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i КАТА!ММЕМТ FOR M "dee PV APRIL 1972 #0 PBouar 


Peppermint 
Martin 


(An interim idea.) 


Somebody once seid;"If 
the perfect martini is ever 
created, it won't be a martini” 

Until now, two things 
stood between the martini and 
perfection. Gin and vermouth. 
Substitute Smirnoff for gin 
and you're halfway there. But 


E 


| 


what can you substitute for 
vermouth? We haven't found it 
yet, but we've come close 
with peppermint schnapps. 
(Honest!) It gives a martini a 
chilly freshness so brisk its 
almost startling. 

You might ider having 
опе or two sometime. Like 
when you're describing your 
past and present to someone 
you're hoping will share your 
future. Meanwhile we'll keep 
looking for something even 
more perfect. 


©тїто{ 


s you breathle 


Can you find the Volkswagen hidden in this picture? 


If you can, you'll make us very sad. 
Because we've troubled ou: 
to hide it from you. 
Our quest for the invisible Volkswagen 
took us oll the woy to Turin, Italy. 
/here we asked the famous Ghio Studios 
to design us a sporty Italian body. 
They did. 
Their drawings 


ves no end 


lutched tightly in hond, 
we secretly prowled about Europe for the 


best coach builder we could find 

Success. To the Kormonn Coachworks of 
Osnobrück we handed over Chio's sketches 
with the injunction: 

"Моке it beautiful 

They di 

They welded. And burnished. And sculp- 
ted. And sanded, And painted. 

Until they had shaped in steel whot Ghia 
hod shaped in pencil. 


{Or else.) 


Smug in the knowledge that nobody 
could ever mistoke this beoutiful cor for o 
Volkswagen, we made it о Volkswagen. 
By concealing our air-cooled engine in 
back. (For better traction) 
And moking it go about 24 miles on just 
one gallon. 
Then we gove 
its finol disguise 
We named it the Когтопп Chic. 


is Volkswogen 


With every pair of Mr. Stanley's 
Hot Pants goes a free pack of short- 
short filter cigarettes. 


Now everybody will be wearing 
hot pants and smoking short-short 
filter cigarettes almost everybody. 


4 


Camel Filters. 
They're not for everybody. 


(But then, they don't try to be.) 


з... 
Э 


20 mg, “tat 13 mg. nicotine av. per cigarette, FTC Report AUG. 71. 


PLAYBILL “¢ ception 


of Eugene McCarthy, 
who remains quixotic to most Ameri- 
cans, our politicians are not pocts. In 
the Orient, things are different. Such 
major revolutionary leaders as Mao Tse- 
nd the late Ho Chi Minh n 
r moments of t 
student, Mao bega 
to set down his ideas and experiences 
verse, and he continued to write суеп 
after he became a leader of the Communist 
forces in the civil war against the Kuomin- 
chronicle of the revolution, 
s poetry blends in classical form 
lyric sense of the ad the 
personalities of the m my. 
Seven Poems by Mao Tse-tung is сх 


tracted from а book of trans 
Paul Engle in collabor 
wife, Hua-ling. Engle I 
ed poet, lecturer and editor 

and traditional rival 
ways been obsessed with 
being ichiban, or number one. Rather 
than military, its principal strategy is 
cconomic—a. vast development of indus- 
uy and trade. Unsettling as the Japanese 
surge is to American businessmen, it also 
has its comic side—an element of near- 
feudal behavior with some Orwel 
trols thrown in to keep the workers 
check and the assembly lines running. In 


ions by 
ith his 
aself is à respect 


MARTIN 


BRADFORD 


From Those Wonderful Folks Who Bring 


You... , Neil Martin explores the tactics 
that have heightened the status of MADE 
IN JAPAN. 

I there оп wine free market 


left in the world, it is in dope. But dealers 
not only get left out when the subsi 
are passed around, they are 
harassed by the Government—a 
that results in the kind of bizarre episodes 
Donn Pearce details in The Thirty- 
Caliber Roach Clip. Pcarcc—thc 
of Cool Hand Luke—has a new novel, 
Pier Head Jump, duc for publication by 
Bobbs-Merrill in May. 

“Jamestown Seventy,” a treatise by 
James F. Blumstein and James Ph 
which appeared in the Yale Review of 
Law and Social Action, advocates that dis- 
illusioned youth electorally usurp both 
the land and the legislature in some 
sparsely populated state. This revolution- 
y manifesto was required reading. for 
Richard Pollak when he sat down to 
write Taking Over Vermont, in which 
he projects а lessthan 

Heading this month's fiction arc two 
fantasies. In The Adventures of Chauncey 
Alcock, by Lawrence Sanders—author of 
The Anderson Tapes—the joke is on in- 
nocent Chauncey. who is seduced but cer- 
tainly not abandoned. Herbert Gold was 
inspired by the snakelike road le 
10 Sunson Beach in Northern California 
to write а “daymare.” In bis One Way to 
Bolinas, a middle-aged traveler picks up 
a female hitchhiker and takes a bad turn. 
Rounding out our fiction is the second 
installment of The Terminal Man, by 
Michael Crichton, the book version of 
which will be published by Alfred A. 
Knopf. Inc. in May. Hlustrations. for 
The Terminal Man ave by Rou Bradford. 

Like many others, novelist Anthony 
Burgess has experienced Precognition, 
the kind of knowledge that comes mys 
teriously through dreams and. intuition. 
No doubt he t his instincts 
had bet liule better when he p d 
—lor а nom price—with the film 
rights to his novel A Clockwork Orange, 
which became Stanley Kubrick's widely 
acclaimed and hugely successful movie. 

Currently feuding: Baron Roy 
dries de Groot and Calvin. Tril both 
men who like a good dinner. De Groot, 
thor of Feasts for All Seasons and the 
soonto-be-published The Auberge of the 
Flowering Hearth, went off in search of 


wishes th 


An- 


ERIKSON 


CASILLI 


the world’s very best meal. Trillin, who 
explores America for The New Yorke 
“U.S. Journal,” decided | 
nothing could top the 
ive kansas С 
of fest-caughe 


After 


splendid 
Loire pike, 
Groot asks, Have I Found the Greatest 
Restaurant in the World? Trillin's 


ап- 


plays 
who argue 
Over a Scrabble match in. Kephas and 
Elohenu, a mock play by c 
uthor J. B. Handelsman. The illustrator 
wing for 
Toversial For Christ's 
nuary 1970 


s 


ng with mind stumpers, James F. Fixx 
presents 22 puzzlers from his forthcom- 
ing book. Games for the Superintelli; 


гет, 
to be published by Doubleday. n 


editor of the new hardcover bimonthly, 
Audience, which focuses on contemporary 


American taste, Further 1 exclusive 
interview with Jack Nicholson: Playboy's 
Spring < Summer Fashion Forecast, by 


Robert L. Green; and Orgy, а cartoon 
feature by Alden Erikson. Plus: Turned- 
On Tubs, lovely Tiffany Bolling and 


Playmate Vicki Peters, 
by Mario Casilli 


11 photographed 
No April fool hc. 


BURGESS 


HANDE 


SMAN 


vol. 19, по. 4—april, 1972 


PLAYBOY. 


CONTENTS FOR THE MEN'S ENTERTAINMENT MAGAZINE 


PLAYBILL re бе 3 
DEAR PLAYBOY ‘ = — Ó = 11 
PLAYBOY AFTER HOURS. . Кас, REE 
АЕ. i — — 22 
BOOKS е ی‎ 026) 
DINING-DRINKING E E 32 
MOVIES — 2 en ЫЙ 
MUSEUMS 2 44 
RECORDINGS... x З тарын o я 48 
THEATER есет 54 
THE PLAYBOY ADVISOR. =. = 87 
ТНЕ PLAYBOY FORUM 7 = 2 TUR 61 
PLAYBOY INTERVIEW; JACK NICHOLSON candid conversation =, жЕ 


THE ADVENTURES OF CHAUNCEY ALCOCK fiction LAWRENCE SANDERS 92 


THE THIRTY-CALIBER ROACH CLIP—article DONN PEARCE 96 
TURNED-ON TUBS—modern living 99 
GAMES FOR THE SUPERINTELLIGENT—quiz, JAMES F. FIXX 105 
HAVE | FOUND THE GREATEST RESTAURANT 
IN THE WORLD?— opinion Ls. ROY ANDRIES DE GROOT 106 
NO!—opinion З CALVIN TRUN 108 
POP'S GIRLS— pictorial MEL RAMOS 111 
esl RESP mE? THE BUBBLE HOUSE, A RISING MARKET— modern living nz 
ONE WAY TO BOLINAS—fiction HERBERT GOLD 121 
GREAT FROM ANY ANGLE—playboy's playmate of the month 2 142, 
PLAYBOY'S PARTY JOKES —humor. З 130 
KEPHAS AND ELOHENU— humor. TN 2. B. HANDELSMAN 132 


PLAYBOY'S SPRING & SUMMER FASHION FORECAST attire. ROBERT 1. GREEN 136 
THE TERMINAL MAN—fi 
TAKING OVER VERMONT—article. RICHARD POLAK 147 


n 2 MICHAEL CRICHTON 144 


FROM THOSE WONDERFUL FOLKS WHO BRING YOU . . .—article NEIL MARTIN 151 


TIFFANY'S A GEM—pictorial Е 153 

THE VARGAS GIRL pictoriol ALBERTO VARGAS 160 

THE CLEVER DAUGHTER—ribold classic 5 161 

SEVEN POEMS—verse 2 MAO TSE-TUNG 163 

PRECOGNITION — article ANTHONY BURGESS 169 

ORGY —hvmor ccm ALDEN ERIKSON 171 

d j ON THE SCENE—personolities. 176 
Fashion Forecast PLAYBOY POTPOURRI. m = re 192 


GENERAL OrriGES: FLAYBOY DUILOING, 919 NORTH MICHIGAN AVE. CHICAGO. ILLINOIS єбїї RETURN POSTAGE MUST ACCOMPANY ALL MANUSCRIPTS. DRAWINGS AND PHOTO: 
GRAPHS SUBMITTED IF THEY ARE TO DE RETURNED AND NO RESPOXSIBLITY CAN BE ASSUMED FOR UNSOLICITEO MATERIALS, ALL S IN LETTERS SENT то PLAYBOY wat we 
TREATED AS UNCONDITIONALLY ASSIGNED FOR PUBLICATION AND COPYRIGHT PURPOSES AND AS SUBIECT TO PLAYBOY'S UNRESTRICTED MIGHT TO EDIT AND TO COMMENT. FOITORIALLY 
CONTENTS COPYRIGHT © 1972 BY PLAYBOY ALL RIGHTS RESERVED, PLAYBOY AND RABBIT HEAD SYMEOL ARE MARKS OF PLAYBOY. REGISTERED 0 $ PATENT OFFICE MARCA Рета, 

AND PLACES IN THE FICTION AND SEMIFICTION IN THIS MAGAZINE AMD ANY REAL PEOPLE AND Pisces IS Ринку COMCIENTAL CREOS, CovEm, MODEL ROSIE 
HOLOTIK PHOTOGRAPHED BY DWIGHT MODKER OTHER PHOTOGRAPHY BY: GENE ANTHONY. P 3, BILL ARSENAULT. Р W93 (2): DON AZUMA, Р I06. ‚ой. 12, MARIO CASILU, 
тї. 123, 129: ALAN CLIFTON. Р з. 176. JEFF COMEN. P 3. 172) ат FISHER. P з, BILL FRANTZ Р 477 DWIGHT HOOKED. 19) CARL am. P. э, 75, аг hanow Me umor, 
P o3 пон ORMTZ, P. G2 (9). V 2 BARRY O'ROURKE, P. 3 (2). 113. POMPEO POSAR, P 144; SUZANNE SECO. P 3 (2); VEJNON а SMITH, P 3 (а). ALEXAS URBA, Р. 16. 


1972. VOLUME 19. NUMBEI а PUBLISHED MONTHLY BY PLAYBOY. IN NATIONAL AND REGIONAL EDITIONS PLAYBOY BUILDING. 919 WORTH MICHIGAN 
ML earn SICOMD.CLASS POSTAGE PMD AT CHICAGO, ILL. AND AT ADDITIONAL MAILING OFFICES кизксшетюмк Im THE U S. #10 топ OME YEAR 


Introducing 
the Hertz 
Pay-Nothing- 
Per-Mile 


Rates. 


Usually when you rent a 
car you pay by the mile. 

Which is perfectly reason- 
able for short rentals. 

But if you’re renting longer 
and doing lots of driving, those 
miles can get pretty expensive. 

Well, now at most but not all 
Hertz locations, we have some- 
thing called Pay- Nothing - Per- 
Mile Rates. Good for 4 days or 
more. 

So you can drive a Ford 
Galaxie, Torino or similar sedan 
all the miles you want without 
paying a mileage charge. 

Just pay for the gasand re- 
turn the car where you rented it. 

The Hertz Pay-Nothing- 
Per-Mile Rates. 

Now you can think about 
where you want to go. Not how 
much it costs to get there. 

For reservations and infor- 
mation call Hertz at 800-654-3131 
toll free or your 
travel agent. 


PLAYBOY 


“Our martini Secret? 

Dip alemon peel in vermouth. 
And use the gin that makes 
the perfect martini in (o first place. 
Seagram's Extra Dry 


Seagram Distillers Company, New York, NY. 90 Proof. Distilled Dry Gin. Distilled from American Grain 


PLAY BOY 


HUGH M. HEFNER 
editor and publisher 


А. C. SPECTORSKY 
associate publisher and editoriel director 


ARTHUR PAUL art direcior 
JACK J. KESSIE managing editor 
MARK KAUFFMAN photography editor 


EDITORIAL 
SHELDON WAS, MURRAY FISHER, NAT LERMAN 
assistant managing editors 
ARTICLES: ARTHUR KRETCHMEH editor, 
DAVID. BUTLER. associate editor 
FICTION: ROBIE MACAULEY editor, SUZANNE 
ме NEAR, STANLEY PALEY assistant. editors 
SERVICE FEATURES: тел ows moder 
living editor, ROGER WIDENER, RAY WILLIAMS 
assistant editors; ROWER t, GREEN fashion 
director, WALTER HOLMES fashion coordinator, 
DAVID PLATT asociate fashion editor; 
REG POTTERTON associate travel editor; 
THOMAS MARIO food drink editor 


DAVID STEVENS senior editors: 
GEOFEREY NORMAN, PRANK N. ROBINSON, 
DAVID STANDISH, CRAIG VETTER staff writers: 
WILLIAM. J. HELMER, GRETCHEN 

MC NEESE associate editors 

LAURA LONGLEY BABI, DOUGLAS BAUER, DOUGH АЗ 
C. BENSON, TOBA J. COHEN, ARNIE WOLFE 
assistant editors; |. NUL GETIY (business è 
finance), NAT WENTOFF, MICHAEL LAURENCE 
RICHARD WARREN LEWIS, REN W. PURDY 

RAY RUSSELL, JEAN SHEPHERD, KENNETH TYNAN, 
TOMI UNGERER contributing editors 

MICHELLE URRY associate cartoon editor 
COPY: хи ЕЛЕ noURAS editor, 

STAN AMBER assistant editor 

RESEARCH: BERNICE т. ZIMMERMAN editor 
ADMINISTRATIVE SERVICES: 

THEO FREDERICK Personnel director; 

PATRICIA VAPANGELIS Fights © permissions: 
MILDRED ZIMMERMAN administrati 


sistant 


ART 
п. MICHAEL SISSON execulive assistunt: 
ТОМ STAEBLER, KERIG POPE associate directors; 
NOW POST, ROY MOODY, LEN WINS, € 
SUSKI. GORDON MORTENSEN, FRED NELSON, 
JOSEPH PACER assistant directory: 
SALLY BAKER, VICTOR HUBBARD, 
JONN KJOS тї assistants 


PHOTOGRAPHY 
ALFRED DE BAT, MARILYN 

GRAMOWSKE asociate editors; 

тиз. ARSEN AULT, DAVID CHAN, шемлив 
FEGLEY, DWIGHT HOOKER, POMPTO POSAR, 
ALENAS ERBA staf} photographer 

лш. m associate staff photographer: 
LEO KRIEGE photo lab superivorz 

JANICE BERKOWITZ chief stylist 

FRANCINE GOURGUECHON stylist 


PRODUCTION 
JONN MASTRO director: MALEN VANO 
manager: VANORE WAGNTR, REFA JONSSON 
ELIZABETH FOSS, GERRIT ном: азал 


READER SERVICE 
CAROLE. сили: director 


CIRCULATION 
THOMAS G. WILLIAMS customer service 
ALVIN WIEMOLD subscription manager: 
VINCENT THOMPSON newsstand manager 


ADVERTISING 
HOWARD w. LEDERER advertising director 
TLAYBOY ENTERPRISES, INC 
кошт є. rres business manager and 
associate publisher: RENARD s, ROSENZWEIG 
executive assistant to the publisher; 
тисилкр м. korr editorial administrator 


PLAYBOY, April 1072. Vol. 19. No. 4. Pul 
lished monthly by Playboy, Playboy Bldg., 
919 N. Michigan Ave, Chicago, Hi. 60611. 


What Florsheim 
is doing for you: 


ryw! 
put them together is not so sensational. To do it in 1 
leather that never needs polish, and is soft and light, їз зеп: 
tional. It makes your Summer shoes authentic and unique at the 
same time. Other things being done include America's largest 
selling quality buckle shoe, maintaining the legendary perform- 
ance of Imperial brogues, and the fact that Florsheim Shoes still 
start at $19.95 and still stand for the finest workmanship and 
materials. In these changing times Florsheim gets a lot done. 


Featuring: The BARON, 40035 white elegant patent leather, plain toe. zipper boot, rubber heels 
24008 black patent e 34004 brown patent. Most Imperial styles $39.95/ Most regular Florsheim styles $19.95 to $29.95 


THE FLORSHEIM SHOE COMPANY * CHICAGO 60606 * A DIVISION OF INTERCO INCORPORATED 


Why you need a 


The picture on the far right was 
taken by the only camera of its 
kind in the world. 

Most camera owners cannot get 
close-up portraits at all. And those 
that can need expensive cameras 
or expensive accessories to do so. 

'The Big Shot gets them. In 60 
seconds. For $19.95: 

Portraits—the kind of pictures 
you want most. The Polaroid Big 
Shot Land camera is for close-up 
color portraits only. That's why it 
looks unusual-its length gives you 
the same kind of pictures as studio 
portrait cameras, or expensive 
cameras with complicated lenses 
and attachments. 

These are the kind of pictures 
you want most-not only close-ups, 
but close-ups with rich portrait- 
like colors and lighting. 

Portraits that are hard to mess 
up. Forget words like “focus set- 
tings” and “exposure? This is the 


Most camera owners carrt 
get close-up portraits. 


simplest of all systems. 'To focus, 
just walk toward your subject until 
the two faces in the window are 
one-and press the button. 

Do not worry about lighting. It is 
the same, indoors or out. A light 
transmission panel in front of the 
flashcube eliminates harsh" flash" 
contrasts and gives you soft por- 
trait lighting for every shot. There 
isnotevenabattery to worry about. 


Polarcid® 


second camera. 


The Big Shot does 
(in 60 seconds). 


The built-in timer tells you when 
yourpicture is developed andready 
to see-and that’s it. It’s so easy 
anybody can take your portrait. 

Howcan we make this camera for 
$19.95? The secret is simplicity. 
The design that makes the Big 
Shot so easy to use also makes it 


amazingly inexpensive. 

The Big Shot takes every picture 
the same way-and simply elimi- 
nates all the adjustable devices on 
costly cameras. 

For instance, the distance for 
your pictures is always the same 
and the focus is set for this. The 
shutter speed is always the same 
andthe lightingisalwaysthesame. 

If you never took a picture be- 
fore, you can now have beautiful 
color portraits of Dad,Mom and the 
kids just 60 p 
seconds after 
you press the 
button. 

And if the 
ideaofasecond | 
camera sounds ^ 
extravagant,look 
at the priceagain. $19.95. 


Polaroid's $1995 Big Shot 


*Suggested list price. 


Drink Canada Dry with Bacard 
‘way, you” drink it with: 


bio aca 
Drink tonic or club soda with rum? Sure. You see, Canada 
Dry tonic has a light tang. One that's a natural for the 
subtle flavor of Bacardi light rum. And for highballs, our 
club soda is the one that keeps its sparkle longer. So 
you can enjoy the smooth, dry flavor of Bacardi dark 


29 
: К like Canada Dry 
tonic and club soda as much with Bacardi rum, the mixable 
one, as some people like them with gin or whiskey. 


BACARDI.rum and CANADA DRY, 


© 1972 BICARDE IMPORTS, INC., BACARDI BUILDING, MIAMI, FLA. RUM 8D PRODF. "BACARDI" AND тне BAT DEVICE ARE REGISTERED TRADEUAEKSOF BICARDT COMPANY LIMITED. 


DEAR PLAYBOY 


{EJ s00n655 гїлүноү MAGAZINE . PLAYBOY BUILDING, 919 N. MICHIGAN AVE., CHICAGO, ILLINOIS 60511 


WILDERNESS RHODES 

Richard Rhodess The Killing of the 
Everglades. (vLavnoy, January) exposes 
the twisted roots of our environmental 
crisis and celebrates the joyful victory of 
being—I have never been so moved by 
pother’s vision, Incidentally, President 
Nixon has asked Congress t0 buy the 
Big Cypress Swamp. The Preside nts ac 
tion goes far beyond the boundaries of 
the Everglades and environmental. poli- 
ties: И means that we ave all a little 
doser to being 
and with the 


at peace among ourselves 
th 
Joe Browder 
Washing 
Environmental Policy Center 
Washington. D.C 
Browder is the “friend of the earth” 
mentioned in Rhodes's account of his 


Representative 


journey to the Everglades. More informa- 
lion on the battle to save the Everglades 
is available from Environmental Policy 
Genter, 125 Fourth St, S.E, Washington, 
D. C. 20003 


I compliment rrAynoy for publishing 
Richard Rhodess thoughtful and bal- 
anced analysis of the crisis in the Ever- 
des. This area is one of the world’s 
most unique and specialized ecological 
pack 
make 


s. Whether or not change would 
more “useful” to man, if it is 
ad if it is de- 
ed ший we 


changed, it is destroyed 
stroyed. it cannot be re-cre: 


have another heaven and another carth 
Walter J. Hickel 
Anchorage, Alaska 


Former Secretary of the Interior in 


the Nixon Administration, Hickel has 
maintained a vigilant interest in better 
ing the environment. His most recent 
book ix “Who Owns America? 


Rhodes repeatedly uses the term pres 


ervation 


t 10 describe an unthinking in- 
dividual whose policy of hanging а Keer 
ОРЕ sign on everything has no good rea- 
son. The word use can mean irreversible 


depletion of a resource by a single gen- 
eration of men or, on the other hand, 
utilization of that same, unique resource 
tions of men. Con- 
servation was defined about 1907 by Gif- 
ford Pinchot and his colleagues in the 
newly established Forest Service, when 


by a thousand gener 


they said it would be a new Government 
policy providing for “use of the natural 
resources for the greatest good of the 


test number for the 10 


The big problem in getting this idea 
accepted is that it requires people of 
today to assume some responsibility for 
the interests of future generations. In 
short, “preservation” of the things human 
ity will continue to need in the future 


should be our first order of business, Im 
plications that deride the pres 


vationist 
as some kind of nut can harm an. impor 
tant part of our resourccananagement job. 
Durward L. Allen 
Department of Forestry and 
Conservation 
Purdue. University 
L , Ind. 


yeu 


a 


Tread the Everglades piece and roued 
it to the skies on my daily CBS Radio 
Network prog 


zm. 


Arthur Godfrey 
New York, New York 


In our serious destyuction of the Ever- 
glides. we have witnessed а serious trag 
Чу. Yet some measure of redemption 
begun under the leadership of Gov 


h 
ernor Askew of Florida, who has shown 


a new concern about things that. sustain 
our lives. We must wish him well in thc 
ades As Rich 
ard Rhodes points out in The Killing of 


baule to save the Ever 


the Everglades, “When we damage. the 
ourselves, If we de 
stroy it, we destroy ourselves." 


world, we dim: 


Senator George McGovern 
United States Senate 
Washington, D. C. 


Rid 
of мит 
glades and its slow det 
пон. I do think he could ha 
ae inlor 


d Rhodes does an excellent job 
ir 


the history of the Ever 


+ 
© included 
mation on the difficulty of 


n 
of Florida as a wildlife preserve, and 


maintaining the entire southern por 


he might hive suggested some reason 
able solutions. Ont obvious problem 
is that the population of Florida is 
very ту. What alternatives 
able t0 using the swampland for 


ow 


ai 
liv 


g space, agriculture and industry? И 
the population distribution is to be con 
trolled in order to preserve the wilder 


ness, what regulations will be needed? 
Rhodcs's essay mentions that present po 
litical institutions do not respect natural 

1 
ized to make it possible to control man's 


boundaries and they should be reor 


use of the environment; but I would 
like to hear suggestions about. how such 


gr gest time.” 
ARMS eit FON IWO Trans, 310 FOR OME TEAR ELSEWHERE ADD 32 FER VEAN FOR fORCIEM FOOTAGE ALLOW зо DAY? FOR 


Chantilly 
can shake her 


Chantilly 


HOUBIGANT 


Quelques Fleurs 
The beginning of a 
beautiful past. 


PERFUME FROM $10.00 
EAU DE TOILETTE FROM $4.50 


PLAYBOY 


12 


control might be accomplished. We must 

go beyond mere description of the Ever- 

glades tragedy and get down to the 

difficult tisk of making a persuasive, 

dollars-and-ccnts case for preserving that 

beautiful wild 
Representative Seymour Halpern 
0.5. House of Representatives 
Washington, D. C. 


KUBRICK'S CLOCK 
Stanley Kubrick's Æ Clockwork Or- 
(rtavmov, January) is one more 
example of a literary intellectual a 
g to force the psychedel 
his own nasty conception of what the 
human mind is all about. It is blasphemy 
against the Holy Ghost (the spirit of 
uth) and there is no forgiveness for it. 
Art Kleps, Chief Boo Hoo 
The Neo-American Church. 
San Cristobal, New Me 


NEWS VIEWS 

I'm in total agreement with John 
Chancellor's assessment in The News 
Media: Is That All There Is? (PLAYBOY, 
January). Electronic journalism has been 
п institution in this country since the 
wentics, and it's to the асай of the 
people who have served in the profes- 
sion since that time that we can say 
some good things about the ficld now. I 
hope jour 
ue in an attitude of professionalism with 
no holds barred. 


As a 20-year-old rookie radio announ 
er, I was greatly impressed by John 
Chancellor's honest appraisal of broad- 
ast journalism. The media are currently 
under attack by both the extreme right 
ıd the extreme left, and that leads me 
to believe that the industry must be 
reporting the facts honestly, with a mini- 
mum of pro or con commentary. The 
press—and it's about time we decided 
that broadcast. journalism is part of the 
pres—must be protected fom control 
or influence by any persou or group. It 
should bc up to the reporters themselves 
to regulate the press and then to dis 
credit anyone using his position as a 
pulpit from which to influence millions 
of people. It was best said by Edward R. 
Murrow: "Just because your voice car- 
ries halfway around the world you are по 
wiser than when it carried only to the 
end of the ba 


Mark Gibbons 
Walker, Minnesota 


Tn Harrison Salishury's remarkable ar- 
ticle Print Journalism, one can easily 
understand the lack of public support 
for the Vietnam war in spite of in- 
acased troop withdrawals. During the 
Kennedy and Johnson administrations, 
ane read only of "our" commitment 


through SEATO for liberty, increased 
body counts, pacification of rural arcas, 
naeased hamlet control and bombing 
raids into North Vietnam to “bring them 
to the negotiating table." All these state- 
ments of grandiose fiction пош 
lies were fed from the Defense Depart- 
ment to an cager institution represent- 
ing the status quo—the American pr 
Not until men like Salisbury began to 
investigate and reveal what wa 
ig were Americans able to decide 
themselves if 55,000 di 
were worth the price for a distant land 
few of us would ever ste. 

Don McGaugh 

Vietnam Veterans Against the War 

Warren, Michigan 


1 young men 


PARROT TROOPERS 
Ray Bradbury's January story, The 

Parrot Who Met Papa, was excellent— 
«d a fine departure for him into literary 
satire. The conceit of people squabbling 
over possession of an ancient parrot that's 
the repository for Hemingway's last great 
unwritten novel is perfec: It shows 
exactly the sort of literary grave robbing 
that Hemingway has been subjected to 
repeatedly—and pokes good fu 
large clan of Papa worshipers 
process. Good fun. 

Fran Scott. 

Great Neck, New York. 


It's good to know that the parrot, 
El Córdoba, is in sale hands—but ii 
unfortunate that Bradbury didn't also 
know about the talking myna bird, EL 
Kenya. When Hemingway was on safari 


in 1953, there was а myna t 
always at his side. During the 
when Hemingway talked а lot 


sleep, the myna listened. to everything. 
To this day, El Kenya is a storehouse of 


swav's nocturnal mutterings. It's 
get to him in 

ne; but, 5 too late. Someone has 
got to El Kenya and made him talk, and 


Sports Illustrated is running the whole 
ш. Let this be а warning to Bradbury: 
Keep El Córdoba heavily smeared with 
shoe polish. “Nevermore” is quite enough. 
A. E. Hotchner 
New York, New York 
Hotchner is the author of “Papa 
Hemingway: A Personal Memoir." 


SUN, SURF AND $ 

Although the title, 
Lighted Place of 
(PLavuoy, January), suggested just an- 
other cute report. on San Clemente, 
further reading provided a pleasant su 
prise: F, P. Tullius piece is an accurate, 
concise depiction of the town's special 
ambiance. As one who grew up in San 


“RET SERV 
A Clean, Well- 
White Houses 


Clemente, I. found thi le cvocative 
and thoroughly enjoyable. 
Roger Lauer, M. D. 
Silver Spring, Maryland. 


G 


RMANE GERMAINE 

Your interview. with. Germaine 
(riAvmov, January) gives good 
into the sexual feclings, tastes 
thoughts of a wom o raving, no 
fist pounding, no crucifying—just. some 
much-needed perceptive good sense. She 
advocates, I think, an honest sexual re- 
lationship between people, with cach one 
treating the other as а human be 
ather than as an object or a conquest; 
md 1 fail to sce how this should be incon- 
sistent with or in any way detrimental to 
PLAvoy’s philosophy. 


and 


Robert Madel 
Chicago, Ilinois 


I haven't seen an interview like thi 
either Irom man or from woman, in 
ages. How refreshing co find that a wom- 
am can think as Greer does, talk. as she 
does, write as she does—and, to quote 
Céline, “piss on it all from а considera- 
ble height." What's even more refresh 
ing is that she is out to liberate not just 


woman but also man—and how he 
necds it! She is so honest, so altogether 
defenseless that it makes one blush. VIL 


never forget what she said about fa 
in love and about writing. 

Thad to admire her way of ратуй 
the feeble thrusts of pravsov’s inter 
ewer, PLAYBOY ought to make her 
editor, or at least let her have a column 
to cavort іп monthly. This woman is 
dynamite—and I'm sure she is far better 
looking tham PrAYBOYs photographer 
made her out to ће 

Henry Miller 
Pacific Palisades, California 


The interview with Germaine Greer 
was one of the most stimulating conver- 
sttions in recent years. Jt was also a 
courageous publishing ventur 
most of her criticisms of your ma 
are deeply insighiful—espec 
comments about how your 
encourages sexual consumeri 
ironic, however, that PLAYBOY itself may 


help raise male and female relationships 


above the object level, expe 
compassionate and humane people as 
Greer continue to receive the forum 
they deserve. Based on past reading of 
your magazine, I think they will 
Dan Stern 
Instructor of Sociology 
Ohio University 
Saint Clairsville, Ohio 


lly i such 


In concentrating on sexism and fe 
male sexuality in your recent. interview 
with her, Germaine Greer has undercut 
the women’s movement. Women's libera- 
tion is ап aspect of human liberation; it 
is a movement toward political and legal 
ghis of all people. 
Because of its emphasis on sexual ex- 
ploitation, the women’s movement has 
been toothless to а large extent. To be 
effective at a political level, a coalition 


awareness of the 


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PLAYBOY 


14 


is needed of all oppressed people: 
ks, chicanos, migrant workers, wel- 
fare recipients, women—and men. Re- 
form is needed in education, in medical 
and dental care, in poverty control, in 
a renewal, in job tr 3 
in abortion legislation and im all legis- 
ion that puts constraints on human 


rights. Miss Greer seems to have over- 


looked this and, in condemning the 
"subliminal message" of rravmov, has 
also overlooked the many positive steps 


rraynoy and the Playboy Foundation 

ve taken toward a reevaluation of 
y and mores. 

S. de Jongh-Kearl, Convener 


Buffalo Feminist Party 
Bullalo, New York 


rLAYBOY is to be commended for its 
sporting interview with the illustrious 
Germaine Greer. But comparison of Greer, 
a feminist who actually likes men. to a 
Nazi le nge: TE 
а certain segment of your readership can 
p the subtlety, it might find comfort 
in the fact that there are countless wom 
en resisting the domination and defi 
tion of their lives by the white patriarchy 
who still welcome their associations with 
men. You must know that even among 


der who likes Jews is str 


liberation spokeswomen, separatism is 
rarely advocated—although the terms of 
togetherness may have been altered 
somewhat. 

As a cynical but not totally discour- 
aged member of the very sex whose 
exploitation made the Playboy empire 


what it is today, I would venture to say 
that the end of sexism does not mean 
the end of sex. In fact. if men and 
women begin to like amd respect cach 
other exclusive of their natural. attrac- 
tion, it could mean a new and rather 
inspirational beginnin 


Judith Pringle 
Tempe, Arizona 


Greer’s stating that men are equally 
enslaved by the inequality of the sexes 
indicates a remarkable degree of per- 
spective. A man who controls a woman is 

rolled by chat conuol no less than 
the w 


an is. His imprisonment is more 


that men are free, and 
vice versa. Ultimately, of course, we ar 
only as free as our neighbor. No one is 
really freer than the least of us. The 
perspective Miss Greer has developed 
something we all need a great di 
more of, 


William Pensinger 
Washington, D. C. 


Because of her foul mouth, my hus- 
band tely classified Germaine 
Greer as another hewoman and refused 
to read your 
fully, his negative veaction was not typ 
cal, but I have the feeling it may have 


immed 


been. Miss Greer's philosophy was prag- 
matic and her ideals were certainly 
feasible, but because of her unabridged 
vocabulary, I probably won't be the only 
one trying to convince а stubborn male 
that she's not out to castrate him. And 
I've got a long way to go, baby! 

Keasha Moore 

Grand Rapids, Michigan 


I think Germaine Greer is a beautiful 
person—whether she likes my cutoons 
or not. 


John Dempsey 
Del Mar, Califo! 


а 


"The Germaine Greer interview is excit- 
ing proof that a woman can be brilliant, 
profound, witty and damn sexy all in 
опе beautiful six-foot package—and proof 
that erano is the only magazine around 
s. Too 
le through 
bobbed-h painted 
puppets and frigid fillies to know so late 
in lile just how much a truly liberated fe- 
male could really turn us оп, Greer proves 
conclusively to me that relations between 
n beings сап and should be some- 
g other than the uszral antiseptic kinds 
depicted in а Rock Hudson-Doris Day 
aide В movie. Through it all, I could 
smell, taste and feel—if only on p 
a really broad broad. for once 
right down to her deliciously 
pits. Thanks for the best bang ever. 
1L. Dever 
bridge, Massachusett 


so many 


interview was 
is and I am out- 


filled obsceni 


with 
raged. How dare you corrupt the Ameri- 


сап public? For shame: Repent and мор 
using four-letter words before God's 
wrath strikes you in the groin. 

AL Goldstein, Exccutive Editor 

Serew 

New York. New York 


ABOUT THE INTERFACE 

AL the Interface: Technology and Mys- 
licis. (PLAYBOY, January), with Arthur 
C. Clarke and Alan Wats, was ou- 
standing. 1 hope I live to scc our 
society free of the religious idiocy th 
continues (0 cause our environmen 
social problems, We would all be 
better off without it. 


at 


DREAM MACHINES 

As а regular reader of pLaynoy, I was 
glad to sec that Ken W. Purdy, your most 
prolific writer, had once again come up 
with a really interesting article about 
half a dozen desirable cars, I do not know 
that I would have made the same choices 
for The Playboy Car Stable (rLavuoy, 
January), but I do know that whatever 
cas D had chosen, P could not have 
written more ningly about them. 


Apart from that, Ken has the happy knack 
of being able to impart a Iot of interest- 
в, cducational information without eve 
sounding like at salesman, 

Stirling Moss 

London, England 

Moss, a frequent competitor in world- 

wide sportscar racing, is one of the 
winningest drivers of our time. 


SOUL ON ICE 

It's been some time since Е. Frankli 
Frazier wrote Black Bourgeoisie, which 
depicted the cruel. tensions the middle- 


convincing illustration of 
vations as in Joyce Carol Oat 
Loves of Franklin Ambrose (PLAYBOY, 
January). 


Joseph Williams 
Toledo, Ohio 


2000 YEARS TALKING 
I would like tc congratulate Gene 
1 for his hilarious piece in the Janu- 
ary issue, An Interview with the Censor. 
I laughed out loud and I haven't done 
that since I read the first draft of The 
Producers. Siskel has the exceptional 
ability to do comic variations on the 
truth, I must say I was also haunted by 
the prophetic aura that surrounded the 
dialog. | have a strong feeling that Sis- 
kel's comic vapor will coalesce into veali- 
ty long before January 20, 1909. 
Mel Brooks 
New York, New York 


TRUE GRIT 

The Moment of Truth (pLaveoy, Janu 
ary) is one of the most intriguing sports 
articles ever published in апу magazine. 
Having been a sportswriter for daily 
newspapers for some ten years, T deli 
cd in reading of the inner feelings of 
these great athletes. T am now totally 
involved in rodeo, and 1 know I speak 


for the entire 3000-plus membership of 
The Rodeo Cowboys Association й 
thanking you for recognizing and 


cluding Larry Mahan as а respected pro- 
fessional athlete. Irs a slow proces to 
convince crusty old sports editors that 
rodeo belongs on their pages (it isn't 
played with a ball); but Larry was Ort 
gon’s Pro Athlete of the Year in 196 
and Olin Ye 


ng, New Mexico's in 1971 
so we feel we're gaining. When such 
prestigious publication as PrAvmoy tips 
its hat our way, we are—in the Western 
vernaculur—much obliged. 

Arland Calvert, Edito 
Rodeo Sports News 
Denver, 


Colorado 


One thing that stands out in your 
article The Moment of Truth is the 
competitive maure їп each and every 
one of егех. It is « us udi 
champion needs to be more. competi- 
tive than the next man, but there are 
also other attributes that are required to 


the 


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PLAYBOY 


18 


make him the athlete that he is, I would 
like to have seen a more detailed inter- 
view with each one of these gentlemen 
to find out what makes them so competi- 
tive and to compare their ideas with my 
fcelings about my own sport. 
Graham Hill 
Mill Hill, England 
Hill, a famous race-car driver, won 
the Indianapolis 500 in 1966 and has 
been a consistent winner of the Monaco 
Grand Prix. 


THE GRIM REEFER 

The situation that Garry Wills reco 
n Tm Busted! (eLavuoy, January) is the 
result of а failure in thinking on the part 
ve created a situation 
ase is worse 
Everything would be- 
ad simple if they would go 
back to the start т 1914, 
when the 
passed to curb the indiscriminate sale of 
opiates. Until the act was passed, anyone 
could buy opium or morpl 
drugstore. So the purpose of the H; 
Act was huma n: It kept pote 
dangerous substances out of the hands of 
the uninformed. Then a change occurred 
in the climate of opinion. The concept of 
the “drug fend” became current. People 
who took opiates were no longer regard- 
ed k iduals. They 
Then, by a 


з 


guided ind 
s of society. 


truly fantastic feat of defective thinking. 
the fiend idea became а 
, Which is not a n 


throw teenagers 

ng with m 
our judges are showing them- 
selves almost as unenlightened as their 
13th Century counterparts. who would 
condemn а woman to be burned alive 
for s witchcraft. Our witch- 
burning ancestors finally learned the 
error of their ways after millions of inno 
cent people had perished in agony. Our 


contemporary persecutors will presuma- 
bly one day leam the error of theirs. 
But before they can do so. the log of 
hypocrisy and muddled thinking that 


surrounds the subject of drug abuse has 
10 be cleared. Fact les such as 
I'm Busted! will certainly help toward 
the achievement of this end. 

Robert S. de Ropp 

Santa Rosa, California 

Author of the classic “Drugs and. the 

Mind.” De Ropp has more recently writ- 
ten “The Master Game: Beyond the Dr 
Experience.” 


too often, debate over changes 
in the legal status of marijuana has cen- 
tered on the possible harmful effects of 
the drug, rather than on the definite 
harmful effects of the drug laws. While 
legis stutter and stammer about 
legalizing a substance that “we don't yet 
know cnough about,” literally hundreds 


о 


of thousands of families each year suffer 
the painful experiences of arrest and 
conviction of one of their members. In- 
deed, а sensible a ve to the present 
situation is а n marijuan: 


arrests while the scemingly endless parade 
of committees, commissions and studies of 
marijuana continues. 

Lawrence M. Axelrod 

Society for the Legaliza 

of Mariju 
Stony Brook, New York 
Unfortunately, many politicians who 


have publicly declared a war on drugs 
also support our current destructive and 
counterproductive national policy to- 
ward na. We could take a major 
g our country 
drugabuse epidemic by legali 
juana, ng our law-enforcement 
«Пон toward. controlling. imernational 
heroin trallic and using the new ta 
сь from the billion-dollar mari- 
market to support drug-abuse 
treatment centers, parti arly in. inner- 
city ghetto areas. In this way, we could 
launch a much more effective attack оп 
the problem without any additional cost 
and without alienating or destroying a 
sizable por of our country’s next 
generation something our current m 
juana policies seem determined to do. 
David E. Smith, M. D. 
San Francisco, Californ 
Founder and medical director of the 
Haight-Ashbury Free Medical Clinic, 
Smith also edits the Journal of Psyche- 
delic Drugs. 


EDITOR: 

1 am extremely pleased and gratified 
to have won PLAYBOY'S bestessay award 
for Thanksgiving in Florence (Novem- 
ber 1971). Most writers could be (le- 
scribed. as dour people who know other 
writers who have won awards. rLAvmov 
is probably responsible for sweeter 
the sour grapes of more contempoi 
writers th ny mag. 
This contributor 
happy. 


ary 
ine in history. 
couldn't feel morc 


Joh Clellon Holmes 
Old Saybrook, Connecticut 


Thank you for the bestarticle award. 
I guess it was somewhat unfair of me to 
send in a piece far longer than what was 
expected, but it was handsome of you to 
give Centre Court (June 1971) an open- 
minded reading and to 
«меу. 


изе 


John MePhee 
New York, New York 


I've spent the past 20 years rehearsing 
acceptance. speeches for everything from 
the Academy Award to the now-defunct 
New York Daily Mirror's Beautiful Child 
Contest (I'd cheated and sent them one 
of my baby pictures—God, I was а cute 
нше kid!) last, when someone 


has been kind enough actus 
me somethi 
guess when someone does something nic 
what you do is say: Thank you. So— 
thank you for honoring as best major 
work Where Am I Now When I Need Me 
(March 1971). I'm really deeply g 

George Axel 


The wonderful news that I had placed 
first as a new fiction contributor with 
Gray Matters (June 1971) was surely the 
brightest moment in а week of blizzards, 
sub-zero temperatures and 105-mile- 
hou 


understand 


my appre 1 say tha 
Señor Gabriel Garcia Marquez (who 
placed second) is a writer 1 admire greatly. 


n, indeed, in distingui 
Will 
Pra 


Montana 


Many, many thanks for your hand 
some and unexpected gift in the for 
the nonfiction award as best writer new to 
PLAYBOY. I can assure you I enjoyed being 
in PLAYBOY as much as you appear to have 
liked having me there. I got a nice note 
from a friend in Vietnam the other day 
saying that battered copies of Goodbye 


of 


to the Blind Slash Dead Kid's. Hooch 
(August 1971) were still being passed 
ound s to case them 


in their a feeling ıl 

someone who understood had been th 

and remembered. Again, my thanks. 
Arthur Hadley 
West Tisbury, М 


ssachusetis 


Allow me to denounce my collabora- 
tor, Brock Yates, on the occasion of 
our winning your first-place 1971 satire 
rd for Major Howdy Bixby's Album 
of Forgotten Warbirds (January 1971). 
Yates, who professed vast expertise on 
the subject of arcane and obsolete 
World War Two aircraft and so weascled 
his way into my trust in this sensitive 
ng. later exposed the shabh 
ness of his credentials during an auto- 
graphing session at the Moose Lodge in 
Lamont, New York, As so often hap- 
pens, the two of us were di 
promptu game of "Name that plane.” 
armed with 
g more thin a 1941 edition of 
Jane’s All the World's Airerajt, wa 
enough to humiliate Yates, шогу me 
and lose us the contest. Yates mistook à 
Short Sea Mew for a DeHavilland Puss 
Moth: he confused a Blackburn Skua with 
a Supermarine Walrus; he stumbled over 
a simple Westland Lysander; and he 
booted ev most ubiquitous of д 
craft, the Bristol Bolingbroke. A mere 
poseur. A man like that isn’t fit to wear 
Major Howdy Bixby's goggles. 
Bruce McCall 
ew York, New York 


ч 


САМАРА 
ATITS BEST 


Canada at its best is the lakes. 
Crystal-clear gifts from nature; 
these cold, pure waters some“ 
times reach depths of several 
hundred feet. Canada. You can 
taste it. Tonight. Try the 
fastest growing whisky south 


IMPORTED of the Canadian border. 


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Mild, smooth taste—exclusive Micronite filter. 
King size or Deluxe 100's. 


Kings: 17 mg. "tar; 
10 mo. nicotine; 
100's: 19 mg. “tar.” 
1.2 mg. nicotine 
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FIC Report 
Aug. Tl. 


PLAYBOY AFTER HOURS 


win the season for weekend outings 
rapidly approaching, we think its 
ime we apprised you of the latest way to 
fill those Satuida 
w 


s—and your lungs: a 


pollution cruise. Not that all major 
In fact, some flatly 
deny there's a reason for them, since they 
haven't got any pollution. A top official 
of New Orleans’ chamber of commerce, 
for example, informs us that he doubts if 
"any of our waterways hold any interest 
from the standpoint of pollution, although 
driftwood is common and an occasional 


cities have them yet 


beer can is sighted.” In many othe 
Cities, the 
never been s 


port 
g business simply has 
cessful, 
kind of cruising done by ladies of the 
cvening. But if the packed boats—at 
513 a head—on Chicago Travel Club's 
all-day 65mile trips are any indication 
of interest, we predict that such cruises 
may be plying the waterways of most 
major 0. 5. ports in the near future. 
We took the Chicago tip one recent 


cruisi 


unless its the 


Saturday morning, boarding the Skyline 
Queen at her dock under the State Street 


bridge just north of Chicago's Loop. (As 
a matter of ecological interest, this is 
also the spot where Mayor Richard J. 
Daley dumps green dye into the Chicago 
River lor Saint Patrick's Day and where 
the firebouts spray water dyed red, white 
and blue wh Mb Presi 
dents come to town.) Ambling down the 


suonauts а 


gangplank, we were greeted by the gre 
garious tour director, nattily turned. out 
in a red-and-white-striped shirt, match 
ing tie and plastic name tag. He looked 
just like a carnival sideshow barker; bur 
when he began his spiel, afier we'd 
chugged out into the dark-green w 
of Lake Michi ed аһа 
impressions can be deceiving. 

ш Мі: 
as the city," he said over the loudspeak- 
cr, “is everything to us, But we take the 
s if it were always 


, we ге 


в moody and stormy 


lake for granted, 
here and always will be. What came out 
of the ice age may not survive the pollu 
tion age. As Carl Sandburg, the great 
poet who wrote about our city, said, ‘I 
may never tire of the lake, but the lake 
may tire of man. 


Continuing in this vein as the Skyline 
Queen plowed south and approached 
the sulphur-colored U.S. Steel 


works 


near Hammond, Indiana, he finally broke 
olf and. bellowed, 


Wanna make some 


moncy 

"Yeah!" yelled 
He proceeded to describe the ways a 
citizen who spots effluents can identify 
the polluter and be rewarded for help- 
ing bring the company to count. 

Nearly three hours later, after. passing 
through the black waters of the Calumet 
River, its banks lined with mills and 
loading docks, we finally turned into the 
CalumetSag Channel. And there, where 
the water was only dark brown instead 
of black, cue our 
group leader—rushed to one side of the 
boat to see a strange object floating 
near ihe bank. 

Wow!” he cheered. 
It's a real, live duck! 

Ten minutes later, he picked up the 
mike again. "OK, folks. Guess what time 
it is? Из lunchtime!” And the 
man crew began handing out thc 
stomach 


his cager audience. 


cveryonc—on from 


"Look, everybody. 


two- 


box 


lunches to those who could 
food. Alter delicacies 
roast beef on white, ham on rye, potato 
chips. plastic-wrapped brownies and tissue- 
covered apples—several guests, anxious to 
keep the boat clean, dutifully tossed their 
boxes and wrappers into the water. 

Hope you enjoyed the meal, folks,” 
the director barked. “Now, why don't 


we all just settle back, relax and pretend 


dining on the 


we're cruising on the beautiful canals of 


Venice, or down the Rhine or the 
Loire. 
We've got a pretty good imagination, 


but not that good. By the time we disem- 
barked some 30 miles later, however, we 
had decided that pollution cruises arc, 
indeed, the wave of the future. True, in 
Cleveland. not long ago, where а 


cruise 


line that operates on the Cuyahoga 
River had had the effrontery to call its 
passengers’ attention to the water pollu- 


tion—which is so total that the river 


occasionally catches fire—industry 


short- 


f 


ightedly elected to keep its record, 


mot the water, dean by silencing the 
commentators. But we feel sure that, as 
the polluted water of other cities becomes 
unfit for drinking, swimming. fishing 
and almost everything else, big business 


will decide to go into the cruise line itself, 
having perceived not merely the savings 
involved in refusing to clean up its own 
mess but the rewards of making people 
pay to look at it. 


Among our many correspondents is 
gentleman—signing himself Dr. Horace 
Naismith—who frequently demonstrates 
an uncanny ability to propose simplistic 
solutions to complex problems. W 
aren't certain that he possesses, as he 
daims, "a mind so keenly honed as to 
slice through traditionalist, intellectual 
and bureaucratic thinking straight to 
the core of things." but our stall psy- 
chologist and our chief of building secu 
тиу advise us to humor him. Naismith's 
latest dispatch outlines his 
novel approach to reducing street crime 
in America, 

The good doctor's solution to this 
national problem is to license munici 
pally owned television stations to broad- 
сам hardcore pornogr 


typically 


phic movies on 


weekend evenings between nine рм. 
and three a.M.—the hours when most 
muggings and robberies occur. Given 
the innate depravity of criminals and 


the prurient interests of most citizens, 
Dr. Naismith asserts, televised stag films 
would keep just about everyone oll the 
streets and out of trouble. during the 
high-crime periods. Not only would this 
scheme make the strects siler but it 
would stimulate the saloon economy, 
merate colortelevision sales and pei 
haps even induce sex criminals to spend 
more time at home with thei 
Not to mention the enormous 
of advertising revenue ап enli 
municipal government could 
from program  sponsors—-money that 
could be earmarked for cither raising 
police salaries or investigating police 
corruption. ‘There is even the possibility 
that a plummeting national ci 
would give Congress the cou 


famili 


es. 


mount 
tened 
realize 


ne rate 


21 


PLAYBOY 


22 


Dr. Naismith assures us tl 
soon iron out the two remaining prob- 
lems: how to circumvent FCC polia 
on television stag films and how to 
duce state le; tures to. put pornogra- 
phy on а local-option basis. 
g his studies of sexual rela- 
tions in Thailand, Dr. Opas Thamvanich 
concludes that the best temperature for 
loven that steamy sector of the 
Orient is 77 degrees Fahrenheit, And 
where did Dr. Thamvanich conduct his 
In Bangkok, of course. 

Best wishes for a speedy recovery to 
the gentleman who ran this “ E 
in the San Francisco Chronicle 


Discw 


researc 


wack at 
To all the beautiful ladies who I failed 
to keep dates with, my deep apologies 
In my temporary (1 hope) absence let 
not your deep sense of loyalty and love 
force you to abstain. Indulge, indulge, 1 
say. You will appreciate me more upon 
my return, 


Moneysworth, Ralph Ginzburg's. self- 
styled “Consumer Newsletter," reports 


umbers Studio Nudes 
nude you can bring to 


ment, digitally, in the privacy of 
your garret.” 

To prevent corporate confusion, this 
luful memo was passed resourcefully 
the line within California's. Hu- 
man Resources Development Department: 
“Due to a shortage of paper, the pink 
DE4156 will be coming out to the local 
office in green. These arc to be treated 
the a pink DE1156. One method 
of identifying these 4456s would 
write "PINK in large leiters 


be to 


A long hit to lelt field: The American 
Indian Movement filed a class-action 
suit against the Cleveland Indians in au 
effort to have the Indian logo removed 
as that Club's symbol. Next hits: the 
Adanta Braves and the Washington Red- 


haps it's a result of Phase Two, 


ucts says Happy Face sales have leveled 
aff, while Sad Face sales are picking up. 


Having now elected its first woman 


membe tory Schools’ 
Association has had to revise its constitu- 
tion, Re d n James Hornby 


explained the difficulty thusly: "We went 
through adding ' 
ever the word appeared. 


But we were stumped when we came to 


the final paragraph, which read, ‘Mem- 
bers should пу to promote intercourse 
among headmasters. ” 


cigarettes is to hav 
experiment conducted by Dr. C. L. 
of Glasgow, five of 13 heavy smokers 
quit after sipping an alcoholic extract of 
ats for nearly a month. The other eight 
were down to fewer than six cigarettes a 
day. No statistics on how many of the 13 
arc carousing with undesirables or sing- 
ing under lampposts, and Alcoholics 
Anonymous hasn't been heard from yet. 


The Detroit Sunday News carried this 
thought for remodelers in an article on 
saunas: “Many designers prefer western 
cedar as it docs not stain as readily a 
some other species, does not shrink, r 
tains its rance and aron 
and is cooler to sin on as it doesn't absorb 
as much hc; 


Neat trick: An issue of Show maga- 
zine included ап article titled “What 
Have T y Done to Christ in Films? 


And up front, where they give the cred- 
its, was writ, "Photograph of Jesus Christ 
from Culver Pictures, Ine.” 


This comfor news comes to us 
from а U.P.I. report оп General. Motors’ 
test of its new Experimental Safety Vehi- 
de; “ESV program manager William B. 
Larson reviewed the testing of the car in 
50-mph crashes and said the results of a 
full complement of dummies placed. in 
the car showed that all of them were 
killed, but some only slightly.” 


San Francisco columnist Herb € 
reports this sign sponed in the Drop 
Inn bar: FRIDAY NIGHT IS MOTHER'S NIGHT. 
ALL LADIES DESIRING TO BECOME MOTHERS 
ARE INVITED TO DROP IN. 


One of New York's finest sent us this 
tidbit about Manhattan's police crack- 


down on prostitution, which assignment 


is approp 
Ina 


tely referred to as the "pussy 
Idition to the routine pi 
now a personal question 
* for the girls to fill out after their 
arrest, including the question, "Why did 
you become a prostitute?” Our inform: 
ant reports answers ranging from “Why 
did you become a pig?” to "The Devil 
made me do it." 


possc. 
work, there 


om 


nai 


Washington, a stare whose agricul- 
tural products include hops, found itself 
suddenly swamped with requests for seeds 
and roots and information on the culti 
tion of hop plants. Since hops are a princ 
pal constituent of beer, the first suspicion 
as that home brewing had become an 


overnight fad. But мше officials soon 
traced the interest to an underground 
pamphlet called “A Culúvators Hand. 
book of Marijuana,” which claims that 
a “superior grass” can be devdoped by 


grafting Cannabis to hop vines. 
What a way to fly: A Tokyo travel 


agency has olfered a “porno tour of 
Europe.” The 15-day, $1300 package 
cludes the major pornographic att 


nd 


ART 


Those familiar with the grim, repres- 
sive record of the Soviet Ministry of 
be mildly surprised by So- 


the 1500. 
arts 


em exhibition of 
touring the U.S 
Jr's neither gray пог preachy: it’s almost 
frivolously bourgeois. Lenin said that 
t belongs to the people, and this is 
a people's show, full of kitsch. The hun- 
dreds of modem objects here—flowered 
rugs, painted plates, tall glass vases 
prove that the Russian masses are just 
about as tasteful as the American ma 
The entire exhibition, the largest ever 
sent abroad. by the Russi 
ngly des 


end Today, 


decorative now 


ses. 


"s, seems cun- 


ed ао please those of our 
countrymen who. they hate the 
Commies, just love Lawrence Welk 
"There are also many treasures here, but 
only the 15th Century icons, those fiercely 
holy paintings shimmering with gold, 
seem to have been chosen exclusively for 
their beauty. A bejeweled saddle is here 
simply because Ivan the ‘Terrible sat on 
it Some bits of Scythian gold, produced 
2500 ago by expatriate Greek 
crafismen, were probably included ju: 

because they're oll. А тейлее, peart 
encrusted boot in the exhibition seems to 
ight once 
Ме of 
Catherine the Great. But most of the 
objects are modern. and they're here be 
cause they sell—and not just in Russia 
If there are any tough. experimental 
tisans working now in Russia, they have 
been excluded. from this show, with all 


while 


years 


the fear of us individuality th: 
that term implies. Russia's politici 
seem to think that they have a win 


For past cultural exchanges, they hid be 
hind such middlemen as impresario Sol 
Hurok, but а welcoming address by Pre 
mier Kosygin is posted in this exhibition 
nd Madam Yekaterina A. Furtseva, min- 
ister of cultur: s and an import 
Soviet personage since the days of Stalin 
visited the show. While it's being seen in 
Washington, Los Angeles. Mi 
St. Paul, Chicago, Boston and New York's 
Metropolitan. Museum of Art (the Met is 


polis- 


Seagram's V.O. 
For people who want the best that life has to offer. 


They seem to do everything. And they do it right. Even when 
it comes to having a drink. It has to be Seagram's V.O. Very special. 
Very Canadian. Very right. Known by the company it keeps. 


CANADIA WHISKY — A BLEND OF SELECTED WHISXIES. SIX 
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Doral Open Champion 1969 
Hawaiian Open Champion 1971 
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Touring Professional, 

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my wardrobe. 

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Concept in beltless slacks, with 
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What I can say is this: If you 
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ALABAMA 
Richaré Bennett 

Voveman's 
Parisian Ail eres 
Parisian 
Vovemans 

Stout's Botn stores 


Montgomery Fannin a AI Sores 
КЕЧ “The Hub 
Montgomery Loveman's 
ALASKA 
Моше Kioplensicins 
ARIZONA 
бете Smitys Big Town Store 
Site Smutty: Bi Teun Store 
ARKANSAS 
КҮЧ Schrader's 
CALIFORNIA 
босо мег 
Mutbard-Bronley 
Cole's Ri Stores 
Bunama 
Casa Montana 
Сагиз 
оен Caliorne ЕЧ 
Danland Alters 
Dahiana Yop braver Sieh 
verde 
p көш МШЕ 
in Di Jon AI Sores 
puro Rochester Cicthing C 
"RI Sores 
Southern Corn Credins 
Southern Сонот. Norris E Frank 
Southern Санатта. Siverwocós 
çDLDRADO 
Souder The Regiment 


connecticut 
Kennedy's- Al Stores 


p Wortes Dep store 
-— 59 
“tt е8 
ЕЯ панама Sirnes 
anord ere Peet 
Bonora БЕЯ 
imcherter Regal Men's Shop- Ri Sires 
Voices ors Pest 
Чен London шег Co 
Natelzons Stones 
САНЯ 
Waterbury Rogers Peet 
DELAWARE 
бети doch Lang Саак 
ееп "brat Co 


DISTRICT OF COLUMBIA, 
Washinton Ge 


washington 


FLORIDA 
Gora cables 
Daytona Beach 
Hallandale 
Hallandale 
кигеп, 
НЕЯ 
Hollywood, 


Don Peters 
‘Larson 
улов: 

Lees Apparel 

Elsie Lee's Sond Dollar 
ey s Ail stores 
Johnson's tes Shop 
wey 

Pit Davis 

Jordan marsh ti os 

Baroni 

phil Davis 

Larry Hofman 
Lansons- Al Stores 


Мт Feach 
Mami Beach 
нако, Я 


Penaccla Pensacola Gayfer's—foth Seret 


Rivers Beach Forest's Nen e Shop. 

SU Petersburg Egerton & Moore 

Tallahassee Brown's Men's Wear 

Wier Fork Weys 
GEORGIA 

King Size Clothes 

кышт 

Tillman’ 

Frierson-McEver. 


тоза Sutherland Ltd. 


I0AMO. 


iio folis Brown & Gesas 
ино 

Aurora Lytton's 
Branton Phillips Men's wear, Inc 
Calumet Caty Baskin 
Charset cay хута 


вимо 
Benson Hsc САП Stores 
‘Cohn & Sera 
trie Clothing Al e 
утап & Son 
ters Jerome 
yw 
ма. Rothschild Aisne, 
ье Sores САП Stores 
"en's Store For Men 
AP 2 shops 
bien Canine 
p 
tre бийге 
rie бийге 
Mosentelder s ine 
[nos 
enn 

әш 


Cheage 
Des Phones 

East st Lous 
Ent Lous 


Park Forest yon 
Р The Beli Clothing £ Shoe House 

M 
Rock Island Mosenteider’s, inc. 
шоби trie Сите. 
Shane н. Hyman & Son 
Waukegan вая 
Waukeran Feinborg's Store Fer Men 
Waukegan Luton 
КШ Storey’s Men Wear 
Waukegan. Wictolat Stores 


INDIANA 
pros Daten and Payne 
Tome oriens 
КЕША эйе 
H toye шн 
Hd окт 
Ишт Meyers & Mery 
EM 

[M 

soos 

їр 

КЕЧ 

Noe 

Hen heey 

пени 

Sou ont 

Ter Have Meis Brothers o 
Ошм. ГРЕЕ 
ean res 
ee syngas ub 
Ern E 
бшп, Siete Hab le, 


Des Wants. Frarhels Got cres 
Des Homes. Kuchares— Bolh Stres 
Waterioo © palace Clotiers- Bom Stores 
KANSAS 
HG Todds Mens Wear 
Overignd Park The dores Store Co- 
буен Park Wolrschia s 
Dveflan Park 
Bree wage 
Frane Vilage 
Topera Cunningham Shicids 
таз "The Palace 
KENTUCKY 
Hopkinsville Wade's 
towne Levy fos. 
Хамзе Rodes 
Lousie Stewart Dry Goeds 
LOUISIANA 
Башти Arthur's 
Baton Route Cehn-Turner & Co. 
Baton Коше бошан 
Таене Rbdalla's— В Seres 
New Orleans Goechaur's 
New Orleans Stevens Alt aie 
New Опет Rubenstein Bros- 
MAINE 
Lesion LeBlare's 
олип Benois 
Se. Portland Kennedys 
MARYLAND 
шше vamturgers OT 
АЧ imborgers- Hl cns 
Biltmore билиг 
Stewarts M Sires 
Lawrence Reed Ud. All Sires 
MASSACHUSETI: 
Kennedy's- Al Stores 
Mallacis Al Stores 
Filere's 
в 
билсе 
Chest 
Ghestnut 
Оте 
Ран 
[s 


Lovtence. 


Forbes & malate ali зш 
‘Albert Steiger, nc. 


БЕ па ис: 
West Spingtild Yale С. 
куз ot Park буе 
Worcester Fiene's 
MICHIGAN 
nega 
Denson нт, Avenue Her Wat 
Beira чут ы 
Detrat Hughes Katener Sarin 
бешм. фа Place Mens Wear 
Detroit олат 
ЕЕ заета 
Detroit Jack Stevens Hi Stores 
per Jonnie Walker 
[o Troer s 
Fint A. M, Daison's AN Sores 
pu emn Squire Ап Stores 
roca Raps © тышда s Apparet 
Ge pide Wiliam Klein sre for ten 
ann wo 
reinen BL sini Mi Snes 
VT Clemens pm red 
Mt бетт "Teck E Marke 
КА бутш 
Royal Gat Todé's Уш 
Boy Dak Non Horns 
Sf Edward's Men's Shop shes 
шш Tona Sh 
St shoves Wales Big BT 


‘Southieli Van Hern's Men's езг М Siores 


E Chess 
D ren Van Dyke Cthiers iS 
MINNESOTA 

тищ 


ng 
Juste s - NE lores 
ЕЕ 
Young Guimion—Alt SIGS 


Feeneser Nünny's Men's Wear 
seront иЗ 
St Pout Сейчеч 


Сасе броне 
lenanat's Al Sores 


EE] Young Quinlan A Spes 
Wes S Po Pep iere Cato 
MISSISSIPPI 

sin 

[d 

юзо stevens Bom Stores 


Where-To-Buy-l2 Use 


mıssDURI 
aS Harty Smith Men's Wear 
Jeterson City 'Crarlinsky's 
Worse ty Edie acoso s 
Колун City The Jones Store Co. AN Stores 
ites Gey Киек Moret 
Wet The Palace 

city помемез ш 


Vern's Mens Wear 
Aronson s= Ai Stores 


Stix, Baer Lf 
"Wars - An lores 


E Cole's Clothing & Shoes 
NEBRASKA 
[o Ben тонга Воп Stores 
NEVADA 
Tis Veran Hargis & Frank 
Us vers Чексиз 
Riro Harna E Frank 
NEW HAMPSHIRE 
Bestond. Kennedy's 
NEW JERSEY 
Wallach Ail Store 
їзє ity "7 Jules For Nen & Young Men 
Bante Ci ‘Schulte Ine. 
ines "rat Ce 
Natelsons 
watt ne 
Tony Ruda 
Hedin shore 
udi 
неу Аа 
КЕЧ теа 
Prima gos 
Рита He-man ша 
Brame бейш 
Рута Stern Brothers Stores 
Pere Sach Lang Clothes- Al Stores 
БТ Nattisons 4. kr 
Trenton, Jack's Custom Shop АЙ Stores 
emen olin frank 
pm Fick! Brothers 
site Weser 
КЕ BEB lors 
NEW mexico 
oeque Strombergs 
NEW YORK 
eld Brothers А! store 
Oe D Lamya AlN Sores, 
Wallacis Ai Stores 
tony Kennedy's 
боп George Leonard 
ооа He-Man Shops 
БЕЖ неад она 
Euri The Wm. Hengere Се Ali Slo! 
Б The силат Co. A 
[xr] verde Hens Shop 
Я "bs ens Shep 
Seb MAC 
nhan le Man Shops 
йиш. LI Wars 
брит, H G, пиры 
hea тик cay Browning Fi Ave. 
ew York Су НИСУ 
Hew York Ey Mr. Costar Ute. 
hen York ty Ropers Peet 
[o Ross Mens Weir 
Е riens 
heiter отобуз 
Rochester ЕИ 
Rochester 
por 
Spese 
Valey Stream КАЧ 
ут бн natetsons stones 
отет теписи Clothes 
Voters я 
NORTH CAROLINA 
боюн ‘Beth Dept. Store Аи Stores 
rate. Worms art Co. бу 
Suman i 
aram. 
Burham 
Greeniboro 
Bion 
Morenos City 
New bern H 
[43 Nudson-Bal £j 
Mitten Payne's 
шл Siem Hine-Bagby Co.—All Stores 
NORTH DAKOTA 
Pus Straus Co. 
Giana Forks Straus Go. Co. 
oniwo 
Aaron Noch's- А Stoves 
т The Harvard А Stores 
cina RES Pogue ca. 
E Harry’s King е Clothes 
elind 
E 
p 
[ur 
[o 
DKLAHOMA 
fron Gy 
Sine Gly 
Bora Gy 
Tulsa 
precon 
лете Rosenblatts 
inr Жошы 


INNSYLVANIA 
Sein Fohlen Gress & Moyer 
‘Oris of Bethlehem 
Mecaeren's 

"Star Bros 


ornetur 
ЕЕН 
осе 


Carton Men's Shops 

Artow Stere 
Dianong & CAL Siei 
elu. Cimbets 


REACTS Card — Page 207. 


PENNSYLVANIA (Cont) 
Рет Jackson E Moyer 


| эт 


КИЧ Morello -Al Siores 
Pelin ^ Jacob Rect's Sons An Sn 
[M Slrawbriege & Clothier 


ur Merman Style 
Tor 


Stou sbre De Vive-Queresimo. 
Upper Darty "Bri Co. 
RHODE ISLAND. 
Kennedy’s—All Stores 
vicit Ca Bll Stere 
Cramton Га 
Eat Prowieva булшу 
en y 
ten GIy iut 
Newport Bonne 
Gonneily's 


Watch 
ef warek 


SDUTH CAROLINA 


ее, in's 
Germeke Heyward Mapen Co. 
ile Beach Milton e Men's Shop 
SOUTH DAKOTA 
Seis Fats Norman's Men's Wear 
TENNESSEE 
Бато The Courthouse Ltd. 
Enzibetton The Courthouse Li 
Greenevile The Courthouse Lt 
тарон The Courthouse ыб: 
Мета  Golesmiti's- All Stores 
Метра Lanshy Brothers АП Slaves 
метин Pirka ok Ce. Bcth Sores 
Menus Stag Men's shop. 
Navi. Cain Sloan 
Navia Everett Holzapfel 
Dak ge Savers 
Texas 
К немеее 
Bennie Bhickburn Eros. 
p кас Wilians Man's Shop 
po Blorquist-Clork Alt slores 
host Merritt Schacter & Brown 
Al Sores 
p 
pr 
Bronnsvile J. & 0. Men's Wear 
Coleman Tie Mar's Shop. 
Corsicana Harris E Jacobs 


љу маса А Seles 

ing Sire Cities 

Jas. K Wilson Stores 

yds Campbell 
yde Camp 

Cary Мент Wear 

[ Stes 


Houston Fole's- hi Stores 
fcn Mae Mens wer 
louston ng Sire Clothes 
Houston  Leopeld, Price & Relie “All stores 
Houston Norlen- Dato 41 Sores 
Houston fidners All Sicres 
мү ‘Gals Man shop 
oea The Megs shop 
Son Antemo Баев АТ Sores 
‘San Antena. doseprva АП Storey 
EL BENT. oH 
SAM 2 MT ine. 
Hurwitz Man's Shop 
falls Muetuerberger’s en's & 
oys Wear 
UTAH 
Sal Lake City 
San Lane Gay 


ета 
Annie 
Belington 
злее 
натро 


che 
Revert News 
непе News 
пом The Hub- A Siret 
Norfolk Shálman's -Ai Stores 
Bosch. 

[n 
p 
иртә Beach 
Wythe 


жазинотон 
E 
Troma 


WEST VIRGINIA 


Kioptensteins 


veli Heme Sop 
Meets 


denes Inc. All eres 


Eom Sa 
менон 

Е Eram 
p Ms 
ERR emm 
Bum aes Ч 
pecu ск үт 
Шш эшч E 
5 сы 


Muaautee Sehmill-Drlow-Stumpls- HI Stores 
Manatee Walkers їй: AN Stores 
КЗ ЖА Close 


Г DeBye's Al Stores 
PUERTO RICD 

fio Pets Puerto Rice Elegante 
E Genzaler Padin АРЕСТ 
EX "Tops АП Stores 
Stuer Gentleman 
REPUBLIC OF PANAMA 

Panama City. Diorvett Stores 


25 


PLAYBOY 


hoping for a chance to show treasures from 
the Hermitage), a reciprocal exhibit—of 
computers, Princess phones and such— 
ll be touring the U.S. S. R. 


BOOKS 


Wolfgang Wickler's The Sexual Cod. 
The Social Behavior of Animals and Men 
(Doubleday) is a provocative contribu- 
Чоп to the budding science of ethology. 
Wicklers major. | Biologi 
determined. behavior does not 
man nor any other animal. Behavior keeps 
changing—it is the mechanism by which 
animals adapt to new environments—and. 
changes in physical structure follow 
bel 1 changes. The implications of 
this view are important. I behavior is so 
plastic, then alternation of sexual roles, 
utilization of sexual organs for purposes 
other than procreation, the existence of 
a wide variety of sexual and social be- 

i as breathing. Our 
nd femaleness can 
then be understood аз deriving from the 
need for a division of labor in carly 
human societies. JE that need. disappears, 
gues Wickler, the segregation of 
roles may go the way of the dodo. 
Flawed only by a heavy-handed attempt 
to beat bund horse of theologi- 
cal morality, The Sexual Code sugg 
that appeals to the court of natural Taw 


the 


would encourage greater sexual freedom 


and beh and so 
tion. Neither so wise nor so 
marked by an irritating tone of conde- 
scension, is Desmond Morris’ intimate 
Behavior (Random House). Despite his 
background in zoology, Morris seems to 
misunderstand the lessons of evolution. 
ced that there is an immutable 
n nature, he regards Homo sa- 
as the final. produ evolu- 
process. Instead of questioning 
the dilferem effects of various types of 
human behavior—differences in child- 
techniques, in amount of tactile 
contact, in relative isolation or 
bility of infant—and their possible 
adaptive significance, Morris appears to 
that context is irrelevant; the 
behavior that. produces emotional disor 
der in опе culture will produce simi 
disorder in others. He seems inordin 
ly fond of eliciting gasps of surprise 
fro e audience. Hence, he 
equates adult activities with thei 
tile correlates: A fur coat is the 
substitute for a mother's body; ci 
satisfy a need for unrequited oral 
faction: courtship is nothing more than 
a repetition of the pattern of bonding 
and detachment that marks the mother- 


assume 


satis- 


child relationship. No one can argue 
against Morris. basic point that human 


beings need love, physical contact and 
асу. But his simplistic reductions 


offer little understanding of the thou- 
sands of patterns by which these ba 
needs are satisfied to produce different 
Kinds of adults. 


Ostensibly, The Boys of Summer (Harper 
& Row) by Коре n, is about old 
baseball players and what befalls them. 
alter their skills wither from age (the 
title comes from a Dylan Thomas line 
“I see the boys of summer in their 
ruins"). But it is also about growing up 
in America and the conflict of values ii 
fe. In 1952, when Kab 
t a point in life 
one is through with boyhood but 
as not yet discovered how to be a man 
—he was assigned to cover the Brooklyn 
Dodgers for the New York Herald Trib- 
unc. These Dodgers were the first 
gated pro team, with a speci 
players like Duke Snider and Jackie 
Robinson, Roy Campanella ard Gil 
Hodges, Pee Wee Reese and Joe Black, 
а team remarkably close in sp 
the divergence of their origins. They 
were, as Kahn explains, "a natio 
team, with a country in thrall, irresisti- 
ble and unable to beat the Yankees. 
Kahn spent only two years with the 
Dodgers, but the boys of summer re- 
т: d in his blood. "How are the years 
with then he wondered more than a 
decade later. The central portion of his 
book is devoted to revisits with these old 
Dodgers—Carl Erskine, the pitcher, oc- 
cupied at home with a Mongoloid son; 
Billy Cox, the third baseman, beaten 
down to tending bar in an American 
Legion hall; Carl Furillo, the strong- 
aimed right fielder, still a rage over 
the treatment he thinks he received 
from baseball; Jackie Robinson, shaken. 
to the core by the violent death of hi 
son, Jackie, Jr. But it is Kahn's sto 
too—his boyhood in Brooklyn, in a 
home of self-conscious intellectuals: 
learning а trade as a newspaperman (a 
segment that should become a text for 
ilism schools); the love of the son 
his father, whose collapse on a street 
ahn describes in a moving passage: 

“The sidewalk w: 
Pebbled cement зс 
A 


ме- 


apes а twitching face. 
an deserves privacy at the end, and 
sihesia. Surely my father had earned. 
that for a gentle life.” Roger Kahn has 
used the game of baseball to tell some- 
thing about himsell—and all of us. 

Only now, well over a quarter century 
after the event, do the British make the 
stunning disclosure that for the greater 
part of World War Two, “by means of 
the double-agent system, we actively ran 
d connolled the German espionage 
system in this country.” What is more, 
they prove it in an authorized, often 
thrilling and s deftly veiled ac- 
count writen immediately after the war 


but only now released under the tile 
The Double-Cross System in the War of 1939 
fo 1945 (Yale University). The author is 
J.C. Masterman, a former vice-chancellor 
of Oxford University, who worked in 
British Intelligence but, faithful to his 
x, carefully avoids saying exactly 
what he did. The take-over of the Germa 
espionage system was achieved by degrees, 
is were dropped. by parachute or 
hore from submarines, most of them 
were quickly picked up and offered a 
choice—imprisomment (or presumably 
Worse) or am opportunity to cooperate 
with the British by telling all they knew 
and then accepting Brit control in 
sending back misle: nformation to 
the fatherland. So the apparatus was 
built up methodically, with the Germans 
paying for it to the ul tune of 
about £85,000. Eventually 
being totally hoodwinked. In 1944, Hitl 
and Rommel were convinced that the 
nding in Normandy was а feint and that 
the real invasion was coming in the Pas 
de Calais. In January and ty ol 
1945, controlled. agents sent back such 
misleading data about where V-2 rockets 
were landing that their range was 
moved eastward about two miles а week 
nd ended well outside the London re- 
gional boundary. The antics of agents 
Enjoying such noms de double cross as 
bo (a Spanish genius who was 
warded the M. B. E. by his British 
friends and the Iron Cross Second Class 
by his German dupes), Mutt 
Teapot, Treasure (an 
temperamental woman). yele, Wea 
sel and Zigzag add up то fascinating 
reading. Mov kers ought to be able 
to live for years on the exploits recorded. 
by the aptly named Masterma 

The Word (Simon & Schuster), Irving 
Wallace's latest novel, concerns the dis 
covery of a so-called fifth Gospel written 
by onc of Jesus brothers, which indi- 
cates that Christ survived the Golgotl 
ordeal and died in Rome years later. 
Wallace's version of Jesus is reminiscent 
of Alec Guinness as Fagin: large nose, 
thick lips. pock-marked fice and а limp. 
The Byzantine plot revolves around the 
mi the: chacolog 
ical discovery the real McCoy or a hoas? 
Steven Randall, a PR man hired by an 
international publishing syndicate 10 
promote their forthcoming filth Gospel 
Bible, gets deeper and deeper into the 
problem, tracking down liars and fakes 
and forgers and double-crossers of every 
stripe. Randall's detective work is r 
plete with exclamation-point surprises. 
Unfortunately, W: ids it hard to 


ter of a Is the 


ticity 


ace fi 


waste the least morsel ol his research, 
even trotting whose 
sole function is to recite odds and ends 


(‘Do you know that the New Test 
credits Jesus 
E 


ment 
ith exactly 47 miracles? 
he novel is padded with minileciures 


When Cliff Richey takes off his Purcells 
he puts on his Purcells. 


Cliff Richey wears Purcells off the court. 
And on. 

So before he takes on the toughest 
pros in tennis, he takes off his 
Jeather Purcell RaceArounds. "54 4 f 

Then he puts on his on-the- 1 | 
court, rugged Purcells. The 
ones he wears in championship 
tennis matches. 

The ones with the tough, 
durable insole. 

(Cliff has never had a Purcell 
insole breakdown, and he often skids 
to a stop and can burn out the bottom 
of a shoe in five days.) 

A good insole, to Cliff is what comfort's 
all about. Ours is the best he’s found. 

In fact, he says this shoe is so comfortable, 
you forget you have it on. 

Which is a good way for you to 
remember Purcells. 

Wherever you buy better shoes. 


27 


PLAYBOY 


—everything from a thumbnail biogra- 
phy of Johann Gutenberg to a summary 
of the carbon-14 dating process. And, of 
course, there are bulous Wallace 
women, none middleaged nor plain. 
Alas, the novelist seems to be running 
out of ways to describe them. "Angela 
Monti was literally, breath-taking" 
serves as the introduction to his princi- 
pal female character. The Word: old 
wine in a new bottle (of the screw-top 


Before Masters and Johnson there was 
Kinsey, before Kinsey there was 
nobody—at least nobody who had 
ously tested prevailing theories of hu- 
man sexuality against empirical data. In 
ng 18,000 sexual histories through 
1 interviews and publishing his 
works on male and female sexual 
г, Kinsey collided with an Ameri- 
can scientific establishment chat still 
regarded sex as taboo, Professional critics 
focused their attacks on Kinsey's loose 
mpling techniques and statistical na- 
vetê, especially in hi les. 
‘The admitted moralists simply denounced 
з ап agent of the Devil who would 
y with his evidence tha 
everyone is doing it”—meaning sex: 
, extr ital, homosexual or 
otherwise “unnatural.” Kinsey's work not 
only endured, however, but paved the 
way for today's sophisticated research into 
the psychology and physiology of sex as 
a normal, natural human function. Now 
two of his former tes have under- 
taken to supply the histori ad bio- 
graphical background largely missing 
irom the millions of words written 
about Kinsey, who died 1956, his 
institute and his sensational reports. 
Dr. Wardell Pomeroy apprenticed himself 
to Kinsey in the earliest days of the sex- 
research program, becoming a coauthor of 
the reports and, today, a sex expert in 
his own right. In Dr. Kinsey and the Insti- 
tute for Sex Research (Harper & Row), 
Pomeroy recounts his many years on the 
Kins а а its work, tech- 
niques and battle for respectability. In 
Kinsey: A Biography (Indiana University), 
Cornelia V. Christenson skims the insti. 
Kin- 
sey's personal Ше and professional carcer, 
Neither book devotes much space to Ki 
scys findings, which have long since 
become public knowledge, but together 
they supply nearly everything you ever 
wanted to know about Professor Kinsey 
and didn’t know whom to ask. 

Shepherd (How lo Succeed in Busi- 
ness Without Really Trying) Mead has 
launched a mostly hila 
on wom 
mon & Schuster). Mead's т 
all the flagrant perqu 


and 


research on m 


soci 


tute’s activities and concentrates oi 


tes of being an 
American female, from alimony to longer 


life expectancy: “How many wome 
frogmen, test pilots . . . firemen, G 
Prix racers . . . people who get shot out of 
cannons? Is it any wonder men are in the 
minority? Is a miracle апу of us are 
left at all" How many women, asks 
Mead, are eager to leave their automated 
kitchens to play right field, dig ditches, 
collect garbage, mine coal, police college 
towns? He argues that it is the male 
who is the exploited. partner, the sex ob- 
ject and plaything of the insatiable and 
better-equipped female: "The male all- 
purpose tool is to the female clitoris as 
a muzzle-loading flintlock is to a ma- 
chine gun, a Kitchen sink to a pleasure 
palace. Our poor utilitarian plumber's 
helper has to serve as а drainpipe and 
seed planter—and only incidentally and 
occasionally as a pleasure wand, And, 
like a shaver battery, it has по power or 
spark without a long period of recharg- 
ing." Probably Mead's ultimate assertio 
of male superiority is his sense of chi 
alry—a burden that he disdains to ab- 
jure: “Treat her like a lady and it will 
help her act like one. Set her a good exam- 
ple!” Let us all take а leaf, of the fig 
variety, from Mr. Mead's genilemanly 
approach. 


Ic is саму in the election year of 1976. 
Richard Nixon has taken to uying to 


sneak out of the White House in the 
middle of the night because—as his psy- 


сїйїїм, Wolfgang Kissinger, explains 
to Pat—his inferiority complex tells him 
that though he is capable of running for 
the Presidency, he is not able actually to 
be President. As Nixon withdraws from 
reality, Agnew takes over behind the 
Scenes. Get These Men Ош of the Hot Sun 
(Arbor House) begins there with a могу 
of “future history" that is awkward as 
a novel yet significant because author 
Herbert Mitgang carries weighty creden- 
tials: He is a member of the editorial 
board of The New York Times and 
president of the Authors Guild. Mitgang 
eschews both the gloves of satire and the 
mask of farce. Instead, he hammers out 
a story of an America run by a political 
cabal oozing morali behind a 
façade of Alarmed for 
democracy, three middleaged veterans of 
a World War Two counterespionage team 
plot to infilirate one of their number, 
callege professor David Pringle, into the 
White House, where, if necessary, he can 
assassinate Agnew. Pat and Mamie mas- 
nnd an Agnew-David Eisenhower 
ticket that beats Humphrey-Connally, 
and the Presidentelect firms up his pro- 
more support for the Greck colo- 


т 


ter 


the Bill of Rights, with particular 
tion to the First Amendment. Yer it's only 
when Agnew presents his Cabinet on 


atten- 


n—McGeorge Bundy as Secretary 
с, Joe Alsop at Del ind 
1 Walt Rostow (“who 
°) as Secre- 
Pringle feels 
compelled to act. This is a clumsy book 
whose macabre humor would be less 
Macabre and more humorous were its 
characters not all too real, 

About halfway through The 30,000-Mile 
Ski Roce (Dial), skier-author Peter Miller 
explains the significant differences i 
technique required by the three major 
events in competitive skiing: the down- 
hill, the sl nt slalom. 
Like a skier determined to run all three 
simultancously, Miller has attempted. to 
write an exposé, a character study and 
an adventure narrative at the 
time. The result is predictable: 
comes а cropper, but excitingly. Race is 
the story of the 1970-1971 world tour in 
which the top international skiers com- 
peted for the coveted World Cup. Fron 
Val-d'Isère to St-Moritz, from Kitzbühel 
to Sugarloaf, Miller follows the fortunes 
and misfortunes of the racers, focusing on 
the Americans among them. As long as it 
stays on the slopes, the book is superb. 
Split second by split second, Mill 
you down the runs with the skiers so 
graphically that you can hear the wind 
hissing past, feel the crunch as a ski tip 
nicks a slalom gate. Not so successful, how- 


lom and the gia 


acters of the American skiers, who come 
off as remarkably immature. And when he 
attacks the background figures of h 
ski racing—equipn , publ 
cists and journali ials and. coaches, 
the racer-chaser girls who want to bed 
down with the champions—the book 
becomes a litany of minor complaints 
(the skiers aren't invited to the postrace. 
paries). Miller clearly agrees with the 
who feel they are victims 
ski establish ordered 
around like professionals but treated like 
amateurs Yet can the American. World 
Cup score, four wins out of 47 races, be 
blamed on everybody but the skiers? Still, 
for all its shortcomings, Miller's book, 
with over 100 action photographs, will see 
a ski bulf through the longest lift waiting 
line. 


ne 


The most striking feature of Brock 
Brower's loose, elliptical novel The Late 
Grec Creature (Atheneum) is that its 
sources seem almost exclusively cin 
matic. Brower introduces actual characters 
from the publishing world into the pe- 
riphery of his nightmare comedy, which 
concerns the filming of a Hollywood 
horror flick and the efforts of an. Eastern 
magazine writer 10 put together а de 
tive profile of its мага classic bogey 
man named Simon Moro, who seems to 
be a composite of Bela Lugosi, Boris 
Karloff and Lon Chaney, Sr. Celebrated 


© 1972, BROWN а WILLIAMSON TOBACCO CORP. 


1.2 mg. nicotine av. per cigarette, 
FTC Repori Aug. 71. 


20 


NR 


THE BIGGEST SELLING 


VS.THE BIGGEST SELLING 


This year, millionsof Americans will 
go out to buy their very first small car. 

Many will find themselves confused 
as to which small car is best. 

Which is why we think it might be 
helpful for you to know that in Europe, 
where they've been comparing small cars 
for three generations, they buy more Fiats 
than anything e 

Volkswagens included. 

One of the big reasons for this is the 
Fiat 128, which we're bringing to Ameri 
for the first time this vear 

And to give you an idea of how good 
it is, here's how it stacks up, point by point, 
against America’s favorite.the Volkswagn 


But the Super Beetle. 
OUR PERFORMANCE VERSUS 
THEIR PERFORMANCE. 
Themost obvious difference between 


n. 
And not just the regular Volkswagen. 


128 and the Volkswagen Super 
Beetle is the engine. 

Ours isin front—theirs is in back. We 
have front wheel drive they have rear 
wheel drive. 

Front wheel drive gives you better 


handling because the wheels that are moy- 
thatare turn- 


ng the cararealso the whe 
ing the car. And also because pulling is a 


much more efficient way to move some- 


thing than pushing. 

Front wheel drive also gives you 
better traction on ic 
last year, the Fiat 128 won the Canadian 
Winter Rally, which is run over ice and 
snow the likes of which we hardly ever see 
in the States.) 

You'll also notice, if you glance at the 
chart on the right,that under pa: 
tions the Fiat accelerates faster than the 
Volkswagen. (If you've ever passed a giant 


snow. (As proof, 


sing condi- 


truck on a highway, you know how impor- 
tant thatis.) 

Now, since enginesalonedonot deter 
mine how well a car performs, there are a 
few other subjects we'd like to cover. 

For instance, the Fiat 128—whichhas 
self-adjusting front disc brakes -can 
bring you to a complete stop in a shorter 
distance than the Volkswagen. which does 
not have disc brakes. 

‚ the Fiat 128 has rack and 
pinion steering, which is a more positive 
em generally found 


tires; the Volkswagen doesn't. 
OUR ROOM VERSUS THEIR ROOM. 
The trouble with most of the small 
cars around is that while they help solve 
the serious problem of space on the road, 


they create a serious problem of space in- 
side the car. 

And while the Volkswagen is far from 
the worst offender in this area, it still 
doesn't give you anywhere near the 
amount of space you get in the Fiat 128. 

‘As you can see on the measurement 
chart, the Fiat 128 is a full 10 inches 
shorter on the outside than the Volks- 
wagen. Yet it has more room on the inside 
than an Oldsmobile Cutlass, let alone the 
Volkswagen. 

Compared to the Super Beetle, it's 
wider in front, wider in back, and 5 inches 
wider between the front and back seat. 
Which should be good news for your 
knees. 

And in the trunk of the Fiat 128, 
where lack of room is taken for granted 
in small cars, you'll find 13 cubic feet of 
room. In the Volkswagen you'll find 9.2. 


Manufacturer’ 


OUR COST VERSUS THEIR COST. 

Aside from the fact that the Fiat 128 
costs $167 less than the Super Beetle, 
there's another cost advantage we're 
rather proud of. According to tests гип by 
the North American Testing Company, 
the Fiat 128 gets better gas mileage than 
the Super Beetle. 

Now we don't for one minute expect 
that, even in the face of all the aforemen- 
tioned evidence, you will rush out and 
buy a Fiat. All we suggest hat you take 
the time to look at a Fiat. 

Recently, the president of Volks- 
wagen of America was quoted as saying 
that 42% of all the people who buy Volks- 
wagens have nevereven looked at another 
kind of car. 

And we think that people who don't 
look before they buy never know what 
they've missed. 


мев retail price, POE Transporta 


ACCELERATION 
50 mph- 
20-50 mph - 
40-70 mph. 
40-70 mph : 

BRAKING 
20-0 mph 


20-0 mph .. 
fiy mph 
60-0 mph 
BUMPER TO BUMPER 


FRONT SEAT-SIOE TO E 
5350in. 


PLAYBOY 


32 


as the monstrous Ghoul- 
of litle girls, Moro 
foolishly lives to become a sinister leg- 
end, and finds it difficult to perpe- 
trate any horror equal to the real life 
contemporary Hollywood and New 
York. But he ties, crowning his ofl- 
screen exploits by displaying an unlucky 
prop man’s severed finger on the To- 
night show. There's more, much more: 
putdowns and plot parodies and seduc- 
tions and a series of baroque questions 
("Were The Invisible Man's excreta 
also invisible?”), Brower at his best sug 
gests а younger Nabokov who has been 
nurtured on a diet of creepy old movies. 


in film archive 
gantua, a molester 


In the Thirties and Forties, William 
Saroyan's novels (The Human Comedy), 
short stories (The Daring Young Man on 
the Flying Trapeze) and plays (The Time 
of Your Life) were bright rockets in the 
literary skies, filled with an innocent, 
roistering love of life. But money trou- 
bles. marriage troubles and work troubles 
dogged Saroyan (or vice versa) and the 
great promise never matured. His new 
book, Places Where I’ve Done Time (P 
uses the homes, hotels, ships. 
offices, bordellos that were meaningful to 
him as pegs on which to hang autobio- 
graphical reflections, He bobs back and 
forth from boyhood to adulthood, from 

lure to success 
ad there are old 
especially in vignettes 
of his carly Armeniandlavored life in 
California; but though he attempts to 
maintain the illusion of devilma 
enthusiasm for life in all its aspect 
laughter sounds sadly hollow. 
соге L. Jackson's last book, Blood 
in My Eye (Random House), completed 
shortly before his fatal failure to escape 
from San Quentin, was intended as а 
revolutionary weapon. Written in the 
form of didactic letters, it is a Ma 
Leninist call for violent 
set in motion by a black le: 
cadre. Jackson was utterly convinced 
the revolution “for new relati 
ships between. men" had to be preceded 
by violent confrontation. Even if it re- 
sulted in repression, that, too, would be 
positive—"a necessary stage in the de- 
velopment of revolutionary conscious 
ness." And even if the violent revolution 
ultimately n America, the rest of 
the world would benefit through the 
reduction of this country to a wasteland. 
Jackson was so consumed by this dark 
vision that he took great pride in the 
death of his 17-year-old brother, Jona- 
when the latter, armed, failed to 
three black convicts from а San 
Rafacl courtroom. George Jackson's final 
revolutionary testament is profoundly sad 
dening—an elect he did not intend. 
This man had made remarkable use of 
his long prison years to strengthen his 


t- 


dership 


lec 


mind and body, but his bitterness 
injustice so distorted his intelligence as 
to lead him to construct a self-fulfilling 
prophecy of death. The book is part 
of the stubborn odyssey of a man with 
extraordinary potential in whom rage 


transcended reason. His legacy remains 
dangerous, A minor but instructive 
complementary work of autobiography. 


The Education of Sonny Carson (Norto 
by Mwlimu Imiri Abubadika (the au- 
thor's Muslim name), tells of а survivor 
of black militancy. Carson, who became 
known as a leader of the Brooklyn 
CORE, which eventually split from the 
ational body, relates a by-now-familiar 
but nonetheless allecting story of an 
dividual black's refu to submit 10 
institutional racism. Carson could have 
suled for a moderately “successful” 
$ life style, despite a prison 
record, but he chose to become 
munity organizer instead and was promi 
nent in the Ocean Hill-Brownsville 
battle for community control of the 
schools. His book ends just before that 
defeat, having explained how he 
hieved a positive sense of self 
becoming part of a collective 
for identity. Had C 
time in prison 
too, might have been driven to 
destruction, There is, of course, no guar 
antee that he might not vet be so dri 

Also noteworthy: The Physiology of Taste 
(Knopl), the masterpiece of the 19th 
Century philospher of food, Anthelme 
BrillacSavarin, is available in an elegant 
new tr n by M. F. К. Fisher. Th 
erudite and lively work abounds in 
ecdotes and aphorisms on such matters as 
fasting and feasting. 
tion, obesity and thinness and the erotic 
effects of truffles. It makes one hunger 
for more. 


com. 


DINING-DRINKING 


New York City seems то be experienc- 
ing a soup renaissance. La Potagerie оп 
Fifth Avenue near 46th Street, a хее 
colorfully tiled, selfservice caravansary, 
offers generous 14-ounce helpings ol soup 
as the only entree—and in stunning di 
versity. Depending on the day, you cin 
choose from about 15 souperb selections, 


includi nt Gingolph's Savoy Alp 
Soup (cream base with chunks of chicken 
breast and mushrooms). Upper Income 


Bean Soup (black bean with diced ham 
nd potato), Wall Street Chowder (a kind 
of Manhattan. clam chowder but light on 
the tomato; plenty of clams and unex- 
pected morsels of turnip, squash and 
кр Ith Arrondissement Soup (on- 
ion with baked cheese crust), Four and 
a Half Hour Lentil Soup and even Fruit 
Grog. served only in the summer. Po 
s fixed price, $2.25 at lunch, 52.50 


for dinner and башга also covers 
bread or croissant, mugs of coffee and a 
mple dessert (he crème caramel is a 


winner) or fresh fruit and port du salut. 
Domestic red and white wines by the glass 
and Lowenbrau on tap are available. 


When you've passed through the servin 
line, a comely young lady will tote your 
food to your table on a Chinese-red lac- 
quered tray. No tipping allowed. Hours 
re 11 A.M. to 1H P.M. Mond: 
i Laat. to 9 PAL оп 
Jloscd Sundays. No reservations necessary. 
Further evidence of New York's swing to 
soups may be seen at The Front Porch, a 
new eatery set in an old apothecary shop 
at the corner of West Fourth and West 
Тир streets in the Village. The attempt 
here is for “homemade.” and while it's 
not like Mother used to make—let’s face 
по commercial venture сап be 
Front Porch docs an honest, 
tive job. Fresh produce is used where [casi- 
ble, the whipped cream is bona fide, not 
shot from guns, and the fruit breads are 
baked on the premises. The heart of the 
menu is soup—three offerings a day, 
drawn from a library of over 140 recipe 
A thick soup, such as Bonaparte Stew 
(beef, prunes, wine, vegetables), is served 
with white or whole-wheat kalian bread; 
cold soup—Plum Sour Cream, Spinach 
Vichyssoise, Bombay Refresher (apple. с 
conut, zapped with curry)—is served with 
uit bread: and a potage, maybe Anneta 
Anghelerie's (peas, mushrooms, parsley), 
with black bread. The des t The 
Front Porch are Southern style and strictly 
ос. MeNcury's. Miracle, for example, 
delicious chocolate mousse layered 
with bourbonsoaked cake and pecan 
Soups are 51.50 for a large bowl, 95 cents 
for an appetizer portion, Desserts are 95 
cents, with many large enough for two. A 
sandwich of the day, chili and beverages 
(no liquor) complete the limited me 
Open 12 0 row. Sunda! 
Tuesda 
19 ast 
Closed. Mondays. No reservations are ne 
essary here, either. 


MOVIES 


On one level, te Boucher (The Butcher) 
might easily qualify as a fine thriller, 
the sort of hairraiser that whoops to a 
climax when a sexy schoolmistress in a 
French provincial village finds herself 
alone at midnight—the only woman still 
alive who can positively identify the 
homicidal m: ıt large in the district. 
Very little is missing here, in terms of 
sheer suspense. But trust Claude Chabrol, 
film maker whose style is characterized 
by restraint and precision, to add resonant 
undertones from beginning to end. 
Chabrol creates suspense not through 
shock but through subtle and s gly 
human contradictions; he delivers a wist- 
ful love story about the tentative, hopeless 


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relation 
and a seductive schoolmarm who has 
been tying for years to avoid decp 
emotional involvements. Playing the 
teacher, exotic Stephane Audran (Mme. 
Chabrol offscreen and frequently starred 
in her husband's films) mixes it sophisti- 
cated blend of fear, s. frustration 
and all per 
Tecly complemented by Jean Yanne’s 
sympathetic performance as the butcher, 
а returned army veteran who has spent 15 
up meat for the troops. 
While Chabrol clearly implies a connec 
tion between the sanctioned butchery of 
battle and the dark deeds men do quite 
apart from war, he never stoops to ser 
monizing. Le Boucher is too fashionably 
amoral for that. yet it speaks eloquently 
about violence by catching the rhythm 
of life and death in a small French town 
where even multiple murder cannot seri 
ously disturb the status quo. 


hip berween a psychopathie killer 


Clint Eastwood ду Dirty Horry lends 
his chiseled profile and pompadour to 
the role of a San 
tive who ultimate 
badge because the law is so solt on 

iminals. With Eastwood playing the 
silent type that has made him 
king at the box ollice, Dirty Harry wraps 
а vaguely reactionary argument. Гог law 
and order 
ment packag 
case is that 


ncisco police detec 


throws away his 


їїр-гоагпщ emer 


rhe gist of the farferched 
crazy killer gets off. scot 
free on a legal technicality—after he 
has committed two sniper murders, kid 
naped and slain а H-yearold girl, writ- 
ten ransom notes demanding $200,000 
beaten Eastwood nearly unconscious and 
shot another officer during the рауой 


Eastwood quite naturally considers the 
aw to be idiotic and is confirmed in 
opinion when the madman strikes 
again, seizing a busload of school chil 
dren (what else) as hostages. Director 
Don Siegel seems almost persuaded that 
Dirty Harry’s violent actton conveys am 
important me 
If so. hi 
tone of someone calling out the 


€ for contemporary so 


message has the discon 


The avantgarde cinema of cruelty 
takes another leap forward—or back 
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which provoked a minor canse célébie 
at Jast year's Cannes Film Festival 
seems certain то ацга those dogged 
underground. moviegoers who have seen 
El Topo a doren times. Written and di 
recied by the exiled Spanish playwright 
Femando Arrabal. Via la Muerte adds 
nothing to the art of film, save buckets 
of blood and guts to zap an audience thar 
might grow. drowsy otherwise. The story 
autobiographical in tonc, is a kind of 
psychodrama about a 12-year-old boy 
growing up in Spain during the Civil 
War. His father, a Communist. has been 


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PLAYBOY 


36 


uted and the boy fears, detests and 
desires his widowed mother, who evidently 
informed on her own husband. Fleshly 
fantasies concerning mom 1 а sex- 
ually repressed young aunt аге among th 
mildest of the film's forays into the sub- 
conscious. In one especially grisly 
quence, after the ball-busting mother 
(beautiful Nuria Esper) has bathed 
the gore oozing from the body of a 
butchered bull, she triumphantly hacks 
olf the beast’s testicles and thrusts them 
under her skirt. Elsewhere, a gang of 
boys castrates a warloving priest (pre. 
sumably, this sequence was simulated) 
and stuffs his scrotum into his mouth. 
The camera also witnesses some indig- 
nities suffered by the lad's dead father 
while his treacherous, tumting wife 
defecates on his head. Long Live Death 
the literal wanslation of Arrabal's 
which may be intended as an ironi 
comment on fascist tyranny but comes 
through here as the author-director's 
own hopelessly twisted view of all hu- 
man experience. 


Throughout Happy irthday, Wanda 
June, there are intermittent flashes of 
the mordant humor that has made Kurt 
Vonnegut. Jr, a superstar among con- 
temporary novelists. It’s funny, for ex- 
mple, when someone contemplating 
our “whole concept of heroism and its 
sexual roots” points out that J. Edgar 
Hoover lives with his mother. Yet words 
finally seem to imprison rather than 
liberate Vonnegut's own adaptation of his 
stage hit, which director Mark Robson 
approaches with clumsy reverence, as if 
he had packed a camera crew into 
front-row seats. Vonnegut wrote about a 
foot-loose adventurer whose appetite for 
r and glory mi 
parody of the typical Hemingway hero 
—a soldier of fortune, given up for dead 
but suddenly resurrected in a world 
that has traded his primitive machismo 
for long ! nd love beads. The way 
Rod Steiger plays him, sporting safari 
gear suspiciously reminiscent of Hem- 
ingway himself, Wanda June's misspent 
hero delivers every speech as if he ex- 
pected it to be punctuated by wild ар 
plause, Only Susannah York, as the wife 
w stinets are decently à 
shows any real awareness of how a mov- 
ie camera can magnify the flaws of a 
work conceived for the theater. In. the 
wrong medium, what once passed for 
pungent wit and wisdom sounds strained, 
familiar and faintly sophomoric, 


Jose 


ized, 


Michael Caine trades his customary 
conc for а mi 
in Kidnapped, and displays plenty of 
buckle and swash as а Scottish patriot 
during the Jacobite rebellions. Between 
battles, he also acquis himself hand- 
somely with a vital job o£ acting—equal 


led. weapon 


му sword 


to anything he has done since Alfie. 
Keeping pace with him in a lively new 
film ion of Robert Louis Steven 
son's classic tale—which scenarist Jack 
Pulman has breezily combined with epi 
sodes from David Balfour—are Trevor 
Howard. Jack Hawkins, Donald Plea 
sence and young Lawrence Douglas. the 
last playing the’ plucky joins 
the rebels’ efforts to help Bonnie Prince 
Charlie win a throne. Against spectac- 
ular vistas of Scotl 
lands, director Delbert Mann ret 
adve 


I's lochs and high- 


s the 
turous spirit of Stevenson's stories 
yet works in a бр of contemporary 
d the age-old power strug- 
among in Kings. Don't let the 
ing put you off. Kidnapped 
c and entertaining period. di 
produced in a relaxed style that more 
mbit al epics all wo seldo 


Example: Two thoroughbred actresses 
of Vanessa Redgrave and Glenda Jack- 
son's ilk tower above the material hand- 
ed to them in producer Hal Wallis 
plodding Mary, Queen of Scots. This [u- 
miliar chapter in the chronides of royal 
feuding between England's Tudor mon- 
archy and the Stuarts of Scotland. was 
penned by a scenarist (John Hale) with 
a fondness for portentous dialog but 
mo xhoknly concern abour stickir 
facts. 
if director 
able to pour the wine of life 
political intrigues being brewed by 
Trevor Howard (again), Nigel Daven- 
port. Timothy Dalton and a talk: 
dressed-up supporting cast. Brilli 
she is, Glenda's showy stint as 
pasive, supernaturally cunning 
beth projects a bit less conviction 
ın Vanessa's headlong ic in the 
title role. While the glossy studio quality 
of the overall production suggests i 
these stunning crowned heads are 
mopolitan girls at heart, Vanessa 
ages a full-scale porwait of an impulsive, 
romantic, highly sexed royal personage 
whose passion for life and love out- 
ghed her reason in every crisis but the 
last. (See the review of Vivat! Vivat. Re- 
“Theater” section.) 


соу 


w 


gina! in this month’s 

Advocates of women's lib ought to 
find pleasure in Utemare end His Five 
Women, a Japanese film made during 
the American occupation in 1916 and 
only recently released here. A classic 
work by Kenji Mizoguchi. the veteran 
Japanese film maker who died in 1956, 
Utamaro is a real-life Фата about a 
celebrated woodcut of the kue 
I8th. Century, whose idealized portraits 
of women were a revelation in their 
At one stage of his с U 
mno (Minnosike Dando) experiments 
with body painting to bring his art 


closer to life, though his flesh-and-blood 
canvas—a pretty young courtesan—soon 
disappears, moved by grim daily realities 
that the master cannot control. There 
lies the clue to Mizoguchi’s subtle 
theme. Utamaro’s loveliest subject is a 
passionate beauty (Kinuyo Tanaka) who 
murders her unfaithful lover and his 
new mistress, as he is unable то achieve in 
life anything like the perfection of art. 
Please be kind to the wood-block print 
* cries the remorseful pure 
that sounds mocki 


pace and deli "pene 
Utamaro wes lc subjects with 
rare dignity and compassion. A collec 
tor’s ite 


The only flop ever 10 blemish Neil 
Simon's long string of Broadway hits is 
Star Spangled Girl, which has been adapted 
or, more accurately, written off for the 
screen by Arnold Margolin and Jim 
Parker. Director Jerry Paris tries to belt 
out the forced gags іп a апап style 
borrowed from the Three Stooges. though 
he has only two stooges at hand—Broad- 
way recruit Tony Roberts, who docs a 
picty good prep school imitation of 
Walter Mathau, and another actor 
Whose name we would rather forget. 
Shouting every line at the top of their 
lungs. Roberts and his roommate nomi 
nally portray a couple of al slobs 
who meet an all-American girl next door 
and find their underground newspaper 
ged by love, The few bright mo: 
a this drab revel are the work of 


Sandy Duncan of TV's Funny Face, a 
musical-comedy imp whose smile produces 
someth e he effect achieved by 
popping champagne corks. As the Star 
Spangled Gil, Sandy retains her efer- 
vescence, but the party is Hat. 

The unique world of William | 


mer has in the past lost a lot in tr 
tion to the screen. Now comes Tomorrow, 
an independently made feature adapted 
from a Faulkner могу by playwright 
Horton Foote (whose script for To Kill 
a Mockingbird Oscar) and 
directed with u sensitivity by 
Joseph Anthony. In a pu 
style that evokes memories of seve 
classics—a deep bow here to 
s exquisite. black-and-white 
photography—Anthony lovingly treue 
aes a Faulknerian tale that the author 
himself might have honored with 
endorsement. Though marred by a t 
of mclodramatic color, Tomorrow 
Faulkner's depth of character- 
d his concern for those he calls 
nd invincible of the earth.” 
wd endure and endure. 
rader actor of proven 


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40 


Where-To-Duy-l? Use REACTS Card — Page 207 


merit, Robert Duvall scales new heights of 
achievement in his pivotal role as Jack- 
son Fenty, a quiet countryman who 
keeps to himself, seemingly content with 
total isolation, but doggedly demon 
strates his capacity for love when he 
gives shelter 10 a desolate Southern 
woman and her unborn child. The won- 
der of Duvall's performance is that he 
shows almost no surface emotion yet 
somehow projects the loneliness, tor- 
ment and tenderness of а man who 


bends to misfortune the way а tree does. 


As the outcast woman he befriends, 
Olga Bellin expresses me absolute vul- 
nerability of a creature so wounded by 
hardship that she simply gives up. “wore 
out” by a world seldom run according to 
any comprehensible rules of fair pl 


Tomorrow is a hauntingly beautiful sto 


ry, filmed 
pelo, Mississippi. and rooted in human 
th itself. 


Faulkner country near Tu 


tuths as elemental as e 


British director Peter Yates, steadily 
losing speed since Bullitt, tries to get 
funny about crime in The Hot Rock, an 
amoral comedy about four inept crooks 
employed by black UN delegate 
(Moses Gunn) to steal a rare diamond 
fiom the Brooklyn Muscum and restore 
it to its Afvican nation of origin. Once 
stolen, the gem is swallowed by one 
captured crook (Paul Sand) and goes 
with him to jail. Which means the test 
of the gang has to plot a jail break, alter 
which they have to stage a daring heli- 
copter raid on a police precinct station 
where the diamond has been stashed, De 
spite a scenario by William Goldman 
(whose credits include Harper. as well 
as Butch Cassidy and the Sundance 
Kid), Hol Rock is never suspenseful 
and rarely comical. Goldman's idea 
adapted from the novel by Donald E 
Westlake. supposes that if one big 
caper makes a comedy, four such esca- 
pades must trig; Ыг. But why 
should we automatically root for crooks 
—unles they charm us as believable 
bumptious human characters, with thei 
backs to the wall and their heads in the 
clouds? Zero Mosel as Sand’s  shyster 
father and Broadway's Ron Leibman as 
the gang's mechanical whiz kid work a 
little too hard ас bein: 
The film's real handic 
out t0 be the star power generated by 
Robert Redford and George Segal, respec 
tively playing the mastermind of the caper 
and his aggressive sidekick. Born win- 
ners, pretend 
pair of petty thieves working their tails 
off on а bad job for a mere 25 grand 
apiece, they look like cats who might 
casily become male models and pull 
down twice that sum cvery ycar. 


messy 


lovable clowns, 


p. though. t 


g 10 be schlemicls. As a 


All the regular cowhands ride off to 
look for gold, so John Wayne, as a 
6Ü-ycarold cattle rancher, has to drive 


44 famous mixed drinks 


E x M IIT. 


р" i 
| 2 
| E 
3 L 


Jf you were Your Birth Sign 
born between: and Symbol are: 


MachzA | S euo 


TAURUS 
April 20-May 20 The Bul 8 


GEMINI п 


The Twins MERCURY $ 


June 22-uly 22 
July 23-Aug. 22 


Wingo MERCURY ў 


Aug. 23-Sept. 22 | The Virgin 


UBRA 
The Scales A= 
SCORPIO 
The Scorpion PU 
OTIS gg | JUPITER 4 


CAPRICORN 
The Goat SATURN р 
AQUARIUS seg 

The Water Bearer 

PISCES 
The Fishes 36 


Sept. 23-Oct. 22 VENUS Q 


Oct. 23-Nov. 22 MARS d 


Nov. 23—Dec. 21 


Dec. 22—Jan. 19 


Jan.20-Feb. 18 URANUS MI 


Feb. 19-March 20 NEPTUNE X 


Some basics for talking about what's written in the stars 


The basic concepts of astrology date back over 5,000 
years. Astrologists say tbat the position of the sun, moon 
and planets at the time of your birth affects your entire 
life. Thus people born at different times of the year tend 
to have different potential characteristics. 

Every person is said to be born under a "sign of the 
Zodiac." The Zodiac is a kind of cosmic calendar — a 
giant imaginary circle encompassing what seerns to be 
the sun's yearly path around the earth. Its 12 parts are 
named for ancient star constellations ; each has a char- 
acteristic symbol or “sign.” The part in which the sun is 
located at the time of year you were born denotes your 


sign. Basic character is often "read" by this sun sign 
alone. The moon and planets, especially your “ruling” 
planet, also add their influence. Here the hour you were 
born is important ; since solar bodies move at different 
speeds, their related positions constantly change. An 
astrologist uses these positions, plotted on charts called 
“horoscopes,” as the key to your character and abilities 
- - - thus formulating a guide to your path for the future. 

Astrology has also given rise to intriguing associations 
such as birth gems, lucky days, colors, numbers, etc. 
It has many contradictory interpretations; we offer a 
mere capsule of those most widely accepted. 


Intent of astrology data herein is simply 
to inform, not to advise. Therefore any personal 
application is the individual's responsibility. 


HOW TO HAVE f 
HAPPY HOUR PARTY 


When Happy Hour talk turns to Astrology, this 
guide's brief summary will spark your conversa- 
tion . . . and help you know what enthusiasts 
are talking about. In fact, it will help you have 
the greatest Happy Hour party ever. 

At a Happy Hour party you can host a 
houseful of guests—with minimum time, work, 
and money. This guide even offers invitations, 
napkins, and a flag. Most important, it shows 
how to mix superb drinks made with all the 
basic liquors: Bourbon, Scotch, gin, vodka, 
rum, Southern Comfort—plus mixing tips. 


How to improve drinks: secret of the "pros" 
The experts' greatest tip is this: You 
can improve many mixed drinks simply 


What is Southern Comfort ? 

Although it's used like an ordinary whiskey, 
Southern Comfort tastes much diflerent than 
any other basic liquor. It actually tastes 
good, right out of the bottle! And there's a 
reason. In the days of old New Orleans, one 
talented gentleman was disturbed by the taste 
of even the finest whiskeys of his day. So he 
combined rare and delicious ingredients to 


THAT'S OUT OFTHIS WORLD! 


by “switching” the basic liquor called for 
in the recipe—to one with a more satis- 
fying taste. A perfect example is the use 
of Southern Comfort instead of an ordi- 
nary liquor as a smoother, tastier base for 
your Manhattans, Sours, Old-Fashioneds, 
Collinses, etc. The difference, of course, is 
in the unique taste of Southern Comfort 
itself. It adds a deliciousness no other basic 
liquor can. Mix one of these drinks in the 
usual way; then mix the same drink with 
Southern Comfort. (Both recipes are in the 
guide.) Compare them. The improvement 
is truly remarkable! But, to understand 
just why this is true . . . make the simple 
taste test on the following page. 


create this unusually smooth, special kind of 
basic liquor, That’s how Southern Comfort 
was born. Its formula is still а family secret 
-~ - - its delicious taste still unmatched 

by any other liquor! First try 

it on-the-rocks . . . then you'll 

understand why it improves. 

most mixed drinks, too! 


check your 


The sun, moon, and planets cach have special spheres of 
influence. Depending on their relative location in the 
sky, they affect all people in varying degrees . . . but espe- 
cially those in the Zodiac signs they dominate or “rule.” 
Sun: life's central power! Rules individuality, purpose. 
Moon: affects emotions, home, and a changeable nature. 
Mars: relates to energy, aggression, and initiative. 
Mercury : influences intelligence, communications, travel. 
Venus : pertains to love, beauty, and the fine arts. 
Jupiter: reigns over joviality, wealth and reason. 
Saturn: regulates time, cautiousness, and discipline. 
Uranus: rules sudden change, inventiveness, originality. 
Neptune: governs intuition, ideals and mysticism. 
Pluto: newly found planet, said to be ruler of Scorpio by 
some astrologers ; relates to trends, government, rebirth. 


Ancient astrologers divided all people into four basic 
types, each symbolized by one of these elements. Thus 
a person born under a certain Zodiac sign was said to 
have the characteristics of his clement. Find yours. 
FIRE SIGNS: EARTH SIGNS: 

Aries • Leo • Sagittarius Taurus œ Virgo • Capricom 
Sign of leaders! Energetic, Practical, careful people 
enthusiastic people, who follow through! 
AIR SIGNS: WATER SIGNS: 

Gemini • Libra « Aquarius Cancer • Scorpio » Pisces 
The communicators! In- Emotional, sensitive . . . a 
tellectual and perceptive. highly intuitive group. 


make this simple 
taste test 

and you'll learn 
how to improve 
most drinks: 


The flavor of any mixed drink is controlled by the 
taste of the liquor you use as a base. To realize 
the importance of this, pour a jigger of Bourbon 
or Scotch over cracked ice in a short glass. Sip it. 
Now do the same with Southern Comfort. Sip it, 
and you've found a completely different basic 
liquor—one that tastes good with nothing added! 
That’s why switching to Southern Comfort as a 
base makes most mixed drinks taste much better, 
Try it in your favorite drink. Like Manhattans? 
Make both recipes shown at right. Compare them. 
One sip will convince you! 


ordinary MANHATTAN 


1 jigger (1% oz.) Bourbon or rye 

у oz. sweet vermouth 

Dash of Angostura bitters (optional) 

Stir with cracked ice; strain into glass. 
Add a cherry. Now learn the experts’ 
secret... use the recipe at right. You'll 
see how а simple switch in besic liquor 
Improves this famous drink tremendously. 


improvad MANHATTAN 

1 jigger (1% oz.) Southern Comfort e 
Y oz. dry vermouth сат 
Dash of Angostura bitters (optional) E. 
Mix it like the ordinary recipe. Then sip it. The 

improvement is remarkable. The delicious flavor 

of Southern Comfort makes it taste much better. 

Comfort* Manhattan, stellar drink at the 


Mayflower's Town & Country Room, Washington, D.C. 
“southern Comton? 


| 


that you were born to wear! 


ARIES: gem is the brilliant diamond; 
color is bright, fiery red. 

TAURUS : gemis the emerald. Colors 
are Spring's green and yellow. 


GEMINI: gem is the lustrous pearl; 
colors are clear blue and gray. 


CANCER: gems are ruby and moon- 
stone; colors are silver and white. 


LEO: gems are sardonyx and ruby. 
Colors are sunny orange and gold. 


VIRGO: gem is the heavenly sap- 
phire. Color is sapphire blue. 
LIBRA: gem is the flashing opal: 
colors are airy blue and gold. 


SCORPIO: gem is the golden topaz. 
Color is deep, glowing гей. 
SAGITTARIUS : gemis the intriguing 
turquoise. Color is royal purple. 


CAPRICORN: gem is the garnet. 
Colors are black and rich brown. 


AQUARIUS: gem is the alluring 
amethyst. Color is electric blue. 


PISCES: gem is the aquamarine. 
Colors are sea green and lavender. 


ordinary TOM COLLINS 


% jigger fresh lemon juice 
1 jigger (1% 02.) gin 
1 tspn. sugar + sparkling water 


Use tall glass. Dissolve sugar 

in juice: add ice cubes and gin. 
Fill with sparkling water. Stir. 
John Collins: Use Bourbon or rye instead of gin. 


smoother COMFORT* COLLINS 


1 jigger (1% oz.) Southern Comfort 
Juice of % lime + 7UP 


Mix Southern Comfort and lime juice in tall 
glass. Add ice cubes: fill with 7UP. The best 
tasting — and easiest to mix — Collins of ай! 
Lionized by Leos and sun-lovers 


at Hotel Fontaineblaau, Miami Baach *Southern Comfort® 


MINT JULEP 
4 sprigs fresh mint - 1 tspn. sugar 
Dash of water - 2 oz. Bourbon 


Put water in tall glass; crush mint 
and sugar in water. Pack cracked 
ice to top of glass. Pour in whiskey 
and stir until the glass frosts. 

For a julep worth a mint in flavor, та it with 
Southern Comfort instead of Bourbon, no sugar. 


LEMON COOLER 


Lucky for Libras and friends 

at El Mirador Hotel, Palm Springs 

1 jigger (1% oz.) Southern Comfort 
‘Schweppes Bitter Lemon 

Pour S.C. over ice cubes in tall glass. 
Fill with Bitter Lemon: stir. 


RUM SWIZZLE 
Juice % lime - 1 tspn. sugar 
2% oz. light rum - 2 dashes bitters 


Stir vigorously in glass pitcher with 
lots of crushed ісе, till mixture foarms. 
Serve in double Old-Fashioned glass. 


‘Super swuzie: Use Southern Comfort, 3 tspn. sugar. 


COMFORT* ON-THE-ROCKS 
for the sign and age of Aquarius, 
as mixed at Anthony's Pier 4, Boston 


1 jigger (1% oz.) 

Southern Comfort 

Pour over cracked ice in short glass: add 
a twist of lernon peel. Southern Comfort 
has such a delicious natural flavor it's one 
Of the most popular on-the-rocks drinks. 


Hint... ice is important! 

For best results, buy packaged ice. Professionally made ite is 
free of air bubbles, chemicals, impurities. h's tasteless, cyst 
cleat, slower melung: makes drinks taste-end lcok-bette. 


GIN 'N TONIC 

Juice and rind % lime 

1 jigger (1% oz.) gin 

Schweppes Quinine Water (tonic) 
Squeeze lime over ice cubes in tall 
glass and add rind. Pour in gin; 
fill with tonic and stir. 

Swichto a smoother, berter-tasting drink. Skip the 
gin and enjoy Southern Comforts talent for tonic. 


GIN RICKEY 

Juice and гіпа % lime 

1 jigger gin • sparkling water 
Squeeze lime over ice cubes 

in 8-07. glass. Add rind and gin. 
Fill with sparkling water and stir. 
To “tev up your rickey, use SC. instead of gin. 


RUM “М COLA 

Juice and rind % lime 

1 jigger (1% oz.) light rum - cola 
Squeeze lime over ice cubes in tall 


glass. Add rind and pour in rum. 
Fill with cola and stir. 


Instead of rum, see what a comfort S.C.ts to cola. 


COMFORT", BABY! 

1 jigger (1% oz.) Southern Comfort 
2 jiggers cold milk + 1 tspn. sugar 
Dissolve sugar in milk in 8-ог. 
glass. Add Southern Comfort. ice 
cubes: stir. (Optional: Dust 

lightly with nutmeg.) 


HONOLULU COOLER 
Poured for Pisceans & partners at 
Sheraton's Royal Hawaiian Hotel 

1 jigger (1% oz.) Southern Comfort 
Juice of % lime 

Hawaiian pineapple juice 


Pack tall glass with crushed ice: add lime 
juice. S.C. Fill with pineapple juice: stir. 


VONT duck NUITIDET, 
ИП Day 9f 113 WEEK 


ARIES: your lucky numbers are 7 and 8 . . . lucky day is Tuesday. 
TAURUS: your lucky numbers are 1 and 3 . . . lucky day is Friday. 
GEMINI: your lucky numbers are 3 and 6. . . lucky day is Wednesday. 
CANCER: your lucky numbers are 8 and 3 . . . lucky day is Monday. 
LEO: your lucky numbers are 5 and 1 . . . lucky day is Sunday. 
VIRGO: your lucky numbers are 8 and 5 . . . lucky day is Wednesday. 
LIBRA: your lucky numbers are 6 and 4 . . . lucky day is Friday. 
SCORPIO: your lucky numbers are 5 and 4 . . . lucky day is Tuesday. 
SAGITTARIUS: your lucky number is 9 . . . lucky day is Thursday. 
CAPRICORN: lucky numbers аге 7 and 8... lucky day is Saturday. 
AQUARIUS: lucky numbers are 8 and I . . . lucky day is Saturday. 
PISCES: your lucky numbers are 8 and 2 . . . lucky day is Friday. 


HOT BUTTERED COMFORT* 
Lucky omen at the Red Lion, Уай, Colo. 
Small stick cinnamon • slice lemon peel 
1 jigger Southern Comfort • pat butter 
Put cinnamon. lemon peel, Southern 
Comfort in mug: fill with boiling 

water. Float butter: stir. (Leave spoon 
in glass when pouring hot water.) 


COMFORT* OLD-FASHIONED 
in the orbit of the Gaslight Club, Chicago. 
Washington, D.C.. Beverfy Hills, Paris 
Dash of Angostura bitters 

% tspn. sugar (optional) 

% oz. sparkling water 

1 jigger (1% oz.) Southern Comfort 

Stir bitters, sugar. and water in glass; add ice 
cubes, Southern Comfort. Add twist of lemon 
peel, orange slice, and cherry. It's superb! 
Ordinary Old-Fashioned: 1 tspn. suger, Bourbon or rye instead ol S.C. 


Heavenly drinks for a Happy Hour under any Zodiac sign! 


ROB ROY DRY MARTINI 


On target for Sagittarians! Terrific for Taureanst 
1 jigger (1% oz.) Scotch 4 parts gin or vodka 
У jigger (% oz.) sweet vermouth 1 part dry vermouth na 
Dash Angostura bitters Stir with cracked ice and strain into | 
E Stir with cracked ice and strain chilled cocktail glass. Serve with à | 
مج‎ into cocktail glass. Add a twist green olive or twist of lernon peel. 
of lernon peel. (This drink is often For a Gibson, use 5 i part an —= 
called a "Scotch Manhattan. ") serve with a pend еы Mr pecu 
ee 2 MARGARITA SCARLETT O'HARA 
Mixed for Cancer's moon-childrent A dnnk as intriguing as its namesake. 
1 jigger (1% oz.) tequila 1 jigger (1% oz.) Southern Comfort 
% oz. Triple Sec Juice of % fresh lime | 
1 oz. fresh lime or lemon juice 1 jigger Ocean Spray 
Moisten cocktail glass rim with cranberry Juice cocktail p: 
fruit rind: spin nm in salt. Shake Shake with cracked ice: strain into = 
ingredients with cracked ice: strain glass. It's as enticing as the French 
into glass. Sip over salted nm. Quarter, and stars in any crowd. 


COLD TODDY GIMLET 


Valued by Virgos! A perfect gem for Gemini! 
У tspn. sugar • 1 oz. water 4 parts gin or vodka 
2 oz Scotch or Bourbon 1 part Rose's sweetened lime juice 
Stir sugar with water in short glass. Shake with cracked ice and strain 
Add ice cubes. liquor, twist lemon peel. into a cocktail glass. (This drink is 
A toddy pleases anybody, mixed with Southern Comfort. a distant cousin to the Martini.) 
aem DAIQUIRI COMFORT" 'N BOURBON 
t J Tropical cheer for Capricorn! Shines with the stars at Ambassador — 
p Juice Y lime or % lemon Hotel's Now Grove. in Los Angeles JJ 
| 1 teaspoon sugar % jigger (% oz ) Southern Comfort 
| 1 jigger (1% oz.) light rum % jigger Bourbon - % jigger water 
- Shake with cracked ice until shaker Pour liquors over cracked ice in 
Tem ^ frosts. Strain into cocktail glass. short glass; add water. Stir. Serve 
То give your Daiquiri a new accent, use Southern with a twist of lemon peel. Enjoy a 
Comfort instead of rum. only % tspn. sugar. deliciously smooth combination. 


"Souther Comfort® 


cosmos in 

C) ЛЛ) уоиг һапа 

fingers) show dominant character traits. Long lines аге most favorable. 

Each mount is named fora planet and is linked to the planet's influence. 
Left hand shows traits at birth; right hand, those you have today. 

Head Line © Heart Line © Life Line © Fate Line Marriage Lines 

D Moen, ў Mercury, © Sun, р Satum, ¥ Jupiter, Ф Venus, С Mers 


SCREWDRIVER 
l, 1 jigger (1% oz.) vodka + orange juice 
Put ice cubes into a 6-oz. glass. Add 

vodka: fill with orange juice and stir. 

A new twist Use Southern Comlort instead of vodka. 


BLOODY MARY 

Red and right for Aries! 

2 jiggers tomato juice - 1 jigger vodka 
¥ jigger fresh lemon juice А 
Dash of Worcestershire sauce 1 x 


Salt. pepper to taste. Shake with 
cracked ice; strain into 6-oz. glass. б. 


WHISKEY SOUR 


1 jigger (1% oz.) Bourbon or rye 
i | % jigger fresh lemon juice ~ 1 tspn. sugar 
UU $лаке with cracked ice: strain into glass. 
Add orange slice on rim of glass, and cherry. 

Now use recipe below. See how a switch 
in basic liquor greatly improves this drink. 


Improved sour, choice of star-gazers 
at Hotel Mark Hopkins, San Francisco 
COMFORT* SOUR 
1 jigger (1% oz.) Southern Comfort 
% jigger fresh lemon juice • % tspn. sugar 

Mix it like the usual recipe. But you'll enjoy it far Y 
more. The use of Southern Comfort gives your 
drink a superb flavor no other sour can match. 
“Southern Comfort® 


NE COMFORT* EGGNOG 
1 quart dairy eggnog 
1 cup (8 oz.) Southern Comfort 
Chill ingredients. Blend in punch 
bowl by beating; dust with nutmeg. 

Serves 10. .. and pleases them all. OPEN HOUSE PUNCH 

Single serving: Add 4 parts eggnog to 1 part One fifth Southern Comfort 
SC. in shor glass. Sir: dust with nutmeg. 3 quarts 7UP - 6 oz. fresh lemon juice 
One 6-oz. can frozen orange juice 
P эр STINGER One 6-oz. can frozen lemonade 
E Chill ingredients. Mix in punch bowl, 


A salute to Scorpio! 4 
1 jigger (1% oz) brandy  — 900070 TUP last. Add drops of red food 
% jigger coloring as desired (optional); stir. 


тепе de mente Float block of ice or add ice cubes; add 
Sh h ied Д orange and lemon slices. Serves 32. 
eene еи кыли Maka it faster and easier with Bar-Tender Brand Instant 
А Southern Comfort instead of brandy Open House Punch Mix. Get й at vour Favorite stre... 
nimis age Veale a tage. just add Souther Confort, JUP, and water. Makes 32 drinks. 


Fo ALEXANDER GRASSHOPPER 
1 part fresh cream Ж oz. fresh cream چو‎ 
1 part creme de cacao 1 oz. white creme de cacao р 
1 part Southern Comfort. 1 oz green creme de menthe 
or gin or brandy Shake with cracked ice or mix 
qu Shake with cracked ice; strain. in electric blender. strain. 


Send-for-this 


Happy Hour Party Kit 


You furnish the liquor and friends; 
we furnish everything else . . . 


“Happy Hour” Flag, Invitations, Napkins! $150 
Large. festive flag. 12" x 18" size, blue and red on white only 

cloth (pole and cord not included). PLUS 24 invitations Price includes 
with envelopes. 80 quality cocktail napkins: flag decor. shipping charges. 


Print name and address. Send check or money order tc. 
Dept. 2SH, Cockteil Hour Enterprises, Р.О. Box 12428, St. Louis, Mo. 63132 
Offer void ın Canada, Georgia, New Hampshire. Tennessee and other states where prohibited. 


Special Offer! 


Save on this NEW line of Southern Comfort 


Steamboat 
Glasses 


New straight-side shape with broad. 
gold lip. just like the latest expensive 
glasses. Handsome blue and gold decor. 


A. HIGHBALL GLASS 

Generous size for serving highballs 

and other tall favorites. 5 
Set of 8 glasses (12-0z size) 

B. DDUBLE DLD-FASHIONED 
All-purpose glass for highballs. 
on-the-rocks, even coolers $395 
Set of 8 glasses (137-02. size) 

C. ON-THE-RDCKS GLASS 

On-the-rocks, mists. "short" highballs 
Set of 8 glasses (8-02. size) 
PLUS matching Master $335 
Measure glass "E" (9 glasses) 

D. DN-THE-RDCKS STEM GLASS 
Popular new shape for on-the-rocks 
and “shon” drinks $50 
Set of 8 glasses (7% oz. size) 

E. MASTER MEASURE GLASS 
Versatile single glass enables you to 
pour all the correct measures. 

Marked for 2 oz.: 1% oz. (pager) 

1 oz. X oz. (У jigger): V oz 
sold alone 75€ 
F. “STEAMBOAT” NAPKINS 
Color-mated to glasses, napkins say 
"Smooth Sailing $100 
Five packages of 40 each 
G. TALL CDDLER GLASS 

New tall, slender shape for serving 
Collinses and coolers 335 
Set of 8 glasses (127-02. size) 
Print your name and address. Order items 
desired by letter and send check or money order to 
E 

Prices include shipping costs. Offer void in 
Canada, Georgia. New Hampshire. Tennessee. 
and other states where prohibited. 

SOUTHERN COMFORT CORPORATION 

100 PROOF LIQUEUR, 57. LOUIS. MO. 63132 
©1971 SOUTHERN COMFORT CORPORATION 


ny kind 
of help he can get. This turns out to 
be a philosophical black man and 
hoolboys, the eldest a stripling of 
ed with ease by young Robert 
Carradine, son of John). Thus, The Cow- 
boys displays a new wrinkle in Wayne 
Westerns, along with some new wrinkles 
in the old Iron Duke himself. The child 


actors, mostly nonprofessionals, look just 
ordinary enough lo be utterly convinc 
ing: and thows the characterizations 


are shallow, producer-director Mark. Ry- 
dell avoids the temp п 10 ler anyone 
become cute. They are merely boys. out 
there in the wilde with Wayne, 
Roscoe Lee Browne 1 bur ef 
fective as the 


The Cowboys is so well done and takes 
only a sniggering sidelong glance at sex 
lleen Dewhurst appears along the 
1 with a wagonload of painted li 
s but pauses scarcely long cnough 16 
I on her garters), 
a it a clean, wholesome GP-r 
picture. Tha t is debatable, when 
you consider that keeping company with 
John Wayne swiltly tums boys into men 
who drink, swear and slay their enemies 
without mercy. Speech th 


ily viewers may 


5 


de sequence in which W. 
Jad's stutter by browbeating him to say 
“You dirty, mean son of a bitch.” 
Music from Stanley Kubr ick's 2001: A 
Space Odyssey covers the opening sequence 
of Dynamite Chicken, in which an absurd 
ly sloppy fat m from a flop 
house and waddles down to the comer 
to make obscene phone calls. The rest of 


Chicken, loosely assembled and catego- 
vized as "an electronic magazine" by ilm 
maker Ernie Ріо, features Joan Baez, 


Paul Krassner, Peter Max, Andy W: 

hol, members of The Ace Trucking 
Company, the Black Pant ty and 
the Manachine Society. For good me 
ure. Soe editors Al Goldstein and Jim 
Buckley swap insults oncamera back to 


also a display of nudity, and shots of 
i are juxtaposed with shots 
sandwich shops, wh 
ment. I 
n proves 


supposed to be social c 
proves anything, Chich 
that collecting a batch of recogni 
names and faces and four-letter words 
does not add up to satire and that shock- 
g people is much, mudi harder than 
it used to be. 


"Writerdirector André Cayatte’s To 
Die of Love is based on ГаДайс Ga- 
briclle Russier—ihe true, tragic story of 

old teacher in Marseilles, а 


Introducing the 


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Te ! 4 с 
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Сепегайоп дар? 


JIMBEAM 39 


never heard of it. : 


Burt Bacharach. Writer of 
songs people go around hum 
ming. 

Bert Bacharach. Writer of 
columns people go around quot- 
ing. 

А son and his father, Differ- 
ent generations, But with some- 
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the love of their craft. 

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Bacharachs. 

And that's the way it is with 
the Beams, too. 

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formula that's stayed honest 

and unchanged for 177 years. 

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girlish divorcee who was hounded, im- 
prisoned and finally driven to suicide as 
a result of her romance with a 16-year- 
old schoolboy. Though remarkably ma- 
ture for his years, Gabrielle's young lover 
thought by his enraged parents to 
be either mentally ill or bewitched 
Only alter the death of Gabrielle did 
the publics morbid curiosity give way to 
recognition ihat family pride and 
French justice had collaborated to de- 
stroy а woman for an indiscretion that is 
met with a Gallic shrug when the roles 
are reversed and a nubile girl is seduced 
by a middleaged male. Cayatte may 
claim the dubious credit of having made 


w 


an intelligent exploitation movie from 
material that just misses the bathos 
of true-confession pulp stories, Annie 
Girardor's poignant performance as С 


99. 


brielle is well matched by that of 
year-old movie newcomer Bruno Pra 
am overnight star who evokes memories 
of the Lue Gerard Philipe. 


Like her New Yorker colleague Penel- 
ope Gilliatt, who wrote Sunday Bloody 
Sunday, Irish novelist. Edna O'Brien 
composes a love triangle with an A. C./ 
D.C. slant in X Y and Zee. Michacl 
Caine as a habitual philanderer and 
winsome Susannah York as his mistress 
play X and Y to Elizabeth Taylor's 
shock-troop tactics as a tempestuous 
married woman named Zee, who. when 
all else fails, spoils her husband's game 
by seducing his loved one herself. Hav- 
ing established the Other Woman's Les 
bi 


to cveryonc's satisfaction 
triumphant, a born survivor r 
take back her weak-willed mate 
sume the nonstop mutual destruction 
that keeps their marri E 
lines of these posh Lon 
the yesteryear of women's romantic fic- 
tion: 


wish we had met in a different 
place... 
wy. or on a rainy afternoon in а te: 
room." But the surest antidote to that 
tearoom talk turns out 10 be Mrs. Burton, 
doing her Virginia Woolf queen-bitch 
bit to a fare-thee-well, with corrosive 
humor and unfailing showmanship. This 
тау not be good acting in the strict sense, 
bur it certainly recks of stardom, and Liz 
Y and Zee from A to Z. 


on a quiet road in the coi 


dominates 


Harold and Maude, bearing out its ad- 
vance ballyhoo, co-stars Bud Cort (who 
ed Brewster McCloud) and Broad. 
way veteran Ruth Gordon in a truly 
May-December love story about а 20ish 
lad’s passion for a woman of 80. The 
movie is a tol cop-out, but it offers 
a couple of droll moments as it estab: 
lishes Harold as a n 
poor little rich boy who keeps faking 
gory suicides to unnerve his mother 
(deftly played by Britain's Vivian Pick- 
le). Harold's nuttiness, of course, ex- 
plains his fixation about Maud 


terribly 


eca 


Auntie Mame-ish old widow who abso- 
oozes saccharine speeches 
living life to the fullest every day, е 
moment. She also steals cars. and drives 
without a license, which presumably cer- 
tifies her as one of the young at heart. 
To ensure that she wins audience sym 
pathy belore tumbling into bed with 
Harold (the coupling is represented 
symbolically by a fireworks display. 
creaky device rescued from forced те! 
ment for this special occasion). M: 
les us see that she has а Nazi serial 
number tattooed on her arm. Alter ball- 
ng the boy, on the eve of her 80th 
hday, Maude kills herself, presum 
because writer Colin Higgins and 
ector Hal Ashby feel that anything she 
ht do after that would be, in every 
sense, anticlimactic. It’s not the life but 
the death in the old girl Harold loves, 
after all, which may tell us why һе drives 
а custom-built Jaguar mi 
and Maude is а miscalculated insult to 
old and young, male and female, rich and 
poor, none of whom is likely to identify 
with such cynically contrived pap. 
Though he stood at the top of his pro- 
fession a few short years ago, director Elia 
Kazan appears to be supporting the trend 
toward film making as а famil 
Last year’s Wanda was an earn 
tcurish effort by Mrs. Kazan, otherwise 
known as Barbara Loden, This year, Ka- 
zan himself directs The Visitors from a 
screenplay by his son Chris, who also co- 
produced. Shot on location at Kazan 
Senior's country home in Connecticut, the 
film has much in common with Staw 
Dogs, а more brilliant movie about an- 
other peace-loving young man and his 
woman vs. a couple of bristling rapists. As 
the s tell it, the hero (James Woods) 
is a Vietnam veteran living out of wedlock 
with a gil ( 4 
the girl's crusty futher (Patrick McVey), 
an ornery old bastard who writes Western 
thrillers and evidently dreams of a world 
ruled by Green Berets. Into this imperfect 
dise come two of the boys former 
vice buddies (Steve Railsback and 
Chico Martinez), fresh out of Le 
worth, where they've donc time for x 
ing and murdering a teenaged Vietnamese 
girl and itching to scores 
with the bastard whose testimony con 
victed them. They are strangely cool and 
effectively: menacing—particularly Rails 
back. Kazan knows the mechanics of 
melodrama, all right, yet tends to over. 
the seamier side of his son's 


bout 


carse, Harold. 


y hobby 
tly ama 


atricia Joyce), a baby 


now settle 


io. A viewer grasps th dat 
he Visitors is intended ıo be serious 
statement about war as a brutalizing ex 


perience for otherwise fine American boys. 
А rather stale message. And director. Kit 
s handling of it suggests an aesthetic 
generation gap—even the music sounds 
wrong, with a stereo in the background 
whining out jukebox airs reminiscent of 


43 


PLAYBOY 


44 


A SMALL CAMERA 
SHOULDN'T BE ATOY. 


(BUT IT SHOULD BE AS MUCH FUN!) 


Asmall camera is a 
"must" for people on 
the move. But most , 
аге “stripped- ® 
down" versions, ^ 


selects proper exposures 
for you, without the “‘set- 
tings-and-adjustments 
numbers game” others 
can get you into. 


that take fuzzy pic- You just press the 
tures you shamefully button for perfect, 
hide in a deep drawer. Clear slides or prints 


And many use film cart- 
ridges that themselves are so 
bulky, your pocket can’t carry 
enough for a day’s supply of pictures. 


everytime, through 

its sharp Hexanon lens. 
^ Even flash is auto- 
ad A matic, especially with 
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Ы Berkey 


The SX-727 is one of Pioneer's new 
lineup of four AM/FM stereo receivers 
with an extra margin of value. If you're 
looking for greater power, performance, 
precision, features and versatility, you'll 
find the 195 watt SX-727 offers more 
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Sensibly priced at $349.95, including 
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then some. 

U. S. Pioneer Electronics Corp. 
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New Jersey 07072 


Q PIONEER’ 


when you waht something better 


West: 13300 S. Estrella Avo., Los Angeles, Calif, 90248 * Canada: S. H. Parker Co., Ontario. 


Where-To-Buy-It? Uso REACTS Card — Page 207 


the mid-Filties, The next-worst aspect of 
the film, as a work by a major American 
director, is the poor voice recording and 
cinematogiaphy. The Visitors appears to 
have been filmed by choice in brooding 
semidarkness, as if characters whose mo- 
tives are murky must live with the lights 
out, secking perpetual shadow. Where 
have you been, Gadge? That's the way 
they used to do things in vampire movies 


The hero of Gumshoe, a bravura role 
for Albert Finney, is a bingo caller from 
троо—а nobody named Eddie 
who dreams of becoming a private 
the Bogart mold, or maybe a Las 
comic. Under the influence of Bogi 
the collected works of Raymond СЇ 
| Dashiell Hammett, Eddie stumbles 
ко a real-life suspense drama involving 
a murder plot and а gang of arms smug- 
glers up to some monkey business in 


South Africa. But plots and subplots 
er little to Gumshoe, which t 
ten by Neville Smith mostly as a series ol 
al and musical. gags. 


Melodramatic theme music swells on the 
sound track while Finney slips in and out 
of a trench coat, snarling “Here's lookin’ 
at you, kid" or any of a dozen bits of 
dialog cribbed from the repertoire of Во 
gart in his prime. Trouble is, the movi 
half invites comparison with Woody Al- 
len's Play It A yet lacks the 
presence of a schnook-hero like Woody 
himself. The fine cast, featuring Billie 
Whitelaw, Frank Finlay and Janice Rul 
often seems confused as to whether it's 
supposed to play Gumshoe as a straight 
thriller or an outright spoof. The confu- 
sion stems, we suspect, from the freewhecl- 
ing scenario—which travels backward in 
time at such a clip that it occasionally 
leaps right off the track 


gain, Sam. 


MUSEUMS 


Ever since several million preanflation 
dollars were shelled out to restore San 
Francisco's crumbling Palace of 
Ans in 1966, harder civic heads 
been wondering aloud. just what in hell 
Happily. 
Turn it into the Explorate- 
science museum as unique in its 
dimensions as the palace itself 
and absorbing midway of self-discovery 
in science, technology and human per- 
ception that dwarfs any other show in 
town, An [8th Century classical relic of 
the 1915 Panama-Pacific International 
Exposition, the palace is an 
threeacre vault of moldy gingerbread diat 
strikes the r for some 
Big bird 
has flown the coop, but in its nest, like 
the warehouse of Citizen Kane's Xanadu, 
iore than 200 treasures to delight the 
t and stimulate the mind of anybody, 
у age, who ever dug rummaging in 


to do with ii 
their 


they now have 


wer. 


а vast 


awesome 


sye аз а huge han. 


futuristic sweptwing colossus. 


MAIL COUPON TODAY FOR BEST SELECTION Ey | 


FREE! ree 


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EA Tet 


Osma cop. 


[3E E^ 


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PLAYBOY 


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У "BLESSED ARE 


WITH NO OBLIGATION 


035 JOAN BAEZ 
513 LED ZEPPELIN Blessed Are... 


Atlan LP, BTR, CASS E {2 record set) | 127 CHER 
Vangu LP, ВТВ, CASS Kapp LP, BTR, CASS 


063 ISAAC HAYES/ 


m] 5 
427 DON MC LEAN a e ERY 823 THE WHO Meaty, SHAFT Original Sound- 


American Pie 


Cherish Beaty, Big & Bouncy track (2 record set) 


omar LE SIR Bell LP, BTR, CASS Decca LP, BTR, CASS Enter LP, BTR, CASS 


BIS LORETTA LYNN 277 B. J. THOMAS 514 ROBERTA FLACK 910 THE BOY FRIEND 313 JOAN BAEZ/ 780 MOUNTAIN 027 THE DIONNE WAR 
You're Lookin’ Greatest Hits Vol. 2 Quiet Fire Original Soundtrack CARRY IT ON Flowers Of Evil WICKE STORY 

At Country Scept LP, BTR, CASS Atlan LP, BTR, CASS MGM LP, BTR, CASS Original Soundtrack Windi LP (2 record set) 

Decca LP, ВТВ, CASS Vangu LP, ВТЕ, CASS Scept LP, ВТВ, CASS 


760. PARTRIDGE FAMILY 700, TCHAIKOVSKY 


275 CANNED HEAT 354 THE 101 STRINGS 


267 DIONNE WAR- 


тоо TENA KON Live at Topanga Webb & Dacharach's 903 THE DONNY WICKE I'll Never. 909 LOU RAWLS 
Up To Date 1812 буте cass ЁН Million Seller Hits DSMOND ALBUN Fall In Love Again Natural Man 
Bell LP, 8TR, CASS £ y Wand LP, ВТВ, CASS Alshi LP. MGM LP, BTR, CASS. Scept LP, BTR, CASS. MGM LP, BTR, CASS 
тов HANDEL 270 DIONNE WARWICKE 470 IKE & TINA 380 ABBIEHOFFMAN 308 JOAN BAEZ 100 THREE DOG NIGHT 777 GODSPELL 
Water Music Greatest Movie Hits TURNER ‘Nuff Said Wake Up. America! Joan Baez 5 Golden Bisquits Original Cast 
Yorks LP, BTR, CASS — Scept LP, BIR, CASS UniAr LP, ВТВ, CASS. BigTo LP, BTR, CASS Vangu LP, BTR, CASS Dunhi LP, 8ТЕ, CASS Bell LP, 8TR, CASS 
779 DAWN 263 B. J. THOMAS. 705 CHOPIN 707 RCOASTEREOSYS- 764 MOUNTAIN — 704 BEETHOVEN 117 JAMES GANG 
Bell LP, ВТВ, CASS Greatest Hits Vol. 1 Polonaises. TEMS TEST RECORD Nantucket Sleighride Piano Sonatas Live tn Concert 
Scept LP, ВТЕ, CASS Yorks LP, ВТВ, CASS Yorks LP Windt LP. Yorks LP, ВТВ, CASS. ABC LP, BTR, CASS. 


See for yourself why 


‘over 2% million record and tape collectors paid $5 to join Record 


Club of America when other record or tape clubs would have accepted them free, 


‘TYPICAL MANUFACTURER OWNEO 
RECORO ОК ТАРЕ CLUBS. 


[ч E econo cut or ammen 
Er mr 

No но ES! оскус 
nu 
pu 0 12 

[т EI 

u [5 
E E] [E ER 
OBLIGATION Li. 
CAN YOU eur | ‘Your dis 

m NO амаз 
per 
E] YES YES NEVER! ys Cart ar 
rt sera nen 
NS IND LUN: «t raer cese 
Ld E oW NN "wa TM 


RECORD CLUB OF AMERICA —The World's Largest Record and Tape Club 


TYPICAL 
"EXTRA DISCOUNT" SAL 


$4.98 LPs average as low as $1.91 
$9.98 LPs average as low as $2.11 
$6.98 LPs average as low as $2.39 
Savings Of 61% or more from recent Club sales up 
to $4.39 per LP. Start these giant savings now... 
not after you fulfill your obligation like other clubs. 
Average 
list — Club 
label Price 
PAUL McCARTNEY/WINGS— 
Wild Lite Apple 598 
ALICE COOPER killer. WarBr 5.98 
CAROLE KING MUSIC Ode 5.98 
SLY & THE FAMILY STONE— 
There’s A Riot Goin’ On ii 5.98 
BOB DYLAN—Greotest Hits 
Vol.1 6.98 
JUDY COLLINS—Living 5.98 
GRAND FUNK— 
E Pluribus Funk i 5.98 
SESAME STREET 2 5.98 
JOHN DENVER—Aerie 5.98 
KRIS KRISTOFFERSON— 
Silver Tongued Devil & I 4.98 


(ridge Worth 
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TO BUY ANYTHING EVER! 


Yes, take your pick of these great hits right now! Choose any 3 Stereo LPs (worth up to $20.94) or any 1 Stereo Tape (cartridge 
or cassette, worth up to $13.96) FREE...as your welcome gift from Record Club of America when you join at the low lifetime 
membership fee of $5.00. You can defer your selection of FREE items and choose from an expanded list later if you can't find 
3 LPs or 1 Tape here. We make ti ig offer to introduce you to the only record and tape club offering guaranteed discounts 
of 33576 to 79% on all labels—with no obligation or commitment to buy anything ever. As a member of this one-of-a-kind club 
you will be able to order any record or tape commercially available, on every label—including all musical preferences. No automatic 
shipments, no cards to return. We ship only what you order. Moneyback guarantee if not satisfied. 


205 ROD STEWART 118 THREE DOG NIGHT 907 DONNY OSMOND 043 FIDDLER ON THE 770 PARTRIDGE 830 NEIL DIAMOND 778 STANPEDERS 
Every Picture Harmony To You With Love, ROOF Original Sound: — FAMILY SOUND Sweet City Woman 


Gold 
Tells A Story Dunhi LP, 8TR,CASS Donny track (2 record set) MAGAZINE Uni LP, BTR, CASS Bell LP, 8IR, CASS 
Mercu LP, SIR, CASS UniAr LP. BTR, CASS Bell LP, BTR. CASS 


MGM LP, STR, CASS 


ЕФ г: 


се 


(E raei 


P > E 
370 JAMES TAYLOR & 119 GRASS ROOTS 774 STH DIMENSION 060 JESUS CHRIST S05 2001:A Space БВУ MUDDY WATERS 123 STEPPENWOLF 
The Flying Machine Their 16 Greatest Hits — Reflections SUPERSTAR Odyssey Live At Mister Kelly's For Ladies Only 

Eupho LP Dunhi LP, BTR, CASS Bel LP, BIR, CASS (2 record set) MUM LP, BIR, CASS Chess LP, BTR Dunhi LP, BTR, CASS 


163 STH DIMENSION 905 ROBERT GOULET зэ THE 101 STRINGS 09291, BTR, CASS 


Love's Lines, | Never Did А5 Beatles’ Million Seller 773 LAWRENCE OF 353 THE 101 STRINGS NOW YOU CAN 


Angles & Rhymes. 1 Was Told Hits ARABIA Soundtrack Love Slory > 
Bell LP, ВТЕ, CASS MGM LP, ETR, CASS Alshi LP Bell LP, BTR. CASS Alshi LP CHARGE IT, TOO! 
ж س‎ -— MEO eno Scene m Tar Hq QUINTESSENTIAL ПЕ EE AMERICA | 
lomemade. jorn In Canada- апа In The Han RECORD CLUB OF AMERICA 
MGM LP, ВТЕ, CASS Wand LP, ВТВ, CASS KamSulP,8TR, CASS Chiar LP, BTR, CASS. 1 CLUB HEADQUARTERS 1 
Д YORK, PENNSYLVANIA 17405 Х9708 | 
ч ^ 1 Я 
АТ LAST A RECORD AND TAPE CLUB WITH NO “OBLIGATIONS”—ONLY BENEFITS! Vastu (ee A Telle Mequtera ol Cam TAE i 
Ordinary record апа tape clubs make you choose (о small handling and mailing fee for your tree | Giant Master LF в Tape Catalog, ard Dise & Tape | 
froma few labels usually their own! They make LPs or tapes will be sert later), М you can't find 1 Guide at this Special Membership Offer, Also send | 
jo Buy up to 12 records or tapes a year— 3 LPs or 1 tape here, you can defer your selec- fie the 3 FREE os or 1 FREE. tape which 1 hove 
usually at list price—to fulfill your obligation. tion and choose from expanded list later. This | indicated below (with a bill for a small mailing and 1 
And if you forget to return their monthly саға entities you To LIFETIME NEMBERSHIP—and you [handling charge). 1 enclose my $5.00 lifetime mem. | 
they send you an item you domt want and a bill never pay another club fee. Your savings have | bership fee. This entities me to buy any LPs or tapes | 
for $4.98, $5.98, $6.98, or $7.98! In effect, you oy more thin made up for the nominal mem- ИЕ: discounts р to 79%, pius а smalt таштап | 
may he charged almost double for your records ip fee. | handling charge. Г am not obligated to buy any rec. | 
and tapes. WOW YOU CAN CHARGE IT 1 ords or tapes no yearly quota, it not completely | 
BUT RECORD CLUB OF AMERICA И you prefer, you may charge your membership delighted | may return items above within 10 days 
ENDS ALL THAT! to p ‘of your credit cards. We honor four dil I for immediate refund of membership fee. i 
We're the largest ali-abel record and tape club ferent plans. Check your preference and filbin 1 
im the world, Choose any LP or tape (cartridges your account number on the coupon. 1 3 FREE LPs | 
and cassettes). including new releases. No excep- —)Ó 
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Xtusands of all readily available LPs and tapes = s E 
wi our СМО, AUTOMATIC итер you must (cartridges and cassettes) of all labels nchd- | ar C1 Defer Setection-send expanded list. | 
return to prevent shipment of unwanted LPs or ing foreign). ..all musical categories. э рм i 
тетш mien you would have to retur at your FREE Disc and Tape Guide — The Club's own m {| MI H 
Dn expense if you have failed to send written ° Magazine, and special Club sale annowncements < р Мэс | 
notice not to ship). The postage alone for retune which regularly bring you news of fustissued C — | | 
ing these cards each month to the other clubs new releases and “extra discount” specials. g | es ! 
Saa Што, ап шы! S240. We fe OMY o FREE ANY 3 Steren LPs oF any 1 Tape shown то [ city Stole m | 
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HOW CAN WE BREAK ALL RECORD obligation to buy anything ever! Û ansenkemenwrteSo-Ser ё | 
We are the only major record and tape club NOT GUARANTEED INSTANT SERVICE © f CHARGE IT to my credit card. | am charging my [ 
nS пе OP CONTROLLED “NOT SUBSIDIZED AlI LPs and tapes ordered by members are ® ү $500 membership (mailing and handling fee foreach | 
Фу any record or tape menuiacturer anywhere. shipped same day received (orders from the = j FREE LP and tape selected will be added). П 
Meroe “ne аге nor obligated by company pol. Master Catalog may take a few days longer. АЦ © Check опе: Г] Oiners Club — [ Master Charge H 
icy to push any one label. Nor are we prevented RECORDS ANO TAPES GUARANTEED—factory new су 1 [ГЇ] American Express Г) BankAmericard 
by distribution commitments trom offering the and completely satisfactory ог replacements will сс 1 Expiration. 1 
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SPECIAL INTRODUCTORY MEMBERSHIP OFFER MONEY BACK GUARANTEE ш 1 1 
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here (worth up to $20.94) and mail coupon with Join over three million budget-wise record and ^ L Prices vary slightly. 1 
heck or money order for $5.00 membership fee — tape collectors row. e LLLI ume uti 


RECORD CLUB OF AMERICA Тһе World's Lowest Priced Record and Tape Club 


47 


PLAYBOY 


48 


grandpa's attic on а 
holograms, fiber optic polarized 
lenses, kaleidoscopes, gyroscopes. radio- 
wave transmitters, electronic sound m 
ers, a crawhthrough tactile dome—and 


more optical illusions Шап the grear 
p 


Blackstone ever had up his sleeve. Plus 
such esorericaamadeunderstandable as a 
tmonograph (a gravityoperated draw- 
g machine) and a solar harp (a steel 
string strung across a whales jawbone 
with a wooden resonator and vibrated 
by a photocell). 

Мом of these, significantly, are do-it- 
yourselfers, You can light up a Christmas 
исе with your voice, scramble il color- 
TY image with a hand-held magnet, spin 


machin 
size à parabolic mirror. If gam- 
bling is your game. you can pliy a 

electronic slot machine: if it's rock danc- 
ing. n produce your own. personal 


t show beneath flickering strobes in a 


cubicle of dangling foil. ‘The cinematic- 
minded person. сап сате his own 3-D 
movie (if he brings or finds a friend) 
and the armchair critic can judge the 
artistic merits. of compuier-generated 
sculpture and poetry. (The poem on 
display was written by an IBM 7070 in a 


Milan bank. presumably on a slow day.) 
And, if the afternoon is sunny, you can 


sit down—after seen and/or 
played with everything else—and watch 
painting with sunlight. Don't ask us 10 
explain itz yor not only 
1o believe it but to understand it. Public 


homs are 1 
Wednesday 
through Sundi 


wd 7-0:30 
M. 7 
Imission. frec, 


RECORDINGS 


“Whar happened was that Jackie com- 
missioned the thing from Lenny 
could not back down." 
"Well. she knew what she was get 
Jewish Mass for lapsed Catholic: 
Hair, with sacraments.” 
“Actually, its 
Honey Fitz is God, John is the celel 
and Bobby's kids are the boy sopr 
The reactions af the critics are equally 
informative. Mos find Leonard. Be 
stein’s iwoLP Mess (Columbia) blas- 
phemous, boring or in bad taste. In fact, 


а disguised allegory 


nt 


nos. 


while it contains a lor of weak poetry 
(phrases such as "local vocal yokels") 
aud bad puns, the Mass is none of 
these things. It has be ted out that 


Bernstein's music is h: 
ing ay it does on cheap stuff like synco- 
pation and on brass bands and street 
choruses, à West Side Story. Well, the 
icopation often sounds old-fashioned 
and heavy. as in the Gloria, and Broad- 


1, rely- 


way Lennys past keeps echoing in our 
ears (Gospel Sermon: "God Said’). 
But so what? The tritest devices in a 


new context make new effects, and Mass 


contains some fine and exciting music. 
Beginning with Offertory (Section. ХИ), 
the pace and quality of the score im. 
prove until the musical climax is 
reached in Agnus Dei (XV), which 
builds very well into so-called blues sran- 
zas and a complex polyphony involving 
quadraphonic lowdspcakers. The ам 
section, Fraction: “Things Get Broken,” 
Sa good. if surprising. 

* celebrani's crisis of faith. 
The problems of Mass center on ques- 
tions of musical and dramatic necessity. 
Why, for instance, is quadraphonic tape 


drami 


to punctuate the music md ac 
What elect is intended for the 
or fourchannel, performance? Of 
course we ger none of it in sterco, And 
why are rock singers, blues singers. ete. 
specified? What is their d ic role in 


the cclebrant’s. могу? Ts. never clear, 
and Bernstein sometimes just seems to 
he straining 10 be hip and electronically 
an courant. While the dramati 
of the Catholic Mass is real and unques 
tioned, Mass transforms. the liturgy for 
purposes to rell 
The result is 1 
but, as the subtitle 
cc lor Singers, 
у The religious is- 
sues raised. or the contemporary trap- 
pings. or the use of the Roman liturgy 
have both offended and pleased a lor of 
people. Bur the real ambiguity of the 
work is whether Mas celebra 
charist or man's crisis of faith. 
both? Bernstein seems to think 
nd has made music to prove it. 
Producers Kenny Gamble and Leon 
Hull of Philadelphia are still putting 
our that di r&b sound that has 
lured top singers, from time to time, to 
record with them, reconstitute their own 
vocal image and incidentally sell a few 
hundred thousand more records. The lat- 
ext candidate for treatment is Laura Nyro. 
It is a measure of her individuality 
that Genre Toke = Mirade (Columl 
doesn't sound like the typical Gamble- 
Huff product. C-H provides the obliga- 
tory background chorus—here it’s three 
ladies calling themselves T 
none of the songs or arrangements 
Laura's, Monkey Time sounds like a 
ne rocking Nyro tune but isn" 
Spanish Harlem is not at all her kind 


Ss own operatic the 
celebranr's. story 
oratorio nor oper 


it, "A "Theater 


her 


it can 


of song, but she makes it work for 
her; Jimmy Mack is а throwaway. but 
her voice and th angement carry it; 
and so on. The Gamble-Hulf m 
may be working, but so is Laura 
Куго. 


Bobby Short is a performer who in- 
spires a polarity among his auditor 
One cither flips over his material and 
the way he handles it or loathes it with 
а vengeance. We place ourself in the 
former category and so can only ap- 
plaud the new double LP, Bobby Short 


Loves Cole Porter (Аца 
be described д 


0). Short. could 
musical comedy's inde 
atigable archaeologist. He has uncovered 
more forgotten melodies and lyrics that, 
on being refurbished Shortstyle, have 
proved their ability to stand. up under 
the test of time. The Porter album is à 
gem and includes three previously. un- 
published songs plus nearly a score of 
malloyed delights from. such shows as 
Fijty Million Frenchmen, DuBarry Мах а 
Lady and Gay Divorce. A lavishly reward- 
ing Porter pilgrimage 


Alice Cooper, with its pop drag«queen 
outfits. live snakes and pscudo-veodoo 
mumbo jumbo, would simply love to 


win the Most Ourrageous Act. Award. 
Well. it's not going то get ас because 
onstage the group's we're-weird-and-evil 


trip comes out caruy-show cornball—bur 
it has put out an album that's consider 
blv berter than its live show. In. places. 
Killer (Winner Bros) gets emb 
especially on Dead Babies, a piece ot 
cheapshor necrophile ait rock. But. on 
cuis such ах Under My Wheels, Be My 
Lover and Yeah, Yeah, Yeah, Mice puts 
ош a rough machineshop Detroit sound 
that’s nice "п" nasty. It isn't The Rolling 
tones, but then, the Stones don't need 
live snakes. 


asing, 


tiveEvil (Columbia) is 
forward of his Bitches Brew 
rk album was of his pre- 
vious works. Davis is rewriting the km- 
guage of contemporary music; his groups 
expand or contract as befits the occasion: 
the umentation is becoming more 
and more engineered and electric with 
multiple keyboards and multiple per 
cussion. His trumpet. itself is a 
ing brass for some of the most absorbing 
ideas put forth today. There are four 
xtended cuts, any one of which will 
wipe you out. Our particular favorite is 
What 1 Say, а hypnotically stunning tou 
de force. 


about 
as that land 


sound- 


David Amram i musically une: 
able. He is. literally, ino everything 
No More Walls (RCA) gives ample evi- 
dence of that. From his Shakespear- 
ean Concerto, Autobiography for Strings 
and “King Lear" Variations, which 
employ a classical ensemble. thro 
Waltz from “After the Fall” with such 
jazz artists as Pepper Adams and Jerry 
Dodgion. to Tompkins Square Park 
Consciousness Expander, a Near Eastern 
knockout, Amram shows neither conde 
scension toward mor incomprchension 
of amy idiom. He performs on piano. 
French horn. guitar, Clarke. Bombay 
and Pakistani flutes. bouzouki and—just 
то show wi renaissance man he 
really is—the kazoo and headbone. 

Ever since Cream split up and The 
Who got turned on to mellow Moogs. 
good hard rock has gotten harder and 


wi 


“I could take this all year long, Miss Abernathy.” 


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PLAYBOY 


harder to come by. 
off Led Zeppe 
side lately. leaving pure hard rock in the 
noisy hands of the louder-is-betr 
amine crowd: dull music buzz 


KENWOOD KT-7001 ош of 300 amps, a combined assault on 


the threshold of pain. With one large 


REALLY TURNED exception: Humble Pic. Its Performance / 


Rockin’ the Fillmore (A & d rock the 


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punch, bur also full of those quiet 
places and changes of mood that make 


Hirsch-Houck Labs report... you feel the punches. ¢ most double 
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Quoted from Jan,’72 Stereo Review Need No Doctor and Ray Charles's Hal- 
lelujah (1 Love Her So) ave as good as 


it gets—and worth getting stuck with 
two sides that never 


Madman Across the War 
other big Elton John-Ber 
Dudgeon-Paul Buckmaster production 
Sa it's not ne: ly up to the 
caliber pf its predecessor in this geme, 
Tumbleweed Connection, though there 
is some good music here; eg., Tiny Dancer 
and Levon. When they can be hea 
above the clamoring strings, choir 


| so forth, Ено staccato p 
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? ments. So does Davey Johnstone's man 
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For some time, it’s been evident that 
the 5th Dimension is the classiest pop 
ing group around. Not so evident is 
the superiority of its concerts to some of 
its studio recordings. In The Sth Dimen- 
sion / уе! (Bell), its adlib vocal dex- 
terity and the excitement it generates 
ally displayed in two well recorded, 

ULprogramed LPs. Much of the set is 
given over to the Laura Nyro and Jim 
Webb tunes that have made the group 
famous (and vice versa), and it’s good 
to hear these in different arr 
ind formats. The à 
featuring Hal Blaine’s fine drumming 


frequently sounds too much like а pit 


® S : band; but on the whole, it's competent. 

KNIT KICKER 4 е Considerably less invigorating is а one- 
à disc compendium of the ЭШ “greatest 

THE FIRST POLYESTER 1 hits," Reflections (Bell). which has tunes 
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Carly Simon has created a beautiful 
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Here arc songs d. 


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PLAYBOY 


52 


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work and that of four excellent accom 
panying musicians. There is one espe 
Gally fine love ballad, Our First Day 
Together. The title song seems to owe a 
lot harmonically to James Taylor, but 
throughout Carly Simon is very much 
her own wor 


Even the takehim-orleave him. Wag 
nerite will find the voluptuous blandish 
ments of Tannhäuser (London) hard to 
resist in the new recording directed by 
Georg Solti. This classic operatic scrim 

ge between the forces of sacred and 
profane love was never really much of a 
contest. No matter what the libr 
says. the composers s 
clearly on the side of lu ndon— 
particularly so in the souped-up revision 
he wrote for the Paris Opera. recorded 
here in stereo for the first time. Solti 
well understands where the score’s bal. 
ance of power lies. and he responds to 
its luscious locutions with abundant. in 


© 


"s were 


tensity. Abetting him in this impressive 

i e the Vienna Philha 
cast of nowgeneration 
cluding sopranos Helga 
ad Christa Ludwig. ¢ 
эг René Kollo and baritone 
Braun. 


A while back, we reviewed a recording 
of Scoti. Joplin rags lovingly rend 
Joshua Rivkin (April 1971). Noi 
the Biograph label. we have two a 
of the real thing. Transcribed from 
no rolls, Seem Joplin—1916 (which he 
shares with other composers and pianists 
of the era) and Scott Joplin Ragtime Volume 2 
are delightful evocations of the music 
of the century's first two decades. Over 
50 yes later, the music is still vigorous, 
inventive and refreshingly uninhibited 
‘The reproduction of the sound is amazing, 
all things considered. and a triumph of 
creative engineering, 


There is something about Morri- 
son's particular blend of country and 
1&b that we find very pleasing. His sing 
ing con s 10 improve and Tupelo 
Honey (Warner Bros) is his best work 
to date. «К here is good. four of 
them no profiting by the presence 
ol M. J. Q. drummer Connie Kay. Van 
gels imo it with Like a Cannonball 
which has all the dr 
suggests. and demons 
country-blues idiom with When 
Sun Goes Down, on which 
Mark Jordon plays some stirring down 
home piano. 


e that its itle 
es his mastery 


You've got to hand it to Paul Bley 
ever stops trying, A ducspaying jazz 

ardist, pianist Bley is into the 
piano and the synthesizer and the 
two will never be quite the same again. 
The Paul Bley Synthesizer Show (Alilestonc) 


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PLAYBOY 


54 


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а hit, a palpable hit. The seven num- 
bers were composed by Amene Peacock 
and there's a rhythm section that changes 
t Bley aud his incredi- 
ble mind-expanding synthesizer are the 
Stars: they т эй wide and. never 
stumble. 


The Concert for Bangla Desh (Apple) was 
a special moment, а geutle attempt 
to let the power ol rock help a lot of 
people hurt a little less. И was also 
special because we we just coming out 
when our most impor 
ivy dudes, refused to 


of a curious ti 
ant artists, our 1 
show the 
mythmal 
tion to George н Eric Clapton, 
Ringo Starr and Leon Russell, Bangla 
Desh even naged to lu Bob Dylan 
ош of the woodwork—signaling (hat the 
times, they are, c I 
the supergroup didn't set off the spectac- 
r sparks that might be expected, it 
did generate the bes vibes that have 
happened for a while—and enjoying that 
sweet taste alone is almost worth the 
regrettably (and unnecessarily, if stories 
about uncharitable record companies 
е to be believed) high price of the 
рит, There are many textures: Leon 
Russell. whoopin Youngblood, 


indeed, 


through 


Dylan barely clecnified and tooting the 
harp in on Just Like а Woman, 
orge Hanson delicate and moving 


n Something. 105 a concert we'll all 
remember and, since five dollars. per 
album goes for Bangla Desh relict, 
concert we all should own. 


THEATER 


The heartstrong and w 
Stuart and the calculating 
c Elizabeth me classic competitors. 
movic: shave 
ad embellished their conllict. 
ad history's ellect 


books 


d opc 


their effect on history 
on them. (See this month's review of 
the film Mary, Queen of Scots.) Vivant 
Vivat Regina!, Robart Bolts new ¢ 
about the t 
with a chronological and geogr 
that perhaps would be more 
film. From France to Scot- 
England, over a period of about 
the play 
si course somewha 
er to the facts of history than to the 
spice of fiction. Bolts Elizabeth is not 
the vengeful villainess and his Mary i 
not the uplifting heroine of Schiller 
Mary Stuart. aud Bolt makes no 
tempt. as Schiller did, 10 fantasize 
encounter between. iie. ladies. But in 
tying to restore balance, he ends up tilt- 
ing in favor of Elizabeth, Much of this 
imbalance is a result of the perfor 
ances. As Elizabeth, Eileen Atkins is glo- 
rious. Hers is a daring, at times comic, and 


10 avels— 


ails—: 


very complete characterization that mim 
ages to keep the queen imperious yet 
shows the woman—occasionally a vulga 
woman—beneath the legend. Claire 
Bloom, as her adver ds miscast. A 
cool, careful actress, she lacks passion, 
impetuosity and fourish. One cannot 

gine nations at her fect. She reduces 
Mary то а petulant “mooncalf,” to usc 
Elizabeth's description of her in the 
play: and as Mary diminishes, so does 
the play. Furthermore, the argument be 
neath the drama lacks the moral com 
plexity of Bolts 4 Man for All Seasons, 
Yet Vivat! is never dull and is often 
quite theanical. As the two women bat 
Пе for supremacy. it is a triumph lor 
Queen Eileen I. At the Broadhurst, 
West Hth Street. 


Classic myths scem 10 obsess young 

the theater, particularly. rock 
mposers. Among recent symptoms arc 
Salvation (about Christ), coauthored by 
Peter Link, and Blood (abam Orestes). 
aeated by Doug Dyer. This season at 
Joseph Papp's Public Theater, Link and 
Dyer, with an assist from Gretchen Ciye 
have revalued Iphigenia. Their play, with 
the cumbersome title The Wedding of Iphi- 
genio plus Iphigeni 


in Concert, takes its 
petus from Euripides’ two plays about th. 
tormented heroine. There are only three 
characters this version, and two ol 
them. Agamemnon and Clytemnestra 


are minor. But the major character, 
Iphigenia, is played by 12 women. For 


many 
proves 
to dist 


viewers. the — multilphigenia 
a nuisance. [t is difficult at first 
nguish the actresses and to reta 
а focus on the character. When ihe 
Iphigenias form a Greek chorus, the 
lyrics are often smudged. This is not an 
attempt to modernize а myth but. an 
attempt to relate it directly to the lives 
of the performers—and presumably of 
the audience. Some of the rapping be 
tween is sell-conscious-—actresses 
tending to improvise lines 

en. But slowly, rouchingly. the 
women do reveal themselves and their 
confusion. What does Iph; 
them 


For 
mply irrelevant, as 
perhaps most Greek heroines would be 
—out of control, bulleted by fate. 
theatvicalized encounter group, the | 
has a certain fa ion AR d loc mud 
cal, it is truly musical. Опе goes home 
wanting to hear the score to catch 
all the lost lyrics. The сам, obviously 
chosen for their voices, blend splendidly 


some 


Asa 


in concert. In the second and mor 
elective part, they put the plot aside, 
replace Creek gowns with their own 


dothes amd individually (and occasion 
ally together) simply sing Link's power 
ful lamen nson Hall, at the 
New York Shakespeare Festival Public 
Theater, 125 Lafayette 


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Stag, 
Anewkind of Triumph. 


PLAYBOY 


For years, Triumph has been making fine sports cars for people who love cars. Now Triumph 
introduces a sports car which loves in return. 

То all the things that make a true sports car good to drive, the Stag adds all the things thar 
make a car good to ride in. Stag adds power to Triumph's rack and pinion steering and front 
disc brakes. It combines more room and comfort with Triumph's road hugging, independent 
suspension. 

The engine is a big, smooth V8, making the Stag the fastest car in the line. There's true 2 
plus 2 seating, electric windows and a solid, padded roll bar, even when the top is off. 

Big, wide doors make it easy to get in and out, controls are in easy reach of your fingertips, 
and both the reclining bucket seats and the padded steering wheel are fully adjustable. Also 
standard are chrome wire wheels and long-life radial ply tires. 

The Stag is a new kind of Triumph, a powerful over-the-road car built by the biggest maker 
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Options include overdrive, automatic transmission, air conditioning, and the pleasure of test 


S driving the Stag at your nearest Triumph 


dealer. 
For the name of your nearest Triumph dealer. 
call 800-631-1972 toll free. 
In New Jersey call 800-962-2803. 


56 British Leyland Motors, Inc., Leonia, N.J. 07605. 


THE PLAYBOY ADVISOR 


No: tong ago, І talked my virgin g 
friend into sleeping with me. Feeling 
love and also somewhat obligated, 1 lat- 
cr bought her an engagement ring and 
asked her 10 marry me. She is 17 and 
Im 19 and were now engaged 10 be 
married, I'm beginning to realize that I 
don't really Jove her and feel as if we're 
heading for tragedy instead of a happy 
marriage. She stys she loves me very 
much and she is а sensitive person 
whom 1 certainly don't want to hurt. 
I'm afraid my immaturity and thought- 
lessness may end up ruining our lives. Is 
there any way ош? В. L, Seattle, 
V 


ishington. 

The way out is right through the 
front door, explaining that youth and 
inexperience have led you both to a 
premature decision that should at least 
be postponed—if not abandoned. The 
possible pain you could cause your girl 
at this time must be weighed against the 
incalculable pain that would be continu- 
ously compounded in an unloving mar- 
rige. The time is I past when the 
loss of а girl's virginity is cause for a 
shotgun wedding and, in this case, you 
seem {о be holding the gun at your own 
head. Next lime you mistake sexual de- 
sire for marriage fever, think of this 
George Jean Nathan witticism as an 
antidote: “Marriage is based on the the- 
ory that when а man discovers а particu- 
lar brand о] becr exactly to his laste, he 
should at once throw up his job and go 
to work in the brewery.” 


WI, new bicycle is great for exercising 
and I aho derive great ple; from. 
riding it to work, thus avoiding the 
misery of city trafic. But, unfortunately, 
I've become almost paranoid about. the 
possibility of its being stolen. Is there апу 
way I can ease my mind and make ab 
solutely sure my machine won't be ripped 
ol—T. J., San Diego, California. 

Not really. The tremendous increase 
in the demand for bicycles, coupled with 
their short supply and high prices (the 
most popular ten-speed models range 
from $85 to $150), has created а lucra- 


however, that even these precautions 
may not deter a professional thief who 
has boltcutters and the time and oppor 
tunity to use them. AL night, keep your 
bicycle inside your pad—not in an entry- 
Finally, if 
possible, insure it against theft and vegis- 
ter it with the police. 


way, storage тоот or garage. 


The other night, my best friend's hus- 
band made it quite clear to me that our 
Platonic relationship had ended. He 
poured his heart out to me, sating that 
hc was miserable with his wife but felt 
that he and I were suited to each other 
and could be happy together. I'm 22 
and single, but, although hes very at- 
tractive. I have absolutely no feeling for 
him other than as a good friend. This 
would hold true even if he were free. 
I would terminate our friendship except 
that his wife has been my closest friend 
since childhood. Help!—Miss E. S., Nash- 
ville, Tennessee 

Assuming you have made it clear how 
much you value his wife's friendship, 
make it equally clear that you have no 
romantic interest in him—and, as you 
said, wouldn't have even if he were free. 
Refuse to act as confidante and avoid 
being with him in the absence of his 
wife. Discourage him by your attitude 
and he should soon get the point. 


ДА ош Im a tape-recording enthusi- 
ast, it's only recently that I've become 
aware of bootleg tapes. I've also heard of 
counterfeit tapes and pirated tapes and 
wonder what the differences are, if any, 
among the three. Arc they just a nuisance 
to the legitimate tape manufacturer or 
have they really cut imo his sales? I've 
heard the latter but find it. difficult to 
believe.—F. R., Evanston. Illinois 
Bootleg tapes—almost all of them on 
eight-track cartridges—are unauthorized 
copies of authorized recordings. Coun- 
1етјей tapes are bootleg tapes that go as 
Jar as to copy the original labels and 
packaging. Pirated tapes ате unauthorized 
recordings made at live performances. 
None of these forms of theft, naturally, 


LOOK FOR 
THE 
SHEAFFER 
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Of all sterling silver gifts, 
only one carries the 
“White Dot”. 


provide any royalties for the perform- The Sheaffer “White Dot” marks 


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the world’s finest writing instru- 
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right law makes the duplication and s 

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е em the proud craftsmen 


Ш and weigh 180 pounds. Unfortunate 
сатту—опе that's casehardened, with links ly, | am hard of hearing and wear a 


at least 5/16" thick. Keep in mind, hearing aid. 1 don't consider this a 


tive market for stolen bikes. In Chicago, 
for example, some 14,500 bicycles were 
stolen during 1971, of which only 
about eight percent were recovered. 
Nevertheless, some simple precautions 
can substantially reduce the risk of loss. 
When you have to leave the bike out- 
doors, park it in a well-lighted, open and 
heavily traveled area. Lock the frame 
and rear wheel to a tree, lamppost or 
some other solid object with the strong- 
est, heaviest chain and lock you can 


am single, 


SHEAFFER, WORLO-WIDE, A SEE] COMPANY 


PLAYBOY 


Playboy 
presents 
the wild, wild 
West Indies 


Only one of Jamaica’s many hotels has 
swimming, boating, golf, tennis, 
marvelous food, air conditioned rooms| 
and suites, And Bunnies. 

It’s the same hotel (the only Jamaican 
hotel) honored consistently with a 
citation for spectacular entertainment: 
both Playboy-style and Jamaican-style. 
It's Jamaice’s after-dark hotel. 

The Playboy Club-Hotel. 

Wild! 


playboy club-hotel 
АТ ocho Rios * JAMAICA 
For reservations and information, 


contact Hetland and Stevens or your 
Own travel agent. 


ap except when it comes to dac 
ing: then Um reluctant to ask a дй 
as T know she would have a bener 
with someone who has his hearing. I 
realize this is foolish, but I can't bring 
myself to accept the fact that a girl may 
like me the way I am. Can you tell me 
how to overcome this feel 
Deuoit, Michi; 

The worst handicaps ave those of a 
man's own making. Your problem is not 
that of gelling a girl to like you but 
of succeeding in liking yourself. You ате 
blaming your loss of hearing for your 
luck of self-confidence and. self-esteem, 
Since you don't say you wear glass КП 
assume you have good vision—in which 


case, ouy advice is to use your eyes and 
note that men with far less to offer 
аге not handicapped at all in dealing with 
the opposite sex. There is no substitute 
for courage, so lake the bull by the horns 
and ask a girl ont—and consider your 
hearing aid an asset: if her conversation 
bores you, you can always tune her out. 


В. thought that the third finger of 
a woman's left hand was to be adorned 
only with an engagement or wedding 
or both, Thus, | blew my chances with 
lovely girl who 1 thought was betrothed to 
ther but who, it turned out, had 
imply chosen that di 
display her birthstone. IE this is becom- 
ing а common practice, how the hell is a 
guy supposed to tell the difference be- 
tween the rings that sey "hands off" and 
any other kind?—H. M., San Antonio, 
Texas. 

By asking. The girl will find a way to 
lee you, пош whether. “hands off* is a 
policy that applies to you—regardless of 
what kind of ring she’s wearing. 


Tire recent surcharge on imported 
goods and the devaluation of the dollar 
—both designed to help cut the difler- 
ence in costs between imports and the 
equivalents manufactured here—have 
started me wondering just how stil for- 
cign competition really is, For example, 
is it uue that few radios are now 
in the U.S. and that the bulk of 
them are imported?—T. C., New York, 
New York. 

Approximately 88 percent of the home 
radios, 50 percent of the black-and-white 
TV sets, 42 percent of nonrubber footwear 
and an estimated 96 percent of the motor- 
cycles sold in the U.S. during 1971 were 
imported. What is even more surprising is 
that many of the imports bear familiar 
American brand names, such as RCA, 
Philco-Ford, General Electric, Royal 
(typewriters), Spalding (baseball gloves), 
Burroughs (calculators), etc. Such brand- 
name imports are made in overseas plants 
owned by thesc companies, or in foreign- 
owned plants, to specifications set up by 
the American companies. It's not all one 


way, however: a number of plants. are 
being built in the U.S. by foreign-owned 
companies for the manufacture or assem 
bly of products with their own brand 
names. The Sony Corporation, for in 
stance, is building a color-TV. assembly 
plant in San Diego; the Suzuki Spinning 
Company, Ltd., has a textile plant in 
Blacksburg, South Carolina; Toyota iv 
assembling pickup beds for light trucks 
in Long Beach; and the Kikkoman Soy 
Sauce Company is building a plant in 
Walworth 


Readers 
who want do know more about the in 
dustrious Japanese and their growing 
economy are referred to “From Those 
Wonderful Folks Who Bring You . 

оп page 151. 


County, Wisconsin. 


ilfriend and I have а very 
relationship in every way except lo 
In the two years we've been going to- 
gether, we've done a lot of hugging aud 


sex. 


ng, but nothing more. I love her 
ch and Т believe she loves me. 

t I ask h to have 

intercourse, I may end up losing her. Do 


you 


have any suggestions on how | 
might proceed?—M. W., Bloomington, 


You give us по clue as to whether it's 
intercourse your girl. objects lo or any 
physical closeness beyond rudimentary 
hugging and kissing. If she shrinks from 
close physical intimacy entirely, this 
could reflect a situation calling jo 
ing care and reassurance on your part 
and possibly for professional help. On the 
other hand, you say youve never pressed 
her to have intercourse—so how do you 
know she won't? Be a little more post 
tive; try @ nonverbal approach. She may 
be more receptive than you think. 


[| aw the new James Bond flick Dia- 
monds Are Forever and was struck with 
the nce, in the closing scenes, 
between the house where Bond has his 
fight with villain Blofeld's two hatchet- 
women and the house featured in your 
November 1971 issue in A Playboy Pad 
Pleasure on the Rocks. A friend tells me 
that I'm out of my mind, but | insist 
that the houses are one and the same. 
Whos correct]. T, Albuquerque, 
New Mexico. 

You are. The handsome home of inte- 
rior designer Arthur Elrod, just a few 
minutes from downtown Palm Springs, 
and the house in which Bond is almost 
done in by two unfeminine femmes 
fatales are, indeed, the same. 


low- 


mbl 


Wares the right way to pour beer? 
Some of my friends claim that one 
should tip the glass and pour it down 
the side, but I always thought it was 
correct to pour the beer straight in, to 


get a good head and release the flavor of 
the brew.—G. W., M ec, Wisconsin. 

You're on the side of the brewmasters, 
who mainiain that beer without froth is 
hardly heady stuf) 


hai 


Bh the question-and-answer section. of 
a new magazine about sex to which I sub- 
scribe, a reader expressed. surprise that 
masturbation would hold any interest. for 
a married man, The answer, written by a 
medical authority, tended to share the 
reader's sin prise, indicating that mastur- 
bation by a married man is a symptom ol 
sexual immaturity and. might also be an 
indication of emotional. difficulty, Fd al 
ways been neutral in my views on the soli- 
шту sport, bur thy ge set me to 


excl 


wondering: What justification is there for 


masturbation by married men2—R. S. 
New York, New York. 

The same justification there is [or 
anyone, married oi single, young or old: 
It provides pleasure. H's sad that in this 
so-called enlightened age, some sex “аи- 
thorilies” still do their best to find ways 
of instilling guilt about the performance 
of this most common of acts; virtually 
all boys and most girls do it, and an 
estimated 42 percent of married men 
have masturbated. Self-gratification, there- 
fore, is one of the major forms of sex- 
nal outlet. In and of itself, it indicates 
neither maturity, emotional stability nor 
the lack of these qualities. The reasons 
for masturbating (like the reasons for 
doing anything) vary, and it’s these 
that must be examined before any 


judgment can be made about the indi- 
vidual who does it. If a husband prefers 
autoeroticism 10 sex with his wije, for 
example, then we'd guess the marriage 
has a problem (assuming the wife re 
sents her husband's solitary inclinations 


—although it’s possible that some wives 
dont). On the other hand, self-grati 
fication can be a very useful outlet in a 
marriage when spouses ате separated от 
when one or the other is unable or 
unwilling to have intercourse: (because 
of illness, recent childbirth, menstruation, 
depression, cte). It may compensate for 
a difference in the sex drive between 
partners. It may also. provide variation 
and fantasy. Or it may simply be some- 
thing that the ndiidual likes to do, 
bearing in mind that Masters and John- 
son have discovered that the physical 
intensity of a masturbatory climax fre 
quently exceeds that of intercourse. 


АП reasonable quest от jash- 
ion, food апа drink, stereo and sports cars 
to dating dilemmas, taste and etiquette 
—will be personally answered if the 
writer includes a slumped, selfaddressed 
envelope. Send all letters to The Playboy 
Idvisor, Playboy Building, 919 N. Michi- 
gan Avenue, Chicago, Hlinois 60611. The 
most provocative, pertinent queries will 
be presented on these pages cach month. 


Gi : 
Techmatic. 


©1972, The Gillette Company, Boston, Mess, 


59 


Beware of 


8-track systems 


that don't record. 


Not all 8-track systems can 
record. So before you invest in a 
system be aware of what you're 
getting. And what you're not 
getting. Panasonic's Model 
RS-818S lets you record cart- 
ridges. As well as play them 
back. It even has FM/AM and 
FM stereo radios. 

Recording cartridges is as easy 
as playing them. Slide in the 


tape. And youre in the cartridge 
business. You've got an AC bias 
switch, To reduce noise or dis- 
tortion when you're taping. And 
two VU meters. To see if you're 


recording at the right level. 

Then gather the family around 
to listen to your tapes. There's а 
fast forward button to help you 
quickly find that one specia 
song. Апа a switch that has one 
setting for continuous play. 
And another to pop out the 
finished cartridge, in case you 
happen to be napping. You can 
even listen to your homemade 
tapes on any 8-track player in 
your car. 

When you get tired of cart- 
ridges, just turn on our radios. 
The FET transistor brings in 


distant FM stations. And the 
AFC button lets you lock in your 
favorite опе. So “Blowin’ in the 
Wind" won't go drifting along 
with the breeze. 

But whatever part of this 
system you listen to, you'll get 
the same terrific sound from our 
6%" air-suspension speaker 
system. It gives you beautiful 
reproduction on every note. 
From C to shining C. 

Ask your Panasonic dealer to 
show you Model RS-818S. The 
8-track system that deserves to 
be called a system. 


THE PLAYBOY FORUM 


an interchange of ideas between reader and editor 
on subjects raised by “the playboy philosophy" 


WINDING DOWN THE WAR 

Tm writing this letter in behalf of the 
many grunts still in Vietnam. I, along 
with oth read in Stars and 
Stripes ıs [rom home that 
the U.S. troops in Vietnam are now in a 
purely defensive posture. This is so un- 
that none of the infantrymen here 
can understand why it is being said 

On the third day of my first mission 
here in Nam. I came in contact with the 
enemy twice and was in contact wi 
them every day for the next six days. 1 
saw four Gls killed and 19 wounded, 
and 1 personally looked over the bodies 
of seven out of 28 dead North Vietnam- 
ese soldiers. Another time, Alpha Com- 
pany received seven new GIs who cime 
swaight from the U.S, They assured 
everyone that the war was over. Three 
days later, five of the seven were among 
24 wounded out in the bush, Recently 
Delta Company had two men killed in 
an ambush. The war is over for them, 
all right, as it is for all others killed in 
Viemam. 

We're tired of the prospect of getting 
Killed for a nation in which most of the 
citizens think we're out sun-bathing on a 
h. I invite all Americans who be 
Jieve the war is over to come join us for 
a luxurious tour of the Vietnamese jungle. 
Alter all, it’s safe; you said so yourselves. 

Ist 14. Robert A. Gussoni 
APO San Francisco, Calilor 


he 


EXPOSING ATROCITIES 

In the December 1971 Playboy Forum, 
Captain William K. Gregory, Jr, wrote 
that he [elt those who wait until they 
are out of the Service 10 expose war 
crimes are “tin soldiers, and. they cer- 
tainly should throw their medals away. 

During my tour in Vienam, I wit 
nessed several war crimes, In. May 1967, 
1 was on the scene of the rape and 
murder of a Vietnamese girl, During the 
cident. a medic in the next. bunker 
tried lo мор it. He was beaten. first by 
the platoon sergeant and then by the 
lieutenant. A pistol was cocked and put 
against his head, and 1 heard the se 
geant say, "The only reason. you're 
alive is that you're a medic and we need 


you. 
When I returned to base camp, I 
reported the incident to the sergeant 


major and was told to keep my mouth 
shut or 1 would "get a lot of good men 
in trouble.” E then went to the chaplain 


in the hope that he would do some- 
thing. He went to the sergeant major to 
check my story. I was then called before 
the sergeant major and told to keep quiet 
or I might not come back from the next 
operation. alive. 

Two weeks after my release from Serv- 
ice, I went to the major in charge of 
R.O. T.C. on a university campus in thc 
U.S. and told him about the incidents 
and asked for an investigation. He told 
me to get out of his office because “the 
Army doesn't do things like th 

During the time 1 Viemam, 
war crimes were a daily occurrence, and 
many soldiers had the choice of being 
moral and dead or immoral and alive. 
Which would Gregory have chos 

Dennis Stout 
Pahoa, Haw 


was 


MERRY CHRISTMAS—OR ELSE! 
t December, Bob Hope and his 
touring show appeured at the base at 
which Tm stationed as а Navy medical 
corpsman. Many men wanted to see Mr 
Christmas Cheer, but 1 don't enjoy his 
show and didn't plam to auemd. Our 
С.О. had other notions; We weren't 
asked if we wanted to sec the show, we 
were told that we would see it, All 
liberty was canceled amd our normal 
Saturday working hours (7:30 A.M. to 
noon) were extended until five PM. 
We actually һай a choice, ther her 
working four extra hours or attendin: 
Bob Hope's show. 

Alll of this was done with a smile and 
a wish fora very meny Christmas. 

Larry Heffelfinger 
FPO San Francisco, Calilornia 


THE NEW MILITARY 

The much-publicized changes occur 
ring within the military are litle more 
than window dressing offered to an in- 
creasingly discontented group of young- 
er Servicemen. While the Armed Forces 
may point to а particularly enlightened 

ler such as Admiral Zumwalt, the 
s that most local comm 
em are of the same mechanical-mi 
breed that has oppressed Servicemei 
the past. Directives involving ch 
or updating of regulations undergo di 
tic modifications by local c пасі» 
before they arc a 

Practically speaking, the only visible 
the military is the continuing 
drop in the reenlistment rate among first 
termers The education and insight ol 


change 


BRITISH STERLIN 


Give him 
British Sterling, 
The smashing, 
after shave and 
cologne that 
endures. You 
may both go 
down in history. 
So fine a gift 

it's even sold in jewelry stores. 


SPEIDEL, A fitted COMPANY 61 


PLAYBOY 


62 


today’s young men cannot coexist with 
the reactionary, illogical attitudes that 
characterize the Services. 
AT /2 J. Mc 
FPO San Fra 


NAVY ADRIFT 

No sailor has ever 
as has Admiral Zumwalt. who initiated an 
attempt to modernize the U.S. Navy's 
personnel regulations, But after three 
years as an enlisted petty officer, I must 


admit that his policies have affected my 
life in obscure ways, if 


bureaucratic hier- 
pulate policies cs- 
plished by their superio 

I live in a large. comfortable barracks 
in which every four men share а 100m. 
It's new, modern and, in every physical 
respect, а temple of the new military 
enlightenment. But there is an old insti- 


tution behind the modern façade. We 
have daily inspections and, for minor 
infractions, doors are removed along 


with the pretense of privacy. Posters and 
other personal effects are confiscated 
deemed unpatriotic or suggestive by in 
specting officers. Haircuts are still sub- 
ject to disciplinary regulation. Most of 
these local rulings represent a direct 
imposition of cultural values in no way 
related to the discipline required to run 
ient national defense. 
men feel that they are 
tizens and try to act accord- 
ingly, but the illusion that somebody up 
there approves of their efforts ne. 
Admiral Zumwalt may think he's 
helm, but to us it scems the 
adrift in a slow-rolling sea of chaos. 
PO/3 Ron T. Ackerm: 
Kingsville, Texas 


INSUBORDINATE BASTARDS 

In the December 1971 Playboy Forum. 
the letter titled "Murder at Kent State” 
Irom Peter D; le me so uptight 
that 1 would like to express my opinion. 
Although 1 have sympathy for the 
ms’ families, if the students had not 
been there having a demonstration, сай- 
ing the dsmen pigs and throwing 
rocks and bottles at them, they would 
not have lost their lives. 

If these people don't like the United 
States or are too scared to fight for our 
country, they should get ош. Let. them 
try some of their Mickey Mouse games 
in Communist China and see how long 
they would get away with it. I dislike 
bloodshed, but 1 feel Davies’ conclusion 
that the Guardsmen deliberately planned 
to shoot at the students is bullshit. I 
only wish I could have been there to 
shoot a few more of those wise, insub- 
ordinate bastards. 


ics n 


R. J. A. Fox 
Stamford, Connecticut 
Truc, in the U.S. the students at Kent 
State “got away with” protesting—until 


FORUM NEWSFRONT 


a survey of events related to issues raised by “the playboy philosophy? 


"WOMEN'S LIB MARCHES ON" 

PROVIDENCE, RHODE Ist. AND— Thi Rhode 
Island supreme court hos vuled that nei- 
ther the state nov the Federal Constitution 
gives men the right to beat thew wives, 
Appealing а lower court's adverse ruling 
on his divorce petition, a Cranston, 
Rhode Island. lawyer insisted that clob- 
beving his wife was “in accord with his 
fundamental right. to chastise her” and 
that. anyhow, she also had slugged him— 
three times. He argued, “Marriage is not 
a partnership... . Two persons are mar- 
ried into one and the husband is the one. 
To protect the wife from molestation is to 
suborn hei disobedience. When wives ате 
permitted to disobey their husbands with 
impunity, the stability of marriage is 
threatened." [n а written decision, Chief 
Justice Thomas H. Robert dismissed. the 
case as “utterly without merit" and com- 
mented, “I could never agree that one 
of the great natural rights was the right to 
beat your wife” On hearing this, the 
judge whose original decision was upheld 
raised his jist and declared, “Women’s lib 
marches on." 


D ON 

LOY ANGELES department store in 
Los Angeles aroused the ive of some 
feminists by providing a special service 
for male customers who wanted to buy 
clothes or other gifts for women—wives 
or otherwise—without shopping in the 
women’s sections of the store, The mer- 
chaniise was being brought to the store's 
Knight Club, where men could make their 


selections over coffee and haze the bills 
mailed to their offices instead of their 
homes. This arrangement prompted. a 
dozen members of the National Organiza- 
tion Jor Women to stage a protest demon- 
stration and picket the store with signs 
reading MAGNIN's CONDONES ADULTERY. 


COUNTER-CONTRACEPTION 

SACRAMEA For the sec- 
ond year im a row, Govermor Ronald 
Reagan has vetoed legislation that would 
permit doctors to prescribe contraceptive 
pills and devices for unmarried girls 
under 18 without consent of their parents. 
According to Reagan, “Removal of pa- 
rental consent and guidance can only re- 
sult in further deterioration of the family 
unit fo the detriment of the child and 
society in general" 

Meanwhile, the U.S. Department of 
Health, Education and Welfare has issued 
a report criticizing the states for shirking 
thew legal duty as recipients of Federal 
funds to provide women, especially the 
poor, with birth-control information, con- 


traceptives and medical services under the 
Federal Government's illegitimacy pro- 
gram. A national survey found only 12 
slates reporting that they had established 
functioning jamily-planning programs, 
and their combined annual spending to- 
taled only about $2,500,000. 


THE PILL THAT FAILED 

LOS ANGELES—A married woman has 
been awarded damages of $12,000 be- 
cause she became pregnant after a phar 
macist mistakenly gave her slecping pills 
instead of the contraceptive pills pre- 
scribed by her doctor. The award repre- 
sented the jury's estimate of how much 
it would cost to support her unplanned 
child, a boy, for 21 years. Commenting 
оп the case, а newspaper columnist 
quipped that the pharmacy not only 
couldn't fill prescriptions accurately but 
its sleeping pills apparently didn’t work 
either. 


NO CHASTITY CLAUSE 

NEW YORK—A private sexual relation- 
ship is none of a landlord's business and 
does not constitute grounds on which he 
may break a lease, according to a New 
York civil court. A judge ruled that the 
landlord of an Upper Manhattan rent- 
controlled apartment could not evict a 
lenant, an unmarried woman in her late 
20s, simply because her boyfriend occa- 
sionally spent the night in her apart- 
ment, which, the landlord claimed, was 
"[using] the premises for illicit relations.” 
Finding no chastity clause in the lease, the 
judge ruled that the woman's conduct was 
neither illegal under state law nor im- 
moral “given the ethical standardy of the 
day.” On the morality issue, he added. 
“One should say little because there is so 
much to say.” 


ASECTOMY CUTS TWO WAYS 
CHICAGO—A survey conducted by the 
Midwest. Population Center, a nonprofit 
birth-control organization, indicates that 
vasectomy is good. for sex, Of 320 cow- 
ples responding to a poll, 70 percent 
agreed that the husband's vasectomy re- 
sulted in a better sex life for both part- 
ners and 32 percent said that they also 
“get along better together." The 
attributes the increased. harmony to the 
removal of mutual. worries. concerning 
both pregnancy and the use of contracep- 
lives. Thirty percent of the couples simply 
reported that vasectomy had resulted in 
no changes one way от the other. 

On the other hand, the Family Service 
Association of America contends that the 
virtues of vasectomy are overrated and 


center 


the psychological hazards are too often ig- 
nored. Men lacking in self-esteem and 
couples experiencing »-arital problems are 
not good candidates for this form of birth 
control, the association says, citing a study 
of 26 couples whose marriages and sex 
lives deteriorated following vasectomy. 
The study indicated that all. had prior 
problems of one kind or another, usually 
involving dependency, impulsiveness and 
an inability to deal with the normal crises 
oj marriage in a mature way. 


BACK TO BATHING 

MOUNT VERNON, NEW YORK—Consumer 
Reports magazine claims thal women's 
genital deodorant sprays have not been 
adequately tested in the laboratories and 
may be injurious tø some users. Not only 
can the sprays irritate vaginal tissue, the 
publication suid, but “widespread ac 
lising of genital sprays may persuade 
many women with vaginal infections or 
an unsuspected tumor to put off seeking 
medical advice.” Consumer Reports noted. 
that the safest and most effective feminine 
hygiene is soap and water. 


DOESN'T PAY TO ADVERTISE 
sax ыкво 4 Federal court jury 
deadlocked on whether or not “The 


Illustrated Presidential Report of the 
Commission on Obscenity and Pornogra- 
phy" is an obscene book but convicted 
the publisher and Шосе associates on 
charges of sending obscene advertise- 
ments through the mail. The book is a 
reprint of the original Government re 
port. spiced up with some 500 photos 
and illustrations. The jury could not 
decide if the scholarly text made up for 
the pictures, but agreed that the adver- 
tising brochure stressed the illustrations, 
not the scholarship, and had no socially 
redeeming value. The defendants are 
scheduled to be retried on the 
obscenity charge. 


other 


THE F.U. COLLEGE KID 


One man's vulgarity is another's 
lyric. — JUSTICE JOHN M. HARLAN 


NORMAN, OKLAHOMA —Although the 
U.S. Supreme Court has ruled that the 
slogan “Fuck the Draft” is free speech 
protected by the t Amendment, 
Oklahoma’s Court of Criminal Appeals 
has upheld the conviction of a college 
student who was fined 5100 and sen- 
tenced lo 30 days in jail for wearing a 
"shirt bearing only the word fuck. 
Judge Hez Bussey said that the slogan 
might qualify as a political statement, 
but the word by itself is just ат obscen- 
ity. Attorney General Larry Derryberry 
ved. Gayle Welcher, the defendant's 
attorney, argued that free speech was 
free speech and, anyway, her client's T- 
shit message could simply be an acro- 


пут Jor Fine Upstanding College Kid. 
The conviction will probably be ap 
peated, 


POT CROPS UP 

orrawa—Not only are Canadian farm- 
ers starting 10 grow marijuana as а cash 
crop but some are dutifully reporting it to 
the national census office as their crop 
with the highest and most profilable yield 
per acre. Census officials expressed. sur- 
prise that the farmers would admit culti 
valing illegal hemp, but are pleased that 
the pot growers trust them to keep the in- 
formation sirictly confidential, as required 
by law. The declared illegal acreage is still 
relatively small, but already ahead of such 
crops as foxglove, which is used to make 
the heart stimulant digitalis. 

* In Fairbanks, Alaska, supevior-court 
judge Warren W. Taylor decided that a 
16-year-old girl charged with drug posses- 
sion should be tried before a jury of her 
peers—high school students ranging in 
age from I6 to I8. With the grudging ap- 
proval of the prosecutor, the juvenile jury 
heard the case for two days before the 
judge directed a verdict of acquittal for 
lack of evidence. 

+ A team of British doctors, using а new 
X-ray technique, reports finding cerebral 
atrophy (brain-tissue shrinkage) in ten 
subjects who smoked marijuana regularly 
over periods of three to eleven years. 
Writing in the medical journal Lancet, 
the doctors said they strongly suspected 
marijuana to be related somehow to the 
brain damage, but noted that their sub- 
jects also had used other drugs and 
cautioned against drawing conclusions 
from one siudy. 

* The Minnesota supreme court has re- 
fused to revise its earlier stand and has 
upheld the conviction of а young Min- 
neapolis man who received an indeter- 
minate sentence of up to 20 years for 
possessing 1/2800th of an ounce of mar 
juana. The court decided that, under past 
and present statutes, possession of any 
amount of the drug established that the 
state law had been violated. The youth was 
arresled in 1968 and, on recommendation 
of state juvenile authorities, was released. 
in 1970 with his civil rights fully restored. 

+ The Swiss have rejected the U 
petition to extradite Dr. Timothy Leary 
1o California to complete his prison term 
for marijuana possession, but they refused 
to grant him political asylum. The canton 
where he has been living has ordered 
him to leave and it is expected that other 
cantons will do the same. 

+ An Ohio supreme-court justice has set 
aside the 104020-year prison term im- 
posed on an 18-year-old marijuana offend- 
er and sharply criticized the trial judge as 
having a “fixation” and a “closed mind” 
that precluded fairness in drug cases. He 
has ordered the case assigned to another 
judge for the sentence to be reconsidered. 


Jour of them were shot to death; whereas, 
in China such a demonstration probably 
could not even gel started. Another differ- 
ence is that no one in China protests the 
shooting of demonstrators. 


JUSTICE AT KENT STATE 

As 1 entered my 15th month of service 
in Vietnam protecting the principles of 
democracy and freedom, а drama 
enacted centering on my home 
of Ohio that made a mockery of all that 
1 and others have done here. At Kent, 
Ohio, 95 persons were indicted and five 
of them were tied for involvement in 
the Kent State massacre of May 1970 
All of them were on the side that wits 


жаз 


state 


shot at. Not a single Ohio National 
Guardsman who pulled a tigger on that 
has had to stand before a jury 10 

for his actions. Has our legal 


system now become so corroded that we 
prosecute the victim and exonerate the 
aggressor? 


FPO San Fra 


The 
down by the now-discr 
County, Ohio. grand jury ag: 
State faculty members, students 
demonstrators have been dropped. T 
action has sparked a sort of "Well, that's 
ponse from several so-called lib- 
eral newspapers, with the unkindest cut 
of all coming from Time magazine: "Kem 
State, the bitter climax to campus rebel 
lion, is about to pass into history." 1 
find it hard to believe that Ohio's in- 
ability to prosecute the res of those 
indicted because of lack of evidence 
somehow balance the scales 
4 down with the bodies of those 
1. If this is America's new cor 
cept of justice, then we might just as 
well retum 10 the simple-minded ritual 
of walking on hot coals to determine 
guilt or innocence. It would be a hell of 
lot cheape 
The notion now seems 10 be that we 
should forget about Kent State and let 
the dead rest in peace. This sentiment is 
emphatically not shared by more than 
10.000 students who have petitioned 
President Nixon for a Federal grand 
jury investigation, nor by the parents of 
the four killed by Ohio National Guard 
gunfire. In their letter to Time, the four 
mothers wrote 


and 


should 


Ir has become all too painfully 
clear to us that the lives of our sons 
and daughters are to be sacrificed 
оп the altar of political expediency 
in a country posturing to the world 
s the citadel of equal justice for 
IL Our children were killed with- 
out so much as a token gesture to 
their Constitutional rights to due 
process of law. Yet Time magazine 
ied with the wad- 
us lives lor the 


63 


PLAYBOY 


64 


ndonment of a few prejudici 
indiaments, and willing to accept 
ade as a fitting epilog to the 
tue tragedy. 


Congress now seems to be the last 
hope dor justice in a tragedy that 
been manipulated into a political preve 

Peter Davies 
Staten. Island, New York 


DUMP NIXON 
In 1968, Richard Nixon ran for Presi- 
dent of the United States on the prom- 
je that he would end the war in 
Indochina, and the voters clected him. 
Аз 1 write, it appears that by the middle 
of this summer there will be 40,000 to 
50,000 men left in Vietnam. That's not 
enough to launch any offensives, but it's 
enough to keep those weekly casualty 
lists coming. 
Meanwhile, the air war continues. By 
the end of 1971, the U.S. had dumped 
three times as many tons of bombs оп 
Indochina as were dropped in all of 
World War Two by both sides On 
occasion, Nixon has threatened to step 
up the ial offensive, and the possibil 
ity of using nuclear weapons—the one 
atrocity the U.S. has yet to comi 
this war—lurks ever in the background. 
Nixon has not kept his promise to 
end the war In 1964, Lyndon Johnson 
was clected on the pledge that he would 
not widen the war, and after failing to 
live up to his word, he withdrew from the 
subsequent Presidential race. It is a bit 
much to expect Nixon to withdraw volun 
tarily, so the electorate will have to retire 
him. For too long this man has insulted 
the intelligence of the American people. 
James Stewart 
Kansas City, Mis: 


uri 


STOP-THE-WAR BALLOT 

Given a clear choice, would the Ame 
an people vore to end. the war now? 
The Chicago chapter of Business Execu- 
tives Move for Vietnam Peace tried last 
fall to answer that question with a stop- 
the-war ballot. Eight thousand registered 
voters in six Ilinois Congressional dis 
піс were presented with this ballot, 
which offered 

cise statements 


choice between two con 


that the undersigned 
would vote for “a qualified opponent of 
Richard Nixon” and against his current 
Congressman if all U.S. military person 
nel were not out of Vi um, Laos and 
Cambodia by December 31, 1971; or 
that the voter approved of the present 
conduct of the war. To give the ballot a 
rigorous test, B. E. M. chose 
resented by Congressional hawks and 
precincts within these districts that had 
given Nixon la n the 1968 
election. 

ОГ those. who 


voted, 
supported the December 31 di 
the v 


727 percent 


on 


Fach of the six Congressmen received 
а set of the ballots for his own district 


and all sets were sent 10 the White 
House and to Ilinois Senators Adlai 
Stevenson and Charles Percy. One mem- 
ber of the House who is a longtime 
supporter of the war said he would vote 
for the House version of the Mansfield 


Amendment (setting a time limit lor 
withdrawal of American troops). Another 
Representative, whose district was not 


polled, also decided to support the Ma 
field. Amendment, alter seeing the results 
of the stop-thewar ballot. When the 
House considered a motion to bring 
the Mansfield. Amendment to the floor, 
the motion lost in the face of i 
Administration lobbying. Even so. 


tense 


ady 


Gottlieb, director of the Committee for 
a Sane Nuclear Policy, said that the 
B.E.M. poll was responsible for the 


switch of at least 30 votes on the issue. 
On the strength of its qualified success, 
B. E. M. iy helping other groups amd in- 
dividual citizens organize similar ballots 
precincts elsewhere in the county. 
Jerry Alexander 
Business Executives Move 
for Viemam Peace 
Chicago, Illinois 


BURNING DOWN THE COUNTRY 
Like James Abel, I am sickened by the 
k of wisdom and compassion 
shown in the sadistic sentences given to 
Connie and John Eye (The Playboy 
Forum, November 1971). However, I dis- 
gree with Abel when he sides with those 
who hate this country. In response to his 
statement “When the time comes to bum 
it down, the number of helping hands 
will be le, ı to say that, should 
that time come, I will be standing in line 
to piss оп the matches and on those who 
would light them. 


James P. Reilly 
Bayside, New York 


“WAR IS NOT HEALTHY . . - 

One of the first casualties in 
war is justice. Going back through 
American history, one finds that when- 
been involved. in war а 
spirit of jingoism has swept through the 
people, inciting them to silence peace- 
makers without regard for any sense of 
The following is a sad story 
tes this. 
1970, 


any 


illustr 

In Dece: тоно, а 
teacher Hementary 
School, New York, hung a peace poster 

Chrisim: incorpo 
well-known slogan of the antiwar group 
Another Mother for Peace, “War is not 
healthy for children and other living 
things.” She did not obey the principal's 
order that she remove the poster, and the 
Mahopac school board fired her for in- 
subordination. She wok her case to court 
в has had no succe 
ing reinstatement. Me: 
qualified teacher, she has 
pplications to teach i 


Kathy M 


in obtain- 
as a well 

nade numerous 
other schools in 


but so 


nwhile, 


АП but one 
disagreement 


the where she lives 
turned her down, and 
pout teaching methods. not related to 
her politics, prevented her from taki 
that job. Now she's working 
п for two dollars an hour. 
cheerful and says the work 
lends itself to meditation 

Our schools prate about inculcating 
moral values in children, so what have 
Kathy Marcato's former students learned? 
Perhaps that to love peace is reprehensi 
ble and to insist on freedom of expression 


s a serul 
An ex 


subordinate. 


William С 
Boston, Ма 


MORE MORAL THAN THOU 
1 read Bill Barney's December | 
attack on George Brown's September 
1971 Playboy Forum letter and shook 
my Barneys naiveté. After 
condemning white Western. civilizati 
as “bankrupt” and charging that 
pean settlers and their armies pushed 
the Indians to the verge of extinction,” 
Barney turns around and praises our 
current crop of would-be revolutionaries 
for their high level of morality. Doesn't 
Barney understand that the holier-than- 
thou attitude displayed in his final 
paragraph reeks of the same smug sell- 
ghteousness of which every white land 
grabber stank. from the Puritan fathers 
to George Armstrong Custer? It's no 
surprise to me that some of today’s 
Young people have found it ап casy 
jump from the role of SDS 1 
to that of Jesus freak. The 
holds out no hope of healthy cl 
long as it is blinded by moral fanaticism 
and looks upon its leaders as secular 


hcad over 


James Leopold 
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania 


PERSECUTED MINISTER 
The Reverend Keith M. Rhinehart is 
list medium and the 
and founder of the Aquarian 
Foundation in Seattle, Washington, an 
ied church that has be 


an a series of TV broadcasts to 
discuss a variety of controversial subjects, 
including morality, sex and the law, and 
psychic phenomena. After the first broad- 


cast, the programs were canceled by 
the TV station, One week Later, Rhine- 
hart was arrested. xused of oral 


tly convicted 
ice of ten. 
the history of the 


ngton has anyone received 


sodomy. He was subseque 
and give 
ars. Never before 
te of Wast 


en false 
police pressure. The 
conviction was reversed in November 1969 
by a U.S. District Court, on the grounds 
that the state of Washington. knowingly 


that d 
under 


m 
stimony 


A 


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about overseas delivery, dial 
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PLAYBOY 


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used perjured testimony and knowingly 
withheld evidence to win its case. 
Rhinehart was released from prison 
alter having served two and a hall years, 
but the мше of Washington was ap 


parently not satisfied with che nt 
of sufleing he had undergone, even 


though he developed. cancer in prison 
was refused treatment and had lo he 
operated on shortly after he got out. The 
stae took its case to the Ninth Circuit 
Court of Appeals, which upset the reversal 
on the ground that the previous court 
Had set “a standard of state prosecutorial 


conduct that is ealisuic.” Rhinehart is 


presently at liber 
боп, but he is not on parole and 
legally must serve the remainder of his 
sentence. He and his supporters are now 
waiting to see whether or not the state 
will act on the appeal court's verdict and 
сат him off ıo prison again. 

What justification is there for the in- 
tensity and persistence with which sta 
officials have hounded Rhinehart? We 
believe the answer is that his religions 
views are so repugnant to some people 
in positions of power that they will 
use any means at all to silence him. The 
Americi an Brotherhood Alliance is call 
for public attention to the injustice 
st Keith M. Rhinehart 
and de investigation of all city 
county, state a s con 
nected with the ca 

Weston D, Bailey 
American Brotherhood Alliance 
Lynnwood, Washington 


subject to travel ıe 


committed a 


REPENTANCE BE DAMNED! 

The Reverend Ben Rogers plaintive 
plea, "Will we ever understand. what 
the Gospel stresses? Christ died for all 
men!” (The Playboy Forum. November 
1971). demands а reply that is not 
favorable to Christianity. He's only re 


pening the doctrine of vicarious 


ment, which teaches that Jesus death 
for all men satisfies the need for punish 
ment demanded by divine justice, and 


thus allows God ло forgive men all of 
their most horrible sins, if they will but 
repent. Bullshit! Man с 
burden of g 


эч mansfer his 


ilt onto Jesus in order to 
clear the hum: 
sive sins as the wars in which we are 
engaged today. 

ion is. will we ever under- 


conscience of such mas 


it we are personally responsible 
for everything we do and thar no onc 
Only 
man can right the wrongs that he has 
created. 


else can atone for our evil doing? 


The Rev, Joseph B. Wilson 
New York. New York 


HEAD-SHOP HARASSMENT 
es dp seems that Americans arc 


e most intoler 


people on earth, My 
tribulations as ом 


r of à head shop— 
one of those little stores that sell counter 
culture clothing and paraphernalia—have 


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Chair-high seats to keep you 
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And the Wagoneer has options like air.con- 
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No wonder the Jeep Wagoneer outsells all 
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Test drive one today. 


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УЕ Jeep 


Drive your Jeep vehicle with care and kecp America the Beautiful. 


confirmed this notion. After I bought the 
shop, the Hammond, Indiana, police made 
repeated visits to it. They seemed to feel 
that they could find every runaway in the 
state hiding among the posters. Needless 
to this constant police attention 
didn't enoo 


my customers to come 
back. A local woman radio commentator 
mised а hue and сту against my den of 
iniquity. telling her audience that 1 was 
corrupting the morals of youth, should 
be run out of town, and so on. My 
children were denounced and slandered 
by their teachers and were followed to 
and from school daily by police in squad 

ıs. Encouraged by parents and teachers 


number of the kids daily taunted. and 


sulted them 

One day, a plaindothesman bought a 
copy of the underground newspaper Ka 
leidoscope at my shop and the police then 
arrested my manager for selling an ob 
scene newspaper. We won that case De- 
fore a three-judge Federal court uh. 
found the newspaper not obscene and 


declared. part of an Indiana statute on 


obscenity unconstitutional as well 

Next. the police raided my home and 
tabs of LSD and a quantity 
of marijuana. Under all ће pressure, 
L made the mistake of running off to 
California with one of my daughters. Cali- 
fornia police arrested me and sent us 


found 


back. P was suffering from dangerously 


high blood pressure, but he Indiana 
e failed to provide the prescribed 
medication. While they detained. me, the 
police arrested one of my daughters for 
curlew violation and kept her in à home 
for days. The end of all this 
came when one witness admiued plaming 


po 


and another stated 
ın bring in rhe 
marijuana. Both witnesses testified. that 
the police had forced them with bribes and 
threats to sign false complai inst me. 

Now I'm suing the police chiel of Ham- 
mond for harassment. I've enlisted the 
help of a couple of radio and television 


the acid in my home 


that she saw а police: 


stations in this area. Individual freedom 
may come to Indiana yet, One interesting 
side light on the case is that there are 
now several local head shops and they 
€ evidently enjoying а quiet. existence 
May they survive and. prosper. 

“Mother Mary" Henley 

Hammond, Indiana 


AMBASSADOR'S DIPLOMACY 

I have just noted your Playboy Forum 
editorial comment on our “New F 
About Marijuana” 
ber 1971). Your criticism of our use of 


pamphlet. ( 


“Dr.” Luis Souza as an authority was 
well founded. We are truly embarrassed 
that such a mistake was published and 
distributed widely before being noticed 
Such mistakes happen im the best of 
publications, as your staff must know. 

The point is though, that we noticed 
our own mistake long before rLAYmoY 
reader William R. Fiedler or The 


“Filter and Menthol: 16 mg. "iar 


E 
11 ng. nicotine av. per cigarene, FIC Report Аід. 67 


PLAYBOY 


68 


Playboy Forum publicly castigated us. 
Months before, we had checked up on 
this person, found his credentials lacking 
and excised him [rom our current print- 
ing. In our current booklet, you will not 
find his name nor his quote, Since you 
bothered to call 5t. Dismas Hospital to 
check on Souza's credentials, perhaps you 
should have also called us. 
Gary Alexander 
Ambassador College Editorial 
Pasadena, Californ 
When we received Fiedler's letter, we 
called Ambassador College Press and. 
asked for a copy of “New Facts About 
Marijuana.” The edition we got con- 
tained the paragraph оп Luis Souza. 
Another reader has since sent us the 
revised edition. In place of the Souza 
paragraph there now appears а photo of 
a billboard bearing this legend: 


LAURA 
8/12/50 
3/1569. 
NARCOTICS TOOK HER LIFE 


The photo is captioned just “охе more” 
DRUG TRIP COULD TAKE А LIFE. In the con- 
text of a booklet about marijuana, we 
think the implications of this photo ave 
just as inaccurate as the Souza allegations 
that it replaces. 


SENTENCED TO 25 YEARS 
The insane persecution of marijuana 
users by Texas courts continues. A 20- 
wold man in Fort Worth, Texas, who 
pleaded guilty to a charge of possessing 
marijuana, has been sentenced to 25 years’ 
imprisonment, A quarter of a century- 
than his entire present life 
time—that sentence will leave this youth 
almost a middleaged man by the time 
. It seems to me that rather 
than take away the prime years of a 
man’s life, it would be more humane 
just to shoot him. 
Please do not print my name; I am in 
law-enforcement work myself. 
(Name withheld by request) 
Dallas, Texas 


he gets ot 


LIGHT UP AND LIVE! 
o I got busted in 
two 


The charges 
felonies (possession of marijua 
session with intent to sell 
ng sentences of 


meanors about as serious as walking with 
the intent to loiter. The evidence: two 
joints and a bigmouthed teen 

Fortunately, | got a lawyer 
continuance and was 
sonal recognizance. But keep 
the slammer still cost me a incanor 
plea and about $3000, and the constant 
hassle сой me even more in paranoia. 
At least I'm free and not locked away like 
some poor bastards. 

It would be nice if gra 


and а 


ized, but the problem is, besides the old 
morality bit, that the people who traffic 
in the stuff aren't about to let themselves 
get railed with pot taxes. OF course, if 
pot ever is legalized, there'll probably 
be not only taxes to contend with but 
so many provisos and riders that you'll 
have to go 19 а hospital t0 have a toke. 

Perhaps the best advice is, ger as high 
as you want as often as you want, just so 
you never carry any more stulf than you 
can eat quickly. 


Paul Tyne 
Salida, Colorado 


A NEW DIRECTION 

A high percentage of the people in 
prison today have been convicted of drug: 
related crimes. America's prisons are ill. 
equipped to deal with these people, and 
many drug addicts will leave prison. in 
worse shape than when they entered, Ad- 
dicts should be placed in hospitals or 
institutions designed to cope with their 
problems, with particular emphasis on 
psychotherapy. 

Here at the Maryland Correctional 
‘Training Center, we've formed a sel-help 
group called Scekers After а New Direc- 
tion (SAND). We don't want to go back 
to addiction and crime when we get out; 
we've wasted enough of our lives behind 
these walls, 


Pete Kambouris 
Hagerstown, Maryland 


REHABILITATION OR REVENGE? 

Over two years ago, Frank Nubin was 
released from San Quentin prison and, 
since that time, he has lound a new job. 
and a new wife and is living peacefully 
and productively. Now, however, the 
state of California has discovered that 
Nubin was released prematurely—be- 
cause of its own clerical error—and wants 
to send 1 k to San Quentin. An 
appeals court has decided Nubin owes 
the state ten more months of his life. 

I have written the following letter to 
Governor Reagan regarding this travesty 
of justice 


m ba 


As prisoner reform and rehabil 
tion are, to quote you, "of utmost 
importance,” I am interested in 


knowing how the sending of a reha- 
bi 


ed man back to San. Quentin 
п benefit either the stite or the 
prisoner. True rehabilitation comes 
when a former criminal is able to 


hold a job, maint tua- 
n, take a normal part in society 
and cease 10 be a burden to the 


state. It would seem 
months of such stable living would 
cause us to judge Frank Nubin as 
rehabilitated. Would you tell me, 
then, what justifies the incarceration 
of this man? What effect would the 
state expect such an incarceration 
e on this man when he i 


that ny 


released. ten. months hence? Would. 
one expect him to be released feel- 
ing respect for justice and fairness 
and optimism toward the rewards of 
living a rehabilitated life in society? 


CLEANING UP PRISONS 

The irrational and self-defeating cru- 
elties inllicted by the U.S. prison system 
upon hundreds of thousands of Ame: 
s have finally penet 
consciousness. Unfortu 
d 
obscure New York State prison to do it. 

Long before Attica, however, the 
American Ci s Union had de- 
cided to try to do something about the 
system. In September 1970, the A. C. L. U. 
formed the National Commitee for 
Prisoners’ Rights, to pull together and 
coordinate the various ellorts by lawyers 
and others. With the help of a generous 
grant from the Playboy Foundation, the 
A.C. L. U, has brought over 40 lawsuits, 
ranging from attacks on а bresd-and- 
water di egated confine- 


ment to forcing access to facilities for 
the pres. Through 


members of 
committee, the 
litigation and other strategies fc 
has issued the first newsletter on prisoners? 
ights and has conducted a national con- 
ference involving 250 attendees. Until 
recently, most of the work focused сой 
cidentally on New York State and particu- 
larly Auica, but the committee is now 
engaged, with the Playboy Foundation's 
help. in preparing and assisti igation, 
slative rele and community efforts 
throughout the nation. 

Herman Schwartz, Director 

A.C.L.U. Prison Project 

Buffalo, New York 

Herman Schwartz, a professor of law 

at the University of New York at Buffa- 
lo, was one of the first outsiders to make 
contact with the rebellious prisoners at 
Attica. Schwartz obtained an injunction 
prohibiting officials from taking repris- 
als and got a court order to let lawyers, 
doctors and nurses in after the successful 
storming of the prison. When oficials 
defied that order, Schwartz produced 
testimony on the beating of inmates, 
which finally led to lawyers being admit- 
ted to Attica. 


the 


INVOLUNTARY MENTAL TREATMENT 

We are a group of psych 
dents in Syracuse, New York, We һе 
that institutional psychiatry is often an 
oppressive system whose dubious social 
function is to confine people whose be- 
vior society cannot tolerate. Since this 
function is exercised under the guise 


of treatment for socalled mental illness, 
it usually goes unchalle 


ged. In addi- 
tion, the psychiatric establishment often 
resists reforms designed to minimize 


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Music. Her latest 
smash hit! (Ode) 


209238. Santana 3. 
Batuka, Everybodys 
Everything, plus 7 
more. (Columbia) 


210237. Sly & The 
Family Stone — 
There's А Riot Gein’ 
оп. (Epic) 


105771. George Jones 
& Татту Wynette — 
We Со Together. 

It's so Sweet To 
Take Me, elc. (Epic) 


211094. Arthur Fiedler. 
"Superstar", Boston. 
Pops perlorm Jesus. 
Christ Superstar, 
others. (Polydor) 


210260. Percy Faith 

plays selections trom 
Jesus Christ Super- 

star. (Columb; 


213538, Paul Simon; 
His first solo albumî 
Me and Julio Down 
Ву The Schoolyard, 
etc. (Columbia) 


212845. Carly Simon 
Anticipation. The 

Girl You Think Yeu 

See, etc. (Elektra) 


214064. New Seekers. 

We'd Like To Teach 
The World To Sing. 
eic. (Elektra) 


213629. Judy Collins. 
= Living. Also: 4 
Strong Winds, nine 
more, (Elektra) 


Center. (Columbia) 


207883. Partridge 
Family Sound Maga- 
zine. 4 Woke Up in 

Love This Morning, 
1D more. (ВеП) 


171504. Switched-On 
Bach. Electronic per- 
fotmances of Bach. 
(Columbia) 


205377. Tom Jones — 
She's A Lady. Also: 
Puppet Мап, 9 more. 
(Parrot) 


209387. 5th Dimension 
— Reflections. Als 
Carpet Man, § то 
big hits, (Bell) 


208934. Horowitz 
Polo- 

naise Fantaisie, 

5 more (Columbia) 


209940. Luincy Jones 

—Smackwater lack. 

Also: Hikky-Burr. 
inside, elc. (АВМ) 


210781. Led Zeppelin. 
Their latest includes. 
Rock Апа Roll, Black 
Dogs, etc. (Atlantic) 


211284. Vikki Сат — 
Superstar. How Can 
You Neng А Broken 
Heart? (Columbia) 


212480. Roberta 
Flack — Quiet Fire. 
Also: Bridge Over. 
Troubled Waters, 
7 more. (Atlantic) 


Peter Nero 
Sunner of 'L2 


212159. Peter Nero. 
‘Summer 01 '42. 
For All We Know, 
thers. (Columbia) 


203919. carpenters — 
For All We Krovi, 
Rainy Days And Mon- 
ays, etc. (АЕМ) 


207571. Ray Соп 
— Great Contemporary 
Instrumental Hits. 
Ws Too Late, ten 
more. (Columbia) 


210229. 3 Oog Night. 
Harmony, Family 

Of Мап, many more, 

(Ountili/ABC) 


207522. Barbra Joan. 
‘Streisand. Where You 
Lead, Beautiful. 8 
more. (Columbia) 


209932. Lynn Ander- 
son — How Can 1 
Unlove You? 11 big 
hits. (Columbia) 


LEONARD 
SERNSTAN'S 


212535. Leonard 
Bernstein's Mass. 

Definitive recording 
(@record set counts 
as one — Columbia) 


208868. Johnry Cash 
Collection — Great 
Hits 01-2 A Boy 
Named Sue, Folsom 
Prison. (Columbia) 


209536. Engelbert 
Humperdinck — An- 
other Time. Another 
Place. (Parrot) 


209973. Cat Stevens. 
Teaser and The Fire 
Cat, Moonshadow, 

9 more. (A&M) 


210112. Mantovani — 
To Lovers Every- 
where. (London) 


210781. Aretha Frank- 
lin's Greatest Hits. 
Spanish Harlem, Re- 
spect, etc. (Atlantic) 


... and we also 
include a set of 


STEREO 
HEADPHONES 


at no extra cost! 


Best way to enjoy stereo sound. 
dust put en these comfortable 
Toam-padded headphores — and 
listen in complete privacy! 


س 


COLUMBIA RECORD CLUB. 
| тепе Haute, Indiana 47608 


bie S108 cach, plur precessing and postage for the 
System and records). And as an extra bonus, also send 
me the Stereo Headphones! (Complete satisfaction ie 
Guaranteed or my money will be refunded in full.) 


As a menber, 1 agree to buy 12 more records (at regu- 
lar Club prices) іп the coming two years, and may са 
cel mv membership any time thereafter. If 1 continue, 
‘wil be eligible for your bonus pian. АП selections will be 
Seseribed in adrance im the Club magazine. sent every 
four weeks. I1 I do not want any selection, ГИ return 
the response card by the date specified — Or use it 10 
Order any record 1 do want. If 1 want only the regu- 
lar selection. J need do nothing — it will be sent nuto- 
matically. From ume to time, TI be offered special 
Fecords which I may accept or reject by Using the 
ated form provided. 
| MY MAIN MUSICAL INTEREST 19 (check one bor oniy) 
D Easy Listening С) Young Sounds) Country 
D Broadway & Hollywood D Jaz 


O Classieal 


"nita (ast патеў 


J State zin 

| ATTENTION CREDIT CARO HOLDER 
Т you wish to charge the cost of the System and first 
three” records. plus processing and, postage, 10 your 
redit. сага check one nha fi) in account mimber 

[| D BankAmerieard 2 Diners Club (7 American Express 


[ttd Der сын O Midwest Bank Cr 
Weston Mace Expiratim Dat ч 
@х-2)сїв 

1 sionature. ees LZ) LD 


69 


PLAYBOY 


70 


sts’ unfettered, extralegal power 
ienis. 

Despite ou alled 
upon during part of our training pro- 
gram as psychiatric residents to act in a 
coercive manner against patients. In pr 
ciple, we oppose the involuntary 
tion on patients of mental hospi 
psychotherapy, medication, electroshock 


beliefs, we are 


and lobotomy. We oppose these acts be- 
cause we oppose treating patients as less 
n beings. 

difficulties are rarely simple. 
We are convinced that involuntary psy- 
chiatric intervention, however uncompli- 


cated. is never a satistactory et 
Those situations that appear to 

defy resolution are better settled in the 

established adversiry system of the l 


(Signed by 11 psychiatric 
Syracuse, New Yor! 


idents) 


METRIC MENACE 
The December 1971 Playboy 4 


states, in answer to a readers qu 
about the metric system. “Youll be 
pleased to know that the metric system 


Ш be simplicity itself, if and when the 
country adopts it.” 1 would like to go on 
record as being utterly opposed. to such 
a change, 

Do You realize what a change in our 
very excellent system of weights and 
sures would mean? Each and every 
pon, missile. missile station. subn 
rine, ship. earhewarningsvstem sti 
radar st shipy y yard, 
t plant, electronics company, automo- 
bile and home appliance would become 
obsolete. We would have to retool, renew. 
replace amd restock these materials, ma 
chines, etc. Our emire industrial plant, 
which is the best in the world, would be 
I into a state of complete absoles- 
cence, Also, the nation’s engineers, me- 
chanics and factory workers would be in 
а sate of complete confusion. At the 
posible outbreak of an international 
coni » would be 


fore 


s 


organized mes. Furthermore. it is the 
opin re may he 
these п to see it 


mia 
system is not 
so much а question of if as when. It 
will not. of course, be accomplished in 
one fell swoop but will be a gradual 
change over an extended period of time. 
Sticking to the English system of weights 
and measures, when most of the world 


Changing to the metric 


has gone metric, places the United 
States al an enormous disadvantage 


when it comes to selling overseas, and 
has contributed materially both to our 
lag in exports and to the subsequent rise 
in unemployment in the U.S. H's true 
that, over a period of time, we will 
have to change our entire industrial 
plant—but that is a continuing process 
anyway. In short, sticking to our present 


system actually helps reduce the U 
export pouer—U. S. machinery and spare 
parts are often incompatible with ma- 
chinery purchased. elsewhere—and will 
eventually contribute to the eclipse of the 
U.S. as the world’s leading. industrial 
nation. 
Whose side are you on, anyway? 


HOW TO HANDLE A WOWSER 

g about Charles М. К 
jhless announcement that 
Rockford. Springheld and 
other Ilinois cities there are theaters 
that show movies of men and women 
wing sexual intercourse” (The Playboy 
Forum, January), I saw a column in 
the Chicago Daily News by Mike Royko 
about a 


icago th was pres- 
only family movies, 
the policy change 
financ disaster. Though 0 
ater cut the ticket price in hall, only 
half as many people showed up. Rovko 
went on to relate а funny story about 
old enemy of rravmow, Father Fr 

N. Lawlor, who is an org 


sured o showi 


izer of 


ow 


It reminds me of the first time I 
met Father Lawlor, This was before 
he became an alderman 
self-appointed custodian of public 
moral 

He trudged into my office one 
tilted to one side from the weight of 
bulging shopp 
Ii was full of 


4 wa 


perback books, 
on my desk. 
ked. 


Have you” 
"but they are filthy. 
to do about 


This,” 1 said. stuff 
nto his shopping bag 
him the door. 


them back 
1 showing 


John Durkin 
Chicago. Illinois 


PLAYBOY DEFENDED 

My husband and I are heartily in favor 
of what PLAYBOY is doing to change with 
the times, For every Jack R. Ellison (The 
Playboy Forum, November 1971) who gets 
upset about what he thinks is vulg 
there 


times in which we live. 
Mrs. James Р. Hess 
rth Olmsted, Ohio 


Jack R. Ellison accuses you of cheapen 
grad 


therto fine m with wha 


zine’ 


he calls “latrine words and crotch shots. 
Excuse my vulgarity, but what the hell 
is a latrine word? The worst language I've 
ever heard was uttered in plush’ office 


suites. As for crotch shots, every human 
being Гус seen has a аокһ—1 won- 
der what kind of people Ellison sees 


The lever ends with t Ccusation thar 


AYROY's editors wi 


in ivory tower. 
Seems to me that’s just where ЕШ 
and belongs. 


an is — 


Arthur L. Douglas 
San Jose, California 


Im writing from the Aw n water 
ski team’s base at Italy 
where Гус just had an opportunity to 
read that Jack R. Ellison, his 16-year-old 
and many of his fr nd ac 

nees find rravmov increasingly 
| be quite happy to trade 
a subscription to the Anshalian 
Women's Weekly in which he will cer 
tainly find no obscenity or glimpses of 


son els 


pubic hair. Beuer still. if Jack cares to 
live in Australia. where sick and prudish 
censorship tries to cover the genitalia 
on of Michelangelo's Ma 

w ic fig leaf, he should 
sufficient protection for himself 
Master Ellison 


SEX IN PUBLIC 

Both Robert Wicker (The 
Forum, January) and Нату 
(The Playboy Forum, August 
seem to think that society is irrational in 
not condoning public sex. Would Wick 
er and Celine be ready—imellectually 
and emotionally—to allow their mothers 


Playboy 
Celine 
1971) 


or sisters to have sex publicly? Is it 
irrational to think that sex is beautiful 
and should be private? If public sex 
becomes the thing to do. it will be 
because society has started 10 behave not 
ationally but irrationally. Of course. if 
that happens. no one will care. 

Joe Drozck 

Boston. Massachusetts 


HOME SEX DEMONSTRATIONS 

In the January Playboy Forum. a let: 
ter hom Michele F. Rinehart stated thar 
childien who ate exposed до sexual. ex- 


pression in the home аге less likely ıo 
grow up with psychological problems 
those who are taught that sex is 
and taboo. In my opinion. this 
type of thinking shows а lack of cliss. 
Since when hits good таме gone out of 
style? Children don’t have 10 be exposed 
to the actual act to learn а healthy 
nde toward sex. I feel it’s important 
10 teach them that some things—although 
a beautiful part of lile—are private. 

Mrs. D. Kram 
San Je ilornia 


OLDER WOMEN 

I support Eileen Schafiners comen- 
tion that older women make good sexual 
objects (The Playboy Forum. December 
1971). There's а widespread myth thar 
as a guy gets older, he tends to be 
sexually turned on by younger women 
ішу isn't the сазе with me. 


but uli 
Lm nearing 50 now and 1 find that my 


1 cer 


ы b m 
Some things 
aman decides 
for himself. 


if \ 
SE [ If you thiak Bud: 
i 
| a 1 جد‎ i ї is sort of special, 
э» į | T | that’s all the more reason 
ag art і to make it 
= к, your regular beer. 
NL Bet ад. i \ (Think about it) 


` à 
AN 
MSN 


ANHEUSER-BUSCH, INC. • ST. LOUIS. 


When you say Budweiser, you've said it all! X 


PLAYBOY 


72 


ndards for a sexual object have be- 
oe complex amd sophisticated. 
Used to be, any pretty gil in her late 
teens or early 205 would attract me, 
I now find such females somewhat un 
teresting. Though they may be well de- 
veloped physically, they lack a certain 
ripeness of face and body that I desire, 
Рен the widespread American 
tendency to glorify the 20- 
as the sexual object 
«са of. puritanism. In 
20-year-old woman is a permissible abject 
far sexual feelings but as she grows older 
she also supposedly becomes more respect- 


come n 


but 


New York, New York 


HANG-UPS OF THE PSEUDO-FREE 
The suy who complained that 
reality of kue-night prowling at 
bars doesnt live up to his expec 
(The Playboy Forum, December 
obviously ha 


the 


1971) 
some pretty distorted ex- 
pectations. He sounds like a selfstyled 


sud laboring under the delusion that 
his mere appearance in such а bar should 
be sufficient to induce 
chick 10 offer to "share 
moment of life... no st 

‘That's not the way it works. The fact 
is my lriends who frequent New York's 

t Side singles bars have never gone to 
they met the same 
їн. They see the bar as a place that 
provides an opportunity 10 meet people, 


ngs attached," 


not necessarily an opportunity to get 
laid. If they meet someone interesting, 
then they will encourage the relation- 


ship in much the 
1 met anywhere else: ev 
may end up i 


aner as if they 
ly, they 
bed, but that depends on 


many variables. 
Н the anonymous New York pub 
crawler really thinks that the singles 


bars are a cop-out on the sexual revolu- 
tion, he simply doesn't understand. their 
ethos. Nor does he understand the sex- 
ual revolution, the purpose of which 
not 10 € 


courage impersonal, orgiastic, 
firstnamevonly sex but simply to de 
stroy the repressive hang-ups that might 
inhibit the enjoyment of sex as part of a 
relationship that is valued for other rea- 
sons as well. 


John Costello 
New York, New Y 


VIRGIN LIBERATION 

‘The brief critique writen by Theo 
dore Menill (The Playboy Forum, No 
vember 1971) dearly illustrates the need 
for the American Virgin Liberation Front. 
We are not adver 


there a 
always will be—depress 
be for some. 

Merrill says that be 
many oppressed people 


as this may 


ise there are so 
this country, 


“the idea that virgins need liberation 
жеп» а bit absurd.” The existence of 
other kinds of oppression docs not. ex- 
case or expunge the wrongs this organi 
ion is protesting. Virgins are available 
s human beings. They wish to partici 
pite. They offer a quality that has be- 
come all too rare in these dew than 
innocent times. "They should not feel 
forced 10 join the crowd or 10 give in 

ply because it seems the thing to do. 
Sexual freedom must include the vight 
to say no. 

We of the American Vigin Liber 
tion Front have encountered resistance 
s well as humor and ribbing. We єх- 
pect this, АШ we ask of people such as 
Merrill is that they find out what we 
re about before they put us down. 
We're not against se. Аз а matter of 
fact. some of our best members are non 
virgins. 


Wendy Robin, President 
American Virgin Liberation Front 
New York, New York 


NORMALITY AND NYMPHOMANIA 
Sieve Broday mary. Playboy 
Forum ma ement, “The 


few we as horny as 
men are My diction- 
ry de as “а wom- 
n with uncontrollable sexu: 


Many physi 
hat ny 
achieve 


ns and. psychi 


sex drive, we both realize that m 
greater than his, We usually ma 
once or twice а day, not 

menstrual periods, Then, some 
husband manipulates me, or else 1m 
ulate myself. one to fo 
Du 
" 


ver reach fewer than three org 
amd. оп one memorable occasion, 1 had 
17 orgasms in onc 19 of which 
occured during a single hour, My hus- 
band takes pleasure in keeping count, 
and I assure you he satisfies me. We are 
very uninhibited and practice a 
oral sex, as well as a wide vai 
positions, and I have no desire to seek 
ош any other sex parne 

In scven years of m 
good care of my husba 
and a home. 1 write, 
my own clothes and many for my family 
and friends, read from ten to 20 books а 
month and bowl twice a week. My hus- 
band and I go out frequently and enter 
n often. So 1 don’t exacily lie in bed 
y uncontrollable desires. 
I am nor ige—no 
. really—but 1 do know other 

like myself, Sex drive v 
леу in people. regardless of gender, 
and is determined by upbringi well 
as by inherent traits. 1 was lucky enough 
to be able to throw off my inhibitions, 
forget what Fd been taught about what 


day 


nd. two ch 
nt, draw, sew all 


ver 


one 


women ries 


women are supposed to feel abo 
their bodies and enjoy be 
Brodaty 
he'd understand and enjoy wo 


more. 
(Name withheld by request; 

Antioch. Calilorn 
wwer do Steve Brady's state 
ment, “The few women 1 know who are 
s horny as men are nymphomaniacs." 


Fd Jike to pe i, except in the 
case ol a psychiatrie disturbance, nympho 

is merely the en by om 
al, double-stan 
thy woman whose sexu 


nonse 
a normal, 1 
ty is not repressed by the usual cultural 


inhibitions. Her sexuality thus resem- 
bles, but is not identical with. the males 
in quantity. drive and 
partners. In other words. it is 
Broday were saving that the only people 
he knows who seven feet tall are 
those who are seven feet tall. 

Муга А. Josephs, Ph.D. 

New York, New York 


мегем 


are 


I wholeheartedly believe Steve. Broday 
when he writes that he knows few he 
ome: 


Dick Biishois 
Danvers, Massachusetts 


People like Steve Broday should ask 
questions of The Playboy Advisor, not 
make statements to The Playboy Forum. 

Charlone Е. Luckstone 
Forest Hills, New York 


A POUND OF FLESH 
ws Decko, former director of pub- 
ion for the city of Sheboy 
arged in September 


statute 
that provides cri s for any- 
one who “openl and aso- 

tes with a person he knows is not his 


spouse under circumstances that imply 
sexual intercourse. 

As a result of this charge, Decko was 
relieved of his duties and left Sheboy 
n. He traveled to California where. 
lhough he held bachelors degrec 
education from the College of Idal 
nd 


masters di recreation from 


Washingte 
able to obt ment in his held. 
On several occasions, his imervicws led 


him to be one of the top two or three 
contenders for the positions available 
but the final test, which apparently 
cluded a phone call to Sheboygan, 
ys resulted in his being eliminated 


He then went to the Toledo, Ohio, 
area where he sought several simi 
positions, all with ihe 

Decko held several menial jobs while 


10 secure employment coi 
h his education and expe- 
Finally, obviously depressed. by 

(continued on page 189) 


Benson & Ни 


Generals Deter 
Regular & Menthol: 21 mg. "ter 1d mg nicata Cigarette Smoting Is Dangerous to Your Health 
av. per cigarette, FIC Report, Aug. 71. 


PLAYBOY 


RCA XL-100 


„Its more than Its100% Solid State 
just great color. AccuColor 


‘i 


XL-100 is color TV with RCA's best color ever. Backed by the best 
circuitry designed to perform Every XL-100 console warranty program ever. 
longer with fewer repairs. and table model = We have such confidence in the relia- 


has RCA's black 
matrix picture tube 
for the brightest, 
sharpest color in 


bility of XL-100, we back it for a full year 
on both parts and labor with our ""Риг- 
chaser Satisfaction” warranty—"PS" for 
short. (See basic provisions below.) 


There's not one chassis 
tube to burn out. We've 
replaced all tubes with 10096 


solid state components—the BEA EY Widest choice. 
most reliable components The tuning’s a snap. With over forty XL-100 models to 
used intelevisiontoday.Twelve  XL-100's advanced tuning system юса. Бей San TE TOC thats 
> exclusive plug-in AccuCircuit таке color tuning virtually foolproof! fight for your budget. Your НСА dealer 
modules control most set functions, so your It features AccuMatic, RCA's color aniei уой покере why UL 100 [$+- 
service lechnician can make most repairs monitor that automatically locks color i 
quickly and easily, in the home. within a normal range more than just great color. 


ТУХ) Here are the basic provisions of our Xt-100 "Purchaser Satisfaction" warranty (РЗ for shor: it any- 
[UE] thing goes wrong with your new set within a year from the day you buy it and i's cur fault, we'll pay your 
I) repair bili--both paris and complete labor. You can use any service shop in which you have confidence— 
You don't have tc pick from a special authorized list. If your set is a portable, you take it in for service. For larger 
з, your Serviceman will come to your home. Just present your warranty registialion card and RCA pays his 
repair bill. If your picture tube becomes defective during the first two years we will exchange it for a rebuilt tube. 
(Ме pay lor installation, during the first yeer—you pay for it in the second year.) In short, the warrenty covers 
every set defect. It doesn't cover installation, foreign use, antenna systems or adjustment of customer controls. 


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© 


moris SACK NICHOLSON 


a candid conversation with the funky star of ‘five easy pieces” and “carnal knowledge” 


Nothing warmer 


Hollywood's gloomy faces than a ve 


brings a glow to 
al 
of the overnight success. story—the ре 
former who was unknown one day and а 
star the next—that was so common dur- 
ing the film capital's halcyon days. In 
the case of Jack Nicholson, the over- 
night success story look 11 yeurs to write. 
After a long apprenticeship—mostly as a 
heavy—in a plethora of low-budgeted B 
movies, Nicholson finally scored with 
his Junky, funny portrayal of George 
Hanson, the [oothall-helmeted, alcoholic 
A. C. L. U. lawyer in "Easy Rider," which 
brought him instant recognition and an 
Academy Award nomination. The criti- 
cal praise he's received for subsequent 
performances us the restless, predatory, 
self destructive antiheroes of “Five Easy 
Pieces" and “Carnal Knowledge” has firm- 
ly established this balding, sleepy-cyed 
native of Neptune, New Jersey, as an im- 
probable but curiously contemporary star. 

The product of an unhappy marriage 
between a beautician and a window 
decorator that ended shortly after his 
birth, Nicholson gained his first dramatic 
experience in a Neptune grammar 
school variety show when he lipsynced 
to a Frank Sinatra record. Starstruck 
from a steady diet of drive-in movies, he 
headed West in 1954 soon after gradua- 
tion from high schoot and supported 
himself by working in a Los Angeles tay 
store and hustling in pool halls. At 1$, 


“The censors say they're protecting the 
family unit in Ainevica when, in fact, the 
reality of the censorship is if you suck 
a lil, you've an N, but if you cut it off 


with a sword, you're а GP." 


he landed an office boy's job in the ani- 
mation department al Metro-Golduyn- 
Mayer, where he helped augment his 
meager income by running a betting pool. 

To get his first professional acting 
job, Nicholson resorted to a ploy worthy 
of Dale Carnegie—addressing all the exec- 
utives he encountered at MGM by their 
fast names. Que of them finally set up 
a screen test and arranged. for him to 
study at a local theater. Early. parts in 
such TV shows as “Matinee Theater" and 
“Divorce Court". enabled Nicholson 10 
move out of the apartment he was shar 
ing with a friend and—m 1962—inio an- 
other one with Sandra Knight, an aspiring 
actress. T heir marriage, which produced a 
daughter, Jennifer, ended in 1969. 

For most of the Sixties, ng oul- 
side the major studios, Nicholson played 
leads in a string of leather-jacketed biker 
movies. horror epics, Westerns and 
psycho films with such provocative tilles 
as “The Terror" “Back Door to Hell.” 


“Too Young 10 Love,” “Little Shop 
of Horrors." “The Gry Baby Killer" 
and “Hell's Angels on Wheels? He 


also wrote several of these exploitation 
fins, including “The Trip.’ a doper 
starving Peter Fonda, and “Head,” the 
sole motion-picture venture of the Mon- 
kees rack group. Then, in 1969, when 
dropped ош of 
promised to be just another bike тох 


another actor what 


—but turned out to be the Seventies’ 


“I was one of the first people in the 
county to take acid; it was in laboratory 
experiments on the West Coast about 
nine or len years ago. At that time, 1 
was a totally adventurous actor.” 


countercullure’s gripping answer to Jack 
Kerouac's “On the Road” —Nicholson was 
lapped as a last-minute replacement for 
a featured role in "Easy Ride 

From thal point on. his career was off 
and rewing. After surviving a major 
blowout with only minor cuts aud bruises 
—an embarrassing outing in the big- 
budgeted Barbra. Streisand. musical “On 
a Clear Day You Can See Forever" 
—he went on to win his Oscar nomina- 
lion as a failed piano prodigy turned 
drifter in “Five Easy Pieces.” His direc- 
torial debut. in “Drive, He Said," the 
story (which he cascripted) of a cam- 
pus activist slowly going insane, drew 
mixed veactons; but with the Mike 
Nichols-divceted “Carnal Knowledge," a 
study of the obsessive sexual 
adventures of two friends, chronicled 
from college days through middle age. 
he reached what many consider to be 
the zenith of his craft. 

Iccording to friends who know hin 
well, Nicholson is as complex а man off- 


searing 


camera as Jonathan in “Carnal Know 
edge,” or any of the other characters he 
has delineated on the sereen. To explore 
these complexities. PLAYtOY Contributing 
Editor Richard Warren Lewis visited 
the actor in his home at the top of Mul- 
holland Drive, werlooking Los Angeles. 
Lewis reports 

“When 1 arrived at the bim 
stucco house, Nicholson was preparing 


Isro-story 


“Tve had days in my life, or three or 
four days at a lime, or 
been with mare than fon a 


eks, when Гое 


»men.1 found 
that to be an internal lie. You're just not 
really getting it on past a certain point." 


75 


PLAYBOY 


76 


10 leave for ten weeks on location in 
Atlantic City, where his latest picture, 
"The King of Marvin Gardens? was being 
filmed. With he 
placed а number of LPs in corrugated 
shipping boxes: George Harrison's “All 
Things Must Pass? Strauss 
corded by Fritz Reiner and the Chicago 
Symphony. ‘Rimsky-Korsakov's Greatest 
Hits’ and a representative selection of Bob 
Dylan, Cat Stevens and Lec Michaels. 
Nicholson wore brown-and-while saddle 
shoes, pleated slacks and a Shetland pull- 
over—an outfit he could have worn in 
the carly sequences of ‘Carnal Knowledge. 

“Among the fast things one notices 
about him. besides a vaguely rural voice 
that sounds as if he'd spent a childhood 
of Saturday matinees watching Henry 
Fonda movies, is the expanse of white 
enamel gleaming from his foolavide 
avin: perfectly straight teeth untouched 
by caps or orthodontia. His creased fore- 
head. and receding hairline make him 
look. considerably older than someone 
on the precipice of his 35th birthday. 

“White Nicholson excused himself to 
field the first of many phone calls that 
would punctuate our conversation, а 
glance al his cluttered library. shelves 
revealed an eclectic selection of books: 
‘The Complete Works of Marcel Du 
champ, ‘Edgar Cayce on Reincarnation! 
Jules Feiller's “Harry, the Rat with Wom- 
en! "The Primal Scream? "The Groupsex 
Tapes! and several works of Hermann 
Hesse. Standing amid these volumes were 
wo large candles, one spelling out the 
word rrAace and the other sculpted in 
the form of a prodigious, erect penis. 
Returning, Nicholson led the way 
into a beamedceiling living room and 
cased his 510" frame 
suede couch opposite a fireplace crack- 
ling with pine logs. Feet. propped on a 
coffee table, he lit a fat Monte Cristo 
Havana and idly stroked the cat nestling 
next to him. Nicholson's eyes, somehow, 
were as inserulable as the cat's. Visible 
aver his shoulder was a baby grand 
piano and beyond that an expansive 
sieimmin, rimmed by 
decking, and beyond that an incompa- 
rable mountain vieu—crenture. comforts 
that had become available to Nicholson 
only in the three years since he became 
ап honest-to-God celebrity, They 
gested an appropriate point of depariure 
Jor our conversation." 


great deliberation, 


waltzes: re- 


slender, то a 


poot redwood 


sug- 


PLAYBOY: Have there been any significant 


ny 


changes im your life style in the three 
it big with Easy Rides? 
for 


years since you hi 
NICHOLSON: Well, I'm not looking 
work anymore. Work is looking for 
That changes every minute of your 
—your entire outlook on life, B 
Easy Rider, 1 been almost totally 

vn, despite the fact tl 


iten six movies, coproduced three. 
сї o nicdited five and acted 
20. For onc thing, since my oven 
dom. if you can call it that, I ca 
around. picking up stray pussy anymore. 
«c the anonymity of a p 
in a bar. If you just 
come up say. how're vou 
doing?" everyone notices: it all becomes 
very public. And there was a time, soon 
after Easy Rider, when I was rude to 
friends—didi't return. phone calls as 
promptly as 1 should. I never used to be 
te at all; suddenly, 1 was Lue every- 
where. After three years, Tm just now 
starting to be on time a lite bit. But 
the most encow 
de h 
own judgment of my 
that I'm very happy with the way th 
I've responded. It's been good for me, 
and it’s getting better all the time. 
PLAYBOY: Has your standard of living 
changed appreciably? 
NICHOLSON: As far as the tangibles are 
concerned, until recently I still drove 
the same 1967 VW I had for five years. I 
gave it up when 2 started to feel it 
night be an affectation of some kind. 
My new саг is a Mercedes-Benz. 600, for 
driving my friends around at night. My 
house is 20 percent bigger 0 
І was living in before, and I'm 
process of buying it instead of renting 
it. Jr's not a really expensive house by 
contemporary standards. The one rea 
decadent habit I've picked up is spei 
ag a great deal of money in restaurants. 
With anywhere from four to six people. 
every lunch is 515: most dinners are S25. 
I probably average 530 a day on food. 
I'm grateful to be able to pick up the 
majority of the checks. ‘cause I'm work- 
ing and а lot of my friends aren't. Wh 
they're working and I'm not, they pick 
up the checks. Probably one of my big- 
gest selfindulyences is a Monte Cristo 
number two. the Cuban cigar that 1 buy 


assist 


ging thing is, really, 


how | s ch cle My 


aged 


n the 


ne 


for $25 a box in Europe or Canada 
where they can still be legally obtained. 


There's nothing like this ci Tve been 
through the sophistry of all 
the other ones, but basically, when you 
get right down to Monte Cristo's 
it—hoom. over and o One of thc 
eat injustices of Western. diplomacy is 
nonrelationship with Castro. Never 
mind China: give me Cuba back so [ 
can get my cigars, D got into smo 
them in Canada when we were shool 
Carnal Knowledge. We had all taken a 
vow 10 мау oll grass while we were 
aking this ie, so the Monte Cristos 
became a perfect substitute. 
PLAYBOY: Why was the vow ni 
first place? 

NICHOLSON: Mike Nichols fell, properly, 
that grass slows your tempo down 
little bit. Without it, he felt that there 


міна 


ош 


vi 


ade in the 


would be more 


ality. more ability to 
1 with the juvenile factor—especially 
sequences. For the 
most part, everyone stuck to it, despite 
some ui ms. In Санай 
they smoke it in public bars. They have 
an enormous heroin problem in Vancou 
ver. A tremendous amount of. Canada 
n ic is through. that city, so they 
low grass in certain sections. There's no 
bust. no nothin’. The clubs | visited 
were just great and groovy because of 
this, even though I wasn't smoking. Every- 
опе was happy and pleasant. 
PLAYBOY: You once told а 
had smoked grass every day lor 15 yews 
Is that true? 
NICHOLSON: To ce. Fifteen 
wears ago is about when E started smok 
ing. Im a social smoker. But I cin go 
for months ar а time without even 
thinking about it. 
PLAYBOY: How do you feel about the 
marijuana laws? 
NICHOLSON: It’s insane to have laws that 
making criminals out of a huge 
percentage of our population. particu- 
larly when it’s something that involves 
Fm old-fashioned in that | 
t want to see the entire world 
dicted to drugs—like the synthetic € 
described in Brave New World 
Ын | think it's an enormous leap 
from a Tittle grass to that grim picture. 


reporter. you 


се 


moralit 


dot 


ence 


eral Bur 
mos misleading kind of è 
I've got опе of their pamphlets in my 
bookcase: it propounds such garba З 
"Beware, young and old people in all 
walks of life. This [join] may be handed. 
you by the friendly stranger. It contains 
the killer drug. mariju 
narcotic in which lurks murd 
death.” I dowi think the 
prove that т: 
harder drugs. 
Ithough probably І never would 
ve encountered any other drug if I 
hadn't gotten involved in smoking mari- 
. But Pm not addicted to any of it. 
now when to say, "No more of this 
PLAYBOY: Isn't cocaine the currently fashi- 
ionable drug in Hollywood? 

NICHOLSON: I see it around. 

PLAYBOY: Have you wied it? 

NICHOLSON: Ү ically an upper, 
but 


. it's ba 


to do too much to 
me. 1 Il be fashionable for 
long. be: d we're in 
a depression: whether the world chooses 
to call it а depression or not, there's no 
money around. Cocaine is "in" now be- 
use chicks dig it sexually. Its the 
powder that they talk about in 
Porgy and Bess: “Don't lei him handle me 
nd drive me wild.” The property of the 


drug is that, while it numbs some arcas 


ке it's expensive 


5 


a choice 


PLAYBOY 


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it inflames the mucous membranes such 
ladys genital region. 
That's the real attraction of it, In his 
book. My Wicked, Wicked Ways, Errol 
Flynn talks about putting а little. co 
caine on the tip ol your dick as an 
aphrodisiac. But his conclusion. is that 
there really isn't апу such thing as an 
арһго ve with hi 
though if you do put a numbing tip ol 
the end ol your cock because 


as those in а 


I sort of 


cocaine o 
you're quick on the trig 
cut down on the sensation, [ guess it 
could be considered а sexual aid. Aud it's 
am upper, so vou've got added energy. 

PLAYBOY: Five or six years ago, the popu- 
lar sexual upper was amyl nitrite. Have 
you had any experiences with thin drug 
NICHOLSON: Ive never taken апу pop- 
pers: Fm afraid of them. Whenever I 
sty thar to friends of mine, they look at 
me like D must be insane ic 
les a flasher. It 
ups the respiratory system to а tremen 
dous degree what 1 understand, 
and makes the heart pound. 1 just de 
like fast rushes. l've had more than 
dozen opportu ahold of 
amyl nitrite and 1 notice I haven't done it 
so something's resisting it. Many people 
don't know what the hell theyre doing 
when they take something into their 
system, if you want to know the truth. 1 
really know very litle about. drugs ex 
cept how they individually alle me. 
Tm attuned to that because of my train 


er and need to 


big in the sexual ares. 


from 


ities to get 


n actor: 10 know how 1 feel and 
why I feel and where the deelin: 
emanating from. In that regard, Ive had 
а lot ol experiences with acid 

PLAYBOY: When did you first try it? 
NICHOLSON: J was опе ol the first people 
in the country to take acid; iL was in 
laboratory West 
Coast about nine or ten years ago. At 
totally 


are 


experiments on the 


that time, 1 was a chenturous 
tor look 
his mental 
butions to art. 1 was very curious about 
LSD. Some of the people 1 knew were 
therapy with it. I went 
L. A. and took it one alternoon, 1 spent 
five hours with à therapist and about 
five more at home in the later st 
it. 1 hallucinated а lot, primarily. be- 
cause of the way the therapist structured 
He put a blindfold on 
makes you much more introspective, 
ves you more dreamlike imagery. 1m. 
ne What acid is like when you know 
nothing about it, You think it’s going to 
be like денй ht 
had done. But all of your conceptual 
cality gets jerked away and there arc 
that 


for experience ло put. in 


cabinet lor [ater contri 


to downtown 


s stoned on grass, wh 


ngs i mind have in no 


your 


been suggested to you: such a 


you're going to see God; or watch sap 


g through the leaves of tees: or 


sucamin 


you're going to feel the disolving of 
certain bodily parts; you're going to 
reexperience your own birth, which I 
did on my first acid wip; you're going 
to be frightened that your prick might 
be cut off, because you have castration 
fears: you're going to come mush-ass to 
face with your own homosexual fears, 1 
just wasn’t ready for half this stull 
PLAYBOY: Cau you describe what the cà 
tration fears felt like? 

NICHOLSON: At first, 1 just didn't feel too 
d то the therapist. "1 feel a 
kind of Huttcring genital arca." It 
was sort of like a queasy stomach. At 
that level, its alarming, but it’s not ter- 
rorizing. Then | began to get more un- 
comfortable and cold in that area. M 
one point. T came back to consciousness 
ning at the top of my lungs till I 
had по more breath to exhale, 1 thought 
Га have to wy ло remedy this genital 
discomfort myself by cuni 
oll. T 
logically 
meant. and he 
sexual fears. Tt w 
paranoia. The 


hor. I si 


n my g 


screa 


my cock 


ot into interpreti 


ibat psycho 


with the therapist. what it 
I it related to homo: 
s really a kind of 
just aggravated it 
Taught me a lot about myself. It was а 
good psscholosi "ce 

PLAYBOY: What insight did you 
from experiencing your own birt 
NICHOLSON: I came away with the feeling 
that one never totally recovers from his 
own birth. It was extremely. graphic, a 
of actually being inside а womb 
in some kind of sack that was the same 


deu 


al expe 


feeli 


as me. E didn't feel the separation, be 
cause everything was the 
ture, At a certain point, something 
began to happen: 1 didn’t know what it 
was. bur still there was only me 
the universe, you see. 1 didn't even 
know that P had fingers and a 
Then suddenly 1 began feeling myself. 1 


starred moving and elt the interior of 


same tempera- 


] was 


nose. 


the vagina going by my face. And then 


came the absolutely traumatic moment 


when the cold ай of reali 


hit the top 
y head. Te totally defined me. It was 


first feeling that T was separate from 
anything. that 1 was a specific individu 
al. Then suddenly 1 was in this room and 
it was light and 1 didn't even know 
what light was. I'm telling it now as you 
tell a story, but it wasn’t a story when I 
was experiencing it, because E didn't know 
what a story was, what a word was, what 
1 was. Ht almost defies description. 

Later on. I became couscious of very 
arly emotions about not. being wanted 
feeling diat 1 was а problem 10 my 


family as an infant. You sce, my mother 


and father separated just prior to my 


binh. Knowing what I know now, it 


must 1 


ve been very hard on my mother. 
She certainly didit. need the problems 
of caving for am infant coupled with 


Loyalists 
Hans-up 


"Thats no problem? 


“Since I tasted Ballantines 
I cant drink any other Scotch” 


The more you know 
about Scotch, tbe more loyal 
you are Lo Ballantines. 


e 9 * н 
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PLAYBOY 


80 


the deterioration of the marri; 
of that must have been comm 
Realizing that made me unders 
psychological terms a certa 
rel ip that I have with the fer 
sex—one of dependence upon them, want- 
to please them because my surv 
depended on it, 

PLAYBOY: Have you dropped much acid 
since that first time? 

NICHOLSON: Some, but not as much as 
ost of the people I know. 1 still take it 
occasionally, but Ehave а certain awe of i 
PLAYBOY: What makes you persist? 
NICHOLSON: Once you've related to acid, 
there are certain things you perceive t 
would be impossible otherwise—things 
that help you understand yourself. Also, 
maybe there's the element of challenge. 
You get into it because you don't want 
to feel something is tco frightening to deal 
with. If properly used, acid can also mean 
a lot of kicks. During the shooting of Easy 
Rider in Taos, New Mexico, lor example, 
Hopper and I dropped a little of the drug 
couple of guys drove us up to D. Н. 
Lawrences tomb. Its on the side of a 
mountain and there's this g 
granite tomb where his wife is bur 
Lawrence is indoors in a kind of crypt. 
When we got ир ther just 
starting to come on. Th жаз going 
down, so that it w htly above 
сус level. Dennis and I get very зеп 
mental about e: at these 
ments; we love to cry 
k about how it’s gonna 
we were up there rapping about D. H. 
Lawrence and how beautiful it was. We 
decided we were going to sit on the 
tomb with D. H. and that was it, From 
then on, thi where we were going 
to make our nd in life, and if th 
wanted to go on with the movie, they'd 
have to come here and get us; "cause this 
was where we were was where 
we'd be. We looked es and talked 
about art and the ius and 


nsl: 


we were 


bout old 


ad t: 


asked ourselves why people couldn't be 


more open. And after a while, the guys 
in the van came back to get us- 

Later on, Dennis went off with a lady 
and I went back to the motel we were 


g in. Keep in mind that we were 
in the middle of Western country, reck- 
ing with Indian lore. So back at the 
motel, 1 spent a certain amount of time 
acting out guarding our rooms, watching 
where the Indian attack. would come 
from. Then I listened to the clectric 
buzz on the television for about 
minutes and that began to make me feel 
as if D were a bunch of wiring, I had 
this enormous energy, a need to do 
something, so I went outside and started 
walking. You're always very sensitive to 
light under acid; so when light be 


1 comers, 
g Tt was 
t does just before the 
sun comes up. 1 thought I'd better get 
somewhere where I could sec the dawn, so 
1 dimbed up to the top of a 10-foot tree. 
I was very happy up there. By now I 
had passed the peak of it. 1 was watch- 
ing this meadow—looking at the light 
coming on. The meadow seemed to have 
all these rocks, especially a big white 
rock that was one of the most beautiful 
things D had ever эссп. At i 

t. the white rock stood 


a cer 


po ight up 
suddenly turned into this fabulous white 
horse. He went up on 


once, came down stifflegged and his tail 
went und in a circle, exactly like a 
propeller, as if he were going to take off. 
Fd never seen this a horse before. 
Now I thought, “Well, maybe I'm not 
tked out on this acid, ‘cause this is far 
out.” He just went tearing around this 
meadow and throwing his neck up and 
bouncing and kicking. It was so beauti 
ful to sec. Then all the other darker 
rocks became horses and he went racing 
wth of them. The moment 
filled me with fantastic emotion. Later, T 
climbed down the tree, walked out into 
the meadow and actually followed а 
catde herd. 1 was about ready to go 
home when I looked down at my feet 
and found an inflatable plastic pork 
chop—apparently а squeaker toy for a 
dog. It was so incongruous, You can im- 
ne what that did to me. 1 carried that 
pork chop im my suit pocket. through 
most of the shooting of Easy Rider. 
PLAYBOY: Did you have any idea how big 
a picture it was going to be? 
NICHOLSON: Well. before I even saw the 
film, I knew that any motorcycle picture 
with Dennis Hopper and Peter Fonda 
in it was going to make a certain number 
of millions of dollars, because I was 
acquainted with the grossing porent 
of all of those films. Peter at that time 
had become the John Wayne of the bike 
movies; Dennis had also been in several. 
You could figure a pi | Fon 
and Hopper would gross, fairly conserva- 
tively, 53,000,000 to 1,000,000. in the 
bike market alone, because Wild Angels 
had done $6,000,000, I had also been in 
а couple of them—Psych-Out and Hell's 
Angels on Wheels—which had very good 
grosses. T felt, too, that the script for 
Easy Rider was a modu n 
terms of quality within the genre. Be- 
cause of the quality of the film. what it 
did, what it said, you could see it was 
going to reach beyond the bike market. 
PLAYBOY: How successful has it been? 
NICHOLSON: I don't know for sure. The 
last projections that 1 heard were around 
$20,000,000. 
PLAYBOY: Did you participate in the 
profits? 


around to 


ion up 


NICHOLSON: Ves, 1 did. 1 
do so before the production, but alter- 
ward, they gave me a small piece of the 
action, a percentage. This is very unor- 
ойох; you never get this in а conven- 
tional corporate structure. They also let 
me cut my own section of the film, 
which is even more unusual. That had a 
lot to do with the longtime relations 
between Dennis and myself. 

PLAYBOY: ls it uuc, as o 
reported, t 
during Easy Rider's 
NICHOLSON: Thats 
But each time T did a take or an angle 
it involved. smoking almost an entire 
joint. We were smoking regular dope 
pretty good Mexican grass from the state 
of Michoacin, Now, the main portion of 
this sequence is the transition. from not 
being stoned to being stoned, So that 
after the first take or two, the acting 
job becomes reversed, Instead of being 


interviewer 


you smoked 155 joints 


тирге sequence? 
little exaggerated. 


straight and having to act stoned at the 
end, I'm now stoned at the begi and 
have to act straight and th Ily let 


myself return to where I was—which was 
very stoned. It was ап unusual 
acting problem. And Di is hysteri- 
cal offcamera most of the time tl 
happening. In fact, some of the things 
that you sce in the filmike my look- 
ing away and trying to keep myself from 
breaking up—were caused by my look- 
ing at Dennis ollamera over in the 
bushes, totally freaked out of his bird, 
laughing bis head off while I'm in there 
tying to do my Lyndon Johnson and 
keep everything together. 

PLAYBOY: We've heard you were equally 
into the part for the scene in Five Easy 
Pieces in which you're confronted with a 


reverse 


nis wi 


sullen waitress. 
NICHOLSON: Yeah, the one where the 
waitress says, “No substitutions,” and I 


end up having to ask for a chicken-silad 
sandwich on wheat toast—hold the butter, 
leuuce, may тї chicken: salad— 
just to get an order of wheat toast, Final- 
p the table cl 


r of glasses, 


scene had occurred in my 
1 was maybe 
t way at Pupi's, 


own life. Yi 
20, I cleared a table th 
а coffee shop on the Sunset Strip. Carole 
Eastman, the screenwriter of Five Easy 


ars apo, whe 


Pieces and an old friend of mine, knew 
about that incident. And Bob Rafelson, 
the director, and 1 had gone through 
something like the bit with a "no subst 
tutions” waitress, although that time 1 
hadn't dumped the dishes. So, knowing 
me, Carole and Bob just put the two 
incidents together and into the script 
Bob and Carole are among a number 
ers and directors I've hung 
around with for years whom I consider 
gate amily. I have very fa 


of actors, w 


my sur 


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feelings about them and Charles East- 
j, the writer; Robert Towne, the ac 
tor; Monte Hellman, who most recently 
directed Two Lane Blacktop, and Roger 
Corman, who produced most of my pre 
vious films. I's like we all grew up 
together. We have a rare symbiotic rela 
tionship, in the best sense. We seem to 
tun one another on artistically. Гус 
always had а very real feeling that they 
were more talented than 1 was in most 
reas; they are all people whom I ad- 
mire, as well as friends of mine. A lor of 
what growing I've done is the result of 
experience that they've shared with me 
I know they'd say the sam 
PLAYBOY: How did ус 

together? 

NICHOLSON: Ir began by just being in 
Hollywood and starting out at the same 
time, attending acting classes and work- 
ing together in films. I met my former 


come 


г group 


wile, Sandra, in an acting class taught 
by Martin Landau. In the late Fifties 
and carly Sixties, none of us had much 


money. We used to hang out in now- 
defunct colfechouses like The Unicorn, 
Macs Luan’s, The Renaissance and 
Cher Paulette’s. And we'd meet at Bar- 
neys Beanery or we'd play darts at а bar 
called the Rain Check, both of which 
are still in nev 
drinker, bur I was one of the earl 
people in the Rain Check and I took 
them some of their heaviest drinkers. 1 
think Sally Kellerman and 1, between 
us, probably made the place. 

People in the group were writing 
plays and reading them in collechouse 
A bunch of us literally built a small 
theater, The Players Ring. where we 
legitimate produc- 
tions. We didn't have a penny. We used 
to go out and steal lumber from h 
ards at night, We stole the 
of gas stations. Lighting, boards. every- 
thing, we ripped off one way or another. 
We spent a lot of time acting. TÌ 
really ripe learning. It was a time of 
freshness and a discovery of what acting 
all about, of meeting new people and 
being inspired by other people's work, 
or watching an actor or an actress who 
could hardly talk come into a class and 
then six months kiter suddenly do а 
That was рап of the 


existence. I was 


a 


produced our own 


toilets out 


at was 


PLAYBOY: Was the theater and coffcc- 
house scene pretty much your whole lile 
then? 

NICHOLSON: No; 
generation that was raised on cool jazz 
and Jack Kerouac, and we walked around 
in corduroys and (urdenecks talking about 
Camus and Sarre and existentialism 
and what going on ihe road would 
be like, We stayed up all night and 
slept till three in the afternoon, We 


Т was also part of a 


were among the few people around seeing 
European pictures. We went to Dylan's 
and Ravi Shankar's early concerts. We 
smoked a lot of dope, usually in the 
toilet or out in the back yard or drive- 


way, ‘Cause it wasn't cool to do it in 


public. Zen was coming in, so we knew 
about Alam Watts 
been fortunate chronologically; we hadn't 
had to go to war. And we were prob- 
ably among the first group of people who 
weren't buying the American dream, We 
spent a Jot of time in the street scene on 
the Sunset Strip. This is long belore 
drug watlicking wrecked the Suip. There 
were no rock-n-roll clubs, no naked 
shows, no fuck movies; it was really cool. 

And there were a lot of parties. Мапу 


Мом of us had 


more parties than I go to now. They 


w our-own-bottle 
tics or wine parties. Harry Dean Stan- 
ton, who was one ol my close side-kicks 
in those days, says that whenever he 
thinks of me in that period, he always 
sees me with a cheap red wine on my 
red lips. We'd get 19 half gallons of 
Gallo Red Mountain and get everybody 
drunk. 1 guess you could call them orgies 
by the strictest definition. 1 gave parties 
that hundreds of people attended: there 
were а dot of rooms in my house and 
people would take their own little pri- 
te tips I don't know what they were 
g T know what 1 was doing. though, 
nd Î guess that could be called an orgy. 
But it wasn't something where every- 
body's there and naked and fucking one 
another all over the place. I've never 
been in that scene. I've tried ineffective- 
ly to promote it a time or two, because of 
thrill-secking impulses, but they never 
really came together. Гуе never been in 
an orgy of more than three people. But 
the 


and T origi 


те simply bring 


par- 


va 
di 


ties were great, Actually, Dennis 


ly became actors because 


we like parties and people 
art and acceptance and all the tl 
that are really very momentary 
immediate. 

PLAYBOY: Can you recall 


nd girls a 


and 


ny particularly 


memorable festivities that the two of 
you attended together? 
NICHOLSON: We used to go а lot to the 


salons held by Samson DeVieer, a male 
witch. He's one of the great Hollywood. 
І. A. puries, no question about that. 
PLAYBOY: Purits? 

NICHOLSON: By puries I main people who 
are very expressive of the L.A. culture 


—the overstuffed California hamburger, 
the 48,000 ice-cream flavors, the Holly- 
wood electric whiz-bang kids. Anyway, 
DeVreer had sort of a running open house 
for crazos over there, all the local 
eccentrics like Vampira and occasionally 
James Dean. People would be reading 
tarot cards at those gatherings—long be 


fore it became fashionable. Just big 


— ^ 


MÁS 


PLAYBOY 


walkingaround parties, Every once in a 
while, Samson would turn off all the lights 
and read from his memoirs, I didn't know 
y people who had been André Gide's 
<o it was very exotic to me. 

ng your- 


How were you suppor 


NICHOLSON: Unemployment checks helped. 
And I was doing pretty well betting the 
horses, On a day when I'd have four win- 
ners, I'd come away from the track with 
maybe $300 or 5400, The moment 1 quit 
was the day T tapped out in the fourth 
race and couldn't find my car in the park- 
g lot at Hollywood Park. І thought, 
Well, this is grand. Fm pissed off "cat 
Fm losing and 1 can't even find my car. 
What kind of state of mind is that to be 
in” So I just dropped out of it. 

1 guess I 


ned most of my liv from. 


TV. There was lots of television work 
around in those days. I used to do court 
shows and improvised stuff like that. 


I was a great corespondent in Divorce 
Couri. 1 gor my m, The Cry Baby 
Killer—with Roger Corman as execu 
producer—right after 1 started. 
I played a high school boy who kidn 

а woman amd a child—sort of a Des 
perate Hours situation, I got killed at 
the end. Didn't work on а 


for almost a year after that. 
ally, though, most of us from the group 
hegan getting work. One of the most 
memorable for me was Corman's Litile 


Shop of Horvors—which took little more 
than two days to shoot. The story line 
concerns a scientist who crosses a Ve- 
nus-flyvap with some gargantuan plant. 
He starts all feeding it flies and it gradu- 
ates to mice and finally to people. You 
know the 16st. 
PLAYBOY. How 
Corman? 

NICHOLSON: I did the leads in 11 horror. 
movies and kill-crazy teenage-delinquent. 
pictures for Roger. The longest shooting 
schedule he ever had was two weeks, and 
at time actors’ scale was about $350 
"That's all he ever p: уройу 
years ago. when he was shooting 
St. Valentine's Day Massacre at 
Cenuny-Fos—at a much larger 
1. "Roger, TI 


y filins did you do for 


want to do the lead. Do me a favor: 
Give me the smallest part with the long: 
the picti," Which 
r for the murderers, 
1 worked for three weeks and earned more 
Corman movie than. exer 
before. I had only onc linc. It got the 
only laugh in the picture, 1 might add. 
Someone says, "What the hell arc you 
' to another character, one of the 
who's rubbing something on his 
And I say, using a gravelly voice, 
105 garlic. The bullets don't kill ya. và 
die of the blood poisoning." That voice 


money in a 


coming out of me always got a laugh. 
But Roger's record. is 
amazing. At the time I stopped working 
with him, he'd made 70 pictures, and 
only two of them lost money. No major 
studio has ever had this kind of a 
record. 
PLAYBO! 
your worl 
films? 
NICHOLSON: I'm probably more pleased 
about it than I should be. The beauty 
about most of those carly films is that 1 
was—for the most part—working with 
the same group of actors and writers 
5 around the parties and collec 
In fact. in the. first and only film 
ected —Drive, He Said —1 used a 
number of my old cronies, And 1 was 
more than pleased that I was in a posi- 
tion to do so. 

PLAYBOY: Why was Drive, He Said origi- 
nally rated X by the Motion Picture 
Association of America? 

NICHOLSON; Because it had frontal. nudi- 
ty and it had someone who was fuc 
have an orgasm. The orgasm is audible, 
not visible. The person stys, “I'm com- 
ing" I'm convinced the rating system i 
100 percent corrupt. The censors say 
they're protecting the family un 
America when, in fact, the reality of the 
censorship is if 
X. but if you cut it off with a sword, 
GP. 

What prompted the М.Р. A. A. 
10 change Drive's rat 
NICHOLSON: Columbia 
it had never released an № movie. They 
showed it to a group of psychiatrists and 
they got hundreds of allidavits saying 
that this was a film that should be seen 
by audiences under 18 years of age be- 
cause it was a realistic represc n 
unfrightened look at a kind of social 
behavior. Ted Sorensen. thur Schle 
singer and a lot of heavyweight clergy 
wrote affidavits expressing their support 
of the picture. Ramsey Clark is a mem- 
ber of the law frm that handled our 
appeal of the X rating, and he did the 
final argument. I've got a lot of very 
interesting critiques of why the pict 
morally fit. Some of them went 50 
to say that it was imperative that people 
under 18 see the picture and that they 
should have to be апіса by а 
parent to ensure that parents also saw it. 
That was most g 
PLAYBOY: W 
order to qualify for the R xat 
NICHOLSON: There have nev 
cuts. So far, I haven't allowed any cen- 
sorship. If T let anyone censor the work 
so that ] сап make more money. then 
I'm going back on what 1 felt when 
1 made the film 
the entire Colum 


for some reason 


zi 


How do you feel now about 
in those carly low-budget 


ou suck a tit, you're an 


because 


ion, 


re is 


n any 


structure, should they decide that they 
want to cut it, because E don't have full 
control in that a But thus far. € 


wanted 45 cuts, so 
buted there. 
it's not being distributed in Eng: 


s not 
As of this mo- 


ment 
land. either, because I refused to censor 


the fucking seque 
don't mind the fuc 
coming. That's wh: 
In other words. 
quence, you can have everybody moan- 
ng. "Ht (себ good” and 
but you can't have someone 


e in de ear. They 


sayin 
PLAYBOY: 
scene br 


V few critics suggest that this 
nds you as one of the Там of the 


okl school raised о U sex ik 
dirty—something to be done in the back 
scat of a car in а drivein, Are they 


right? 
NICHOLSON: No, 1 don't think there's 
anything dirty about sex. 1 don't dislike 
sex in the back seat of an awomobile 
and I don't kuow why anyone would 
think irs dirty, [Us certainly not dirty 


to me. 
PLAYBOY: But the way you've shot the 
seene—with the 


girl bent over the fom 


«и 
unattractive: 


scat. the guy behind her, g 
—has been called rather 
Some of those same critics said it 
he fim to do it that way, but it wasn 
fun to look at. 

NICHOLSON: That was the most forth 
nk way of presenting it. I've 
the front seat of а two-seater 
"s how 1 happen to 
know it’s practically the only place in 
the car, the only position in which it 
«compl As for 
tractive or u 


сап һе hed. 


whats attractive or about 
viewing the sexual experience. In fact, I 
nailed a critic on the radio who wed 
the sime approach, I asked him, "What's 
really unattractive about it 
that the guy was kind of ginky-looking. 
And I had to ask, "Well is i only 


ши people who are allowed to en- 


unattractive 


joy sx?” Many people, in fact, have 
gone out of their way to tell me that the 


ed them on. E think it's 
scene that's heen shown 
c film to date, and yer all 
that’s vi the two people's faces. Т 
understood that it was an crotic sce 
when I did it. The whole point of ih 
film is that this isa young man involved 
in an erotic relationship with an older 
woman from whom he is ionally 
unable to detach himself. 


scene totally t 
the most eroi 
in a legi 


even 
she's tired of him. So that when I did 


the scene, 1 wanted it, in the cle 
most succinct way. to show thar these 
involved in a sexual re 
LT think T did it. T would hate 
to have someone say that 1 did anything 


st 


incomparable. And s 
At a pau s about yv 
By its 
your favorite way of life. 
Taste the best of Amer! \ rams and Be Sure. 


‘SEAGRAM DISTILLERS CO., NY. BLENDED WHISKEY. 85 PROOF, 6576 GRAIN NEUTRAL SPIRITS. 


PLAYBOY 


“tastefully.” bur T think that’s the way it 
came out. I'm bored to death by the 
overuse of that word tasteful 

PLAYBOY: Was the transition. from actor 
10 director difficult for you? 

NICHOLSON: For someone who'd never 
directed a picture before, Га had а lot 
of industry experience, but I was amazed 
at how little I knew about actual di- 
vecting when I came to do it. Mis 
takes went into the fi arcas out 
of my control. but. basically it's the mov- 
ie Dow aake: it's very deeply 
thought out. Drive. He Said doc 
the point of view of the revolutionary, 
of the celebrity. of the equivocited. pro- 
fessor. of the gungho basket 
who's atte 
er, of the mi 
ааз life. Tt 
view. Only 


n in 


med to 


int. black. nor of а wom- 
es all of these points of 
t the end of the Шт do you 


get a master look at it. When vou pull 
back one notch with the cimera, you see 
that this guy who's acted out all the 


of the revolution 
n draw a crowd on c 


dean 


doc: 


ту of the Sixties 
npus— 
being carted off in а 
cage. His friend comes and tries to jump 
onto the truck and stop it. but everyone 
else is just kind of on the way ло dl 
and that's it. 
PLAYBOY: What were you trying to ca 
vey? The shift in campus mood? 
NICHOLSON: Not ihe shift in риу 
mood but the universal fact that people 
do not respond to extremist behavior. 
They'll observe it пч get 
involved with it In "s suspect 
Thats why the Gabriel character in 
Drive, He Said is driven crazy. Every 
he says is essentially true. He feels 
the country i lly healthy. 
Some critics think that implified 
by reducing everything to sex, but if you 
the real facts of your life, you'll 
you're not releasing your sexual 
in trouble. If you саке a 


ev 


even thou 


18S, 


they we 
3 


but 


T ov 


© away three days and you 
don’t relate to 
all you're thinking about, e 


chick, pretty soon th 


з if you're 


out selling Bromo-Selzer. Within three 
days in a new town. you're 
"Why can't T find а beaver in a b: 


Or, if yowre 


"Why can't T 
find a guy? Why 1 the guys I meet 
so uninteresting?” It's not that sex is the 
imary clement of the universe. it's just 
when its unfulfilled, it will allect 
vou. I wish that we could all express our 
lity so openly that every party and 
every conversation. wouldn't have those 
undertones. They wouldn't if there was 
a ишу healthy ow through the society. 
PLAYBOY: What do you me 
flow? 
NICHOLSON: The absence of sexual һап 
pure Wilhelm Reich theme 
ive of Reichian polities. 1 


illustr 


personally 1 
apy and it's been very positive to me 
PLAYBOY: How did vou become involved 
in Reichian therapy? 

NICHOLSON: I never got into therapy 
until late for that sort of thing. И was 
prompted by the collapse of a long: 
sanding yebitionship with а female, It 
ended before I was ready to be out of it 
She felt Т wasn't мони 1 
She'd Tt was very sudden, very 
abrupt I couldn't 


е related to Reichi ther- 


r time. 


1 was unprepare 


cope with all the emotion. that was re- 


lensed as the result of being cashiered. 
PLAYBOY: Arc vou still in therapy? 
NICHOLSON: Үс 

PLAYBOY: 15 there dication when 


treatment will be concluded? 

NICHOLSON: Probably never. Once you're 
in it, you don't get out. You just gradually 
improve your healt and. your system. 
PLAYBOY: Whit is there about Reichiau 
therapy that makes it meaningful fo: 
you? 

NICHOLSON: The п of 
ma to me. Pes 
soften and relieve holdin eas of what 
Reich described vhich 
comes from pleasure denial or pleasure 
ar. When you dam up energy and 
feelings, sexual and otherwise. you begin 
to devour yourself, Our society is un- 
healthy. according to Reich, because we 
tend to fragment and separate sexuality. 
We talk about it in terms of scoring. We 
have аз nen 
and cunt men 


desi, 


structured. to 


es sense 


and Git om. 
а lip 


a and leg 


These are 


PLAYBOY: Aren't these partialisms 
male's preoccupation with scor 
what Carnal Knowledge is about? 
NICHOLSON: Reich and Feiffer have a lot 
in common. There's one difference. be 
tween Jules's outlook and mine. though 
In. his Playboy Interview. he talked 
about the speech that was left our of the 
film where my character says "Guys 
don't really like girls” Thar's something 
because it's true of only 


I disagree wit 
mos 1 
number of male 

have many потехи: 
Em not uying to р 


have at 1 
ad female 


son 


ist m equal 


friends. I 


re 
women: 
pants of every woman I'm imerested ii 
For example, there's 
living in my house now—a movie star— 
with whom I don't have a sexual rela 
tionship, Sally Kellerman used to sit on 
my lap and tell me about her boyfriends 
and her problems. Jonathan, in Carnal 
Knowledge. is exactly the opposite. I 
don't think he knows any way to com- 
mur е wilh women bevond sciewin, 
them. 

PLAYBOY: Didn't you ever go throug! 
same stage yoursel? 
NICHOLSON: Of course. Гуе bec 
a lot of infantilism sexually. 


When 1 


an sexual activity in € my 
point of view was simply to try to se- 
duce everyone E could. Mt that time, I 
had trouble with ejaculatio praecox. A 
lot of men have had this problem. 1 had 
Imost exclusively until I was 26 or so. 
You find vownself making it with a chick 
and. lik her eight times 
їн away youre coming. I's 
chore trying to go through to the second 
nd пос lose 


nest, 


your erection, In 


desper 
the 
through v 


ion. you find yourself gett 
chicks oif balling them. 
pulation of some kind: or 
you find yourself geting with another 
chick to share the load with you; any 
way to keep youself from saying. “I've 
got а major problem here, man. I'm not 
fucking for shit.” 1 would never tell you 
this могу now if T was sill in that 
Situation. T didn't know the story when 
I was there. Td say to myself, "Well. T 
haven't balled anybody in three days 

alb filled up." And га 
amature ejaculation, which is 
1 of impotence. The root of 


without 


and lm 


һе 


have а 


1 was in some kind of pleasure 

al; it was pretty unsatisfactory for 

the woman involved. Somehow. in the 
experience, 1 was making the 

п into a sort of mom—an authori- 

n female figure. That made me feel 

to the situation, small and 

childish. E indulged myself in a lot of 


butory bi 
these problems i 
D 


must 


1 solved none of 
ру: 1 


havior 
the 
But 


worked 
out 


for myself. y of them 


ight reappear. 

PLAYBOY: Somehow this, 100. recalls. Jon 
athan in Carnal Knowledg 
1 moved Jonathan a great 
1 toward me. Mike Nichols and 1 
greed that this guy must not become 
because that's пос 


ter, 
really whars being said. Jonathan is the 


lascivious 


SL sensi 


we character in the picune 


He's the one who doesn't recover. [rom 
the origi gle. He's never 
а Iter that, He 


winds up in 
veli 


y ritualistic but honest 
ship with a professional 


the best thing—not the worst 
—he can do for himself. He's a person 
with sexual problems who's never been 
fortunate enough to make a genuine 
contact. probably largely through his 
own doing. He's in a position where he 
truly doesn’t want to go on rifling wom 
en's cunts. By paving for it, he gets it oll 
with no muss, no fuss. Nobody's pissed 
oll. Nobody's concerned that he's. fuck 
ing them over. The hooker doesn’t care 
he stays the night at her place or she 
s the night at his. He hasn't solved 
his problem. positively, but 
himself the best negative answer that he 


st 


he's given 


can com 


up w 
PLAYBOY: Rosilyn Drexler, in The New 


Introducing the Cardin Javelin. 


Come in and slip into a two-door sporty 
model. 

"There are few designers in the same league as 
Pierre Cardin. Maybe it’s because he's just as good 
at thinking as he is at designing. (“People should 
feel like they're sitting in a living room instead of 
sitting in a machine?’) 

That’s why we asked him to take the sporty 
feeling of the outside of our Javelin SST and 
carry it through to the inside. 

Only Pierre Cardin can make upholstery look 
so elegant, door panels so classy, and a headliner 
so chic. 

And only American Motors can give you a 
Cardin label at the price of a Javelin. 


Besides that, the'72 American Motors Javelin 
is backed up with our Buyer Protection Plan. 
Which takes the frustration, aggravation and in- 
convenience out of owning a car. 

Stop by your American Motors dealer and try 
ona Javelin for size. 


PLAYBOY 


88 


York Times, wrot 
m 


“Carnal Knowledge 
у be a study of latent homosexuality 
squerading as two college roommates 
growing up from the mid-Forties to the 
present time." Is that a valid interpreta 
tion? 

NICHOLSON: When the term latent homo- 
sexuality is used by a lay person, 
as id. medically speaking, as was Ше 
use of leeches or any other remedy of 
the Dark Ages. I suppose any time you're 
doing a piece of work with two male 
leads, there will напон 
of latent homosexuality, But you. could 
probably project that implication. onto 
Romulus and Remus or Abbott 
Costello. E don't think that was really an 
intended statement of the wor 
PLAYBOY: How do vou respond to anoth- 
er ctc who has suggested that "the 
pathological histories [of the two 
leads] the authors give us as representa- 
. would be more accurately de- 
berrational extremes’ 7? 
There do exist people who 


be some co 


and 


NICHOLSON: 
are not part of today's pervasive sexual 


environment, But I think Nichols d 
ейге assumed that they were writing 
about very social people, working New 
Yorkers. uppe 
men who me meeting wom 
cocktails, having affairs 


middle-class professional 


ing 


tying 10 ma 


1 
and in cities all over the world. Probably 
these characters wouldn't be sophisticated 
enough for the European culture, where 
individuals aren't kept so ignorant about 
sexuality. But excluding the nonsexual 
person, 1 think we must assume that 
the characters played by Artie Garfunkel 

ore герге 
sentative than most people care to admit, 
Obviously, they domt represent people 
who live in a rural area; irs strictly an 
urban story. A man couldn't bc 
promiscuous а 


are millions of ma 


and myself. are probably [ar 


s openly 
Jonathan in а small-town 
Ile would be branded a 
social outcast, considered. predatory 
PLAYBOY: Опе of your lines in Carnal 
Knowledge goes: s «o elusive that 
not exist at all.” Do you think 
that’s trne? 
NICHOLSON: No. I don't know if I could 
uccinet definition of love, but 1 
it's there in my own life and in 
relationships with people. Even if 
they outlawed love tomorrow and found 
some way of eliminating it from eve 
thing but the mind, it would have 
isted in my lile, 
PLAYBOY: Presumably jou were 
during some portion of your 
via 


environmen 


Love 


love 
р 
What prompted the divorce? 

NICHOLSON: My marriage broke up dur- 


ing the period when I wits acting in a 
film during the day and writ film at 
1 simply didn то ask 
peace and quiet or to say. "Well. 
now, wait a second. maybe you're being 
unreasonable.” Г didn't have the 30 min 
utes I felt the conversation needed. If 
the other person can’t see that 1 haver 
got the time right now, I can't expl 
it to her. I've blown lot of signific 
relationships in my life because 1 was 
working and didn't have time to deal 
with а aisis, Another ce of 
trouble is t increasing celebrity 
becomes a threat to your partner. and 
you can't тити the celebrity off to save 
the relationship. Nor should you. I'm 
not terribly thirsty for the limelight. but 
obviously you don't get into the movie 
business if you want to be a recluse. 
PLAYBOY: Н. had one failed mar- 
riage, would you be wary of getting 
married again? 

NICHOLSON: I there is any realistic de- 
terrent to marriage, it's the fact that you 
n't afford divorce. If I should have a 
second unsuccessful. attempt 
iage. Td be financially гий 
of the inequity of the divorce laws, 
which sack the male in the courts. be- 
yond all possible belief. I'm hoping that 
the feminist movement in this country 
can get rolling toward achieving eco- 
nomic equality on this score. Actually, I 
don't have any problem with this. be 
cause Т have а good relationship with 
my ex-wife. Our marriage was lived out 
led. We just grew 
We were so obviously going in different 
directions that we were becoming a bur- 
den not only to cach other but to our 


ave time 


major 


sov 


your 


c 


rather tha 


child. We haven't excised each other 
from our lives. We've in communication. 
So | don't have ап ironclad policy 


ust remarriage. Bı 
itas a path to fulfillment 
PLAYBOY: Recently, a bill was introduced 
the Maryland siate I 
cating thrce-ye 
you think th: 
NICHOLSON: 

There m 
ism written 
the participar 


I'm not seeking 
her. 


islature advo- 


marriage contracts. Do 


y merit? 


proposal has 
Yeah, it certainly 
y be a certs 
to the relationship: 
aware of what i 
escape valve can or might do for their 
mental wellbeing, it сап only have a 
ve elect. Fortunately, Tm current- 
ly involved with helle 
Phillips—who has the same feeling about 
viage as I do. T don’t think either 
one of us particularly w; 
ried. Nor are we living t 
PLAYBOY: That arrangement is 
fashioned, isn’t it? 

1 don't 
not. Someone said 


does. 


amoun 


somebody—) 


know if its old- 


эпе or to me 
“L can never tell if you're be- 


." It may be 
ї 


Michelle and Т 
ing ultimately 
residences next то cach other, When I 
met her originally. it was under very 
tempestuous circumstances. She had 
been married. to good friend Dennis 
Hopper. bur the only lasted 
eight days. I started taking her out be 
cause she was depressed. 1 called. Den 
the phone beforehand, of course, 
and made sure how he ; T cooled it 
out with him. I don't think th 
t all He's into some 
relationship himself, As my fecling for 
Michelle deepened, 1 
"Look. I don't want to constantly define 
the progress of this relationship. Let's 
keep it instantatcous.” And is working 
beautifully. I'm mue to 
open up and ¢ amd he 
fulfilled in my relationship with a wom- 
an. Гуе spent a certain amount. of time 
completely unattached and I find. that. 
with someone makes 
из mor 
id learning how to share, I find when 
Im alone I very crusty 
thwarted in a dot of ways Where mv 
head is at now, expanding sexuality. is 
not most satisfied. through promiscii 
but through. continuously communicating 
with someone specifically 

PLAYBOY: Does that imply that you've 
eliminated all outside sexual experiences? 
NICHOLSON: | have had to eliminate 
anything. You know, I'm not a dead 
man. Like everyone else, Tm attracted 
ig or someone. But the 
that I'm fulfilled i 
s me feel less compelled to find сро 
gratification through seduction or cou 


ie talk 


in separa 


new fashioned, 


ıboı livin 


resentment EU 


told her up hon 


jov шу 


become and 


daily to somethi 
fact 


other arens 


quest. Therefore, if 1 see a twist I like 
walking down the street, Im not awo- 
matically going to so over and say 


who's that, whats her phone number, 
сай her up on rhe phone, how do you 
do, Tm doing ОК. how 
And by the time I 
there, Tm alread 
I don't have th 
Tve had it. 

PLAYBOY: What would your reaction be 
if Michelle—or a future spouse. for that 
matter—made it with someone else? 

NICHOLSON: I'm not all that willing to 
share, but my suspicion is that 1 
wouldn't let something that incidental— 
if that’s what it was—destroy something 
thats much more substantial to me. I 
don't know if I can live up t0 it, As I 
у, I'm not after all the women. any- 
more, That's a definite change. I've had 
days in my life, or three or four days at 
time, or weeks. when I've been with 
morc d that 
to bc an 
really get 
Is 


сап I 


v you, 


come ove! à over 


com 


g in my panis. 
experience 


ymore. 


four women, 1 found 


internal lie. 


You're just not 
it on past a € 
listic—like going 


iin. point. 


unr lor 


some 


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89 


PLAYBOY 


90 


endurance record. Everybody knows that's 
a pure сво trip. A couple of years ago. 1 
told a reporter that for years. Td balled 
all the chicks I wanted to. Well, man, 
chick D eve 


eve related to really re 
sented that statement. The Jonathan 
role in Camal Knowledge also turned 


off a lot of chicks In а casual conver: 
tion with me. you could have a certain 
difficulty in separating my sexual stance 
from Jonathan's. You cin imagine what 
that does to a chick who sees the film, 
then meets me, For her, I become that 
character. the negativity she 1 the 
film. And she doesn't want to be in a 
pussy parade. I mean, no chick wants 10 
be and of cunis. And I 
certainly don't blame 'em for that. 
PLAYBOY: Doesn't that make you feel some 
kind of need to explain what you're really 
like? 

NICHOLSON: Not really. Гус done enough 
of that. In fact, one problem I'm having 
lately is that I'm constantly pressured to 
explain myself to the public. That's why 
T never do television talk shows; I don't 
want do lose a certain. amount. of mys 
tery. The more people know about vou 
the harder it is for them to believe that 
ne other than yourself. The 
job of an actor is to creare an illusion of 
being many different people. Why should 
1 go on television and be a part of some 
one's Lue-night cookies and milk. telling 
them what Гуе done that day, and an 
amusing story about soand-so, and what 
it was like to Шаһар? 
PLAYBOY: Then why are you sp 
guts in this interview? 
NICHOLSON: At this moment, Em wishing 
I wasn't. Maybe because I know when 
the interview is read, it will add 
much confusion as to who I am as it wi 


aw. 


g your 


s 


1 


reveal trut 


PLAYBOY: Don't you reveal as much of 
yomself in your. performances as you do 
in an interview such as this onc? 
Friends have suggested that in the scene 


in Five Easy Pieces where you break down 
and cry in front of your father, with whom 
sou have not communicated for years, you 
were summoning up memories of your 
own futher. Were you 
NICHOLSON: Of course; who wouldn't in 
a scene like that? I had never really had 
a relationship оС any significant. longev- 
ity with my father. He w 
round. He was involved in а 
tragedy of alcoholism, which 
fom me. E just sort of i 
what he was like. He was 
drinker. I used to 
а child and 1 would drink 18 sus 
las while he'd h shots of Three 
Star Hennesey. But I never heard him 
raise his voice; I never saw anybody be 
angry with him, not суеп my mother. 
He was just а quier, melancholy, tragic 


cepted it as 


a very solt He died the 
ycar after | came to Ca 
PLAYBOY: Did thc absence of a father 
the household ny traumatic 
print on you? 

NICHOLSON: | don't k so, no. If 
did at all. it would be that T didn’t have 
anybody to model myself on after my 
own child was born. 

Why didnt you atend your 
s funeral? 

NICHOLSON: I wis living in Los Angeles 


at the time and the financial aspects of 


a 
im- 


leave 


the tip made it prohibitive—or at least 
gave reason for it to be prohibitive 
and 1 didn’t particularly want. to fly 


East just to go то the funeral D never 
attended any funeral unt couple 
of years ago, when my mother died and I 
went back to New Jersey. 
PLAYBOY: Had you delibe 
funerals? 

NICHOLSON: Yes Well. none had ever 
come along that I felt I needed to 
nend out of respect for the deceased: 
and D certainly was never attracted to 
funerals as occasions. When my mother 
died, the funeral was а good experience 


dy avoided 


for me. T was fully in touch with what 
was happening. I felt the grief, the loss. 
After D asked at a certain point for 


everyone to leave, when she was in the 
funeral home for what they сай the 
viewing, I stayed for an hour or so 
sitting next to the casket. I really tried 
10 let it all come through me and sec 
what my feelings were, and I was very 
enlightened by the experience, I felt 
at during her lifetime. I had commu- 
nicated my love very directly to my 
mother, We had many arguments, like 
everyone does with any parent, but I 
felt definitely that I had. been under- 
stood. There were no hidden grievances 
between us. T had always fulfilled. wh; 
ever her expectations of me were, as she 
had mine of рег. 1 didn't feel any sense 
of “Oh, T wish I had done this or that” 
t the moment of bereavement. I felt as 
good as you could feel about the death 
of anyone, 

PLAYBOY: Are you able to think ahead to 
your own death? 

NICHOLSON: My mind has difficulty sink. 
ing into that. [ always imagine myself 
locked in а casket underground, scrap- 
ing at the inside of it. or [ sense an 
incredible feeling of searing agony from 
burned. I've never liked the idea 
g dead, of short-circuiting out. So 
I'm nying to keep in shape: my doctos 
told me last year that | was in dismal 
condition and should start getting some 
Now, every morning, | jog 
around the reservoir on a small moun- 
tain near my house. That way, 1 [ecl 
more secure. But even so, my thinking 
about death has changed somewhat ro- 
ly. A dozen times Гуе been sitting at. 
e and thinking if D were to die at 
point, 1 would feel good about my 


PLAYBOY: "Ihen you have no particular 
regrets? 


NICHOLSON: It's funny you should ask 


that, because with my 33th birthd 
coming up on April 29nd, I've been 
thinking deal about what Ге 


done with my life—the various successes 
and failures Гуе had in everyday living 
as well as in my career. One of my 
biggest regrets is that Гап not academi 
Шу trained: it’s hard for me to talk in 
intellectual terms because Fm not a 
high-powered intellectual. 1 also regret 
that Т don't have more contaci with my 
daughter. She's eight now. 1 hope to be 


having more success in rhat arca 
35 is a major milestone, It's probably 
the last time you cin consider abandon- 


ted 


ing what you've 
into something totally new. 
recently about. gerting out of fi 
into some other bu 
maybe ranching—an alternative Гус 
considered in the pase One of my 
problems is that Fm a romantic. I con 
stantly allow myself to believe 

things could be beter. But onc has to 
examine what one docs with 
mianticism. Do you try to enhance it? Or 
do you drop it and become more prag- 
ic? It's not that I feel Гуе done less 


going 


the fu- 
le more p 
ing my first 35 


br 


Oscar give 


it peace of mind? 
NICHOLSON: | don't know. I'd love to 
win the Oscar, even though art. prizes as 
such arc never that satisfying. 
nly a light art form 
too serious about them. 


And mov- 


so you 


Wt 


ies are cer 
can't get 


ever do win an Oscar, I don’t think irl 
be for a long time—certainly not this 
усаг. Now that Туе had three good 


performances that people at rge have 
liked, it becomes harder to excite them. 


because of the standard of excellence 
you've set for yourself, And. familiarity 
breeds contempt. 


PLAYBOY: Since уо 
of your 35th 
how would 
NICHOLSON: 


ve 


ven the prospect 
hday so much thought, 
au like 10 spend ir? 

Il I'm in my regular ¢ 


ГШ be with a bunch of my friends 
uncorking a bottle of champagne and 
smoking a terrific. j That would 


help a lot, And. of course, Michelle will 
be there. No music. Just nice and quiet. 
Very clean ай. But T really don't want 
10 project my 33th birthe Better 
it should be a surprise—just like whatev. 


узт: 


er Pve accomplished in my first 35 years 
has been a surprise. Thatll take the 
sting ош of it and set things up nicely 


for the next 35. Come to think of it, 


maybe 35 isn’t so old after all. 


WHAT SORT OF MAN READS PLAYBOY? 


A young man whose design for living includes a wide range of interests and goals. Whether involving 
a derring-do sports activity or resolving a tough corporate problem, he handles each challenge with 
confidence. Successful in whatever endeavor he chooses, his income lets him seil high above the 
crowd. Fact: PLAYBOY is read by 53% of all men under 35 earning $15,000 or more. Want to get 
involved with this enthusiastic young man? Get into PLAYBOY. He has. (Source: 1971 Simmons.) 


NewYork - Chicago - Detroit - LosAngeles - SanFrancisco - Atlanta . London - Tokyo 


к: ADVENTU: | 
ne Р” A URES û 


Diken 


== A NOTE TO ANXIOUS PARENTS === 
| This is a moral tale and may be read with enjoyment and profit by boys of all ages. | 


ADVENTUREI 


cAn Act of Patriotism 


In which Our Hero performs a 
compassionate service and almost 
comes to grief. But by stick-to-it- 
iveness he triumphs in the end and 
learns a valuable lesson thereby. 


ood afternoon, Mr. Feldhausen,” 

smiled Chauncey Alcock, for it was 
indeed he. “Forgive me for being a 
minute late, but I tarried at the local 
Chinese laundry to listen to Mr. Hot 
Kip's radio in an effort to ascertain how 
the baseball game is progressing. Our 
lads are winning!” 

Mr. Gustave Feldhausen, proprietor 
of Feldhausen’s Drugstore on the cor- 
ner of Columbus Avenue and 74th 
Street in the city of New York, had 
been prepared to take his young deliv- 
ery boy to task for his tardiness. Yet, as 
was so often the case, the youth's come- 
ly appearance, charm of manner and 
amiable smile were able to dissolve 
anger and bring an answering smile to 
the lips of the dour (but goodhearted ) 
Dutchman. 

“Ach [Oh], Chaunce,” the merchant 
spoke, “zo many deliferies ve haf to 
make yet. Petter you should call your 
mudder now und tell her you vill late 
be brobably.” 

“An excellent idea!” young Chauncey 
cried, his blue eyes twinkling merrily. 
“In that manner, I will alleviate her 
worry and make certain she is able to 
obtain the nourishment of a substantial 
hot meal at her usual dining hour.” 

The lad used the emporium’s private 
telephone, but, being well versed in 
the customs of commercial practice, he 
carefully left a “dime” (ten cents) 
alongside the phone—a habit that Mr. 


Feldhausen looked upon with great 
approbation. 

“Hello, Mother mine!” Chauncey 
sang out when he recognized that dear, 
familiar voice. “This is your son, 
Chauncey. How is your health this fair 
afternoon?” 

His mother, the widow of a trolley 
motorman who, unfortunately, had been 
decapitated many years ago in a col- 
lision with a beer truck near Madison 
Square, replied that her dropsy seemed 
much better, thanks to the pills kindly 
supplied by Mr. Feldhausen, who al- 
lowed the widow and her hard-working 
son a professional discount on the 
purchase. 

"Excellent" Chauncey — chortled. 
“Mother dear, I must inform you that 
there is a good possibility I may per- 
haps be late in arriving home this 
evening, as there are many deliveries 
that must be made." 

Having assuaged his mother's anx- 
iety, Chauncey then turned to the task 
at hand, tackling it manfully. In the 
next two hours, he made a grand total 
of 12 deliveries, one of which was to 
a distant residence on 93rd Street, 
necessitating the use of a "bus" (om- 
nibus) rather than the bicycle that was 
his customary means of locomotion. 

Finally, shortly after five P.M, 
Chauncey had only a single delivery 
remaining. It was to a "fashionable" 
address on Central Park West, to the 
apartment of a Mrs. Yvette Balder- 
shank. The package itself was curious- 
ly shaped, being approximately two 
inches both in height and in breadth, 
yet almost ten inches in length. 

Mr. Feldhausen, noticing the lad 
hefting the package in his hand, smiled 
tolerantly and said, “Chaunce, you 
could guess a million years, you could 
nefer guess what iz in that pox.” 

“A long roll of nougat?” Chauncey 
hazarded. “Or perhaps a matched pair 


Fiction By LAWRENCE SANDERS 


93 


PLAYBOY 


94 


of plastic knitting needles? 
Nein [No], the merchant chuckled, 
“nein [no]. nein [no], nein [по]. It iz a 
powered: bybatery mazzager for women 
ly. It iz dezigned zo the woman she 
should rclaggs all over. You understand? 

“Gracious,” the youth said, and the 
claret rose to his handsome leatures. Yet 
he was not unaware of Mr. Fi 


Feldhausen’s 
implied meaning. Гог only that afternoon, 
in his class im elementary biufogy, the 
subject had been the reproductive system. 
of newis, and Chauncey had industrious- 
ly studied the physiology of the female 
body insofar as it applied to newts and 


of courze.” Mi. Feldhausen con- 
tinued to chuckle. “it Vt combare with 
you, Cha 

The propr 
cident that 


"s n- 
week pre 
tory in the rear 
ne lor the use 
I. which consisted of Mr. Feld- 
Mr. Irving Benoit-Dreissen, the 
y: and. Miss Beebee Undershot, 
lady deik who specialized in cos- 
tics. And. of couse, у Master Al- 


usen: 


Mihough Cha 
the sturdiest. he occisionally made use 


neey’s kidneys were of 


of the stores ablutionary convenience. In 
the incident mentioned above, he was 
within this sanctuary, having completed 
bout to fasten his 


wousers, In 
to latch 
heeding “a call of i 


the door, а ausen, 


expectedly, His eyes fell to Chauncey's 
unzipped state. 

“Goll in Himmel [Goshi] 
While th 

aher ga 
dized upon wh: 


he cried. 


boy modestly adjusted. his 
the merchant id 


nents, apso- 
ag the 
“treasure with- 
ce," that it would carn his fortune, 
it would prove to be the “making 
uncey Alcock, Fearing he 

y josied, with no notion of the true 
value of the awsome proportions of 
membrum virilis, the youth hurried ol 
and thought no more ol the matter 
Sow. taking up the oddly shaped pack- 
age, Our He 
locipede and pedaled oif to the apartment 
of Mis. Yvette Baldershank, his golden 
curs tossing in the breeze. 

пе the ad's suprise whe 
t C Park West, he found the 
street blocked oll by wooden barriers of 
the type utilized by ihe consibukuy 


when | ig for a parade or other 
civic activity of а similar magnitude, 


New York's finest? sand- 
uby, swinging his 
«I keeping an alert eye 
rious felon who might 
proached 


Espying one of 
a utter 

пепео 
peeled for 
come witl 
the unifor 
ful demca 

“I beg your pardon, Ollicer," he 
quired courteously, “could you 


me as to the significance of these prepa- 


the burly Hibernian 
n open and honest smile, 
expecting, momen 


“Begorra [Oh] 
lated with 
ade we 


Splendid?" cried Chauncey, hoping he 
might be able to spine а few moments to 
observe the marching hordes and. enjoy 
ning music. “And whom, may 1 

Ke will be parading 
А! the 
joined wisely, laying а 
his rose 's the rub—as 
the feller parlor. For 
we fear that several groups of coullicting 
philasophies amd. political: prat y 
пісірме. Hence, we are standing by 
event disorder and cl 


of the law 


ger alongside 


minion 


re- 


nodded 
uncasy 
nane serves 
à mere excuse to exhibit behavior of 


sU cours, 
“Тоз 
cele 


Chauncey 
often, in these 
ion of th 


gravely 
times. 
as 


iolent nature.’ 

Ch: 
TO the rear 
sought. 
the 
the tr 
reflect ui 
fellow ci 


ancey thereupon whecled lus “bike 
house 


of the apartment he 
He refrained fom cha 
ling of the delivery 
youth felt such an act would 
ly upon the honesty of his 
dicate a lack of Iaith 
s of human |, 

Upon entering the lobby of this large 
amd imposing structure from the rear 
Chauncey overwhelmed by its lux- 
тиге comforts. The Hoor 


was 
ih imi 


gleam 
tion 


vgs of cacti, tastefully 
framed. The uniformed donzel in charge 
a Nul 
the delivery boy to an elevator by which 
ight ascend to the apartment of Mrs. 
k- Whereupon he was whisked 
upward speedily and silently—a tribute to 
the highly advanced art of 
incoring. 
Upon asecrtaini 
apariment 02 


gently on the portal, which wa 
some vencer of pine showing some signs 
ol chippi around the 
lock. 
Almost 
femi! 


immediately a clear, musical 
ne voice inquired, “Who сез ect? 
s 1, Chauncey Alcock, delivery boy 
for Feldhausen's Drugstore locited on 
the comer of Columbus Avenue and 
Seventyfourth Street, ‘Your Health. Is 
Our Concern, " replied the polite lad. 

most at onc 


Hed, obse 
Do соте 
d the Tady closed 
the door quickly behind him and locked. 
it, He turned and swept her with a keen 


wy the 


glance, a smile tugging at his regular lips, 
so that she might not be olfended by his 
search i 


She was, he siw at once, 
man—perhaps as much as 3 
had an impressive embonpoint (presence) 
and was 


shortskirted dress 
es. which were | 
1 been accentuated by the judicious 
employment of n суе shadow and 
һе eyelashes, Mer һай was tinted in 
Beauvon’s oceangold shade and she 
xuded а xen of Pardon’ Morning of 
Love. Chauncey Meock was aware of 
these s details, since he sometimes 
sisted Miss Beebee Undershot at the 
of Feldhausen’s Dr 


ordered, naam,” Chauncey smiled, prol- 
fering the strangely shaped package. 
you maintain a monthly accoun 
there will be no need to recon 
pense me for this purchase at the pres 
cnt time. Thank you for your confidence 
in Feldh We appreciate your 


кет, 


са to depart, but Mrs. Bader 
shank pur û soft hand upon his arm 
Oh. don’ run away" she protested 
“What deed you siy your name сез?” 
“Chauncey Alcock, ma'am. 
‘Ah, yes. And what are the 
you? Chaunze. n'est-ce pas [1 guess?" 
Yes. That is true, 
unze, how ees cet I have 
note secu you belo E 
L only work. there part 


ancey replied, "after 1 
pleted my edu bors at the 
Tweed Senior High School, located at 
Amsterdam Avenue and Seventieth Street. 
I suspect ye v be in the habit of 


shopping personally at Feldhausen's Dr 
thus obviating the necesity of 


deliv 
that I would ne 


5. Hence, it is comprehensible 
have had the pleasure 
of meeting you in person ere now." 

Zul |Come]," Mrs. Baldersl 
“alors [sit down for a minute]. 
She Jed the youth to a couch covered 
ich brocade shot through with 
tneads of silver ind gold. 


said, 


ich," Chauncey 
Covered as it is with a 
through with threads 


aly. 
le shot 
id gold." 

пк you," the lady replied simply. 
"And now may I bring you zome ic- 
frashinent? You must be hot and per- 
spiry from your Tabors." 

Thank you, maam,” Chauncey re 
d, his regular features alight with 
ipatory pl would greatly 
enjoy an ice-cold glass of milk, grade А, 
if such is available.” 

“Bon [Coming up]" she cried 
disppeared into the kitchen 

In the few moments he was alone, the 
ambitious delivery bey devoted his time 
to bettering his mind by admiring the 
(continued on page 181) 


of silver 


asure. "I 


and 


"RA. 


T DUM 4 N 


“We kind of figured you'd go for it, Chief.” 


96 


article 


By DONN PEARCE 


flying the pot run from jamaica 
to florida is a snap—except if 
you're stoned (which you usually 
are) and someone has finked on 
you (which is more than likely) 
and the pigs are swarming all 
over your landing strip (which 
can be very bad for your health) 


THE 
THIRTY- 
CALIBER 
ROACH 
CLIP 


MONTEGO BAY. The tires of the 707 
squeal and burn. Seatbelt buckles 
click. Pass immigration. Customs. Get a 
complimentary rum drink. Shuffle and 
mumble and evade the crowd at the 
door, the hustlers, cabdrivers, baggage 
handlers. The cars аге European. 
Traffic is on the left. It is hot. Sugar 
cane, Runaway slaves. Pirates. Moun 
tains. Tropical fertility. Captain Blood. 
Jamaica the island where the ganja 
grows up to 20 feet high. A lid costs 
two bucks. A pound costs 20. 

During Easter vacation, they come 
pouring off the planes—freaks, heads, 
e Flowers, the children of Mc- 
Luhan, moon walks, nuclear fission, 
Yoo-Hoos and S 
da 


ngled garden of exotic 
60.100: philodendrons, ferns tall as 
houses, flowering trees like science- 
fiction bouquets, their branches covered 
with monstrous bromeliads, vines and 
orchids. They their leathers, 
le suedes, fringed vests, beards, hair, 
nd sandals, tote bags, tikis. cow- 
and tank tops. By nightfall, 
we settled into the cheap guest- 
houses a few blocks up in the hills 
They sit on the vei 
instead of joints— 
rolled in bread paper. They get it off 
with true righteousness, They don’t just 


ILLUSTRATION BY CHAS. B. SLACKMAN 


yam 


> 


ТТ 


PLAYBOY 


98 


Life 


get high. И is zowie all the way 
suspended. АП movement, energy, 
iety. commitment, risk, feeling, involve- 
ment is gone, blown away in thc smoke. 

Below them, on the edge of the sea, 
the rows of blue lights mark the runway. 
Red lights flash. White lights glow. Th 
moon supervises. And one more jet taxis 
to the end, locks its wheels and tests the 
thrust of the engines. Six freaks sit on а 
veranda. For ten minutes, no one h: 
moved. Mouths are slack. Eyes stare. 
Shoulders slump. As the jet begins its 
run, a kid without a muscle in his body, 
flicker in his face, without 
wrinkle in his brain finally gets it all 
togeth hand slowly leaves the 
edge of the chair and creeps up to his 
chest, where his fingers hesitate, hover 
ıd then finally scratch once, twice, stop 
and hang there, reluctant, undecided, аз 


without a 


the hand gradually sinks away. The en- 
gathers speed, 


es roar and the plan 
ging the sea and the mountains, 
at the sky. As it climbs at a 
quivering, passionate angle up toward 
the moon, there is a whisper on the 
veranda, hushed, exhaled, awed, hoarse 
and overwhelmed by the fuzzy. hot 
weight of the poetry— 

Wo-ooo-owww! 

But on that same veranda are two 
people who did not arrive by Pan Amer- 
ican. They flew down from Florida i 
four-passenger, single-engine C 
which they rented for $51 a 
duded. They are in their early 20s. 
They went to college. They come from 
comfortable middle-class homes. They 
are white. They are smugglers—not 
tourists who mail home a few souvenir 
gift packages or who go home with a 
few pounds of pot in the false bottom of 
a suitcase, stuffed into a hollow, carved 
wooden head, a native basket, a polished 
conch shell, hidden in a stuffed alliga- 
tor, wrapped around their bodies, kept 
under their hats or taped under th 
crotches. Nor are they the cool profes- 
sional couriers who bring in cocaine and 
heroin in specifically designed. jackets 
and corsets and are met by armed opera- 
tors who use codes, passwords, limou- 
sines, secret hide-outs and numbered. 
Swiss bank accounts, Theirs is not a 
syndicate of ethnic immigrants. fighting 
their way out of a ghetto. They are the 
new smugglers—hip, handsome, hairy 
and young. They are in it not just for 

ead; they are in it for the trip. They 
are romantic and revolu- 
tionary. Every day more and more of 
them are running around setting them- 
selves up in business. 

Never mind Hollywood. Forget chan- 
nel seven. Crooks are never caught as a 
result of scientific criminology. Deduc- 
tions are never made. Clues аге not 
assembled. Laboratory analyses of scraps 
of mate th samples, fingerprints, 


nonviolent, 


d the intrepid detective direct 
ly to the transgressor. Hell, no. You get 
ratted out. Some fink sings to the fuzz, 
You get infiltrated. Your chick gets 
pissed off and snitches or your crime 
partner gets religion or somebody wants 
to eliminate the competition or you get 
bum-rapped by phony evidence. Or you 
yourself go out and get juiced up or 
stoned and shoot your mouth off in a 
flashy discotheque or maybe somewhere in 
line, waiting for a McDonald's Big Mac. 
This is truer of smuggling than of 
ny other field of c endeavor. 
The United States Customs Agency 
xe has an entire network of undercover 
agents who sweep floors at the major 
airports, who pass the bottle with winos 
down on the docks, who tend bar, who 
deal drugs, who visit people out on bail, 
who approach people badly strung out 
and bribe them, cajole them, threate 
them. The Bureau of Narcotics and 
Dangerous Drugs does the same thing 
And the FBI and the town pigs and the 
sheriff's department and the state high 
way patrol. So getting caught in the act 
is one thing. So is fighting the laws of 
probability, delaying as long as possible 
that inevitable moment when a tire 
blows out, when a battery росу dead, 
when a package drops and breaks open, 
when some old lady with insomnia looks 
out the bedroom window and sees some- 
thing you wish she hadn't. 

Until then, you dummy up. Whatever 
it is, you do it yourself. Cut nobody i 
unless it’s necessary. Learn to fly your 
Learn to navigate. Ger a 
ary oneman boat with an 
ic pilot. Go slow. Take the long 
way around. Change techniques. Change 
routes. Dress very square. Drive ап old 
car. Live in an ordinary pad. Have noth 
ing to do with people who are too loud, 
too fast, too daring and too hip. Avoid 
the juices and avoid the And 
never y fri 

This is the style of the professional. 
But this isn't the way it's done by the 
new entreprer use money and 
security arc only part of it. These people 
use pot themselves, use it ceremoni- 
ously, philosophically, in the middle of 
a score, while sncaking past a Customs 
guard, while loading up or making a 
delivery. They know that Cannabis sativa 
the weed of truth sprouting through 
the cracks in the establishment wall. 
‘To them, smuggling is a movie. They are 
their very own Late, Late Show. They eat 
cookies to satisfy the munchies. They 
shi from the chill of their own high 
and their own daring as they watch them- 
selves break the law. 


erv- 


Mary is a nice little girl who lives in a 
nice litle twn. She looks like she 


side ol a 


should be selling tulips by th 


country road. 19. She has freckles 
and blue eyes. She wears her һай in 
pigtails оп the sides done up with rub. 
ber bands She has embroidered several 
butterflies and а few stars on the legs of 
her blue jeans. There arc big patches of 
red velvet on the knees and on the sea 
One day some dude named Randolph 
went over to her house at ten o'clock and 
said, "Hey! You wanna go to Jamaica 
and smuggle a little pot?” He gave her 
50 bucks to buy some straight clothes and 
at six o'clock they took off for Miami. 
That night they were in Montego Bay 


ler in Mary's 
home town. handled almost any kind of 
dope. He had saved his money for this 
trip and had already lined up all the 
customers he needed to get rid of the 
load. The trouble was, Randolph liked 
to have а lot of company around. It was 


nice to have somebody to rap with, 


somebody to share his wip. Because he 
wasn't terribly competent. Once he dis 
covered that all his bags ot heroin were 
short weight. He flipped completely and 
ran around accusing all his friends of 
ipping him off. It turned out that he 
had done it to himself. Randolph didn't 
know how to use the scales properly and 
had put the counterweight on the wrong, 
notch 

Meanwhile: Two other couples in а 
rented six-passenger plane with two 
seats removed were flying directly over 
Cuba on their way to Jamaica; the pilot 
was an Air Force veteran of Vietnam 
The three couples met at the Holiday 
Inn and the girls stayed by the pool 
while the guys renewed their contacts 
made during a previous trip. 

Then the two couples in the rented 
plane flew it to а secret airstrip that had 
been built by the CIA for the Bay of 
Pigs operation and afterward abandoned 
Since then, it had become a major base 
for smuggling operations. They taxied 
the plane to the end of the field, where 
а scattered group of contact men wearing 
different colored shirts were waiting. They 
were supposed t0 meet а man with a pur 

t who had 650 pounds for them 
nstead they contacted a man in a 
violet shirt who had 550 pounds for 
someone else. The price was ten dollars 
per pound, 

One of the kids opened the valve on 
the fuel tank to drain off any condensed 
water. But he didn't close it properly. 
They loaded up with 11 crocus sacks, 
each h 50 pounds of 
loose, unpresed pot, the cabin so full 
the bags were stacked up around their 
heads. The plane took off with its four 
passengers. But it took three tries to ge 
it off the ground. 

Randolph and Mary flew back to 
Miami by commercial airliner and met 
the other segment of the gang. Mary 

(continued on page 101) 


one stuffed. w 


for good clean fun — 

a quintet of easily 
installed, highly attractive 
splash-down spots 


modern living 


WA BACK, bathtubs were 

about as exciting as bath water. 
They came in one far-out 
model—white porcelain —and 

a soak session was always solo. 

But no more. The tubs shown here— 
built for up to six—are all 
purchasable off the peg. So 

turn on to one and watch 

bath night become a sybarite's 
delight. Rub-a-dub-dub! 


PHOTOGRAPHY BY MARIO САЗІШ 


Opening page: The 39-inch- 
deep fiberglass soak tub is a 
contemporary counterpart of 
the traditional wooden one 
used in Japan, by Ameri- 
can Standard, $450. Left: 
The Mini Spa, a free-stand- 
ing Pone playpen for 
six, can hold up to 450 
gallons; four swirl jets 

keep the water action Tree- 
ly flowing, from Allred's, 
$1475 including heater and 
pump. Our well-attended 
aquarian, above, cools it 

in a 27-inch-deep molded- 
fiberglass tub-shower, by 
Bartoli and Brady, $850. 


Left: The Bath is an illuminated 
84"x66" molded-fiberglass 

unit that can be either 

sunk into the floor or 

raised on a platform; it's 
available in six colors (blue, 
gold, avocado, sand, black 

and white) along with dual 
shower-and-water controls, 

by Kohler, about $1500. 
Those who find the idea of 
soaking in a fish bowl 
appealing will discover that the 
63x98" Plexiglas version of the 
classic footed bath (below) is 
clearly the appropriate tub for 
them to try, by Plasti-Vue, 
$800 not including fixtures. 


PLAYBOY 


104 


THIRTY-CALIBER ROACH СИР 


stayed at a house in Fort Lauderdale 
while Randolph and two other guys 
rented а boat that they were going to 
use for a wansfer of the cargo. But it 
was near the end of the hurricane season 
and the weather was very rough. They 
went too fast and pounded the boat sa 
hard the transom opened up and started 
to leak. So they went back to the marina 
ted another boat, The rain was 
and continuous. The visibility 
was poor. The crew got seasick; Randolph 
was suffering from an attack of hepatitis, 
the result of using dirty needles. To 
cheer themselves up, everybody got stoned, 
the boat drifting and wallowing in the 
trough of the short, heavy seas, the pre- 
arranged signal of recognition stretched 
out on the deck—a large Japanese 
battle Пар, 

Rapidly leaking 
forced to land in the Bahamas t 
There was no way to hide their 

gent 
ict. He accepted the 
dioed ahead to 


the plane was 
refuel. 


so they bribed the customs 
$900 to keep qı 
money and promptly 
the U. S. Customs. 
By the time the plane reached the 
rendezvous point, the gang in the boat 
had given up and gone in, leaving the 
plane aloue, unable to make radio con- 
tact, circling forlomly, the crew com- 
pletely freaked out, arguing with one 
the pilot and his ch 
to dump the whole load into the occan, 
the other couple screaming about the 
fantastic value of 


another, wan 


They had flown 


It was getting. dar 
over the Florida coast and were some- 
where near Boynton Beach when they 


spotted an orange grove and decided to 
drop the stuff there. They circled. They 
lost altitude, lowering the flaps and eas- 
ing back on the throule. But when 
they pushed the door open, the wind 
slammed it up against the guy's face and 
cut a gash in his mouth. On the second 
attempt, he almost fell owe of the plane. 
But his girlfriend fastened her bell to 
the buck of his and she held on with both 
hands. 

They should have been smiling. All 
this time, they had been on candid cam- 
era: first the radar screens and then the 
telescopic lenses in the helicopter that 
trailed them at a discreet distance, getting 
excellent closeups of the kid as ће was 
dumping the pot out the door. 

They shoved out all 11 bags and jubi- 
lantly flew off to Palm Beach, where the 
Customs and Immigration people gave 
them no trouble at all, politely ignoring 
the snarls in the flight plan, casually 
flashing a light inside the plane without 
noticing the two or three pounds of loose 
pot spilled on the floor. 

They rented a car and checked into a 
ppy and victorious, But before 
going to bed, one of the guys called 


(continued from page 98) 


up two buddies in G ding 
with them to come down immediately 
and help him locate the missing pot. In 
his hysteria, he began shouting imo the 
telephone, “IL you don't come down and 
help me, there's gonna be a dead body 
out there at the airport.” 

The kid was using a public telephone. 
The motel office was small and the land- 
lady was listening. He didn't know that 
President Nixon was due to land at 
Palm Beach airport that very night. He 
didn’t know that the landlady thought 
he was an assassin and called the FBI 

Not only that, he didn't know that 
only eight of those 11 bags of pot had 
actually landed in the orange grove. 
One of them had landed in the middle 
of a road intersection, causing an auto- 
mobile accident. Another landed in the 
back yard of a Florida highway patrol- 
man. Yet another hit some high-ten: 
power lines. It burst into flame and plum- 
meted to the ground in a smoking heap. 

` je, the boat crew was frantic, 
Randolph telephoning everywhere and 
finally renting a car to go looking in 
every airport in southeast At 
two o'dock in the morning, they found 
the plane and left а note on the wind- 
shield before checking imto a motel. At 
six o'clock, there was a phone call and 
at last the gang was reunited, all eight 
of them, plus the two fresh arrivals who 
had come down from Gainesville to help 
search for the lost treasure, Two girls 
stayed behind in the motel. Three guys 
went up in the plane to scout the area, 
returning when they had located the 
nge grove. The two cars took off. 
several joints of good Jamaica ganja 
passed around until everyone was cheer 
fully high. Mary was the only chick on 
the hunt and the only person who kept 
worrying about the funny helicopter 
that kept fooling around everywh 
they went. 

Both cars drove right into the grove, 
circling among the trees but managing 
to find only one bag of pot. lt was 
decided that the three guys should drive 
back to get the plane for another look 
But when they drove out of the grove, they 
were suddenly surrounded by six squad 
cars. Up in that private helicopter, di 
recting operations, was the sheriff himself 

The rest of it was Keystone Cops 
Everyone screamed. The bag of pot was 
dumped. Mary climbed a tee to hide 
The four guys ran in circles, yelling, 
tearing up phone numbers, stumbling, 
wild-eyed, scared. They were all too 
stoned to think clearly, but finally they 
got straight enough to form a plan. 
Prepared to claim they had just been 
ling in the grove, Mary and R: 
dolph boldly drove out in the car while 
the others split on foot. Miraculously, 


апу 


ог 


no one stopped them. They were Iree. 
But they picked up the others out on 
nd then decided to drive 
innocently by the pack of police cars 
and their captured. partners to sce what 
was happening. The fuzz was busy and 
they got away with that, too. But when 
they went back to the motel to rescue 
the two other girls, they were picked up. 
АП of them were handculled together i 
а chain and taken to the city jail. 

From there, it was just routine. Ques- 
tioned in separate rooms, one chick 
started laughing uncontrollably from 
the joyous insanity of it all. Bur the 
other went hysterical confessed 
everything, sig nd detailed 
statement that implicated everyone. She 
vas granted immunity from prosecution 
and released immediately on ten doll: 
bail. The chick was a sweet, innocent, 
Barbie-doll type. The fuzz didn't know 
that at the age of 24, she was also an 
experienced abortionist who made house 
s with her own home operating kit. 

Everyone else got his b: 
after a few days, hired lawyers and got 
sprung. Mary spent three and a half 
months in the county jail But the public 
defender got her off with two years 
probation, adjudication being withheld. 
That means no criminal record. She 
pleaded guilty to a charge of violating 
the public-health laws. 

The others will not be tried until the 
end of 1972. They face a possible sen- 
tence of five to 20 years and/or up to 
$20,000. The 550 pounds of pot would 
have been worth about $82,500 at the 
current local wholesale price. But they 
face a possible Federal tax of $100 
per ounce, which would come to a tot: 
of $880,000. 


and 


ng a long 


reduced 


In one of those marinas scattered 
along the Gulf and Atlantic coasts of 
Florida, there lives a man who calls 
himself Miles Valiant. Back when he 
was à salesman in Ohio, his name was 
. His friends drop in on 
him at almost any hour, his head. pop- 
ping out of the hatch of his 40-foot 
ketch in answer to their yells from th 
dock. After they go aboard, they some- 
times sit and watch him clean a few 
pounds of pot, packing it in small plastic 
sandwich bags. Or he plays his guitar. 
Or he feeds his two cz 


a wrinkled 
white shirt and white-duck pants wi 
the bottoms rolled up. He wears sand 
and a very wide belt with a huge brass 
buckle. He has a h 
eyes that squint with constant. amuse- 
ment. On his head is an incredibly wide 
brimmed planter's hat of woven stra 
the flat crown circled by a brightly colored 
sash. Captain Valiant’s conversation is 
ored with four separate accents that 
drift ош, the basic Ohioan 
(continued on page 211) 


Is 


ard. a hooked nose, 


and 


{ 


i 


quiz By JAMES F. FIXX some cerebral high hurdles to give your gray matter an olympic workout 


RACTICALLY ALL OF Us tend to take it for 

granted that intelligence is a good thing 

and lack of intelligence a bad thing. A lit- 

Пе reflection will show that it’s not so 

simple. Being bright can create real prob- 

lems, and very bright people often suffer 
under handicaps undreamed of by their less gifted breth- 
ren. Nor are these, as one might suppose, simply the 
burdens imposed by a heightened awareness, a greater 
sense of life's complexities, a more poetic and sensitively 
tuned soul. They are, on the contrary, distressing in 
quite practical ways and they almost always start early. 
The following conversation between а second-grade 
teacher and a bright pupil is a case in point: 


TEACHER: I'm going to read you a series of num- 
bers: one, two, three, four, five, six, seven. Now, 


which of those numbers can be divided evenly by 
two? 

PUPIL: All of them. 

TEACHER: Try again. And this time, think. 

PUPIL (after a pause): All of the 

TEACHER: All right, how do you divide five evenly 
by two? 

PUPIL: "Two and a half and two and a half. 

TEACHER: If you're going to be smartalecky, you 
can leave the room. 


The story is, 1 am sorry to say, a true one. So is another 
story, of a high school student, told by educator Alexan- 
der Calandra: Asked on an examination to describe а 
method for finding the height of a building by using a 
barometer, the student, bright enough to be bored by 
thc obvious answer, decided to 


ILLUSTRATION BY JOHN CRAIG 


(continued on page 120) 105 


| 


She Greatest 
Restaurant 


Gr She Wk? 


R= == opinion By Koy Andries De Groot $= 


a gourmets lifelong search 
for the perfect meal takes him 
to a simple café 
in the valley of the rhone 


=== = 


Sf. is the world’s greatest res- 


taurant? This impossible question was 
broached during а Manhattan lunch 
with a gourmet friend some months 
ago. We agreed that the food at this 
particular restaurant was none too 
good and the service almost too bad. 
So our conversation turned to great 
restaurants we had known and I men- 
tioned the almost-perfect cuisine and 
service of the restaurant of the broth- 
ers Troisgros in the small French 
town of Roanne, about 87 kilometers 
northwest of Lyons. 1 had last visited 
Troisgros back in 1961, when it was 
rated with only one star in the Guide 
Michelin. Now the brothers had three 
stars and the gourmets of the world 
were beating a path to their tables. 
My friend asked: "Do you think 
Troisgros might be the greatest?” 
Instantly sensing a magnificent op- 
portunity, I said that since I was leav- 
ing for France the following week, 1 
would gladly dine at Troisgrosand give 
him a definitive answer, provided he 


would pay for one of my meals. A few 
weeks later, after visiting some vine- 
yards along the Rhine, I crossed from 
Germany into France bound for 
Roanne, a small, semi-industrial town 
of about 50,000 people. Perhaps be- 
cause itis the center of a large farming, 
meat-packing and  wine-producing 
district, it looks a bit like a New Eng- 
land market village. In front of the 
railroad and bus slations, the single 
main street opens out into the place de 
la gare, with freight yards, boxcars and 
factory chimneys all around. Facing the 
stations is a row of shops: a camera 
mart, a supermarket, a hairdresser, a 
display of bicycles апа motorcycles 
on the sidewalk, a gas station and, on 
the corner, two shops joined below a 
vertical neon sign reading TROISGROS. 

Iremember, when I first saw the sign 
in 1961, 1 couldn't believe that the 
word Troisgros was a family name. 
How would you like to be called John 
Threefatmen? | thought the restaurant 
must be named (continued on page 116) 


108 


Mol 


ONE OF THE WORLD’S FOREMOST AUTHORITIES ON 
RIBS, CHEESEBURGERS, FRENCH FRIES AND FROSTY 
MALTS TAKES A GOURMET TOUR OF KANSAS CITY 


OPINION BY CALVIN TRILLIN 


The best restaurants in the world are, of course, in 
Kansas City. Not all of them; only the top four or five. 
Anyone who has visited Kansas City, Missouri, and 
still doubts that statement has my sympathy: He 
never made it to the right places. Being in a travel- 
ing trade myself, | know the problem of asking 
someone in a strange city for the best restaurant in 
town and being led with great flourishes to some 
purple palace that serves" Continental cuisine" and 
has as its chief creative employee а menu writer 
rather than a chef. 1 have sat in those places, an 
innocent wayfarer, reading a three-paragraph de- 
scription of what the trout is wrapped in, how long 
it has been sautéed, what province its sauce comes 
from and what it is likely to sound like sizzling on my 
platter—a description lacking only the information 
that before the poor trout went through that process 
it had been frozen for eight and c half months. 

In American cities the size of Kansas City, a careful 
traveling man has to observe the rule that any 
restaurant the executive secretary of the chamber of 
commerce is particularly proud of is almost certainly 
not worth eating in. Lately, a loyal chamber mon in 
practically any city is likely to recommend one of 
those restaurants that hcve sprouted in the past 
several years on the tops of bank buildings, all of 
them encased in glass, and some of them revolving 
—offering the diner not only Continental cuisine and 
a 20,000-word menu but а spectacular view of other 
restourants spinning around on top of other bank 
buildings. "Ho, thank you," | finally said to the 12th 
gracious host who had invited me to one of those. 
“1 never eat in a restaurant that’s over a hundred 
feet off the ground and won't stand still.” 

Because 1 grew up in Kansas City and now live in 
New York, there moy be a temptation to confuse my 
assessment of Kansas City cuisine with some hallu- 
cination by one of those people who ore always 
feverish with Hometown Food Nostalgic. | myself 


have known such people. | once hed to take to 
public print to disabuse William Edgett Smith, an 
otherwise stable friend of mine, of the bizarre 
notion that the best homburgers in the world are 
served not ct Winstead's, which happens to be іп 
Konsas City, but at the original Bob's Big Boy outlet 
in Glendale, California, Smith's home town. ("А gim- 
mick burger with a redundant middle bun," | said of 
the Big Boy, іп on analysis Smith has never dared 
answer.) 

1 am aware of the theory held by Bill Vaughan, 
the humor columnist of The Kansas (ity Star, that 
millions of pounds of hometown goodies are con- 
stontly crisscrossing the country by U.S. Mail in 
search of desperate expotriates—a theory he de- 
veloped, | believe, while standing in the post-office 
line in Kansas City holding a package of Wolferman's 
buns that he was about to send off to his son in 
Virginia. 1 con end any suspicion of bias on my part 
by recounting the kind of conversation ! used to have 
with my wife, an Easterner, before I took her back 
to Kansas City to meet my family and get her some- 
thing decent to eat. Imagine that we are sitting ot 
some glossy road stop on the Long Island Express- 
way, pausing for а bite to eat on our way to a 
fashionable traffic jam: 

ме Anybody who served a milk shake like 
this in Kansas City would be put in jail. 

HER: You promised not to indulge in any of 
that hometown nostalgia while I'm eating. 
You know it gives me heartburn. 

м: What nostalgia? Facts are facts. The milk 
shake being served at the Country Club Dairy 
in Kansas City at this moment is a fact. What's 
giving you heartburn is not listening to my ob- 
jective remarks on Konsas City food but drink- 
ing that gray skim milk this bandit is trying to 
pass off as a milk shake. 

HER: | suppose it wasn't you who told me that 


DESIGNED BY TOM STAEBLER /PHOTOGRAPHEO BY DON AZUMA 


PLATYROT 


по the end he had cut off and using 


anybody who didn't think the best 
ger place im the world was 
in his home town is a sissy. 

me: Bur don't you see that one of 
those places actually is the best ham- 
burger place in the world? Some- 
body has to be telling the truth and 
it happens to be me. 


My wife has now been to Kansas City 
many times. If she is asked where the 
best hamburgers in the world are served, 
she will unhesitatingly answer that they 
are served at Winstead's. Our little girl, 
who is three years old, has already been 
10 Winstead's a few times and, as an 
assessor of hamburgers, she is, I'm proud 
to say, her father's daughter. The last 
time 1 left for Kansas City, I asked her 
what she wanted me to bring back for 
her. “Bring me a hamburger,” she said. 
1 did. 


Almost by coincidence, 1 flew to Kan- 
sas City for my gourmet tour sitting 
next to Fats Goldberg, the New York 
pizza baron, who grew up in Kansas 
City and was going back to visit his 
family and get something decent to eat. 
Fats got his name from the fact that he 
used to weigh 320 pounds Теп or 
12 years ago, he got thin, and he has 
managed to stay at 160 (half of the Fats 
Goldberg I once knew) ever since by 
subjecting himself to a horrifyingly rigid 
cating schedule. In New York, Fats eats 
virtually the same thing every day of his 
life. But he knows that even a man with 
his legendary will power—a man who 
spends every evening of the week in a 
Goldberg's Pizzeria without tasting— 
could never diet in Kansas City, so he 
Jets himsclf go whenever he gets inside 
the city limits. For Fats, Kansas City 
is the DMZ. He currently holds the 
world’s record for getting from the air- 
port to Winstead's. 

"Yowll go to Zarda's Dairy for the 
banana split, of course," Fats said on 
the plane when he heard of my plans. 
“Also the Toddle House for hash 
browns. Then you'll have to go to Krespe's 
for a chili dog. 

"Hold it, Fats," I said. "Get control of 
yourself.” He was looking wild. “Try to 
remember that this is a gourmet tour. 
Gourmets don't eat Kresge chili dogs. 
Naturally, I'll try to get to the Toddle 
House for the hash browns: they're 
renowned.” 

T gave Fats a ride from the airport. As 
we started out, I told him I was sup- 
posed to meet my sister and my grand- 
father at Mario's—a place that opened a 
few years ago featuring a special sand- 
wich my wanted me to try. Mario 
cuts off the end of a small Italian loaf, 
gouges out the bread in the middle, puts 
in meatballs or sausages and cheese, 
closes everything in by turning around 
аза 


plug and bakes the whole thing. He says 
the patent is applied for 


"Mari Fats said. "What М. 
When | come into town, I go 
Winstcad's.' 

"My grandíather is waiting, Fats" I 
said. "He's eightyeight years old. My 


sister will scream at me if we're late." 

"We could go by the North Kansas 
City Winstcad's branch from here, get a 
couple to go and eat them on the way to 
whatzisname's" Fats said. He looked 
desperate. 

"That is how Fats and I came to start 
the gourmet tour riding toward Mario's, 
clutching Winstead’s hambingers that 
we would release only long enough to 
snatch up our Winstead's Frosty Malts 
("the drink you eat with a spoon") and 
discussing the quality of the top-meat, 
nogimmick, class burger Winstead’s 
puts out. We didn't need many words to 
convey our thoughts. 

"Ahhhh," Fats would say, looking al- 
most serene as he took another bite of 
his double cheeseburger with everything 
but onions. 

“Oohhhh,” I would say, feeling posi- 
tively serene as I bit into my double 
hamburger with everything. including 
grilled onions. 

By the time we approached Mario's, I 
felt nothing could spoil my day, even if 
my sister screamed at me for being late. 

There's LaMar's Do-Nuts,” Fats said, 
pulling at the steering wheel. “They do 
a sugar doughnut that’s dynamite.” 

But my grandfather . I said. 

“Just pull over for a second," Fats 
"We'll split a couple." 


I can now recount a conversation 1 
would like to have had with the “free- 
lance food and travel writer” who, ac- 
cording to The Kansas City Star, spent 
а few days in town and then called 
Mario's sandwich “the 
Гуе ever had to eat in Kansas 
mean no disrespect for Mario, whose sand- 
wich is probably good enough to be the 
single best thing in most cites. 


ME: I guess if that’s the best thing 
you've ever had to eat in Kansas 
‘ity, you must have got lost try- 


ing to find Winstead’s. Also, I'm 
surprised at the implication that 
a fancy freelance food and travel 


writer like you was not allowed into 
Bryant's Barbeque. м only the 


ngle best restaurant in the world. 
FOOD AND TRAVEL 


FREE-LANCE 
WRITER: 1 happen to like Hal 
food. It’s very Continental. 

Me: There are no Italians in 
Kansas City. It’s one of the town's 
few weaknesses. 
rirTw: Of course there are 1 
ns in Kansas City. There's a huge 
Italian neighborhood on the norih- 
east side. 

wr: In my high school, we had one 


guy we called Guinea Gessler, but he 
kept insisting he was Swiss. I finally 
decided he really was Swiss. Anyway, 
he's not running any темаш 
He's in the finance business 

ешти: Your high school is not the 
whole city. I can show you statistics 

Me: Don't tell me about this town, 
buddy. 1 was born here. 


ctually, there probably are a lot of 
good steak restaurants there, because of 
the stockyards," New Yorkers say—swol- 
len with condescension—when I in. 
form them that the best restaurants in 
the world are in Kansas City. Bui, as a 
matter of fact, there are not a lot of 
good steak restaurants in Kansas City. 
"There is only one and it gets its meat 
from the stockyards in St. Joc. 50 miles 
away. Fortunately, it is the finest steak 
restaurant in the world. The name of it 
is Jess & Jim's and it’s in Martin City, 
Missouri, а tiny country town that is 
now part of Kansas City but still looks a 
little bit like a tiny country town. The 
most expensive steak on the menu is 
Jess & Jim's Kansas City Strip Sirloin 
which sells for $6.50, including salad 
and the best cottage fried potatoes in 
the tristate area. They are probably also 
the best cottage fried potatoes in the 
world, but ] don't have wide enough 
experience in eating cottage fries to 
make a definitive judgment. 

Jess & Jim's is a simple place, with 
decoration provided by bowling, trophies 
and illuminated beer signs. But if the 
proprietor saw one of his waitresses 
emerge from the kitchen with a steak 
that was no better than the kind you 
pay $12 for in New York—in one of 
those steakhouses that also charge for 
the parsley and the fork and a couple of 
dollars extra if you want ice in your 
water—he would probably dose up for 
ever from the shame of it all. I thought 1 
might be too full for the Jess & Jim 
strip. Normally, Fm пог a ferocious 
steak cater—a condition 1 trace to my 
memories of constant field trips to the 
stockyards when I was in grade school 
(I distinctly remember having gone to 
the stockyards so many days in a row 
that 1 finally said, "Please, teacher, can 
we have some arithmetic?” But my sis 
ter, who went to the same school, 
we never went to the stockyards— 
which just goes to show you how a 
person's memory can play tricks оп 
her) Also, I had been to Winstead's, 
Mario's and the doughnut place for 
lunch and had spent the intervening 
hours listening to my sister tell me 
about a place on Independence Avenue 
where the taxi drivers eat breakfast and 
a place called Laura's Fudge Shop, 
where you can buy peanut butter. fudge 
if you're that kind of person, and а 
place that serves spaghetti in a bucket 
(My sister has always been interested in 
(continued on page 208) 


says 


їп a bizarre mélange 
of fun and fantasy, 
painter mel ramos 
burlesques the forties’ 
plastic calendar art 


Ku 


During the post few years, many so-cclled pop artists seem to hove 
avoided painting the female form, perhaps nat knowing quite what 
approach to take toword it. Not Mel Ramos. Concentrating almost 
solely on the figure in his oftentimes outrageous paintings of becuties 
with burgers and beasts, Ramos stresses o distinctly ortificial image 
characteristic af Forties calendar art. But, while his girls hove thor 


plastic look of the pop style, he doesn't see his art as pure pop. 


“For quite some time now," he says, “my work has been primorily 
with the nude figure, secondarily with pop’s imagery.” One af his 
first figure paintings—Virnaburger, obove—wos port of what he calls 
his abject series, in which glossy-looking women are placed with com- 
ial products. “I didn't really intend this ta be o pointing of Virna 
says Ramos. “I just sow her in o mogozine ond thought hers 
wes c good frontal face. And, to be honest, the bady isn’t Virno's." 


111 


In 1967, Ramos, right, began progressing from the object to the oni 
mal series of paintings based, he says, on the “Beauty and the Beast 
syndrome." Among the beauties he put on canvas were his wife— 
“ту favorite model"—in Rhinoceros, above, and Eastern King Bird, 
above right; actress Ursula Andress, reclining in the foreground of 
The Red Fox, left; and several Playmates. (Readers no doubt will 
recognize January 1971 Playmate Liv Lindeland in the arms of 
an ursine friend in Giant Ponda, far right) Whot’s more intriguing, 
perhaps, than the voluptuous women is the sense of abstract, am- 
biguous spoce, which begins at the painting surfoce and projects 
forward, so the forms literally explode in the viewer's face. But 
since his recent completion of the bizarre arimol series, Ramos 
has been evolving a new spatial concept. "I'll still be working 
with nude figures." he explains, “but МІ be placing them at various 
oblique angles within a context that 1 call specific interior space." 


Though Ramos’ beast-womon conjunctions ore def- 
initely erotic, there is still а curiously paradoxical 
sense of delicate control about each of the pictures, 
as in Gerilla, above, and Elephant Seal, right. 


CIGARETTES 


Cigoretie Girl, above, is from his early-Sixties 
series of pinup girls with commercial products. And 
it was that group of offbeat paintings—with its 
strong emphasis on the i 
thet Ramos feels imi 


PHOTOGRAPHY BY ROBERT MATES ANO PAUL KATZ 


PLAYBOY 


16 


Greatest Restaciant?P (continued from page 107) 


med The Three Fat Men, Not true. 
Troisgros is the legal name of the owners. 

Theirs is the simplest three-star en- 
trance one has ever seen. No canopy. 
No doorman. You step straight from the 
idewalk into the dining room. A wall 
1 elegantly dressed young woman 
greets you with: "Good evening, 1 am 
Madame Jean Troisgros" She succeeds 
at once in making you feel that you are 
being welcomed as a guest in her home. 
(Her name is Maria and she told me 
later: “While I am seating the guests, I 
try to find out what it is essential for us 
10 know in order to serve them as pe 
fectly as possible. Are they grands gas- 
tronomes who will say, ‘Attention! I 
will give the orders? Or are they be- 
ginners wanting to learn? At once, 1 
relay the information to my husband or 
my brother-in-law in the kitchen so that 
one of them can come out and discuss a 
suitable meal") 

The modemized countrystyle d 
room i: 


ing 
comfortable but not luxurious. 
Tt was almost full and I counted 52 
people. obviously local businessmen 
with their wives and children, giving the 
place the atmosphere of а neighborhood 
bistro. The French chatter was at the 
level of а roar. At the back, gruff voices 
at the bar seemed to be debating by 
shouting, and from the open kitchen 
door came voices raised to an ecstasy of 
прег. The maitre d'hòiel, Gérard, of- 
fered the three prix fixe menus, at $9, 
512 and $16, tips and taxes, but not 
wines, included. (The Troisgros broth- 
ers say. “Our lower prices are fixed for 
the service of our local customers. They 
come once or twice a week and bring 
us three quarters of our income") 

Two impeccably dressed chefs with 
hauts chapeaux sauntered casually out 
of the kitchen, grinning broadly, shak- 
ing hands, patting shoulders, quipping 
in high-speed French. Although the two 
brothers have stayed together and 
worked together all their lives as if they 
were twins (Jean is now 45 and Pierre, 
43), they could hardly be more different 
in appearance and personality. Jean is 
six feet tall, with a long [ace and a man- 
ner that marks him as a rebel, a satirist, а 
man with a faintly mocking outlook on 
life. Pierre is short and round, w 
body so flexible it might belong to a 
ircus clown, but with a determined and 
serious face. Both are true Burgundians 
in their gaiety, their irreverent laughter, 
their lightning intelligence and wit. 

They "proposed" my dinner in the 
ic Troisgros way. Printed menus are 
for conceited tourists who think they 
know best. Wiser guests leave it to the 
Troisgros brothers to tell them what is 
in the cupboard that is not on the 


ha 


menu. It may be а superb pike, caught 
in the river an hour before—or a brown 
bear, trapped im the forest by some 
gypsies, who know that there is always 
cash available at the Troisgros kitchen 
door. That night, there were live young 
female lobsters, just arrived by truck 
from the fishing port of Plougasnou on 
the Brittany coast. Also, Pierre was just 
back from a hunting trip in the Loire 
marshes and offered a wild duck. 

The first course on the 516 menu 
was the great specialty of the house, Le 
Foie Gras Frais en Terrine—mixed duck 
and goose livers baked in a casserole and 
served cold, in slices that were pure 
velvet, richer and softer than I had ever 
asted. When Pierre came by, I demanded 
the secret. He said: “No secret. We bake 
the livers very slowly. The terrine is 
just. heated in the oven, then taken out, 
wrapped in seven thicknesses of woolen 
blankets and Jeft on the kitchen table 
to cook itself overnight.” 

"Then came the lobster, prepared û la 
Cancalaise, Cancale being a small sea 
in Brittany. "The secret is in the 
you flame the lobster,” Pierre poi 
out. “You pour the calvados into 
pan, never over the lobster, and let only 
the flames lick the flesh, so as not to 
overpower the marvelous natural taste. 
With the shellfish, I had an excellent 
1966 assagne-Montrachet—a noble 
white burgundy. 

Pierre's roasted wild duck arrived gar- 
nished with peaches glazed in Vermont 
maple syrup, an unbelievable combina- 
tion that turned out to be unbelieva- 
bly magnificent. The swectness had been 
cut by а touch of vinegar and what was 
left was the perfect foil for the gaminess 
of the undercooked flesh. It was all a 
very fragile balance that a red wine 
would upset, so Pierre chose a rich and 
soft 1966 Meursault—a private bottling 
‘specially to go with this dish. 

Then came a welltaden cheese cart 
nd, finally, Pierre's specially prepared 
dessert: a mille-feuille, so light that one 
half expected it to float away, filled with 
whipped cream and covered by a layer 
of glazed fresh raspberries. 

With the coffee, there appeared at my 
table the grand old man of the Trois 
gros family, papa Jean-Baptiste—the 
most imaginative, most intelligent, most 
irrepressible, most ribald, most suspi- 
and yet most charming Bur 
gundian I know. He was carrying an 
ancient, dusty. unlabeled bottle. which 
he opened at the table and poured into 
brandy snifters. He said he had found it 
in a comer of the cellar and wasn't 
quite sure what it was but guessed that 
it might be a marc de Pommard, private- 
ly distilled and bottled by one of their 
Pommard suppliers and sent to Trois 
gros as a Christmas present about 40 


cious 


Jt was smooth nectar—ap- 
proximately as powerful as liquid dyna- 
mite—but with а body, bouquet and 
flavor that were near great. 

T shall hotly deny that it was this bj 
dy that brought to the point of 
decision. As I sipped, I thought of the 
overall q s of the ner. lt had 
been astonishingly light—with neve 
trace of that blown-up feeling that in 
evitably seems to accompany a "great 
meal" One could sum it up by saying 
that there had not been the slightest 
pomposity about the food, the service 
nor the welcome. This perfectly uncom 
plicated food is the final and absolute 
overthrow of all the show-off haute cur 
sine that arose out of the ех! mt 
excesses of luxury under Louis XIV at 
Versailles, 

I turned to J} "How did 
you achieve this quality? How was it 
done?” 

He said, "Our results may appear sim- 
ple, but our methods are complicated. 
Stay with us a few days; my boys and I 
will show you." 

As the dining room began to empty 
and the pressures of the evening de- 
creased, Jean-Baptiste took me to a table 
in the bar, opened a bottle of cham- 
pagne and told me the story of how this 
extraordinary restaurant was created out 
of the vision of a single family, over 
three generations and 75 years. In the 
1800s, Jean-Baptiste’s father ran a popu 
lar café in the Burgundian wine capital 
of Beaune. There, just before the tum 
of the century, Jean-Baptiste was born. 
“You see, monsieur, I was in the restau- 
rant business the first day of my life. By 
the time I was seven, I could recognize 
all the different. brandies blindfolded. 
I learned to taste food and wine with the 
customers. Those earthy Burgundians 
taught me that with food, the most im- 
portant thing is quality and simplicity. 
while with wine, it is quality and compli 


n. 
By the time he was 12, Jean-Baptiste 
was already dreaming of being the pro 
prietor of a great restaurant. At 20, he 
broke away from the Beaune bistro 
went to the small wine town of Chalon 
sur-Saóne and soon opened his own Café 
des Négociants (Café of the Wine Ship- 
pers). He married his Burgundian M 
and they had two sons, Jean and Pierre. 
Jean-Baptiste said, "When I took cach, 
turn, to be baptized, I first checked the 
holy water in the font 
dropped in а pinch of salt 
drops of fine olive oil. Then | asked 
monsieur le curé to please also baptize 
the baby as a good chef. 1 don't believe 
he did much, but I did think I detected 
a few stirring motions in the gestures of 
his right hand over the baby.” 
Jean-Baptiste saved his money in a 
sock in the mattress and ided to move 
(continued on page 244) 


nd surrepi 
and a few 


REGARDLESS of. whether you call 
the inflatable edifice pictured 
below a bubble building, hemi 
sphere house or pumped-up 
pleasure palace, we're sure you'll 
agree it's the most revolutionary 
concept in mobile living since 
somebody invented the tr 
and a lot more fun. Crea 

a Los Angeles design group 
named Chrysalis, the polyvinyl 
Pneudome, when collapsed, fits 
into a 49”х60”х19” box. To turn 
on the bubble-house machine. 
simply spread the dome out on a 
flat surface, fill the base ring with 
water (optional cable anchorings 
also available), then attach the 
portable air blower to an external 
port—and up she rises. In about 


eight minutes, you have nearly 
500 square feet of living space 
to do with as your imagination 
dictates. And, to make sure your 
air castle doesn't crumble, you 
keep the blower going; a gentle 
current of air not only ensures 
that the pad remains inflated 

but ventilated and dust-free, too. 
Although opaque models are 
also available, we prefer the 
transparent number, shown here. 
The price for a Pneudome that's 
25 feet in diameter and ready to 
rise is about $1950 including 
blower—a sum that surely won't 
blow your bank account. For more 
information, write to Playboy 
Reader Service, 919 N. Michigan 
Avenue, Chicago, Illinois 60611. 


playboy reports on a portable pleasure dome with inflationary proportions 


THE BUDDE HOUSE: f NINO MARKET 


Top: The tosk of toting the 

house to a level site provas light 
work for two venturesome 

couples intent on roising high the 
bubble-roof beom. Once infloted, 
right, o full-blown pneumotic 

pod meosures 25 feet in diomeler. 


4 
й 


Weekend pied-à-terre or garden gazebo—the Pneudome's use expands to the limit of the imagination. Above, left to right: Once the base is 
filled, inflation begins. Then, as the bubble swells, the exterior is cleaned. Less thon ten minutes later, the pad is reody for habitation. 


h 


Above: A panoramic vista of the Pacific complements the dramatic interiar of the Pneudome; с blower hooked up to the house keeps it 
118 inflated ond dustfree. The multicolored vertical fiberboord cylinders at the rear of the room ore nat structural but act os space dividers. 


PHOTOGRAPHY BY RICHARD FISH 


Most of the bubble pad’s furnishings are fram H.U.D.D.LE, a Los Angeles shap that 
recycles industrial discards by converting them into inexpensive yet handsome furniture. 


= 


PLAYBO 


120 


SUPERINTELLIGENT (continued пот page 105) 


describe not onc but two alternate meth- 
ods: Take the barometer, he wrote, and 
drop it from the top of the building, tim- 
ing the interval until you see it smash on. 
the ground. Then, using the standard 
formula for acceleration of a falling ob- 
ject, calculate the height of the building. 
Or, he went on, find the owner of the 
building and say to him, “If you'll tell me 
how tall your building is, I'll give you 
a good barometer.” At last report, the 
student was in trouble both with his 
teacher and with his school’s hierarchy. 

Intelligence, of course, is a problem not 
just to the young. A study at the Uni 
versity of Michigan revealed that execu- 
tives with high I.Q.s are as likely to 
create problems as to solve them—to 
stumble over their own brains, as one re- 
port expressed it. Businessmen with only 
average 1. Q.s being less apt to confuse 
themselves with a multiplicity of factors, 
are often much better problem solvers. Оп 
the other hand, it must be admitted that 
being bright does have some undeniable 
pleasures, and it's one especially beguil- 
ng subspecies of those pleasures that this 
ticle is all about. But how can you tell 
whether or not these mental push-ups and 
deep knee bends are for you? And how 
serious a symptom is it if they aren't? 

First, it's a good idea to remember that 
intelligence isn't any single, readily de- 
finable quality but a complicated assort- 
ment of many different qualities. Some 
of us possess some of them, some of us 
possess others. Intelligence tests have 
been campaigned against on precisely 
those grounds—that too many of them 
treat intelligence as if it were a single 
identifiable thing, like red hair or double- 
jointed thumbs. The fact is that no one 
knows exactly what intelligence is. The 
only thing of which we're absolutely cer- 
tain is that intelligence tests measure 
what intelligence tests measure. Yet we all 
agree, somehow, that there is such a thing 
s intelligence. We are all likely to agree, 
too, that it is parceled out quite un- 
equally among the human species. 

It’s been shown that I. Q.—which is 
nothing morc than intelligence in rela- 
tion to an individual's chronological age 
—has certain characteristics. Researchers. 
have discovered. for example, that it 
normally stops increasing at the begin- 
ning of adolescence (except in the case 
of certain very bright people whose in- 
telligence may continue developing un- 
ul 18 or so). This is not to say that the 
ability to use one's brain power cannot 
be improved well beyond that time. In 
fact, a reader who can work his way 
through the following puzzles will prob- 
ably discover a number of mental tech- 
niques that had not previously been in 
his armamentarium. He will be, it is 


tue, fundamentally no brighter than 
when he started, but he may be able to 
do more with his intelligence. For that 
Teason, he may actually score slightly 
higher on an І 0. test. And he will 
certainly look more intelligent to any- 
one watching him unerringly solve an 
unfamiliar problem. 

‘The typical puzzle, especially the kind 
mos admired by the superintelligent, 
has its roots in mathematics in one or 
another variety of logic or in words, or 
it may be based on a combination of 
these. We offer here puzzles that are а 
maddening mélange of those three ele- 
ments. Most of them have a kind of 
do-it-with-mirrors difficulty. That's pre- 
cisely what makes them the charming 
diversions they are. They require some 
logical (or, on occasion, illogical) leap 
thal, in human terms, is the rough 
equivalent of a monkey in a cage sud- 
denly realizing that it can use a stick to 
reach a banana: no stick, no banana. 
And so it is here: no leap, no solution. 
Ц that seems obscure now, it won't take 
you long to see what we mean. 


Т. A snail is at the bottom of a well 30 
feet deep. It can crawl upward three 
fcet in one day, but at night it slips 
back two feet. How long does it take 
the snail to crawl out of the well? 

2. How many nines are there from one 
to 100? 

3. Punctuate the following so it makes 
sense: John while James had had had 
had had had had had had had had a 
better effect on the teacher. 

4. Three boxes are labeled APPLES, or- 
ANGES and APPLES AND ORANGEs. Fach 
box is labeled incorrectly. You may 
select only one fruit from one box. (No 
feeling around or peeking permitted.) 
How can you label each box correctly? 

5. All readers of this article greatly love 
puzzles. Some readers of this article are 
famous. Some famous people are great 
lovers. Therefore: 

a. All readers of this article are 
famous. 

b. All great lovers are puzzling. 

c. Some famous people love puzzles. 

d. Some readers of this artidle are 
great lovers. 

6. Move two matches and make four 
squares: 


7. What eightletter word contains only 
one vowel? 


8. What word contains all five vowels in 
alphabetical order? 

9. What word contains three sets ol 
double letters in a row? 

10. There are two jars of equal capacity. 
In the first jar there is one amoeba 
the second jar there are two amoebus. 
An amocba can reproduce itself in three 
minutes. It takes the two amoebas in 
the second jar three hours to fill the jar 
to capacity. How long does it take the 
one amoeba in the first jar to fill that 
jar to capacity? 

11. Draw four connected straight lines. 


without retracing your path, that pass 
through all the points: 

о о о 

о o o 

o o o 


12. Three intelligent men, applying for 
a job. scem equal in all pertinent attri- 
butes, so the prospective employer. also 
an intelligent man, sets a simple prob- 
lem for them. The job, he says, will go 
to the first applicant to solve it. A mark 
is placed on each man's forehead. The 
three are told that each has either а 
black mark or a vhite mark, and each is 
to raise his hand if he sees a black mark 
on the forehead of cither of the two 
others. The first one to tell what color 
he has and how he arrived at his answer 
will get the job. Each man raised hi 
hand, and after a few seconds one man 
came up with the answer. What color 
was his mark and how did he figure it 
ош? 

13 MAN: How many birds and how 
many beasts do you have in your zoo? 

ZOOKEEPER: There are 30 heads and 
100 feet. 
MAN: I can't tell from that. 
ZOOKEEPER: Oh, yes you can. 
Can you? 

14. A hunter arose early, ate breakfast 
and headed south, Half a mile from 
camp, he tripped and skinned his nose. 
He picked himself up, cursing, and con- 

ued south. Half a mile farther along, 

he spotted а bear. Drawing a bead, he 
pulled the trigger, but the safety was on 

The bear saw him and headed cast at 

top speed. Half a mile farther, the | 

er caught up, fired, but only wounded 
the beast, which limped on toward the 

east. The hunter followed and half a 

(continued on page 210) 


fiction 


By HERBERT GOLD 


THE HAST HITCHHIKER at the bend of 
the road out of Mill Valley, heading 
up the coast toward Stinson Beach 
and Bolinas, had a face like an aban- 
doned coal-mine disaster site—col- 
lapsed shafts of blackened meat, eyes 
smokily polluted by internal fumes, 
crevices and sun-bared teeth. Frank 
shivered at that scene of death. 

The second hitchhiker, 50 yards 
farther on, near the Yogurt Shack, 
looked to be about 17; she had long 
straight hair, a blouse that pulled 
out of her jeans when she raised her 
thumb, only a blotch of sunburn on 
the high cheekbones to mar her per- 
fect teeny's unborn moonface. There 
was a gentle roll of baby flesh where 


ONE WAY 
TO 
BOLINAS 


fight back, he told himself—it 
was too early to quit this life 


the blouse was raised. In the twin- 
kling of this summer season, it would 
surely disappear into ancient history. 

Frank stopped not for the first 
hitchhiker but for the second. 

"Oh, wonderful" she said, гип. 
ning prettily to the open door, her 
wrists jerking sweetly in that way of 
running girls not yet fully tuned 
into their new bodies. She didn't 
say groovy, she didn't say, "What's 
your sign?" She said, "Hey, you want 
to give a ride to my old man, too?" 

She indicated Mr. Mine Disaster. 

Frank paused. 

“Oh, never mind, then,” she said 
and jumped in. She turned and 
waved goodbye to the man of gritty 
rage, who, in a burst of speed, 
had run (continued on page 222) 


SCULPTURE BY ADOLPH ROSENBLATT 


once looking for 
a career in pictures, vicki peters 
now loves taking them 


SURP! LY ENOUGH, the foremost reason 
for Playmate Vicki Peters move from St. 
Paul, Minnesota, to Southern California 
three years ago was not the change in 
climate. As a lifelong resident of the Twin 
ies area, 23-year-old Miss April was 
accustomed to those infamously raw north- 
em winters: "Winter sports are so popu- 
lar in St. Paul that I actually looked 
forward to cold weather.” It was Vicki's 
career ambition that prompted her to 
head for Los Angeles, where she intend- 
ed to become an actress, "I'd modcled 
and thought I could do that while look 
ing for film opportunities" Vicki did 
find steady employment—posing before 
a still camera (she was featured in 
PLAYBOY'S September 1970 uncoverage, 
The No-Bra Look)—but she had less 
success getting movie parts. "I had some 
minor roles, but got depressed with my 
lack of real progress.” Her professional 
life continued to languish until she 
met a prominent young commercial pho- 
tographer, Harry Langdon (son of the 
silent-film star). "Harry and I began dat- 
ing and I got interested in his work. 
Then one day he asked me to fill in for 
s secretary, who was taking a vacation. 
I agreed to do it for a couple af weeks. 
‘That was almost two years ago, and I've 
been there ever since." What's been es 
pecially rewarding for Vicki is the full 
range of respor ies she's assumed— 
from darkroom developing to taking up 
the camera herself. “I've learned about 
g there is to know at a photo 
studio. It's a thoroughly creative process 
and Ive become fascinated with it. 
Now, although I still have ideas about 
an acting carcer, I think I'd be equally 
happy to stay in this business. Td also 
like to make movies. And the possibility 
of directing excites mc, too. There are 
a lot of ways I could go. A number 
of film people I've recently met might 
be able to help me in the future.” No 
matter how many professions Vicki tries, 
readers will agree that there’s certainly no 
danger of her suffering from overexposure. 


Right: Taking an afternaon off from her job 
in a Los Angeles photo studio, Vicki selects 
some fresh fruit ot the Formers’ Market. 


vie 


Above: Vicki checks the results of o shooting, then (below 
left) ossists boss/boyfriend Horry Langdon (with сатего). Be- 
low right: She proves to be а girl Mondoy-through-Fridoy. 


Th 


Above: Later in the day, Horry and Vicki load equipment into а station wagon to get some action shats for an album caver. “What | love 
most about my work as Horry's assistant is that our shooting schedule changes almost every day. It's campletely unpredictable.” So, Vicki 
learns as she leaves the studio (belaw), is California's spring weather. Struggling with her convertible tap in the rain, she gets thoroughly soaked. 


GATEFOLO PHOTOGRAPHY BY NARIO CASILLI 


Above: At home, Vicki decides to toke advantoge of the rare spring shower and changes into clothes 
that give her a most oppecling wet look. Below: After her romp in the roin, she dries her hair. 


PLAYBOY'S PARTY JOKES 


Darling,” exclaimed the former divorcee to her 
fifth husband on the morning after their wed- 
ding night, “I didn't know you had such a 
small organ?" 

"Well. my dear." he replied. "how was I to 
know I'd find myself playing in a cathedral?" 


А sporty tax consultant tells us that birth- 
control pills аге deductible only if they don't 
work. 


Standing around the water cooler, an office 
wit was heard to remark, “The population 
explosion would be less of a problem if light- 
ing the fuse didn't feel so good y 


Our Unabashed Dictionary defines ill-bred as 
the U.S. dollar. 


* said one fellow as he was leaving the 
skin-flick theater, "I've forgotten my hat!” 

“No, you haven't,” whispered his compan- 
ion. "It's hanging on your lap.” 


Two nuns ran out of gas on the highway and 
flagged down a truck to obtain some. The 
truck driver was more than willing to oblige 
them but said that he didn't have a receptacle 
to use for the transfer. “ 
one of the nuns. “We do. Sister and I are 
returning from a nursing assignment and there's 
а bedpan in our car." 

So the truck driver siphoned out some gaso- 
line and went on his way and the nuns 
embarked on the task of pouring it slowly 
and carefully into the tank of their саг to 
avoid spilling any of the precious liquid. 

A passing motorist slowed down to see what 
the women were doing. “Christ!” he exclaimed 
to his companion. “That's what I call faithl" 


While making a delivery, the comparatively 
innocent grocery boy had fallen into the hands 
of а sexually aggressive woman. After he had 
undressed, as he was told to do, she said, "Let's 
do sixty-nine!” And before the lad had a 
chance to reply, she had done the positioning 
and begun. 

After it was over, she asked, "How was that? 
Did you like iv” 

“Great,” the boy sighed, “but if you think 1 

can do it sixty- eiie morc times, you're crazy!” 


The suburbanite and his neighbor were con- 
stantly trying to outstatus cach other. One day, 
the first man mentioned smugly that his daugh- 
ter had just been accepted for admission by a 
ionable women's college. “That's nice,” 
plied the other, "but the only thing the girls 
really learn at that place is how to screw." 

“TH have you know that my wife went to 
that school!" retorted the fellow. 

"Did she?" came the answer. “Take it from 
me, she certainly could use a refresher course.” 


Our Unabashed Dictionary defines athletic 
supporter as a prickpocket. 


The waggish manager of a club for lawyers 
decided to have the term JURY ROOM lettered 
on the doors of the men’s and women’s lava- 
tories—with the proviso that the sign painter 
add nunc below the term on one door and spurt 
below the term on the other. 


Shortly after dinner one Sunday, a husband 
past his prime became distressed when his 
wife jealously told him that her friend could be 
satisfied five times nightly by her spouse. That 
night, the creaky Casanova performed well the 
first two times, took a nap before and after 
the third, just barely made the fourth and 
fifth, then triumphantly went to sleep. He 
awoke at ten A.M. Late for work, he ran into 
his boss in the hall. “I don’t mind your tardi- 
ness,” his boss rumbled, “but where the hell 
were you Monday and Tuesday?” 


ak 
GU 


Amm 


The coed had admitted under parental ques- 
tioning that she was pregnant but added that 
she really couldn't say who was responsible. 
“All right, young lady," bellowed her fathe 
“you march right upstairs to your room 
stay there until you can give us a more definite 
answer than that.” 

Later in the day, her voice rang down 
the stairs: "Hey, Dad, I think I have an idea 
now!” 

“I should hope so,” shouted back her father. 
“Who was it?" 

"Well, I'm still not positive, but I've got it 
narrowed down. It's between the basketball 
team and the band.” 


Heard a funny one lately? Send it on a post- 
card, please, to Party Jokes Editor, PLAYBOY, 
Playboy Bldg., 919 N. Michigan Ave., Chicago, 
ЦІ. 60611. $50 will be paid to the contributor 
whose card is selected. Jokes cannot be returned. 


P 


KEPHAS 
AND 
ELOHENU 


a man of the cloth should know better than to interrupt 
a celestial scrabble match between a couple of top guys 


humor By J.B. HANDELSMAN 


DARKNESS is on the face of the deep. 
The voice of ELOHENU is heard. 
xLOHENU: Let there be light. 

Nothing happens. 

ELOHENU: Come on! Let there 
be light. 

The lights suddenly and daz- 
zlingly go on. kernas is sitting at 
а desk, writing. 

ELOHENU: Who's coming? (KE- 


enas goes on writing) Who's 
coming? 

KEPHAS: What whos coming? 
No one is coming. 

ELonesv: J thought 1 heard 
somebody. 


xrPnAs: Nobody. You think I'm 


hiding somebody? Look in the 
desk. 
FLOMENU: All right, all right. 
KEPHAS; Go ! Satisfy your- 


self. (Pulls out drawers) See? No- 
body. (Closes them) Did you finish 
the crossword puzzle? The Sunday 
? 

ELOHENU: Don't talk about 
puzzles. They don't 
even tell you if the answer is in 
one word or two. And you know 
what they had in the last onez 
"Cockney's house." Can you imag- 
ine what the answer was? Three 
letters. 

KEPHAS: O-M-E. 

ELOHENU: Ycah. 

&kPHAS: It's a real education 
Heraldic emblems, Bulgaria 
coins, genus of willows. What's 
the matter? Nothing to do? Bored? 
Want to play Scrabble? 

ELOHENU: Spot me fifty points? 

kernas: OK. (Takes Scrabble 
set out of desk. ELOMENU sits. Each 
takes a letter out of bag.) Е. 

tLOnENU: I've got an Н. You 
go first 

KePHAS: What do you mean? 
Highest letter goes first 

ELONENU: So? You've got an S. 

керназ: F, F, Гуе got an F! 

ELOHENU: Oh, an F. (They take 
letters and arrange them on their 
racks) 1 thought you said an 5. 
(Looks up) Who's coming? 

kEPHAS: Again with who's com- 
ing? You can't hear me when 1 
say “F,” but for people who aren't 


Times om 


crossword. 


ILLUSTRATION BY FREO BERGER 


there, your hearing is twenty 
twenty. 

FLOHENU: Yeah. Well, some- 
body's got to come sometime. Let's 
see, have I got a word? Yes! 
(Places four letters on board) 

КЕРНАУ: BARK. Three, four, 
five, doubled is twenty 
(Makes a note) And I add an 5 
and make WAVES. So that's elev 
en for BARKS and four five, 
double score on the V makes eight 


thats thirteen, fourteen, fifteen. 
Twenty-six 
ELOHENU: Is there а word 


rebarksz 
KEPHAS: Of course not! Did you 
have that R-E from before? 
Enler MARVIN HARVEY JARVIS 
ELOHENU: Yes 
kernas: Then why didn't you 
make BARKER? 
Jarvis clears his throat. 
ELOHENI Oh, am I dumb! 1 
didn't think of it 


KEPHAS: Well, too bad. Play 

ELOHENU: Here's a good one 
RIVET. 

КЕРНАБ: RIVET. Mmm. Опе, 


two, six, no, the four is tripled 
Sixteen. You've got thirty-six. 
Now, watch this. TOE spells toe, 
and I alo make TRIVET and 
OK. (Jarvis clears his throat) 
That's nine, and five are fourteen, 
and three are seventeen. Not so 
much, but its cute. Forty-three 

ELOHENU: Very cute. Very, : 
cute. OK is acceptable? 

kernas: Here's the diction 

ELOHENU: I believe 
it. Gute, (Sees Jarvis) Who's that? 

kernas: Your wrn. Will you 
stop imagining all the time that 
someone is coming? I'll let you 
know when somcone is coming, 
1 promise. 

Jarvis: 1 hope Fm not inter 
rupting anything 

KEPHAS (jumping up): 1 didn't 
hear you come in. Did you hear 
him come їп? How long have vou 
been here? Are you alone? 

Jarvis: Quite alone, I'm afraid. 
It's been a rather long and ardu 
ous journey. 

ELONENU (staring at the board) 
Arduous. Seven letters. If 1 could 
make ARDUOUS, Td be on 
Easy Street 

KEPIIAS: 


y 
I believe 


Well, sit 


down. Sit, 


133 


PLAYBOY 


134 


sit. Should 1 call down for coffee? 
Jarvis: That would be more than kind 
REPHAS (lo ELOHENU): You want 
anything? 


ELOHENU: Regular coffee and a cheese 
h. 

kernas (picking up phone): Get me 
the kitchen. The hot kitchen. 1 
a guest a new arrival. Hello, Gennaro 
Two regular colfees, опе black, one 
cheese Danish—— Oh, no more cheese? 
How about a prune Dani 
assent) One prune, one collec ring 
and. 

Jarvis: Could I have a sweet roll? 

KEPHAS: A sweet roll? 

Jarvis: Or a doughnut, please. 

kernas: Or a doughnut. Listen, have 
you got a doughnut? Jelly doughnut all 
right? Yeah, OK, that’s it. Thanks, Gen- 
naro. (Hangs up) 

Jarvis: It never occurred to me that 
you would have these amenities. In fact, 
it never occurred to me that there would 
be eating here. But 1 find I'm quite 
hungry, oddly enough. 

керил: Oh, it’s not surprising. When 
did you last eat? 

Jarvis: Well, yesterday, I suppose, if 
you count being fed intravenously. 

ELOHENU (as if meditating ils use in 
Scrabble): In-tra-venously. 

KEPHAs: Well, there you are. Nothing 
since yesterday. So. What's your name? 


Da 


Jarvis: Marvin Harvey Jarvis. Rever- 
end Marvin Harvey Jarvis. 
kepHas: Wouldn't M Jarvis be 


enough? Or Harvey Jarvis? Or Marvin 
Harvey? 

JARVIS; | suppose so. But—well, I 
have а cousin named Marvin Jarvis; he's 
M: in Service Jarvis. His mother was a 
Service. 

KEPHAS: 


His mother was a service? 
(To ELOHENU) Do you understand that? 

Jarvis: Three names have a majestic 
rolling sound, 1 always thought, and 
when I was younger, particularly, I 
thought, for a young fellow going into 
the ministry who wants to make а name 
for himself—or three names, ha-ha! 

kernas (mystified): And to m 
ters worse, your mother was a service. 

JARVIS: No, no, that was my cou 
mother! But I don't suppose you want 
to hear about my cousin's mother. He'll 
tell you all that himself in due course, 
when he arrives. Although I suppose she 
herselt is already here. As are my own 
beloved parents. I'm afraid I'm inter- 
rupting a game of some kind. 

kernas: Oh, that’s all right. He was 
bored, so we played. E haven't 
be bored. 1 have all this paperwork to do. 

Jarvis: I see. 

Enter а small оемох with coffee, etc. 

kernas: How much? (ELOHENU takes 
oul some money) 

beson: A dollar twenty. 

Jarvis: Let me, please. Oh, damn itl 
I haven't any money. 


ime to 


Jarvis: Thats another thing that sur- 
prises me. The fact that you use money. 

FLOWENU: Oh, we don’t care about it, 
but they like it downstairs, They say it’s 
the root of all service, No offense to your 
mother 

Jarvis: It ist I ist Гуе never shied 
away from it myself, 1 can tell you. Will 
that mean a black mark against my 
name? Mmm, this coffee is good. Му 
compliments to the chef. But Гуе always 
said, the family that prays together pays 
together. That's where Г come in. Well, 
gentlemen, you have the advantage of 
me. 

KEPHAS: I know. 

Jarvis: | mean you haven't told me 
your name: 

КЕР 

ELOHENU: Elohenu. (Both shake hands 
with Jarvis) 

Jarvis: You fellows are angels, 1 sup- 
pose. You'll pardon me if I act like a 
hick. After all, I'm new here, although 
I've been talking about this place for a 
long time! 1 don't suppose, for exam- 
ple, that there are really pearly gates. 

kepHas: There are pearly gates, but 
they're in the shop for repairs. People 
keep breaking off pieces for souvenirs. 1 
don't understand it. ГЇЇ tell you one 
: 1 wouldn't let them in if L caught 


JARVIS: You wouldn't let them in? 
KEPHAS: Absolutely not. 
Why, you don't mean to say 
you're Peter? The fisherman? 
kEPHAs: Who has time to fish? Day in 
and day out, all 1 do is mind the door. 
yarvis: I'm sorry. Should I have 


bowed? I had no idea it was you. You 


look so—my word! Imagine meeting 
Saint Peter! And you, sir, are you a 
saint, too? 


ELOHENU (uncomfortably): No, mot 
really. 
kernas: Why don't you tell him? 


You're not ashamed, are you? (ELOHENU 
shakes his head) Well, if you're not 
ashamed, why don't you tell him? He's 
God. 

Jarvis: God! (ELOHERU nods, still some- 
what embarrassed but beginning to smile) 
God! But how can you be God? 

ELOHENU: Well, somebody has to be. 

Jarvis: But God? Good God! Why, 
that’s—it’s great! Just great, simply great! 
You mean you're the Lord of hosts, the 
Almighty, the Supreme Being: 

KEPHAS: Come on, you're embarrassing 
him. 

JARVIS: But think what this means to 
me, as a minister of the Gospel, a man 
of God, as some are pleased to call me, 
10 come face to face with the Lord God 
in the middle of a game of Scrabble. 
God plays Scrabble? 


ELOHENU: God shouldn't play Serab- 
ble? 

Jarvis: Oh, forgive me, Lord! How 
presumptuous of me, mere dust that I 
am, to question even for a moment the 
fittingness of Thy playing Scrabble. Bur 
1 confess | could not have been more 
surprised if 1 had heard that Thou 
solvedest crossword puzzles. 

ELONENU: Put yourself 

Jarvis: In Thy holy place? No, n 

vLoMENU: Take today. First 1 solved 
the Times crossword puzzle. That's the 
Sunday one. The Sunday one is hard! 
(Trying to impress jarvis, but jarvis has 
never worked on a Sunday Times cross- 
word) It took me three hours. The Satur- 
day Review literary cryptogram and the 
Wit Twister I solved last week. This 
week's isn't here yet. (To kernas) Was 
there any mail? 1 don't like Double 
Crostics. Tonight there's a string quartet. 
Meanwhile, there are four hours to kill. 
Maybe 1 can get you a ticket. Do you 
like music? 

kernas: Wait, wait, he's not admitted 
yet. 

FLOHENU: So what should I do? Make 
more scenery? By the way, do you know 
the Alps? 

Jarvis: I've been there, yes. The Jung 
frau, the Matterhorn, Mont Blanc. 

ELOHENU: Nice, huh? I made them. 

KEPHAS: Of course you made them; 
everybody knows you made them. 

ELOHENU: I liked making the Alps. 1 
knew right away they would be good. 
Actually, mountain ranges are almost 
foolproof. But try making an interesting 
deser! Now, there's a challenge. I al- 
most succeeded in parts of Arizona. But 
the Sahara was a flop. Boy, was 1 
ashamed of the Sahara! I just went on 
and on for hundreds of miles, putting in 
sand, putting in sand. I don't know 
what I was thinking ol. 

XEPHAS: You Complain you're bored; 
why don't you do something about the 
Sahara? 

ELOHENU: Like what? 

xEPHAS: How should I know like what? 
That's your job. 

ELOHENU: Once I'm finished, I don't 
like to go back and—what's the word? 

KEPHAS: Potchky. 

ELOHENU: Not potchky. Are you kid- 
ding? Potchky isn't in amy dictionary, 1 
guarantee that! You try making potchky 
in Scrabble sometime and I'll hand you 
your head. Potchky! Anyway, there it 
I'm an unemployed scenery maker. I've 
been thinking of starting a new world, 
but I don't know. There doesn't seem to 
be any demand for one. 

Jarvis: But art Thou not concerned, 
O Lord, with the souls of men? 

ELOHENU: Me? People don't make deals 
th me about their souls; they make 
(continued on page 250) 


my place. 


“Oh, my goodness! Did I hit an erogenous zone?" 


135 


attire By ROBERT L. GREEN 


the definitive statement 
on coming trends 
in warm-weather wearwithal 


PLAYBOY'S 
SPEEN 
SUMMER 
FASHION 
FORECAST 


NOW THAT THE MERCURY is inching its way 
up the thermometer and old man winter 
is almost out the door, it's time we once 
again turned our attention to prognosti 
cating the male-fashion trends for the 
coming six months. The majority of suits, 
we foresee, will be shaped twobuttons 
with wide lapels and deep center vents— 
а look in which you may invest with con 
fidence, as it is now firmly entrenched as 
a contemporary classic. Lest you fear that 
you're going to be typed, we hasten to add 
that there will still Le plenty of oppor- 
tunity for you to express your individ. 

y by picking and choosing from 
the multiplicity of new fabrics, treat- 
ments and interesting color combinations 
— particularly plaids—that will soon be 
available. (text concluded on page 140) 


Left: Linen and wool blend 
ploid suit with pleoted trousers, 
by Polo, $210; embossed cotton 

shirt, by Bert Pulitzer, $20; 
polko-dot silk foulard tie, by Polo, 

$17.50; ond leather-and-suede shoes, 
by Brass Boot / Nunn-Bush, $43. 
Right; Dotted cotton 
single-breosted suit with 
peaked lopels, by Pierre Cordin, 
$110; polyester-and-cotton oxford 
weove shirt, by Gont, $12; and a 
medollion-pattemed polyester 
tie, by Prince Consort, $5. 


PRODUCED BY WALTER HOLMI 


Left; Hand-crocheted wool sweoter 
vest, by Lloyd Greenleof 
Designs, $20; multipatterned 
Avril-and-cotton Western shirt, 
by Impulse, $13; and pleated 
cotton slocks with double-strap 
buckle-front closures, 
by Mole Cosuols, $16. 


Below: Cotton-chintz holf-sleeved sofori suit with epaulets 
‘and four flop patch pockets, by Paul Ressler, $30; cotton knit 
round-necked pullover with lang sleeves, by Jantzen, $6; 
and a wide suede belt, by Canterbury, $8. 

Right: Plaid, brushed-cotton-denim jacket, by Viceroy 
Sportswear, $30; ribbed pullover, by Himalaya, $10; 

~brushed:-catton-denim stacks, by Impressions 
by M, $10; and o svede-appliquéd belt, by Canterbury, $10. 


In the pants department, slacks with 
a jeans cut w be the pre- 
dominant style, with corduroy, denim and 
embroidered denim the favored materials. 
We also predict that bl 
which you probably thought had per- 
manendy faded away—will return, u 
lored into slacks, sports jackets and even 

s. Another old standby, seersucker, 
will return to dominate this summer's 
fashions. But make no mistake—both 
fabrics will resemble the bleeding madras 
and seersucker styles of yesteryear in 
name only, with looks reflecting what's 
happening in 1972, not 1962. 

Unlike spring 1971, when we accurate- 
ly noted 0 there would be very little 
difference between dress and sport shirts, 
this year we predict some changes. Dress 
shirts will be quieting down somewhat, 
while casual shirts, frequently featuring 
а Western treatment, will be coming on 
stronger than ever in styles that are obvi- 
ously to be worn sans tie. (Ties, inci 
dentally, will continuc to stay wide; 
among the patterned silks, watch for some 
new textured fabrics, such as hand 
crocheted wool and homespun cotton.) 

Summing up, we sce the next six 
months as casually eclectic, with fabrics 
and patterns being matched—and mix- 
matched, provided the over-all effect is 
complementary rather than kookie. So 
it's shopward ho, gentlemen; spring and 
summer come but once a year 


Left: Patchwork cotton-velvet jacket, 
by Outer , $35; long- 
sleeved cotton-jersey pullover, by 
Michael Mileo / Peter Sinclair, $7.50; 
cotton-denim jeans, by Male Casuols, 
$9; leother belt, by Canterbury, 

$12; ond brushed. 
oxfords, by Hush Puppi: 
Right: Potriotically s 
polyester sports jacket with o 
deep center vent, by Hospel Brothers, 
$55; obstract-print Arnel-ond- 
nylon shirt, by Creighton, $14; 
brushed-cotton jeans with 
soddlebog pockets, by H. D. Lee, 
$9.50; and kid shoes, by Verde, $28. 
Far right: Potchwork seersucker 
shirt of polyester/Avril blend 
with flop potch breost pockets, by 
Impulse, $15; brushed-cotton-denim 
flored-leg slocks, by Levi's 
Jeans, $8.50; cotton web belt, by 
Paris, $7; and loofers with bross 
decoration, by Bostonion, $35. 


y ZA 


| WES 2 —f | 
Л ) 3 c ااا‎ 
=, й 
| =e AIVA 


Right: Chamais beach outfit includes 
ЕЯ û halfsleeved cordigan top 
with zip front and two patch pockets 
ond matching bikini trunks 
with zip fly, by Rafoel, $120. 
Center: Flox-cottan sailor jacket 
with cantresting stitching ond 
zip patch pockets, $37, is worn 
aver catton-twill slocks, $15, 
bath by Jupiter of Paris. 
Far right: Indian-print cotton 
shorts with belt loops and pockets, 
by Brentwoad Sportswear, $5; and o 
long-sleeved silk/Fortrel-polyester 
sweater, by McGregor, $20. 


ho aaa 


THE 
TERMINAL 
MAN 


Part two of a new novel 


By MICHAEL CRICHTON 


SYNOPSIS: On March 9, 1971, a hand- 
cuffed man under police guard was ad. 
mitted lo University Hospital in Los 
Angeles; his name was Harold Benson. 
He was a brilliant computer expert who 
was about to undergo a radical апа ex- 
perimental brain operation. The two sur- 
geons on his case, Drs. John Ellis and 
Robert Morris, were believers, convinced 
that their new technological medicine 
could salvage a damaged brain. Dr. Janet 
Ross, the young psychiatrist on the case, 
was profoundly doubtful. 

Benson's problem was psychomotor 
epilepsy, which evidently had resulted 
from a freeway accident. two years earlier 
About six months ает the accident, he 
had begun to suffer blackouts that were 
presaged by a sensation of a nauseous 
odor. Coming back to consciousness, Ben 
son would discover cuts and bruises and 
torn clothes, as if he had been fighting. 
In recent months, he had been accused of 
beating up an airplane mechanic, a top 
less dancer and—most seriously—a gas 
station attendant. 

Drug trials had shown that Benson 
could not be helped by that means; his 
epilepsy was drug-resistant. Finally, he 
was scheduled jor а stage-three surgical 
procedure—the first of its kind ever to 
be performed on a human being. Forty 
electrodes would be implanted їп his 
brain. They would be connected to a 
highly miniaturized plutonium- powered 
computer implanted in his neck. The 
liny computer, like а heart pacemaker, 
would predict ап imminent epileptic 
attack and then would send a soothing 
and restraining electric impulse to Ben- 
son's brain, All of this would be moni. 
tored on a large computer in the hospital. 

Janet Ross's doubts were based on the 
fact that she had learned that in the 
course of his computer work, Benson had 
formed the delusion that machines would 
ultimately take over the world. “If you 
start putting wires in his head,” she 
argued, "he's going to feel that he's been 


turned into a machine” However, Dr. 
Roger McPherson, head of the NPS—the 


Neuropsychiatric Research Unit—was so 
eager to try the history-making operation 
that he disregarded her warning and gave 
the go-ahead. 

On the eve of the operation, Angela 


ILLUSTRATION BY RON BRAOFORO 


Black, a young dancer who knew Benson, 
came to the hospital with some of his 
personal effects, mcluding a black wig to 
cover his shaved and bandaged head. 

The operation went smoothly, accord- 
ing to plan. But afterward, even McPher- 
son was bothered by the philosophical 
implications of what his staf] had done. 
“We have created п who is опе 
single, large, complex computer termi 
nal,” he reflected. And his confidence was 
not improved as he waiched a video tape 
of a presurgery interview in which Benson 
erupted his phobia: "1 hate them, particu 
larly the prostitutes. Airplane mechanics, 
dancers, translatars, gas-station attendants, 
the people who ате machines or who serv 
ice machines. .. . 1 hale them all.” 


man 


ту 


AT SIX PM 
ıo the sev 
tient. Room 710 was quiet a 
in reddish light from the setting sı 
Benson appeared to be asleep. but his 
eyes opened when McPherson closed 
the door. 

"How are you feeling?” McPherson 
asked, moving close to the bed. 

Benson smiled. ryone 
know that,” he said. 

McPherson. smiled | 
question. 

"Um tired, that’s all. Very tired. 
Sometimes I think I'm a ticking time 
bomb and you're wondering when I'll 
explode." 

“Is that what you thin 
asked. Automatically, he 
son's covers so he could look at the LV 
line. It was flowing nicely 

"licktick" Benson said. closing his 
еуез agai icktick.” 

McPherson frowned. 
tomed 10 mechanical metaphors from 
Benson—the man was preoccupied, after 
all, with the idea of men as machines, But 
to have them appear so soon after opera- 


Roger McPherson went up 


wants to 


k 


t's а natural 


P" McPherson 
adjusted. Ben 


He was accu: 


"None. A 
like Га fallen 
was the bone p. 
succumbed 10 the process of being turned 
into a mach He opened his eyes and 

ed again. "Or a time bomb. 
Any smells? Strange sensations?” As he 
asked, McPherson looked ar the EL 
scanner above the bed. It was still reading 


che behind my ear. 
McPherson kne 


it had become a critical question: was the computer running the patient or was the patient running the computer? 


145 


PLAYBOY 


146 


“No. Nothi 
“But you feel as if you might explode 
He thought: Ross should really be asking 
these questions. 
rt of," Benson said. “lı 
r, we may all explode. 
How do you mean?" 
"In the coming war between men and 
machines. The human brain is obsolete, 
you sec. It has gone as far as it is going to 
go. It’s exhausted, so it has spawned the 
next generation of intelligent forms. They 
will.. ей?” He closed 
his eyes again. “A minor procedure.” he 
said and smiled with his eyes closed. A 
moment later, he was snoring. 
McPherson remained by the bed for a 
moment, then turned to the window and 
watched the sun set over the Pacific. Ben- 
son had a nice room; you could see a bit 
of the ocean between the high-rise apart- 
ments at Santa Monica. He remained 
there for several minutes. Benson did not 
Hy, McPherson went out to 


the coming 


why am I so 


the chart. 


“Patient alert, responsive, oriented 
times three." He paused after writing 
that. He didn't really know if Benson 
was oriented to person, place and time; 
he hadn't checked specifically. But he 
clear responsi d Me 
Pherson let it go. “Flow of ideas orderly 
and clear, but patient ret 
imagery ol preoperative state. It is too 
rly to be certain, but it appears that 
predictions have correctly indicated that 
the operation would not alter his menta- 
tion between seizures." Signed, Roger А. 
McPherson, M. D. 

He stared at it for а moment, then 
dosed the chart and replaced it on the 
shelf. It was a good note—cool, direct, 
holding out no false anticipations. The 
1 document, after all, and 


wa and 


ns machine 


son didn't expect to see. Benson's chart 
court, but you couldn't be too care- 
ful. He believed very strongly in appear- 
ances—and he felt it was his job to do so. 

He looked at the row of charts on the 
shelf, a row of unfamiliar names, into 
which велзох, н. F. 710 merged. indistin- 
guishably. In one sense, he thought, 
Benson was correct—he was a 
time bomb. A man treated with mind- 
control technology was subject to all 
sors of irrational public prejudice. 
Heart control in the form of cardiac 
pacemakers was considered a wonderful 
invention; kidney control through drugs 
was a blessing. But mind control was 
evil, a disaster—although the NPS con- 
trol work was directly analogous to 
control work with other organs. Eve 
the technology was similar: The atomic 
pacemaker they were using һай been 


developed first for heart work. But the 
prejudice remained. 

McPherson sighed, took out the chart 
again and flipped to the section con 
taining doctors’ orders. Both Ellis and 
Morris had writen postop-care orders. 
McPherson added: "After interfacing to- 
morrow aM., begin Thorazine 

As he left the floor, he thought that 
he would rest more easily once Benson 
was on Thorazine. Perhaps they couldn't 
defuse the time bomb—but they could 
drop it into a bucket of cold water 


M 


Late at night, in Telecomp, Gerhard 
stared irritably at the computer console. 
He typed in more instructions, then 
ked to a printout typewriter and 
began reviewing the long sheaf of 
green-siriped sheets. He scanned them 
quickly, looking for the error he knew was 
there, in the programmed i 

The computer itself r 
mistake. Gerhard had used them for 
nearly ten years—different computers, 
different places—and he had never seen 
one make a mistake. Of course, akes 
occurred all the time, but they were 
always in the program, never in the 
machine. 

Richards came in, shrugging off a 
sports coat, pouring himself a cup of 
coffee. " How's it going?" 

Gerhard shook his head. "I'm having 
trouble with George." 

Again? Shit.” Richards looked at the 
console. "How's Martha?" 

“Martha's fine, I think. It’s just Saint 


corge. 
Richards sipped 


actions, 


ver made a 


is coffee and sat 
down at the console. “Mind if I try it?” 
He began flicking buuons, calling up 
the program for Saint George. Then he 
called up the program for Martha. Then 
he pushed the interaction button. 

Richards and Gerhard hadn't. devised 
these programs: they had been modified 
from several existing computer programs 
developed at other universities. But the 
basic idea was the same—to create a 
computer program that would make the 
computers act emotionally, as if they 
were people. It was logical to label the 
programs with names like George and 
Martha. There was a precedent for that: 
Eliza in Boston and Aldous in England. 

George and Martha were essentially 
the same program with slight difler- 
ences. The original George was pro- 
grammed to be neutral in his responses 
to stimuli. Then Martha was created. 
Martha was a little bitchy; she disliked 
most things. Finally, another George w 
formulated, a very loving George, who 
was referred to as Saint George. 

Each program could respond with 
three emotional stares—love, fear and 
anger. Each could produce three actions 


—approach, withdrawal and auack. All 
this was, of course, highly abstract. [t 
was carried out in terms of numbers. 
For example, the original George w: 
neutral to most numbers, but he 
liked the number 751. He was pro- 
grammed to dislike it, And, by extensio 
he disliked similar numbers—743, 772, 
and so om. He much preferred num- 
bers such as 133, 404 and 918. If 
you punched in one of these. G 
responded with numbers signifying love 
and approach, If you punched in 707, 
he withdrew. If you punched in 750, 
George angrily attacked—as shown by 
the numbers he printed out. 

The NPS staff had played with the 
programs in this way for a long time, 
Then it had incorporated program mod- 
ifications to allow for "talk" from the 
computer. The numbers were translated 
into sentences. This was amusing 
revealing, The actual interaction 
referred to as the Chrisunas game, be- 
cause most of it was conducted as giving 
and receiving gifts—objects that had an 
assigned or learned emotional valuc, just 
as the numbers did. 

Normal George interacting with Mar- 
tha would eventually win her over and 


her bitchiness would recede into the 
background. 
But Saint George had a much worse 


effect on her. loving accepi 
drove her up the wall. That is, if things 
were working normally. Richards watched 
as the printout flashed across the screen 


HELLO, I'M SAINT GEORGE 

HELLO 

WHAT IS YOUR NAME? 

MARTHA 

YOU DON'T SAY MUCH, MARTHA. 

ко 

BUT I LIKE YOU 

WHY, I DON'T LIKE YOU 

Т UNDERSTAND THAT. HOW CAN I HELP? 

“It isn't printing periods consistently," 
Richards said. "When did that start?” 

"Thats nothing," Gerhard said. “Just 
keep watching.” 

HELP? 

YES, 1 WOULD LIKE TO HELP YOU. 

HAVE А САТ. 


Richards winced. Cats were something 
that both George and Martha were pro- 
grammed to dislike. Giving George a cat 
was a very hostile move. 


THANK YOU 
HAVE ANOTHER CAT. 

‘THANK YOU, YOU ARE VERY KIND. 
HAVE ANOTHER CAT. 

NO THANK YOU. 

YOU LIKE CATS? 

BUT 1 HAVE ENOUGH CATS. 
HAVE A GORILLA. 


id. "What 


"Really nasty,” Richards 
are the other interactions like?" 
(continued on page 168) 


TAKING get 225,000 counterculturists to settle in the green mountain state and 


exercise their franchise — and you've begun a unique social experiment 


OVER SUPPOSE THE NATION'S alienated young decided to stage a take-over of Vermont. 
VERMONT Not by staging a weekend 10ck festival at Rutland and then hanging around 
the Green Mountains like freaked-out trolls. Not by lacing the water supply 
with assorted chemical brain scramblers. Not even by trashing the 14-kt.-gold-leaf 
dome off the Statehouse in Montpelier. Suppose they decided to do it by the 
book, within the system, the hard-hat-approved American way—by ballot 
Consider the arithmetic. The 1970 census counts 444,732 bona-fide residents 
К of the state of Vermont. Of that number, only 287,575 are 18 years old or over 
article and thus eligible by state law to vote in state and local elections. Since 107,527 of 
By RICHARD POLLAK these eligibles are between the ages of 18 and 34 and, figuring conservatively, 


147 


148 


one third of ihem (85,806) would be likely to sit 
down and break grass with all incoming pilgrims, 
the potential enemy strength reduces to 250,000. Lop 
olf another ten or so percent for those good citizen 
who wouldn't bother to exercise their franchise, even 
at the prospect of a Yippie governor, and the numeri- 
cal tipping point comes down to 225,000, give or take 
a Yankee. Hardly а boggling number in a country 
whose mobile counterculture routinely mustered twice 
that and more for the peace rallies and musical be-ins 
of the late Sixties and whose 18-34 population now 
totals more than 40,000,000, the majority within an 
easy hitchhike of what the Vermont tourist office likes 
to call “the beckoning country. 
"You mean," says one Vermonter privy to these 
rudimentary calculations, "that some sort of latter-day 
Children's Crusade might simply march into this state 
and take it away from us? Preposterous. First of all, 
we'd never let 'em. But it wouldn't ever come to that, 
because they'd never be able to put it together. How 
would they live? What would they do for jobs? What 
about housing? Our winters, you know, aren't. exactly 
tropical. The whole notion's ridiculous." Maybe so. 
Then again, in a nation roiling with people in search 
of an alternative to the bankrupt politics of the past, 
the notion of their own state may be less political 
science fiction than it seems. Already, in fact, a pair of 
founding fathers have given the idea its own radical 
“Federalist. Papers" The document is "Jamestown 
Seventy,” a littlenoted treatise written by James Е. 
Blumstein and James Phelan, two young visionaries 
out of Yale Law School. "What we advocate,” they 
write, with a calm that suggests nothing more is at 
stake than a change in library hours, "is the migration 
of large numbers of people to a single state for the 
express purpose of effecting the peaceful political 
take-over of that state through the elective process. 
Blumstein and Phelan are as serious as were Tom 
Paine and Patrick Henry, if a bit more prolix. Yet 
they are anything but revolutionaries. Blumstein, who 
was graduated from Yale in 1970, now teaches at the 
Vanderbilt University School of Law and is associate 
director of its Ford Foundation-funded Urban and 
Regional Development Center. Phelan recently re- 
sumed his quest for а law degree at Yale, following a 
tour in Delaware inspecting the Du Ponts with а 
band of Nader's Raiders and producing a major study 
of the corporation. They drew up "Jamestown Seven- 
ty” because, like anyone not in a coma in recent 
years, they see the United States foundering in a sea 
of conventional wisdom and unresponsive institutions. 
To their elders who would cling to these anachro- 
nisms and to their peers who would meet the problem 
by blowing up the General Motors Building, they say: 
“The short answer to all this—revolution—is im- 
possible when armed revolt by the citizenry at large 
would inevitably be put down by the military might 
at the disposal of those in control. We see the best 
way out in rededicating this nation to its heritage: 
reopening the frontier, where alienated or ‘deviant’ 
members of society can go to live by their new ideas; 
providing a living laboratory for social experiment 
through radical Federalism; and restoring effective 
political communication in a multimedia society. 
The goal of this takeover would be to establish a 


truly experimental society in which new solutions to 
today's problems could be tried, an experimental state 
which would serve as a new frontier and encourage 
imaginative local innovation [and], by its example, spur 
change in society as a whole: 

While Vermonters oil up their muskets and contem- 
plate reactivating the Green Mountain boys, some 
history is in order. Most of it is elementary and 
squarely in Blumstein and Phelan's corner. From the 
beginning at Jamestown, Virginia, in 1607, dissent 
and innovation were commonplace in pre-Revolution 
America: rickety democracy in Massachusetts under 
the Mayflower Compact, rare religious toleration їп 
Rhode Island, friendly persuasion among the Quakers 
in Pennsylvania. And in the years leading up to the 
ar, the colonies became a major testing ground for 
the iconoclastic ideas and ideologies of the Enlight- 
enment of 18th Century Europe, resulting in the then- 
altogether-radical notion that, as Thomas Jefferson 
put it, “all men are created equal, that they are en- 
dowed by their Creator with certain unalienable 
Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the 
Pursuit of Happiness, 

Arguing that contemporary America precludes the 
pursuit of happiness for thousands of citizens, young 
and old, the authors summon half a dozen expert 
witnesses in support of their case for an experimental 
state. There is historian Frederick Jackson Turner 
reiterating his familiar thesis that "American social 
development has been continually beginning over 
again on the frontier," Supreme Court Justice Oliver 
Wendell Holmes stressing the need for "social experi- 
ments that an important part of the community 
desires, in the insulated chambers afforded by the 
several states," and Yale psychologist Kenneth Kenis- 
ton (author of The Uncommitted: Alienated Youth 
in American Society) insisting that “Without at least 
some men and women sufficiently alienated to chal- 
lenge the established order . . . no social innovation 
is possible" and maintaining that the "cultivation of 
and tolerance for alienation. at least in some indi- 
viduals, is a prerequisite for any major social im- 
provement." These testimonials may seem like radical 
abstractions. In fact, however, they jibe neatly with the 
essentially conservative Realpolitik of the Seventies: 
the growing disenchanunent with New Deal-spawned 
centralization and the "widespread feeling in the 
country today that government. must be returned to 
the people. 

Experimental communities, of course, are. nothing 
new to the United States. In the 19th Century, 
hundreds of Americans deplored one or another as- 
pect of the system and went off to do their own thing. 
Encouraged by cheap land and the search for toler- 
ance, dozens of sects established thriving farm colo- 
nies, such as the many Shaker enclaves east of the 
Mississippi and the Harmonist villages of New Har- 
mony, Indiana, and Economy, Pennsylvania. Some of 
these settlements survived several decades and one— 
the Mormons in Utah—grew into a major force in its 
state. But for the most part, the religious separatist 
movements disintegrated under the homogenizing 
wheels of industri: ess. 

More significant, secular breakaways proved even less 
successful. In the middle 1800s, followers of Welsh 


“For Grissakes, Harvey! You want lo make my wife neurotic?” 


149 


PLAYBOY 


150 


social philosopher Robert Owen and 
French utopian socialist Charles Fourier 
eagerly set up some 50 communities in 
h to pursue Humanism and eschew 
capitalism. Most were singularly short- 
lived, folding after a (ew days when high- 
minded idealism came up against the 
rigors of communal life. Nathaniel Haw- 
thorne dropped out of Brook Farm after 
six months, complaining that he could 
o writing done. Six years after it 
ed for business in 1841, the promi- 
nent haven for Massachusetts intellee- 
tuals had "faded, flickered, died down 
and expired.” Such discouraging prece- 
dents by no means dismay Blumstein and 
Phelan. On the contrary, they maintain 
that Brook Farm and its like were 
bound to fail—as are their counterparts 
now poking up around the country—be- 
cause “provisions for the institutional- 
ization of continuing experiment . . . are 
lacking, as are ties to the larger society. 

So, Vermont: where ties to the larger 
society have existed since it ratified the 
U.S. Constitution in 1791; where offices 
Ше for the institutionalization of 
continuing experiment include a gover- 
norship and lieutenant governorship, one 
House seat and two Senate seats in the 
U.S. Congress, 150 house seats and 30 
senate seats in the state general as 
sembly and scores of lesser posts; where 
the motto is "Freedom and Unity"; and 
where, as the authors put it in their 
most splendid understatement, "one can 
safely assume that the local population 
would have strong feelings on what was 
happening.” 

Already, the natives are restless. In 
the past few years, Vermont has become 
the dropout mecca of the Northeastern 
U.S. "Everybody wants to come here 
and the tend is growing,” says Norman 
Runnion, managing editor of The Brat- 
tleboro Daily Reformer. “1 get five job 
applications a week myself." What makes 
Vermonters edgy, though, is not the in- 
flux of city-sated newspaperinen but the 
commune movement. No more than a 
few dozen settlements operate in the 
state, but they are having their impact 
and the Microbuses keep coming. Just 
down the road from Rudolf Ser 
place in Guilford, for example, 
Packers Corner Commune. Now 
fourth усаг, this well-organized precinct 
is firmly established on more than 100 
acres of deeded land. Up against the 
Canadian border near Island Pond, 
Farth Peoples Park, Inc, has purchased 
594 acres. And at the Cambridge (Massa- 
chusetts) Institute, a kind of counter- 
institutional think-tank, ideas have been 
circulating concerning the establis 
of a new city "in which communal living 
relationships would be central." If fund- 
ing had been available, the institute was 
interested in acquiring land, possibly in 


Maine. Just as possibly in Vermont 
“There's a good deal of vigilante talk 
hereabouts these days,” says one long- 
time Vermonter. “So far it’s just talk, but 
if those unwashed troublemakers keep 
coming, well be ready." Blumstein and 
Phelan acknowledge the potential ex- 
plosiveness: “The first great test of the 
experimental program will be the safe- 
guarding of the rights of the indigenous 
population.” 

hort of violence. of course. am 
ganized movement to update Vermont 
would quickly come up against a volley 
of legal buckshot. The Federal Constitu 
tion may protect the invaders’ basic 
rights, but a governor and an inventive 
attorney general could create an assort- 
ment of frustrating hurdles anyway. For 
openers, they could summon a willing 
legislature into emergency session and 
kly extend the state's new, liberal 
dency requirement of 90 days in 
state-wide elections, putting the voting 
booth off limits to all newcomers for 
three years. Or five. Or ten. Though 
such a tactic clearly would be prejudi- 
cial, the U.S. Supreme Court has yet to 
rule on what, if anything, constitutes 
fair and reasonable state and local resi- 
dency periods; thus, the new law would 
stand as an impediment until the Court 
rules, which it may during the current 
session. Suits challenging residency laws, 
however, have been filed and won in a 
number of states, among them Tennes- 
see, where the plaintiff was none other 
than Jim Blumstein. Blumstein says that 
he filed his suit to vindicate his personal 

ivil rights, not as a first step toward 
implementing “Jamestown Seventy.” “But 
when one of my colleagues heard about 
the suit after reading the treatise, he 
running to the associate dean, 
"Look what we just hired, 
n recalled not long ago. “I told 
them not to worry about an attempted 
takeover of Tennessee, because the pop- 
ulation [3,923,687] is too large. 

Beyond extension of residency rc- 
quirements, Blumstein and Phelan con 
cede any number of other obstacles to 
their goal. I the new pioneers appeared 
on the verge of gaining the upper hand 
in, say, Franklin County, the general 
assembly in Montpelier could rearrange 
the boundaries and gerrymander the 
threat away. Or, for that matter, it 
could abolish counties and townships 


went 


altogether and require all candidates for 
the general assembly to run at large. In 
addition, the could consolidate 


their power by making key elective posts 
appointive and by requiring that all 
new legislation be passed by a four-fifths 
majority, Obviously, some of these ploys 
are of dubious constitutionality and 
open to attack in the courts. But legal 
redress in many cases would take several 


years. Vermont straights could keep the 
heat on their would-be liberators, mean. 
while, with an endless variety of lesser 
harassments—from unreasonably strin 
gent health regulations for communes to 
arbitrary denial of admission to the bar, 
to the refusal of indigenous physicians 
to treat the ills of newcomers (whose 
own doctors would e been denied 
licenses to practice medicine in the statc). 

Despite the catalog of formidable 
obstacles available to the Vermont estab- 
lishment, Blumstein and Phelan are con 
fident of success over the long run. They 
insist in their blueprint that "give 
time perspective of ten years (though 
the ie could be considerably shorter), 
it’s entirely possible that enough disen 
chanted, idealistic, adventurous and cre- 
ative people would accept the challenge 
of resettling in a single "frontier" state. 
especially once the word was out that a 
movement was on 


Summer 1976. With headquarters on 
Main Street in Montpelier, a nationwide 
Mobilization to Open Vermont for Ex- 
perimentation (MOVE) has brought 
more than 125,000 newcomers to the 
state. And in many arcas, these Movers 
—as the pioneers call themselves—now 
hold the balance of power. The first 
to fall was Bennington County in No 
vember 1974, after the Supreme Court 
extended the Federal 30-da 
maximum to state 
and only 18 months after 750 of the 
participants in a National Conference 
on Women's Liberation а! Bennington 
College decided to stay on and organize 
the country’s first female-dominated po 
itical unit, now called Steinem County. 
Encouraged by the ladies’ stunningly 
swift coup (made possible in no small 
part by the enthusiastic support of 
until-then-quiescent Vermont housewives), 
other groups staked out and renamed 
claims. Windsor became Hoffman County 
as the irrepressible Abbie and thousands 
of his Yippie followers re-established the 
Woodstock Nation in Woodstock, Ver 
mont. More than 800 former Raiders 
their familics became form: 
with either permanent or summer homes 
in Nader (nee Essex) County. In neigh 
) County. 
ng, middle-class black fami 


d 


residents 


Of 
smoothly. 
tried to start a colony in Wilkins Coun 


course, not 
When 


everything went 
the Bi hers 


ty a harmoniously integrated gang of 
night riders drove them away in the 
nowánfamous Torching at Little Hos 
mer Pond. Similar hostility greeted the 
Panthers and other black militants when 
they sought to put down roots in other 
areas and for months they wandered the 
state until a generous endowment from 

(continued on page 213) 


le, 50 pairs of 
pany credo, which 


PLAYBOY 


they shouted at the top of their lungs: 
"Work Hard! Work Quickly! Be Precisel 
Smile! 

Kunio Inoue, a young Japanese bro- 
ker and my companion-translator, was 
visibly shaken. "I've never seen anything 
like this before," he gasped softly, wip- 
ng his forehead with a fresh handker- 
chief. The Berkeley-educated Inoue knew 
that most Japanese companies had some 
kind of ritual that accompanied their 
day's work: five or ten minutes of group 
exercise in the morning, recitation of the 
days work objectives, an afternoon tea 
ceremony or singing of the company song. 
But what we found that morning at Yoro- 
notaki both shocked and frightened him, 
as it did me. It wasn't a 
way of life—a vivid exercise in Orwellian 
group-think. 

1 had heard from a Japanese journal- 
ist friend that the secret of Yoronotaki's 
success might be its unusual methods 
of operation, employee relationships and 
corporate philosophy. He refused to say 
anything more, except that I should go 
and see it for myself. It all sounded 
rather mysterious, so 1 went. 

I arrived at Yoronotaki's corporate 
offices for my appointment. promptly at 
8:30 that morning and I was warmly 
greeted by Itsumi Ueda, managing direc- 
tor. A man in his carly 40s, Ucda had 
been around enough Westerners to know 
that they traditionally shake hands but 
was enough of a Japanese to bow almost 
routinely. Not knowing quite what to do 
myself, we compromised, bowing politely 
to each other and shaking hands on the 
way down. 

There was something else distinctive 
about Ueda. He was a three-star general. 
Not a real one, of course. But Yorono- 
taki, it turned out, is organized and run 
from top to bottom in the military fash- 
ion. All employees, from the waitresses 
who work in the franchised outlets to 
the top management people, wear a small, 
olivegreen old-imperial-army pin with 
their name and rank inscribed on it. 
There are 40 ranks, from private to three- 
star general, Ueda told me proudly. 

A twominute-warning bell sounded 
at 8:43 A.M. Papers were shuffled and 
desk drawers slammed shut as the office 
workers cleared their desks and made 
last-minute preparations for the morn- 
m. Exactly two minutes lat- 
er, a second bell rang and everyone 
quickly fell into two evenly spaced ranks 
of 25 each. Facing them was a solemn. 
faced section head who quickly barked 
out orders like a Marine drill instructor. 

“Attention!” snapped the D.1. Fifty 
bodies sprang to attention with a sharp 
click of heels. Roll was called and each 
employee acknowledged his or her name 
with a crisp, staccato “Hai!” ("Yest"). The 
orders of Ше day were read, followed by 
words of encouragement, “This company 


152 will shine in the history of Japan because 


of what it does. It is up to us to provide 
the kind of leadership to make our fami- 
ies happy, our company grow and our 
country flourish.” And, with a furtive 
glance over to where I was standing, he 
added, “The whole world is watching you.” 
About ten minutes later, after a series 
of rousing pep talks by various section 
chiefs, the morning ceremony came to a 
close with a chorus of the company song. 
led by a young fellow who stood with 
his feet apart, back arched, right hand 
on hip and his left holding an old samu- 
sword, which he pumped up and down 
in rhythm with the martial beat of 
the song. Then, before you could say 
“Banzail,” it was over as suddenly as it 
started. The dismissed "soldiers" scam- 
pered back to their desks to mull over 
new ways to sell more sake and sukiyaki 
for the honor and glory of Yoronotaki. 
Later, over a quiet cup of tea, the 
company’s founder, Tokichiro Kinoshita, 
explained the reasons for all this. Toki 
chiro Kinoshita is not his real name 
but that of a famous samurai warrior- 
tuler who united Japan 400 years ago, 
invaded Korea and had dreams of со 
quering Asia and Europe before being 
driven off the mainland by the Mongols. 
Only a few close friends and associates 
even know the founder's real name or 
true identity. Moreover, he and most 
Yoronotaki executives embrace the rel 
gious philosophy of Soka Gakkai, an 
aggressive Buddhist sect dedicated to 
hard work, success and achievement— 
concepts deeply rooted in the Japanese 
character, 
“We believe the mi 
best way to i 


ary system is the 
astill discipline and a sense 
of dedication in our employees,” said 
Kinoshita. "In a sense, we are like Japan 
itself. Small, isolated from the rest of the 
world for centuries, we must unite to 
achieve a common goal. We must act as 
one if we are to grow and prosper.” 

Grow and prosper. Unite to win 
That's what Japan is all about. 

But it wasn't too long ago that MADE IN 
JAPAN meant a tendollar transistor ra- 
dio, a plastic gun that broke when you 
dropped it, a doll whose eyes never 
seemed to look in me direction, 
ays coming un- 
tracked or any one of the hundreds of 
cheap items, trinkets and gadgets that 
flooded the American market. Japa 
nese companies begged, borrowed and 
bought everything they could to put 
them on a competitive footing with U.S. 
companies. They even tried to steal 
Coke; one company peddled a soft drink 
it called Nippon Cola, packaged in bot 
Чез identical to those of Coca-Cola, until 
a Japanese court stopped it. 

Now, however, those three little words 
—MADE IN JAPAN—have become a sym 
bol of Nippon's burgeoning economi 
might and technological progress. © 
many, already far behind Japan in steel 


production and shipbuilding (Japan 
turns out half the world’s annual ton 
age), will possibly drop to third place 


in automobile production this year. Simi 
larly, 30 percent of all foreign electrical 
goods sold in the U. S. ten years ago came 
from West Germany. Today, 50 percent 
are Japanese made and the German sharc 
has sunk to six percent. The success of 
Nikon cameras also has the Germans 
drooling. In the U.S., increasing numbers 
of Toyotas, Datsuns and Colts оп the 
highways have forced Detroit to counter. 
attack with its own small economy models. 
Even so, Nissan Motors, the Datsun 
maker, is considering opening a small- 
carassembly plant on the U.S. West 
Coast. Manufacturers of Japanese calcu 
lators own more than half the U.S. mar- 
ket for such items. And the Japanese are 
already selling computers to the United 
States that were made in Japanese fac- 
tories with Japanese technology, in- 
dependent of IBM or any other foreign 
manufacturer 

Despite the ten-percent surcharge 
tacked onto U.S. imports by the Nixon 
Administration from last August to De- 
cember, the excess of Japanese imports 
over U.S. exports to Japan in 1971 is 
believed to have nearly doubled the 
previous year's staggering 1.4-billion- 
dollar trade deficit, the biggest ever for 
апу country. What's more, as America 
withdraws from Vieu 
are quietly moving i 
two years, Japan has extended more than 
$25,000,000 in economic aid and has 
invested $8,000,000 in private capital 
South Vietnam. Half a million Hondas, 
Yamahas and Suzukis purr along South 
Vietnamese roads, and Sony radios are 
everywhere. Vietnam is said, in fact, to 
have a "Honda economy." And in other 
parts of Asia, they refer to the enter- 
prising Japanese businessmen as “the ugly 
“the yellow Americans. 
‚ Japan has achieved through 
industry, trade and a rock-hard currency 
what guns and generals failed to win 
ing World War Two. That old 
t dream of a Greater East Asi 
Co-Prosperity Sphere stretching from 
Manchuria to Burma appears modest by 
aurrent-day realizations. Some Western 
economists are still predicting that Japan, 
already number two in the free world 
with a gross product. exceeding. 
200 billion dollars, will have the world's 
biggest economy by the end of this 
century. 

But Japan's claim to the next century 
may be premature, Nippon is currently 
in the throes of a serious economic reces- 
sion; business is stagnant and is likely to 
remain so for most of 1972. Some 15,000. 
companies, most of them small, family- 
owned subcontractors of large manufac 
turing firms, went bankrupt in 1971, 
and the number is groi 


du 


the talented miss bolling j 
talks about life, love and me 0--- 
Spiritual creativity > 
f 4 
29 \ 
| \ 
; \ 
) & 
| Y \ i 
d ' 


PHOTOGRAPHY BY MARIO CASILLI 


st year's The Marriage of a Young 
L Stockbroker, starring Richard 
Benjamin (above) as a voyeur, was greeted 
by ncar-universal apathy—with one 
bright exception: Tiffany Bolling, 

a smoldering newcomer who, the critics 
agreed, was just about the only good 

thing in the film. Tiffany's name is the 
enuine article, not a marquee monicker. 
Mother thought I'd be a boy, so she 
t have a girl's name picked. She got 
any out of a jewelry ad in the paper 
she was reading at the hospital." 
Tiffany, now 25, started singing in 
coffechouses at 16; she still sings, and 

the Thank God the War Is Over cut from 

her album Tifjany was considered for 

a my nomination. At 20, she got 

her fi ovie role, a bit in the 1967 

film Tony Rome, starring Frank Sinatra 

154 —with whom, incidentally, she's been 


linked in the gossip columns in recent 
months. (Tiffany's version: “I've known 
Francis for a long time, and I love him 
dearly, but 1 don't see him often.) 
levision viewers will recall Tiffany 
from guest shots on numerous shows— 
most recently The Bold Ones- а 
as a regular in ABC's short-lived series 
The New People. We got Tiffany 

to talk about her life and her wor 
Sample observations: On her career—"I'd 
like to be in the category of a Vanessa 
Redgrave or a Grace Kelly, but maybe 
a bit more earthy.” On love—"I'm a 
romanticist. 1 believe in courting. If 
a man and a woman just ball 1 

they never get into each other's тіп 

On women's lib—"I love being а woman 
and I've never really felt put down. But 


I do think men have been uptight 

h women; they tend to say. ‘OK, you 

just be quiet and serve me." On youth— 

Young people are underdogs. First 

they re told, ‘Shut up, you're just a kid." 

Then they're told, ‘Get out there and 

do what you're supposed to do’; but by 
then they don't really know what that is. 
On religion—"I'm not a Jesus freak or 

ng, but all my life I've had 


kind of god within. Not a wrathful, 
puritanical god who goes after sinners, 
because I definitely believe in pleasure, in 
the sensuality of being.” And we get a 

lot of good old-fashioned sensual 

sure out of looking at 

iteous Miss Bolling. 


эш. 
is цаз нү MON, 


7419 SVOuVA JHL 


the clever daughter ‘rom Viddishe Folksmaisses 


A NOBLEMAN had three Jewish tenants 
on his estate. One held the forest conces- 
sion: another operated the mill; the 
third—and poorest—kept the inn, 

One day the nobleman summoned all 
three before him and said, “I'm going to 
k you three questions: Which is th 
t thing in the world? Which is 
the fauest? Which is the dearest? 
Whoever answers these questions cor- 
rectly will not pay any rent lor ten 
years. And whoever fails to give me the 
correct answers will be banished from 
estate.” 


The forester and the miller did 
very long before they decided be 
tween them to give the following a 
swers “The swiftest is the nobleman's 
horse, the fattest is the nobleman’s pigs 
and the dearest is the nobleman's wile.” 

The poor innkeeper, however, went 
home feeling very worried. There was 
only three days’ time before he must 
answer the nobleman's questions. He 
racked his brains. 

Now. the innkeeper had a da 


who was very pretty, with bountiful 
breasts, a dimpled bottom and a clever 
wit. 

“What is we so, Father?” 
she asked. 


So he told 1 
three quest 

“Гуе thought and thought, but I c 
not find the answers?" he cried. 

“This is norhing to worry about, 
ther,” she told him. “The questions are 
very easy: The swiftest thing in the 
world is thought. the fattest is the earth, 
the dearest is sex." 

When the three days had. elapsed, the 
three Jewish tenants went to sce the 
"downer. Pretentiously. the first two 
gave the answers they һай agreed. upon, 
believing he would feel fauered by 
the 

“Wrong!” aied the nobleman, “Now 
pack up and leave my estate 
ever come hack! 

But when he listened to the innkecp- 

nswers. he was filled with wonder. 
like your answers very much," he 
told him, "but I feel you didn't think of 
them by yourself. Confess—who gave you 
these answers?" 

“It was my daughter 
nswered. 

"Your daughter!" exclaimed the no- 
ble е she is so clever. Fd 
to meet this girl. Send her here 
days! time. but listen carefully: She must 
come neither walking nor riding, ne 
ther dressed nor naked. She must also 
It that is not a gilt. 

The innkeeper rode home even. more 
n belo 


the nobleman’s 


ers 


" the innkeeper 


an. ike 


n three 


we 


inquired. "What's worry 
He told her of the noblenx 


s request 
and instructions, 


“Well. there's nothing to worry about," 
she said. "Go to the market place and 


buy me a fishing net. а goat, а couple of 
pigeons and several pounds of meat.” 
He departed and lmer returned to 


their little inn with cach item. 

At the appointed time, she undressed 
completely and wound herself in the 
fishing net, so she was neither dressed nor 
naked. She then mounted the goat, her 
feet dragging on the ground, so that she 
was neither nor walking. Takin 
the two pigeons in one hand and the meat 


in the other, she waved 
led Father 
ап stood at the window 
awaiting her al. As soon as he siw 
the strange sight. he turned his dogs 
loose amd. ay they wied to atack her 
‘The dog: 
diverted from di 1 prey, pounced 
on the meat and let her pass into the 
courtyard. 
‘ve brought you a gift that is not a 
gift" she said to the nobleman at the 
window, sireiching out. her hand holding 
the two pigeons, Suddenly. she released 
the birds and they winged skyward. 

The nobleman was enchanted with her, 


oodbye to her 


he threw them the mea 


thinking that perhaps her past answer, 
jı particular the third, was indeed q 
possible 


“What a very clever girl you a 
he cried. "I want to marry you, but only 
on the condition that you never inter- 
fere in my 
This she promised and shorily after 
rd, the girl became his wife, follow 
g the mysterious disappearance of his 
first betrothed. 

One «ау. as she walked through the 
courtyard, a weeping peasint passed by 
“Why do you weep?” she asked him. 
“My neighbor and 1 own a stable in 
partnership," he told h e keeps à 
w md Doa mare, Last night 
the mare gave birth to а colt under my 
neighbor's wagon. He insisted that the 
colt rightfully belonged to him. So 1 
brought the fellow before the nobleman 
who agreed with him and айй the colt 

s his. Un just, I say!” 


E 


on there 


Take my advice,” the noblema 
wile said. "Get a fishing rod and station 
yourself before my husband's window. 
Nearby, youll find a sand pile. Pretend 
you're Guching fish there. My husband 
surely will be puzzled and will ask you, 
"How сап you catch fish in а sand pile? 
So you will answer him, "I а wagon can 
give birth to a colt, then I 
fish in а sand pile.” 
peasant laughed. but 
structed and it happened exactly as she 
predicted 

When the nobleman hemd the peas 
ants answer, he asked, “You didn't con- 
juve this up out of your own head. Who 


di 


Ic was your wile,” replied the pe: 


ILLUSTRATION BY BRAO HOLLAND 


Ribald Classi 


Angrily. the nobleman stormed aw 
1 search of his wife 

"You have broken your promise not 
to interfere in my affairs” he shouted 2 
her. "Choose from all my possessions 
that which you believe able 
and reum forever to your father's house! 

"Very well,” she answered. “I will go; 
but before I do. please let us feast 
together for the Tast t 

He consented 
ner. she plied him with a pot 
After finishing the third bottle. the no- 
bleman became very drowsy and fell 
asleep. She quickly undressed him and 
ordered a carriage to be made ready. She 
then drove him, as he slept 10 her 
father's house. 

In the morning, he awoke to discov 
his change of address and quickly asked 
his wife, “How did I ever get here?” 

“Ie was Г who brought you here.” she 
confessed. "Don't you remember telling 
me to choose the most valuable posses- 
sion you owned and then to renun to my 
father's house?” 

The nobleman was overjoyed. 
you love me so. let's go home!” he said. 

They immediately. walked down 
the stairs past her shocked father and, 
without speaking, departed for the noble- 
тшп? estate. The innkeeper watched the 
camiage disappear in the distance and, 
smiling, noted the naked faa that his 
master had certainly changed since marry 


ig his clever daughter 
Retold by John C. Dickson Ba 


ay 


nc. 
their 
at wi 


and duri 


Since 


161 


PLAYBOY 


162 the possibi 


WONDERFUL FOLKS. 


month of the new ycar. Electronics com- 
panies have found themselves with huge 

on sets, ster- 
tors, unwanted at 


inventori 
dios and calcul 


cos, 


ing revised downward in anticipation of 
a slower expansion of the economy in 
the next three or four years. 


so no longer enjoys a seller's 
broad. International. monetary 
ve forced the value of the 


to float up by as much as 10 
to 15 percent in relation to other monies, 
a move that has effectively made Japanese 
products more expensive on the world 
market. In reaction t0 ] s export 
bliz of the past few years, both the 


United States and. Europe have become 
more restive—or perhaps hostile would 
be a better word. Economic relitions 


between the U.S. and Japan reached 
nadir Гам summer when President. М 
on imposed the ten-percent surcharge on 
imports, which was directed mainly at 
Japan, and with much arm twisting and 
acrimony. wrested an agreement from 
Japanese textile producers to "volt 
tarily” limit their sales to the U. S. Across 
the Atlantic, the picture hasn't been any 
ier. The cool and sometimes antag- 
mistic reception accorded Emperor Hiro- 
hito during last October's 18-day visit to 
Europe—where he was greeted with stony 
silence from crowds in London, threat- 
ened and jeered at by demonstrators in 
Holland and attacked as а "war crimi 
by the West German press—was as much 
а protest against Japan's rising economic 
power and political influence as it was 
festiition of bitter memories of 
var Two. 

Ironically, the end result of all this 
ty be the one thing Japan's critics fear 
stronger, more powerful Japan. 
The curent business recession 
pressure on the yen may be a blessing in 
isguise.” observes James C. Abegglen. 
president of the Boston Consulting 
Group of Japan. “It will weed out mar 
ginal producers, particularly in. textiles 
and electronics, streamline industry and 
force the country to те te its eco- 


br 


most 


nd 


tics." 


nomic prio! 

Fhe elimination of incihcient industry 
would eventually release thousands of 
workers who could provide the manpow- 
er companies need to assume a more 
commanding position in such fields iis 
petrochemicals, complete plant construc- 


tion, computer equipment and indus- 
trial automation (ап area im which the 
Japanese have already taken the lead 


over the West), Another possible future 
outlet for Japan's industrial energies is 
commercial jet aircraft. The Nippon 
Manufacturing Company has already ap- 
proached U craft producers about 
ty of a joint venture to 


(continued from page 152) 


"s first medium- 


produce J ge jet 
craft. 


In any 


эзе, the Japanese have little 
son to cry in their Kirin beer over 
their current. economic plight. What it 
boils down to, basically, is that instead 
of the 12t0-14-percent annual growth of 
the Sixties, the Japanese will have 10 be 
content with an economy that expands 
by only eight to ten percent in the 
Seventies. That's still around. twice the 
growth rate of the United States and ma 
jor European. countries. As Kenzo Naka 
yame, the head of Mitsui Bank's research 
department, notes: "The latent. growth 


potential of Japan's economy is very 
great and we expect it to remain that 


мау for some time to come. In other 
words, we expect to continue to grow 
and expand amd play а larger role in 
the world economy in the future." If 
ter cent 


nothing else. the past qu. 
ıs demonstrated the remarkable ability 
of the Japanese to adjust and adapt 
themselves to changing economic condi 
tions, to compete and to win. 

Many of ihe rc: Japan's eco: 
nomic prowess are fairly well known. 
World War Two gave the Japanese a 
chance to start anew with the most mod 
ern equipment and technology American 
aid dollars could buy, not to mention 
the billions of yen Japan saved by 
not having to defend itself. And military 
procurements during both the Korean 
M» the Vietnam wars aren't to be 
sneezed at, either. 

Automation and a high level of mod 
em industrial know-how have been big 
pluses, 100. During à visit to Nagoya. 1 
took а 30-minute detour to Toyota City 10 
visit one of the company's automatic- 
transmission plants. Typically spic and 
h floors recently washed and 
1 chrysanthemums 
long the assembly line. the 
plant was churning our 4000 engines 
and 3000 automatic. transmissions daily 

ith only 200 workers, evenly divided 
into two eight-hour shifts. The men are 
needed only for the final assembly work: 
Put a bolt ‚ей a screw there. 
The n is automated. Massive, 
growling machines conveyor belts 
faithfully efficiently follow the 
push-button orders of their human over 
lords from start to finish. 

Even the electronics industry, which is 
largely dependent on hand labor 
for mass production been able to 
specialize and simplify jobs to such an 
extent that housewives who might not 
know an integrated circuit from a tran- 
sitor can be trained for parttime jobs 
in a matter of days. Automation has 


span, wi 
fresh 
chids spaced 


nd white or- 


and 


propeller n 10 the top in world 
shipbuilding, and its stcelmakers! use of 
computers in production is among the 


most sophisticated in the world. Little 


ish 


wonder that Russian, French and Bri 
stechmakers are beating а path to Tokyo. 
d ders not forget the high educa 
tional level of the Japanese people nor 
the well-known innovative dapt- 
ty of Japanese industry. The Japa- 
nese have proved only too well that 
they possess a remarkable talent for tak- 
ing someone else's idea, changing 
improving it and achieving world-wide 
success with it. The transistor may have 
been invented in the U. S., but it carned 
its battle ribbons in Sony nd 
Panasonic tape recorders, Two decades 
ago, Du Pont sold its nylon-fiber tech- 
nology to Toyo Rayon—today one of 
the world's top producers of synthetic 
fibers. Keeping up with the Japanese is 
half the battle for foreign business 
After an cra of importing technology. 
the Japanese are now concentrating on 
“Compared with 
Hideo Shinojima, presi 
I Industries, 
“it might appear that Japanese firms do 
very lite in the way of research. But 
what we have done is to apply the sukima, 


develop 
Du Pont, 


or gaps, theory, We look for those tech- 
nological g € sometimes over- 
looked by U. By 
concentrating re- 


sources on only a few specific arcas, we are 
able to develop some unique technology.” 

Furthermore, as the Japanese develop 
more of their own, they are increasingly 
able to import more foreign technology 
through crosslicensing deals rather than 
ight purchase. Understandably. Tor- 
cign compinies—often hit hard in the 
past when their Japanese-purchased di 
velopments turned up later in their own 
markets—are more willing to release 
their parents in exchange for some Jap: 
nese innovations. 

Perhaps more at the root of Japan's 
prosperity th and wade, 


1 technolog 


howev the nation’s peculiar eco 
amie structure. Despite a ritual bow 10 
Western-style capital has an 


economy so tightly regulated and planned 
by the government that it makes the 
Russians look laissez-faire by comparison. 
The banks own almost everything and 
over them squats the imposing govern- 
ment central bank—the Bank of Јар 
which "advises" them on 
should do with their money. 
A kind of monetary Ратай 
effect; Those “sunrise” industries deemed 
the fittest to survive are protected and 
helped to grow, while the weakest 
t,” industries are left to die. Com- 
are fh 1 on а sca ol notes 
ly recently have turned to se- 
s as а means of capital. 
Thus, the average debt-to-cquity ratio of 
Japanese corporations is 80-20, just v 
verse that of their U.S counterparts. 
American businessmen negotiating joint 
(continued on page 197 ) 


they 


what 


or 


nies 


raisi 


ILLUSTRATIONS BY WARREN LINN 


me rorws of Мао Tsetung 
à personal-pol 
Alone among national leaders of 


the 20th C 
ро 


ry mind. 
principles of guer 


he conquered mainland. Cl 
‚ rhymed couplets. H 


them in tcr 
other general in 1 
of fighting 


r 
When he 


visits 


Iul. poctic imagi 
When 


are 


ıl autobiography. 


icd. а 
hud 

the 
illa warfare with which 
he wrote 


has com! 
ation with à 
he set down 


story turned his theory 


чо verse? 
Although classical in form, 
of almost ex 


the 


con. 


y 


his native. village, Shao 


Shan, in south China's Hunan Province, 
he does not write about memories of 
his k iterate, Buddhist mother, nor 
of sh, semi e faher, nor 
of the fields where he once carried 
manure, but of peasant spears raised 

When he writes to friends, it 


in revolt 


is not friendship that 


party str 
part. Even wha 


which he 
Mao men 


executed. by the Kuomintang in. Chang 
because she would not repudiate 
either her husband or the Communist 
Party, he gives no warm iecollecii 
life together. He calls h 
the revolutionary fight 
c is hardly one. poem without a 
d admiring look at the Chinese 
the Great Snow Mountains, the 
immense rivers, the rice fields, Mao had 
walked over those mountains in the wes 
he had swum in those rivers in the east. 
he had worked im those fields in rhe 
south and had created immense political- 
i s among them, Then he sat 
wrote harmoniously formed 
the his 


ons of 


his “tough 


and 
at combine 


моту of 


sense of the 
I took place. On the follows 
wes is a representative selection 
M 
laboration betwei 
n poct and a 1 


1 a well-know 
ling Chinese novelist. 


THE 

CLASSICAL 
VERSE 

OF A 
REVOLUTIONARY 


E 
NIEH HUA-LING 
AND 

PAUL ENGLE 


163 


164 


CHANGSHA 
Autumn 1925 


Standing alone in the cold autumn, 
where the Hsiang River flows north, 
оп the tip of Orange island, 
looking at thousands of hills, 

red all over, 

row alter row of woods, all red, 
the river is green to the bottom, 

a hundred boats struggling, 

eagles striking the sky, 

fish gliding under the clear water. 
All creatures fight for freedom 
under the frosty sky. 

Alone in infinity, 

1 ask the far-reaching earth: 

who controls this rise and fall? 


Hundreds of friends used to come here. 

Remember the old times—the years of 
fullness, 

when we were students and young, 

blooming and brilliant 

with the young intellectual's 

emotional argument, 

fist up, fist down, 

fingers pointing 

at river and mountain, 

writings full of excitement, 

lords of a thousand houses merely 
dung. 

Remember still 

how, in the middle of the stream, 

we struck the water, 

making waves which stopped 

the running boats. 


No 


China was as important in 
the early lile of Mao Tsetung as 

sha, the capital of Hunan Province, 
which lies just south of the immense 
Yangize River. As а boy in middle 
school Hsiang-hsiang, 
t learned of 
me across the fol- 
low sentence in n article: “After 
eight rs of difficult war, Washington 
won vicory and built up his nation.” In 
the spring of 1911, when Mao and his 
1 entered. the 
sha, Mao en- 
liar word in a 


America when he c 


ж college 
tered another 


nf. 


the word socialism. That quiet 
t would ultimately shake the 20th 


in CI sha that he heard 
about the April 97, 1911, Kuomintang 
uprising in Canton against the Manchu 
dynasty in which 130 leaders of the 
movement attacked the government. 
office, 72 being killed or executed. They 
became famous all over China as “the 


72 martyrs of the Yellow Flower Mound.” 
Ti was in Changsha that Mao wrote pol 


cal articles and put ther 
was done by young С у 
Inter im the Cultural Revolution. Mao 
lso lel "queuechopping" expeditions 
against this sien of tradition and claimed 
ten queues. 

A revolution broke out in Wuhan in 


up on walls, as 


October 1911. A short time later, the 
city of Changsha declared its inde- 
pendence а d the army. As 
biographer Robert Payne in his percep- 
€ hook Mao Tsetung describes the 
episode, “Thirsting for a military care 


ngsha on garrison duty. Не 
was paid seven dollars a month, and his 
chief occupation was to be the servant of 
the younger officers. . . . By the summ 
he had left the army and he was 

it in poverty in nghouse.”” 
Mao the Teacher? 
Traini t. Changsha, where he 
formed a discussion socicty of students, 
many of whom were to be very impor- 
tant later in Chinese affairs. Edy 
Snow, the author of Red Star Over 
China, quotes Mao's recollections of 
those days: “At this time my mind was а 
curio хане of ideas of libe 
democratic reformism and utopian 
I had soi а vague passions 
“19h Century. democracy. utopi- 
and old-fashioned liberalism, and 
nd anti- 


lod; 


next entered 


sm 


so- 


ewh 


ci 
about 
anism 


ism. 


ed in 1918.” 
r the scene of several 


near which Mao 
was born, flows past Changsha on its way 
to the Yangtze. It is famous for its beauty. 
al is west of Changsha. 

The students mentioned in the verse 
were members of Mao's study circle, and 
e whole poem recalls the days when 
young Chinese were cam- 
ning to stir up the people against 
the powerful “lords of a thousand houses” 
1, especially, the war lord Yuan Shih- 
kai, who was attempting lo succal the 
Мапе as emperor of China. 


CHINGKANG MOUNTAI 
Autumn 1928 


Below the mountain, their flags flying, 

High on the mountain, our bugles 
blowing: 

A thousand circles of the enemy around 
us: 

we still stand unmoved. 


Defense is deadly, trench and wall, 

the strongest fort is our will. 

From Huangyangchteh cannon roar, 

crying: the enemy runs away in the 
night. 


CHINGKANG MOUNTAI 
1965 

A longtime cherished hope: 
to fly through clouds 

and once more visit Chingkangshan, 
coming a thousand miles 

to search for the old place, 

all changed by a new look. 


[9] 


le singing, swallow 
everywhere, 

flowing water bubbling, 

tall trees climbing into the sky, 

Huangyangchieh’s paths, then deadly, 

now not even steep. 


dancing, 


Wind and thunder were violent, 
poweriul flags were waving. 
Now unshakable on earth, 

the passing of thirty years 

à moment's snap of the thumb. 


Now we can pick up the moon 

in the nine-leveled sj 

and catch turtles in all five oceans. 

Triumphant return with talk and 
laughter: 

nothing difficult in this world 

if you can keep climbing. 


hingkang is а mountain area roughly 
97 miles wide and 170 miles long ou the 
border between the southern parts of 
Hunan and Kiangsi provinces. The peak 
occupied by Mao and the small Red Army 
group he took there in October of 1927 
after the failure of the Autumn Harvest 
Uprising in Hunan was named Та 
Hsiao Wu Chin (Five Big-Liule Wells), 
for the springs that flowed there. Mao 
had 1000 men and 200 rifles. There 
меге Buddhist temples all over the 
mountain, which the Reds used as hospi- 
tals, offices and dormitories. Clothes 
were hung on the agedarkened statues 
of the god. A printing press was set up 
and newspapers printed on the backs of 
Buddhist scrolls. If there is one place 
їп be described as where it all 
it is Chingkang Mountain. Here 
terms of guerilla warfare were 


the 
worked out in the most practical and 
painful way—by fighting and dying. 

The Kuomintang troops assaulted. the 


mountain many times, ^ 


rough slopes and fi 


but the gorg 
ws made defense 
ible. The winter bitter, food 
Two bandits with armed 
pea ang Tso and Yuan Wen-t 
-threatened Mao's small band but w 
persuaded to join instead, Conditions 
were rough and the soldiers invented 
the slogan "Down with capitalism; са 


pos was 


scire. 


isanis—V 


squash, 
Huangy place of wind- 
Md d hs where se 


the 


times 
shek) fore 
The тоа 
Chingkang 


ang (Chiang 
tacked and were гери 
of the cannon. mentioned 
Mountain 1928 relers to 
barrage laid down by the nationalists to 
cover their retreat. Mao had lured the 
into an ambush there. 


The fist Chingkang Mountain poem 
is about survival: the desperate struggle 
of Mao's small army to avoid being 
wiped out. Chingkang Mountain 1965 
37 years later, to 
the place where it all beg: 


THE LONG MARCH 
October 1935 


The Red Army does not fear 

the Long March toughness. 

Ten thousand rivers, a thousand 
mountains, easy. 

The Five Ridges 

merely little ripples. 

Immense Wu Meng Mountain— 

merely a mound of earth 

Warm are the cloudy cliffs 

beaten by Gold Sand River. 

Cold are the iron chains 

bridging Tatu River. 

Joy over Min Mountain, 

thousand miles of snow: 

when the army crossed, 

every face smiled. 


In October 1934, 90,000 Red 


таоме! di 


some 


“soviet” in 
ern. Chi 


Kuomir 


г severe defeats by the 
ı Army. and began to walk 
jı and children and wounded 
буйр them. In the first three 
000 men died attacking the 
blockhouses that. Chiang Kaishek's army 
had established in their way. It was esti 
mated that 15 battles were fought, with 


skirmishes every day. The Red Army in 
days on the Long March 


roughly 
walked 235 days in daytime and 18 days 
night. It covered over. 6000 miles of 
some of the most difficult landscapes in 
the — world—deserts, low mountains. 
swamps. [ast rivers in high gorges—under 
irc from ground and air. Losses were 


mous. 
The Long March per. 
. Three of his children 

had to be left with peasants along the 
When an effort was later made to 
c them, they could not be found. 
c. Ho Trudi'un, was pregn 


lso meant a 


sonal loss for Ma 


bombing, she sulfered 18 to 20 
wounds, although she survived. Mao's 
brother, Mao Tse-Uan, was killed fight- 
ing in 1935 on the march. 

The Five Ridges referred to in thc 
poem are rugged heights in the south 
eastern provinces of Hunan, Kwangtun 
Kw id. Kweichow. Wu Meng Ra 
between. Kw 
Yunnan provinces. 

The upper Yangue River in Yunnan 
Province, where it through deep 
gorges and mile-high peaks, is known as 
the Gold Sand River. Here Ch 
troops had occupied all crossings 
seized every boat. A Red Army det 
ment. however, disguised itself in Natic 
alist uniforms and succeeded. in tricking 
the enemy and gaining a bridgehead. 

The crossing of the Tatu River the 
remote and rugged western mountains 
was more diflicult—it became the most 
perilous and spectacular single action of 
the Long March, This arca was the home 
of the Lolo people, tribesmen who had 
1 ese. 
who were persuaded to guide and help 
the Red forces, 

To reach Lutingch'iao (Bridge Made 
by Lu) over the Tam, the only possi- 
ble crossing place for the whole army, 
the troops m "d west over trails so 
narrow 
olt the diffs. 
torches flickercd in the vertical i 
sity of the gorges. They would stop only 
rest, food 


how 


been conquered by the Chi 


ch 


at men and animals often fell 


n, their long line of 


for ten-minute 
and exhortations to drive om 


breaks—for 


The bridge built by Lu 
discovered to be a construction of iron 
ch: over 300 feet long, stretched 
across the river and floored with planks. 
But many of the planks had been re- 
moved and there was a regiment of 
Kuomi hoops dug in on the oppo- 
site bank. 

The Red comm 


nders called for vol- 
unteers and sent them across the bridge, 
pistols and grenades strapped to th 
backs, The first were shot and fell into 
the river, but a few worked their reck 
les way to the point where flooring 


165 


166 


remained. One Red soldier pulled him- 
self up onto the boards and, with a 
grenade, eliminated the Kuomintang 
post on the north bank, Soldiers there 
had thrown kerosene on the remaining 
planks and set them оп fire, but too 
late. Red soldiers put out the flames and 


replaced the flooring of the bridge. 
Within an hour, the whole Red Army 


ts Crossing the uncros 
on its way into Szechwan Province 


there 
were few Kuomintang troops. But now 


In the far west of Szeciwan, 


me the 
over 


landscape bec: 
miles of walkin: 
mountain ranges lay ahead. Tt was June 
md warm, but when these south 
Chinese in cotton clothing climbed the 
Great Snow Mountain, over 16,000 feet 


enemy—2000 
seven immense 


high (they could stare west into the 
and glistening-white peaks of 
many of them died from ihe 


cold. Two thirds of the transport ls 
ent of 


tcl rock: 
Mou 


own path over deep mud 
Crossing the Great Snow 
Mao fell sick and 1 
Winds were so stron, 


killed by rock stones. 

On July the Red 
reached the rih Mot са in 
northwest Szechwan, where it met the 


purth Front Rel Army of 40,000 well- 
med troops. In August, Mao drove 
on acaos the Great Grasslands, dense 
ps over which riin fell and fog 
hovered all through Once, 
for ten days, they saw no human hab 
tion. With medical supplies gone, the 


sw 


the month. 


ick 
were simply left behind, The troops were 


attacked with poi 
Mantu tribe 
made Ши 
gree 
stepped 
as always, 


oned arrows by hostile 
men and the poisoned mud 
legs blister. They ate whi 
for there was no firewood. Men 
nto mud and disappeared, bu 
ugh mi lithe Gr 

lands to make a column. 

Once dear of the grass and mud, they 
had to fight Mohammedan cavalry on 
the high plains and, in Kansu Province, 
more Kuomintang troops. On October 


sury 


5, the Red Army came to the end 
journey that had almost annihilated 
it but which gave Mao a chance to test 
his military and political principles and 
to learn more of China th: 
city-based Kuomintang lea 

The last snow-covered peak 
crossed was Min Mountain. Never 
did the Red Army fight ii 

Mao himself has written 


they 


swer that the Long March is the first of 
its kind in the s of history, that it is 
a manifesto, a propaganda force, a seed- 
ing machine. . For 12 months we 
were under daily reconnaissance and 
bombing from the skics . . . while on 
land we wer rcled and pursued , . . 
by a huge force, and we encountered 
untold difficulties and dangers on the 
way: vet by using our two legs we swept 
across a distance of more than 25,000 li 
[one li is approximately a third of a mile] 
through the length and breadth of 11 
provinces. Let us ask, has history ever 


known a march to equal ours? . ., The 
Long March ... has amı 1 to some 
200.000.000 people in 1l provinces that 


the road of the Red Amny is their only 
1 to liberation.” 


LOU MOUNTAIN PASS 
February 1935 

West wind fierce, 

immense sky, wild geese honking, 
frosty morning moon. 

Frosty morning moon. 

Horse hooves clanging, 

bugles sobbing, 


Tough pass, 

long trail, like iron. 

Yet with strong steps 

we climbed that peak. 
Climbed that peak: 

green mountains like oceans, 
setting sun like blood. 


Loushan Pass is im northern Tsunyi 
County in Rweichow Province, de- 


scribed as a thousand peaks penetrating 
the sky, a thread through the middie. It 
was also said that one determined sol- 
dier could hold its often. oneman-wide 
wail against thousands. The Red Arm 
after walking 190 li (appr 
v 63 miles) without food on Febru- 
ary 2. 1935, during the Long March. 
The Reds tumed back for a conference 
at the city of Tsunyi, then returned and 
stormed the pass a second time on Feb- 
тилу 26. The pass is described as having 
two thatched houses and a stone tablet 
with the inscription LoUsmax Pass in 
three characters, It was said that there 
s a corner every ten paces and a tum 
every 


хі 


SNOW 

February 1936 

Landscape oí the north: 

ten hundred miles ice-frozen, 
len thousand miles snow flying. 
Look at the Great Wall, 

this side, other side, 

only white wilderness. 

Up and down the Yellow River, 
suddenly deep waves disappear. 
Mountains, silver snakes dancing; 
plateaus, wax-white elephants running, 
trying to be higher than heaven. 
Some fine day 

you will see the land 

dressed in red, 

wrapped with while, 

flirting, enchanting. 


Rivers and mountains so beautiful 

heroes compete 

n bowing humbly before them. 

y Emperors Chin Huang and Han 
Wu, 

not enough talent. 

Pity Emperors Tang Tsung and Sung 
Tsu, 

not enough brilliance. 

That tough spoiled child of heaven, 

Genghis Khan, 

only knew how to pull the bow 

shooting eagles. 


All are gone. 
For heroes, 
now is the time. 


Accord 
though subtitled 


g to Robert Payne, this poem, 
February 1936, was 
written in August 1945 while Mao was 
flying (his first trip in a plane) from 
in to Chungking for a conference 
shek to discuss а ruce, 
al coope: It seems to 
the first poem of M. 
through newspa- 


pation 


Xs to 


per public: 
This is one 
com 


in which M 
ese legend, history and 
contemporary politics. In effect, he con- 
dudes that many, many centuries culmi- 
nate in his ellort ло make а new China, 
a new sort of Chinese рея 

The first stanza seems to say that 
nature overwhelms the landscape wi 
snow, but one day the Land. will bec 
more attractive. The second 
names great men of the past who were 
still not great enough for the country: 
time for heroic men to rix 
ns are those of the high 
aus of Shen 1 Shansi in the 
north, 

Chin 


nore poet 


son. 


me 


stanza 


ig was first emperor of 
Han Wu belonged 
irn Han dynasty (202 4.0 
was first emperor of 
guished Tang dynasty (618-906). 
Sung Tsu fist emperor of the Sung 
isty (960-1196). Genghis Khan, the 
gol invader, reigned 1206-1227. 


SWIMMING 

June 1956 

Just drank Changsha water. 

Now eating Wuchang fish. 

I swim across the ten-thousand-mile- 
long Yangtze, 

looking as far as the endless Chu skies, 

ignoring wind's blowing and wave's 
beating: 

better than walking slowly 

in the quiet courtyard. 


Today 1 am relaxed and free. 


Coníucius said by the river: 
All passing things flow away like the 
river. 


Boats sail with the wind. 

Turtle and Snake mountains stay, 

while great plans grow. 

A bridge flies across north to south, 

natural barrier turned into an open 
road. 

High in the gorges a rock dam will rise, 

cutting off Wu Mountain's cloud and 
rain. 

A still lake will climb in the tall gorges. 

Mountain goddess— 

1 hope she is still well— 

will be startled at a changed world. 


Every one of Mao's poems is based on 
a classical form, It is said that he based 
the tune of this poem on an example 
from the beautiful works of the Tang 
dynasty (the great period of lyrical poetry 
in China), called Water Song. 

Water п a constant theme in 
life as well as in his verse. He 
s а boy, at school 
ative vi 


am in cold rivers 


i Hsiang-hsiang and in his 
lage of Shao 5 In May 1956, Mao left 
Peking to inspect south China, At Wu- 
n, he swam across the Yangtze Riv 
(lowing 3900 miles from the Tibet 
heights а to the жа). 
The poem is by a man who believes that 
g is one of our noblest activi- 
‘Swit 
with nature," Mao wrote, 
› to the river, the осе, 
He also remarked, "Y; 
It is big, but not 


ming is an exercise of strug: 
"You 


So, there in this world 
are big but not frightening.” It 
cal of Mao to s 


that 
эр 
"When you swim 
rents going agai 

will and courage to be 


a 


ast you 


stro: 
In the southern suburbs of Ch: 


па 


(Long Sands), there is White Sands Well. 
Tt never overllows, is never dry, its water 
s pure and clear. In summer, 
people come until after midnight to 
lake its famous water, There is a sor 


(220-265 A.) that opposes a change in 
the government's location on the grounds 
that, good as the fish of the new place 
giv 
wonderful Tt refers to the 
noval of the government from ancient 
nych (present Nanking) west to Wu- 
chang on the Yangtze 


Chi 


Rather drink the waters of Chienych 
Than taste the fish of Wuchang. 


ith a cynical refe 
ence to Confucius observation th 
everything flows away like the river. For 
Mao, this is too passive, By swimming 
астоѕ the big river, Mao shows how 


Mao continucs 


man can conquer mature, not simply 
flow with ihe current but oppose i 
Tortoise and Snake е nes of 


mountains facing 
ides of the Y. 
imo a n 
t new bridge crosses 
s the Yangize, which 
division berween north 
г the new re- 


r on opposite 
the turbi 
It is 


эу pasige 


now, 1 
s a unifying “road.” 

dam Mao mentions is to be 
on the upper Yangue where it flows 
through Szechwan. Mao d stically 
combines the vision of the new da 
with classical mythology. In Wusha 
th Mountain of the Goddess 
near the sie of the dam. An ancient 
poem of Sung Yu describes how King 


Hsiang of Chao (298-264 wc.) dreamed 
that he spoke with the goddess, who told 
rond the 


walked. 
But man will 
and the 


fell. 
‚ Mao 


ше all 


iserts, 


goddess will be surprised. by a lake 
sing in the wild counny: the 
new China astonishing the oM. EJ ic 


PLAYBOY 


168 


TERMINAL MAN 


“Pretty much the same,” Gi 
“Almost as bad." 

The NPS staff was accusiomed now to 
the idea that when the computers interact- 
ed, the results were unpredictable. The 
general form of interaction could be 
guessed, but the specific results were u 
certain. It was like a computer playing 
checkers—it would probably win, but it 

a dillerent way cach 


rhard said. 


would w 
depending on what the opponent did, 


1 DON'T WANT A GORILLA, 
DON'T YOU LIKE GORILLAS? 


NO THANK YOU. 

vor ARE TOO POLITE. 

1 АМ SORRY IF 1 OFFEND YOU IN ANY 
way. 

YOU TALK TOO MU 

1 AM SORRY. 

HAVE FGGPLANT, 


Richards watched. with 
George had no 
But he disliked cuc 


t 
ckground for eggplants- 


n 


mbers and | 


nanas. 


NO THANK YOU. 
DON'T YOU LIKE 
хот VERY MUCH. 
HERE, HAVE ANOTHER. ONE, 
NO THANK YOU. 

1 wasi 


ECCI 


ANT? 


You To HAVE: 


т. 


No THANK You 
GO ON AND TARE IT. 
хо HANK YOU. 
L INSIST. 

No THANK YOU. 
“What's happe 

Richards asked, “+ 

much the same 
“That's what's bothering me.” 

Whats he cyding through оп the 


n George?" 
responses are 100 


7E was looking for it when you сате 


I INSIST THAT YOU HAVE A CUCUMBER. 


1 REFUS 
“George!” Richards said. almost with- 
out thinks 
JEN HAVE A BANAN 
хо. 
“George is breaking down," Richards 


said. “He's not a saint anymore." 


THEN HAVE gu 


HOA BANANA AND 


CUCUMBER 
NO THANK YOU 
1 INSIST 
10 


кїз. 1 


мил, KILL YOL 


he screen was filled with white dots. 


“What docs that mean-—unprintable re 
sponse?” Richards said. 
^E don't know. Tve never seen it be 
fore tonight. , 
"How many this program 


been run?" Rich: 


(continued from pa 


116) 


“A hundred and ten, against Martha.” 


“Any lear 


"No. 
“TM be mued, Richards s 
“Hes getting to be a shorttempered 


siint" He gı 
one up." 
Gerhard nodded and went back to the 
printout. In theory, what was happening 
. Both George and. Mar 
programmed to learn from 
Like the  checkers-playing 
which the machine got 
e it played a game—this 


ed. "We can write this 


were 


as—in 
ach ti 


was established so that the 
те would “learn” new responses to 
ings. After 110 sets of experience. 


nt George had abruptly stopped be 
ga saint. He was learning not to bi 
int around Martha—even though he 
had been programmed for saintlincss. 

“TL know just how he feels," Richards 
and switched the chine off. Then 
he joined Gerh. S for the pro- 
тог had m 


said 


rd, lool 
that 


1 INTERFACING 
1 


Janet Ross sit in the empty wom a 
need at the wall clock. It was n 


ad 
ne 


AM. She looked down at the desk in 
front of her, which was ba 
a vase of flowers 
looked. 


e except for 
nd a note pad. She 
t the chair opposite her. Then. 
| “How're we doing?” 
anical click 
Gerhard’s voice came through the spe 
cr mounted in the ceiling. “We need a 
few minutes for the sound level. The 
light is OK. You want to talk а minute: 
She nodded and glanced over her 
shoulder at the one-way glass behind her. 
She saw only her rellection, but she 
Gerhard e behind, 
waich 
“L don't know what to say. 
is the time for all good men to come 
id ol the patient’ “The quick 
brown fox jumped over the pithed frog. 
“We are all headed toward that final c 
mon pathway in the sky." She ра 
that enough?’ 
“That's fine: 
serhard said. 
She looked up at the loudspeaker 
Will you be interfacing at the end 
"Probably." Gerhard. said. 
well, Rog is in a hurry to get hi 
Inanquilizers. 
she nodded. Th 
in Benson's treatment and it had to be 
done before trauquilizers could be ad- 
ered. Benson had been kept о 
h ph until mid- 


was a mec and 


knew 


Now 


to the 


ased, “Is 


we have the level now; 


the final stage 


scd 
night the n 


nobarbita 
He 


n wi 


belor 


would be 


dearheaded this morning a 
interlacing, 


term interfacing. McPherson liked com- 
puter terminology. An interface was the 
y between two systems. Or be 
tween a computer and an effector mech 
son's case, it was almost а 
boundary between two computers—his 
brain aud the little computer wired into 
his neck. The wires had been attached, 
but the switches hadu't been thrown ус. 
Once they ме feedback loop ot 
Benson-computer-Renson would be i 
stituted, As soon as the computer read 
abnormal brain waves, it would deliver 
shock to stop the abnormal wave and 
prevent an epileptic seizure. 
today practical question was 
this: Which of the 40 electrodes would 
prevent an attack? Nobody knew 
It would be determined exper 
Wg the operation, the clectrodes 
had been located. precisely, within mi 
s of the target area. That wa 
^d good surgical placement: but 
it 


consideri 
was grossly inadequate. From that stand- 
point, the electrodes had been crudely 
positioned. And this crudencss 
that many of them were required. It was 
sumed that if several electrodes. were 
placed in the correct general area, at 
Jeast one of them would be in the pre 


the density of the b 


meant 


cise position to abort an attack. Trial- 
and-error stimulation. would deter 
the proper electrode to use. 


Parent coming, said 
through the loud-speake 


A moment later, Benson arrived in a 


wheelchair, wearing his blue-and-white 
striped bathrobe. He seemed alert. as he 
ed to Ross stiflly, the shoulder 1 
s inhibiting movement of his 
“How are you feeling?” he 
smiled 

^m supposed to ask. you.” 
TB ask the questions around. here.” 


he said. He was still smiling, but there 
was an edge to his voice. With some 
surprise, she realized that he was alr 


And then she wondered why that sur- 
prised her. Of course he would be afraid. 
Anyone would. She wasn't. exactly calm 
herself. 

The 


nurse рамей Benson on the 
shoulder, nodded to Dr. Ros and Ich 
the room. They were alone. 

For a moment, neither spoke. Benson 
K. She w 
ime по focus the TV 
wd to prepare his 


; she stared b; 


сате 
stimulating equipment. 
“What are we doing today?" 
sked. 
“We are goin 
odes tod: 
appe 
He seemed to таке this calmly, but she 
(continued on page 225) 


Benson 


is to stimulate your clec 
у. sequentially, to see what 


article By ANTHONY BURGESS the art of prophecy, long in disrepute, is held 
up to the glass of personal experience and contemporary sctence—and noi found wanting 


NO READER, I take it, has been so naive as to rush to this article in the hope that I am about to 
unleash the great secret of (let's use the scientific term) precognition. If I knew how to foretell 
the future, I would not be writing about it: I would be too busy backing tomorrow’s winners. 
Moreover, if such a secret could be generally imparted, of what use would it be to you? Every- 
body, including the bookmakers, would know tomorrow’s winners. Indeed, there would not be 
much point in holding the race. No, the gift of accurate prediction is a thing we have to either 
discover for ourselves (as the invisible Man discovered invisibility) or dream of having magically 
conferred on us. Science, which grants no favors, would give the precognitive faculty to the whole 
world, with the indifference with which it has already given television and transistors and laser 
beams. It would if it could. Nobody thinks it will: We can leap space miraculously but not time. 
This is maddening, since time doesn’t—in the old priestly argument quoted in one of Graham 
Greene's novels—seem to have any solidity in it: “The present has no duration, and it comes be- 
tween the past, which has ceased to exist, and the future, which has not yet started to exist.” 
Yet the tough frosted-glass barrier is there. But, so science seems cautiously to admit, not for every- 
one. Precognition is a faculty that the superstitious past accepted, the materialistic 19th Century 
scoffed at and the pragmatic present is working on. E 

Many already accept two paranormal faculties that Victorian scientists would have derided— 
ESP, or extrasensory perception, and PK, or psychokinesis. The first is a process whereby thoughts 
are transferred or facts discovered without the intermediacy of normal devices of communication. 

_ The second denotes the influence of the will—human or animal or (if we are to accept polter- 
geists) disembodied—on objects that it has no normal means of controlling. Gamblers have always 
tended to believe that the fall of dice or cards could be “willed”; the Duke Parapsychology Labo- 
ratory seemed to establish support for such a belief. At the same time, it attested, through laborious 
'experiments, that telepathy and clairvoyance were not to be laughed off as parlor tricks. 
Many cold-blooded rationalists have been forced to accept ESP and PK, but they draw the line at 
precognition. Why? 

The obvious answer is, in the words of Professor Robert Thouless, that “the future has not yet 
happened and therefore cannot produce any effects in the present." This formed the basis of the 
rejection by Dr. Tanagras—the late president of the Greek Society for Psychical Research—of 
what would, to the man in the street, seem very obvious cases of precognition. There was, for in- 
stance, a child living near Athens who claimed to have been visited by an apparition in white who 
told him that he was going to be killed by an automobile. The child wisely spent most of his time 
indoors after that. But one day he risked going out to play on the road. He saw a car coming, 
rushed onto the sidewalk and flattened himself against a wall. The car also mounted the sidewalk 
and crushed the child. Dr. Tanagras was adamant in refusing to take this as an example of previ- 
sion. What happened, instead, he said, was that the child exerted an unconscious PK influence on 
the brain of the driver and forced him into an accident. 

It's possible that Dr. Tanagras was predisposed to accept this kind of human influence on 
external events—what he called psychoboulia—becausehe lived in the evil-eye belt. The belief 
that some human beings have a faculty for nastily and willfully blasting plants, turning milk 


169 


PLAYBOY 


170 


sour, stopping hens from laying, making 
people ill and so on, is commoner in 
southern. Europe than in the dourer lat 
tudes north. Let somebody predict an 
earthquake and let that pred come 
true: Dr. Tanagras would at once have 
suggested that what the person really did 
to cause the earthquake. It's easier to 
disrupt untold tons of soil and rock wi 
а wanton shaft of the will than to pic 
the veit of time. But it’s just ihat meta 
phor of the veil that Dr. Tanagras would 
have rejected: hides from us 
t's already there, but how 

already there if it | 
pened yet? The point is well ta 
And yet ісу evident that some things 
are highly predictable. Metcorologists can 
forecast tomorrow's weather; а Gallup 
Poll can. give us a fairly reliable indica 
of how an election will go (Шоц) 

recent history teaches, i 


е 


as 
fall 
down badly); an eclipse of the sun or the 


n also 


moon will come when astronomers say it 
will. To а great extent, we can. prefab 
cate the future out of the materials of the 
past. People who accept the philosophy of 
determinism will say that the end of time 
was immutably fixed at the beginning of 
time; that everything has been prear- 
ranged, down to the shirt 1 will wear next 
Frida ї there ате no accidents and 
no free will. This scenis to go too far. We 
can accept the fact that death from cancer 
is 


» accident, since the seeds of the dis 
ease have been long planted; that the stare 
of World War Two was implicit in the 
end of World War One; that miniskirts 
must be replaced by long skirts. Bur how 
about the winners of horse races, 
crashes in perlect landing conditions, the 
heed to have а tooth pulled on August 
second rather thin October ninth? 
Prophecy is easy with big historical 
processes. In his poem Locksley Hall, 
which he published in 1819. 


Tennyson 


foresaw commercial aviation ial - 
fare, Communist revolutions and the 
establishment of the UN (or it might have 


heen the League of Nations). We pretend 
to be amazed at this, but weren't all these 
developments implicit in the science and 
politics of his own age? In his The 
Shape of Things to Come, H. G. Wells 
described, ten yews before it happened, 
а war between Germany and the rest of 
Europe, with the immediate cause of the 
outbreak the Polish Corridor. Was this 
so dilficult to prophesy? Go back to the 
Centuries of Nostradamus 1555 and 
you will find any predicion you want; 
almost everything in those gnomic rhymes 
is so vague. Go back even further, to the 
Roman poct Virgil, aud you will find not 
only a prediction of the birth of Christ 
(in the Eclogues) but (im the Aeneid) 
the very suggestive line “Deseribunt ra- 
dio, et surgentia sidera dicunt," This can 
be taken as forehearing т 
varies ("They will describe by radio") 


and 


communication satellites (“R 
will speak"). Desire to break the vei 
promotes belief that it сап be done. In 


the same way, hindsight turns pure acci- 
dent into prevision. 

L will give a recent example of this. A 
chartered aircraft crammed with Britishers 
on holiday crashed in the Balkans: Every- 
body, crew member and passenger alike, 
was killed. Now, it happened that a young 
married couple had booked well ahead 
for his at the last moment, had 
to cancel the booking; the wife had fallen 
ill with acute gastric pains, To put this 
down to accident is entirely reasonable. 
But it was inevitable that the reasonable 
explanation should be jettisoned; it wasn't 
glamorous enough. The pains were iner- 
preted as an emanation of foreboding, 
aculous accession of psychic stomach- 
- How ready we all are to believe this 
kind ol thing; how wc loathe rcason 

Can anyone blame us? Reason is so 
dull The older civilizations reposed 
trust in soothsayers’ prophecies (was that 
ides-of-March business invented belore 
or afler Julius Caesar's assassinationz), 
palpitued as the entails of animals 
ог hts of birds were divined, made 
pilgrimages to an imbecilic village girl 
in a cave and bowed down to her as 
the sibyl. Were they very much more 
credulous than our own age? I scoff at 
the copies of Foulsham's Dream Book 
and Old Moore's Almanac that атс sold, 
along with stamps and ice cream, in my 
local post office; but 1 rather pride my- 
self on my ability to read. palms (chiro- 
mancy) and tell curds (cartomancy). 
Moreover, 1 don't. regard this skill as 
merely something to enliven parties or 
raise money at charity bazaars. 1 believe 
that there may be something in it. 

My precognitive pack is the tarot—a 
large wad consisting of two groups of 
1 The 
jor group (56 cards, including princes 
s well as jacks) is the forerunner of the 
pack we use for card games, with four 
suits named swords, staves, cups and 
pentacles, The major group is made up 
rely of symbolic pictures—a man 
ng by his foot from a tree, a tow 
being struck by ig, the dead ris 
ing to sclic trumpet, the moon 
dripping blood, a fem: 


cards 
1 


ana, or mysteri 


e Pope, a woman 
and other fani 
By arranging part 
according to principle: 
laid down in Рариѕ The Tarot of the 
Bohemians, it is possible to give gener 
ized but reliable answers to questions 
bout the fuune. These questions tend 
10 be specialized and conditional: 
“What will happen to this money if I 
it in IBM?" or “If I marry th 
man will I be An answer such as 
"There may be trouble at 
things will work out well in the end. 
one quite likely to be fulfilled; “ 


s of 


invest 


bpy? 


end” cannot be picked out on any calen- 
dar. Questions such as "Who will win the 
next Presidential election?” or “Give the 
date of the finish of ul inam ма 
tend to confuse the tarot and make it 
evasive. T have found it useful chiefly as 
a decision maker in cases where two 
possible Jines of action have equal merit. 
But, prone as we all are to look for mi 

acles, there's a tendency for hindsight to 
credit the tarot with more powe 

really possesses. That it possesses some 
power I cannot. doubt, but it's not of the 
nd that can be tested in a labo 

The same may be said of palmistry. It 
ible to read general facts of 
il fortune from 
salient lines and bumps on both hands 
nd, while the features of the left hand 
seem to remain. static. those of the right 
hand appear capable of change. Thus, 
the chiromancer will taking the defi 
hand first, tell the subject (who is ofte 
a girl and is often giggling) about the 
formation of health and character 
ambition in the past and then, changing 
to the right hand, say something about 
what is happening in the present and 
seems likely to happen in the future 
Aware of the austere disciplines of the 
rigorous parapsychelogists. I am shy of 
recounting some of my successes; but 
I will give onc story. lu an English 
pub onc icy January night, I read the 
right hands of a married couple aud 
found that their lines of life terminated 


atory 


and 


at roughly the sune point, The emba 
rassing thing was that sudden death 
seemed imminent at the very time of 


reading, and I told them so. They went 
out into the night cheerfully c 
into their саг, skidded on the ice, struck 
а tree and were badly injured. A little 
more alcohol, a weightier impact, and 
they could have been killed, Some time 
after, reading their hands once more, 1 
fancied that the life lines were no longer 
prematurely trunc they were grow 
ing again. Death H 
ple. then ret 
grumbl te period. 
This is. I know, pure anecdotal stull, 
suitable for drinking sessions but not 
very impressive to the. parapsychologi 
wi the beforeandalier photo 


graphs, the sober tesis. the laboratory 
confirmations? The поче with these 
amateur acts of divination is that a de 


sire for wonders is only too ready to 
help with the falsifying of memory 
They are, 1 know, suspect; but 1 refuse 
to reject them entirely. On the other 
hand, I reject the finding of symbols in 
tea leaves and thrown apple peel, just as 
I reject horoscopes and crystal gazin 
But dreams are differe 
10 be approached with respect, 
After all, dreams as acts of precognition 
ave Biblical authority Joseph took 

(continued on page 178) 


some 


Ву ALDEN ERIKSON 


friends, romans, countrymen—let the revels begin! 


“Before we start, a few dos and don'ts 


171 


"Each year, my boy, I, Caesar, grant freedom to some worthy 
slave who has performed a noble sacrifice for the greater glory of Rome. Now then, 
do you see that old broad with the skinny legs over there by the punch bowl? 
Well, that old broad is Caesar's wife and nobody's laid a finger on her all night." 


“Well, at least it's not one of those dumb orgies where the men get 
together апа discuss politics and the girls just lie around and nibble grapes." 


172 


“Er, take five.” “Hi there, yourself!” 


“Don't feel guilty about it. What you're supposed to do at an 


orgy is cast off your inhibitions and do what you really want to do 
Well, it just so happens that what we really want to do is play тосе." 


173 


“How do you know you don’t 
dig fat, ugly guys? Did 
you ever make it with a fat, ugly guy?” “Don't be absurd, Senator— 
four feet, four isn't tiny!" 


“Well, boys and girls—it looks like a brand-new ball game." 


174 


"Hey—isn't that our baby sitter?” 


" Most orgies these days are a 
bore, but Lucillia's orgies are so camp." 


“I didn't make il with everybody, but anybody important I made it with twice.” 
[E s "S E 175 


176 


JON FINCH 
his hour upon the stage 


KING about acting bores me,” 
ictor Jon Finch. “Outside of 
I never give it too much 
м.” To audiences and c 
, the performances of this 
year-old British. bachelor have 
voked anything but boredom, and 
many are saying that the youngest 
thespian in screen history ever to 
play the lead in Macbeth—Roman 
Polanski's latest а а y Produc- 
tions’ first film—has a disu 
career belore him. Finch dr 
acting: he qualified at 18 for study 
at the prestigious London School of 
Economics, but opted for a stint in 
one of Britain's parachute regiments 
instead. Thereafter, a temporary job 
аз a stage manager near London led 
to production work with theater com- 
panies in London's West End. 71 had 
по real ambition to act,” Finch con- 
lesses, "but stage managing pressed 
me into understudying and direct- 
in 1907, he landed his 
айс part BBC tele- 
vision series Z Cars, TV ap 
pearances followed, in addition to 
supporting roles in two horror films, 
until 1969, when Finch stamed in 
his own TV series, Counterstrike, 
in which, he says, “L played some 
Milky Way alien trying to save the 
world from itsell Subsequently, a 
Frencheseries pilot and an acclaimed 
cameo in John Schlesinger’s Sunday 
Bloody Sunday led to his most chal- 
lenging assignment to date—Mac- 
beth. As the Scots warrior, Find: 
according to PLAYwoY Com- 
and Macbeth co- 
г superb 
young general in the prime of his 
condition who has thrown away his 
life in the space of a Tew seconds, by 
опе murderous act In the film, 
ach's first as a lead, he revealed 
ю cam 
more stawing roles: in Allred Hitch- 
cock's Frenzy and in sacenwriter- 
director Robert (4 Man jor АП 
Seasons) Воі historical film Lamb. 
Such success, in Shakespeare's words, 
сап be as evanescent as "a brief 
candle," or—as we'd like to think 
for Jon Finch—as lasting as а star. 


howev 


мо 


1 two 


ROGER PENSKE and MARK DONOHUE 
fast company 


row ых YEARS they've been one of U.S. auto racing's rare 
examples of harmonious and enduring teamwork—two me 
whose skills mesh as neatly as gears, producing that combina- 
tion of business, technical and driving abilities it takes to 
fi d field winning cars in any catego 
speed. Both on road courses and on oval tr 
1 variety of cars, Roger Penske and Mark. Donohue have 
become the dynamic duo of American motor sports. The 
two joined forces in 1966, after Penske had wrapped up a 
meteoric three-year professional driving career and stepped 
out of the cockpit to form a team, with Donohue soon be- 
coming number-one wheelman. Both had come up through 
the ranks of amateur road racers, knew car design and speed 
technology and believed in meticulous prerace preparation. 
Both are college graduates with degrees in engineering 
nd both are 35 this ye aske has had the savvy to 
parlay g into a mul m-dollar automotive empire 
of car dealerships and high-performance products—Roger 
Penske Racing Enterprises, headquartered in Newtown 
quare, near 

to prepare and pilot winning machines, Of the two, Penske is 
the extrovert—sociable and persuasive; Donohue is modest 
and friendly. in а quict way. For both men, this year's racing 
progi 1 be their toughest test. On the U. S. А.С. cham- 
pionship circuit, they're going alter the Indy 500, and the 
NASCAR Grand Nationals will be their first attempt at stock- 

icing. In the Can-Am road-race series, they're determined 
to unseat the dominant McLaren team with a hot new 12- 
cylinder Porsche, shown in the picture minus its skin, Cam- 
paigning in such diverse fields of racing may seem like trying 
to keep three wives happy at the same time: but if it’s pos- 
sible, Penske and Donohue look like the men who сап do it. 


nw 


ROD STEWART 
face in the crowd 


WEARING а swank faded pink silk suit that shines in the spot- 
hts he rasps into the mike with a voice that forces images 
of vocal cords shredding and ready to snap. ". . . Oh, Maggie, 
1 couldn't have tried anymore. . . " The crowd, fastest se 
e history of Madison Sq 
Stewart's back in town, He's billed as just another member of 
the Faces—but everybody's hungry for a new superstar and 
he's got too many good moves to avoid it. Onstage, he jumps 
е Jack Flash himself, baton-wwirling the chrome mike- 
stand, flamencostomping time like a rock^n'aoll. bullfighter. 
At 37, he's got his act down, and it didn't happen overnight. 
In the carly Sixties, he was more interested in soccer than 
in music—playing well enough to seriously consider offers 
to turn pro (a piece of his past that shows up in concert 
when he happily boots a few dozen soccer balls into the 
audience). Then, slightly Dylanstruck, he knocked. around 
Spain and France, playing banjo for folk singer Wiz Jones— 
landing uncelebrated back in London, his home town. 
icwart worked as a gravedigger for a while, moonlighting as 
harp player in a local band. He soon got into a full-time gig 
with John Baldry’s Steam Packet, but nobody heard much 
of him until Jal Beck, ex-bad boy Yardbird, picked him 
as lead singer for a loud, energetic group that lasted two 
years and let Stewart really find his style. After that one 
exploded in 1969, Rod drifted into the Faces and. since then, 
s, he’s just been playin’ in the band. But he casily 
Jed the top. male-vocalist slot in our 1972 Jazz & Pop Poll, 
and Rolling Stone recently named him rock star of the 
ува о whether he likes it or not, Rod Stewart, with a 
hoarse bluesy voice that 
and cigarettes, is whats filling places like 
the brim 


the Garde 
ing him much’ more than just another F 


PLAYBOY 


178 


PRECOGNITION 


Pharaoh's dream of the seven fat and 
seven lean kine ver 

The two great classical writers on the 
g of dreams were Synesius and 
Artemidorus. In one travestied form or 
another, their guides to the reading of 
dream events and dream symbols have 
persisted among the superstitious and 
unlearned for nearly 2000 years. When 
I was a boy, it was customary for the 
whole family to consult, after a busy 
t's dreaming, a popular book based, 
Шу discovered, on the Oneiro- 
Artemidorus his told us that 
to dream of a cat meant that an enemy 
was sharpening his claws, but a dog 
meant that friends were coming to visit 
us. A journey meant death; a swarm of 
bees meant money. Dreams thus repre 
sented a series of cryptograms that had 
to be decoded, The assumption that 
dreams are symbols rather than pictures 
of acmality has been in existence a long 
time—all thc ms in the Old Testa- 
ment, for example. 
dreams are still symbols 
йин in the Lite 19905 an à 
demonstrate that dreams could be plain 
prewgnitive experiences. 

This was J. W. Dunne, who wrote a 
look called An Experiment with Time. 
His starting point was a peculiarly viv 
dream of his own, which he dreamed 
miles from anywhere in what was once 
the Orange Free State of South Africa. 
The fact of his isolation, the apparent 
lack of g motivation for his 
dream, must be regarded as important. 


seriously indeed. 


as J eve 


critics of 


dre 


пу wal 


(continued from page 170) 


c standi 


He scemed to E is on a hill or 
mountain with litle fissures in its sur 
face, amd jets of vapor were spouting 
upward from these. fi He became 
aware that he was on а volcanic island 
and that it was going to blow up. He 
knew that there were 4000 inhabitants 
in peril, and he tried to persuade the au- 
thorities to evacuate them before the catas- 
traphe happened. This was the dicam. 
Some days later, Dunne 
copy of an English newspaper that c 
ried a long report of the explosion of the 
volcano. Mount Pelée on the island. of 
Martinique. The commercial capital of 
the island, Saint Pierre, was totally de- 
suoyed and 40,000 people were killed. 
Dunne. reading the paper rapidly, mis- 
took the figure 40,000 for 4000 and only 
saw his ake when he read the news 
item again some 13 years later. The 
point he makes book is that his 
dream was a precognitive dramatization 
of his reading the paper; his mind had 
not been transported to the event, only 
to the experience of taking in a report of 
the event. He misread a figure in fact; 
his d anticipating this, dramatized 
the error. 
nother of Dunne's dreams found 
him on а path between two fields that 
were fenced off by high iron railings. In 
the field on his left, a solitary horse 
seemed to have gone berserk, but the 
railings prevented its getting out and 
sacking the dreamer. But then, in the 
nner of dreams, the horse made an 
nexplicable escape and pursued Dunne 


ures. 


received a 


"am, 


“Scram! 1 don't need any help from 
a male-chauvinist pig!” 


down the path at high speed. Dunne 
ran madly toward a flight of wooden 
steps rising from the path, and then, on 
a diff hanger, the dicam ended. The 
following day, Dunne went fishing with 
his brother, While they were casti 
their lines in the river, Dunne's brother 
pointed out the erratic behavior of 4 sol- 
itary horse in а field. Everything was 
much as in the dream—fences, path, even 
wooden steps—but Dunne, after recount- 
ing the dream to his brother, thought he 
was эше in saying: “AL vate, this 
hoe cannot get out." Nevertheless, as 
inexplicably as in the dream, it did. lt 
galloped down the path toward the 


for the Dunne brothe 
urally. frightened, But at the last moment, 
the horse decided not to attack them; it 
merely shorted and thundered off down 
the road. 

These two dreams are Dunne's most 
impressive examples of alleged. precog- 
nition. Encomaged by them, he began 
to record all his dreams immediately on 
ng and then to look for evidence 
that they were composed of future as 
well as past events. Naturally, he was 
anxious to confirm his theory that 
dreams have precognitive power, and it 
was inevitable that he should discount 
coincidence, arity of past and 
future experience, the tendency of the 
mind—quite unintentionally—to reshape 
memory to its own ends, We have all, I 
think, had dreams like Duune's, but we 
have rarely had enough of them to make 
us want to shrug off the shrugging-off 
word coincidence, 

On the night of November 20, 1963, 
I was in a hotel room in Tenerife in the 
Canary Islands, Reading the Spanish 
epic of the Cid before sleep, 1 was 
struck by the line “Assis, parten unos 
Wotros, сотто la ийа de la carne.” The 
Cid is leaving his wife and daughters: 
"They part from each other as the nail 
parts. from the flesh." When 1 went to 
sleep, 1 dreamed about this linc; it 
found visual expression in a vivid image 
of a public man being torn from his wife 
by killers. 1 was aware that the wife's 
name began with J and that the hus- 
band, just before his 
grected by a cheering crowd as “Kid.” 
No trouble the “Kid” was a facetious 
Anglicization of "Cid," and the wile of 
EL Cid was Doña Jimena. When I got 
back to nd a couple of days later, 
lat once switched the television on and 
immediately got the shocking news from 
Dallas. 1 remembered the dream, 
dered about it, bur had to conclude that 
it was not really precognitive. It could 
be explained entirely in terms of my 


the sin 


assassi 


ation, was 


won- 


reading 
"his. 1 recog 
troduce the 


the moment to in- 
me of Jeane Dixon. who 


ze, i 


© 1971 A..REYHOLDS TOBACCO COMPANY. WINSTON-SALEM, K.C, 


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179 


PLAYBOY 


ned nor only the glum privilege 


that ghastly event 


gion restaurant) 


but also a gener bility 10 predict 


thshaking eens. Ive read Ruth 
Montgomery's popular book about he 

A Gift of Prophecy—and have been put 
off by the saccharine religiosity of Mrs. 


Dixon's ambiance, as well as by the me 
odramatic Montgomery prose. There are 
more things in heaven and carth—l 
know, I know, but my taste goes for the 
scientific test, the cold, indisputable 
record. I fear that hindsight, especially 


when clouded with powerful emotion, 


too often sees wl wants 


ıt imputing insincerity to Mrs. Dixon's 
igh-placed admirers. but I am suggest- 


аҳ overmuch credul 
her predictions were pretty. safe 
1904 


years between and 1967 a 


riod of great mal 
жеге; what y . won 
be? Both the Pope and Lyndon B. John 


‚хай Mrs. Dixon, "vulnerable to 
great personal danger" Who isn't in 
these violent days? T find something lu- 
dicrous also in the elephant and donkey 
trumpeting and braying in Mrs. Dixon's 
crystal ball, as though the American po- 
litical emblems were a pair of eternal 
Her poli 


son wei 


constellation: 


have 


the shrillness of cheap. jot 
hey cry out to be ignored, even when 
they prove accurate. No, Im not con- 


vinced by Mrs. Dixon. She seems to belong 
to а remote superstition, in which 
gullibility is elevated far above decent 
human skepticism. And now let me get 
back to dreams. 

I'm the less anxious to accept visions 
that appear to foretell American wag 
edies because of the results of an inves 
rried out in March 1932. The 
Andbergh baby had just been kidnaped 
and, before the body was found, a team 
of parapsychologists put. advertisements 
in the newspapers asking for dreams 
about the kidnaping. There were over 
1300 replies. When the body was d 
covered —inaked, mutilated. in a shallow 
wood oll à road—the di 
ly compared with the facts. 
Only seven dreams gave the location in 
а wood, the nakedness, the manner. of 
the burial; and of the seven, only the 
following came close to the reported 
reality 


grave in 


з 


were carefi 


T thought 1 was standing or w: 
ing in a very muddy place among 
trees, One spot looked as though it 
might be a round shallow grave. Just 
then I heard a voice saying, “The 
baby has been murdered and buried 
there” 1 was so fr 
immediately awoke. 


180. Out of 1300 dreams, this doesn’t represent 


much of a score. It's this sort of census 


that tends to Kill stone-dead our interest 
in the subject of dream precognition. 
But J. W. Dunne’s enthusiasm waxed 


and eventually led to а time philosophy 
fluence on cer- 
a the Thirties. J. B. 
. for instance, presented in 
three stage plays а view of time as a si- 
multancous continuum; and this—be- 


m 
Dunnc's 
the idea was this: Time is not 
dimension but a series of d 
u, D, © and so оп. Habit condi 
to remain on one dimension of time. But 
if we climb off it onto another dimen- 
sion, we can look down on the whole 
stretch of the one we have quitted, 
seeing past, present and future as a sin- 
gle landscape. The spatial metaphor is 
convenient. Dunne suggested that our 
traditional approach to time is that of a 
man rowing a boat down a river. He 
moves forward looking bäck. He sees 
where he has come from but cannot, be- 
ause of his propulsive technique, see 
where he is going. Change the boat for 
n aircraft and the entire river of time is 
laid out. simultaneously, below him. We 
have to discard old time-traveling hab- 
its, along with old spatial ones. Dreams, 
which are free from the restrictions of 
conscious thought, seem to show us the 


ensions— 


ions us 


way. 
Many of us will still feel inclined, de- 
spite Dunne’s persuasive mathematics, 


to object with Dr. Tanagras that we 
can't sce what hasn't yet happened. But 
theologians counter the objection by 
telling us that, if God is omniscient, God 
new all about Geng Shake- 
spear, Beethoven, the Lindbergh t 
edy, the Second World War, the rise and 
ll of the Beatles, the Kennedy 
the marriage of his widow 10 Onassis, 
the Nixon-Red China entente, even the 
worn keys of this typewriter long be 
fore He made Adam and Eve. But how 
about free will, the power of human 
choice? This presumably means that 
God knows all the numerous alternatives 
that face us when we contemplate ас 
tion, but He doesn't force us to choose 
one rather than another; divine lore 
knowledge doesn’t mean divine tampe 
ig. On the other hand, our individual 
natures compel us to take one course 
ther than another, and God knows all 
about our individual natures, It's possi- 
ble, then, that the whole pattern of each 
individual life has long bee down 
what we 
have to do is to conduct it. This gives us 
plenty of scope with regard to tempo 
nd expression, but the work remains 
the work. 


We needn't, of course, b 
this at all. A strong smell of determinism 


comes from the  physicistastronomers, 
who tell us that our. world is exactly 

produced in other galaxies and that 
the score has, perhaps, long been played 
there and long forgotten, or that the 
concert has not yet even been announced 


o the future may, as Dunne argues, be 
simultaneous with the present and the 
past. Precognition is all too possible; or, 
wher, precognition does not really ap- 
ply: То see the future may be like seeing 
through a closed door—an аа of here- 
and-now dairvoyance—or it may be an 
act of memory. How about deje 
feeling of “I've been here before”? If 
you seem to recognize the present as a 
kind of past, that means you once 
the present as a kind of future—perhaps 
in a subconsciously remembered dream 
parapsychologists 
are taking precognition as seriously as 
ESP or PK (except, of course, in the 
cvileye regions); but they are not yet 
inclined о pay much attention to 
dreams, waking visions or the ambigu- 
ous noises made by oracles. These 
things are too subjective, too easily re- 
vised by a failure of memory or gilded 
by prejudice. Laboratory work is undra- 
matic and. plodding: it has to be. But it 
is so hedged about by antihuman-error 
devices that its findings are believed to be 
totally reliable, There is no room for the 
skept proper to a va le perform- 
ance by the G aza. Let us 
ake a 
a better precognitive ree 
п Miss Johnson. 

Miss Johnson was the chief experi- 
mental subject of Professor G. N. M. Tyr- 
rell. To test her predictive powers, he 
contrived an apparatus consisting of five 
boxes with lids, each containing a small 
electric lamp. Mi front of 
these boxes, cut off from view by a large 
screen, Wires ran from the five lamps to 
five switches on Professor Tyrrell's desk. 
The object of the exercise was to see if 
Miss Johnson could predict—half a sec 
ond before the depressing of the key— 
which lamp would light A buzzer 
sounded, Miss Johnson lifted the lid of 
the box that she thought would be illu- 
minated, then Professor Tyrrell worked 
а random switch. The opening of the 
box automatically drew a line on paper. 
A successful choice produced a double 
line, There w: a the clec 
wical circuit that kept changing the con- 
nections between switches and lamps: 
Professor Tyrrell never knew which lamp 
he to light. Miss Johnson 
opened a 
guessing at the right result would have 
given her 451 hits (a fifth of the пит 
of trials); in fact, she got 88 more th: 


n 


b 


Johnson sat i 


a commutator 


“It isn't nice to fool with Mother Nature!” 


181 


PLAYBOY 


182 


that—539. The odds ag 
ing are 270,000 to I. 


nst this happen- 


matician S. G. Soal 
P cards—25 to a pack, divided 
imo five sets of symbols: square, ci 
Че, star, cross and waves. He was skep- 
tical about obtaining results that should 
te the possibility of precos 
ndeed, a number of years’ expe 
n confirmed his skepticism. But 
rd about what are called 
wb began to look 
The displacement 
Ifor 


indica Lion 


mentat 


he hi "dis- 


placement. effects 


back over his data. 


doctrine teaches that, 
1 ESP guessing session, a subject 
ng for rhe target card will some 


in a strai 


times n al choose the card imme- 
preceding or following. Basil 
Shackleton, one of Soal's star subjects. 


was found to "displace" his guesses 
preity consistently: He found it casier to 
ess the next card than to guess the 
inmediate target one. When the dealing 
of the cards was speeded up, Shackleton 
shifted his displacement a couple of 
cards ahead; it was as though his mind 
had established a rigid time relation, In 
7 calls, he made 236 hits, agai 


mean chance expectation. of 158.8. The 
odds against this happening are about 
100,000 to 1. 

These experiments have been so scaled 
off from the possibility of collusion, 
man even ordinary clairvoyance 
(which deals only in the here and now), 
1 ло condude that pre- 
ition seems a proven. fact. The ex- 
amples Гуе given may seem tame: "There's 
no prediaion beyond a second or 
there's uo spectacular. foretel 
100-10-1 winner in the next race. Yer the 
very pedestrian quality is more convincing 
than widescreen Technicolor stulf. Where 
do we go from here? We can perhaps look 
with a more credulous eye on our own 
tpparent bouts of prevision or nod more 
at other people's stories of how they were 
warned in dıcams not to settle at Peal 
Harbor in 1941. But we ought really to 
be led to a greater sningency in selectin; 


error, 


ihe nu 
knowing that people lie without knows 
it and that hearsay is not evide 
parently, the Miss 
Shackleton of the laboratory experiments 
people genuinely endowed with an 
exceptional ability for secing ahead. Other 


precognition trom the phony, 


hea 


Johnson 


“Thank heaven for no-fault insurance!” 


people who claim such gifts should be 
believed only when they have submitted 
to a similar dull treadmill of tests. That 
sounds repressive and spoilsport, but is 
there any other way? 

‘The trouble with most of us is that, 
wanting to be previsionaries, we're not 
concerned with widening the boundaries 
of psychological knowledge; what is it 
to us if we score 236 out of 794 in a 
card test? What we want is a gilt that 
will est itself consistently in every- 
day life—to our own advantage, not 
the advantage of science. IE were not 
horn with the gift, how can we Jearn to 
acquire it? There seems to be no easy 
way. Psychodelic drugs (allow me to be 
pedantic “Psychede | impossi- 
ble spelling) ate supposed to open up the 
mind, but they certainly don’t open up 
the furure, Instead of lifting you above 
time, enabling you to look down on it 
from a pressurized cabin. they just wipe 
out time altogether. Concentration of 


the mind is probably пеейе 1 ESP 
and PK. Dissolution may let The 
round of All Being in, but not the 


name of your next President. 

A lighthearted novel by Robert Graves 
Antigua Penny Puce—lightheartedly 
suggests one precognitive technique that 
1 myself have used with modest success. I 
‚ of course, in connection with the 
horses. You close your eyes and in 
the sporting pages in tomorrow's 
paper. First of all. practice on today’s, 
looking at it often and imprinting its ap- 
pearance on your inward eye. Then, hay- 


mea 


w 


news- 


ing established its general format, change 


its date to tomonow’s: See the date at the 
top of the page. Then caich the rest of the 
sports news off its guard. Move your vi- 
sionary eye down and read tomorrow's 
headlines. There, п; ly, you will find 
tomonow’s winners. ames may be 
somewhat garbled, but you сап check 
them with today's list of runners. Now 
call your bookmaker, put your money on 
and await the result with confidence. I 
know no other way ol achieving success 
on the horses. 

As for the other things in life, leave 
those 10 the great organs of prediction— 
the meteorological offices, the economic 
burcaus, the computerized pollsters, the 
historiographers. Inference from the 
past is as good a way as апу of getting 
at the future, and the techniques of in- 
ference are growing better every day. 
The unpredictable things are best left 
unpredictable, Women, for instance. 
Whether you're going t0 die tomorrow. 
You may take me that precogni- 
tion is a known fact—eall Durham, North 
Carolina, and have a chat with the people 
at the Psychical Research Foundation, if 
you're still incredulous, and then sit back 
and let the future do its own veil.break- 
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PLAYBOY 


184 


из of 
ар: There were r 
floor and genuine oil paintings—paint- 
ed by hand—on the walls. The curtains 
were of the most gossamer of silk and all 
the furniture had been dusted. The A 
cock Tid gazed his fill with gratifica 
and delight. He vowed that somed, 
dint of hard work and perseverance, he 
would dwell in a palace such as this 
and, in addition, he wen 


M. possess a dog. 

As Mrs. Baldershank exited from the 
kitchen € ing milk а a small glass 
of a green liquid on a silver salver, Our 
Hero had an opportunity 10 observe the 
grace of her carriage and the sinuous 
ness of her movements. Despite her ad- 
vanced age, there was a sprightliness 
about her fi е, 

Chauncey leaped to his fect as the 
lady approached, even as he had been 
hı by his dear moth He took the 
ss of milk from the proffered y and 
waited until the lady ed herself. on 
the couch before he took his seat at the 


ing 
ng herself considerably closer to 
“I like zat in a boy. Tell me, are 
you aware of what iz in ziz packahge you 
have delivered to me? 

ME his life, Chaunc 


Alcock had 


thed 
lthough in this case he 
pied to follow the 
Discretion is the bene 
the babits of his young 
nied, and he replied, 


came to him 
God's а 
was moment 
poets advice 
port of valo 
life could not be di 


‚апа 


ware." 
. Baldershank said sor- 
down at her soupcon 
een liquid, "I am a 
She looked up sud- 
imo Chauncey's clear, 
1 uzt you месі not 
think the lezz of me for that? 
“Dear lady/" the youth said. manfully, 
“I have been & хі from. birth never 


rowfully. lookin 
(small shot) of 
divorzed 
d 


“Beal it!” 


to scorn another's infirmity. You have 
my deepest sympathy. 


Zank you,” she murmured, 


You arc 


K his milk, which was. 


grade A, while Mus. Balder- 
nodestly from her minus- 
Then she set it on the 


table (fashioned of real glas) 
and leaned toward Chauncey. She placed 
а warm hand upon his knee. 

"You zee,” she said, honesty and е 
hestness obvious in every syllable, "ve 
lulled cach other but he was а louz 
lay." 


had bec nd he was 
innocent of the nuances (shticks) of adult 
behavior 

Mis. Baldershank moved her hand up- 
ward from Chauncey’s knee and gripped 
his hard, youthful i iportunately 
Oh. Chaunze," she moaned audibly, 
"Iam zo lonczome." 

The boy, whose heart was so generous 
that he could not hear of another's 
torment without genuine tears rising 
to his eyes, leaned toward the suller- 
ing woman. “Courage” he whispered. 


eft lady's tears matched his 
drop for diop, and her head drooped 
upon his boad shoulder as her hand 
moved upward from his thigh and 
ipped him with the despairing grasp 
forlorn wom: 
Mon Dien [Wow 
cet be? Iz ziz de trat? 
Chauncey cast his eyes down chastely. 
“I am fortunately endowed," he 
knowledged, with none of the brag that 
ht be expected from a youth of crud- 
er mold. “I trust it does not offend yo 
Au contraire [Are you kidding? 
she laughed me 
She sar aed and swiftly unzipped 
his trousers. Incapable of responding to 
this totally unexpected and somewhat 
unnerving gesture, Chauncey could only 
sit quietly and retain what dignity he 
could in these unforeseen circumstances, 
When his prize was revealed. in 
its splendid sy у, Mrs. Baldeisl 
could do nothing but gape at the object 
th astonishment. She seemed dan 
ously close to a swoon, 
“Formidable [Formidable]," she whis- 
pered. "Never ‘ave D zeen zuch а" 
Bur at that moment, even as her trem- 
ulous fingers timorously touched that 
which had excited her wonder and imi 
п, there was а burst of music from 
the strect below; a bras band struck. up 
the stirring stains of The Stars and 
Stripes Forever. 
“Tis the parade anncey shout- 
ed, jumping to his fect. "Please, Mrs. 


she gasped, 


у. 


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PLAYBOY 


186 


Baldersh: y we watch the proceed- 
ings from your window facing Central 
Park West, where, I believe, the specta- 
cle will be clearly discernible?” 

She xose unsteadily and the wo 
moved to a wide window overlooking 
the thoroughfare, where they had 
excellent view of the exciting activities. 

Mis. Baldershank, with the genile- 
manly assistance of Chauncey Alcock, 
raised the window, affording an unob- 
structed survey of the scene. She leaned 
forward and projected her head and shoul- 
ders from the fenestration, Behind her, 
Chauncey in his eagerness pressed close 
to sec the colorful ceremony being en 
acted on the street below 

"Trés bien [That feels good] she 
murmured and kindly reached around 
with both arms so that her hands might 
grasp Chaunceys hips and pull him 
doser to her, thus offering him 
mproved view. 

At the moment, 
all sexes was paradi 
holdin 
nid DOWN WITH St 
потљос тах and other firmly held be- 
liefs. Following them came a 1 
that was enthusiastically essaying the 
opening movement (andante) of Sam 
Ranowski's Fugue for a Piccolo and 
Three Cellos. Young Alcock noted a 
certain amount of preliminary disorder 


up signs that read FREEDOM Now 


ass band 


there appeared to be several organiza- 
tions dashing back and forth, infiltrating 
one another, grabbing opposing banners, 
flags and placards, setting up various 
chants, He clearly heard such shouted 
opinions as "Gay is gorgeous” and “Black 
will overcome.” Indeed, at onc point, 
shrill feminine screams of "Down with 
penis envy!" and similar sentiments rent 
the air and he saw two guardia 
peace wade into the parade wi 
cheons risin 

“из just bully! 
tically to Mr 

“Oui [Yes]. 
suactedly, and 


he shouted enthu 
Baldershank. 

the lady muttered 
so engrossed was the 
pure-minded lad with the agitation on 
the street that he cely aware thi 
his hostess, still bending over the win- 
dow sill, had demurely parted her neth- 
er limbs, flipped up the hem of her 
cerise gown and with practiced fingers 
guided his engorged cudgel into that 
sweet grotto that is more precious than 
life itself. 

“А coup sûr [Isn't this fur 
cried, and Chauncey agreed, 
doser to and straining 
shoulder to observe the mer below. 

"Mon cher [This is gre ” Mm 
Baldershank gasped, wriggling with de- 
light as more confused companies of 
paraders and bands struggled by, the 
marchers chanting militant slogans and 


аһ- 


she 
pressing 
over her 


her 


imer 


7, 
б 


2, dear, Snow White was not a ‘groupie. ” 


struments, 

“I do so love a parade," 
yelled in the lady's e: 
noise had risen and he fe 
not take his meaning. 

In fac, the confu engen- 
dered noise of such amplitude that Ms. 
Baldershank was able to communicate 
nly by gestures, grunts and bodily 
movements, all of which served them in 
ood stead. Chauncey was happy to sce 
t her delight in the parade was ch- 
scemed 
tification and he was 


Chauncey 
since the level of 


red she ht 


n now 


th 
viously greater than his, for sh 


in a rapture of ; 


forced t0 g 
shtly below the w 
herself from the window i 
of joy. 

But then, 
was attempti 


p her hips, respectfully, 


sli ‚ lest she launch 


even as a pas 


igh and seemed to collapse across 
dow sill. Showing great presence 
of mind and no inclination. to 
(characteristics that 
Chauncey Alcock well in the many er 
that lay ahead in bis eventful life), the 
youth held her firmly and, still c 
ed intimately, supported her limp 
ack into the room. 
"Chaunze," she 
Chaunze." 

"Yes" he smiled agreeably, "it is a 
marvelous parade. But 1 fear I may tarry 
то longer. My dear mother has prepared 
a nourishing repast of stuffed turnips 
and, although she has undoubtedly ab 
ready dined, 1 am cerrain she awaits m 
return with il-concealed anticipation. 
And so, ma 

But, much to when 
Chauncey Alcock attempted to dien 
gige from the person of Миз. Yverte 
Baldershank, it proved impossible, and 
c offered a small shrik, crying, 
“Zul [lt hurts] looking back over her 
shoulder with such a piteous glance that 
the poor ай» heart was stricken. 

“What seems to be the difficulty?" he 
red. 


panic 


were to serve 


scs 


ect 
ly 


murmured. “Oh, 


his dismay 


re zhtuck!” she 
“Do not pull, I beg of you, lezt I be 
turned inzide out, Oh, Chaunzey. what 
are we to d 

The youth with gentle movements 
ied once again to extrac his empur 
pled lance fiom the Mystic Cavern; but 
in spite of spirited contortion on the 
part of both particip all was 10 no 


exclaimed, 


they remained glued тошт 
Chaunceys front to the back of the 
pinon of Feldhausen’s Drugstore, his 


Тасе buried in her f 
“We must re 


agrant hair. 
1 сайт” the boy de 
cided after some deliberation, for even 
at his early age, he had learned the value 
ol that motto of one of America’s great 
et and most prestigious corporations: 


"Think" “I suggest" he offered. after 
deep and silent cogitation, “that we seck 
medical advice and assistance.” 

“Eggvellem,” Mrs. Baldershank gasped. 
^I fave joost the man—my family doctair. 
He is vary understanding and joost up 
Central Park Wert.” 

With great difficulty, and a brief. yelp 
of bliss from the lady, the two struggled 
to their feet and stood à moment in file, 
closely pressed, spoon fashion. 
fa'am," gested difi- 
dently, "might | suggest we start out on 
the right foot? By that means, 
as one four-legged person, as it wi 
believe we may achieve locomotion.” 

“Thees doctair does not make houze 
calls. We must go to hees olfeece!" 

Chauncey Alcock nodded understand- 
ingly, his keen brain racing as he ap- 
praised the situation, "The difficult I 
сап do immediately he murmured 
thoughtfully. “The impossible takes a 
little long 

Like all great schemes in the history 
of the human race, it was simplicity 
ested they walk, in 
lock step. out to the elevator. descend to 
the street and. join the confused. parade 
still passing the door of the luxury 
apartment house in which she dwelt. So 
grcat was the hubbub, Chauncey argued 
cogently, to say nothing of the stramash, 
that their unconventional Siamese-twins 


"s, moving 


el 


itself. Chauncey su 


position would scarcely be noted, and 
might proceed to the physician's 
office by parading north on Central Park 
West to 83rd Street, a stroll of a mere 
dozen short blocks 

Mrs. Baldershank readily agreed to 
Chauncey's plan as being Ше best solu- 
tion to a difhcult quandary 

Having gained access to the street, 
and hence to the parade, they im 
ately joined the at the 
mome ly. Te 
zation formed 


edi- 


oup passi 


t and were welcomed wi 


appeared to be an oig 


for the purpose of repeal 
tive laws dealin 
Their ch е, love is 
peace, love is peace!” made the welkin 
ring: and as they moved uptown, Mis. 
Baldershank and Chauncey Alcock joined 
in the chant with a right good will. 

Al proceeded expeditiously, the two 
striding smartly in compact cadence, as 
required by their unfortunate. physical 
pickle, when suddenly disaster struck. 
The organization immediately following 
the "Love is peace!” group was com- 
posed of motley individuals, many of 
whom wore hard plastic helmets of the 
type favored by construction workers to 
protect their skulls from falling objects. 
This company, whose philosophy and 
platform were not made entirely clear 
by their banners, set up an answering 


g all vestric- 
with illicit fornication. 


t “Love ds pe 


dhant of “Continence forever! 
out the repeated “Love is peace 
the preceding aggregation. 

In a twinkling, all became. confusion 


to drown 
cry of 


and exploding violence. The “Conti 
nence forever!” people invaded the 
ranks of the "Love is peace!" adher 


ents and soon shouts of anger and fury 
could be heard, signs were being swung, 
individual and 
the p: ed into an imbra 
glio of flying fists and whipping 1 
interspersed with the shouts and whistles 


assaults were Liuniched. 


de degene 


ners, 
of policemen who immediately waded 
into the riot and he 
h their truncheons i 
to restore law and order 

Now occurred a f incident tl 
illustrates, as perhaps nothing th 
gone before can do as well, the exem 
plary character and lofty ideals of Feld- 
hausen's delivery boy. 

To one side of Chauncey, a stout 
gentleman with muttonchop whiskers, 
member of the “Love is peace!” group. 
was carrying ап American fag attached 
to a wooden pole. Struck on the temple 
by what appeared to be a loaded shop- 
ping bag wielded by a lachrymose female 
constituent of the “Continence forever!” 

ization, the flag-bearer's eyes glazed, 
ined with pain and released his 
hold on the flagstaff. Old Glory be; to 


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PLAYBOY 


188 


ll and was in dire danger of touching 
the ground! 

Sizing up the alarming situation in a 
h, Chauncey Alcock leaped forward 
movement that educed a short moan 
of ecstasy from. Mrs. Baldershank—and 
snatched up the stall ere the Stars and 
ripes be sullied beneath the feet of 
maddened rioters. “Thereupon the 
d dad hoisted the Splendid 

high and urged his partner. 
to redouble her ellorts as he sought to 
press clear of the surrounding tumult. 

F ling free of the ma 
sae parades and joyous | 
Mrs. Baldershank and Chauncey 
ained the sidewalk at S?nd Street and 
went rui is fast as their linked four 
legs could take them, their four 
igh. the Glorious Devic 
in the 
conduct 


the 


men. 


knees 


E 

Their 
inspired 
1 show 
that 


rising h 
pi 
curious 
from | 
cd comments ol 
have no place in this accom 

What this tale may be 
reported in short order. Fortunately, the 
outer office of Dr. Ramon Perdidio was 
occupied by only three patients. Placing 
ОМ Glory and its stall carefully in the 


breeze above them. 


once more 
ssers-by amazed stares 
coarse n: 


ше 


remains of 


umbrell k, Chauncey Alcock sank 
thankfully into a comfor 
Mrs. Bakdershank in hi 


ents. 
у. the nurse smiled at the wait- 
ing twosome and said, “Doctor will see 
you now. 

Dr. Perdidio sized up their predici 
ment in асе and, using the most 
advanced | technique developed 
at one of America’s great research cen- 
ters, requested both to step outside onto 
the fire escape that adjoined his office 
window. There he doused them with a 
bucket of ice-cold water. They immedi- 
tely separated, with a shudder, and 
went back to the nurses desk, where, 
chipping, they were presented with a 
ather substantial bill for i 
ices ven d. Fa ately, jt ow 
ered by Chau bscription to Blue 


medica 


medi 


© 


lei cov- 


)cey's 


ever, before this happy ending 
was concluded, Dr. Ramon Perdidio had 
opportunity to observe the 
most outstinding feature of Chauncey 
Alcock's manly physique. 

“Por Dios |Gee|^ (he. good 
exclaimed and asked the Jad’ per 


doctor 
sion 


“I paid for half the evening. Don't I deserve 
something more than a goodnight kiss?” 


to summon his colleagues from nearby 
edical suites to view the phenomenon 
The Alcock boy modestly agreed. feel 
ing that he must do what he could to 
further the cause of medical knowledge 
Soon he was surrounded. by examining 
physicians, nurses, Laboratory technicians 
amd elevator operators, all of whose 
wonder knew no bounds. Measurements 
were made with a yardstick, 
determined o postage scale (ISG 
the firstckiss rate) and Pol 
graphs were taken from a variety ol 
angles. Dr. Perdidio declared his inten 
tion of writing a monograph on the 
subject to be published im the profes- 
sional journal Strange Medical Facts of 
Masuehusetts, Parcuthetically, it may be 
noted that several of the (female) nurses 
glances of envy on Mrs, Balder 
few even murmured con- 


weight was 


и 
roid photo- 


gratulations into the ladys ear, all of 
which she accepted graciously 
Миу. Baldershank and Chauncey Ak 


Is firmly outside the doc- 
tors office building. The parade and riot 
had ended: all was at peace along the 
great thoroughfare that cut its way 
through the pulsing hi 
ing city. 


cock shook hi 


t of the teem- 


dy lad 
Whenever 
from Feldh: 


must be made 
, E shall be 


delivery 
епз Drugstor 


available,” the youth declared stoutly 
And so Our Нео, Cl Alcock, 
wended his way homeward, fecling the 
im honest day's labor 


He resolved to 
тес on the morn. In 
truth, it had been a am day, chock-full 


of activity, and he yearned for the peace 
and security of his own home. 

His dear mother, Mrs. Alcock, 
already retired when he arrived, and 
Chauncey moved softly while hening up 
supper of stulled turnips, 


had 


his nourishii 


so as nor to disturb her. Fortunately, the 
following day was Saturday. so that it 
was nor necessary 10 prepare. homework 
for school. But, in order that the eve 
ning would be a total los, the 
mbitious lad read three. pages ol Tide 
Tables for Norfolk, Portsmouth and En- 
virons before bathing and slipping into 
his idle bed. 

He was about to extinguish the 1 
when his dear mother roused and called 
fom the adjacent Dhauncey 
dear she inquired, remem- 
ber iblut r 
pajam 


not 


room. 
“did you 
dom 


ere ya 


yo 


ons 


did. indeed, Mother mine,” Chaun- 
cey replied. cheerfully, "for 1 know. full 
well that cleanliness is next to godliness.” 
And with ıl 
spok 
che 


the brave, resolute lad. 


his prayers and slipped 


less sleep. 


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E 


PLAYBOY 


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PLAYBOY FORUM 


the preconvierion condemnation of his 


alleged Decko took his life at 
the age of 31 on November 30, 1971, in 
Ми. Carroll, Шой 


It is ironic to note that Decko was 
never convicted of the crime of which 
he was Changed and, in fact, was d 
ity of the stat. 
vagueness and 
wound that 


ute on 
breadth, 


grounds of 
the 


long time before we ever know the 
court's position on that statute. Tt is 
apparent that the powers that be in She 
с only interested in extract- 
pound of desh from James 
now dismissed 
p ampson, the co- 
ndant charged with the same offense. 
Peter Bjor 
Attorney at Law 
Sheboygan, Wisconsin 
The Playboy Foundation, which had 
committed. itself to help in this case, is 
grieved 10 learn of James Decko's death. 
There ave those in this country who think 
that puritanism is no longer an important 
issue and that the anti-sexual laws it has 
inspired ате mere curiosilies to be joked 
about. Tragedies such as this, however, 
show that puritanism is still a destructive 
force in the land. 


MASCULINE HOMOSEXUAL 

“Homos don't do muh hunting and 
fishing. you know. Theyre not outdoor 
types. We watched movies of him walk- 
ing... but hell, he didn't walk like a 
"© асай with astonishment those 

of Arkansas prosecutor ехе 
ning why he believed the victim of a 
shotgun slaying was not homosexual 
(Forum Nessfrout, December 1971), and 


T must write to you for my own peace of 
mind I a homosexual and I not 
only hui fish but have built my 


own sailbe n a member of a loci 
hleric dub and of the National Rifle 
Assoc I do not alk like a 


ns. Further- 
D have made advances t0 many 
of the age of those involved 
l the w 
response was negative. 
sorry for the man who 
killed, and, of course, I don't know 
whether or not he was homosexual, but 
I do feel that if such crude, stereotyped 
thinking represents the mental level of 
iw enforcement those boss 


homo”™—whatever that mea 
more, 


ns. Tve sdom to 
k off when th 


аге 
е ds gres 
and awarene 
(Name and address 
withheld by request) 


PLAYBOY'S TAINTED MONEY 

Regarding the National Or 
for Women's rejection of the РЁ 
Foundation’s offer of assistance (The 


(continued from page 72) 


Playboy Forum, January), it is possible 
that the members of NOW, like most 
crusaders, feel they need to be 
oppressed in order to succeed. To accept 
support. [rom а source they consider op- 
posed to NOW'S ideals would w 
that sense of oppression. Furthei 
ihe group's rank and file m 
suspicious that the leaders can't r 
being beholden to those they call sexists. 


mora 


Possibly, therefore, PtivmoY could 
help NOW more by attacking the organ 


down its ideals and 
lers, Then the Бу 
Foundation could use its funds for simi- 
lar orgs ns that would be glad to 
have the money. 


ization, 


running 


Philip H. Lincoln 
London, England 


HEFNER AND UNDERSHAFT 

aith Seidenberg of the National Or- 
ganization lor We 
Playboy Found. 


“One thing about youngsters! participating 
the smoke-filled rooms sure 


in women’s rights cases, with the words, 
“We hold the Playboy Club and all it 
stands for in such contempt, that 10 а 
money from the foundat 
same 


me would only contan 
Scidenbeig should bone up on her George 
Bernard Shaw. In his play Major Bar 
bara, Shaw makes it plain that money 
whether or not it seems tainted. is capii- 
ng good. Andrew Undershatt, 
ob the Largest muni- 

поре, ollers 
major in di 

any, to help feed, dothe 
s. At first, Barbara refuse 


tion 
to his daughter Barba 


Salvation ^ 
shelter ind 


because she considers her father's money 
to be tainted. It is only when she n 


tions such as 
ust depend on the 
Пу 


izes that org: 
Salvation Army 
Undershalts ol this world that she 1 
matures. 

Similarly, NOW would have no cause 
бо feel the Playboy 
J helped. one 
n abortion or achieve salary 
SOW is going to 


contamin 


Foundation's 
woman get 
equality with men. If 


in. politics— 
smell different.” 


189 


PLAYBOY 


190 


turn down assistance from organizations 
such as the Playboy Foundation, just 
where does it expect to get funds? From 
legislators. who are constantly slashing 
Federal and state budgets? From middle 
Americans who think of the women's 
rights movement as а collection of kooks, 
Commies and Lesbians? Not likely. 

It is to be hoped that Seidenberg and 
OW will grow up enough 10 learn to 
accept assistance when it is offered. 

Plc. Au 


THE HARDEST LAWS TO REPEAL 

1 completely agree with the male writ- 
ers who have argued in The Playboy 
Forum that a man should not be forced 
to pay alimony to а woman who is capi- 
ble of sell-support. However, as a divor- 
«се of five years, I have met many athe 
divorced women, and I wish to state that 
Je the stereotype of the elegant. lady 
living in luxury on royal alimony pay- 
ments may exist, she is extremely rare. 
majority of divorcees, like the 
great majority of the population, come 
from the lower or lower-middle c 
out of five, 1 would estim 
попу at all. 
ide from this, it is worth asking why 
a woman who is capable of self-support 


wo 
rich 
itable ve 


ld seek alimony. Most 
nough to make this a 
тшге. The truth is 
ex-wife, in most cases, is seeking re- 
venge. The reason for this is that she has 
been brainwashed from childhood on to 
woman's destiny is to marry 
and then to live happi 
out to be 
different from this fairy rale, the woman 
hurt, disillusioned, feels gı 
and bitter. The handy target fo 
these emotions is the ex-husband (al 
though а better target might be her 
1 nls, friends and the mass 
media, which have given her an unr 
view of the world). If girls were taught, 
like boys. to seek а career and take 
mariage И and when it seems wise 
divorce would be much less traumatic 
for them. Men who oppose the edu 


пеп are not 
ally prof- 
that the 


rents, s 


tional ideas ob the women’s liberation 
movement never seem to consider this 
side of the matter. 

Alimony, of course, is only side 


issue, l; 
husbands, 
The n 
ing too mucl 
is not paying enough (even if she 
inds that paying more would ruin 
c) Her life is a series of small 


cally. The real burden on cx- 
child support. 
s feels he 


n most 
ost al 


ases, 


s pay- 


the woman feels that he 


“1 take it you enjoyed the film.” 


heartbreaks, such as when the children 
next door (who have a full-time faiber) 
receive an extra goody that her child 
suppore won't allow her to give 
. Also, the money is 
h to allow her to hire 
and seek employme 
"ced mothers would. preler to 


теу 


find such employment, but they quickly 
for 


discover that salaries 
about one third of the sal 
comparable jobs. W 
baby sitters’ fees 
is zevo. 
Repealing the alimon 
port laws would be an 
right now, for divorced men. 
community as a whole, howev 
solves nothing: the and chil- 
dren would then be thrown on welfare, 
wd they would continue to be an cco- 
nomic drain. liberationists 
claim, and I concur, that the only long 
term solutions are: first, to train girls for 
independence. not for submissive de 
pendency; second, to compel employers 
to pay men and women the same sa 


women 
ies for 
h transporta 
nd lunch, the net g: 


t 


пеп in 


and child-sup- 


Women's 


es 


for the same work. This means not a 
mere change in statute. lw but a real 
revolution in our unwritten laws—ou 


customs, prejudices and traditions. 
Those are the hardest Laws of all to 
repeal 


e 


Marylin Cummings 
North Amherst, Massachusetts 


ABORTION AND THE SINGLE GIRL 
My adopted son was brought into the 
world by an unmarried won 
to decide between destroying th 
within her or bearing it and then giv- 
ing it up: loving that life, she chose the 
later course. Her choice was undoubted- 
ly a dificult one, since abortion seems to 
be the accepted means of mainta 
our Victo f that a single woman 
should not look pregnant. Woe unto the 
gle girl who turns up at the office 
h the signs of impending motherhood 
visible, and who ever heard of maternity 
leave for an unmarried wom 
The bility of abortion does 
make women free—on the contrary, it 
simply means that they can't allow 
themselves 10 appear pregnant 
Mis. G. Johns 
New York, New York 


n beli 


ABORTION IN TEXAS 
Texas abortion laws were ruled un- 
utional by a Federal court im 
е 1970. The judges stated that “the 
fundamental right of single women and 
ried persons to choose whether to 
ме children is protected by the Ninth 
ndment through the Fourteenth 
Amendment of the U. S. Constitution." 
the U. S. Supreme 
Court. In November 1970, individuals and 
rations throughout the state formed 
(continued on page 191) 


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PLAYBOY POTPOURRI 


people, places, objects and events of interest or amusement 


OCTOBRIANA COUNTRY 


Out of the Soviet Union comes Octobriana, 
a comicstrip cult figure started by a 
Progressive Political Pornography 
underground group at Kiev University. 
In the strip, bosomy and bare-buttocked 
Octobriana, whose name captures the 
spirit of the October Revolution, leads 
able snowmen a 

invaders and even blows up the 

Kremlin, Brought to the West by a Czech 
defector, Octobriana's adventures will 

be published this month by Harper & Row. 


GOLDEN NUGGETS 


Understanding that there was more to 19th Century interior desi 
portraits of Queen Victoria and beaded lamp shades, the Golden 
Movement Emporium of Santa Monica has opened its doors to reveal 
what must certainly be one of the most splendiferous collections of 
yesteryear oddities in the West. Brimming over with hundreds of spindle- 
backed chairs, wall sconces, exotic—and crotic—brewery-nude paintings 
and “countless other obsolete esoteric trappings,” the Golden Movement 
also will attempt to locate a particular item upon request. Among its CALLS FOR HELP 
specialists are experts who deal with the antique needs of architects, Y dis Р € 
designers, decorators and restaurateurs. The Colden Movement's finds there's a question on sex that's been 
include a 19th Century apothecary shop complete in every detail and a | bothering you—and you can't wait for an 
German hand-carved African-mahogany front-and-back bar, featuring a Paes кус 
solid-onyx railing 37 fect long. With paneling, the price is $14,500. Rug aA 


Education Service, (212) 867-9044, any 
workday from ten AM. to nine р.м. The 
sex hotline, manned by trained staff 
members and a corps of volunteers, 
fields an average of 200 calls dail 


WHERE THERE'S A WHEEL, THERE'S A WAY 


White Motorcar 


Attention, vintage-car freaks. The second annual Kirk 

юш! to get rolling April 28-29 at Cabrini College in Radnor, 

Serious collectors, of course, will wish to arrive on the 

w check of the more than 200 handsome machines 

mbled from a variety of sources. On the night of the 
arty followed by а mini-auction of automobilia. 

s the following ith such sterling 
5 above. Other exotic 


of Spain; a 1938 Rolls-Royce Phantom Ш by Vanden Plas once 
confiscated by Nazi Joseph Goebbels, and the 1940 Caddy that totes 
Marlon Brando in The Godfather. Do we hear a 


@ GO-GO STICK 


You know the old saying “Build a 
better Pogo stick and. . . .” Well, 
Chance Manufacturing did and now 
Hammacher Schlemmer in New 
York is selling the world's first 
gasoline powered Pogo stick, which 
gets its go from a two-cycle engine. 
"The more-bounce-to-the-cunce Hop 
Rod also needs eight C batteries to 
activate the spark unit, which fires 
only when pressure from your weight 
forces the piston up an internal 
chamber. At $60, the Rod comes 
complete with assembly instructions 
(fuel and batteries not induded). 
Hoppy landings. 


BOOZE WHO 


Japan, site of the 1972 
Winter Olympics, re- 
cently hosted the most 
spirited contest of all, 
the International 
Cocktail Competition, 
with mixmasters from 
23 nations vying for the 
championship. The 
winning concoction 
was: 5 parts bourbon, 
2 sweet vermouth and 
1 each Galliano, dry 
vermouth and Bitter 
Campari. Stir with ice, 
strain, serve with cherry. 


CHECKERBAWD 


In our continuing search for more and better 
divertissement érotique for home, office or 

vered a magnetic Strip 

ng for but $1.49, the folding 
five-inch-square board comes complete from 
Spencer Gifts with case and a set of checkers, 
each marked with a symbol for the garment you 
remove should the picce be taken, Your move. 


BURGUNDIAN BOATEL 


INTO YOUR BAG, 


JUNIOR BIRDMAN 
‘Are you plagued with bulging 
pockets but absolutely refuse 

to carry а “male bag" for 

fear of drawing whistles? Then 
load all your pocket goodies— 
or even a loaf of bread and a 
bottle of wine, if you choose— 
into a vinyl reproduction of a 
World War One flying ace's 
helmet that comes complete 
with an inconspicuous black 
cotton drawstring lining and a 
pair of detachable sun goggles. 
You can land yours for $26 
from a West Coast firm called 
Flyers’ Supplyers. And if no one 
will believe you own a Fokker, 
tell them you're about to 

stoke up your Type 57 Bugatti 
or your Indian 80 or your. .. < 


Huck Finn never had it 
like this. The simple 
pleasures of riding a 

river have been elevated. 
toa state of luxury by 
Auto-Europe, Inc. When 
you sign aboard its M.S. 
Palinurus for a week's 
cruise on Burgundian 
rivers, the excursion 
includes gourmet meals 
and generous servings 

of the regional wines. 
Costs vary, but all include 
rental from Paris to 
Dijon: and when you 
disembark downriver at 
Chalon-sur-Saône, Auto- 
Europe will sce that the 
same rental car awaits you. 


CA 


5 
X 


PLAYBOY 


194 


PLAYBOY FORUM (continue from page 190) 


The Texas Abortion Coal 
ws to protect the bi 
to determine whether or not to 


for 


cont 
abortions 


medical personnel 
ngs, to provide that the pro- 
ble to all women and to 
protect women from either compulsory 
abortion or compulsory childbe: 
Mition's efforts have been di- 
у toward mobilizing public 
opinion, We welcome the participati 
Ш interested persons and or 


round 


cedure is 


The с 
rected pr 


mi 


Sue Anne Lloyd, Houston Coordinator 
is Abortion Coal 
Texas 


The Te: 
Bell 


FAMILY-PLANNING CENTERS 

Despite the con 
10 block abortion reform thy 
optimistic 
alized 


nation, we 
ture of Ше 


“Bul € 


re Carried out by competent ing its first y 


1 ло work 
ic right of 


resent abortion |: 


One of the most 


equate sur- 


cab services a 
provisi 


m of other fer 


bortion 


sion of ; 
family-pl. 


tion of 
ations, 


unwanted. births. It 


way in which abortions cin 


routinely available 


щ cllorts of some hood is ope 


ughout the Bronx. and anothe 


bortion laws in the 


veryone thought I was a truly magnificent human 


being and a sweetheart of a guy!” 


ed States. We say t 
York's refusal to 


ppeal or erode 
w and the success 
fo ensure that with which thar law was implemented dur 


portant steps now 
taken by Planned. Р: 
City is the 


integration of 
orüon information, counseling. medi- 
1 follow-up 

ility services, con- 
taception and sterilization. The provi- 


s part of a full range of 
services | 
vidual 10 be fully informed of all the 
options available for the prevention of 


cally accepted service. Pla 
ing such a center in the 
larger one at 380 
bout the fu Second Avenue, Manhattan, 

Several changes in the s 


us of abor- 


ated legal issues have occurred 
since the publishing of the September 
1971 Playboy Forum report, “The Abor- 
on Backlash.” Fortunately, the 
York Suite supreme court overturned a 
state order disallowing Medicaid reim- 


bursement for abor 
ry and medically 
the bills banning commer abortion- 
referral services that w 1 awaiting 
the governor's signature at the time ol 
PLAYBOYS report have since become law. 
(Some commercial referral services, how- 
eve, continue to operate, and some are 
currently challenging the law in court.) 
The Family Planning Information 

Service, (219) 677-3040. which receives 
over B000 calls a month, is operated 
on bchalf of the New York С Imer 
Agency Council on Family Planning by 
P. P. N. Y. C. Ht makes Iree abortion refer 
rals to all facilities meeting the requi 
ments of ih w York City 
Code. In addition, it gives free informa 
tion, counseli 
mily-pla 
tontrol, abortion, 
and voluntary sterilization 

Alfred F. Moran 

Executive Vice-President 

Planned Parenthood of New York 

City, Inc. 
New York. New York 


isons, Also, 


JAPANESE DATA 

In the September 1971 Playboy Forum 
report, “The Abortion Backlash,” our 
organization was listed as а sa 
list of reputable Japanese obstetric 
who perform abortions, Since then, we 
have received dozens of requests for such 


ce for a 


ns 


information from women in need of 
abortions, most of whom are living 
the Far East on various military install 


tions. For five years, we did publish a 
list of abortion specialists in J 


pan, 


Mexico and Ристо Rico; however, we 
discontinued the list last year, 
because by ihat time most American 


women with the moncy to travel such 
distances were able to obtain. abortions 
within the U.S. Weve been forced 
to answer cach of these recent letters 
ion at least a year old 

We suggest that women seeking 
tions in the Far Fast contact fami 
gencies or local or regi 
Ith departments in Japan. or cor 
individual physici ig in ob 
stetrics and gynecology, Abortion is widely 
able in Japan. 


а spes 


Ann Treseder 
Association то Repel Abortion Laws 
Francisco, Calilornia 


REFERRAL SUCCESS 

Thank you for publishing Mark Hor 
Tings’ letter, which included the phone 
numbers of all Zero Population Growth 


Abortion. Referral Services (The Playboy 
Forum, January) will be grati 
fied to learn that after you listed our 
service for the first time in your Septem- 
her 1971 issue, we received over 700 calls 


from 


You 


persons who siid they found us 


Avnoy. TT 


aders 


throi 


Us great for 


for your v 


and for the cause of 
legalized abortion 
Please keep up the 


Flective 
friend 


od work 
better 
and we are enormously grateful 
Roberta Schneide 
Zera Population Growth 
Abortion Referral Service 
New York. New York 


couldn't have a 


nan 


THE RELIGIOUS ISSUE 
1 would like, first of all, to apolo; 


for having taken so long before sending 
any word to pLavnoy, which has been a 
most qualified and devoted ally in the 
fight for the repeal of abortion laws 

As a spokesman for an organization 
representing several thousand people in 
Illinois who support repeal of restrictive 
abortion laws, 1 would like to reply 10 
Dr. Bart T. Heffernan, who de 
the January Playboy Forum, that the abor- 
tion question is “only a narrow sectarian 
religious issue." After thoroughly exam- 
ining the anti-abortion view for more than 
three years, I find ov 
that the only substantial opposition to 


whelming evidence 


repeal of abortion laws anywhere in this 
county is inspired. organized and fi 
nanced by the hierarchy of the Roman 


Catholic Church. 

My group and I have publicly chal 
lenged Dr nd other mem- 
bem of organizations to 
name any nonreligious medical, scientif 
ic, educational or welfare groups support- 
ing their point of view. We have yet to 
receive am answer. Our position, on the 
other hand, is supported by hundreds of 
nonreligious org 
clud 


юш the 
Col 
lege of Obstetricians and Gynecologists, 
American Public Health Association 
the Federation of American Scientists, the 
Chicago Child Care Society, the Illinois 
Congress of Parents and Teachers and the 
Welfare Council of Metropolitan Chicagi 

The Church spends enor- 
mous amounts of money for advertising 
campaigns in where liberaliza- 
tion of abortion laws is being consid- 


izations thro 
the 


country American 


the 


Catholic 


states 


ered. It publishes pamphlets and runs 
newspaper and magazine ads. It rents 
anti-abortion slides and films that are 


publicized in literature sent to parishes 
all over the country. Legislators, particu- 
larly Catholic ones. ave pressured by the 
Church to vote against liberalizing abor- 
tion laws, and those who do not comply 
frequently condemned the 
pulpit as murderers and punished by 
Chureb-instigated efforts to defeat their 


are from 


bids for re-election. In Maryland, Pat 
rick Cardinal O'Boyle asked. churches 
in five counties to mail a voting chart 


first class, to all parishioners and to рау 
for the mail from parish funds, In Towa 
Catholic parochial school children wrote 
English 
assignment and sent them to legislators 
In New York, 
has launched an enormous publicity effort 
against the elective-abortion law. Trying 
to make it appear as though non-Catholics 
are involved in the anti-abortion fight 
the Church started so-called nonsectarian 
organizations in a number of states: the 
hito-lile groups the birthright 
operations, However, these organizations 
are run by Catholics and. funded mainly 
by the tax-exempt Church, Also in New 
York, last Janu: ting on a suit by 
a Catholic law professor, а judge who is 
a member of the Guild of Catholic Law 
yers of Queens issued a temporary. re- 
straining order to stop all abortions at 
municipal hospitals 

In my home state, Hlinois, the. combi 
nation of Catholics in high places closely 
tied to the Church hierarchy and law 
makers living in Catholic-dominated ares 
has made legal abortion an almost impos 
sible goal. Dr. Heffernan and state's at 
torney Edward Hanrahan. who together 
led the fight to block a Federal-court 
decision legalizing abortion in Illinois 


letters against’ abortion as an 


the wealthy archdiocese 


ri and 


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207. 


195 


PLAYBOY 


196 


both Roman Catholics. So is the po- 
ly powerful majority leader in the 
Ilinois house of representatives, Henry 
Hyde, the most active opponent of abor- 
tion-law reform in that body. Here, too, 
priests were told to read from the pulpit 
an antiabortion message signed by sis 
bishops and sent from the Springfield 
and the Chicago offices of the Hlinois 
Catholic Conference, The result of this 
was that thousands of letters, all with 
the same emotional relerence to “killing 
babies," were sent by parishioners to 
state representatives. 

It must be added, in f 
my Catholics not support the 
archy's stand. In. New York, Catholic 
Women for Abortion Law Repeal | 
an influential role in the саш 
п Hawaii, a Catholic state senator led 
the repeal forces and a Catholic gov 
allowed the bill to become law. According 
to records from various states, the same 
percentage of Catholic women have abor- 
tions as do women from other religi 


ness, that 


roups. 


This letter is not intended to be 
an atack on Catholics or on Roman 
atholicism. However, we do resent the 
active role the Catholic hierarchy has tak 
en in tying to impose its views on 
everyone «һе. And we thoroughly reject 
the «айт that this is not “a 
secta reli issue.” The 
tion to abortionlaw repeal is 
totally motivated. by sect 
ical beliefs. The resulting po 

ng to this demoda 
society founded on the pri 
ration of church and state. 


narrow 
ious 


ian opposi- 


almost 


ап theolog- 


ple of sepa- 


PHOTOGRAPHING THE FETUS 

1 congratulate you on your convincing 
reply to the letter from Dr. Ван T. Нес 
lernan in ihe January Playboy Forum 
He completely misunderstood the reasons 
for my writing the book From Concep- 
lion to Birth: The Drama of Life's Be- 


“A man of my years often yearns for the 
puller of little feet around his apartment, Miss Latimore. 
By the way, what size shoe do you wear?” 


ginnings (Rugh and  Shettles, Harper 
Ж Row, 1971), but you interpreted them 
correctly. И was my айп to educate th 
already pregnant. woman as to what was 
happening day by day so as 10 instill 
in her a degree of awe and apprec 
tion of her condition. 1 felt that know! 
edge, aided by natuval-color pictures, 
might change the attitude of some wom- 
cn from fear and anxiety to excitement 
and anticipation so that their children 
would be happily welcomed into this 
world. A newborn child. сап sense, lo 
before he сап express himself. whether 
he is w The absence of 
this love Г most of our soci: 
problems today 

Dr. Heffernan suggests that you publish 
some of our color pictures. presumably to 
convince people that abortion is out- 
right murder of a person. I you exam. 
ine a photograph of а two-month-old 
human fetus. you will see thar it could 
be described аз ‚ chicken or 
even a ttle, and no layman would 


ted and loved. 


the crus 


have enough experience to deny the 
assertion. To say that this organism is а 
human being and therefore то conclude 


that abortion der is ridiculous. 
Since the law in New York has been 
changed. around 200,000 abortions have 
that state, about hall 
is. It is bener, to 


been performed i 
of them for һоп 
my way of thinking, that these 200,000 
fetuses were denied. birth into a hostile 
environment, Whether it is the sperm or 
the avum that is denied survival by not 
reaching the state of conception, or 
whether it is an embryo or ferus that is 
denied smvival by abortion, the diller- 
ence is only one of timing, 1 
created. by conception. though it c 
perpetuated by the union of a living 
sperm and ovum. Each sperm or ovum 
that goes unused is allowed to die, and 
we Gill this contraception. If some indis- 
action or lack of technical. knowledge 
or facilities leads to a pregnancy, why 
the mother and child 


le is not 


п be 


should both be 
punished? 
Children should be wanted, planned 
for and cared for rather than tolerated as 
а lilelong punishment for technological 
mi т. My book is for a better 
beginning for all children, and its pic 
tures and thesis should not be interpreted 
to support amtiabortion propagandists. 
Dr. Roberts Rus 
Professor of Radiology (Ее) 
College of Physicians & Surgeons 
Columbia University 

New York, New York 


The Playboy Forum” offers the 
opportunity for an. extended dialog be- 
tween readers and editors of this pub- 
lication on subjects and issues related to 
“The Playboy Philosophy.” Address all 
correspondence to The Playboy Forum, 
Playboy Building, 919 North Michi- 
gan Avenue, Chicago, Ilinois 60611. 


WONDERFUL FOLKS 


ventures with Japanese companies com- 
1 more time talking 
with bankers than they do with company 
officials. 

What makes that debtto-equity т 
possible—in fact, what makes the entire 
Japanese industrial effort. successlul—is 
the extraordi ighly elective. but 
often outrageous collaboration. between 
government and business. So close are 
their ties that the businessgovernment 
semp is regarded a corporation, 
which foreigners have dubbed Japan, Inc. 

Japan, Ine, operates as if it were 
a giant multidivisional company. The 
government is corporate headquarters. 
where all planning. long-term policy 
and investment decisions are made. The 
ions—such as Mitsubishi, 
паке operating 
isions, free to make their own dedi 
sions, compete with one another and 
direct operations, but only within the 
framework set down by corporate head- 
quarters. 

“Government and business are differ- 
ent sides of the same coin," explains 
Robert J. Ballon, a. Belgian Jesuit who 
heads the finance department at Sophia 
1 Tokyo. "In the West, gov- 
ernment and business are usually at 


cach other's throats,” he says. "In Ja 
business looks upon gove 
dose 


relative.” The difference, appar- 
Western. society 
Japanese society 
built on harmony and compromise. 
However you look at it or whatever 
you call it, it works. No Japanese сот 
ny enters into a joint venture with a for- 
cign firm without close guidance from the 
Ministry of c, the Ministry of In- 
ional Trade and Investment (MITI) 
en 


tern: 
or the responsible government а 

In a typical show of unity between 
government and business the top brass 
of all the country utomobile firms 
gathered at a mountain resort near To- 
Куо a few years ago to draw up a joint 
statement of support for the gove 
ment’s policy against ng restrictions 
on foreign investment in the domestic 
automobile industry. They also pledged 
to cooperate with one another wh 
posible to avoid any assistance from 
foreign firms. Just imagine the Justice 
Department's reaction if Detroits big 
three were to meet at an Iron Mount 
ski lodge to discuss industry proble 
and Government policy. 

In some ways, Japan, Inc, leaves the 
govern to charges of corruptio 
It is impl by 
approach to 


ney 


wine and dine the 
bout enough pres- 


the 


(continued [rom page 162) 


enough money, vou cum get away with 
anything there.” 

Not surprisingly, business contributes 
heavily to politics, amd politicians, in 
turn, attempt to sustain a booming cco- 
nomic environ ess can 
profit. Government officials retire and go 


influence and contacts to get special treat- 
ment. Japan's securities industry 
several ex-finance. ministry officials, and 
many former MITT officials turn up in 
the hierarchy of trade organizations, 

So close is the bond betwee 
ment and business that. Premie 


govem- 
Fisaku 
Sato himself commands the total Japa- 
ive: he heads the Su- 
preme Trade Council, a group of top 
business and government leader 
quietly slices up the world market and 
seis annual goals for every major product 
and country. Once these goals have been 
set, companies launch an attack on foreign 
markets with the precision of a well-oiled 
military machine. First, strategy is 
and a baule plan drawn up; the 
connaissance p 
four or five men, to scout the terr 
probe for weaknesses in the enemy's de- 
fenses; finally. the main assault” is 
launched. to close the deal and start up 


nese export. offer 


the business. J executives leav 
ing for foreign countries аге seen off at 
Tokyo International Airy h all the 
ceremony accorded a depaning govern 
ment delegation. Newspapers recond their 
“heroics” with bold, black headlines— 
but reserve words such as invade and 
attack to describe moves into Japan by 
foreign compan 

At Toyota City, auto workers are prod- 
ded to work harder with posters and 


nese 


maps placed along the assembly lines 
showing the latest tally of Toyota car 
sales around. the world. Mitsui trading 
company workers in overseas offices have 
been known to sleep by telex machines. 


waiting for important instructions from 
their head office or for confirmation of 


а deal just conduded im some remote 
part of the globe. One Japanese mining- 
company representative received accolades 
from his colleagues when he escaped from 
an African nation in the midst of a c 
war with maps of important mineral 
discoveries stitched into his underwear 
Perhaps the best demonstration of this 
mercantilisic Messianism is the song 
sung each day by Matsushita workers: 


For the building of a new Japan 
Let's put our strength and mind. 
together 


“We'd like to oblige you, but we have a prior 
commitment Lo another highjacker." 


197 


PLAYBOY 


Doing our best to promote produc- 
tion, 

Sending our goods to the people of 
the world, 

Endlessly and continuously, 

Like water gushing from a fountain. 


Other companies have gone to even 
more extreme lengths to prod their em- 
ріоуее into action. To infuse its manag- 
ers with the selling spirit, Toshiba used 
to send them to a secluded mountain- 
top resort, where they were put through 
round-the-clock рер sessions, shouting 
morale-boosting slogans such as "Sell!" or, 
for the more ambitious types. "I will be 
until they were near exhaus 
a finally had to drop the 


scheme in the wake of public criticism. 
Such heavy prodding reflects one very 
simple fact: Left to themselves. the 


nese really don't work very hard, 
is probably one of the first paradoxes 


about this amazing country that 


cigner runs into during a visit to 
The average worker produces only 
about half as much as a West German 


n American. 
any big Japanese office build 
«| you'll often come away with 
Jing that the hust 
shirted olfice workers is engaged in busy 
work—but not work that seems particu- 
larly productive or necessary, just some 
thing t keep everybody occupied. People 
will spend hours in tiny conference rooms, 
sipping tea and talking with visitors or 
friends. Staff. meetings will go on inter- 
minably, with е debating, апа 
Ivzing and discuss nessential points. 

Many foreign businessmen complain 
about the robotlike mentality of the Japa- 
nese work 1 his reluctance 10 take 
the ti: One Americain manager 


and one fourth as much as 


\ 


p: 


the 
g horde of white 


ve. 
was perturbed to discover that an 


countant had spent two days checki 
vechecking a set of incomplete figures 
"He knew they were incomplete and 
that he would never get the right answer 
until they were complete.” said the exas- 
, "but he didn't think it 
lorma- 


n.” Others find otfice workers moody 
md cnatic in their work patterns. Chie 
kane, a professor of Asian studies 


at Tokyo University, observ 
U. S.. workers seem to mai 
mum level of efficiency re; 
they may feel. But the Japanese worker, 
if he's in a comfortable mood, wi 
hard: if he is feeling blue, he won 
Because of this apparent fact of 
ipanese life, companies reward their em- 
ployees with jobs for life and opport 
ties for title or position in return for 
d work. Such rewards are very impor. 


the 


и to the statusconscious Japanese. So 
i Iditional range of fringe 


few socialist countries could. 
ese executives have a con- 


cerned but not patronizing way of talk- 
ing about their employees, as if they 
were their children. "The government 
does not provide enough social benefits, 
explains Takeshi Marsushita's per- 
sonnel d - Matsushita's duty 
to take care of his employees. his respon. 
sibility to bring them up and train them." 
Matsushita does just that—and. pro- 
tc in womb-otomb bene 
s can have iheir childr 
il. get mi 
а Matsushita chapel, live in 
Matsushita housing or buy a home of 
their own with a Matsushita loan, 7 


company pays employ 
penses, subsidizes пи 

caps and uniforms and, kiter on, will 
even provide free flowers, candlestands 


and other equipment for their funerals. 
All this, plus the twice-yearly bonuses 
that other Japanese firms hand out. 
Matsushita even throws in а little 
more. Recognizing that workers аге oc- 
casionally down in the dumps. due to 
domestic problems or job pressures, 
the company maintains what it calls "the 
room of self-control,” stuck away in 
the corner of its dry«elbbatery plant 
Osaka, where employees cin let off 
steam. Leading to the room is а maze 
ilt a iwe like the old Fun House at 
Coney Island, White footsteps are paint- 
ed on the floor to guide the visitor 
through its labyrinthine corridors. which 
are decked out with large distorting mir- 
rors on the walls. 
“The idea is to m 
that his problem mi 


ke the worker see 
ht simply be one 


of perspective.” explains a Matsushita 
guide. “It makes him feel like he is 
seeing himself through another's eyes.” 


At the end of the maze is the 100m, 
equipped with a punching bag, a bicycle 
exerciser and other gym equipment. plus 
two m canvas 
h m ill-disposed worker 
h with a short wooden 
— FULL SWING, а 
sign over the dummies encourages. Em- 
ployees break about oue club a week 
у their frustrations, "If 
doesn't help.” says the guide, "they 
сап see the company doctor.” 
In return for this cornucop 
fits hom their corporate fathers, 
panese employees work 1 
nd a half days a week and seldom take a 
i n though they're entitled to 

ual two-week holiday with pay. 
y-based family 
ins why there are few se 
strikes in Japan. Labor unions ate or- 
anized vertically, by enterprise, rather 
than horizontally, by wade, as in the 
West. Thus, as members of a "compa- 
y union,” workers realize that neither 
they nor their employers will benefit 
from a prolonged walkout. As a result, 
when the end of the business year pops 
up and it’s time to demand a wage hike, 


ати a 


ng hours 


employees will often “strike” during 
lunch hours. after work or on holidays. 

really serious strike may last а few 
hours. 


s in Japan lı 
been so lucky, mainly for political reasons. 
Jersey. Standard's refinery was h 
by а ten-day walkout in 1969, the first 
major strike foreign company, 


sso 


d U.S. banks are frequently harassed 
v Gaijinzó, а Communist-domin: 
clerical union that has dr: every- 

to ne 


meriam Express 
nese telephone 


receptionist because she couldn't speak 
English. well 
her case i 
charge or 
and h 


nough, Gaijn-ró turned 
to a cause célebre, 
two of Y. 
been harassing the beleaguered 
ny off and оп ever since, despite 


act that the w n question was 
sehired lor o. Fortunately, only a 
few Amex employees are members of 


Gaijin-v6, so the bank continues to func- 


hand spe 
Tokyo office. ch gans. sing a song 
or two and then pack up. "les 
a circus around here,” comments 
annoyed Amex employee. Amex’ office 
looks as if it were permanently decorated 
for the Japanese New Year: bright. Gai- 
jin-ró posters hang from the counters 
and walls, side by side with white Amex 


one 


plac bank's side of 
the dispute. 
From ns present 


а minor threat to Japanese businesses, 
but a much more far-reaching concern 
of Japanese industrialists is the growing 
labor shortage. A recent estimate of un- 
filled job openings was 670.000, and the 
ach isn’t likely to ease much in the 
їс future. Yet while the m 
moth business combines, or айати (the 
Mitsuis, Mitsubishis and mitomos), are 
suffe at, it's the Watanabes 
and Ishikawas (the Smiths and Joneses) 


б 


who are being hardest hit. Caught in the 
squecze between Japan's rising labor 
shortage and its rising wage rate, the 


small service businesses in- 
duxrics serving the gi 
forced to cut service, merge with one an- 
other or simply go bankrupt 
The shortage is in both unskilled and 
, nd competition for both 
gly intense. М one end of 
e factory worker is starting to 
jobhop more than he ever used to and 
most industries аге noticing a slow but 
ly increase in labor turnover. Wom: 
en are being actively wooed to help fill 
the gaps created by the shortage, with 
some firms establishing 
" at factories in rural arcas 
husband sccki 
At the 


other end of the scale, the 


“Heavens! I's just like Westchester County on a Saturday night!” 


199 


about what һе 
whom he works for, 


and becoming dioosier 


s considered 


"But today w 
dilliculties hiring girl clerks. 
they don't want 10 work overt 
university grad 
like the ide 
solicit. deposits. 
tively seek 


Fuji Bank Lid. 


PLAYBOY 


ates, because they don't 
of having 10 go out and 


"s on special holida 
nd times of illness, The 
send our young solicitors who hav 
scramble and fight 
10 my to get a deposit. Sometimes they 

ars in hopes 


even mana 
of swaying a prospective c 
As a result of the labor problem. the 


competition amor 
is becoming fierce 


у. something of a 
mose business, shoc 
go when it 
ual ads ш 


ted. running an 
other compat 
and go to work for ir. Akio Мой 
under, estin 


100 new workers 


chi year from. compa 
employment 


ies where lifetime 
md a promorion-based-on- 
seniority policy stille young hopes for 

. “We simply ask a 
п 10 show us what he can do 


quick advance 


» is one of 
I executives, 


Morita, who at thi 


"s youngest chi 


» older, more 


Other companies turn 
al ways to cope with ıl 
tudes of vouth 


Мапу business- 


consider the permissiveness of high 
school and university teachers toward 
students and they condemn the much- 
touted coming age of freethinking and 
adividuality as nothing less than hereti 
ıl. unhealthy and definitely unprod 
tive, And some will go to rather bizar 
ths to root ont these evils. 
Таке Canon, Lic. the camera maker, 
which has devised an exhausting 30-hour 
"concentration. course” for new recruits 
i а hammer and а chisel and 
a piece of iron hour alter 
‚ keeping time to the shrill whistle 
ructor. Since they don't always 
e chisel, their hands are usually 
battered, bruised and. bloodied by the 
end of a sesion. The idea, a Canon 
spokesman says. is to instill “spivitua 


backbone" into the new recruits. “It is 
during the chiselavork period ihan their 

Ise sense of ‘freedom’ lat schools 
is stamped out.” remarks Y. Ueda, Can- 


on's chisel-faced chief instructor. "Un 
tamed creatures in the beginning, they 
Y t0 han. 


suddenly become docile and 
dle alter the hard practice.” 


О 


" 
а looksee at this 
iy officials were 
surprised when a group of visiting French 
wly fainted from the cacophony 
inst iron and the sight of 
ged hands. “Canon instructors sim 
ply do uot take the hand bruises seri- 
ously.” a company PR release reassures, 
“Since they know through their experi 
ence tha brief 


bruises disappear айе 


iodine treatment." 
With or without iodine, most foreign 
companies based in Japan don't go i 


Trees 


“All right, son. go and see this Mr. Barnum, 
but what's so special about you? 


ssions nor, for that 
matter, many other Japanese rituals, "A 
Jot of foreign companies come here and 
immediately start tossing out a lot of the 
rituals and ceremonies practiced by Ja] 
nese companies without realizing that 
the Jay ter than they give 
them credit observes 
Hegg. senior m 
тото ҰМ, а joint. ventur 
nese 


for such taining s 


nese are sn 
Toy." orge L 
aging director of Sumi- 
of the Jap 
d the American companies of the 


same names, Foreign firms will elimi- 
nate as unnecessary, for example, the five 
minutes of exercise that Japanese busi- 
nesses often hold. before the start ol a 
working day—without reali 
is, in effect, a devious way of 
employees to work five minutes е 

Other American companies 
the customary Japanese retirement age 
of 55 to the American-style tenure of 65 


“They usually regret it later on.” Hegg 
explains "You accumulate a lor of 
executive deadwood under a lifetime 
employment system. So this only prolongs 
the agony another ten years lor the 
American managers. ‘The Japanese em- 
ployee loves it because it gives him 
another ten years of salary he wouldirt 
have had with the Japanese employer.” 
As for capable м most 
Japanese companies will put them on a 
yearto-year conmact alier retirement. at 
lower than they had 
And mo fringe 


nor executives, 


aries usually 
been making, 
either, 
The Japanese habit of making impor 
tant decisions by group consensus rather 
than executive fiat also taxes the patience 
of Wester businessmen, A proposal 
moves slowly through die. burcauc 
layers of Japanese firms, wi 
department chief or section. he 
ting his stamp of approx 


enefits. 


fast and with all the collective strength 
they can muster. 

en more perplexing is the accen 
tumed sense of place or rank Japanese 
executives. exhibit ig wih 
foreign firms. Seating ments are 
precise 


n nego 


1 man 
ing his foreign: counter 
There course, amusing 
ghis. talks 
ryder and Heavy 
ries regarding a joint v the head 
of the Chrysler team entered the confer- 
ence Late and took а chair across from 
the Mitsubishi chief negotiator but one 
1 to the Japanese’s right. One by on 
three other members of the Mitsu 
bishi team seated next to their ma 


ше, of 
Dur 


side 
betwee 


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left the conference room on 
texts and returned, each m 
one seat until a vacant cha 
Chrysler executive. A brief 
nd when the 
resumed talks, the Mitsubi 
had taken the seat directly 
the Chrysler official. 


arious pre- 
ving down 
т faced the 
ca break" 
two teams 
negotiator 
ross from 


was called 


lent. oc- 
па Japa- 


agement by the Nippouese 
ast-ditch effort to keep the 
ter [rom going to court, the two 
firms agreed to meet on neutral ground. 
on the second floor of a vacant office 
ion negotiations over 
wouldn't attend the 
. “И was 
the North and South Viet- 
shape of the 
American схеси- 
ese objected t the 


and 


would 
ceting were hot and stick 


who 


ише like 
mese arg 


tive recalls, The Japa 
presence of 
псу bu 
n adjoi 


à Amerie: 
he could s 
h his car to the 
door so he could hear the conversati 

Another American stood in 
lot next to the build 
signal 10 go into the building in the 
event the Japanese side decided to call 
in its own reinforcements. It was all 


very ridiculous, but it did save the mat- 
ter from goin 


I of Japan,” boasts 
the Hotel New 
Orani's revolving cocktail lounge. Perched 
400 feet above the ground like а giant 
uminum bird's nesl, the 
lounge makes a 360-degree sweep of 
Tokyo's skyline about every hour. But 
most days a heavy doud of photochemi- 
cal smog hangs low over the city, slicin 
the 1089-foot Tokyo "Tower ist. 
“This country is literally choking on. 
its G. N. PL," a young economist with the 
Japan Economie Research Center tells 
me over a Scotch and water. “We may 
have the world’s third-largest economy, 
bur we rank thirteenth in per-capita in- 
come, у 
be done at home, he 
Japan reaches the мап у 
Westerners are predicting, More G. М.Р. 
will have to go for social benefits, hou: 
pollution abatement and other me: 
10 raise living standards. "Japan may be 
the biggest in terms of С. Х.Р. by the 
year 2000. but the next century might 
belong to someone else.” 
If pollution is dstick, the prob- 
lems facing Japan in the years ahead 
immense, By all counts, it i 
polluted (ion in the world. 


"А great deal must 
believes, before 


"Honest—I have no ulterior motive. 
Fm just interested in your body.” 


"Garbage and the gross nation 
uct of a country are closely related," 
survey by the Tokyo Metropolitan 
me observers 
that, in Japan, G, N. P. stands 
tional pollution. 

toss a coin to establish 
actly which city is the most polluted 
Japan. Delegates at an ional con. 
ference on pollution in Tokyo in 1970 
were so uncharitable as to designate Fuji 
City 
world.” 


emment stated recently. 


eve 


ex 


internal 


ritable, that is, hec 


Und 
few people have ever heard of the t 


town located at the foot of Mt. Fu 
и Fuji City was delighted, It put. the 
on the map. 

Tokyo would probably get most people's 
vote, Smog is increasingly a problem, 


ci 


mainly because factories in the arc 
burn heavy oil from the Persian Gulf, 
which has а high sulphur content. The 


result js that on most days. the air is 
thick with the smell of burnt oil. Add 
the exhaust 5 of some 1,500,000 cars 
and you get an idea of the air-pollution 
problem. In fact, it's so bad that traffic 
policemen are required to return fre- 
quently 10 headquarte 
halation. For 25 cents, a truly “gassed 
individual can get а quick breath. of 
unpolluted air from oxygen ve 


ding m 


chines foun nd stor 
Ekewhere, irs not much better. On 
most days, Kawasaki, the big indust 


center а half hour's drive from Tokyo, 
is barely visible through the perpetual 
cloud of soot, smoke and gases u 
surrounds it. Another small Japanese 
resort town had to dose its tuberculosis 
Clinic because of worsening air pollu- 
tion, In Kyoto, Japan's ancient. capital 
city, hydrogen sulphide and sulphur 
dioxide from nearby plants damaged the 
917-year-old bell of Byodo-in "Temple so 
badly that it had to be removed and put 
in sorage. Tourists visiting the Kyoto 
ional Museum are shocked to see an 


Thinker covered with verdigris—greenish- 
blue streaks caused by the exhaust of 
vehicles using a nearby highway. And 
more than a half dozen people have died 


du 


1 own. 


the real 


" 

But 
served for Japan's water. most 
gerously polluted with 
deadly chemicals such as cadmium and 
organic mercury, and very few of Japan's 
major rivers are still clean. enough for 
fish to survive. In Toyama Prefecture, 
some 130 people have been killed by 
cadmium poisoning caused by a nearby 
smelter. Local oficials in Akita Prefecture 
were shocked to find traces of arsenic in 
38 of us hot spas. Prob- 
ably the most notorious incident occurred 


horror stor are ac 


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10 years ago at Minamata Bay, where 
thousands of residents ate fish contami- 
cd by methyl mercury dumped into 
the bay by Chisso Corporation, a chemical 
company. Japanese newspapers recently 
arried а picture of a 24-year-old woman 
who looked no bigger than a five-year 
old. She had been bedridden for the past 
19 years and is unable to speak, hear or 
see—a victim of Minamata Bay. 

The Sato government responded. by 
setting up a cabinetlevel | pollutioi 
control agency last July, pushing tougher 
amipollution laws through the dict, in 
cluding the power to arrest offenders as 


criminals. But Premier Sato has yet to 
demonstrate enthusiasm for enforcement 
Also, with big business still feeling the 


elfects of the country's economic. reces- 
sion, the government isn't expected to 
press companies too hard for heavy ant 
pollution outlays this y 

Perhaps as а sign of ch 
the traditionally passive Japanese citi 
zenry isn't waiting to sce what the роу- 
ernment will do. It has taken matters into 
its own hands, through demonstrations 
and picketing at offending companies, 
lawsuits and Ralph Nader. America's 
consumer cr in Japan last 
nd spent k touring th 
country for a close-up look at the pollu 
tion. His aim was to get publicity. fill 
Japanese newspapers with his analyses 
эЧ suggestions. But he made two mis 
takes. First, he went as а guest of The 
Daily Yomiuri, Japan's second-largest 
newspaper. Japanese newspapermen, be- 


ng 


"I don't care how you do il, 
out something good about pollution!” 


а sensitive and competitive lot, re 
fused to cover press conferences staged 
by a rival paper. His second mistake was 
expecting t0 talk extensively with anyone 
п industry or government about the prob- 
lem. Toyota aud Nissan were afraid to 
meet with him and refused interviews. 
The closest Nader got to Premier Sato was 
the entrance of the Foreign Ministry, 
where he dropped off a letter outlining 
his thoughts on Japan's pollution problem. 
Nonetheless, Nader's visit couldn't 
have been more timely, Picketing and 
bad publicity were forcing several big 
ies to relocate their planis away 
as or to delay planned 
pollution activists were 
ing up shares of the offending com- 
panies’ stock—in the fashion of Nader's 
Raiders vs. G. Mand challenging cor- 
porate plans and policies. Housewives, 
angry at the dual-pricing policies of clec- 
tronics firms that resulted in color-televi- 
sion sets’ being sold at home for S100 to 
3150 more than those exported to the 
launched a nationwide boycott 


sl 


nies finally cut their prices by 15 to 20 
percent to case an inventory swollen to 
geable 1, at the 
of the boycott 

Although | consumer 
cased somewhat lately, it left йз mark 
оп the balance sheets of many сотра- 
nies: The profits of the big color-TV 
makers plunged by 30 to 40 percent last 
year. Perhaps even worse from the 
point of view, the boycott. accelerated 


an unm 


hei; 


resistance has 


Rogers, just go out and. find 


consumer consciousness in Japan. As a 
result, five powerful consumer associa 
tions, mostly comprised of housewives 
on the march for better and cheaper 
merchandise, have sprung into existence 
in a sort of Jateflowering, kimono-clad 
women’s lib. 

But it's the military that’s proi 


pan these days, p 
of the shifting defense posture of the 
U.S. in Asia and recent lopments 
concerning mainland China. Few for 
cigners seem to believe that militarism is 
on the upswing. or that Japan repre 
sents a future threat to the West. The 
global nuclear stalemate and the simple 
lack of new colonics to conquer seem to 
preclude that. Yet Japan is rearming 
and defense is becoming big business. 
The nation’s self-defense forces now to 
wal ound 250,000 men with 15! 
craft, 800 tanks, 4500 artillery pieces and 
around 590 small warships—a far 
from prewar days, but nearly four times 
as great as when it was formed in 1 
This year, Japan may spend more dian 
one percent of its С. №. Р. оп defense, 
seventh in the world in military expendi- 
tures. And Japan's Defense Agency is urg- 
ing a fiveyear build-up plan that would 
cost 14.43 billion dollars, more than twice 
as much as the current. five-year armament 
plan. Under this plan, Japan would add 
490 tanks. 270 armored personnel car- 
helicopters 10 its 
ground-delense force. Among other addi- 
tions would be 56 vessels, including 19 
destroyers, and 158 U.Sstyle F-4 Ph 
tom jets. The agency also plans this 
year to step up— perhaps even double— 
its weaponry purchases Irom the U.S. 
(9500,000,000 last year), mostly due to 
pressure from ihe Nixon. Adminísuation 
on Japan to shoulder a greater sl 
the delense burden. 

While defense 
that Japan will continue to rely on the 
U.S. to deter allout wars, induc 
nuclear war, they that Japan 
needs to modernize its weapons aud 
build up its sea forces to maintain secu- 
rity for trafic in the seas around 
This need for a stronger sel detense 
posture, in the eyes of many Japanese, 
has been heightened by the gradual 
U. S. mili wal Trom Southeast 
Asa and 1 ihat Washington 
will remove combat forces 
than 12.000 men— from Japan later this 
year. Moreover, the possibility of a dé 
between the United and 


de 


ay 


rs and 930 comba 


те of 


olhcials say 


Japanese 


о ng 


argue 


moi 


tente 
Red 


tates 


with the ань 
nese tone of the Nixon Administra. 
tion's economic policies, has iner 
the feeling of isolation 
panese, Naomi Nishimura, head of the 
Defense Agency, raised more than a few 


. combined. 


ased 


mong many 


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PLAYBOY 


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cyebrows last October when he suggest- 
ed a change in Japan's defense policies 
fo permit unarmed Japanese soldiers to 
go on rescuc-and-relie missions in Asia 

A survey conducted by the prime min- 
istes office in 
out of five Japs 
try to be able to delend itself without 
relying on a foreign. power, especially 
the U. S. Faced with a narrowing domes 


1968 revealed that four 


ese wanted their coun- 


tic marker due to declining population 
growth and increasing restrictions in key 
export markets, such as the U. S, busi- 


nesmen are looking to the growing de- 
lense industry as a profitable new outlet 
for their corporate energies. Ninety pe 
cent of the selFilefense forces? 
hardware is sta IN JAPAN. 

Defense for 15 of Js 


ped van 


contracts 


largest industrial enterprises already top 
two. billion ıs. а бише small 
comparison that of the United 


Stines or Rusia, but one thar will in- 
crease sharply in the next five years. 
More importantly, the defense contracts 
provide companies with a cushion du 
g stow business periods such as Japan 
is curently experiencing. Indeed, some 
economists argue that without the ex 
g level of defense expenditures, Japan 
would in 
"The defense indus 


economic straits. 
will play a great- 
i the brake on 
observes опе Tokyo econo- 
Just as the shipbuilding industry 
weathered the recession after the Korean 
War by building ships for the self- 
defense force, other industries will be able 
to ride out пише business slumps by 
supplying equipment and materials to 
an expanded defense force." Some 
dustrialists have called for a tripling 
of the country's self-defense forces and 
а few years one even urged that 
defense expenditures be boosted to а 
ing four percent of the G. N. P. 

people everywhere, the 
nese seem turned off entirely 
by the military. But they are а genera- 
y from making the decisions 
that will determine which way Jap 
goes. By then it will be a moot point. 
Then, too, there is the strongly renewed 
sense of economic nationalism 
country. Five years ago, a Jap 
n would sek the 
counsel of his American р: 
not today. They have listened, learned 
and now are making their own deci- 
s. It seems natural, but. . . . 

Deep down inside, we believe we are 
the supe ys Hideaki Kase, 
young Japanese author writing a book 
about Japan’s determination to be ichi- 
ban (number опе) in the world. “It is 
part of our historical and cultural trad 
on. Japan is the world’s only great 
insular power. We have been cut off 


be seriou: 


er rol fu 


we as а 


recession. 
mist. 


in- 


n the 


nes 
dvice and 
ner, but 


ssman 


from other civilizations for centuries 
and by choice. Like the Jews, we think 
we are the chosen people.” 

He told me that a Japanese magazine 
recently polled 100 of the nation's lead- 
ing business executives and asked ther 
to name the world’s leading race ol 
people, About 40 percent of them picked 
the Nipponese as ichiban and the Се 
m the second best. 
want to be muster achievers,” 
added. "We are driven. by the 
natori spirit, an obsession with gaining 
name or title. Japan wants to be nun 
Der one because being number 
the nant thing. 
your coaches said, "Winning 
y. It’s the only thing.’ It 
me here. There is mo second 


onc is 


ом. Like onc of 


foot 
isn’t everyth 
is th 
place." 

At the airport, there is just time for 
me to pick up a few souvenirs and some 
erial, The Japanese English- 
newspapers lel with 
bout President. Nixon's planned 
visit to Red China. That announcement 
last July probably caused Premier Sato 
more anguish than all of. Nixon's new 
economic policies. In elfect, the dim 
tive premier ght backing a losing 


horse. For years, Japan had faithfully 
followed the United States’ policy of 
generally ignoring mainland C 


it suddenly faced the possibility of b 
left at the starting gate. Sato not only 
failed to anticipate the new U. S-China 
policy but didn't even have a new policy 
of his own with which to follow up the 
American lead. 

At stake, of course, pan's eco- 
nomic and political future Asia. 
There is little love lost between Japan 
and China. The Chinese still have fresh 
memories of Japan's brutal and bum- 
g occupation during World W: 
‘Two, not to mei 
totaling some $50.000,000. While China 
as frequently condemned what it secs 
al of Japanese militarism, what 
oning eco- 
ce through- 
A rapprochement with 
the United States could, Peking might 
well reason, cause further friction be- 
tween Tokyo and Washington and there- 
by isolate Japan. 

True to their mercantilistic instincts, 
however, the Japanese sce mainland 


nomic and political influe 
out the world. 


China the business market of the 
future and want to be first in line when 
the Chinese finally open their door 


Sino-Japanese trade is running around 
one billion dollars annually and is ex- 
pected to grow fourfold in the next 
decide or so. Some 1900 Јар 
men attended Chinas Canton Т 

ir last October—the biggest contin- 
gent from any one country—and an 
even larger number is expected to go to 


Canton for this year's fair, where € 


tansacts about half of its foreign trade. 
Peki 1 
ditions lor 


to do busi 


s laid down some tough con- 
s wishing 
The Chinese want 
the Japanese to promise not to invest in 
South Korea or Taiwan, not to furnish 
tedinical assistance to either of these 
countries, not to supply arms or other 
ssistance to South Vietnam or Cambodia 
nd not to affiliate themselves with a 
U.S. company. Despite these prohibitions, 
many big Japanese manufacturers and 
wading to pay the 
price for wading with mainland. С 
Nippon Steel, the world’s largest steel pro- 
ducer, decided List fall to accept the 
Peki эмей conditions and is now 
working on trade deals with the Chinese. 
And the Sato government may give per 
mission to the Japan Expo 
to finance the export of industrial pl 
to China—herciofore. barred by an old 
agreement v 

“JAPANESE TO 
Tes; one newsy 


Japanese comp: 
ess with it. 


companies are willi 


SEEK CLOSER CHINESE 
per headline blurts out 
in bold, black type. "ЈАМАМА RAP- 
rkocin Met,” blares another. А week-old 
copy of The New York Times announces, 
Nist CAINS 


“yan 
For 

frighte 

China 


EXPECT CHINA 


TRADE 


cooperate rather 
with cach other? Wh 

ications for the 
¢ concord? In 
super-plus 


than compete 
would be the 
of a Sino 


West 


m arket and raw 
the world; the other a tiny 
wd nation with the kinctic energy. 


technical talent 
put it all tog 
Prosperity $ 
ties of such 
to keep 


nd winning spirit to 
А China-Japan Co- 
с infinite posibili- 
liance are enough 
Iuturologist Herman Kahi 
head Tor months. 

n Flight 800 for New 
York now boarding a 

a tiny, doll тЇз voice ani 


accented English over the 
P. А. system. 
As I start to leave, something at the 


newsstand catches my eye. It’s a map. A 
Japanese map of the world, or a map 
of the world as the Japanese see i 
Dead center, looming а litle larger tha 
scale, is the Insular Island. On the left 


is Europe, and on the right, on the 
other side of the Pacific, is the U.S 
For a brief instant, there slight 


otic stirring in my blood. When I 
the world maps always 
s the center of the 
world. But those maps were made in the 
United States. Maybe Rand McNally 
was wrong afte 


рә 
was in school, 
showed Ai 


207 


PLAYBOY 


208 


Nol (continued from page 110) 


that sort of thing—spaghetti іп а bucket, 
chicken in a basket, pig in a blanket. 
She's not really an cater; she's а con- 
ner freak.) But I managed to eat all of 
the Jess & Jim's Kansas City Strip Sirloin 
—all 15 or 20 pounds of it, by my 
estimation 
One aspect of Jess & Jim's decor had 
puzzled me until that even 
room, the tables along the w: 
rated by partition 
that can be closed to m: them com- 
pletely private. Jess & Jim's is, after all, 
a family restaurant; it has a kiddies 
menu. It's not the kind of place people 
go to do a little nuzzling over a plate of 
cottage fries. Glancing across the table 
that night and noticing my l4-ycarold 
nephew cating, 1 
the reason for the curt 
led by the management 
to provide privacy for people 
disgraceful acts of gluttony. 


It has long been acknowledged that 
the single best restaurant in the world is 
Arthur. Bryan at 18th and 
Brooklyn in Kansas City—known to 
practically everybody in town as Charlie 
Bryant's, after Avthur’s brother, who left 


the business in 1946. The day after my 
stupendous steak at Jess & Jim's, 1 went 
nts with Marvin Rich, an cater I 
know in Kansas City who practices law 
оп the side. Marvin eats а lot of every- 
thing—on the way to Bryant's, for in- 
he brought me up to date on the 
ion with great precision 
s thought of him as a 
tempts his 
own barbecue at home—dispatching. his 
wife to buy hickory logs, picking out 
his own meat and covering up any mis 
takes with Arthur Bryant's barbecue 
sauce, which he keeps in a huge jug in 
his garage in defiance of the local 
fire laws. 

Bryant's specializes in barbecued sparc- 
ribs and barbecued beef—the beef sliced 
from briskets of steer that | been 
cooked over a hickory fire for 13 hours. 
When I'm away from Kansas City and 
depressed, I try to envision someone 
kı the counterman at 
Bryant's and ordering a beef. sandwich 
to go—for me. The counterman tosses 
a couple of pieces of bread onto the 
counter, grabs a half pound of beef 
from the pile next to him, slaps it onto 


i 
—but I have al 


barbecue specialist. He ever 


ve 


INTERI 
REVEN 
SERVICE 


“Sure, І keep tax records. In my file 


cabinet under 


Shu" 


the bread, brushes on some sauce in 
almost the same motion, and then wraps 
it all up in two thicknesses of. butcher 
paper in a futile attempt to keep the 
customer's hand dry as he carries off his 
prize. When Im in Kansas City and 
depressed, I go to Bryant's. | get a 
platter full of beef and ham and short 
ribs. Then I get a plate full of what are 
undoubtedly the best ich-fried. pota- 
toes in the world. (“I get fresh. potatoes 
and I cook them in pure lard," Arthur 
Bryant has said. "Pure lard is expensive. 
But if you want to do a job, you do 
а job.) Then I get a frozen mug full 
of cold beer, But all of those are really 
side dishes to me, The main cour 
at Bryant's, as s Im concerned, is 
something that is give free—the 
burned edges of the brisket. The count- 
erman just pushes them over to the side 
and anyone who wants them helps him- 
self. I dream of those burned edges. 
Sometimes, when I'm wil, over- 
priced restaurant in some strange town, 
down some three-dollar 
nburger that tastes like a burned 
sponge. a blank look comes over me: I 
have just realized that at that very mo- 
ment, someone in Kansas City is being 
given those burned edges free. 

Marvin and I had lunch with a young 
lawyer in his fim. (1 could tell he was а 
comer: He had spotted a hamburger 
place at 75th and Troost that Marvin 
thought nobody knew about) We talked 
about some hotdog places and we had 
а long discusion about a breakfast 
lled Joes. "I would have to 
at the hash browns at Joe's are the 
equivalent of the Toddle brow Mar- 
vin said judiciously. "On the other 
hand, the cream pie at the Toddle House 
r surpasses Joe's cream pie” Pr 
assured M n that I wouldn't think. 
of leaving town without having lunch 
at Snead's Bar-B-Q. Snead's cuts the 
burned edges off the brisket with a litle 
more meat attached and puts them on 
the menu as “brownies.” They do the 

me thing with 


I don't like Sncad's 
brownies quite as well as the burned 
edges at Bryant's, but that’s like say 
‘Tolstoy was not quite up to Dostoievsky 
as a writer, A mixed plate of ham and 
beel brow makes a marvelous meal— 
particularly in conjunction with a cole 
slaw that is so superior to the muck they 
serve in the East that my wife, who had 
been under the impresion that she 
didn't like cole slaw, was forced to adı 
that she had never really 
1 she showed up. ar an ad 
age, at Snead’s. 
two or three hours of eating, the 
young lawyer went back to the ollice 
("He's а nice gu 
k that theory of his about the 
папа-сгсдт pie at the airport coffee 
and Магу 
Bryant hi 


ng 


sted the truc 


who is still pretty affable, even after 
being called Charlie for 25 years. When 
we mentioned that we had been custom- 
ers since the carly Fifties, it occurred to 
me that when we first started going to 
Bryant's, it must have been the only 
integrated. restaurant in town. It has 
always been run by black people, and 
white people have never been able to stay 
away. Bryant said that was true. In fact, 
he said, when mixed groups of soldiers 
came through Kansas City in those days, 
they were sent to Bryant's to eat. A vi 
sion flashed into my mind: 

A white soldier and a black soldier 
become friends at Fort Riley, Kansas 
“We'll stick together when we get to 
Kansas City.” the white soldier says 
“We're buddies.” They get to Kansas 
City. ready то go with the rest of the 
guys in the outhit to one of the over- 
priced and underseasoned restaurants 
that line the downtown streets. But the 
lady at the U.S. О. tells them that those 
restau not меа һас 
they'll have to go to “a litle place 
in colored to They oop toward 
Bryant's, the white soldier wondering. as 
the neighborhood grows less and less 
like the kind of neighborhood he asso- 
dates with decent restaurants, if not 
paying attention to the color of a man's 
skin is such a good idea after all. When 
he gets 10 Bryant's storefront with 


из are int 


five huge, dusty jugs of barbecue sauce 
sitting in the window as the only decora- 
tion—he is almost ready to desert hi 
friend. "Then he enters. He is in Tur 
SINGLE BEST RESTAURANT IN THE WORLD. 
All of the other guys in the outfit are at 
some all-white cafeteria eating tasteless 
mashed potatoes. For perhaps the only 
time in the history of the republic, vir- 
tue has been rewarded. 

Bryant told us that he and his brother 
g the 


learned everythi у knew about bar 
becue from а man named Henry 
who originated barbecue in Kansas City- 
“He was the greatest barbecue man in 
the world.” Bryant said, "but he was a 
mean outfit." Perry used to enjoy watch- 
ng his customers take their first bite of 
1 sauce that he made too hot for any 
human being to eat without eight or ten 
years of working up to it, When Arthur 
Bryant took over the place that had 
originally been called Perrys #2. 
calmed the sauce down, since the sight 
that made him happiest was not а aus 
tomer screaming but a customer v. 
g. Arthur Bryant is proud that he was 
the one who introduced French [ries and 
that he was the one who built up the 
business. But he still uses Perry's ba 
recipe for the sauce ("Twice a year I 
make me up about 2500 gallons of it") 
and Perry's method of barbecuing, and 
he acknowledges his debt to the master. 


he 


He keeps jugs of barbecue sauce in the 
window because that was Henry Perry's 
trademark, I immedia thought of 
a conversation I would have to 
h the mayor and the city council of 
ansas City: 


ME: Have you ever heard of 
Henry Perry? 

MAYOR. AND CITY COUNCIL. (in uni- 
son): Is that Commodore Perry? 
o, that is Henry Perry, who 
barbecue to Kansas City 
from Mississippi and therefore is the 
man who should be recognized as the 
one towering figure of our cultur 
v couxcn: Well, 
we believe that all of our citizens, ve- 
Чез» of th national 


MAYOR AND Ci 


r color or 


wes What P can't understand is 
why this town is full of statues of the 
farmers who came out to steal land 
from the Indians and full of statues 
of the businessmen who stole the 
land from the farmers but doesn't 
even have a three-dollar plaque 
somewhere for Henry Perry. 

MAYOR AND CITY COUNCIL: 
we certainly thi 

Mr: As you politicians are always 
saying, we have got to reorder our 


Well, 


priorities 


your haii 


Now that your 

‚ hair is longer, | 
you need 
Wella Balsam. | 


Because Wella Balsam conditions 
. Keeps it looking healthy | 
and great. Makes it much easierto | | 
comb and manage, too. You just | 
slosh it on in the shower after 
you shampoo. Be sure you get 
Wella Balsam. Only Wella makes 
theoriginal Balsam, and it's 


Wela | 
balsam 


great stuff. Wella Balsam. 
s | ntent 
| tar conditione 
teases troubled a 
seconds кз 


© 1972 The Walla Corp. 


» 
e 
m 
ГА 
Lj 
ы 
A 


210 


SUPERINTELLIGENT continued from page 120) 


mile farther, caught and killed it. 
Pleased, the hunter walked the mile 
north back to his camp to find it had 
been ransacked by a second bear. 
the bear that tore up 


15. bucket coni 


One 
water, another a gallon of alcohol. A 


ins a gallon of 


cup of alcohol from the sccond bucket is 
poured into the buckct of water. А сир 
of Шет 
back into the bucket of alcohol. Is 
there: (а) more water in the alcohol 
than alcohol in the water? (b) more 
alcohol in the water than water in thc 
alcohol? (c) the same amount of 


ling mixture is then poured 


in the alcohol as alcohol in the water? 
16. What do the following words have 
in common? deft, first, calmness, can- 
ору. laughing, stupid, crabcake, hijack. 
17. Some Pravwoy readers are geniuses. 
All geniuses have some human у 
. Therefor 
readers all have some 


as redeeming qu: 


а. PLAYBOY 
virtue. 


as T, X, Hare 
to: (a) V. L, G; (b) B, F, Y; (c) W, M, 
x (N, 


“Did you see the way he flared up when T 
suggested abolishing the monarchy? I thought he 
was supposed to һе such a liberal.” 


19. This is 
views of à 


enginecring drawing, two 
object: 


1 


FRONT VIEW TOP view 
What is le view like? What is the 
perspective view? 

20. A s is at anchor. Over its side 


gs а rope ladder with rungs a foot 
apart. The tide rises at the rate of eight 
inches per hour. Ac the end of six hours, 
how much of the rope ladder will re- 
n above water, assuming that 
feet were above water when the t 
began to rise? 
camp cook wants to measure four 
ounces of vinegar out of a jug, but he 
a fiveounce and a t 
. How can he do 
y dislikes the catcher. Ed's sister 
ed to the second baseman. The 
center fielder is taller than the right 
fielder, Harry and the d eman 
live in the same building. Paul and 
Allen cach won 520 from the pitcher at 
pinochle, Ed 
ing th The pitch- 
the third baseman’s sister. 


le 


па 


poker du 


All the b 
len, Harry 


and the shortstop lost 
$50 each at the race track. Paul, Harry, 
Bill and the catcher took a trouncing 
from the second baseman at pool. Sam 
volved in a divorce suit. The catch- 
the third bı 
. Ed, Paul, 
nd the center fielder are bachelors. 
The others are married. The shortstop, 
the third baseman and Bill cach 
ng on the fight. 
Welders is either Mike or 
Andy. Jerry is taller than Bill. Mike is 
shorter than Bill. Each of them is һау. 
jer than the d 


Using these facts, determine the 
names of the теп playi i 
ions on the 


1. Twenty-eight days. On the 28th day, 
the smail reaches the top of the well. 
Once there, it does not, of course, slip 
backward, 

2. Twenty. Did you forget 90, 91, ete? 
3. John, while James had had 


had had "had had." “Had had" had 
had a bener effect on the teacher. 
4. Pick a fruit [rom the APPLES AND OR- 


ANGES box. If it turns out to be an 
ge, since all the boxes are wrongly 
labeled, the box label must be ch 


ed 


©1972 n › mevniaros Tosco co. 


Smoking. 


Whatare you going tod 
about it? 


Many people are against cigarettes. You ve heard their arguments. 

And even though we're in the business of selling cigarettes, we're not 
going to advance arguments in favor of smoking. 

We simply want to discuss one irrefutable fact. 

A lot of people are still smoking cigarettes. In all likelihood, they'll 
continue to smoke cigarettes and nothing anybody has said or is likely to say is 
going to change their minds. 

Now, if you're one of these cigarette smokers, what are you going to do 
about it? You may continue to smoke your present brand. With all the enjoyment 
and pleasure you get from smoking it. Or, if tar and nicotine has become а 
concern to you, you may consider changing to a cigarette like Vantage. 

(Of course, there is no other cigarette quite like Vantage.) 

Vantage has a unique filter that allows rich flavor to come through it and 


yet substantially cuts down on ‘tar’ and nicotine. نے‎ 

We want to be frank. Vantage is not the lowest ‘tar and | VANTAGE | 
nicotine cigarette you can buy. Butit well may be the lowest | | | 
‘tar and nicotine cigarette you will enjoy smoking. It has only | 


12 milligrams ‘tar’ and 0.8 milligrams nicotine. The simple 
truth is that smoke has to come through a filter if taste is to 
come through a filter And where there is taste, there has to be 

Seed VANTAGE 
some ‘tar — ан 

But Vantage is поса ‘hernia’ cigarette. ^ 
You don't have to work so hard pulling the taste 
through it that all the joy of smoking is lost. A 
Anditis theonly cigarette that gives you so 
much taste with so little ‘tar’ and nicotine. 


We suggest you try a pack. [| мшш cr" 
four ed. 
12% 
0835. 


Filter and Menthol: 12 mg."tar", 0.8 mg.nicotine—av. per cigarette, FTC Report Aug. 71 (Menthol by FTC method). FILTER AND MENTHOL 


Е 


> 

o apples and apple 

а s which? Simple. Remem- 
all mislabeled. 

D simply switch the two remaining labels. 

" 5c 

a 6 

^ 


us. 
9. Bookkeeper. 
10. Three hows and three minutes 
Once the amoeba in the first jar has 
reproduced itself (a process that 
three minutes), that jar is at the sa 
point at which the second jar sta 


The only difference is that it is direc 
tes d. 


12. Since all three applicants raised their 
hands, there were two possibilities: two 
black and a white or three black marks 
П there were a white mark on any 
forehead, two men would see one black 


212 “Hey! We'd better get out of these wet things" 


instantly 


one white and would 
deduce that the third n 
black. Since this i lution did 
not occur, each of the three me 
two black marks. Тһе е. all were 
black, including the m 
cessful applicant 

13. There 10 birds and 20 a 
‘The problem may be expressed in equ 

on form as follows, letting А repre 

nimals and B repre 


A+ B= 30 
4A + 2B = 


and 


1 saw 


M. White. It is a polar bear, for the 
North Pole is the only place where you 
can go one mile south, one mile 

end up i 


st 


and one mile north and 
your starting point. 
1&.€ 
16. АШ of them contain thre 
tive letters of the alphabet in 
cal order. 


17. С. 
18. C. 
19. 

тор view 

Ррєяврестик 
view 

FRONT VIEW sue VIEW 
20, Since the ship is alloat, the water level 

relation to the ship stays the same. 


Therefore, eight feet are above the w: 
ter at the end, t the begi Ё 
Pour the fiveounce container full 
om the jug. Pour the three-ounce con- 
tainer full from the five-ounce contain- 
er, leaving two ounces remaining 
fiveounce container, Pour thc 
ounce container back into th 
pour the two ounces remaining in il 
fiveounce container into the th 
ounce container, Pour the five-ounce 
full from the jug. Fill the 
g one ounce of the thre 
ounce container from the five-ounce 
container and four ounces are left in 
the fiye-ounce con 
29. Harry is the pitcher, Allen the catch 
er, Paul the first 1 n Jerry the 
second baseman, Andy the third base 
man, Ed the shortstop, Sam the leli 
fielder, Mike the right fielder and Bill 
the cemer fielder. 


аст. 


em: 


TAKING OVER VERMONT 


the Leonard and F 
enabled them 10 g 
Isle (now Cleaver) County in the mid- 
dle of Lake Ch The Students 
Tor a Democrati му weren't so for- 
tunate. Their dr New 
Left staging а 
died aborning whe 
in Burlington rechriste 
Tower the Herbert Marcuse Monument, 
a dozen Weathermen slipped 
demolished Gener: 
Systems Department, ng ma 
taliation [rom the National Guard 
+ were other setbacks (such as 
c of the Moog synthesizers to 
gize the Marlboro Music. Festi- 
val), bur in general, the Movers. made 
steady gains—and for some surpris 
reasons. For one, they encountered. соп 
siderably less economic hardship than 
originally anticipated. Repeated. appear- 
ances by Blumstein and Phelan оп The 
Dick Cavett Show not only persuaded 
their fellow Yale graduate to build 
an A-frame house and make his le 
residence in Middlebury but gene 
ated widespread vicious support for 
amestown Seventy.” Donations poured 
into the Montpelier headquarters—trom 
wealthy liberis bent on redeeming 
themselves for their collaboration. with 


(continued [rom page 150) 


lism, from. 


the forces of mindless materi 
even wealthier conservatives са 
courage the decentralizing doctrine that 
underpinned the project and from st 
dents at the nation’s colleges and uni- 
Indeed, institutionalized links 
between several univ and com- 
s in Vermont not only helped 
al support but assured a 


sities 


munit 
provide financ 


steady flow of new settlers as well. 

The Movers augmented this assistance 
by setting up a number of thriving 
cottage industries, most notably the pro 
duction of the now-ubiquit red. 
whiteand-blue sweat shirt with MOVE FOR 


A BETTER AMPRICA stenciled on the back 
ad a bust of Horace Grecley on the 
front. Morcover, many Yankees proved 
far Пот antagonistic when it came to 
making a fast profit selling goods, serv- 
ices the Movers. Thi 

proved ly felicitous develop- 
me! monters salted 
away this са d retired to 
warmer amd politically more manquil 
climes, thus further lowering the elector 
al tipping point. Their departure also 
helped case the housing shortage, one 
that never reached. the dire dimensions 
predicted because of the "Toyota Con 
toga, the compact, all-weather 

home that J an 


d land to 


sh bonanza 


mobile 


g in 


m be 


the U.S. in 1973 for $3500. Besides these 
unforeseen solutions. the Burger Court 
proved wholly sympathetic to the Mov 
ns. Not only did it uphold the 
will in Blumstein ws. Tennessee but 
all attempts by the state of Vermont to 
block the new arrivals with dilatory le 


gal niceties were promptly struck down. 
By far the most unexpected support, 

however, came from the Nixon Ad- 
i n. Despite repeated. pleas. by 


Vermont's 
тепе lobby 


ator George Aiken and i 
g on Capitol Hill by the 
maple-sugar industry, the President con. 
sistently endor mestown Seventy.” 
“The goals of these young people are 
altogether with our great 
American he proclaimed at 
tennial celebration 
in Philadelphia. Predictably, some cynics 
questioned. the President's. sincerity, in- 
sisting that what actually excited him 
about the Movers was the prospect. ol 
isolating so many potential troublemak 
ers in a readily surroundable compound 
Nor was this view weakened when The 
New York Times reported that Vice 
President Agnew, the Republican Presi- 
candidate, had quipped in one 
wc-evening phone conversations 
ob Hope that Vermont should be 
called ihe. Rotten. Apple State and. that 
if he lost the election, he mi 
the barbed-wire business. St 


go into 


vhatever 


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PLAYBOY 


214 


its real purpose, the Administration in 
no way used the enormous resources at 
its command to make life difficult for 
the Movers. And now, in the summer of 
1976, their goal scemed closer at hand 
than ever as thousands more migrants 


mived in the spurred by the 
"New Spirit of ation- 
wide advert igned by Doyle 
Dane Bernbach, whose entire creative 


department had moved to St. Johnsbury 
in 1974. 

In the Movers’ first effort to consolidate 
power state-wide, they decide 10 sponsor 
an entire ticket [or statewide executive 
and legislative offices, attempting to unite 
their disparate constituency behind ihe 
immediate goal of peaceful. political take- 
over. Stumping the state, the candidates 
promise that once control is achieved, all 
Movers will be given а voice in how the 
state is run, not only through the legisla- 
ture but in the executive branch as well. 
At a widely publicized vigil in font of 
Calvin Coolidge's birthplace at Plymouth, 
they reiterte “Jamestown Seventy’ 

ring that “If the new majority be- 
mes involved in fragmented political 
bickering, the traditionalists might mai, 
iin the balance of power” despite our 
numbers. As we all know, "Revolutionary 
groups have had a history of declaring 
war on their closest ideological ally, [and] 
such а pattern in the early stages of our 
political struggle might torpedo 
hance for hegemony. 

Already. in fact, fissures have be 
appear. The Sicinem County. Council, 
for example, voted seven to five in favor 
of a resolution dema: more women 


captain has an eye for the ladies. 


on the ticket. Blacks in both Wilkins 
and Cleaver counties have demonstrated 
increasing anger over the predominantly 
white slate, though a weeklong summit 
meeting of moderates and militants at 
Enosburg Falls failed to produce agree- 
ment on black substitute candidates. 
Disdaining politics altogether, Abl 
Holtman insists he and his Yippies will 
boycott the November election and then 
secede from the state. Meanwhile, the 
Nader County Consumers’ Cooperat 
threatens to create a major housing ai 
nding th 


sis with a suit dem: ar Toyota 


ternecine (тел һе 


Despite these 
summer polls give the Movers ап even 
ке of winning and, as they enter the 
homestretch, our scenario ends. Could 
they make it? And if they did. could 

ү (or anyone ehe) hold such an 


nents 
chaos? Perhaps not gain, telling 
olf a king and dumping all his tea also 
seemed somewhat unlikely at the time. 
Whatever the odds, Blumstein and Phe 
lan are convinced it сап be done. Nor 
do they insit on Vermont. In a foot 
to whomever it may concern, they 
conveniently list the nation's ten least 
Alaska (302,173), Wyo- 


note, 


populous state 


ming (332416), Vermont (144,732), 
Nevada .738), Delaware (548,104), 
North. D: (617,761), South Dakota 
(666.257). (604.100). Idaho 


(715,008) and New Hampshire (737.681 


THIRTY-CALIBER ROACH CLIP 


(continued from page 104) 


overlapped with Deep South, with a sing- 
song calypso tone from the Bahamas 
and some remote edge of European pr 
cision, a lilt of Lithuanian or Serbian or 
Flemish. Captain Valiant is a generous 
host and always rolls a few Js for his 
guests; his favorite papers are those mini- 
ature replicas of 5100 bills. He often 
holds a joint in one hand. a straight 
cigareue in the other. smiling, his accents 
gently maneuvering for dominance. 

He is very fanlistic about the twists 
and kinks in his fortunes. His last voyage 
left him 58000 in the hole simply because 
! acts refused to pay off. И wasn't 
exactly a double cross, It was a fumble 
job. The financing was bizarre, everyone 
froming for everyone else, exch pi 
handling merchandise and making а 
rangements on credit and on consignment. 
And then things came unglued. Bales of 
pot simply got lost. Money went astray, 
People wandered into the deal to serve 
no particular funcion and then wan- 
dered out again. Captain Valiants boat 
needs to be hauled out to have the bot- 


s con 


arty 


run 
g needs t0 be overhauled and 
the boat could use a new suit of 
Down below in a hammock of ne 
the crew's supper—a large Bermuda 
onion and three frostbitten orar 
swings with every pitch and roll of the 
boat. 

The crew on his boat is in a constant 
Пих. People come aboard to spend а 
night. They make a voyage or stay a 
month. Women come aboard to visit or 
to liv < 


Once there was а reshuffüng and his own 
woman became exclusively the mate’s. She 
got pregnant and they went off to Nebras- 
ka together, to settle down and get it 
happily straight forever. 

Captain Valiant was off one day when 
а lady in residence became uncomfortable 
in the heat and disturbed by the constant 
wake of speedbouts, Chris-Crafts and sight 
secing cruisers that came around the bend, 
blowing whistles, churning the water, 
rocking the boat up against the fenders 
and the pilings, To shut it all off, she 
went away, dropping a little acid to speed 
her trip, stripping off her clothes to en 
joy the breeze. Later she rolled up a little 
someth a picce of para- 
ph a bullet engineered to serve 
as a roach clip, the powder removed, 
the primer exploded. The projectile was 
loose in the cartridge. To the bottom was 
attached an adjustable clip of brass. 
When removed, reversed and inserted 
ard into the cartridge, it made a 
adroit holder for the joint The 
bullet was .30 caliber, the size used in 


ng and got out 


D 


the obsolete MI rifle, The apparatus is 
called а Kent эшне Special. 
Feeling thirsty. the 


strolling through the boat ya 


lady went ashore, 


1. buttocks 


and breasts quivering with a languid 
cestasy. She was humming to herself. 
gracefully holding the roach clip iu two 


for 
lips 


fingers, raising it to her mouth 
an elegant toke, eyelids Hutter 
puckered into an elongated. kis. The 
men in the workshops paused in their 
labors. Short-hairs. every they si 
lently watched her progress, their fingers 
perilously close to table saws, band saws, 
drill presses ani planers. Leisurely, she 
meandered the graceful 
bows of sailing yachts, as though she 
herselt 1 


one, 


alo! 


passis 
tached Irom 
beneath the bowsprit of an ocean. voy- 
ager. She reached the vending machine 
next to the supply room, dropped in a 
dime and a nickel. removed a сан ol 
Fresca and musingly strolled back 10 the 
vessel of dreams from whence she came. 


1 just come u 


Dotty lives in an ordinary house in a 
suburban development of Coral Gables. 
She is a tough, plump woman in her 
mid410s who has ma «d to close the 

саста! Her talk is 
nid shoots it 


ion gap completely 
d obscene. She trips 
and blows grass right along w 
d daughter. Her house 
derground. intrigue. Kids crash on 
‚ on the floor. in sleeping b: 
out in the car. They eat there and they 
ball and they watch TV. For a lon! 


her 


а center 


lance. But one day the nares on dut 
were looking through their binoculars 
ted to sce seve 


pairs of 


binoculars staring right back at them, 
from a tee from a Venetian blind, 
from the center of the drapes. Some 


. five people ran out of five 


time late 
doors to jump 


to five cars to burn rub- 
ber in five different directions. none of 
which was the right one. Still Later, 
Dotty came home and found а crocus 
sack full of pot lying by the back door 
Some friends in another gang, being 
followed by other n 1 decide 
diop it oll at her place for safekeeping 


© 


м 


Si 
ice that clearly 


Ке! Joc speaks with a loud. hoar 
ates his су 
v with it. his 


va 


about the world, hi 


frustration, He still wears a fall beard as 
part of his protest against the establish- 
ment Bur to show his disgust with hip- 


h drugs. he has shaved his 
Snorkel got his nickname 
ven 


pics and wi 
head. cle 
while 
intensive training as a member of an mi- 
derwater demolition team. He is current- 
ly employed as a yacht captain in Palm 
Beach. his main occupation baby-sitt 
hh а 20-year-old multimillionaire. 


in the Marines, having been s 


NS 


But Snorkel was once a dealer in 
Coconut Grove. his chick formerly an 
active member of the SDS while 
University of Florida. There was music 
Drugs. bu 
ness to all their friends. trusting, believ- 
ing. very high on revolution and very 
high on themselves But gradually Snor- 
kel became disillusioned with the lack of 


t the 


ies. They told all the 


discipline. the kick of initiative. the ut- 
ter disregard for personal responsibility. 
His own friends ripped him off. He got 


stood up. pur down. badmouthed and 
fucked’ over. One friend. accepted 54000 
in advance to make a run with а boat and 


then disappeared, Another in ап 
ment with Snorkel about the proper 
se to мест and then settled the ques- 
ion by pulling a gun. It was capitalism. 
Tt was ego. Ht was cops and robbers, It was 
Popeye the Sailor. 
Snorkel Joe 
while he was in 
licited fin 


got 


cou 


arranged 
the 
rea 


many trips 
business. He so- 


ted. 


personnel, 


worked out problems of logistics. Hc 
provided. shelter. coun 
Опе а I 
planes was observed by clandestine FBI 
nd Customs agents. They took telescopic 
pictures while the loading was in progress 
the serial numbers clearly visible on the 
fuselage. The plane was tracked by radar 
during its trip through the Windward 
Passage and through the Bahamas, North 
nd west of Andros Island, it disappe 
over the Gulf Sticam, An hour Liter, 
appemed again, headi 
Miami International. Whi led. 
an army of agents. fell upon it, only to 
find it absolutely dean, 


serated. 


“1 


The pilot flew jets for one of the 
major airlines. He was an Ай Force 
veteran of both Korca and Vietnam and 


knew all about flying beneath а radar 


cover. Rather than take a chance on the 
possible inaccuracy of the altimeter and 
thar indeterminable question of the floor 


of the Air Defense Identification Zone. 


215 


PLAYBOY 


216 


he brought the plane all the way down 
to ten feet above the water. 

He landed at the simple, isolate 
strip on South Bimini Island. Like most 
of the fields scattered through the Baha- 
mas, there is no control tower and there 
is no radio. just a single runway laid 
down in the scant, rocky underbrush. 
Unobserved, the plane taxied to the far 
end. Two men appeared out of the 


air- 


scrub. quickly unloading the pot, their 
small boat anchored nearby just beyond 
the mangroves. The plane taxied 
10 the fuel truck, filled up with 
took off. 


k 


and 


of Snorkel’s friends is still 
g three years in the Gen- 
at Kingston. He 
loading up at an old airstrip aban 
doned after World War Two when the 


was 


pigs started coming out of the woods 


blowing whistles and yelling through 
bullhorns, He grabbed as much pot in 
his arms as he could carry, ran to the 
plane and. jumped in, screaming to the 
pilot, “Lers go! Take oll! Lets get 
out of here.” But the pilot just sat ther 
perfectly relaxed. looking at him with- 
out moving. | owing with the 
aloof beatitude of fate itself. 

The Jamaica f nted a confes- 
sion. The guy refused, They fired their 
pistols repeatedly right next 10 his head 
until both cardrums ruptured and were 
bleeding. After he signed a statement, 


s face 


been. playing а game. He just happened 


1o be "it: 
Snorkel Joe has had only а few hours 
ol flying lessons himself. But he is an 
expert 
ever handled involved the use of b 
one of them a large luxury custom-built 
ht owned by а very 
nd of Richard Ni 
out the owner's knowledge, the captain 
left Jamaica with a full load of pot. 
headed for Miami. His wife was sup- 
posed to telephone ahead, giving his 
time of de 


па sa 


тигс and expected arrival. 
But she didn't. 


Coconut Grove was hysterica 


L Days 
went by. No one could guess that the 
glorious monster of a boat was suffering 
from generator trouble. For days the 
yacht just drifted, the captain taking 
everything apart and putting it back 
together without success. Finally, he de- 


cided to run the boat on its batteries, 
the 


middle of 
customs, 
backing her into a prominent slip in the 
poshest, most exclusive marina 
the twin engines like a Hell's Angel. 
ng with the controls, varooming the 
port engine and then the starboard, tying 
up, plugging in the power connection, the 
water supply and also a private telephone. 


aging it right into 
Nassau harbor, brazenly 


revving 


sent over from Coco- 
nut Grove, relooking couple to 
meet the capt а dark, quiet bar. 
But when he showed up, you could smell 
him as he entered the door, his dothes 
ing with the stro stink 
of dried pot. When he took them into 
the marina, the yacht could be smelled 
two blocks away, sacks of ganja heaped 
in cabins, in closets, stufied into the 
bilges, carelessly tossed into lockers, the 
ıl the wheelhouse. 
ndezvous was set up. Snorkel Joe 
s to meet the yacht at Great. Isaac 
rock. But Joe was so uptight about the 
whole deal thar he had a few joints on 
у ner 
Key. By the time he reached. Key Bis 
cayne, he had really got it off. So turned 
on by the idea of his very own President 
living right over there, їп that very 
house, he took no notice of the wind 
and the current and ran aground, practi- 
lly in Richard Nixon's back yard. 
He was overwhelmed by an angry 
swarm FBI agen, CIA agents, 
T 
down, s and questioned 
dreaming of plots, i 
nd treason. But Snorkel played it cool. 
They towed him back to the channel 
and let him go. With no more fooling 
around, he sailed over ло Great Isaac, 
picked up the stuff and sailed back in 
again, right past Nixon's compound, 
docking at a house not two miles away. 
From there it was carried up to Mem- 
phis in a U-Haul trailer. And that’s how 
‘Tennessee got turned on last winter. 


Messengers were 


nnel from I 


of 
nen and city police. They shook him 


arched his boa 


Does art rip off life? Or does p 
Ә ar? In the discothèques of south 
Florida, at the rock concerts. in the boat 
yards and airports, the coffeehouses, the 
communes, the head shops and leather 
stores, the university cafeterias and or- 
ganic restaurants. you cin hear the whis- 
pered rumors, tales, reports and legends 


pout the pot smugglers, their daring 
and their ingenuity. A plane flies from 


Bogotá every week with a full load of 


Colombia Red. But the pilot's brother flies 


an identical plane with the same color 
and the same identification numbers, 
"They stay within a few feet of each other, 
forming le blip on the radarscopes 


of the ADIZ. Just before ng. o 
splits off at Jow level and heads for а secret 
urheld, The other lands at Miami Inter- 
national. But this same gimmick was used 
ago on The 
ar about 


ame of the Game. 
stuff 


the flown in 


You h 
from Europe and dropped on icc floes 
off Newfoundland. It is picked up by 


about the kids who 
swim around the Mexican border with 
erproof packages around their waists 
and then come zooming in to the beach 
on their surtboards. You hear about the 


dog team. You hea 


who infiltrated a smuggling gang 
but then made the mistake of dropping 
cid. It changed his head completely. He 


sent his Бла; gion and 
now he himself is dealing in nickel bags. 

Paranoia is a favorite word these days. 
Yet you must think big if you are to 
survive in the smuggl me. You must 


ike yourself. You must be calculatin 
nd bold. You must be v logical. But 
you must never forget that the world 
really is out to get you. 

You t even operare a little coun- 
terespionage just to check up on what 
the opposition is doi 
with a forged letter of introduction and 
present yourself as a journalist. working 
on an assignment. Telephone Lieuten- 
nt Peart of the Broward County Sher- 
ils Department. He won't meet you. 
He won't let you see his face, He won't 
even talk to you without prior permis- 
sion from the assistant sheriff. Because 
Lieutenant Peart works as an u 
er agent for the narcotics squad. 
they don't like to call themselves that 
Ring the number and a 
swer, “Selective Enforcement.” 

Go to the Customs agency in Mi 
Sit in the front office of John H. Mose- 
ley. the special agent in charge. Be non- 
nt. Appear absentminded аз you 
eavesdrop on the telephone conversation 
in the next office. Listen to the long 

itation of persona ities of one of 
agents. He is described as an excel- 
lent man who works 20 hours a day and 
i competent. But he “is about the 
most disorganized man in the world.” 
He can never get his reports out He 
docs marvelous undercover work, but he 
just won't put anything on paper. 
John Moseley is an old-timer, smooth 
nd tough. With perfect politeness, en- 
thusiasm and willingness, he tells you 
absolutely nothing. Over and over again, 
he maintains that the Customs men are 
doing a good job. claiming to stop ten 
percent of the drug trafic. Only as you 
are making your goodbye does he admit 
that the job is like bailing aut the ocean. 

The publicinformation officer is ] 
Dinglelder. Solemnly, he gives you all 
the statistics. In the Miami area during 
1970, 90 percent 
seized than in 1969. H 


Provide yourself 


voice will an- 


ami. 


dow 


shish went from 
three pounds to 9412 pounds, which is 

ii of exactly 3050 percent. 
Dingfelder will describe the dogs they 
now have that were trained at Lackland 
Air Force Base, The graduation exercise 


ere: 


consists of their locating a pot stash 
sealed in a Mason jar and buried under a 
road. A demonstration was given on the 


White House lawn late 1970. A mixed 
sample of mail included a planted pack- 

a. The dog promptly found 
it, to great applause, Then he wouldn't 


“Won't you give me a second chance, Linda, before puttin 
Ы ; à EX 5 
down your impressions in your diary? 


217 


PLAYBOY 


218 


leave. sniffing at yet another package 
that. quite by accident, contained hashish. 

But Dingfelder won't tell you much, 
He can't tell vou much. If they knew 
what was happening, they would stop it 
and it wouldn't happen anymore. И it is 
really happening now. they don't know 
about it. Or if they do know, it's a secret 
and they can't tell you anything 

But yon know they аге catching on to 
the wicks. People ar busted 
way day and sentences geuing 
süffer. The Florida area now has ra 
picket planes. The Customs has its own 
scout plane and a helicopter. And one 
ob these days, it is all going 10 get 
violent. There 
standing by with M 16s while big trans 
ag place. The 
four new patrol boats 
hine guns. Two guys 
were recently caught in Great Тали 
bbed a ville and forced their w. 
making the police load up their 
plane again and refuel it. 

It is already too late for that old trick 


€ stories around of Kids. 


fers Bahamian 
government h 


mounted with n 


are 


of stopping at Georgetown, Exuma. for 
fuel and dumping the pot in the bushes. 


They are getting wise. The customs of- 
ficer there is called Bullet. He is very glum 
ous and once he even tried 


to stop a plane by running out onto the 
strip. But the smugglers revved up both 
nd went right at him 

аге of Cuba, You can get offi 
permission to fly over their territo 
by sending a cablegram to Acrocivil in 
На Send them all the details of your 
flight plan and send them the money for 
а reply. You must allow not less than 18 
hours, But remember: The Cubans 
death on drugs of any kind. 

А uimaran sailed out of Jamaica with 
1000 pounds of marijua iously over- 
loaded. because the load linc is very 
al with this type of boat. Bt hit 
in the Windward Passage 
to duck under the Ite of 
astern Cuba, It was caught by a Cuban 
gunboat, towed in and the two kids 
promptly accused of being CIA 
to defame the revolution 


by planting drugs. They were put on 
»w and threatened with 
squad. One of the kids was Canad 
the ambassador intervened in his beh 
The Cubans finally released them both. 
But first they built a bonfire on the beach 
and burned the pot. They went a 
the uimaran with brushes and buckets 
1 smeared all over the boat, the 
the hull, ails, the beds, the 
ig pots. the food, the mirrors—tow. 
ing it outside the territorial limits 
setting it adr 
Haiti is just as bad. Some guy wied to 
land at Great Inagua one night. But 
there is no connol tower there and no 
landing lights. Nassau radio advised him 
to continue on to Portau-Prince, They 
would notify the port by cable of his ex- 
pected arrival. But in truc island fashion, 
they forgot. The plane was making its 
тай ach when it was suddenly 
fired on by an ackack battery. The pilot 
was hauled off to a dungeon and was to 
he shot as а spy when the message arrived 
m Nassau the next day. They parched 
his plane up and he went on 
You can't land at the Americ 
c on G namo Bay unless 
emergency. If all you want is to buy a 
little gas, you'll have a lot of expla 
to do when those imelligence officers 
take all of you into separate rooms to 
check your I. Dis and your story. Other 
than а to 5 
some gui nd the bore 
dom of red tape you'll be 
treated simply but well. But when they 
put you up for the night in the bachelor- 
officers’ quarters. dont go wanderia 
around. Right behind the bu 
there is a fence that goes around th 
entire perimeter of the base. The Cu- 
own fence around that 
is mined. Ex m 
re are explosions 
nd birds Marines nerv 
at shadows. 


the 


decks, 


appre 


bans have th 
The whole 
ares are set ofl. TI 
triggered by dec 
ously blast awa 
Back up in the hills of G mo, 
the marijuana grows wild and is some 
times even. cultivated. Gitmo is counted 
as hardship duty. It takes months to get 
phone call through to the States. There 
nothing to do and nowhere to go. So 
nybody gets drunk and everybody 
turns on. Periodically. ihe M 
Hame-thrower teams around the fence to 
burn the weeds and brush oll the mii 
fields. Occasionally, they are sent off to 
destroy а new field of marijuana, Every 
body makes sure he stands downwind. 
Jamaica. The north coast is for the 
0 Day the Americans; 
British, At the 
there is a hi 
There 


Hes send 


me wester 
colony a 
nearby for skinny-dipping. Houses 
shared by college kids. Sometimes a 
yacht will anchor offshore. The freaks 


are 


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PLAYBOY 


220 


stay at local houses such as Miss Ruby 
where they can get a bed for two dol- 
is. There will be a toilet and running 
water. But at night there аге only kero- 
sene lamps. There are no screens on the 
windows and you will see several rats 
some of which will run across your bed. 
Presidente is the local honcho. а very 
dwarf, who will 


short man. almost 
teach. yon how to roll a scil and who 
might be persuaded to take you with a 
party of freaks to the local caves—-mud- 
dy. sewn with old tin cans, the few 
impressive stalactites illuminated. by a 
Coke bottle filled with kerosene, a twist- 
ed ray for a wick 

You сап score anywhere in Jamaica 
Every street corner has а hustler. The 


waiter at the Holiday Inn їп Montego 
Bay will whisper out of the side of his 
mouth, “Ganja?” Оп remote roads in the 
interior, ай суе] cats will yell out as 
you drive by, “Hey. hippie! [pronounced 
ce-pee] Want some grass, mahn?” At a 
of the grandest, poshest hotels on 
beach ly have to cross the roa 
to where the taxis шге lined up waiting. 
Everyone insists the ganja grows wild, 
but you can drive all over the island 
"4 a Can plant. The 
police patrol constantly and the courts 
still use the old British style of hand 


the 
1 


you d 


sce 


out fast. no-nonsense sentences—a m 
mum of 18 The 
gardens are kept in mounta 
even the crude, rocky, 
don't exist and where the police just 
do not venture, There are several major 


pont hs. clandestine 


п areas where 


tortuous 


regions of uninhabited mountains, the 
end of the covered. with 
topical rain foress where the Blue 


Mountains Y 


ach a peak of 7402 feet. 
The Cockpit Country is roughly 150 
square miles in size. There are no roads. 
One section is called the District of Look 
Behind. It is wild and rough, covered 
with simge, even, humpbacked peak; 
It is drier here and perhaps more ideally 
suited for Cannabis cultivation. АП these 


were once 
for runaway slaves who warred ag 
the 1 


sug: 


sh for over 100 years, ri 
г estates and ambushing patrols s> 
successfully that the British finally asked 
for peace. The descendants of those m: 
roons ave still up there, back in the hills. 

And so are the Ras Tafari bothers, a 
religious sect that uses ganja as a holy 
plant, the instrument of peace, tranqu 
lity and They arhivate it as much 
to disseminate God's will as 10 tnn a 
profit, They worship Haile Selassie аз 
their god. 

They are pretty weird cats. their 
beards and their hair long and done up 
in small, tight braids that are plastered 
with red mud. Stoned wherever they go. 


ne, 


they carry th 
themselves, 


ng the Old 
Testament, mumbling about Saint John 
the Baptist. Some of them are old men. 
toothless and ragged, who get busted 
and harassed by the local pigs when they 
become a nuisince. But. some of them 
are younger, neater and very cool. No 
one knows how many of them live up 
there in their shacks in the hills, tending 
their gardens. 

And no one knows how many fao- 
i dried ganja 
ks of one, five, ten, 95 
The kitchen t 
doesn't work up there—ther 
tricity. Instead, hydraulic-jack assemblies 
d. although one factory has a 
gine. An expert can tell 
you the source of 
style and size. One Rasta always wraps 
his "herbs" in paper and even imprints 
his signet ring on the wax sez 
Some Ras ns bel 
camation, Many are fully aware of the 
former lives, revelation having come to 
them through ganja and through medi 


© up there whe 


sed inte br 


sh masher 


ог 30 pounds. 
no elec 


tation and through reading the Scrip- 
tures. When the rurnedon American 
hippies started arriving in their Песі of 


rowing silver birds, wearing their savage 
costumes and their beards and their 
long hair and their peace symbols, dis- 
playing their scorn for governments and 
potice and war and modem materialism, 
it wits obvious to the Ras Talarians that 
they were actually soul brothers, not 
foreigners at lost ийе of heir 
own people not yet enlightened enough 
to understand their heri 
to join them nevertheless in the 
gle against the Babylon of Kingston, 
and who were coming in love, who were 
coming in peace, who were comin 
home at last. 

But all that has changed. The garden 
has been defiled, the brothers betrayed. 
The Ras Tafarims are no longer so 
tolerated, because the ¢ 1 clement 
wston has adopted their style. 


In 


ge but coming 


st 


Пот Ki 


The bandits also wear loi 


mountain 
xl beards and braids smeared with 
ıd. And these are mem mothers. They 
hod up cars at night. They 
md they kill. They 
over the ganja trade, organizing il. co 
rupting it. until now anybody who even 
looks like a Rasta is hassled by the fuzz. 

And the flower children? 

Robert attends a large party for aca- 
demic and literary types. He is high. He 
is the most highest. In the middle of a 
crowded room, people constantly excus- 
ing themselves to pas between him 
and his audience. he goes on amd on, 
ling, speeding, repeating the word 
молу 1152 times, nor at all afraid of 
getting busted because “nobody could 


li 


nap, they 


таре have taken 


prove anything” Besides, he could al- 
have them rubbed oi firs A 
contract would cost him only 

He is 19. He has organized and di 
rected and bank-rolled all kinds of deals 
to Mexico, 10 Canada, to Jamaica. to 
Colombia—coke, hash, pot, pills. As his 
oly friend grins and nods like a be 
tific metronome, Robert 
head wip. his eyes I 
of the 24 f 
jected ag; 

He says he was one of the b 
the 1 bn he 
stays in the background, several connec 
tions removed. He mentions by name a 
very high and very improbable olficial i 
Jamaica whom he paid off "to do busi 
He describes the secret airstrip 
that exports 3000 pounds of ganja every 
It is like Marij International 
tas and hus- 
in coded-color shirts and ringed bj 
16 machine-gun nesis. The serial num- 
y incoming plane have to 
those on а preananged 
When Robert himself 
there 10 make а deal. a knife was put to 
his throat; he was threatened with im- 
mediate death if it should tum out that 
he "wasn't groovy. 

There is $300,000 in cash buried, he 
says, in the ground on a farm where 
he once lived. His next operation will 
involve a shrimp boat, “because they 
don't get checked by Customs.” H any- 
body wanted to go along for the ride, 
- you know. Groovy 
on а scrap of paper but very cun- 
ningly puts down only his last initial 
Then he writes down two phone numbers 
where he could be ached. 

Knees bouncing. eyes strobing, he de 
scribes his start in the drug business. It 
all began when he helped out liis buddy 
whose Either was a Mafia figure involved 
in the smuggli 00 pounds of hero 
in. Bur his buddy's [ther way killed, 
vun mbage truck The kid 
wan re of the loot. 
When pay off, Robert 


ways 


ocs on with his 
g with every Mick 
second being, pro- 
I of his skull 
kers ol 
always 


Лом: 


caper 


ness," 


gree 


anded 


nent 


Rabert writes his 


gof 


over by 
al his 
nobody 


father's 4f 
would 


amd his buddy went up to New York 
amd put a gun against the head of a 
family саро. kidi 
and 


ping him to Florid 
him for a ramom of 
The kid split for Canada but 


holding 
00,000, 


gave Robert 520,000 for his help. 
He ist worried about the mafiosi. 
a conrad ow on him. all 


w they are looking for a blond 
with a mustache who is 64^ tall. Robert 
is actually one foot shorter than. that, 
You sce, when they pulled. their heavy 
number, he was wearing 12-inch stilts 
that were covered by the flare of his bell 
bottoms 

Like, man, 
know? 


з a can groove. You 


er thinks Americans 


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PLAYBOY 


222 


ONE WAY TO BOLINAS 


alongside Frank's little Fiat. Frank's little 
Fiat took care of the problem. I mean, 
you gor room in the jump scat," the girl 
said, "but Fm tired of cun 
round with mc. I don't supposc this is 
1 


conventional way to break up a r 
about it? I see it just 
ked very nicely. 
"You improvised,” Frank sai 
“Got to in this lile," 
g up at Frank, She act 
the bucket to face him and to heat 
side of with her smile. 
Well, she ran with her wrists turned out 
like that, but she was more than 17 
Well, that’s nice. 
"Where arc you going? 
Uh.” 
“Pm headed for Bolinas 
She grinned brilliantly 
hair out of her eyes, Evidently sh 
singed some front fringes, let's scc, 
ne organic bread in ап unpredictable 
oven. She had these singed fringes, like 
bangs. “Bolinas,” she repeated thought- 
fully. “Bolinas. Me, too. I've never been 
there. We were heading for Stinson.” 
Bolinas is just a few miles around a 
nd, on the same basic inlet and 
ch. But it's not on the 
ad north from San Francisco, 
and there's a colony of artists, poets and 
ed people, but fewer of the stoned 
ppies watching the road go by. fewe 
of the baked surfers pretending they are 
the northem branch of Malibu or La- 
guna. You used to be able to gather 
mussels on the beach at Bolinas, cook 
them over driftwood fires, have long lazy 
days with pink-and-white shellfish and 
© wine cooled in the Pacific tides 
nk used to like to do that with a 


tionship, but how 
w 


girl said, 
ly turned 


the 


nk asked. 


d shook her 
had 


(continued from page 121) 


couple of friends. You can still do it, only 
now you'll probably turn up a few weeks 
with hepatitis, and that tikes some 
of the fun out of it, But Frank drove up 
to Bolinas Irom time to time to ; 
grip on his immortal soul. He ate han 
burgers instead of mussels but walked 
on the beach alone and asked what he 
was doing. year after year. He never 
the complete answer. Now he might try 
it with this accidental roadside cr 
“Basically I was headed for S 
deep down.” she said. "Em leve 
but he'll be looking for . 
so I think D better go on with you to 
Bolinas. He's likely to, well. do 
whoever, whomever, he finds me with. 
Really cares, Frank thought. 
"And of course this yellow Fi 


you me 


is 


‚ which I know will upset 
it sinks in.” 


ksand 

“You pick up on things, don't you 
she asked. "When а fellow runs along 
the road, yelling. groaning and shaking 
his list at you, you pick up on it right 


away. 
“Thanks,” said Frank. “L have to live 
with my delicate reflexes.” 
“Smart?” said the girl. “I realize 
smart. Т think he killed somebody i 


Mexico. At least nobody ever saw the 
dude again. My name is Lana, 
Adams, that’s my real name.” 


na 


Frank then did one of his famous 
reflexive stabs ii 


the dark. "You 
away to Mexico with а drummei 
family was upset, he 
you're finding yourself, 
ups 


тап 
‚ your 
spade, now 
theyre still 


“Bul the United States Constitution guarantees us the 
2 5 n 
pursuit of happiness, doesn’t it?” 


bont me 
Мап, 


“How do you know so much 
all ar once like that?” she asked. 
you're terrific." 

“H's easy. Um afraid. You fall ino a 
groove.” 

She was humming and smili 
self. “You're so smart it desuoys me. 
ri ic. And you must be nearly 


to her- 


< i's not like that ar all, 
Boris is not a spade drummer, even if 
you picked up so smart about how I 


called 0 he killed a dude. ‘cause 
that's his word for kids he docs in. 
Consider that а smart crack, 


"Oh. I sure do." Frank said, 
"Mais tu as tort tout-de-méme;" she 
aid. “French major at Stanford. no 


diummer—why you say spade?—just 
Boris, that Boris back there, and I'm 
just taking off a quarter to live Céline a 
little, Queneau, Francis Carco, Clebert 
la vie de boheme. Wut. you win the 
Well Worn Conversation Prize of the 
summer 

“Merci bien.” said Frank. He decided 
to put all his energy into cornering, 

"Nevertheless, T imagine you're in- 
stinctively a very intelligent old. person, 
otherwise vou wouldn't get yourself in 
this kind of situation with à memorable 
face and automobile and some limited 
options about travel, when my former 
friend Boris back there—I call 1 


real name—is planning to give you a lot 
of physical trouble as soon as he catches 
up with you.” 
"Looking like he docs. it'll 


if he gets 
red. He just hates signing receipts, but 
hell do it for me. Now that he's done 
dealing for a few weeks. he wanted to 
е some fun spending the money and 
humping me. So he'll have his fun doing 
ings to you and then humping me 


—dry—if he c ^ that is” 

nk ler a few curves go by. She 
dealt pretty Гам, 100. A quick answer 
would be inappropriate at this stage of 


their match. What would prove he was 
really smart would be this: to pull up 10 
that gas station, stop the car, ask her to 


remove herself, and to move on alone 
maybe inland toward Novato for a 
couple of da sion in 
a plastic motel aming pool 


Going to Bolinas with this yo 
was really, Frank, no way to go. 

“Do you like making trouble 
people?” Frank said. 

“Who else?" she asked. 

He shut off his FM receiver. Do with- 
out Purcell at this moment of crucial 
concentra though it was the short 
trumpet Voluntary. which was his favo: 
ite wakeup music. She hummed alon 
with some other radio. Maybe she had 


lor 


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PLAYBOY 


224 


she said. "Um. I suppose 
so. 1 suppose I do. I owe you a serious 
answer, now that you're giving me this 
ride and all ich off 
the implant and stopped һипипё 
turned to him with one of those pe 
smiles, buds of teeth with hi 
pink folding flesh of mouth 
unabashed greedi 


ter 
it he was available 
for trouble, but he didn e she al- 
ready knew. He didn’t mind at all. He 
was looking for something and evident 
ly Lana Adams, her smile and her cool 
eyes were what he was looking for (also 
her tight lile behind). since he felt 
rt happy and focused for the first 
ime in months—since his divorce. since 
the minirecession that cut into the 
ley. since а couple of his best artists 
had gouen into speed and wiped them- 
selves out as producing painters. They did 

speedy j 


nk assemblage instead. 
Boli- 
The bartender dled the 
rentals for the couple of cabins out 
ttle extra 
twinge of illicit joy when he used his 
crédit cud and billed it to the Curtis 
Gallery. The was where the seri- 
ous drinkers of Bolinas dr Across the 
Smiley's, where the serious 
aers and ice- slurpers 
athered. Surfers and hippies and te 
ies, and now Frank Curtis, charging his 
good luck to the business. 

He put the yellow Fiat behind Sn: 


ics. But no trouble finding it from thc 

street if you were really lool He 

tried to hide it in the stand ol pine. 
They entered. the тоот, Lana and 


Frank, and began to do all soris of easy 
friendly thi the third 
lesson. of nergy class. Just 
nice. Just fun. But that sweet rump. 
But sweatier than A Oh, nice. 


Oh. nice.” she kept s 

“Tm forty, all right," he said. 

“Oh, that’s good. 1 heard about older 
men. Oh, nice.” 


Later, cooling, with the sound of wind 
in pine overhead, the sound of drunks 
n 5 s alongside, he said, “Older?” 
“Well, I don't count Boris. He only 
. Forty is what I call the water- 
ge, and he says he's thirty-four, 
you know, like Sonny of Sonny and 
Cher—remember them? Well, maybe 
he's crossed the watershed without tell- 
ng me the truth. Have to ask him next 
time he catches up with me." 
Next time?" Frank asked, 
she said and he 
felt that familiar choking in his chest. 
No, keep conuol; words don't change 
anything. 

“Next time what?” 

She thought for a moment. She turned 


on the implant. She w: 
"Boris doesn't seem to commit. crimes 
for money, unless you consider selling 
speed a crime, but rather to solve some 
personal difficulty or other. Нез not 
really a classical crimina her a 


s humming. 


going into a speed factory, the dust was 
all over, he didn't wcar a mas 

know. a surgical mask, so he b 
lot of it into his lungs. freaky. paranoid, 
so he” She paused for breath, “But 
1 doubt if he'll do that a 

Like a card, the face of Boris was 
turned up i nk's head in this sun- 
baked su room. ‘They were up a 
wooden ramp. They had no clothes on. 
She was lovely, slimming down fast, 
someday she might even be haggard. 
They would hear the feet of Boris on 
that ramp, wouldn't they? 

Wouldn't they what 

Wouldn't they do what they had just 
done once again? 

"Ooh. funky, you're a funky old 
man," Lama said. "I'm getting to know 
you. I like, oh, this, plus getting to 
know you." 

Afterward they walked on the beach. 
She turned a сит wheel. Oh, she was 
lovely, slimming down like that. The 
faint blonde fuzz on her tanned arms. 
The tight behind, She would never be 
haggard, mot in his lifetime. Pointed 
clawlike prints of her 1 the tidal 
nds and 


amer 


dear day, 


Islands visible ош th Japanese 
freighter visible. gulls visible, cloudlets of 
fog hiding the white city of 


the horizon. Some surfers 
les ast an uprooted 
They were cooking on a driftwood 
One was wearing a sleeveless khaki 
of a distant war. It wasn't 


above 


cisco 


is beach,” Frank said, 
“Where? Back to our cibinz 
Not a bad idea. “Well, let's get a ham- 
first and see.” 

“You think they got those dipped 
frenchburgers in this town: 
“Or aren't they much on sophisti 


she asked. 
aed 


Smiley's is across the street from Snarl- 
ie's. Smileys has hamburgers and milk 


shakes. From the back of the room, 
Frank could see a strip of yellow where 
ihe door of his F 


parked. amoi 
He hadn't really hidden it too well. The 
sib was so happy with food that he 
couldn't worry very seriously: pure cho- 
t brought back after- 
noons of ad wind, beach and 
water, girls Is, and he let himself 
ride with her. "You can just take oll like 
this?” she asked. "You don't mind goof- 
ng with me? You don't са 
Present or future,” he said. 
“Till death do us part,” she mur- 
mured, teeth squeezing into fried gran- 


ules of meat, squirting a few droplets of 
onto his denim shirt, 

He was following his own day like a 
progress report on a man who had sur 
vived a heart transplant. He was happy. 
He was healthy. He was watching for 
trouble. He was pretend 
be no trouble. He was tasting ple 
as if it were his last. He was ta 
pleasure as if ir would go on foreve 
was tying to tell the truth. He 
lying то himself. He was terrified. 

She smelled of sun, heat, 
wind and sex, Suddenly Fra 
10 gobble her up agai 


there would 


sure 


catsup. 


wouldn't have her for long. He wi 
her forever. She blinked and leaned 
near him. He kissed her. His eyes Mut- 


tered open and he saw, very near him, 
those round blue saucerlike cyes open 
and watching him. 

“Come on,” he 


aid. 


“I haven't finished my hamburger.” 
He waited. 
"But I've had 
Let's go." 
She 


Or on the bi 
ing sandals. 
street, she w 
der, her feet were ba 
with the hood up 


nd а mechanic work- 


It was 
twisted 


family lying in the sun on the sidewalk 
in front of Snarlic’s, There was a row of 
beer mugs on the ledge where customers 
had deposited them. Lana picked her 
way carelessly through broken gi 
Frank glanced down and read history on 
her feci—dirt from the street, buffed- 
dean skin from her running on the 
beach, distant baby flesh beneath that. 
She had dirty toenails, but who doesn’t? 

But who was she? 
nd who was he to be submitting like 
ihi? 

He was just following her up the 
wooden ramp to their room mber 
five. Before he had a chance to reach for 
the key, her hand went out and seized 
the doorknob, She knew it would open. 

She pulled him ir 

Boris w ng, his 
ing like a mine disaster. Lana was smiling 
fixedly, like a girl who is breathing am- 
phetamine dust as she walks through 
the speed faciory. Now she was having 
her summer adventure. Not just love 
with a new man. Something else. Love 
with a man who was about to have a 
lover. 


s wait 


ce still look- 


g something at 
nels were collapsing about 
him. Struggle for breath. Fight back 
all trouble, too carly to quit 


last. 


225 


gosh-darn thing every [ull moon, eh, Mr. Harper?" 


"Same 


PLAYBOY 


2% 


TERMINAL MAN „ишлерин page 165) 


Im. After 


d learned not to trust his 


moment, he said, “Will it hurt? 
No." 


il. "Go ahead. 

Gerhard, sitting on а high stool in the 
adjacent room, surrounded iu the dark- 
ness by glowing green dials of equip- 
watched the oneway 
Ross and Benson began to tal 
side Richards picked up 
the taperecorder microphone and sa 
quietly, "Stimulation series one. pati 
Harold Benson, cleven March 1971." 

Gerhard looked at the four TV 
screens in front of him. One showed the 
dosed-cireuit view of Benson that would 
be stored on video tape as the stimuli- 
tion series proceeded. Another displayed 
а computergenerated view of the 40 
clearede points, lined up in two paral- 
Jel rows within the brain substance. As 
cach electrode d, the ap- 
propriate point glowed on the screen. 


through 


him, 


was 


A third TV screen ran ап oscilloscope 
tracing of the shock pulse as it 
delivered. And a fourth showed а w 
diagram of the tiny computer 
son's neck. It also glowed, as stimula- 
tions went through the circuit pathways. 
In the room, Ross 
“You'll feel a variety of sensations and 
some of them may be quite pleasant. We 
want you to tell us what you feel. АП 


Ben- 


nex! 


saying, 


Richards said, lectrode onc, five 
millivolts, for five seconds." Gerhard 
pressed the buttons. The computer di: 
gram showed a tracing of the circuit 
wy closed, snaking its way through 
's 
They watched. Benson 
ay glass, 
That's an interesting 


һе 
the intricate electronic maze of Bensa 


neck computer. 

through the one 
Benson said, 

fecling.” 

an you describe it?" Ross asked. 

Well, it’s like eating а ham sandwich.” 


“Tue met some very cute men at women's 
lib meetings, but, unfortunately, they all expect 


you lo wor 


ajter marriage!” 


"Do you like ham sandwiche 
«d. "Not particularly 
ng at the control. panel, 
noted that the first electrode had stimu- 
lated a vague memory пасе. 

Richards: “Electrode (wo, 
volts, five seconds.” 

Benson said, “I have to go to the 
bathroom. 

Ross said, “It will p: 
sat back from the control 
sipped a cup of coffee and 
arched the interview progress. 
lectrode thee, five millivolts, five 
seconds.” 

This one produced absolutely no cf. 


five milli- 


fect on Benson. He was talking quiet 
Ross about bathrooms in restu 
rports—— 


gain,” Gerhard said. 

“Repeat electrode three, ten milli- 
volts, five seconds," Richards said. The 
TV screen flashed the circuit through 
electrode three. There still no effect. 
going to take a long time to go 
ll 40 electrodes, but 
ating to watch. They produced such 
strikingly different effects, yet each el 
trode was very close to the next. It wa 
the ultimate proof of the density of the 
brain, which had once been described 
as the most complex structure in the 
known universe. And it was certain 
true that there were three times as many 
cells packed into a single human brain 
as there were human beings on the face 
of the carth, 

“Electrode four," Richards 
the recorder, “five millivolts, 
onds.” The shock was delivered. 

And Benson, in an oddly diildlike 
voice, 1, "Could I have some milk 


was fas- 


id into 
five sec- 


in Gerhard 
ag the reaction. 


ds nodded. 


said, 


“How old would 


out five or six, at most. 

Benson talking about cookie 
talking about his tricycle, to Ross. $ 
ly, over the next few minutes, he seemed 
to emerge like a time traveler advancing 
through the years. Finally, his voice and 
manner were fully adult, thinking ba 
to his youth. He himself was no longer 
there ys wanted the cookies and 
she would never nc. She 
said they were bad for me and would 
give me cavities." 

Richards said, “Electrode five, 
millivolts, five seconds." 

In the next room, Benson shifted un- 
wheelch 


was 


alw 


уе them to 


five 


Ross 


ck electrode.” This happened 


sometimes, Occasionally, an electrode 


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“Madam, I would like to tell you in all sincerity and with 
greai respect that I'm selling knockers.” 


mulated а sei- 
erhard's work 


would be found that sti 
тше. Nobody knew why. С 


with programs like George and Ма 
tha had ded him to understand that 
relatively simple computer. instructions. 


could produce complex and unpredictable 
machine behavior. It was also true that 
the programmed. machine could exceed 
the capabilities of the programme 
was dearly demonstrated in 1955, when 
Arthur Samuel at IBM programmed а 
machine to play checkers—and the m 
chine eventually be t it 
self. 

Yet all this was done with computers 
that had no more circuits than the brain 
of an ant, The human brain far exceed- 
ed that number and the programm 
of the human brain extended over m: 
decades. How could anyone seriously ex- 
pect to understand i 

There was also a philosophical prob- 


lem: Gödels proof: that no system could 
explain isell and mo machine could 
underst is own workings. At most, 

ihat a human brain 


Gerl 


us of work, decipher a 
but a d could 
me «е 


perhu 


man brain 


puter would be developed that could 
untangle the billions of cells and 
hundreds of billions of interconnections 
the human brain, Then at last man 
would have the inform that he 
wanted. But man wouldn't have done 
the work—mother order of intelligence 
would have done it. And man would 
not know, of course, how the computer 
worked. 

Morris entered the тоот with a cup 
of collec. He glanced at Benson through 
the glass. 

Benson failed to react to electrode six. 
“Electrode seven, five and five," Rich- 
. He delivered the shock. 

In the next room. Benson sat up 
abruptly. "Oh." he said, “that was nice. 
Very nice.” His whole appearance seemed 
to Change subily. "You know,” he said 
after a moment, “you're really a wonder- 
ful person, Dr. Ross, Very attractive, too, 
1 don’t know if 1 ever told you before.” 

“How do vou feel now?” 

m really very fond of you,” Benson 
t know if I told you that 


tion 


In the other room, Morris nodded. “А 
strong P terminal, He's clearly turned 
on." 


с, 
sipped h 


Morris 
until 


note of it 
ted 


ade a 
coffee. They wa 


hard. 


blandly. 
ht, five mil- 
mulation sc- 


Benson settled. down. 

Richards said, “Electrode 
livolis, five seconds. he sti 
Ties cont. 


п 


At noon, McPherson showed up for 
inte No one was surprised to see 
him. In a sense, this was the irrevocable 
step: everything preceding it was unim- 
portant. They had implanted electrodes 
and a computer and а power pack, and 


they had hooked everything up. But 
nothing functioned ший the interfac- 
ing switches were thrown. It was a little 
like building an automobile—a 


then 
finally turning the ignition key. 

Gerhard showed him his notes from 
the stimulation series “At five millivolts 
on а pulseform stimulus, we have three 
positive Is and D 
"Ihe positives шге seven, nine 
one. The negatives are five а 
two. 

McPherson glanced at the notes, then 
looked through the glass at Benson, "Are 
any of the positives a true РУ” 


termi 


two 


у strong. When we stimulated 
him, he said he liked it and he began to 
ly aroused tow 


1 shook his 
“Not unless he 


head. 
were 


McPherson said, “We've got Ben- 
son in the hospital for several days. If 
ything seems to be going wrong, we 


can switch to other electrodes. We'll just 
for a 


keep wack of him 
rubbed his hands tog 
n with it 
seven and thirty-or 
to be the two logical choices.” 

Gerhard got off his stool and walked 
to a corner of the room where there 
a computer console mounted beneath a 
IV screen. He began to touch the but- 
tons. The TV screen glowed to life. 
Alter a moment, letters app 


while.” 


He 


can get Inter 


with 


BENSON, 

INTERFACE PROCEDURE 

POSSIBLE ELECTRODES: 40, DESI 
SERIALLY 

POSSIBLE VOLTAGES: CONTINUOUS 

poss 


DURATION: 


i CONTINUOUS 
POSSIBLE WAVE FORMS: PULS 


ONLY 


Gerhard pressed a button and the 
blank. Then 
tions appeared, to wh 
in the answers on the console. 


INTERFACE 
1. жас f 


PROCEDURE BENSON, HF 
CTRODES WILL BE ACTI- 


ому 


2. WHAT VOLTAGE WILL BE APPLIED TO 
ELECTRODE SEVEN? 
rive му 

з. WHAT DURATION WILL BE APPLIED 
TO ELECTRODE SEVEN? 
FIVE SEC 


There was a pause and then the ques- 
d 


him, 


tions continued for electrode 31. Gerha 
chi 
McPherson. said to Morris, “This is 
amusing. in a way. We're telling the tiny 
computer how to work. The little com. 
puter gets its instructions from the big 
computer, which gets its instructions 
from Gerhard, who has a bigger computer 
than any of them." 

“Maybe.” Gerhard said and laughed. 
The screen glowed: 


typed in the answers. W. 


INTERFACING PARAMETERS STORED. 
READY TO PROGRAM AUXILIARY UNIT. 


Morris sighed He hoped that he 
would never reach the point in his life 
when he would be referred to by a com- 
puter as an auxiliary unit. Gerhard typed 
quietly, a soft hissing sound. On another 
IV screen, they could sec the inner cir- 
cuitry of the small computer. It glowed 
intermittently as the wiring locked in. 


BENSON, HF HAS BEEN  INTERFACED. 
IMPLANTED DEVICE NOW READING EEG 
DATA AND DELIVERING APPROPRIATE 
FEEDBACK. 

That was all there was to it. Somehow 
Morris was disappointed; he knew it 
would be this way, but he had expected 
—or necded—something more dramatic. 
Gerhard ran a systems check that came 
back negative. The screen went blank 
and then came through with a final 


message: 


UNIVERSITY HOSPITAL SYSTEM 300 
COMPUTER THANKS YOU FOR REFER- 
RING THIS INTERESTING PATIENT FOR 
THERAPY, 


Gerhard smiled. In the next room, Ben: 
son was still talking quietly with Ross. 


TII 


Janet Ross finished the stimulation 
series profoundly depressed. She stood 
in the corridor, watching, as Benson was 
wheeled away. She had а last glimpse of 


the white band around his neck as 


the nurse turned the corner; then he 


was gone, 


She walked down the hallway in the 
other direction, through the multicol- 
ord NPS doors. She looked at her 
watch. Christ, it was only 12:15. She had 
alf the day ahead of her. What was it 
like to be a pediatrician? Probably fun. 
Tickling babies and giving shots and 
advising mothers on toilet training. Not 
a bad way to live. 

She thought again of the bandages on 


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PLAYBOY 


Benson's neck and went into Telecomp. 
She had hoped to speak to Gerhard alone, 
but instead, everyone was in the room— 
McPherson, Morris, Ellis, everyone. They 
were all jubilant, toasting one another 
with coffee in Styrofoam cups. 

Someone thrust a cup into her hands 
and McPherson put his arm around her 
in a fatherly way. “I gather we turned 
Benson on to you today. 

"Yes, you did," she 
smile. 

He smiled back. "Well, 1 guess you're 
used to tha 

Not exactly aid. 

The room got quieter; the f 
ing slid away. She felt bad about that, 
but not really. There was nothing amus- 
ing about shocking a person into sexual 
arousal. It was frightening and pathetic, 
but not funny. Why did they all find it 
so goddamned funny? 

Ellis produced a hip flask and poured 
dear liquid into her coffee. "Makes 
it Irish,” he said with a wink, "Much 
better." 

Gerhard was talking to Morris about 
something. [t seemed а yery intent con 
versation; then she heard Morris say, 
“You please pass the pussy?” Gerhard 
laughed; Morris laughed. It was some 
kind of joke. 

Ross slipped away [rom Ellis and 
McPherson and went over to 
He was momentarily alone: Morris had 
gone to fill his cup. "I want to know 
something. Can you monitor Benson here, 
on the main computer?" 

Gerhard shrugged. "I guess so. 
why bother? We know the impl 
unit is working” 
she said. "I know. But will 
anyway, as a precaution? 


id, managing to 


ard. 


ser 


but 
iced 


you do 
o 


he said. “ГИ punch in a moni- 
toring subroutine as soon as they leave.” 
He nodded to the group. “ГИ have the 
computer check on him twice ап how 

"How about every ten minutes?" she 


every ten n 
" she said. Then she d 
her coffee cup, feeling the warmth hit her 
stomach, and she left the room. 


1v 


Mis sat in a corner of room 710 and 
watched the half-dozen technicians ma 


neuvering around the bed. There were 
two people from the rad Iib doing a 


т 
dra 


liation 
ing 


check; there was one girl 
blood for the chem lab, to 
levels; there w 


check ster 


techn 
there were Gerhard 
ing а final look at the interface wiring. 

Throughout it all, Benson lay motion- 
less, breathing easily, staring up at the 
ling. He did not seem to notice the 


people touching him, moving an arm 
here, shifting a shect there, Finally, Ben- 
son stirred. “I'm tired,” he said. He 
glanced over at Ellis. 

Ellis said, “About ready to wrap it up? 

One by one, the technicians stepped 
back from the bed, nodding, collecting 
their instruments and the 
lelt the. room. Gerhard and Richards 
were the last to go. Finally, Ellis was 
alone with Benson. 

You feel like sleeping?” Ellis said. 

“I feel like a goddamned machine. I 
feel like an automobile in a complicated 
service sta I feel like I'm being 


s getting angry. Ellis could 
feel his own tension building. He was 
tempted to call for nurses and orderlies 
to restrain Benson when the attack came. 


said. 
Benson glared at him, breathing deeply. 
Ellis looked at the monitors ov 
the bed. The brain waves were becom- 
g inegular, moving into an atta 
configuration. 


Above the bed, a red monitor light 
blinked srwULATION. The brain waves 
spun in a disordered tangle of white 
lines for five seconds. Simultaneously, 
Benson's pupils dilated. Then the lines 
were smooth again; the pupils returned 
to normal size. 


Benson turned away, star 
the 


g out the 
afternoon sun. "You 
ly a very nice 


dow at 
know," he sai 


Ча ant iu" 


For no particular reason, Janet Ross 
went back to the hospital at 11 v. The 
NPS was deserted, but she expected to 
find Gerhard and Richards at work, and 
they were, poring over computer. print- 
out in Telecomp. They hardly noticed 
whe me into the room and got 
herself some coffee. “Trouble?” she said. 
head. “Now it's 
rst George refuse 
artha is becoming 
verything's screwed up. 

Richards smiled. "You have your pa- 
tients, Jan," he said, "and we have 
ours.” 

‘Speaking of my patient. . . 7" 

“OL course,” Gerhard said, geuing up 


she 


sole. "I was wondering why you came 
back in." He punched buttons on the 
console. Lette 
print out. "Here 


I started it at 
noon.” 
1:12 NORMAL EEG 


NORMAL 


ЕС 


1:32 SLEEP EEG 
1:42 SLEEP EEG. 


The list of ten-minute checks noted 
every interval until 11:02, continuing 
to alternate between normal EEG 
sleep EEG. "There were, however, print- 
outs reading STIMULATION EEG at 3:32, 
6:52, 9:02 and 10:52. 

“I can't make anything out of this," 
Ross said, frowning. "It looks like he's 
dozing off and on, and he's gotten a 
few stimulations, but"—she shook her 
head—"ismt there another display mode?” 
she spoke, the computer produced 
another report, adding it to the column: 


паз NORMAL EEG 
"People," Gerhard said with mock ir- 
ritation. “They just can't handle ma- 


chine data." Tt was true. Machines could 
handle column after column of num- 
bers. People needed to sce patterns. On 
the other hand, machines were ус 
poor at recognizing patterns. The classic 
problem was trying to get a machine to 
ate between the lener B and 
the letter D. A child could do it; it was 
almost impossible for a c to look 
at the two pattems and discern the 


ce. 
Tl give you a graphic displ 
hard said. He punched button 
the screen. After а moment, crosshaich- 
ing for a graph appeared and the ро 
began to blink on: 


Ger- 
wiping 


ts 


STIMULATION| ELAPSED | NUMBER OF 
STIMULATIONS 


PER HOUR 


STIMULATIONS PER HOUR. 


3 xb n jpg 
o'clock 


“Damn,” she said, when she saw the 
graph. 

“What's the matter?" Gerhard said. 
"He's getting more frequent stimul 
tions. He had none for a long time, and 
then he began to have them every few 

hours. Now it looks like one an hour.” 

So?" Gerhard said 

sugges 
lt should suggest someth 


"What does that 


quite 


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PLAYBOY 


232 


specific." she said. "We know that Ben- 
will be interacting with the 
computer, right? And that interaction 
will be a learning pattern of some kind. 
It's just like a kid with a cookie jar. If 
you slap the kid's hand every time he 
reaches for the cookies, pretty soon he 
won't reach so often. Look." She dre 
quick sketch. 


son's bra 


"Now," she siid, “that’s negative rein- 
forcement. The kid reaches, but he gets 
hurt, So he stops rechin инану, 
he'll quic altogether. OF 
id, "but 

“Let me finish. IE the kid is no 
works that way. But if the 
masochist, it will be very different.” She 
drew another curve. 


is a 


[2] 


дә چ‎ 


“нете, the kid is reaching тоге often 
for the cookies beciuse he likes getting 
hit. It should be negative reinforcement, 
but it's really positive reinforcement. Do 
you remember Ceci 
On the computer console, a ne 
port appeared: 11:22 STIMULATION EEG. 
“Oh, shit,” she said. “It’s happening.” 
“Whats happening? I don't under- 
stand," Gerhard said. 
“Benson is going inte 
sion cycle. les just like Cecil 
the first monkey to be wired to a com- 
puter with electrodes. That was back in 
sistyfive. The computer wasnt mi 
turized then; it was a big clunky co 
puter and the monkey was wired up with 
actual wives. OK. Cecil had epilepsy. 


te- 


positive progres- 
Cecil was 


“Come again.” 


puter detected the sta 
d delivered 
OK. Now 


counter 
seizures should 


stop it 
have come less and less frequently, lil 


the hand reaching for the cookies less 
and less often. But, instead, the reverse 
happened. Cecil liked the shocks, And 
gan to initiate seizures in order to 
rience the pleasurable shocks." 

1 shook his head. "Listen, ] 


thats all interesting. But a person. can't 


t and stop cp He 
"t control it, The se = 
avoluntary,” she s: ght 


You have no more control over them 
than you do over heart rate and blood 
pressure and sweating and all the other 
involuntary acis.” 

There was a long pause. Gerhard s 
“You're going to tell me I'm wrong.” 

On the screen, the computer blinked: 
ТЕ 


Im go 
"that you've cut too many conferences. 
1onomic learning? 


s to tell you," she s 


You know 
“No.” 
“It was a big mystery for a long time 

Classically, it was believed that you 

could learn to control only voluntary 

acts You could learn to drive а car, but 
you couldn't learn to lower your blood 
pressure. Of course, there were those 
yogis who supposedly could reduce oxy- 
gen requirements of their bodies and slow 
their heartbeats to h. They 
could reverse intestinal peristalsis and 
drink liquids through the But 
that was all unproved—and theoretically 
impossible 

d nodded cautiously. 

t tums out to be perfectly 
possible. You cin teach a rat to blush in 
only one ear. Right car or left car, take 
your pick. You can teach it to lower or 

ise its blood pressure or heartbeat, And 


bow 


nus, 


you can do the same thi 
It’s not impossible. It can be done.” 
“How?” 
“Well, with people who have high 
blood pressure, f 


with people. 


instance, all you do 
is put them in а room with а blood-pres- 
sure cull on their arm. Whenever the 
blood pressure goes down, a bell rings 
You tell them to try to make the bell 
ring as often as possible, They work 
for that reward—a bell ringing. At first 
it happens by acd Then pretty 
soon they learn. how to make it happen 
more often. The bell rings more frequent- 
ly. After а few hours, it's ringing a lot" 

зенага scratched his head. “And you 
think Benson is producing morc sci- 
тигез, to be rewarded with shocks? Well, 
what's the difference? He still ¢ 
es. The computer always pre 


t have 


y seizu 


"A couple of 
n schizophrenic 


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233 


PLAYBOY 


234 


nd allowed to stimulate a 
pl terminal as often as he wanted. 
He pushed himself into a convulsion by 
overstimulating himself.” 

Richards, who had been watching the 
computer console, suddenly said, "Some- 
thing's wrong. We're not getting readings 
anymore. 

On 
nar 

Ross looked 


was wired up 


pened. started for the door. 
“м n get а com- 
puter extrapol See il 


he's really going i 
and how fast. 


FRIDAY, MARCH 


I 


The seventh (special surgic: 
was quiet; there were two nurses at the 
n. One was making progress notes 
on a patient's chart; the other was cat- 
ing а candy bar and reading а movie 
magazine, Neither paid much attention 
to Ross as she went to the chart shelf, 
opened Benson's record and checked it. 

She wanted t0 be certain that. Benson 
had received all his medications: and. to 
her astonishment, she found that he had 
not, "Why hasn't Benson gotten his 
Thorazine?" she demanded. 

The nurses looked up in surprise. 
Benson. 
“The patient in 
ced at her watch: it wa 


E 


sevenicn," Rass 
after mid- 
"He was supposed to be started on 
noon. Twelve hours ago. 
1" One of the 
nurses reached for the chart. Ross hand- 
ed it to her and watched while she 
turned to the page of nursing orders. 

ine was 
creed in red by a nurse, with the 
a yptic notation 

Ross was thinking that without heavy 
doses of "Thorazine, s psychotic 
mentation would be unchecked and could 
be dangerous. 

“Oh. the nurse said. “I remem 
ber now. Dr. Morris told us that only 
medication orders from him or from Dr. 
Ros were to be followed. We don't 
know this Dr. McPhee, so we waited to 
call him ıo confirm the therapy. I 
Ross said he 


Bensoi 


The nurse fro 
“Well, how 
thai? You can't read the name. Here. 
She handed back the chart. “We 
thought it looked like McPhee, and the 
only McPhee in the hospital directory is 
а gynecologist 1 didn't seem log 
cil, but sometimes doctors will рш a 
note on the wrong chart by accident. so 


ned at the signature. 
e we supposed to know 


, waving her 


hand. “All right. Ju 
azine now, will yo 

"Right away, doctor," the nurse said. 
She gave her a dirty look and went to 
the medicine locker. Ross went down 
the hall to room 710. 

The cop sat outside Benson's room with 
his chair tipped back against the wall. 
He was reading Secret. Romances with 
more interest tham Janet would have 
thought likely. He looked up as she came 
down the hall. "Good evening, doctor. 

"Good evening. Everything quiet? 

"Pretty quiet.” 

Inside 710 she could he: 


t get him his Thor- 


television, a 
Ik show with laughter. Someone said, 
“And what did you do then?” There 
was more laughter. She opened the door. 

The room lights were off; the only 
light came from the glow of the tele- 


vision, Benson had apparently fallen 
asleep; his body was turned away from 
the door and the sheet was pulled up 


over his shoulder. She clicked the televi- 
sion off and crossed the room to the bed. 


Try," she said softly. 
She stopped. 


Harry 


The leg hei h her hand was soft 
and formless. She pressed down: the leg 
bulged oddly. She reached for the bed- 


le lamp and turned it on. flooding the 
room with light. Then she pulled back 
the sheet. 

Benson was gone. In his place were 
m ic bags ol the kind the hospi 
skets. Each had 
ed and then knoucd tightly 
as represented. by 
m by another. 
Officer," she said in a low 
you'd better get your ass in here. 

The cop came bounding into the 
room, his hand reaching for his gun. 
Ross frowned and gestured to the bed. 

Holy shi" Ше cop said. "Wh 
happene 

“I was going to ask you 

The cop didn’t reply. Не w 
diately то the bathroom and checked 
there; it was empty. He looked in the 
closets. “His clothes are still here, but 
his shoes are gone" he said. He turned 
ıd looked at Ross with a kind of despera- 
tion. "Where is he 

“When was the 
inro this room? 
the bedside buzzer to 
nurse. 

“About twenty minutes ago.” 

Ross walked to the window 
looked out. The w 
it was a sheer drop of seven stories 10 
the parking lot below. “How long were 
you away from the door?" 

"Look, doc, it was only a few minutes 
—1 тап out of cig The hospital 
doesn't have any machines. 1 had to go 
to that coffee shop across the street. 1 
was gone about three minutes. That was 


voice, 


imme- 


t time vou looked 
Ross asked. She pressed 
call the n 


and 
"dow was open, but 


rette: 


«| cleven-thirty. The nurses said 
they'd keep an eye on things. 

"Great," Ross said. She checked the 
bedside table and siw that Benson's 
shaving equipment was there, his wallet, 
his car keys. . . all there. 
arse stuck her head in the door, 
ng the сай. “W А 
"We seem to be missing а patient.” 
id. She gestured to the plastic 
n the bed. The nurse reacted slow- 
ly, and then turned quite pale. 

"Call Dr. Ellis,” Ross said, "and Dr. 


McPherson and Dr. Morris. They'll be 
home; have the switchboard. put. you 
throw y it's an emergency. Tell 


them Benson is gone. Th 
security. Is that dea? 
Yes, doctor.” the nurse said and hur- 
ried away. 

Row sat down on the edge of Ben- 
son's bed and turned her attention to 
the cop. "Clever," the cop said, "but he 
сапт get far. А man with bandages and a 
bathrobe can't get far, even if he has 
shoes.” He shook his head. "I better call 
th 


Did Benson make апу calls?" 
He made one.” the cop 
eleven." 

“Did vou listen to й 
No." He shrugged. “I never thought. 
His voice trailed off. "You know." 
"So he made one call at eleven and 
left at eleven-thirty.". Ross walked. from 
the bed outside into the hallway. She 
looked down the hall at the nurses 
j. There was always somebod 
nd Benson would have to pass 
the nurses’ statio h the elevator. 

ver make it. 

What else could he have done? She 
looked toward the other end of the hall. 
There was a stairway at the far end. He 
could have walked down. But seven 
flights of stairs? Benson was too weak 
for that. And when he got 10 the 
ground-floor lobby, there he'd be, in his 
bathrobe. with hi gel. The 


bout 


юн 


. com 
"Where could he g 
” Ross said. 
they all tended to 
To the cops, Benson w: 
nal charged with assiult, one 
hu 


t get 


the 


of 
dreds of querulous types they saw 


о the hosp 
sed man, unhappy 


forget that Benson w: 
His computer work w 
a field where many 
worked. In the in 
ing at the NPS, he had scored 111 on his 
abbreviated WAIS L Q. test. He was ful 
ly capable of planning to leave, then 
listening at the door, hearing the cop 
and the nurse discuss going for ci 
rettes—a 


"Imagine! Me sitting here with one of the pioneers 
of the motion-picture industry." 


PLAYBOY 


236 


* "Throw out the life line! Throw out the life line! 
Someone is drifting away. Throw out the life line! Throw 


out the life line! Someone is sinking today. . . . 


a matter of minutes, But how? 

Benson must have known that he 
could never get our of the hospital in 
his bithrobe. He had left 
clothes in room—he prol 
couldn't get out wearing those. eith 
Vot at 11:30. The lobby desk would 1 
stopped him. Visiting hours had ended 
two and one half hours before. 

The cop went down the hall to the 
station to phone in a report. Ross 
followed along behind him, looking at the 
doors. Room 709 had a burns patient; she 


his 


street 


plant patient had been discharged. that 
afternoon. She checked that room, too. 
The next door was marked SUPPLIES. 
She entered what w 1 тоот 
on surgical floors. В; „ suture kits 
ad linn supp! stored. there. 
She passed row after row of bottled 
intravenous solutions, then trays of dif 
ts. Then masks, smocks, 
uniforms for nurses and orderli 


ferent 


spare 


She stopped. She was staring at a blue 
andavhitestiped bathrobe, hastily wad- 
ded into a corner of a shelf. The rest of 
the shelf comtained white trousers, sh 
and jackets. wor 
She called the nurse. 


by hospital order 


“It's impossible,” Ellis said, pacing up 
and down in the nursing station. “Abso 
Iutely impossible, He's wo days—one 
day—postop. He couldn't possibly leave." 

“He did,” Janet Ross said. "And he 
did it the only way he could, by chang 
ing into an orderly’s uniform. Then he 
probably walked downstairs to the sixth 
lioor and took an elevator to the lobby. 
Nobody would e noticed him; order 


lies come and go 
s wore a dinner jacket 
ly shirt; his bow tie wa 


la white 
loosened 


4 
s was smoking a cigarette. Row had 
“L will 
tanked 


never seen him smoke belor 
don't buy it,” he said. “He wa 
out of his skull with Thorazine, 


"Never got it,” Ross said. 


“What's Thoraz the cop said, 
g notes. 

The nurses had а question on the 

order and di ister it. He had 


no sedatives and n zers since 
midnight last night. 
Christ." Ellis said. He looked at the 
nurses as if he could kill them. Then he 
рг about his head? It 
was covered with bandages. Someone 
would notice that. 

Morris, who had been sitting silenil 
, "He had а wig. 1 saw it” 

“What was the color of the wig 
question?” the cop asked. 

“Black.” Morris said. 

Ros said, "How did he get this 


aqui 


a corner, за 


wig?" 

А friend brought it to him. The day 
of admission." 

"Listen," Ellis said, “even with a wig. 
he can't have gotten anywhere. He left 


is wallet and his mone; 


xis at th 


There are no 


hour 
Ross looked at Ellis, marveling at his 
ability to deny reality. He just didn’t 
want to believe that Benson had lelt; he 
was fighting the evidence, fighting hard. 
“He called a friend," Ross 
"about eleven." She looked at Morris. 
“You remember who brought the wig? 
7A pretty girl," Morris said. 
“Do you remember her name?” Ross 
1 with a sarcastic edge. 


said, 


orris said promptly. 
1 the phone 
hook,” Ross began 10 chee 
the phone rang and Ellis answered it. He 
listened, then handed the phone to Ross. 

‘I've done the computer projection,” 
Gerhard s. 
hit. Benson is on a learning cyde 
with his implanted computer. His stimu- 
lation points conform to the projected 
curve. 10У ехасйу what you said; Ben- 
son apparently likes the shocks. He's start 
The 


ing seizures more and more often 
curve is going up sharply.” 

“When will he tip over?’ 
Not long,” Gerhard. said. “Assuming 
that he doesn’t break the cycle—and I 
doubt that he will—then he'll be getting 
almost continuous stimulations at. sis-oh- 
four AM 

“You have a confirmed projection оп 
she asked, frowning. She glanced 
ly 12:30. 


t's righi 

"OK," Ros 1 hung up. She 
looked at the others. “Benson has gone 
imo g progression h his 
computer. He's projected for tip-over at 
six A.M. today." 

“Chri Mis said, looking at the 
wall clock. “Barely six hours from now." 


Across the room, Morris had put aside 
the phone book and was talki » 
information. “Then try West Los A 


les" he id. after 
about new listing: 


pause 


The cop stopped taking notes and 
looked confused. Is something going to 
happen at six o'clock?" 

"We think so,” Ross said 

Ellis pulled on his cigueue. “Two 
he said, "and I'm back on them.” 
He stubbed it out carefully. “Has Mc- 
Pherson been notifice 

"He's been called." 

“Check unlisted numbers," Morris said 
He listened for a moment. "This is Dr. 
Morris at University Hospital,” he said, 
"and it's am emergency. We have to lo- 
cate Angela Black, Now, Ii" Angrily, 
he slammed down the phone. “Bitch,” he 
said. Then he shook his head and add 
ed, "No luck." 

"We don't even know," 
Benson called this 
called someone else.” 

“Whoever he called may be in а lor of 
trouble in a few hours,” Ross said. She 
flipped open Benson's chart. "It looks 
like а long night. We'd better get busy.” 


Г 
rl. Не could have 


Ellis said. 


n 


The freeway was crowded. The frec 
way was always crowded, even at one 
o'clock on a Friday morning. Janet Ross 
stared ahead at the dense pattern of red 
ws, stretching ahead for miles like 
snake. So many people. Where 
going at this hour? 


Usually, she took pleasure in the free- 
ways. There had been times when she 
had driven home from the hospital at 
t. with the big green signs flashing 
past overhead, and the intricate web of 
ad the ex- 
hilarating anonymous speed, and she had 
felt wonderful, expansive, free. She had 
been raised in California and she remem- 
bered the first of the freeways, The system 
had grown as she had grown, and she 
did not sce it as a menace nor an evil. It 
was part of the landscape: it was fast; it 
was fun 

Later she had begun to recognize the 
subtle psychological effects of living your 
life inside an automobile. Los 
had no sidewalk cafés, because no onc 
walked: 
could stare at passing people, was not 


overpasses and underpasses, 


the sidewalk calé, where you 


stationary but mobile. It changed with 
cach traffic light, where people stopped. 
stared briefly at one another. then drove 
on. But there was something inhuman 
about living inside a cocoon of tinted 
glass and st 
carpeted, stercophonic tape-decked, power- 
optioned, isolated, It thwarted some deep 
human need to congregate, to be together, 
ıd be seen. 


nless steel, air conditioned, 


10 scc i 


tists recognized an indig- 
syndrome, Los 
recent. immi 


Local psych 
enous depersonalization 


Angeles was а town of 


grants, and therefore strangers; cars kept 
them strangers and there were few insti- 
tutions that served to bring them togeth- 
ег. No one went to church and work 
groups were not entirely 
People became lonely, they complained 
of being cut off, without friends, far 
from and Many 
times they became suicidal—and а com- 
mon method of suicide was the automo- 
hile. You picked your overpass and hit it 
at 80 or 90, foot flat to the floor. Some- 
times it took hours to cut the body out 
of the wreckage 

Moving at 65 miles an hour, Ross 
shifted across five lanes of traffic and 
pulled off the freeway at Sunset, heading 
up into the Hollywood Hills, through 
known locally as the Swish Alps. 
because of the ma 
lived there problems 
seemed drawn to Los Angeles. It offered 
freedom; the price was lack of supports. 

She came to Laurel Canyon and took 
the curves fast, tires squealing. head 
lamps swinging through the darkness 
‘There was little traffic here: she would 
reach Benson's house in a few minutes. 

In theory, she and the rest of the NPS 
saff had a simple problem: Get Benson 
back before six o'clock. И they could get 


satisfactory. 


families old homes 


an аге: 


y homosexuals who 


People with 


him back into the hospital, they could 
uncouple his implanted computer and 


фр2г\!. 


OUR SECRET PRICE IS 


$11 X64 2... EXCEPT AFEW 


ion, Brown Shoe Company, St. Louis. 


TEETH MER DON'T 
GRAIN LEATHER 


PLAYBOY 


238 


stop the progression series. Then they 
could sedate him and wait a few days 
before relinking him to a new set of 
terminals. They'd obviously chosen the 
wrong clectrodes the first time around; 
a risk they had accepted in 
advance. Jt was an acceptable risk be- 
cause they had expected to have a 
chance to correct any error. But that 
opportunity was no longer there 

They had to get him back. After re- 
viewing his chart, they'd all set ош for 
dilferent places. Ross was going to his 
house on Laurel. Ellis going to a 
suip joint called the Jackrabbit Club, 
where Benson often went, Morris was 
going to Autotronics, Inc., Benson's em- 
ployer in Santa Monica; he'd called the 
president of the firm, who was going to 
the offices to open them up for him. 

"They would all check back in an hour 
ог so, to compare notes and progress. А 
simple plan and one Ross thought un- 
likely to work. But there wasn't much 
else to do. 


y 4 a ; 


"АЯ 


"Uh, I thin 


She parked her car in front of Ben- 
son's house and walked up the slate 
path to the front door. It was ajar; from 
inside, she could hear the sound of 
laughter and giggles. She knocked and 
pushed it open. “Hello? 

No one seemed to hear. The giggles 
came from somewhere in the back of the 
house. She stepped into the front hall- 
way. She had never seen Benson's house 
and she wondered what it like. 
Looking around, she realized she should 
have known. 

From the outside, it w 
wood-frame structure, а ranch-style house 
as unobtrusive in ppearance as Ben- 
son himself. But the inside looked like 
the drawing rooms of Louis XVI—grace- 
ful antique chairs and couches, tapestries 
оп the walls, bare hardwood floors. It was 
a complete re-creation of an earlier day. 
Anybody ho she called. Her 
voice echoed through the house. There 
was no answer, but the laughter contin- 
ued. She followed the sound toward the 


an ordinary 


you'd better turn on 
the car radio, Martha. . . > 


rear of the house. She went into the 
kitchen—antique gas stove, no oven, no 
dishwasher, no electric blender, no toast- 
er. No machines, she thought. Benson 
had built himself a world without any 
sort of modern machine in it. 

The kitchen window looked out onto 
the back yard. There was a small patch 
of lawn and a swimming pool, all. per- 
fcctly ordinary and modern. Benson's or- 
ry exterior again. The back yard was 
bathed in greenish light from the under- 
lus. In the pool, two girls were 
ing and splashing. Ross went out- 


s were oblivious to her arriv 
al They continued to splash and shriek 
happily; they wrestled with each other 
in the water, She stood on the pool deck 
and said, "Anybody home?" 

They noticed her then and moved 
apart from cach other. “Looking for 
Harry?" onc of them asked. "Arc you а 
cop? 

“Im a doctor 

One of the gi 


s got out of the pool 
lithely and began toweling off. She wore 
a red bikini. "You just missed him," 
the girl said. “But we weren't supposed 
to tell the cops. That's what he said. 
She put one foot on a chair to dry her 
leg with the towel. Ross realized the move 
was calculated, seductive and demon 
tive, The 
convinced, 

"When did he leave: 

“Just a few 

“How long have you been here?” 

“About a w the girl i 
“Harry invited us to 
thought we we 

The other girl wi 
around her shoulders. “We met him at 
the Jackrabbit. He goes there often, He's 
а Jot of fun,” she said. “A Jot of laughs. 
You know what he was wearing tonight? 
А hospital u All white.” She 
shook her head. "What a riot.” 

"Did you t im? What did hc 
зау? 


1 
girls liked girls, she was now 


Ross asked. 
nutes ago." 


apped the towel 


The girl in bikini started 
inside. Ross followed her. “He said not 
to tell the cops. He said to have a good 


Why did he come here?" 
“He had to pick up some stuff. from 
his study. 


“Where is the study?” 
She led Ross into the house and 
through the living room. Her wet fect left 


small pools on the bare floor. 
place wild? Harry's really cr: 
old stult.” 

"He's sick," Ross said, 
to sce him.” 

“He must be," the girl said. “L saw 
those bandages, What was he, in an 
accident?” 

“He h 


Isn't this 


. All this 


and I've got 


4 an operation 
Чо kidding. In a hospital?" 


“They went down a corridor to bed- 
rooms. The girl turned right into onc 
room, which was a study—antique desk, 
aps. overstuffed couches. "He 
ind got some stuff. 
“Did you see what he got 
“We didn't really pay any attention. 
But he took some big rolls of pape 
She gestured with her hands. “Real big. 
“They looked like blueprints or something. 
"They were blue on the inside of the roll 
and white on the outside and they were 
big." She shrugged. 


antique 
c 


“Did he take anything ebe” Ross 
asked. 
“Yeah, A metal box. It looked like a 


tool kit, maybe, I saw it open for a 
moment, before he closed it. It seemed 
to have tools and sul inside.” 

Did you notice anything in particu- 


The girl was silent then, She bit her 
lip. "Well, I didn't really see, but"—she 
paused —"it looked like а gun 

“Did he say where he was g 
when he was coming bac 

Well, that was funny,” the girl said. 
“He kissed me, and he kissed Suzie, and 
he said to have a good time, 
not to tell the cops. And he 
didn't think he'd be seeing us again. 
She shook her head. “It was funny. But 


you know how Hany is" wo 
“Yes.” Ros sid. “I know how Harry °РМАМ 
is" She looked at her watch. It was 1:47. 
"Ehere were only four hours left. “Like father like son. huh. Ralph?” 
ш 
The first thing that Ellis noticed was 


the smell: hot, damp, fetid—a dark “Have you seen him lately?” Ellis unhooking her bra. She did a sort of 
warm animal anell. Бе wrinkled) hig asked. twostcp shuffle, hands behind her back 
Wow in distaste. How could Benson tol “T don't know about lately," the man сусу looking vacantly out at the aud 
peas answered. He coughed. Ellis smelled sweet ence. Ellis. understood, watching her, 
He watched as the spotlight swung tlcoholic breath. "But I tell you. I wish he ht of strippers as ma- 
did wouldn't hang around, you know? I think es. They were mechanical, no ques 
he's a Title nurs, And always bothering tion about it. And artificial—when the 
the girls. You know how hard it is to bra came off. he could sce the U-shaped 
keep the girl? Fucking murder, that's surgical incisions beneath cach breast. 
what it is. where the plastic had been inserted. 
llis nodded and scanned the audience. — Jaglon would love this, he thought. Ti 
Benson had probably changed dothe would fit right in with his theories 
тайпы иан lad beer longtime ^ d caring machine sex. Jaulon was one of the 
Amo. Tt was а shock to think how fist the Uniform anymore, Ellis looked at the Developmen boys and һе 
8 between pied with the idea of 


Gi du аа backs of the heads, at the a 
hairline and shirt collar. He looked for gence merging with huma 
а white bandage. He saw попе. He argued that on the one hand, cos 
“When did you see him I; metic surgery and implanted. machinery 
The man shook his head, “Not for а were making man more mechanical, 
week or so." А waitress went by, weari 
а vabbilike whitefur bi 
Harry man. И was only a n 
He's usually around.” she said vaguely people 1 
and wandered off with a tray of drinks. sates 
“I wish he wouldn't hang around, Perhaps it's already happening, Ellis 
mind bothering the girls,” the manager said and thought, s 
is looked at the audience. There coughed again, sweetly. looked 
were many men there—and a lot of very Ellis moved deeper into the club. The himself that Benson. 
tough-looking girls with short ha spotlight swung through smoky 
"Harry Benson?" the manager said at his head, following the movements of the b 
his elbow. “Yeah, he comes in a lot.” І onstage ic was һа trouble 


wh the darkness and came to rest 
on а pair of long ta thighs. The 
was an expectant rustling in mhe audi 
ence. I reminded Ellis of his days in the 
Navy, stationed in Baltimore. That was 
the last time he had been in a place like 
this, hor and sticky with fantasies and 


erin, 


bout 


n ога 


1у he wouldn't be we 


was preoccu- 
wtificial intelli- 
n intelligence. 


"Yes. Indies amd gentlemen, the in- 
credible, the lovely, Cyn-thia Siu«cere. A 
big hand for the lovely Cynthia?" 

The spotlight widened onstage, to 
show a rather ugly but spectacularly 


$ while on the other hand. robot develop- 
al, you ments were 


machines more hu 


constructed girl. The band began to play. 
When the spotlight was wide enough to 
hit Cynthia’s eyes, she squinted and be 
gan an awkward dance. She paid no atten 
tion to the music, but no one seemed to 


ter ol time before 
h humanoid 


not Ше 
over Then he checked a phone booth in the 
k and the men’s room. 

The men's room was small and res 


239 


PLAYBOY 


240 


of vomit. He winced again and stared at 
himself in the cracked. mirror over the 
washbasin, Whatever else was true about 


the Jackrabbit Club, it 
тогу assault, He wondered if 
tered to Benson. 
Once outside, he breathed the cool 
ht air and got imo his car. The 
n of smells intrigued him. It was a 
problem he had considered before but 
never really resolved in his own mind. 
Because his operation on Benson had 
been directed toward a specific part of the 
brain, the limbic system. It was a very 
old part of the brain, in terms of evolu- 


produced 


tion. Its original purpose had been the 
control of smell. In. fact, the old term 
for it was rhinencephalon—the "smell. 
ing brain.” 


It had developed 150.000.000 y 
ago, when reptiles ruled the earth, It 
controlled. the most. primitive behavior— 
lust and hun 


s 


behavior. 
1 а cerebral 


Man, on the other hand, 
cori 

But the cerebral cortex was a recent 
addition. It was only about. 100.000 years 
old: its modern. development began only 
bout 2,000,000. ars o. The 
around the limbic 
which ned embedded deep 
the cortex. That cortex, 
could feel love, and worr 


cortex 


br: 


rem 
new 


which 
bout ethical 
conduct, and write poetry, had to make 


an unca e with the crocodile brain 
t its core. Sometimes, as in the case of 
Benson, the peace broke down and the 


crocodile brain took over intermittently. 
What was the relationship of smell to 
all this? Ellis was not sure: Of course, 
ks often began with the sensati 


He didn't know and, as he drove, he 
rellected that it didn't much matter. 
The only problem was to find. Benson 
before his crocodile bra took over. 
That had happened once with Benson, 
in the NPS. Ellis had been watching 
the onewa 
© norma 
t the w 
picking up his chair, smashing 
эм the wall. The attack had beg 
without warning and it had been cam 
out with utter, unthinking viciousness. 


throug! 


glass. Benson had 


bec 


" 


lashed out 
ly, 


Six AM, he 
much ti 
1v 
“ls eue that Harry has gotten 
Farley said. “Ir seemed. to be 


during Watershed Week—h 


was 


п July 1969. You probably never he: 
of it.” Farley, a tall, slender man with a 
slow manner, was the president of Auto- 


опу. He'd responded to Morris" ете 


gency phone call and they had met at 
the offices. They had gone back into the 
cavernous room occupied chiefly by seir- 
tered desks and several pieces of enor- 
mous, glittering machinery. Farley had 
indicated Benson's desk and Morris had 
just searched it, finding nothing mor 
than pape ils, a slide rule, scrib- 
bled notes some business letters. 
Now Farley had heated up some instant 
coffee and they were each having а cup. 

“What was Watershed Week?” Morris 
asked. 

"That's just what we named ir" Far- 
ley said. “Everybody in our business— 
computer scientists all over the world— 
knew it was coming and watched for it. 
In that week, the information-handling 
capacity of the world’s computers ex- 
ceeded the 
ty of all the human bi 
Computers could receive and store more 
data than three half bi 
brains.” 

Morris sipped his сой 
tongue. “Is that a јок 

"Hell, no." Farley said. “It's true. The 
watershed was passed in 1969 and com- 
puters have been steadily pulling ahead 
since then, By 1975, they'll lead human 
beings by fifty to one in terms of cap: 
йу” He paused. “Hary was 
And that was w 
ın for him. He got v 
secretive. 

Mor 


information-handli 


g capac 


ins in the world. 


and a 


burned 


sensation: the first time he could recall 
being in а room littered with computers 
He realized that he had made some 
mistakes about Benson, He had assumed 
that Benson was pretty much like every- 
one clse—but no one who worked in 

place such as this was like everyone else. 
"You know how fast this is mov 
ley said. “Damned fast. We've gone 
from milliseconds to nanoseconds in just 


years. When the computer Mia 
was built in it could do eleven 
thousand ions a sec- 
ond. Pretty ight? Well, the 
almost finished with Iliac IV now. 


will do two hundred. million operations 
second. les the fourth genera 
course, it couldn't have be 
out the help of other computers. They 
used two other computers full time for 
two yeas designing the new Iliac.” 
is drank his coffee, Perhaps it 
was his fatigue, perhaps the spookiness 
of the room, bur he was beginning to 
feel Benson, 
yhe they 


some kinship wi Com- 


"No," Monis t down in the 
r behind the desk and looked around. 


cli 


He was пу 
Benson, to t 


ag to be Benson, to act like 
ink like Bense How did 


he spend his t 
“I don't know,” Farley said, sitting on 
another desk across the room. le got 


pretty distant and withdrawn the past 
few months. 1 know he had some trou- 
ble with the law, And | knew he was 
going into the hospital. 1 knew that. He 
didn’t like your hospital much. 
° Morris asked. not very 
Interested. It wasn't surprising that Ben- 
son was hostile to the hospital. 
у didn't answer. Inste, 
over to a bulletin board, where clippings 
and photos had been tacked up. He те 
moved one vellowing news em and 
gave it to Mor 
It was from the Los Angeles Times. 
dated July 17, 1969. The headline read: 
“UNIVERSITY HOSPITAL GETS NEW COM- 
отк” The story outlined the acquisi- 
tion of the IBM System 360 compute 
that was being installed in the hospital 
basement and would be used for research 
and assistance in operations, as well as a 
riety of other functions. 
"You notice the d 
shed Week," 


1, he went 


Farley said. 
a 


у 


They were all tired, but none of them 
could sleep. They Telecomp. 
aching the computer projections as 
ched up the plotted line toward а 
мше, The time was 5:30 aat., and 


ed ii 


pack of cigarettes, he lelt to get another. 
Morris stared at a journal in his lap but 
never turned the page: from time to 
time, he glanced up at the wall dock. 
Ross paced and looked at the su 
the sky nur pink the 
brown haze of smog to the cast. 
Ellis came back with his cigarettes. 
Ros became aware of the ticking of 
the wall clock. It was strange that she 
had never noticed it before, because, in 
fact. it ticked quite loudly. And once a 
minute, there was a mechanical dick as 
the hand another notch, The 
sound disturbed her. She begin to fix on 


over 


moved 


it, waiting for that single click on top of 
the quieter ticking. Mildly obsessive. she 
thought, And then she thought of all 
the other psychological derangements she 


i the рам. Déjà. vn, 
1 been somewhere 
the feeling 
herself from 
n at some social her- 
d delusions pho- 
There was no sharp line between 
nd disease, sanity and insanity 
s a spectrum and. everybody fitted 
те on it Wherever you were 
t spectrum, other people looked 
to you. Benson was strange to 


had experienced 
the feeling that she 1 
before: depersonalization 
that she watchin 
across the 


ма 


241 


PLAYBOY 


242 


them; without question, they were strange 
to Benson 


At six лм. they all stood and 
stretched, glancing up at the clock. Noth- 
i ppened. 

be it's ng at 
exactly,” Gerhard said. They waited. 


The dock showed 6:04. Still nothing 
happened. No telephones rang, no mes- 
sengers arrived. Nothing. 

Ellis slipped the cellophane wrapper 
off his cigarettes and crumpled it. The 
sound made Ross want to scream. He 
began to play with the cellophane, 
crumplii smoothing it out, crumpling 
i in. She gritted her teeth. 

The clock showed 6:10, then 6:15. 
McPherson came the room. “So far, 
so good, smiled bleakly and 
red at onc another. 
“ts 
don't know,” Gerhard said, staring. 
at the computer console. "Maybe the 


projection was wrong, after all. We had 
only three plowing points. Maybe we 
should run another curve through. 

He sat down the console and 
punched buttons The scrcen glowed 
with alternative curves, streaking white 
across the green background. Finally he 
stopped, "No," he said. “The computer 
sticks with the original curve.” 

obviously the computer is 
Morris It’s almost six- 
- The cafeteria will be opening, 
Anybody want to have breakfast?” 

"Sounds good to me s said. He 
got out of his chair, “J 

She shook her head, “I'll wait here 
awhile." 

“I don't think it’s going to hap- 
pen." Morris said. "You better get some 
breakfast 

“LU wait here.” The words came out 
almost before she re: 

"OK, OK.” Mi 


ized it. 
s said, raising his 


“I know I shall probably chastise 
myself severely in later years, but if you don't 
mind, ГИ take the quarter instead.” 


hands. He shot a glance at Ellis and the 
two of them left. Ross remained in the 
room with Gerhard. 

“Do you have confidence limits on 
that curve?” she said. 

“I did," Gerhard said. "But I don't 
know anymore. We've passed the co 
dence limits already. They were about 


plus or minus two minutes for ninety- 
nine percent. 
“You mean the seizure would have 


occurred between six-oh-two and six-oh- 


ugged. “But it 


“Yeah, roughly." He sl 
obviously didn't happen 

“It might take time before it 
discovered.” 

“It might," Gerhard 
didn't seem convinced. 

She retumed to the window. The sui 
was up now, shining with a pale. reddish 
light. Why did sunrises always scem 
less brilliant. than sunsets? 
il her, she heard a single clec- 


w 


nodded. He 


rd said. She turned. He 
pointed across the room to a small me- 
chanical box on a shelf in the corner. 
The box was attached to а telephone. A 
» light glowed on the box. 

What is it?" she asked. 

“That's the special 
"The twenty-fo 
dog tag." 

She went over and picked 
telephone from its cradle 
їй a measured, resonant voice 
Should be advised that the body 
must not be cremated or d, а in 
у until the implanted atomic ma- 
has been removed. Failure to re- 
the material presents a 
mination. For 


the 
She listened 


up 


move 
radioactive con 


infor 
She turned 10 Gerhard. “How do you 
turn it off?" 
He pressed а button on the box, The 
recording stoppe 
"Hello?" she said. 
There was a pause. Then a n 


Get à pencil a 
fo take an address dow: 
tain Anders of the Los An 

She gestured to Geri 
thing to write with. “What's the prob- 


paper. T w: 
. This 


lem, Captain?” 
“We have a murder here," Anders 
said, "and we've got some questions for 


your people.” 


This is the second of three installments 
of а condensed version of “The Terminal 
Man.” The final installment of the novel 
will appear in the May issue, 


There are two cars 


built in Sweden. 


Thisisthe one with front 
wheel drive fora firmer grip 


on snow and ice. 


But front wheel driv 
the only thing that makes u: 
different from the other car built 
in Sweden. 

We have 
steering for qu 


When we built the first Sa 
built it with f 
Swedish winters. 

rom that one to today’s 
Saab 99E, we've seen no reason 
to change. 


and pinion 
er response. 


Because, with the weight of Impact-absorbing bumpe 
the engine over the drive wheels, that reduce your collision insu ce 
you get a better grip on snow. rates 15% at Allstate: 


And “roll саре” construction, 
the kind that soon, by law, may be 
required on all cars. 

As standard equipment, we 
and 4-wheel 


And with the engine p 


ar wheel drive car, 

wheels have a tendency to 
keep going 
front wheel: 


disc brakes. 
And while we were making 
the Saab 99E a good-handling and 


safe winter car, we also made it a 
comfortable winter c: 
With things like separate 
heating controls for the back seat. 
And the world's only electrically- 
heated driver's seat to keep yoi 
ntil the rest of the car 


the best way to tell the 
ce between the two cars 


built in Sweden is to drive both. 
Once you've done that, we think 
you'll want to keep driving the 


Saab 99E. 


SAAB 99E 


Before you buy theirs, drive ours. 


*Allstate discount available in most states. For the name and address of the dealer nearest you, call 800-243-6000. In Connecticut, call 1-800-882-6500. 


Y 


PLAYEO 


244 


Greatest Restaukant? (coninued ram page 116) 


on to a larger place in a busier town 
He found the present property, on the 
corner of the station square in the “big 
city" of Re where he could convert 
the entire ground floor into a bistro. They 
moved in 1930, From the first day, Je: 
Baptiste was determined to make his 
bistro the most popular in town. He had 
exactly the personality for the job, the 
manner and voice of a sly clown, the skill 
of a master storyteller, with the ability 
to retail the town gossip in terms so 
malicious and ribald that the stories were 
only a hairbreadth from slander, Soon the 
jammed from morning to 
h people playing the local 
tarots, rolling dice and listen- 
ptite, over endless cups 


bistro ма 


evening wi 


of collec and glasses ol pastis. 
Under papa J 

pers 

Jean 

т 


Baptiste’s firm 
sive guidance, it never occu 
па Pierre not to Decon 
apa warned that if they w 


sters of the art, they would have to 
spend at least te learning the 
classic techniques in the major restau- 
nants of Paris. In. 19H. Paris 
was liberated. Jean, at I8. headed for 
the big city. Pierre soon followed and 
papes parting advice was, "Stay with 
her and work together," They 
ethica the Pavillon d'Armenon 
‘Together 
at Dron- 


years 


your bre 


were tc 
ville in the Bois de Boulom 
at the Hótel. Crillon. Together 
amt. Together at the Restaurant. de 1а 
Pyramide in Vienne 

Finaliy. Jean became the fish chef 


а 


Pierre the sauce chef. at the foremost 
haute cuisine restaur ol Paris, Chez 
Lucas-Carton, wher kitchen was 


ruled with a rod ol iron by nificent 
disciplinarian known. to every chef in 
the city as Le Ре d. Today 
both brothers feel that the classical 
training they got trom him was the major 
force in their gastronomic education 

In 1951, when the ten years of ap- 
prenticeship were up, Jean-Baptiste sent 
c to his boys: “Maman is tired ol 
cooking. | give you my bistro. Come 
home and run it. Love, Papa." 

Tt arrived at the crucial moment. Jean 
said, "We were bored to death with the 
endless repetitions of the classic haute 
a waste of money and time 
e added. "Not only is haute cui- 
finished—its excesses disgust me. 
you have to spend chee days 
wdmill to deco- 
ke it, but then don't uy 
it up t it. Send it to a 
display it in ss case. 

In 1955, they were back home, toseth- 
er. Not long after, Jean met his wife 
Maria at the Roanne press ball. Pierre 
brought his girlfriend, Olympe, from 
Paris. "She was a w ress at onc of the 
restaurants wh worked," Pierre 
whispered slyly. 


cuisine 
Pic 
sine 


re wc 


beet. One day, the chel opened the door 
and siid, ‘Oh, excuse me,” and slammed 
the door at once. He was a good chel” 
The day after each girl was married, she 
moved imo the Troisgros house and 


became a waitress in the restaurant un- 
der ihe allsecing eye of popa Jean- 
Baptiste. 


“He was very hard.” said. Maria, “bat 
now we all realize that he was right. He 
taught us the discipline of the search for 


perfection. Now. I believe, that is the 
тургп of my life, It involves us all. 
Cather- 


iven our усло daughter, 
will rush to me and 
Maman. That gentleman 
alone in the comer. He seems to want 
something, 

Although the two. brothers were now 
classically trained. chefs. they never had 
the slightest intention of converting 


the bistro into а restumant, but very 


grad 


ly. Our philosophy was la cuisine 


simple, but prepared as we were 
trying to be a gr sstaurant,” 

After two уе in 1957. Michelin 
gave them one star. Then, in 1966, they 
moved up to two stus. Finally, on 
March 15, 1968, at crack of dawn, the 


copies of the new Michelin reached the 
bookstall of the railroad statio 
strolled across the street 
copy. There they were. Three stars. 

"Does it make a tremendous diffe 
ence?” I asked. 

Jean said, "Yes. In the tension of the. 
atmosphere. When we had two st 


people came, relaxed and siid to ш 
"Oh, la la! You are simply marvelous! 
You deserve sar! Now they 
come and say with their 


eyes. Me you really that good? Prove to 
us that you are worth the long journey 
we have made!" 

For the ıs involved 
fascinating experience. The Ty 
gros family invited me behind the scenes 
of their world of d gle toward 
excellence. The first morning, I was 
down at 6:30 with Olympe and Pi 
for l'ouverture, the opening up of the 
place before the ft arrives. At seven, 


ext few days, I w 


те, 


chef de cuisine, Michel (who is 
command to Jean and Pierre), 
two assistant cooks were in the 


kitchen beginning the mise en place. the 
putting in place of every ingredient and 
tool that would be needed for the day's 
cooking. By 7:15, two wai ye ready 
to serve the 30-odd town customers who 
come in on their way to work for a cajé 
an lait and a croissant. 

Meanwhile, Pieire concentrated 
the food supplies. This was not a market 
day, so he took me to his small 
for a Баш of long-distance (ерон 


ters wi 


on 


осе 
ng. 


the vill 
Swiss border. 
reported. tli 


There w call. [rom 
Modane on the 
wholesale agent ther 
fishing boats from Yvoire had been out 
the night before on the Lake of Geneva 
and had brought in а good catch of the 
only kind of blue пош the Troisgros 
will accept: about two pounds and 
slightly red inside the gills. They would 
be shipped live by  refiigeratcd truck. 
and reach Roanne ix hours. 
The next call was from Dublin. There 
good haul the night before 
in Galway Bay of the Dish mussels that 
the brothers think are the best in the 
world. They would be shipped live, in 
tanks, by boat to the Breton port of Ros- 
colf, and then by refrigerated track to 
Roanne. Another fishing company called 
ıt the mouth of the Loire 
to report what had been caught that 
morning in the way of crabs, langoustes, 
lobsters, scallops, shrimps. etc. An ama 


bout 


teur fisherman in Vichy called to say that 
he had hooked five e salmon in thc 
Allier River e day before. l to ask 


how n 
By ten o'clock. the kitchen staff was in 
full operation and Jean had come down- 
stairs to take charge. Ht had been raining 
ly that morning and three schoolboys 
appeared at the back door of the kitch- 
en carrying bags of live snails they had 
gathered in the woods. Jean inspected 
them, weighed them and paid off the 
boys fiom the iron cashbos. Two 
rived to report a noisy mob of frogs 
on the pond behind the flour mill. J 
showed them the traditional way of 
catching frogs without damaging them 
He brought ont a square of brightred 
bouclé silk. crumpled and rolled it imo а 
rough ball, attached it to a line about 
six feet long with a short, whippy rod. 
He said. “You drop the red ball onto 
the sw face of the pond. The red 
tes the frog, who attacks it and gets 
teeth stuck in it At that precise mo 
ment. you jerk up the ball w 


any he shonld bring aver 


rls 


frog as it f 
Precisely at 11. lunch was served to 
the май. At 11:30, the five Troi 


gi 
m rushed to 
м storm of the 


ged and every ш 
his post. ready for the 
day. About 60 businessmen came in with 
their clients and friends Almost unani: 
mously, they ate two courses and. spen 
about 53.50 per person. No menus were 
necessary. Maria knows the budget and 
te of every one of them. I hunched in 
back dining room with the business 
e what most of them were 
а extremely. popular Troisgros 
specialty, Creamed Marinated Chicken 
1 Wine Vineg: 
By about two o'clock, the first storm 


Introducing an old way 
to enjoy tobacco. 


If you're one of the millions who 
like to smoke, chances are you think 
that smoking is the only way to 
really enjoy tobacco. 

Well, we have news for you: 

There's more than one way to enjoy 
the pleasures of the tobacco leaf. 

As a matter of fact, people have 
been partaking of these pleasures in 
ways that have nothing to do with 
smoking for hundreds of years. 


Satisfying the aristocrats: 

Take the aristocracy in England. 

As far back as the 16th century, 
they considered it a mark of distinc- 
Чоп — as well as a source of great 
satisfaction—to use finely-cut, finely- 
ground tobacco with the quaint- 
sounding name of “snuff”. At first, 
this “snuff” was, as the name suggests, inhaled through 
the nose. 


Justa pinch: 

Later on, the vogue of sniffing gave way to an even 
more pleasurable form of using tobacco —placing just a 
pinch in the mouth between cheek and gum and letting 
it rest there. 

Now, hundreds of years later, this form of tobacco is 
having the biggest growth in popularity since the days 
of Napoleon 

And what we call “smokeless tobacco" is becoming a 
favorite way of enjoying tobacco 
with Americans from all walks of life. 
Anything but obvious: 

Why is "smokeless tobacco" be- 
coming so popular in America? 

There are a number of reasons. 

One of the obvious ones is that it 
is a way of enjoying tobacco that is 
anything but obvious. 

In other words, you can enjoy it 
any of the times or places where 
smoking is not permitted. 

Thus, lawyers and judges who 
cannot smoke in the courtroom, 
scientists who cannot smoke in the 


SEN 


laboratory, and many people who 
like to smoke on the job, but aren't 
allowed to, often become enthusias- 
tic users. 

In the same way, people who work 
or play with their hands get the com- 
fort of tobacco—but don't have to 
strike a match or worry about how 
to hold (or where to put) their ciga- 
rette, cigar, or pipe. 


The big four: 

The four best-known, best-liked 
brands of “smokeless tobacco" are 
“Copenhagen”, “Skoal” and the two 
flavors of "Happy Days". 

All four are made by the United 
States Tobacco Company, but. each 
has a distinctive flavor and person- 
ality. (To make sure that distinctive 
flavor is as fresh as it should be when you buy it, all 
cans are dated on the bottom.) 

Copenhagen, the biggest-selling brand in the world, 
has the rich flavor of pure tobacco. Skoal is wintergreen- 
flavored. And Happy Days comes in either raspberry or 
mint flavor —so it's especially popular with beginners. 

But if "smokeless tobacco" has many advantages for 
lovers of tobacco, we must also admit it has one 
disadvantage. 


How touse it: 

It takes a little more time and practice to learn ex- 
ow much to use (a “tiny 
he best way to describe it) 

xactly how to use it. 

To get over that minor problem, 
we'll be happy to send you a free 
booklet that explains how to get the 
full enjoyment of “smokeless to- 
few pinches that 
you can try for yourself. 

(Write to ‘Smokeless Tobacco”, 
United States Tobacco Company, 
Dept.P11, Greenwich, Connecticut 
06830.) 

Once you get the knack, you'll find 
you have something else, too: Another 
great way to enjoy tobacco. 


Smokeless Tobacco. A pinchisallit takes. 


245 


PLAYBOY 


was over. Jean and Pierre took me on a 
quick tour ol the outskirts of Roanne 10 
visit some of the amateur gardeners who 
grow fruits and vegetables to the Trois- 
gos specifications. Then we dropped in 
on their favorite boulanger, Claudius 
Dufour. Claudius bakes for Troisgros 26 
Kinds and shapes of breads and rolls and 
delivers them warm from his ovens five 
times а day. Next, we drove out to a 
green valley where we found, almost 
hidden among the trees, the 200-yearold 
Moulin de Sainte-Marie, The water in 
the tiny river was running fast, tu 
the mill wheel at a clanking clip. The 
owner, 60-year-old Pierre Debus, a classic 
French country type who might have 
stepped straight out of one of Daudee's 
Lettres de Mon Moulin, showed us the 
fistquality grade of Canadian durum 
wheat that he mills for Troisgros into 
а coarse, unbleached flour. 

At dinner that night. I ordered. from 
the least expensive, uinedollar menu. 
I began with a terrine of wild rabbit 
(served in small individual crocks) that 
Pierre had shot in the forest. There fol- 
lowed one of the supreme Troisgros spe- 
cialties, mussel soup—a rich fish. broth, 
with cream and saffron, 
glutinous. garnished with  wine-poached 
mu 
neys in a Musta 
sels, D drank a fine white bmg 
1966 Pouilly-Fuissé Cl i 
with the kidneys, a 1966 red Volna 
Santenors, which the Troisgros serves 
Burgundian муе in a polished pewter 
jug. After the almost unlimited choices 
from the cheese and dessert carts, Jean 
offered, with the collec, a mare de fram- 
boises, a brandy distilled from та 


sels. 


Mean Fui nd 


“At fivethirty in the mom 
he told me, “I'm driving you the 30 


meters to St-Chrisophe, to help me 
buy some live Charolais beef. 

As the sun rose, we were driving 
along the beautiful. gorge of the Loire, 
where the river is патом and white 
water races among the rocky pools. Al- 
ready the amateur fishermen were out, 
some with rods and lines, others with 
the large, round conical nets. “They're 
all friends of ours," said Јел Vell get 
the best of what they catch.” The valley 
opened out into the rolling vineyards of 
the Cotes Roannais, one of the minor 
areas, where we called at 


classified wi 
the vi 
Paulli 
a couple of barre 
the light c ine s 
rant. Then, over the hills to the village 
of Iguerande, to order three drums of 
walnut oil from the 10-year-old pressing 
plant of Jean Leblanc. Next, to the lovely 
Romanesque village of Marcigny and the 
ine Shalton, 


yard of another Troisgros friend, 
ve Lutz, so that Jean could order 
of Rosé dAmbierle, 
ved at the restau- 


fe wi 


who showed us her herd of snow-white 
females, all kept in a continuous. state 
of milk production by the industrious 
activities of a single, lordly, jecblack 
bouc, who seemed well satisfied with his 
life's work, We loaded the back of the 
station wagon with [our boxes of the small 
Mareigny cheeses half the 
size of a camembert, then headed toward 
St-Christophe. 

As we approached the village, the a 
was filled with the distant lowing of 
thousands of саше. The Charolais beet 
sale is the most famous in France. We 
rounded a bend in the narrow road and 
suddenly faced a sea of cattle—almost. 
1000 on sale that day. The owner sta 
by the head of the animal 
proclaims icent qua 
if it's the scruffiest beast you ¢ 
The ound the al, 
prodding it with a stick and loudly 
pointing out its faults. The seller asks 
double what he expects to get. The 
buyer offers half of what he expects to 
pay. Then the violent trading bi 

A beef animal bought by the Trois- 
gros brothers w ly weigh about 
1000 pounds y take only the 
contre-filets, the wwe Dackstrips of 
lean meat, which include all the best 
steak and r0astin bout ten per- 
cent of the carcass. The rest is once 
resold to retail butchers. Before leaving 
St-Christophe, soon after nine aar., we 
had handlers’ breakfast" at the 
Restaurant Chenaus, next door to the 
slaughterhouse. The place was jammed 
with about 300 of the brawniest men 
one has ever seen, most of them in blue- 
denim shirts that hung down to their 
knees. We started with а halfliter pot 
of а powerful, rough red Rhone wine. 
Then came a mountainous dish of beet 
stew. The meat seemed very fresh, Next, 
a wellaged. Магадпу goat cheese, which 
had a certain gastronomic relationship 
with the beef. ‘The smell reminded me 
unventilated caule barn on a hot 
y. This monster meal cost a dollar. 
Back in Roanne in time for lunch 
(but hardly hungry), I asked if 1 might 
kibitz with the kitchen crew. The six 
cooks are commanded by Jean, Pierre, the 
chef de cuisine, Michel, and the chef pi- 
lissier, André, Jean is mainly at the stoves. 
Pierre cuts all the meat. Michel takes care 
of the fish and the sauces. At the same 
time, cach of the bosses i 


each about 


gins. 


ing at and tasting everything. A bowl of 
salad is ready to go into the dining 
room. Pierre looks at it, pulls out a leaf 


and tastes the dressi 


S. then roundly 
bawls out the boy who made it, throws 
the salad into the garbage and orders a 
rush replacement 

One has no feeling of anything being 
ured or costaccounted. Mounds of 


пи 


butter, jugs of thick cream and bottles 
of wine are everywhere and seem to 
be added 10 everything in unlimited 
quantities, Everyone communicates con- 
tinuously by shouting—illtempered and 
tough shouting when the ge s rough 
and mistakes ai dle, jocular and sa- 
tiric shouting when things go well. The 
practical joke is never far below the 
surface. André walks across the. Kitchen. 
carrying a tower of empty aluminum 
cake pans. Pierre, at the butcher's block, 
flashes out his foot and trips him. The 
deale crash of the pans sets the 
whole kitchen to a roar of laughter. 
André, not amused, yells at the boys, 
“Pick "em up ad stalks off to his 
corner. 

As cach order is yelled 
firmed by Jean's answering shout. he 
takes down the proper pan for that 
order and seis it, empty. as а vemindei 
on the stove. He claims his system is 
foolproof, but by the time there are ten 
empty pans, he has been known to mut 
ter, “What the bloody hell is supposed 
to go into this one?” At moments опе 
senses, perhaps. the secret of the lifelong 
lationship between the two brothers 
Pierre has the force and the fury; he 
docs the bawling out, The boys watch 
him with a certain fear. Jean has the 
charm, He flashes his smile. He jumps in 
with soothing words. The boys watch 


and con- 


him with adoration. 
The pressures mount to a peak. The 
orders are like а barrage of machi 
gun fire. One has the vague feelin; 
crew of white-couted seamen wyi 
keep their ship afloat in а hurrican 
blare of noise, the figures rushing hither 
and thither, the irresistible chaos of е 
ing smells, the heat and spitting of the 
frying, the clang of pots, the bloomp. 
bloomp of chopping knives, all beat down 
with enveloping force umil one feels 
dizzy. 

Yet, in reality, everything is proceed- 
ing normally, everyone is efficiently ab- 
sorbed. A boy is quickly shelling a bowl 
of beautiful, pink crayfish. Michel is 
adding a shower of bright-green sorrel 10 
a brilliantly yellow sauce. André is ma 
ing patterns with peach halves on a tart 
shell. Pierre watches. everything and 
misses nothing. He could take over any 
job, from anyone, at amy moment, and 
do it Everyone. knows this and 
the effect is both disciplinary and exhils 


better. 


rating. One feels sure ıl a sud- 
denly felt himself 
of his fires, he would, before letting 


himself fall to the floor, take the piece of 


beef out of the oven to avoid its being 
overcooked. 
Lunch was over, the afternoon wa 


restful and. by dinnertime, E was again 
ready to face the joyous riches of the 


“Well, the machine says you had oue." 


247 


PLAYBOY 


248 


Troissros cuisine. On 
І ordered. from the 519 menu 
Since this is the dinner chosen by about 
90 percent of the tourists, 
most of the Troisgtos’ spec 
in the Guide Michelin. My meal began 
with a dish of pink, cold р 
fish on a bed of chopped gre 
lightly set off with a tomato-tinged 

ise. Next, the dish that has 
been most often acclaimed by 
as Troisgros most brilliant 


includes 


ched cray- 


creation: a thin escalope of fresh salmon, marrow. 
covered by a faindy acid sauce made a 1964 white burgundy, Puligny-Mon 
trachet, while the beef deserved 
agnum of 1961 Chamberti 


with sorrel, vermouth, white 
juice and copious quantities of butter 
and cream. “The uick is to add the 
finely chopped sorrel not more than 
ten seconds before you pour the sauce 


е, lemon 


Charolais beef, with à comp 


“So much for truck drivers’ knowing 
the best places to eat.” 


After cheeses and desserts, Jean of- 
fered, with the coffee, а privately dis 
over the salmon," Jean pointed out. “The tilled, unlabeled marc made [rom wild 
sorrel melts, but its Пахог is captured." plums, which, in finesse and richness 
The main course was an enirecéte of made many а cognac seem weak and 
ed red uninteresting. The meal was 
beaujolus suuce, thickened with beef nomic triumph 


‘The following day, after breakfast, 1 
reluctantly packed my bags. It was time 
for me to | Jean and Pierre came 
up to my room and said that they 


would all be greatly honored if I would 
have my farewell lunch with the family 
in the private dining room 
Шу honored by the invitation. 
It was a meal of perfect simplicity—a 
fitting end to a memorable visit. There 
was a salad of the last local green beans 
and tomatoes of the season. There was а 
whole pike, caught that morning in the 
gorge of the Loire, served with la Sauce 
à la Manière de Grand-maman—acamy, 
lemony, with the faint taste of shallots 
and speckled with the green of fresh 
ragon. Then a beautifully balanced 
liguillette de Boeuf. a stew with sweet 
baby carrots and small boiled potatoes. 
For the wine, they reminded me of my 
visit to. Monsieur Lutz by serving his 
charming Rosé d'Ambierle, Then came 
the Marcigny cheese to remind me of 
Madame Shalton's goats. Then the last 
raspberries and. strawberries of the sea- 
son—and champagne for die final toasts. 

1 raised my glass and gently goaded 


them: “Here's to your future. You are 
world-famous, you have more business 
than you can possibly handle. Here's to 
your rebuilding this place as a 300-seat 
restaurant. You have had large financial 
offers from Paris. Here's to your opening 
a great restaurant there.” 

Jean laughed: “If I wanted to be a 
businessman, I wouldn't be a chef.” 

Pierre said: “1 want to stay in the 
kitchen. 1 enjoy cooking with my 
brother.” 

The big bell danged for 12 o'clock. 

Everyone hurried off to his battle sta 
tion. I was lelt alone in the private 
dining room with papa Jean-Baptiste 
For a few moments, we sipped our 
champagne in silence. Then I asked: 
^What do you think is the essence of the 
T'roisgros philosophy?" 
Vhen my boys were young,” he said, 
“we used to go into the country together 
and, when we saw the Charolais cattle 
in the fields, D said, "Look, how they 
are at peace. They are at one with the 
earth—in perfect harmony.’ We try to 
achieve that harmony in this house, I 
believe our clients sense that harmony 
in the foods they eat here and the wines 
they drink here. Our essence, monsieur, 
is that our cuisine reflects the marvel of 
the earth.” 

Is this the greatest restaurant in the 
world? My mother once told me that 
she took me to my first restaurant when 
I was two years old. Since that day, I 
at D have eaten in 12474 
round the world. As far as I 
can remember, not one of them was ever 
as good as Troisgros. 


[У] 


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KEPHAS AND ELOHENU 


(continued from page 134) 


deals with the Devil. And of course he 
can’t deliver; he's just а fraud. (Chuckles) 
A lovable fraud. 1 don't put on airs the 
way he docs, I'm just a scenery mak 
Wilt) Thou abandon 
Thou madestest? Thine own 
handiwork which the race of men 
defiled- 

kernas: Hath 
person singular. 

Jarvis: Hath defiled in disobedience 
of Thine express command. 

керил: Wouldn't "Thy express com- 
mand" be better? 

rLonrNU: It’s followed by а vowel 
“Thy express command"? “Thine ex- 
press command"? Hard to be зше in 
these cases, 

kepttas: Look, Service, this archaic 
speech is all very nice, but none of us 
are quite up to it. 

коне (triumphantly): None of us 
is quite up to itt 

jarvis: Hath defiled in disobedience 
of Thine express command when Thou 
semest Thine only begotten son to re- 
deemeth us. When Thou spaketh to 
Moseth and. gaveth him Thy Ten Com- 
mandeciments— 

Kemas: Sit down, sit down. 

jarvis: Honor thy father and thy 
mother! Thou shalt not commit adul- 
tery! (Sits) 

KEPHAS: Take it easy. There, there. 


the 


defiled, Hath. Third 


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jarvis: Thou shalt not kill thy ma 
servant nor i 


servant. 
That's right. Don't worry. 
thing is going 10 be just fine. We 
have a few formalities. (Takes а pen) 
Your name is Alvin Service Garvis. 

JARVIS (exhausted): Jarvis 
Haris. 


Parvis 


KEPHAS: Yes. Age? 
jarvis: Twiddletyawo. 


REPTAS: or 
vices? 

jarvis: Avarice and hypocrisy. 

KepHAS (writing): Avarice and hy- 
poc-ra-cy. 

HLOMENU (without looking): You spelled 
hypocrisy wrong. 

КЕРНАУ: How? 

rronexU: You spelled it like di 
cy. Ht should be LS Y. 
tas (making the correction): 1 don't 
know why 1 should spot you fifty points 
if you're so smart. Occupation? 

ELOMENU: God. 

kernas: Not you, him. Service! What's 
your occupation? 

Jarvis (coming out of his trance) 
Man of the cloth 

ккгилз: Really? I wish you'd have a 
look at this robe. 
scam is? Tr's split 


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ki 


You see where the 
along the scam. Of 


Bor 472-PB Rogers. AR 72756 


urs old. Tut try 
They give you 
1 there. 

s a slight mis- 


unders 
nias (picking up phone): Get me 
the tailor shop. Hello! Who's this? Yo 
no speak ct me the boss. 

eption, 


A sl Im 


Jarvis: 

KEPHAS: Quiero hablar to the boss 
Mr. O'Grady. That you, O'Grady? I've 
got à worker for you. A man of the 
cloth. Well on the steam press, how 
should I know? What? It is? (Covers 
mouth piece) O'Grady says a man of the 
cloth i 


cher. 


pr 


Jarvis: That's what Гуе been trying 
to tell you. 
kernas: Not a ta all. Why did 


you siy you were a tailor? Hello, 
O'Grady? You're man ol 
the doth, What? усту funny, 
OG ‚ very funny. Same to you, 


with knobs. (Hangs 
about n 


АП this 
of the 
al you're a 


up) Si 
n of the cloth, m 


preacher. 


You speak in tongu 
ge 1 understand. 1 used 
te myself. 1 don't n 
telling you, Jarv, it looks good. 1 th 
youre in, (To rLomesu) What do you 
think? Ishe 

ELOMENU: It's up to you, 

kernas: 1 know it’s up to me, You've 
got an opinion, haven't you? 
LonENU: You want my op EVI 
vighi. (Confidentially) In my opinion, 
he's a tailor. In my opinion, he couldn't 
preach his way out of a wet paper bag, 

xirnAs: Suppose you're right, Even 
suppose yowre right. As a tailor, he's 


"Thats a 1 
wo preach a I 


h, but as a tailor, he 


il, a mere de 
А detail? Who just said you 
? Would anoth- 


rox: 
couldn 
er pair of hands hur 
Kepas: P can't n 
all cternity without 
1. 
вонем: Ж. 
d out what he knows about 


e him a tailor for 
iving him a fair 


Сте 


e you bigger than O'C 
kernas: Come here, 


JARVIS: Preach to you? Now? 
kernas: Why not? We're 
audience. Im from the New Т 
he's from the Old. Sock it to us, 
Jarvis; Could I have a set of golf 


perfect 
estament, 


erybody complains about overpopulation, but we get damned 


little gratitude for trying to do something about it.” 


dubs, please 
them. 
kernas (info plone): Rush a set of 
goll dubs up here. (Hangs up phone 
and takes out watch) Give us the old 
nd-erernal-d: bit, Put 
thunder imo your voice and voll your 
lot, Not that [ need to teach you 
business. Five seconds. Two seconds. 
(А sign reading vreach lights up) 
Jarvis: 1 understand that in addition 
10 the five thousind-odd people here 
in the main chapel of this great churcl 
there are also five hundred or more 
smaller chapel, whe can hear my voice 
although T should 
like to 
messa 


? І never preach without 


brimston: 


they c 
ure th 


Jarvis: You know—I've got a funny 
job. My job is to tell people what they 
already know. Is a stange thing for a 
grown man to be doing. And yet—think 
about it a Its wh 
From rk about the weather 


minute, we all do. 


1 rem 


isu 


to а closely reasoned newspaper editori 
al. How often have you felt a shock of 
recognition, a feeling of “This is u 


when a n bor tells you. "Nice day"? 

ELOUENU: You know, he's 

KEPHAS: Sh! 

Jarvis; Recently, I was talking with 
a man who seemed to have everything: 
a beautiful wile, good stock porilolio, 
game in the low eighties. And yet th 
man was miserable. He couldn't commun 
сие with his d: "phe shock of 
reca when cither of 


n This man turned 


them spoke to the oth 
to me and said, “Reverend, how 
olfended God?" I said to 
t offended with you, Bill. 
fends those who offend themselve: 
drew back. surprised. “Reverend,” 
said, “I've honestly never thou 
that way before.” The shock of recog 
ion. I had simply told him som 
he already knew, somet 
He went h 


he 
t of it 


251 


PLAYBOY 


252 


necklace and a new pair of dungarees. 
"Oh, Daddy.” she said, “you’ peach! 
—or whatever young people are saying 


nowadays. The shock of recognition w 
back. (Enter a DEMON in a golf cart with 
a set af clubs. He gives one to JARVIS 
and thereafter acts as his caddie) The 
other day. 1 was talking with an FBI 
agent. This man. scemed to have every 
thing: four lovely children, a vanch-style 
house and extensive slum properties 
And yet fate had not dealt kindly with 
this man. He had been instructed by his 
bureau to seduce the district. organizer 
of Panty. Here was а 
man who had been brought up in the 
Church: but he decided, wisely. I thi 
that his country's need overrode an 
other considerations. When he begged, 
after six months, 10 be relieved ol the 
ass L J. Edgar Hoover asked him 
personally 10 continue. And then it de- 
veloped that а terrible mistake һай been 
made, proba computer, The girl 
agent. Here w 
ned to have everything and 
who had the Seventh Com- 
mundment, as it tuned out dor 
reason. J. Edgar Hoover personally apolo- 
sized. And yet the sense of transgression 
Was strong in this man. It was ten years 
after this shattering incident that this 
man came to me. "What do you think I 
ought to do. Reverend?” he pleaded. 
Bil I said. 
bout breakin 
off said. 
Bill" Тао 
drew back 
said, “Гус honestly never thou 
that way before.” 

керил: What do you th 

rLonrNU: He's а tailor. 
off"—like a piece of thread. 


the Communist 


was herself an 
man who se 


a 


ited 


ho 


in oll? 


ak? 
Breaking it 


Jarvis (lighting a cigarette): Last 
week I was talking with a prominent 
industrialist. This n seemed to have 


everything: hundreds of natives toiling 
lis African mines, factories belching 
smoke (as he says this, he belches smoke), 
oil wells, brothels, bingo parlors, you 
ic it. On top of that, he was the gov- 
ernor of two states, Power? He had it. 
Don't make me laugh, And yet 
this man increasingly felt that his life 
hollow sham, that he was just filling 
on his way to the grave, “Rever 
» me, “Re where 
7 "Bill" I said, "Em no 
pro, but it looks very much to me as if 
you'r jecting your backswing.” He 
took my advice, and wham! Two hundred 
and fifty yards right down the middle of 
the patch. 

ELouENU: How did he make out hol- 
low shamwise? 


end. 


said 


Jarvis: You mustn't interrupt the 
sermon. 

ELOMENU: But you're not saying any- 
thing. 


Jarvis One more outburst and ТЇЇ 


clear the court. 


intolerable. Sergeant at 


arms! 
кь Jarvis, there's no one ош 
there. Wake up, Jarvis. (Snaps fingers) 
is on the basis of your sermon. 1 


hed a decision. You have a way 
h words, Jarvis, but there is about 
you a cert arity. 1 imagine tha 
you adhere proposition that it 
takes а heap o’ livin’ to make a house a 
home. 

mos 
thought. 

kemmas: I suspect, too, that you are 
partial to the season when the frost is 
on the punkin. 

jwevis; Am I ever! 

ELONENU 


Axiomatic, I would have 


That time of year thon mayst in 
me behold 

When yellaw leaves, or none, or 
few, do hang 

Upon those boughs which shake 
against the cold, 

Bare yuin'd choirs, 
sweet birds sang. 


here late the 


JARVIS: 


“We are lost!” the caplain shouted 
as he staggered down the stais, 

And ihe something something 
something, 

But his little daughter whisperer 
as she took his icy hand, 

“Isn't— 


керил That does it. Jarvis, you’ 
unacceptable. 

Jarvis: You mea 
to go to—to the other place 

Demon lakes the club [vom his hand, 
replaces it and drives ol]. 

REPNA: кте is no other place. 
There's upstairs and there's downstairs 
nd thats it. Downstairs its hot; they 
work hard and they laugh а lot 
t you a baker? Why wen 
а cobbler? You'd be useless down- 


you 
stairs. 
ELOHENU: He could learn a wade. It's 


never 100 lite. 

RKEPHAS: Never too , he's dead! 
Who ever heard of a dead man learning 
a trade? 

ко 


sv: It does sound silly when 


you put it thar way 

kernas: Then there's upstairs. Here, 
with us, and Beethoven and all those 
peopl 

jarvis: Td like that 

ELONENU: Beethoven wouldn't. He 
won't even talk to ns. 


КЕРИ. Why should hc? We could 
have composed the Rasoumovsky q 
tets if we mied all day. Let's face it, the 
only reason we're here is that we're the 
founders. And the thing is ағу, you 
wouldn't really feel at home. Jarvis— 


Jarv—I feel a certain affection for you. 
ME this is not entirely fault. 
Things might have been different. 1 
want you to go back and try again. 

JARVIS: You mean 1 don't have to be 
dead? 


kernas: Jarvis has to be dead, but you 


конт ing? They have 
no idea how it works. 

kernas: And it's so simple. (Consulis 
а list) You could be the Larsen baby 
Irs а boy and you'll be bom in about 
two months. The person 
be formed, so ther 
lose. 

parvis: What's my first 
as: That's up to your 
L Mrs. Jens Larsen. of Kristian 


ume? 


Norway. They're simple people. 
Ма. Larsen is a street cleaner. They'll g 
downstairs someday. If you live right, so 


will you. What do you say, Jarvis? 
JARVIS is silent, 
MENU: What do you sey, Larsen? 
TARVIS-LARSEN Lies on the floor and sobs 
loudly. Kermas quickly brings him a 
pacifier. 
kKernas: There, 


there, baby, baby. 
there, there, mustn't сту. Mommy's he 
Mommy, alll 
Rockaby, rockaby 
boom, boom, bo (Sings) 
“Baby's boa Iver dr ling on 
the sea. . . ." (Continues to hum until 
two angels enter and carry the sleeping 
JARVIS-LARSEN away. There is a silence. 
ELOHEN laughs) 

ELONENU: People. 

керил: What? 
wyo: People are funny 
ns: You're very profou 
No. but they аге. 

kKepuas: Well, who made the 
whose imi (Returns lo his desk) And 
whose turn is it? 

ELON I's mine and Tm making 
INTRAVENOUSLY. 

керил: You can't! It’s got too man 


Nice. round 


warn 


the 


round. 
heartbeat, 


«d. 


ТТЕ 
d in 


leners. Where did you get all those 
a leen? 
ELOMENU: I created them. 


керил: Well, 
Now, you р 
ELOHEN 


not admitting them. 
e right or T quit 
nt to play in French 


Mais oui, mon ami. 
D'accord, jouons en francais, 
попео: Voilà! 
2 AM Quel est ce mot? Voyons— 
trois, quatre, quatorze. . . . 
As murmurs on im French, 
ELONENU signals to the electricians. 
ELonesu: Let there be darkness. 
(Nothing happens) Come on—darkness. 
The lights are suddenly extinguished. 
Darkness is again on the face of the deep. 


KEPHAS 


“My God, young lady, you're way ahead of your time!” 


253 


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