir Wil- 
m not taken an altogether inexplicable 


Scorcher— A fast-comering casual with 
racy, rolled sides, classic penny slot, and the hand- 
sewn front that's the gear-est look going. The colors? 
Wild! Whiskey. Cordo. Blazer blue. Sapling. And 
black grain. Climb into the Scorcher at your 
Pedwin dealer today. And take off. 

Most Pedwin styles from $10 to $15. (2 
Brown Shoe Company, St. Louis. Bed 


e " 


pedwin. 


young ideas in shoes 


— — 


£S 
There goes o guy going places in his Pedwin shoes. 


Of wanderlust and 
vagabonds. The 
sailor-ashore shirt 
... jaunty and 
unconcerned . . . to 
roam about from 
pier to beach... 
and, petchance, 
slip away 

to sea. 


THE WHALER” SHIRT . . . designed in the manner of the dress shirt sportingly 
accented with potch ond flop pockets, onchor buttons, and easily sloping tails. Daunt- 
less wool melton. Black Olive, Burgundy, Navy, Coffee, Dirty Comel. Sizes XS, S, M, 
L, XL. About $11.00 al Mocy's, New York & branches * The Metropolitan Co., Dayton 
+ Hughes-Haicher-Suffrin, Detroit & Pittsburgh ~ Emery Bird Thayer Co., Kansas City 
+ Bamberger's, Newark & branches . . . or write THE PETERS SPORTSWEAR CO., 
Philadelphia 19132. © matenas an tcov Perens at Hane 


25 


PLAYBOY 


26 


“Неге? proof it 
couldn't be a Sony” 


b, 


29054. 


Good Deduction... 
Wrong Conclusion! 


It IS a Sony 
The Simply Incredible 
Sonymatic 104 


Yes, anyone familiar with Sony quality 
could be thrown off the track by that 
$99.50 tag. But price isn't the only extra 
ordinary thing about the 104. It makes 
tape recording so simple that... well, 
you have no idea until you've seen — and 
beard — what this solid state high-fidelity 
portable can do. [] Tape threads so eas- 
ily onto the 104 you can do it blindfolded 
And Automatic Recording Control means 
the 104 records everything it hears — 
tomatically — and guarantees you рег 
fect hands-off recordings every time. How 
does the 104 play-back those recordings? 
It comes on like gangbusters. Tts 10 watts 
of power fill a room with superb Sony 
sound. [J The 104 has three speeds. Gets 
up to eight hours of recorded material on 
а scven-inch reel. Other Sony-quality fea- 
tures include auto shut-off, digital counter. 
pause and tone controls and an F-96 
mike. Simply incredible, incredibly simple 
— indubitably Sony! 

For literature on the 104 or the rest of 
the best from Sony, write to Superscope. 
inc, Sun Valley, California, Dept. G-12, 


America's First Choîce In Tape Recorders 


fancy t0 а rude lanky American Oly 
contest named Steve Davis (Hutte 
none of the musical-beds business i 
which they participate would have had a 
chance to en. пу jokes 
got off, out of the sack, at the expense of 
the Japanese, the Russians and the sport 
of speed walking, which happens to be 
Hutton’s specialty. Nor is any opportu 
nity missed to strike jokes oll Cary 
ng age as he searches for 
nd is persistently taken 
tique. relati 

at the British 


pic 


spec 


ers a brilliantly controlled perform: 
nce that stays with you after the shout- 
ig dies down. It is the only thing of any 
substance in Walk, Don't Run. Nev- 
ertheless, the insubstantial carries th 
day, and not a brittle bit of it should be 
missed 


Hotel Paradise is a bareíaced farce de 
liberately and lovingly wrought in the 
style of pre-World War One, when the 
theatergoing public had an inexhaust- 
ible appetite for confounded trysts. For 
lady to be mistaken for her maid, or vice 
versa, is funny as а pratiall into a 
compost pile or a pie in the puss. Even 
ne, this genre of comedy 
called for the eager suspension ol dis- 
belief at the very least: and modern 
idiences may have a little trouble main- 
ig sufficient suspension to appre 
ciate Hotel Paradiso. Peter Glenville. 
produc reposed his trust. 
principally the comic talentis of Alec 
Guinness and Robert Morley t0 keep au- 
diences laughing in spite of themselves 
md то pop out 
т dress and make little moues with 
her mouth, and Peggy Mount is the per- 
fect battleax. She and Guinness ave a 
Gallic Maggie and Jiggs—he i m 
flight from home and hearth, she deter- 
mined and quite able to lock him in his 
room. But she gets a note advising h 
that her sister in the country is ill and 
that she must come at once, and exits 
stage right, leaving Guinness at liberty to 
make an tion with Lollebrigi 
Morley’s wife, ay the low Hotel 
diso. By a mischance, Morley, hidde 
hind a brisiling mustache left over f 
the Franco-P is in the Para- 
diso that very night to check the pi 
ty. Naturally. 


s own 


cons 


gen i 
more characters than can possibly be ca 
loged here go dashing through the cor 
ridors in various stages. of alarm 
undress. There is plenty of g 
to suit the lush costumes and furis 
of the time, and. Guinness 
are as funny as their он 
roles allow, the net result being а preity 
period piece. Period. 


and 
ecous cok 


us 
nd Morley 


Most. films built around some excep 
tional robbery follow more or less the 


SPECIAL PRODUCTS Мон OF THE MATINAL BREWING CO. BALTIMORE MO. 


Ijust had 

a completely 
unique experience 
-. my first Colt 45 
Malt Liquor. 


same format 
ecution of the crime and the personality 
conflicts among the criminals. But the 
crux of any such picture is the bigness or 
oddity of the crime, and Assault on о Queen 
certainly has the weightiest and most un- 
likely victim the liner Queen M 
rank Sinatra and company raise а su 
en World War Two German sub from 
the waters off the Bahamas in order to 
intercept the great ship « igh s 
Sinatra is drawn into the plot less by the 
bullion Mary carries than by the good 
jiggly stall Virna Lisi carries. She plays 
a blonde Neapolitan who is wealthy 
enough to finance this oce: 
natra strolls through hi 


off the memory ol Bogart. 
and is much helped by the dialog of Rod 
Alter some dawdling while the 
is and wrestles their 
ying temperaments into some order 
the film gets under way when the resur 
тесей U-boat heads off for its rendez 
vous with the Queen. Tony Franciosa 
ms less than comfortable as Sinatra's 
competitor for Mis Lisi, perhaps be 
cause character ten ds too 
weak to be a pl 
an escapade. 
sur 

the s 
the form 
role a t 
keeps your eye on him when things be 
gin to move, But the unmistakable stars 
are the U-boat, a collector's item owned 
by a man from New Haven, Connecti 
and the Mary. which can look both 
ighty sculed on a cali 
TC that The Idel. all about 
art students and a mother, would 
win a big following in this country il the 
dialog w п French or абат with 
English subtitles. I we are to | 
sistible attraction between a woma 
10 and a boy under 25, it would be bet 
ter te Anna Magnani than Jennifer 
Jones, of all people. God knows, Jenni 
fer tries. in one Galitzine or Pucci cos 
tume alter another, to suggest a wom, 
of cool charm and authority who objects 
та her son's bohemian friend while at 
tempting to ignore the itch the boy 
vates in her. Bur all her ellorts only 
indicate ihat wh ly trying 
so hard to do is move her upper lip. 
which, despite а dervish's litany of hip 
and head-tossing. remains rigidly «ill 
throughout. The younger folk come oll 
much better. Michael Parks, as the 
ng savage out to seduce his best 
nd's moth 
virility, appropriate to a character with 
zany morals. Johu Leyton, saddled with 
the role of the dominated son, has the 
harder job of sustaining his appeal while 
whining and sulking. but he does the 
job skillfully. Jennifer Hilary, too. 


sea. 


ve ine 
n over 


i she is 


displays a feline sort of 


Qs 
ARAN 


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27 


PLAYBOY 


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It's a remarkable camera; 

its features are exclusive. Under $160.00. 


Send us your very first AUTO-100 picture; 
it may be considered for publication. 


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emerges as an actress to watch. Here, as 
mistress of Parks and beloved of Leyton, 
who is waiting around for seconds, she is 
H grace and vulner ad bruised 
young love. Di ust be cred. 
ited with spots of brilliant direction 
before the high-tragedy high jinks arc 
performed. At that point of crisis. the two 
boys fall temporarily into cach other's 
ims, suggesting that irs really this 
ad not the ladies. 
The Idol would 


it peters out into 
to leave everybody 

vested or screaming. In Marseilles, 
maybe. In. Napoli, possibly. In London, 
nevel 


Alfred Hitchcock breaches the Berlin 
Wall in Torn Curtain, his 50th film, bur his 
East Germany is a lot of Hitchcockiana. 
There are plenty of people around who 
might think this has to be an improve- 
ment over his last few dogs. but unfort 


mately, the old master's guile is more 
posturing than substance, and praaically 
every gambit his story uses here is a soft 


echo of turns and twists from his 
pictures Paul Newman. as a his 
American scientist, Hits behind the Cui 
tain, presumably to emer into some si 
ster connection with the Communist 
world, He is closely followed by Juli 
Andrews, who as his fiancée is properly 
appalled at his actions. Both play grac 
fully the 
fore add no particular 


impeccable selves and there 
ustiness to the 


generally facile goings on. In Leipzig, 
Newman tries 10 outpoint a German 
scientist, played by Ludwig Donath, 


whose knowledge he needs to complete 
a formula that's been bothering him. 
There is a longish chase across country 
a a bus, with some sparks of the Hitch- 
cock wit and irony in the behavior of 
VOPO cops, but it's Ireewh all 
; the clutch never catches. Only 
acters docs one feel 
sure, 
n 


chi 
1 jolt of surprise or pl 
as when an Fast German police 
wants to know if they still say "Big deal 
in America. Even a killing takes longer 
than it used to. In these days, when the 
spy movie, under the influence of Flem. 
ing, Deighton and Le € has under 
gone so many changes so quickly, this 
hlm has the look of a buttoned-dewn 
shoe in a Madison Avenue bootery. How 
ever, unlike so many others in Holly- 
wood. Hitchcock can take comfort in the 
fact that his clichés are all his own. 

A Man Called Adom is a sad and wiled 
throwaway that, given a little time and 
attention, could have been a strong film 
Unhappily. Joe Levine elected to pull 
together on the quick and cheap. Th 
movie stars Sammy Davis Jr. as Adam 
Johnson. a legendary jazz trumpet. play 
cr who is way down on his luck, usually 
drunk, always lonely, carrying society's 


emasculation of the Negro male around 
in his soul and blowing his lament 
through his horn every time he gets a gig. 
Oddly. whenever he plays in public, his 
udience starts nudgir 

just the way audiences used to do du 
the old Ger movies. It’s enough 
to drive any musician to drink. 
to help overcome his persoi 
masculation problem. Johnson keeps a 

mobile of candy-striped rockets dancing 
above his bed as he entertains one ad- 
miring lady after another with all the 
tion of the ишу desperate 

Lots of w "s Davis, his 


a22 


in 

s until he gets hool 
yson, who comes on as a Southern civil 
ights demonstrator, all scrubbed checks 
ad inspiration. She brings to his bed 
and board the sort of zeal she earlier ex 
pended on desegregating lunch counters. 
but it turns out to be not enough. And 
her = awful end is that 
ng to tu to a good citi 
zen, she has taken all the fight out of 
him, thereby finishing what an ofay soci 
ety presumably. be conclusion. at 
once pretentious and mawkish. Davis 
and Tyson do nicely as the pros they 
are, and Louis Armstrong and 
ina, Jr. turn in remarkably good per 
Tormances as Tyson's grandfad 
Davis young white sycophant. Curious 
ly. it is veterans Peter Lawford and Ossie 
Davis who stand me 
rection Leo Penn neglects to give. 
uniformly good sounds throughout come 
to the sound track courtesy of Nat Ad- 
derley. About the only thing that multi 
threat performer Sammy Davis cannot 
do is blow jazz trumpet. 


on Cicely 


in need of the di 
Ihe 


What's big? Art's big. Paris is always 
big. What's big box office? Peter O'Toole 
is lately big box office. Audrey Hep 
burn is alw And what's 
pret is, O'Toole 
and Hepburn. Put them all together 
d they spell money, very big pretty 
everybody with a band in 
the per] g ОГ How to Steal a Mik 
lion. Its not entirely Technicolor slush. 
Hugh Griffith and Fli Wallach are in it, 
which helps enormously; for while nei- 
ther is at all pretty, both are very compe 
tent in their respective. roles as an art 
forger and а millionaire dupe. Hep- 
as Grillith’s nervous daughter, and 
O'Toole, as a detective hired by art dealer 
Charles Boyer, pl. stant lovers, 
plugged into each other the moment she 
advertently plugs him with an antique 
blunderbuss. Both faint, and it seems to 
De this common tendency lo swoon at 
the least alarm that. constitutes their mu- 
tual attraction, The big moment of the 
movie is their devious burglary. from a 
heavily guarded museum, of a priceless 
Cellini Fenns ihat is really a valueless 
phony—but it is a coup of too few laughs 


су for 


What a catch! 

Martini & Rossi Imported Vermouth 
for cocktails that purr. 
Sweet for captivating Manhattans. 
Extra Dry for prize Martinis. 
Try it in your own cage. 


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OUTSIDE THE U.S. AND CANADAIT'S CALLED VERMOUTH © 


PLAYBOY 


On your way to the polls... 
don't forget these winners on 
the Verve Ticket! 


Jimmy Smith, 
organ 

Hoochie Cooche Man 
V/V6-8667" 

Got My Mojo Workin’ 
V/V6-8641* 


Ella Fitzgerald, 
female singer 
Ella At Duke's Place 
V/V6-4070* 

Ella in Hamburg 
V/V6-4069* 


Stan Getz, 
tenor sax 

Getz/ Gilberto No. 2 
V/V6-8623* 

Getz au Go Go 
V/V6-8600* 


Count Basie, 
big band 
Basie's Beatle Bag 
V/V6-8659* 
Arthur Prysock/ 
30 Count Basie V/ V6-8646* 


Wes Montgomery, 
guitar 

Tequila V/ V6-8653 
Goin’ Out of My Head 
V/V6-8642 


Cal Tjader, vibes 
El Sonido Nuevo 
V/V6-8651* 

Soul Burst V/V6-8637* 


Johnny Hodges, 
alto sax 

Wings and Things 
V/V6-8630 

Stride Right V/ V6-8647 
with Earl ‘Fatha’ Hines 


Astrud Gilberto, 
female singer 
Look To The Rainbow 
V/ V6-8643* 

The Shadow of Your 
Smile V/V6-8629* 


Bill Evans, piano 
Intermodulation 
V/ V6-B655 


With S) 


VI V6- 


imphony Orchestra 
640 


š 


Gil Evans, 
arranger 

The Individualism of 
Gil Evans V/ V6-8555 
Guitar Forms 

(w. Kenny Burrell) 
V/V6-8612 


Kai Winding, 
trombone 

Dirty Dog V/V6-8661 
The In Instrumentals 
V/V6-8639 


Oscar Peterson, 
piano 

Put on a Happy Face 
VI V6-8660"_ 

We Get Requests 
V/V6-8606* 


Go With Verve— 
That's The Ticket! 


Verve Records is a division ol 
 Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer Inc. 


*Also available on Ampex Таре 


and too little suspense to carry the sec 
ond half of a film that was sagging 1 
ily in the first half. One 
million is to make a movi 
Steal a Million. 


How to 


Seconds, the screen version. of David 
Elys novel, fantasizes the unhappy ad. 
aged 1 
се t0 disappea 
ч enation factory and emerge 
looking like Rock Hudson. As direcior 
John Frankenheimer sees it, it’s a fate 
full of sur ic trick photography 

а Wong Howe, 
ons capturing the mi 
the willful loss of identity 
Hudson is only too con E as a con- 
fused man manufactured by plastic sur 
most apt casting of his 
ity of the character 


and du. 
al home 
1 daugh. 
nd the desperate 
he has ever 
or ever gave him 
he gets his chance 
ght from 

er 
(b his new name (An s Wil 
son), however handsome and muscular 
the new husk, the timid soul of thc 
ban pped inside. Our quon- 
dam banker find the 
clutches of a 
the Ше out of him more certainly and 
efficiently than society ever could 
There are moments of humor, love 
laughter in Seconds. T 


м E 
everybody dancing naked in 
of freshly harvested grapes. 
Salome Jens as the beautiful 
lonely. special woman our hero had 
s hoped to meet. The awful flaw that 
ins the joy from these elements is the 
that nothing is ever 
what it first to be, thus imposing 
a tonc of dread on all proceedings. 
Which is precisely, we guess, what John 
pkenheimer intended. 


RECORDINGS 


Another gem from The G 
Charles / Together Again (АВС 
Ray, with the Jack Halloran 
The Raclets, turns his p 
сайыс a 
countrys 


xed bag of 


western (four tunes by Buck 
Owens) d-blues and swingova, 
Charles’ 


on on the 
bossa nova y 
unique delivery is 


delight. 
‘There are а number of remarkable 
things about Introducing Erie Kloss (Pres. 


More than just a change of pace 
from beer. Significantly more. 


Country Club Malt Liquor starts where 
beer leaves off. And keeps on going. The 
wonder is how any drink can look so light, 
yet taste sospirited. Try a couple six-packs, 
and see if you don't develop a 

crush on Country Club. 


PLAYBOY 


32 


ена PERFUMES conp. 1553 


PERFUME - COLOGNE - SPRAY COLOGNE 
LIPSTICK + DUSTING POWDER - SOAP 


tige). One, Eric Kloss is 16: two, he is 
blind: and three, his tenor and alto sax 
work rev 


a genuine jazz talent un 
encumbered by either his lack of years or 
his lack of sight. Kloss, in a quartet fea 
turing organist Don Pauerson, takes 
extended solos throughout the half-dozen 
pieces on hand and displays an individu 
ality that presages a bright. future. 

Don't Go to Strangers / Eydie Gormé (Со 
lumbia) covers (he musical spectrum 
with the vibrant. vocalist warbli 
way through a wide variety of tunelul 
topics. The arrangements (with the excep 
tion of the tide tune, which was charted 
and conducted by Marty Manning) are 
by Don Costa and are right úp Eydies 
alley. "There's Irving Berlin's How About 
Me, Alec Wilders haunting PH Be 
fround and Lemer and Lanes What 
Did 1 Have that 1 Don't Have? from On 
a Clear Day You Can See Forever, among 
others—all of which profit from the 
Gormé touch 


A couple of guitar stalwarts have come 
our way with LPs that admirably display 
their wares. My Guitar / George Van Eps 
(Capitol) is that estimable gentleman's 
first feature album in almost а decule— 
1 shameful recording hiatus, to be sure 
With only percussionist Frank Flynn lor 
company, Van Eps proves he is in total 

instrument 


ad of his scvenestrir 


comi 
The session—replete with Top 40 tunes 
md such splendid. standards as There 
Will Never Be Another You and Гт 
Glad There Is You—is handled. with 
creativity and flawless taste. The Fentestie 
Guiter of Barney Kessel / On Fire (Emerald) 
was recorded live at P. J's by the many 
time poll winner. Abetted by Jerry Schell 
on bass amd drummer Frankie Capp 
Barney is the very model of versatility — 
driving on such uptempo items as Just 
in Time, Recado Bossa Nowa and One 
Mint Julep, aud tenderly treating ballads 
of the Who Can 1 Turn To and The 
Shadow of Your Smile ilk, 


Today / Herbie Mann (Atlantic) finds the 
eminent Hutist touching all jazz bases. 
There are iwo Ellington. antiquities. 
The Mooch and The Creole. Love Call, 
iwo Beatle tone poems, Yesterday and 
The Night Before, the title ume (which 
ther by Herbie and 


is an original put t 
Oliver Nebon, who did the carting 
ind conducting for ihe LP) a 
а bosst-nova beauty. Ман 


nd Arrastao 
ménage in- 
cludes, in addition to vibist Dave Pike 
and percussion, a brace of bone men 
Jack. Hitchcock and Joseph. Orange. An- 
other hit lor Herbie. 


The Impossible Dream / Jack Jones (Карр) 
takes its title from the moving tune out 
of the hit musical Man of La Mancha, 
which Jack docs very right by. He also 


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Curtain time: 8 p.m. Seats: Fifth row 


center. Dress: Traditional, of course. 
A first nighter. A night for your 
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SERO OF NEW HAVEN » New Haven, Conn. 


flawlessly handles a spate of movie mel 
odies, My Best Girl from Mame and a 
pop and standard miscellany that includes 
What Now My Love and АИ or Nothing 
at All 


The Baroque Oboe / Harold Gomberg (Co: 
lumbia) has the young Japanese conduc 
tor Seiji Ozawa (On the Scene, PLAYBOY 
May 1964) leading ihe Columbia Cham. 
ber Orchestra, in lelicitous. conjunction 
with the Gomberg Baroque Ensemble 
The oboist’s tone is а thing of beauty 
as it soars serenely through works by 
Telemann, Vivaldi and Handel, in a re 
cording that is additionally enhanced by 
the playing of gifted harpsichordist Igor 
Kipnis. Gomberg's talents extend into 
the album cover bears a 


other arcas; 
reproduction of one of his paintin 

A pair of wellbaked soul biscuits are 
on tap—freddie McCoy / Spider Man (Pres 
Lige) and “Gotta Travel On" / Ray Bryant Trio 
(Cadet), On the former, funky vibist 
McCoy leads his foursome through а half 
dozen lengthy explorations of. jazz basics, 
dividing his time between such classics as 
Yesterdays, The Girl from Ipanema and 
That’s All, and spur-pl-the moment musi 
cales such as the title tune. The Bryant 
Trio, sparked by Ray's piano, is not 
alone on this outing; nearly half the 
opuses find the threesome augmented 
by brass men Clark Terry and Snookie 
Young, both of whom are in perfect 
agreement with the Bryant boys on the 
soul sound. Firstrate funk. 


Sarah Vaughan / The New Scene (Mercury) 
is a dynamic demonstration of the fact 
that Sassy is very much on the contem- 
porary qui vive. The Divine Sarah is in 
her usual fine Геше as she brings One, 
Two, Three, Michelle, Call Me, What 
No tas into 
the Vaughan vernacular. The new Sarah 
is, happily, just as good listening as the 
old. 


My Love and simil; 


Big-band jazz at its best; that's Oliver 
Nelson Plays Michelle (Impulse!). Arranger, 
conducior and reed man Nelson has 
surrounded himself with topllight aides- 
de-camp—Phil Woods, Clark Terry, Joc 
Newman, Hank jones, et aland 
brought an exciting. pulsating sound 
to vinyl. The tunes range from rock 
"waollers through jazz originals to the 
vintage Borsehtflavored anthem Mead- 
owland. They are all given the full 
Nelson treatment. 


А reprise of a number of old favorites 
in а new setting 15 the shape of Lou Rawls 
tive! (Capitol). The fast-rising blues 
belter benefits from being recorded. in 
front of an audience; the electricity gen 
erated is of a somewhat higher voltage 
than before, On tap this session; ЈР 


adventure: 


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PLAYBOY 


h adventure in deep water 


Underwater exploration has become the top adventure of ourtime. 
To glide, with fish-like ease, 100 feet beneath the surface, gently 
Streaming air bubbles, forgetting danger in the contemplation of 
the underwater “hanging gardens of Babylon" — what could be 
and yet more hazardous! Pressure, de- 
compression, pausing at the necessary levels, keeping an eye 
on dive duration ..... every minute, every second is charged 


more exhilarating . 


with suspense. 


The chronograph is your underwater ‘co-pilot’, just as it is a 
co-pilot in the air, a referee in all timed sports. It is an instrument 
panel, conveniently ready on your wrist, making you master of 


Short time measurements. 


"Achronograph is awatchfitted with aningen- 
ious mechanism which, apart from telling the 
time of day, allows continuous or intermittent 
time recording, accurate to 1/5th of a second 
and lasting from a few seconds to 12 hours. 


Please send me the brochure "The Swiss 
Watch Industry's answer to the measure- 
ment of short lime intervals” 


Surname 
Christian name Age 


Profession 
Address. 


Town and district 


Centre des Chronographes et Compteurs c/o 
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Caspari Geneve 


Rather Drink. Muddy Water, Tobacco 
Road, Stormy Monday d Goin’ to 
Chicago Blues. "Nuff said. 


Rege Rock (World Pacific), performed 
by the. Folkswingers and f на 
har Rao on sitar, is à music 
of things to come. The Indi 
is beginning to make itself felt 
as of pop and jazz Here, the sitar is 
placed in the fore of a rocking guitar 
group housing such stellar jazzmen as 
Dennis Bu Howard Roberts and 
Herb Ellis. The tunes are rock-bound, 
but the flavor is exotic, especially on the 
Beatle ballad Norwegian Wood. 


Net King Cole ot the Sands (Са 


itol), a 
previously unreleased album recorded in 


1960 at the luxurious Las V oasis, 
supplies an ample slice of the late singer's 
multitudinous talents; his vocal apprcach 


10 the poignant ballad Miss Otis Regrets, 
to the romping Thou Swell and to the 
gutsy Joe Turners Blues is impeccable. 
and his piano work on the classic Where 
or When makes one wish he had done 
more instrumentally in his last years. АП 
in all, it’s а lovely something to remem 


ber Nat by. 


The Limbo Trio (Paci 


jan threesome t 
nova 


Jazz) is a Brazil 
is pushing the boss: 
to new avenues. The group has 
| the bossa nova's soft edges, giv 

intensity to the native 
have heretofore been neg 
mbo, incidentally, means good 
luck or success, and the Trio is certainly 
the e up of pianist An 
Godoy, bassist Luiz Chaves and drumm 
Rubinho, it swings through a session 
spotlighting the ns of Luiz 
Воші, Antonio € a and other 
renowned. cariocas, 


Cookin’ the Blues/ James Moody (Argo) 
finds the consummate reed man, now a 
featured fixture in the Dizzy Gillespie 

zation, fronting his own group оп 
LP recorded in 1961 but just now 
released. Moody displays his fine tenor, 
alto and flute wares throughout a ste 
session that encompasses a pair of Eddie 
Jellerson vocals Disappointed and Sister 
Sadie. Adding to the swinging sound and 
fury are trumpeter Howard MeGhee, 
baritone sax man Musa Kalleem, trom 
bonis Bernard Mc y amd a hard- 
driving rhyuim section. 


Carol Ventura / | love to Sing (Prestige), 
the young chirper’s second LP, shows a 
voc urity that belies her fledgling 
status; her choice of tunes, for one thing 
is offbeat enough to indicate confidence 
in her ability to get them across without 
benefit of nosta There are а few 
familiar musical faces in the crowd 


Welcome Scotch The World Over! 


DEWARS 
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Dewar's Highlander 
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Rome's Colosseum 


SET OF 4 COLOR PRINTS OF CLANS MacLaine, MacLeod, Wallace and Highlander. in authentic full dress regalia, 9%" x 12”, suitable for framing. Available only 
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One gilt begins 


where others leave off 


PLAYBOY 


for CHRISTMAS 


MAKE HIS CHRISTMAS PRESENT PERFECT, make 
every month a reason to celebrate. Give PLAYBOY. 
It's young and lusty, yet as traditional as tinsel and 
trees. It's a glittering yuletide package, a carnival of 
color, that opens each month to the best in enter- 
tainment for men: fine fiction, nonfiction; food and 
drink in the gourmet manner; thought and opinion 
in depth; humor from the masters of mirth; fashion, 
travel and entertainment that's bold and bracing. 


BEAUTIES BY THE DOZEN, fresh and lush, warm as 
mulled wine, unfold in full color throughout the year 
to delight every man. What better exomple than 
PLAYBOY's 1964 Playmate of the Year, Donna 
Michelle, shown at the left. Add beautiful bewitch- 
ery world wide and you have the merry message. 


ALLISON COMES CALLING. 
PLAYBOY's pleasurable Play- 
mate of the current year, Alli- 
son Parks, announces your 
gift via the handsome card 
you see here. And it's signed 
as you direct. Rather do it 
yourself? We'll send it on to 
you for your presentation. 


WRAPPED WITH TASTE. Your gift begins with the 
lavish $1.25 January issue set to arrive at tree- 
trimming time—and keeps on giving until December 
steals the scene (also $1.25). Here's a preview of 
pleasure awaiting your friends, bosses, brothers and 
your favorite barmates: 


ËB pictorial takeouts on today's loveliest lasses 

Bl wise ways to riches by J. Paul Getty 

ËB critical self-portraits drawn from the famous and 
the infamous in sensitive interviews 

Bl cartoonery from the pens of Silverstein, Gahan 
Wilson, Erich Sokol; more misadventures of Little 
Annie Fanny 

Bi literary giants, writers like Henry Miller, John 
Le Carre, Vladimir Nabokov, James Baldwin, 
Kenneth Tynan, to name just a few. 


TAKE A MAIL APPROACH TO CHRISTMAS. Ease up. 
leave the crushing rush to others. Use this handy 
envelope to order gifts of PLAYBOY now. SAVE 
MONEY, too. Special low HOLIDAY GIFT RATES: 
$8 for your first 1-year gift (save $2.00 over news- 
stand price). Only $6 for each additional 1-year 
gift (save a full $4.00). And we'll defer payment 
until after January 1, if you wish. 


Say PLAYBOY? 919 North Michigan Ave., Chicago, Nl. 606) MY NAME — 
взи pi 
h d Send tor ойгым, 
the wor x 
PLAYEOY se (emer C EE c» 
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A. a. 
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Another fine product of of Kayser-Roth 


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among them, Anything Goes and. Wait 
Till You Scc Him—but the bulk of the 
material has to rely solely on the Ventura 
delivery. Happily, her ungimmicked ap 
proach to matters of note conquers all. 

Johnny Hodges—Foil "Fatho" Hines / Stride 
Right (Verve) brings two of jazzlom's 


most irrepressible “elder statesmen 10 
gether im a musical summit meeting of 
ma cent dimensions, H the Rabbit and 


the Fatha have never adapted the avant- 
garde colorations ol today's new sounds, 
they abo have never been out of the 
mainstream; their inventions have а time- 
less air about (hem. Here, with only 
rhythm section to 


music lovers of the world! 
Return / P. D. Q. Boch ot Cornegie 
(Vanguard) delily punctures the 
mposiries to which serious music is oc- 
ly prone, Professor Peter Schickcle 
is delightlully deadpan as he introduces 
the pieces by the recently (unfortunately?) 
ed member of the Bach clan. The 
n oratorio, The Season- 
ings, featuring The Okay Chorale and 
highligined by the ducts “Bide th 
thyme” and "Summer is а cumin seed’ 
the Unbegun Symphony, which contains 
only the third and fourth movements; 
and Pervertimeuto Jor Bagpipes. Bicycle 
and Balloons. The Royal P. D. Q. Bach 
Festival Orchestra is under Jorge Мемет 
and under the weather, obviously. This 
recording, we have no doubt, is the ini- 
tial step in establishing а body of music 
for the tone deaf. 


ши 
concert includes 


DINING-DRINKING 


"There is a touch of elegance that rings 
truc when it is genuinely gracious and 
not merely ostentatiously expensive. 
tham's The Ground Floor (51 West 
ad Street) is genuinely elegant. Lo- 
cuted, logically enough, on the ground 
floor of the new CBS building (Mrs. 
Paley is said (o have thought up the 
name), it successhully merges contempo- 
rary American decor with à. European 
approach (0 cuisine, The late Eero Saari 
nen, who designed the whole building, 
used stark contrasts throughout, and the 
restaurant is no exception, Black walls, 
тей banquettes, antique lights in moder 
rellectors—all add up to an unusual 
sense of intimacy in a very large restau- 
lant The service and food, under dhe 
direction of Fd Uibye, are both excel- 
lent. The menu is imaginative and 
fulfills its promise. Typical of the hors 
d'oeuvres are Hot Beel Marrow en 
che Périgord. and the especially suc 
c«ulent Norwegian Lobsters, Langous- 


nes, Grillés Bourguignonne. The Green 
Turtle Soup Amontillado is peppery. 
but the Cream of Pheasant is as good 
a hunters soup as there is around. 
The Turbo. served Poche, is, of course, 
flown in from England. Standards, such 
as tournedos, are superior, as arc the 
ne dishes. The selection is wider than 
usual for a restaurant of this quality. No 
surprise, though, is the dessert list—the 
Chocolate Mousse is done as a loaf, and 
the Marzipan Apple Pie is also unusual. 
The wine cellar is equal to the menu. 
Open for lunch and dinner, from noon 
10 midnight: Saturday, dinner only; 
closed Sunday. Reservations аге advis- 
able, since the clientele is grow 


Having been desi 
right, light decorative 
Brown's Ale & Chop House, 
New York's Pan Amer 
Ғам 451l Street, manages to suggest the 
or of an elegant English pub without 
looking like a Hollywood movie set. The 
illusion is completed by a Rule Britannia 
menu. ale by the tankard or the yard and 
good alehouse service. The name, from 
an old London tavern near a railroad 
station, ties in with the fact that the Pan 
Am building is built atop Grand Central 
Station. Charlie Brown's gleaming open 
kitchen looks out on the spacious dining, 
room. From this kitchen, extraordi 
adroit chefs, under the direc 
ager James Morrison. turn out such 
i» Crocked Herr d Pickled Onions, 
Mussels in Curry Cream and Baked 
Clams with Gammon and Herbs for ap- 
petizers. There's an excellent Mulliga 
tawny and Cocka-Lecekie from the soup 
pois. Among the main courses, the Roast 
Rib of Beel, served with Horseradish 
Cream, is, И we may coin 
beef! Charlie Brownt” 
ney Pie and Mutton Chop with Kidney 
are equally savory. The ine Dover 
5ole—llown in from abroad—is just that 
and is served with a choice of sauces 
Deserts, including Apple Trifle and 
Gooseberry Fool, are flavorsomely Fal- 
stries are all made on the 
premises. The ales are imported by the 
keg, as they should be, To keep thin 
in proper Sceptered. Isle spirit, we sug 
st a glass of port or madeira asa cuisine 
Charlie Brown's is open for 
lunch [rom 12 to 3, for dinner from 5 to 
19:30 an, except Sunday. An after- 
theater supper is served. 


ed with just the 
touch, Chorlie 
1 the lobby of 

Building on 


m, 


Where can you find a Mont Blanc 
market in Chinatown run by an Italian 
In San Francisco, where the most in- 
triguing restaurant of the moment is 
an apartment. build op Nob Hill, 
operated by realestate men and arc 
tects. The ma is George Humphrey, 
who may still spend his days figuring 20 
years at 634. percent but whose evening 


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work shows him to have а nifty touch 
with Continental cuisine. Few persons 
know of the restaurant and even fewer 
know of it by s пате, Parloir d'Eiffel 
(Clay and Jones Streets). It has à marked 
ly stylish interior of Barbary Coast red 
velvet with prints from the days when 
Fanny was а girl's name, and is in the 
first-floor corner of a tall. gleaming-white 
structure called the "Clay Jones." The 
coterie so far seems to be the true names 
in San Francisco social life and those 
executives who can read a wine list. The 
menu is basically American. chophousc. 
prepared. with magnificent sauces. and 
given French names—entrecóte. tourne- 
dos aux champignons, or something 
houquetiére. The dishes are above рат 
lor this city’s fine restaurants. and 


so 


is the wine list. A boule of Cháte 
Lafite-Rotly 1. Haut Brion or Cha 
teau М их of a good vintage can 


add $16 to your bill. The group who 
created the restaurant three years ago 
has never bothered 10 seek customers. 
for reasons that may be tied up with tax 
breaks or a desire to know everyone at 
the next table, but you will not be 
unwelcome. The bar is a dark, wood 
paneled affair where а man may talk to 
а woman as if she were the only girl in 
the world, 

dining room is open from 5 т.м. 

midnight daily, and about its wall 
plaques from decorating titans testify 
10 its design excellence. Dinner is served. 
seven days a week, from 6 until 10 т.м 


secluded adjunct to the 
until 


ACTS AND 
ENTERTAINMENTS 


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Cheetah offers three hyperkinetic floors, 
one of which has 8000 square feet de- 
signed for gyration. The place is one 
large, colorlu exciting hot tin 
roof, in which cats from an isolated gen 
ion make the scene 


constant 
orgy of expanded consciousness. They 
are aided and арепей by a decor designed 
by Dr. The whole thing seems 
10 move, and indeed it docs; the singers 
and musi ndulue, the dancers 
reflect the musicians, at least athletically, 
and the маде is а huge sonic launching 
The whole ritual is accentuated by 
ing system that is directly geared 
to the sound. Each note on the scale ac 
tates a different set of lights, which 
means that if you're di 


Í or deafened by 
so high that 
it almost transcends hearing). vou can 
dance to the lights. But the dance floor 


the din (the noise level i 


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Guess again, friend, You know what 
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X Race mustangs, And, in a more intellectual vein, challenge longhairs Ü | d the world's finest Mod bathroom 

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т = While wa 


ig for your coat, y 
1 watch Scopitone. Upstairs, on 1 
third floor, is the movie room, where un- 
derground films are shown Since it is 
decidedly gauche to participate in Chec- 
activities in clothing ordinare, 
is boutique at the entrance. 
зу purchase properly styled 
clothes, or threads. Properly styled, ol 
course. is Mod. Currently. only soft 
drinks are served, since the atmosphere 
is heady enough. Snacks, mostly hot 
ane à da Gurte—served from he 
that is. Cheetah, which starts its 
ns at 0:30 м. and runs until 4 
arges а mere $3 starting fee on 
weekdays. 51 on weekends, Open е 
night, including Sunday. 


“SPORTSWEAR 


In Black, White a 
Scarlet, Surf Blue, BOOKS 
Surf Yellow, Surf ` 
EN AERA Norman Mailer's public 
Ne Beta Mae May f 4 he describes them, some 
EE e Da CES. : the adventurous intelligence at the core 
aod offer fing stores. Or wile : á of the m k. He is also one of и 
FORUM, 303 Fifth Ave., N. Y. А mox c "ig ol contempora 
crs in that his chronic come 
powered by shrewd hu 


for the most vulne 
sonal and national styles, and the s 
grace of occasional self-mockery. These 
п Cannibals and 

of his writ 
nix Front 1960 io di présent, stitched 
together with an italicized 
(second and third thoughts aft 
publication). Featured here is his skew 
m he Republican convention that 
along with un 
nalyses of J. F. K 
L.B. J. There are also dissections 
ob this Administration's journey into 
the quicksinds of Vietnam, includim 
blowtorch response 10 a moderate ami 
Adminisnation statement by а s 
of Partian Review intellectuals. The 
nonpelitical sections include stinging yet 
s assessments ol contemporary 
American 


of 
nominated Goldwate 
commonly provocativ 


celis as well as insights 


imo Mailers long obsession. with Ше 
novel “the Bitch in one’s 

lizing and fiercely 
he ranges over 
„ the nature of b. 
sophical and esc 
some of them r 
opaque. He ends with an ceric 


ment of a prospective The Last 
Night, which deals w nothing less 
Most Magy E John than the end of the earth. The collec 


42 tion falters only when strings of what 


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everything 

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second 

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People will look at you... because 
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these anywhere else. We developed 
a special fabric, designed some 
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named them Tempest (just to let you 
know they live through any kind of 
storm). Things like wind, rain and cold 
— even creases — will have to find 
other people to bother when you 
wear a Tempest. So be worry-free. 
Get one or two for yourself and let the 
weatherman worry about the weath- 
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Lets face it, Winchester's 
early fame with “the gun that 
won the West" does have one 
drawback. 

It sort of gives second billing 
to our great new Winchesters. 

Take our 1400 automatic [for 
skeet, trap, or field]. 

Here's a shotgun that has 
the world's strongest locking 
system— which is safer, stands 
four times normal shotgun 


breech pressures, and adds 
we don't know how many 
more years of life to the action. 
It develops less recoil than 
any other shotgun. 
[No more flinching in the 
clutchesonthose second shots.) 
Its gas-operated action uses 
2%” magnum and standard 
loads without an adjustment. 
Barrels are interchangeable. 
[Switch 'em back and forth. 


The gun that 


Use the same gun for deer or 
pheasants or ducks or trap or 
skeet or what have you.] 

Its ventilated rib floats. And 
can't be warped out of line by 
the heat of the barrel. 

Its walnut stock has a finish 
that’s almost indestructible. 

{How else could it’ve passed 
the fiendish jungle test we'd 
devised for it?] 

And we could go on. 


The point is, the 1400 is as 
great a рип today as the old 
Winchesters were in their day. 

And has, in fact, already won 
over thousands of shooters in 
both hemispheres — Eastern 
and Western. 

So we could call it *the gun 
that won the East and West". 

But we can't. 

We've already used up one 
of those directions. 


| won the East. 


WINCHESTER: 


PLAYBOY 


m4 


really turn me on! 


ETE EE 


Mailer chooses to consider poems occa- 
sionally pop up like tiny, damp fire- 
crackers. Most of the time, however, 
Cannibals and Christians seizes our at- 
tention with the passion of its autho e e 
criving for noncancerous life and with 
vd pague ЕТП Iryit just before 
iridescence of the malignant and cancer 

cells are bizarre bur beautiful under a ы ° 

шо кулк Like аа е curtain time 
center in the night”). The verdict on ° 
Mailer as а novelist awaits new works, 
But as an essayist, he is already close to 
the top of the current class 


"The latest chronicle of life with J. F. K 
is With Kennedy (Doubleday), by former 
White House press secretary Pierre Sal 
inger, a bouillabaise containing two 
main ingredients: a detailed description 
of J. F. K.S welllubricated press oper 
tions amd a categoric defense of every 
gambit the Kennedy Administration 
played in its skirmishes with the news 
media. With a more skillful chef, the 
recipe might have worked: in Salinger's 
hands, the dish is thoroughly unsatisly. 
ing. Worse for the patron, the cook has 
thrown in the kitchen sink—an extended 
account o[ how he got his job and a Hennessy and Soda 
Backstairs Annie recital of White House 
decor and personnel, replete with non 80 Proof Hennessy Cognac Brandy - Sci 
revealing detail. The s us stull of With (In chic half pints, too.) 
Kennedy lies in Salinger's endorsement 
of the Government's right to conduct 
foreign policy without the knowledge, 
and therefore without the opportunity 
for consent oir dissent, of dic vocis. Ie 
blows a kiss to the right of newsmen to 
have access to information. but steadily 
chips away at this policy as it is tested 
against such events as the secret training 
of guerrillas for an invasion of Cuba and 
the build-up of American Armed Forces 

Vietnam five years ago. Salinger re- 
eats clumsily what others have invoked 
nesse—a claim that national secu 
y justifies all. These premises lead 
inexperienced pressman Salinger to pass 
judgment om gutsy reporters such as 
David Halberstam of The New York 
Times and to suggest that newsmen 
should function as an arm of military 
lligence. The end result is a book de: 
with a very complicated subject, 
written by an uncomplicated press agent 


Теп & Co., М.Ү. 


In his first novel, The Secret of Santa 
Vittoria (Simon & Schuster), Robert Crich- 
ton reaps a rich harvest with the story of 
an Italian hill town's communal effort to 
keep its wine from the Germans during 
World War Two. This is an old 
fashioned entertainment, with а simple 
plot, a beginning, a middle and an end, 
and a cask of memorable characters. It's 
enough to make a De Sica want to sit up 

uel sip. And that’s one Maw. "There are 
instances when the author seems ct- 
cd by the bouquet of Hollywood or 
Cinecitta, as in certain of his love scenes 


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that are late-vintage Hemingway—that is 
to say, mawkish. One other weakness is 
the continuous flow of cpigrams and 
aphorisms, as at Khrushchev 
ant, were the narrator. (“The carly 
sun is gold in the mouth , . ." "Yes, the 
a thief”) Bur some of them cut 
ans 


they are doing something bad, but when 
the Germans do something bad they arc 
able to convince themselves they have 
ne something good." The novel 
ich starts cut as a comedy told by an 
American flyer who parachutes into San 


кА behind them. 
tain Von Prum comes to Santa Vittoria 
to win a “bloodless victory,” to make the 
Italians turn over their supply of w 
to him and learn to love him at the same 
time. But when he loses, he reverts to 
the cruelty that is the essence of his 
ture. The novel turns on the confror 
tion between Von Prum and Bombolini, 
the town clown. Bombolini’s patron 
saint is Machiavelli (he 
Prince 43 times); Von Prum is, naturally. 
Nieusche. Von Prum finds comfort in 
Nietzsche's line that in the long haul ol 
history one life is worth nothing; to 
which Bombolini answers, “Then that's 
the difference between us. To us nothing 
is worth one life." Score oue for Machia 
velli over Nietzsche. And score one for 
Robert Criditon. 


One thing you have to say for The 
Masculine Mystique by Robert Lipsyte (New 
Library) and The American Mele 
non (Coward: McCann) — 
Чу written. In the Lip. 

е case it doesn't matter, for the whole 
venture is such a sorry one that the few- 
er people who are enticed into readi 
it, the better off we'll all be. But Br 
s so obviously warmhearted, intelli- 
gent and grown-up that it isa pity he let 
himself be persuaded that. simple state- 
ments of fact are of little account u 
they ave first translated. into the j: 
of the pseudo scienti: 
would profit from reading the Brenton 
book will, if he is m 
put it aside before complet 


ıt, in terms of 
the contemporary 


tables as "More. impo 
his psychological st 
male is trapped between iwo utterly 
conflicting m (10 you give yourself 
ten cents eve 

phrase "in terms o 
with about $15. ge 
that women are not mystical, not other 
worldly, not made of gossamer stulf. not 
weaker vessels, not quicksilver, not all 
emotions and intuition, not whited 
sepulchers nor beasts of prey, but mere 
ly, God help them, people, very much 


like our very own selves. While this 
wholesome bit of truth could. probably 
have been demonstrated without rescarch- 
ing it up to its cycbrows, the author 
has dutifully Jarded his every prop- 


and even a New York bar- 
tender, who says that today's citizens just 
drink to show that they are as manly as 
their fathers, and who, for all one can 
tell, docs not know a damn thing about 
it. But when Brenton tires of telling us 
what others think. and sets down in co 
cise language what he thinks himself, his 
book is satisfying to the soul. He takes 
apart the myths of Momism and the 
Feminization of Society, And he even 
acknowledges, as some social critics do 
not, that poor people have sex problems, 
100. In short, he demonstrates effectively 
that one ounce of insight is worth à 
whole bucketful of “research.” As for 
Robert Lipsyte, he should never have 
listened to the tin-eared editor who told 
him his book was funny. It reads like a 
manuscript designed for College Humor 
30 years ago. The geme relied. almost 
solely on the invention of "crazy things" 
that were performed by the inhabitants 
of a "crazy world"—men who spit into 
the upturned plug hat of a visiting dig- 
nitary or who removed their cork legs in 
public. Lipsyte’s book, which, like Bre 
ton's, was designed to ride the backwash 
of the tide of feminine-mystique tomes, 
is solidly in dhe uadition, There the 
club lady who chews cigars and shouts 
"Thats cap!" there is the man who 
presses the wrong button and has "four 
TV dinners drop on his head." And you 
are invited to strangle with laughter at 
the college professor who wipes off the 
blackboard with the leather patches on 
the elbows of his jacket. 


Read almost any onc of the ten 
Dashiell Hammett short stories and novel 
ctes іп The Big Knockover (Random House) 
and plain as а bikini at а church 
picnic that this is where it all began— 
ihe modern, peculiarly American, tough- 
detective yarn. Read them all and it’s 
clear that we in on a revival of à mi 
nor master. These st were wriucn 
between 1921 and 1929, most of them 
Tor the legendary pulp Black Mask. But 
Hammett ages well, as anyone who has 
sen the emarkably Га movie 
based on The Maltese Falcon must 
know. The bitten dialog snaps like 
a whip, the plots reverse their field like 
at backfield full of Fran Tarkingtons, and 
а low-keyed humor with a brooding. 
ıl intelligence plays over all. To be 
perfectly accurate (and Hammen is a 
stickler for acc only nine of these 
les are detective stories. They focus on 
the gu ing activities of Hammetts 
паше1сзз ero, ап operative in 
the San Francisco branch. of the Cor 
tinental Detective Agency. He is a 


ey 


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(Would you believe 


1000009) And who 
invented it? 


(Turn page for answer) 


Mavest makes 
utzier Sporteoats 


‘for the man who wants his clothes all man Sand his woman, woman. 


1290 Avenue of the Americas, 
Rockefeller Center, New York. 


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subtly shaped at waist, $45. At your kind of store. 


47 


48 


PLAYBOY 


"This Bacardi Party š 


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RIPPED FROM 
PLAYBOY. APRIL 1959 


(Continued from previous page) 


t i 
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chunky, shrewd and workLweary man of 
about 40 who has been sleuthing long 
enough to have seen his fill of the mag 
goty side of life. The op is drawn from 
Hammett’s own experience as a private 
eye. There is a true grittiness about this 
man who can єп tuation in 
а young operative who has been 
ng ball with a gang will be killed 
rather than have the truth leak and thc 
agency given a black eye—and the op 
liked him, too. So here's where Ray 
mond Chandler got it from, and Ross 
Macdonald, too, to name the two best of 
Hammetts literary descendants. Ham 
metr's friend Lillian. Hellman has done 
proud in selecting and editing the 
ries in this book, and she has writ 
а touching introduction setting out their 
tionship over many y he tenth 
piece, an unfinished novel called Tulip. 
is not a detective story. It is the most di 
realy personal thing Hammett ever 
wrotc—the story of a writer in his laic 
50s, just released from jail (Hammett 
went to jail during the McCarthy era for 
refusing to name names), who is visited 
by an old Army buddy named Tulip. 
who wants the story of his life writen 
Here Hammett sets down some of his 
theories of writing, and of life, and it is 
а pity he did not live to finish the novel 
As Miss Hellman notes, Tulip gives 
every appearance of a whole new literary 

er. Most writers would have settled. 
with honor, for just the one. 


p 


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“A painting has no intrinsic value. lı 
is a luxury commodity for which a m: 

t is delibe created. and m 
tained by financially interested. parties 
who are neither more nor less noble 
than the operators of any other legal 
sort of market" With this deflating 
süucment Robert Wraight, English 
journalist and art critic, introduces his 
book The Ап Geme (Simon & Schuster). 
Wraight takes sour delight in exposing 
the hinations of art dealers, auction. 
cers, collectors, forgers and. critics—all 
the players who make up the “art game." 
His sympathies lie with the artist; he 
complains that "good" and 
ings no longer exist, onh 
what doesn't sell. "But," he asks, "what 
of today’s painting and who of today's 
painters will still be prized in ıl 
art game during the next few decades; 
And he proceeds to make like a stock- 
broker and offer opinions as to which 
painters’ works lik up in 
value. The list is long and is categorized 
for the following buyers: the rich, the 
well off, the comfortably off. those mak 
ing ends meet and the hard up. Persons 
in the last group can still buy from a lis 
of painters whose works can be had for 
under $140. "What the investor of small 


should look for now. nsels 

ight, “are such Old Mast wings 
(if any) as he can afford; drawings by 
those 19th Century artists whose paint 


ings are finding new favor: drawings 
by —” But by now your interest (and 
ly greed) has been piqued and you 
primed to join in and make a killing. 
inst, though, pick up The Art Game; it 
describes the people who are anxious to 
play with you. 


WHAM! POW! DROOL! Two art 
forms, the comic strip and the female 
1de—one only half a century old, the 
other an hour older than human history 
—come together with a 
Barbarella (Grove), lushly 
liquidly drawn by French painter Jean- 
Claude Forest. Delighted at the lust that 
lurks in the hearts of men, able to leap 
> bed 
fragile nymph transformed by a single 
SHAZAM of lightning imo invincible 
nudity, Barbarella wanders the stars, 
arting evil and rewarding good—and, 
10 learn how the creatures of outer 
press their affections,” discovers 
nothing new beyond the 
Her weapons are a full bosom, 
voluptuous hips and alluring arms, 

ich, when carelessly approached, ¢ 
fold any male within their reach. Guard- 

ag her destiny is a deus ex vagina. After 

a lorced landing on Lythion, a kind of 
Edenand-Gomorrah in the orgone box 
of space, our damsel in undress contends 
with air sharks and instant petrification, 
sleeps with a blind angel and a lovemi 
ng robot, is mounted by an “excessive 
pleasure machine” and caresed by a 
One-eyed Lesbian queen who sports а 
single rose in her crotch. Good triumphs 
over evil—which is o say that Barbarella 
is made to feel good. But not before 
men and monsters, wind and water- 
alls. gravity itself, all of nature, in its 
ceaseless evolution toward perfection, 
conspire to remove her skinclutching 
clothing, In his blend of sensuous science 
ficiion and witty mythology, luminous 
hallucination and perverse melodrama, 
Forest has achieved a mutation of the 
he has created in Barbarcl- 
la the very apoptheosis of стон 
Roger Vadim, Terry Southern and | 
Fonda have already signed tor the movie 
ver ets and lighting by LSD. Cos- 
tumes by RIP! SLASH! WHOOPS! 


The publishers of Michael Scriven's 
Primary Philosophy (McGraw Hill) believe 
they may have another Marshall McLu- 
han on their hands; that is, a writer who 
can take hold of the problems of the day 
with both and sometimes with 
three large feet, like some strange tem- 
ple idol. But where McLuhan is allusiv 
circular, mysterious in his ways 10 men, 
md Understanding Media sometimes 
seems like а black light bulb darkening 
the day, Scriven, a young professor of 
logic and the philosophy of science, pro- 
ceeds with no-nonsense clarity toward 
reasonable responses to such stimuli as: 
"The Immature Immoralist "Legal 


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49 


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Responsibi "Is Unselfish Behavior 
Possiblez" "Rational Versus Right" 
“The Art Critic and the Automobile 
Salesman," "Man Versus God," "Acqui 


ing Responsibility," "Moral Compro- 
mise"—these and many other matters 
cooked ov many a bull session. And 
matters undreamed of in run-of-the-mind 
bull sessions, At times, Seriven sports a 
bit lengthily astride some of his favorite 
broncos. For cxample, he believes there 
is no God (and No God is His name), but 
he goes through the history of the argu- 
ment with such unrelenting completeness 
(A. The Cosmological Argument: B. The 
me Mover Argument; C. The Teleo- 
al Argument; and so on to M., and 
starts over again from another 
ww) that the reader is likely to 
ically, “Азан awready. 
So there's no God." But Scriven can re- 
ply that some encyclopedia of answers to 
this persistent question is necessary, and 
this one will certainly do very well. To 
other matters, such as the comple 
of decision my 
Commitnent to causes, the ambim 
of pleasure and happiness, he brings a 
finely toned and unabashed mind. He 
has taught at Indiana, Harvard and 
Berkeley, and has also evidently voyaged 
| the peculiar world outside the 
sities. If man is to be more than 
“a very complex machine or a very tal 
ted anima he must consider the 
auers to which Scriven addresses him. 
self. Not everything he says imposes it- 
sel as perlect truth. but the fine brisk 
confidence of his approach has the esti- 
mable faculty of causing thought in the 
reader. Which is a more important qual- 
ity. perhaps, than giving final answers. 
A hook to digest and share. 


po 


Hany Mark Petrakis is one of those 
modern Ameri ters who like the 
characters to go back where they ca 
from. Even if he sets his new novel 
Dream of Kings (McKay). in coniemporary 
Chicago, the spirit of the old country 
Is; the people have yet to take the 
plunge into the melting pot. In th 
case, the old country is Greece, and in 
the Hellenic tradition. a passionate m 
is pitted in classic conflict with the gods. 
Leonidas Matsoukas is an engaging а 
tion—rich as Greek pastry, stron 
Greek collec. Lusy Leonidas follows 
the fillies, frequents the gaming tables 
and likes his ойго. He ekes out a living 
through inspired counseling instructs a 


пс 


as 


Tl yyearold on how to recapture the pow- 
er of lovemaking and. deals masterlully 
with a 13.yearold boy encoun 
miracle of masturbation 
is caught in a vise. Although he is mar- 
Tied. he yearns for a chesty widow: al 
though he has two healthy daughters, his 
only son is a paralyzed bundle of incur 
able seizures. And so he dreams—like 

king, like a god: He will carry his ailing 
son to the healing sunlight of Greece; he 


4 down with the overripened wid 
ow. The logic of love cracks the chains 
that bind the widow to chastity, but 
Matsoukas comes to grief in his schemes 
to wrench his son from his fate. His god- 
like stance is reduced to mortal size and 
his proud spirit goes plummeting carth- 
ward: another victim of hubris bites the 
dust. A chapter from A Dream of King 
entitled The Gold of Troy, was pub- 
lished in prayñmov last month. pravnov 
contributor Petrakis, whose collection of 
short stories, Pericles on 31st Street, was 
nominated for last year's National Book 
Award. serves up a bittersweet literary 
dish. He writes with the lyric touch of 
the early Saroyan. His characters, like 
Malamud's. contain reservoirs of sidness 
into which still another drop of sullering 
must fall. 


As the Fat Man gigglingly pointed 
out, Humphrey Bogart was, indeed, a 
ter—sui generis. He was, at once, а 

shooter, a sentimentalist, а hip- 
al nonconformist, and an 
it came to dealing with 
m. [n an age of types, he 
was an individual, and that is doubtless 
the reason there пу hooks 
prim about him. Nine ye 
death, he is а veritable folk he 
ample of the kind of myth he | 
would have loved to prick (see "Here's 
Looking at You, Kid"—The Bogart 
Boom, rrsynov. June 1966). Bogie (New 
American Library), by former newspapei 
man and friend Joe Hyams, with an in 
troduction by Lauren Bacall, is what 
amounts 10 an official biography. It is 
written with respectful tact and with re- 
spect Гог facts, tracing Bogart from his 
New York Blue Book birth through his 
privte-school upbringing, his stints as a 


iges (four), drinking (hard) 
ing (phenomenal) careers, and finally his 
brave show of face when confronted with 


his own certain death from cancer. No 
md 


t could be dull. 


hiography of Во; 
this one is often moving. With 
st m of anecdotes, Hyams s 
the man behind the Bogie legend—but 
he never tries to analyze that man. “Just 
try to imagine him on a psychiatrist's 
ng the notion 
Bur the biographer—even if a loving 
friend — 
Bogart was, after all, as Alis 
has noted, “a very complex m 

bonom and afraid: to seem so." His 
code of image, of courage and 
style, like that of Hemingway. His moth- 
gway’s, seems to have 
riarchal force of 
ther, like Hem 
who destroyed 


couch,” he writes, dismi 


st be willing to do just that 


an, gentle 


wis onc 


з an awesome m 
artistic pretensions; his 
ingway’s. was а doctor 
himself. But Hyams never probes; like 
his hero, his approach is deadpan; but it 
looked better on Bogie. 


The Rolex Oyster Perpetual “Explorer” 


We invented this 


for the conquest of the 
highest mountains in the world - 


This one has a bit of bo 


The Gelden King’ from the Benvenuto Cellini collection 


We created this 


ڪڪ 


for the man who has conquerec 
Everests of his own 


th and 


a substantial character of its own. 


Like the ‘Explorer’ and the watches of the 
Cellini collection, the Rolex Oyster Per- 
petual ‘Day-date’ is not for every man. But 
its character may suit you. 

The ‘Day-date’ combines the rugged- 
ness of the ‘Explorer’ (the watch Sir John 
Hunt chose for his assault on Mt. Everest) 
with the undeniable elegance of the Ben- 
venuto Cellini collection (a limited edition 
of men's watches . . . inspired by the 


works of Benvenuto Cellini . . . very ex- 
pensive). And the 'Day-date' has distinc- 
tive features of its own. 

The Geneva-made Oyster case is hewn 
from a solid block of gold or platinum. 
The bracelet, also in solid gold or plati- 
num, is designed specially for the case. 
The movement has won the highest dis- 
tinction for precisionandqualitya Chrono- 
meter can normally obtain. 


A calendar shows the date and the day o: 
the week spelt out in full. 

The ‘Day-date’ is available only in golc 
or platinum and is quite possibly thc 
most brilliant timepiece in the world to 
day. Wear it and you can take it diving of 
Punta del Este, ski at St. Moritz oraddres: 
the United Nations. With a Rolex on уош 
wrist, you have entire worlds in your 


hands. {р 


When a man has a world in his hands, you expect to find a Rolex on his wrist ROLEX 


GENEVA 


‘Aden Auckland Bandung Bangkok Bombay Brussels Buenos Ares Colcgne буйт Havara Horg Mong Johannesburg London Madrid Melbourne Mexico City Milan New York Paris Sao Paulo Singapore Sydney Tokyo Тоюп 


PLAYBOY 


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THE PLAYBOY ADVISOR 


ММ: aye six students at a Midwestern 
university. During an early-morning bull 
sesion, we unanimously agreed that 
there has been a noticeable decrease in 
our sex urges since the semester began 
Rumor has it that the dining-hall kitch- 
en puts an additive (saltpeter) into the 
milk, which serves 10 de ¢ the male 
sex urge. Is this a possibility?—G. S. 
Milwaukee, Wisconsin: 

For centuries, — prisoners—criminal, 
military and educational—have 
pected that their food was being tam- 
pered with lo reduce their natural sexual 
appetite, bul there is no evidence of any 
such substance ever having been used in 
this manner; nor is there any scientif- 
ically established evidence that sall peter 
(potassium. nitrate) is even. capable of 
dulling sexual desire, as is commonly as- 
sumed. (See “Saltpeter and the Wolf” by 
William Zinsser, тїлүвоү, December 
1963.) 

In“ The Natural History of Nonsense," 
Dr. Bergen Evans vefutes the existence 
of aphrodisiacs, and then states: 

“Even more widespread is the belief 
that saltpeter is an antiaphradisiac and 
is secretly introduced into the food at 
colleges, prisons, and other places where 
amorous impulses are thought to have 
ungovernable force. It ts safe to say that 
there is not a boys’ school nor an Атту 
amp in the country in which this myth 
is not entrenchet 


sus- 


С: you supply me with a recipe for 
an exotic Halloween punch?—J. 
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. 

We suggest you serve up the jollowing 
witel’s brew, which serves 13: Into a pot 
or small caldron place 2 fifths very dry 
sherry, 20 whole allspice, 20 whole cloves, 
10 pieces cinnamon slick and 2 table- 
spoons prepared grated orange peel, and 
simmer (don't boil) for 10 minutes. Put a 
dozen eggs in mixing bowl and mix at 
high speed until thick and lemon colored; 
then slowly add 1 cups sugar while con. 
tinuing to mix. Pour sherry mixture into 
eggs while still mixing. Add 11 02s. co- 
gnac. Pour punch into punch bowl previ- 
ously rinsed in hot water to warm. Core 
3 warm baked apples, then cut them into 
eighths and add. Stir punch with ladle 
occasionally, as liquid bottom and foamy 
lop lend lo separate. Happy haunti 


WVesterday 1 passed a guy on the street 
who had a monocle screwed into one 
eye. I'm intrigued by the damn thing—it 
really gave him an Erich von Stroheim 
look. Can vou tell. me something about 
the history of the monocle? Where can I 
buy one?—A. C, Detroit, Michigan. 
The monocle, a refinement oJ the sim- 
ple reading glass, was developed around 


1800 to correct. anisometropia—distorted 
vision in one eye. During the Victorian 
era, the monocle became an aristocratic 
affectation, and in the 1930s, the mono 
cle acquired. sinister overlones when 
movie directors seemed to think that no 
German villain could be without onc. 
Although anisometropia is generally cor- 
rected with conventional eyeglasses these 
days, you can probably obtain a monocle 
from an optometrist if you suffer [rom 
this velatively raye defect: if you're тете 


ly looking to make cocktail-party chatier 
(or invite street fights), you can buy а 
fake monocle at a novelty store. 


ДА young medical school studeni, I am 
currently dating a charming young lady 
as a succesful interior decorator, 
carns a healthy income. I don't know if 
marriage is in the offing, but conceivably 
it might be. Here's the hang-up. She 
argues that I should allow her to foot 
our dating bills, but I feel funny abot 
letting her pick up the tab. Should 1 
stop being so squeamish, or continue to 
insist on dating within the limits of my 
own budget—s. A., Kansas City, Kansas. 
We don't think a guy is being unduly 
squeamish if his ego doesn't groove with 
the idea of his girl constantly picking up 
the tab, There's an infinity of exciting 
dating adventures open to a limited 
ct supplemented by an unlimited 
imagination—from atmospheric bistros 
to public beaches. from Saturday night at 
the movies to Sunday museum outings 
For occasions requiring a larger outlay of 
money than you can afford, let her buy 
the theater or concert tickets, while you 
take care of the other. details—dinner 
transportation, or whatever. 


who, 


Presse setle the following wager: A 
iend of mine claims. that Southern 
state once had a Negro governor. 1 say 
he's been out in the sun too long. Who 
winsz—H. H., San Francisco, Californi 

Your buddy. P. B. S. Pinchbach, а Ne- 
gio who had been elected lieutenant 
governor of Louisiana during the Recon 
struction period, became acting governor 
for one month following the impeach 
ment in 1872 of the incumbent chief 
executive. 


N. 2 pipe shop I visited recently, I no- 
tied а the wall (hat listed 
many different types of straight tobaceos 
that could be purchased for blending 
purposes. Can you tell me the difference 
between Virginia bright, Virginia bright 
pickings, Virginia plug cut, Virginia 
dark and Virginia sun-cured? Up to now, 
1 had always thought that there was only 
one type of Virginia tobacco. By the w 


chart on 


100 years 
behind 


KAYWOODIE 
® Inthe face of greatly increased 
demand for pipes, Kaywoodie 


simply refuses to compromise its 
quality. We will continue to use only 
rare, aged briar as we have since 1851. 
We will continue to insist on the 128 
separate, hand operations needed to 
bring out the best smoking qualities 
of our briar. Which is why your 
Kaywoodie always smokes mild and 
cool. Perhaps we are a hundred years 
behind the times. But any other way 
and it just wouldn't be Kaywoodie. 


Send 25¢ Jor 48-page catalog. Tells how to smoke a 
pipe; shows pipes from $6.95 to $3,500; Kaywoudie 
Tobacco, smoking items. Kaywoodie,N.Y. 22, Dept. D9 


53 


PLAYBOY 


м 


authentic 
18th century 
yard of ale 


West Virginia brand handcrafted crys- 
tal adds whoopee to after ski! But if 
you find cheer in things other than 
beer, see our gala hand-decorated 
barware, pitchers, Irish coffees . . . 
and hundreds of other items that mark 
you the savvy host. Ask for our Party 
Smarty pamphlet at your nearby de- 
partment or gift store. 


WEST VIRGINIA GLASS CO. 


WESTON, WEST VIRGINIA 


is Virginia tobacco grown only in that 
San Bernardino, Cali- 


The majority of Virginia tobaccos are 
grown m a handful of Southern states, 
including North Carolina, South Car- 
olina, Florida, Georgia and Virginia. 
Virginia bright is the best grade, as it's 
been fluecured inside special barns in 
which both heat and moisture are care- 
fully controlled. Virginia bright pickings 
is similar to Virginia bright except that 
several flue-cured leaves are pressed. to- 


gether, thus forming a "cake" that, after 
being coarsely cul, smokes slow and 
sweet. Virginia plug rut is abo flne- 


cured, but the Cul is even coarser and 
the taste is mellow and very rich. Vir- 
ginia dark (generally used for эпи] and 
Chewing-tobacca purposes) is fire-cured, 
having been exposed to an open. fix 
Virginia sun-cured tobacco is grown al- 
most exclusively near Richmond, Vir- 
ginia, Today, most “sun-cured” lobaccos 
are actually cured. in barns, 


Bam a student at a Midwestern univer- 
sity and h asked a girl from a 
college about 80 miles away to a week- 
end dance here. To what extent am I 
responsible for the cost of her transpor 
tation? Should 1 find a place for her to 
stay or will she take care of that herself 
—R. B., W te, Indiana 

You're responsible for your date's 
10101 weekend expenses. Unless you 
want to be a sport and dispatch. a 
chauffeured car or hire a private plane, 
we'd suggest you buy a round-trip train 
ticket; send il to her a week in advance 
dal the same lime, confirm the date and 
mention some of the activities you've 
planned, so shell know what clothes to 
bring). By all means, arrange for over- 
night accommodations. H would be wise 
1o pay for them in advance, so there 
won't be any confusion at checkout time. 


“fortified” w —B. N.. 


A wine such их port, madcira, ver- 
mouth or sherry that's been spiked— 
usually with brandy. Fortification raises 
the alcoholic content of the wine to 
about 20 percent, which not only gives 
it an additional kick but also helps keep 
it from spoiling. Since Federal author- 
ities do not approve the use of "fortified" 
on labels or in advertising, manufac- 
turers substitute the phrases “aperitif 
wine” and "dessert wine.” 


About ducc months ago, 1 purchased 
а stereo tape deck and a supply of pre- 
recorded tapes. Recently I1 mounted all 
the equipment on shelves and stored the 
records and tapes dose by. Yesterday I 
selected one of the tapes, slipped it onto 
the machine and was greeted with the 
worst jumble of surface noises I've heard. 


Listen? 


Which comes 
first when you 
buy your hi-fi 
components? 


It probably doesn't matter how 
you go about it as long as you 
end up with: 


1. Compatible components. 


2. À system that sounds 
good to you. 


It makes sense to start with 
the loudspeakers. In many 
ways, the speakers you choose 
will greatly determine the 
quality of sound that your sys- 
tem is capable of delivering. 


The speaker system should 
be tailored to the listening 
area. If you do this first, it 
can guide you in the selection 
of the other components— 
tuner, amplifier, record player 
or tape recorder. 


Obviously, you'll want to put 
the whole system together and 
hear the sound before you 
leave your dealer's showroom. 


One word of caution. Don't 
skimp on speaker quality. 
You can't hide poor quality 
speakers in a system. Sooner 
or later you'll hear the dif- 
ference. 


Your Jensen dealer will help 
you put together a balanced 
hi-fi system—one that sounds 
good to you. Stop in today and 
listen. 


Jensen Manufacturing Division, The Muler Company 
6601 South Laramie Avenue, Chicago, Illinois 60638 


since my dog walked on my Mantovani 
record. What could have happened? None 
of my friends are allowed to touch the 
pes—all of which, incidentally, Гус 
kept caretully packaged inside their cnd- 
board containers. Help!—B. R., Cincin- 
Ohio. 

The magnetic field produced by the 
transformer in your power amplifier is 
probably to blame. Tapes stored 100 
close to the amplifier (as well as near a 
radio ov TV sel) for any length of time 
ave likely to end up with the sound 
weakened or with a collection of irritat 
ing surface noises. In the future, store 
your tapes at least four feet away from 
the amplifier so that the magnetic field— 
ay well as the amplifiers keat—won't 
harm them. 


ha 


Ñ am presently dating an attractive 
young girl and although we are not go- 
steady, we have promised not to 
ny secrets from each other. While 
antending a very wild party, Í consumed 
100 much alcohol: thus, the eveni 
a total blank. The next day, seve 
friends gleefully painted vivid pictures 
of my drunken behavior. It scems I had 
done some things that would have 
shocked Casanova himself. Unfortunate: 
ly, I cannot determine the credibility of 
these tales, Should E tell all to this gil 
before somebody else docs, and risk a 
breakup? Or should I keep quier and 
hope the little rumors will go aw 

R. 5.. New York, New York. 

What you've told us is that you drank 
yourself blind at a party, probably be- 
haved indiscrectly and don't remember 
any of the details; your mutual non 
werery pct —which strikes us as sange 
and unnecessary in a casual relationship 
obliges you to tell the girl no more, no 
less. We think you'd be naive to eive out 
any more self-incriminating evidence 
than this based strictly on hearsay. 


keep 


AA bundi of the boys and myself were 
playing baseball poker (js and 9s arc 
wild and 45 get you another card) when 
we had a slight disagreement. In bi 
ball, the first three cards are down, then 
the fourth one is up. If the up са 
—thus calli lor an addition 
the extra card dealt face up or down? As 
far as we know, t 


is point isn't covered 
Hoyle.—E. H., Indianapolis, Indiana 

Face up. In all poker games, a bonus 
emd ix dealt the same way as was the 
preceding card. 


About a month ago, I asked а good- 
looking girl (I'd had my eye on her for 
vane time) to a jazze concert, since T 
knew we both dug the performing artist 
She stid she wanted to go, but that she 
had a girlfriend coming in from out of 
town and would have to entert her, 
too. Luckily, the girlfriend was cute, 


OP ART BY BREITLING 


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naturally, by all who practise timed sports. 


But, now, Breitling launches out with the world's first collection of 


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This Breitling Op Art series salutes the triumph of youth over tra- 
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t, etc—in short, a living doll 


ad а good friend who was avail- 
able, I told my date, Sue, that I was sure 
we'd be able to double. Unfortunately, 
three days before the date, Sue called and 
said her girlfriend wouldn't be coming 
into town alter all. Before I could say 
anything, she suggested her roommate as 
a suitable substitute and went on to say 
that she'd already made the arrange: 
ments. Now, I'd mer Sue's roommate 
and I wouldn't wish her on my worst 
enemy, let alone а friend. When I told 
my buddy about the change in plans, 
he told me to forget the whole thing 
Thus, 1 was forced to tell Sue that while 
our date was still om, my buddy had 
refused to double with her unatiractive 
roommate. The next thing 1 knew, she'd 
not too politely canceled the date. What 
did 1 do wrong? And what do you sug 
gest | do now? Ed still like to take the 
girl ош.—]. K.. Rochester. New York 

Sweet Sue had no business assuming 
hey late-date switch in blind dates would 
he automatically acceplable; moreover, 
she must have been aware that the de- 
cision nol to accept her roommate as a 
substitute noL yours. 
Issuming you wed a reasonable amount 
of tact in relaying your buddy's decision 
(hopefully, you didn't simply point out 
that he was allergic to aardvarks), you 
couldn't have foreseen that this would 
foul up your own plans 

From Sue's point of view, however, it's 
possible that she didn't wani to accept 
a fost date with à comparative stranger 
without having another couple on the 
scene, which would explain why she sub 
stituted her roommate when the out-of- 


was your friend's 


town girl changed plans, and why she cut 
you off when the double-date details 
didn't work out. 

If you're interested enough to try to 
salvage the situation, you might pick an- 
other concert date and a different male 


fricnd—one especially chosen because he 
will be apt to appreciate Sue's room- 
mate, and vice versa. Then call Sue 


anew and explain that you want to 
make amends for the previous mix-up by 
taking her and her roommate out on a 
double date. 1| she turns you off again 
you can be reasonably certain that even 
ij she'd gone on the first date, nothing 
come of it—and all you've 


would have 


missed is some aggravation. 


All reasonable questions—from fash- 
ion, food and drink, hi-fi and sports cars 
to dating dilemmas, taste and etiquette 
—will be personally answered ij the 
writer includes a stamped, self-addressed 
envelope. Send all letters to The Playboy 
Advisor, Playboy Building, 919 N. Mich- 
igan Ave., Chicago, Illinois 60611. The 
most provocative, pertinent queries will 
be presented on these pages each month. 


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PETRI PETRI PETRI PETRI PETRI PETRI PETRI 


PETRI CAMERA COMPANY, INC. 
7-25-12, Umeda, Adachi-ku, Tokya, Japon 


Playboy Club News Y 


1964 PLAYED 
VOL. I1, NO. 75-E. ONSTINCUISHED CLUBS IN MAIOR CITIES 


UNS INTERNATIONAL, INC. 


YOUR ONE PLAYBOY CLUB KEY 


SPECIAL EDITION ADMITS YOU TO ALL PLAYBOY CLUBS OCTOBER 1966 


LONDON CLUB TEMPORARILY CLOSES MEMBERSHIP 


Applications Now Accepted For 
Charter Membership Waiting List 


Response to Initial Membership Offering 
Forces Playboy to Close Membership Rolls 


LONDON (Special) — Robin 
Douglas-Home, Membership 
Secretary of the London Playboy 
Club, announced that due to the 
overwhelming response to the 
initial invitation to Charter 
Membership it has been neces- 
sary to temporarily suspend ac- 
ceptance of additional members. 

However, applications are be- 
ing accepted for a waiting list 
and, as rapidly as vacancies oc- 
cur, new membership keys are 
being issued. Those who apply 
first will, of course, be given first 
consideration by the Member- 
ship Committee. Applicants for 
the vaiting list simply execute a 
bankers’ form (see coupon) 
which does not become effective 
until their membership applica 
tion is accepted, The Club holds 
bankers’ order forms until a va- 
cancy occurs, at which time, when 
the application is accepted, the 
bankers' order form is deposited 
and the key is issued. 

The fantastic response to the 
fabulous London Club has 
prompted the expediting of 
plans to open Clubs in other 
U.K. and Continental cities. 
Right now Club executives are 


r Y. T 


Members wishing to try their luck 
at the Playboy Club tables 
find lovely Bunnies in attendance, 


inspecting locations in half a 
dozen cities with an eye to rapid 
future expansion. 

The London Club employs 
more than 100 beautiful Bun- 
nics in its five floors of club- 
rooms. Seven days a week, 
members enjoy every delightful 
amenity in seven fabulous club- 
rooms—the finest food and bev- 
erages, cabaret entertainment, a 
swinging discothéque and fun- 
filled gaming tables. 

The Playmate Bar features a 
convivial Piano Bar. Blackjack 


YOUR ONE KEY ADMITS 
YOU TO EVERY 
PLAYBOY CLUB 

OPEN — Atlanta - Baltimore 
Boston « Chicago • Cincinnati 
Detroit + Jamaica „ Kansas 
thy = London » Los Angeles 
Miami „ New Orleans * New 
York + Phoenix - St. Louis 
San Francisco 

LOCATIONS SET— Denver 
Lake Geneva, 
NEXT IN LINE—CIeveland 
Washington, D.C. 


Room and Grill. Live beat 
groups play nightly in the Liv- 
ing Room discothéque, famous 
for its bountiful buffet. The fin- 
est cuisine is impeccably served 
by velvet-clad butlers and Bun- 
nies in the elegant VIP Room. 
A VIP special feature is the 
16mm-film-projection setup. 
The Playroom cabaret show- 


games ‘and excitement to membere in ite ce 


room presents American and 
European artists, variety shows, 
dining and dancing. Members 
will find European gaming tables 
in Playboy's Penthouse Casino 
occupying the entire top floor of 
the Club. Other gaming areas 
include a Roulette Room and 
the Cartoon Corner, which fea- 
tures American games. 

Mail the coupon today—save 
£8.8.0 during The Playboy 
Club's first year and £5.5.0 each 
year thereafter. Better hurry to 
reserve your place on our Chart- 
er Membership waiting list. 


n fabulous club: 


APPLY NOW FOR CHARTER 
MEMBERSHIP WAITING 
LIST AND SAVE—CHARTER 
ROSTER LIMITED 
By submitting your application 
for membership at this time 
you reserve your place on the 
waiting list for the Charter Rolls 
(Initiation Fee £3.3.0; Annual 
Subscription £5.5.0) which as. 
sures you of a substantial sav- 
ing over Regular Membership 
Fee (Initiation Fee £6.6.0; 
Annual Subscription £10.10.0). 

The Playboy Club reserves 
the right to close the Charter 
Roster without prior notice. 


| ка w w emo m = == CLIP AND MAIL THIS APPLICATION TODAY = = = = = ——— 


TO: Robin Douglas-Home, Membership Secretary 


V — THE PLAYBOY CLUB, 45 Park Lane, London W.1, England ' 
Ë Here is my application for the waiting list for membership in The Playboy Club. ! have com- Í 
I pleted the bankers’ order form below with the understanding that it will be held by the Club | 
until a vacancy in the Charter Membership Rolls occurs. | have not filled in the “application 
acceptance date” below, as this information will be supplied by the Club when my application 
' date” below, as this information will be supplied by the Club wh plication Ш 
|] is processed and my Key-Card is sent to me. [| 
1 [| 
8 NAME OF BANK BRANCH I 
qp PLEASE PAY to Lloyds Bank Ltd., 84 Park Lone, W.1, to the account of The Playboy Club | 
|. (A/C No. 0150596) the sum of £8.8.0 (eight pounds, eight shillings) or.— — — day of | 
— —= = 2 < , the date of acceptance of my application for member- 
I ship in the London Playboy Club, 45 Park Lane, and pay annually £5.5.0 (five pounds, five | 
f hilines) on the anniversary of this date, being my subscription to The Playboy Club, until ] 
further notice in writing from me. 
I I 
I SIGNATURE. 1 
1 Membership No. Name. I 
1 Address. I 
L Occupation. 
ك‎ A ا‎ 


“(he°Brolly *Male*By Ж69#. 


Edwardian updated for the Uncommon Man. Tailored to fit the brawny American. 


YBOY 


PLA 


3 b 
Nelson D. B. Wool Melton Jacket with side vents, 6 buttons. Fleur du Jour VIII Shirt is wild with flowers. Rakish epaulets 
$40. Thistle Poor Boy 5" Turtle of shetland wool. $14.* Liver- add dash. $7.* Knucklecord Flame Slacks stride out with a 
pool Flame Slacks with a wide belt. $18." wide belt end angled front pockets. $13. 


^ 
А 


А 


Dorchester D. B. Blazer. Suavely shaped wool, side vents. Brogue International. Pile-lined corduroy jacket with slash 
$45. Tally Birks Shirt has a long-point button-down coller. pockets. $32.50.* Double Doon 5” Turtle Stryper stands tall. 
sg $7. * Pro Pal Cigarette Hopsack Slacks with belt. $16.* $17.* McCord Cigarette Hopsack Slack. $11.* 


"Prices slightly higher west of the Rockies Alsa boy-sized, boy.priced. Made in Canada, too. McGregor-Doriger, Inc. New York, N.Y. 10019. 


PLAYBOY'S INTERNATIONAL DATEBOOK 


BY PATRICK С 


иклшхє sour of the border? Why not 
go really south? You can now drive clear 
through Central America, with side trips 
by air and water to unique points of in- 
terest along the way. First stop on the 
run south of Mexico City should be 
Oaxaca not only for the superb hilltop 
ruins of preCortesian civilizations at 
Monte Albin and Mitla but for the pool- 
side relaxation at the Hotel Victoria and 
i at openair cules 
in the main square. Stop in Tehuante- 
pee if there's a fiesta and see the sadly 
tiful Sandunga folk dance, a local 
alty performed by the queenly 7 
women. The Bonampik Hotel in 
Gutiérrez has good resort values 
and а large swimming pool—and is a 
fine base for trips to the extraordinary 
ruins of Bonampak, to the huge Sumi- 
dero Canyon and even, by air tasi, to the 
jungle ruins at Palenque, The Sumidero 
Canyon. which has been compared to the 
and Canyon, can also be r 
nich from the nearby villa 
pa de Corzo. Uprive 
nd thence by bus, one can take in Bá 
їп-Мехісо, an Indian village named. 
Venustiano Carranza, where most of the 
women still wear nothing but a tight 
ad skirt. 


* charm of even 


Оле dlithe most picturesque villages 
in Mexico. San Cristóbal de Ias Casas 
has mag ish houses along 
cobblestone streets. it dies the 
mountain route into C Here 
you con ger away into green jungle. into 
the world of 500 тыс. in the s clit 
tive comfort that Americans have hither- 
10 enjoyed only in the deluxe lodges of 
Yu Just an hour and a half from 
Guatemala City, flying over unbroken 
jungle, youl sight a white "island" in 
the dense rain for 
esp center of Маул 
m prior to the great migration north- 
ward into Mexico. It now boasts 20th 
Century comforts at the Jungle Lodge, 
close to the ruined. pyramids and palaces 
of the city’s ancient civic and ceremonial 

m 
You can see Tikal 

temala 


a à one-day round 

new 
three- 
day exansion, which also gives you time 
to follow a network of graded roads to 
surrounding areas such as Uaxactün, in 


what was probably onc of the most triv- 
nd densely popu 


ted arcas of the 
d during the first few centuries a.D. 
You can get even more of the feel of 
this still mysterious  civilization—which 
understood the concept of zero quantity 
nd developed a calendar more accurate 
ihan our present one—in the nearby 


ng 
woi 


HASE 


Honduran ruins at Copán. You can 
Teach Copin and Quirigui on one 
threeday wip from Guatemala City that 
dudes such unespected extras as a mid 
ternoon swim at an abandoned marble 
rry fed by а beautiful waterfall. 
However, its easier to reach these 
junslelocked cities on a oneday round. 
trip by air from Tegucigalpa. This color- 
ıl old capital of Honduras is also a 
base for excursions to truly uncluttered 
beaches on a group of resort islands 
Utila, Roatin, Guanaja—in North Bay 
a few miles off the port of La Ceil 
‘They also can be reached directly by air 
from "Tegooz" Two new resort hotels 
are going up in La Ceiba but until 
they're ready, accommodations can be 
arranged for you in luxurious private 
homes. Many of Honduras’ leading c 
zens are opening the 
thus asurin 
and civi 


qu 


casas tO tourists, 
you of comfortable lodgi 
zed companions, 

If you prefer to fly, you can hit many 
of these points by air—then [2 
Colombia, where you should teat your 
self to a brief, well-organized jungle 
safari. Ies a fascinating experience, even 
if you don't bag one of the beautiful 
jaguars that are the most prized g 
Tapir, wild boar 
worthy Colombian trophies, The jungle- 
blanketed basin of the Amazon river is 
the best hunting ai nd November to 
March, the best season. These safaris are 
of guaranteed quality, because theyre 
zed by the Touring Club of Со. 
lombia with the direct help of the gov 
ernment’s National Tourist Board. 

As an alternative, try a trip upriver 
from Barranquilla through (he jungle 
on a small, air-conditioned pacdle-wheel 
мсатег to the oil center of Barranca- 
bermeja. The five- to six«day run between 
wild jungle banks broken occasionally 
by plantations, small. fishing villages or 
open mines includes several stops а day 
little villages and towns to load and 
unload е plenty 
of time to stroll ashore to visit with the 


me. 


nd puma arc o 


friendly natives. Incidentally, you c 
make this trip by boat one way, th 
fly back. 

Since sailing dares are indefini 


check them immediately upon arrival in 
а. then during the tw 
at's likely, enjoy relaxed 
living at the fine Intercontinental Prado 
Hotel in town or at the Americanowned 
Pradomar, half s drive down the 
coast. From here, too, you can make a 
an to the orchid center of Medellin and 
at the Nutibara Hotel. 

For furtherinformation write to Playboy 
Reader Service, Playboy Building, 919 
N. Michigan Ave., Chicago, Hl. 60611. 


Et tu, Brut? 


Bold new 
Brut 

for men. 

By Fabergé. 


For after shave, after shower, 
after anything! Brut. 
59 


саа ANJAS DROW GLASS — 
б “angels” in the Ranch Wear pack, and baby, they're nothin’ but (ough 
cater repellent, snag proof and wind resistant. 


There are actually 

Made of rugged double-fill cotton duck they’ 
Linings are natural sheep colored acrylic pile. Use the washing machine if you're crazy enough 
to want to go clean. And prices—$15 to $22. This ought to leave you some money for “colors” 
even (hough we feel that numbers, rivets and Nazi insignia somehow spoil the classic d 


if 


її 


= 


THE PLAYBOY FORUM 


an interchange of ideas between reader and editor 
on subjects raised by “the playboy philosophy” 


PRURIENT INTEREST 
wi 


Ws wrong with having one's pru- 
rient interest stimulated? Why should 
one have to pretend that one is bei 
deemed socially, if all oue happens to be 
interested in is having ones prurient 
terest stimulated? 
As а matter of fact, prur 
ellectively stimulated is of 
social importance, because it tends to 
¢ one more redeemingly sociable. 
Thomas E. Kennedy 
San. Diego, California 

The current U.S. Supreme Court defi- 
nition of obscenity has. as one of ils key 
criteria, a patent appeal to prurient in- 
* although a patent appeal to any 
primary interest other than sex is per- 
fectly permissible, and protected under 
the [ree speech and press prescriptions 
of the First Amendment. Sex, and sex 
alone. is so vile, repugnant, corrupting 
and worthless that its explicit. presence 
in ant and literature must be justified by 
other redeeming social values, 

In the second half of the 20h Century, 
contemporary man has split the atom 
and conquered outer space, but sexually 
speaking, he is still living in the Dark 


Ages 


re- 


ent interest 
redeeming 


feres 


"MAKE LOVE, NOT WAR" 

Dr. Boyett in your June Forum comes 
aking a very important. point 
es sex with hunting. He 


close ro m 


when he comp: 
Id have made a better point by com- 
with war In my opinion 
between 


“ 


ng se 


re is a de ection 
r on one 
on the other. 1 


that a widesp 


of war, and that the freer expressi 
sexual desires would tend to reduce the 
chances of war, (However, I do not [eel 
sullicienily competent in psychology and 
history 10 aucmpt 10 prove this.) 

1 believe we need more peaceful merh- 


The Supreme Court has declared that 
three elements must co-exist, independ- 
ent of one another, to establish ob- 
seenity: (1) the dominant theme of the 
material taken as a whole must appeal 10 
the prurient interest; (2) the material 
must be patently offensive by contempo. 
rary community standards; and (3) the 
material must be utterly without redeem- 
ing social value. 


ods of proving “manhood,” such as ath. 
levies, to replace war. While I am moie or 
less in favor of increased sexual freedom 
1 am primarily interested in reducing 
he chances of my sons’ being shot at as 


they become * 


me and address 
withheld by request) 
Many others have pointed out the para 
dox of our civilizations accepting and 
even glorifying many forms of killing 
(such as war. hunting and capital punish 
ment) while looking with extreme dis- 
taste on the act of love. 
Novelist Guy Endore recently wrote, 
in ETC. 


magazine: 


Have you меп a military 
book that was censored, or dented 
to youth? Have you ever seen a mili- 
tary book that had to vesort to aster 
ists to cover up certain un printable 
phrases? Do you know of a single 
bookdealer who has ever had to цо 
to court to defend himself on the 
charge of selling a military book? 
No, never. Military books are clean. 

You only have to picture to your 
self a young lad gomg into a stove 
to buy his fast rifle, and the same 
lad going into another store to buy 
his fisi contraceptive, to vealize that 
in the one case he will be forthright, 
proud, utterly without a sense of 
shame, while in the other he will 
be furtive, shy, tongue-tied, filled 
with embarrassment, though 
the one implies an act of hate, and 
the other an act of love. 


even 


concerned with this 
buttons that 
зау MAKE LOVE, NOT WAK, in an altempt 
to create a semantic environment in 
which vd more manly 
and more noble than war. IJ this idea 
gains currency—who knows?—someday 
hilling may be regarded as obscene 
instead of sex. 


Some citizens 
silualion are now wearin 


sex ds consid, 


SEX IN MILWAUKEE 

Fifty years ago, on April 22, 
this story appeared in the 
Sentinel: 


1916, 
Milwaukee 


When Milwaukee public bathing 
beaches open on J 1. the only 
restricuon as to costume will be th 
it be “decent.” according w |. C. 
Pinney, superinten 
buildings. 


nt of public 


The beaches, however, 


| 
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ТАРЕВЕР 
TURTLENECK 
WITH 


ACTION-FREE 
SIDE-VENTS 


| Also available in 
SHORT SLEEVES 


at your favorite store, or write. 


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- 850 Fifth Avenue, New York, N.Y. 10001 


6l 


PLAYBOY 


A fashion guide to Oxford 


Step off your BOAC jet at London, take a short drive and 
you've journeyed back eight centuries to one of the world's first 
universities 


Toseeit in style, carry a wardrobe of Robert Bruce sweaters 
bearing the wool mark label, mark of the world's best... pure 
virgin wool, For local pub-crawling, we suggest the Gentry (top 
left) cable knit pullover. About $17. Cardigan, about $19 


SIX 


For relaxing in The Grove at Magdalen College, choose the 
Trent Cardigan (top right) in machine-washable/dryable 9-ply 
lambswool. About $16. To enjoy Oxford's other arresting sights, 
pick one of the 20 London-tone colors offered by Robert Bruce 
in the Trent saddle shoulder V-neck (below) in machine-wash- 
able/dryable 2-ply lambswool. About $14. At fine stores every- 
where or write: Robert Bruce, Inc., Philadelphia, Pa. 19134. 


THE MARK OF 
THE WORLD'S BEST 
PURE 


VIRGIN WOOL 


will again be divided and men 
women will noi be allowed to sit in 
the sand together. Pinney declared, 
“We have по objection to men and 
women walking together on the 
beach. but when it comes to sitting 
down they will have to separa 
Pinney ako said that he has 
ceived requests that а wire fence be 
built into the water to Luther sepi- 
тне men and women bathers, but 
he says he docs not contemplate 


adopting the pl 


This week, the following story ap- 
peared in the same paper: 


sı was 


A 30 yearold Catholic р 
with disorderly conduct 
fter vice squad. officers 
wrested him he 


charged 
Thursday 
said (hey 
leaving a 
with a convicted 
Thursday, 

The priest appeared before County 
Judge Christ T. Seraphim, who ad- 
journed his case to May 23, and sent 
him to St. Michael hospital for ob- 
servation 

The prostitute . 
fore Conny Judge F 
]r. on a charge of prost 
Judge Duly set bail at 
adjomned her cse to May 9 


downtown hotel room 
prostite early 


.o appeared be- 
Ryan Dully, 


Oh, progress! Filty years ago, Iraterni. 
ain 


gations with the opposite sex w 
nial, now it merely insane! 
Jett Wheeler 


Milwaukee. 


Wisconsin 


REPUBLICAN SEX CREDO 

The University ofl Washington's 
Young Republican Club рамей (he fol- 
wing resolution: 
Be it wesolved by the University of 
Washington Young Republicans t 

1. AU privare sexual acts between ec 
senting persons above the age of 18 be 
exempted from the jurisdiction of public 
ad public law. provided. they 
з manner cileulat- 
a public disunbante or 
hy of peac 
Censorship and restraining ordi- 
ances on allegedly “obscene” material 
or media of erature and eutertain- 
ment be eliminated for all cases not in- 
jury to. persons 


volving demonstrable 
Incapable of exercising their Iree choice 


to abstain from the allegedly “obscen 
aspects of such citeritinment and (or 
media: 


З. Penalties against prostitution. pub 
lic soliciting and other public aspects of 
sexual behavior be limited only 10 cii- 
astances where avert coercion is dem- 
onstrated and where demonstrable injury 
has been inflicted on participants or by- 
sanders against their express consent: 

1. Sexual constituting statutory 
offenses under law, iie, where опе of the 
participants is under the age of 18, be 


acis 


Land held penalizable only by the 
» which the minor parti 
s demonsuably incapable of c 
ticipate or not 


jud 
degree 
the aa 
excising the choice to p: 
to particip 

5. Public institutions, such as state 
colleges and schools. be enjoined from 
enforcing any penalties and sanctions on 
sexual activity (hat overreach the limits 
set under public iw and the public 
courts. 


David W. Re 
University of Washington 
Seattle, Washington 


BALLAD OF CASEY JONES 

Didn't vou say that Hlinois has no law 
ainsi fornication? How, then, do you 
account for the wrest of the couple de- 
scribed in this aride hom The Daily 
Illini: 


Friday Casey Jones, former track 
and football athlete at the Univer 
sity of Illinois. and a female graduate 
student. were arrested on a charge 
of fornication signed by the owner 
‘of the apartment where dw 
memor allegedly occurred. 

Jones charges (hat he was 
amined t because ol 
being with 1 of another color. 
Jones is à Negro: the girl is white. 


H Jones and the girl had been arest- 
cd. because they aren't of the same race, 
wouldn't they have been charged with 
miseegemion, rather than fornication? 
Perhaps you can «Вау the article, and 
ше for me. 


law. 
Joel P. Bown 
Champaign. Hlinois 
Hefner has made several references in 
“The Playboy Philosophy” 10 the recent- 
ly revised Hinon sex laws being the most 
enlightened and liberal in the U.S.. but 
theyre still not as permissive as the 
Model Penal Code advocated by the 
dinerican Law Institute, or the even 
mare progressive legislation pro 
роса in this publication, Minois is the 
only slate that no longer has a vdomy 
satute, jor example: but it hay retained 
modified laws on fornication and adul- 
try. Thus, as Hefner pointed out, 
“Hiinas is in the unique. position. of 
permitting all so-called “perversion” both 
heterosexual and homosexual, while 
prohibiting normal sexual intercourse. 
Jet ally, the revised fornication and 
adultery laws in Hlinois do not apply to 
single acts of coitus, prohibiting only 
exlended relationships considered “open 
aml notorious.” or where an unmarried 
couple cohabity ay man and wife. 
The Casey Jones case that you cite iva 
typical example of the manner in which 
ering consensual хех асіну 


an 


vex 


Matutes c 
ате arbitrarily and capricionsly enforced. 
пой has na miseegenation law, so the 
local authorities the fornication 
law to acomplia the sime 
Whether or not the Illinois law could 


chow 
end. 


have been stretched to cover this situa- 
tion is uncertain. since the charges were 
dropped before the case ever gol to 
court; however, the real damage had al- 
ready been done to the two individuals 
involved, by the arrest itself and the sub- 
sequent publicity. 

Most of the 50 states have statutes 
against fornication and adultery. which 
only occasionally enforced. And 
pherever they exist, these laws are an 
invitation for abuse and misuse by the 
unserupulons—permitting the applica- 
tion of both personal and popular prej- 
udices in their random prosecution, as 
well as the intimidation. shakedown and 
biackmail of hapless citizens. 


ARCHAIC LAWS 
i; legal to buy tobacco in the state 
gion on Sunday bur 
buy uncooked: meat. Ji ] ıo buy 
newspapers and magazines but illegal to 
buy the works of Shakespeare in book 
form. You can. buy medical appliances, 
e a hairan. You can 
boots or shocs. 


illegal 10 


but you cannot h: 
buy milk bur 

Í respectfully suggest that your attack 
uld be 
aws й 
е public becomes informed 
as to the whole fabric of stupid, une 
lorecable, idiotic and anchaie kms cli 
tering up the statute books of each of onr 
states. no part of these H 
be removed. except by Sup 
anrhority. 


ws will ever 
me Court 


|i has been the 


various legis 


my that 
богу collectively do not 
have any guts and never will have—until 
the public collectively screams for their 
hides unless they act. 
Alva C. Long 
Auomey at Law 
Auburn, Washington 


experience 


SODOMY FACTORIES 


1 ran тоз ihis news item in the 
Cleveland. Plam Dealer and thought it 
might be of imerest ıo your. readers: 


Conjugal visits by wives and elim. 
ination of rigid prison restrict 
will be suggested to Ohio correc 
al атон 
tion of inmates in Oh 

А prel 
tions will be submited . . . 
to the Board of Christian Social 
Concerns of the Ohio Conference 
of the Methodist Church. by Rev 
Thomas E. Sagendorf of Powhatan 
Point. Belmont Cow 

The Rev. Mr. Sagendorf was « 
of four religions interns at the pe 
y list summer who took part 
1 raining pro: 


on recom- 


repo 


mend 


tenti: 


пас 
gram conducted by the prison chap- 
in and approved by е prison 
administration. 

He now is barred from v 


ical paste 


ing or 


63 


PLAYBOY 


64 


exchanging mail with inmates, al- 
though prison administrators. indi- 
dl they have not closed the door 


nt of the privileges. 


са 


to reinstate 


The Rev. Mr, Sagendor! believes 
conjugal visits would he a major ad 
vance ro meet the sexual problem 
among inmates. He says a homo- 


sexual mood envelops almost all 
mates... 

The Rey. Mi. Sagendoif. believes 
a factor in his being barred. stems 
from the proposal he and other 


mens submitted (0 penitentiary 
administrators in which they recom- 
mended piaynoy magazine be sold 


es. He said this would lead 
a "womenoriented" mood 
1 of a homosexual. onc. 


In looking at a criminal who is йй 
tionalized, perhaps we must take a mo 
synoptic approach- a look ar the whole 
man. Only if we assume that the person 

and thu's begging the 
question in regard to an institution with 
3500 inmates can we dismiss his desire 
Тог sexual companionship. Obviously. as 
long as normal heterosexual relations 
2 denied до convias, our prisons will 
be nothing else but sodomy lactorie 
Louis 7. Gasper 


is sublun 


MASTURBATION AND MORALITY 
1 wonder why your two sophisticated 


tholic apologists, from Princeton Jun 
tion and Dubuque, withheld their names 


when trying to justify the notion that 
asturbation is à mortal sin, 1 can only 
ne that, deep down in their hearts. 
© utterly ashamed of the full im- 
plications of their doctrine, For il is, 
the Church that 
nt. in a state 
his resurrected 


alas, the teaching of 
anyone who dies unrep 
ol mortal sin. will—in 
suller unimaginable tortures by fire 
forever and ever- On this matter, I could 


quote chapter and verse [rom the most 


body— 


authoritative and celebrated theologians 
We are od ag in a universe 
whose inmost gence aud energy. 


the love that moves the sun and other 
md which was incarnate in Jesus 
of Nazareth, will assign those who delib- 
Stately enjoy masturbation to unending 
tof both body and soul. Genth 
men, please come off it! As a Chinese 
proverb puts it, “Do not swat a Hy on a 
friend's head with a пасе? 
Ман Watts, D. D. 
Sausalito, Calilornia 
Dr. Watis written and lectured 
widely on the theologies of Christianity, 
Vedanta, Buddhism and. Taoism, and is 
the former dean of the Institute of Asiat- 
jc Studies, San Francisca. His works im- 
clude “Easter: Us Story and Meaning,” 
“Psychotherapy East and West? "The 


has 


Way of Zen.” “Behold the Spirt” and 
Beyond Theology: The АН of God- 
таныыр.” 


JESUITICAL LOGIC 

The Catholic. theologi 
that masturbation is à mortal sim, but 
then again srt a mortal sin when "cer 
tain psychological states. produce a state 
of psychic need for а” (The Playboy 
Forum. June 1966). produced а master 
piece of evasion. Just how many sweat 
beads per inch must the “psychological 
state” produce before everything is jake 
with the Maker? Ink might have been 
saved if, instead of dancing in and out 
of the verbal shrubbery, the Catholic 
n from Dubuque had simply 
“Do it but hate yourself” 
ionalist must have Felt a trem- 
or of delight on earning that the Gatho- 
lic Church. “considers her moral doctrine 
to be a living system constantly seeking 
to discover the personal good of men . . 
ind “Catholic theologians continue to do 
research in every area of sexual morality." 
Where me they rewarching—on the 
moon? What have they discovered? They 
have probably discovered that. they c: 
afford тө be 50 years behind the í 
but if they ny ro sveich it to 75, 
flock turns ugly. 


who wrote 


Sidney Ledson 
Zweibrücken, Germany 
The theologian from Dubuque is di- 
rectly comtradieted by the official leach- 
ings of his Church. See the following 
letter. 


THE SIN OF POLLUTION 

several years in a Roman С: 
ry and Benedictine monas- 
conunually faced with 
ion and homosex- 


1 spen 
olit sc 
тү and was 
problems of mast 
uality. both of which were widely prac 
ticed in the iwo seminaries T attended. 1 
believe that both of these practices were 


merely substitutes for heterosexual coi 
tacts, None of those whom 1 knew to 
practice them were either. ordained to 


the priesthood or admitted to the veli- 
gious community. They no doubt recog 
nized these activities for what they were 
and left for secular Hile 

The purpose of this Terie ply io 
state the position of the Roman € atholic 
Church on sexual pleasure ouside of 
marriage 

Allow me 10 quote from Moral Theol- 
ogy by Heribert Jone. O.F.M. 


SINS OF IMPURITY IN GENERAL 
Morality: АН direcrly voluntary 
sexual pleasure is mortally sinful 


side of marriage. This is true even il 
the pleasure be ever nd 
significan. Here there is no light- 
ness of matter—even the ind 
1 whom the sex urge is abnormally 
intense (sexual hyperesthesia) con and 


so brief 


viduals 


must control themselves... 
Pollution — (selbabuse, masturbi- 
tion) 


1. Concept: Pollution is complete 
Sexual satisfaction obtained by some 
form ol sell stimulation 


relerence 10 "semi 
nition evades the 
various controversies concerning the 
specific dillerence of this sim in men, 


By ахои 
n" our del 


na 


women, eunuchs. amd those who 
have not reached the age of puber 
ту. since only men are capable of se- 


of 


Creting se 
the word 
2. The malice of pollution; Di 
valy voluntary pollution is always 
sinful. Tt maners not whether the 
pollution is intentionally provoked 
or whether оп tikes volunt; 
pleasure in an involuntary emission. 

-. To promote a pollution inte 
tionally is always gravely sinful even 
though it is done for other ends 
ccording to а 
n of the Holy Othce of Aug. 
i, ir is also forbidden directly 
to produce a pollution to obtain а 
semen specimen for the purpose of 
medical diagnosis. There is no new 
specilic malice contracted by the 
various ways in which pollution is 
procured . . . 

Distillation 15 the emision of 
subirle nonprolific urethyal fluid the 
purpose of which is to facilitate the 
ejection of the semen. ... Some 
times it rakes place independently 
ol pollu . Distillation which 
is accompanied by venereal pleasure 
is a sin of the same gravity and spe- 
^ as pollution. What has been 
d of pollution applies here 


en in the proper sense 


jon. . 


loss c 


As сап be sc 


seed is hardly 
co ice it will happen any- 
way in the event of nocturnal emission, 
which is a normal physical occurrence 


caused by the normal build-up of semi- 
nal fluid. in the body 

Jone continues io discourse on every 
conceivable sexual act, so as to leave 
doubt im the mind about the Church's 
attitude. There are probably very lew 
Re Catholies who are aware ef this 
condemnatio al pleas 
ure. These are nor the ravings of a si 
author, but the consensus of all Roman 
Catholic moral. theologi 

I you see fit to publish this letter 
please withhold my name and 
1 live in all town with a large Ro 


miled ol sex 


duress. as 


E 
ойе populuion, 
(Name and address 
withheld by request) 
Jones “Moral Theology” bears the 
nihil obstat of Pius Kahu, Censor De 
putatus, and the imprimatur of Bishop 
John J. Wright of Pittsburgh, with the 
explanation, “The nihil obstat and in 
piimatur are official declarations that а 
book or pamphlet is fice of doctrinal or 
moral error.” 


man Cat 


HARMLESS MASTURBATION 
Inthe June Forum, 
theologian of Dubuque. low 
corning masturb: 


the 


holic 
con 
When habitus 


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the boots 
are by Verde 


347 swinging styles — 
boots, demi-boots, 
brogues, buckles, 
weaves—you name it. 
Just name it Verde 
at any one of 2,786 
great stores 
throughout the U.S. 
unusually distinctive Footwear for man 
оке Varde 


Brockton, Massachusetts 02403 


> 
° 
m 
> 
= 
м 
A 


it weakens mental and will power 
Unless he is privy to otherwise un- 
availible information, he is helping to 
perpetuate a common folk misconcep- 
tion. Masters and. Johnson's authoritative 
volume Muman Sexual Response states, 
“There is no established medical evi- 
dence (har masturbation. 
frequency (u 
usi population. € 
mental illness. Cer 
cepted medical standa 
sive masturbation 


al defining exces- 


Harold W. Reed 
Ohio University 
Athens. Ohio 


CALLING ALL CATHOLICS 

Wh open a dialog with Cathol- 
sm? Is it fair to represent religions 
claim only by letters from defrocked 
Unitarian ministers? 


David C. Wilmot 
Chicago, Minois 
The numerous clergymen of all faiths 
who have written letters to “The Playboy 
Forum” —Methodists, Baptists, Presby- 
teins, Episcopalians, Jews and Catho- 
lics, among others—will be distressed to 
learn that you have converted them all to 
Unitarians. and defrocked Unitavians at 
that. The "Forum" is an open dialog for 
anyone who cares to contribute. 


STERILIZATION BY COURT ORDER 
А news story in the Sam Francisco 
Chronicle recounted what surely must be 


tunately, sanity triumphed and the st 


has a happy ending: 


Nancy Hernandez escaped 
day jail term yesterday and won 
three years probation—without 
The 2Lycarold mother of two 
children had pleaded guilty in April 
misdemeanor charge that she 
a room where her common- 
law husband. [oe Sanchez was 
smoking, marijuan: 
Thereupon, Municipal Court 


Judge Frank P. Kearney had given 
her a choice: the maximum penalty 
of six months in jail, or py 
if she would allow herself to be 
sterilized. 
The judge noted she was gening 
welfare and “living a dissolute life." 
Without counsel, she agreed to 
sterilization. Then Louis Renga, 
courrappoinied anorney. argued 
inst it; she changed her mind, 


was semencal ro a deser term ot 
90 days. 

Renga, petitioning for a writ of 
habeas corpus, contended sterili 


Hy out of proportion 
me, and since this was a 
Mense, she should be given 
probation. under “the usual cond 
tions.” 


Su 


онн Judge C. 
h handed. down his т 


Dough 
smi ing D 
fore a packed courtroom. yesterday. 
He agreed with Rengas reasoning 
nd held that Jud y acted 
outside the Liv. 

Judge Sn 
dilliculi to how sterilizatio 
ghi proiect her, or anyone che, 
r of becoming an 


h ala si 


sce 


y thought that any judge any- 
e is so sick or misguided that he 
thinks he has the right to order the seri 
tiznion of any other human being gives 
me the shivers. Can anyone think that 
smoking pot is that bad? 

(Name withheld by request) 
Francisco, Californi: 


FISH STORY 

I dow believe that you 
а strong antisexual and antisoc 
ment that is now afoot. The 
tional Maritime 
setting up a ivorous 
lobbying and wildcat strikes against. the 
manufacturers. conveyers and. sellers of 
the birih-control pills. The reason for 
says the LM, A. is that the 
Û pill is unfair to American 


© aware of 
al 


semen. 


Jerre A. Rickles. D. D. S. 
Houston. Texas 
The Nantucket whalers ave protesting 
tow. They polls me 
sperm whales. 


зау the 


unfair to 


THE HUAC HOODOO 

The House Comminee on U 
can Activities held public he 
Chicago last wear. Among id 
poenaed by the Commitee were 
biomedical research scientists. 
Stamler, M. D.. and his resci 
Mrs. Yolanda Hall, 

On advice of le, 
ler and Mrs. Hall agreed to il 
a civil suit to test the constitution: 
and legality of: (1) (he House Resol 
tion that established the Committee, (2) 
the proceedings held in Chicago and (3) 
the subpoeneas served them. In orde 
not to render moot their action in civ 
court, Dr. Stamler and Ais. Hallo 
advice of their attomeys—lecined for 
the present do be i wel by the 


two 


° constitution- 
1 issues a heard in the civil 
counts. тү to usual procedur 
the House Committee proposed te br 
Dr. Stamler and Mis. Hall into criminal 
court, Phe Comminee Bad prepared its 
request to the. House of. Representatives 
to cite them for contempt. Mr. Albert E. 


Jenner, Jr. counsel for Dr. Stamler and 
Mrs. Hall. has requested: members ol 
ul se do vote against a contempt 
ciun siderable opposition to. the 


citations has beeu expresed by many 


wes in the 


highly respected 


ical 


legal and other professional fields. Edito. 
rab in The New York Times, The 
Washington Post and Chicago Daily 


News strongly wget Congress to reject 
any contempt асбон. 

At this writing, the Congressional vote 
has been postponed. Bo is to be hoped 
Ши this vote will be ser aside indefi 
nitely, in order to permir the civil lisa 


tien to proceed in due course. 

We are convinced that the civil suit 
instituted by Dr. Stamler and Mrs. Hall 
their attorneys ñ а most sig 
action, questioning—on the most 
fundamental | constitutional grounds— 
both the Committees right to exist and 
ity tactics We trust you share our c 
viction—expressed by counsel. fa 
Stamler 


Dr 
ad Mrs. Hall before the Com 


lat its ee ied. fun 
ht о be put to a court challenge, 
In its importance, this suit transcends 
the situation confronting the two indi 
viduals immediately involved. However 
many of us have known Dr. Stamler for 
1 have the highest regard f 
him as an outstanding scientist and ¢ 
structive citizen of the United States. He 
is one of the ablest and most honorable 
medical research specialists in this coun- 
wy. In the interest not only of Dr. Stam 
ler but also of continuing progress in 
in the health of manki 
strongly desire to assure continua 
his very importan program ol long-term 
ch on the etiology and preven 
liovascular diseases. We ire pleased 
that the Chicago Board of Health unani 


proving 


mouslv decided to continue Dr. Stamler's 
emplayment 
We 


the 
this 


earnestly ask 
^» rades in 
endeavor. 

Dudley White. M 


support of 
signilica 


D., Chairman 


a P. Perkins. jr. M. D., 
D., Secretary 
Robert W Wissler, Ph D., 
M. D., ‘Treasurer 


Box 36 
University of Chicago 
». Hlinois 
Paul Dudley White, chairman of the 
“Jeremiah Stamler Legal Aid Fund” i 
an internationally known heart special 
it who attended President Eienhe 
during his illnesses. Approximately 250 
leading physicians, educators and theolo- 
gians also signed this letter 
Commenting on the issues invalved in 
this cave, Dy. Stamler himself has said: 


fs а working scientist, I learned 
early that false initial assumptions 
inevitably lead ta false conclusions 
and. erroneous proposals. Thus. as 
long as the false notion persisted — 
prio to Galileo, Kepler and Cope 
mew—that the sun rotated around 
the earth. there could he ne veal 
science of astronomy, Ах long as the 
belief hell опро to Hareey— 
that the blood surged to and fro, 


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67 


PLAYBOY 


68 


and did not circulate, there could 
be no veal science of physiology or 
medicine. As long as the supersti- 
tion held sway that persons with 
mental illness were possessed by 
devils, there could be по scientific 
psychiatry. And in my own held of 
research on arteriosclerosis, there 
could be no substantial progress un 
til the false premise had been dis 
pelled that this was not a disease but 
rather an aspect of normal aging. 

The Committee on Un-American 
Activities—I am deeply convinced — 
is dm profound error precisely be- 
cause it proceeds throughout on the 
basis of totally erroneous. premises. 
In fundamental false assumption is 
that it has the right and ability to 
define Americanism, and to fix its 
criteria јот Un-Americanisn—and. 
on the basis of these arbitrary self- 
selected. standards, ferret ош “Une 
Americans.” 

As already emphasized, the adop- 
tion or imposition of false premises 
and hardened dogmas in science has 
a grossly debilitating effect. It is a 
truism that the forward advance 
o] science—ineluding biomedical 
science—in its continuously expand- 
ing effort to master nature for the 
benefit of mankind, requires a 
healthy free intellectual climate, a 
true open marketplace—national 
and international—for the exchange 
and flow of ideas. Represswe politi- 
cal interference in science can have 
only one effeci—to stifle and hold. 
back the acquisition of vital knowl- 
edge, to do great harm to research 
programs that have the potential to 
bring great benefit to all Americans 
and all humanity. This threat is 
very real and concrete in the 
present instance. 


PROSTITUTION AND ADOLESCENCE 

1i is common in my country to think 
of Yankees as very simple people who go 
round the world with the Bible and 
utilitarianism on one hand and a huge 
number of prejudices on the other—ra- 
cial prejudices, fundamentally. It is com- 
forting to read rravmov and learn, not 
just from Hefner's writings but also 
from the intelligent letters in the Fo- 


rum, that many Yankees are more so- 
phisicued than we had realized. 
On the subject of prostitution, 1 


would di 


ny that the cause is economic. 
Modern society s s not offer any 
ahernative other prostitution to 
the adolescent. sec з outlet for his 
sexual needs. Freud ишу, 
that the prime cause ol the entire 
conllict of the modern world is this pe 
od of so-called “adolescence,” which is 

tilicial creation. Adolescence is the 
time between sexual maturity (which is 
1 rity 


noted, bril 


logical and real) and legal ma 


(which is arbitrarily defined by society). 

Jt is during this period that most males 

are forced to resort to prostitutes. 
J. А. Grompone 
Montevideo, Urugu 


PROSTITUTION AND SEX FREEDOM 
Prostitution is the single most bru 


1 degrading relationship that can ex 
ist between human beings. Even the 


slave and the rape зіс have one re- 
maining shred of dignity left: They sub 
mit because of superior force. But the 
whore allows the altar of her body to be 
violated: Her oppressor enters withi 
her skin and possesses her more 
mately than property itsell is possessed. 
Nothing possibly could be a more vile 
perversion of human dignity 

Both the puritan and the liberal 
right and both are wrong. The puritan 
knows that prostitution is a great evil 
and he thinks he can destroy it by pun- 
ishment. The liberal, on the other hand, 
knows that. punishment will not destroy 
prostitution and, therefore, accepts it. 
Before we can consider ourselves totally 
ivilized. prostitution must be complete- 
ly abolished, just as cannibalism and 
Slavery h bolished by our ances- 
tors belore they could consider th 
selves partially civilized. The only w 
to abolish it, howev 
childr 
male, ever, will be so sexually starved 
that he is forced to become a predator 
and rent the body of another human 
being. 


John J. Walk 
Dallas, Texas 


PROSTITUTION AND MARRIAGE 
is prostitution considered immo: 
The relation between the prostitute 
and her customer is just like that be- 
tween husband and wile. Married. mei 
bribe their wives for their favors wi 
gilts on birthdays, Christmas and ho 
days. A wile is, simply, à prostitute paid 
room and board for continuous service 
пісу Eige 
University of Pittsburgh 
Bradlord. Pennsyl 


LEGALIZED PROSTITUTION 
Prostitution should be legalized. The 
entire profession should be placed under 
the control of the Department of 
Health, Educuion and Welfare. The 
Department could enforce cleantines 
standards and disease control and rid 
the business of criminal elements. Under 
Government control the exploi 
prostitutes and the victimizing of cus- 
tomers could be held 1 a 
Also, the € 
eration could be 
and all the innu 
vicc squads in the country could be 
turned to more useful duties. 
Ronald L. Harrison 
New York, New York 


overnment take from this op- 
liquor taxe 


PROSTITUTION AND CHASTITY 

Your point. of view apparently is that 
since. prostitution. las always been. with 
us, it should be accepted and legalized. 
This being the ease, why nor also accept 
ad legalize and theft, since 
they, too, h: en with us since our 
very begi A long history does not 
validate wceptamce of any given 
tivit 
Also, 
mente 


the 


1 the May Philosophy, you coi 
. "As long as the concept of fe 
male chastity . . . is more important 
than her personal welfare, woman will 

inue ıo occupy human 
position in society.” Where do you get 
your evidence 10 support this thought 
How can you separate sexual integrity 
ad personal welfare? One of the things 
t has always given woman her most 
highly respected personality and pos 
ion in our society has been sexual integ- 
rity in keeping with the morals, as well 
as the faith, founded in the Judseo- 
hristian community. You state that 
Judaeo Christian heritage of anti 
is essen ifemale" and that 
woman is incipal vic- 
tim of sexual suppression." Somewhere 
you have nd dat the 


less- 


al 


Judaco-Christian 
ified woman to a 

iy and social 
have never heard that it was through a 


woman that God chose to reveal His 

Son, Jesus Christ. 
The Rev. Don E. M 
Livingston Methodist Church 
Livingston, Alabama 


PROSTITUTION PERSECUTION 

It is immoral, illegal and unco 
tional that wome 
and punished for selling sex. 

I've become sick and tired of seeing 
fellow females persecuted, when uo hall- 
way att woman walk down 
any ime without being 
approached by men. Prostitutes sulle 
the indignities of a minority group in 
Ате Та San Francisco t 
many male prostitutes as female, but the 
males are seldom arrested. Not lon 


titu 
should be pursued 


те are as 


little colored girl for repe: 
JE that isn’t cruel and rid 
know what is. 

1 am grieved when I see girlfri 
suffer persecution and. inhumane wi 
ng when all they are doing is sell 
ing that with which they were born. It is 
in demand, and it 
as they want. Isn't that simple democ 
racy? Isn't that the law of supply and de- 
mand? Most prostitutes are mo 


hunt 


is theirs 10 do with 


humans. Why should selling what is 
just 


theirs deem them unlit for society 
because most of society considers se: 
I immoral? Why must prostitutes live 
seamy life in the und 
persecuted in the barga 

(continued on page 188) 


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PLAYBOY INTERVIEW: MEL BROOKS 


a candid conversation with the zany comic and co-creator of tvs top-rated spy spoof, “get smart? 


Our interviewer this month is satirist 
Larry Siegel. A regular contributor to 
riaynoy for the past eight years, he has 
written prolifically for “That Was the 
Week That Was" and other TV shows, 
and is co-author of the smash hit revue 
“The Mad Show." He is also a congenital 
har. For whatever Ws worth, he writes of 
his subject: 

“Our paths first crossed many years 
ago on the Lower East Side of New 
York. 1 ran into him in an apartment on 
Hester Stree. He was standing near an 
open window, and there was a look of 
sadness in his face. What troubles you, 
my little one? 1 asked him. I'm thinking 
of committing suicide; he said. simply. 
“From the window of a basement apart- 
ment? 1 asked. I was planning to jump 
ирг he replied. 1 liked him immediately 
his bright sense of humor; his way with 
а song: his big, shiny eyes. "Yowll go 
places, I told him. He did. Today you 
know him as Flipper. But what of Mel 
Brooks, the brilliant comedy writer and 
performer? Where does the artist end 
and where does the legend begin? Where 
does the legend end and where does the 
man begin? Where does the man end 
and where does the woman begin? 

"For years the world knew very little 
about Mel Brooks. Often during the late 
Fifties | would trudge over to the UN 
Building, interrupting General. Assem- 
bly meetings to inquire, “What does the 
world know of Mel Brooks? ‘Very little” 
said Dag Hammarskjöld. "Not much? said 
Henry Cabot. Lodge. ‘Eat’ said Golda 


"The trouble with Playmates and. Bun- 
nies is that they've 100 openly sexy and 
cleun-cut. Foe been taught ever since 1 
was a kid that sev is filthy and forbidden. 
and that's the way 1 think it should һе” 


Meir. Then the now-famous archaco- 
logical team of Hart, Schajfner & Marx 
while digging recently off Coney Island 


for the lost city of Bayonne, New Jersey, 
сате across the historic Sandy Hook 
Scrolls, and the pieces of the story began 
fo fall inio place, not necessarily їп or- 
der of importance: “Mel Brooks . . . 39 
years old. born and bred in Brooklyn 
. short, slender, galvanic, [етее 
1932 vingarlevio champion of Atlantic 
Aue 2000-year-old man opposite 
- co«reator of TV's "Get 
Smart” two-sewer stichbull hitter . . 
author-narratoy of the Oscar-winning 
short subject “The Critic" . . . wriler for 
Sid Caesar and other comics . . . notorious 
hide-and-seek home-sticker . . . 2500-year- 
old brewmaster for Ballantine Beer . . . 
married 10 actress Anne Bancroft 
father of the Pony Express...) and so on. 
“Shortly after the disco: of the 
Scrolls, 1 was contacted by тълувоу. My 
assignment: Diterview Mel Brooks. Why 
me? 1 inquired. ‘He hates people? I was 
told. "but maybe hell talk to you.’ 
“Fair enough? 1 said. ‘How do 1 contact 
him? Tt won't be easy. PLAYBOY warned. 
"Oh, an unlisted phone number?” I in- 
quired knowingly. Yes! I was told. ‘Bul 
there ave additional complications. H's 
with an unlisted phone compan 
“Undaunted, 1 vented а loud-speaker 


truck and drove through the streets of 
New York blaring out the name: ‘Mel 


Brooks!’ Though this ploy jaded to lo- 
cate him, E was to learn later that Brooks 
received 40,000. write-in voles in the 


“There's nothing lovable about Maxwell 
Smart. He's a dangerously earnest nitwit 
who deals in monumental He 
doesn't trip over skates: he N 
countries to the Communists.” 


mayoraliy election. 1 next considered 
skywriling a message lo him, only to dis- 
cover that Pepsi Cola had a ten-year ор 
tion on the sky. 1 complained to God 
about this arrangement, and even went 
over His head to Lyndon Johnson. Al 
to no avail. Personal messages from me 
to Brooks then followed—on fences, m 
gutters, on. restroom walls, in, public 
phone booths 

“Finally one evening, on the corner of 
Lafayette and Houston Sheets in Man- 
hattan, 1 was accosted by a dwarf named 
Fingerhut. Saying, 1 am the only human 
being who has seen Mel Brooks in the 
past ten years. he handed me a slip of 
paper with a telephone number on it 
and disappeared. into the night, When T 
got Brooks on the phone, I could sense 
by the way he began the conversation 
that he wasn’t overly anxious to talk to 
me. ‘Hallo; he said in a thick Russian 
accent. "This is Aleksei Kosygin’s resi- 
dence. Mr. Kosygin is not in. For several 
until 


weeks 1 continued calli hum. 
finally 1 wore down his resistance: He 
consented to meet me outside a hard- 


ware sene in Mamaroneck that coming 
Shrove Tuesday. ‘How will 1 recognize 
you? 1 asked. ‘You'll have no trouble? 
he said. IH be dressed like Joan Craw 
ford. E arrived ut the chosen spot at the 
assigned time, and after waiting three 
hours, finally saw someone dressed like 
Joan Crawford. 1 accosted him, but as 
luck would have it, it turned out ta be 
Joan Crawford. 

‘One how later, as E was being booked 


“When the Teutons have been nipping 
at your heels for thousands of years, you 
find it enervating to keep wailing, So you 


make jokes. If your enemy ix laughing, 
how can he bludgeon you to death?” 


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Jor assault down at the station house, who 
should show up—looking lovely in a pink 
picture hut, wide-shouldered woolen dress 
and spiked heels—but Brooks himself, ar- 
rested for loitering in front of a Chicken 
Delight stand two blocks fiom our ар- 
pointed sendesvous, 1 got hungry waiting 
Jor you. he explained. The following 
interview—interrupled by visits from our 
lawyers, friends, relatives, reporters and a 
MAYLOY photographei—was rapped out 
in Morse code Urving's, not Samuel's) on 
the walls of our cell.” 


PLAYBOY: Mel, we'd like to ask you 
BROOKS: Who's we? 1 sce one person in 
the room. Not counting me. 

PLAYBOY: By "wc" we mean PLAYBOY. 
BROOKS: In other words, you're asking 
questions for the entire sexually liberated 
PLAYBOY org 
PLAYBOY: Yes. 
BROOKS: By the way. how much are you 
paying me for thi 
PLAYBOY: We don't pay our interview 
subjects. 

BROOKS: How about vou. Mr. We? Do 
you get paid for this thin 
PLAYBOY: Well, ves. Bur that’s because 
we're employed by rravaov. With the 
help of the editors, we prepare the ques 
lien: id conduct the interview 

BROOKS: I'll tell you what. PH ask you 
questions. Let them pay me 

PLAYBOY: Mel, can we begin now? 
BROOKS: Fine. do you te? 

PLAYBOY: Lers sit this опе ош. Youve 
recently completed a series of radio com 


manion? 


500 year 


mercials as Ballantine Beer's 
old Brewmaster.” Irs a character quite 
nous 2000-year-old 


in you jog satirical 


similar to your 


man, in that once 
ly through the pages of history. But the 
big difference is: Now you're. peddling 
beer. Why did you sell out to Madison 
Avenue, like they say? 

BROOKS: | decided th I had given 
enough of myself to n nd. After all 
my definitive [2-volume series on en 
lightened penology was completed; my 
ма and P had UNESCO running in 
apple-pic order: and of course 1 had just 
come up with the vaccine 
cystic fibrosis. So 1 felt I could afford to 
allow myself a few monetary indulgences. 
PLAYBOY: Why Madison Avenue? 
BROOKS: Frankly, they made me the best 
offer, 

PLAYBOY: What were some of the other 
offers you received? 

BROOKS: Well, Fifth Avenue offered me 
$4000 a week, Lexington Avenue offered 
me $3500, and the Bowery's oller was 
insulting. 

PLAYBOY: Why Ballantine Beer? 

BROOKS: They gave me cute blanche. T 
had complete script approval. Although, 
truthfully, we never used scripts. My in 
terviewer, Dick Caven, and 1 stuted 
with a premise and then winged it, We 


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made all kinds of tapes, but they uscd 
only the ones that we liked. 
PLAYBOY: Do you enjoy working with 
vett as much as you do with Carl Reiner 
on your 2000-year-old-man records? 
BROOKS: They're completly different 
types. Dick is а bright, young, incredibly 
gentile person, and the juxtaposition of 
texture—the gentile alongside the Jew— 
is very effective. Farshtey? By the way, 
I'm spectacularly Jewish. 

PLAYBOY: We would never have guessed 
BROOKS: Vraiment? 

PLAYBOY: Is the Jew-gentile jux: 
the only reason you like wor 
Сахеи? 

BROOKS: Of course not, dummy. Dick is a 
marvelous foil for me. He's. innocent 
and guileless, and he just aches to be cut 
to pieces. He reacts beautifully during 
the interviews, especially when T call 


position 
ing with 


him “company “pusher,” "marsh- 
mallow,” "flufly," “sellout.” 

PLAYBOY. The Brewmaster has a thick 
German accent. The 2000-yearold ma 


has a Jewish accent. Why do you usc di- 
alects when you perform: 
BROOKS: IUs casier to hide behind ac- 
cents. Once you're playing a character 
you have more mobility, morc freedom. 1 
suppose it's also cowardice on my part. 1 
сап say anything I want. and then if 
people question me, I say, "Don't blame 
mc. Blame the old Jew. He's crazy. 
PLAYBOY: Aren't you а lot like your old 
boss, Sid Caesar, in this respect? 
BROOKS: Yes. When | began working with 
Sid on Your Show of Shows, | w 
that he always had grouble expressing, 
himself as So Td always try 
to pro п accent or a char: 
acter to hide behind. Once in character, 
Sid is the funniest man in the world. 
PLAYBOY: What made you decide to give 
the 9000-ycar-old man a Jewish accent? 
BROOKS: Irs not a Jewish accent. It 
American-Jewish accent. And in 50 yc 
it will disappear. 1 think irll be a great 
loss. 

PLAYBOY: You're obv 
Jewish. 

BROOKS: Proud and scared. 

PLAYBOY: How do you feel about the cur- 
kick in American humor? 

ss Jews do Jews accurately, 
1 consider the whole thing to be in ques 
tionable taste. 

PLAYBOY: Then the character of the 2000. 
rold man is never in questionable 


ticed 


y proud of being 


taste 

BROOKS: | don't think so. He may be 
pompous ar times: he may be a nut, but 
he's always honest and compelling. And 
the accent is always accurate- 
PLAYBOY: Why are so many top comedians 
and comedy writers Jewish? 

BROOKS: When the tall, blond Teuton 
have been nipping at your heels for 
thousands of усиз, you find it enervat- 
ing to keep wailing, $o you make jokes. 


If your enemy is laughing, how can he 
bludgeon you to death? 


tested TV comedy. 
hero, farout satire, and so on—why 
so successful? 

BROOKS. I'd say bi 
antiher 


ке of a bumbling 


Гаг-ош satire, and so on. 
What do you mean by 


BROOKS: What do уон mean by 
оп”? 

PLAYBOY: Well, we meant (аг the public 
could identify with, eel superior 
to, а nitwit like Maxwell Smart. 
BROOKS: That's what / meant. 

PLAYBOY: How does a clod Smart 
differ from the bird-brained protagonists 


in situation comedies such as Ozzie and 
Harriet? 

BROOKS: Guys like Ozzie Nelson arc lov- 
able boobs. Theres nothing lovable 
about Don Adams Max art. He 


dangerously carnest nitwit who deals 
monumental goofs. He doesn't trip over 
skates; he loses whole countries to the 
Communists. 

PLAYEOY: And standard situation. come 
dies, on the other hand, deal with dull 
people in репу situations? 

BROOKS: Right. And in their supposedly 
tructolife little episodes, they avoid 
anything approaching reality. For ycars 
I've always wanted to sec an honest fam- 
y TV scrics—maybe something called 
Half of Father Knows Best. The other 
m was paralyzed by a stroke in 
n he suspected we might lose 


PLAYBOY: In Get Smari you're obviously 
not striving for realism 

BROOKS: ОГ course not. We're doing 4 
comic strip. Smart is a dedicated boob 
whose heart is in the right place, but 


whose brains are im his shoes. We don't 
pretend that Smart himself or the sita. 
tion he’s involved plausible. Des che 


lest kind of satire, It succeeds be 
cause it's bright, witty, refreshing—and 
lucky chough to be on opposite low- 
rated. shows. 

PLAYBOY: Did you have any trouble sell 
ing the series 10 NB 
BROOKS: Plenty. ABC put up the origi 
nal money to develop the thing, but 
when we took them our first script, they 
thought it was too wild. They wanted 
so 


ething more "warm and lovable 
PLAYBOY: What did they m 
and lovable"? 

BROOKS: Who knows? Maybe a nice moth- 
er ina print dress, with undulant fever. 
PLAYBOY: Did you make changes for them? 
BROOKS: Ves, we figured we'd try to make 
them happy. So we threw in a dog. But 
they didn't like it. 

PLAYBOY: Why not? 

BROOKS: The dog was asthmatic. 
PLAYBOY: Why did they object to that? 


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BROOKS: Т suppose they felt we might 
oflend some important dogs 

PLAYBOY: Do you think Get Smart will 
spawn witrier comedy series in the future 
BROOKS: There's certainly audience 
for them. Somewhere between those who 
sop up the gelatinous, brain-scramblin 
nonsense of Peitivoat Junction and the 
nicllectuals who catch Basic Hungarian 
at SIX А.М. is a vast segment of the popu. 
lation that wants intelligent entertain 
ment. Without morals. 

PLAYBOY: You mean the public wants 
amoral TV? 

BROOKS: No, І mean they want TV with 
out little sermons. For years The Danny 
Thomas Show was doing the Ten Com. 
anandments, Every episode had a little 
message ro deliver: Don't lie, don't kill 
your neighbor, don't covet your neigh- 
bor's wife, don't uncovet your neighbor's 
wile . 

PLAYBOY: Living in New York, with a hit 
TV show being filmed on the Coast, you 
must be doing a lot of traveling these 
days 

BROOKS: I spend a lot of time in L. A. on 
business, but I also travel for pleasure. I 
just got back from Europe. 

PLAYBOY: How did you like it? 

BROOKS: | love it. Europe is very near 
and dear to my heart. Would you like to 
see а picture of i 

PLAYBOY: You Gury a picuine of Europe? 
BROOKS: Sure, right here in my wallet. 
Here it i 

PLAYBOY: It’s very nice, 

BROOKS: Of course, Europe was а lot 
younger then. It’s really not a very good 
picture. Europe looks much better in 
person, 

PLAYBOY: It's a Пис looking continent. 
BROOKS: I1 gives me а good deal of pleas. 
ure, but it's always fighting, fighting. 1 
tell you, I'll be so happy when it finally 
setiles down and gets married 
PLAYBOY: So will wc. Mel, most celebrities 
are asked questions like, “Where do you 
get your ideas"; “Are you as funny oll 
stage as you are on?" and so on. What 
question, asked of you by the public, 
bugs you the most? 

BROOKS: The one you just asked. 

PLAYBOY: Any others? 

BROOKS: "How's your beautiful wife?” 
PLAYBOY: How do you answer it? 
BROOKS: I say, "Haven't you heard? Her 
nose fell off.” 

PLAYBOY: Your wife, Anne Bancrolt, is 
certainly beautiful, and a very talented 
actress as well, She's also very successful. 
Tell us akly, Mel. is she making more 
moncy than you? 

BROOKS: Right at this moment she is. 
She's not sitting for free interviews. 
PLAYBOY: You sure know how to hurt a 
guy. Were you this salty with your ex- 
partner, Carl. Reiner? 

BROOKS: Salticr and peppier. 

PLAYBOY: What kind of a guy is Carl? 


BROOKS: Haven't you heard? His nose fell 
off 

PLAYBOY: What's he like apart from that? 
BROOKS. Carl Reiner is rci 
old woman who worked in a cunning 
factory in Alaska, canı 
only the legs. Well. one day Carl was 
fired for singing Arabic hymis and 

PLAYBOY: Thank vou. Belore the inter 
view started, we were discussing with you 
some of the funniest bits you've done 
with Carl. We wanted to quote from 


ly a 13-year 


ig king crabs 


some of them here, but. unfortunately. 
they just don't come off in print, with 
out the Jewish accent. Do you think it 
would work if we printed your lines in 
Hebrew? 

BROOKS: | doubi it. li might confuse your 
readers to see at the bottom of page 67 
the words “continued on page 66." 
PLAYBOY: Mel, theres а rumor going 
around that you invented the popular 
expression "pussycat" on one ol your 


records, 

BROOKS: I didn't invent it. [Us an old 
Jewish-American expression. When any- 
one was dear and sweet, they would call 
him а pussycat. But I think I was the 
first one to use it in show business. In 
our first. 2000-усағоі тап record, Carl 
asked me if 1 knew Shakespeare. Í said. 
“What a pussycat he was! What a cute 
beard!” 


PLAYBOY: Have you thought up new 
expression to replace “pussycat 
BROOKS: Yes. I have. “Water rat." "Look 


at him. What nice water rat!" You 
know somethi: 
as “pussycat.” 
PLAYBOY: You're right. Can you think of 
any other funny expressions? 

BROOKS: “Confusion to the French, 
PLAYBOY: What the hell is that? 
BROOKS: li was a toast that 
Hornblower used aboard his flagship. 
H's always been one of my favorites 
Good old Horatio! What a water rat. 
PLAYBOY: hat still doesn't make it 
BROOKS: | guess nor 

PLAYBOY: [11 1962 you wrore the book for 
a Broadway musical called AM American 
What happened to it? 

BROOKS: We had an unfortunare stroke 
of luck, It opened in New York when 
there was no newspaper strike. 
PLAYBOY: The critics didn't like it? 
BROOKS: Nobody liked it. The script was 
adapted from a book by Robert Lewis 
Taylor. It was about a European immi 
ant with a dream im his heart A 
drewm—it should have been an attack. 
PLAYBOY: We disenchanted 
with Broadway 

BROOKS: Not really, but I learned. some 
thing, and PH offer it free of charge to 
all would-be playwrights: Be very Guetul 
about selecting your director. Once he 
takes over, you've got nothing to say 
The Dramatists Guild, your mother, 


It doesn't work as well 


Horatio 


ther you 


No.1 r 


The Buckingham Corporation, Importers « New York, N.Y. + Distilled and Bottled in Scotland = Blended 86 Proof 


79 


PLAYBOY 


your аши Sadie and God can't help you. 
The director is the king —and in many 
cases, the. queen. 

PLAYBOY: Would you like to be a director 
yourself? 

BROOKS; Ul love to be onc 


I think Га be 


a great comedy director. As a maner of 
fact, 1 have just finished a screenplay 
called Marriage Is a Dirty, Rollen 


Fraud. Vd like very much to direct it. 
PLAYBOY: Is it based 
experience? 
BROOKS: No, it's based on а very 
tant conversation I overheard 
while waiting lor bus at the 
Hotel termina: 

PLAYBOY: What are the chances of a stu- 
dio assigning you to direct it? 

BROOKS: Very. very good. Well, let me 
amend that slightly: None 

PLAYBOY: What else are you working on? 
BROOKS: Springtime far Hitler, 

PLAYBOY: You're putting us on, 

BROOKS: No. it's the God's honest truth. 
Ts going to be a play within a play, or 
play within a film—I haven't decided yet 
Its a romp with Adolf and Eva at Berch- 
tesguden. There was a whole nice side 
of Hitler. He was а good d 
knows that. He loved a parakeet named 
Bob—no one knows that either. Its all 
brought out in the play 

PLAYBOY: Enough of Hider. Tell us how 
“The Mel Brooks Story" began. 
BROOKS: | was the baby in the family. My 
jeb was to keep everybody amused and 
арру. and I was always content to be 
the family down. 

PLAYBOY: Whitt did you think you'd be 
when you grew older? 


11 your OWI persoi 


npor- 
once 
Dixie 


cerno one 


PLAYBOY: You didn't make it, did you? 
BROOKS: What do you mean? Fm five- 


seven. My three brothers are all shorter 
than Pam. At family reunions they call 
me “Stretch.” 


PLAYBOY; What was the first funny thing 
you ever 
BROOKS: 

tion 
wi 


icutenant 
10 my wife wei 
forced to deal 
manners 
PLAYBOY: That's preety funny. 
recall to whom you said that? 
BROOKS: Very vividly. H 


Faversham's. atten- 
of such a nature J 
leson in 


him à 


pimi ich Express. 
PLAYBOY: What wi tion to (he 
remark? 


BROOKS: She immediately got up and gave 
me her seat. 

PLAYBOY; Many comics comedy 
writers seldom laugh at other people's 


and 


material, How about you? 
BROOKS: It's very hard 10 get me to laugh 
comic. What I want is something 

But how can 1 verbalize 


is really funn Now. 
Harry Ritz of the Ritz Brothers—ther 


somcone who makes me 
is the father of. modern 
comedy. He sired Caesar, Berle, Lewis 
all of them. Jonathan Winters is another 
guy who can break me up. 
PLAYBOY: But he's a gentile. 

I dove gentiles. In 
favorite activities is 


лад. To me he 
American visual 


fact, one 
Protestant 


of my 
spotting. 
PLAYEOY: How do you do that? 

BROOKS: It's not difficult. First you look 


for a family, the members of which ad- 
dress cach other as "Mother" and “Dad. 
What I mean is, the father calls the 
mother “Mothe and the mother calls 
the father "Dad." Not just the kids. 
PLAYBOY: Are they casy to spot? 
BROOKS: Oh ves. they're always in a white 
Ford station wagon filled with hundreds 
rs of mayonnaise and tons of white 
y s that guy that just 
walked into the room with a camera? 
PLAYBOY: Thats one of our photogra 
phers. He's going to take a few shots of 
you to run with the interview. 
BROOKS: Should 1 undress? 
PLAYBOY: I's not for the gatefold, Mel. 
You'll be shot fully dressed. But while 
мете on the subject, do you think 
there's a sexual revolution. goi 
this country? 
BROOKS. Yes. I do think there's a sexual 
revolution going on, and 1 think th 
with our current foreign policy. we'll 
probably be sending troops in there any 
minute to break ú up. 
PLAYBOY: In wherc? 
BROOKS: How do I know? We always send. 
in troops when there's a revolution. 
PLAYBOY: We hate to get personal. but, 
ng of sex, why haven't you asked 
troduce you to a Playmate or а 


Bunny? 
BROOKS. "hrec reasons: 
1 would be beneath my dignity 


It would be im- 


they're too openly sexy and clean-cut. 
I've been taught ever since I was a kid 
that sex ds filthy and forbidd and 


that's the way 1 think it should be, The 
filthier and more forbidden it is, the 


mor 
PLAYBO 
us an exa 


citing it i 
By those criteria, can you give 
nple of someone you consider 


sexy? 
BROOKS: To me anyone is sexy if they're 
not obvious about it. À 7l-year-old man in 


a fur coeli ously 
sexy under the right ci ces 
PLAYBOY: What would be the right 


circumstances? 
BROOKS: Well. if you're in the moonlight, 
if you're by a lazy lagoon—and if you're 
a 71-year-old woman in a fur collar and 
spits 

PLAYBOY: People who ki 
you're often. brash, rude and brutally 
direct. Are they right? 


ow you sav that 


BROOKS: That's not true, 
PLAYBOY: Sorry about th 
never mention it again. 
BROOKS: Please do or HI kill you, 
PLAYBOY: Aha! 

BROOKS: All right, | ат often brash, rude 
and brutally direct. Someday I'm going 
to dic and I don't have time ло toe-dance 
around the periphery of hatred. 
PLAYBOY: Is it true that you're always on? 
BROOKS: No, I'm only on when the 
people Fm with are worth it. If they're 
superperceptive. Or if they're just good 
PLAYBOY: Which would you rather do— 
perform or write? 

BROOKS: Performing is casier. Writing is 
more durable. 

PLAYBOY: We usually wind up our int 
views with a question like this onc 
What do you think will prove to be the 
most important legacy of our age 
BROOKS: Carl Reiner once asked me a 
similar question on one of our records 
and in jocular fashion | said, Saran 
Wrap. But Гуе become a lot more ma 
шге since then. I suppose Tve also 
grown with the times. 

PLAYBOY: So now what do you think will 
prove to be the most important legacy of 
our age? 

BROOKS: Glad Bags. 

PLAYBOY: One last question, Mel: We un 
derstand you're living iu a fairly old but 
comfortable New York town house 
BROOKS: That's right. Would you like to 
зе a picture of iG Te docurt look any 
thing like Europe. 

PLAYBOY: Maybe some other time. Our 
question is: How do you fecl about ur 
ban renewal and the destruction ol 
beautiful old buiklings and landmarks? 
BROOKS: The way 1 scc it, progress is 
progress. The old has to make way for 
the new. I understand there's a renewal 
bill for people up in Congress right now 
PLAYBOY: People? 

BROOKS: Yes, they want to establish а new 
Federal agency called, 1 believe, the De- 
partment of People Renewal. Agents 
from the depariment would be assigned 
to walk through the strecis of our cities 
inspecting old people. Those that look 
ticularly tired and useless will have 
Condemned” signs hung around their 
necks. The signs will say something like 
“This person is being demolished to 
make way for a modern, new baby." 
PLAYBOY: Í sounds rather heartless— 
tearing down an old person like th. 
BROOKS: Well. they won't tear him down 
immediately. He'll B ише to seule 
his he'll have to 


Mel. We'll 


PLAYBOY: Well, Mel, thanks very much 
for taking the time to talk to us 
BROOKS: | would have been much hap- 
voting. 


WHAT SORT OF MAN READS PLAYBOY? 


A young man enjoying the good years, the PLAYBOY reader seeks the superlative—in a fine din- 
ner wine or a fair dinner date. And his resources permit him to pour for pleasure more often than 
most, Facts: More than 3,600,000 adult males who read PLAYBOY drink wine. 2,700,000 regularly 
dials or liqueurs. There's quite a lot to be said for this man. An increasing number of alco- 
erage advertisers are finding it out—in PLAYBOY. (Source: 1965 Brand Rating Index.) 


New York + Chicago + Detroit + Los Angeles + San Francisco + Atlanta + London 


The Wan 
Ou The n 
Rorschach Shirt . 


FICTION BY RAY BRADBURY Ai 


he had been gandhi, moses, 4 
christ, buddha and freud- Д 
a giant in his field-—_ 

until that day «9 
when опе word f4 
made him Z 
abandon his jy 
psychiatric EE 
office АЙ 
forever IB 


SCULPTURE BY PAUL DAVIS 


YAUAGAA YAA YA VIOITOIA 


exom Athens, sss bod od 

-hns baw ndbhad azrio 
АУ, 2î мї toss, 9 

EC» чуубу is Mess 

Б улоо эко NIAo 

E wi shost 

mh ai sobımn 

B aided 

E) sio 


wuse. 


аула JUAS YB зяитяшузг 


B.. AW. 


What a name! 
Listen to it bark, growl, yip, hear the bold proclamation of: 
Immanuel Brokaw! 

A fine name for the greatest psychiatrist who ever tread the 

ence without capsizing 

Toss a pepperground Freud casebook in the air and all students sneezed: 
Brokaw! 
Whatever 
One day, like 


ppened to him? 
high-class vaudeville act, he vanished. 

With the spotlight out, his miracles seemed in danger of reversal. Psychotic 
rabbits threatened to leap k into hats. Smokes were sucked back into 
loud-powder gun muzzles. We all waited, 

Silence lor ten years. And more silence. 

Brokaw was lost, as if he had thrown nself with shouts of laughter into 
mid-Atlantic, For what? To plumb for Moby Dick? To psychoanalyze that 
colorless fiend and see what he really had against Mad Ahab? 

Who knows? 

1 last saw him running for a twilight plane, his wife and six Pomeranian 
dogs yapping far behind him on the dusky feld. 

»oodbye forever! 

His happy cry seemed a joke. But 1 found men flaking his gold-leal name 
from his office door next day, as his great [atwomen couches were hustled 
out into the raw weather toward some Third Avenue auction. 

So the giant who had been Gandhi-Moses-Christ-Buddha-Fread all layered 
in one incredible Armenian dessert had dropped through a hole in the clouds. ‘To die? To live in secret? 

Теп уса er I rode on a California bus along the lovely shores of Newport. 

The bus stopped. A man in his 70s bounced on, jingling silver into the coin box like manna. I glanced up 
from the r of the bus 

“Brokaw! By the Saints!” 

And with or without si 
cal, erudite, merry, accepting, lorgiv 

Immanuel Brokaw, 

But not in a dark si no. 

Instead, as if they were vestments of some proud new church, he wore: 

Bermuda shorts. Blackteather Mexican sandals. A Los Angeles Dodgers’ baseball cap. French su 

The shirt! Ah, God! The shirt! 

A wild thing, all lush creeper and live flytrap undergrowth 
and crammed at every interstice and crosshatch with mythological | 

Open at the neck, this vast shirt hung wind-whipped like a thousand Hags Irom a parade of united but neu- 
rotic nation: 

But now, Dr. Brokaw tilted his baseball cap, 
down the aisle, he wheeled, he paused, he whispered, now to this man, this won 

1 was about to cry out when 1 heard him say: 

“Well. what do you make of i 

А small boy, stunned by the circus poster ellect of the old man's attire, blinked. The old man nudge 

"My shirt, boy! What do you see 

Horses! Dancing horses!" 

"Bravo!" Ehe doctor beamed, patted him and strode оп. “And you, sir? 

A young man, quite taken with the forthrightness of this invader from some summer world, said 

"Why . . . clouds, of course.” 

“Cumulus or nimbus?" 

“Er... not storm clouds, no, no. Fleecy, sheep cloud 


€ God manilest, bearded, benevolent, ponti 
ad eternal 


on, there he stood. Reared up 
ш, messianic, tutorial, forever 


glasses. And... 


1 Pop-Op dilation and contraction, full flowered 
ts and symbols! 


ted his French sunglasses to survey the bus seats. Striding slowly 
n, that child. 


The psychianist plunged oi 
“Mademoisell 
"Surfers!" A teenage girl stared. “There're the waves, b 
And so it went, on down the length of the bus. and as the great m 

laughter sprang up. then, grown infectious, turned to roars of hilarity. By now 


g4 the first responses and so fell in with the game. This woman saw skyscrapers! The docto 


ones. Surfboards. Supe 
n progressed a few scraps and titters of 
a dozen. passengers had heard 
(continued on page 92) 


date's affectionate, too! 


“Yes, Phil, your 


86 


feo SRargret as Art 


it's "look, ma, i'm a paintbrush!” as the sexy first-name film star romps 
among the avant-garde in a colorfully kookie scene for her latest movie 


A “SWINGER,” says Webster's, in typically laconic fashion, is "one that swings." Cast in the tile role of Paramount's 


forthcoming cinecomedy The Swinger, provocative Ann-Margret plays the part of a would-be writer whose sextraor 
dinary autobiographical prose prompts a prospective publisher to ask repeatedly: Does she or doesn't she? Rather 
than admit that her lusty lile's story is nothing more than a plagiarized puton when leading man Tony Franciosa and 


his publisher boss Robert Coote start spying on her in an eflort to establish her editor 


1 integrity, she opts to stage a 
series of sexy shenanigans befitting the wildest of birds. The high point of The Swinger's subsequent high jinks has 
been preserved in this portfolio, wherein our bogus literary bawd and a coterie of bohemian tenants, who help her 


urel Canyon, join forces in fabricating an orgiastic voodoo rite [or the benefit 


pay the rent on her hillside home in 1 
of her two skeptical shadows, who have stationed themselves outside a basement window. As the proce 


lings approach 
pandemonium, Ann-Margret dofis her duds in favor of a coat of paint and turns into a human paintbrush, writh- 


ing her way across a blank canvas in a Technicolor toast to the doityourself tradition. Best known for her ingénue 


portrayals in State Fair and Bye Bye Birdie and, more recently, her starring roles as hard-boiled heroines in The Cin 
cinnati Kid and Stagecoach, Ann-Margret takes to her celluloid unveiling in Swinger with the artistic ease of a truc 
cinema sex kitten. The aesthetic values of painting with pulchritude alone arc, of course, open to debate. Our own 


reaction reflects that hoary cliché: We may not know art—-but we know what we like. And we like Ann-Margret 


In one of Hollywood's more bizarre scenes to dole, braided Ann-Margret poses os a voodoo priestess under the spell of o Bectle-topped buddy 
(obove) who lights her моу to The Swinger's far-out version of о beatnik artists’ boll. Right: Removing her robes, Ann-Morgret’s ortful cronies 
cover her unfettered frome with severo] layers of point, then tote in o supersized convos otop which the multihued miss is destined to serve 
her sorceress’ apprenticeship os the prettiest of paintbrushes. For right: Things ore temporarily up in the oir as the heovily onointed leading 
lady puis up o good front while being hoisted aloft by one of her hipster henchmen ond given o lift to her first ort-by-onolomy session. 


PHOTOCRAPHY RY MEL TRANEL 


Ann-Margret learns ta appreciate on artist's ups and downs os her 
corpus delectable is repeatedly lowered to the convos (above) 


ta provide o suitably abstract pattern. The worm turns o moment 
loter when the well-oiled beauty slips away for o fast solo ond 
tries out а few brush strokes of her awn (below). Right: Using her 
hair os o handle, o leapardskinned lod whips Ann-Margret to 
and fro in а move colculored to moinroin the frenetic flavor. of 
milody's masterpiece. Bugged ot having her broid pulled, the sex 
kitten temporarily turns tigress and menaces her arty accomplices 
before succumbing to their superior numbers and furnishing film 
goers with o colorful scene-ending display of dervish delight. 


P ] Wwe. ёе „у 
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PLAYBO 


92 


Wau 9u The Rorschach Shirt 


winked. That saw crossword pui 
des. The doctor shook his hand. This 
child found zebras all optical illusion on 


woman gue Adams and misty Eves 
being driv hallseen Gardens 
The doctor scooched in on the seat with 
her awhile; they talked in herce whis 
pered clations, then up he jumped and 
forged on. Had the old woman seen an 
vietion? This young one 
Couple invited back in! 
Dogs. lightnings, c 
clouds, man-eating tiger lilies 
Each person, cach response, brought 
outcries. We found ourselves all 
nz together. This fine old man 
was а happening of nature, a caprice, 
God's rambunctious will, sewing all our 
separateness up in one 
Elephants! Elevators! Alarums! Doom 
Each answer seemed funnier than the 
previous, and no one shouted louder his 
great torrents of daughter than this 
grand tall and marvelous physician who 
sked for, got. and cured us of our hair 
balls on the spot. Whales. Grass mead- 
cities. Beauteous women. He 
He wheeled, He flapped his 
idly colored shirt. He towered before 


mushroom 


c 


ir, what do you find? 

"Why, Dr. Brokaw, of course!” 

The old man’s laughter stopped as if 
he were shot. He seized my shoulders as 
to wrench me into focus. 
“Simon Wincelaus, is that you! 
"Me, me!" I laughed. "Good gricf, 
doctor, | thought you were dead years 
go. What's this youre up to? 

“Up to?" He squeczed and shook my 
nds. Then he snorted a great sell- 


hi 


forgiving laugh as he gazed down along 
the acreage of ridiculous shirting. “Up 
to? Retired. Swiftly gone.” His pepper- 


mint breath warmed my face. “And now 
bes known hereabouts as . . . listen! 
.. the Man in the Rorschach Shirt.” 

"In the what” I cried. 

"Rorschach. Shirt 

Light as a carnival gas balloon 
touched into the seat beside me, 

We rode along by the blue sea under a 
ghi summer sky. 

The doctor gazed ahead, as if readi 
my thoughts in a vast skywri 
the clouds. 

“Why, you ask, why? I see your face, 
started, at the airport years ago. My 
ing Away Forever day. My plane 
should have been named the Happy Ti 
nto the trace- 


he 


B 


ng among 


tanic. On it Т sank forever 
less sky. Yet here 1 am in the absolute 
lesh, ves? Not drunk, nor mad, nor 
riven by age and retirements boredoi 
Where. whi how come?” 


"Yes," J said, “why did you retire, with 
everything pitched for you? Skill, reputa- 


tion, money. Not a breath of — " 


(continued from page 81) 
“Scandal? None! Why, then? Because, 
this old camel had mot one but two 
humps broken by iwa saws. Two 
amazing straws. Hump number опе" 

The bus hummed softly on the road. 
voice rose and fell with the hum. 
‘ou know my photographic memory? 
Blessed d. with total recall. Any- 
thing said. seen, done, touched, hcard, 
an be snapped back to focus by me, for- 
ty. fifty. sixty years later. All, all of i 
trapped in here.” 

He stroked his temples light 

“Hundreds of psychiatric cases, deliv. 
cred through my door, year on year. And 
never once did 1 check my notes on any 
of those sessions. | found. carly on, I 
need only play back what 1 had heard 
inside my head. Sound tapes were kept as 
a double check, but never listened to. 
There you have the stage set for thc 
whole shocking. business. 

"One day in my sixtieth year a won 
patient spoke a single word. I asked her 
to repeat it. Why? Suddenly 1 had felt 
my semicircular canals shift as if some 
valves had opened upon cool fresh air at 

subterranean level. 

“Best.” she said. 
"1 thought you said “beast"* T 


aid. 


“Oh, no, doctor, “best.” * 
"One word. One pebble dropped off 

the edge. And then—the avalanche. Fi 
i d her с 


distinctly, 1 had h 
loved the beast in me, 
пе of sexual hsh, eh? When in reali 
had said. “He loved the best in me.” 
ich is quite another pan of cold cod, 
you must agree. 

"That night I could not sleep. Му 
ars felt strangely clear, as if 1 had just 
gotten over a thirty-year cold. I suspected 
myself, my past, my senses, so at three i 
the deadfall morning | motored to my 


wi 


olhce and found the worst: 
“The recalled conversations of hu 
dreds of cases in my mind were not the 


same as those recorded on my tapes or 
typed out in my secretaries notes! 
“You mean... ? 


one had said head. Sleep was creep. Lay 
was day. Paws was really pause. Rump 
was merely jump. Fiend was only leaned 
Sex was hex or mix or, God knows, per- 
plex! Yes—mess. No—slow. Binge— 
hinge. Wrong—long. Side—hide. Name 
name, I'd heard it wrong. Ten million 
dozen misheard nouns! 1 panicked 
through my files! Great Jumping Josie! 
“АП those people! Holy Moses, Bro- 
aw, I cried, all these years down from 
the Mount, the Word of God like a flea 
in your саг. And now, kue in the day. 
think 10 consult your lightning 
And find your Laws, 


n dark, unraveling my despair. 1 trained. 
to Far Rockaway. perhaps because of its 
lamenting name. 

1 walked by a tumult of waves only 
equaled by the tumult in my breast 
How, Т cried. can you have be 
deaf for a lifetime and known 
it? And known it only now when. 
through some fluke, the sense, the gilt, 
returned, how, how?! 

My only answer was a gr 
nderwave upon the sa 

"So much for миз 
broke hump number one of this odd- 
shaped human. camel 

The bus moved along the golden shore 
road, through a gentle breeze. 
Straw number two" | asked, qı 
at last 

Dr. Brokaw held his French sunglasses 
up so sunlight struck fish gliuers all 
about the cavern of the bus 

"Sight. Vision. Texture. Detail. Aren't 
they miraculous. Awful in the sense of 
meaning true awe? What is sight. vision. 


not 


t stroke of 


ds. 
mber one that 


к, 


ally want to see thc 
Oh, yes," 1 cried, promptly. 
"A young man's unthinking answer. 


No, my dear boy, we do not. At twenty, 
yes, we think we wish (o sce, know, be 
all. So thought I once. But 1 have had 
weak eyes most of my life, spent half my 
days being fitted out with new specs by 
oculists. see? Well. came the dawn of 
the corneal lens! At last, I decided, I 
will fii myself. with those bright litte 
teardrop miracles. those invisible disks! 
ncidence? Psychosomatic cause and 
? For that same week I got my соп 
tact lenses was the week my hearing 
cleaved up! There must be some physio- 
mental connection, but doi 
into an informed guess. 
“ANH I know is T had my little crystal 
comeal ground and installed 
my byblue eyes and— 


"t hazard me 


lenses 
weak. 


upon 


here was the world! 
"There were people 
“And there. God 
multitudinous pores upon the pe 
"Simon," he added, grieving genih 
eyes shut for a moment behind his dark 
glasses, "have you ever thought, did vo 
know, that people are for the most part 


save u 


pores?" 

“Pores” 1 said. 

“Pores! A million. ten billion 
pores. Everywhere and on everyone. 
People crowding buses, theaters. tele 
phone booths, all pore and little sul 


stance. Small. pores on tiny women. Big 
pores on monster men, Pores as nui "s 
as that foul dust which slides репе 
down church-nave sunbeams late after 
res. | stared at fine ladies com 
plexions, not their eyes, mouths or ear 
lobes. Shouldn't а man watch à woman's 
skeleton hinge and unhinge itself withi 

(continued on page 210) 


noons. I 


A WOMAN FOR TITUS 


the girl had cost the master $1200, but the slave had paid for her with his own life 
fiction By HUGH NISSENSON 


January 19, 1856 
My dear cousin Lyle, 

Well, it's all over. Titus was publicly hanged this morning in the courtyard behind the city jail. The law is the 
law, and these examples must be made for the protection ol the white population, but in a way, I'm sorry. He was a 
superb manservant. quite the best in town, and in addition to everything, Nonny is going to have his baby. ‘The doc 
herself for spite, so 1 


tor confirmed it yesterday, but she's obviously a born troublemaker, entirely са 
shall be forced to sell her off. 


Still and all, Em lucky. 1 shudder to think what might have happened. Titus came (continued on page 102) 


93 


PLAYBOY 


“You see, dear, the golf bet I lost to Jack didn't 
have anything to do with money . .. 17 


article By AN ANONYMOUS INVESTOR the chilling report of an amateur speculator 
who painstakingly followed the book—and blew a small fortune in the big bull market 


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1 SUPPOSE 1 SHOULD PRETEND that I'm writing this account to help others avoid the mistakes 1 made 
in the stock market. 1 am not that altruistic. The real reason is that 1 no longer w 
to myself that I was a victim of circumstances. I w 


ant to pretend 
a victim of my own stupidity and cupidity, 
and 1 want to be faced with all of the facts of my undoing. The only way I can. prevent it from 
happening again is by writing down exactly what happened, step by step. If others find instruc- 
tion in it, well and good. 1 made just about every mistake the novice in the market is likely to 
commit. And I lost à great deal of money 
is a great deal of money? What is a fortune? To a $75-aweek clerk, $5000 is а fortune. 
For a millionaire, to lose $100,000, while no pleasure, would be no calamity. 1 carn an upper- 
middle-class income, but 1 have no millions to fall back on. The sum I lost was between 550.000 
and $100,000, That is certainly a fortune to me—and to most people 

H took about six and a half years for me to lose my money—{rom the fall of 1957 to the spring 
of 1961. During that time the Dow-Jones Industrial Average rose from 485 


890—2 gain of about 
70 percent. True, some of my biggest losses occurred during the "crash" of 1962. but I lost equally 
luge amounts in sharply rising markets. Folly wanscends all market conditions. 

1 first invested in the stock market at the age of 30. A [ew years before. 
died and left me some cash, an insurance policy and a piece ol 


n 1954, my father had 
come property. I suddenly, there- 
fore, possessed capital that I did not need for day-to-day living and. at my family's suggestion, Lin 
vested it all in mutual funds. Ht was the first time that I even knew there were mutual funds. 

Since 1945, n ver invested in the stock market had become interested in 
Wall Sucen The market was rising, big money was being made. People with a little savings were 
getting hot tips and tripling their investments in a few months’ time. The market was beginning 
to look like a oneway street to riches for all. A cousin of mine asked if 1 had any money in the 
market. When T answered in the negative, except for my mutual funds, he suggested 1 talk to 
his broker, а man my own age who was originally Irom the same Midwestern city where much ol my 
own family lived, who had gone to the same college 1 had, and whom I ma 
not remember. I called him. 


ny people who had 


y have known but could 


He came over one Sunday afternoon, sat in our living room and talked to my wife and me 
most amiably, conservatively and sensibly, He asked us about our income and our insurance, He 


95 


PLAYBOY 


96 


suggested that 1 always keep at least 
53000 in the bank for any emergencies— 
and at that time I believe 1 did have that 
much in cash, or very near it. My wife 
was working, too, and as yet we had no 
children. If there nything left over, 
the market, though uncertain, was а 
pretty good way 10 realize a gain supe 
to what the savings bank could pay. Care- 
ful investments, he said, should realize 
bout 15 percent a y his was better, 
too, than what most mutual funds could 
accomplish. He also urged me to sell my 
war bonds—bought as a boy in high 
school when I worked in the summer—to 
place the money where it could carn a 
better return. All that he said sounded 
reasonable and businesslike, and I decid- 


ed to try it. I sold the mutual funds and 
bonds and sent a check to his office. 
Since I knew nothing about the mar- 


ket, it was agreed that he would handle 
the whole thing for mc—a discretionary 
account, as it is called. He needn't even 
tell me when he bought or sold securi- 
tics; 1 would get slips from his office. 

Another friend who had long been in- 
vesting suggested that | buy a little loose- 
leaf notebook at the tenent store and 
keep track of my stocks—to chart the 
progress of each by writing down its 
price at the end of every week. 1 bought 
my notebook. 

My first entry in that book is Ameri- 
can Home Products, 22 shares bought 
October 14, 1957, at a price of 13134 a 
share, for a total cost, with commissions, 
of 52920.55. On October 18. the stock 
was 13354. On October 25, 13612. On 
November 1, 14014. On November 8, 
IH. On November 15. 148. On Novem- 
ber 99, 15314. On November 27. my 
broker sold the stock for $152 a share. In 
a iule over a month, without having to 
do a thing, | had made a profit of 
$301.83! I was delighted. This seemed 
10 be the easiest thing in the world, and 
а very pleasant way to make money. 

My brokers next purchase was 100 
res of Socony Mobil Oil. He paid 
1614 for it, sold it less th: sb 
for 49, for a profit ol 57: 1 never 
even talked to him over the phone. I 
wouldn't learn the delightful news of 
profit until the mail arrived. 

I sold no other stock in 1957. Just the 
two complete transactions. My income- 
tax return that year listed a short-term 
from securities of 5614.02 

The following year was a busy one for 
my broker I just watched from the side 
lines, delighted. Fifty shares of General 
Electric, bought in 1957 for 5934, were 
sold for 6 January 1958. for a 
profit of $109.79. Ten shares of IBM, 
bought at 28714, sold a few months 
at 304, for a profit of $145.83. Seventy 
five shares of Florida Power Corpor: 
bought for 52, sold two months 
lor 5814, for a profit of 5397.60. One 
hundred shares of Mead Johnson, 
bought for 4714, sold five weeks 


for a profit of 5566.61. One 
shares of Northern tural 
months 
later for 5834, for $649.83 profi. And 
many more—all profits. 1 took only one 
loss the whole year, and that for $289.73. 
‘The rest was pure gain, a тогай profit of 
about $4000. Since 1 had about 523,000 
in the market at that time, I had made 
about 18 percent, Even better than m 
broker had promised. Plus dividends of 
some $900. Clearly, investing in the stock 
market was a wonderfully casy way to 
make a great deal of топе) 

The following year. 1959, ran jus 
about as smoothly. "There were 2З tra 
actions in that year, and only five were 
losses, only one of them of any conse- 
quence. Some of the gains, on the other 
hand, were considerable. Washington 
Water Power, bought in July 1958, was 
sold in January 1959, for a profit of 
9062.77. Piper Aircraft, purchased in Oc- 
tober 1958, was sold in April 1959, for a 
profit of $1293.06. Electric Auto-Lite 
was bought in April and sold in No 
vember, for a profit of 5948.71. The year 
ended with a net profit of over $6000, 
plus over $1000 in dividends, but since 1 
had put several thousand dollars more 
into the market, my percentage return 
was about the same as the year before. 

I began to be dissatisfied. 

For one thing, 1 was now looking at 
the stock tables daily and reading the 
comments on the financial pages, and 1 
was beginning to wonder about my 
broker's policy of doing so much trading. 
Not that I was worried about short-term 
as against long-term profits, because 1 was 

п that high a лах bracket. What was 
y bothering me was that 1 saw th: 
my broker was moving in and out of 
stocks that had only begun their rise. 1f. 
he had stuck with the better purchase 
instead of trading, 1 would have made 
lerably more money. E made a list 
of all his transactions to date and checked 
on the price of every stock as it stood 
at the end of 1959. 

American Home Products, which I had 
been so happy to sell at 76 (after a two- 
for-one split) for a $391 profit, was now 
17114, and had been as high as 193 that 
year. IBM. wi 1 sold at 304, was 
now 13814, and had gone to 488 that 
vear. Mead. Johnson, which 1 had held 
for five weeks and sold at 53,2, was now. 
68, and had touched 8215. 1 was particu. 
larly bothered by American Moto 
which my broker had bought on. March 
20, 1959, at 31% and sold on April 1 at 
3534: it was one of the glamor stocks of 
the year, and hit 9674. 

I didn't know enough at the time to 
realize that one can seldom predict when 
a stock has hit its high; I didn't know 
often wisest to grab a profit 
while you have it. I did sec that a few of 
the stocks I had sold, at a profit, were 
now selling for less than 1 had. realized 
from them. Yet those few that had run 


hundred 
Gas, bought for 5034, sold thre 


away to glamorous highs exasperated 
me. If 1 had only put all my money in 
American Motors and left it there, 1 
ve tripled my investment. Why 
all this fitting around? Why not lind a 
good stock and seule in with it? 

1 began to read the stock pages more 
and more closely; and 1 began t0 read 
the ads that promised so much if onc 
only subscribed to a particular invest 
ment ser a to send in dollar 


services recommenda ding 
suggestions, which contradicted my deci 
sion that Jongterm holdings were 
but I was confused, inconsistent, and 
never really thought through the prob. 
Jem long enough and clearly enough to 
evolve any investment philosophy. AH 1 
knew that the recommendations 
sounded attractive and that 1 was dis 
tislied with my broker. 1 began to call 
him and make suggestions, then de 
mands. Whats more, even without my 
interference, in 1960 the market went 
down—and so did my broker's luck 


were tn 


was 


1 instigated the first serious trouble in 
my account. One of the services to which 
H now subscribi and onc h 
which 1 was particularly impressed spe 
Gialized in a consensus of all the other 
services. The favorite of this combined 
wisdom at the beginning of 1900 was 
American Motors. Momentum, it seems, 
had carried the glamor stock of the year 
before onto the favorite list for the cur 
rent year as well. How often, 1 learned 
later, analysts merely go along with 
vorites, sceing on their charts no ceiling 
to a rising curve, recommending. stocks 
just before they hit their peaks. But 1 
d instructed. my broker to 
y me 100 shares of American Motors. 
They cost me $29 a share (the stock 


had split since I had last owned it). 
Within days the shares went down to 
271, then 261%. My broker, disgusted 


with the outcome he expected from my 
first interference in my account, decided 
he would save my skin in spite of myself 
by averaging down and bailing 


But the stock 
ly tossed it out later in the year at just 
under 19, for a loss of almost $1900. 
That was the beginning. 

My next discovery of what 
like a sure success came from another 
service. E asked my broker to buy Brown. 
Со. on the American. Exch; - He was 
indifferent to the stock, but we bought 
200 shares. only to scramble out of it 
month later, as it was falling fast, for a 
loss of $698. 1 turned io still another 
service, one that specialized im science 
and electronic issues, then in their hey 
day. Т bought 100 shares of N: 
Company, an over-the-counter stock my 
broker had never heard of, and made a 

(continued on page 118) 


pounded 


Limericks 


a roguish gallery of favorite five-liners—old, new, borrowed and blue 


To his bride said the lynx-eyed detective, 
“Сап it be that my eyesight s defective? 
Has your east tit the least bit 
The best of your west tit, 
Or is it a trick of perspective?” 


There was a young fellow named Skinner 
Who took a young lady to dinner. 

They sat down to dine 

At a quarter past nine 
And at quarter past ten it was in her. 
(The dinner, not Skinner; 
Skinner was in her before dinner.) 


A hillbilly farmer named Hollis 

Used possums and snakes for his solace. 
The children had scales 
And prehensile tails 

And voted for Governor Wallace. 


At the orgy I humped twenty-two, 
And, man, was I glad to get through. 
A whole night of sexing 
Turns boring and vexing, 
But at orgies, what else can you do? 


A guru from eastern Tibet 

And this is the strangest one yet — 
Had a member so long, 
So pointed and strong 

He could skewer six yaks en brochette. 


There was a young girl from Dumfries 
Who said to her lover, “Oh, please, 
You would heighten my bliss 
Jf you played more with this, 
And paid less attention to these.” 


Possessed by the deuils of doom, 
He made love to a ghost in a tomb. 
He did it, they say, 
In the regular way— 
Under the sheets, I presume. 


The new cinematic emporium 

Ts not just a supersensorium, 
But a highly effectual 
Heterosexual 

Mutual masturbatorium. 


While befuddled with booze, Mr. Astor 
Made a pass at a statue of plaster; 

When informed of his error 

His mind filled with terror; 
“What a blessing,” he said, “Pm not faster.” 


A young woman got married al Chester; 
Her mother kissed her and blessed her, 
“This man thal you've won 
Should be just loads of fun. 


Since tea he's had me and your sister.” 


When Tom had a lady named Claire, 
He was the first one to ever get there. 
She said, “Copulation 
Can resull in gestation, 
But I swear, now you're there, I dont care!” 


Said a lassie on one of her larks, 

“IPs more fun indoors than in parks; 
You feel more at ease, 
Your ass doesn’t freeze, 

And strollers don’t make snide remarks!” 


The rosy-cheeked lass from Dunellen 
Whom the Hoboken rascals call Helen 
In her efforts to please 
Spread a social disease 
From New York to the Straits of Magellan. 


head 
Star 


ma 


bš 
B 


a discerning guide to good grooming that comes in small packages 


Suave aids that perk up the skin, enhance the hair. Clockwise from 12: Jean Noté ofter-shave, 8 ozs, by Jeon Naté, $2. International 
Club shave foam, 6 azs., by John Weitz, $3.50. Messire atter-shave, 4 azs., by Jeon D Albret, $5. Habit Rouge Capillaque hair spray, 4 ozs., 
by Guerlain, $3.50. Sandalwood after-shave, 6 ozs., by Arden for Men, $4. A Gentleman's after-shove, 4 ozs., by Chanel, $5. Aramis Shampoo: 
on-o-Rope, by Estée Louder, $3.50. Tenbark affer-shove, 6 azs., by Tanbork Lid, $425. Aramis Pick-up Mosk, a men’s astringent, 1 oz, by 

' Estée Lauder, $5. St. Jahns West Indian Lime ofter-shave, 8 ozs, and calogne, 4 ozs. (пої shawn), come packed in hand-waven basket, by West 
Indies Bay Company, $10.50. Laak Fit after-shave, tones up the complexion without staining, 11/2 ozs., by Powers Men's Collection, $5. Erilliantine 
hair preparation, 2 azs., by Arden, $2.50. Men's hair spray, 634 ozs, by Arden, $2. Black Watch shave latian, 6 ozs., by Prince Matcho- 
belli, $3. Jean Marie Farina offershave, 8 ozs, by Roger В Gallet, $é Persian Leather shave lation, 16 ozs, by Caswell-Massey, $16. 


99 


body 
boosters | 


a c 
ü gr 


ou | 
= 


Ablution solutions for sociable security. Clockwise from 12: Eau de toilette spray, 8 ozs; by Zizonie de Frogonord, $12. Sandalwood 
ecu de cologne in imported Italian bottle, 8 ozs, by Arden for Men, $15. British Sterling cologne, 4 ozs, by Speidel, $5. Habit Rouge eou de 
cologne spray, 4 ozs, by Guerlain, $5. Eou de Vetiver cologne, 16 ozs, by Corven, $13.50. Véritoble Impériole eau de cologne, 4 ozs., by 
Guerlain, $5. Eau de cologne, 16 ozs, by Hermès, $18. Talc deodorant spray, 6 ozs., by Powers Men's Collection, $3. International Club spray 
cologne, 2 ozs., $6, and cologne, 6 ozs., $10, both by John Weitz. Brilish Caribbean Island Surf all-purpose lotion, 4 ozs., by Robinson Bishop, 
$4. Sardoette pad, on aftershower moisturizer, comes in seporate envelope, $3 for box cf 25, and Sordo disperser-bottle bolh oil, 16 ozs., 
$8.50, both by Sordecu. Jean Noté cologne, 8 ozs., by Jean Naté, $2. Tonbork cologne, 6 ozs., by Tanbork Ltd., $5. Passport 360 spray de- 
100 odorant, З ozs., $2.50, and spray cologne, 3 ozs., $3.50, both by Von Heusen. Sandalwood eau de cologne body rub, 8 ozs., by Arden for Men, $B. 


`< 


From left to right: Spiral cologne, 8 ozs., by Alfred Dunhill of London, $5.25. Messire eau de cologne spray, 2/4 ozs, by Jeon D'Albret, $5. 
Vetiver all-purpose sproy, 4 ozs., by Guerlain, $5. Sondalwaod ecu de cologne in easy-grip imported Italion bottle, 11 azs., by Arden for Men, 
$12.50. Internationol Club soap, by John Weitz, $3. Aramis spray deodoront talc, 6 ozs., by Estée Lauder, $3.75. International Club talc, 2 
ozs., by John Weitz, $3.50. Monsieur Bolmain ecu de cologne, 4 ozs., by Revlon, $5. Sandalwood cou de cologne in plastic bottle, 4 ozs., by 
Arden for Men, $4. 4711 eau de cologne, 372 ozs., by Colonic, $3.50. Sandolwood bath essence, 13/4 ozs., by Arden for Men, $3. Black Lobel 
cologne, 31/4 ozs., by Yordley of London, $1.75. A Gentleman's cologne, 4 ozs., by Chonel, $5. Lotion Végétole Jicky, an aftershove or splash- 
on for after the both, 8 ozs., by Guerlain, $7.50. Savon pour l'homme glycerin soap, 3 ozs., by Zizanie de Frogonard, $3. Jeon Morie Farina. 
Еси de Cologne Royale in Napoleon-era boot flosk, 3 ozs, by Roger & Gallet, $4. On the torso: Jean Naté Soop-on-o-Rope, by Jeon Noté, $1.50. 101 


PLAYBOY 


102 


WOMAN FOR TITUS 


at me, you know, q 
was about to take my hat, and if it hadn't 
been Гог my ivory-handled walking stic 
— the one that belonged to Poppa—he 
would have strangled me on the spot. As 
it was, I was forced to hit him hard 
enough to break the bridge of his nose 
before the other servants were able to tie 
him up. What possessed him, I can't 
imagine. “Struck stark-raving mad" is 
Henry Mill's explanation, and I'm in- 
clined w agree, although if Titus had 
been one of Mill's mistreated feld 
hands, it'd be easier to understand 
Irs all completely bewildering. Sherifl 
Benson tells me that in the six weeks 
that Titus spent in jail, he didn't seem 
half as afraid of the rope as of eternal 
hellfire for what he'd done. Yet when 
the Reverend Dover—a close friend of 
Momma's for many years—was kind 
enough to offer him the consolation of 


te suddenly, as he 


religion, he refused, saying that even if 1 
ave 


Гот, him 


chich I do, if only for 
s sake—the crime he had com- 
mitted against himself was even worse, 
and best left to the judgment of Al 
mighty God! He mounted the scaflold 
quite calmly, stumbling on the top step 
because his fect were bound too tight 

I thank Cod that Momma didn't live 
to sec it. If you recall, Titus was origi 
nally hers. She bought him when he was 
15 or so from a dealer in New Orleans, 
and чайка him first as a houseboy and 
then, as J grew older, a personal servant 
to me. You could almost say that we 
grew up together. He was always as 
docile and polite as you could wish, but 
rather quiet. As with all of them, it was 
hard to say what he was thinking. 

He was never beaten, though; there 
was never any occasion for it. Poor 
Momma tried to give him at least the 
rudiments of a Christian education. 
Every Sunday the whole household staff 
was invited to take part in services with 
the family. We would gather in the par- 
lor, where Momma would play the or- 
gan, and Titus learned to lead us all in 
singing hymus. As a matter of fact, it 


g up. 
beautiful baritone. He 
loved to sing, sometimes with the tears 
streaming down his checks. Momma. of 
col was delighted: as a reward, if he 
did particularly well, she would allow 
him a cup of molasses to eat with a 
spoon 

"Am I a Christian, mistress?" he once 
ked her. 

If you believe in Our Lord Jesus, 
she said. 
1 do. I do." 

"Then you are.” 

“Then I got a soul, too?’ 

“Why, of course, Titus," she told him. 
“AIL human beings have souls." 


ye: 


(continued [rom page 93) 


He got down on his knees in front of 
the fireplace and kissed her hand. Once 
in a while, on a Sunday night, she would 
read to him from the New Testament 
and he would sit on the parlor floor with 
his legs crossed. listening to the Sermon 
on the Mount, or the story of the raising 
of Lazarus. I's hard to say how much he 
really understood, but he could listen 
for hours without moving à muscle 

At the time, she was already ill, and 
reading aloud was a strain, so she began 
to teach him his ABCs so he could read 
the Bible for himself. But when Poppa 
found out, he forbade it. It was against 
the law, he said, and would only lead to 
trouble. Momma thought it over and 
said that, as always, he was right. 

When she died, may God rest her soul, 
Titus burst out crying and did so lor 
days, sometimes in the middle of polish- 
ing my boots or tying my He nev- 
er cared much for Poppa, though. None 
of the servants did. I think his deep 
voice frightened them, along with his 
friendship for Mill, who was forever de- 
scribing how he urged his overscer to lay 
on the cowhide just to keep his field 
hands in their place. 

Yet, when Poppa passed away and the 
servants found out that I had no inten- 
tion of selling any of them off, Titus 
asked. permission to lay a wreath of r 
from our garden on his grave. Come to 
think ol it, it was the same day that all 
the trouble began. And it was Mill who 
started it. He had just come in from the 
country with a load of tobacco, and 
stopped off at the house to pay his re- 
spects. When he caught sight of Titus 
picking lowers in the garden, he put 
down his drink. 

"That's a handsome buck you've got 
there,” he told me. 

“Thank you." 

"How old is he now?" 

“1 don't know. Twenty, twenty-one." 

"It's about time you got him a wife. 

“Т suppose so." 

“It’s а good investment. А m 
to think of the future.” 

"I suppose you're right." 

Hc took a sip of his bourbon and lit a 
cigar. “You've got what? Eight niggers 
here?" he wanted to know 

“Six,” 

“Yes, that's right, 1 remember. Three 
women and three men. The trouble is, 
of course, your women are too old." 

“Tm not sure 1 follow you." 

m thinking about Titus. You can't 
give him Aunt Henny or Carolinc. And 
whats her name—the cook—must be 
near fifty." 

“Then what do you suggest?" I asked. 

"Well, Гуе got an eighteen-ycar-old 
mulato you сап have for fifteen 
hundred. dol 

"Thats a little high." 


n's pot 


s: 


“Don't say that. She's a good breeder 
Already had twins." 

No, it's too much money. 

It’s an investment, sor 


Look at it 
that way. She and Titus will ha 
least one kid a year." 
TI think about. it." 
I tell you what ГЇЇ do. I'm coi 


back to town next TI ud Lll 
bring her along. You see for 
yourself.” 

“That's fair enough.” 

"Good." 

We shook hands on it. ] can remem- 
ber thinking that there was no sense in 
telling Titus to get his hopes up until 


we made the deal. On Thursday alter 
noon. Mill brought Nonny, all done up 
in a blue calico dress with a red ribbon 
in her hair. She's a goodlooking high 
yellow, with a thin nose and beautiful 
white teeth. Mill told me that her twins 
had been weaned six months before and, 
as is customary on plantations in the 
county, taken away from the mother and 
given imo the care of an old woman 
who could no longer do anything else. 
The girl appeared not to care onc wa 
or the other. She was wearing shocs—per 
haps for the first time—and her fe 
hurt. 1 
we weren't looking, she bent down in a 
corner and massaged her toes. 

By this time. as you can imagine. all 
the servants in the house had an idea 
what was going on. I could hear them 
laughing im the kitchen. When Titus 
brought in the drinks, all he could do 
was stare, openmouthed, at the girl, who 
finally straightened up and laughed in 
his face. 

An investment, son," Mill repe: 4. 
“Both of them are light. The kidsll be 
worth a fortune." 

To make a long story short, we made 
а deal for 51200—5500 down and the rest 
to be paid out in two vears. But there 
was trouble right away. 1 put Titus hed 
in the attic, but on the first night. she 
locked him out, and he slept outside the 
door like a dog. 

"She's no good,” he told me the next 
morning. "She's no Christian, Master 
George." 

Well. she comes from the cou 
IH take time. You can teach her. 
No, sir. She says no God would have 
ken away her babies.” 
Then tell her that’s w 
for. She can. have as many 
wants." 

Yes, 

For almost a week she would let 
him near her. The nts razzed him, 
of course, and you could see him gett 
more excited and ashamed every d. 
was right about the shoes. She we 
around the house barefoot, helping Aunt 
Henny clean up. 
them around. "The girl slapped his hand 

(concluded on page 197 j 


ticed that when she thought 


she's here 
ore as she 


ту 


and "Fins followed 


H exploring the technological possibilitics—as yet untapped 
—of lifting man out of the stone age of sensual pleasure LET JOY BE NFINED 


v of human ingenuity that virtually no new sensual pleasures have been invented in the whole of 
al exception of flying which as a concept is as ancient as any of which we 


article Wy JAMES i 


IT IS A CURIOS 
recorded history. With the margi 
have record-—most joys of the senses were old stuff in Babylon in 2225 v.c. (and that includes speeding; they had 
ys of science-fiction writers into the vast field of sensual pleasure have been unexpect- 
edly few in number and timid in concept. For the most part, their proposals have been limited to the vicarious en- 
joyment of the already known; Huxley's "feclics;" essentially only a widening of the sensory spectrums of the cinema, 
mple. But was everything old stuff in Babylon? After all, the people of that great city didn’t have the 
motion picture. Nor did they have vibrators, TV playback units, distilled liquors, most drugs, refined foods and 


ILUSTEATION EY SEYMOUR CHWAST 


cooking techniques, general cleanliness, bottled oxyge ures we take 
for granted. 

All this is true but not to the point. If we are to talk here about sensual pleasures, then we must begin by sepa- 
rating pleasure from entertainment as sharply as possible. Though the line is sometimes decidedly fuzzy, the two 
difler—when they do—in only one major respect: Pl inherently pri nd active; ent 
is usually public, impersonal and passive. Thus, there is a vast difference between flying an airplane and riding in 
one. There is also a vast difference between acting in a play and just watching one. We ought to be aware, too, of 
differences that are only differences in degree. The Babylonians did not have vibrators, but they had massage; they 
did not photography, but they had painting; they did not have printing, but they had reading; they did not 
have whiskey, but they had alcohols; they did not have soap, but those who could afford to be clean managed to be; 
they did not have bottled oxygen, but they knew pure air when they breathed it. Most of the advances of this kind 


till photographs, and a great many other pl 


sure ij 


ale, person: 


103 


PLAYBOY 


104 


we have made over them are simply 
refinements, and some of these simply 
statistical—à matter of nose counting. 

Nor has there been any real change in 

emertainment, either, since the age of 
Perides—only in ways of presenting it, 
such as TV and the motion picture. Cer- 
tainly there has been no measurable im- 
provement, Here the best efforts of a 
Dante, a Shakespeare or a Goethe have 
managed only to keep us roughly on a 
par with Sophocles, no mean achieve- 
ment in itself. Novelties in presentation 
are always cropping up, but no techno- 
logical ingei on anybody's part is 
going to improve the product. That is 
strictly the province of the creative art- 
is, who can work his miracles on any 
ge or in any medium. 
These piddling advances aside, the di- 
rect, private pleasures of the senses have 
not undergone any really significant 
єз. This is a deplorable маш of 
airs, and one | propose to remedy 
forthwith. It seems to me that this cu- 
rious backwardness on the part of tech- 
nology—or of the sensualist—is not likely 
to persit im a society where physical 
alth, leisure and technical skills arc 
creasing explosively. 

What, then, are some of the unreal 
ized possibilities of the senses? Let's con- 
sider them one at a time: 

1. Odor. Appealing to the sense of 
smell has always been a haphazard, 
clumsy and rudimentary procedure with 
very little skill or ingenuity involved. 
The situation can be summarized by 
noting that this sense has as yet no art 
form that appeals directly |o it, as do the 
other senses. Even at its subilest, the per 
fumer's eraft is still a marginal or ancil 
lary one, operating mostly by guesswork 

nd rule of thumb. There is no scientific 
language of words or symbols that per- 
mits odor tech 
ent new обот» nothing but the per- 

I experience of trial and error. 

The reason for this, in turn, is that 
there is as yet no satisfactory theory of 
how odors get to the nose, how the nose 
distinguishes between them, or how the 
brain imerprets the odor messages that 
it gets [rom the nose. Perfumers and aro 
matics chemists—despite their involve- 
ment in а 5100,000.000 industry—are 
constantly confronted by the fact that 
people perceive odors differently, per- 
haps because of differing backgrounds 
and associations. Anyone who has ever 
nied to describe an odor, or even to re 
member onc, can appreciate this diff- 
ашу. The other senses do not behave 
this way: Almost everyone agrees on 
what color red is or on what an oboe 
sounds like. АШ in all, it is no wonder 
that there is yet no technique for synthe- 
sizing and combining odors rapidly and 
reliably, with firm control of duration 
and intensity, nor any way of recording 
them; and hence no art form. 

When such techniques are invented— 


sor 


as is inevitable, although it may пог 
come soon—early uses will doubtless fol- 
low such conventional lines as the scor- 
g of dramas for odor accompaniment. 
A fairly recent. American movie called 
Behind the Great Wall made a stab at 
this: The scents of barnyards, bombs, 
smoke, rivers, tigers, oranges and people 
were blown at the audiences through air 
duets. The technique was cumbersome. 
particularly since there was no way of 
clearing the hall of one odor before the 
next came along, and foundered on 


other basic and maddening behavior of 


the sense of smell—ir tires easily, becom- 
ing quite anesthetized to any specific 
odor after about ten minutes and 
relusing to recover for at least ten more 
minutes, 

Another such use might be the accom- 
paniment of music with odor, particular- 
ly music intended to evoke or exploit 
memories. A simple example might be 
the matching of September Song to the 
smell of autumn leaves burning: and a 
work such as Beethoven's Sixth Sympho- 
ny, the “Pastoral,” might have imposed 
on it (refining a technique pioneered 
by S. Piese, a 19th Century French per- 
fume manufacturer) a whole spectrum 
of bucolic odors—new-mown hay, cider, 
As the technique became 
more cated, the practitioner 
would be likely to try for dissonant 
eflects—where the music says “horses.” 
for example, the odor organist might 
counter with a УПИ of gasoline. Eventu 
ally, odors would even be matched to 
completely abstract compositions, such 
as а Bartok quartet, providing material 
for reams of controversy about their 
appropriateness. 

The  bestestablished association of 
odor, of course, is with food, and here 
one might uy die scoring of counter- 
pointing odors for a meal. The French 
long ago made the pleasant discovery 
that the joys of cating are heightened by 
talking about food during the repast— 
and not necessarily about the food being 
eaten at the moment, An orchestrati 
of related odors would also scem to be 
worth exploring 
Odor is a crucial sex lure in the a 

kingdom, and people have used it 
that way, too, all the way back to prchis- 
tory. Though perfumes have come to be 
aphrodisiac in themselves—probably by 
association—they seem to have first come 
into use to mask body odors, as a prede- 
cessor of soap. Many people of both 
sexes, however, find the unadorned odors 
of the other sex exciting, as Dr. Albert 
Ellis has described in some detail; and, 
after all, the chief ingredient of the most 
ably aphrodisiac perfumes—musk—is 
simply the body odor of another 
a secretion of the male musk deci 
this technique, too, is still in a surpri: 
ly rudimentary state. There may well be 
hundreds of chemical compounds that 
do not occur in nature that would be 


more reliably and powerfully aphrodis 

those we now know. The 
с effect, of course, might be 
drug action, like the intoxicating effects 
of ether, acetone or airplane dope, and 
not at all related io what the compound 
smells like. 

An abstract art of odor composition 
ting pure odors for olfactory 
not ted to literary 
or culinary stories or programs—may fol- 
low. Presumably, it would be broadcast 
as electrical impulses directly to the ol- 
factory bulbs or even to the brain, from 

keyboard instrument that allowed. pre 
cise and delicate choices of overtones 
and blending ellects, as do the stops of 
an electronic organ. A work in this form 
would resemble purc music or abstract 

ng, having no semantic content and 
not intended 10 remind anyone of an 
thing; it would exist for its own sake. In- 
dividual odors, like individual notes in a 
symphony, might be prolonged. or pass 
in a split second; they would be matched 
against cach other simultaneously in an 
equivalent of harmony; they would be 
contrasted in blocks, like masses of color 
or orchestral choirs; and their sequence 
would be important, like melody, for 
odor composition would most closely re 
semble music—an art that could not be 

pprehended in any order that the au- 

dience could choose, but instead an ап 
strictly oriented in time, with the order 
firmly and permanendy fixed by the 
composer. Certamly, the critics of such 
works would have a field day hurling 
olfactory imprecations at composit 
they didn't like. 

H this stage of development is ever 
reached, future generations may er 
greatly heightened sensitivity of the h 
man nose, at present perhaps the dullest 

nd most neglected of the major organs 
of sense. A whole section of the bra 
awaits such a possibility 
‚ the rhinencephalon or "smell- 
" which testifies to the enormous 
ce our predecessors on the evolu 
tionary wee placed on odors as a source 
of information about the world. ‘The 
rhinencephalon now serves a number of 
other important functions, but prob 
bly, like the rest of the brain, a large 
part of it is simply held in reserve 

2. Sound. The limits of human hear 
ing sensation hed 
already, as far as the arts are concerned 
[see the author's Music of the Absurd. 
PLAYBOY, October 1964], though there is 
probably still some future in clectronic 
devices and other newly invented instru. 
ments, such as these being exploited by 
the French group of composers and engi 
neers headed by Pierre Boulez, and the 
musique concrète school of Stockhausen 
and the late Edgar Varèse. 

However, certain highly specific sounds, 
not tied into a relationship with others 
as they are in a musical composition. 

(continued on page 131) 


| OYY раї 


= 
RI 


an on-the-go abilene architect 
has designed his own home on the range so 


can take it with him 
ARCHITECT Jic латак HOUSE is an inside job. From the outside it looks like a caretaker's shack, 
which it is officially supposed to be, as it is situated in an oil company's storage yard in the 
middle of Abilene. While the location might not be what most people consider prime, it suits 
architect Tittle perfectly. As he points out, “You can't scc it from the street, and 1 don't have 
any yard to keep up. 

Inside, the house reveals its true identity: a single man's deluxe retreat that lends itself to 
the quiet life or to large-scale entertaining. Basically, it is one large (900 square feet) room 
with raised sleeping platform, a bath, a kitchen and storage space. The interior is strongly 
architectural, tempered by a lavish use of natural wood—a frieze of shingles runs around the 
upper perimeter of the room. But its most striking clement, a focal and gathering point, is a 
\7foottall chimney hood of copper with an acidized finish that gives it a glowing pa 

A noteworthy feature of Title's house is that if he ever tires of the seclusion of 
the storage yard, he can move the house with about as little trouble as it would take to 
move a large trailer. The house is on stilts, and was designed to stay within the Texas 
highway department's. maximum house- and trailer-moving allowance. 


A 19-foot modern stained-glass 
window enhonces one side of 
Jim Tittle’s house ond brings 
оп atmospheric, underwoterlike 
light to the interior. Left: Arch 
tect Tittle reloxes in o choir of 
his own design. Made of teak 
the chair fills back ond holds 
itself in ploce when the sitter 
find: a comfortoble bolence 
At lorge cocktail parties, guests 
find the one-room house big 


enough for comfort but not in 


limidoting in scole. Lighting 
hos o great део! to do with the 
intimate quolity of the room ot 
night. All of it is indirect, ond 


of it comes from down 
lights built into the frieze 
thot forms on oftention-get 


ting border oround the room. 


The great copper chimney 
hood occupies center stage af 
Title’s living room in the round. 
The white shag rugs Ihot were 
especially made to fit oraund 
the steel of the fireploce 
rest on o floor of dark-stained 
red ook. The walls thro 

the house are covered with 
natural- 


Furniture, 


of twa pieces, wos designed 
by Title. The sleeping plat 
form is o few steps above 
the living-room level ond 


foces the central fireplace. А! 


parties, guests are opt to sil 
оп practically anything. Here, 
а couple enjoys after-dinner 
coffee an the open stairs lead- 


ing to the sleeping plotform. 


PHOTOGRAPHY BY 


BARR! 


O'ROURK 


PLAYBOY 


108 


PUNCH 


YOUR 


he called himself charles journal or adam jones, but he did not know who he was or where he was or why 


fiction By KEN W. PURDY is тнат vear, Charles Journal, if that was his name, and he wasn't 
sure, had taken to going to ‚ not the same one every time, and willing himself out of himself. and a 
Jong way off. It was surprisingly easy to do, and better, as an oblivion-producer, than alcohol or pot, except 
that it was harder to come back than to go. He knew why. He had walked a couple of sleeping-pill cases in 
his time. They fought coming back, they hated it. Oblivion is heaven, after all, it is the only heaven, and 
the loss of it is surely hell. So, certain of the root of the matter, he worked on it. He liked to think that 
il he could really learn to go and come back, in and out, he could teach. the technique. He would be à 
benefactor to humanity, and he would be remembered, ап immortal, unlike the nameless heroes who first 
drank spoiled grape juice and put fire to hemp. But, in the main, he thought of himself. 

lt was and he would quick- 
ly, or so it seemed, find himself happily disoriented, wholly out of himself, out ol touch with reality, quite un 
aware of where he was, so that he would be looking, say, at the leaves scattering over the level lawn ol the 
park in autumn, finding rare beauty in them, wondering from what high-reaching trees, in what strange land, 
they had been blown. And nearly alw because he was still learning, and out of fright at the ch 
being able to get back, he would Ье; most at once to try. He would stare at the leaves, for instance, telling 
himself that they should offer some kind ol clue. Still, they did not. Fallen leaves look much the same the world 
around, It did occur to him that these ran to yellows and browns, lacking the reds and oranges of leaves thrown 
y yle trees. There must be something in that. The little park, or garden, or whatever, in which he sat bore 
some resemblance in shape, in air, to one in Worcester, Massachusetts, near a museum, on a hill. On the other 
hand, there was one much like this near Breese Terrace, in Madison, in Wisconsin. There were red leaves 
there, though. Washington? Were there maples in Washington? Certainly, there were the famous Japanese ma- 
ples along the Potomac, and every year thousands came to sce the cherry blossoms on them, The Nymphen- 
burg in Munich? А founttin, and hidden in the woods a little house made all of shells, and red leaves, yes, 
some red, some brown. He decided he wouldn't worry about it for 
else, he would amuse himself, and he gave himself a new 


y to get off, it wasn't a great deal more difheult than ordinary autohypne 


ce Of not 


while, he would put his mind somewhere 
me, and made a rhyme about it 


They found that Adam Ashley Burton Jones 
Was made of skin, and also bones 

And blood, and guts, and all of that 

And brains enough to fill his hat. 


Whimsical, he thought. He stuffed it away in his head and did another one: 


The policeman came with measured tread 
His flat hat blue upon his head 

Wryly smiling as he said, 

"You poor dear man, your ear is dead.” 


Why “flat blue hat"? There must be something in that. Where do the police wear anything that could be 
called flat blue hats? France? He looked around the p: again. It was more like Gramercy Pa 
of the Champ de Mars. On the other hand, it was more like the Champ de Mars than Gramercy Park. 

He recalled the first verse again. He liked it, but the last line needed fixing. He had me: iras an upside- 
down hat, full of brains to the brim, like Irish stew, but you could read it as meaning brains enough to fill his 
skull and his skull big enough for his hat . . . a string of sentences, in red type, (continued on page 202) 


k than a corner 


Æ untitled 


los 


The‏ ا 
Treasure‏ $ > 
E of Sigga‏ 
E r2 EU ouem‏ 
А Fa { ~~ ` | i». » > ot‏ 


As FAR AS our peripatetic lensmen are 
concerned, California's legendary Sierra 
Madre country is still a perfect place for 
prospecting. Perfect, that is, if it's a Play- 
mate rather than precious metals that onc 
treasures most. And things panned out 
rticularly well for this month's gatefold 
when blonde and blue-cyed Linda Moon 
—the youngest of four rising Moons, 
whose settled in Sierra Madre back. 


mi 
in the spring of 1954—attracted our 


photographic attention. Just turned 18, 
this Michigan-born October miss has long 
а confirmed Californian (“If I want 
ember what snow looks like, all 
1 have to do is ist and take in a 
few mountai and currently 
spends the better part of her waking day 
digging the healthy outdoor life and easy- 

g pace indigenous to this part of 
. "Now that Im out of high 
school," says Linda, "I suppose 1 should 
start thinking about taking a job or going 
to college. But right now I'm havi 
much fun sleeping late а 
lots of sun to concentrate on the seri- 
ous side of things т, all play and 
no work has made Linda a doll girl. 


PHOTOGRAPHY BY 
STAN MALINOWSKI / WILLIAM GRAHAM / GENE TRINDL 


А Blas 


Disploying а master's touch, Miss October lovishes daily dase af love and offectian an her pet 
rabbit ("His name is Tuffs, and he's sort of a playboy in his own right") while he breakfasts 
оп Ње back lawn af her parents’ home. Then it's off for a hike in the nearby woods ("I even 
love going far walks in the roin") before taking a fast turn at brother Mike's gymnastic rings. 


into the swing of things. “I'm cfraid I'm just sosa os an othlele,' reports 
I sew a mean sports outfit.” Still up a tree over what to 
keen good ta her so far. 


Putting her best foot skyward, Linda manages ta get 
the teenaged towheod, “but | can hold my awn on horsebock and 
do with her life, Linda is temporarily content ta “let nature toke its course. There's na denying it's 


PLAYBOY'S PARTY JOKES 


The pert young stenographer came bouncing 
home onc evening wearing a gorgeous mink 
stole. ig before her wide-eyed roommate, 
she asked, “How do I look?" 

“Guilty!” came the reply. 


People who live in glass houses should ball 
е basement. 


ind 


Mox major cities have a -a-prayer” num- 
ber for anyone requiring religious reassurance 
in the form of a brief, prerecorded sermon. Now 
there's talk of establishing a similar number for 
atheists. When you dial it, no one answers. 


A friend of ours says that an ounce of sugges- 
tion is sometimes worth a pound of lure. 


The elderly spinster hired a young lawyer to 
prepare her will. "I have ten thousand dollars 
set aside.” she explained. "and 1 want to spend 
it on myself. Nobody in this town has ever paid 
any attention to me, but they'll sit up and take 
notice when I dic." Warming to the subject, she 
cackled, “I want to spend all of eight thousand 
dollars on the biggest, fanciest funeral this town 
has ever seen! 

“Well,” said the lawyer, “that's a lot to pay 
for burying in these parts, but it's your money, 
madam, and you're entitled to spend it any 
you like. Now what about the other two 
thousand?” 

“ТЇЇ take care of that!" the old woman replied 
with a broad smile. “Гуе never been to bed with 
im to try (hal at least once before 
through. As you сап scc, I'm not much to 
lock at, but I figure for two thousand dollars 
І get me a man that's young enough and 
handsome enough to please me." 

"That night, the lawyer reported the conver- 
sation to je. As they discussed the situa- 
tion, the wife casually mentioned how пісе it 
would be to have the $2000. 

Minutes later, they were on their way to the 
spinser's house, the wife driving. As the lawyer 
stepped from the car. he instruced his wife: 
“Pick me up in two hours.” 

Returning at the prescribed hour, the wife 
tooted the horn. No response from the house. 
She then blew à prolonged blast. An upstairs 
window was raised and the lawyer thrust out 
his head. “Come back in four days.” he shouted. 
"She's decided to let the county bury her." 


Then there was the masochist who was starved 
for affliction. 


warns that if 
ics get any shorter, women won't dare sit 
down and men won't dare stand up. 


Our Unabashed Dictionary defines: 


horizon as a callgirl hopping out of the 
harlot as a place that sells used hars. 
bachelor as a man who never has a bride idea. 
burlesque as а broad take-off. 


divorce court as a hall of blame. 


A weekend golfer, having four-putted the last 
hole, threw his clubs into the golf cart and 
drove toward the clubhouse. Artiving there, 
he saw a squad car parked by the entrance. As 
he walked toward the locker room, а police- 
man stopped him. "Did you drive from the 
fifteenth tee about half an hour ago?" the of- 
ficer asked. 


Did you hook your ball over those trees and 
off the course?” 

"Yes, as a matter of fact, I 
puzzled golfer. 

With anger in his voice, the policeman coi 
tinued, "Your ball sailed out on the hway, 
cracked the windshield of a woman's car; she 
couldn't see where she was going and ran into 
a fire truck: the fire truck couldn't get to the 
fire, and a house burned down! What are you 
ng to do about it?” 

"The golfer pondered a moment, picked up 
his driver, and said: "Well, I think I'm going 
to open my stance a little and move my left 
thumb around farther toward my right side." 


replied the 


p 


The preuy young thing was a trifle taken aback 
at her first visit to the Cheetah in New York 
City. After watching the wildly gyrating couples 
doing the latest in discothèque steps, she de- 
clined her escorts invitation to join them on 
ihe dance floor. 

Come on, pussycat, 
man. "You can do it. 

“I know I can," the girl replied, "but not 
standing up." 


implored the young 


Heard а good one lately? Send it on а post- 
card to Party Jokes Editor, eLAvsov, Playboy 
Building, 919 N. Michigan Ave., Chicago, 
lil. 60611, and earn $50 for each joke used. 
In case of duplicates, payment is made for 
lirst card received. Jokes cannot be returned. 


"Where have you been?" 


n7 


PLAYBOY 


118 


MED Qr (continued [vom page 96) 


5630 profit. But then I lost that amount 
in a stock the same service touted called 
Cook Electric Co. and then lost the 
sum again in Chance Vought Air- 
craft, recommended. by two of my serv 
ices (“poised for a breakout . . ."; "should 
ove to. . ."; "buy on volume at . , 
Then 1 took a tp from a friend with 
inside dope on an insu 
los a whopping SI586. And 
technical service 1 was assured Ford was 
ready for a breakout; that cos 
With cach new loss or oc 
a kind of madness grew in 
hardly wait for any stock I held to be 
sold. written off and forgotten, so that I 
nother one I had already 
picked from a service, from something 1 
the paper or in a financial 
е, or from some of the crude 
s I was beginning to keep on stocks 
L saw recommended. (I hadn't even the 
know-how at first to record volume—only 
ddown moves, to draw almost 
aningless hillocks on graph paper.) 
My money could not rest a moment 
Since 1 always had a list of stocks that 
looked like good buys, I was impatient 
with any stock that didn't move up im- 
mediately. 1 resented the money invested 
in the stocks that my broker had chosen; 
1 wanted it all to invest myself, The 
times I was right were tremendously ex- 
citing and exhilarating; the 
wrong were only temporary 
The gambling fever was taki 
idly—in me, who had never gambled 
cards or in a casino. But once the fever 
has settled in, one can never shake it. 
At the same time, my broker's luck or 
judgment began to de he was 
buying in a falling market, He bought 
100 shares of General Electric at 9054 
and sold them at 85, for a loss of $665. 
He bought 100 shares of International 
Telephone & ‘Telegraph for 4614, sold 
them at 4014, for a los of 5687. He 
bought 100 shares of Pitney Bowes for 
40, sold them for 31, for a loss of S680. 
He bought 100 shares of National Cash 


Register at 68%. sold them Liter th: 


san 


a 


eriorate; 


year for 581g; loss: $1172. 
Thi 


° were profits, too, but we were 
running well in the red. When 1960 
closed. 1 had losses of over $6000 for thc 
year, My broker told me that mine was 
ihe worst account in his books. It was a 
statement 1 was to hear again and а 
from his numerous successors. 

We began to quarrel, He told me the 
trouble with my account was that 1 was 
interfering with it, that when he ran it 
alonc he had done finc. What about the 
mistakes he had made that year? He 
would have done bener. he said. if he 
had not been flustered Dy the irregular 
and vague state of the account. Was he 
running it or was 12 lt couldn't be both. 
His tone was peremptory 

After much anguish, I called him 


ud 


told him 1 was taking my account else 
where. He was unpleasant over the 
phone; it was the first account. he had 
ever lost, he told me, and he felt he was 
losing it unjustly. For my part, though 
somewhat uneasy over the new responsi 
bility. Т was now eager ıo have full con- 
trol, to test my own imagined skills 

1 only wish | had stayed with that 
broker, He was a trader, but consider 
bly more cautious than 1 proved to be 
He would have saved me a fortune 

1 looked for a new broke 
al interview 
ments, I ñ 


After sever- 
їз and several disappoint 
ally was told by my insurance 
agent about a young man who had hit 
upon some astonishing successes for him 
d other friends. This broker had re- 
cently recommended а stock unheard of 
by my insurance man and, sure enough, 
in a few months the stock had gone up 
75 percent on news of a merger. 

1 called on this young man (he must 
have been about 30) a day or so later 
and found him exuemely pleasant and 
likable, obviously as intent and serious 
about. extraordinary success in the mar- 
ket as D was. He seemed to live 
slecp ticker tape, to take no lunch hours 
away from the board room, to put in 
endless outside hours studying the mar- 
ket and financial journals. Hc took me 
into a plush conference room adjoining 
his office and talked warmly and since 
bout the vast potential of a number 
of stocks he had been follow 


different approach from any 1 had seri- 
sly considered before. He was not a 
chartist or a trader, or a fundamentalist 
or long-term investor, He believed in 
special situations. These are 
velopments within a company, such as 
mergers with another firm, profitable 
spinoffs, dynamic new management, 
new-produat development, proxy fights, 
new mineral or resource discoveries, hid- 
den assets or a host of other special pos- 
sibilities that would be reflected in 
higher stock evaluation when they were 
revealed, understood or exploited. 

For the moment, the first commit 
ment he wanted me to make was to bu 
Tennessee Corporation on the big 
board. The firm was supposed to be 
bought up by another company, a move 
eventually did, indeed, take place. 
Т bought 300 shares of the stock at 4214 
о November Ib, 1900. 1 watched it 
climb to 4614 on November 25. drop 
back to 1434 a week later, jump to 49 
the next k, crow 50, drop back, 
jump ab then 55. and so 
on. By the end of March 1961, the stock 
was 5874 In June it even reached 68. 
k into the high 50s. 

ily, almost a year after 1 had 
bought it. on November В, 1961, at 60. 
My profit was about $5000. 


That w 


as fine. If only I had. put all my 


money in Tennessee Corporation. Or 
half of it, But my broker's other favorite 
stock, about which he increasingly began 


to dı wrovertible inside informa 
tion. was 20th Century Fox—and was the 
alyst to my utter downfall 

But for a long time my course could 
not have run smoother. 1 was living out 
all my hopes. In fact, things were going 
so well. so much as they were supposed 
to go, that 1 was not even particularly 
clated.—weren't your stocks supposed lo 
go up in a straight line? Why get excited 
because the sun rises in the mor 
an apple falls to earth? 

We bought 300 shares of 20th Се 
Fox on November 17, 1960, at 3754 
share, A week later, as the stock started. 
‚ 1 bought another 200 shares. this 
at 4014. Т would add to my hold 
the stock climbed, 


п incor 


iny 


accumul, 


the dines recommended by 
vas, whose book I had тє 
cently nd been fired by, in prep 
aration for my new career toward 
wealth. Only a [ew days later, it was 200 
more shares at 4214. The stock slipped 


back a week later to 4014—1 added 100 
shares at that figure. Five weeks later, in 


€ shares to 


1 mmy port 
folio, Then 300 more at 45, 200 at 5? 
and another 200 in April at 5504 (which 


proved to be the exact top of 20th 
Century-Fox for many а year to come). 
Thi was the Darvas dream come true. 
I now had 1900 shares of the stock 
nd, on paper. profits in this one stock 
of about $20,000, Adding my Tennessee 
Corporation. profits to that 1 indeed 
had excellent chance of doubling 
my money that I was now buy 
ing on margin (m addition to tossing 
into the kitty savings, the procecds from 
selling some rental property, a cashed-in 
insurance policy and whatever other 
funds | could fay my hands on). somc- 
thing I had never done with that fool of 
ker, who didit realize the pow 
ge, who wasn't able to think 
ıd would. therefore always remain 
IL. 1 was going to make a million dol 
rs in the stock market—after all, if you 
double your money every wear, (hat 
doesn't take dong I walked around 
buoyed by the secret knowledge of my 
vast paper profi brilliant investor 
who was going to make enough money 
to quit work and do whatever I wanted 
in life, 1 1 my working hours— 
lor the pi nyway—with lools who 
couldn't understand. the dynamics of 
daring, imaginative enterprise. When I 
happened to ran into my first broker on 
the sireci, 1 couldn't re 
bout my present success 
That marked the pinnacle of my mar 
ket carcer. Ahead some $25,000 in less 

than а year, 1 was on top of the world. 
Why was 20th Century-Fox rising so 
(continued on page 126) 


an 


attire By ROBERT L. GREEN 


riis YEAR, there is a full-scale revolution taking place in men's fashions. After several seasons of guerilla warfare 
the uprising is now out in the open. Fading fast is the Ivy-inspired "uniform" look with narrow ties, natural-shoulder 
suits, and shirts with small-spread collars. Coming on strong are a host of exciting new wearables designed to add a 
dash of sartorial independence to a gentleman's wardrobe. The look now is broader and bolder. Wide ties (up to 3 

inches), in forthrig dots, stripes and paisleys, will be coupled with dress shirts that feature higher-rising 
medium-spread collars and French сий. Both coordinate well with shaped double-breasted suits that have deep side 
venis, wider lapels and slightly squarer shoulders. Mod- and Western-inlluenced garb—including shirts with contrast 
ing collars, rugged outercoats in suedes and thick corduroys, and slim-styled slacks worn with wide leather belts—is 
the top-drawer choice. Topside, cloth hats with British rolled brims are making headgear headlines. So join the ranks 


the definitive statement on the coming trends in menswear and accessories 


PLAYBOY’S FALL & WINTER FASHION FORECAST 


RAIN, RAIN Our forecast is wearherinspired as correctly attired outdoor types take the clements—and their girls—in tow. Swing 
g in the п, the fellow at left has donned a wool coordinate suit th Judes a Daskerweave three-button jacket, matching 

vest and check slacks, by Stanley Blacker, S80: multistriped chambr: by Lion of Troy, 56: and batik print tie, by Berkley. 

S4. His nearby friend favor corduroy four-button suit, by Haspel, 550; with striped cotton shirt. by Exccello, 58. polka- 

dot tic, by Beau Brummell, $2.50. The dashing chap at right sporis an Orlon velourfinish pullover, by Robi 

ilong with side-striped cavalry twill slacks, by Paul Ressler, $16: and lined, water-repellent cotton duck coat, by Carhartt, S22. 


PHOTOGRAPHY BY LARRY G 


a 


tin stripin 


by Adam, 511. Young exec with his gal Friday-Saturda: donned a black wool one-button suit with s 
wl collar, slant pockets, by Tempo. $90: a striped broadcloth shirt with rounded collar, barrel culls, by Excello, $8 
vetz, $7.50. On far right, a promising diplomat intent on improving 

мей flap 

‚ double cuffs, by 


notched sh 
ave silk tie with woven dots, by 


and а wide basket 
afterofice protocol boasts a black worsted two-bunon double-breasted suit with peak lapels, chalk-stripe pattern, 


a cotton chambray shirt with contrasting medium-spread colla 
ed Talian silk pocket square, by Dumont, S: 


and ticket pockets, by Worsted-Tex, 595 
0: wide Macclesfield tie, by Rivetz, $7.50; and paisley paue 


Hathaway, $ 


WINDWARD Ou: for a gusty autumn romp, our sartorial расеѕецет are putting their right fashion foot forward. From left 
t: Fellow toting beauty and the brut wears a Mod-influenced Dacron and wool three button dinner jacket with slanted 


Пар pockets and deep side vents, and low-rise formal trousers that feature a wide satin belt worn instead of a cummerbund, by 
Alter Six, $100; cotton pleated-front shirt with French сш, long-pointed collar, by Manhattan, 57; and satin bow tie, by After 
Six, $1.75. Next chap has donned a brushed covert double-breasted оше ned to be worn over formal fittings, by 
22 Aquascutum, $125. Casual lad а ter making а grandstand play cottons to a cotton-corduroy three-button sports jacket with 


deep side vents, rayon and wool overcheck-pattern lining and lapel facing, wooden buttons, by Corteficl, $35; wool hopsack 
slacks with brass-buckled. striped elastic belt, by Jaymar, 518: and an oxford shirt with buttondown collar, by Van Heusen, $5. 
Cheerleader hip-hoorays for sueded-leather double-breasted trench coat with full removable belt, zip-out Orlon pile lining. slash 
pockets, leather buttons, by Cresco, $95; and imported wool ribbed pullover with high crew neck, by Banif, 515. Our unlonc- 
some end man is decked out in а double-knit cashmere cardigan, by Jantzen, S58: striped. cotton herringbone-weave shirt with 
buttondown collar, by Sero, $7; and wool slacks with extension waistband and quartertop pockets, by Austin Hill, 


124 


SNOWBOUND Winuy scene finds our indomitable snowmen dressed right for the festivities. Left to right: Sledder sports 
wool V-neck popcorn-knit. pullover, by Himalaya, $2 
slacks, by Asher, $20. The chap thawing out a close fri 
button-flap pockets and full belt, 537.50, m 
S7. all by Brolly Male; and cotton square 


150: oxford burrondown dotted shirt, by Moss, 56: and wool worsted 
has donned a cotton-corduroy Mod style four button jacket wit 

(ching slacks, $13, and cotton floral-print shirt with high-rise button-tab. collar 
d tic, by Hut, $2.50. The scluss-minded male heading for the hills carries a double 
breasted suede outercoat, by Robert Lewis, 585; over his wool ribbed turtleneck pullover, by Banff, $15; and coton and 


nylon twill permanent press slacks, by Lee, $6. Gentleman who wisely prefers the blonde wears a wool coordinate suit that 
includes a flannel two-button jacket and worsted glen plaid with overplaid slacks, by Stanley Blacker, 575; silk broadcloth 
shirt. by Schiaparelli, $20; wool paisley patterned tic, by Wembley. $3; Ital 


n silk pocket square, by Handcraft, $3; and shaggy 
finish Canadian-b 


ver hat, by Knox, $25. He's carrying a tweed outercoat with overplaid, by McGregor, 550. 
is sartorially well balanced in his wool V-neck pullover with scillop-knit texture, by Puritan, $22.50: 
cotton perma 


Jaunty juggler 
worn with Kodel and 
ient press shirt, by Manhattan, 56: silk ascot, by Dumont, 53.50: and wool and Orlon knit slacks, by Contact, 516 


125 


PLAYBOY 


126 


MED CUT! 


pidly? The story, which I got picce 
|, was that the company was going to 
be liquidated, and when that happened, 
the value of cach share would be closer 
5100, thanks to 20th Century-Fox’ li- 
brary of old films that could be sold to 
V and to real-estate holdings all over 
the increasingly valuable terrain of 
reater Los Angeles. 
The stumbling block in this scheme, it 
soon turned out, was the president of 
the comp Spyros Skouras. He still 
liked the idea of making motion pic 
tures. Ie was the money interests, the 
bankers from the East, who wanted to 
liquidate. Jt would take a little longer, 
but they would succeed. In March it had 
been announced that the brokerage 
firms of Carl M. Loeb, Khoades & Co. 
and Treves & Co. had acquired about 22 
percent of the Fox stock, and John L. 
Locb and Milton S. Gould, representing 
those firms. were elected to the board of 
directors: Gould was a specialist in liqui- 
dations. That news had helped. push the 
stock to the heights at which 1 had 
res. Much of this 
possessed by my 
broker, I later learned, was common ru- 
mor all over the Street. But other inves 
tors and brokers had sense enough to 
сале that things are never sure in 
company politics. and. were ready to sell 
it looked like the dissolution of the 
company might be тата, 

When the stock began to slip back 
from its high of 5514 to 52 in 
April, 46 in late May and 41 
June, 1 was, needless to say, pa 
Every the stock dropped one point, 
1 w: almost $2000. T 


s was a 


out 
g experience for me. M 


per profits had disappeared. Рагу 
vice was to have sold long аро—1 
that. But my broker pleaded with me. 
will never forget the day he told me, aft 
er some glib talk about his inside dope 
and the news that was imminent 
"I won't let you sell.” And he meant 

firm was his belief in the financial 


to which he had dedicated. my 
money and his money and the money of 
heaven knows how many other clients 


that he could no more surrender his 
faith in the rightness of his choice than a 
s God 

y investor to re- 
sist the advice of the “expert” who is his 
broker. You always ask yourself, "What 
I know, 1 who am only an outsider 
reading the newspapers, when he is 
there with the tape all day, reads count- 
Is, converses d 


It is very ha 


d managers to ad 
Besides. one wants 
to be convinced. When you have paid 

stock and it is now S41, you are 
axious to sell. Hope buoys your 
n as the actual price sinks. 


prospects ev 


(continued from page 118) 


The newspapers were full of the fer 
ment at 20th Century-Fox. In June and 
July there were continual accounts of 
ions. Rumor had it and my 


ew" it was true—that th 
were desperate but futile gesture 
Skouras, who seemed to be the опе m 


who wanted to continue making pic- 
was on his way out. Cleopatra was 
ill, the biggest financial 


rali icd to the mi id-40s. 

Then public patience evaporated, The 
stock bag » (o fall again and, reluc 
tantly, sold some shares. 1 had 
to, lor 1 was a a margin call. 1 sold 

t 4354. 400 shares at 3914 
А the beginning of August I 
sold another 100 shares at 3954. Final- 
ly. when T read a headline in the August 
9 morning paper, I knew it was all ove 
RUMORED CHANGE AT FOX IS MINOR. 
Skouras was safe; the company would 
not be liquidated, our calculations were 


futile. 1 called my broker before the 
market opened and found him, for once, 
subdued. He admitted all his certainties 


were crushed. 1 instructed him to sell the 
rest. He didn’t protest. 1 got 537 a share 
for my remaining 1300 shares. It was 
just under what I had paid for my first 
300 shares—but 1 had added 1600 shares 
at higher prices on the escalator prin- 
ciple. My loss in 20th Century-Fox wa 
000. 


carly 51 
1 was absolutely demolished. 1 had 
lived with this stock for a year, I had 


climbed to the heights of euphoria vith 
it and had now been flung to the pit of 
despair. My pride in my own judgment 
was shattered. All my theories and all 
my study had ended in so much confu- 
sion. And the loss seemed absolutely dev- 
astating. I certainly never dreamed such 
losses—and worse—would be visited upon 
me, and more than once, until there 
would be nothing left to lose. 


1t was close to the end of my episode 
with 20h Century-Fox that I met the 
man who was to be my mentor for the 
class in my education in the pitfalls 
whom I shall 
call W: s still in his mid-30s, 
d made more than a million dol- 
n the two or threc ycars prior to the 
time 1 was introduced to him. 1 was fat 
tered that a man of his reputation and 
nlluence seemed 10 like me and was will- 
ing to help me. He invited me (o his 
butlered town house for a drink one e; 
ning and there 1 met several other suc 
cessful young brokers and analysts from 
Wall Street. I loved just being permitted 
to listen at the feet of these sages as they 
arends, issues, inside dope. new 
underwritings and the opinions of other 
analysts. One of these young men, ex- 
tremely serious, an intellectual in the 
ck tables if I ever saw one, 1 


discusses 


realm of si 


especially admired. I asked him if 1 
might see him sometime and he said he 
was very willing to meet with mc 
was at that time working as an analyst, 
very highly regarded, at a major invest 
ment advisory fin 

1 called for him at his office, impressed 
once again by my admission to ground 
that for me had the sanctity of the bish. 
colyte. Instead of the 
fancy lunch to which 1 was perfectly 
ready to treat him, he told me he cared 
litle about lunches and hadn't much 
time, and we settled for a hamburger 
and iced coffee at a lile luncheonette 
the Village, nor far from his office. As 
the first essential step, he suggested I 
open an account with one of the brokers 
he used—and that Wallace also used, for 
he and Wallace were good friends. 

1 was delighted. 1 was being given en 
tree to the broker used by two of the 
shrewdest investors in Wall Street, both 
of whom had made considerable sums of 
moncy and were regarded by many of 

heir colleagues with awe and envy. How 
could I possibly fail if they should take 
ie under their win 
This broker, whom I soon contacted, 
was а bit older than 1 and was cert 
ly not a hotheaded enthusiast like the 
broker I had just left. He was pleasant 
and soft-spoken, and the firm he was with, 
though not one of the largest, was long- 
established and quite respectable. I was 
concerned that he did not seem more 
dever aud aggromive and impassioned 
about making money, but both of my 
new friends assured me that he was ex 
able, that they trusted. him 
de money from his sugges 
tions, and that I was in good hands. 
The first stock this new broker put me 
to was Kerr-McGec. И was a stock in 
which his company was very interested: 
they had taken a large position in Kerr- 
McGee. 1 told him that I preferred to 
continue with the system of buying a 
stock as it advanced, rather than com- 
mitting all my funds at once. He agreed 
to that. On August 9, 1961, I bought 
100 shares of Kerr-McGee Oil at 4414. 
А few days later, 1 bought another 100 
s at 457%. Not too many days after 
200 at 4715; and within the 
same month, I made it an even 500 
shares, the last 100 bought at 4814 
«owas the high for the remainder 
of that year—and for the three years 
following. The stock abruptly turned 


op's office to 


around and within two weeks was down 
to 4114. I then found out, to my be 
wilderment, that my two friends, far 


from buying Kerr-McGce through. the 
same broker 1 was now using, were sell 
g it through a different broker, at the 
ery time 1 was buying it. Kerr-McGee 
as my new broker's own idea, and his 
opinion comrary to my 


E 


firm's—an 
friends’ vie 
L told them what I had bought 

(continued on page 212) 


RUMPLEPROOFSKIN 


ONCE UPON A TIME there lived a very 
rich and very beautiful named 
Vicki Trucblood, Her family was ex 
tremely classconscious. I was said 
that Vicki's mother traced her lineage 
in this country back to 114 years be- 
fore the first Indian; whereas an an- 
cestor of her father was said to have 
been witness for the prosecution at а 
Plymouth Rock trial in which John 
Alden was accused of being a pinko. 

For as long as she could remember. 
her parents had always said to her, 


“Vicki, someday you shall marry a 
prince.” 

But Vicki. being an independent 
girl, had other ideas, and one day she 
met a very ordinary man whom she 
liked very much. He was the owner 
of a struggling fur business called 
Rumpleproofskin, Inc. The firm was 
thus named because the young man 
claimed that all his skins were rumple- Ñ 
proof. What he didn't realize was that MES 
no fur skins rumple, which was prob- 
ably one of the reasons why his 
business. struggled 

One evening Vicki brought the 
young man home to meet her parents 
for the first time. "Mr. and Mrs. Tr 
blood," he said to them, "my name i: 
Rob Myles, Т am a furrier, and I 


n 
your first-born child, Vicki, for my 


wile.” 

“Begone!” said the father. “Our 
daughter shall marry a prince!” 

The young man left, but not before 
he kissed Vicki and promised to re 
tum. 

"Who ever heard of a furrier named 
Rob Myles?” said the father to the 
mother. must guess his real name 
and expose him.” 

When the young man returned the 
following night, the father said to 


DIKE, 
ONCE UPON 


TIME... 


salire 
By LARRY SIGGCL 


adult updatings of some unctuous kiddie classics of yesteryear 


him. “Come now, young man, what is 
your real name? Ralph Moskowitz?” 

The young man shook his head 

"Robert. Mendelson?” 

He shook his head again. 

"Raymond Markowitz? Richard 
Myerberg? Russell Mandelbaum? 
Ronald Margolis? Коу Mintz" 

With each name, the young man 
shook his head harder and smiled 
broader. 

Ross Morrisberg? Rudolph Moses? 
Roland Markheld? Raphael Morgan. 
stern? Rabbi Monach?” 

As the father continued calling 
names, the young man shook his head 
harder and harder and smiled broader 
and broader. Suddenly, a private de 
tective, whom the father had hired 
earlier that day, burst into the room. 
Sir,” he said to the father. "perhaps 
this will be of interest to you." He 
handed the father an old high school 
yearbook, opened to a picture that 
bore a remarkable resemblance to the 
young man 


ext to it was this poem: 


In math and econ he does fine, 
Baseball is his favorite game, 

As a furrier he will shine, 

And Reuben Millstein is his name. 


The father and mother embraced 
and began waltzing around the room. 

"Reuben Millstein is his name 
shouted the father triumphantly 
Reuben Millstcin is his n 
echoed the mother. 

"He can't possibly marry our 
daughter!" they cried together. 

Ihe young man, realizing that the. 
tiful—but still quite young— 
Vicki couldn't wed without her par 
ents’ consent, stamped his feet angri 
and stormed out of the house 

“Shouldn't he have changed into а 
gingerbread | (continued on page H2) 


bi 


vote for your favorites for the 
eleventh playboy all-star jazz band 


JAZZ—TRADITIONAL, CONTEMPORARY AND AVANT-GARDE—has chalked up yet another eventful 
year; the new sounds have commingled with the old, a fresh generation of jazzmen has begun 
to make its mark, while a number of the grand old names have left the scene. Evolution and 
revolution continue to change the face of jazz, but the "sound of surprise" remains a constant 
source of enjoyment and excitement. 

"This Playboy Jazz Poll ballot offers our readers the chance to take part in the biggest, most. 
renowned jazz consensus of them all and to bestow accolades on those artists who have done the 
most for and in jazz during the past twelvemonth. The musicians chosen by the readers to make 
up the 1967 All-Star Jazz Band will each receive the highly prized Playboy Jazz Medal. 

Last year, two new categories were added to the Jazz Poll ballot: The Playboy Jazz Hall of 
Fame and Playboy's Records of the Year, and they are again on the ballot. Any instrumentalist 
or vocalist, living or dead, is eligible for che Hall of Fame, except for those previously elected— 
in this case, Louis Armstrong, Dave Brubeck and Frank Sinatra. Just fill in your first three 
choices in the box provided at the end of the ballot. The top three vote getters chosen by our 
readers will be installed as occupants of Playboy's jazz pantheon and will be honored accord- 
ingly. The three categories in Playboy's Records of the Year will give you a chance to vote for 
your favorite LPs of the past year. Just write, in the appropriate box, the titles of what you 
consider to be the best jazz instrumental LP (big band), the top jazz instrumental LP (fewer 
than eight pieces) and the number-one vocal LP. Results of this balloting and of that for the 
Hall of Fame will appear in our February 1967 issue along with the results of our eleventh 
annual jazz poll. 

"To vote, all you have to do is read the simple instructions below, check off your favorite 
jazzmen and fill in your choices for The Playboy Jazz Hall of Fame and for Playboy's Records 
of the Year, where indicated, and make sure you forward the ballot to us. 

1. Your official Jazz Poll ballot is on this foldout. A Nominating Board composed of jazz 
editors, critics, representatives of the major recording companies and winners of last year's poll 
has selected the jazz artists it considers to be the most outstanding and/or popular of the ycar. 
"These nominations for the Playboy All-Star Jazz Band should serve solely as an aid to your rec- 
ollection of jazz artists and performances, not as a guide on how to vote. You may vote for any 
living artist in the jazz field. 

2. The artists have been divided into categories to form the Playboy All-Star Jazz Band, so 
in some categories you should vote for more than one musician (e.g., four trumpets, four trom- 
bones. two alto saxes, two tenor saxes), because a big band normally has more than one of these 
instruments playing in it. Be sure to cast the correct number of votes, as designated on the bal- 
lot, because too many votes in any category will disqualify all of your votes in that category. 

3. If you wish to vote for an artist who has been nominated, simply place an X in the box 
before his name on the ballot; if you wish to vote for an artist who has not been nominated, 
write his name on one of the lines provided at the bottom of the category and place an X in the 
box before it. 

4. For leader of the 1967 Playboy All-Star Jazz Band. limit your choice to the men who 
have led a big band (eight or more.musicians) during the past 12 months; for instrumental 
combo, limit your choice to groups of seven or fewer musicians. 

5. Please print your name and address in the spaceat the bottom of the last page of the bal- 
lot. You may cast only one complete ballot in the poll, and that must carry your name and ad- 
dress if your vote is to be counted. 

6. Cut your ballot along the dotted line and mail it to PLAYBOY JAZZ POLL, Playboy 
Building, 919 N. Michigan Avenue, Chicago, Illinois 60611. Ballots must be postmarked before 
midnight, October 15, 1966, in order to be counted, so get yours in the mail today. 


NOMINATING BOARD: Cannonball Adderley, Louis Armstrong, Bob Brookmeyer, Ray 
Brown, Dave Brubeck, Charlie Byrd, John Coltrane, Miles Davis, Buddy DeFranco, Paul Desmond, Duke 
Ellington, Ella Fitzgerald, Pete Fountain, Stan Getz, Dizzy Gillespie, Lionel Hampton, Al Hirt, Milt Jack- 
son, J. J. Johnson, Elvin Jones, John Lewis (Modern Jazz Quartet), Henry Mancini. Charles Mingus, Wes 
Montgomery, Joc Morcllo, Gerry Mulligan, Oscar Peterson, k Si N. Paul Stookey (Peter, Paul 
& Mary), Barbra Streisand, Ward Swingle (Swingle Singers), Kai Winding, Si Zentner; George Avakian, 
Independent Record Producer; Don DeMicheal, Editor, Down Beal; Leonard Feather, Jazz Critic; Nat 
Hentoff, Jazz Critic; Nesuhi Ertegun, Atanti; Esmond Edwards, Cadet; Dave Axelrod, Ga Teo 
Macero, Columbia; Lester Koenig, Contemporary; Milt Gabler, Decca; John Driscoll 111, Far Rob- 
ert Thiele, Impulse; Richard Bock, Pacific Jazz; Brad McGucn, RCA Victor; Stan Cornyn, Reprise; Ron 
Nackman, United Artists; Greed Taylor, Verve. 


YOUR 1967 PLAYBOY JAZZ-POLL BALLOT 


LEADER Lj Howard McGhee Lj Hank Crawford [] Bill Perkins 
(Please check one.) Г] Blue Mitchell Г] Раш Desmond Г] Flip Phillips 
O Count Basie O Lee Morgan Û Jerry Dodgion E] Boots Randolph 
Г] Les Brown E] Ray Nance L] Lou Donaldson E] Sonny Rollins 
O Ray Conniff D Joc Newman O Bob Donovan E] Clifford Scott 
E] Johnny Dankworth E] Jimmy Owen O Herb Geller Г] Ronnie Scott 
O Buddy DeFranco L] Shorty Rogers L] Bunky Green LJ Archie Shepp 
O Les and Lamy Elgart П Eric Royal П Gigi Gryce 1 Wayne Shorter 
Ej Duke Ellington E] Doc Severinsen Lj John Handy LJ Zoot Sims 
D Gil Evans E] Charlie Shavers П Joe Harriott E] Sonny Stitt 
E] Jerry Fielding E] Jack Sheldon O Johnny Hodges E] Buddy Tate 
Li Terry Gibbs 01 Muggsy Spanier O Раш Hom O Stanley Turrentine 
[1 Dizzy Gillespie E] Rex Stewart LJ Hilton Jefferson Ben Webster 
E) Benny Goodman П Clark Tery O Eric Kloss [] Frank Wes 
E] Lionel Hampton E] Jee Wilder O Lee Konitz L] Jimmy Woods 
D) Slide Hampton [ju ЕЕ. e e El Walli Yevifaky, п 
О Ted Heath B... [D Charlie Mariano El 
E] Skitch Henderson pipes TU Le Tn К ЧТ 
O Woody Herman тү гет ЕТ рүү үг BARITONE SAX 
E] Harry James Û Roscoe Mitchell (Please check one.) 
E Quincy Jones TROMBONE D James Moody Ej Pepper Adams 
O Thad Jones / Mel Lewis (Please check jour.) E] Ernie Caceres 
E] Stan Kenton [] Dave Baker LJ Harry Carney 
O Rod Levitt O Milt Bernhart E] Art Pepper LJ Charles Davis 
o John Lewis Г] Harold Betters O Gene Quill Г] Chuck Gentry 
D) Henry Mancini E] Bob Brookmeyer E] Marshal Royal Г] Jimmy Giuffre 
O Billy May E] Lawrence Brown L] Bud Shank D) Frank Hittner 
E] Gary McFarland E] Georg Brunis Г] Sonny Simmons E] Bill Hood 
O Charlie Mingus E] Jimmy Cleveland E] Zoor Sims D Artie Kaplan 
E] Gerry Mulligan E] Cutty Cutshall O Willie Smith П Gerry Mulligan 
E] Oliver Nelson © Wilbur De Paris O Sonny Stitt C] Jack Nimitz 
E] Marty Paich Г] Vic Dickenson E] Paul Winter D Cecil Payne 
O Johnny Richards Г] Bob Fitzpatrick E] Jimmy Woods O Ake Persson 
L] Nelson Riddle O Carl Fontana C] Phil Woods o Jerome. Richardson 
Г] Shorty Rogers [] Curtis Fuller 0) Leo Wright Г] Ronnie Ross 
О Pete Rugolo O Tyree Glenn pj ee AE Les Rout! 
D William Russo Г] Bennie Green [E Cp — — D Clifford Scott 
E] Johnny Williams O Urbie Creen E] Bud Shank 
Г] Gerald Wilson О Al Grey TENOR SAX 0) Lonnie Shaw 
[1 Si Zentner [ÛJ Slide Hampton (Please check two.) E] Sahih Shihab 
Г) Е ay eme Tr DITE, M Georgie Auld E] Butch Stone 
O Wayne Henderson D Albert Ayler E] Stanley Webb 
TRUMPET o J- C. Higginbotham [] Al Cohn D 
(Please chech four.) E] Quentin Jackson Г] John Coltrane 
[] Nat Adderley O J: J. Johnson Г] bob Cooper CLARINET 
Г Henry "Red" Allen [] Jimmy Knepper E] Corky Corcoran (Please check one.) 
O Louis Armstrong E] Rod Levitt Г] Eddie Daniels E] Alvin Batiste 
Г] Benny Bailey E] Melba Liston [] Eddie Davis Barney Bigard 
Г] Chet Baker O Tricky Lofton Г] Sam Donahue E] Acker Bilk 
D Emmett Berry E] Albert Mangelsdorff E] Teddy Edwards E] Phil Rodner 
0 Ruby Braff Г] Rob McConnell Г] Booker Ervin E] Frank Chace 
0 Dave Burns E] Lou McGarity E] Joe Farrell E] Buddy Collette 
Г] Billy Butterfield E] Charles McPherson L] Frank Foster L] Buddy DeFranco 
E] Donald Byrd E] Grachan Moncur IIL Г] Bud Freeman E] Pete Fountain 
E] Conte Candoli O Turk Murphy E] Stan Gez O Jimmy Giuffré 
Г] Pete Candoli E] Dick Nash E] Benny Golson Benny Goodman 
0 Don Cherry 0 Floyd O'Brien [1 Paul Gonsalves E] Edmond Hall 
0 Buck Clayton D] Kid Ory E] Dexter Gordon D Jimmy Hamilton 
Г] Miles Davis E] Benny Powell E] John Griffin E] Woody Herman 
O Wild Bill Davison Г] Julian Priester Г) Eddie Harris П Paul Horn 
0) Sidney De Paris E] Frank Rosolino LJ Coleman Hawkins Г] Peanuts Ниско 
O Kenny Dorham 0 Roswell Rudd O Jimmy Heath [] Mauy Matlock 
0 Harry Edison E] Dickie Wells E] Bill Holman O Art Pepper 
E] Roy Eldridge Li Jiggs Wigham Г) Minois Jacquet Г] Pee Wee Russell 
E] Don El E] Phil Wilson Ej Budd Johnson E] Tony Scott. 
E] Rolf Ericson E] Kai Winding Т) Plas Johnson [1 Bill smith 
[Г] Don Fagerquist. E] Trummy Young Ej Richie Kamuca Г] Phil Woods 
E] Art Farmer D Si Zentner E] Roland Kirk C] Sol Yaged 
E] Maynard Ferguson B D AL Klink a 
D) Dizzy Gillespie DÚ Г] Harold Land 
[] Don Goldic n E] Yusef Lateef PIANO 
T] Dusko Goykevich Га, 20 ый. аск TIC hares! oy. (Please check one.) 
O Bobby Hackett T] Мате Marsh [1 Monty Alexander 
[] AL Hirt. ALTO SAX D Eddie Miller L] Mos: Allison 
E] Freddie Hubbard. (Please check two.) E] Hank Mobley E] Count Basie 
D Harry James [J Cannonball Adderley Г] James Moody Г] Ronnie Brown 
O Carmeli Jones [Ü] Gabe Baltazar E] Vido Musso Г] Dave Brubeck 
[1 Jonah Jones O Al Belletto [] “Fathead” Newman L] Jaki Byard 
5 Thad Jones E] Benny Carter D] Sal Nistico L] Barbara Carroll 
Г] Virgil Jones Ornette Coleman DJ Dave Pell O Cy Coleman 


YOUR 1967 PLAYBOY JAZZ-POLL BALLOT 


[] Bob Darch 

Г] Johnny Eaton 

Г] Duke Ellington 
Bill Evans. 

E] Victor Feldman 

[] Clare Fischer 

LI Bob Florence 

Г] Russ Freeman 

O Don Friedman 

Г] Red Garland 

[J Erroll Garner 

O Dave Grusin 

LJ Vince Guaraldi 

O Friedrich Gulda 

Г] Herbie Hancock 

Г] Hampton Hawes 

O Skitch Henderson 

LI Eddie Heywood 

Г] Earl "Fatha" Hines 

O Elmo Hope 

O Dick Hyman 

C] Ahmad Jamal 

O Keith Jarrett 

L] Pete Jolly 

O Hank Jones 

O Roger Kellaway 

C] Wynton Kelly 

D] John Lewis 

Г] Ramsey Lewis 

Ll Junior Mance 

D] Toshiko Mariano 

C Ronnie Mathews 

Г] Les McCann 

E] Marian McPartland 

DJ Sergio Mendes 

[] Dwike Mitchell 

C] Thelonious Monk 

Г] Bud Montgomery 

C] Morris Nanton 

[] Peter Nero 

Г] Phineas Newborn, Jr. 

C Bernard Peiffer 

C Oscar Peterson 

Г] Bud Powell 

J André Previn 

O Jimmy Rowles 

C George Shearing 

[] Don Shirley 

O Horace Silver 

O Раш Smith 

0 Martial Solal 

c Jes Stacy 

C] Billy Taylor 

Г] Cecil Taylor 

[Г] Bobby Timmons 

O Lennie Tristano 

C] McCay Tyner 

Г] Mal Waldron 

Г) Cedar Walton 

L] Randy Weston 

Г] Mary Lou Williams 

L] Stan Wrightsman 


GUITAR 
(Please check one.) 
[J Laurindo Almeida 
E] Chet Atkins 
C] Billy Bauer 
C] Billy Bean 
ГЇ Mike Bloomfield 
Г] Luiz Bonfa 
[] Kenny Burrell 
E] Charlie Byrd 
D Eddie Condon 
io 


E] Tal Farlow 


D Вапу Galbraith 
D João Gilberto 

Г] Johnny Gray 

E] Freddie Green 
E] Grant Creen 

D Jim Hall 

[] Bill Harris 

D Al Hendrickson 
E] Barney Kessel 

Г] Mundell Lowe 
E] Wes Montgomery 
0) Oscar Moore 

[D Топу Mottola 


0 Joe Puma 

E] Jimmy Raney 
Г) Howard Roberts 
Г] Sal Salvador 

O Bola Sete 

E] Johnny Smith 
Les Spann 

0) Gabor Szabo 

LJ René Thomas 
E] George Van Eps 
D AI Viola 

E] Chuck Wayne 
D Attila Zoller 

o 


(Please check one.) 
DJ Don Bagley 
D) Norman Bates 
E] Joe Benjamin 
E] Keter Betts 
DJ Ray Brown 
E] Monty Budwig 
О Joe Byrd 
01 Red Callender 
D Ron Carter 
C Paul Chambers 
D Gene Cherico 
E] Buddy Clark 
Г] Joe Confort 
D Bill Crow 
L] Art Davis 
D Richard Davis 
George Duvivier 
D Richard Evans 
Pops Foster 
O Johnny Frigo 
C] Jimmy Garrison 
0 Eddie Gomez 
Г] Charlie Haden 
Г] Bob Haggart 
E] Percy Heath 
E] Milt Hinton 
E] Major Holley 
[] Chuck Israels 
E] Chubby Jackson 
Г] Eddie Jones 
E] Sam Jones 
E] Norman Keenan 
E] Bill Lec 
Г] Cecil McBee 
0 Pierre Michelot 
[1 Charlie Mingus 
O Red Mitchell 
O Joe Mondragon 
E] Monk Montgomery 
O Gary Peacock 
L] N. H. Pedersen. 
Г] Bill Pemberton 
D Mike Rubin 
O Howard Rumsey 
O Eddie Safranski 
C] Arel Shaw 
Slam Stewart 
E] Steve Swallow 


YOUR 1967 PLAYBOY JAZZ-POLL BALLOT 


D Leroy Vinnegar 
Г] Wilbur Ware 
Г] Butch Warren 
O Gene Wright 
Г] El Dee Young 
п 


DRUMS 
(Please check one.) 

E] Dave Bailey 
D Donald Bailey 
Г] Danny Barcelona 
[] Ray Bauduc 
[] Louis Bellson 
E] Ан Blakey 
E] Larry Bunker 
C Frank Butler 
© Frank Capp 
Г] Gary Chester 
Г] Kenny Clarke 
D Cozy Cole 
D Alan Dawson 
E] Jack DeJohnette 
L] Joe Dukes 
Г] Frankie Dunlop 
Г] Nick Fatool 
Г] Vernel Fournier 
C Sonny Greer 
E] Chico Hamilton 
O Jake Hanna 
Г] Louis Hayes 
Г] Roy Haynes 
П) Red Holt 
Г] Stix Hooper 
Г] Daniel Humair 
DJ Phil Humphries 
C Ron Jefferson 
Г] Elvin Jones 
O Je Jones 
E] Philly Joe Jones 
O Rufus Jones 
E] Connie’ Kay 
Г] Gene Krupa 
C] Don Lamond 
E] Pete LaRoca 
O Stan Levey 
C] Mel Lewis 
Г] Shelly Manne 
O Joe Morello 
E] Sandy Nelson 
E] Sonny Payne 
Perkins 
c Persip 
E] Bill Quinn 
O Bill Reichenbach 
C Buddy Rich 
C] Max Roach 
C] Jack Sperling 
E] Grady Tate 
О Ed Thigpen 
C George Wetting 
Г] Bobby White 
O Tony Williams 
E] Sam Woodyard 
D 


MISC. INSTRUMENT 
(Plense check one.) 

D Roy Ayers, vibes 
Г] Chet Baker, Flügelhorn 
Г] Ray Brown, cello 
O Milt Buckuer, organ 
irj Bunker, vibes 
Gary Burton, vibes 
Don Butterfield, tuba 
Candido, bongos 
Ornette Coleman, violin 
E] Buddy Collec, flute 


п 
a 
a 
a 
a 


Г] Miles Davis, Flügelhorn 

O Buddy DeFranco, bass 
clarinet 

Leo Diamond, harmonica 

C] Walter Dickerson, vibes 

C Den Elliott, vibes, 
mellophone 

O Art Farmer, Flügelhorn 

П) Victor Feldman, vibes 

O Jesse Fuller, harmonica 

E] Terry Gibbs, vibes 

O Justin Gordon, flute 

JJ Tommy Gumina, accordion 

[Г] Lionel Hampton, vibes 

Г] Groove Holmes, organ 

E] Paul Horn, flute 

D Bobby Hutcherson, vibes 

E] Mile Jackson, vibes 

D Pete Jolly, accordion 

E] Roland Kirk, manzello, 
stritch, flute 

O Steve Lacy, soprano sax 

C] Billy Larkin, organ 

E] Prince Lasha, flute 

Г] Yusef Lateef, flute, oboe 

E] Charles Lloyd, flute 

E] Arthur Lyman, vibes 

Г] Johnny Lytle, vibes 

C] Mike М: ‚ vibes 

Г] Herbie Mann, flute 

C Сагу McFarland, vibes 

Г) Bud Montgomery, vibes 

O James Moody, flute 

Г] Ray Nance, violin 

Г] Red Norvo, vibes 

C Bill Perkins, flute 

O Dave Pike, vibes 

E] Pony dexter, saprano sax 

E] Seldon Powell, flute 

E] Emil Richards, vibes 

E] Dick Roberts, banjo 

[3 Shorty. Rogers, Flügelhorn 

E] Bob Rosengarden, bongos 

O Willie Ruff, French horn 

Г] Mongo Santamaria, bongos 

E] Shirley Scott, organ 

LJ Bud Shank, flute 

E) Jimmy Smith, organ 

O Ray Starling, mellophonium 

O Jeremy Steig. flute 

EJ Clark Terry, Flügelhorn 

C] Jean Thielemans, harmonica 

E] Cal Tjader, vibes 

E] Art Van Damme, accordion 

[3 Julius Watkins, French horn 

O Frank Wess, flute 

[gemere M ج‎ 


MALE VOCALIST 
(Please check one.) 
[J David Allen 
Г] Mose Allison 
[] Louis Armstrong 
E] Harry Belafonte 
E] Tony Bennett 
O Brook Benton 


n, Jr. 
O Ray Charles 

0 Perry Como 

D] Bing Crosby 

E] Vic Damone 

LJ Bobby Darin 

Г] Sammy Davis Jr. 
O Mau Dennis 

[I Johnny Desmond 
D] Fats Domino 

E] Frank D'Rone 


Г] John Coltrane, soprano sax [J Bob Dylan 


Г] Bob Cooper, орос 


E] Billy Eckstine 


E] Sleepy John Estes D Morgana King O At Hirts New Orleans Sextet Н 
O John Сагу E] Teddi King П Groove Holmes Trio 4 
E] Joao Gilberto О Eartha Kitt DJ Ahmad Jamal Trio i 
Г] Buddy Greco O Irene Kral O Jazz Crusaders i 
Г] Roy Hamilton O Jeanne Lee O Pete Jolly Trio H 
E] Johnny Hartman O Peggy Lee O Elvin Jones Quartet H 
C Clancy Hayes O Ketty Lester Lj Jonah Jones Quartet H 
O Bill Henderson LJ Abbey Lincoln Wynton Kelly Trio H 
[] Jon Hendricks Ll Julie London E] Barney Kessel Quartet. (Please check one, H 
E] А! Hibbler 0 Gloria Lynne 0 Roland Kirk Quartet O Andy & the Bey Sisters i 
0 Lightnin’ Hopkins E] Miriam Makeba Г] Gene Krupa Quartet O Beatles i 
D Mississippi John Hurt [J Barbara McNair 0 Ramsey Lewis Trio 0) Brothers Four : 
O Johnny Janis Г] Carmen McRae O Lighthouse All-Stars D Byrds 1 
O Jack Jones O Helen Merrill Г] Charles Lloyd Quartet D Jackie Cain k Roy Kral | 
E] Frankie Laine 0 Marian Montgomery [] Herbie Mann Sextet O Clancy Bros. & Макет d 
0 Steve Lawrence O Jaye P. Morgan 0 Shelly Manne and his Men — [] Double Six of Paris i 
0 Trini Lopez O Anita O'Day O Toshiko Mariano Quartet — [J] Four Freshmen 
[] Dean Martin L] Patti Page [] Les McCann Ltd. [] Four Lads 
Johnny Mathis Esther Phillips O Marian McPartland Trio c Gals & Pals 
[Г] Les McCann O Suc Raney O Charlie Mingus Sextet 0 Hi-Lo's 
E] Roger Miller [] Della Reese D] Roscoe Mitchell Quartet Г] Ink Spots 
E] Joe Mooney 0 Irene Reid E] Mitchell—Ruff Trio OJ's with Jamie 
C Mark Murphy [Г] Ann Richards E] Modem Jazz Quarter Truman Johnson Singers 
O Johnny Nash E] Mavis Rivers 0 Thelonious Monk Quartet — [] Anita Kerr Singers 
E] Jackie Paris Annie Ross 0 Wes Montgomery Trio 0 King Sisters 
O King Pleasure 0 Dinah Shore O Gerry Mulligan Quartet O Kingston Trio 
D Elvis Presley E] Nina Simone C Turk Murphy's Jazz Band [J Limeliters 
[J Arthur Prysock O Carol Sloane O Red Norvo Quintet 0) The Los Vegas Singers 
[Г] Lou Rawls O Jennie smith [3 Oscar Peterson Trio DJ Johnny Mann Singers 
E] Otis Redding O Keely Smith [ André Previn Trio Mills Brothers 
E] Jimmy Rushing O Joanie Sommers Max Roach Quintet O Mitchell Trio 
L] Jack Sheldon E] Jeri Southern E] Sonny Rollins Quartet ГЇ] Modernaires 
E] Frank Sinatra D Jo Stafford [Л George Russell Sextet O New Christy Minstrels 
П Mel Tormé E] Dakota Staton O Pee Wee Russell AllStars — CJ Peter, Paul & Mary 
0 Joe Turner [] Barbra Streisand 0 Bola Sete Trio Г] Platters 
0 Adam Wade Г] Pat Thomas E] Bud Shank Quartet Г] The Raclets 
E) Muddy Waters C Big Mama Thornton [J George Shearing Quintet L] Righteous Brothers 
D Andy Williams E] Teri Thornton O Archie Shepp Quartet E] Staple Singers 
` O Diana Trask O Horace Silver Quintet Г] Kirby Stone Four 
O Jimmy Witherspoon L] Sarah Vaughan E] Nina Simone and her Trio E] Supremes 
— TI Carol Ventura N Timmy Smith Trio [1 Swingle Singers 
O Dionne Warwick O Cecil Taylor Quartet [] Clara Ward Singers 
FEMALE VOCALIST [] Margaret Whiting C Terry-Brookmeyer Quintet — [] = 
(Please check one.) D Lee н 
LJ Lorez Alexandria E] Nancy Wilson 
TH Emestine. Anderson B THE PLAYBOY JAZZ HALL OF FAME 
E] Joan Baer (Tnstrumentalists and vocalists, living or dead, are eligible. Arlists 
Ej Pearl Bailey INSTRUMENTAL COMBO | previously elected—Louis Armstrong, Dave Brubeck and Frank 
D La Vern Baker (Please check one.) Sinatra—are not eligible.) 
[] Mac Barnes (J Cannonball Adderley Sextet 
E] Joy Bryan O Louis Armstrong All-Stars |! 
Jackie Cain Г] Chet Baker Quintet T 
E] Lana Cantrell C] Al Belletto Quartet 
0 Vikki Carr Г] Art Blakey and the Jazz 5 
Г] Dizhann Carroll. Messengers д 
Г] Beny Carter C] Dave Brubeck Quartet 
E] June Christy 0 Charlie Byrd Trio _ PLAYBOY'S RECORDS OF THE YEAR 
0 Petula Clark E] Barbara Carroll Trio BEST INSTRUMENTAL LP (BIG BAND) 
O Chris Connor ГЛ Al Cohn-Zoot Sims Quintet 
D Doris Day [] Cy Coleman Trio 
[] Ethel Ennis C] Ornette Coleman Quartet 
E] Marianne Faithfull Û John Coltrane Quartet 
Г] Frances Faye Miles Davis Quintet 3 q 
z se. iced Е Коа BEST INSTRUMENTAL LP (FEWER THAN EIGHT PIECES) 
0) Connie Francis Г] Dukes of Dixieland 
[Г] Aretha Franklin Г] Don Ellis Sextet 
O Judy Garland 0 Bill Evans Trio 
O Astrud Gilberto C Art Farmer Quartet BEST VOCAL LP 
Г] Eydic Gormé E] Firchouse Five plus Two 
Г] byrdie Green Г] Erroll Garner Trio 
[] Shirley Hom Г] Stan Сеи Quartet 
Û Lena Horne E] Dizzy Gillespie Quintet 
C] Helen Humes E] Jimmy Giutlre Trio Name and address must be printed here to authenticate ballot. 
O Lurlean Hunter Г] Benny Goodman Quintet 
[J Mahalia Jackson O Urbie Green Septet Name 
Г] Eua James Г] А! Grey-Billy Mitchell Sextet 
Г] Damita Jo D) Vince Guaraldi Trio Еа 
Г] Sheila Jordan Г] Chico Hamilton Trio 
O Lainie Kazan L] Hampton Hawes Trio City. 
O Beverly Kelly LJ Earl Hines Trio 


YOUR 1967 PLAYBOY JAZZ-POLL BALLOT 


“I'm afraid ‘Stanley Harris and ‘Irma Trimble’ aren't 
going to work out too well together . . ." 


133 


PLAYBOY 


134 


ET JOY BE UNCONFINED 


specific emotio physio. 
logical effects on human. beings. Some 
liar examples are the nervous jump 
xluced by a firecracker or any other 
xpected sound; or the shudder 
produced by the rap of a finger: 
across a blackboard. (There do not seem 
to be any pleasant examples) This as- 
peet of sound has thus far never been 
explored more than marginally for sen- 
sual use, either pleasant or unpleasant 
‘To some extent, like the exploitation of 
odor, it awaits a theory of why some 
sounds (and only some sounds) behave 
in this way, from which one could pre. 
dict just how wide this particular palette 
ht be. The present “engram” theory 
of such effects—which says, for example, 
that loud, low noises frighten us because 
rouse ancestral fears of saber 
«b tigers—has proven useless for 
both prediction and engineering, and 
hence is more than likely шиги 

In any event, the current repertoire is 
limited to a few sounds, producing such 
oddly disconnected cllects as salivation or 
a sensation of dread. T he salivarion effect 
may be one reason. (though probably a 
minor onc) for the immemorial popu 
larity of dinner music. 10 seems more 
likely, however, that dinner music is only 
a special case of music's ability to produce 
states of relaxation or tensión. Whether 
a single, specific tone can relax or tighten 
the body is quite a diflerent question 

Th r is ves. The few known so 
matic effects of sound establish firmly 
that even now some of music's tradition 
al uses are occasionally more direct in 
their action. upon the body than is sus 
pected even by their practitioners The 
sensation. of awe often experienced. even 
by the irreligious when exposed ro pipe- 
music, for example, may be quite 
divorced from. anything having to do 
with the Church. Instead, it seems to be 
sociated quite specilically with the very 
low tones—around 15 cycles per second— 
produced by the instruments pedal 
ores, especially the 32-foot reeds The 
beats involved here are so slow that they 
can be mot only heard but physically 
felt, both agai in and in the in 
ner ear, which controls the body's sense 
of c. The response of awe may be 
partly associated with the ecclesiastical 
surroundings and associations: divorced 
from these, the pure sensation produced 
may be simply one of disorientation, 
notorious producer of religious ecsta 
sies through the more familiar media of 
drugs, various kinds of st or 
other attacks upon the senses. 

The pipeorgan effect also points to a 
peculiaity of the known somatic effects 
ol wone: Almost all the sounds th: 
duce direct ch the body 


and 


ê answ 


vation 


be heard her subsonic or 
supersonic. Tunnels of love and groitoes 
ol fear im amusement parks often use 


(continued [rom page 104) 


such unsuspected sounds 10 heighten the 
desired. atmosphere, which usually other 
wise is so trumped up that only childre 
get much charge out of it. 

It is a common fact of experience that 
intensity of noise appeals directly to th 
emotions. Very quiet sounds suggest inti- 
macy. simply because one's immediate 
impulse is to move closer to the source 

jı order to be able to hear. Very loud 
noise is menacing. aud there is the best 
possible reason for this: Loud sounds, all 
by themselves, can. kill you. Any noise 
bove 40 decibels in volume, and above 
4000 cycles per second in frequency 
(near the Lrequency of the top tone of 
the piano), produces a spasm of the 
teries throughour the body. If it 
longed, the resultant load on th 
can be fatal. Sound levels this 
both senses of the word) are usua 
ciated ошу with jet engines, but some 

city ns, particularly in 
are almost. as noisy. 

The occasional ellectiveness of music 
in soothing the savage breast, as noted 
both by Congreve and by modern ex- 
ponents of "music therapy" for mental 
illness, may have a slightly different ad- 
ditional explanation: the notorious 
suggestibility of the body processes to 
external rhythms. Anyone who has ever 
tied to march out of step to military 

tesic can testify to this effect, but it can 

be much more subtle. For instance, a 
rhythm that begins at the same rate as 
theat can by subsequent slight 
tually control the pulse rate 
10 some extent—an elfect exploited 
throughout Louis Gruenberg’s two 
opera The Emperor Jones (an. Ameri 
turkey of a few generations back that 
had nothing to recommend it but this 
device, plus Lawrence Tibbett as the 
Emperor). 

The erotic effects of rhythm are quite 
well known and reflected publicly in 
popular music and social dancing, which 
ave been becoming pretty specific late 
ly. There are essentially two kinds of 
tic rhythm involved here. One is the 
steady, monotonous beat that the jazz 
critic Henry s celeb and 
nitive mu- 


foun 


t fertility chants to the 
її roll 


wdless pou of rock. Per 
sistent repetition of this 
the pulse (as in The Emperor Jones), 
which in turn suggests to the body that 
there is some reason for excitement; th 
body promptly responds with a pattern 
of responses called the general adapta 
tion syndrome, which makes us ready for 
any sort of strenuous action, whether it 
be fight, flight or fornication, The gen 
erality of this response is the reason 
roll concerts hover so 
Му between orgy and riot. 

The second kind of erotic rhythm is 
much more subtle, and adolescents do 
not seem to be very sensitive to it. It is 


what is called rising rhythm, in which 


а given  rhyll pattern gradually 
ages into faster patterns—not the 
same pattern played faser, but a 


crease in the nature of the rhythm, Mu 
sic designed to take advantage of (his 
which reflects he chang aure ol 


coital rhythm, can ha 
effects on the musica 


е prolound er 
Пу sensitive, and 


counts for the f 
good Gus have favorite pieces of music 
to which they like 10 make love. The 
Liehestod D: s Tristan und 
Isolde is the most usual choice, but there 
re many others less obvious. It should 
be added that some people lind 


love to music mechanical and restrictive 
but there is по reason that a composer 
who knew exactly what he was out to 
achieve could get around this 
difficulty. After we already know 
that pracucally all music has an e 
effect upon some persons, particul 
along with wine and candlelight. Prol 
bly, however. this effect is simply sugges 
tive, rather than a direct physiological 
response. This kind of lowgrade erotic 
reaction—as contrasted with the immedi 
ate erotic responses to touch, for exa 
ple—may reflect nothing more d 
suggestion to relax. the opposite of the 
fightorflight response. created by the 
general orderliness of music as opposed 
to the dangers we associate with random 


noise 

If this is the case—as Dr. W. Grey 
the British pi 

phy. maintains (in his 
vey of his field, The Living 
Bram)—the continuous flood of barely 

iceable music in which we live 
thanks to Muzak and similar purveyors 
Of audible molasses. may be lulling us 
On many occasions when we ought not 
to be lulled. At the very least, it 
help explain in part why non-Am 
(most of whom prefer to choose (h 


own music at their own times. not 10 
have it forced on them in elevators, 
buses, railroad stations, and so on) think 


us sex-obsessed, 
аге 


d why the advertising 
ty finds it so easy to push that 
particular button in our psyches to sell 
ig fom Spri id sheets to in 
hardware. The theory also sug 
d 
sex 


dustri 
gests that, if music is to find greater 
more specific use in heightening e 


ual lives, we might well start by protest- 
dilute 


ag ds use а ihe 
З. Taste. All 
as one of the 


rudiment 


is always listed 
five senses, it is 
її can discriminate only 
four fundamental sensations: sweet, sour 
salt, biter. That is not much of a palette 
то work with. All the other sens: 
we think we receive through + 
actually dependent on odor. To prove 
this to yourself—though 1 doubt that 
there can be many who haven't already 
tried this experiment, probably in bov 
hood—you need only try to distinguish 

(continued on. page 206) 


fü BAWDY BARD Xo» 


a rollicking photographic satire uncovers new meaning in the well-remembered words of will shakespeare 


By JERRY YUCSMAN 


CLG “Out, damned spot! out, Т say OND 


Macbeth 


CLG "But, softt what light through yonder window breaks?" OND 


Romeo and Juliet 


CLG “A little pot and soon bot." Ss 


The Taming of the Shrew 


Cx "Che lady doth protest 100 much, methinks.” OND 


Hamlet 


C music be the food of love, play on... "OND 


Twelfth Night 


л 
— | 
= 

— — 


== 
QD 


The Tempest 


14 


| 


CES Misery acquaints а man with strange bedfellows” 


“Speak low, if you speak love,” OND 


Much Ado About Nothing 


CLE 


BIKE, ONCE UPON A TIME 


an?" asked the mother. 

You can't have everything,” said the 
ther happily. 

Some years later, when Vicki reached 
эр. she deed obey (hc 

wishes of her parents and she beca 
gaged to a real, true prince. But wh 
she brought him home, her father imme- 
diately placed the following ad in 3212 
newspapers all over the country: "Come 


did 


PLAYBOY 


back. Rob Myles. All is forgiven, my 

the furrier. Love, Horace True- 
blood." 

But, alas, the ads were never answered. 


And that June the young girl married, 
and today she is known as Princess 
of the new African nation of U 


LITTLE RED MIGHTYCOOL 


IERE WAS ONCE a very hip chick named 
Little Red Mightycool. She came from a 
very hip family. Her parents were hip, 
her aunts and uncles were hip. but pe 
haps the hippest of all her relatives was 
her grandmother. 

Red Mightycool lived in a small pad 
on Avenue B on the Lower East Side, 
which, as everyone knows, is much hip- 
per these days than the Village. However, 
her grandmother lived in an even hipp 


A 


liamsburg Bridge 

One day Red Mightycool was taking a 
basket full of goodies to her grand- 
mother, when she heard a rather un- 
usual whistle, It sounded like “Wheceeeee 
Whooooooooooooooo!” 

She stopped and saw standing on a 
corner a young man wearing а wid 
brimmed hat; a long, low jacket; and 
baggy pants, which were very tight at the 
ankles 

Woo woo,” he said to her. “What's 
good lookin 
“Who the hell аге you 


asked Red 


m a wolf," 


ihe young man. 
cupon he began twirling an cighi- 
foot key ch I whistled at her again 

“What is that you're wearing?" she 


is a root suit," he said, “with a 
reer pleat and а drape shape. 
Christ, thought Red Mightycool, thi 
guy is so square he's almost in. 
Whatcha got in the basket, girlie?” 
he asked. 


od, she thought, he called me 

That went out with the Big 

Apple. Oh, well, it certainly couldn't 

hurt vo tell him what she had in the 

basket. 

‘m taking some goodies to my hip 
grandmother who lives in a shack by the 
bridge.” said Red Mightycool. "I've got 

142 six ounces of pot: four ounces of raw 


(continued from page 127) 


opium: an LP recording of Gregory Cor- 
30's tone poem Lint, recited by Maxwell 
Bodenheim nine days after he died; a 
Swedish translati 
Braille: and a twenty-minute experi 
mental film on the sex life of a homo- 
sexual tsetse fly.” 

With that she left him and skipped 
along toward her grandmother's house, 
shuddering momentarily at his parting 
shot, which was “Hubba-hubba.” 

When Red Mightycool arrived at her 
grandmother's shack, the door was open, 
and she went inside. As usual, the old 
lady was in bed, wearing her nightgown 
nd nightcap. But somehow. tonight she 
looked a little dilferent. 

"Grandma," said Litle Red Migi 


cool, "what wild eyes you have!" 
“Well,” the grandmother in a 
strange voice, “the LSD hasn't quite worn 
oll yet." 
“And Grandma,” said the girl, "wh 
crazy pierced ear lobes you haver 


"What could ! do, Cooki 
"b had no more room on thc 


nutty yellow teeth you have 
Го which the grandmother replied, 


"Fm smoking more and enjoying it 
more!" 
With dut, the grandmother threw 


ide the bed covers. and lo and behold, 
was really the wolf. 

"You hippies arc always suckers for 
the square bi" he cried. "You'll find 
Granny in the closet. But right now, 1 
need some мш!” 

And he seized Red Mightycool 
ket and ran off with it into the night. 

Quickly, the girl scized the telephone 
and called the fuzz. 

“Hello,” she said to the desk sergeant, 
“L want to report a robbery. Some fink 
ran oll with valuable goodies of mine.” 

Can you describe the thief?" asked 
the officer. 


bas- 


"he was carrying a 
little bright basket and he was wearing a 
woman's nightgown, and he was runn 
through the East Side 

7E sce," said the officer. "Now tell me, 
was there anything unusual about his 
appearance 


AMBER'S N 


EW CLOTHES 


small 


E Was ONCE a 
pues away. АП die people 
were very vain and very prudish. 

"The daughter of the town mayor was a 
beautiful girl, who was one of the vain- 
est and most prudish of them all. Her 
ne, ironically, was Amber. 

Amber was extremely clothes conscious, 
and she literally exhausted. her father's 
modest income by purchasing the finest 


town many 
the town 


the local pa- 
Amber spicd the following ad: "Zin- 
т. the Шу famous i: 


announces the grand opening of his new 
shop on Main Street. He will weave, to 
order, garments for both men and wom- 


ud 
sold to royal- 


e 


j, using the same priceless fabrics 
incomparable styles he lı 
ty all over the world. 
Now, Amber had never heard of Zin 
bar, but she was too vain to admit this, 
even to herself. So she hurried over to 
the new shop. When Zi began to 
the various fabrics he had wo- 
ven for famous personages, she was 
puzzled, because in reality she 
she thought, if this is w! 
this is what she would 


wears, 


- And in no ume she had deluded 


self into believing that ar was 
indeed displaying some of the mos 
breathtaking fabrics ever seen by the 
human ey 

Amber 


ad herself fitted. for the most 


expensive dress shop, and 


Zinb. 


up ordered her to remove all her 


clothes and then went through the clab- 
orate motions of putting a garment on 
he 


ement he made. 
texture of the g; 
t but dhe way it enhanced. Amber's 
When he was finished, one full 
r later, he Scotch- 
tabel on the back of Amber’ neck: 
Garment Was Designed By Zinbar. 
Internationally Famous Tailor." 
Amber looked at herself in thc mirror 
In actuality, she saw herself as she looked 
when she stepped out of the shower, but 
she would not admit this, even to herself. 
If this is what royalty wears, this is what 
Amber will wear. 

She paid a handsome price for the 


The 
Then 


dress and then stepped boldly and 
haughtily into the sunlight. Proudly she 
began walking up and down Main 


Street, reveling in all the auention she 
was receiving. In ten minutes, the acci 
dent rate in the town doubled all figures 
of the preceding cight years combined. 

But a strange thing was happen 
While all the vain and prudish towns- 
people really saw Amber as she looked 
when she stepped out of the shower, they 
refused (6 acknowledge it. After 
were they any less qualified to apprec 
high fashion than royalty? And did 
the Zinbar label on Amber's neck prove 
that she was wearing a Zinbar garmen 

“What à lovely dress!" said o 

"How beautifully the fabric gleams in 


the sun,” said another. 

"Such superb tailoring,” said still 
another. 

Well, it so happened that in this town 


at the moment was a salesman from an 
other town. He was sitting at his hotel 
window overlooking Main Street when 

(concluded on page 212) 


fiction By P. G. WODEHOUSE 


TE WAS A BEAUTIFUL. AFTERNOON. The sky 
was blue, the sun yellow, butterflies flit 
ted, birds tooted, bees buzzed and, to cut 
a long story short, all nature smiled. But 
on Lord Emsworth's younger son Fred 
dic Threepwood, as he sat jn his sports 
car at the front door of Blandings 
Castle, a fine Alsatian dog at his side, 
these excellent. weather conditions made 
little impression. He was thinking of dog 
biscuits, 
Freddie 


was only an occasional visitor 
at the castle these days. Some years be- 
fore, he had married the charming 
ghter of Mr. Donaldson of Donald 
s Dog Joy, the organization whose 
m it is to keep the American dog 100 
percent red-blooded by supplying it with 
wholesome and nourishing biscuits, and 
had gone off to Long Isand C 
U.S.A. 10 work for the firm. He was in 
England now because his father-in-law. 
anxious 10 extend Dog Joy's sphere of 
influence, had sent him back there to sec 
what he could do in the way of iner 
g sales in the island kingdom. Aggie, 
his wife, had accompanied him, but after 
a week or so had found life at Blandings 
too quiet for her and had left for the 
French Riviera. "The arrangement was 
that at the conclusion of his English 
campaign Freddie should join her there 

He was drying his left car, on which 
the Alsatian had just bestowed a moist 
caress, when there came down the front 
small, dapper elderly gentleman 
with a blackrimmed monocle in his сус 
This was that notable figure of London's 
bohemia, his Uncle Galahad, at whom 
the world of the theater, the racecourse 
and the livelier type of restaurant had 
been pointing with pride for years. He 
greeted Gally cordially. To his sisters, 
Constance. Julia. Dora and Hermione, 
ly might be a blot on the escutcheon, 
in Freddie he excited only admi 

He n a man of 


y 


steps 


considered hi 


Чоп 
infinite resource and sagacity, as, indeed, 


he was. 


“Well, young said G 
“Where are you off to with that dog?" 
"Pm taking him to the Fanshawi 
“At Marling Hall? "That's where th 


prety girl 1 met you with the other day 
lives, isn't it? 

“That's right. Valerie Fanshawe. Her 
father's the local master of hounds. And 
you know what tha 
What does ñ mean 

“That he's the шапа; 
more dogs than you could shake a stick 
the daily biscuit 
ter for them than 
Donaldson's Dog Joy. containing as it 


And what could be bi 


FIRST AID FOR FREDDIE iora «ortis 


laudable intention was to rescue the lad, but what with the 
pooch and the sexy neighbor, the butler had to rescue m'lord 


Uncle Galahad handed Freddie a telegram, whereupon Freddie, having opened and perused 
it, uttered a sharp exclamatian, reeled, clutched at his uncle, and they both fell dawnstairs. 


he could not regard these tactics with 


“I don't see how 1 can miss. Valerie is approval Shaking his head, he went 
the apple of his суе, to whom he can back into the house and in the hall ci 

deny nothing. She covets this А countered Beach, the castle butle 

and says if PH give it to her, she Beach was wheering a liule, f 

that the old man comes through with a been hurrying, and he was no longer the 


Тп 


substantial order about to deliver it 
FOB. 

But, my good Freddie, that dog is 
Aggie's dog. She'll go up in flames." 

“Oh, that's all right. Гуе budgeted for 
that. 1 have my story all set and ready. 1 
shall tell her it died and DH get her 
other just as good. Thav'll fix Aggi 
I mustn't sit here chewing the 
you. I must be up and about 
away. See you later, 
disappeared in a cloud of 

He left Gally pursing his lips. A lif 
Lime spent in the society of bookies, wanted son 
racecourse touts and skitle sharps had course, go 
made him singularly broad-minded, but Constance, 


streamlined young butler he had been 
when he had first taken office. 

issed Mr. Frederick, sir?” 
adth. Why?" 
as arrived for him. 
I thought it might be 


“This 1eleg 
Mr. il 
important. 
"Most unlikely, Probably somebody 
just wiring him the results of the four 
o'clock race somewhere. Give it to me 
`e that he gets it on his return. 
continued on his way, feeling now 
at a loose end. Ó sociable man, he 
ic to talk to. He could, of 
nd chat with his sister Lady 
(continued on page H8) 


rather 


143 


“They're watchdogs, 
Mr. Tate, but I usually 
don't let them." 


IN noUmGES there once lived an exceeding 
small man yclept Petit, entrusted with the 
maintenance of law and order. Called the 
provostroyal, for at that time the king made 
his scat m this good town, the diminutive 
official presented. such a countenance stern 
thar the king in heavy-handed jocosity re- 
Кей, “Petit cannot laugh, for he is short 
of skin about the mouth.” 
But if Petit was sparing of skin, his beauti- 
ful young wife had just rhe right amount 
She was so dowered with charm, so exquisite- 
ly shaped, that even a jackass observing her 
undulations would bray with churlish de 
ight. Her wedding to Petit was no soon 
over, and the episcopal rejoicings complete, 
when it was rumored in the market place 
that she had taken a lover, a certain Lord 
Adolphus, a man of high standing among la- 
dies of the court and thus kicking favor from 
his king. 
Now Ps 


had a superior. a warm-blooded 
constable who also lusted over the wife of hi 
subordinate. A fine spinner of words, he 
wished conversation with this fair baggage, 
preferably in bed at cockcrow. However, 
his arguments and messages were of small 


avail. for Madame Petit was not about to as 
sume a second paramour. Thus, the constable 
had his men follow her to identify her lover, 


set the stage for intrigue. 
1 over- 


and in this mann 

He would send the provost on 
night goose chase. and surely his wile would 
then fly to her lover. Ere midnight the con 
stable would summon back the gullible Pe 
ıd dispatch him ío the keep of Adolphus 
with orders to comb the moldering pile for a 
nonexistent English spy. The ensuing meet 
ing of husband and wife well could end the 
life of the lover, what with a cold shaft in his 
warm belly, Madame Petit might then be 
1ilable 10 the constable. and the king well 
rid of a troublesome lord. Thus reasoned this 
knave; and his majesty, when informed of 
the scheme, was full in agreement 

Accordingly, the provost was dispatched to 
the wastelands. His good wife was beside her 
self with excitement ar these unexpected 
tidings. Forsooth. she sent her maid to 
Adolphus. "Madame will spend the night with 
you here. She has a bone to pick with you,” 
1 the maiden. 

His lordship devoured a grape. Then he 
ordered flagons of mull and plover's eggs to 
be placed about the bedchamber. and when 
love arrived they scampered upstairs as 
lightly as greyhounds. 

Meanwhile, Petit had been recalled and 
sent to Adolphus! house to unearth the non- 
existent English spy. He ovdered his men 10 
surround the house, then he searched down 
stairs, Finally he banged on the door of the 
room where the tournament of love was 
progressing ar a merry pace, "Sie, in the 

mc of the king, thrust open this door erc a 
flight of devils take thee to (hy rest!” 

The lovers recognized the bray of Petit, 
and there under the quiltings Adolphus 
shook as though stricken with plague; but 
the wily Madame Petit had an idea born of a 
peculiarity of her husband's, amd she whis- 
pered instructions to her lord. who then 
pulled himself together and went out into 
the hall 

“What want you here, varle” 


sa 


Ribald Classic 
а crafty 


constable 


confounded 


“Third Ten Tales” of Balzac 


from the 


m 
R. B. DANCE 


“1 must search your bedchamber for а spy 
of the English suspected of a plot of diaboli 
cal darkness. 

The English are capable of the lowest of 
deeds," Adolphus agreed amiably, “yet none 
of these scoundrels is here in my keep. I am 
entertaining а lady of the French court,” he 
added in a confidential tone. 

Nevertheless, my sire, I must proceed, 
id aside!” 

Adolphus shrugged. "You may search, my 
dear Petit, but do me one favor. Allow me to 
cover the head of this lady, the fairest of the 
French." 

This was indeed agreeable to the. provost, 
who was quite flattered, in fact, A few mi 
utes Liter he entered the chamber, looked up 


St 


the chimney, opened the cupboard and 
peeked under ihe bed, Then he began to 
scrutinize the person on the bed, the face 


down, a sheet wrapped around the head, but 
otherwise completely unadorned. 

“My lord.” said Petit after some ru 
tions, “this could be an Engl 
have flesh as white and soft as women, 1 
know because I have hanged a score of them 
in the courtyard. without 


Petit did, and when he turned 
around he regarded with popeved admi 
ion the magnificent form on tl 
lying on its back, shect still enwrapped about 
the head 

“This is nor an Englishman, 
alter some deliberation 

Adolphus congratulated him on his perspi 
cacity and the provost went off to the kin 
nd constable and reported fully what had 
happened. "No doubt about her being a lady 
of the court. T verified this fact both over and 
under.” 

Ribald, indeed, was his majesty's chortle. 
You idiot without memory. You don’t even 
know the finest of features possessed by your 


bed, now 


d Petit 


own wife 
“sire, 
тоо fr 


said Petit, “those features I hold in 
ata respect to gaze upon them like a 


“Old fool,” cried the constable, whose 
grand plan had collapsed like a tent in the 
winds, “that was your wife!” 

At this unpleasant. news, Perit bolted from 
the court and in less time than it would take 
1 beggar to empty the poor box, he had 
ched his own dwelling. 1 his wife was not 
there, he would return to the keep of Adol- 
phus and the latter's vile blood would run as 
that of a goat. But Madame Petit was in her 
bed. asleep, for that wise lady had made even 
faster tracks back to her nuptial couch. Our 
Petit, thus reassured, began to unharness in 
haste, for his adventure had aroused hin 
more than somewhat, He crawled 
the goos-feather down and related (o his 
spouse the night's work. At once she began to 
moan, "Mon petit, will you love me again 
wr observing so mimnely the finest Tes 
tures of a courtesan of. France?" 

"We shall see," said Petit. "Ma ch 
shall sec.” 


beneath 


ie, we 


—Retold by Robert McNear Bg 145 


food By THOMAS MARIO movers rPICURES HAVE A PERFECT DEFINITION OF THEATER. It's the link con- 


necting the snack before to the supper afterward. The idea of a pre-theater appeasement rather than a full trench- 
erman's dinner bolted down i 30 curtain gets а big hand from performers and audiences alike 
And for generations the midnight supper after the show has been one of the most gracious of all ways to entertain. 

H your theater party is to be really successful, you'll first pick a play cued to the tastes of your guests. You'll offer 
them the prolog of cocktails and the kind of food that takes the edge off their hunger but still leis them sit through 
Ionesco or Beckett with a clear head. Your potables should allow them to roll in the aisles with Auntie Mame rather 
than with the alterelleets of five martinis. When the show's over, your party will taxi to the armchair comfort of 
own hearth, where fine Iood and fine wine will help make a bomb tolerable and а superb play bewitching. 
In the fall and winter there are all kinds of dialogs for fireplace suppers, but none more engaging than the chatter 


time to make the 


you 


over cast, staging, sets and story. 

While one man can manage this kind of three-stage party, there are times when dual hosti 
first producer gets the tickets and is responsible for the e 
collabor 


g works out best. The 
rly snack and for taxi or limousine service, The second 
Mitertheater supper and drinks, Of course, the division of labor needn't follow 
ions literally. But it's the one we've found best for intimate theater parties of six to twelve people. If 
you belor theater subscription club, members naturally take ruins throughout the season in hosting the party. 

p. mains where the nightly ordeal by traffic becomes just too much lor 
gathering at the twilight hour. When they're caught in this kind of nightmare alley, they can only forgo the pre- 
[ ray that Fate will get them to the show on time, and then gather 
turgy of the bullet table. But if your party can possibly be mustered before the show, it not only keeps the crowd 
moving as a happy unit but makes the whole evening's junket infinitely morc festive. 


tor hosts the leisurely 


these speci 


to 


п de 


m 


rent 


urage may live in urba 


afterward lor the unhurried drama- 


ninary snack, 


When you plan a roster for a theater party, remember that the number of couples invited shouldn't exceed the 


table space and chi 


s providing easy ancho 


кє. We've found that the best day for puting vemptation in the way 
iinday, Host and those who are hosted. are often caught up in the late office groove during the 


ol your party is Š 


week. Saturdays, too, give you all the line you need for exploring gourmet empori 
sembling all the ingredients of an opulent supper. 

fronically, the scene ol action that bugs every hosts soul the first time he runs a threestage theater party isn't 
the sumptuous supper alter the show but the small snack before. Bachelors in the land of plenty still seem to suller 
from а pronounced phobia of not appeasing the belly slave that theoretically ved man about town. 
in counuics such as Spain or Greece, where the dinner hour normally begins at 10 or 11 at night, no such. problem. 
exists. The Greek planning a theater party wouldn't dream of compressing his evening dinner into any kind of time- 
table, Before the theater, the Greek will dawdle over a small sca of olives, a plate of sh-roe salad or slices of feta 
k bread and butter, He'll take a glass of wine or р ps zed kind 
h we Americans could well emulate. In this country the question of what to serve for the pre- 
theater snack can be » very practical terms: Serve the first course of a dinner. Would you normally oller 
cherry-stone clams and an onion soup, a mulligatawny or a cheese fondue? Present any ol these, and the first mouth- 
ful will assuage the pangs of hunger. Another delighilul solution is the smorzebrod, or Danish open sandwiches. 
The beauty of the snorrebrod is that it can be contracted or expanded to meet the needs of any hungry circle. It's 
eaten with knife and fork. Although the kitchen procedure for making smørrebrød is the easiest in the world, there 
are several ground rules that must be faithfully followed. The bread should be freshly baked. thinly sliced and 
generously spr i 
sliced tomato to smoked cod liver with scrambled eggs, 10 raw chopped steak with onions and capers. W sliced meats 
are on the bill, they should be prime in quality, well chilled and freshly sliced. TI 


ms and liquor shops, and Hor as- 


ules every c 


s 


cheese, some з owo or two. It's the most ci 


of dawdling, wh 


answered 


ul with sweet butter. Toppings may include апус from boneless sardines and 


in your lard 


snackmaster must Took to the 
logic of the clock. It will tell him that the moment has arrived when he must tap men on the shoulder, take women 


by the arm and tell them that the scene is now shifting to the theater. 


In planning your after-th 


er menu, your first rule is to avoid duplications of the pa 


rty of the first part. If there 


were lobster cocktails beforehand, you won't serve coquille of seafood to the 
per prog 


ery, dishes that require elabor 


aptive crowd at midnight. Let your sup- 


fit the changed me 


əd with dishes of substance such as the filet mignon below. Ave 


d avant-garde cook- 


ion pieces that try to steal the scene from the show 


e 


ving, and food conversa 


itsell. Last-m 


зше preparation, e 


n in your black tic, is perfectly feasible, provided all behind-thescenes work has 
been put out of the way belorehand, and your labors are limited to simple sautéing and reheating ol sauces. Finally, 
il you can contract for the services of a Jeeves, you'll find him invaluable for setting up the are and 
[or checki 


регу, silvery 


champagne coole 


g room temperatures, lighting the fire and all the other (continued on page 204) 


THEATRICAL FARE 


producing a culinary smash in two acts: the snack before, the supper after 


PLAYBOY 


148 


FIRSTAID FOR FREDDIE 


novel on the terrace, 
t there would 


who was reading 
but something told him ıl 
be lile profit and en 
this. Most of his conversation consisted 
ol anecdotes of his murky past, and 
Connie was not а good audience lor 
these. He decided on consideration to 
look up his brother Clarence. with whom 
pleasure (o exchange 
Û (hat mild and dreamy 
library staring fixedly at 


ertuinment in 


the 


peer i 
nothing 

“Ah, there you are, 
said, and Lord. Emsworth sat 


E 


Clarence.” he 
p with a 


ering 


‘Oh, it's you, G 5 
“None other. Whats ihe maner, 
ig on your mind 

The symptoms are unmistakable, À man 


whose soul is at rest does not leap like a 
nymph surprised while bathing when 
somebody tells him he's there. Confule 
1 me. 

Lord Emsworth was only too glad to 
do so. А sympathetic listener was precise- 
ly what he wanted. 

ls Connie.” he said. 
“What's she been doing? 
“Did you hear what she was saying at 


"I didn't come down to breakf: 
“Ah, then you probably missed it 
I 
ppered herring at the 
she told me she was going to get 
rid of Beach." 

“What! Get rid of Beach?” 

He is so slow,’ she said. ‘He wheezes. 
We ought to have a younger, smarter 
butler.” L was appalled. T choked on my 
kippered herring, 

“1 don't blame you. Blandings without 
Be: unthinkable. So is BI lings 
with what she calls a young, smart butler 
at the helm. Good God! 1 can picture 
the sort of fellow she would get, some 
robitic stripling who would turn se 
ersaults and slide down the banisters. You 
must put your foot down. Clarence." 

UM he, me? Lord n. 
The idea seemed to him too bizare 

consideration. He was, as has been 
ster Con- 
rious woman 


Well. right in the middle of the mca 


hos 


said. 


mswor 


for 
said. a mild, dreamy man 
stance a forceful and im 
modeled on the lines of the late Cleopat- 
ra, Nominally he was the master of the 
house and, as such, entitled to exercise 
the presidential, but in practice Conuie 
ys law. at the way 
him wear a top hat at the 
ge school treat. He had reasoned 
1 pleaded, pointing out ü 


word was alwa Loo! 
she made 


nua 


t sort a simple fishing hat 
more suitable, but every 


tivity of uh 
would be 
r when August came around there he 


ye 


(continued from page 113) 


was, balancing the beastly thing on his 
head again and just asking the children 
in the tea tent to threw rock cakes at it. 

71 cant pur my foot down with 
Connie.” 

“Well, 1 can, and I'm going to. Fire 
Beach, indeed! After eighteen. years di 
voted service. The ideas monstrous.” 
He would, of course, receive 
"sion." 
“Ivy no good her thinking she can 
gloss it over with any talk about pen- 
sions. Wrap it up as she may, the stark 
fact remains that she's planning to give 
him the bum’s rush. She must not be al- 
lowed to do this frightful thing. Good 
heavens, you might just as well fire the 
Archbishop of Canterbury.” 

He would have spoken further, but at 


pe 


this moment there came from rhe sta 
outside the dumping of feet, an- 
nouncing (har Freddie was back. [rom 
the Fanshawes and on his w to his 
room. Lord Emsworth winced. Like so 
many aristocratic fathers, he was allergic 


10 younger sons; and since going to live 
in America, Freddie had acquired a 
brisk, go-getter jumpiness which jarred 
upon him. 
Frederick.” he said with a shudder, 
and Gally started. 

"ve gor a telegra 
L "Fd better take it up to him 

"Do," suid Lord Emsworth. “And I 
think T will go and have a look ar mw 
lowers.” 

He left the room and, making for the 
rose garden, pottered slowly ro and fro, 
snifing at its contents. B was a proce 
dure that as a vule gave him great ple: 
ure, but today his heavy heart found no 
solace in the scent of roses. Listlessly he 
brary and took a f 
it even pig 


n for Freddie,” he 


sa 


vor 


returned to the 
ite pig book from its shelf. B 


books were no palliative. The thought 
of Beach fading from the Blindings 
scene, if a man of his bulk could be said 


10 lade, prohibited. concentration. 

He had sunk into a somber reverie, 
when it was interrupted by the entrance 
of the subject of his gloomy medit 

“Pardon me, m'lord ” said Be 
ne to ask if you would 
smoking room and 


Galahad desires 
мер down to th 
speak io him." 
“Why can't he come up here? 
“He has sprained his ankle, nrlord, 
He and Mr. Frederick fell downstai 
"Oh?" said Lord Emsworth, not par 
ticularly interested, Freddie was always 
doing odd things. So was Galahad. "How 
did that happen: 
Mr. Gal d that he 
handed Mr. Frederick a telegram. Mr 
Frederick, having opened and perused 
it, uttered a sharp exclamation, reeled, 
clutched at Mr. Galahad, and they both 
fell downstairs. Mr. Frederick, too, 
ied his ankle. He has retired.” 


forms mc 


has 


Bless my soul. Are they in pain 
1 gather that the agony has to some 
extent abated. They have been receiving 
tment from the kitchen maid. She is 
а brownie.” 

"She's a what?” 

7A brownie, m'lord. It is a species of 
female boy scout. They instructed 
а the fundamentals of L 


are 


st 
“Eh? First aid? Oh, you mean first 
aid,” said Lord Emsworth, reading be- 


1 that sort 


tween the lincs, 
of thing, what?” 
Precisely, m'lord. 

By the time Lord. Emsworth 
the smoking room the brownie had com. 
pleted her ministiations aud gone back 
to her Screen Gems. Gally was lying on а 
sofa, looking not greatly disturbed by his 
accident. He was smoking a cigar. 

“Reach tells me 127 said 
Lord Emsworth. 

A stinker,” Gally assented. “As who 
wouldn't when an ass of a nephew grabs 
him at the top of two lights of stairs?” 

“Beach seems to think Frederick's ac 
tion was caused by some bad news in the 


Bandages 


reached 


telegram you gave to him. 
Thats right. In was from Aggie.” 
"Aggie? 
“His vile: 


“1 thought he Frances." 

“No, Niagara.” 

“Whar a peculiar name." 

“А gush of sentiment on the part of 
her parents. They spent the honeymoon 
at Niagara Falls." 

“АҺ. yes. 1 have heard of Мар; 
Is. People go over them in barrels, do 
they not? Now there is a thing I would 
пог care 10 do myself. Most uncomforta 
ble, 1 should imagine. though no doubt 
one would get used to it in time. WI 
was her telegram so disturbing?” 
"Because she says she's coming here 
aud will be with us the day a 
tomorrow. 

“L see no objection to that.” 
Freddie does, and TH iell you why. 
He's gone and given her dog to Valerie 


name w 


"Who is Valerie 
he daughter of Colonel. Fansl 
of Marling Hall, the tallyho and v 
halloo chap. Haven't you met himi 
No." said Lord Emsworth, who neve 
mer anyone if he could help it. "Bur 
why should. Frances objec. to Frederick 
giving this young woman a de 

"P didn't say а dog, I said her dog 
Her personal Alsatian, whom she 
10 distraction. However, that could be 
staightened out, D imagine, with a few 
kisses and a remorseful word or 
Valerie Fanshawe were a girl with a pasty 
face and spectacles. but unfortum 
she isn't. Her hair is golden, her eyes 
blue, and years of huntin’, shootin’ and 
fishin’, not to mention swimmin’, tennis 
playin’ and golfin’, have rendered her 
(continued on page 198) 


anshawe 


loves 


two il 


article By PIETRO DI DONATO 


în which the author clashes with hemmgway, 
engages т a sexual marathon and is given a sudden 
sampling of байма brutality m pre-war havana 


1939. AY ^ тата in. Havana's Floridita bar. 1 хи with Hemin 


His companion was a manuishly dressed. blonde with a magazine 
figure and a neoclassic bur hard lace, She would have looked 
right astride a jumper 


Hemingway resembled an altered, jowly tomei with mouse 
clenched between. teeth. Prom the massive, swarthy guy came а 
small. high-pitched peacock's voice. We exchanged amenities while 
instinctively not (a 


ing lo each other 

A litle beggar girl, leading her blind grandfather, cime in 10 
sell white roses. When she approached Hemingway, he shrugged 
and said, “Tiny d. hier, E have not money for bread.” 
‘Tears of pity came into her eyes. She pinned her best flower on 


ifi. You'll 


his lapel and said, “I give you this Madonna rose as 
see; it will bring vou good luck! 
Hemingway pur a large bill im (continued on page 190) 


ILLUSTRATION By GEORGE SUYEOKA 


145 


ARTHUR KNIGHT 


and 
HOLLIS ALPERT 


PART ELEVEN 


Sex Stars of the Fe 


the private lives and public images of 
the love goddesses and matinee idols 
who ruled the screen during the decade 
of the pinup and the he-man hero 


vuROvGHOUT тик FoRTIEs, while most of the 
world’s population was preoccupied with total 
war amd its devastating aftermath, the most 
popular star of Hollywood's movies was a blon- 
dined dream girl of rather everyday prettiness 
named Betty Grable. Today it is a bit difficult 
to comprehend her popularity, if only because 
Hollywood's musical films no longer flourish; 
but at one point in the decade, the production 
of such pastiches amounted to more than a third 
of the studios’ total output. Thus, to understand 
Miss Grable's preeminence over other more g 
orous and alluring bundles of femininity, one 
must also be aware of the national preference 
for what would sirike us now as somewhat in- 
sipid musical entertainments. No less important, 
during the War isell leggy pinups of Beny 
adorned the bunks and barracks of vast num- 
bers of our fighters for a more democratic world. 
In an odd way, she was a suitable representative 
of democracy. There was nothing aristocr 
about her except her earnings. She was shrewd 
nd ambitions, but hardly cultivated; chirpy 
1 bright, but hardly brainy. More recent wit- 
ers, in assessing her appeal, have claimed that 
she possessed about as much mystery 
res in an lowa diner. 

The above verdict, although not calculated to 
start a stampede toward the tallcorn state, nev- 
ertheless sums up the basic appeal not only of 
Betty but of many of the substitute love objects 
of the сапу Forties. To the millions of men in 
amps and combat zones, this girlnextdoor or- 
dinariness seemed somehow more real, more de- 
sirable, more attainable than those diaphanous 
darlings of their peacetime year 
ions of the time furthered this desexualization 
of daydreams. A boxy look in the shoulders 
Is look like members of a football 


tic 


as a wait 


gs. The fash 


made most gi 
squad, despite the challenging thrust of the 


breasts; and the various Service unifor 


they 
ohen wore seemed to emphasize the fact that 
sex was for spare moments only. that mili 
aims rather than passions must be satisfied first 

During this period, as we shall sec, Ann 
She: Carole Landis and Marie McDonald 
"Тһе Oomph Girl." “The Ping Girl” and 
“The Body,” respectively —came and went; and 
though they had all the sexual attributes that 
any girl might need or want, they existed 
primarily for show, like goodies temptingly laid 
out in a shopwindow, They could be looked at 
but not touched 


S 


Чап 


So it was with Beuy Grable, who, despite her 


M 


АРМ] 
PICK OF THE PINUPS: Top—Foremost of the Forties? female sex stars, leggy Betty Grable was the GI's favorite pinup girl; Rita Hayworth began re- 
ceiving 06000 fan letters a weck after Life published this famous picture of the lissome Latin beauty in 1941. Center—Aquabatic Esther Williams beamed and 
backstroked her way to film fame; peckaboo-tressed Veronica Lake generated as much electricity with one sloe eye as most sexpots did with heo; a durable femme 
fatale, Hedy Lamarr was never sultrier than as the seductress Tonddayo in “White Cargo.” Above—In “The Outlaw,” Jane Russell's alpine contours 
“hung over the picture like a thunderstorm,” wrote a reproving judge; “Oomph Girl” Am Sheridan embodied a hard-boiled no-nonsense approach to sex. 


To Have 
di ane» 


WHAT DID YOU DO IN THE WAR, DADDY?: With 
every able-bodied mate serving in the Armed Forces, it fell upon 
Hollywood's ineligible stars to don khaki and win the War on 
screen. How could we lose with square-jawed fighting men such as 
Errol Flynn on our side—taking time out from swashbuckling 
swordplay to demoralize the enemy on land and sea, and in the 
air? For the moviegoing public, Van Johnson epitomized the 
freckle-faced boy next door who returns Stateside a gee-whiz hero 
—as he did in “ Thirty Seconds Over Tokyo,” to true-tlue house- 
wife Phyllis Thaxter. Meanwhile, back on the heme front, a 
scrawny 4-F named Frank Sinatra, already one of the decade's 
major sex stars as a teenagers’ idol on radio and records, was 
making a name for himself in escapist movie musicals as a crooner- 
comedian; all of them, ironically, ended with the other guy—in 
this case, Gene Kelly in “Anchors Atwcigh’—getting the girl. 


aura of a girl who had been around, remained uncon- 
querable in the clinches until wedding bells were 
included in the proposition. In fact, so r bly 
pure and chaste was she that the plot ploy of one 
picture had her walking out on the eve of her wed- 
ding simply on the suspicion that her fancé was 
marrying her solely for her abilities as an entertainer. 
About Betty, one film reviewer of the period said that 
she was a vision “of the little girl next door turned 
vaude villian.” 


This vision, as it happened, was very near the truth. 
Born in 1916, the daughter of a St. Louis stockbroker 
and a stagestruck mother, Betty was 
of the then-familiar type who did imitations of AI Jol- 
son, tap-danced and tooted on the saxophone. By the 
time she was 7, she was dispensing these talents via ra- 
dio; at 18, she was hustled by her mother to Hollywood. 
and enrolled in two dancing academies and one dra- 
matic school. At 14, a well-developed nymphet, she was 
g with a jazz band. At 15, she was given a con- 
tract by RKO and put in the chorus of a musical, Let's 
Go Places, then sent packing when it was discovered 
that California child-labor laws had been flouted by 
her employment. Soon after, however, she became the 
first chorine selected as а Goldwyn Girl for Whoopee, 
and for the remainder of the Thi 
from studio to studio as a perenni 
then regarded as just another cute blonde, suitable 


fant prodigy 


BOGEY: Mythologized since his death into the apotheosis of 
the existentialist antihero, the disenchanted loner who sticks his 
neck out for nobody—least of all for а dame—Humphrey Bogart 
defined and refined his tough-guy image in the two dozen films he 
made during the decade, Top: As shamus Sam Spade in “The 
Maltese Falcon,” he falls for clicnt Mary Astor, then finds out 
she's a killer and coldly hands her over to the cops. In “Саѕа- 
blanca,” Bogart drinks lo forget Ingrid Bergman, and asks Sum, 
the piano player at Rick's Café Américain, not to play the song 
that reminds him of ha—" As Time Goes By.” Center: Portray- 
ing a hard-bitten gunrunner in To Have and Have Not,” Bogey 
finally met his match (on screen and off) in laconic Lauren Bacall, 
debuting as the ultrecool woman of the world whose classic 
invitation If you want anything, all you have to do is 
whistle” —he accepts with unaccustomed warmth. Bottom: Paired 
again in “The Big Steep,” a Philip Marlowe private-cveful, 
Bogey and Baby saturated the screen, wrote one critic, “with a 
sullen atmosphere of sex.” As a cynical war veteran in “Dead 
Reckoning,” he sparred with another sexy vixen (Lizabeth Scott). 


halfback hero. For promotional purposes, 
this period, however, she energeticilly posed for more leg ап than any other actress, with the result that college dormitories 
м were soon abloom with her likeness. For this reason more than any other, by the end of the Thirties, she had become 
s the pulchritudinous possessor of "the m 
espairing of ever making it big in Hollywood—on sereen, 
ppearance tour,” and making sure t 
stage or oll. Wherever she went, the local papers were delighted to reproduce 
story goes, Darryl Zanuck of 20th Century-Fox picked up his newspaper, saw 
company. Almost at the same time, she w 
a Lady. Zanuck, having no immediate plans for the girl, generously allowed her a Broadway stint of eight months, during which time 


across 
familiar 


— Betty took to the vaudeville circuits in 1939, terming the 
t her photogenic legs were a prominent feature of every apy 
shapely image—so much so that one morning, the 
picture of Betty and promptly signed her for his 


"personal: 


(cc, on 


s tapped. by director Buddy de Sylva for a role in Cole Porter's stage musical Du Barry Was 


: Opposite—By THO, the style in sex stars had changed from the handsome hero played by Robert Taylor in “Waterloo Bridge" (in 1910, opposite 
Vivien Leigh) to a rugged new breed exemplified by Robert Mitchum, Taylor e nemesis in “Undercurrent.” Tough guys Burt Lancaster and Kirk Donglas also 
emerged as sinewy new stars—-Lancaster (with Ava Gardner) in “The Killers,” Douglas (with Ruth Roman) in "Champion." Despite cave-man histrionics, 
Victor Mature led the becfcake brigade. As Cary Стат proved in “E Was a Male War Bride," however, the decade made room for she-men as well as hemin. 
THE LOVERS: Арес Емар stars such as Clark Gable and Lana Turner, a torrid team in “Honky Tonk,” began to be challenged by new romantic 
leads like Gregory Peck and Jennifer Jones, co-stars of "Duel in the Sun.” Though their reign ended in the last half of the decade, strong-willed leading ladies 
continued to dominate the screen—and their co-stars—throughout the early Forties. Rita Hayworth typified the time as a templress wha destroys Tyrone Power's 
marriage and career in “Blood aud Sant.” On the saintly side, Greer Garson proved no less a match for Walter Pidgeon in “Mrs. Miniver." In the first of 
the forcign films to compete with Hollyzeoed overseas, new sex stars were born: James Mason, as the sadistic dilettante who mesmerizes Ann Todd in“ The 
Seventh Veil; earthy Vittorio Gassman, as the killer-con man of “Bitter Rice”; and his co-star Silvana Mangano, first of the post-War Continental sexpots. 


SUGAR AND SPICE: An ambivalent decade, the Forties found several stars altering their images to match the metamorphosing 
moral climate, Among them was a Brooklyn-born socialite with the cxotic beauty of ап Oriental princess: Gene Tierney. Portraying 
an Arab girl in “Sundown” (above lefi), she projected a provocative but unapproachable otherworldliness. D “Shanghai Gesture,” 
by contrast, she played the debunched daughter of а Chinese dragon lady. Another quick-change artist, Linda Darnell began the decade 
as a virginal heroine in films like “Blood and Sand” (belo left). By 1947 she had graduated to such erotic starring roles as that of 
“Forever Amber.” Though she escaped the great London fire in that sexpotboiler, che was less lucky as a concubine burned at the 
stake in “Anna and the King of Siam"—a part tragically prophetic of her own death in а suburban-Chicago fire 19 years later. 


„= a СЕЕ о Ea 
E | 


as 
` 


AACN 


WSS 


5 


aN 


SCANDAL: Real-life notoriety can e or break a movie star, 
In the case of Errol Flynn, ill fame earned him new laurels. His 
much-publicized trial for statutory rape in 1942—he was finally 
acquitted —merely entrenched his reputation as a legendary 
“swordsman” Unlike that of Flynn. Charlie Chaplin's sex life— 
bared by a sensational paternity suit und a charge of violating the 
Mann Act—was inconsistent with his movie image, and the 
public turned against him. Embittered, he made “Monsieur 
Verdoux ironically, portraying a homicidal: bluebeard—then 
Left the country in the early Fifties, to take up residence abroad. A 
similar fate was visited upon Ingrid Bergman, Though sh 
had played several earthy roles—including that of a Cockney 
trollop who writhes ecstatically, in * Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde.” 
as the voluptuous star of the mad doctor's sexual fantasies— 
American moviegoers identified her with. such pristine parts as 
the nun in * The Bells of St. Mary's.” In 1949, when she abdi- 
cated her private vole as wife and mother to become first the star 

in “Stromboli” (buttam — then the mistress and finally the wife 
of Malian director Roberto Rossellini, the U.S. press and pub- 
lic retaliated by Uackballing her and her films until. 14 


she landed on the cover of Life (Decem 
ber 1939). She returned to Hollywood 
just as the Forties began, replacing. that 
other favorite Zanuck blonde, Alice Faye, 
opposite Don Ameche in Down Argentine 
Way. Alice, it seems, felt that she had 
been teamed with Ameche just а little 
ten, Beny made a hit in her stead. 

Shorüy therealier, Zanuck co-starred 
the wo blondes in Tm Pan Alley, and 
the critics everywhere discovered that both 
Beny's talents and her legs were the su- 
perior. Time's anonymous reviewer vir 
tually drooled: “She gyrated through a 
harem scene,” he wrote. “dad brilliantly 
in sequined bra and panties, her legs 
shining and sinuous beneath transp: 
pantaloons.” Since the plots of the n 
in which she cavorted were seldom more 
than pat little love triangles. critics rarely 
bothered. to detail them. But notice was 
waviably taken of Вецу. Noting the 
mean and snaky wiggle” she pur into 
her dancing in Coney Island (1913), the 
same reviewer wroic, “When Miss Grable 
agitates her torso, in a Technicolored. 
pink jacket and short mauve skirt, it is 
not an exhibition which is likely to lull 
you чө sleep." Technicolor and Betty 
Grable were made for cach other, and 
seldom during the s did a ye 
by without at least wo Grable musicals 
10 lighten and enliven it. 

Ir was not. however, the 260dd mu- 
sieals she made for Fox that have sc- 
cured for her a place in film history so 
much as the pinup photographs fo 
which she continued to pose so assiduous 
ly. Film critic William K. Zinser once 
described the most famous of these while 
fondly recalling bis War experiences for 
the New York Herald Tribune. “The 
picture was a symphony of curves,” he 
wrote. "Miss Grable had been squeezed, 
perhaps sewn. into a white bathing š 
thar was providentially one size too 
small. and she was pecking saucily over 
her shoulder. This shining. product. of 
our way of life was displayed at outposis 
L over the world." Indeed it was. An 
estimated 2,000,000 Servicemen wrote to 
the studio requesting a personal copy of 
the famed still. Throughout the War 
ox socked Grable prints, in var- 
ious delectable poses, in five appropriate 
sizes, ranging from the small. 
heart" size to a monster. print. suitable 
for posting in lockers, barracks and simi- 
Tar semiprivate places, Betty was always 
at she considered her role in 


PLAYBOY 


r go 


years, 


the War efori, and declared herself to 
be "suiedy an enlisted mans girl. 
Very few enlisted men, however, could 


have afforded her upkeep. By 1948 the 
‘Treasury Department. announced that 
Betty was the highestsalaried woman in 
the world. Besides, she was married to 
trumpeter Harry James, then at the ze 
nith of his career. Previously, during the 
Thirties, she had been briefly married to 
the former child film star Jackie Соода 
188 after which she was frequenuy seen with 


screen villain George Raft. It was Raft 
who, one day, t0 please Betty, delivered 
to her doorstep a race horse. tied up i 
ribbons. Rumor was rile that they 
would marry. bur soon her name wa 
being linked with bandleader Artie 
Shaw, then just on the verge of his re- 
markable marital career. When suddenly 
he eloped with Lana Turner, Betty re- 
bit plaintively, "It must have 
come on him very suddenly. 

Although the winsome Miss Grable 
aged prettily, the time сате when shi 
was no longer America’s favorite blonde. 


This did not occur, however, until the 
Fifties were well under way: and Beny 
was more than gracious when it became 


apparent to her that the studio 
grooming Marilyn Mouroe lor her 
vored place in the 
When the wo met pre 
poring in a film together, Beuy told 
her, “Relax, Marilyn. Гуе got mine. Go 
ger yours.” This sage advice, to judge by 
subsequent events. in Hollywood, was 
certainly well taken, 


fa- 
тү Brmament. 


ratory 10 ар- 


ayworth embodied another 
image entirely. Some psychologists like 
to claim that the attraction of Miss H: 
worth’s breasts, always covered but never 
icealed, represented a kind of war- 
time mother fixation; but relatively few 
of our nation’s fighting men pinned up 
pictures of their mother in their bar 
racks. For most Gls, if it wasn't Grable, 
it was Hayworth—and sometimes both. 
Like Betty Grable, la Hayworth had 
been seen in movies of the Thirties to 
distressingly little effect, then suddenly 
blossomed Torth in the Forties. By 1947, 
as Winthrop Sargeant, a writer for Life, 
postrophized her, she had become “a 
red haired girl whose undulant figure and 
speculative smile were becoming as fami 
ir to Americans as those of the M. 
were to the halians of the Ren 


© 


familiarity by placing her likeness on its 
wellcirculated cover a total of four 
mesa record, it might be mentioned, 
equaled only by Franklin Delano Roose- 


velt It was a Life photographer who 
snapped the picture that me ihe 
sccond-mos-wanted pinup of World 


the aforementioned. 
ble. It showed. Rita 
kneeling i 1 wearing an exceed. 
ingly sheer nightgown. So inviting did 
she appear that American males, in and 
out of the Armed Forces, wrote her an 
average of 6000 letters a week during the 
War years, And when, in 1946, the most 
destructive atomic bomb vet. contrived 
was tested at Bikini atoll, it had Rita's 
picture symbolically pasted to. its war 
head. 

By then she years old. of which 
14 had already been spent in show busi- 
nes. Born in 1918, and n 


War Two, after 
study of Betty G 


bed 


по, lile Rita was 
Jackson Heights, New York 
| her father, who ted a troupe called 
The Dancing Cansinos, drafted her into 
the acı. “АН of a sudden," as Cansino 
later explained it to a reporter. “I wake 
up. Jesus! She has a figure! She ain't no 
baby anymore!” For the next three 
years she traveled the nightclub. and 
vaudeville circuits, until eventually she 
reached Tijuana, where a Fox executive, 
Winfield Sheehan, noticed exactly w 
had noticed. Sheehan at once 
gave her а small dancing role in a film 
called Dantes. Inferno; but his larger 
plans for her came to nought when Fox 
erged with 20th Century and Dariyl F 
Zanuck emerged as studio top dog. With 
Sheehan out in the cold, Zanuck cast 
Loretta Young for the tile role in Ra- 
тота. the part that was supposed 10 have 
launched Rii on the road to stardom 

Rita's next fateful meeting. was with 
Eddie Judson, a middle-aged exgambler 
of fatherly appearance who held the 
Hollywood franchise for the deluxe 
Loa Fraschini line of automobiles. Hc 
married the teenaged dancer and took 
her career in hand, deciding as a firs 
step that she must change her name. For 
а time she used Haworth, her mother's 
family name; but this became Hayworth 


after Judson succeeded in convince 
the autocratic head of Columbia Pic 
tures, Harry Cohn, that his young wile 


had star potential. The studio wı 
other changes: Her black h 
formed to the strawberry blonde sha 
with which she eventually became iden 
tified, and her hairli was actually 
shaved back 10 give her a more eleva 
and noble brow. Rita was ready. 
"The tide began to turn in 1941. when 
Warner Bros.” "Oomph Girl" Ann Sher 
idan, struck. for higher wages: Warners 
thrifiily borrowed Rita Hayworth for 
The Strawberry Blonde, costarting her 
with James Cagney and Olivia de Havil- 
land—mainly. ir must be admitted, 
because she had the same Oomphatic 
measurements as Mis Sheridan, for 
whom some costly turmof-the-cemury 
costumes had already been created. Rita 
received such good notices that she was 
t once borrowed again, this time by 
Zanuck. Carole Landis, then being hailed 
as a new blonde bombshell, had refused 
to dye her hair red to play the seductive 
Spanish hussy in the ford g Blood 
and Sand. Rita's hair, however, was 
already dyed red—and her work in the 
film skyrocketed her career. Harry Cohn, 
no mean star maker, realizing that he had 
what in the wade is known as a “hot 
property.” quickly tossed Rita into two 
musicals, with no less a dancing partner 
than Fred Astaire. By the end of 094 
her seductive features. had adorned the 
covers of 93 magazines and, as 
ognition, Louclla P 
med her “The Girl of the Year 
By this time, husband Eddie Јас 


oo faste - Menthol soft flavor 5. 
Try Salem filter cigarettes / 


O Weê к. 1. Reprod Төгө Cempeny, Wiston-Solem, WIE 


PLAYBOY 


169 rope, and while in Paris, c 


was out, and Rita was being squired 
around town by tycoon Howard Hughes 
by the original “beefatke” boy, Victor 
Mature, by singer Tony Martin, and by 
the suave British actor David Niven. It 
was hardly for neglect that she sued Jud 
son for divorce, but for his business hab- 
its; she claimed that “he regarded me as 
an investment.” She won her suit. and 
arry Cohn was said to have generously 
provided Judson with 510,000. divi- 
dend on his "investment." Even more 
generously, Cohn forthwith lavished sev- 
eral million dollas on a stunning Je 
rome Kem musical called Cover (Ghi. 
with Gene Kelly civorting as Rita's 
dancing partner. Tt remains one of her 
best pictures. Meanwhile, in her so- 
alled private life, Rita had met Orson 
Welles, Hollywood's erratic Wunder- 
kind, after his controversial Citizen 
Kane, and they were married in 1943 
union, as someone termed it, of “the 
beaury and the brain.” After two vol 
tile years, and the birth of one daughter, 
Rita and Orson separated: their divorce 
was made final in 1917. 

A Hayworth cult, which lingers to this 
began to spread alter the release of 
the palpitating, melodramatic Gilda i 


1946, starring Rita the Flanguorous 
pawn im a love-hate triangle that in- 
cluded her lover (Glenn Ford) and her 


hust: 
the 


d (George Macready). Ado Kyrou, 
rench author of a bulky study en- 
tited Amour-Eratume et Cinéma, те 
garded Rita as the ultimate pinup of 
the period, although not himself а mem- 
ber of her cult. For him. Rita is less 
symbolic thin symptomatic, and shares 
the waits of such sister pinup queens 
as Bet Grable and Veronica Lake. 
“The pinup,” he wrote, “is big, fleshy, 
beautiful in а stereotyped way, provoc 
ive but a look-alike. She is the opposite 
of the sophisticated woman; in he 
presence man has no problems, because 
she conceals no mystery. She is a head 
wb a body, she never stops smiling, 
she is perfectly wholesome, desperately 
blockheaded." Kyrou regards this pinup 
type ак" " who 
had, unfor лез 
ul derhroned the 
Orson. Welles apparently regarded. his 
former wife as neither. goddess nor pin 
up. While their divorce was still being 
processed, he starred her as a lethal- 
minded sex que Lady from Shang- 
and at the film's finale, he had he 
shot 10 death by her husband in a bizarre 
ment park's mirror maze, Welles 
asisted that she cut her hair short 
for the piaure and dye it blonde. Harry 
Cohn, whose Columbia studio under- 
te Lady from Shanghai, wailed over 
“Everybody knows.” he 
ng 


wr 
the desecration 
cried, “that the most beautiful ıt 
about Rita was her hair." 

After the film and 
both been completed, Ri 


the divorce had 
led for Eu- 
me down 


a 


with bronchitis. It proved a fateful ill- 
ness, for she left the City of Light to 
take up residence in a villa on the Rivi- 
where society arbiter Elsa Maxwell 
was currently holding sway. Elsa intro- 
duced Rita to Aly Khan, the world’s 
richest playboy, who was soon saving 
his new love was "like Venus, only with 
а soul and. sweetness.” The newshounds 
took full notice when Rita followed Aly 
10 Spain, and even more when Alv fol 
lowed Rita to Hollywood. where she 
nest made The Loves of Carmen. Th 
were muuierings of disapprobarion at 
псш meetings when Rita, after 
a 


the two took up residence in Switzerland 
and were joined there by Aly's two sons 
by his frst marriage (which was, 
dentally, still in effect). The Genera 
Federation of Women's Clubs. rotally 
паде by this blithe disregard for con- 
vention, passed a resolution to boycott 
Rita's films. 

Their wrath was somewhat appeased 
when Aly's divorce came through and he 
and Riti were married in a French civil 
ceremony, Rita renouncing her Cathol- 
icim and turning Moslem for the occa- 
She abo stated that shew: 
through with the movies, since her im- 
age had become a d thing to 
Aly’s Moslem followers. it wasn't 
long befor 


Bur 
c she had tired of this form of. 


to mention ihe 
band's position 
binh ıo a 
Moslem girl, Y she left Switzer- 
lad—and Aly—for the United States, 
where, in a few more pictures, the public 
showed a willingness to gaze upon the 
Moslem princess. She separated from Aly 
in 1951, was divorced soon after, and was 
reputed to have obtained a $3,000,000 
seulement from him. By the carly 
1950s, the Hayworth vogue was all but 
over, although Miss Sadie Thompson, 
released in 1953, included one feverish 
scene that raised а good many sophisti- 
cared eyebrows. Rita. as Sadie. the only 
woman in a tropical bar filled with 
sweating belted out. The Heat 
1s On. While she did an orgiastic dance, 
they surrounded her, shaking their beer 
bottles to the rhythm until they foamed 
cover like vast ejaculations. This is prob: 
bly the only occasion that Blatz beer h 
ever been used as an erotic symbol 
inema or else 
was once ter being called 
ica’s love goddess, what it was like 
ded by millions of fans. 


not tours 


the 

ui 
Ame 
to be so reg 
Golly.” she replied after some reflec 
tion, ^I guess any girl would love to be 
а goddess.” 


the wartime pinup parade 
was the torrid, top-heavy Jane Russell— 
and this was all the more remarkable bi 

ery few people had 


even scen her on the screen. The first of 


the movies mammarian prod she 
made her debut in Howard Hughe 
The Quiluw-—which, although comple 
ed in 1043. promptly encountered censor 


ulties that Hughes had no time to 
straighten out until after the War was 
over. Meanwhile. however, through the 
tireless effors of veteran press agent 
Russell Birdwell, Jane's sultry face and 
astonishing figure were made familiar 
through frequent exposure in the mas- 


circulation magazines, The fact that in 
such "arr" she was invariably posed in 
revealing, low-cut blouses undoubtedly 


swayed many editors to choose her brand. 
of checsecake over 1 offered by bener- 
known but less provocative young ac 
tresses. Actually, it was a photo of her 
face, not her figure, that piqued Hughes 
interest while he was searching for an 
unknown to play the lead in his forth- 
coming Western epic. Jane, а dem 
assistant at the time, had done some pho 
tographic modeling on the side, and 
few of the results were brought to 
Hughes auention, He saw enough in 
the face to ask her to come in: and he 
saw enough else, after he had screen- 
tested her, to sign the girl 10 а seven-year 
contract, slating her for the role of Rio 
in The Outlaw. 

Bur long before that first appearance— 
the filming was marked by several delays 
and battles with the Production Code 
Administration (see Part IX of this sc- 
ries, in the August 1900 PLAY Boy: 
began to get the Birdwell builds 
christened boats," she later recalled. “I 
judged baby contests, and | sprawled 
on the beach for photographers, always 
iu the blouse with the low-cut neck.” As 
to the frequent exposure of her own 
special build-up—38 inches—she im- 
plied that the photographic fraternity 
had taken unfair advantage of her inno- 
cence. Still under 90 at the time, she said. 
“1 wasn't used ro people who worked 
angles all the time. They were smiling 
sweetly and kibiving. When they asked 
me to bend over and pick up two pails of 
water, | bent over and picked up the 
pails, They must have taken a thousand 
shots before I realized.” Even after she 
ized. however, variants on the pail 
picking obviously continued, for Bird- 
well managed to flood the country with 
portraits of Jane that laid maximum 
emphasis upon the alpine contours of 
her upper torso. But if. as а result of his 
ministration, Jane Russell suddenly be 
с big. it is also true that bosoms in 
general got bigger—in à cinematic sense 
at least. To quote Murray Schumach, au 
thor of The Face on the Cutting Room 
Floor, “Jane Russell's breasts were to 


Hollywood what Eve's а 
Meanwhile, Jane remained a sex star 

^. Hughes, holding onto 
her contract, refused to allow her to 
another film until he was certain 
(continued on page 164) 


iple was to sin." 


without а mov 


“When you reach my age, Chadborne, it's the 
little things that count.” 


161 


162 


BILL DANA four’s company 


FORMER who made “My name Jose 
t part of the Amer comedy 
faces, has. cornered 


BESIDES BEING THE 
Jimer 


эсеп 
enough credits as a writer, producer and enucprencur 
10 rank him as a quadruple-threat man, Dana the writer 


о served as head saibe for his own weekly TV show 
and last season's video spool Alice in Wonderland (Or, 
What's a Nice Kid Like You Doing in a Place Like This?) 
arned his first yuk turning out gags for fellow comics 
Don Adams and Steve Allen back in the © . In 
fact, it was Bill who came up with Adams origin 

Vould you believe" joke “It was for a TV skit called 
“The British in nd Don had just 
been confronted by the infamous Surat Khan, who wasn't 
about to believe that his Thagee warriors were surrounded 
by Be Lancers. So I had Don v, "Well, would 
you believe Gunga Din on а donkey” ” In his role as 
businessman. Dana recently ad-ventured into the mad, 
ad Ave world by teaming up with «топу Adams 
("No one can accuse me of not getting Smart’) to 
form an agency that already boasts а sizable bill 
"Though. busy diversify still finds t 
to retin top executive billing at ihe West Coast offices 
of the CIA (California International Artists: a talent 
g wes for the Tijuana Brass) 
Productions, Lid. (which produces (he 
ddition, Bill the producer is the 

"s big new Milton Berle Show 
n upcoming José Jimenez TV cartoon series. Nor 
s Bill the performer forgotten the shy little guy who 
helped make this financial boom possible. “Jose 
record, The Jewish Astronaut, José Jim 
quips the always-on Dana, “should be one jell of a jit. 


ROMAN POLANSHI pole vaulting 


DESPITE THE RELATIVE ANONY 
lists turning out movies in post-Wai ern Europe, 
old Roman Polansl n estimable product of 
ic Polish National Film Academy at Lodz—has needed 
s and tly executed. feature 
films to establish ai 
of the first тап 
»prenticehip w 


ary on these shores of the 


tion by walking olf with highest honors at the Venice 
Film Festival for his first feature-length ellort, Алије in 


the Water. Given leave to gamer additional laurek on 
the capitalist side of the hon С Bolshevism’s boy 
wonder went to London, where he won over any remain- 


jg skeptics among Western critics with his virtuoso 
mdling of the Hitchcock-style thriller Repulsion. His 
third and most rec mph, Cul de Sac, à British-based 
found him once again headed down the 
e as the 1966 Berlin Festival's f 
ws new lo 
can claim the added distinction of having written the o 
filmscripts for all of his screen successes to dare and 
soon supply further evidence of his consummate 
moviemaking skills when he stars in another self-scripied 
«Гоп. а horror spool. The Vampire Killers. But. rather 
than vest on his ie credits, the diligent director 
enm writer cim-actor. is spending his few free hours com 
pleting production schedules for his nest film, Cherchez la 
for a Toril g gig as guest director 
the Old Vic. Accused of being intlexibly opinionated 
("Because 1 am sure"), Polanski need nor delend his 
opinions; his finely wrought films speak for themselves. 


nem: 


Femme, and р 


hi 
i 
[^1 
? 


К сэс» 


ALAN ARKIN /ow-key £0 success 


IN THE шт вим The Russians Are Coming The Rus- 
sians Are Coming. the jittery Soviet sailor says to a star 
ied couple va on а New Engh 


edi 


32, is a master con 
s has quietly built h 
meer of impressive proportions, Arkin made his 
ional debut in 1059 with the Compass Players" 
improvisational theater in St. Louis and joined Chica 
Second City revue a year later. Then it was From the 
Second City in New York, a few minor roles on and 

ü: through to star billing 
inter Laughing. Ark 


who, over thc 


last seven y 
and a 
prole 


dic 


fash g Broadway production of 
п. piling critical accolades 
ability to plea 
his movie care 


hilarious short. That's 


on top of popul 


critics and public alike also characterize 
where not only The Russians but a 


Me. made with Andy Duncan, is currently riding h 
Last month, Ar b Murray Schisgal 
to open ABCOEV’s much-heralded 67 with 


Love Song of Barney Kempinsh 
Arkin could revel in: that of a har 
desperately to get to his own wedd 
chase through the streets of M 
established success, is impatiently m 
gins to | 
tion picture n 


kind of 
ed schlep ат 
gh-camp 
Now Arkin, 
rking time till he be 
ive the prized role of Yosarian in the 
lering of Catch22. A “nobody, 


what 


SEX IN CINEMA continue pom page 160) 


ibat he was going to win his various cen- 
sorship battles over The Outlaw. During 
the War. she manied the proto 
player Bob Waterfield, and w 

мар quarterback of (he Los 
Rams was inducted into the Army, she 
followed him to Fort Benning, Georgia. 
To while away the time, she worked in a 
beauty parlor im nearby Columbus, us- 
ing her married name, and helped in the 


warbond drives. Perhaps more 
ale and the War effort, 
however. were her popular and omni- 


present pinups Her lush figure and sen 
sual face, with the lustrous dark h: 
aging heavily to one side, a 
luselages of literally hundreds of be 
ing planes, Men seemed ло respond 
spontancously to the challenge in her 
К eyes and pouting lips. About her 
predominant expression, Jane was later 
10 explain (ó an interviewed 
d and I got that 
w it sounds 


glamorous. 

With the War over and The Outlaw 
in gene the Russell career be- 
an largely because wher- 
ever onc looked, Hughes had her pictur 
plastered on the billboards of the nation 
a advertisir wmprecedent 


What Are 

Russell's 

iy poster 

and the picture that accompa: 


nied 
gue 


it left little room for a second 
Once more the film ran afoul of 
the censors, this time specifically because 
of the boldness of the ads; but Hughes, 
undaunted, rented theaters on his own 
to bring his picture 10 a panting popu- 
Jace and used every resource at his com- 
mand ro keep it running. The omorial 
hue and ay undoubtedly helped. When 
a Balimore judge, upholding a local 
ban on the film, opined that "Jane Rus 
sells breasts hung over the picture like a 
thunderstorm spread over a landscape, 
he was hardly discouraging potential pa- 
trons, As one Los Angeles newspaper rc- 
ported about the lines formi the 
box office, "What packed them in was an 
opportunity for anatomical research. 
Their anatomical researches were fur- 
thered when Hughes lent her out for an. 
inconsequential quickie called The 
Young Widow, m which she was re- 
quired to do litle more than lounge 
about in various black negligees. She 
fared better as a comedic Calamity Jane 
opposite Bob Hopc in The Paleface, she 
seemed to enjoy spoofing her own im 
age, meanwhile filling her frontier. cos- 
to abundant advantage. Е 
she joined another rising sex 
queen, Marilyn Monroe, in a musical 
version of Gentlemen Prefer Blondes— 
and spoofed another image when, to- 
ward the end of the she prollered a 


164 hilarious parody of Marilyn's walk and 


speech patieris. Then, once more under 
the aegis. of the rambunaious Mr. 
Hughes, she provoked the Legion of De- 
cency all over again with her costumes 
and dancing in The French Line. The 


Legion was particularly unhappy over 


» ab sed blacksatin omit. that 
had three large holes in the midrilf sec 
tion, and even more so because she pro- 
ceeded (o perform а bumpand-grind 
routine that included. both side bumps 
and a frou bump. The Production Code 
Administration alo took offense; its 
rather finicky regulations permitted side 
bumps or front bumps, but not the two 
together. When the film was refused. а 
use of this, Miss Russell sided 
with the official viewpoint, allowing that 
the scene was, indeed, in poor taste. She 

sied, also, that she had toned down 
her performance in the offending m 
ber, and that it had come out as it did 
only because the low camera angle 
placed undue emphasis on the pelvic re- 


"v 


gion and its movements. Thus in the 
twilight of her film career, Miss Russell 
suddenly found, ironically. support- 

g the censors. 
Or perhaps it was not so ironic. Ac 
tually. despite her onscreen impersona- 


tions, Jane Russell was and is deeply 

s aud contributed handsomely 10 
the construction of “The Ch: 
Valley in Loc Angeles, (Th 
living doll.” 
tively promoted such сам 


she once averred.) She has 
s the 
Fund. 
1 adopted 
An avid Bible 
reader, she is an equally avid. peruser of 
comic books, and on occasion betrays this 
proclivity. Once when a Senator asked 
for her autograph, she agreed, then 
looked up, knitting her brow, to ask, 
Say, tell me how to spell Senator.” But 
none of these are the endowments for 
which she will be remembered. At the 
t of her career, Russell Birdwell had 
she was voted the out- 
standing sweater girl of 1941. By the 
e she was named Miss Torpedo of 
1949, it was an accolade that she had 
won compleicly on her own. 


beter known 
three children 


Whit Birdwell did for Russell was a 
proximated by other, more anonymous 
publicity people for girls like Ann Sheri- 


dan, Carole Landis and Maric McDon- 
ald, all of whom shared Jane's attributes, 


if not her popularity. Appellations like 
"Oomph Girl” "Ping Girl 

Body" did not spring spor 

Irom their audiences’ subconscious: they 
were assiduously fed and fostered by 


reams of copy and sticks of stills em 
ing from their studios publicity ойне. 
ft just so happened that all al 
sessed what great sections of the populace 
especially these in wnifonn—wanted 
at the moment; and their like 


i 


te pos 


adorned innumerable GI barracks dur. 
ing the War years. B was Walter Win- 
chell who inadvertently provided Miss 
Sheridan with her great boost to glory 


when, toward the end of 1939, he wrote 
in his syndicated column. that she had 
“umph.” An alert press agent at 


Warners, the studio that had her under 
contract, changed the spelling of that 
somewhat ungraceful term to “oomph.” 
More than that, he claimed that the 
actress had been elected by national ac 
claim “The Oomph Girl” of the movies. 
Wire services took widespread note. 
Bom Clara Low Sheridan im 1915 
Ann was a likable Texas girl who hi 
come to Hollywood in 1933 as the wi 
ner of a "Scarch for Beauty” contes 
held by Pa ad for several years 
movies mainly as 
tive part of the background. 
She had ed t0 supporting roles by 
the time Winchell noticed her; only 
then, with the studio plugging hard, did 
the demand for her stills begin to grow 
These tended. to focus on her head of 
rich red hair, either piled up high or 
spilling down over her shoulders, bui 
iably combined with a sexy, sl 
s expression in her large, heavy 
ded eyes. Her parts grew larger, but not 
large enough to Mis Sherida 
“The publicity they were giving me.” 
she stated many years later, “all that 
Oomph Girl buildup. got to be a 
dreadful bore. I resented it because they 
never backed n up with any roles. One 
day Paul Muni overheard all my beef 
ing. Dont be silly; be said. "Use it 10 
fight for die parts you want.” So Û started 
awing with the 
front office to give me an A picture.” 
Warners cipitukued by giving her a 
lead role in King’s Row—the Peyton 
Place of its day—and a salary of $2000 a 
week. Ann won plaudits as the poor 
available girl from the wrong side of the 
tracks who is thrown over by the town 
rake afer thei айай. Her scene at the 
young man's bedside alter he has under- 
gone а leg invariably wrung 
s from the audience. King’s Row also 
ı invaluable boost 10 the carcer of 
Re playing a айн mans 
whose s indulgence encour 
the local heart 
nerally 


d 


facic 


son 
aged him 10 become 
breake 
ther 
cut roles; and his original leltw 
1 leanings shifwa, 


seen 


rd pol 


з 1066 he became à rightwing Re 
a candidate for governor of Cali 
As for Miss Sheridan, during ihe 
Forties she g ly al ied lier car 
Jier image of “everybody's разн 
wisecracks and. insulis with the likes of 
Jimny € Humphrey Bogar 
Pat O'Brien—for emotional aud 
dramatic roles. Nowadays, her long list 
of pre 1018. pictures turns up with im 
pressive regularity on late-night. televi 
sion, while Ann. heiself is the star ol a 


ча nde 


gney aud 


more 


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popular daytime TV soapopera series. 
Sic transit gloria mundi 


The precise origins of Carole Landis 
g” appellation are less well docu- 


‚ 100, p. 
recesses of some press agents 
mind, (It has been suggested that 
îs the sound a button would make as it 
popped off one of Miss Landis well- 
filled blouses or sweaters) Like Jane 
Russell, she was always more popu 
sg the War years as a pinup tha 
though, to be sure, she worked 
good deal more than Miss Russell. 
Born Frances Ridste in 1919 in the small 
Wisconsin town of Fairchild, the mov 
struck girl arrived in Hollywood in 
1937. Blonde, beautiful and bountifulle 
formed, she moved quickly from cx 
bits to small paris, including a stint in a 
Republic serial. Stardom came in 1940, 
when she played the pelted mate to cave 
man Victor Mature in Hal Roach’s One 
Million D.C. She was kept busily em- 
ployed after that, in such secondary Hol- 


lywood efforts as Tinnabout, Dance 
Hall, Cadet Girl and Orchestra. Wives. 
She duly recorded her tour of Service- 
m lations in North Africi dur 
the War for posterity, both as а book 
and as a film, in Fom fills in a Jeep. 
But somehow, for all her loyal fans, Car- 
ole was never able to break though to 
the top echelons of her profession. De. 
spite the dozens of movies that she 
made, not could be considered a 
prestige production, Her career was in 
obvious decine by July 5. 1948, the date 
on which her name suddenly made the 
headlines: they stated that she had died 
from an overdose of sleeping pills. 
Almost as hectic as her screen career 
was her marital record—five manages 
four divorces and one separation (the 
Jast from the 1 prodi ccr AV. Horace 
Schmidlapp). Ou the above-mentioned 
filth of July, Rex Harrison—olten r 
ferred to, even then, as "Sexy Rexy"—di 
covered Carole’s body as it lay on the 
floor of the bathroom of her Pacific Pali 
sades home, her head resting against her 
jewel box, Investigation quickly revealed 


vs ir 


ouc 


bromm 


"Here comes the beach crowd!” 


that the two had dined together at her 
home the night before, and that after he 
left. Carole had. consumed large quanti- 
tics of Seconal pills What added to the 
mystery was the maid's statement that 
he had telephoned ihe next morning and 
suggested to her that she not waken her 
mistress, The maid further informed ihe 
police that for the past few weeks Harri- 
son had been in the habit of lunching 
regularly with Carole. Her 
despondency, it was quickly established. 
inly due to (vo things: worry over 
her dererioi nd Harrison's 
relusal to m an understandable 
one, since he was already married. 10 the 
beautiful European film star Lilli P 
er, Miss Palmer showed herself t0 be 
made of sterling sul when she rushed 
from New York to be at her hi 
side during the resultant ugly. publicity 
to which the actor was subjected; Schmid- 
lapp. on the other hand. expressed shoc 
over the death of his estranged wife but 
refused to make the trip from New York 
10 Los Angeles. Harrison left Hollywood 
shortly hereafter, nor to return for sev 
eral years. 

M the inspiration for € 
"Ping" was obscure, there was no doubt 
whasoever about Marie McDonald's 
"Body." A Powers model before she be- 


gan her screen. carcer in 1941. her lush 
curves and photogenic features made her 
an immediate pinup favo 


well proportioned 
that she never deig 
Like many of the wartime pinups, how- 
ever. her career was over almost belore it 
began. Born Marie Frye in Kentucky in 
1024, the daughter of a former Ziegfeld 
girl. she had hawked cigarettes in a New 
York night club, did some modeling. ap- 
peared on Broadway in George White's 
Scandals and sang with Tommy Dorscy's 
band belore being noticed by а Holly- 
wood talent scout and signed for pic 
tures. From then on, her career seemed 
dominated more by sordid scandal than 
by cinematic achievement. Married for a 
time to Vic Orsatti, a promine 
agent, she won а few good roles, the best 
when she played opposite Gene Kelly in 
Living in a Big Way (1947), But its title 
held the key to her problems. After di- 
vorcing Orsatti, she married. millionaire 
shoe manu Hary Kal (who 
later graduated to Debbie Reynolds); and 
from then on, her name was intermit- 
tently in the news as the victim, so she 
daimed—seldom with substantive proof 
—ol assorted assaults and rapes. In Octo- 
ber 1965, a haggard shell of her former 
splendid self, she, 100, 100k the sleeping: 
pill route to oblivion. 


L actors 


turer 


а Turner, with her pert young 
ative body, was aho a 
pinup. But shc 
she was a star, a love 


^g qu 


popu 
something more 
goddess, a reign 


was 


and she did 


nothing, on screen or off, that did not 
further that reputation. Lana's story- 
book discovery at a Hollywood soda 
fountain’ has already been remarked 
upon, and her emergence as the nation's 
mumberone “sweater girl” as well In 
February 1940, she reached her 19th 
birthday and, while not yet an impor 
tant маг, was nevertheless being fre- 
quently mentioned in gosip columns as 
“the queen of the Hollywood 
clubs." During her sorties into th 
tablishmenis, she was invariabl 
panied by such newsworthy escorts as 
Tommy Dorey, Howad Hughes, Gene 
Krup Morris, Mature 
and Tur ebruary of 1940, 
she also became engaged 10 Greg Baut 
zer, a prominent Los Angeles lawyer and 


handsome bachelor around town. On 
her birthday night, however, Bautzer 
failed 10 keep a date with Lana, plead 


chache. That same even 
sorely milled, Lana accepted a first date 
with bandleader Artic Shaw, with whom 


she had recently appeared in Dancing 
Co-Ed. Shaw that evening was supposed 
to be seeing Beny Grable: instead, the 
two raced straight for Las Vegas and got 
mai Lx ly 
tuck Bautzer's engagement ring into her 
handbag during the ceremony. After- 
ward, she wired her mother: “Got mar 
ried in Las Vegas. Love. Lana." Lana’s 
mother, naturally assuming that her 
daughter had married Bautzer, put 
through a phone call to his 
informed that the d 


rs film career almost ei 
nd there. MGM, the studio that 
ici. was outraged by her 
failure to consult its publicly depart 
ment before manying, and an order 
went to that department to hold off on 
y further efforts in her behalf. The na- 
mal pres, however, was more than 
happy to fill in. Lana Turner, after all, 
was mews. Grudgingly, MGM made 
peace with her. But things were far from 
peaceful in the Shaw-Purner hilltop 
menage. In an article in Woman's Home 
Companion in 1951, Lana revealed sev 
eral details about her four months and 
cleven days as Mrs. Artie Shaw. Artie, 
she said. very quickly informed her that 
she ignorant, Lana admitted the 
charge bur complained about the rem 
edy. He gave her big, thick books to read 
when she would rather have been dane 


ing. He kept quoting Niewsche to her 
amd would make belittling remarks 
when she admitted her mystification. “J 
was rather pleased," she said smugly, "to 
discover that Herr Nicusche actually 
went crazy." Shaw was no less critical of 
her personal habi ed, 
he saw red, Lipstick and high heels were 
also forbidden by him, He regarded her 
fondness for dipping potato pancal 
applesauce as vulgar, and made по se 


. When she wore 


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187 


PLAYBOY 


168 


“I get the feeling that you're the type who 
ikes to hiss and tell.” 


Аше» 
‚ they were 
Lana 


of it. Undaunted, she 
shirts, but “when I d 
thrown back at me.” Subsequent] 
bitterly referred to the m s “my 
college education." We: xhaus- 
ion, she retired to а Santa Monica hos- 
d had, as she put it, “a whopping 
nervous. breakdown." ‘Typically enough 


fiancé, Greg Bautzer, who 
details of the ensuing divorce. 
Her rise to the top was rapid thereaft- 
er. While her role in MGM's lavish Zieg 
feld Girl (1941) was relatively brief, 
Lana's appearance drew а а hou- 
quet from The New York Times. which 
termed her “breath-taking... perilously 
lovely.” and went on to applaud h 
surprisingly solid performance as thc 
lile girl from Brooklyn.” (Throughout 
her long career, the critics have cont 
ued to rediscover from time to time the 
fact that Lama, the doll faced glamor 
queen, is an actress of considerable 
emotional depth—and cach. time they 
seem to be thrown anew by this discov- 
a fullfledged Metro 


Honky Tonk (also 1941). in 
he 


which, for the first of many times, 
was teamed with ihe vaunted Clark G 
ble. Gable played the gambling man ina 
19th Century Western town; Lana, thc 
prim little miss from Boston who even- 
tually wins him away from the saloon's 
bawdy dancing girls. To demonstrate 10 
her new husband that she is every lovely 
inch their 
down for him in black-lace underwear, 
Both Gable and the audience were all 
eyes and. 10 quote the Times again, she 
revealed that she was “not only beau 
fully but ruggedly constructed.” Not 
long after this, MGM issued a photo of 
Lana loosely robed in ostrich fcathers: if 
we can accept the studio's ligure, a mil- 
lion Servicemen wrote in for copies. 
Despite the escalation of her career, 
Lana was still lonely for love—dithicult 
is this might be to imagine. To fill the 
bill, she chose a Los Angeles business- 
man named Stephen Crane. True to the 
Turner pattern haste 
and regretted it quickly: 
Crue's divorce from a previous wife, 
they soon discovered. was not legally 
valid. The marriage 
order to avoid bigamy cl 
might have stayed that way had Lana not 
become pregnant in the meantime. 
When Crane’s divorce became official, 
ried, mainly for the sake of 
by, Cheryl. Cheryl herself was to 
achieve а certain notoriety in subsequent 
years, but that story belongs later in this 
history. Lana won her divorce from 
nc in 1944, when she was but 23 
ars old. An account of the proceedings 
the notalways-reliable Confidential 
magazine, which plagued a host of film 
stars during the Filties, claimed that, 
in fact. € тей ro bring divorce 
but was talked out. 


ges and it 


of it by MGM. According to Conf- 
dential, Crane was irked by his wife's 
tendance at an interracial party and 
ns to Negro singer Billy 
у саке, after the divorce, 
was rumored to be altarbound. 
with Tyrone Power, then with 
Fernando Lamas; but she actually tied 
the knot with millionaire sportsman Bob 
Topping. “This is f she stage- 
whispered for all to hear on the day of 
her wedding. Forever turned out to be 
pproximately four and а half years. 

Lani changed her hair coloring al- 
most as often as she changed her men, 
going from brown (her na color) to 
Blonde, to brown to red and, in 
The Postman Always Rings Twice, to a 
bleached nearwhite, the shade she has 
since preferred. In that film, she once 
again impressed the critics with her act- 
ing, particularly in her passionate. love 
scenes with Jol field, the ill-fated 
young man she seduces into murdering 
her morose and aging husband. In Post- 
man, as in many of her films that w 
to follow, Lana was the quintessential 
sex object, the woman who was to be 
had at any cost. Not infrequently, the 
hot flames of desire singed both parties. 
the man and the woman. In this the 
Turner films frequently paralleled her 
own life story, for all too often what be- 
gan as an impulsive romance ended in 
sordid recriminations or even tragedy. 
The pattern was to be repeated in the 
Fiftics. for awaiting her were more fame 
and riches, more husbands and more lov- 
cis—among them, Johnny Stompanato, 
who ended his career as the recipient of 


fist 


a knife wielded by Lana’s by-then-teen- 
aged daughter, Cheryl. 
Another fugitive from Artie Shaw's 


school for young brides was Ava Gard. 
ner, who came to Hollywood in 1940 u 
der circumstances less than 
Born Ava Lavinia G 
Carolina farm on CI 


she was the filth— 


1922, 
d of 


helped her moth- 
a inghouse and studied 
d and typing in high school. 
But her ther-brother-in-law, Larry Ta 
noticing the lledgling beauty of his clef 


chinned young relative, prevailed upon 
her (o go to New York, where he 
promised to get her work as а mode 


Farr took hundreds of pictures of Ava 
and, unable to place them with the 
agencies, displayed them prominently in 
the windows of five New York photogra 
phy shops owned by his father. A legal 
clerk in MGM's New York office siw 
some of them and was so captivated t| 
he distributed capies in his firm's 
department, Discouraged by her fail 
to find work, Ava had already entrained 
for North Carolina, but she was home 
only a few days when The Call came 
from an MGM talent scout who wanted 


ent 
€ 


to make a sereen test of her. Her Tar 
heel accent proved so thick, however, 
that he deemed it wiser to test her silent 
ly, and while the test was being shipped 
10 the West Coast, Ava was set to study- 
ing diction. When approval came fro 
Culver City, MGM's studio lo she 
headed west with a $50-a-week contract 
tucked away in her luggage. 

Her first four years at MGM were not 
propitious. The studio liked her look 
but was of the opinion that she couldn't 
h school 


act her way through a hi 
Christmas pageant. And th sill 
that accent. She was given several small 


roles, but thee were mainly due 
the influence of Mickey Rooney, then 
MGM's biggest juvenile draw, who liked 


Avas looks enough to marry her in 
January 1942. “We were children,” 
Ava rd commented about thi 


marriage, which lasted all of 18 months. 
Howard Hughes next reportedly took an 
interest in the green-eyed beauty, but 
the relationship foundered when she 
refused to confine herself to him alonc— 
or so the gossips said. Gossip of the time 
also had it that Ava had managed to 
read only one book from cover 10 cover 
until her meeting with the erudite Artie 
Shaw, that book being Gone with the 
Wind. After marrying her in 1945, Artie 
felt that her lack of broad cultural hori 
zons must be immediately corrected, 
The subsequent story is not unlamili 
According to reputable authority, Ava 
was fed massive doses of Proust, Thomas 
Wolfe, Thomas Mann and, for a well 
ned dessert, Karl Mars’ Das Kapital. 
(I's said that she spelled "capital" with 
a K for many months thereafter.) To 
augment this regimen, Shaw sent her to 
UCLA for courses in psychology and 
English literature—upon which A 
a to display nervous symptoms 
was sent to a. psychiatrist. 

When Shaw discovered—once again— 
that beauty was not necessarily accom 
panied by brains, be took the legal way 
out. Although his marriage to Ava lasted 
little more than а year, its tenure was to 
have at least one fasting effect оп Ava's 
later habits of life and love. Among the 
tomes given to her by Shaw was Heming- 
ways Death in the Afternoon: trom 
it flowered her preoccupation, not to 
say obsession, with bullfighting and 
bullfighters. 

Bur that was in the Fifties, the decade 
in which Ava became, according to a 
conclave of Hollywood sculptors and art 
is, “the most perfect modern Venus in 
America.” By that time, she also symbol- 
ized the restless, disenchanted star who 
had tired of constantly, as she put it, 
"exhibiting your façades until you begin 
to wonder if anyone will ever be inter 
ested in what's behind your looks." Cer 
tainly, during the Forties, it was mainly 
her “facades” that enraptured the movie 
goers. Writing of Whistle Stop (1916), in 

(continued on page 172 


169 


WHO'S AFRAID OF TEEVEE JEEBIES? 


“Yes, I know youre on your "Im Bob Johnson of the Peace Corps—don't let on 
lunch hour, Doctor, but...” you know me and ГИ get you out of this somehow... !" 


“Tm sorry, Perkins. but someone has simply “And here we have à member UN the group 
got to tell you about your breath . . that didn't use Crest . 


“I always thought psychoanalysts worked in regular "OR, gimme the funny balloon you took 
170 offices or hospitals or something like that . out of Mommy's dresser.” 


new tongue-in-cheek dialog to enliven television’s late-night movies 


"That's him, boys! That's the guy 
who sold me this coat!” 


“And if 1 find you've been fooling around again when “Just one more minute and ГЇЇ 
1 get back in port, ГИ break your other leg!" take out the thermometer.” 


"I've got to hand it to you, Sam— “OK, Blondie—watch your hand!” 
you sure know how to break in а wife . . . 2” 


171 


PLAYBOY 


SEX IN CINEMA continued тот page 169) 


which she played her first major part, a 
critic said that "Ava Gardner brings 
nothing but appearance to the role.” A 
few months later, she was seen to better 
effect in The Killers, an amplification of 
the Hemingway short story. There was 
no question alter this film—so full of 
approving whistles was the audiences 
response to her—that she w 
for the full star treatment; yet, 
during the remainder of the Forties, 
her vehicles were such that her career 
and image were only moderately ad- 
vanced. She won nods of approval from 
the critics as the torch singer who was 
able's girlfriend in The Hucksters 
(1947), but she was a decidedly lackluster 
love goddess in the 1948 film version of 
One Touch of Venus. In the decade that 
followed, however, she not only became 
the headline-haunted wife of Frank Si- 
natra but flowered into one of the na- 
tion's prime sex symbols in her own 
right—all of which will be chronicled in 
a later installment. 

As with every decade, the films of the 
Forties had their share of exotics— 
foreign-born (or forcign-sceming) crea- 
tures who exuded а come-hither type of 
sexual allure most often described by 
press agents as “smoldering.” Lupe Velez, 
the Mexican spitfire of the Thirties, took 
her own life in 1944; but Dorothy 


Lamour remained on hand for vampish 
parodies, often appearing with Bob 
Hope and Bing Crosby in their popular 
Road series. Early in the Forties, however, 
her eminence in this field was seri- 
ously challenged by a dark-haired, olive- 
skinned beauty named Maria Montez. In 
tune with the times, Universal's publici- 
ty department promptly dubbed her the 
“Splendang Girl"—splendang being the 
type of sarong the shapely señorita 
sported in her first starring role, in 
South of Tahiti (1911). So skimpy were 
the harem and jungle costumes provided 
for her by the studio that once she an- 
nounced to the press, with a straight 
face, that someday she would like to 
do a movie in which she wore clothes. 

My — peecture gening nakeder 


апі nakeder ined. Maria's 


are 
she compl 
Hollywood career came to an end with 


Siren of Atlantis (1949), after which she 
went to Europe with her husband, 
French film star Jean Pierre Aumont. 
“There she died in 1951, drowned in her 
own bathtub: reportedly the victim of a 
ck, she was found by her sister 
a and her heartbroken husband. 
riously, however, she lives on today 
in a kind of demilife, a heroine of New 
York's "underground" film cultists. Nor 


only have several written about her but 


one has even gone so far as to dedicate 
a movie of his to the departed sex queen, 
Brooklyn-born Gene Tierney also rates 
‚ thanks to her 
bones and her narrow. piercing, greenish- 
bluc eyes. One of her earlier roles, for 
example, cast her as "Mother" Gin 
Sling's Eurasian daughter, Poppy, in Jo- 
sef von Sternberg's remake of the vener- 
able Shanghai Gesture. At other times 
she was Indian, Polynesian, Egypt 
Rusian, Chinese, Italian and Span 
her ow а 
mixture of Swedish, 
Spanish. Her father, a wealthy New 
York. broker, saw to it that she received 
education suitable to а budding so- 
cialite: exclusive private schools in the 
East and a fashionable finishing school 
in Lausanne, Switzerland. Her first 
screen offer came by chance when, on a 
vacation in Cali . she happened to 
a movie set, was noticed by a direc- 
diately given a tes. Her 
ily, however, insisted that she return 
to Connecticut and continue her school- 
ing. Soon after, in the course of a social 
visit with George Abbott, the distin- 
guished Broadway director was so im- 
pressed with her fresh 18-year-old beauty 
that he offered her a role in his pro- 
duction of The Male Animal. This time 
the parents consented; and during the 
run of the play, she was spotted by a Fox 
talent scout, given another screen test 
and returned 10 Hollywood as a prime 
prospect for stardom. Although her first 
screen appearance, in The Return of 
Frank James (1940), elicited Irom the ed: 
itors of The Harvard Lampoon a special 
award as “The Worst Discovery of 
1940," the youthful Miss Tierney soon 
proved them myopic when it came to аз 
sessing star potential. At first exploited 
in roles that required little more than 
good looks and an occasional seductive 
glance, she gradually progressed to dra- 
matic parts, giving good account of her 


self in such films as Laura, Dragonwyck 
Her 


and Leave to Heaven 

Ir 1 20, Gene became a 
count ying dress designer (and 
count) Oleg Cassini. Their first child was 
born mentally defective, a circumstance 
that has forever weighed heavily upon 
the actress, and the marriage itself ended 
in divorce a few years later. According to 
director Ouo Preminger, the young John 
F. Kennedy paid several visits to the set 
of Laura while its filming was in prog- 
ress—and not to learn about moviemak. 
a time, her name was al 
h Aly Khan, after his divorce 
Hayworth. (In those days, it 
was always either Aly Khan or Artie 
Shaw who got the beautiful girls) The 
nance fizzled out, however, and with 
it, at least temporarily, Gene's career; 
she retired to a rest home, the victim of 
nervous exhaustion. Now married again, 
and beautiful as ever, she makes an 


occasional visit to Hollywood for "cam- 
appearances in films such as Advise 
and Consent ov Toys in the Attic. The 
roles she plays today, however, are chic 
and well groomed, a trifle matronly and 
a far cry [rom the Eurasian temptresses 
id Polynesian princesses of yesteryear. 
Alas no such happy ending awaited 
inutive Veronica Lake, whose fa- 
“peekaboo” hairdo was every bit as 
r during the War years as Jane 
bosom or Betty Grable's legs. 
1 appeal during that period 
was once fervently summed up by John 
Russell Taylor, of the esteemed British 
film journal Sight and Sound: "Ah." he 
tensions that would build up 
c waited for the invitation 
in the strangely husky voice, in the pro- 
ive swing of the ed box 
, to reach mation at a 
moment of climactic abandon when the 
face-obscuring m | blonde hair 
would be swept aside in an embrace and 
reveal the full glory of the large, lus- 
trous eyes, the slightly sunken cheeks 
and thin, heavily made-up lips which 
marked the apogee of Forties glamor.” 
With all that, one scarcely had to act. 
The story has it that when she cared 
оп a set for the first time 
aied ош. “My God, that hair of yours 
hides one eye completely." Veronica 
obligingly put it up in сш nd wound 
up, cinematically speaking, on the cut- 
ting-room floor. Three films later, alter 
little or no success, she w: 
ted to wear her hair her own way. 
Cast as a sultry and obliging nighi-club 
in I Wanted Wings (1941). Veron- 
overnight. sen 
in the Paramount cut- 
ting rooms who first recognized her star 
quality. "А half pint Harlow," was their 
perceptive estimate, а number of 
the reviews of the completed picture 
echoed this opinion. The New York 
World Telegram took noie of her rev 
She sports a décollctage." 
remarked, “that goes farther 
annah.” The Legion 
areness of the 
its own way: It 


tion. 


ing costumes: 
Hs critic 


newcomer's charms in 
placed 1 Wanted Wings on its "Con- 
demi тї” list, citing as cause the 
film's “suggestive costuming.” 

In such films as Sullivan's Trave 
This Gun for Hire, The Glass Key and I 
Married a Witch, the fetishistic appeal 
of the long blonde hair and the ob- 
scored. сус was systematically explored, 
and Veronicas personal style turned 
into a national fad—until the Govern- 
ment stepped in. There was a war on, 
ond women in great numbers had gone 
to work in shops and factories. Put sim- 
ply, the new hairdos were snagging in 
the wheels of thi achine. Veronica 
vas not only prevailed upon to adopt a 
lessabandoned hair style but she also 
aveled ceaselessly about the country, 


selling war bonds and cxpariating on 
the theme that short hair could win the 
War. This may have been one reason for 
the precipitous decline of her film ca- 
reer. With both eyes showing, some of 
her mystery was gone. By the time hostil- 
ties had ended and she could resume 
the style, it was almost 100 
few more pictures, cach of them 
mpressive than the one before, and 
through. Her name still crops up 
occasionally in the newspapers. however 
ently when, as а cocktail wai 
ess in New York, she was arrested on 
drunk and disorderly" charge. 
There were, of course 
other sexpots during the Forties, shapely 
and comely girly such as Linda Darnell, 
Virginia Mayo, Cyd Charisse, Yvonne 
de Carlo and M Maxwell, bur all 
of these—and more seemed. somewhat 
second-wring, cuties who got the nod 
whenever the first team was out playing 
somewhere else. Others, such ж Esther 
Williams, Eleanor Parker and red-haired 
Susan Hayward, were established during 
the Forties but found their greatest 
successes the subsequent decade. 
And there were also the durable few 
Jo awlord, Bette Davis, Katharine 


innumerable 


Hepburn. Ginger Rogers, Rosalind Rus 
sell. Barbara 
bridge the decade 
their 
ions e appeal and 
These were not merely personalities. el 
vated to stardom by a trick with the hair 
or an inspired adjective from the publi 


anwyck—who seemed to 
ahering 
ing fash- 


eflortlessh 


department. These were actresse; 
md th ader ranks were joined 
during the Forties by Sweden's Ingrid 


Bergman and Ireland's Greer Garson. 
Coincidentally, Miss Bergman and Miss 
rson were also Hollywood's two most 
authentic beauties of the period. 

Born in Stockholm in 1917 of a Swed- 
ish father and a German mother, Ingrid 
Bergman studied in Sweden's 
prestigious Royal ic Theatre 
School, then went quickly into Swedish 
films. David O. Selznick saw опе of 
these, Intermezzo, in which she played 
young music student who has an affair 
With a distinguished concert violinist. 
Selznick was so impressed that he not 
only bought the film, which he later 
(1939) reshot in Hollywood with Leslie 
Howard as the musician, but he brought 
Bergman along to costar opposite him. 
Soon after, she was on Broadway sta 
ring in Liliom with Burgess Meredith 


173 


PLAYBOY 


174 


and Elia Kazan. By this time, she had 
ndstrom, а Stockholm 
dentist rned surgeon), and had 
given birth to a daughter, Pia. АП very 
respectable—but wait 

Ingrid Hollywood career burgeoned. 
iccession, she appeared oppo- 
suc Warner Baxter in Adam Had Four 
Sons, with Robert Montgomery in Rage 
im Heaven amd as à loose cockney Dar- 
maid in the 1941 version of Dr. Jekyll 
and Mr, Hyde, with Spencer Tracy. In 
one scene from that film, she participated 
in а hallucination of the good docto 
who visualizes her on a bed of roses, her 


shoulders bare and her long hair loose; 
the hallucination progresses, however, 
the flowers mrn to vious, slimy 


nud through which the lovely but slut- 
sh barmaid is dragged and horribly 
smeared. Her reward was the first of her 
Academy Award nominations, 
Casablanca, in which she costarred with 
Humphrey Bogart, captured so well the 
bittersweet romantic mood of the period 
that it immediately became a box-office 
smash. Although by 1942 Ingrid was 
being offered her pick of roles, the one 
she most coveted was that of Maria, the 
warravaged heroine of Hemingway's 
For Whom the Bell Tolls; Hemingway 
himself had. put in a word for her. Para- 
mount, however. ded her still 
apparent Swedish accent as 100 much of 
а handicap and. сам dancer. Vera Zorina 


for the role instead. 
filming began, the company realized its 
mistake and hastily summoned Ingrid to 
share Gary Cooper's sleeping bag and 
help him make “the earth move.” Cen- 
sorship managed to make their two-in- 
опе sleeping-bag arrangement seem as 
cory and socially acceptable as bundling, 
but Ingrid won another Academy nomi- 
nation anyway. The follo 
won the Oscar for her ре 
Gaslight, the tale of a wife being d 
mad by her scheming husband, Charles 
Boyer. 

By the time 1945 rolled around, she so 
dominated the screen that it was consid. 
ered smart to crack, t 
without Ingrid Bergm: 
one year, she played а nu 
of M. Mary's, а psychiatr 
cock's Spellbound and a French adven- 
turess in Saratoga Trunk, her blonde 
tresses concealed by a sleek dark wig. 
The following year, in Notorious, Hitch- 
cock employed her 
somewhat-besmirched | spy 
cary Grant track down a N: 
ring in South Ame 
haps best remembered for its dircctor’s 
inventive ng of a nonstop kissing 
duel between the two leads—a kiss that 
begins on а balcony, is vaguely disturbed 
by the persistent ringing of a telephone 
inside, and continues during a long trek 
across the room to the offending phone, 


iven 


T saw a picui 
in 


“In that 
in The Bells 
t in Hitch- 


nium 
1. The film is per- 


where Ingrid continues to nuzzle while 
Cary talks to his secretservice boss. The 
udience was left to asume—and Ingrid's 
attentive behavior virtually confirmed — 
that it would take an earthquake (o 
interrupt their Iove play after that, 
Meanwhile, as it happened. there was 
an earthquake in thc making. In Italy, 
the passionate and gifted director Robe 
to Rossel ad singlehandedly given 
rise to the neorealist movement with his 
wo pictures Open City and Paban. 
Widely hailed, they had caught the in- 
terest of Hollywood—and of Ingrid Berg- 
She so admired his genius after 
seeing Paisan that she wrote to him: 


Rossellini: | saw your 
and enjoyed them very 
much. If you need a Swedish actress 
who speaks English very well, who 
has not forgoiten her German, who 
is not very u lable in 
French, and who i ın knows 
only "li amo,” I am ready to come 
and make a film with you 


mui 


Dear Mr. 
films . 


Although Rossellini was still married, 
and also involved with his Italian lead 
ng lady, Anna Magnani, he wasted no 


time in answering. He cabled her, in 
part 
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While Ingrid was in London, making 
Under Capricorn for Hitchcock, she flew 
to Paris for her first meeting with Ros- 
sellini. Tt was agreed between them that 
they would do a film together. Shortly 
thereafter, Rossellini Hew to New York 
to accept a criti d for Paisan, 
then went on to California for another 
meeting with Ingrid, her husband (who 
was her manager as well as a 
and some movie moguls. Omar € 
a reporter for the Los Angeles Evening 
Mirror was meanwhile printing some 
cocky quotes. According to Garrison, 
Rossellini had told him, "Swedish women 
are the casest in the word to im- 
press, because they have such cold hus- 
bands" And before flying to America, 
“the Ace of Hearts,” as Garrison dubbed 
him, had reputedly boasted, "Tm going 
to put the horns оп Mr. Bergr If 
that was what Rossellini actually said, he 
was as good as his word. Ingrid joined 
him on the barren, volcanic island of 
Suomboli to make the picrure. of that 
name, and rumor soon had it that. the 
director and his lovely star were shai 
common quarters—as indeed they were. 
Their idyl of creative togetherness pro- 
vided the columnists with so many juicy 
tidbits that the resulting scandal rocked 
the nation like nothing since the Teapot 
Dome revelations of the Twenties. Boy- 


cous of Ingrid's films were threatened: 
ıs denounced on the floor of the 
Hollywood's apostle of 


she w 
U. S. Senate 
degradation.” As a fitting climax to In- 
grid’s shattering of convention. it was 


revealed that she was pregnant Ву 
Rossellini. 
A frenzied Mexican proxy divorce for 


vid ond an Austrian annulment of 
Rossellini's marriage made it possible 
for the two to arrange a proxy marriage 
in Mexico, but not before little Rober- 
tino was born in Rome. It was another 
two years before Lindstrom would con- 
sent to a California decree, by which 
time the Bergman-Rossellini ménage 
had been augmented by a pair of twins. 
Although she continued to make films 
abroad with her husband, none of them 
either particularly noteworthy or suc 
cessful, her carcer in the United States 
not only had come to a dead halt but 
appeared to be wrecked [or good. She had 
done the unforgivable: She had broken 
the image. 

As permissive as the American public 
sometimes is about the peccadillocs of 
screen stars—the sensational sex life of 


Mary Astor in an earlier decade, for ex- 
ample, and in kuer yeas when the 
Elizabeth Taylor-Richard Burton affair 


flowered into sensational headlines—thi: 


was not so in Ingrid Bergr 
Even though in the earlier pori т 
career she had played а trollop in Dr. 
Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, she was by now 
associated in the public mind with such 


roles as the good nun of The Bells of 
‚ the innocent wife terrorized 
med Joan of Arc. 
"re- 


St. Mary's 
in Gaslight and the 
When she flew in the face of these 
spectable” portrayals with her 
nonconformity—by abandoning her r 
of wife and mother to cohabit with an 
lalian film director of hardly the most 
ory moral reputation and to bear that 
same director's child out of wedlock 
this was simply too much for the public 
to countenance. She had flagrantly. vio- 
lated its naive conception of her, and for 
this she was made to suffer harshly. By 
the mid-Fiftics, the romance was at an 
end: Rossellini, off in India, had pre- 
cipitated another scandal by embarking 
on an affair with Sonali Das Gupta. the 
screenwriter wife of an Indian film dive 
tor. But apparently the American public 
A now been sufficiently 
discretions. When 
she returned in 1956 for Anastasia, she 
won not only wide box-office acceptance 
but an Academy Award as well. It was 
as if, by honoring her for her public per- 
formance, the industry was showing 


case, one had to admit that she had dem- 
onstrated style and fortitude through it 
all. 


reer Garson was something else 
again. The hot breath of scandal never 


singed her red gold locks or brought the 
slightest flush to her cie; 
Throughout the entire de 
resented everything 
cheerful and wholesome in the movie 
and not once did she let her vast au- 
dience down on screen or oll. She could 
sufler nobly and beautifully (chin up, 
moist сусу looking off to the horizon or 
up at the stars), and. thus she offered a 


¢ rep- 


she was Louis B. Mayer's lavoriu 
he discovered her, in 1938, she 
ady an important and well-established 
маг of London's fashionable West End 
theaters. When she popped from behind 
a Swiss rock to meet Robert Donat's 
startled gaze in her first film, Goodbye 
Mr. Chips, a vision of sane, bread and. 
butter loveliness, both her fame and her 
nage were established. Soon she was 
aught up in the machinery of MGM's 
star system, and kept playing much the 
same part—the charming, sens 
terly dependable “Mrs.” to Walter 
geon’s, Ronald Colman's or Gregory 
Peck's “Mr. 

Although in many ways the 
of the sex star, in at least two of her 
films, Random Harvest and Julia Misbe- 
haves, she demonstrated that, in addi- 
tion to other talents, she possessed. one 


ntithesis 


of the loveliest pairs of legs that ever 
twinkled from a screen. In Random 
Harvest, they were the highlight of her 
act when, dressed in kilt and long black 
stockings, she did a music-hall impression 
of ry Lauder. But it was for her 
portrayal of a staid, courageous wartime 
wife in Mrs. Miniver that she was best 
remembered; and when, after the War, 
Metro attempted to change her image by 
co-starring her with Clark Gable in Ad 
venture—"Gable’s Back and Garson’s 
Got Him"—nothing happened. Through 
the early Forties, however, she remained 
one of that star-spangled studio's biggest 
money-makers and its reigning que 
She maintained a sense of humor about 
her high position, though, once re- 
marking that MGM's initials really 


stood for her: Metro's Golden Mare. 


Although American films of the For- 
ies were kept under censorial wraps, not 
even the censors could prevent the em 


gence of an authentic, provocative and 
delightfully disturbing new sex queen, a 
girl whose franknes about what she 


wanted and how she proposed to get it 
projected into another era. When James 
Agee of Time saw her first picture, To 
Have and Have Not (1944), he rhapso- 
dized: "Twentyscarold Lauren Bacall 
has a javelinlike vitality, a born dancer's 
eloquence in movement, a fierce female 
shrewdness and a special sweetsourness. 
With these faculties, plus a stone-crush- 
ing self-confidence and a trombone 
voice, she manages to get across the 
toughest girl a piously regenerate Holly- 
wood has dreamed of in a long, lon 
while. Sure to bring down any decent 
vulgar house is her comment on Bogart’s 
second, emboldened kiss: ‘It’s even bet 


ter when you help. She does a wickedly 
коой job of sizing up male prospects i 
^ low bar, and growls a louche song 


more suggestively than anyone in cinema 
has dared since Mae West.” Certainly 
not since Mae West had any new female 

licnces. They 
looks, her manner and her 
nes. In. To Have and Have Not, with 
sort of low growl, she educates Hum: 
phrey Bogart in the proper—or im 
proper—approach toward a girl like her 
“You don't have to say anything and you 
don’t have to do anything. Not a thing. 
Oh. maybe just—whistle. You know how 
to whistle, don't you? You just put your 


me when 
her mother and. father separated. in. 1032 
nd the mother changed her maiden 
name from Weinstein (which means 
wineglass in German) to Bacal (which 
ns (he same in Russian). Born Be 
Joan Perske in New York City, in 1924. 
Lauren attended that city's high school 
for bright girls, Julia Richmond, and 
alter graduation, modeled for a garment 
manufacturer, She disliked the work, 


175 


PLAYBOY 


176 halcyon years (halcyon, at leas 


though, and went to the American Acad 
emy of Dramatic Arts, alter which she 
became a theater usherette. Soon alter, 
she found work as a model at Harper's 
Bazaar, and her appearance on its March 
1913 cover precipitated her movie сагес 
Mrs. Howard Hawks saw it, showed it 
to her husband and, after the usual 
screen test, he signed her to a. personal 
act. Hawks coached his discovery 
ne months, and changed her name 
uren Bacall. 

mphrey Bogart, the star of To 
Have and Have Not, changed her name 
n—first to “Baby” and then, 11 days 


his divorce Пош acness Mayo 

1 (May 21, 1945). to 

Mrs. Humphrey Bogart. The Һай 
ten actor took to the r somewhat 


insolent girl at once, and aided the di- 
rector considerably im the str building 
‘Without Bogey's help," Hawks 
Imitted, "I couldn't have done 


process. 


around and wait while a gi 
ds a sce But he fell in love with 
the girl and the girl with him, and that 
le it easy." Actually, she was the per. 
fect foil for Bogar's tough way with 
women, giving the impression that the 
harder the man, the more strongly she 
could suike back or love back. Althou 
the couple made only three more films 
together—The Big Sleep, Dark Passage 
and Key Largo—these were enough. to 
establish the image that Lauren has em- 
bodied ever since, sometimes dr: icl- 
ly, more often in recent ус sercen 
Or stage comedies. Today, ied to ac 
tor Jason Robards, [r. she tends to con- 
centra her acti dway, 
where she has come to epitomize the 
slightly mannish, rapier-witted female. 
During the Forties, when the studios 
concentrated on leg art, Lauren Bacall 
was something of an i 


of sex is th mostly in the 1 
said, a to pose for 
During the Fifties, as sex in the mov 


became increasingly a bosom fixation, 
she simply took her talents elsewhere. 


“They're either too you 
wailed Beue movie 
musical, thus echoing the plaint of many 
a Forties maiden surveying the civilian 
leftovers alter Uncle Sam had taken first 
choice. It is not too surprising, with mil- 
lions of men in uniform and far from 
home, that the male sex stus of the War 
years assumed an importance in the 
dreamy constellations of the opposite 
gender (hat was unprecedented 
the days of Valentino. Whether 
the pseudosophisticated charm of Brian 
Aherne or the boy-next-doorishness of 
the befreckled Van Johnson, the bedim- 
pled Robert Walker or the be-Pepso- 
dented William Holden, the girls latched 
onto them as surrogate lovers until their 
own boys came marching home. In those 
for male 


movie actors who managed to dodge the 
dralt), it took only one good role 10 
ensure а fairly substantial future. They 
didn't have to act—they just had to look 
"Ehe best is in the Army,” Betie's 
lament continued. “What's left will never 
Sé. 
Curiously, 


the one great male star who 
shot into the movie firmament during 
the War y nd has remained. there 
ever since was neither bo 
ticated.—just indubitably 
phrey Bogart Bogart was born in 1800 
in New York City to Belmont DeForest 
Bogart, a surgeon, and Maud Hum- 
phrey. a well-known illustrator of. chil- 
dren, who used her infant son as a 
model for the famous “Maud Humphrey 
Baby." Bogart was never happy about 
first name—"I got stuck w 
liked to say—and much prefered il 
cr appellation, Bogey. Even in his youth, 
Bogey ed a cermin intractability. 
as when he was expelled from Phillips 
Academy in Andover for tossing an un- 
i lountain. At 17, 
with World War One in progress, young 
Humphrey joined the Navy; his ship was 
shelled and a wood splinter entered his 
lip, permanently damaging it and thus 
fixing his tight-lipped manner of speech 
and the slight lisp that were eventually 
to become his movie trademarks. He tried 
а few odd jobs after the War, including 
several months in a Wall Street broker- 
age, but was oriented toward an acting 
career when Willi ly. a friend 
uf his father’s, аз company 
manager for one of his plays then just 
about (o go on the road. Brady 
asked him, during the tour, to do а brief 
walk-on as a houseboy carrying a пау of 
dishes. Bogey inadvertently dropped. the 


пау and drew a huge howl from (he 
audience. 
Undaunted, however, he stayed with 


the stage and appeared frequently on 


Broadway du the “Twenties, usually 
as a romantic juvenile, He was the first 
10 utter that classic stage invitation of 
sinartset sophisticuies. “Tennis, anyone?” 
By the time he went to Hollywood for 
the first time, im 1930. he had already 
been married twice, to Helen. Menken 
and Mary. Phillips. both of them actress 
cs he had appeared with on the stage 
Two years and nine eminently forgetta- 
ble pictures later. Bogart decided that 
the movies were nor his medium and re- 
turned to the theater. But in another 
two years he was back again, after Leslie 
Howard, who had starred in The Pet- 
теа Forest on Broadway, assured War 
ner Bros. that he would not appear 
their film version unless they would also 
sign the Duke Mantee of the New York 
run, Humphrey Bogart, Warners, with 
such top cinematic gangsters as Jimmy 
Cagney and Edward G. Robinson al 
ready under contract, was understand 
ably reluctant. to add to its underworld 
but Howard was then at the very 


stable: 


peak of his popularity and adamant 
about keeping the promise he had made 


то Bogart гс working 
together. 

Suage-trained, and with a strong, force- 
ful personality. Bogart quickly com. 
manded attention upon his second 
incursion into Hollywood; but in (he 


late Thirties, male leads tended to fall ta 
such clean-cut young chaps as Robert 
Taylor, Tyrone Power or Don Ameche 
while Clark Gable and Gary Cooper 
alforded the prototypes for more rugged 
roles. Obviously, Bogart didn't fit com- 
fortably into either category; and so, in 
the next two dozen pictures he turned. 
out after The Petrified Forest (1936), 
h few exceptions, he played either 
villain or a gangster, the perfect person- 
ification of a gangland hood, an im 
placable force of evil. "The tide began to 
turn Гог him in 1941. In High Sierra, he 
was a gangster again—actually, a "mad 
dog” killer, the last of the Dillinger mob 
—but a superior script by John Huston 
plunged be the grim exterior 10 
ner core of senti 
ng. The more fan 


ment and ye 


Bogart began to emerge, hard but sym- 
pathetic. Alter having arranged an oper 


ation for a crippled girl (Joan Leslie) 
and baring his soul to an amorous taxi 
dancer (da Lupino) with whom he 
shacks up in a mountain hideout, his 
demise at the hands of the police comes 
more as pure tragedy than as a triumph 
for law and orde: 

Although Dug, 
notices for his work in High Sierra, his 
atus on the Warner lot did not 
diately improve, as witness the fact that 
he was replaced in Out of the Fog Dy 
John Garheld when Ida Lupine object- 
ed to having to live again with his salty 
pguage and not always gentlemanly 
conduct on the set. As far as the studio 
was concerned, however, he was still 
its favorite gangster. Not that Bogart 
ever objected to playing the villain. As 
he once put it, “When the heavy, full of 
crime and bitterness, grabs his wounds 
and talks about death and taxes in a 
husky voice, the audience is his and his 
alone.” But he sensibly did object to 
trite, stereotyped and shoddily written 
parts, and was not at all reticent about 
letting the 
know it. 
by casting his re 


t aceeived eun 


nt conwact play 


T in some of the shcercst drivel his stu 
turned out 


dio ever 


ise in the pub. 
1911, with High Sierra 
it was less because his roles 
because audiences had 
haps they had had the 
some profiles and vacant 
© ready now for faces that looked as 
if they had been lived in, for h 
heroes, for antiheroes. Bogey, then 43, 
amply filled the bill. He triumphed 
that same year as Sam Spade, 


3 ANION 
Best 


PLAYBOY 


178 


ттен unscrupulous private eye, in 


John Huston’s classic remake of The 
Maltese Falcon, Ihe film established on 
basic element of the Bogart раце 


Make hay with the dames, good or bad, 
but see that they get what's cor 
them. As Spade, he was quite willing to 
make love to the murderous Mary Astor, 
but had mo compunetion wha 
about delivering her into the clutches of 
the kaw after piecing together the details 
of her crimes. His rugged code of ethics 


was further exemplified in Casablanca 
when he snarled, “T'm not sticking my 
neck out for nobody "—not even, in this 


case, for Ingrid Bergman. But there was a 
softer side to him as well, onc that he took 
great pains to conceal. Ingrid's repeated 
requests to Sam. the Negro nightclub. 
nist, to play а 1s Time Goes By. 
for example. simply drove Bogart, tl 
club's proprietor, right up his own wall 


The tune reminded him of a girl he had 
loved and lost Privately, though, Bogart 
ohen referred to Miss Bergman as “the 


only 1 
which his thi 
violent. umbrage. 

Mayo was ап acues who appeared 
h Bogart in Marked Woman (19 
they were married the following ve 
was a marriage enlivened by such fre- 
quent and public brawls that columnists 
soon dubbed them “the battling Be 
garts." And when they were not fighting 
between themselves. Mayo was not above 
egging on her ewo-fisted husband 10 belt 
his frequent hecklers, many of them bar- 


dy in Hollywood” a remark 10 
rd wile, Mayo Meth 


hounds anxious to test their own tough 
nes against the world's most famous 
tough guy. “Theres madness in his 


Methot,” one wit observed after a family 
squabble at a party developed into à 
freeforall ihat almost wrecked the 
place. A certain amount of imbibing 
may have been involved, for Bogart was 
always inordinately fond of rhe sauce 
but no less was duc to а basic incompat 
bility, By the time he met Lauren. Ba- 
call. in 1044. his marriage to Mayo was 
all but over. It was Howard Hawks who 
brought the two together, preparatory to 
their filming To Have and Have Not. 
“I've seen your wst,” Bogart remarked at 
that first mecing, “It looks like weie 
gonna work together and have a lot of 
Tar." They did Lauren has always соп 
tended that her affair with Bogart was 
not the cause of his breakup with Mayo. 
He and Mayo had separated by then— 
lthough. after the film was finished, Bo. 
art briefly wejoined his wife. But the di- 


vore came through on May 10. 1945, 
ıd on Мау 21 Во d his 
Baby,” who was 25 years his junior. 


Shortly therealter, Mayo joined the ranks 
of the Hollywood suicides. Unlike the vi- 
tuperative calumny heaped upon Ingrid 
Bergman and Roberto Rossellini, Bogey 
and his "Baby" encountered not the 
slightest public resentment ol their union. 
Mier all. they had not. disturbed. thei 
worldly public images. 
Though the romance bewe 
and Ш had. received extensive: press 
their marriage came 10 the 
as something of a surprise be 


» Bogart 


public 
cause of the considerable 


e difference. 
rc surprising was the long-last- 
ing harmony that developed between 
the two. Lauren was one of Bogart's two 
reat loves, the other being his yacht, 


Even 


“Might as well try lo get some shut-eye, Ed. They 
never attack at night.” 


Santana, a 55-foot, 555,000 vessel of 
graceful proportions. Since Lauren had 
no particular allection for boating, Bo. 
gart accorded to cach a separate devo- 
Поп. The Bogaris appeared together 
in three more films, all of them 
within a society that was, as ап Eng 
writer put it, "rallish and corrupt bel 
the chromium plate of night club. cockta 
Dar, swimming pool and airconditioned 
mansion: the society of  blackmailers, 
gunmen, profesional gamblers and loose 
lovelies; of the love nest on the side 
road, and bourbon for breakfast in 
shuttered rooms where it is always 
night.” Bogart brought (o this world a 
sophistication it had never possessed. in 
the grim Thirties, lor the war-swollen 
economy had made the stakes higher 
and the surroundings plusher. But Bo- 


set 


garı was never taken in by these mate 
rial wappings: his hard-boiled cynicism 
remained, whatever the circumstances. 
He never blew his cool. 


In the years that remained to him, Bo- 
ıı repeatedly astonished even his fans 


with his depth and versatility as an ас 
tor. He was one star who could appear 
on (he screen unkempt. belching and 


emaciated, and still inspire vast allection 
fom audiences. À natural choice for the 
role of the seedy adventurer corrupted 
by greed in John Huston’s The Treasure 


of the Sierra Madre, he turned in a 
masterful performance, And in 19 
managed to steal ап Academy 


right out from under Marlon R: 
Stanley Kowalski in A Streetcar Named 
Desire with his river-rat impersonation 
of Charlie Хамо in The African 
Queen. Speaking of his rawboned co- 
stir, Katharine Hepburn, Bogart admit- 
ted he couldn't stand her for the first 
two weeks, “She talked to you like you 
were a microphone. She didn't want 
any answers” But then he began to ad- 
mire the lady, and between them they 
made an unusual and alfecting romance 
out of the pairing of a dyspeptic rumpot 
and an ironswilled (and ironclad) old 
maid caught in German East Africa just 
alter the outbieak of World. War One. 
Bogart gave several other fine ренот 


ances—notably in Beat the Devil, The 
Caine Mutiny, Sabrina and The Bare 
foot Contessa—before cancer. of ihe 


cut him down in 1957. 
tor Richard Brooks has ascribed 
the Bogart cult that arose alter his death 


то iwo main factors. one thing 
Brooks told writer Ezra Goodman, “he 
was not a sentimentalist.. Thats im 
portant to people today. ICs not а 
sentimental world we're living in as lar 


as the youth is concerned today. Secondly, 
his reladonship with womc the 
screen. In. Casablanca, when it came time 


on 


for him to make he loved a 
woman, he fous! st the movie 
clichés like "I lov nd 1 cart live 
without you’ He played it and he 


played off against 


When Bergman 


attempted to take his passport at gun- 
point, he flagrantly ignored the menace 
of the pistol, walked right up to her and 
embraced her, saying, “II make it easy 
for you.” Under those conditions, Ingrid 
ply couldn't pull ihe wigger- 

Since 1965, books about Bogart have 
been rolling off the presses; of all the 
5 ars of the Fortics—male and fe- 
male alike, these works invariably assert 
—he was the опе who most completely 
typified the period. Bur as Brooks has 
suggested. his lingering effect is perhaps 


duc less to his being symptomatic of 

me {һап to а more contemporary rele- 
vance. He managed—5ll manages—to 
reflect a kind ol simplistic truth and 


honesty in 


world gone rouen. Не paid 
thin lip service to the law; he endured 
savage beatings that left him bruised but 
spiritually unbroken: and in film after 
film he would mouth his defiance of the 
corrupt powers that. be. right up to the 
moment their bullets ripped him apart. 
One can only imagine the obscenity with 


which he would, very likely, have 
greeted the French intellectuals worship 
of him and “the existentialist sad 


ness” he supposedly represented. Never- 
theless, long after his death, such French 
film stars as Jean-Paul Belmondo and 


the American expatriate Eddie Con 
sandine continue to slink around 
on screen in raincoat or trench coat, 


emulating both his garb and his man- 
nerisms: while the fantasy myth of the 
uncorrupuble, indestructible but alto- 
gether hedonistic defender of the faith, 
which he embodied, survives today in the 
even more invincible James Bonds und 
Matt Helms. “AN he Bas to do to dom- 
inate а scene is enter it” Raymond 
‘handler once said about Bogart. In 
sense, he is still dominating the scene. 


During the early Forties, despite Hol- 
lywood's paviotic efforts to give the 


impression that it lived cleanly and 
thought only of winning the War, scan- 
dals continued t0 raise their unlovely 
heads—like that which involved the 


handsome, swashbuckling romantic hero 


Errol Flyr Flynn, who once endearing- 
ly described. himself as “a male Mae 


аа 
his more accu 
tume epics with 


g the War years alternated 
wed swordplay in cos 
iplay im such w. 
time adventure films as Desperate 
Journey. Edge of Darkness and Objective 
Burma. Singlehandedly he brought. our 


nation's enemies to heel Back on the 
home front, meanwhile, in. 12, he was 
decor Тог somethi less than gal- 


lantry in action. Flynn suddenly found 
himself charged with that bugaboo of 
the teenagegirl fancier, statutory rape 
accused of having compelled two 
erage girls, Betty F 
atterlec. to submit to sexual intercourse 
on separate occasions, we hasten to 
add. In. California, the minimum penal 
ty for sexual dalliance with a giil under 


sen and Peggy 


18, regardless of her willingness, is five 
years in jail If the charges could be 
Flynn, in his autobiog 
makes it clear that Los Angeles 
district attorney, John Dockwiler. 
did everything in his power to make 
them stick—then he was in grave peril. 
indeed. Although the two all 
dents had taken place over а y 
the D. A. combined them into a single. 
damaging case. Flynn did what many 
Hollywood. personalities have done un 
der similar trying circumstances: He 
called in the noted criminal lawyer Jerry 
Giesler. 

To take up the Beny Hansen accusa 
tion first, it was her contention that 
Flynn had put her 10 bed in a bachelor 
friend's bedroom. ostensibly for a nap. 

d then had whisked off her clothes 
and enjoyed her carnally. Under Gies 
ler's adroit crossexamination, she admin 
ted (hat she had been a willing panty 10 
the doings and that she had hoped to 
advance herself in a film carcer by these 
traditional means: but no matter—she 
was 17 at the ume. Flynn denied the 
charge categorically. as he denied Miss 
Satterlee’s story that she (allegedly also 
17. although Gicsler succeeded in raising 
some doubts on that score) had hopped 
aboard his yacht, Sirocco, lor a weekend 
cruise to Catalina and that, en voyage. 
Flynn had spiked her glis of milk with 
е her sleepy and more agre 
- After she had downed her milk like 
а good child, Flynn kissed her warmly, 
she said, and showed her to her ca 
Some sample court testimony by the pig 

« Peggy (who had adopted that han 
style specifically for her court appear- 
ances) follows: 


ed inci- 
part. 


GIESLER: When you heard the knock 
on the door, did you hear 
body say something: 
pracy: They did 


some- 


not wait long 


cnough to say anything. They just 
came in. 
кк: When (hey са in, did 


they 


say anything? 

: 1 said something first. 
Someth bout it being 
id of lite, or something. or what 
PEGGY: No, sir, I noticed he walked 
п before he said anything. I said. 


"You should not be here,” and he 
said. ^b just want lo talk to you 
and I said, "You should not be here 
because it is not nice to come 
lady's bedroom when she is i 
bed... 

GIESLER: Did he sit on the side of the 
hed? 

veces: Well, he did not sit there. 


Guster: He stood the 
precy: He stood in the 
while talking, and then h 
me, well... 

курек: Go ahead and tell us whi 
he said. I would like to have every 
thing he said, 

тишү: Well, he sid to me he just 


doorwa 


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wanted to talk to me, and I told you 
o what Í said, and he said, 
“Let me just get in bed with you 
wl 1 will not bother you. 1 just 
vant to talk to you." And so I said, 
Why do you have to bother a nice 
gir" And I don't remember what 
he said after that . . . 

GIESLER: Did you let him get in bed? 
» No, sir. 

ister: Did he get in bed? 

PtGCY: Yes, sir 

GiEsLER: Did he say anything to you 
about sex before he got into bed? 
veccy: No, he just said I asked for 
it so 1 would get 
GIESLER: That is, after he had asked 
to get in bed and you i 
wasn't nice for him to come 
room where а lady is in bed? 
proey: Yes, sir 

мєн: And then he said, "Well, I 
n't be nice to you," or did he 
that? 

у: Tha when he said, "I 
cd to be nice to you, but you 
sked for й, so you will get i 
LER: When he said that, what 
he do? 

precy: Well, he just walked over to 
the bed, pulled down the covers and 
pulled up my slip and pulled down 
my рашы... 


With this kind of testimony, the cele- 
brated “rape” cise all but drove the War 
news off the front pages. Since Peggy's 
pigtails and bobby sox contrasted some: 
what oddly with her voluptuous appear- 
ance, Giesler not only bore down heavily 
on this fact but revealed that she had т 
cently performed in an abbreviated cos- 
tume at a Hollywood night club. The 
wily attorney also managed to get into 
the record an unsavory sexual episode i 

the girl's past and evidence of an abor- 
tion more than a year after the fling 


with Flynn. Perhaps the high point of 
was Peggy's story of 
with her all 


the trial, however 
how he hi 


as the Sirocco was tacking its way back 
to port. Flynn lured her from the deck 
to the aftercabin, she insisted, on the 
pretext of showing her how beautiful 
the moon looked through a porthole. 
The line she ascribed to him—"Darling, 
look out the porthole. You see that 
glorious moc pursued him for the 
rest of his life. 


published 
autobiography, My Wicked, Wicked 
Ways (which its author impishly wanted 
to tide Ju Like Flynn, capitalizing on the 
popular expression that his celebrated 
Loudoir behavior had made a part of 


the language) he admiued that even 
though the jury of nine women and 
three men returned a unanimous “not 
guilty” verdict, the case had left an 
"enduring scar" upon his personality 
ad took much of the zest out of his act- 
ing. He also lamented the fact that 
pplicd 
ceforth 


the popular vocabulary. Neverthel 
the i le star was soon off and 


doorway at 
baronial home, appeared a nearly print- 
ed notice: “Ladies: Kindly be prepared 
to produce your birth certificate and 
driver's license and any other iden- 
tification marks.” But his сус had al- 
ready fallen оп Nora Eddington, the 
blonde, wellstacked 18-year-old (hc 
checked) cookiepie who ran the cigar 
counter at the Hall of Justice while the 
trial was in progress. A few months later, 
he and Nora were married. (She ap- 
peared opposite him in The Adventures 
of Don Juan.) But his carcer was already 
on the skids. The War over, both his 
combat heroics and the elaborate cos- 
tume adventure films that had been his 
stock in trade were suddenly out of style. 
The publicity given to his preference 
for relatively unripe girls had little to 
do with his decline as a star; it was 
simply that his career ran out of gas. 
Under contract to Warners until 1952 
roles there degenerated to а series of 
cheap Westerns and vain efforts to re- 
capture some of the glamor of his earlier 
pictures. Meanwhile, he had been dri 
ing heavily, was even more heavily in 
debt, had divorced Nora and marvied a 
third time (to Patrice Wymorc) and was 
gathering a reputation as a chaser after 
ever younger women. A few good sup 
porting roles in the late Filties—in The 
Sun Also Rises, Too Much, Too Soon 
and The Roots of Heaven—did much to 
Ivagc his reputation as an actor, but 
not cnough to sal Career. When 
he: on Ouober 14, 
the midst of yet another 
s . with teenage Beverly Aadland. 
Flynn had just turned. 50. The coroner 
who examined the remains stated th 
it was the body of a tired old m 


Flynn's attorney, Jerry Giesler, was 
on hand for at least the first round 
another court battle that was followed 
ay avidly as the news from the battle 
fronts, In а way, the two were related, As 
carly as July 1942, Charlie Chaplin had 
publicly demanded а second front in 
Europe. It was not a popular suggesti 
ary strategists termed it. premature; 

ens wondered by what right 
а noncitizen and a comedian, 
nd that the United States 
nent do anything, Throughout 


could de 
Gov 


the year, as Chaplin continued to speak 
out, public sentiment turned against him. 
It boiled over the following year when 
lush, 22-year-old Joan Barry slapped him 
with a paternity suit; nor was his case 
helped by the fact that, with the suit still 
pending, he married 18-year-old Oona 
O'Neill. Two years earlier, the trial re- 
vealed, Miss Barry had become what 
was cuphemistically called Chaplin's 
"protégée." He had sent her 10 dra- 
matic school, straightened her teeth. and 
bought a play in which she was to make 
her screen debut. No ellort was made to 
ct that in the process, the 
ambitious Miss Barry had also become 
his mistress. What the trial centered 
upon was possible violation of the Mann 
Act—the transportation of women across 
state lines for immoral] purposes. It was 
had actually given 
s he persistently 
calls 1 his autobiography. both 
money and a train ticket to New York 
—but it was just to get her out of 
Hollywood and his hair, he stoutly 
ed. And, he also insisted, it was 
by sheer coincidence that they had met 
gain in New York in October 1942, 
when he had gone East to deliver 
other of his "second-front" speeches. 
Barry herself delivered the trial's most 
bizarre bit of testimony: Returning to 
Los Angeles in December, she spoke of 
breaking into Chaplin's home at one 
AM.. holding him at gunpoint while she 
asked for moncy, and then being so 
med by him ull over again that she 
submitted to his intimacies. As Giesler 
later pointed out, "T still don't believe 
plin, who could have enjoyed 
"s favors in Los Angeles for as 
s 25 cents’ carfare, would pay 
fare to New York, plus her ex pens 
as a guest at the Waldorf "Towers, so she 
would be there for improper purposes 
for one occ; 

The jury eed, for it exon- 
erated the great comedian on all cou 
In the course of the trial, Chaplin, Barry 
nd the baby had all submitted to blood 
tests (Chaplin later revealed that it took 
525,000 to get the lady to consent); and 
the tests scientifically established that 
Chaplin, as he had argued right along, 
could not possibly have been the child's 
father. Nevertheless, through a legal ma- 
neuver, Miss Barry was later able to re- 
open the case: and in May 1946, despite 
the blood tests, the court ordered Chap- 
lin to support the child. His popul: 
was never lower. Father of Miss 
child or not, the great Chapl 
Classic screen comedian, the 
Tramp” of beloved memory—had 
himself in the pu 
100, was now among the morally 
Ci е to believe h 
biography, was sickened by this с: 
hypocrisy, and it was this 
mood that, in June 1946, he beg: 
"black comedy," Monsieur Ferdoux, the 


her 


de- 
ic eye, and he, 


story of a "blucbeard" killer (based 
vaguely on France's notorious Landru) 
who marries, then murders a series of 
wealthy women in order 
comforts for his first wife 


he was only doing on a smaller scale 
what the militarists and munitions mal 
crs do in a big way. "Millions sanctify, 
he murmurs when the trial goes ag: 
him. As the final rites are perlormed, the 
priest concludes, "And may the Lord 
have mercy on your soul" "Why nor?" 
asks Chaplin. “After all, it belongs 
to Him." The film proved a total fiasco 
less for any intrinsic reason than because, 
out of animosity toward Chaplin him- 
self, superpatriotic organizations ріске 
ed, boycotted and wrote threatening 
er managers who were con- 
ag it. Ultimately, United 
Artists withdrew the film from circula- 
tion, а September of 1952, after 
frequent clashes with the press and the 
Government that ranged from back tax- 
cs to alleged Communist leanings, Chap- 
lin and his family left the United 
States to take up residence in Switzer- 
land, He had always wanted to be, in his 
own words, "a citizen of the world.” 
Looking back at his many marriages and 
the numerous scandals that checkered 
his career, one must agree that he was, at 
the very least, worldly. 


Jerry Giesler could hardly complain 
for lack of cases during the Forties. An- 
other leading male star who had need of 
his services in this period was the barrel- 
chested Robert Mitchum, who, in 1948, 


imself faced with a Los Angeles 
grand jury indictment for possession of 
1 conspiracy to possess 


marijuana. Mitchum, born in Connect 
cut in 1917, had attained filmland emi- 
nence with his portrayal of a tough 


Army captain in The Story of G.1. Joc 
(1945). Suddenly the big, sleepy-eved 
actor, whose movie career had Degun 
with bit paris in Hopalong Cassidy 
Westerns, was catapulted into such 
gust company as Katharine Hepbu 
(Undercurrent) and Dorothy McGuire 
(Till the End of Time). RKO, capitaliz- 
ing on his success, rushed him into onc 
picture after another; two of these (as 
well as a third made for Republic) were 
still unreleased at the time of h 

Mitchum, long married and the f 
of two boys, had gone to a “reefer p 
in a cottage in Laurel Canyon, overlook 
ing Hollywood. one night when his wile 
was out of town. According to Giesler. 
who charged that the whole thing was a 
frameup, the actor had barely stepped 
in the door and accepted his first reefer 
when the detectives staged their raid. 
sler also declared that the room had 
a bugged and the press tipped ol in 
ance that the raid was to take place. 
- Mitchum and three others 
d a 20-year-old 
actress—were all booked on suspicion 
lating state and Federal laws. His 


studio, anxious to avoid losing Mit- 
chum's sizable teenage following, im- 
contacted. Giesler: and the 


—he never permit- 
ted the actor to plead guilty or not gu. 
ty, cither of which would have led to a 


to interrupt the bon voyage party, but 
we dock at Yokohama in two hours. 


181 


PLAYBOY 


182 


jury trial and attendant publicity— 
sulted in a mild sentence of 60 days 
the county jail. Mitchum served only 50, 
let off for "good behavior." The public 
proved understanding: some thought 
along with Giesler, that he was the victim 
of a f others that his self-con- 
fessed represented illness 
rather than criminal behavior. His pop- 
ularity has remained undimmed through 
the following decades, despite a reputa- 
tion for pugnacity that is not entirely 
unmerited. (He once, in a fit of pique, 
tossed a Warner Bros. funky into San 
Francisco Bay) But as Mitchum ex- 
plained, “There are these guys who come 
after you at a bar because they equate 
you with the roles you play. I do my best 


10 avoid incidents, but if they happen to 
get rough, 1 usually find 1 can be a little 
Tougher" In other words, art imitates 


life to such an exu 
in self-defense, i: 


ly life, 
te art 


that eventua 
forced to imi 


Muscular Mitchum was only one of a 
number of wartime leading men ele- 
vated to stardom less for their acting 
abilities than for their physical prowess. 
They didn't have ıo move a muscle 
their faces, just so long as they displayed 
their well-developed biceps and torsos 
from time to time Phe beefcake 
they were called; and among them John 
Wayne was undisputed king—or at least 

the Duke,” the admiring and affection- 
ate name that has clung to him through- 
out his lengthy Hollywood career, 
ne, born. Marion. Michael Morrison 
nener lowa, in 1007, almost lite 
gan at the top in movies. After a 
short term as an assistant property man 
for John Ford, he was recommended for 
and got—the leading role in one of 
Fox’ biggest films of 1931, Raoul Walsh's 
epic The Big Trail. Tall (647), rugged 
(а former foorball player) and willing 
to take any risk demanded of him, 
the youthful Wayne knocked himself out 
to make a success of what he recognized 
as his big opportunity: but every dose- 
up, every line of dialog bet 
perate inexperience. He more 
made up for this during the Thi 
however, when he appeared as a West- 
em stunt man, heavy and hero in, as he 
once put it, "more bad pictures than 
yone who has survived in Holly 
wood.” If he was noted for anything 
during this period. it was for his innova 
Чоп of heaving heavy furniture at his 
opponents in countless movie brawls, 
Despite the fact that Wayne's sole repu- 
tation by the end of the Thirties was 
ı quickie cowboy, John Ford remem 
bered his former assistant favorably and 
summoned him when he was casting the 
Ringo Kid role for his classic Western 
Stagecoach (1989). By this time, Wayne 
was ready. The film immediately brought 
him back to the top. 

Wartime audiences, eager for hen 
types, responded favorably to the broad 


boys, 


ved his des- 
than 


shouldered, slow-spoken, rather genial 
giam that Wayne represented —and 
Wayne, quick to perceive the elements 
entering imo his new-found popularity, 
tok pains o accentuate then. He even 
had the doorways on his sets built un- 
dersized, so that he always had to stoop 
making an entrance. John Ford's The 
Long Voyage Home, based on three of 
Eugene O'Neill's short plays about the 
sea, served to consolidate his position as 
an actor; and before long, like Errol 
Flynn. he was off winning the War single- 
handedly for us in such films as Flying 
Tigers, The Fighting Seabees, Back (o 
Bataan and They Were Expendable. 
After the War, he also assumed. par 
responsibility for the fumous П 
in The Sands of Iwo Jima. Ironically 
carly football injury rendered him 
gible for active service in the real W 

Although Wayne likes to claim that he 
isn't much of an actor. actually he is a 
very good one in his somewhat limited 


way. He knows his range and generally 
manages to stay well within it. "Im 
John Wayne." he once said, "and thar 


who the audience wants to see.” An ex 
hih poll taken in 1950 proved him 
eminently right. John Wayne was voted 
number one, and he has remained 
among the top ten with amazing consist- 
ency ever since. 


Another. of 
hoys"—indeed, it was [or him th 
term was invented—was dark 

haired, curvsdipped. srimacins 
Mature, who for a shori period repre- 
sented the very epitome of male glamor. 
When Mature, playing a Hollywood film 


мар, walked out on the stage in Moss 
Harts Lady in the Dark dressed in 
gleaming-white polo togs. a character 


My 


shrieked. dear, what a beautiful 
hunk of mant" The “beautiful hunk 
appellation also clung to him. Born in 
Louisville. Kentucky,” in 1915. Mamre 
developed an urge to act early in life 
and, making his way to Hollywood, ap- 
ed at the Pasadena Playhouse, Hal 
him there and. after giving 
small role as a lovesick gangster in 
The Housekeepers Daughter, confined 
his histrionics to prehistoric grums in 


saw 


him 


One Million B. C. (1940). But if Mature's 
acting abilities were largely concealed. in 
the film, his manly torso was not. Indeed, 


it made such an impression on the girls 
that in virtually every one of his subse- 
quent pictures, the producers took | 
10 provide suitable pretexts for exposing 
it all over ар; 

Rejected by a Hollywood draft board 
for Army service, Mature. joined. the 
Coast G when he returned o the 
sereen. cri that he was some- 
how no longer merely a. pretty boy, that. 
he had attained. both а new dignity and 
distinct signs of acting ability. Не was 
particularly impressive as the gangster 
turned-stool pigeon in Kis of Death. His 


death occurred soon after, 
when, cast as the most famous strong 
of them all in Cecil B. De Milles 
Samson and Delilah, he was called upon 
to have his dark curls immed by the 
seductive Hedy Lamarr and singlehand- 
edly to topple over а vast pagan temple. 
From that time on, in films such as An- 
drocles and the Lion, The Robe amd 
"he Egyptian, he found himself typed as 
the togaed hero of costume spectacu 

On the side, he acted as escort 10 a vast 
list of glamor girls in Hollywood and 
I, in the midFifües he 


own kiss o 


More “heefcake.” but this time in an 
economy sized package, was presented Dv 
thin-lipped. pokerfaced Alan Ladd, who 
enjoyed enormous popularity after his 
first important role, as Raven, the lethal. 
trench-coated gunman in This Gun [m 
Hire (1042) "There no trace ol 
compassion in this trigger-happy hood 
When asked by a character in the pic 
ише how he feels after he has k 
someone, Ladd replies, "E feel 
With cold-blooded sadism elevated 10 an 
rt in wartime Hollywood, the well-con 
ditioned audiences promptly took Ladd 
10 their hearts. But there was something 
more to Alan Ladd than sheer violence. 
There was also in his almost expression 
less face the suggestion of a sensitivity 
that women especially responded. to: 
they wanted to save him from himself. 
to protect him from the consequences ol 
his own ruthlessness. The New Yorker. 
after This Gun for Hire, prophesied 
Ladd would start a whole new 
He did—for himself. 
Ш (5267). baby-Faced, with bleached 
w over dark eyebrows and vivid gre 
eves, Ladd deadpanned his way throu 
The Glass Key and China, in which [y 
the first time he removed his shirt and 
revealed a small but well-muscled torso. 
From that time on, in the more than 40 
films in which he appeared ший his 
death in 1964. the shireremoval bit be 
came the seine obligatoire of nearly all 
Ladd pictures. 
But Ladd’s s 
most us soon as it was pinned on his 
chest. It was resuscitated briefly by The 


that 


r had begun to [ade al 


Blne Dahlia, am above-average Raymond 
Chandler thriller, but after that it was 
downhill again, with his miscisting i 


the title role of F. Scott Fitzgerald's The 
Great Gatsby being of no help at all 
Ther still one more great role for 
him, however, as it tumed ош. George 
Stevens. one of Hollywood's finest direc 
tors, cast him as Shane іп a picture that 
remains a classic Western. On the strength 
of that film alone, Ladd's name must re 
sound in cinema history. No one could 
deny the sheer beauty, the sereen poetry 
which Ladd, clad in 


wa 


of those scenes 
white buckskin, rode out of 
onto the VistaVision sereen to shoo it 
out with Jack Palance, the most evil gun 


nowhere 


fighter of all time, and then rode off Twice (made at MGM), in which he 
in into nowhere. "Shane, Shane— played the hobo hero lured by Lana 
«оте back!" a boy cries, but Turner into murdering her husband; 
Shane had ridden off imo the mythos of but given hall a chance by the script. 
the West, where he belonged. As for Garfield could always be relied upon to 
Alan Ladd, Shane was his last turn in a meulesome performance, He 
Stevens wanted to use him aga proved it in Humoresque, writen by 
Rink (the James Dean role) im Giant, Clifford Odets. in which he played a tal- 
but his wife advised against it; and as he ented violinist from the East Side taken 
stumbled from one mediocrity to anoth- nd bed) by patrones Joan 
he gradually became known as The : and again as the embittered 
t Stoned Face: he had begun to boxer who made it from rags to riches 
turn to drink. Paradoxically, Stevens Abraham Polansky's Body and Soul. 
above all others understood the value of Garfield's ow s were шь 
that face. "Give me an actor with one — doubtedly leftist; convictions 
good expression,” he once said. "and DPH were at times a handicap to his carcer. 
be happy." Ladd had that, and litle else He insisted on appe in plays by 
ood expression that managed to leftist writers, much to. Hollywood's dis 
express everything and nothing. pproval, and contributed openly to var- 

d ious fellow-traveler causes—a course that 
of time during the decade, led inevitably to a subpoena to appear 
hardheaded John Garfield also in 1051 before the House Committee 
ked high on the list of heman heart on Un-American Activities. Although 
throbs. Despite the fact that he could he abjured communism, Gurfield refused 
obviously take care of himself, women in- to name names, His carcer in Hollywood 
stinctively felt that he needed mothering seemed : the in ion also 
—no doubt because in so many of hi estrangement from his 
pictures he played a child of the Depres- childhood. sweetheart ipo he 
sion sadly buffeted by a ruthless fate. In ied in 1034. In New . he 
his сїрїн years at Warner Bros., he starred ting others, among den the 
in no less than 24 pictures, most of them beautiful socialite actress Iis Whi 
designed to exploit his surly virility and On Мау 21, 1952. he died of a heart 
biner determination to make good at all attack in her bed. He was not yer 40. 
cows. Probably his best film during the Quite apart from his talents, which were 
Forties The Postman Always Rings considerable, John Garfield held a 


special significance on the American 
movie scene. He had once, with utter ac 
curacy, referred to himself as “the Je 
Gabin of the Bronx.” What he meant 
was that he had broken through the 
Hollywood stereotype that male sex stars 
must be tall Anglo-Saxon Protestants 
with classic features 
Garfield, born Jules Garfinkle in 
York's Lower East Side, was small, pro 
letarian and Jewish. He deserves credit 
for helping end one form of Hollywood 
discrimination. 


from the East 
Hollywood, 
Ho. 


If a tough Jewish boy 
Side could make good. 
why not the skinny Talian son of 
baken firma nk Sin 
apped by the movies in 1943, he 
weighed only 138 pounds, his cars were 
too large, his neck was scared and 
looked, as he himself put it, "hungr 
Altogether. he was the least likely candi 
date for stardom since Vera Hruba Ral 
ston. What he did have in his favor 
though, was his voice—The Voice, as his 
legions of hysterical teenaged admi 
insisted. Such was their adulati 
he survived early disasters such as High- 
er and Higher (1943) and Step Lively 
(1944). in part because the scrcaming 
and swooning that had accompanied his 
every stage appearance were assiduously 
encouraged by Sinatra's pres agents 
when he transferred his wilens to the 


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183 


PLAYBOY 


184 


screen. Born in 1916, Francis Albert 
inatra was just this side of being a juve- 
nile delinquent. when, in 1933, he hap- 
pened to hear Bing Crosby sing in a 
Jersey City vaudeville house and sud- 
denly discovered a purpose in life, S 
nata decided to emulate him. He sung 
one-nighters in small clubs, appeared 
with the Major Bowes amateur hour, 
toured with one of the Major's amateur 
shows, eventually graduated to the Harty 
James band and then (o Tommy Dor- 

5. In less than ten years, Sinatra had 
made it to the big time. His first solo 
engagement, at New York's vast Para- 
mount Theater, broke all house records. 
Teenagers rioted in the aisles and Times 
Square trafüc was disrupted as thou- 
хап more jammed the streets seeking 
admission. Thercupon, RKO promptly 
abbed the lite fellow and launched 
n on a film care 
ıra's screen personality acquired 
ure when, in 1915, he moved to 
MGM and appeared in that. studio's se- 
ries of starstudded musicals, often in 
tandem wih Gene Kelly: Anchors 


Aweigh, It Happened in Brooklyn and 
On 


the Town. The new Sinatra sell. 
a selassured—began to emerge, 
replacing the gangling, boyish swooncr- 
Gooner. What also began to emerge 
were many unsavory rumors about his 
iyristic offscreen impulses, including 
the story that he had tacked onto the 
door of his MGM dressing room a list of 
its top female stars, then ticked off their 
names as he enjoyed their favors. Al- 
though still married to his first 
Nancy, he was linked romantically 
among others, glamor girs Marilyn 
Maxwell and Ava Gardner (whom he 
married im 1951). P. it was this 
sudden change of that con 
wibuted to his precipitous decline in 
popularity late in the Forties. During the 
War years, his appeal had been to the 
maternal instincts of his young admirers; 
the post-War Sinatra obviously did not 
need mothering. Or perhaps it was mere- 
ly a string of second-rate pictures. At any 
rite, as the Forties were ending, it began 
10 look as if Sinatra's career were ending 
well. His record sales had slumped, 
his golden throat was hemorrhaging, the 
adulation of his fans had declined. and, 
w cap it off, MGM abruptly dropped his 
conuact, Few would have foreseen that 
hin ten years, Frank Sinatra would 
fight his way back to become the biggest 
y in show business. 


persona 


If the War proved an undisguised 
for actors of short stature—men 
such as Ladd, Garfield and Si 
was an even greater boon for 
#ood-Jooking leading man who somehow. 
escaped the Armed Forces. Most of the 
established male stars—Clark Gable, 
James Stewart, Robert Montgomery, 
Robert Taylor—had gone off to war, not 
to return for the duration. With movie 


boon 


nce zooming to almost 90,000,000 
‚ there was an unprecedented op- 
portunity for a talented newcomer to 
win quick favor and establish himself in 
the Hollywood firmament. Of the lot. 
none established himself more quickly or 
firmly than durable, dependable Gregory 


Peck. His manliness, his 
his shy sincerity were all in evidence 
when he made his scrcen debut in Days 


of Glory (1943), an otherwise undistin- 
guished film about guenilla warfare on 
the Russian front; and 
when David O. Selznick cast him as the 
self doubting priest in Keys of the King- 
dom, a handsomely produced picture that 
won him an Academy Award nomination. 
His position as а top star was soon con- 
solidted through films such as Spell- 
bound, Duel im the Sun, Gentlemen's 
Agreement and Twelve O'Clock High. 
Hollywood was sure thar it had clasped 
to its bosom an actor of the first magni- 
iude; the critical confraternity, while 
less certain of his Thespian talents, was 

¢ to concede, їп the words of 
James Agee, "his unusual handsomeness, 
imd his still more unusual ability to 
communicate. sincerity.” 

Although other critics (ended (o feel 
that his conscious underplaving in nu- 
merous subsequent screen appearances 
was rather wooden, and male members 
of the audiences regarded him as dull, 
women found him masculine, depend- 
able, honest as the sun, trustworthy, 
sensitive, intelligent and, in а word, ap- 
pealing. His aura of intellectuality, par- 
ticularly, captured vast sections of the 
female ticket buyers of the postWar 
years. Pauline Kael, on the other hand. 
rather acidly averred, "Gregory Peck is 
not an actor at all; he is a model, and the 
model has become the American ideal.” 
4 to former French journalist 
Veronique Passani, and the father of two 
children, Peck has managed to keep clear 
of Hollywood's scandalmongers—despite 
a previous divorce. In recent years, he 
has become Hollywood's most dignified 
emissary whenever dignity is called for— 
n his recent appointment to Lyndon 
Johnson's National Council on the Ars. 

Actually, in rewospect, one can see 
the Fortics—or, more specifically, 
rked an important trans 
male hero figures. Where dur 
the Thirties the dazzling good looks of 
Robert Taylor, Tyrone Power or Don 
Ameche could be parlayed into a pass 
port to the pantheon, the emerging stars 
of the late Forties were such virile, ath- 
Ietic, noncollarad types as Kirk Douglas 
and Burt Lancaster. Even the relatively 
handsome young men like William 
Holden, Mark Stevens and Dana An- 
drews found it advisable to rough up 
their image a bit once the War was over 
md Bogart reigned supreme. Wholly 
symptomatic was Dick Powell, the fresh- 
faced crooner of innumerable Warner 
musicals during the Thirties; he gained 


even morc so 


1945, 
coat 


а new lease on lile when, in 
he donned slouch hat and trench 
turned private eye and began to 
beaten up regularly by Raymond € 
dler-like hoods. Time also took its toll 
Tyrone Power, James Stewart, Robert 
Taylor and other top stars of the Thi 
ies, as we've noted, went into the Serv- 
ively youthful striplings; by 
ac they returned to the studios. 
the marks of maturity were already upon 
them. As it happened. this proved an ad 
vantage in most instances. Bogart and 
beefcike—the dominant malcness of 
ayne, the arrogant self-suiliciency 
n Ladd and John Garficld—these 

эте the new post War sex sym 


had. bei 
bols No doubt many of Hollywood's 


veterans resumed their ca s with a 


to play juvenile clothes horses anymor 


During the Forties, Americans began 
to see a great many films from England, 
and not merely on the art-house circuit 
This is not too surprising, since Britai 
was our ally: her courage and. fortitude 
under fire generated a wide and sponta- 
neous interest in her people and thei 
way of lile. But somehow, as America 
critics were quick to note, the coming of 
war had spurred a marked improvement 
in British films. As well mounted as our 
own, they often seemed more realistic, 
more intelligent, more mature and far 
better acted, And where, during the 
Thirties, it seemed as if England had 
only two leading men, John Lod 
George Arliss, suddenly its cir 
bristled with a new tribe of singulnly 
attractive males—Rex Hai James 
Mason, Michael Redgrave, 
Wilding, John. Mills and Stew 
cr among them—many of whom were 
destined to make the uck to Hollywood 
On the distaff side, where formerly there 
had been only Margaret Lockwood and 
Jessie Matthews, now we began to see 
such newcomers as the youthful, shining- 
eyed Jean Simmons, the kittenish Joan 
Greenwood, svelte Valerie. Hobson, sexy 
Patricia Roc and the delectably femi 
nine Wendy Hiller. Critics spoke ap. 
provingly of pock-faced Trevor Howard 
and drab, housewifely Celia Johnsor 
the middle-aged co-stars of Brief En- 
counter—perhaps because they provided 
a welcome relief. from tinselly, saccha- 
rine pairings such as Van Johnson and 
June Allyson, which then dominated 
America’s romantic films. Even English 
accents, long anathema at the American 
box office, began to be not only accepted 
but cherished. They had class. 

Not that the B 


itish accent was totally 
foreign to our screen, During the Thir 
tie, de cultivated voices of Leslie 
Howard, Ronald Colman and Laurence 
Olivier enhanced many a romantic rol 
while gruff C. Aubrey 
Hollywood's favori 
Empire and its “thin red Н 


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185 


PLAYBOY 


186 


particularly, scored strongly as the moody 
lovestricken Heathcliff! in Wuthering 
Heights amd as the gloomy propric 
tor of stately Manderley in Hitchcock's 
Rebecca just at the turn of the decade. 
Bur he, like many another member of 
Hollywood's “British colony." so cleverly 
satirized by Evelyn Waugh in The 
Loved Опе, responded to his nation’s 
call when war broke our. With his beau- 
till wile, Vivien Leigh, fresh from her 
triumph in Gone with the Wind, he ve- 
turned to England to play opposite her 
in the patriotically inspired. That Ham- 
iton Woman, a heavily romanticized 
tribute to Lord Nelson. For the rest of 
the Forties, he alternated busily between 
stage and screen. adding to his already 
impressive collection of laurels with his 


(wo Shakespeare films, Henry V and 
Hamlet, which he not only starred in 
but also. produced and directed. Both 


contributed greatly to the mounting 
prestige of the British cinema on the i 

ternational scene, When Olivier returned 
to the United States in 1946, it was as a 


member of the venerable Old Vic Com 
pany, which, with Ralph Richardson, he 
had helped revitalize during the War 
James Mason was also a leading man 
in British plays and films; before emi 
grating to Hollywood toward the end of 
the Forties, he helped restore a favorable 
trade balance for the British film indus- 
uy through his imense performances as 
а sadistic villain in The Man in Grey, 
the crippled m The Seventh 
Veil, the wounded terrorist in Odd Man 
Ош. and many more. Curiously, with his 
mellifluous voice and h: s he 
could make the most scabrous character 
seem sympathetic, even romantic. Holly- 
wood. understandably. chose to empha- 
size the more romantic aspects of his 
nature in films such as Pandora and the 
Flying Dutchman and The Story ol 
Three Loves: but from the carly Fifties, 
he asserted his preference for meatier, 
more ancaningful acting roles than. gen- 
erally befall a handsome leading man 
For one thing. his concentration on 
Character parts, such as Rommel in The 


ciam i 


united ce 


COCHRAN 


“Tve heard all about you terrible white hunters and 
how you always seduce your clients! wives!" 


Desert Fos and the ill-fated) Norman 
Maine in A Star Is Born, lias undoubt 
edly prolonged his career. (He made his 
stage debut in 1931, has been in films 
since 1935.) But no less important, Ма 
son has always maintained that only 
character roles provide him with the 
challenge and simulation he requires. 

No such lofty thoughts, in all proba. 
bility entered. Stewart. Granger's 
tousled head. The darkly handsome 
young actor, invalided out of the Black 
Watch early in World War Two, was im- 
mediately in demand for romantic leads 
on stage and but his carcer 
zoomed into orbit when he played Phyl 
lis Calyert’s lover in the costume melo 
drama The Man in Grey (1943). From 
that time on, he was rarely out of cos 
ume. Turning out im quick succession 
such films as Fanny by Gaslight 
and Cleopatra and анаан, he 
soon being referred to as "the British 
Robert Taylor" Although MGM al 
ready had the American Robert Taylor 
under contract, as the Forties were 
ending that studio brought him to thc 
United States for the eminently success 
ful King Solomon's: Mines (1950) and 
such glittering remakes as Scaramouche, 
The Prisoner of Zenda and Beau Brum 
mell. From 1915 to 1949, Granger 
topped the list of British stars in box 
olhe popularity. and for a time it 
looked as if he might attain a similar rat 
ing in this country as well: but as the 
vogue for swashbuckling melodramas de. 
clined. so did his career 

At the peak of his glory, Granger of- 
ten appeared im films opposite either 
Margaret Lockwood or Patricia Roc. 
Britain's two most popular leading la 
dics during the Forties. (These were the 
girls, it will be remembered, who helped 
spuk rhe battle of the cleavage com 
mented upon in Part X, War and Peace 
in Еторе, vLayeoy, September 1966.) 
The two eventually came [ace to face— 
or, more precisely, bust to bustin The 
Wicked Lady (1945), in which cach те 
vealed equal amounts ol décollerage. 
This was achieved by cleverly constructed 
bodices that squeezed the breasts so tight- 
ly together char a deep and intriwuin 
deft appened between them, Unfort 
nately for American. viewers, the British 
producers, under attack from American 
distributors and Code authorities, reshot 
the bodice sequences with the ollending 
clea es daintily veiled with lace. 


ever 


seven: 


Caesar 
was 


п France, him production was badly 


hit by the War and its allermath and, as 


a result, few new sex stars were devel 
oped—a dearth that was generously 
rectified in the subsequent decade. Mean 


while, however, the greatest French star 
of the Thirties, Jean Gabin. had made 
his way to Hollywood to escape the Ger- 
man Occupation, He way placed under 
contract by 20th Century-Fox. but that 
studio had little idea of what 10 do w 


him. After several false starts, he con 
pleted tw 
nd The Impostor (released 
melodrama about the Free French forces 
But both he and Holly- 
they were not meant 
in June 1915, he sailed 
the Free French, won 
the Crois de Guerre and the Medaille 
aire for his part in the fight against 
many, marched in the victory parade 
in Paris in August. 1044. and resumed 
his professional carcer—with Dietrich 
in Manin Roumagnac (The Room Up- 
stairs). "ME E had stayed in the United 
States when everyone che was fighting a 
war.” he once said, “1 could never have 
set foot in France again." It took a while 
for his public to adjust ro ап olde: 
heavier, craggier hero than they had re 
membered from the Thirties: but by the 
arly s, he had discovered Гог him- 
self yer another image—the old pro. the 
likable hasbeen. the man no longer 
touched by emotional involvements. Al- 
though he is now well into his 60s, it is 
sill working for him. 

With the liberation of France. Am 
can audiences began to see some « 


wood knew t 
Tor cach other: 


^ 


the 
films that had been stockpiled by the Oc 
сира 

their 


n. ай t0 mcct 
favorites from. the 


agaim some of 

luc Thirties. 
erre Blanchar. whose burn- 
ntcllectuality wrung 
"s in Grime and Punishment 
Bal Handse 


as well: but in 
tured into a 
15 no longer 
anybody's dircambo 
a Pierre Aumont and. Charles Boyer 
d long since departed for Hollywood. 
of course: amd La chose first 
French film was Le Corsaire (1939). 
joined them there soon after the War had 
ended. During the War years, the only 
other male lead of any distinction to 
emerge way the coldly handsome, blondly 
Myan Jean Marais, whose appeal was 
limited: French. critics frankly deplored 
the absence of eligible young leading 
men in their cinema. But soon after the 
War, this was offset by the appearance of 
the sensitive, poetic. sadly short-lived 
Gerard Philipe and by the equally poetic. 

“| possibly even more sensitive mime, 
Jean-Louis Barrault, Unfortunately, both 
were such consummate artists thar it was 
difficult for the general public to think 
ol them as sex symbols. 

On the 
did 


was back 


the 
superb ch 
likely to. become 


meantime. 


T 


American 
take to pretty, piquant 
Micheline Presle as De Maupassant’s pa. 
triotic prostitute in Boule de Suif and. 
in Devil in the Flesh. as the married sc- 
ducuess of an inexperienced. bey. Mi- 
chéle Morgan. who had spent the W 
years in Hollywood, returned 10 France 
lor Symphonie Pastorale, in which, once 
more, she represented feminine 
cence combined with physical 


au- 
diences 


inno- 
allure. 


Vivacious Danielle Darrieux, whose per 
formance in Mayerling brought her to 
Hollywood in the latc Thirties, returned 


10 France during the War ycars and later 
ppeared in many films, among them the 
witty Occupe- Toi d'Amelie and La 


Ronde—bur the suspicion of collabora 
tionism hung ever over her lovely head. 
Most. fascinating of all by far was the 


stately Arletty, who, by the Forties, was 
distinctly middleaged but, as they say, 
hardly looked it. No one who saw her 


chef осите, as Garance in Children of 
Paradise, would have guessed that the 
role was played by a woman of some 
yours. For many American sophisticates, 
Arley came to represent ihe. quines- 
sence of the mature, agreeably sex-con- 
scious European woman who demanded 
litle and. accepted much, as long as it 
was pleasurable to her, Some of this е 
trancing quality managed to rub olf on a 
later French star, Jeane Moreau 
less beautiful, but more nu 
to Americam audiences, was Italy's Anna 
Magnani. who. in one burst of creative 
y. established. an cutircly new act 
ing style in Maly just as the V “са. 
Although her role was nor large їп Ro 
berto Rosseltini’s Open City, in which she 


yed the mistress of a Resistance lead. 
she was so persuasive, natural and, 
above all. earthy thar it seemed the 


cimera was discovering something out of 
real Ше rather than photographing a 
perfa e She had th dark 
hair of a washerwoman: her upper lip 
was shadowed by a slight fuzz: her arm. 
pits were unshaven, her teeth irregul 
meets her end rum 


tuck crying her lover to pris 
German ollicer gives an order and 
she is shot down before the shocked eyes 
of her neighbors. She falls gracelessly, her 
dres disurranged and. her white thighs 
exposed —4à literal rendering of the kind 
of atrocity photograph then so € 
And yet she fascinated. Overnight. 
Time put it, “the narrow. highways and 
byways of Italy were crowded with ‘Mag 
nani. who trumped their hair down 
over their eves. ripped a few st 
seams in their cheap colton prints, 
generally made a sensual virtue of post 
War economic necessity." The style was 
called. neorealismo. 

Who was Ma She was by no 
means one of the many amateurs who 
jostled their way imo the Talian neo- 
realist film movement. but a talented ac 
tess who had worked in Mussolini’s film 
industry since the mid Thirties and. bad 
also а 


hieved some reputation as а chan- 
leuse in Rome's les-lancy night dubs. 


Bom in Egypt of Halian parents in 
1909. she attended a dramatic: school 
when she was 17, then joined a run- 


down road show as a singer. Her first 
film appearance was in the title role of 
The Blind Woman of Sorrento (19 
Shorily thereafter. she ed f 
rector Gollredo Alessandrini, made a few 


films with him and bi 


to display the 


volcanic propensities for which she 

since been. nated. When she discovered 
her husband enjoying a clandestine ren 
devvous with another woman, she 
evidenced her displeasure by ramming 
his cir with hers. Soon after t LWO ve- 


hicles were separated, the two principals 
in the crash separated as well. For several 
grid Berg appeared 
ene—Magnani was Rossellini's 
although the relationship. was 
ver one tha hı be called stable. It 
was not uncommon for them 10 toss 
crockery at each other in public, and theit 
exchanges of fine Italianate curses be 
came legendary. “L had to become ан 
tress,” she once said. "Otherwise. 1 think 
1 would have become a great criminal" 

Her final film with Rossellini was The 
Miracle, which, although produced in 
1918, was not widely shown in this coun 


vears—until I 
on the s 
mistress. 


wy until 1952. In it, Magnani м set 
as а simple-minded peasant gil who 
believes iha she has been impres 


nated by $t Joseph, for whom she has 
mistaken a passing stranger (played by a 
slender Federico Fellini). Mocked cruel 
ly by her fellow villagers. she gives | 
to her child alone and unassisted 

film ends as the girl opens her blouse to 
nurse her baby. In an unforgettable last 
doscup, Magnani's face is seen wearing 
1 ex pression of beatific pride. a common 
woman transfigured into a Madonna. Al 
though hailed in Haly, the film deeply 
ollended Catholic sensibilities in this 
country, amd it took a Supreme Cour 

decision to get the film into release. 

A new era had begun. A decade that 
had opened with Beuy Grable ended 
with Anna Magnani. Legs were being 
replaced by bosoms, escapist romance by 
corealistic. earthiness. During the Fif 
ics, the sex stays—an increasingly inter 
ational throng—were to flourish 
never before, to expose themselves more 
freely and to сам ull the represi 
outmoded moralities. And the [f 
dustries both here and abroad пазене 
to bid them welcon i 
lems and. their physica 
the fullest. For the television. amenna 
darkening the landscape. and some 
we was desperately needed to lure th 
public out of its living rooms. Cineram 
and CinemaScope. 3-1) and stercophouic 

all tried, bur somehow non 
succeeded. quite so well as such glorious 
new goddesses as Brigitte Bardot, Sophia 
ind—most fascinating of them all 
ic Marilyn Monroe. 


tributes to 


In their next installment of “The 
History of Sex im Cinema,” authors 
Anight and Alpert examine the cataclys 
mic impact of television on the Ameri 
can scicen, the maturing of movie 
content and the waning power of the 
Code in the wake of pivotal Supreme 
Court. decisions on film censorship. 


187 


PLAYBOY FORUM 


Three women have been sadistically 
knife-murdered here this year. Of course, 
the murderers ave still free, but the cops 
combing bars for whores and arrest- 
ing minors at teenage dances. Th 
are biased. 

If you will present our side of this 
c all men 
(Name withheld by request) 
San Francisco, Califo 


cops 


PLAYBOY 


issue, you 


SYMPATHY FOR DECENT CITIZENS 

It was inevitable that Hugh Hefner 
would eventually write a defense of 
And it was also inevitable 
1 


т 


prostitution 
that his main point would be to bew 
the evils inflicted оп poor 
whores by all of us nasty Christians who 
don't happen to want our cities turned 
ks of filth like Sodom and Go- 
ah. While he was weeping in his 
pagne for all whores, 
though. why didu'y he spare a m 
sympathy for good. ordinary. decent 
Christian. people who. after all. have 
some rights, too? If it weren't lor the 
"unjust laws and the “cruel” police 
whores would overrun our cities and so- 
licit on every street corner. Don't decent 
people have the right to ask the police. 
who receive their wages out of our 
10 keep oi jes clean so that our sons 
can walk home from work at night with- 
out being solicited Dy discasc-ridden 
trollops? Don't we have the right to live 


those poor 


u 


es, 


in a decent, disease-dree community: 
(Name withheld by request) 


"Oh, come in, Marge. 


188 


(continued from page 68) 


THE CAUSE OF PROSTITUTION 
The cause of prostitution is simple: 
chastity i y chaste 
woman, there must be, necessarily, one 
prostitute somewhere, 10 take up the 
slick. This is a law of namre, as ce 
d unalterable as day following night, 
drunkenness following booze, аса fol- 
lowing plague or tax collectors follow 
everybody. You cannot grow pears on 
apple wee; you cannot make wo. plus 
two equal five, no matter how many 
times you add them up: vou cannot keep 
a fish alive out of water: and yon cannot 
have a society of chaste women that is 
not also a society of whores. 
Torrence O Hoolian 
New York, New York 
Hefner will offer his own conclusions 
and recommendations on prostitution in 
the next installment of “The Playboy 
Philosophy.” 


women. eve 


SEX WITHOUT LOVE 

1 have been married for three years 
and have two daughters. During the first 

ar of ош everything went 
c. but shoruy after our first daughter 
was born, а change came over my wife 
She became frigid and stopped showing 
Hection toward me, execpt on 
cisions. Since then, things have gone Irom 
bad to worse. I have suggested recon- 
«аніон, divorce, separation and every 
thing else I could think of, but she 
seems uninterested. She wants to stay with 
me on account of the children, she sa 

1 have found that after seve 


coc 


s of 


TV commercial is about all it takes to 
arouse my desires, so 


We were just talking about you” 


to bed, I can't sleep, and if I do it's only 
for a few minutes, and after E wake up 1 
am really worked up. 

So what am 1 goi 


g 10 do? 


My wile has mentioned the fact that 
animals don't do it all the time. only 
when the female is in heat. D have heard 


this belore: and all 1 have to say is. 
were to mate with every woman withi 
quarter of a mile of my home the way а 
Чоң docs, 1 would probably work myself 
to death within а month. Sex without 
love is nothing to brag about, but I can 
tell you from experience that it is a little 
bit better than no sex at all. 
(Name withheld by ved 
Mesa, Arizos 


est) 


THE DOUBLE-STANDARD BLUES 

Um in agreement with Dr. Ira L. Reiss 
(The Playboy Forum, May 1966) that 
the sex drive ol women 
of men. And I should know: I 23. 
yearold woman, married five and a half 
years, with three children. | know my 


own feelings and desires, and many а 
time 1 have wanted another man. bur if 
1 ever admitted these impulses, my hus- 
band would be hurt and angry. Yet he 
feels perfectly free to say, "So-andoso is 


certainly exciting wom 
women say they want only опе m 
D know for a fact that they are ly 
through their teeth, Women ac faithful 
because they are afraid of society's call- 
ing them w: 


thheld by request) 
Hiloxi, Mississippi 


A MATTER OF CONVICTION 

I recently applied for absentec. voter 
registration in my home state, South 
c . As a prerequisite, 1 was re 
quired to swear before a notary public 
that 1 had not been convicted of a c 
that would disqualify me from voting 
The disqualifying crimes were lised on 
the reverse of the n form 
follows: 


Conviction of any of the follow. 
ing crimes disqua 
istering and vot 
(ning goods or 


false prete Y. forgery, 
robbery, br adultery, bigamy, 
wilebearing, housebreaking, receiv- 


ing stolen goods, breach of trust 


with fraudulent intent, lornication, 
sodomy. incest, assault with iment 
to ravish, miscegenation, larceny, 


id any crime against the election 
laws. Such disqualification may be 
n of the 


removed only by the par 
governor. 


t conviclion 
m afraid. ihat 
would bc as 


1 certainly am grateful th 
is required: otherwise 1 
voters South Carol 
scarce as whales i 


asas, 
Beattie J. Roper, Jr. 
Fort Belvoir, Уй 


THE SAGA OF KATIE MULDOON 

We've had another interest 
case here in Northern Ireland since I 
last wrote you ("Split Level Seduction," 
June Forum). 


Kare Muldoon, our local "good 
thing” (pushover to you), went to the 
local medic and wid him, "Doc, I be 
preg. 

"Who?" quoth the doc 

“Dunno,” she says. "When y' cat a 
plaie of beans, how d° you know which 


опе made you fart?” The doc decides 
that this vagueness won't do, so he hus 
Чез her off to a lawyer who seleets, from 
her paramours, a certain Egbert 
horn. son of a local not the 
manying kind. Egbert soon finds himself 
in court. It appears that the offense had 
taken place in the back of a small van 
being driven to a dance by Egberts 
friend William Bloggs. William's wife, 
Agnes, a nosy old bitch, had adjusted the 


rearview mirror so that she could ad. 
mire Egbert's style, She gave evidence in 


court with great relish, Yes, Kates skirt 
was definitely up: yes. Egbert’s trousers 
were definitely down. Was introduction 
effected? She couldn't say for sure, but 
he had certainly wied. “But it was a very 
Ш van," she added. “It would have 
difficult. 

said Delense Counsel, “t 
“ He was 
h concent 


Ye 


very 


his alcohol. 
t this point a scraping noise at the 
back of the courtroom was seen to be the 
Defense Counsel's minions, heaving in a 
sort of wooden box, and followed by De- 
fense Counsel Junior, clutching a female 
tailors dummy and looking rather 
sheepish, as it was well known that this 
was probably as close as he had ever got 
to the real thing 
“1 submi” said 
“ihat the alleged 
have here a wooden 
side dimensions of which are exactly sim- 
r to those of the van concerned in this 
cast." And immediately, clutching the 
dummy, Defense Counsel squeezed. him 
self into the wooden frame. Being very 
fat, and net very lexible, dilliculty was 
perienced in even getting in, let alone 
much. 
The court w 
hea 


Defense Counsel, 
ct was impossible. I 
mework, the in- 


s hushed as, with much 


the 


ug and panting, wee man 
endeavored, unsuccessfully, 10 present 
his “unspeakable” regions to the 


printable” portions of the dummy. | 
ing proven to his own satisfaction. that 
the offense couldn't have been. commit- 
ted in the available sp climbed 
back out 

My client has no case to answer,” he 
shouted. “We'll get cs Bloggs lor 
perjury. My cliem was dry riding." 

At this point, Egbert himself spoke 
up: “Dry-riding be damned.” 
“You're a stupid far fool 
bang а shotgun with a hair trigger.” So 


OS ED 


“Frankly, Га rather 


be in the United States 


where they re having a sexual revolution! 


ig, Egbert vaulted into the wooden 
grabbed the dummy and etlected 
L an introduction as you exer siw. 
His face was covered with triumph 
he got the choice of six months 
or a life sentence with Katie, He chose 
latter, and thus one mans pride 
ne before his fall. 

This story. like my last one, is based 
on fact. The names have been changed to 
protect the. guilty. 

Patrick R. Cowdy 
Bangor, North Leland 


ONE SEXPOT VS. 100 CHAPLAINS 

In view of Jo Collins’ visit to Vict- 
the enclosed. story from The Salt 
Tribune may be of interest to you: 


n 
Lake 


ew Orleans— The pla of 
Bourbon Street” claimed Wednes- 
day that visits of Hollywood starlets 
10 Vietnam have done more to un 
dermine morale of American fight- 
g men than Viet Cong bullets. 

эпе sexpot can undo the work 
of 100 chaplains,” said the Reverend 
Bob 1 just returned from 


а wip to the embattled country 
the visit of one of those 
Volupimous entertainers,” he went 
L “the boys are so stirred up rhat 
things begin to happen. Consulta 
tions with the chaplain, chapel at 
tendance and letters home 10 mother 
fall oll akumingly.” 


Do you think all those mothers who 

didn't get letters wil ive you? 
Robert J. Barry, M. D. 
Owyhee, Nevada 


“The Playboy Forum" offers the oppor- 
tunity for an extended. dialog between 
readers and editors of this publication 
on subjects and issues. vaised in Hugh 
M. Hefners continuing editorial series, 
“The Playboy Philosophy” Four booklet 
reprints of “The Playboy Philosophy.” 
including installments 1-7, 8-12, 13-18 
and 19-22, are available at 506 per book- 
let. Address all correspondence on bath 
“Philosophy” and "Forum" The 
Playboy Forum, Playboy Building, 919 N. 
Michigan Ave, Chicago, Hlinois 60611. 


to: 


189 


PLAYBOY 


190 cducaed playboy, Esci 


TROPIC OF CUBA 


hen Kissed her. 

who brought us platters 
t 

as "Don 


dressed Hemi 


gs 


Hoppy. the grinning, opiumdoped 
Chinaman, sold Hemingway paper cones 
filled with peanuts. Hemingway and 


Hoppy were old friends. They rated 
away laughingly in a code that escaped 
me. И struck me that Hemingway was 
inordinately fond of his inferiors. 

With my background of paisano blas- 
phemy and years as a construction work- 
cr, profanity 1 
like good bre 
ingway's scatological 
lent to me a 


d always been at home, 
1. in my mouth. But Hem- 
hguage was repel- 
d exceeded. any 
obscenity 1 was capable of. 

He bored me with talk of big 
fishing. boxing and bulls. In my tw 
expanded upon the fine art of gir] hunt 
ing and the incomparable joys of all 
lovemaking positions. 

Hemingway was annoyed and said my 
skull was crammed with vaginas. I told 
him that if he thought it was all in my 
head, he should come along with me to a 
whorchouse and find out which of us 
Was the better man. 

I saw Hemingy 
He was staying 
hotel for Cul 
hos Mundos. 


а [ew more times 
the Ambos Mundos, а 
The sign of the Am- 
vas two globes of the world. 
Jt was aditional to gamble for the 
drinks at (he Ambos Mundos bar. We 
threw four dice [rom a leather cup with 
the barkeep for double or nothing, The 
dice always сате out right for Heming- 
way. I couldn't keep up with the hairy, 
big guy in drinking. Fm a menace when 
Ive had too much. After a flock of 
drinks, 1 got drunk and critical, Anyway, 
Hemingway liked to egg a guy on. 


My Havana pal and generous self- 
appointed host was Vito, the melon- 
headed. Neapolitan New Yorker who was 
the produce monopolist of Cuba. Like 
the Cuban wags. he called the vagina 
fruta bomba. He would leaure me 
st the bonds of matrimony 

7] manured myself with three wives 
No more wives! Pete, the dollar buys all 
the [уша bomba you want. IF you get 
married, I don't want to know you 

1 was in his office overlooking the 
malecón, the mall. He was on the phone, 
ordering a shiplead оГ ton nd 
pineapples to be dumped at sea because 
the AXP company would not pay the 
price he demanded. 

Business over, he said, "Time for 
sport, You're coming to my favorite 
whorehouse. 1 phoned Prudencia, the 
madre superiora. She read your book in 


oes 


ess 


уз Rolls-Royce, we picked up 
ty doctor. uan, the 
and the Harvard- 


Luis, ihe 


wor 


soc 


Vs 


(continued from page 119) 


Prudencia's residencia de reunión was 
palace. A liveriel servant showed us 
nto the salon, which was splendid with 
re paintings and coats of mail 
Madama Prudencit was an illustrious 
айу with a fine figure and the chaste 
mien of a 
kissed her hand, 
"Welcome to the dulce vida de Cuba. 

The five girls Madama had. a 
[or us arrived. 

She whispered proud 
are pristine, pure amd virginal as di 
monds. This ment in 
my esta 

The nymphets carried. schoolbooks. 1 
remember their names: Ju 
Magdalena, Chuchita and Mar 
sús. They were from upper 

We were served à gourmet 
wine. I chose Maria de Jesús, She wa 
small and thin, a sexy wisp with a 
faced аптасцоп. Mar 
She looked 12. Estel 


youthful аре, When I 
she said graciously, 


lunch and 


t 
said she was 16. 


n told 


ries. The girls giggled and shr In 
the grandiose salon, Madama аме 
pornographic color films accompanied 


by a Brahms recording, We danced with 
our girls and fondled them, Madani es 
cored c r of us to a dreamlike 
bedroom. I felt her hips and whispered 
that 1 preferred her to the kid. She invit- 
ed me to return later and spend. the 
night with her. Madama told me to do 
nything and everything except actual 
enny with Maria de Jesús. 

The vaginal halo is peculiar to 1 
sacrosanct virginity ological 
dowry. the husband's ble right 
to consummare his berroth's mysterious 
hymen. Consequently, the virginal Latin 
girl must imaginatively resort 10 


digital and anal delights. 

Dallying with the naked nymphet 
brought me uvinges of conscience. T 
could visualize her at the айат in the 


symbolic white of purity. dropping her 
eyes modestly as her husband slipped the 
wedding ring onto her finger. Her expe 
riences at Madama Prudencia’s would be 
discreetly forgotien, or perhaps ly 
recalled. But other lile girls would 
come 10 the residencia. de reunión to ac 
commodate rich men 
done. It is how it is done. 

That night 1 was in bed with Madama 
Prudencia, We also talked. She and h 
brother Ramon fought on the side of 
the Loyalists. Her other brother, Rodri 
go, was an ranco officer. Her 
parents heats were tom. Ramón was 
captured by Fi soldiers. Rodrigo 
watched the execution of his brother 
and of the poet Lorca. The sight drove 
f his mind. He hanged himself. 
anco came into absolute pow 


It is not what is 


ardent 


nco 


him ont 


М 


er with the aid of the Fascist and Nazi 
armies, Prudencia gathered her wealth 
and fed to Cuba. She said, “You can see 


for yourself that the great United S 
represented here by greedy bu 
men, gangsters and perverts. 
should offer Cuba 
too blind to do it 
rich will end in Cuba. Th 
olution and civil w. 
Communist society. 
"What will happen to your establish- 
meno” 


ness- 
America 
. But she is 
en of the 
e will be rev- 
followed by a 


will prevail. Aging men, 
capitalist or Communist, want 
inle girls for sex.” 

I pleased her. She said with digni 
“Marry me. 1 will share my fortune with 
you. I will provide you with all the girls 
you desire 
take by not accepting her proposition 
could have avoided many hells, But the 
у thing constant about me is my God 
given compulsive promiscuity. 

Each morning when T awoke and the 
sca air and sum greeted me at my Na 
Чопа! Hotel tentt-floor window, T 
looked forward to the adventure of 
other girl. There was, is and never will 
be anything better in the world ih 

i gil 


wher 


a 


gh lil 
al gambling casino. Na 
asha, the Broadway singing star of the 
floorshow, was my current, One night, 
»usar-king Juan took a shine to Hele 

а doll in the chorus. He had the waiter 
ple J id he 
wanted her to go то bed with him. She 


refused. He placed ten onethousand 
dollar bills before her. She looked hun- 
grily at the money, but still turned h 
down. 1 thought she was a foolish 


nd ater vied to make her. She said th 
reason she had to reject Juan's fabulous 
al was that she was painfully ill with a 
bad dose of gonorrhea given to her by 
jerk Cuban musician in the band. 

Pleasure had become routine. At night 
was the Nacional casino and my girl, 
tasha, on stage, reaching out her arms 
wd throatily singing Smoke Gets 


N 
to me i 


in Your Eyes. We would leave at thice 
A.M. with a group of the rich and world 
famous for the carnival park. Los Fritos, 


watch the drugged voodoo dancers. stop 
in at the waterfront fish-fry dives on the 
malecon and Damer with the wise white 
and black whores, or go 10 peep shows 
and view the professional orgies of Les 
bian and fag circuses, and end up past 
dawn in the lobby of the Nacional Hotel 
drinking chilled Tropicale beer. Fhe 
upstairs to bed with Natasha and not 
arising u [ternoon. 

Ni cois. She an 
noyed me about having to find. positive 
direction in lile. ethics, fidelity. true 
love; she spoke about divorcing her hus 
band and gave me that stuli about 
"Marry me or lose me.” 

1 discussed this danger w 


h Vito and 


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191 


PLAYBOY 


192 


Juan. Juan owned most of Camagüey. 
He wanted me to go to his vast estate 
and write a historical novel glorilving 
his Spanish ancestors who had settled 
c after Columbus’ voyages. their ma 
sacre of the natives, slave traffic and the 


you 
that complains 
ake them ru 
¢ track them, 
them down lik 
don't stand for any Communist shit 

When 1 was alone with Vito, he said 
haughtily, “Me and you; we're Ameri- 
cans. You ain't gonner be the guest of a 
goddamn spick. You go to my Isle of 
Pines plantation, Casa del Rio. and tke 
it easy. Buddy, you're getting too much 
Jinin bomba. You'll burn. yourself. out. 
You'll have the run of the. plantation. 
Il have my pilot Hy you there." 

“Tve never been in a plane. I 
want to fly." 

"OK, take the boat from Bat 
My caretaker, Joha will meet you 
at the Nueva Gerona dock on the Iste of 
Pines.” 

Tt took hours for the bumpy. chlorine- 
ling train to get to Batabano, On 
the way, we passed an insane asylum with 
nightmarish drawings on its walls 

Bataban6 was the port of the spo 
and coral fishers. There was a fleet of 
thei ted shallow-di 


d peon 


bout 
give them 
flush. them 


nd s 
dirty dogs. No, sir; we 


oot 


don't 


nes. 


sm 


ir gaily p: fe sailing 
boats, most of them named after saints 
It was an overnight voyage in a small, 


to the Isle of Pines. 
Vito’ caretaker, Joh: ілу, 
jaundiced German, met me at the Nueva 
Gerona dock. In the ion wagon, 
we drove the ien miles over the red-clay 
ds t0 the. plantation. On 
le resolutions: Isolate 
myself. Stop slcepir om- 
mune only with pencil, paper and type 
writer. Hemingway in a bener moment 
had said, “Pere, you got the ng 
juice.’ " 1 was going to put my juice into 
writing and not girls. No more wasting. 


nes, а g 


h wo 


ci 


wri 


Casa del Rio was a wonderland of 
nt foliage, tropical wees, fruit and 
citrus orchards, pastures and ihe thaich- 
roofed bohios of the peons. My quarters 
were in the U shaped Spanish mansion. 
nes unpacked my bags and said, 
Vio gave me instructions th 
you were to be the boss here and have 
anything you want. Anything, positively 

I sat at a desk with sheets of paper. I 
got up. paced and squ I didn't 
have a cause, an idea. Finally I typed, “1 
don't want to write or worry or fight for 


med. 


anything. To hell with responsibility. 
АП 1 want are women and fun. Period." 
By late afternoon 1 had had enough of 


own 
no 


com! 
breasts 


ny. An edifying book 
nd a typewriter no 


my 
has 


girl's thighs. 1 wasn’t Onan. Nor could I 
conjure а woman from my ribs. Myself 
gnawed me. It was not before or alter, 
but the fleshy moment that counted. I 
went to Johannes’ bohio and told him 
Га have dinner with him, He was em- 
barrassed. A master should be a master. I 
told him that writers were a classless 
breed who becime the same as the 
people they were with. Vito's liquor 


cellar was under the bohio. I had. Johan- 
nes bring up boules of. champagne. 
“I can't drink alone,” I said. "You've 


drink with me. 

, I do what Mr. Vito's guest says. 
Absolutely. 
He asked me what I wished for din 
ner. | told him to surprise me. He 
suggested marinated iguana, jellied black 
parrots, pheasant, wild rice, fried ban: 
and coconut ice cream. 1 agreed. He wi 
to the doorway and shouted, “Liz! Liz, 

come here, you jungle bitch!” 


got to 


tall. svelte, dreamy young Negress 
appeared. He gave her orders for the 
dinner. 1 had never been with a black 
girl. My desire lor her was instan 


tancous, like a volcano erupting. 

Johannes and I sat at the kitchen 
table. ‘The champagne made him talk 
about himself. 

Thirty years before, he had been an 
immigr ver im a Massachusetts 
mill. W cime home unexpectedly 
e in bed with his best 
1 minister, he walked 
to Boston and boarded the hist Ireight- 
er he saw. The ship's destination was the 
Isle of Pines. He went to work for Vito 
and never set foot off the island 

Liz came in with a brace of pheasants. 
I could not take my eyes from her as she 
tended the charcoal stove, prepared the 
birds and moved sensuously about. 


“Johannes,” 1 said, "I want sweet Liz 
to drink us" He was star- 
ied. sh m questioningly. I 
poured her champagne. She did not ac- 


cept the goblet as 1 held it out to lu 
Johannes barked, "Don't stand. there 
like an ape bitch! Obey the gentleman! 
Drink with Mr. Vito's honorable guest 
and drink jolly. by Christ! 

Night fell. After Liz put the strange 
dinner on the table, E had her sit by my 
side. Her nearness had me in a spiraling 
knot. I was drawn to her uppointing 
breasts, perfect ears, hands, and tight 
round black knees close ro mine. 1 ci- 
ressed her knees under the table. I barely 
touched my dinner. Liz was the food T 
wanted. My plan was to get us all drank 
and then tke Liz to my bed. I had 
Johannes open boule upon boule of 
champagne. Liz stood up and leaned 
over to Clear the table. 1 could not resist 
running my hand up under her dress 
long the hard smooth thighs and firm, 
curved, polished magical buttocks. 

Johannes watched me intently. Sud- 
nly he asked, "Sir, you like Liz? 
"OL course—she's wonderful!” 


di 


you thinking of sleeping with 
Liz 

"Why not—that would be gre 

Through my cl 
him peering at me weirdly. He blurted, 
“Mister! Liz is my wile!” 

D struggled to sober up 
guish our positions, 

Now, goddamnit Johannes, why 
didn't you tell me in thé beginning that 
Lir is your wife? 1 wouldn't touch 
other man's woman, but I'm no mind 
reader, goddamnit! 

“I thought а gentleman would be dis 
gusted and insulted if J told him I mar 
ried a nigger.” 

‘Johannes, we're not in u 
racial Amerie 

‘Would the gentleman still care ıo 
sleep with my wife?” 

I didn't answer. His square head wa 
vered. He read me. He grined his teeth 
and sweaty purple veins stood out on his 
pale forehead. 

“Liz.” he glowered, “you heard the 


nd distin- 


civilized, 


gentleman's desir 

She nodded. He bellowed, "On th 
phone, Mr. Vito gave me instructions 
that his guest. the genüeman, was io 


have quickly anything he wanted! What 
the hell are you waiting for! Go to th 
big house. Get your black.bitch 
and thing in the wb with hot water and 
plenty sweet-smelling soap! Put on nice 
perfume and powder! Then come 
with a fancy flimsy, schnell! 

During her absence, the 
German and I drank urgenil 
Liz returned, in a 


ass 


топ veil of negl 
gee, exotic from bath, perfume and make 
up. Johannes grabbed her arm brutally 
and shoved her toward me. “Go with the 
gentleman and see you give him the best 
time! 

Liz straight features and mouth were 
childlike amd suluy. Her body рш 10 
shame her sisters ol other races. In. Liz, 
2od had designed the most desirable 
ly dark. With 
Liz 1 enjoyed the virtue of uncondition 
al lust. 1 savored that animal ple 
closest to the truth of nature. 

1 caught the mad fice of Johannes 
gazing through the window. I snapped 
out the bed lamp. Liz drawled con- 
fidently. “The ole man aint gouner do 
nothing. Mr. Vito's the Lord 10 him. А" 
1 guest.” 
rd him stomping around 
grounds of the mansion, howling 

i ed with shotgun 
blasts. After his drunken. yawps ceased, 
the surrounding jungle became fraught 
with the sereeching of peacocks, twit 
ig of nightingales, chauering of mon 
keys, satire of parrots, hooting of owls 


form and colored her dee 


and the confusion of other creatures. 
1 awoke to find myself alone. The 
moiling heady spoor of Liz was on the 


silken sheets. Johannes came to the door 
to tell me that Liz would draw the bath 


193 


PLAYBOY 


and serve breakfast at my convenience. 
Liz was with me nights while Johan- 

nes. outside, made berserk noises and 

tore up the landscape. In the mornings. 

everything would be serene, Liz working 

with the servants and Johannes anxious 
cater to me. 


Nue! 
tow! 


1 Gerona was a ramshackle river 
with docks, bars, a church, bank, 
dance hall, gas station, farm-implements 
gency, telephone. building, slaughte 
house, filthy Hy-ladem restaurant and 
wkets and unpaved streets. ОЙ the 
thoroughfare were packed rows of 
thatch- and tin-roofed hovels with walls 
of dried clay. They were the same: carth- 
en floor, sunless interior, fowl, swine and 
goats running in and out, an unkempt 
and behind, on 
wall, the inevitable lithograph of 
Lady of Sorrows. When seeing a 
ager roaming by. it was not unusual 
for the man in the doorway to bring out 
а ragged, barefoot, hardly teenage girl 
nd offer her to the wanderer for 50 
cents or des. On I was 
tempted; the litle girl wa prety, 
all soulful eyes; but the hopeless sc 
1 expresion on the childs face 
ed me. Or was it because 1 had 
been told that tuberculosis, leprosy and 
other diseases infested the peons? 
Near Nueva Gerona, on a plain barri 
caded by marbled heights and dense for- 
ests. was the presidio modelo. Under the 
glaring sun stood the high limc-coated 
Grcular model prison. The comman 
dam, 2 stout Batista army officer with 
sideburns and mustachio. was happy to 
show me the place. He took me inside to 
the center of the drum-shaped structure. 
rom that hub, no movement could 
le notice. Within the dramatic con- 
cave there were four ters of unbroken 
balconies fronting the bar 
word from the commandant a 
doors opened mechanically. Convicts 
cime out of the cells and lined the rail- 
ngs. The majority were Negroid, their 
blackness contrasting starkly with the 


father in the Чоогу 
the 


ion, 
ve 


sha 


e 


whitewash of the prison. 

I saw chained convicts working the 
marble quarry, in the forest felling eb- 
ony, mahogany and gu: trees; oth- 
crs making floor and rool tiles, and a 
number making cordage from the bark of 


the majagua nee. There seemed to be as 
y armed soldier-guards and dange 
ous dogs as there were. prisoners. 
"Most of these men were convicted of 
political crimes against the govern- 
ment" said rhe commandant. "They 
subscribe to for doctrines 
and therefore must be treated as vermin. 
Whoever d down and 
shot dead on sight. Also those who give 
them ıefuge—even a glass of water. No 
one has Hed the presidio. and lived.” 
The prisoners appeared to be nothing 


n radical 


escapes is hui 


194 but simple peasants. 


At a quay in Nueva Gerona was a 
sponge-fishing boat, the Santa Isidora. 
Next 10 it. a luxury cruiser. the Sturgeon. 
On the Surgeon's deck was a slim 
blonde sunning herself. The sponge 
fishers had brought a pig [rom the 
slaughterhouse. They cut it apart, salted 
the pieces away in buckets and gave the 
heart, liver, d brains to a 


atestines 
who wrapped them 


covetous. policenta 
in burlap and left with elation. 

The racy girl on the Sturgeon and I 
smiled at cach other, She beckoned me 
to come aboard, Her name was Alice. 
She made martinis of vodka and sake. 
Alice was from Cleveland. She was on 
her honeymoon. Her husband had been 
called away to negoti defense con- 
traci. The Second World War was in the 
air. He was making a lot of money. The 
Sungeon belonged (o her father, Dr. 
Farber. Alice said casually, "Dad. 
tecting me from sin until my hus 
returns. Mother Mary, I'm bored.” 

Without ado, we discussed se 


"There's one way 10 get around Dad 
so that we can be togethe 
about 


He's nuuy 
ay along with him 
һ packets 
osy cheeks, a 
ad glassy 
bout to let me 


Hitler. Pi 
Farber came aboard w 
L He was Гай, 
Charlie Chaplin 
blue eyes. He was not 
get next (o his dau 

Alter a few perlunciory visits, | con- 
fided to Dr aber that I hated the Reds 
and loved Hitler. His eyes glowed. He 
expounded Nazi ideology for hours. 

I echoed everything he said. He trem- 
bled with joy. 

"Your heart is in the right place,” he 
said. "You are highly intelligent—finc, 
fine. 1 wust you! 

He took me to his cabin, showed me 
his two-way shortwave set and tuned in 
Berlin. On the wall was a painting of 
Hitler, daggers and а swastika flag. He 
asked me breathlessly, "Would you rai 
your arm and heil the Führer with mc? 

1 joined him in Aeiling. After that, he 
asked me to do him the favor of keeping 
is lonely dau company and to help 
him safeguard her virtue, When he left 
on an overnight hush-hush mission to a 
fellow Nazi's plantation, Alice and I 
spent the night and the following day on 
the bed i rotica beneath the 
it of arber's 
blessings, Alice my guest ш Vito's 
Casa del Rio foi 

I had only two other girls during my 
Isle of Pines holiday: short, husky, freck 
Pamela, daughter of a Canadian 
ушап who was obsessed with locat 
and 
ket 


hier. 


led 
cler 


ng 
Chinese girl, lisome, almond С 
whose futher had a crude bar for peons 
oll of Casa del Río in a jungle clearing 
where once fourished a village that w 
leveled by the 1926 humicane, 


pinne measure in ghe sea: 


nd 
ihe 
word 
s left 
nd 1 
She 


I used to drive to the jungle D: 
shoot pool and drink beer with 
peons. The Chinaman never said 
to me. One night, after the рео 
and her father retired, Cricket 
made love atop the pool table. 
tasted like doying lichi nuts. 


On February second, Nueva Gerona 
celebrated the candelaria, the purifica- 
tion of the Virgin Мату, The main street 
was thronged. Peons came by foot, burro, 
oxcarts and irucks belonging to the plan- 
tation owners from McKinley, Los Indios, 


E 


Barbar 
and 
on horseback or in large expensive autos 
covered with the dust of the red-clay 
roads. There was no consciousness of skin 
color. Commingled were Spaniards, Indi 
ans, whites and blacks, with their chil- 
dren ranging [rom sepia 10 high yellow. 
What did stand out sharply was the 
distinction beween ridh and poor, 
master and vassal. For every 30 macheteros 
(peons toting cane knives on their sides) 
re was а stermfaced  capataz—hoss 
man, а veritable conquistador—weari 
uma, embroidered shirt. whit 
jacket. cartridge belt and pistol. 
Vendors sold fried chicken, fish, snails, 
rice, sausages. hot peppers and black 
beans. The delicacy of the peons was 
roast pork. Brisded greasy fat, meat and 
bones, blanketed with enormous green 
flies, were cut w and- 


wiches. The affluent drank Pepsi-Cola 
and xa-Cola. Others wened their 
mouths with rum, beer or fruit juices. 


The children sucked raw sugar cane. 

Plantation owners and overseers sat in 
the cool of arcades gambling at cards 
Peons grouped humbly about, amazed at 
the sight of mounds of pesetas. For those 
who wore shoes or boots, there was the 
status ritual of having their footwear 
shined—even though minutes later they 
were ag n 
the one stilling dance hall, youths did 
the sapatendo—the clog dance—and their 
sinuous samba and rumba. 

The air was felicitously burdened 
with oven-hot sunshine, oily foods, to. 


bacco, vaporous red dust, rum, colas and 
perspiration, Under the thatched dome 
of an open: ed structure were held 
cocklights. The benches 
ound the arena were jammed, The ar 
э рату beautiful burnished. 
spurred bantams strutted warily in 
deathly ballet and then lightuinglike 
flew into cach other. pecking. gouging. 
slashing and sanering their blood and 
feathers. The bettors cried encourage: 
ment with pleas and curses до their 
cocks. The cockm plored their 
champions 10 blind and kill the adver 
ату, spoke to them in poctically endear- 
ing terms, picked them up lovingly, 
licked the blood from them, massaged 


raised 


razor 


sters 


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PLAYBO!Y 


196 


them, kissed them and blew stimu 
r up their behinds. 
Night saw the procession of the cande- 
laria. Behind the vestmenied. priest, sol- 
dicis, police and the gaudy ethgy of the 
Virgin Mary, the mass carried candles. 
Outside а hovel at the end of town, 
cow was dying. Someone said (he cow 
1 anthrax. The cow was desperately 


ring 


trying to raise its head into the moon 
light. The owner and his wile were 
wringing their hands. ‘The priest 


procession formed about the stricken an 
imal, knelt and. prayed. for its comfort. 


Realizing that the cow was in its last 
throes, many set up lame s. keen 
ag as to its life-sustaining value and the 


catastrophic loss t0 the penniless family. 
A policeman wept also. 

Following the sanctifying of the candles 
and the observances paid to the Virgin 
Many, the mayor kuded the govern 
ment and requested all to bow. their 
heads and. pray thanksgiving t0 General 
Barista. Blessings by the priest and ап 
indifferent fireworks display concluded 
the festivities for the purification of the 
Virgin. Many. 

The crowds were about to depart. In 
the distance sounded the ominous steam 
whistle of the presidio. It blew incessant 
ly. There had been an escape. The sol 
s and police drew their guns with 
< and ordered the people to 
tin. There was fright on the faces of 
the peons The plantation dons moved 


about with authority 
Own posse. 

Armored vehicles sped into town with 
bells clanging s wailing. Fol 
lowing them were pickup trucks bring- 
ng bloodhounds. The peons were 
rounded told to throw thei 


d organized their 


id sil 


up, 


machetes into a heap and submit to the 
y of presidio officials and guards. 
Four political prisoners. had. escaped. 

The commandant asked me to usc 
Vito's station wagon to transport soldiers 
for the hunt. He told me, “The bastards 
took advantage of the candelaria to es 
cape. They've been gone for hours. T 
hope we don't find them too quickly—it 
will spoil the excitement of the chase. 

As E went for the station wagon, I s: 
the priest speaking gravely to the com- 
t The commandant shook his 
mphatically. The priest looked 
ad and choking. 1 guessed that the 
priest was begging mercy for the prison- 
ers or did not wish the prisoners, when 
ht. to meet death without Christian 
1 preparation 

The many hunters fanned out toward 
Santa Barbara, Santa Fe and the center 
of the island reaching 10 the low moun- 
ıs of La Cañada. Reluctantly, I drove 
overfed soldiers with the central contin- 
gent heading for the range of La Caña- 
da. Between the stops and searches at 
plantations, the soldiers carried on as if 
on carnival outing, smoking big 
and drinking wildly. The terrorized 
peons were offensively interrogated and 
manhandled. 

Ar dawn the bloodhounds scented out 
the prisoners in a haystack of a u 
farm on a slope of La Cañada 
had not been there. 1 had been praying 
far the prisoners not to be found. The 
prisoners, young peons, one white and 
three black, were herded at gunpoint 
into the open field, riddled with hun- 
dreds of bullets, spat upon. urinated 
upon and their bodies hacked to bits 
with machetes. 

The peon tena 


m 


" 


її farmer was accused 


“I assume you re next, Miss Blake.” 


of harboring the fugitives, He screamed 
that he did not even know the prisoners 
had hidden in his haystack. The soldiers 
threw him upon the butchered corpses 


and shot him to death. His wife and 
daughters were dragged out of the [arm- 
house and raped by the soldiers, Back in 


Nueva Gerona, the drink maddened sol 
diers went on a rampage. 

As 1 packed my bags at Casa del Rio, 
Liz looked softly at me and said thar she 
was pregnant. Would I think of her once 
in a while? I would. And dearly 
Johannes drove me to Nueva Gerona. 
1 thanked him for the good спе he had 
taken of me 
The best is none too good for Mr. 
оъ guest,” he answered. 

On poles and buildings, the police 
were tacking up posters with the death 
gn of skull and crosbones. warning of 

new rabies outbr 

1 boarded the steamer for Bataband. 
My soul welled with murder. I saw my- 
self with a machine gun filed with 
never-ending bullets shooting down Vito, 
the rich Cubans, Batista and his soldi 
and police and, like a Jesus, mi 
ly bringing back to life ıl 
ers and the tenant farme 

In Havana, I sat with Hemingway 
n at the Ambos Mundos bar. The 
опе. We 
g could not 
make me drunk. I told him about the 
escaped prisoners. the tenant farmer and 
felt. 1 sa the name of 
Christ, how can you bear to live in Cub; 
sind not write and protest about the god- 
mn things thar take place here 
Hemingway answered, “I can't count 
he people Гус seen killed for an ideal, 
Kid, you've never been in a war. You get 
used то such things. It happens from 
generation (0 generation, like 
spring. another harvest. Man is 


how I EI 


another 
1 moth- 


cring son of a bitch. The world could be 
a paradise, but the people hate God and 
themselves. The peons you saw shot yes- 


terday would be on the other end of the 
rifle tomorrow. When the revolution 
comes here, then it will be turnabour 
id some other unfortunate хору day 
п the barrel. You are green, You let sex. 
religion and social conditions ov 
whelm you. You're not a bad kid. You'll 
See it my way someday. We're all born to 
die. What's the diference if it comes. 
sooner or later? АП man's troubles come 
from his two heads. Perhaps the noblest 
thing a man can do is to cut off his lower 
head a blow his goddamn brains out. 
Now this advice will cost you a drink!" 

I did not bother to look up my other 
in Havan With revulsion 
and impatience to get away from that 
d, T overcame my fear of flying and 
got on a plane for Miami. Aside from 
of wondrous Liz, the sen- 
ts of the tropic of Cuba had 
turned to acrid blood in my mouth, 


WOMAN FOR TITUS 
(continued from page 102) 


every time he tried to touch her. By that 
Thursday, when the attic door was still 
locked, I decided to do somethin 
it. At first I thought a good. whipping 
would do the wick, but it occurred to me 
it would be a shame to spoil her skin. It 
was much casier to just have the lock 
taken off and wait outside on the stairs 
every night until they were in bed 

Poor Titus. You could hear them 
wrestling from the front hall; great 
thumping and rolling on the floor. She's 
as strong as the devil, Those beautiful 
tecth almost tore off one of Titus’ cars, 
and one night she almost knocked hi 
unconscious with a blow 10 the stomach 
that left him gasping Гог breath. But he 
was as strong as a horse himself, and I 
knew it was only a question of time be- 
fore he'd break her in. Aunt Henny 
agreed. 

"IUH be a boy, master 
“A boy, you'll see. 

When things finally quieted down, the 
servants laughed. more than. ever—but 
now because Titus would drag her off to 
bed right after supper and so s, if 
I didn't need him, in the middle of the 
fternoon. She bit and scratched, but off 
they went. Yet something was the mat- 
ter. I had never seen him more moros 
He would hurry through his chores to 
take her upstairs, but without so much 
as a grin. In the morn 
our my clothes, it 
No, sir" in response to my questions, 
d that was all. Whatever was cating 
him had turned his ski 
swear it—a light brownish green that 
ade him look as if he was being slowly 
poisoned. I thought that was actually the 
case, but Aunt Henny said no. 

"s the matter?" I asked. 

She shrugged. 

The only time Titus seemed his old 
self was on Sunday mornings, when we 
Jl gathered in the parlor lor the services 
that I had continued after Momma's 
death, according to her wishes. Fd read a 
pter of the Bible aloud and then, like 
old times, Titus would throw back his 
head and lead us all in hymns, Nonny 
Iways lingered in the doorway, glaring 
at the ser 

"She's got the evil cy 
told m 
Nonsense. 

No, master, you look at he 
о be honest, 1 always thought her 
eyes were particularly. beautiful; d: 
brown, with litle flecks of yellow in 
them, Mill had trained her never to look. 
white man in the face, but when she 
d at the servants, they absolutely 
iled. She wied it on Titus, too, 
he was listening to me read, or 
singing. he never noticed. He fixed his 
gaze on Momma's old Bible, with the si 
ver cross on the cover, that was kept on 


" she cackled. 


Aunt Henny 


“All right, you guys, let's get organized!” 


the table near the so! he cross seemed. 


to fascinate him. After. services, he in 
variably threw himself down on h 
knees and kissed it, muttering under hi 


breath 
les praying," Nonny laughed, 
Aunt Henny now tells me he'd sneak 
into the parlor and do it on the sly once 
or twice a day during the week. It 
always the same way. on his knees i 
front of the Bible, with his eyes shut 
ing so hard the 
his forchea 
always kissed 


tight, and concentr 
sweat would pop out on 
And when he finished, he 
the cross. 

“ILL could only read." he confessed to 
her, opening the Book. 

“What for?” 
“lus the Word of God. He could tell 
me what to do if I could only read what 

He says.” 

“Do about what?" Aunt Henny asked 
him, but he refused. to answer. 

If I had known what was really on his 
nd. I would have sold him off ıo the 
aders. But, as I've written, the 
ime out of the blue. It's only 
now that it comes back to me with such 
peculiar vividness, It was a Tuesday aft- 
Thad just come home from рау. 
all on some neighbors—the Fields, 
do you remember them?-—whose oldest 
child was down with seirler fever. Care 
line answered the door, and as T took 
off my hat and cloak, Titus stepped up 
behind me. dressed in his blue velvet 
buder's jacket with the brass buttons 
that Thad bought him last Christmas. 

My walking stick, luckily. ' my 
le nd. He took my cl id pur it 
in the closet, and suddenly, with a lite 
moan, sprang at my throat. 

My reaction was instinctive. I slashed 
r his face with all the strength 1 had 
nd then again, across the shoulder: 
when the blow knocked him down. Caro- 


n 
Georgia 
attack 


and Nonny and Aunt 
from the kitchen, where 
they had been having lunch. Actually, it 
was all over in an instant. The crack 
across the bridge of his nose had 
knocked him senseless. By the time hi 
ame to, my coachman and stableboy 
had tied him up to the hitching post in 
the yard. 

The blood was still seaming down 
face, but as soon as he realized I was 
over him, he tried to speak. It 
seems to me now that the wild look that 
psed in his eyes a few mo- 
mis before was gone and that he had 
fully recovered his sanity. But irs hard 


line screamed, 


to say, He licked his lips and grimaced 
h pain 
"Why, Titu Т asked him. "Why did 
you do i 


Nonny,” he whispered. 

“What's the maner with 
ought to be proud. She cost m 
hundred. dollars. 


her? You 
twelve 


They took away her 
n. She didn't want no morc, but I 
forced her. I'm a Christian, but 1 forced 
her. You made me force her, and I liked 
it. God help me. I liked it. do you hear? 

He shut his eyes. In a half hour or so, 
by the time the bleeding stopped. Sheriff 
Benson and two deputies came and took 
him away. It was the only explanation 
he ever gave me. “I liked it.” And why 
not? She's put on some weight and 
prettier than ever. "I liked it,” he told 
me. To tell you the uuth, it's got me 
completely stumped. 

But ies almost eight o'clock, and I 
must get dressed for dinner. Do write, 
and send my very best io Canter, 
Charles, Linda and Paul 

Your affectione cousin, 


George 
E 


197 


PLAYBOY 


198 pany me? After all, w 


FIRST AID FOR FREDDIE 


figure lissome and slender. She looks like 
something out of a beauty chorus, and as 
you are probably aware, the little wom- 
an rarely approves of her mate being on 
chummy terms with someone of that di 
scription. Let Aggie get one glimpse of 
Valerie Fanshawe and learn that Freddie 
hay been showering dogs on her, and 
she'll probably divorce him. 

Surely ши?" 

“Irs in the cards, American wives get 
orces at the drop of a hat.” 

"Bless my soul. What would Frederick 
do then? 

“Well, her father obviously wouldn't 
want him working at his dog biscuit em- 
porium. | suppose he would come and 
live here. 

“What, at Ше castle?" cried Lord Ems- 
worth, appalled. "Good God! 

“So you see how serious the situation 
is. However, I've been giving it intense 
thought, turning here a stone, exploring 
there an avenue, and 1 am glad to say I 
have found the solution. We must get 
that dog back before Aggic arrives.” 

“You will ask Valerie Fanshawe to re- 
turn it?” 


di 


“Nor quite that. She would never let 
it go. IL 


v to be pinched, and 
е you come in.” 


se is there? Freddie and E arc 
both lying on beds of pain, unable to 
move, and we can hardly ask Connie to 
oblige. You arc our only mobile force. 
Your quick intelligence has probably al- 
ready told you what you have ro do. 
What do people do when they've got a 
? They instruct the butler to let it 
out for a run last thing at nigh 

"Do they?" 


go their carpets. 
Every dog has its last-thingatnight out 
wb I think we can safely assume 
it will be via the back door.” 


What the back door?” 
Aia 
“Oh, via? Yes, yes, quite.” 
ò you must pop over to the 
Vanshawes'—say around ten o'dock—and 


lurk outside their back door till the ani- 
mal appears, and bring it back he 
Lord Emsworth stared, aghast. 
“But, Galahad! 
"Us no good say 
Irs got to be done. You don't want Fred- 
dies whole fuwre to turn blue ar the 
edges and go down the d do you? 
Let alone having him at the case for 
the rest of his life, Ah, 1 sec you shud- 
der. | thought you would. And, € 
its not much Um asking of yo 
to go and stand in а back s; 
scoop in a dog. A child could do it. Tf it 
wasn't that we want to keep the thing a 
secret just between ourselves. ГА hand 
the job over to the brownie.” 
^ But what if the dog refuses to accom 
ve scarcely me 


(continued from page H8) 


“Tve thought of that. You must sprin- 
kle your trouser legs with aniseed. Dogs 
follow aniseed to the ends of the cardi." 

“But P have no aniseed.” 

“Beach is bound to be able to lay his 
hands on some. And Beach never asks 
questions. Unlike Connie's young, smart 
butler, who would probably bc full of 
them. Oh, Beach," said Gally, who had 
pressed the bell. “Have we aniseed in 
the house?” 

“Yes, Mr. Galahad. 

"Bring me a stoup of it, will you? 

“Very good, sir,” said Beach. 

If the request surprised him, he did 
not show it. Your experienced butler 
never allows himself to look surprised at 
ything. He brought the aniseed. At 
the appointed hour Lord Emsworth 
drove ofi in Freddie's sports car, smelling, 
to heaven. And Gally, left alone, lit an- 
other cigar and turned his attention to 
the Times aosword puzzle. 

He found it, however, dihicult to con- 
centrate. This was not merely because 
these crossword puzzles had become so 
abstruse nowadays and he was basically a 
Sun-god-Ra and Large-Australian-bird— 
emu man, Having seen Lord Emsworth 
off on his journey, doubts and fears were 
ing him. He was wishing he could 
feel more confident of his brother 
chances of success in the mission th 
had been entrusted to him. A lifen 
association with him had left him feeling 
that the head of the family was a fr 
yeed on which to lean in gency 
If there was any possible way of bun- 
gling the enterprise, he would. he knew, 
infallibly bungle it. F us for doing 
the wrong thing was a byword in his cir- 
de of acquaintance. 

Which, he king himself, of the 
many ways open to him for messing 
everything up would Lord E 
lect? Drive the car into a ditch? С 
the wrong house? Or would he forget all 
about his assignment and sit by the road- 
side musing on pigs? It was impossible to 
say, and Gally's emotions were similar to 
those of a general who. having planned 
а brilliant piece of strategy, finds himself 
dubious 
сапу й ou 
aces chew th 


assa 


was 


s to the abi 


hes 


ма 


1 an over- 
wiought sort of way 
have chewed his, if he had had one 
Heavy breathing sounded outside the 
door. Beach entered. 
“Miss Fanshaw 


and Gally would 


he announced. 
new with V 
we was only a slight one, and i 
interval since they had lase nw 
forgotten some of her fine 
Secing her now, he realized how accu 
rate had been his desaiption of her to 
Lord Emsworth. In the best and deepest 
sense of the words, she was a dish and a 
pippin—in short, ihi 


points. 


very last type of 


nd should 


girl to whom a young hust 
have given his wife's. Alsatian 

"Good evening," he said. "You must 
forgive me for nor rising as directed 
the books of etiquette. I've spr 
ankle. 

Oh, Im sorry. 
Tm not disturbing vou. 
Not at all." 

“L asked for Mr. Threepwood, forg 
ting there were two of you. I came to set 
Freddie.” 

"He's gone to bed. He has spra 
his ankle." 

The girl seemed puzzled. 

“Aren't you getting mixed up?" she 
said. "It was you who sprained the ankh 

reddie also." 
What, both of you? What happened? 
We fell downstairs togethei 

“What m; 

“Oh, we thought we would. C 

Freddie a message?" 
“И you wouldn't mind. Tell him that 
| is well. Did he mention to you that 
he was uying to sell Father those dog 
biscuits of. his?” 

"He did 

“Well, 1 approached Father on the 
ject amd he said, Oh, all right, he 
would give them a try. He said he didn't 
suppose they would actually poison th 
dumb chums, and as 1 was making such 
a point of it he'd take a chance. 

"Splendid." 

“And I've brought back the dog.” 

It was only the most sensational. piece 
of news that could make Gally's monocle 
drop from his eye. At these words ir fell 
ke a shooting star 
“You've done what?” he exclaimed, т 
trieving the monocle and replacing it in 
order the bener то goggle at her 

“Не gave me an Alsatian dog this aft- 
ernoon, and Гуе brought it back." 

“You mean 

“Twa 
The fathead's first act on docking i 
to make a beeline for Father's spa 
and try to as it, the one thing 
calculated ло get himself socially омга 


icd 


ssi 


€ized. Father thinks the world of that 
el. "Who let thi 


canine paranoi 
into the house? he thundered. fomir 
at the mouth. Í said 1 had. Where did 
you get the foul creature?’ he demanded. 
"Freddie gave him to me; 1 said. “Then 
you cin damn well e him back to this 
he is! he" 


sp: 


Freddie, whoever 
"Vocilcrated 
“Yes. yociferated. “And let 

said, "that I am about to get my gun and 

count ten, and if the still 
round when 1 reach that figure. 1 shall 
blow his head off at the roots, and the 

Lord have mercy on his soul, if any.’ 

Well. Fm. pretty quick and. 1 saw right 

that what he was hin al was 

he preferred not 10 associate with 

the dog, so Pye brought him back. I 

think he went off to the servants’ hall to 

have a bite of supper. 1 shall miss him, 


ne add, he 


"It isn't much of a dragon, but then, 


she wasn't much of a maiden.” 


199 


00 PRODE 207000 IN BOW) » BOTH 


PLAYBOT 


In every glass of LW. Harper 


...à great tradition! 


1510 WICKER "OH 


I.W. HARPER 


THE GOLD MEDAL KENTUCKY BOURBON 


of course. Sul, 
And so saying, nshawe, re- 
verting to the subject of Gally's ankle, ex- 
pressed a hope that he would not have 
to have it amputated, and withdrew. 
17 at this moment somebody had sta 
ed to ampu hardly 
probable that he would have noticed it, 
50 centered were his thoughts on this as 
tounding piece of good luck that had be- 
fallen a nephew of whom he had always 
been fond. If. as he supposed, it was the 
laters guardian angel who had engi 
necred the happy ending like а conjurer 
pulling a rabbit out of a hat, he would 
have liked to slap him on the back and 
tell him how greatly his efforts were ap- 
prec Joy cometh in the morning, 
he told himself, putting the clock for- 
ward a little, and by way of celebrating 
the oc he vang Beach and 
ked for a whiskey and sod. 
It was some considerable time before 
the order was filled, and Beach was full 
pologies for his tardiness. 
must express my regret for being so 
long, Mr. € . Í was detained on 
the telephone by Colonel Fanshawe 
“The Fanshawe family seems very 
much with us tonight. Is there a Mrs. 
Fanshawe? 
"I understand so, Mr. Galahad.” 
"No doubt she will be dropping in 
shortly. What did the colonel want?" 
“He w: for his lordship, but 1 
have been ble to locate him.” 
gone for a stroll.” 
"Indeed? D was not aware. Colonel 
asha 
ling Hall tomorrow morning in his ca- 
pacity of justice of the peace. It appears 
that the butler at Marling Hall appre- 
hended a prowler who was lurking in 
the vicinity of the back door and has 
locked him Colonel Fan- 
shawe is hoping that his lordship will 
give him a sharp sentence. 
For the second time that n 


. easy go.’ 


asion for 


we wished him to come to M. 


п the cellar, 


monocle had fallen from the parent eye 
He 


socket. He had not, as we have 
ard to the poss 
bility of his brother's getting through 


the evening without mishap, but he h 


seen 


not foreseen anything 1 

outstanding, even for Clarence. 
“Beach,” he said, "this opens up a 

new line of thought. You speak of a 


prowler,” 
Mes enn 
“Who was lu 
back door and 
cella 
“Yes, 
Well, here's something for your files. 
The prowler you have in mind was 
е other than Clarence, ninth Earl of 
isworrh." 


ng at the Fanshawe 
now in the Fanshawe 


T sent him w M 
mission, the 


“I assure you, 
lon 


à secre! re of 


which I am not 
and how he m 
shall 
and is now 


mpowered. to disclose, 
naged to get copped we 
ver know. Suffice it that he did 
the cel ne cellar or 


Coal, 1 was given to understand, sir.” 
Dur task, then, is to get him out of 
Don't speak. Í must thi 

When an ordinary man is trying to 
formulate a scheme for extricating. his 
brother from a coal cellar, the procedure 
pt to be a lengthy onc involving the 
d and 
dear finger; but in the case of a 
man like Gally not so. Only a 
minimum of time | psed before he 
was able to announce that he had got it 

"Beach!" 

“Sin 

"Go to my bedroom, look in the draw- 
r where the handkerchi па you 
will find a small borde comaining white 
tablets. Bring it to me." 

“Would this be the bottle to which 
you refer, sir?” asked Beach, returning a 
few minutes late 

“That's the опе. Now 
facts, Is the butler at the 
pal of yours?” 

“We are acquainted, sir. 

"Then he won't be surprised if you 
suddenly pay him a call 

I imagine not, Mr. Galahad, I some- 
times do when I find myself in the 
neighborhood of Marling Hall 

“And on these occasions he sets them 


an 


few nec 
anshawes' a 


up? 

"Sir?" 

"You drain a cup or two?" 

"Oh yes sir. I am always offered 
refreshment.” 

“Then the thing’s in the bag. You see 
this bottle, Beach? It coni are 


known as mickey finns. The name is fa- 
miliar to you 
Kk dr 
They are a recognized sedative in the 


United States. When I lı at to New 
York, a great h bartender 
on Eighth Avenue, happened to speak of 
them and was shocked to learn that I 
їп my possession. They were 
things, he said, that nobody should be 
without. He gave me a few, assuring me 
that sooner or later they were bound 10 
come in useful. Hitherto 1 have had no 
occasion 10 make use of them, but 1 
think you will agree that now is the time 
Jor them to come to the aid of the party 
You follow me, Beach?" 

"No, sir.” 
оте, come. You know my methods, 
apply them. Slip oi 10 this 
Dutler’s drink, and almost immediately 
you will sce him fold up like a tired lily 
Your path thus made straight, you pro- 
ceed 10 the cellar, unleash his lordship 
him home.” 
“But, Mi 
“Now wha 
“L hardly like 


had non 


e of these 


“Don't stand there making frivolous 
objections. If Clarence is not extracted 
from that cellar before tomorrow morn 
ig, his name will be mud. He will be- 
come a hissing and a byword.” 

“Yes, sir, but” 

“And don't overlook another aspect of 
the matter. Perform this simple task, and 
there will be no limit to his gratitude 
Purses of gold will change hands. Camels 
bearing apes, ivory and р 1 ad- 
dressed (0 you, will shortly be calling 
и the back door of Blandings Castle. 
You will clean up to an unimaginable 
extent. 

It was а pow 
chins, which 
pily, ceased to waggle. A tight of resolu 
tion came into his eyes. He looked 
butler who stiffened the sincws and. 


summoned up the blood, as recom- 
mended by Henry the Fifth 
"Very good, Mr. Galahad," he said. 


Gally resumed his cr 
more than ever convinced that the com- 
piler of ihe clues was suffering from sof- 
of the brain. and in duc course 
heavy breathing woke him from the 
light doze into which he had fallen 
while endeavoring to read sense into “ 


ssword puzzle, 


one who has recently passed through 
some great spiritual 
“Wel 1 Gally. 
Everything nice 
"Yes, Mr. Galahad.” 
“You administered the medium dose 
for an adult 
“Yes, Mr. 
“And released his lordship?” 
“Yes, Mr. Galahad, 
‘That's my boy. Where is he?” 
Taking a bath, Mr. G, 
somewhat begrimed. Would 
anything further, sir 
"Not a thing. You can go to bed 
sleep peacefully. Good night." 
"Good night, s 
Tt was some minutes later, while C 
was wrestling with "I2 down," that he 
found his privacy invaded by another 
caller with whom he had not expected to 
hobnob, It was seldom that 
Constance sought his society. Except for 


Galahad. 


be 


is sist 


shivering austerely whenever she saw 
him, she rarely had much to do with hi 
"Oh. hulle, Connie,” hc said. “Are 


you any good at crossword puzzles?" 
dy Constance did not say “To hell 
with crossword puzzles," but it was plain 
that only her breeding restrained her 
from doing so. She was in one of those 
оо of imperious wrath that so often 
ad reduced Lord Emsworth to an apol 
ogetic jelly. 


“Galahad,” she said, “have you seen 
Beach?” 
“Just been chatting with him. Why? 


201 


202 


m for half 
an hour. He really is quite past his 
duties." 

"Clarence was telling me that that w 
how you felt about him. He said you 
were thinking of firing him." 

“I ат. 

7] shouldn't 

“What do you mea 

“You'll rue the day 

* don't understand. you." 

“Then let me tell you a little bedtime 


ase do not drivel, Galahad. Real- 
› mes think that you hase less 
sense than Clarence.” 

“It а story,” Gally proceeded, ignor 
‘of a feudal devotion to th 
sts that would be hard to 
overpraise. Ir shows Beach in so favor- 
ight that 1 think you will agree 
that when you speak of giving him the 
heave ho you are talking, if you will for- 
give me saying so, through the back of 
your neck 

“Have you been drinking, Galahad?" 

“Only а series of coasts to a butler 


able a 


who will go down in legend and song. 
Here comes the story.” 

He told it well, omitting no dei 
however slight, and as his narrative un 
folded, an ashen pallor spread over Lady 
Constance's face and she began to gulp 
з a manner that would have interested 
ny doctor specializing in ailments of 
the thoracic cavity. 

“So there you are, 
dluding. "Even if you are 
his selfless service and lost in admira 
of his skill i key finns 
people's drinks, you must realize that it 
would be madness to hand him the pi 
slip. You can't afford (o have him 
spreading the tale of Clarencc's activities 
all over the county, and you know as 
well as I do that, il sacked, he will dine 
out on the thing for months. If I were 
you. Connie, I would recor s 

He eyed with satisfaction the wreck of 
what had once been a fine upstanding 
sister. He could read the message of 
those gulps. He could see that she was 


reconsidering. 


il 


no 


“My diagnoses are seldom wrong, Miss Fern — 
and it’s my opinion thal you are either pregnant 
or have swallowed some large object.” 


untitled 
(continued from page 109) 


began to pop up out of his own brain. 
in a pink corner labeled, he noticed, 
HATS and the first one was, “He couldn't 
generate enough brain power to warm 
a hatband." Who wrote that? Alan 
Hynd. He was going to remember the 
tide of the article, the date of the 
magazine, and the picture on the cover, 
but he shut olf the whole process, and 
just in time, too. Once started, he'd 
go through everything in mats and it 
could take a long time. That was the 
center hell around which he spun, all 
is days, a memory, no, he couldn't call 
it that, а good word for a bad thing: he 
thought of his memory as, mon- 
г computer, а really big one. a room- 
ful, a gimmick w about 20,000,000. 
miles of wire in it and a trainload 
of transistors, a big chromium box the 
size of a house, covered with gray-brown 


mouse h gly individual pelts, 
small. like the steel plates with which 
the Indians used to armor their war ele- 


phams. He had not asked for that kind 
of memory, or worked to get it, or any 
thing of the sort. He could remember all 
nds of useful facts: January 20, 1951 
was the coldest day recorded in Mon- 
tana, 70 degrees below zero F., and Hen- 
vy I died in 1135. and a blimp is a blimp 
because it used 10 be a B-type Limp Air- 
craft, and. belore Š O S radio operators 
used to send C Q D, and on and on and 
on. he could give you stuff 1 
after hour, and once in a while he could 
amuse himself. 


€ that hour 


or someone else, but un- 
happily it was a package deal, and he 
could remember just as well the amber 
scent of a girl named Margaret Biere, 
the one and true love of his life when he 
was 13, and every five years or so he 
would pick it up on someone, maybe on 
the sireci, and it would turn his heart 
over and slam him against a lamppo: 
He could remember every word of a con- 
vers d a half in which 
he had, helplessly, and watching himself 
do it nd blown up 
ground to dirt his friendship with his 
father, a nice enough man who hap- 
pened 10 be worth something over 
52.000.000 when he died, and who made, 
as a result, a capricious distribution of it 
mong strangers. charlatans. and 
lickspittles. He knew the exact taste of 
an omelette aux champignons he'd had 
n the Hotel de Marcier in Nemours on 
the 17th of May, 1949, although ever 
since he had been careful not 
mushrooms in any fe 1 the f 
the raste of that omelet 
the girl who 
te half of 
appear. He knew it would neve 
fat Dalmatian dog loped a 
ng crookedly 


on of an hour 


destroyed nd 


t. would volatilize 


happen 
s the 
nd sidewise, 
rters were getting orders 


trom somewhere else, Tall in orange, a 
black leash dragging from her wrist, 
through the bushes and under the 
arching trees, a girl, about a foot high 


that distance, and he thought. if I could 
мор her just there I would take her 
home and put her under a bell jar. The 
thing would have a rosewood base, with 
а round groove where the glass fitted, 
and green felt on the bottom, Га have 
the dog. too. he'd be lean. though, and 
nding straight, He tried to stop her, 
so that he would work out the picture 
fully. but it was mo good. she kept 
coming, а tall, legg а stupid face 
with a nose like a bent shovel, but pret 
ty: she came straight, that being the way 
the path lay. and growing as She came 
until she was, just before he shur h 


eyes, 92 feet tall or something near it: he 
was staring at her shins just above (he 
ankle. he could see the mesh of her 


stockings, about an inch square between 
threads, and. the silver-yellow short hairs 
on her legs. as big around as say 
clothesline, and when he kuew she was 
ing t0 мер on him. the round wet file 
in his head [licked over and he read that 
the ordinary spike heel, slammed down 
by а woman weighing 105. delivers 

pressure of just over 2500 pounds per 
square inch, or more weight than à trac 
for purs on the ground. He waited for 
the crunch that didn't come and opened 
his eyes то watch her pass she h 


really lovely ass and as she passed she di 
minished, according 10 the true. laws of 
perspective. down 10 two and a half 
times the size of the dog, galloping gimp- 
ily ahead of her, а stick in his mouth so 
g that one end dragged foolishly on 
the ground. an idiot dog. lost in а world 
with no more Guriages for him (o run 
uler, He watched the girl out of sight 
around the turning in the path, He 
buttocks, winking like a heliograph 
across 50 miles of desert, went last 


A thin gil came, and as she passed. 
One noted that she was golden-avsed: 
How odd a whim of mighty God's 
To caw gluteals in gilded pods. 


He stuffed it into a crack under л rox 
ass, reading it once as it went. Water fell 
on him. Si in the rain, or go? Не 
retched lightly under the idea that there 
would be a place to go, if he knew whe 

was. I had beter get back, he thought. 
and he tried, he tried hard. but the gears 
spun soundlesly without meshing. He 
was very frightened. He walked to the 
fence and took a big piece of it in e; 


hand and sta по the streer, ти 
now with rain. I1 told him nothing. He 
heard the girl coming back. her fect 


sculling lightly on the gravel, He turned. 
TIL have another look at that as it goes 
by, he thought, and then lll sit down 
and TI work, and PIL get back. She 
stopped beside him. Her dog stopped. 
too, looking up over his stick. The dog 
was crosscyed. 


zem 
PRE-INDUECTI 
PHYSICAL <== 


ON 


“Beat it!!” 


“Well. love.” she said, "vou got my lit- 
Ale message. I hear! 

Messi р 

“Read it again when you go home," 
- You ought to 
1 it fifteen times. you bastard!" She 
snapped the leash on the dog, jerked the 
sick through his teeth and tossed it over 
the fence. She went toward the gate. fas 

Hang on.” he said. “I'm coming with 
vou. 

“You are wot,” she said. She was out- 
side now. she stuffed the dog into a blue 
cav. dropped herself in after him and 
had it moving five seconds later. He 
couldn't even see which wav she turned 
t ihe corner. there were bushes in the 


looking into the street, 
pluckin: tly at his shirt, half wer 
through. Tremors ran up and down his 
arms, and not from cold. He lifted the 
top of his head a crack and saw a moist 
chaos. He looked at the shoes he 
wore, the slacks, which were none of his 
that he knew. He felt in the pockets. It 
was a thin inventory: a handkerchief, a 
box of Swedish matches, a pewter c 
rette case, empty. There was a square of 
typing pasted to the inner lid of the 


Case. à name and an address. Dr. John 
Oliver. Well. All right. He would go 
round and see Dr. Ol 
was, and after a while he'd. say, "You 
know. doctor. a funny thing happened 
to me on the way to your office: I forgot 


who I was. or who I am. if 1 

He went through the gate and 
stopped a man 

"Pardonnez-meot, m'sicu'," be sai. 


"Pousvezseous m'indiquer le chemin pour 
сене adresse?" 
The man looked ino Pleasant 


ne, white 


looking old m 
h. 


‚ сптуйщ a c 


French, I'm sory 
har all? 


“1 don't spe 
said. "Do you spea 


"Yes. Yes, of course.” 
“Well, now id. "Dr. 
Oliver. Is that st 87th See 


"Right. I just don't know which way 
10 go from here, vou see 
"Bun my dear man, surely th 
New York address, 129 East 87th Street? 
And surely we're in Dublin? 
He let the old boy go and. went back 
into the park and sat down in the r 
back. 


203 


PLAYBOY 


204 


"THE 
prompts of a Lite-supper 


siot . 
Before the theater, we like cocktails 


drink ses- 


on the rocks. They make long drinks of 
short ones. We favor aperitif cocktails 
such as the negroni, vermouth cassis or 


white sis When you return to 
your apartment after the theater, throw 
open the full resources of your bar. And 
for the final program note. what could 
possibly be better than a way of Liqueurs 


such as Chartreuse, benedictine or Grand 
Marnier poured over rocks or finely 
shaved 


been 


The follow have 
through tryouts and are ready for your 
theater dining repertory 


CHEESE SOUP, ROQUEFORT CROUTONS 
(Serves six) 

3 Spanish onions 

3 tablespoons butter 

2 tablespoons olive oil 

З pints chicken broth, fresh or canned 

| cup light cream. 

| cup mik 

1? ozs. processed gruyère cheese 

14 teaspoon Worcestershire sauce 

? ољ. brandy 

Salt. pepper. cayenne pepper 

12 slices narrow French br 

6 ozs. roquefort cheese 


cad 


Peel onions, cut in half through stem 
end, then cut crosswise into thinnest pos- 
sible slices. Heat butter and ой in soup 
pot until butter melts, Add onions and 
siuté slowly, stirring frequently, until 
onions are limp and turning yellow, not 
brown. Add chicken bring to 
a boil; reduce Пате and simmer slowly 
20 minutes. Add cream and milk: bring 
up to boiling point but do mot boil. 
Put gruyere cheese through Large holes 


moth 


of square metal grater. Remove soup 
from llame. Add Worcestershire sauce, 
brandy and gruyère cheese; stir unt 


cheese dissolves. Add salt and peppe 
10 taste and a generous dash of cayenne 
pepper. Toast bread lightly under 
broiler Mame. Spread one side with 
roquefort cheese and sprinkle with 
paprika. Place bread, cheese side up, 
under broiler flame unul cheese begins 
to brown. Reheat soup just before 
serving and spoon imo turcen or ir 
dividual soup marmites, Place 2 slices 
roquelort toast on cach portion. Serve 
n accompanying course ol oysters or 
ms on the half shell. 


DANISH HAM, CHICKEN. AND ASPARAGUS 
SANDWICHES 
(Serves six) 
4 boiled breasts of chicken, cooled 
2 ол. sliced Danish ham 
6 large center slices round pumper- 
nickel bread 


È (continued from page H7) 


M lb. sweet butter, at room tempera- 
ture 
2 10-07. pkgs. frozen asparagus, cooked, 
drained and cooled 
3⁄4 сир mayonnaise 
1 tablespoon Dijon mustard 
1⁄4 teaspoon dry English mustard 
1 tablespoon white-wine vineg: 
1 tablespoon heavy sweet cream 
Remove skin and. bones from chicken 
and, with verv sharp knile, cut. chicken 
posible slices. Spread 
Dread with butter, Place chicken slices 
on bread. Place him slices on chicken, 


into thinnest 


letting them overlap crust. " 
parigus spears in center of In 
small mixing bowl combine mayor 

Dijon mustard, English mustard, 


vinegar and cream, Mix until smooth. 
Spoon mayonnaise mixture over aspar- 
agus. Serve sandwiches, ice cold, on large 


latter or individual plates. 


HKIMES VINAIGKETTE 


(Sen 


s six) 


2 Ibs. (cooked weight) shrimps, b. 

peeled and deveined 
1 cup olive oil 
, pepper 
yf cup white-wine vineg 
1⁄4 cup dry white wine 
n pepper, small dice 
ned pimientos, small dice 
pieces celery. peeled, small dice 
iced. parsley 

1 tablespoon minced chives or ма 

lions 

14 teaspoon thym 

G mediumsize firm, 

Boston lettuce 

2 hard-boiled eggs, small dice 

Combine shrimps п mixing 
bowl. Sprinkle generously with salt and 
pepper and toss well. Add vinegar, wine, 
green pepper, pimientos, celery, parsley, 
chives and thyme and toss well. Mari- 
Irigerator 6 10 8 hours, or over- 
night if possible. Lower tomatoes into 
large pot of rapidly boiling water for 20 
to 25 seconds. Peel tomatoes under cold 
water; remove stem ends; then 
cut each tomato through top (but do not 
te) into G wedges. On 6 serving 
plans, place sev 
Spread out tomato wedges fanwise, with- 

ting segments. and sprinkle 

generously with salt. Add egg to shr 
d toss thoroughly. Spoon shrimps with 
y onto tomatoes. Serve ice cold. 
Pass bread-and butter 
of thinly sliced French br 
spread with sweet butter. 


1o e N е 


leaves 


pe tomatoes 


nd oil 


тиш 


sepai 


| leaves of lettuce. 


out sep: 


p 


dressi 


sandwiches made 


1 generously 


CRAB MEAT HOURBON 
(Serves six) 


sh cab lump or 8 ТМ 
Alaska King crab 


4 tablespoons butter 

1⁄4 Ib. fresh mushrooms, thinly sliced 
blespoous minced shallots or scil 
lions 

teaspoon paprika 


1 

3 om. bourbon 
3 tablespoons flour 
1 pint light cı 
3 
° 
1 


vam 

egg yolks, well beaten 

ozs. oloroso sherry 

teaspoon Pernod 

Salt, pepper, cayenne pepper 
Before theater: Examine crab. lump 

carefully. removing any pieces of shell or 
cartilage. Melt butter in large saucepan 
over low flame. Add mushrooms, shallots 
prika. Sauté, stirring frequently, 
minutes, Add crab lump aud 
sauté, stirring frequently. until heated 
through. Add bourbon and set it ablaze 
When flames subside, stir in flour. mi 
ng well. Add light cream and simmer. 
don't boil, 5 minutes. Remove from 
flame and store, covered. 
until after еме 
crabdump mixture in top section of 
chafing dish over simmering water, When 
mixture is hot. remove 3 tablespoons 
sauce amd combine with egg yolks, 
mixing well. Add yolks to chafing dish 
and continue to heat. stirring constant 
ly, umil sauce begins 1o thicken. 
Add sherry and Pernod: add salt and 
pepper to taste and a dash of cayenne 
pepper. Keep fame under ch dish 
as low as possible. Serve with rice or 
noodles. 


Im 


PORTUGUESE BACALHAU 
(Serves six) 
6 cups mashed potatoes 
2 Пол. cans cooked salt 
smoked finnan haddie, dr: 
blespoons melted butter 
1 cup milk 
2 tablespoons olive oil 
1 cup heavy cream 
blespoons minced chives or scal- 
ms 
1 hard-boiled egg yolk 
5 сри yolks 
lb. sweer butter 
Juice of 14 lemon 
Salt, pepper, cayenne pepper 
6 eggs 
6 slices black truffle 
Before theater: In large mixing bowl, 
combine potatoes, codfish, melted bur- 
ter, milk, olive oil, 1⁄4 cup heavy cream 
and chives, Mix well. Salt is usually not 
necessary, because of saltiness of fish, but 


codfish or 
ied 


a generous dash of pepper should bc 
added. Spread in shallow casserole to a 
depth of 114 ins. Store in refrigerator 
ter theater. Force h led egg 
gh fine suainer into well of 
blender, Add raw egg yolks. 
Heat butter in small saucepan over low 
flame until melted. but not brown. Re 


move from flame. Spin blender [or about 


10 seconds, Slowly add hot butter. a table- 
spoon at a time, through opening in 
blender top. until butter is used and 
sauce is emulsified. Turn off blender. Add 


lemon juice, a generous dash each of salt 
and pepper and a light dash of cayenne 
pepper. Run blender for a few seconds to 
combine seasonings. Store sauce, covered, 
in warm place until needed. After theater: 
Preheat oven at 400°. Whip remaining 1 
cup cream until thick, Place casserole in 
oven 20 to 25 minutes. Poach 6 eggs in 
lightly salted water or in egg poacher 


Spread whipped cream over bacalhau 
and place under broiler flame until light 
m broiler and. place 
poached eggs on bacalhau. Spoon sauce 
over eggs. lop cach egg with a slice of 
truflle. Serve with a green salad tossed 
with olive oil and red-wine vinegar 


brown. Remove Ir 


GLAZED CORNED-BEEF BRISKET 


(Serves six) 


cup brown sugar 

1 cup crabapple jelly 

3 tablespoons prepared horseradish 

1 tablespoon Dusseldorf mustard 

1 teaspoon dry mustard 

Whole cloves 

Before theater: Soak corned beef over 
night in cold water. Simmer in fresh wa 
ter until tender, 4 to 5 hours, Let it cool 


5 Ibs. corned-beef. brisket 
D 
[ 


in the cooking liquid. After theater: Re- 
move corned beef from liquid. Preheat 
oven at 1507, Make a smooth paste of 
the brown sugar, jelly, horseradish and 
both kinds of mustard. Score the fat on 
top of the corned beef by drawing diag 
onal lines with a French knife at Lin, 
intervals. Stick a Clove into each section. 
Spread glaze on corned beef. Place in 
shallow pan and bake 30 ıo 40 minutes, 
or until top of corned beef is glazed a 
rich brown. Serve with a potato, tomato 
amd cucumber salad, and garnishes of 
cold chowchow and pickled walnuts 


FILET MIGNON, SAUCE PIQUANTE 


(Serves six) 


6 filets mignons, В ол. cach 
1 db. large fresh mushrooms 
Sweet butter 


1 15-07. can artichoke bottoms, drained 
1 cup dry red wine 
1 cup chicken broth, fresh or canned 
cup onion, small dice 
cup finely minced dill pickle 
spoons beef extract 

1 tablespoon minced fresh parsley 

1⁄4 teaspoon dried chervil 

1 tablespoon red-wine vinegar 

Sali. pepper 

6 slices French bread 

Before theater; Wash mushrooms. Cut 
stem ends protruding beyond caps. Use 
ends Гог another cooking purpose, or 


2 u 


discard. Place mushrooms in large shal 
low saucepan with 2 tablespoons butter 
Sauté, covered, 5 minutes. Remove from 
Пате. Place artichoke bottoms in same 
pin and store in refrigerator for later 
‘ating. Pour wine and chicken broth 
into deep saucepan. Add and 
pickle and simmer slowly until liquid is 
reduced to | cup. Add 3 tablespoons 
butter, beef extract, parsley, chervil and 
ir. When butter is melted, remove 
from Пате, Cool slightly and pour into 
Blend 1 minute 
at high speed. Season with salt and. рер 
per to taste, Return to saucepan and 
store in refrigerator until needed. After 
theater shrooms and artichoke 
bottoms until heated through. Preheat 
electric ski 100°. Pan-broil filets 
mignons, without added fat, until medi 
um brown on both sides. While filets are 
pan-broiling, toast bread. Remove filets 
from skillet and place on toast on serv- 
ing platter. Pour wine sauce into skillet 
and bring to a boil. Top filet mignon 
with artichoke botroms and. mushrooms 
Pour steaks. Serve with 
French fried potatoes 

As Ethel Barrymore once said, 
all there is, there isn't any more 
trust will you 
bravos and curtain calls 


re 
onion 


well of electric blender 


Sauté 


let ar 


sauce over 


That's 
" We 


these dishes win many 


the Hardwick knight measures up 


The metric measi 


ments of the Moon-Maid are yet to be determined. 


Whatever the situation or adventurous deed of the Hardwick Knight, his authentically 


styled all wool flannel blazer will appropriately fit the occasion. 


Available in 


many shades of chivalry: Navy, Burgundy, Black, Red, Olive, Cambridge, 
Antique Gold, Bottle Green, Dusky Camel, and French Blue. Your group crest at 
small additional charge. " Also, for the maidens, The Coed Blazer. 


About $32.50 
Slightly higher In the Far West 


Hardwick „А. 


(Cleveland, Tennessee эз 


PLAYBOY 


206 


Y BE DN 


the taste of an apple from that of a raw 


potato while holding your nose. 
Nevertheless, the tongue has its pleas 
ures if it is allowed help by two other 


senses: smell and touch. Sweet-sour-salt- 
hitter not only provides lifesaving way 
of disa ng among possible foods 
nd possible poisons, but it is also а 
undamental erotic spectrum: probably 
many more people like to taste their lov- 
ers than are vet willing to admit it. Here 
both touch and odor play important 
is. The tongue is exquisitely supplied 
with all duce touch senses—wve'll get to 
those shortly—and. in addition, is highly 
muscular and mobile. Given this combi- 
nation of attributes, what we call taste 
is, in fact, so sophisticated a sense ser 
that it has an art form of its own—cook- 
ing—which the future will doubtless 
refine but is not likely to surpass. Basi- 
cally, taste will not change until the 
sense of smell does 

1. Touch. M the opposite pole from 
taste, touch is actually three complete 
senses, which detect, respectively, heat 
cold, pressure (includ /smooth) 


(continued from page 134) 


and раш. H is thus a highly refined, 
sensitive and discrim ing faculty with 
endless possibilities for new stimuli avail 
able for technological exploitation. 

To my sorrow, 1 do not think that 
of these possibilities are sexual 
‘There simply are few novelties even im- 
aginable in this field. As Frederik Pohl 
noted in The Playboy Panel: 1984 and 
Beyond (July and August. 1963), there is 
probably not a single square inch of the 
human body that has not been exploited 
by the tactile senses for sexual pleasure 
at one time or another, and the senses of 
touch are too 
fooled by manipulators less perfectly 
adapted to it than the human hand 

This question arises immediately be 
as Dr. Walter has also pointed 
out—the sense of touch conveys sexual 


m: 


discriminating to be 


cause 


suggestion faster and more directly than 
does any other sense. Hence, to the sug- 
gestible, almost any kind of sensation 

side the wide arena of posible touch 


aple, let us sunt with the 


responses may be sexually arousi 
As 


75... As I suppose all litile boys do, our Herbie has 


fallen in love with his nurse. . . 


Ace; water. 


ıl subst. 
has been popular 


world’s most neut 
Nude mixed bathi 
for many centuries, more probably for 
the excuse it offers for nudity than for 
anything the water adds; though many 
men like their girls slippery, water is an 
impediment to the act of love itsell, be 
cause it washes away the precoital fluids. 

Bur water in motion, especially if 
warm, is а cıress. Many women will testi- 
fy, if pressed gently, to hav wd 
their earliest sexual excitement in the 
motion of bath water (sec, lor example, 
that housewite’s handbook on promiscui- 
ty that got Ralph Ginzburg into trouble 
with the post office). Masturbation in 
the bath is not quite as common among 
men, becuse the testicles do not func 
tion at heats above body temperature— 
that is why they are out there in the cold 
stead of inside, as a woman's glands 
sensibly are—ut it is far from rare (see 
Leopold Blooms meditation on the 
subject, in James Joyce's Ulysses) 

This eflct probably could be in 
proved upon, through an offshoot of hy 
drotherapy—that_ now largely outmoded 
method of dunking the mentally ill (and 
the physically debilitated) into whirlpool 
baths, made popular at home by tu 
cuzri device. Recent work in a technique 
called clectrophoresis—a technique. that, 
among other things, shows promise of 
predetermining the sex of babies 
artificial insemination, since it selectiv 
ly affects the migration of sperm—as 
shown that, under certain conditions, liq- 
uids сап be made locally even in 
a small tub, thus suggesting that а bath 
with a multiplex of local eddies im it 
might be possible, caressing the bather 
wherever he or she prefers. Turbulence 


о sw 


is pant of the f 


a of swimming: now it is 


possible to contiol it. Furthermore, the 


vast range of available and possible cde- 
tegents makes it possible to change the 
texture of the bath, as oils and arc 
make it either soothe or tingle; gels 
might change its density. thus mak 
or making it 


eddies in ir firmer, 
more womblike: or present bubble-bath 
formulas could easily be modified 10 fill 
the tub with foam all the way to the bot 
tom, amd make the [oam as sticky and 
persistent as a (тоду nest, should you 
want it that way. (And why not load the 
bubbles with odors and gaseous 
cams, 10 pop into the air around you in 
y order you like—controlled. perhaps, 
hy the rate of cooling of the water—on 
the model of timerclease drug capsulesz 
"This wouldn't lect your sense of touch, 
but it might abet it, as odor abets taste.) 

Some stimulation of the sense of 
touch in various ways is also a likely pos 
sibility—not only for shaking the dirt off, 
as science-fiction writers have suggested. 
but also for pleasure. It could be com 
bined with bathing, too, since most 
uids convey sounds much better than air 
Combinations of these principles 
might also be incorporated into a bed, 


does. 


for on-the-spot massage, like those that 
have been standard equipment im air- 
port hotels for some yens, but more 
specifically directed. to tactile or sexual 
pleasures than 10 simple relaxation 
They might also be designed into a suit 
that could be worn to work. Such a suit 
tight be a form of on-the-job diversion 
more acceptable to the innocent. by- 
stander, and to the boss, than a transistor 
adio or a Thermos bottle full of marti- 
nis might be. 

Some people le for kicks. Spe- 
cialisis maintain large collections of jade 
for this purpose, which they n water 


ight be enh: 


ain. this pleasure m 
by other dipping solutions. Va 
Asian peoples also carve stroking stones 

| small sizes that are carried on the 


son, not as amulets but simply for 
the pleasure they give to the touch, or 


for relief in moments of tension, Smooth- 
ly sculpied. pieces of this kind can be 
outright hypnotic, This use of touch has 
not yer evolved into an art form in the 
West, but it has its precursors: Ameri 
s finger loose change and keys in thei 
pockets; Greeks have worry beads; Eng- 
lishmen fondle cane and umbre 
idle. As an art, it might well be de- 
veloped even further in the West, since 
the vast field of plastics has opened for it 
whole new realm of possible textures 
And why. pray. has nobody ever done 
anything interesting (o the touch with 
under Some of it now pleases the 
сус, but its history as something intended 
to bc worn next to thc skin is dismal. 
For a long time, there simply wasn't 
In the late Renaissance, as outer cloth- 
grew stiffer, heavier and more for 
man's shift (a linen 
or designed 10 prevent 
brocade scratch) expanded to а skirt and 
later imo petticoats. Comfort 
promptly went out the window, how- 


cv by the late 19th and early 20th 
Centuries, women's underwear was all 
whalebone, elastic nd hot, 


heavy, confining and likely to bring on 
the peculiar hunger faints then called 
chlorosis, and ridden in the back by 
bustles big enough to support a tea tray. 

Light, pleasant, small underwear for 
women did not become popular until the 
1090. with the of the one- 
piece garment called the step-in, of John 
Held memory. This was later divided 
into two pieces and the slip was added— 
and there has been no real change since. 
Throughout this history, there was only 
1 to touch, which might be sub- 
slogan “Nothing feels 
This has now changed; nowa- 
days. almost everything fee i 
which is no real improveme 
course, have always been shortchan, 
on their undergarments: Ric 
ner was often accused of being some sort 
of pervert because he liked. silk. under- 


invention 


nd would buy no other kind afer 
me affluent: and today the only 
available to the luxury- 
the clammy. slippery spec 
trum. of wash-and-wear fabrics, most of 
which feel terrible. This is a shame, for 
people would like to buy clothes for 
their tactile qualities. Americans and 
citizens of other affluent. cultures stub. 
bornly will not wear clothes to maich 
their climates partly for that reas 
(though more largely because of the 
tyranny of custom and fashion). 

ashion designers, who work for show, 
are seldom far behind technology in € 
ploiting the optical possibilities of new 


labrics as witness the new transparent 
styles, (Someday they may get around to 
intermittent transparency—labries that. 


cam be seen through only under spe 
kinds of lighting.) But their appeals to 
touch have been astonishingly primitive. 
In the future, our clothing may become 
as much of a pleasure to feel 
look at. A fortune awaits the desi 
who fimt pms this elementary notion 
imo practice, particularly for the benchi 
of men. 

5. Sight. 


The 


lent of op art has 


reminded us that sight, too, сап pro 
duce physical sensations—of motion 
distance igo, Iree tight, 
freedom mary metrical 
Пате, and many others—which can 
transcend the usual subjective experi- 


ences of recognizing a dog or the color 
of fic light. 1 say "reminded" be- 
cause these nonsymbolic optical. experi- 


ences have been known to physiologists 
for more than half a century, as only 


опе small aspect of this most marvelous 


nd complex of the classical five senses. 
more 


(There are, as we shall see, 
than five.) Mostly. however, they 
been treated as oddities or paradoxes of 
vision, of no special interest; though one 
of them—the illusion that the moon. is 
larger near the horizon than at the zc- 
nith—has fascinated. poets for centu 
Op ап undertaken t0 remind us 
that things are seldom what they seem. 
a truism likely to enrich us all once w 
decide to look at it seriously. 

No quick and partial review could do 
justice 10 the wonders and mysteries of 
sight, à sense that utterly dominates the 
human brain and processes most of the 
information we receive from outside, 
а uly stupendous rue. Animal brain 
tissue is mostly devoted to serving the 
nose, but in humans, the eye is king 
nose gets snubbed. We are all voye 
like it or not. 

As Dr. Walter 
not everybody t 
ly а sizable section of ma 
in abstractions, without forming mental 
pictures, and marriage between the í 
types is not recommended—but visualiza 
on is certainly very widespread, both 
deliberately and in dreams. Direct stimu 
lation of the brain to produce visions or 
dreams. with plots and a full range ol 
other accompanying sensations, is a 
science-fiction idea of long standing. 

The posibility of living a completely 


many 


and others have shown. 
s visu: 


207 


Underwear that's styled for the 


ious life was invoked by Laurence 
g and the late Fletcher Pratt. in 
The City of the Living Dead, which pre- 
diated that for many persons such a life 
would be more atmacuve than reality. 
(Мом of the people in the story were, in 
Tact, living the same dream lile over and 
over again, not [rom choice but because 
the atiendants had become too lax to 
bother changing the recordings.) 

A present-day surgical procedure called 
stereotanis, involving direct implantation 
of electrodes into the brain, makes such 
wnovation look entirely possible. It 
already been found that such direct 
stimulition can invoke specific sensations 
and even specific memories. Patients 
whose brains are being explored in this 
way find themselves suddenly in the 
midst of their high school prom, hear 
the voice of a long-dead relative or 
find the operating theater incongruously 
«dolent of violets. These are not simply 
recalled, but experienced directly. as im 
mediate events, No special recording 
would be needed to produce these re 
sults, only a weak, undifferentiated elec- 

ical a s where the current 


Direct imp 
sue will probably not prove to be neces- 
sary. Dr. Walter and his colleagues have 
already found that such effects can be 
produced by using а subject’s own brain 


waves to control the frequency of a stim- 
ulus, such as a flashing light. This 
process, called "flickerdeedback." is limit- 


It provides 
osing epilepsy, 
have extended it 


ed to medicine at present 
sure-fire method. of di 
and Soviet physicians 
10 the artificial induction of sleep. How- 
ever, there is no reason in principle why 
it could nor be used to induce almost 
any sensation, even a full 3-D. odorous, 
tactile stag production. The technique 
obviously is not limited to sight, though 
ar present the eyes are the most fre- 
quenily used portal for the brain stimuli 
involved 

Other senses: Even without appealing 
to clairvoyance, telepathy or other "ex- 
trasensory” perceptions whose existence 
is dubious, the human body possesses a 


two senses can often be fooled by the 
eye, but they do not depend upon it. 

ure that awaits some of us 
e from the nullification of 
these two senses free fall, which pro- 
ion of weiglilessness. In or- 


duces а sen: 


dinary life we are always oriented by the 
inner ear that is, we know which way is 
up—and we under a constant accelera 


tion of 32 feet per second per second 
the acceler gravity. In space 
flight, once the rocket or other prime 
mover is turned off, there is no up or 
down and gravity is zero: everything 
floats. Though this situation reportedly 
made a couple of Soviet cosmonauts feel 
rather dizzy, most spacemen to date have 
enjoyed it. A group of British and Aus 
walian writers, headed by Arthur C. 
Clarke and A. Bertram Chandler, have 
for years been compiling a dossier of cs- 
says and verse on the possible joys of sex 
in free fall. Some of the effects they cele 
ate are clearly exaggerated, but it is 
dent that there's a lot to look forward 
10 in a situation where absolutely no po- 
sition is impossible. It would have its 
dangers, 100: the cardinal rule would be, 
Hold tight! 

Some of the other senses are wholly 
interior and seem permanently inaccessi- 
ble to outside intervention for 
purposes of pleasure, such as the sense 
that reports on the lacticacid content of 
the muscles, expressed as fatigue. Even 
in this area, however, there are some sur- 
prises. Take, for example, the two senses 


that measure the acid-alkaline balance of 
the blood and its ionic content. This 
sounds very recondite, but actually, 


these two are fundamental to two of the 
great pleasures: One is expressed ав hun. 
ger (blood-sugar level) and (he other as 
thirst (blood-pH or hydrogen-ion con- 
centration). Satisfying their demands is 
pleasurable quite apart from odor or 
taste, as a small group of people called 
o have no sense of smell, 


anosmics, w 
can tesi 


y. 


Iu is these interior senses, particularly 
the chemical ones with their direct ac 
cess 10 the brain through the blood 


stream, that are acted upon to produce 


bold look. 

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good many senses beyond the classical 
five, In Таа, we have already considered 
ten, because of the three quite distinct 
senses involved in touch and the four in 


the experiences associated. with. hashish. 
heroin, alcohol and the more 
psychedelic drugs such as mornin, 
d LSD 25. These senses, 


taste. The kaes count indicates that ing the one that monitors the body's 
the other “IN” styles this Fall. there are at least 24 senses. Some of temperature, also respon- 
So go ahead. Co totally bold. Anyone | them are quite obvious amd have already — sible for the deliriums produced by some 


who says underwear has to be dull been used as vehicles of pleasure: for ех- illness 
just doesn't know about Life. ample, the sense of balance, upon which Another such sense almost unknown 
OTS almost all forms of amusementpark to the Layman is called proprioception. 
what's happening. rides depend for their effectiveness, cow which reports to the brain the relative 

pled with the sense of positions and states of tension of the 


muscles, It is this sense, with some as- 
sistance from touch and the sense of 
balance, that enables a man to tell 
it is chan c of motion that we en- what position his body is in, even in 
joy. For some reason, we find an increase the dark, Direct neural stimulation of 
in rate pleasant, a decrease unpleasant) — various musde center, on the model 
As motion pictures demonstrate, these ol the present-day (and useless) system of 


which is what makes speeding fun. (Мс 
locity alone, without visual or atmos 
pheric reference, produces no sensation; 


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208 


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reducing that makes the muscles jump 
without consciously directed exercise, 
might provide interesting exploitations 
of this sense. Just such a stimulator, 
n the form of an clecuical prod. is 
presently used 10 force the ultimate per 
formance out of reluctant stud bulls: 
and it need not be cd to males, 
for the deep (vaginal) fer 
almost entirely a set of simultaneous 
proprioceptive discharges from the con- 
tactile muscles—the same ones animals 
use for tail wagging—not more than 
slightly heightened by the sense of touch, 
since the vagi scly supplied. 
with tactile nerves. stence of this 
sense makes quite feasible the device 
described in a famous limerick (here 
slightly bowdlerized): 


There was a young man from Racine 
Who invented a lovemaking machine. 
Concave and convex, 
Tt would fit every sex, 
And amuse itself, too, in between. 


nally, there is. indeed, such a thing 
as extrasensory pleasure. Tis exist 
was deduced from recent animal studies, 
which found in the brain a “pleasure 
Center” that can be electrically 
lated. Animals so wired. and given access 
тө a pedal by which they can deliver 
themselves a joli to the pleasure. center 
at will. abandon all other activities in its 
favor, The sensation involved for the 
animal can onlv be guessed at. bur it 
appears 10 be "pure" pleasure, not any 
specific sensation to which pl 
secondary; at least there are no surface, 
physical reactions that suggest the in 
volvement of one sense over another. 
How humans might react to such a 
stimulus is unknown at present (though 
there are unconfirmed reports that the 
experiment has been wied in Sweden). 
but there's reason 1 suppose not only 
that such a pleasure center exists in 
people but that it may be better de- 
veloped in humans than in апу other 
animal 
What would such a pleasur 
No one knows H may turn out to be 
er specific amd closely identified with 
onc or another old friend, such as the 
orgasm: or rather generalized, like a high- 
ly intensified version of the feeling of 
omething totally novel 
and comparable with nothing in our pre 
vious experience. If the animal experi 
ments are uide. it may well turn 
out to be not only delightful but obses 
sive, suitable only for the strong-willed. 
One thing is sure: [n the near future 
somebody is going ло ay it, And why 
not? There is no reason any of us should 
be addicts to only onc 
ure, or only a few. 7 e gond 
that the ellecty of pleasure technology 
on human history will be quite as drastic 
and beneficent as (he invention of 


electricity. 


ncc 


stimu- 


asure is 


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ifi 


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209 


PLAYBOY 


210 


Как 9u The Rorschach Shirt (continued from pase 92) 


sweet pincushion flesh? Yes! But 
1 saw only cheese-grater, kitchen- 
ns. All beauty turned sour gro- 
tesque. Swiveling my gaze was like 
swiveling the two-hundredinch Palomar 
telescope in my damned skull. Everywhere 


I looked J saw the meteor-bombarded 


moon, in dread super close-up 
"Mysell? God, shaving mornings was 
те torture. 1 could not pluck 
eyes from my lost baule-pined 
e. Damnation, Immanuel Brokaw, 1 
e the Grand Canyon at 


ë 


f: 
soughed, you 
high noon! 
“In sum. my contact lenses had made 
me fifteen years old again. That is: a 
selferucified bundle of doubt, horror 


and absolute imperfection. The worst 
age in all one's life had returned to 
haunt me with its pimpled. bumpy ghost 

“I lay, a sleepless wreck. Ah. second 
How 


cried. 
DEM 
ad knew it, 


adolescence, 
could 1 have 
years? Blind, 


ke pity 1 
so bl 


ways said it was of no importance, So I 
groped about the world as lustful 
myope, nearsightedly missing the holes, 
rips, tea 
as myself. Now, reality had run me dow: 
in the street. And the reality 

“I went to bed for several days. 
1 sat up im bed and proclaimed, wide 
eyed: Reality is not all! 1 refuse this 
knowledge. I legislate against pores! I 
accept instead those truths we intuit, or 
make up. to live by. 

1 waded in my eyeballs. 

“That is, 1 handed my corncalcontact 
lenses to a sadist nephew who thrives on 
ages, Lumpy people, hairy things. 

"I dapped back on my old underco 
rected specs. 1 strolled through а world 
of returned and genie mists. D saw 
enough but not too much. 1 found half 
discerned ghost peoples 1 could lov 
again. 1 saw the ‘me’ in the morning 
glass T could once more bed with, admire 
and take as chum, I began to laugh each 


"Well, this is it! The highest man has ever 
climbed under the influence of alcohol” 


day with new happiness. Softly. Then, 
very loud. 

"What a joke, Simon, life is. 

“From vanity we buy lenses that see 
all and so lose everything! 

"And by giving up some small h 
piece of so-called wisdom, reality, truth, 
we pain back an entirety of Hile! Who 
does not know this? Writers do! Intuited 
novels are far more "iue than all your 
scribbled data-fact reportage in the 1 
tory of the world! 

“Bur at Јам I had to face the great 
twin fractures lying athwart my con 
science. My eyes. My cars Holy cow, 
1 said, softly. The thousand folk who 
tread my oflices and creaked my couches 
and looked for echoes in my Delphic 
cave, preposterous! J had seen none of 
them, nor heard any de; 


“Did Mrs. Serapwight really resemble 
and speak like an Egyptian papyrus 
mummy fallen out of a rug at my desk? 

“I could not even guess. Two thou- 
samd days of fogs surrounded my lost 
children, mere voices calling, fading, 
gonc. 

"My God, 1 
place with an 


ndered the market 
ble sign махы AND 
pear and people had rushed to fill my 
beggars cup with coins and run off 
cured. Cured! Isn't (hal miraculous 
strange? Cured D 

rm gone 


nd one leg mis- 
ing. What? What did I say right to them 
out of hearing wrong? Who indeed were 
those people? 1 will never know. 
“And then T thought: There are а 


arly than 1. But 
whose pati aked into high seas 
or leap off playground slides at 
ог wuss women up and smoke 
over t 

“So Thad to face the irreducible fact 
of a successful career. 

“The lame do uot lead the lame, my 
reason cried, the bl lı do not 
апе halt. the blind! But a voice 
from the far balcony of my soul replied 


with immense irony: Beeswax and Bull 

! You, Immanuel Brokaw, are a 

genius, which means. cracked 

bur I! Your occluded eyes sec 

your corked ears hear. Your fractured 

ilities cure ar some level below 
jousness! Bravo! 

“But no, I could not live with my per- 

lect imperfections. 1 could not under 


stand nor tolerate t " 
which. id obluscations. 
played meadow doctor to the world and 


ig secret thi 


hrough screens 


cured held beasts. 
“I had several choices, и 
corneal lenses back in? Buy ¢ 
help my rapidly improving sense ol 
sound? And then? Find I had lost touch. 


with my best and hidden mind that had 


ibly accustomed to thirty 
ing? 


grown comfor 
years ol bad vision and lousy li 
chavs both for сигет and cured. 
“Stay blind and deaf and work? Tt 
seemed a dreadful fraud, though my 
record way laundry fresh, pressed white 
and clean. 
So I ret 


ed. 


wacked my bags and ran off into 
golden oblivion to let the incredible 
a my most terrible strange 


wax collect 
We rode in the bus along the shore in 
the waym afternoon, А [ем clouds 
moved over the sun. Shadows misted on 
the sands and the people s 
the colored umbrellas. 
1 cleaved my throat. 
“Will you ever return 
п, doctor?” 
1 practice now." 
"Bur you just sa 
“Oh, not ollicially 


wn under 


to praci 


ot with an 


office or lees, по, never that ag: The 
doctor laughed quietly. “I am sore-beset 
by the Mystery, anyway. That is, of how 


I cured all those people with a laying on 
of hands even though my arms were 
chopped off at the elbows. Still, now, I 
do keep my ‘hand’ 

“How? 


“This shirt of mine. You saw. You 
heard.” 

"Coming down the aisk 

“Exactly. The colors. The patterns. 


Ove thing to thar man, another to the 
girl, a third to the boy. Zebras, goats, 


lightuings. Egyptian amuleis. What, 
Y what? I ask. And: answer, answei 


The Man in the Rorschach 


Shirt. 
“I have a dozen such shirts at home. 


“All colors, all diff 
One was designed for me by Jackson 
Pollock before he died. I wear cach shirt 
Tor a day. or a week, if the going, the 
swers, are thick, fast, full of 
and reward, Then off with the old 
on with the new. Ten billion glam 
ten billion startled responds! 

"Might I not market these Rorschach 


ement 
and 


Shinty to your psychoanalyst on 
2 Test your friends? Shock your 
hbors? Titillate your wile? No. no. 


is my own special private most dear 
No one must share it. Me and my 
the bus, and a thousand 
L The beach waits. And 
my people! 


fun 


on i 
“So I walk the shor 
world. There 


of this summer 
ng. 
scomtent it would a 
most se h a rumor beyond 
the dunes, 1 walk along in my own time 
1 way and come on people and let th 
vind Hap my great sailcloth shirt now 

ing north, south or south-by.west 
ich their eyes pop. glide, le 
м. wonder. And when a certain ре 
says a certain word about my i 
slashed cotton colors, 1 give р: 
chat. 1 walk with them awhile. We peer 


та, 


yes 


"He's a legend in his own time." 


into the great glass of the sea. I sidewise 
peer into their soul, Sometimes we stroll 
for hours a longish session with the 
weather, Usually it takes but that onc 
day and, not knowing with whom they 
walked, scot-free, they are discharged. all 
unwitting patients. They walk on down 
the dusky shore toward a fairer, brighter 
eve. Behind their backs, the deaf.blind 
man waves them bon voyage and trots 
home, there to devour happy suppers, 
brisk with fine work done 

“Or sometimes I meet some half-slum 
berer on the sand whose troubles cannot 
all be fetched out to die in the raw light 
of one day. Then, as by accident, we col- 
lide a week later and walk by the tidal 
thum, doing what has always been done: 
we have our traveling confessional. For 
long belore pent-up priests and whispers 
wd repentances. friends walked, talked. 
ad in the listening-tlk cured 
cach other's sour despairs. Good friends 
wade hair balls all the time, give gifts of 
and so are vid of them. 
collects on lawns and in 
1 bright shirt and nail-tipped 
wash stick I ser out each dawn to... 
clean up the beaches. So m. 
many bodies lying out there 
So many minds lost in the dark. I irv to 
alk among them all, without... stir 
bling . . 

The wind blew in the bus window 
cool and fresh, making а sea of 
through the thoughtful old man 
termed shirt 
The bus stopped. 
Di. Brokaw suddenly 
id leaped up. "Wait 
Everyone on the bus turned as if to 
ich the exit of a star perfor 
onc smiled. 

Dr. Brokaw pumped my h 


listened, 


minds, W 


w wl 


front end of the bus he 
his own forgetfulness. 
k glasses and sqi 
me with his weak baby-blue eves. 

"You. he said. 

Already, 10 him, 1 was a mist. a poin- 
tillist dream somewhere out beyond the 
of vision. 

You . he called. imo that fabu 
lous cloud ol existence that surrounded 


turned. 
lifted. his 


ıd pressed. him warm "you 
never fold me. What? What. 
He stood tall to display that incredi 


ble Rorse 
swarmed 
color. 

1 looked. I blinked. I answered 

“А sunrise!" 1 cried. 

The doctor reeled with this gentle 
ndly blow. 
Are you sure it isn't a sunse 
called, cupping one hand t0 his 

1 looked again and smiled. 1 1 
he saw my smile a thousand miles 
within the bus 

No.” Í said. "A sunrise. A beautiful 
sunrise 

He shut his eyes to digest the words 
His great hands wandered along the 


h shirt, which fluuered and 
with everchanging li nd 


shore of his wind gentled shirt. He nod 
ded. Then he opened his pale eyes. 
waved, and stepped out into the world. 


I looked back once. 


The bus drove on 


a random sampling of the world, a thou 
sand. bathers m light. 
He se tread 
water of peopl 
The Lust D saw of him, he was still 


gloriously afloat 


upon 


211 


PLAYBOY 


212 


LIKE, ONCE UPON A TIME 


(continued from page 142) 


he spied Ambe 


Not being particularly 
vain or prudish, he was admiring thing 
that ghe townspeople wouldn't allow 
themselves t0 see. But having also read 
Zinbars public notices and. knowing of 
that knave's operations in other towns, he 
was fully aware of what was happening. 
Just as the salesman was inserting 
stronger lens into his telescope, Amber 
collapsed on the sidewalk. Apparently 
the excitement combined. with the suis 
strong rays had been 100 much for her 
Immedi salesman put down his 
telescope, went over to his suitcase, 
afer rummaging through it for a 
seconds, found what he wanted 
Meanwhile, out Main Street 


the 
townspeople were gathered around the 


on 


s Amber. 
ai 


"Give du said onc. 


‘Loosen her garments." said another. 

aintaining his vanity in spite ol 
everything 

At that moment the salesman pushed 


throu 
ward Amber. When the people got a good 
look him, they were horror-stricken 
He, too, was dressed actly the same 
fashion as when he stepped out of the 
shower 


€ сома. making his way 10 


1 ¢ 


“Police!” screamed a citizen, pointin; 
at the salesman. 
Arrest th: shouted another 


But the salesman was unperturbed. As 
the crowd began to converge and claw at 
he said, 
ing my Zinba 


Please, please, you're sully 
suit." 


Sure enough, Scotch-taped on the back 
of the stranger's neck was the very same 
label as that worn by Amber. When they 
sow it, everyone stepped back. 

Kneeling before the almost lifeless girl, 
the salesman said, “Please give me room. 
I know all about first aid, and 1 want to 
help this poor git 


n began to administer artificial 

respiration to Amber, which included 

mouth-to-mouth resuscitation, and many. 
many, many, man 


innovations ihe townspeople m 
deemed highly unusual had they not 
considered the couple to be fully dressed. 
When at das Amber stirred and 
opened her eves, a rather serene and 
blissful look appeared on her face. The 
crowd cheered, and the mayor, who was 
perhaps the vainot man. i 
town, threw himself ar the 
feet and wept gratefully 
“Thanks to you 
“my daughter's life 
1 would like to р 
you might wish.” 
п thought for а moment 
and then made a strange request 
The mayor, taken aback by the sheer 
iodesty ol it, was nevertheless delighted 
nt it. 
And so from then on, the salesma 
ne permanent lifeguard at the town 
beach. And to this day he can be seen on 
the sand at all hours, in his Zinbar bath- 
ing suit, administering artificial respira- 
tion 10 girls ako in Zinbar bathing suits 
—many of whom. strangely enough, have 
never even been in the water. 


the entire 
salesman's 


aid.” he said, 
ed. Now 
favor that 


first 


10 


be- 


“That's the ‘extra something’ 1 was talking 


about, McCallister, 


that distinguishes 


excellence from shoddy mediocrity.” 


MED OTS 
(continued from page 126) 


for my first investment with their recom- 
mended man, they shook their heads in 
unison. "Sell it, that stock's 
advised. My broker urged me to wi 
а while longer: he sent me a long letter 
with the company's earnings and. bright 
prospects spelled out in near tables. He 
took me to lunch at a dignified Wall 
Street executive luncheon club reserved 
partners and customers’ men and 
guests, and 1 was deeply pleased to 

those richly wood-paneled and 
nd bowed to his 
stock ral 


be in 
ather-chaired room: 
superior knowledge. When th 
lied some weeks later to 46 and 1 could 
have got out almost even, 1 took his 
word that the rally represented а tur 
ing point for the stock and bided my 
time. But the stock fell back ıo 40. then 
fell through that support level and 
eventually going as 
ly sold it. months 
later, it was at 3 loss of S6781.16. 
Sirikes, regional gasoline price wars 
and Government curtailment ol urani- 
um purchases (an important source of 
income for Kerr-MeGee) were blamed 
for the company's disappointing carn- 
ings figures that eventually. appeared 
and the lower price of the stock. Bu 
I knew was that “a sure thing” had 
again led me to disaster. Long before the 
stock was sold, but after it had dipped 
considerably below the prices I had paid 
for it, it was decided that my broker 
would buy for me only the stocks he was 
also buying for my two astute friends. 
Now at last J felt safe: They were mak- 
ing money—1 would make money 
For a time this proved true. They 
came up with an over-the-counter real 
estaedevelopment firm. called. Dunbar 
Corporation, whose earnings looked 
poised to soar. I bought only 100 shares 
—at 1334; within three weeks it was 
1814. My friends’ contacts had obvi 
supplied some inside information 
provided me, too, with a head start. 1 
sold the stock а few months Iuer at 19, 
for almost a $500 profit, Then a houer 
tip came along—Rockower Brothers, also 
over the counter, a company in the new- 
ly burgeoning discount field. whose 
carnings picture promised to be phe- 
nomenal. I bought 200 shares and in less 
than tw hs sold the stock for a 
51750 profit. 1 was on the right track 
With one horribly costly detour 
1 had sill been keeping my daily 
charts, which now incorporated. volume 
as well as price, on 12 to 20 stocks that 
had caught my eye in the services E sub- 


low as ?5. Whi 


scibed (o, 1 saw (har certain stocks 
would trade in a very narrow range Гог 
months at a time, moving up three 
points, backing down the same three 
points, moving up once —always 
bouncing between the same ceiling price 


and the same floor figure. It seemed so 
easy, after watching a stock act this way 
four or five times run i 
the lower figure and sell it at thc higher 
onc. It is пие there would be only 
point or two of profit: but if one boug 
500 shares of the stock, then one's gain 
could be 5500 or $1000 in a short time. 

I tried out the theory, receiving no 
gument from my broker, with 500 shares 
of a stock I had been watching on the 
American Stock Exchange called Gener- 
al Development. I had seen it hold three 
times s bottom level, 13, and I 
bought 500 shares at that figure; 1 sold 
them abour ten days later at 1414. for a 
5595 profit. 

The whole process seemed simple and 
rewarding, and I was eager to try again. 
For some time I had been plotting 
Brunswick, the glamor issue that had 
skyrocketed the year belore and had 
been, even in 1961, as high as 747%. I 
saw it moving in а narrow range be- 
tween 53 and 56 or 57, and, sincc my 
broker thought (hat (he stock. was fully 
corrected anyway and was due for a rise, 
we bought 500 shares at 53. 

The stock rose to 5314 
backed down to 51. I should. € sold it 
and taken what would have been a 
51500 loss with commissions. If you are 
in a stock for a quick trade, you must 
k to your purpose and sell it if it 
doesn't work out. To buy a stock for one 
reason and then forget that reason will 
almost always land you in trouble. But I 
decided to hold to at least get even. The 
stock did rally to 5314, and it looked as 
though all might work out well after all. 
But it went no higher. One month after 
I had bought it, the stock was still 51. 
Nothing to be happy about, but not rad- 
ically alarming, either. 

‘Then it happened. In the first week of 
January 1962, the stock fell over four 
points in one day. Few were the people, 
even with stop-loss orders, who got the 
price they had expected, because there 
were no buyers on the way down. My 
broker advised me not to panic—the 
stock was bound to have a little rally aft 
er such a drop and we would take our 
bitter medi at a litle higher figure 
than 45, where it was a day later. But in- 
stead of even а slight come ithe 
stock conti 
later, to. 40% the ni 
the week after tha 
had made a terrible blunder. 


nd rhen 


It was no use—I 
We sold 
the 500 shares, some two months after 


Td bought them, at 3716. And thank 
heaven 1 waited no longer. Everyone 


knows what happened to Brunswick that 
усаг—й [ell 


as low as 1814. I have one 
friend bought Brunswick 
stock about the same time I did and de- 
cided to average out his price by buying 
more on the way down. He still has his 
shares, 1 believe; the stock on the day 1 
am writing this is selling for 8. What had 


who some 


been carmarked as a $500 profit for me 
ended up as a loss of $8188.11! 

OL course [ was sick about this terrible 
episode, and yet curiously 1 was not as 
deflated as might have been expected. 
Was I becoming inured to vast losses? 
No, but was so sure now of the incvita 
ble profitability of staying with the 
stocks my friends were buying that I was 
certain I could make back the losses of 
my stupid personal aberrations. 

What they were buying at the time— 
and what 1 therefore put my rema 
money imto—were four stocks: 


Holly 
Stores, a discount-store chain whose stock 


naded on the American Exchange: 
Horizon Land, an over-the-counter 
glamor issue that had skyrocketed [rom 
SI a share to 515 a share on the 
prospect of huge profits selling land 
in the West trough mailorder ads; 
Midwestern Financial, one of the then 
booming savings-and-loan stocks, also on 
the American Exchange: and a fourth 
stock, SckRex, which J shall discuss 
shortly. 

Actually, all of these stocks could, in- 
deed, have made me the wealthy man 1 
envisioned myself as deserving to be- 
come, if—and what an ¿f—the market 
had continued to climb. 1 had mer my 
friends too late, at the very end, though 
I did not then know it, of course, of a 
Eveat bull marker. My only comfort, if 
you can call it that, is knowing that if 1 
had met them earlier and had made a 
great deal of money, I would probably 
have just Jost that much more in the 
crash of 1962 

What kept me from being wiped out 
altogether in that year of debacle is the 
fact that half the stocks—Horizon Land 
and SelRex—were bought over the 
counter. If they had been listed on an 
exchange, I would probably have bought 
them on margin and bought twice as 
much, which would have spelled my 
ruin a lot carlier than it eventually аз 
rived. Bui since 1 had paid full price for 
much of my stocks and they didn't [all 
to zero, I had some moncy left when the 
smoke cleared 

The first stock 10 be in trouble was 
Horizon Land. I bought 500 shares in 
October 1961, ai prices from. 1544 to 
1854. and E was naturally elated when by 
the end of the year the stock was already 
up to 28. Farly in 1962 it fell back to 20 
and hovered there for many months. 
When the clash came between President 
Kennedy and Roger. Blough of United 
States Sree! Р. 1962—the event that 
triggered the crash—the stock. plummet- 
ed to 13, 10, and by late Jame, 7. As soon 
as trouble started, however, 1 called my 
friend Wallace and he told me in a hur- 
ried telephone call that he was, indeed, 
selling some of his Horizon Land, but 
only because he had to raise cash—and I 
knew how heavily margined he was, so 
that any sizable drop in the market ne- 
cessitated drastic action. He told mc the 


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J 


company's situation was as good 
1 remporized and sold 100 sh 
1814, and held the rest. My broker and 
my new friends all 1014 me this market 
was going to turn around soon. One 
would be a fool to sell out ar the bot- 
tom, They were too young and too 
inexperienced to have lived through a 
terrible bear market, My broker, who 
seemed utterly Jost through this whole 
period, no help at all. The remaining 
100 shares of Horizon Land were even- 
tually sold for 634. for another tremen: 
most S5000. 

Holly Stores repeated this unhappy 
pattern. My friends were bw so 
1 bought 500 shares late in 1061 at an 
e price of 17. Within two weeks, 
the stock. was п it dropped and 
held for months at 19, at least not dip 
ping below the price 1 had paid for it 
until that Гас April. 1 finally sold 
Holly Stores in September 1062, at S6 а 
share, for a loss of $5684.93. 

Of Midwestern Financial I bought 
only 100 shares—but even so, in the same 
span of time, months when all savings 
anddoan stocks fell apart, 1 sullered a 
loss of $1475.06. The stock has not recov- 
ered to this day. 

But Sel-Rex was to prove the most 
costly of all Wallace's suggestions. 1 
bought 500 shares at $35 a share. To be 
able to purchase a round number of 
shares, 1 had to borrow money from my 
wife—money she had e 
ing before our first baby arrived. Thus 
far, I've not been able to pay her back. 

J watched the stock anxiously. In one 
week's time, it was up 10 3814. Wallace 
told me the 
end of the year—this w 
1962. The stock slipped back 10 35. 


dous loss—; 


d while work- 


stock would be 100 by the 
in February of 
but 


that was understandable; it had alr 
enjoyed a considerable rise beo) 
bought 


Then came the steel crisis in April, 
«lin a few days time the stock, drop- 
ping multiple points a day, was down to 
28, Wallace never called. me—if and 
when he sold it, I do not know. My 
broker, rightly not feeling he should re- 
veal the account of another client, could. 
only tell me Wallace was lightening hi 
portfolio. My broker, did not 
vise selling: instead, lie told me his bro- 
kerage house—which had a large position 
in the stock—was holding on. 


Through the whole period when 
stocks were plunging in 1962, those who 
held their stocks did so because they 


thought the market would turn. around 
soon, and that the wisest course was to 
sec it through. When you had losses such 
as E had, it was easy to sigh and say, as I 
heard many say, "Ics not really a loss till. 
you sell it. Just wait, these things come 


back in time." Maybe they do—if. you 
have bought General Motors or Eastman 
Kodak, But not a Horizon Land or a 
Sel-Rex, 


I sold my Sel-Rex at an average price 


of 1154. At least 1 could take the 55000 
or so that was left of that pai 

vestment and, buying on m 
enough buying power to hope for some 
renaissance in my fortunes as the market 
ged its rally. My loss in Sel-Rex was 
$11,700. My loss in the four stocks of 
that year was abot .000. 1 had about 
516.000 left—and I was again looking for 
а broker. 


This time he was easy to select. A few 
months after | had bought Sel-Rex, I no- 


ticed an advertisement in the. Sunday 
New York Times placed by a very 
prominent and conservative brokerage 


house ойе 


g à brochure on that. very 
any, they said, with a 
remarkable earnings potential. Natural 
Jy. I sem in my name, thinking I might 
s well see what another firm was saying 
bout my stock and encouraged, too, 
that a brokerage house as reputable 


this one was also touting the issue 
The report was rubber-stamped with the 
name of one of their custom cn. In. 


a dew days. as expected, he telephoned 

I told him frankly that 1 was happy 
with my present broker, which was rela- 
tively crue at that time, and that 1 had 
written in only because alrcady a 
shareholder in Хе ех 
said he knew he should 
own firms recommend but he 
would advise my selling Sel-Rex. Later 
on, he was to look like the only savant 
in a world of wal ignorance 

He called twice again. just to chat, һе 
id. and he never pressured me to 
sich my account. He seemed just to 
njoy talking to anyone about stocks, as 
much as 1 did myself, and he spoke 
calmly and. intelligently. The President 
Kennedy-Big. Steel allair spurred him 10 
take all his clients out of the market and, 
soon, to begin selling short. He was com- 
pletely bearish when everyone else was 
expecting an carly turnaround. He 
urged me to take my losses and, if I 
didn't short, do put my 
money in 

When all my stocks had hit bottom 
and were lying there like skewered bal 
loons and I realize my broker had been 
а complete cipher through the whole 
re. Tuned to the one man 
who had talked sense to me, on three oc- 
sions in the past six months. 
We met for the first time, and E found 
im to be in his mid 305, Europe 
intense and obviously very intelligent. a 
man who had been in business until the 
last few years but for whom the lure of 
the market had been too strong 10 resist. 
His Cather —or was it his steplatherz-— had 
been а broker for years, so that he was 
no novice to the ways of Wall Street 
After lunch he took me to his offices and 
showed me huge charts he kept charts 
so big they unrolled over two desks—and 
vied to explain to me why he felt the 


ge his 


want go sell 


bonds. 


1 of terror. 


п born, 


serious trouble for a good 
long time to come. That opinion proved 
to underlie my next misfortune: When 
he was right to be bearish, he wasn't my 
broker; and when he became my brok 
he was wrong to be bearish, For the 
ket was then very near its boom; and 
while stocks were larking through one of 
the most glorious upsurges in history 
wl offering one of the best opportuni- 
ties to buy cheap and watch fortunes 
grow, I was hesitant and defensive, 

My new broker's first pessimistic ad- 
vice was to sell my Kerr-McGee and Holly 
Stores stocks before they dropped fur- 
ther and put my money in Consolidated 
Edison bonds. We'd wait out the be 
market, if it took years. When it be- 


market was ii 


сате obvious that a run-up was under 
way due that year—alter President 
Kennedy's successful showdown with 
Rusia over the Cuban missile bases— 


my broker, admitting there might be 
some profit on the upside, sold the 
bonds (at a slight loss) and started buy- 
ing common Stocks—but hesitatingly, 
timidly, always ready to retreat. In the 11 
months that 1 stayed with that broker, he 
made 13 trades for me and he lost money 
in every one—except one stock that was 
entirely my own suggestion and that he 
advised mc to sell at a loss but that I iu- 
sisted we hold onto, and then we made 
a profit of less than one point a sh: 
(One year later that stock, National Air 
lines, had doubled. 1 had had 600 shares; 
an three years 1t would have been worth 
six times as much.) 

I was in Chicago on business for four 
days when he tried something in my ab- 
sence (he had discretionary power with 

count) that I had never dabbled i 
trade. At that time, if you 
owned 5 ics, you could buy 
another $5000 worth of any stock in the 
morning and wait till the end of the 
trading day to decide if you wanted to 
sell your present hokling in order to pay 
for what you bought that morning. or 
whether you would sell back your morn- 
ings purchase. This allowed you to gar 


ble on a one-day trade, to make money 
on a stock that spuried ahead five or te 
percent in one day witha 10 


sell any of your present portfolio or put 
up any additional cash (though you must 
рау commissions, of course). 

When I called my broker the morning 
of my return from Chicago, he infor 
me with a frantically penitential а 
he had tried a day trade for me and tha 
it had failed. He had gone short Un 
States Smelting in the morning: w 
covered that afternoon and та 
of $402. The very next day, U.S. Smelt 
ing fell 11 points! He had been right, 
but hi off by one day. We 
decided to never again рш my account 
in the pos ng to close a trade 
on the same day: If there was enou 
buying power in the account to hold the 
stock for a day or two, it might be worth 


“Oh, Pm very philosophical—Lve got to be.” 


after all, he had called the 


uying ag: 


Smelting bubble with almost perfect 
accuracy. 
So when, a few days Inter, he w 


Jong 100 shares of Beckman Instr 
le and it didi 


ad, the stock 
ick drop, and my broke 
of all the losses he had already 
n in my account, didn't sell. There I 
was, again holding a weakening stock. 
The discus went on daily 
about Beckman Instruments between mc 
and my broker and. between me and the 
charts 1 started keeping on the stock, 
nd between me and my wife and any 
friend who was the least bit interested i 
the market, consumed hours. Resistance 
points were mapped—there was one at 
and once the stock hit that point it 
would probably bounce back to 97, said 
the charts, and we would get out there. 
It didn't work—the stock fell through 92 
as if it had never read из own chart. 
Beckman fell to 83 before I finally got 
out of it, Гог a loss, this time, of 51991. It 


tly. Inst 


then fell further, only to spurt all the 
way back to 102 and plunge once more, 
this time (o as low as 4712. 1 had 
learned: (1) the dangers of day trades 


id (2) de gers of day trades that 
turn out not to be day trades. In fact, 
with this broker I was learning the dan- 
gers of wading ahogether: If you are 
right even half of the time, you can casi- 
ly lose money, because if you buy a stock 
at 50 and sell it at 55, you've made 4 
points; but if you buy it at 50 and sell it 
at 45, you've lost 6 points. The commis- 


And most 
time. The 


sion will foil you every time. 
people aren't right half the 
only way to make money trading is to 
cut your losses immed nd Jet you 
profits run. But the tradinz broker (and 
since an investor can't sit and watch the 
ipe all day, he usually has to let hi 
broker make trading decisions for him) 
seldom lets anything run: it’s not the 
way he looks at the market he's in 
nd out of everything fast. I's great for 
his commissions, but the investor finds his 
wins aren't big enough to cover his losses, 
nd if ther of losses, he’s soo 
out of the gam 
1 suppose 1 should have left this bro- 
ker then and there, but E certainly had ne 
one else to turn to, and J decided 1 
would just have to uy io take a gre 
part in making all decisions. 1 could 
do much worse than the professionals had 
done thus far, 
My broker, apparently also at his wi 
ıl—for he was doing no better for his 
clients than he was for me had 
found what he began t0 tout as а savior 
in the form of a weekly market letter of 
uncanny accuracy. Someone in his office 
had come across this new service and 
my broker had started 10 read it and 
then he began to read it to me. The 
service recommended Creole Petroleum 
xd it immediately shot up four points. 
Je then touted Pyle National and that 
moved up sharply. My broker asked me 
I would share the expense of subscrib- 
ing to this service—and not just the 
weekly letter but the unlimited privilege 
of calling the service's offices for up-to- 
the-minute advice. 1 agreed (o pay 
third of the expense on а monthly basis 


215 


PLAYBOY 


until we saw how it worked out. 
The wizard who ran this service had a 
select group of "wonder stocks" 
would astound everyone. Eastman Ko- 
dak was one of them; he predicted 
price of 300 for EK within a [ew y 
time (and, adjusting for stock splits, he 
may prove correct). 1 liked the idea of 
owning a blue chip for a change; fur 
thermore, according to our advisor, this 
was a blue chip with glamor potential 
My broker called me one day in Ma 
say that Eastman Kodak had gone up 
four points on heavy volume to break 
out of x" and that he had bought 
me 100 shares at 12014. The very next 
day the stock fell back a handful of 
points and it didn’t reach 121 again un- 
the end of the year, which points out 
one of the grave dangers of the chartists 
nd Darvasites—breakouts can be most 
deceptive. Chartists can jump into a 
stock because their readings indicate a 


rise, bur if the public doesn't. follow 
through. the market as a whole, for 


example, decides to drift. down—the 
stock. can fall back sharply. 

Others of the gurus wonders to 
watch at that moment were the su 
stocks, particularly South Puerto Rico 
Sugar on the big board. It is true that, 
with Cuba's sugar production. going to 
ruin under Castro's regime, sugar was 
e on the world m. ind 


as sugar prices went up, so did the prices 
of the stocks of sugar refineries and pro- 
ducers. 1 soon owned 200 shares of South 
Puerto Rico Sugar, at 4514 

At first the stock acted well, rising 
steadily. It was certainly more volatile 
any T had ever owned. A ship load- 
would go down in a storm 
in the Pacific—never mind whose compa 
ny was involved—and the stock would go 
up three points in anticipation of world 
shortages. For a while I had a nice little 
paper profit. Then trouble started in 
Haiti—a revolution against the dictator 
Duvalier. E hadn't the slightest notion 
that a company with Puerto Rico in its 
ic got most of its sugar [rom H 
but apparently such was the case, 
the company’s cane fields were in danger 
of fire or confiscution. Added to that 
were statements. of our Government, 
worried about a growing panic and 
hoarding of sugar, that we had plenty of 
sugar in our warehouses and that house- 
wives could stop worrying. А Congres- 
sional investigation. was in the offing, it 
ed, to see if prices were 
ied. The world sug- 
ge Everyone was wailing about 
onc week carlicr suddenly disappeared. 
Sugar companies in various parts of the 
country began to lower their prices to 
the consumer. South Puerto Rico Sugar 
plummeted to 33. And Fasuman Kodak, 
slipped now to 109, didn't help, either. I 
ıgin call come up with 
000 or we sell. Disgusted, I threw in 


was 
b: 
ar shor 


announ 


wa 


received a m 
Š: 


216 the towel. 1 told my broker I was leaving 


him for someone else. He told me—as 
every broker but the first had told me— 
that he didn't blame me. 

When I settled in with a new broke 
the first thing he did was sell the sugar 
stock, for а loss of 51925, and the East- 
man Kodak, for a los of $1322. He 
wanted 10 start afresh, These were losses 
piled on top of those in Beckman Instru- 
ments and the other ill-judged. trades. 1 
realized to my horror that my Sel-Rex 
friends and their broker had left me with 
516,000, but that I now had only 58000 
left. In a surging bull market, in a s 
of months, 1 had lost half of my rem 
ing money. 


1 realized that I was by now terrified 
of the stock market. But 1 couldn't walk 
away from it—T had to try to redeem my 
sell, my lost money and my lost. pride. 
But being afraid, my natural instinct 
was to get into the market and steal a 
few dollars quietly before the market 
would catch up with me and take every- 
thing away again. In concrete terms, 1 
wanted to trade again. 1 was fearful of 
long-term commitments—they all seemed 
to end in bigger and bigger losses—and I 
in't the patience to wait years for 
turnabouts, if, indeed, they would ever 
materialize. 1 also realized that 1 had so 
many losses that I could take short-term 
gains for years 

Increasingly interested in the techni- 
cal approach, and realizing that my 
charts had always been a farce, too busy 
to keep better ones or to learn a system 
like the point-and-figure theories, and 
seeing no reason why someone who 
spent full time at it couldn't do better 
than myself in any case, I soon was in 


the hands of a new broker purported to 
be an expert chartist. This man wrote a 
weekly technic ket letter 


for his broke Hed him 
about my problems with South Puerto 
Rico Sugar and Eastman Kodak. 1 found 
that he had, indeed, waded in the form 
profitably, but had been out of the stock 
for some time, and that though he liked 
man Kodak, he would never have 
t 1 paid for it, Our telephone 
versation brought out that he was a 
ker as well as an analyst, a member 
of a group of prominent Wall Sur 
technicians, a contributor to a rece 
thology of sophisticated analytical w 
dom. Í asked if I could see him. 

1 found him to be a young man, in his 
сапу 305, obviously bright and terribly 
serious about the market, His firm һай 
given him his own room, where he sat 
and watched the tape on a televisionlike 
screen. He never ate lunch out and sel- 
dom left the company’s offices. He had 
ken one vacation in four years or so, 
nd then had his charis flown (o him 

ly. He left the office shortly after the 
1's closing every day, but only to 
1 and study at home. He came in every 
Saturday to write his market letter 


He shook his head with real sympathy 
over the sad narrative I unfolded. He 
seemed moved by my true tale of woe 
He told me that an older woman had 
come to him recently with a similar story 


and he had refused ıo handle he 

count; he couldn't stand the responsibil- 
ity if she, through his fault, failed once 
again. But I was younger, more resilient. 


He thought my only hope was through 
shorrierm trading. and that in a good 
year he could make me 50 percent on my 
money—or even more. But there would 
be losses, too—and there would be stocks 
that тозе much higher alter we sold them. 
That was the way a wader worked—to 
cut losses quickly and to get as much 
profit on the upside as one could reason- 
bly expect without enduring a reversal. 
эпе thing 1 can promise you," he said. 
You'll never ride a stock down and lose 
as much money as you did in Brunswick 
and Beckman. 

With some uepidation—what 1 was 
doing now seemed more openly like 
mbling than anything 1 had done be 
fore—I signed the margin papers. My new 
broker said he understood that if 1 lost 
51000 with him, I would lcave hi He 
suid he would at first be overly cautious: 
—to let us ny to get a few dollars’ profit 
under our belt. 

He was not particularly cautious, bur 
he did nor need to be. 1 had come to 
him at a time when the market had 
dipped and was just starting 10 turn 
ound with genuine velocity. It was a 
perfect trader’s market. My money was 
turning over so fast I couldn't keep up 
with it. At the end of a day I was cursing 
the downturn in a stock I had bought a 
dew days before, only to learn from a 
brokerage-house notice in the mail that T 
no longer owned it. This was the action 
I loved, though Т would get exceedingly 
upset when a stock I had. just sold con- 
tinued (o rise sharply. 

My first day with this broker was Sep- 
tember 5, 1963. On that day he sold 
everything 1 had brought 10 him so that 
he could start with a tabula rasa and 
cash. The Eastman Kodak he sold was 
later to rise to a price that would have 
more than doubled money if 1 had 
held it. 

Things started well. He bought 200 
shares of Texas Instruments at 76, and. 
ten days later he sold them at 8214; I 
had made a profit of just over $1000! 
This was my first profu for what had 
scemed to me an eternity: I went to 
Dunhill's and sent him a $25 pipe. 

The same day he sold Texas Instr 
bought 600 shares of High 
we Engineering at 35 and 3514, 
as he called me to relate with re- 
ned pride—he also made a successful 
trade. He bought and sold on the 
same day 400 shares of Mueller Brass, 
for a $350 profit. One day later the High 
Volge Engineering was sold at 3734. 
Profit: 5982! This was fantastic! In a 


Volt 
and- 


“That was great —! Now could you hold it for 
just one more, please?!” 


217 


PLAYBOY 


218 


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couple of weeks I had made охе 
cent on the capital E had br 


per- 
ht to him 
My broker modestly said E had hit upon 
an extremely lucky period—it couldn't 
possibly мау that way. But he 
pleased, too. 

My next trade was a озін Bell & 
Howell. But he held the stock only three 
days and kept the loss 
(though it was S58 


was 


half a point 
in dollars); this par- 
ticularly burt, because High Voltage En- 
gineering continued to climb and in 
four weeks’ time was 51. But the Bell & 
Howell loss was quickly canceled by an 
equal gain in Eversharp. a stock he held 
for what was then a record 1 days. He 
took а 5600 los in Crown Cork X Seal. 
but then he bought 1000 shares of Tech- 
nicolor at 1714. and he sold them 14 
days later at 20, for a profit of 52173! 

My profit with this magician in a little 
less than six weeks’ time was almost 
S4000! 1 had made 30 percent on my 
money in a month and a half! My eli- 
tion knew no bounds. At this rate, there. 
was по ceiling to my hopes. 


When he called to tell me he had 
bought 1000 shares of Cine he 
added, “1 think we're really going to 
make a killing on this one.” Somehow T 
wished he hadn't said that. Pd heard it 
too often. before. It boded ill 
The first day or two, the stock 
well. We bought it at 1614: within a 
Few days. it 1714. We could 
have had a S900 profit. But that could 
hardly be called “a killing." Then the 
stock ked down to 16. But it had had. 
a good climb and needed a rest. No rea- 
son to worry about it. Then it dropped 
to the 15s, Fifteen was the support area 
on the charts, If it held there, it should 
be OK. And it held beautifully for 
weeks, touching 16. then dropping back, 
but never breaking 15. There was good 


ted 


went 10 


news about the company. I's a Mad, 
Mad, Mad, Mad World was to open 
soon; Vari had already reviewed it 
wb said it should be a tremendous 


money-maker. What more encouragement 
did we need? How the West Way Won 
wits already doing a great business at the 
box office. Other films were being shot— 
a Samuel Bronston picture in Spain, and 
Bronston was riding high since the suc- 
cess of El Cid and 55 Days in Peki 
al The Greatest Stary Ever Told, onc 
of the biggest movies ever filmed, wa 
going to be released frst in Cinerams 
The number of Cine heaters ha 
increased Irom 24 in 19 
to 83 in 1961, to 
wb expansion was continuing, 
duding mobile units for showing i 
rope and drive-in theater 
The company had made only 13 cents 
share in 1062, but for 1963 there were 
estimates of SI or more a share, with 
glowing prospects for the years beyond 
| A New York Stock Exchange brc 
| house (later expelled from the Natio: 


d 
to 47 in 1960, 
9 at the end of 1962 


equipme 


Association of Securities Dealers Jor 
manipulating prices on another stock) is 
sued a four-page report assuring inves 


tors that the foundation was now laid 


"or a firm earnings base from which 
curent dreams can be wranslated. into 
reality.” and advised purchase of the 


stock “for potentially rewarding capital 
gains.” The fundamentals, said my bro- 
Ker, were as impressive as the charts 

Mad, Mad, Mad 
in November 196: 
unanimously favorable, Even The 
Yorker liked. it But when Stinley Krit 
mer. the producer, flew the pres out for 
а big premiere in Hollywood. it cost so 
much money (a quarter of a million dol- 
lars) that Variety and even the daily 
press and the United Srares Senate ques- 
tioned the need for such extravagance. 
Cinerama stock reacted by falling to 
11. Should we sell? Normally, my bro 
ker would have been out of the stock 
automitically—he had never failed to 
sell a falling stock long belore the loss 
was this big Rut he said fundame 
had convinced him that the stock wes 
good, that we should hold 

Cinerama went above 15 
broker called me and, in a di 
but pleased tone, told me how 
went through 15, what should now have 


reasonable expec 
stock fell below 15 
It had happened before 
recovered. But this time it did 
recover. Instead, it fell to 1%. 

I was again at that point when panic 
about a loss brings to mind every reason 
to hold on. After all. 1 had lost mor 
on Beckman and а month 1 
climbed back to what I had. paid for it. 
So had South Puerto Rico Su 
so many stocks, Сіпегапа wi 
company that was doing well I re 
hearsed in my mind the ways in which 
was doing well. T developed y 
kind of mystic belief in its f D went 
to scc Mad, Mad World and found. I 
was most impresed with the new Cine 
rama process. in which no scams showed 
between the three screens. They had a 
great thing here. Why be a stupid trad- 
cr? Why give back more money than 1 
le with this broker 
the $8000 I h; 
to him? 1 would hold ou and be patient, 
and my broker agreed with me 

Then came an announcement fom 
the company that iis. president, Nicolas 
Кеййн. had gone to England and had 
come back with a gre w British in- 
vention, Called Тесла, it was a camera 
d recorder that would allow you to 
e home “movies” of your family on 
tape and play the tape back immedia 
on your television screen; or filu 
program you wanted 10 preserve on tape 

y ar your whim; or film a pro 


The 


Bur 
nd 
not 


guin. 


why worr 


gram while you were out so you could 
watch it at your leisure: or even film one 
channel's show while you were wa 
а different channel. Ampex had rece! 
come out with a home instrument that 
would do these things, but the cheapest 
Ampex recorder was 511,900. The Tel- 
an recorder would sell for under $300. 
(The camera, for home filming, would 
be about $150.) It was already being test- 
marketed in Great Britain. Reisini had 
grabbed American rights, This could be 
the greatest thing since the phonograph. 
Eventually every home would have one, 
with a library of video tapes the way 
homes now have records. Time reported 
on the new invention enthusiastically. 

Cinerama started to r 
overjoyed. But something went wrong. A 
press demonstration of the instrument 
proved unsatisfactory, and the stock fell, 
this time below 13. But Telcan was to 
remain a new false hope for me to de- 
lude myself. with. 

The Friday President Kennedy was 
shot, the stock, like all stocks that day, 
dropped » minutes. The 
day closed with Cinerama at 10м. I 
was panicked. That weekend I had to fly 
to the West Coast on business, and Mon- 
day the exchange was closed, The first 
thing I did Tuesday morning was go to 
the brokerage office in the hotel and 
check the market. It was skyrocketing. 
By 12:30 in California, the New York 
market was closed; the Dow-Jones was 
up 32.03 points. Cincrama was back up 
All would yet work out. 

Then came weeks of drifting on low 
volume, an almost imperceptible falling 
ay. The gradualness of it lulled me 
into complacency: Who sells a stock be- 
cause its fallen V4 of a point on low 


volum ally the stock was back down 
бо 1014, and ‘this time there was no 
Presidential assassination to n the 


weakness. And yet it seemed folly to sell 
now and lose so much money. At 1014 
I would be out 57000. This was so disas- 
wous I couldn't face it. Out of tens of 
thousands of dollars, I would be left 
with less than 54000. Cinerama must be 
near the bottom by now. Besides, there 
was а new hope. 

The company had been working on 
Telan. A friend of my broker's, who in 
turn had a friend highly placed in Cine- 
rama, let it be known that negotiations. 
were almost completed with a major 
concern that would make and distribute 
the camera. That company was Philco. 
Philco! The rumor got around. Within 
three days the stock shot up from 1014 
to 1314. There was no reason to sell on 
strength like that. The rumor might well 
be true, and we waited. It proved false, 
md the stock fell back to 101 
‘Twice more this sume rumor was to 
spurt the stock higher—though it never 
went back to 13 again. Still, in an hour 
it would zo up a full point. My broke 
pointed out that the stock would drift 


down on low volume, but a liule g 
news and it shot up again on 
volume. Besides, three times 
bounded away from 10. That looked 
а firm resistance level. We would just 
wait till a deal came through on Telcan 
and all would be well. 

Then came the day I remember so 
dearly. On Friday, April 24. 1961, I 
had lunch with a good friend and took а 
Jule walk afterward for my routine look 
in a brokerageoffce window, one of 
those in rhe neighborhood that kept 
Cincrama on the board. The stock was 
74. 1 could not believe it. 1 had. never 
seen only one numeral before the frac- 


know what ied 
He had been telling me that 
weakness in the stock was at least par 
tially attributable 10 rumors that the com- 
pany was in financial difheulty, but 
nothing definite had come out. 

That weekend I was really frightened. 
1 called my old “friend” who had got me 
into ScLRex and all the other great 
growth stocks that had cost me so much 
money. He said he just didn't like Cin 
rama and thought I ought to get out. but 
he had no concrete reason for saying so 

That Monday (April 27) Ginera 
quietly gained 14 and closed at 97%. 
the end of the week, rising a little 
falling back a little more, it closed at 
954. Then, on the following Monday 
(May 4), the market rallied sharply from 
he ol the two previous w nd 
Cinerama, too, acted encouragingly. H 
rose as high as 1034 and closed at 10. Out 
of d in' The action of the las 
few days could be the washout needed 
to turn the stock around. 

Tuesday, Мау 5, was an amazing day. 
I had been invited to the opening of the 
nited States Pavilion at the New York 
nd the highlight of that 
as a special movie provided by 
erama. I had not intended to go. but 
with the stock so precarious, I decided 1 
might talk to a company official who 
could be helpful. Tuesday morning 1 
called Cinerama and asked if it were too 
late to attend. nly not. An admis- 
sion ticket was sent to my office by special 
messenger. The showing of the film was 
to be after lunch. When 1 left my office, 
Cinerama was below 10 

When 1 got to the United States P: 
xilion, I milled about with the other 
guests, looking for someone who might 
be useful. Finally 1 recognized. Wil 
R. Forman, who had replaced. Reisin 
president ar the end of 1963. I walked. 
over in his direction, impressed with the 
tall grace of the тан, with his dis 
hed looks and quiet, responsible 
manner. When | had sidled nest to him, 
1 overheard him talking to another man 
while both were eating sandwiches pre 
ared for the press and other guests. He 
saying: “1 don't know what to do. 
I've worked every hour at this thing and 


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I can't seem to work it out. I don't know 
what more I can do.” 1 could cuch no 
more, bur it was enough to be frighten 
wr. He seemed distressed, but for all I 
knew, he could have been talking about 
a charity drive or crab grass on his lawn. 

I decided to approach him and inuo- 
duce myself, He put down his drink and 
sandwich to shake hands, and we had a 
file talk. He was most gracious. E told 
him 1 owned 1000 shares of his compa 
пух stack and was experiencing sleepless 
lus. He shook his head and said he 
knew it was terribly distressing, but that 
he couldn't understand why there was 
this weakness in the stock. 1 asked him 
about Telcin, He said he hoped to have 
some very good news im about tw. 
weeks. | asked him when the earnings 
report for the previous year would be 
out and he sud he had spent Sunday 
with the accounts and he thought 1 
figures would be ready in the same two 
weeks, I asked him some questions about 
the two different € processes, 
one with one Gime: ı three. He 
told me that The Greatest Story Ever 
Told would definitely appear in Cine 
rama, though they just hadit made up 
ch process to use, And 
that was that. Others сате to demand 
his auention. | was impressed by his 
dignity: he certainly seemed no petty 
opernor to me. ШП, he was obviously 
troubled, and 1 couldn't help dwelling 
on what Fd overheard just before our 
comersation. 

Before I left the luncheon hall I had. 
met another man who was an official in 
the company. He was friendly and pleas 
kind enough ло sa 


w 


should call him if 1 had any questions, 
i 


ai all his friends did the same 
The show was a good one and 1 got 
k 10 the office just as the market was 
closing. Cinerama ended that day at 914 
oll 34 on the day. another new low. 
The next day the stock didn't do 
much. H closed at 954. up 14 on the 
Ë The next morning 1 
1 met at the show 
what Mr. Forma 
that there 


told me t 
said was indeed true, 


had 
would be good news soon on Telan, 
that there was no real reason the stock 


should be falling the way it had. 
The stock was weak all week, and 
by Thursday had dropped to 1 


learned this from my broker, who called 
10 tell me that a partner in his firm had 
had à 
go short on Cinerama immed 
reason: He had it from a 
ble source thar Cinerama was going to 
file Chapter 1 that afternoon. The com. 
pany was going bankrupt! My God, 
what to doz My broker said calmly, r: 
tionally, maybe we should sell some 

id Td call him back in a few 
I called my new friend at Cine 
таша. He said he had heard the rumors 


» unimpeach- 


220 and they were absurd. Hold on, he ad- 


vised. My broker, meanwhile, called his 
friend who had a contact at the compa- 
ny and he got the same story. And the 
partner in the brokerage hum—one of 
the privileges of being a parmer—was 
able to place а call to Cinerama and ask 
for a statement. He, in turn, got his flat 
denial. We decided to wait and see what 
would happen. At опе point the stock 
rallied above 9 again, but it closed at 834. 
1 was now below my margin level. ‘The 
tation was desperate 

The nest day, Friday. The Wall Street 
Journal, commenting on the weakness in 
Cinerama on heavy volume (it was the 
most active stock on the Ame x- 
change on Thursday), said it was duc 10 
rumors on the иге that the Bank of 
America was calling in a loan to the 


ican 


company. No one ble to. evaluate 
the truth of the rumors; they could very 
well prove correct. The stock opened at 
Sin My broker didn't know what to 
do. 1 had a business appointment at 11 
and went to it in a nervous daze. I called 
лу broker from the offices 1 was visiti 


The exchange had stopped. (+ 
Cinerama at 814; There were 1 
sell orders for the specialists 10 handle. 

cur my business short and rushed, trem 
bling, to the nearest brokerage office. A 
few minutes after I arrived. wading was 
resumed in the stock—at 734. It went to 
few shorts were covering. per- 
haps—then back to 754. Then down. 1 
called my broker. Again he said, w 
The stock wasy Такана I w 
completely wiped out—after paying back 
the 56500 I owed on margin and pav 
commissions, 1 would be left with about 
$500, 1 went back to my office. Know 
it was pointless, bur desperate to 
something, I called my new friend ag; 
He was in conference—as well he mi 
ic—but while I was speaking to hi 
tary. my broker called on the other linc. 
X flash had just gone out on the rape: 
The president of the Bank of. America. 
announced that Cinerama did not even 
have a loan with the bank! Forman 
himself did, indeed, have such a loai 
but the bank denies 1 
was being called in. Fu 
заре carried an announcement from For- 
man: He did not understand the recent 
volume ma. The earnings re 
port would be out shortly and there 
would be no “material change" from the 
previous year (the onceexpected. SI per 
share earnings. proved. wholly. chimeri- 
cal). The stock immediately shot to 815. 
1 will never forget the surge of relief 
and the joy E felt on h that news. 1 
felt as а condemned ma мм feel when 
he hears of his reprieve. 1 hung up on 
my broker and related the news excitedly 
10 the secretary still waiting on the other 
line. But the stock didn’t hold at Bı 
Tt closed that amazing Friday at 774. 


1%—: 


The margin clerk of my brokerage 
house had still not issued а L But 
that weekend was another experience in 


torture. | could think of nothing but 
Cinerama. A dearly loved cousin. from 
California came to visit, but 1 could 


hardly be civil to her, so engrossed were 
my thoughts. On Sunday I called a friend 
who had been associated with the film 
industry fe told me he had 


yes: he 


heard nothing adverse about. Cincrama 
in the trade: Paramount would, indeed. 
release Bronston's Circus World in June 


and United Artists was committed to do 
The Greatest Story in Cinerama. Maybe 
the stock was a goad buy, he suggested. 
On Monday moming 1 called. my 
friend at the company. He told me there 
а board meeting in 90 minutes and 
1 have to run. Bur there would be 
good news. There was going 10 be new 


financing. So there way something wrong 
with the company! That was the first 
time hed admiued (han Sul maybe 


good news was forthcoming 

The newspapers had carried the story 
of the Bank of America’s and Form: 
Устен and the stock opened buoy 
jı on Monday morning. up 32. at St, 
still hope. It went up to 854. 
dropped back to 814 and stayed there. E 
knew the price because E kept calling my 
broker and running down 10 a brokerage 
ollie on another Moor in my building. Ac 
about 2:45 1 checked again: still 81, 
Thank God. At about four | dropped 


There wa 


down to the brokerage office again to sec 
where it had closed. 1 couldn't believe 
i352 d had fallen almost а point in 
the last half hour of trading! Another 


new low. Again, pa 

I couldn't work. 1 lelt the office, desper 
ate to do something to save what little 
money was leh and. still unable ro ad 
mit defeat. In my desperation, 1 walked 
to the building where Cinerama has its 
offices. at 575 Lexington Avenue, only a 
few blocks from where I work. I took the 
elevator to the top floor. It was after 
fivc. but ionist was still on duty. 
1 smiled А just come to ste 
if the furniture was still there. (1 was dis- 
ıressed to see thar the paint was flaking 
from the walls.) When she asked what I 
meant, D told her that 1 was a stockhold 
er who was concerned about the state of 
the company and was there 
ob the company 1 could talk toe 


pleasantly said 1 would have to 
ihe morning: she was sure someon 
would speak to me then. 1 stalled. r 


pamphlet lying on the table in the re 
ception area. and waited. When T saw 

welldressed man leave an inner office 
and go toward the elevator, I decided to 


follow him and speak to him. But he 
held the elevator door for a co-worker 
who soon followed after him, and we 


three entered the 
The well-dressed m: 


selfservice elevator 
n took hold of the 
other man by the lapels and said some- 
thing like this, in a low voice: 

Look. we've got 10 pay that bill. The 
vice-president of their company called me 
tod ughing matter anymore 


"The other man replied: "You know I 
can't issue any checks—treasurer's orders.” 
But this is serious. We've got to pay 
them.” 

“Look, he [Forman, I 


suppose] is 


we of all of it, he knows all the 
problems 
We hit the ground floor and the 


elevator ride was over, but I certainly 
had found out something—this was 
company in trouble! 

1 walked all the way home, trying to 
think calmly. Was there anyone whose 
advice 1 could ask? I decided ло call my 
first broker (Would that I had never left 
him!). He was very nice. His firm had 
bought into Cinerama when it was 4, and 
got out in the teens. Is a company with 
nothing but ""junk"—thar was the word 
he used. Ht was one of those crazy stocks 
that fly up, Пу down, and never go back 
again. We all make mistakes and 1 had 
made one. Get out of it. What would 


happen if the company did file a Chapter 
11, I asked. Well. Compudyne had done 
hat; it was now But Forman had 


bought more C stock just a few 
months before and had so many of his 
own millions in the company. Well, For- 
man could be a fool, too. The president 
of Compudyne had done the same thing. 

The next morning I took the subway 
to my broker's office in Wall Street and. 
was waiting for him when he came in 
shortly before ten. He wasn’t sleeping 

Ins, either, at kast be wanted to give 
that impression, He had put five 


me 
people besides myself in this stock. Cine 


а opened (I was afraid it wouldn't) at 
Тм. 1 told him what my fist broker 
1 said. My current broker said he'd 
looking at (he charts and 
ation of a selloff. There probably 
would be a turnaround in the stock, if 
the company stayed solvent, but it could 
be at the 5 who ki 


iw no 
ind 


about 5 level, w 
Should we sell, then? Well, there was 
still the president's letter to the stock 
holders that was supposed to go out dur- 
ing this week. It wouldn't help. much, 
but it might help some. We agreed to do 
this: I would scrape up enough. money 
my margin call (a check with the 
margin clerk informed us that he would 
settle for $1100 for the moment) and get 
out if the stock fell below 714. Just get 
out at that point, no fooling around. 
Why wait at all? If the stock held at the 
present level, the letter might give us a 
better price at which to sell out. 

The stock rallied sligl throughout 
the remainder of the week, r ша 
high of 814 on Wednesday, and closed 
on Friday at 7%. 

On Monday, May 18, 
and held even thro 
though the m 
If we could only hold at this level until 
some good news came. 

I did two things that Tuesday: One 
was to withdraw $1400 from my savings 


to me 


opened at 7% 


account, money saved for urgent matters 
that would have to be returned in a few 
months. Good. news had to come soon. 

The other thing | did w 
lunch with the Cinerama 
met at the Worlds Fair. 
capable, intelligent man, 
honest with me as he could be 


man 
He 


was a 
always as 
He told 
me the company was definitely not going 


bankrupt, that new financing would be 
forthcoming. Mr. Forman was worth in 
excess of $100,000,000 and there was no 
fear of collapse. Forman’s leuer to the 
stockholders was prepared and would 
definitely go out thar week. I couldn't 
sce а copy, of course, but й was а strong 
letter, explainîng why the company lost 
money for the year—an Sé-pershare loss 
instead of the Sl-pershare profit I had 
once expecied—largely a matter of over- 
extending by supplying Cinerama equip- 
ment to too many theaters, plus 
losses in The Wonderful World of the 
Brothers Grimm and a lessthan-favor- 
able deal with United Artists that was 
netting them less than should have ac 
crutd from dfs п Mad, Mad, Mad, 
Mad. World. The letter would sound an 


new 


optimistic note. The Telcan de 
looked good; now General Elect 
considering manufacturing and market 
ing the product. Their board of directors 
was scheduled to meet on it i 


1a few d 


vom what he said, it seemed sensible 10 
гү to hold on а few more days and see 
how things came out. There was still a 
chance of a turnaround. 

The next day, Wednesday, the stock 
drifted down on medium volume, but 
with no great pressure. It was 734 when 
I went to lunch, 714 after lunch and 
closed at 754. the same low it had closed 
at once before. E didn't like it—we were 

1% of a point from the low it had 
imraday cartier in the month and 
only 14 of a point from the spot where 
my broker and I agreed we had to sell. 
Suppose the stock dipped that 14 in thc 
moruing—or even opened 14 lower— 
should Í still hold until. Forman's letter 
the day? 


came out, presumably by late 
We needed just one days grace! 

1 also wildly considered borrowing 
money 10 be able to hold the stock, no 
matter where it fell to, just to avoid the 
reality of the final sale, the registered 


“You see people riding those things to work now who 
wouldn't have been caught dead on one five years ago.” 


221 


PLAYBOY 


222 Cl 


Joss. But that was insane, If the stock fell 
to 5 and I put up a total of $4000 to 
cover my margin requirements, 1 would 
be putting it into a stock worth only 
$5000 altogether. That, even I realized, 
would he too utterly stupid 


I resisted the temptation the next 
morning to drop down and see how the 
stock opened. 1 learned later that it 


opened at 754: when I did check it, at 
11:15. it was 714. Right at the line. If it 
would only hold there, maybe go up 14 
or be even for the day, I could wait and 
see what the derer would accomplis 
Not that 1 had any great expectations 
from a lener that could do no bener 
than explain loses, but it might bolster 
the stock in the 7s until new financing 
or Telcan approval came through. If. by 
some miracle, those actions should prove 
realities, we would be back in the run- 
ing: the stock might even be worth 
for the Jong pull. Maybe by the 
end of the уса the appearance of The 
Greatest Моту Ever Told would pull 
the stock back up above 10—and we 
could wait for a higher price а year hence. 

At 11:55 my broker called me. In the 
40 minutes that 1 had been back at my 
desk, the stock had fallen to 51 

1 couldn't believe him 
was it possible so quickly? But before I 
could absorb his news, he toll me we 
were out at 7. He said he had been able 
10 Call his floorman, have him at the 
proper post whe stock hit 714. 
and he got me out. He didn't know why 
it had collapsed that particular day, bui 
1 suppose Wall Street was expecting For- 
man’s lener to announce the achieve- 
ment of new financing, when all he 
could do was state he was still searching 
for new capital 

The stock rallied а bit to close at 554 
that day, and further rallied to close 
day at 614. It stayed in the low 6s for 
weeks, until a new false rumor of ap- 
proval of a loan quickly pushed it to Bt 
but in two or three days it plummeted 
to 6 again. On September 24. after all 
sources of longterm — financing—in- 
duding the Teamsters’ Union—failed 10 
materialize, Forman announced the com- 
pany would be forced to file 
seeking protection under C 
the Bankruptcy Act unless its creditors 
extended the maturity dates of their 
daims. The stock fell to 4 and was not 
allowed to trade the following day—the 
same day Forman abo announced that 
Cinerama had а loss of over $5,000,000 
for the first half of 1964 and that further 
"substantial loses are expected by year- 
end.” Reisini resigned as chairman of the 
board. Nottingham Elecironic Valve 
Company of Britain, which developed 
Tean, filed for voluntary liquidation, 
and Telcan has never been heard of since 
in Britain or the United States. Eventual- 
ly, Forman was able t0 obtain loans and 
guarantees substantial enough ro avoid 
pter 11 proceedings, but with the firm 


How 


the 


losing over $10,000,000 in the year. the 
stock couldn't hope to rally. It fell as 
low as 234 and closed the year 1964 
ightly above 3- mains as this 
üde is wrine 
When I had bought Cinerama, T had 
had almost $11,000 in the market. I paid 
1614 for the 1000 shares, sold them а 
7: with commissions, | was out a m 
$10,000. Interest charges over the eight 
months’ time had сом me an additional 
S261. Out of my original tens of thou- 
sands of dollars, I had $207.78 left. 


-where 


it 


My six and а hall years in the stock 
marker ended in such тога! disister that 1 
have never heard of anyone else endu 

ig anything similar. But 1 have heard, 
from friend after friend. tearful tales of 
rumors followed and sharp losses taki 
of special situations that turned out 
especially costly (I think of a friend, 
Ph.D. in math, who invested in an over- 
thecounter stock of a large poultry pro- 
ducer whose forthcoming earnings 
would be fantastic because of expansion 
nto European markets—all went as p 
dicted until the Common Mar 
formed and foreign imports were di: 
couraged, and the stock, bought at 22, 
had 10 be sold at 6); of "inside inform: 
tion” that proved uninformed (anoth 
nd told me he invested in a company 
because the president of the bank lend- 
ing money to that company highly rec- 
ommended stock and said 
buying it for himself, but the company 
nded in bankruptcy): of arid, profitles 
years when the Dow-Jones was soaring to 
new highs lt may be easy to make 
money in the stock market. It is certainly 
easy to lose it. 

What all the nulebooks and all the 
pamphlets tell you about how to avoid 
losing your capital is true: You shouldn't 
listen to rumors, vou shouldn't ty to 
trade, you shouldn't buy on margin, you 
should diversify your holdings. you 
should buy quality. you should be in- 
formed about a company and invest in it 
because you have faith in its future and 
patient for that future to 
Then if a stock falls from 45 10 371% 
you don't have to decide wl 
time to jump or hold on; the company 
sound, you're gewing a dividend, you 
can wait, That is investment, even if you 
should prove wrong and have inve 
unwisely, Anything else is speculation. IF 
I bad invested instead of speculating, I 
would have an impressive portfolio now 
nd an appreciable income in dividends. 
Your broker should be your best ally. 
You can buy advice from mail service 
but they aren't too helpful in the long 

in. They can contradict one anothei 
They can be obstinately wrong. They 
can have runs of luck. then. periods of 
sterility. They usually recommend so 
many stocks you don't know which to 
buy. anyway. They can, I think, point 
out stocks that look good, so that you 


the he w 


arrive 


d watch their be 
ve you food for 


1 investigate them 
havior; and they can gi 
thought about what the market and the 
economy will be doing in the next year. 
But you can't follow a service blindly 
Your broker and his firm will have 
enough names of stocks "likely to ap- 
preciate,” heaven knows—as many as any 
service can supply. Your broker can time 
purchases properly, waiting for dipi— 
those two- or three-point edges can give 
you a grear feeling of security; and 
you are short-term trading, those two or 
three points may be your profit. You will 
naturally seek ош a man amenable to 
both your personality and your invest- 
ment goals—someone you feel you can 
talk to comfortably: like a doctor, he be- 
comes a very personal consultant. If you 
are looking for safety, he should ob- 
viously be conservative and investment- 
minded. If you yourself, however, insist 
on more dangerous paths, then you will 
undoubtedly gravitate toward the kind 
of broker | seemed to have invariably 
found. And T think my case proves how 
wrong such brokers can be. Yon- like it 
or not—have to shoulder the responsibil- 
ity of decisions. too. A broker has many 
clients and many conflicting interests 10 
juggle in his mind: you have only yours. 
And it’s your money —vou keep a jealous, 
zealous eye on it. The safest way to in- 
vest is to put your money in а conservi- 
tive mutual fund or let a cautious broker 
pick om a portfolio af unimpeachable 
quality. That way you can wait out exen 
the severest slumps. But it is very hard, 
especially for the younger investor. to 
put all one’s money in blue chips. They 
climb upward, it is true, but with majes- 
tic languor. while one watches the glim- 
or issues spring ahead with seemingly 
repressible ease. It might the be 
wise, for many of us, to put, say, 80 per 
cent of our money into blue chips and 
try our luck and skill with the balance. 
If you decide to follow that course, just 
take it slow and easy for a long time. In 
vest only part of that 20 percent at first, 
no matter how small that amount must 
be. Learn by experience the dangers 
lurking in the market, the surprises, the 
sudden drops, the terrors of steep and 
rapid declines: find out. even in a “ne 
al" and healthy market, the rhythm of 
stocks—how they spurt ahead, drop back. 


rest, move ahead again. In short, gai 
the “feel” of the market. Then toss in 
the rest—of the 90 percent 

H only part of your money ñ in 


volved in wading, you can gamble, 
learn, taste the excitement of great po- 
tential gain, without fearing you will be 
wiped out. After all, that way the most 
you can lose is one fifth of your money. 1 
wish somcone had given me that advice 
although 1 know, if I am honest with 
myself, that 1 probably wouldn't 
taken it. Cupidity is seldom circu 


m. 


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PAROONE, 


7 SWEETIE, | MISTOOK 
YOUR SHAPELESS BLUR 
FOR HER SHAPELESS 


ME ON, 
ANNIE, BABY, WHO NEEDS THIS 2 
THE HOOPADEDOO SHOW'S HAO IT. LET 
ME PLACE YOU WITH SOMETHING, IMPORTANT! 
- SOMETHING WITH A FUTURE 
THIS FRIEND OF MINE IS Lonen 
AUDITIONS FOR A MAJOR NUDIE - 


LEAPIN' LIZAROS, 
SOLLY, YOU MUSTN'T TALK 
LIKE THAT ANO DURING REHEARSAL! 
THE HOOPADE OOO SHOW i5 VERY 
IMPORTANT TO THE YOUNGER 
GENERATION! WHY, IT’S LIKE 
A RELIGION TO THE YOUTH 
OF AMERICA! 


| THE WHOLE WORLD 15 RUNNIN’ 


- BESIDES, THE NETWORK PROGRAM 
DIRECTOR, MR. AUBREY AUBREY, MIGHT 
HEAR YOU. HE'S VISITING THE STUDIO. 


BABY, I'VE GOT A GROUP OF PRO- 
TEST SINGERS FOR ME. AUBREY. 


SH! SH! BOBBY DOLEFUL 15 ABOUT 
TO SING HIS LATEST PROTEST SONG! 


1 AM THE 
VOICE OF A MILLION 
SWOLLEN BELLIES 


OH, BOBBY ... 
YOU'RE TOO MUCH! 
SUCH PROTEST! WHERE 


AND THE GHETTO OF 
WATTS. | AM THE 
SOUND OF POVERTY. 


PURSUIT OF HAPPINESS 
GIVES ME NO REST 
CHASIN’ MONEY'S A 
POINTLESS QUEST 
4 HOPE YEW'EE LISTENIN" 
AN GITTIN' OEPRESSEO 
NOW, LIKE ME, YOU 
ARE ALSO RIPE FOR 
DISASTER f 


А МАО ARMS RACE 
IN VIETNAM WE JES’ DON’ 

HAVE ANY CASE 
THE ORAFT BOARD TELLS ME 

THE ARMY'S МУ PLACE af 
OH, DON'T YOU SEE 

HOW RIPE 1 AM FOR 

DISASTER — 


AER GOD: 
SESSUE. WELL, 
Б TA-TA EVERYONE. гм fd 
OFF TO SEE MY T 
BROKER 


E 
LIMOUSINE 
AWAITS 
WITHOUT. 


SH, SOLLY! 
SONNY AND WANDA 
ARE ABOUT TO SING 

THEIR NEWEST 

PROTEST HIT. 

+ THEY'RE 50 
NONCONFORMIST, 


THEY WONOER WHY You LOVE МЕ " THEY RESENT THAT 1 WILL 
AMIDST THEIR LIVING HELL NOT CONFORM AT ALL 
4 WATCH THEIR EVIL WAYS ANO JUST CAUSE | WEAR A 


4 JUST HAVE rO REBEL- LAMPSHADE FOR A BALL 
AND HIT MY HERO WITH ALL 


MY MIGHT AGAINST THE WALL. 


o0 50 001, BABES 
50001, BABE! 
So 001, BABES 


SODO |, BABE! 
50 po 1, BABE! 


NOTHING! NUH THING 
MY PROTEST SINGERS MAKE THEM 
SOUND LIKE THE LAUGHING RECORD. 


GOLLY =- WANDA 15 AN OLD 


GOOONESS, no! 
WANDA HAS THE CIGAR 7 
THEY'RE VERY NON- 

CONFORMIST 


оон! OOH! 
LOVING 

ANTHONY 

15 ABOUT 


PLAYBOY 


H 
AND WANDA occ 


BY THE 
LIPSTICK 


NONCONFORMIST FRIEND OF 
MINE AND SONNY [5 HER NON- 
CONFORMIST BOYFRIEND. 


— 
SHAKE IT Y 
UP, BABY! 
FRUG IT UP, BABY! \ ¿ 
TWIST IT ОР BABY! 
PA SO HAPPY! ` K 
М 50 HAPPY! 


HONEY ++- YOU'RE JUST NOT 
WITH IT. YOU'RE NOT WORKING OUT 
OF THE PROTEST BAG YOU DO NOT DIG 
1 GUESS YOU JUST HAVENT LIVED WITH 
OPPRESSION ANO DEPRIVATION 
LIKE OUR PROTEST SINGERS HAVE 


j| OWEE! OWEEE! ` 
LOVE! JOY! 


À HAPPINESS ! 


1 CALL THEM THE 
ULTIMATE PROTESTS! 
ANO HERE THEY ARE! 
THEY WALK, TALK AND 
SMELL PROTEST! SHOW 

MK. AUBREY YOUR 

SHTICK, KIDS! 


YOURE FIRED ANO 
YOU'RE FIRED. 


AUBIE, HONEY! ive сот a 
PROTEST GROUP 1 WANT YOU TO 
HEAR. THEY'LL MAKE YOUR BEST 
PROTEST SINGERS SOUND LIKE 
SNOW WHITE'S SEVENTH 

DWARF, “HAPPY”! 


{ PRODUCER, 
SOLLY. I'M 

BUSY FIRING 
SOME PEOPLE. 


< 
ТЫНАТ ARE THEY DOING? 

-OPENING THE TIN AND 
SPILLING STUFF ALL OVER ---!? W 
WHAT'S THAT? A MATC 


€ H? 
М QUICK, ANNIE, YOUR ROBE! 


кеште 


BEEYOODIFUL! 
BEEYOODIFUL! 


Ë 227 


PLAYBOY 


228 


PLAYBOY 
READER SERVICE 


Write to Janet Pilgrim for the an- 
swers to your shopping questions. 
She will provide you with the name 
of a retail store in or near your city 
where you can buy any of the spe- 
cialized items advertised or edito- 
rially featured in PLAYBOY. For 
example, where-to-buy information is 
available for the merchandise of the 
advertisers in this issue listed below. 


Miss Pilgrim will be happy to answer 
any of your other questions on fash- 
ivn, travel, food and drink, hi-fi, etc. 
If your question involves items you 
saw in PLAYBOY, please specify page 
number and issue of the magazine as 
well as a brief description of the items 
when you write. 


PLAYBOY READER SERVICE 


Playboy Building, 919 N. Michigan Ave. 
Chicago, Illinois 60611 


USE CONVENIENT GIFT SUBSCRIPTION 
ENVELOPE, PAGE 37 


PLAYBOY 


PLAYBOY $ 


C] 3 yr. lor 320 (Save 510.00) 
O 1 yr. for $8 (Save 52.00) 
[D Payment enclosed — [7] bill later 


uy state 


Mail io PLAYBOY 


Playboy Buildin, 919 N. Michigan Ave. 
Chicago, Ilinois 60611 
мио 


zip code no. 


NEXT MONTH: 


[m 


NUDER рок 


ANCIENT COMPANY — EUROFLAM SING 


“THE SUPREME COURT"'—AN INCISIVE APPRAISAL OF THAT 
AUGUST BODY'S ROLE AS GUARDIAN OF CIVIL RIGHTS AND “КЕР. 
UGE FOR THE WEAK"—BY NAT HENTOFF 


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“THE ANCIENT COVIPANY"—HE HAD A FATEFUL DECISION TO 
MAKE: SHOULD HE TAKE THE EX-NAZI'S LIFE AND RUIN HIS 
OWN OR DO NOTHING AND BECOME A PARTY TO A NEW FORM 
OF GENOCIDE?—A TALE OF TORMENT BY HERBERT GOLD 


NORMAN THOMAS, ELDER STATESMAN OF AMERICAN SOCIAL- 
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WELFARE STATE, U.S. FOREIGN POLICY AND THE BOMBING OF 
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“THE SEXUAL FREEDOM LEAGUE"—MAKE LOVE, NOT WAR, 
15 THE CREDO, AND PRACTICE, OF THIS INTREPID SAN FRAN 
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“A MOST MIRACULOUS ORGAN"—AN ASTOUNDING INVEN- 
TION PRODUCES SOME UNEXPECTEDLY UNFORTUNATE RESULTS. 
—A FEVERISH FANTASY BY RAY RUSSELL 


“THE NINTH UPLAND GAME BIRD"—OUT OF HIS CITY SUR- 
ROUNDINGS, THE PIGEON OFFERS THE AMERICAN HUNTER A 
FAST-MOVING, ALL-SEASONS TARGET—BY VANCE BOURJAILY 


“DAPHNE BIGELOW AND THE SNAIL-ENCRUSTED TINFOIL 
NOOSE"—WHEREIN A LOVE-STRUCK HOOSIER KID DISCOVERS 
THAT THERE'S NO ROOM AT THE TOP—BY JEAN SHEPHERD 


“HOW I WOULD START AGAIN TODAY"—EXPLORING THE 
ELYSIAN FIELDS OF INDUSTRY THAT AWAIT THE YOUNG MAN 
ABOUT TO ENTER THE BUSINESS WORLD—BY J. PAUL GETTY 


“SKIING EUROPE"—PLAYBOY'S GUIDE TO WHERE THE CON- 
TINENTAL ACTION IS, ON THE SLOPES AND APRES-SKI 


You've got it taped with the lively look 
1 l A 1 1 | 


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