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Warning. The Surgeon General Has Determined 
That Cigarette Smoking Is Dangerous to Your Health 


he Lory 


= > ©1978 saw Tg | 


Z Extra'coolness 
gives KOLE, — - 
=. the;most refreshing taste. - 
“you can get.in any cigarette. 4 


While you've been working your way up 
for all these years, we've been quietly 
waiting for you to arrive. 


Seagramrs VO. 
Bottled in Canada. г кал throughout the world. 


CANADIAN WHISKY. A BLEND OF CANADA'S FINEST WHISKIES. 6 YEARS OLD. 86.8 PROOF. SEAGRAH DISTILLERS CO., N.Y.C. 


ble high-backed easy chair, 
away fre tamp a little cavendish into your 
bowl and pour yourself a snifter of brandy. You'll want to 
feel snug—and safe—when you read William Hiortsberg's Falling 
Angel, a murder mystery with a twist of voodoo—plus an 
ending thav'll have you glancing over your shoulder for days. 
Our story is a condensation ol the novel that will soon be 
published by Harcourt Brace Jovanovich, and it’s illustrated 
in the best tradition of the dime novel by Ron Villani. There 
are two parts, the second to be presented next month. You'll 
need the time to get your blood running ag: 

We should also warn you that this issue contains perishable 
goods that should be consumed immediately. To wit, Phil 
Berger's account of the life and perilous times of Spinks, the 
current heavyweight boxing champion as we went to press. 
‘The mercurial Leon was due to delend his title against former 
champ Muhammad Ali about the time you read this, pi 
vided, writes Berger, he didn't self-destruct first. 

If you think Spinks pliys a rough game, consider The 
Inner Game of Sex. one we all play—handicapped by guilt, 
ir and misinformation. Robert Shea, former PLAYBOY editor 
and co-author (along with Robert Anton Wilson) of the sci-fi 
trilogy Hluminatus!, gives you tips on winning while keeping 
your sanity intact. 

Jobn Knight, heir apparent to the Knight-Ridder publish- 
ing empire, seemed to be a winner. But it took his violent 
death to yeveal just what game he was playing. The tr 
story of his double life, in the gay and straight worlds, will 
be found in Kings Don't Mean a Thing. an adaptation from 
Kings Don't Mean a Thing| The John Knight Murder Case, 
by Arthur Bell, to bc published by William Morrow. Vincent 
Topazio illustrates the skeleton in Knight's closet. 

Г, Lawrence Grobel conducted our cover-story in- 
terview with Barbra Stre Чу one year later, Grobel 
drew the assignment for our interview with Dolly Parton, who, 
© sure you've noticed, is on this month's cover. His luck 
t last. 

An equally fortunate man is John Hughes, who compiled the 
ег edition of our new feature 20 Questions. The sub- 
ject of the first mini-interview is Cheryl Tiegs, supermodel, TV 
personality and longtime friend of John's, who says, "I knew 
her when she was making only $1000 а day.” You've come a 


n the wi 


Jong way, John. 
Speaking of longtime friends, we haven't heard from Arnold 
Roth lor a while. Ah, but this month he’s back—with another 


nstallment of his illustrated History of Sex. He's 
УШ and still going strong. We didn't know sex 
old, or that funny! 

We do know that Donald Chaikin isn't [ ng with a full 
deck. His Wheels for the Alan Who Thinks Big may be 
tongue in cheek, but then it may not be. Let your 
wallet decide. 

If you've got any bread left after g Chaikin’s advice, 
you might want to pick up some new duds. Playboy's Fall and 
Winter Fashion Forecast, abl stal-balled by Fashion Edi 
tor David Plott, is filled with suggestions for filling out your 
cold-weather wardrobe. 

For the inner you, we profile potables from the Carib 
in The Dark Side of Rum. Emonuel Greenberg gives you the 
low-down on a few concoctions that'll have you running up 
the Jolly Roger at your next fun fest. (Gary Cooley is the 
illustrator.) 

In the there’s-more-where-thatccames 
present the second part of our p 
Pac 10. Valk about an embarrassment of riches! And then 
there's the magnificent Mary Hanson, our October Playmate. 
What more can we say? It's а heavy package. Go to it! 


up to Part 
was that 


rom department, we 
сап to the Girls of the 


GROBEL, PARTON 


PLAYBOY. 


vol. 25, no. 10—october, 1978 CONTENTS FOR THE MEN'S ENTERTAINMENT MAGAZINE 
3 
n 
2 
29 
j 32 
Folling Angel Р. 114 41 
42 
44 
45 
COMING АТТВАСПОМЅ ............................... 47 
THE! PLAYBOY ADVISOR a ызалы нас cascade 51 
E PLAYBOY SEX РОШ .......... wean ads HOWARD SMITH 59 
This month's question: What spectator sport is most sexually arousing? 
THEIPLAYBOYIEORUM ушул рл к ыы у 65 
PLAYBOY INTERVIEW: DOLLY PARTON—candid conversation ....... 81 


Our favorite mountain girl talks about sex, religion, her new sound, the movies 
shed like to make and everything else you might want to know, including 
her trusty sidearm and her lust for Fritos. 


FALLING ANGEL: PART I—fiction ........... . WILLIAM HJORTSBERG 114 
When a private detective tries to track down o missing Forties singer, the 
trail leads him into a web of voodoo and grisly murders. 


GIRL ON A DOLPHIN—pictorial as 120 
Denise Creedon is on underwater researcher with a knock for attracting 


friendly dolphins, which proves not only that dolphins ore intelligent but thai 
they have excellent taste. 


SPINKS—personelity . > white . PHIL BERGER 126 
A ringside view of the most disas TE prone heavyweight champion in history. 


WRIST ACTION—modern living .......... „Же. 130 


We know you don't want to be accused of having boring wrists, so we found 
nine watches and bracelets to catch the eye of the most jaded wrist watcher 


THE DARK SIDE OF RUM—drink ............ EMANUEL GREENBERG 133 
Long John Silver wouldn't be without his bottle of pungent rum, and—yo 
ho ho—neither should you, matey 


ROLLIN' ALONG—playboy’s playmate of the month ............. 136 
Actress Marcy Hanson travels in fast circles that include superdudes such as 
Rod Stewart and Joe Namath. 


Rum Go Р. 133 


GENERAL OFFICES: PLYNOV BUILDING. 919 NOWTH MICHIGAN AVE.. CHICAGO. ILLINOIS воен. RETURN POST 
ALLY ASSIGNED FOR PUOLICATION AND COPYRIGHT PURPOSES AND AS SUBJECT TO PLAYBOYS UNRESTRICTED RIGHT TO {DIY AND TO COMMENT EDHORIALLY. CONTENTS COPYRIGHT 
PLAYBOY, ALL FIGHTS RESERVED PLAYBOY AMD RAGUIT WEAD SYMBOL ARE MARKS OF PLAYBOY, REGISTERED U.S. PATENT OFFICE, MARCA REGISTRADA, WARGUE DEPOSEE. NOT! 
REPRINTED IM WHOLE он IM PART WITHOUT WRITTEN PERMISSION FROM THE PUBLISHER ANY SIMILARITY BETWEEN THE PEOPLE AND PLACES IN THE FICTION AND SEMIFICTION IM THIS MAGAZINE 
AND ARY REAL PEOPLE AND PLACES IS PURELY COINCIDENTAL. CREDITS: COVER: MODEL DOLLY PARTON, PHOTOGRAPHED DY HARRY LANGLON. OTHER PHOTCCRAPHY GY BILL ARSENAULT. P- 9. 
PETER 3. DANTOR, 161.170; DRENT BEAR, P. тї: MARIO CASILLL, P. 127 DAVID CHAN, P. 12, тва, 166168, 170; COURTESY CHICAGO HEALTH AND RACOUETDALL CLUN. P. 207. NICHOLAS 


E MUST ACCOMPANY ALL MANUSCAIFTS, DRAWINGS AND PHOTOGRAPHS SUBMITTED 


COVER STORY 

Lookin’ better than a body hos a right to, Dolly Parton, whose down-to-earth interview 
starts on page 81, was photographed by Harry Langdon in а variation on the Bunny 
costume she designed herself. How's that for multitalented? 


PLAYBOY'S PARTY JOKES—humor .......................... . M8 


THE INNER GAME OF SEX—article .............. . -ROBERT SHEA 150 
With o Zen approach to sex, it's a lot more fun, and you get enlightenment 
to boot. Quick! Whot's the sound of one thigh spreading? 


PLAYBOY'S FALL AND WINTER 

FASHION FORECAST—attire .,................ ...DAVID PLATT 153 
It's а season for independent thinking about clothes, so we help you choose 
your own style from the year’s best designs. 


KINGS DON'T MEAN А THING—artide .............. ARTHUR BELL 158 
When a young, respected publishing heir is murdered, his homosexual activities 
come to light. A stronger-than-fiction adaptation of a forthcoming book. 


ssi My 


GIRLS OF THE PAC 10: PART Il—pictorial ...... 
We found so many beautiful ladies at those Wes 
couldn't stop with just one pictorial. If you liked what you sow lost month, 
wait ll you check this out! 


Wrist Watching 


A TALE OF SILENT CUNNING—ribald classic . . . . MATTEO BANDELLO 173 


20 QUESTIONS: CHERYL TIEGS—mini-interview 22... .......... 176 
The years most popular model tells enough, if not ‘quite all, to PLAYBOY'S 
fortunate emissary, John Hughes. 


WHEELS FOR THE MAN 

WHO THINKS BIG—modem living .............. DONALD CHAIKIN 181 
With vehicles shrinking before our very eyes, there ore still a few extra- 
longs left for those who like driving in a large way. 


MANY HAPPY RETURNS—attire .............................. 186 
If you've still got those Ivy League shirts ond skinny ties left over from the 
early Sixties, congratulations. You ге back in style—almost. 


OBSERVING “OLDER WOMEN"—picorial ........... . 193 
An advance look at a new film from Conada that's likely to start autumn fever, 

A HANDSOMELY MOUNTED 

HISTORY OF SEX: PART Vill—humor ............... ARNOLD RCTH 198 

PLAYBOY'S PIPELINE . 203 
Man ond work, Јатаісо, health clubs, Government grants. 

REAY BOY BOIPOURRI. SST Saa E аз Байка cha a ie 260 


LITTLE ANNIE FANNY—satire. . . HARVEY KURTZMAN and WILL ELDER 277 


PLAYBOY ӨН) THE SCENE о ohne See sie a) ae 281 
Exercise equipment, tennis-stor threads, corkscrews. Shirt Tale 


182-187, NAIR BY AMID AND MAKE-U JE OF PIERRE MICHEL. INSERTS: PLAYBOY CLUBS INTERNATIONAL CARO. BETWEEN P. 32:32, 290.23. 


PLAYBOY, OCTOBER. 1978, VOL. 25. NO. 10. PUBLISHED MONTHLY BY PLAYEOY, IN NATIONAL AND REGIONAL EDITIONS. PLAYBOY BLOG., 949 M. MICHIGAN AVE., CHGO., ILL. SOSI! SECOND.CLASS 
POSTAGE PAID AT CHGD.. ILL. а AT ADDL. MAILING OFFICES, SUBSCRIPTIONS: IN THE U. S.. SA FOR ONE YEAR. POSTMASTER. SEND кой 3879 TO wtavsoy. P © жок 4436, BOULE, cove core 


PLAYBOY 


For color reproduction of Wild Turkey painting by hen Davies, 19" by 217 send $2 to Box 929, РВ, Wall St. Sta., NY. 10005 


Wild Turkey Lore: 


Wild Turkeys are masters of 


camouflage and evasion. 
A large flock of birds will lie 
quietly within yards of a man 
passing through the forest, 
and never be seen. 

The Wild Turkey is truly 
a native bird, unique to 
America. And it is the 
unique symbol of the 
finest native whiskey 
in America—Wild Turkey. 


WILD TURKEY/101 PROOF/8 YEARS OLD. 


Ф 1977 Austin, Nichols 


stiling Со, Lawrenceburg, Kentucky, 


PLAYBOY 


HUGH M. HEFNER 
editor and publisher 


NAT LEHRMAN associate publisher 


ARTHUR KRETCHMER editorial director 


ARTHUR PAUL art director 
SHELDON WAX managing editor 
GARY COLE photography editor 


С. BARRY GOL xecutive editor 


TOM STAEBLER executive art director 


EDITORIAL 
LAURENCE GONZALES editor; FIC- 
WRIA CHEN HAIDER editor; STAFF: 
CATCHPOLE, WILLIAM у. HELMER, 
GRETCHEN MC NEFSE, DAVID STEVENS senior edi- 
tors; JAMES R. 
JOHN BLUMENTHAI 
NELLIS, JOHN REZEK associate editors; WALTER 
L. LOWE, KATE NOLAN, J. F. O'CONNOR, TOM 
PASSAVANT, ALEXA SEHK (forum), FD WALKER 
assistant editors; SERVICE FEATURES: TOM 
owen modern living editor; vavi Art 
fashion editor; CARTOONS: MICHELLE URRY 
editor; COPY: ARLENE BOURAS editor; JACKIE 
JOHNSON FORMELLER, MARCY MARCHI, MARSHA 
SUSAN O'BRIEN, BECKY THALIR-DO 

ZION researchers; CONTRIBUTING 
ORS: MURRAY FISHER, NAT HENTOFF, 
ANSON MOUNT, PETER ROSS RANGE, RICHARD 
RHODES, ROBERT SHERRILL, DAVID STANDISH. 
BRUCE WILLIAMSON (movies) 


WEST COAST: LAWRENCE 5. DIETZ editor 


ART 

KERIG POPE managing director; LEN WILLIS, 
CHET SUSKI senior directors; вов VOST, SRI 
WILLIAMSON associate directors; WHUCE 
JOSEPH PACZEK assistant directors; BETH KASIK 
Senior art assistant; PEARL MIURA art assistant; 
vicki HAINES traffic coordinator; DARBARA 
HOFFMAN administrative assistant 


PHOTOGRAPHY 
MARILYN GRABOWSKI west coast editor; JEFF 
COHEN, JANICE MOSES associate editors; HOLLIS 
WAYNE new york edilor; RICHARD FTGLEY, 
FOMPEO row staff photographers; JAMES 
LARSON photo manager; вил. ARSEN. DON 
AZUMA, DAVID CHAN, PHILLIP DIXON, DWIGHT 
HOOKER, R. SCOTT HOOPER, RICHARD IZUN 
KEN MARCUS, ALEXAS окил contributing pho- 
fographers; PATTY BEAUDET, MICHAL BERRY 
assistant edilors; JAMES WARD color lab super- 
visor; ROBERT CHELIUS administrative editor 


PRODU 
JOMN Mastro director; ALLEN VARGO man- 
ager; ELEANORE WAGNER, МАША MANDIS, 

»Y JUKGETO, RICHARD QUARTAROL assistants 


READER SERVICE 
JANE COWEN SCHOEN manager 


CIRCULATION 
RICHARD SMITH director; J. R. AKDISSONE news- 
stand sales manager; ALVIN WIEMOLD subscrip- 
tion manager 


ADVERTISING 
HENRY W. MARKS advertising director 


ADMINISTRATIVE 
MICHAEL LAURENCE business manager; PATRICIA 
PAPANGELIS administrative editor; TERESA 
мскгЕ rights & permissions manager; ми. 
DRED ZIMMERMAN administrative assistant 


PLAYBOY ENTERPRISES, INC. 
DERICK J. DANIELS president 


The single 
biggest 
mistake you 
can make. 


From the outside, all speakers look pretty much the same. 

But buying an off-brand, bargain speaker can be a very big mistake. 

Since speakers are the only components that actually produce sound, when you 
compromise your speakers you compromise your entire music system. 

Fortunately, there's one way to make sure you wind up with a speaker that sounds as 
good as it looks: Buy a speaker with a name as good as the rest of your components. 

At Kenwood, we didn't just start with a bunch of commercially available speaker parts. 

We started with a goal: To deliver a crisp, clean sound that accurately reproduces the original music. 

To begin with, we create each raw frame speaker. 

For the tweeter and the midrange, we used 
a computer to design light-weight, extra-rigid 
cones. And by properly designing the weight of 
the voice-coil with the cone assembly in the 
woofer, we have eliminated the crossover-coil: 
One of the major causes of speaker distortion. 

We mount our speakers on a lumber-core 
baffle board made of special anti-resonant 
material. And design the enclosure to assure an 
acoustic match between cabinet and 
components. 

Though you can't see all that by just looking 
at a Kenwood speaker, you'll know it the first 
time you listen. 

Next time you're at your Kenwood dealer, 
compare our $180.00", 3-way LS-407B with any 
off-brand speaker. Or, for that matter, with any 
speaker at all. 

You'll save yourself from making a big mistake. || 


Your speakers’ reputation should 
be as good as your receiver's. 


Ф KENWOOD 


For the dealer nearest you, see your Yellow Pages, 

or write Kenwood, PO. Box 6213, Carson, CA 90749. 
“Nationally advertised value. Actual prices are extablshed by Kenwood dealers. 
‘Walnut grain vinyl finished cabinet. In Canada: Magnasonic Canada, Ltd. 


INSTA 


nd “Polavision”® © 1978 Polaroid Corporation. 


“Polaroi 


i ES = 


Polaroid, the inventor of instant pictures, 
introduces the second revolution in photog- 
raphy. Movies you can see in brilliant color sec- 
onds after you’ve taken them. Movies you can 
take even if you’ve never held a motion picture 
camera before. Movies your family can view 
again and again, on a compact, elegant player 
that sits out on a table or tuck: 
See how simple it is: 

1. Drop a cassette into the lightweight, au- 


s into a bookshelf. 


tomatic Polavision camera. Squeeze the trigger, 
and you're making your movie—the kids playing 
ball, a family party, your wife's golf swing. You 
can zoom in for dramatic closc- [7 [= 
ups or pull back for wide shots. 

2. When your movie 
is finished (and you'll be delighted to see how 
many sequences you can shoot in 2¥2 minutes), 
drop the cassette into your Polavision player. 

3. In seconds, your instant movie appears 
on the screen. (That simple-looking cassette 
has actually recorded in breathtaking detail the 
images you saw through the viewfinder.) The 
picture is sharp, the colors rich and clear. 
There's no projector or movie screen to set up, 
no threading or winding. ‘To start the player, 
you just drop in a cassette. Children can enter- 
tain themselves indefinitely replaying the cas- 
settes. Treat your family to a Polavision system. 
Enjoy the new experience of making instant 
movies, and start building a living diary of the 
memorable moments of your life. 


ME General Wine & Spirits Co. МУС 80 proof 
Ш 


ЧАДА! СО RUM COMPANY 
UER!O RICO +40 PROOF 


Meet 
onrico of Puerto Rico. 


Who is he? Down deep, inside, where it counts, 

He's the descendant of 6 generations of ^ Ronrico has character. A fineness. The result 
Puerto Rican rum-masters (since 1860). of decades of distilling — and perfecting. 

And he's no ordinary rum So for authentic rum of Puerto Rico, get to 


He's smooth. Light in manner. A good know Ronrico. 
mixer. And — more. A well-bred fellow. 


THE WORLD OF PLAYBOY 


in which we offer an insider’s look at what’s doing and who’s doing it 


TENNIS, ANYONE? STARS 
PLAY AT MANSION WEST 


Once again, the grounds of Playboy Mansion 
West were the scene of the annual tennis tour- 
nament benefiting the John Tracy Clinic, and ce- 
lebrities turned out by the score—both to play 
and to watch the sometimes heated competition. 
At left, shutters click as host Hugh M. Hefner 
welcomes America’s reigning sex symbol, 
model-video personality Cheryl Tiegs (see 20 
Questions, page 176). Cheryl, it turned out, also 
showed a winning personality on the courts. 


Above, actor Dennis (Felony Squad) Cole and his lady, 
Jaclyn (Charlie's Angels) Smith, observe the goings-on 
at the tournament; below, Hefner greets tennis pro Alex 
Olmedo, a Tracy regular, as ace Jimmy Connors and our 
June Playmate, Gail Stanton, in from Memphis, look on. 


Actor/comic/educator/TV pitchman Bill Cosby turns his back on the 
world-ranked tennis player Ше Nastase—to а purpose, as Nasty 
signs an autograph for one of the many fans present at the Tracy 
Clinic meet. (For court star Cos in a diferent role, see page 16.) 


CLUTCH PLAYERS HONORED 


Winners of our  Cash-on-the-Line, 
Clutch-Player All-Star Poll (PLAvBov, 
June) have been getting an extra treat: 
personal presentations by Playmates. 
Well, some of them have. That is not 
Cesar Cedefio of the Houston Astros 
with Playmate Debra Jo Fondren at left. 
Cedefio, named center fielder of our 
Clutch All-Star team, came in second 
best in an altercation with the dugout 
roof the day Debra showed up. So 
manager Bill Virdon did the honors. 
Luckier were Twin Rod Carew and 
Royal George Brett, who did get to meet 
Miss June 1978, Gail Stanton (right). 


THE WORLD OF PLAYBOY 


PLAYMATE UPDATE: 
CLAUDIA JENNINGS 
STARS IN “DEATHSPORT” 


Our November 1969 Playmate 
(and 1970 Playmate of the 
Year), Claudia Jennings (tar 
right), stars opposite David 
Carradine in Roger Corman's 
futuristic thriller, Deathsport 
(right). It's set in the year 3000, 
when capital punishment has 
been abolished—only to be re- 
placed by mortal combat in the 
arena, a sentence meted out to 
certain criminals. Sounds like 
Demetrius and the Gladiators 
Meet the 31st Century, but 
Claudia, obviously, is gorgeous 
whether past, present or future. 


BIG ROLE FOR SONDRA 


July 1977 Playmate Sondra Theodore, who has 
a small role in Universal's Skateboard, gets her 
first major film break opposite Christopher 
Mitchum (above) in Avco Embassy's Stingray, 
in which she plays a resourceful hitchhiker. 


MONKEY BIZ 
You'll be able to see 
our April centerfold 
girl, Pamela Jean Bry- 
in a made-for-tel- 
ion movie on the 
NBC-TV network this 
fall. The Universal 
production is titled BJ 
and ihe Bear, and 
Pam appears along 
with Greg Evigan and 
Sam the Chimp. That's 
Pam, Greg and Sam 
at right, taking advan- 
tage of a moment's 
break in the shooting 
schedule on the Uni- 
versal lot. Sam's smil- 
ing because he'd 
never met a Playmate. 


AH, TO BE PLAYMATE OF THE YEAR 


Texas, after all, is a pretty big place, so our newly chosen Playmate of 
the Year, Debra Jo Fondren, who hails from there, had not one but two 
Press-luncheon announcement parties: one in Houston and one in 


Dallas. At left, Debra checks out a T-shirt presented by Tom Sasser of 
station KLIF, Dallas; above, she talks with KRIV-TV's talk-show host 
Harold Gunn and actor Michael (FM) Brandon about the Houston gala. 


\ 
IMPORTED CANADIAN WHISKY-A BLEND . BO PROOF САМЕТ OIST. CO., N Y.C. 


Wherever you go, it’s making a 

splash. What’s behind its super success? 
Super lightness, supetb taste. 

If that’s what you're looking for, set 
your course for Lord Calvert Canadian. 


Se a ee 
ТЕ (РЕ Superstar Mec 
P Xe Dun с SO MES 


Your family will 


love our family. 


Our family has more than 60 children. And it’s still growing. Our family is the Quasar 


electronics family. A family of 60 fine products that utilize the latest developments 
in electronic, microwave and microcomputer technology to give you the ultimate 
in performance and reliability. As a result of our efforts, we can offer you a wide 
selection of fine television products in virtually every screen size. 

We've got a whole new line of small AC/DC 
battery-powered black and white portables 
that let you take your favorite show wherever 
you go, whether it's the boat, the beach, the 
patio or out to the ballgame. 

If youre in the market for a table model 

color set, we've got one to meet your 

needs. We've got 13”diagonal and 15" 

diagonal sets that are perfect for the bed- "s 

room, kitchen or den. And a broad range of 19” 

(diagonal sets topped by a feature-filled model that even boasts an 
expanded-range three speaker sound system to make every show you 

watch more vivid and exciting. And all of this is in addition to a line that 

includes a broad range of 25” diagonal consoles boasting superb pictures 
as well as exquisite cabinetry ina : 

ММ wide variety of styles to match the 
decor of virtually any room. Most manufacturers would have stopped 
right there. But our family is still growing. 

Back in 1976, we introduced the first two-hour home video cassette 
system, the Quasar VR1000. Then, while many other companies were 
trying to build their first, we added a second system, the Quasar VH5000, 
boasting a full four-hour recording capacity. And that's nor all. 

Soon we'll be introducing an incredible new projection television 
system with a giant five-foot screen that fills your room with color and allows 
you to become even more involved with all your favorite shows. (And unlike 
other projection televisions you may have seen, ours has a unique lens system 

that allows you to watch with all the 

normal room lights on!) 

Quasar has even 
moved into the kitch- 
en. By introducing 
an amazing new mi- 
crowave oven that 
lets you program a 
perfect meal with 
one incredible touch! 
So Mom can get mouth- 
watering results without having to set 
cooking times, temperatures or power settings. 
f As you can see, our family in Franklin Park, Illinois is ~ 
growing bigger and stronger by the day. With plenty of fresh new offspring 
growing on the drawing boards daily. i 
Why don't you introduce your family to our family? It could be the beginning of a lifelong friendship. 


j swaro ricrune 


Quasar Electro 


x Franklin Park, Illinois 60: 


THE WORLD OF PLAYBOY 


HAPPY TENTH BIRTHDAY 
TO LAKE GENEVA RESORT 


Seems like only yesterday that 
Playboy's Resort & Country Club at 
Lake Geneva, Wisconsin, opened its 
doors—with a surprise appearance by 
Bill Cosby at an employees-only pre- 
view followed by a gala charity bene- 
fit. Actually, it was ten years ago, and 
Cos returned to emcee the happy- 
birthday celebration; that's Grant 
Robbin, one of the featured enter- 
tainers on the program, with him at 
right. The staff at the Playboy resort, 
which has just been given Mobil 
Travel Guide's prestigious four-star 
rating, pulled out all stops to enter- 
tain its VIP guests а! the anniversary 
bash. Included, besides the star- 
studded show in the Entertainment 
Center, were dinners, receptions and 
pinball and backgammon tourneys. 


At the grand finale, a bevy of Bunnies joins the Velvet Fog himself, singer Mel Tormé, 
onstage in the Entertainment Center. Proceeds of the show went to the Variety Club 


of Wisconsin's Children's Chariti 


j, the Lake Geneva Y.M.C.A. and the Black United Fund. 


HEFNER BOOSTS BROWN 


While everybody else was celebrating at 
Lake Geneva, Hef was playing host at a 
fund raiser for California governor Jerry 
Brown's re-election campaign. Above, 
Brown, with Hefner at his side, addresses 
the guests; at left, part of the crowd on 
the sprawling Mansion West grounds. 


For a private cocktail party and buffet 
dinner, the resort's Cabaret was trans- 
formed into a tropical fantasy complete 
with flowering plants, ice sculptures, 
goldfish swimming in pools and seem- 
ingly endless, mouth-watering displays 
of food such as the one being served 
above. Below, the sentimental hit of the 
anniversary show: Jazz pianist Eubie 
Blake, 95 years young, does his thing. 


Featured entertainer in the Cabaret at 
Lake Geneva at the time of the birthday 
parly was singer James Darren (below), 
who did a one-man show Friday night, 
as well as Saturday's stage spectacular. 


“Low tar Real tastes 
strong enough to satisfy... 
cool enough to refresh. | 


й__ 


The strong tasting low tar menthol. | : 
Only 8mg tar. | 


Real 


Warning: The Surgeon General Has Determined 
That Cigarette Smoking Is Dangerous to Your Health, 


MENTHOL: 8 mg. "tar", 0.6 mg. nicotine av. per cigarette, FTC Report MAY 78. 


THE WORLD OF PLAYBOY 


BRIDE-EYED & BUSHY-TAILED 


When Bunny Valarie Henderson became 
Mrs. Jeffrey Gaynor at the Playboy 
Resor! & Country Club at Great Gorge, 
she wore a white Bunny costume. 


COVER GIRL INTERVIEWED 


Our July cover girl, Pamela Sue Martin, 
former star of the Nancy Drew video se- 
Чез, talks with guest host Hugh Downs, 
who was substituting for regular David 
Hartman on ABC-TV's Good Morning, 
America. Waking up to Pamela is a treat. 


WE FOIL A BURGLARY 


A would-be burglar at the home of Hank 
Ingram in Norwich, Connecticut, might 
have escaped with his loot but for us. 
Ingram (above) returned to find a pile of 
loot on his bed and a copy of PLAYBOY 
on the floor by a closet. He sized up the 
situation and locked the intruder in the 
closet until the cops arrived. Case closed. 


RECEPTION, SMOKER, CARTOON IN THE SPOTLIGHT 


Margaret Standish, Executive Director of the Playboy Foundation, was honored at a re- 
ception given by the Midwest Women's Center at the Artemisia Gallery, a showplace for 
women’s art in Chicago. The gallery's Lucia Beier presented her with a wall hanging by 
Phyllis MacDonald (left). Above, fun at the Cornell’ Smoker, sponsored annually by 
Cornell University’s School of Hotel Administration in conjunction with the National 
Restaurant Association convention and held this year at Chicago's Playboy 
Towers. Below: Was Molley's Crew's creator following our Girls of the Pac 10 recruiters? 


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PLAYBOY MAGAZINE. 


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The Jaguar S-type is strong. It is quick 
and agile in its response to any challenge 
on the road. That strength and agility 
comes from a unique source: the famous 
Jaguar electronically fuel-injected V-12 
engine. An engine that is only 5.3 liters 
in displacement, yet develops an aston- 
ishing 244.4 horsepower at 5250 RPM. 
Jaguar engineers call it virtually inde- 
structible. 

To further confirm that strength, an 
S-type took five Category | victories and 
the Driver's Championship in 1977, its first 
Trans Am season 

To match its uncommon power with its 
handling. the S-type is fitted out with in- 


dependent suspension all around, very 
Precise power-assisted rack and pinion 
Steering, four-wheel power disc brakes, 
and steel belted radial tires. In fact, the 
XJ-S may well be the best-handling four- 
passenger car in the world 

The sleekness of the S-type is not 
merely cosmetic. It was achieved through 
exhaustive wind tunnel tests. Its purpose: 
to give the XJ-S even greater stability at 
speed. 

And the silence of Jaguar's S-type is 
golden. It is the result of great care and 
craftsmanship: thick rugs on the floor, 
rich Connolly leather seats, thermostat 
cally-controlled heat and air condition- 


pe 


ing, AM/FM stereo radio and tape system 
and so-many other thoughtful and luxuri- 
ous touches that there are no factory op- 
tions available whatsoever. 

The XJ-S. Strong, sleek and silent. 
Here is a car of such uncommon capabil- 
ities and luxuries, that it may well redetine 
your expectations of what a grand tour- 
ing car can deliver. 

For the name of theJaguar dealer 
closest to you, call these numbers toll- 
free: (800) 447-4700, or, in 
Illinois, (800) 322-4400. 


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СОІВҮ OF THE CIA 

Your July interview 
rector of CLA Wi 
your be 


with former di 
olby is simply 
It is encourag- 
ing to know that there are people such 
as Colby who can talk with as much 
knowledge of CIA operations and activi- 
ties as did the likes of Snepp and Agee, 
but without naming names, details and 
locations of people still involved in those 
important intelligence operations. Snepp 
and Agee are no different from people 
such as Benedict Arnold, Lord Haw-Haw 
or Vidkun Quisling. Surely, they are en- 
titled to no less an illustrious fate 
Peter Lebowitz 
Elmhurst, New York 


Let me be one of the first to congrat- 
ulate Laurence Gonzales on his репе 
trating interview with William Colby. 

broad and persistent question- 
ing brought focus t several points that 
Fm sure many thinking people have 
wondered (and perhaps worried) about 
for years, 


Jesse К. Bailey 
no, California 


The Colby interview is a real Чоогу 


Colby, when questioned the 
mental stance of a fuzzy-thinking, con- 
fused dullard. But be not deceived. 1 sus 


acide of vapidity 
ingly dev 


fellow—one 
ght vagueness in speech to a 
gh art, Colby has given us an absolute 
demonstration of the difficult discipline 
ol speaking while sayi 


ach night, kneel down 
nks for the excel 
done in th 
rence Соп. 


es, Asa Baber, all liberal 
ck Anderson and all our 


ASSOCIATE ADVERTISING MANAGER. S19 N. MICHIGAN AVE: DETROIT, WILLIAM F MOORE. MANAGER. fit тангы кїрє 


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liberal Democrats, both inside and out 
side Congress. They have made our once. 
good CIA the laughingstock of the 
K.G.B. and the world. In competing with 
our enemies, anyone who preaches 

inst covert actions, illegal wire 
ete., has to have his head in the sand 
soon will get his tail blown off by our 
enemies. 


Robert Cillmor 
Fredericksburg, Virginia 


I have just finished reading the 
Playboy Interview with Colby and per- 
sonally feel that it justifies the price of 
my two-year subscription! My compli- 
ments to Gonzales for quite an insight 
into one of the nation’s most intriguing 
characters. 


15/3 Ian M. Satchell 
U.S. Navy 
San Francisco, California 


SAGAN AS SAGE 

Concerning Carl Sagan's article in your 
July issue titled Astral Projection and 
the Horse That Could Count, Sagan has 
many valid points on many topics. 
ever, Sa; n ast 
pert on ex 
says the Dogon tribe could not have 
come from the Dog Star, Sirius, Its 
legends, he says, must have come from 


contact with Europeans who used the 
telescope or with those who read 
about it and stopped by for a visit with 


the tribe. 


What nonsense! Where is 
iiic or historical proof for 
meni? 

awrence Fenwick 

UFO Research New 
Willowdale, Ontario 


I read with interest Carl Sagan's ar- 
ticle Astral Projection and the Horse 
That Could Count. While I am in full 
accord with the necessity to combs 
pseudo science, 1 object to the unsci 
tific process of mixing "apples, огап, 


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21 


PLAYBOY 


BALLY | 


Footwear, apparel, and accessories 
for the discriminating man. 


SHOWN: Scotch-grain, all-leather one-suiter, $600.00; mahogany- 
colored leather bag (#436), $135.00; 11 ¥2-inch, mid-calf boots (TEXAS) 
in black and mahogany, $225.00; 6-inch zippered boots (on bed, 
NELSON) in black, brown and navy, $146.00; 62-inch burgundy 
jodhpur boots (in suitcase, CONTE), $185.00; belts, $38.00 each; ties, 
$35.00 each. 


For Style Folder, write Dept. S. 


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and cows in onc pot" Specifically 
object to a scientist of. Dr. Sagan's acu- 
men who continues to confuse the UFO 
phenomenon with one single thcory of 
its origin; namely, that UFOs are ex- 
traterrestrial spacecraft. On the basis of 
experience in the study of the 
problem, I think it quite unlikely that 
such a complex phenomenon will reduce 
to one single, simple solution. It is in- 
cumbent оп us as scientists to be inti- 
tely f: ar with the properties of 
such an е we should study the 
phenomenon and not just onc single 
interpretation. We do know that UFO 
reports exist, that they come from all 
parts of the world and that m: 
made by highly responsible peo 
that is the phenomenon. Why it exists 
should be the basis of our study. 

Dr. J. Allen Hynek, Director 

Center for UFO Studies 

Evanston, Ilinois 


It is, as always, a pleasure for me to 
immerse myself in Carl 5а 


His recent article will undoubtedly rouse 
the indignation of those who do not 
value rationality or, perhaps, have never 
it. Fortunately, the law de- 
s them of the only argument they 
€ ever been able to use effectively — 
the thumbscrew and the rack—so Carl 
is sale, 


C Asimov 
New York, New York 


Dr. Carl Sagan is certainly correct in 
his assertion that the best antidote for 
pseudo science is science, but the judg- 
ment as to what constitutes false and 
science can only emerge from seri 
ous and responsible inquiry that be 
with skepticism rather than do, 
denials. "s well-balanced views are, 
unfortun, 
fellow scientists, 
expel maverick claims as false without 
proper assessment of the evidence. Al- 
though the claimants for paranor 
events include charlatans and fools, 

gross error to lump all d 
such phenomena into a common camp, 
label them pseudo scientists and irrati 
al and use the authority of current scien- 
tific views to block furth 


Ypsilanti, Michigan 


I'll bring in a piece of 
gan and NASA will br 
à black hole. 


3 UFO il Carl 
in a piece of 


Patrick Grace 
icus, Gc 


FONDA FACE-OFF 

Who is J Harwood (Saint Jane and 
the Hollywood Dragon, vtvuov, July)? 
And for w possible rea 
PLAYBOY seen fit to publish his not-so-fit 


эһ has 


character slashing? The fact that Jane 


Fonda 


terminally суп 


same 
verse 
that 


deserves. The good Samarit 


actually à 


lowed such a shallow, 
al "reporter" to sit in the 
trader with her, much less con- 
calmly with him, is proof positive 
nonization is the very least she 


would surely have balked at such a task. 


Jan 
of а 
about 


but most of all, about her leftist pol 
and how she was ^ 


Rikk David 
Grand Rapids, Mich: 


е Fonda couldn't act her way out 
disco movie, Fm sick of hearing 
her as actress, her “comeback,” 


he” about the war. 


You might be fooling them in Holly- 


wood, 


a cliché straight out of a rich-debutant 


falls-i 
fil 


Jane, but the rest of us see you as 


lovewith-poor-but-honest-laborer 


of the Thirties. Grow up, Jane. Quit 


hiding your Mercedes. 


EVAN! 
I'm 


John Ryan 
champaign, Mlinois 


IGELICAL EVERTS 
delighted that Playboy's Roving 


Eye focuses on Kellie Everts in the July 


uc 
pictor 


the years—trom her Miss Nude 
crowning ( 
parable 


1977) 


Ive followed Kellie's career as 
i "s pages thi 


bruary 1968) to her incom- 
of Humping Iron (Мау 
to her evangelical ecdysis last 


July—and have come to the conclusion 


that sl 


he possesses the most anatomically 


perfect, God-given female form in Amer- 
ica today. Kellie's conversion from the 


sect ol 


a Stripper for Christ m 
ntry on to religion! I hope Kellie is 


co 


E One World ht and rebirth as 


y turn the whole 


reincarnated in PLAYBOY often. 


Fol 
issue, 


William R. Jenkins IHE 

Greenwich, Connecticut 
lowing her appearance in the July 
Kellie wrote: 


“Tomorrow Гат going to Washington, 


D. 


where 


to strip and to preach. The place 


I will dance is the Plaza. Bur- 


lesque Theater; the place where 1 will 
preach is Lafayette Square, across from 


the W 


Vhite House. We have hundreds of 


free rosaries and prayer. books to give 
out. My theme will be that we must call 


1o mi 


nd the words of the Blessed Virgin 


at Fatima—that she told us to pray the 


Rosar 
else. 


y for the conversion of Russia—or 
If Russia is not converted, there 


IMPORT 


LANCERS! 


А RED DINNER WINE 
vernon 


LM. nvroNsECS UN 


TENETE 


“In California, call (408) 996-1010. 


10260 Bandley Dr., Cupertino, California 95014. 


23 


GIVE MORE/SAVE MORE 


Send a one-year 
subscription te: 


өм nra" 912 EERE 


regular subscription rate) 
My Name. 


(please print) 
Address. 


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сиу. 


О Send unsigned gift card to me. 

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"Based on $25.00 yearly newsstand price. 
Regular subscription rate, $14 a year. 


Rates apply to US... U.S. Poss., APO-FPO addresses only. 
Canadian gift rate: first lyr. sub. $15; additional Lyr gift subs. $13. 


subscriptions. 


Mail your order to: 


PLAYBOY, Р.О. Box 2420, Boulder, Colorado 80302 
Or for Faster Service 24 Hours 


Choose either 

А, the Playmate of the 
‘Year Card featuring 
Debra Jo Fondren, or 
B. the Playboy 

Rabbit Card, 

to announce your gift. 


Circle preference here: 
A 


a Day, You Can Order by Phone: CALL TOLL-FREE 800-621-1116. (ох, call 8009726727) 


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the men on your list in one easy order. 
and save, too, with our special holiday rat 
Put pen in hand and order today 


PLAYBOY 


26 


may be a nuclear war. My girlfriend in 
Washington called the Soviet embassy 
and invited them to come to a little press 
party we are having. They said they 
would ‘take it under consideration’ (ha- 
haj. Who knows—miracles do happen.” 


NEIMAN ADDENDA 

The LeRoy Мей rtfolio in the 
July issue of pLaynoy, which mentions 
the electronic palette. neglects to include 
the New York Institute of Technology 
as part of a triumvirate. The picce 
credits only CBS and Ampex while omit- 
ting the important factor that the proto- 
type system and all the subsequent 
computer software were developed at 
the college and made available to CBS 
and Ampex. An claborate computer. 

phics division exists ou campus th 
tellectual mechanism behind this 
п. The original software and 
аге installations were entirely de 


veloped by NYIT scientists Drs. Edwin 
Catmull Smith at the 
aphics center on the Old 


у campus. The electronic-palette 
system as it was released was a joint effort 
by CBS, Ampex and the New York Insti- 
tute of Technology. 

Chris Capone, Director of 

Public Relations 
New York Institute of Technology 
Old Westbury, New York 


Excluding the fact that LeRoy N 
man is an excellent artist, he should go 
back to school and review his Roman 
erals. The number 14 in Roman nu- 
merals is XIV, not IVX (sce the foldout). 
Perhaps he was using his artistic frec- 
dom, but for us perennial students, he 
kes it very confusing. 

Jeremy J. Krantz 

West Nyack, New York 


TRUE GRIT 

L thought Galahad (etavnoy, July) 
was truly funky! The author, Walter L. 
Lowe, Jr. might have occasional illu- 
sions that he, too, is among the greal- 
est... fiction writers, t is. His story 
has the grit of truth to it and the ethnic 
style captured їп all 
splendor. 


Benjamin Panky 
Lucasville, Ohio 


WHEN IT RAINS. . . 
Congratu Miss 
Elaine Morton, is by far th 
tiful Playn 


ions, 


July, Karen 

most beau- 

ate E have ever seen 
Rusty Key 

Lockhart, Texas 


Having recently returned from tem- 
porary duty in Ireland, I was extremely 
happy to find the July rLaysoy waiting 
for me in my mailbox, Thumbing 
through the pages, I found that Karen 
Elaine Morton really warmed my chilled 


bones! Keep up the good worl 
Scott Goodrich 

Homestead AFB, Florida. 

Will do, Scolt. This shot should warm 


you even in your new “homestead.” 


Karen Morton is fabulous! If she 
doesn’t get to be Playmate of the Y, 
something's wrong. | wish I had bı 
receiving PLAYBO п 1970, so 1 could 
. Would 
t a picture of Elaine from her 
ate pictorial? 


Don Fritz 

Jackson, Mississippi 

Glad to, Don. When we said Ma Vern 
had good genes, we weren't kidding. Just 


at cousin Elaine's chromo- 
somes. The Morton family is the best 
сизе we've seen [or cloning. 


THE REAL PAMELA 
Thank you for the pictorial of Pam- 
cla Sue Martin (PrAvnov, July). She's a 


; but T never really noticed 
it until I saw Dick Zimmı ап'з fine 
photography. 


Lee С. Montgomery 
Dallas, Texas 


Gentlemen, don't you know that 
zines such as yours are not supposed to 
show pictures of girly that are actually 
sexy? I refer to your photos of the lovely 
Pamela Sue Martin, Don't you know that 
such pictures as those can stir up certain 
emotions that are unchristian (probably 
un-Moslem and even un-Jewish, too)? 

Glenn Rice 
Missoula, Montana 


magazine, 
Sue Martin 
nto grace 


As avid readers of your fi 
we can easily say that Pame! 
is the most b al wor 
your pages in a long tin 

John D. Harmon 
Phillip Z. Wholl 
Gainesville, Florida 


The pictorial gave me some insight 
into а won I've always adored 
admired. It was a pleasure getting to 
know her a little better. ‘The photogra 
phy by Dick Zimmerman is also excel- 
lent. The idea of showing the subject 
partially clad is stimulating and sexy, yet 
still leaves something to the imagination, 
With someone such as Pamela Sue Mar- 
tin, it gives a pictorial a touch of class. 

D. Pierce 
San Francisco, California 


My compliments to Miss Martin for 
her decision to dispel her former ima 
Her beauty, talent and sophistication 
deserve much more attention. Her choice 
in magazines is also excellent; no other 
could have done her justic 

Ward Heinke 
Bay Village, Ohio 


ve three copies of the July 
The reason—Pamela Sue Martin, 
Ken Poole 
Fonthill, Ontario 


STRAIGHT MAN 

On page 207 of the July issue, in 
Playboy Polpourri, you report on repro- 
ductions of the three steel balls that 
Captain Queeg used in The Caine Mu- 
tiny. Well, here's what my copy of the 
book says: "Queeg brought out a couple 
of bright stecl ball bearings. He 
reached a shaking hand into his trousers 
and brought out the /wo steel balls." 
And during the court-martial, Dr. Bird 
testified. about Queeg's "rolling or rat- 
ting of two marbles. So пот where 
did the extra ball come? 
J- Michael Keupp 
Pawling, New York 

Sorry, Mike. That's just too easy. 
We're not going to bite. 


21978 R. J. Reynolds Tobacco Co. 


“жу 


| 
Warning: The Surgeon General Has Determined 
That Cigarette Smoking Is Dangerous to Your Health. 


tte thats 


P || Winston. 
AI taste. 


к 


(SEV 
ERNEUT 
Viris 


orae 


ИЯ 


PLAYBOY 


Early Times. Mix it up or keep it straighi 


Say hello to 

the Tomcat, 
America's 
peachiest new 
Sour. Brought to 
you live and in 
living color by 
Early Times and 
Bar-Tender's® 
Tomcat Instant Mix. 


The Atlanta Belle is 

so Incredibly smooth, 

itll ring your chimes. 

1 ог, Early Times, % ог. 
Green Creme de Menthe, 
34 oz. White Creme de 
Cacao, 1 oz. cream, 
shake with cracked ice. 


Adda little 

Early Times to 
cola and you've 
put two great 
American tastes 
in their place. 

A 91055. 


What, you've ` 


never sampled 
the sweet-sour 
delights of the 
Pussycat? Hurry, 
after all, you've 
only got nine 
lives! Another 
super Sour 
made with Early 
Times and 
Bar-Tender's* 
Instant 

Pussycat Mix. 


Let's get down to 
essentials. Early 
Times and soda. 
Or Early Times 
and water. With 
nothing between 
them but a few 
Icy cubes. 


know us is to love us. 


Вб or 80 Proof -fariy Times Distillery Co, Louisville Ky ЕТОС E 1978. 


PLAYBOY AFTER HOURS 


BUMPER BABBLE 


We had noticed them, too, these new- 
style bumper stickers on which sexi 
puns are played upon certain occup: 
tions. As in, PILOTS KEEP IT UP LONGER or 
MINERS DO TT DEEPER. What we had not 
noticed, however, was the extent to which 
this latest form of bumper babble has 
grown. Now, thanks to a California 
correspondent, this oversight has been 
corrected, and we happily share with you 
his collection of job-related bumper 
stickers spotted on West Coast highways: 


REPORTERS DO IT DAILY 

TENNIS PLAYERS GET GOOD DEPTH ON 
THEIR STROKES 

TRUCKERS CARRY BIG LOADS 

WATTERS SERVE IT PIPING HOT 

GOLFERS SWING A STIFF SHAFT 

TEACHERS DO IT WITH CLASS 

BAKERS HAVE HOT BUNS 

ACTORS DO IT ON CUE 

CAR SALESMEN ARE OVERUSED 

SERVANTS ENTER IN THE REAR 

MAILMEN DO IT WITH ZIP 

POLITICIANS DO IT CROOKED 

WATCHMAKERS DO IT FOR HOURS 

REAL-ESTATE, SALESMEN KNOW ALL THE 
PRIME SPOTS 

MUSICIANS USE THE RHYTHM METHOD 

TAILORS FIT JUST RIGHT 

EXECUTIVES HAVE LARGE STAFFS 

LIBRARIANS MAKE NOVEL LOVERS 


If our correspondent overlooked any, 
е do let us know. 


CROCKED COOKERY 


We quote verbatim the first two para- 
graphs of a recent press release from 
Random House publishers: 


n 


Random House announced today 
that one of the recipes in Woman's 
Day Crockery Cuisine by Sylvia 
Vaughn Thompson could cause a 
serious explosion. 

The recipe is for Silky Caramel 
Slices and appears on pages 230 and 
231 of the Random House cdition. 


If the recipe is followed, the con- 
densed-milk can could explode and 
shatter the lid and liner of the crock- 
ery cooker. Random House urges 
that the recipe be obliterated with 
crayon or black ink marker. It will 
be omitted from the book in any 
future reprints. 


If there are any cooks left around to 
buy them. 


EST ASIN PEST 


We used to think est (Erhard Seminars 
Training) was just another goofy but 
essentially harmless California cult/ 
therapy /philosophy | whatever, most 
ly remembered as the one that doesn't let 
you go to the bathroom. Lately, though, 
we've noticed that est has taken its lumps 
from some high-powered detractors 
Semi-Tough, a movie ostensibly about 
1, devoted most of its footage to 


foot 


satirizing an estlike outfit called Bi 
A National Institute of Mental Health 
study declared that est "simply scares 
[trainees] badly and impresses them with 
inscrutable Eastern philosophy that ca 
not be analyzed by them, considering 
their state during taining.” Science 
News concluded that “among the tangi- 
ble results now is a moderate cult of 
about 100,000 cst graduates who p 
proach life through cst maxims and 
communicate largely in est jargon. 

We found est's fiercest opposition, 
meanwhile, right in est’s back yard, San 
rancisco, where an organization called 
nest (ie, not est) is rapidly gaining 
momentum. "Est attracts lost souls who 
were thrown out of the nest too soon,” 
rperson Stuart Stein ("the name 
born with") told us. "We invite 
them to climb back in. But anyone who's 
suspicious of somebody selling advice 
might as well belong. 

“Est says, "What is is. Very heavy. For 
years, Popeye the Sailorman has been 
saying, "I yam what I yam and tha's all 
I yam. To us, est is merely psycho- 
logical canned spinach for the weak of 
mind and spirit. Est teaches people to 
get ‘it.’ Nest says that they have too much 
of it now. They need to get rid of it, 
giv 
for somebody else's. 

“By harnessing anti-est fecling, nest 
is becoming a powerful element in 
California politics. All the candidates 
welcome our support: We shout like pro- 
lifers, push like Iranian students, dress 
like gays and beam like Moonies. 


MORE ON SEX 


A 72-hour orgasm? We traced rumors 
of a woman capable of this astounding 
accomplishment to More University, a 
San Francisco-area commune 
been and 


n- 


t away, or at least exchange theirs 


that has 
teaching sex 
techniques for more than ten years. We 
stopped by one of its Oakland houses 
one recent evening to eat an artichoke 
and find out more about More Irom 


investigating 


28 


PLAYBOY 


30 


Carol Bussey, и у registrar and 
professor of Basic Sensuality. 

“We believe that everyone is a sensual 
being and that everyone comes equipped 
with the right tool kit," Bussey told us. 
"Unless your cock is less than half an 
inch, you can satisfy any female. Frigid- 
ity is a myth. Impotency is a myth. For 
nine years, we've been experimenting 
with how much sex a woman could con- 
sume. We got to one woman having a 
72-hour orgasm and still saying, "More, 
more, more.” Everyone's first reaction is 
to ask, "Isn't that exhausting?’ It’s not. 
It’s another myth that sex is tiring. If 
you're doing it right, sex is not tiring.” 

We wondered how the 72-hour lady 
managed to sustain herself for three 
straight days. "Let's use three hours rath- 
er than 72," said Bussey. “Seventy-two 
sounds too dramatic, The truth we 
have eight women who can come for 
three hours on command. It is measura- 
ble. It is repeatable. That's as scientific 
as we can get it. Three hours we can do 
any time. And every Saturday, we put 
оп a show where a man gets a woman 
off manually for an hour. 

“You really have to take our courses 
to understand how they do it. Women 
can have these experiences only if they 
enjoy their whole lives. Men are condi- 
tioned to get olf any way they can. With 
women, orgasms are harder to come by, 
so to speak. From what I've seen—and 
1 personally don't believe an orgasm 
until I sec it—women have to go 
through a mental as well as a. physical 
process to find a universe that is right 
enough to get off in. 

“The only thing men need for more 
sex is appetite. Physiologically, we can 
verily that semen is produced every 20 
minutes. There is no correlation be- 
tween semen production and hard-ons. 
A man can come with a hard cock or a 
soft cock. He can have a hard cock with- 
out semen or a hard cock with semen. 
It all depends on how turned on the 
woman is. Jf she wants it, she can get it. 

"Men are like hot sports cars: "They 
want somconc to red-line them, to take 
them farther than they'll take them- 
selves, because where they take them- 
selves is really dull. Our men weren't 
stupid. Once they found out the truth— 
that women want sex before they want 
a {ur coat or a house in suburbia—they 
put all their auention on sex, Other 
men are taught that if they give thei 
women enou 1 goods, they'll 
be happy. They're not and they don’t 
understand why; women aren't allowed 
to tell the truth about their bodies. 

“More was started by Victor Baranco, 
who had made a million dollars twice, 
had a wife, two kids—all society's terms 
for success at his beck and call—and it 
wasn't making him happy. He decided 
to form a society within society that was 


Torn 
have between 150 and 200 resident 
members; we have the best sex informa- 
tion in the world and we have just 
applied to be a universi 
“Victor handed us the blueprint for 
society will be like in the year 
2000. We're going in the same direction 
as everyone else, but we're grabbing on 
to it faster, We have jealousy handled, 
We have the 72-hour orgasm handled. 
We have sex handled, We have the how 
to-haye-children-and-still-be-happy prob- 
lem handled. Our only problem is that 
we don't have time to write about this 
stuff, because we're doing it so Last.” 
Whew! 


CHECKING IN 


Scott Cohen interviewed Nudie, de- 
signer to the rhinestone-cowboy stars of 
showbiz, at the latter's offices in Los 
Angeles. 

PLAYBOY: Have cowboy styles changed 
over the years? 
nupie: If Tom Mix got outa his grave 


and seen what we're makin’, he would go 
back into his grave. It's too flashy. Too 
loud. When we first got into the busi- 
ness, we were just making cowboy clothes 
with piping, and finally we got into 
where it was a litle diferent and the 
boys began to like it. Now it's outa sight, 
you know. 

PLAYBOY; Was Hank Wi 
a Nudie suit? 

nupte: Yes, he was. Now we do all his 
kid's stull. 

PLaynoy: How much are your suits? 
NUDIE: We start at $175 and go up. 
PLAYBOY: What was the most expensive 
suit you ever made? 

мине; Elvis Presley's gold-lamé suit cost 
$10,000. 
PLAYBOY: What w 
NUDIE: 59500. 


SPACE CYCLE 


Last February, Robert Truax, the man 
whose Skycycle sent Evel Knievel into 
the Snake River Canyon, rolled a new 
bird out of агора, California, 
shop. The ci dubbed Volksrocket 
the centerpiece of Operation Pri. 
atc Enterprise, a million-dollar attempt 
to send the world’s first private astronaut 
on а no-frills suborbital space flight by 
mid- 1980. 

The 25-foot, oncand-a-half-ton Volks- 
rocket was assembled trom a menagerie 
of surplus guided-missile components at 
а cost of 575,000. Its four Atlas vernier 
eng 000 pounds’ thrust оп 
a diet of kerosene and liquid oxygen, 
enabling the rocket to loft a 190-pound 
pa titude of 54 miles and 
attain speeds in excess of 2500 mph. A 
Spartan "astronaut compartment" in the 
vehicle's nose has been fitted w a 
form-fitti ‚а small fttype 
oxygen system and three large viewports. 
An autopilot system will keep the craft 
on its preprogrammed trajectory. 

Truaxs astronaut will have a pa 
Jever at his finger tips to separate the 
psule from the booster s 
vehicle, should his courage or a 
component fail. A twos 
system will slow the Space Cycle to 
survivable splashdown speed after re- 
entry. 

This past summer, the craft underwent 
engine tests at Reaction Research 
ute test facilities near Sacramento, 
Alter calibrating the vehicle's 
engines, Trus 


liams buried in 


your profit? 


X3, 


nes develop 


iro 


em performance. 

pout acquiring an air- 
certificate for the craft 
by the FAA for all passenger- 
in the U.S), 
There prob- 


(required 

mying a 
ruax laughed , 
n't anyone at the FAA knowledge- 
nough to inspect the thing,” 


The man’s all legs and 
knows everything about leet. 
Listen: 

“Boots have to look great — 
but they also have to be made 
for whatever youre going to 
bedoing in them. That's why, 
when you say boots, you gotta 
say Dingo? 

Like O.J. Simpson, we 
mean what we say, and what 
we say is: Nobody Puts 
Leather Together Like Dingo. 

Now, Dingo puts together 
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32 


(making Here Comes Mr. Jordan as 
Р updated romantic fantasy called 
Heaven Can Wait sounded like a terrible 
idea when the announcement came out, 
but maybe Warren Beatty knows some- 
thing the rest of us don't. He engineered 
Bonnie and Clyde and Shampoo into 
being, which helped put him where he 
today—and he's way up there. Beatty's 
reer should climb into even higher 
orbit with Heaven Can Wait. He pro- 
duced it, stars in it, codirected it (with 
Buck Henry), helped write it (with 
Elaine May, no les). Who did what, 
exactly, would be tough to determine, 
but they must have been doing some- 
thing right to produce a supernatural 
love story as bright, witty and engaging 
any movie to appear so far in 1978. 
Some changes have been made—and 
mostly for the better, if memory serves— 
in the 1941 hit that starred Robert Mont- 
gomery as a prize fighter who dies before 
his scheduled time and is sent back to 
earth, only to discover that his remains 
have been cremated. With the help of 
Claude Rains (as Mr. Jordan, a celestial 
major-domo), Montgomery had to shop 
around for another body in which to 
spend the 50 years still owed. him. Es- 
sentially the same plot serves for Beatty, 
who's now star quarterback for the Los 
Angeles Rams instead of a boxer. When 
he finds himself en route to heaven or 
wherever—confronted by James Mason, 
as a Mr. Jordan second to none, and 
Buck Henry, as an embarrassed Escort 
who has goofed on his timing—he is 
deeply indignant. "Cremated?" he pro- 
tests. "Well, I'm starting against Dallas 
on Sunday!" The deceased but undead 
athlete, Joc Pendleton, ultimately chooses 
a temporary abode in the body of a con- 
servative industrial tycoon who's about 
to be murdered by his conniving wife 
(Dyan Cannon) and his male private 
secretary (Charles Grodin). Subsequent 


t English girl 
who captivates Farnsworth the industrial- 
when she demands that his company 
abandon plans to build а refinery that 
would destroy her native village. Mason, 
Henry, Cannon, Grodin, Jack Warden 
and Vincent Gardenia all contribute gen- 
crously to a movie that bounces along 
with a very relaxed, old-fashioned air. 
Heaven Can Wait is alive and. well and 
may gi isticated comedy a fresh 
start. 


. 


All those lurid, colorful characters and 
some of those big memorable scenes 
from Casablanca are spoofed in Neil 
Simon's The Cheap Detective (he never tips 
taxi drivers), which does double duty as 


Beatty in Heaven Can Wait. 


A beatific Beatty, 
achintzy Cheap Detective 
and some Greasy kid stuff. 


+ _ 
Channing, Сосо and Falk in Detective. 


a roughshod parody of every private-cye 
melodrama in the archives. Simon could 
easily have knocked off this one during 
a long weekend in Malibu. The humor 
of the piece is hardly top-drawer: Woody 
Allen did it better in Play It Again, Sam, 
yet Cheap Detective is at least twice as 
funny as Simon's Murder by Death, 
which left me with a frozen smile at 
best. Peter Falk, with his Humphrey 
t imitation revved up in the title 
role, sleuths around "a fictional city 
named San Francisco, 7000 miles from 
Casablanca.” He scours the underworld, 


с we came 
time when 
The time is 


love in 

the world was innocent. 
World War Two, and Falk's private eye 
seems destined to hear hair-raising sexual 
exploits from every dame he meets. / 
Margret, Madeline Kahn, Eileen Bren- 
nan, Stockard Channing, Marsha Mason 


and Louise Fletcher are the principal 
damsels in distress, with such funnymen 
d straight men as James Coco, Sid 
Caesar, Nicol Williamson and John 
Houseman providing distress in several 
flattering shades. Funniest bit is Falk's en- 
counter with Caesar and Ann-Margret, as 
a suspicious couple named Ezra and Jeze- 
bel Dezire, though there are choice bits 
throughout. Director of photography 
John A. Alonzo has his own thing go- 
ing, with a brilliant visual parody of the 
period, and Dave Grusin's music incor- 
porates а lushly romantic orchestration 
of an oldy called Jeepers Creepers, an 
apt substitute for As Time Goes By 
when Falk and Fletcher go into their 
Bogey-Bergman routines. Every murder 
victim, apparently subject to instant 
rigor mortis, dies standing up. There's 
no reason for any of this. Cheap Detec- 
tive will fade faster than your suntan but 
brightens up the silly season, just the 
same. 


. 

There is no chance that Creese will 
slow down the John Travolta 
on. While Travolta has charism 


to burn, 
he also needs all the star power he can 
muster to rise above the general medioc- 


rity of this flat filmization of Broad- 
ways phenomenal hit mus its 
original energy dissipated by fledgling 
director Randal Kleiser. vase 15 over- 
done, chaotically photographed, poorly 
paced and often downright dull for any 
moviegoer over the age of 15. To share 
the burden with Travolta, his costar 
Olivia Newton-John and Stockard Chan- 
ning demonstrate their versatility and 
ooze talent from every pore—though both 
ladies look somewhat over the hill to be 
playing high school chicklets back in the 
Filties. Sha-Na-N. i 
rock group called Johnny Casino а 
Gamblers, with Frankie alon ca 
Teen Angel, who sings the showstop- 
ping Beauty School Dropout to Didi 
Conn (one of the shrillest new comedi- 
ennes, best known for last year’s slecper 
You Light Up My Life, though her sing- 
ing was dubbed). Still т ing on Broad- 
way, Grease on film ain't got rhythm, 
ain't got roots and raises sticky questions 
as to why a bunch of high school kids 
who started out as Chicagoans in the 
play but seem to have been transported 
to Los Angeles in the film should speak 
with Noo Yawk accents and generally be- 
ауе like the Lords of Flatbush. With- 
out Travolta as an anticoagulant, Grease 
would be Fifties nostalgia with the con- 
sistency of pure glop. 
. 

While Grease covers the Fifties, look- 
ing back at the tumultuous Sixtics is 
the "in" thing for youth movies. Much 
of the brainless pap that’s churned out 


t as 


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lays makes me feel that no one 
the age of 20 should be allowed 
into the theater unless accompanied. by 
an adolescent. Writer-director John 
Milius’ Big Wednesday, a solemn hymn to 
his own youth as part of the California 
surfing scene, offers an entirely different 
kind of problem. Anything but frivolous, 
the movie is nonetheless a total wipe-out 
except for 15 or so minutes of first-rate 
surf footage with stars Jan-Michael Vin- 
cent, William Katt and Gary Busey on 
the boards, plus fleeting glimpses of such 
contemporary surf kings as Gerry Lopez 
The rest of it, a collaboration between 
Milius (а Wunderkind screenwriter who 
turned to directing in Dillinger and The 
Wind and the Lion) and co-author Den: 
nis Aaberg, follows three close friends 
through a decade of growing up. While 
Vietnam and race riots rage around them, 
they get married, get jobs, go to war or 
dodge the draft, and reunite periodically 
to dream their boyish dreams of an awe 
some Big Wave, It always seems to come 
on a Wednesday, according to a surf bum 
and semimystic named Bear (Sam Mel 
ville) who plays guru to the threesome 
Nothing works when Milius gets more 
than an inch away from the water, De- 
ıuse he studies the social and. psycho- 
logical aspects of surfing with such heavy 
reverence that you'd think these ne'er- 
de J sun gods were nembers of an 
obscure Tibetan r lous order. The 
are pranksters without humor, dropouts 
so shallow that you don’t much care how 
or whether or not they drop in again 
When they meet as if by instinct on the 
historic Big Wednesday, having lost track 
of one another for several years, they 
carry their boards down to the sea with- 
out so much as a hello—in a moment 
ıhats plainly meant to be cosmic but 
comes off affected and artsy, All three 
male stars are personable cnough to de- 
light their fan clubs, though everyone 
else is likely to nod olf between waves. 
To catch Buseys act in depth, see The 
Buddy Holly Story. 
. 

Moving right along from sociology 
on a surfboard to unabashed. slapstic 
National Lampoon's Animal House takes the 
blue ribbon. Never mind the fine points: 
There are no fine points, exactly, in 
this bawdy broadside spoof directed by 
John Landis as if higher education were 
synonymous with low comedy. One of 
the film's three authors is Dartmouth 
graduate Chris Miller, who must have 
contributed some of the raunchier de- 

ls about fraternity life back in 1962 
(valuable research for his collaborators, 
ex-rLAYBOY staller Harold Ramis and 
Douglas Kenney, in сизе they had 
foolishly frittered away their school days 
mastering liberal arts). The Delta 
pledges and upperclassmen in Animal 
House all seem to be majoring in pills, 
pot, brawls and sex. Tim Matheson, 
Thomas Hulce and James Daughton lead 


Fun & games in Animal House. 


Belushi rescues an uneven 
Animal House, while 
Busey shines as Buddy Holly. 


Busey as Buddy Holly. 


the revels, and are often riotous, though 
mumero uno as a scene stealer is Saturday 
Night Live's irrepressible John Belusl 
Whether he's climbing a ladder to peek 
at topless coeds or bemoaning his expul- 
sion for achieving an unprecedented 
ide point average of 0.0 ("Seven years 
of college down the drain!"), Belushi is 
consistently hilarious im an irreverent, 
wobbly, semiliterate, intentionally sopho- 
moric farce that might have been con- 
cocted during a panty raid or a drunken 
homecoming weekend. It ain't what 
you'd call comedy cum laude, but Ani- 
mal House is sure to become required 
viewing for multitudes of Lampoon 
Junatics and friends of John Belushi 
D 

Two kilos of hashish figure impor- 
tantly in Midnight Express, a harrowing 
dramatization of the reallife nightmare 
endured by Billy Hayes, a Babylon, 
Long Island, student who was sentenced 
to long-term imprisonment in a Turkish 
jail for trying to smuggle hash out of 


Istanbul. The time was 1970, when the 
U.S, and Turkey were crossing diplo 
matic swords over Cyprus—a polit 
nuance beyond the ken of Hayes, who 
simply planned to board an airplane 
with some dope strapped to his body so 
he could sell it to friends back 
After his escape some six years later 
(the title is prison jargon for a break 
out), Hayes and William Hoffer wrote 
a blow-by-blow account of the abuses he 
had suffered—brutal beatings, homosex- 
ual assaults, mental and physical torture 
that would kill any man, or turn. him 
into а beast bent on survival. Oliver 
Stone's screenplay, masterfully directed 
by Alan Parker (whose Bugsy Malone 
was a featherweight take-off on 
еріс, with kids playing all the parts), 
captures the full horror of it in a 
movie thats short on entertainment 
values—harsh and unrelentingly real 
tic throughout—but admirable as ап 
ode to stubborn. human. indomitability 
inst apparently hopeless odds. 

When Midnight Express had its world 
premiere at the Cannes festival, there 
were quibbles in some quarters about 
the movie's "racism" in depicting 
Haves's Turkish jailers as cruel one- 
dimensional demons (he does, in fact, 
publicly denounce them as “pigs” in a 
nation that deplores eating pork). How- 
ever, it doesn't whitewash the inequities 
of our own prison system to dramatize 
the injustice done to a young Amcricin 
whose punishment was far more heinous 
than his sappy juvenile crime. Such cases 
are common- just ask any pot smoker 
who has ever been clapped into a grisly 
Mexican jail for possessing a couple of 
joints. In the role of Hayes, clean-cut 
Brad Davis (a newcomer in the James 
Dean tradition, with prestigious TV 
credits from Sybil and Roots) makes his 
first feature film a strong bid for instant 
stardom—straightforward and credible 
т a wide range of emotionally 
charged scenes, as when he runs amuck 
and mutilates a vicious guard by biting 
off his tongue, or when his girlfriend 
(Irene Miracle) arrives from the States 
for a visit and he tearfully masturbates 
while she presses her breasts DUE 
plate-glass dividing wall. Randy 
John Hurt and Paul Smith lend E 
ic support in an abrasive, disquieting 
movie, further enhanced by Giorgio 
Moroder's unique musical score, which 
sneaks up on you like а coronary sei 
zure. Easy it ain't, but Midnight Express 
is not to be missed. 


hom 


б 

As musical biographies go, The Buddy 
Holly Story is a toe-tapping wonder, rich 
and rhythmic and as American as apple 
pie in tribute to the short happy life 
of Holly—an carly rock^n^roller. who 
died in a plane crash in 1959 at the age 
of 22. Some 45 hit songs, many of them 
still revived regularly, were Holly's leg- 
acy, though his professional career lasted 


35 


PLAYBOY 


36 


scarcely three years. This down-home 
genius from Lubbock, Texas, seems а 
deeply nostalgic figure now, when rock 
stars tend to be identified with drugs 
and groupies. Holly loved one girl (his 
widow, Maria Elena, charmingly played 
by N d was an exem- 
play young ccording to this 
authorized bio, which avoids sentimental 
slosh to concentrate on musical evolu- 
tion and. character development. In the 
title role, Cary Busey does his g- 
ing as mover and shaker of Buddy Holly 
and the Crickets—with Don Stroud 
and Charles Martin Smith showing equal 
musicianship and all-round talent as the 
drummer and the bass man of a trio 
that broke the color barrier and became 
the first white group to play Harlem's 
Apollo Theater. They were so damned 
good, everyone expected them to be 
black. Busey's pe 
ple and unassuming on the surface, the 
skill of it scarcely shows—and th: 
talent. The Buddy Holly 
good vibes and gets under your skin— 
under mine, at any rate—because direc- 
tor Steve Rash, in his feature-film debut, 
is quite clearly performing a labor of 
Jove, not just cranking out a flashy com- 

mercial showpiece. 
REVIEWS BY BRUCE WILLIAMSON 

. 

богу Busey, ап cighl-year veteran of TV 
and movies, suddenly finds himself one 


of the hottest young actors in Holly- 
wood. Major—and starilingly different— 
roles in the films “Straight Time," “Big 
Wednesday” and, especially, “The Bud- 
dy Holly Story," in which Busey single- 
handedly lights up the screen as the 
horn-rimmed rock"n'-voller from Texas, 
have opened up a world of options for 
the personable, energetic 34-year-old. 
Busey, who did his own vocals and guitar 
playing for “Holly,” is as at home at a 
rock concert as he is on a movie set. 
As a drummer, he has toured with Leon 
Russell and Willie Nelson; and a gold 
record of Leon’s “Will œ the Wisp” 
album hangs on the wall of his home 
near Los Angeles, where writer Tom 
Nolan caught up with him recently. 
лувоу: Where are you from, Gary? 

BU: Goose Creek, Texas, is where I 
was born. Goose Creek, Texas, on Black 
Duck Bay, where the mosquitoes are so 
big they wear khaki pants and rope 
penders; where the roaches march 
formation. I grew up in Tulsa. Middle- 
class Oklahoma in the Fifties; what an 
uptight time that was, I spent most of 
my time shining the lockers, man, stayin’ 
out of the way of the big guys. They 
used to have crowbar fights. The first 
thought that went through my mind 
when the bell rang was, God, I hope 1 
make it home without gettin’ depantsed, 


or beat up, or hı 
me. 

PLAYBOY: When did you get out of there? 
uusty: In 1962, I went to college up 
North, in Kansas, to play football. Got 
a dramatic scholarship after my knees 
played out. I was playin’ drums in a 
band, too. We'd make 5300 a weekend, 
at Oklahoma State University, then we'd 
come out here to L.A, 
time. Our first night hac 
played a place in 
Canoga à Go Go. It boa 
longest bar in the 
Behind the bar was 
with platini ad a balcony t 
would have made Carol Doda close her 
eyes. Rhinestone pasties that looked like 
hubcaps. She'd dance to hits from the 
jukebox durin’ our breaks. The clientele 
there were mostly your fillin’station gu 
lumberyard guys, mechanics, b 
such. Our first night, our first s 
90 people settin' right in front, we're 
playin’ Sometimes Good Guys Don't 
Wear White, by The Standells, and, for 
no apparent reason, all at once every- 
body starts fightin’. The ol’ girl behind 
the bar, she's di herself off with a big 
beach towel, she hollers at us, “Keep on 
playin'!" Two guys who look like they're 
from the University of Mars move in, 
dust everybody olf, and pretty soon 
there's not a soul in the place; every- 


paint thrown on 


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body's outside, beatin’ the pulp out of 
cach other. We played four hours and 
got paid 50 bucks. My first taste of show- 
biz in the town. 

PLAynoy: How did you get into acting? 
nusev: 1 moved out here permanently 
in "6B, and 1 met a guy named James 
Best, who taught me how to work in front 
of a cam Fd majored in theatrical 
art at school, but he told me you can't 
teach acting. You can teach history of 
the theater, but you can't tell a. person 
how to feel. Jimmy taught you to have 
your technical chops down, to hit your 
marks and find your key light, to know 
the frame line is. my Best 
Boot Camp is what 1 used to call it. He'd 
never pat you on the back. He'd get in 
your hip pocket and just chew you up 
until you learned. Id get so frustrated 
Га be in tears, four o'clod the mom. 


' me. He told me I didn't hav 
АП you have to do is 
Let the 


the director point you and steer you. Be 
unconscious of yourself. You're just a 
vehicle. Open yourself ир” He taught 
me from the heart. I couldn't even al- 
ford to pay the guy. My wife, Judy, was 
workin’ to support us while I lear 
all about this avision мий. Then I 
got my first TV job in 1970, on The 
High Chaparral: hitting somebody in the 


face with a stick while they was sleepin’. 
PLAYnoY: But you got more challenging 
things to do after that, didn't you? 
позву: Yeah, we did two and a hall y 
of some pretty extensive stuff before I 
hung up my TV shoes to go and play 
drums with Leon Russell for a while. T 
got to do some wonderful TV movies, 
including The Law and The Execution 
of Private Slovik. 1 did a unique series, 
The Texas Wheelers, 1 got to be the 
last guy to die on Gunsmoke, 1 worked 
with Bobby Blake and Strother Martin 
and MacKenzie Phillips in a Ватейа. lus 
all who you mect and what vou can take. 
IE vou make yourself desperate and 
vulnerable when you work, your com. 
municition lines seem to be much more 
open. 

rLAYBOY: What do you mean by "des 
perate 

BUSE 


nd vulnerable"? 
You know how you feel when the 
adrenaline’s runnin’ through your body? 
Just before the kickoff. Just before the 
gun that starts the race. Just before 
goes up, before they say, 
lrenaline. all 
the time, running through you so you 
can tap it, How do you get that? You're 
1, you're on edge. 
. whether it’s saving 


rLaynoy: How does that apply to your 
recent movies? 


BUSEY 
Time. 1 stayed depressed all the ti 
was hard to keep myself in that place. I 


the hardest working day of my life. 
I've never been pumped so hard by an 
other actor offcamera as | was by Dustin 
- He had me to the point of 
He just kept makin' small 
on ith 


on it! Don't let it out! 
1 couldn't stop sobbing. 
work on that edge of emot 
I's like working with nitroglycerin. 
‘That's the substance 1 wor ; that's 
my clay. 

Then I went into Big Wednesday. 
lost 35 pounds. My waist went from 
to 31. Гуе been an athlete all my life, 
but in three months’ work with Vince 
Gironda at Vince's Gym in North Holly- 
about nutrition 
than Td ever 
ing how to surf! 
ncent and 1 spent three 
ш with Gerry Lopez 
the finest surler in the w 
es on the side of a 
Camp, Jan and I called it, We slept 
on the floor, with no heat. Gerry woke us 


ed ol. 
ichael 


opinion, 
Hel 


37 


PLAYBOY 


38 


every morning to observe the sunrise. 
"Then he would grind coffee beans. We'd 
have coffee and then go out to the most 
difficult spot he could find. My first day 
of surfing—in my life!—was on Honolua 
Bay. The waves were breakin’ at 
fect and they were movin’ like locomo: 
tives. What am I doin’ here? I've never 
been so scared in my life, layin’ on a 
board out in that water. I had the crash 
course! But with the best guys in the 
world. 

OK, that was Big Wednesday: For 

that, I had short blond hair and was 
built like a stallion. 1 go right into 
The Buddy Holly Story off the maxi- 
mum definition diet, cut out the protein, 
go to low carbohydrates, smooth out the 
body, ‘cause Holly didn't have any mus- 
cular situation goin’ on. Lost more 
weight, down to about 160. They cut 
my hair real close, gave me three per- 
manents and dye jobs, curled it every 
day. Glasses. By that time, I didn't know 
who the fuck I was when I looked in 
the mirror. But that was good! "Cause it 
put me farther away from myself, Gary 
Busey was nowhere around, which made 
me even more desperate and vulnerable, 
Our friends out in Tulsa, in Goose 
Creek, in Kansas City and Dubuque— 
when they see a guy up on that screen 
who's not lip-svncing, who's really play- 
ing and singing live and is scared to 
death, they're seeing something that's 
beyond acting. It's like watching an ап 
mal or a baby, and the audience knows 
subconsciously that that animal is not 
goin’ by any script; it may do anything! 
There's an excitement goin’ on, ап un- 
known aspect. I like to have that aspect 
when I'm working. The movie was done 
on а shoestring, so the rock-’n'-roll clause 
was in effect, which means the clock 
doesn’t stop. You don't go to bed. 1 was 
totally, completely Buddy Holly, all the 
time, But it took another two mov 
their drive and intensity, to get me to 
that level 
PLAYBOY: How do you feel about all the 
attention you're getting now? 
BUSEY: It’s hard to have any feeling. 
АП these fantasies you've had are start- 
ing to manifest themselves in the 
physical world. And, uh, all I can say is 
Wow! Dublya, oh, dublya! Whoever in- 
vented that word knew what he was 
talkin’ about. It's like being in the сус 
of a hurricane, Its like lightning striking. 
To be going along for eight years and 
then, all of a sudden, have this happen. 
I just realized a couple of days ago, I'm 
not in control of anything. 1 didn't plan 
any of this. 1 think one of the rules of 
show business js that there are no rules. 
105 like rock "n' roll. It's a real high 
point now and, at the same time, it’s a 
low point, ‘cause you think, Now what? 
But I like both those feclings. I like liv- 
ing on the edge. That's about all there is 
to it: to live out on the edge. 


XRATED 


ро, or steal- 
ing from the 
classics to inject 
some quality into 
the standardized 
hump and grind 
of hard-core films, 
has become S.O.P. 
for porno ped- 
dlers, Writer-pro- 
ducer-director 
Kenneth Schwartz 
openly acknowl- 
edges that Fiona on 
Fire owes a lot to 
Laura, the glossy 
1944 thriller with 
Gene Tierney as 
the mysterious 


Fiona: Laura, with sex. 


Porn) and turns 
out to be a kind 
of penis Вугар 
Íor curious cus- 
tomers. Why this 
collage of erotic 
fantasies is titled 
Het Cookies is 
anybody's guess, 
though the girls 
are yummier thin 
usual and there 
are choice, tart- 
ly seasoned bits 
spilling from a 
pornocopia of fa- 
miliar blue-movie 
notions. A couple 
of improper Vic- 


beauty, supposed- 
ly murdered, who 
nevertheless ех, 
uded such allure 
that detective Da- 
na Andrews fell 


Sylvester Stall 


Fiona on Fire apes Laura; 
Hot Cookies boasts a 


torian misses do 
their usual thing: 
ап arist gets 
lucky at the beach 
with a sun-baked 
Danish dish. More 


lone double. 


hopelessly in love — — 
with her. Fiona 
has pretty much 
the same plot: a 
missing girl; a 
smitten detective 
(Sam Dean stand- 
ing in for An- 
drews); a woman's 
dead body, face 
blown away; mis- 
taken identity. 
What's been 
added, of course, 
is graphic sex. 
Fiona in flash- 
backs, with some 
of her closest asso- 
ciates caught from 
time to time fia- 
grante deliclo, As 


interesting is a 
Rocky rip-off dom- 
inated by an 
ersatz Italian stal- 
lon who looks 
strikingly like Syl- 
vester Stallone, 
though his gym 
workouts tend to 
emphasize muscle 
tone below the 
belt. Best of show, 
again, is Abiga 
Clayton (alo in 
New Girls of 
Porn) as а slum- 
ming socialite 
who cruises 
around in a 
limo—picking up 
and discarding 


such things go, men as if she w 
it's a superior job uying on hats. 
of plagiarizing a Hard hats. 
time-tested story, . 


erotic and provoc- 
ative. The weak k is Fiona herself, 
played by former Playboy Bunny Amber 
Hunt (ee The New Girls of Porn in our 
July 1977 issue), who happens to be dead 
wrong for the part, Amber is feisty, shape- 
ly and sexy in the manner of а precocious 
baby sitter who just might make out with 
the man of the house. But haunting mys- 
tery is not her bag, which diminishes 
Fiona on Fire so drastically that Schwartz 
might have been wiser to call it Z 
Dreamed I Was a Teenaged “Laura.” 
А 

Some paintings come to life in the 
back room of a sex shop that features а 
resident sorceress (Serena BlaqueLord, 
also one of rLAvsov's 1977 New Girls of 


Pseudo Sly in Hot Cookies. 


To establish the 
tone of Little Girls Blue, a rigid pristine 
penis looms upon the screen like that 
monolithic slab from 2001. Phallus wor 
ship, it turns out, is the most. popular 
subject with students at a boarding 
school for nubile girls. Tamara Morgan 
and К. C. Winters, as Kathy and Misty, 
are the belles of the balling in this 
smooth West Coast quickie directed. by 
Joanna Williams, a lady obviously well 
acquainted with the curriculum. Coach 
Fowler (Ken Cotton) and biology teach 
er Mr. Barrett (Paul Thomas, who por 
trayed a saint in the film version of Jesus 
Christ. Superstar) ave the girls" chief sex 
objects, either in fact or in fantasy. We 
give Lillle Girls a passing grade. —n.w. 


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TELEVISION 


reviews: The new TV season will sce 
the launching of 21 weekly series en- 
tries when the annual network battle for 
prime-time supremacy begins on Mon- 
ау, September 11, Scheduled are comedy 
and iniseries, tele 


ariety shows, 


novels and the usual choice of F 
imports in Public Broadcasting’s classy 
cultural ghetto. 

ABC Television has such a host of 


returning hits that only five new series 
are slated to scare hell out of the opposi- 
tion. Battle Star: Galactica will star Lorne 
Greene as commander of a space ship 
5 а long way from Bonanza, with 
high hopes of becoming the TV equiv- 
alent of Siar Wars. There's also ап un- 
earthly touch of comedy afoot in Merk 
& Mindy, with Robin Williams as a 
visitor from the planet Ork, enjoying 
close encounters with Dawber, a 
wholly terrestrial charmer named Mindy, 
Texi and Vega$ will explore, respec- 
tively, the world of New York cabbies 
and America’s gambling capital, where a 
tough private eye (played by Bob UL 
rich) takes on all kinds of trouble with 
tongue in cheek. So what else is new? 
ABC's Apple Pie features Rue McClana- 
han (Maude's neighbor) as a lady who 
hires a family of eccentrics to cheer her 
up during the Depression and maybe 
keep up with The Waltons of CBS. 

The NBC roster is subject to last- 
minute changes under the watchful eye 
of new president and programing genius 
Fred Silverman, after his defection from 
ABC-TV. Likely to survive is another 
Vegasbased series, Who's Watching the 
Kids?, about a couple of local ladies 
and their young kim. If that gamble 
doesn't pay off, NBC-TV at least 
seven other contenders, including Lifeline, 
a daring prime-time documentary series 
about the private and professional lives 
of doctors, with real medicine men play- 
ing themselves; The Woverly Wonders, star- 
ring Broadway Joe Namath as a high 
school basketball coach plagued by a 
hopeless team and an ble p 
cipal (Gwynne Gilford); Sword of Justice, 
with Dack Rambo as an ex-con who 
assumes a double life—as a “Tennis, 
one?" gadabout by day, a modern Zorro 
righting wrongs by night; WEB. will 
uy to go Network one better with its 
portrait of a dynamic lady TV execu- 
tive (Pamela Bellwood), presumably the 
crusty but benign chief of specialevents 
programing; Grandpa Goes to Washington 
stars veteran character actor Jack Albert- 
son as 1 codger getting into poli- 
tics; Capra brings us newcomer Vincent 
Baggetta as an antr-establishment lawyer; 
and Dick Clerk's Шуе Wednesday promises 
to be unpredictable but is probably ex- 
actly what you think it is. An upcoming 


Bates in Casterbridge. 


Attack of the Giant 

iseries: new Roots, 
Michener's Centennial 
and Alan Bates in PBS’ 

The Mayor of Casterbridge. 


series called Coastocoost—with Linda 
Watkins and Melanie Griffith as naugh- 
ty stewardesses aboard a transcontinen- 
tal jetliner—has reportedly been shelved 
by Silverman, at least until midseason. 
Still aloft at CBS, the airborne Flying 
High will have three sweet young things 
(Pat Klous, Connie Sellecca and Kath- 
ryn Witt) fetching for 
similar in-flight fun and games. The 
boys at CBS will also mine their own 
back yards with a couple of TV new 
researchers, Priscilla Barnes and Debra 
in The American Girls. Althoug! 
s no way of knowing who was first 
in this game of pilfered TV packages, 
CBS has still another crusading lawyer 
who earned his law degree behind 
its called Kaz and Ron Liebman h: 
the title role. Evidently cribbed from 
old and fairly recent movies аге The Poper 
Chase, with John Houseman as a crusty, 
notso-benign law professor making Ше 
hell for his studeni 
costa 


dust the Beginning, 
ng McLean Stevenson and Pris- 
cilla Lopez as Father Cleary and Sister 
Agnes, getting laughs in the name of 
God in an inner-city storefront mission. 
Had enough? There's more inside stuff 
to come from WKRP in Cincinnati, designed 
to harvest antic hay from what happens 
when a down-at-the-heels radio station 
switches to a rock'n'roll format. Mary 
Tyler Moore also tries a new format 
in Mery, a standard variety hour; then 


there's CBS’ hopeful cighth wonder, 
People, featuring hostess Phyllis George 
with a TV magazine full of glamor and 
gossip. 

б 

A glance ahead at the big dramatic 
specials in store for the 1978-1979 sea- 
son appears to give ABC а slight edge, 
with Roots: The Next Generations imminent 
a 14-hour sequel to Alex Haley's histor- 
ic blockbuster, and Ike, a six-hour drama 

pout General Dwight Eisenhower's war 
years, with Robert Duvall starred oppo- 
site Lee Remick (who does not play Ma- 
s Weaver, Angie Dickinson, 
Robert Wagner, Lesley Ann Warren and 
World War Two figure prominently in 
Pearl, another six-hour ABC epic set 
against the explosive backdrop of Pearl 
Harbor around December 7, 1941. 
"Those who prefer gilded trash to apoca- 
lyptic upheavals can just watch for The 
Users, a two-hour ABC-TV movie adapt- 
cd from Joyce Haber's junky Hollywood 
novel, with Jaclyn Smith, Tony Curtis, 
Joan Fontaine, Michelle Phillips and 
George Hamilton impersonating the 
power elite in Tinseltown. NBC's major 
effort for 1978-1979, of course, will be 
its 25-hour adaptation of Centennial, the 
monumental James Michener novel that 
covers cons in the life of a Colorado 
town, with a galaxy of players headed 
by Richard Chamb n, Raymond 
Burr, Barbara Carrera, Sally Kellerman 
and Chief Dan George. Other major 
miniseries in the works at NBC-TV. 
Beggar Man, Thief (a sequel 10 Irwin 
Shaw's Rich Man, Poor Man); Backstairs 
at the White House (cight hours of revela- 
tions about our First Families from Taft 
through Eisenhower); A Women Called 
Moses (Cicely Tyson in a biography of 
Harriet Tubman); plus lengthy novels 
on TV from Aldous Huxley's Brave New 
World, Louisa May Alcott’s Little Women, 
James Jones's From Here to Etornity and 
James T. Farrell's Studs Lonigon. You 
E у they're not trying. 

. 

As usual, the bulk of material avail- 
able for prescreening and review come: 
from PBS. Top of the new season's 
highlights appears to be Masterpiece 
Theatre's seven-part. series The Mayor of 

a brilliant actor 
currently brightening up movie marquees 
as the favorite mate of dn Unmarried 
Woman, plays the title role in this liter- 
ate, gorgeously filmed adaptation of a 
‘Thomas E ly perennial. Bates's Dris- 
tling Mayor is a man whose fate is sealed 
forever by a cruel and senseless trans- 
gression during his youth—when he 
drunkenly auctions off his wife and in- 
fant daughter at a county fair. The bar- 
gain sticks, the wages of sin are bitter 


4l 


PLAYBOY 


42 


and Bates creates a fascinating portrait 
of a man whose entire life seems to be 
an act of slow suicide. To watch Caster- 
bridge is like curling up by the fire, week 
fter week, with a long-neglected book. 
б 

lmed in France and id, Marie 
Curie stars Jane Lapotaire with a superior 
English cast in a tasteful five-hour bio- 

ical epic about the world's most 
ted woman scientist, discoverer 
adium and recipient of two Nobel 
Prizes. What we didn't know from early 
exposure to Greer Garson's formula Hol- 
lywood bio of 1943, Madame Curie, was 
that the same Polish-born Frenchwoman 
figured in a couple of scandalous love 
пз and was a stubborn, unorthodox 


feminist who refused to the end to admit 
ii 


1 radioactivity might be dangerous to 
ne's health (though it probably killed 
Sharp personal insights, plus popu- 
r science deftly disguised as history 
make Marie Curie credible and dram 
cally potent in an unassuming way. 

. 

Coproduced by BBC television апа 
Time-Life Video under a grant from 
Xerox, The Long Search features Ronald 
Eyre—a British playwrightdirector who 
appears to be play-acting the kind of 
host role usually assigned to Kenneth 
Clark or Alistair Cooke—in a cursory 
but unbiased study of world religions. 
Jesus s get short shrift, but Eyre's 
Search seldom lags during its 13 episodes, 
from the opening show, Protestant Spirit 
USA. which studies born-again Bap- 
tists and Methodists in Indianapolis, to 
Zulu Zion, on the South African leg of 
à 150,000-mile odyssey that covers Lon- 
don, Kyoto, Rome and Banares without 
once swallowing dogma or arriving at 
any comforting conclusions. 

. 

Two Chicago movie  critics—Roger 
Ebert of the Sun-Times and Gene Siskel 
of the Tribune—are going national with 
their PBS program Sneak Previews, which, 


when it started a couple of years age 
as a local show on the Windy City’s 
WwrTW, alled Opening Soon at 


а Theater Near You. (The title was 
dumped when it was found to be too 
wordy for most TV-listing publications.) 
Ebert, the country's only Pulitzer Prize 
winning movie aiti, and Siskel will 
hold forth every two weeks on current 
film fare, includi оп occ = 
ovie releases, showing film clips from 
ach. The two have the most fun, to all 
appearances, with thei Dog of the 
Week" selections, those pictures they 
individually find the worst bets (sample 
past. picks: Master of the Flying Guillo- 
tine, Gray Lady Down). I's all done in 
ely, bantering style—and at the end 
of the half hour, you've learned a lot 
abour what's going to be showing at 
your local Bijou. 


ion, 


DINING & DRINKING 


ood evening; 

I'm Carol and 
your waiter will 
be Rasputin," was 
the cowgirl's open- 
ing line at Molly 
Murphy's House of 
Fine Repute, а funky 
Oklahoma City 
restaurant (1100 
South Meridian) 
where an all-star 
st of costumed 
ters and wait- 
resses dishes out 
theatrics along 
with beef and sea- 
food specialties. In 
city that named 
its airport alter 
will Radel you 
expect а cert 
amount of levity, 


wi 


Oh, yes, the food 


Molly Murphy's 
prime- 
rib-and-seafood 


menu (из un 
rolled оп a large 
scroll) is not com. 
prised of the 
stuff that culinary 
dreams are made 

n, but the offer 
ings are good and 
tasty—and who 
be thinking 
scriously bout 
food in a joint 
like this? 

Owner Bob Ta 
yar spent over 
$1,000,000 on the 
building and fur 
nishings; the mo 
tif changes every 
12 feet. One table 


but when your 
dinner is served 
by а white-robed, 
bearded man with 
one blackened eye, 
a dagger tucked 
his sash and a 


There’s a restaurant in 
Oklahoma City where your 
waiter is Rasputin—or C-3PO. 


is totally enclosed 
in a bamboo | 
Diners can 
inside а w 
well or against 
the stone-wall 


evil leer second 
only to the one Lionel Barrymore wore 
in his MGM portrayal of the mad mouk, 
you don't laugh. 

Rasputin is not the only recognizable 


t Molly Murphy s; Blacula, 
п, Mr. Spock (the Star Trek 
Spock), General Custer, Hot Lips Houli- 
han, Wee Willie Winkie, Abe Lincoln, 
Henry Morton Stanley (searching for Dr. 
Livingstone, we presume) and Batman 
wander by; and you can sense that there 
are more costumed loonies lurking about, 
just waiting to pop up when you least 
expect them. 

Shortly after Rasputin took our order, 

an altercation developed between him 
and Blacula over something Rasputin 
had said. (The way we heard it, the mad 
monk called the count a "sorry sucker.") 
Blacula responded by drawing a four- 
foot sword. Rasputin just happened to 
have a similar weapon tucked under his 
robe and off they went in a flurry of 
tinkling Russian bells and flowing red- 
lined cape, dueling among the customers’ 
tables. For the denow nt, the pair sud- 
denly wheeled and pointed their swords 
an unlucky patron. 
Not only does Molly Murphy's 
like a madhouse inside, but its ext 
a patchwork of rough-cut wooden 
gles and Byzantine stained-glass windows 
topped by a crownlike dome, gives the 
rest tthe appearance of a Russian 
Orthodox church that mated with a 
ranch house. 


seem 


backdrop of 
English castle. If you dig behindithe 
scenes tours of movie studios, you'll love 
Molly Murphy's. 

Then theres the salad car, a shiny 
red Jaguar XKE parked in the middle 
of the dining room. Fitted into the hood 
and trunk are buckets of soup, salad and 
accompanin 
mechanic dressed in a blue racing suit. 

As if all this isn't enough, Molly Mur- 
phy's also offers a Bacchus F 
ties of four or more at 59.95 е; 
meal, according to Tayar, is "damn near 
like an orgy." A feast for [our [catu 
а 36-ounce sirloin and а whole chicken 
surrounded by baked onions, tomatoes, 
bell peppers, carrots, mushrooms, boiled 
potatoes and heaping mounds of fruits 
of the season—all toted on a huge plat- 
ter to your table by a conga line of si 
ing waiters and waitresses. 

Buoyed by Molly Murphy's succe 
Oklahoma 
opened a second one in Tulsa and there 
are plans for others in Denver and Dal- 
las. We've also learned that the Star 
Wars craze has hit Molly Murphy's: Ras- 
putin, on alternate days, becomes Darth 
Vader; and another waiter is build: 
a C3PO body 

Molly Murphy's is open for di 
only, from 5 р.м. to ЇЇ pat, Su 
through Thursday, and from 5 
midnight on Friday and Saturday. 
adjoining disco is o 
nightly. Most major credit cards а 
cepted, but 


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44 


s anybody who has the slightest in- 
A terest in jazz knows, there arc no 
flies on reed man Phil Woods. A superb 
studio- and sideman. Woods is currently 
the leader of a group that continues to 
make its presence felt on the music scene 
The Phil Woods Quintet /Song for Sisyphus 
(Century) is a directto-dise recording 
that burnishes an already brilliant 
sound. The alto and soprano work of 
Woods provides а steady stream of sur- 
prise: ne should never take his line 
of attack for granted. The title tune, 
composed by Woods, is a moody thing, 
reflecting. perhaps, the uphill struggle 
to make it in the jazz biz on his own 
terms. Along with pianist Mike Melillo, 


guitarist Harry Leahey, bassist Steve 
Gilmore and drummer Bill Goodwin, 
Woods has gone a long way toward 


proving that it can. be done, What you 
need is talent to spare. The rest of the ses- 
sion encompasses everything Irom Irving 
Berlin to Django Reinhardt to Dizzy 
Gillespie and Charlie Parker. Woods & 
Co. do them all proud. 

. 

Andy Gibb's first album, Flowing 
Rivers, showed, as they say, promis 
with his monstrously popular second al 
bum, Shadow Doneing (RSO), he delivers 
promise. Once you get past the 
st Bee Gee" hype, it gets down 
10 how often you can listen to the album 
without getting tired of it and how many 
та pel you to move the needle on 
to the next tune. Answers to the above, 
1 order, are: hours and hours, and may 
be one. What's most remarkable is that 
the most listenable side is side two, for 
which Andy wrote all the material. RSO 
must not have as much faith in little (20- 
year-old) Andy as it has in the gargan- 
tuan talent of his older brother Barry. 
because it has promoted Shadow Danc- 
the lead single, Why, an Everlasting 
Love (the only boring song on the al. 
bum) and (Our Love) Don’t Throw It 
All Away as hit singles, all written or со. 
written by Barry. But the songs that make 
us want to get up and spank are One 
More Look at the Night, 1 Go for You 
and Good Feeling, all by Andy, on side 
There must be something in the 
nes that makes all their music 
sound like a sound track of a disco 
movie: One could have used Shadow 
Dancing behind Saturday Night Fever 
and matched the Bee Gees sound track 
(except for the incredibly brilliant Night 
Fever) Vor instant likability. In fact, 
it t Robert Stigwood 
¢ for Andy Gibbs 
E we were Andy, we'd be insulted 

. 

After a number of fine early albums 
and productive years in Canada, Jesse 
Winchester finally toured the U.S. to 


two. 
Gibb 


Phil Woods's Sisyphus. 


The Phil Woods Quintet 
serves up a musical feast; 
baby Bee Gee Andy Gibb 

delivers an impressive 
Shadow Dancing. 


promote last year’s Nothing but a Breeze. 
His excellent new album, A Touch on the 
Rainy Side (Bcarsvillc), is in great part a 
reaction to the rigors of concert touring. 
Producer Norbert Putnam did home 
work: Winchester's most appealing traits 
from previous work (unregretful home- 
sickness, strong imagery, cautious opti- 
mim) are emphasized and the tunes 
match well the talents of the Nashville 
sesion men. The early Seventies mood 
that created Mississippi, You're on My 
Mind is retapped for Wintry Feeling— 
this time about Montreal. A Showman's 
Life claims dismay with the life on the 
one-nighter trail. “The wear and tear/ 
On an old honky-tonker's he: 
wb Jesse's confident 


t” Lyrics 


short Roger С. 

x solo on Little Glass of Wine 

bumps), this album is a 

perfect boost to а carcer already on 
g upswing, 

. 

On the cover of The Men—Machine (| 
tol), Kraftwerk's latest record, аге four 
пеп in a row, their expressionless faces 
in three-quarter profile. The four we 
identical black. nd bright crimson 
ly heightened in 
the bright lipstick 
у ide. the sleeve is dec 
orated with two more pictures of the 


$ goos 


api- 


ne men in the same pose and the same 
clothes and the same lack of expression. 
All alike. No, t! This guy's wearing. 
a belt and this one isn't. How about 
that? Their music matches the pictures: 
all electronic, artificial. Phy re те 
peated and repeated until the tiniest 
variation is like an explosion. The 
lyric” of Metropolis consists of the title 
repeated over and over and over. This is 
music to initial routing slips by 


es 


Mediocrity in pop music has achieved 
heights that just wouldn't have been 
possible even ten years ago. This e 
sentially gloomy reflection has been in- 
ired by two albums—Joln Wesley 
Ryles's Shine on Me (ABC) and The Form 
(Capitol), by Mel MeDaniel. There is no 
particular reason to single out these two 
from the general run of new releases, 
but then, it is part of the nature of 
mediocrity not to stand out from the 
usual. Both ol these young men arc 
country singers with pleasant voices and 
a reasonable degree of competence. 
Given a really catchy song, cither one 
could have a h Neither of these rec- 
ords has any material thut good, but 
both show what a good producer and a 
good group of backup musicians can do 
singer. Today's recording technol- 
ogy gives every voice depth and reso- 
nance. Maybe the time is ripe for a new 
busi nity recording. A good en- 
gineer with a 96-track computerized 
studio could make any shower-stall sing- 
er with a big ego and a few bucks sound 
like . well, who's your fants 
favorite? Mick Jagger? Merle Haggard? 
Luciano Pavarotti? Step right up. 


сэз: v 


SHORT CUTS 
The Rolling Stones / Some Girls (Rolling 
Stones Records): The most extreme 


Stones fanatic we know 
his life in poverty 


s a guy who has 
working various 
day jobs, so that at night he 
could front some miserable bar band 
and imitate Mick Jagger. He can sing 
other styles, but he lias missed fame and 
fortune because lie refuses to do it any 
other way—he wants to be Mick. He 
bought Some Girls the instant it came 
out; took it home and put it on the 
turntable; played through both sides 
without interruption, to the very last 
note: lifted the album carefully from the 
turntable—and Frisbeed it thou- 
sand shards of vinyl against ihe wall 
across from him. We didn't do quite 
that—finding the old fire in at least one 
cut, Respectable—but, truth be told, 
afterward we did spell relict D-E-C-E-M 
D-E-R-5 C-H-LL-D-R-E 

Iggy Pop / TV Eye (RCA): A live album 
from the original punk that captures 
all of his raw power to irritate. 


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The Shy Man's Way 
To Meet Girls 


Don Ricci had always been shy with girls. 
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Don is still shy with girls — but that doesn't 
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For example — in just one week out of last 
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Maybe so. But give us half a chance, and 
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Okay — now we're going to let you in on 
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In a six month period. nine different girls 
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He's always getting presents from girls. 
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He never has to worry about seducing 
irls. И one doesn’t want to sleep with him. 
he simply moves on to another. There's al- 
ways plenty to choose from 

And we'll show you exactly how he does 
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Ir doesn't require “good looks." Don 
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It doesnt require a “good personality. 7 
Being bashful or feeling uneasy with girls 
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Remember also — that you may not lose 
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reviews: What is there to look for- 

ward to on the fall book list? Plenty! 
Nonfiction books run the gamut from 
the very serious Criminal Violence, Criminal 
Justice (Random House), subtitled “Crim- 
inals, Police, Courts and Prisons in 
America,” by Charles E. Silberman; 
through the witty Auto Ads (David Obst 
Random House), pictured here, by Jane 
& Michael Stern, a fascinating survey of 
75 years of car advertising; to the sub- 
lime Brother Billy (Harper & Row), by 
Ruth Carter Stapleton, the very last 
word—maybe—on the First Brother. 
And, of course, there is lots in between: 
By Myself (Knopf), by Lauren Bacall, a 
"star" bio actually written by the star; 
James Jones: A Personal Memoir (Double. 
day), by his friend Willie Morris; Carl 
agan and numerous associates put to- 
gether Murmurs of Earth: The Voyager Inter- 
stellar Record (Random House), the story 
of the attempt to communicate with pos- 
sible extraterrestrials by placing a 
record aboard the Voyager space- 
craft; A Dangerous Place (Little, Brown), 
by Daniel Р. Moynihan, about the seven 
months thc Senator served as U, S. Ambas- 
sador to the UN; and a completely new 
People's Almanac #2 (Morrow), by David 
Wallechinsky and Irving Wallace, every- 
one’s favorite pop encyclopedists. Fiction 
fares well, too: The Coup (Knopf), a new 
John Updike novel, concerns the rise and 
fall of an imaginary African kingdom; 
Larry McMurtry's latest, Somebody's Darling 
(Simon & Schuster), is about the Western 
frontier —Hollywood; more horror is 
due from Stephen King, the author of 
Salem's Lot and The Shining, in The 
Stand (Doubleday); Herr Nightingale and the 
Satin Woman (Knopf), by William Kotz 
winkle, is a sassy love story illustrated by 
Joe ЅегуеПо with Thirties pulp-romance 
drawings; and a new one from Patrick 
Anderson (who gave us The President's 
Mistress), called White House (Simon & 
Schuster), convinces us that the Washing- 
ton novel is alive and well. From here, 
all of the above look like good reading. 

. 

Let the reader bew: This is a 
biased review. Many of the studies in 
Irwin Shaw Short Stories: Five Decades (Dc! 
corte) first appeared in the pages of 
PLAYBOY. We liked them enough to buy 
them and run them; upon rereading 
them in the context of Shaw's lifework, 
we appreciate them even more. Shaw is 
a master storyteller and this magazine 
cherishes the moments he has chosen to 
sit at our fire, He leads off his collection 
with The Eighty-Yard Run—a story that 
PLAYBOY published in May 1955. It con- 
cerns an aging football player who re- 
turns one night to a stadium to relive 
the glory of the title run, an event 15 
years in the past. The rite of passage is 


Coming up: Auto Ads. 


Ron Nessen doesn't tell all; 
the best of Irwin Shaw 
and a Robert Redford debut. 


Fifty years of Shaw. 


witnessed by a young couple making out 
on the side lines. A nice touch, perhaps 
Shaw's way of telling the audience that 
discovered him through the television 
production of Rich Man, Poor Man that 
he has been around for a long time, that 
he has played the field of words and 
scored, that he can still ma 
without breathing hard. 
D 

We have to say we had mixed feelings 
about the impending publication of Ron 
Nessen’s It Sure Looks Different from the Inside 
(Playboy Press). On the one hand, we 
had published a portion of the book 
(though in somewhat different form); 
on the other hand, it might be just 
another show-and-tell Government in- 
sider gossiping between hard covers. In 
t, it is a surprisingly intimate set piece 
on America’s only modern accidental 
President, as seen by a loyal but honest 
staffer, his own press secreta 

In a way, the book is most revealing 
by default. For Nessen is loyal enough 
to defend Gerald Ford even when the de- 
fense doesn't sit very well. For example, 
in a chapter called "Saturday Night 
Live," Nessen sets out to demonstrate 
that Ford's internationally famous dum- 
siness was merely something the press 
manufactured out of a couple of random 


incidents. Ford falls on his ass in Salz- 


burg and Nesen says it was "poor 
planning by Spanish officials." Sort of 
ike blaming Vietnam on "poor plan- 


ning by French officials.” It's because of 
this touching effort to set history straight 
that the book is honestly funny, as Ford 
goes from trying to kill himself to having 
other people attempt it for him to his 
latest trick of trying to kill people with 
golf ball. Chevy Chase couldn't have 
done it better. 
. 

It sounded like an intriguing prem- 
ise—the CIA, the Mob, a United States 
Senator, an eroticarts dealer and a porn 

king all competing to get their hands 

on a rumored pomographic film of 

Hitler’s last days in the bunker—the 

ultimate X-rater, Adolf cavorting naked 

while the Russians are shelling Berlin. 

But despite the nifty premise, Don De- 

Lillo's new novel, Running Dog (Knopf), 

is a bore, full of loose ends, convoluted 

dialog, unconvincing characterizations 

and dull, unsuspenseful plotting. Worse 

yet—and all too predictably—the film 

turns out to be a washout, just another 

one of Eva Braun's corny home movies. 
. 

The Outlaw Trail (Grosset & Dunlap), 
by Robert Redford—yes, it's the RR—is 

ап account of a trip he and several oth- 

} ers took along much of the legendary 

wail that stretches from Montana to 
the Mexican border and was the main 
rugged highway for every bandit, grifter 
and scoundrel worthy of a wANTED post- 
er, Much of it—at the moment, anyway— 
remains wilderness, some of the toughest 
and emptiest (and most beautiful) in the 
country; sections of the tail in Utah 
now snake through national parks. 

What could have been an exercise in 
pure ego (who wouldn't publish a book 
with RRS by-line2) and/or nostalgia is 
better than that, Jonathan Blair's fine 
photographs throughout don't hurt a bit, 

good hard point emerges among 
outlaw anecdotes: The dread 
BLM (Bureau of Land Management) is 
rightly regarded as a chief villam їп 
these parts, insensitive to the value of 
preserving anything from our frontier 
past, being fonder instead of setting fire 
to century-old cabins and drowning 
whole ghost towns so that turkeys in 
power boats can go zooming and foam- 
ing over them. 

Good for Redford. He won't scare 
many writers out of business, but his 
name will get the word out. Ed Abbey, a 
member of the group that went along on 
the trip, has for some time been writing 
about this second rape of the West with 
beauty, humor and blue burning rage. 
So after this one, try his Desert Solitaire 
and The Monkey-Wrench Gang. 


45 


The spirit of the Czar lives on. 


< 


It was the Golden Age of Russia. 
Yet in this time when legends 
lived, the Czar stood like a giant 
among men. 

He could bend an iron bar 
or his bare knee. Crush a silver 
ruble with his fist. And had a 
thirst for life like no other man 
alive. 

And his drink was Genuine 
Vodka. Wolfschmidt Vodka. 
Made by special appointment to 
his Majesty the Czar. And the 
Royal Romanov Court. 

It's been 120 years since then. 
And while life has changed since 
the days of the Czar, his Vodka 
remains the same. 

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por Gossip: Orion Pictures (the inde- 

pendent movie company formed by 
ex-UA execs) is prepping Heart Beal, 
set to star Nick Nolte, Sissy Spacek and John 
s a love story involving Beat 
Generation characters Jack Kerouec, Neal 
Cassady and Carolyn Cassady. Spacek has 
also been tagged to play Loretta Lynn in 
the singer's biopic Coal Miner's Daugh- 
ter. . . . Frank Zappa will be one of the 


first hosts of Saturday Night Live this 


season. Rumor has it that there'll be 
some changes in the Weekend Update 
format. . . . F. Lee Bailey has written a first 
novel, Secrets, set for December publi- 
cation. It's about a veteran lawyer ar- 
rested for murder. . . . English actress 
Nicola Роден (she played Anna Karenina 
in the PBS series) is being considered for 
the title role in The Vivien Leigh Story. 
If she lands that role, she's inch to 
get the Scarlett O'Hara part in MGM's 
sequel to Gone with the Wind. . .. The 


coe series, Dirty Laundry, w 
bookstore racks this month. The serics 
involves a former newspaper columnist 
turned free-lance writer who unwittingly 
gets himself involved in some Raymond 
Chandlerlike dilemmas and turns into a 
private dick. . . . The latest rage 
Hollywood seems to be Dracula pi 
Frank Langella, who played Drac oi 
Broadway, will star in Universal's film 
of the play. George Hamilton will star in 
Love at First Bite, a comedic treatment 
with Hamilton in the lead sans fangs. 
Ken Russell is also prepping a Dracula 
flick and Paramount is developing one 
based on Anne Rice's best seller, Interview 
with the Vampire. . . . Director Jeannot 
Sxware says he's looking for "a nice little 
love story" to direct after the rigors of 
Sounds familiar—steven Spielberg 
said the same thing after completing the 
original Jaws and wound up with Close 
Encounters, 


. 

STORMY WEATHER: Since there wasn't а 
single hotel in all of Bora Bora that 
could reserve enough rooms to ac 
commodate the entire crew of The 
Hurricane for five months of filming, 


producer Dino De Lourentiis built his own 
3,500,000 hotel, which will become a 
new resort for the island once the on- 
location shooting is completed. Becausc 
of scarce facilities in the remote loca- 
tion, De Laurentiis also had to buy his 
own freighter, 20 jeeps, two trucks and 
an amphibious «тай, all part of a 
$15,000,000 budget for the remake of the 
John Ford ‘sic, now starring Jason Ro- 
berds, Mia Farrow, Max Von Sydow, Trevor 
Howard and Timothy Bottoms. 
. 

HEADLINER: Holt, Rinehart & Winston 
is keeping Michael Drosnin's book Citizen 
Hughes under tight wraps until publica- 
tion in January. The book, subtitled 
“In His Own Words—How Howard 
Hughes Tried to Buy America,” reported- 
ly contains never-before-published pri- 
vate papers, what amounts to a diary 
kept by Hughes during the height of his 
wealth and power. “This book,” say the 
publishers, “is, in essence, his autobiog- 
raphy. More than that, it's а startling 
record of the secret history of our times,” 
with a cast that includes Richard Nixon, 
LBJ, Hubert Humphrey and the Kennedys. 
Hughes experts speculate that Drosnin 
may have gotten hold of the mysterious 
Romaine Street Documents that were 
stolen from the Hughes organization in 
1974. Among those papers was a docu- 
ment that reportedly revealed the real 
purpose of the Glomar expedition, 

. 

A star ıs sorn: Shooting will begin 
soon on NBC's Freedom Road, starring 
none other than The Champ himself, 
Muhammad Ali, in the role of Gideon 


Jackson, the ex-slave who returns to the 
South alter the Civil War, locks horns 
with the Klan and eventually becomes a 
U.S. Senator. “I've been offered hun- 
dreds of parts,” says Ali, “but this one is 
istory. This is me. This is what I am in 
real life. If I had lived in those days, 
І would have been Gideon Jackson. 
People often ask, ‘Can he act?’ I've been 
acting ever since I've been boxing. Every- 


thing I do is an act, and people believed 
it. They said they wanted somebody to 
play a bad nigger . . . well, I am a 
baanad nigger." 


. 

DAYS OF WINE AND MOSES: “Richard Drey- 
fuss and I have known each other since 
the sixth grade and we've been talking 
about doing a movie project together 
for the past 20 years,” says Cer Borack, 
whose childhood fantasy has become a 
reality with The Big Fix, the film he jus 
coproduced with Dreyfuss. Due out in 
id-October, Fix is the story of Moses 
Wine, an ex-Berkeley activist turned 
private eye. Will The Big Fix signal the 
beginning of a whole new image for 
Dreyfuss—that of a romantic leading 
n? "Richard really looks great in 
this picture,” says Borack, "He's wry, 
charming, witty—and attractive. In fact, 


Dreyfuss Clayburgh 


he resembles the young Paul New- 
man in many ways—he dropped 30 
pounds for this role.” Shortly before 
shooting was to commence, Dreyfuss 
an accident. "Rather 
than delay shooting,” says Borack, “we 
wrote the broken wrist into the script 
and it became one of the more amusing 
aspects of the film." Fix co-stars Susan 
Anspach as Wine's old Berkeley girlfriend. 
. 


INCEST, ITALIAN style: The plot of 
Bernardo Bertolucci's new film, La Luna, 
is so top secret Bernardo has instructed 
his leading lady, Jill Clayburgh, not to 
breathe a word of it to anyone, and 
his own PR people are using the stock 
line that “it's such a delicate, fragile 
story that you cannot describe it ade- 
quately.” Smelling controversy, we got a 
source close to Bertolucci to spill the 
beans. “It's about incest," says our 
source. “Theres an angle in the film 
concerning incest between the mother 
and the son." (Clayburgh pi 1 opcra 
ger who goes to Italy with her teen- 
ged son after her husband's death.) 
Bertolucci supposedly offered the Cla 
burgh role to Liv Ullmann first, but "prior 
commitments” prevented Liv from 


accepting. — —Jonx nouem, EQ 
- 


47 


Our engine sits sideways 


When people sit in a Honda Civic’ 1200'or Civic СУСС” for the 
first time, they are often surprised at the amount of room inside. 


They discover that despite their brief overall length our Civics 
have plenty of room for four adults. Plus luggage space behind 
the rear seat. 


How do we do it? To help solve the mystery, we took the roof 
and hood off a Honda Civic CVCC Hatchback. 


As you can now see, one reason for the Civic’s roominess is the 
way the engine sits. Because it sits sideways, instead p 
, y 


HONDA CIVIC CVCC 4-SPEED HATCHBACK. 


soyou dont have to. 


lengthwise, the engine doesn’t interfere with front-seat legroom. 
Instead, it is neatly tucked away up front, out of everybody’s way. 


Of course, the engine in our Civic CVCC 4-speed Hatchback is 
sitting pretty when it comes to fuel economy. This model got 
42 mpg for highway driving, 36 mpg city, according to EPA 
estimates. The actual mileage you get will vary depending on 
the type of driving you do, your driving habits, your car’s 
condition and optional equipment. Mileage estimates are lower 
for California and high altitude cars. 


Getting back to roominess. We gave the Civic additional space by 
giving it front-wheel drive. This 
means there is no drive-shaft to the 
rear wheels, so the hump running 
through the passenger compart- 
ment is reduced. 


So now when you sit in a Honda 
Civic, please don't be surprised that 
you're not cramped for space. And 
that you're not sitting sideways. 


After all, it was a simple matter to 
make our engine sit that way 


instead. 
к ом юл] 


We make it simple. 


*Civic 1200 nor available in California and high altitude areas. 
© 1978 American Honda Motor Co., Inc. Civic, Civic 1200, and CVCC are Honda trademarks. 


Wrangler thinks 
Americans 
should get what 

they pay for. 
Thats your 
right and our 

responsibility. 

Wrangler has 

as many looks 

as men have 
lifestyles. 


= EE Р 


THE PLAYBOY ADVISOR 


АМ, wite and 1 met another couple and 
after only three visits, we were playing 
strip checkers. When we were all naked, 
we changed partners and started making 
out like newlyweds right in front of each 
other. I was really getting it on with the 
other girl and 1 looked over at my wife 
and her partner and it looked like they 
hadn't lost any time, either. I asked the 
other girl if she would like to go to the 
bedroom and she answered yes. To my 
surprise, her husband entered the bed- 
room after we had been balling about 
five minutes and blew his stack. My wife 
and I got dressed and left, knowing that 
we would never see them again. Two 
days later, they came over to our house 
and we sat around drinking all after- 
noon. All four of us just sat there like 
bumps on a log, making conversation. 
The subject of what happened that night 
hasn't come up again. It was the first 
time my wife and I ever did anything 
like that so we don't know why the other 
couple still secs us. Do they want to start 
the relationship again? How can we 
bring this out into the open? We're not 
sure what they want.—B. R., Lake Jack- 
son, Texas. 

It sounds like they aren't sure what 
they want, either, Maybe it was their first 
time and they want to kiss and make 
ош. Invite them over to talk about it. 
Maybe it would work out if you took ita 
bit slower. Try strip chess. Or blindman's 
buf]. What he can't see won't bother him. 


О. the advice of a friend, 1 recently 
purchased a super amplifier that puts 
out about 200 watts. І think 1 could 
have saved some money, because a quar- 
ter turn of my volume knob gives me 
enough juice to rattle the windows. Is 
all that power necessary2—R. T., Detroit, 
Michigan. 

Probably not, unless you're a glazier. 
What you've got, though, is a pretty 
good hedge against distortion, the nem- 
esis of the low-powered amp. The те- 
lationship of volume to power output, 
you see, is based on a factor of ten. 
In other words, doubling the volume 
will not draw twice as much power 
from your amp, it will draw ten times 
the power. If your amp is putting out 
five watts to reproduce a violin solo and 
the violinist hits a note twice as loud as 
the ones before, your amp will have to 
put out 50 watts to reproduce it. Other- 
е, you will get distortion. that can 
rattle more than your windows. 


На 1 have wied everything and 
you're my last hope. 1 am very open to 
any kind of sex and have always enjoyed 
experimentation. I recently married (my 


husband and [ had lived together for 
several months). Now, here's the shock. 
After one week of marriage, he informed 
me that he can't stand to go down on 
mc, or any other woman, for that matter. 
He claims that the "fishy" smell of the 
vagina is distasteful. I've tried douching, 
but then he says that the smell is soapy. 
What do you suggest? My husband 
doesn't bother to get into any kind of 
foreplay. He just lies back and expects 
me to kiss and lick him from head to 
toe, front to back. Then he's ready to go 
and I'm as dry as a bone. Even my imag- 
ination doesn't help anymore. He seems 
to think it's my problem, that I'm just 
oversexed.—Mrs. D. H., Chicago, Illinois. 
First: Visit your gynecologist. The most 
common cause of vaginal odor is a bac- 
terial infection. The characteristic fishy 
smell is symptomatic of а Hemophilus 
vaginalis infection. A vaginal smear will 
indicate the presence of the bacteria. 
Treatment consists of both you and your 
partner taking antibiotics. (Both partners 
need treatment to prevent a ping-pong 
reinfection pattern.) In addition, you 
may use a sulfa cream for a few days. 
However, it sounds to us as though this 
problem is in your husband’s head, not 
yours. If the doctor gives you a clean bill, 
you're going to have to tackle the prob- 
lem of communication with a reluctant 
spouse. There is nothing distasteful 
about a natural woman in good health. 


V use my favorite pair of athletic shoes 
for tennis and jogging in the summer 


and for racquetball in the winter. My 
tennis partner says I'l ruin my [eet 
using the same shoes for each activity, 
but I can't afford to buy three different 
pairs. Does it really make a difference 
what shoes I wear as long as my feet don't 
complain?—M. A., Chicago, Illinois. 

The current bumper crop of athletic 
shoes is the result of necessity as well as 
greed. Different sports put different 
kinds of strains on your feet. Running 
shoes, for example, help absorb the shock 
of jogging as well as provide support 
for your feet. (That shock has been esti- 
mated at about 600 tons per foot over a 
ten-mile course.) They are also con- 
structed for forward movement, whereas 
tennis shoes must allow laieral maneuver- 
ability, too. Playing or running surfaces 
must also be taken into account. The 
hardwood floor of a racquetball court 
dictates a suction-cup type of sole, while 
clay tennis courts call for a line pattern 
for traction. On grass and dirt, a waffle- 
tread sole works best for jogging. The 
fact that your feet don’t complain is no 
reason for handicapping yourself with 
improper footgear. And the amount of 
money you spend for the proper shoes 
will certainly be offset by better perform- 
ance. Your feet won't fail you now or 
later. 


Û have known a certain woman very well 
for 25 years. She is in what you would 
call the upper middle class and is finan- 
cially well off. She is attractive and has 
an absolutely beautiful body. Also, I 
guess you could say she is a nympho- 
maniac and definitely an exhibitionist, 
The following is just a fraction of some 
of the capers that I have seen myself. She 
will perform any sex act known with any 
one who will get together with her. She 
will have intercourse while others watch 
her. At a cabin party in the mountains, 
she got up on top of a table and did a 
striptease in front of nine men, taking 
off everything except a black garter belt, 
nylon stockings and her high-heel pumps. 
Then she spent the weekend having re- 
peated sex with every one of us. Between 
Friday night and Sunday afternoon, she 
screwed the nine of us 37 times, and then 
on Sunday she teased and made fun of us 
because we couldn't go anymore. I called 
her once when a friend passing 
through town and she went over to the 
motel where he was staying and spent 
the night with him. She has sucked men 
off in front of others and she always 
swallows the semen. One night at a bar, a 
total stranger sitting next to her started 
making passes and she turned to him and 
asked him pointblank if he wanted to 
have sex. They got up and walked 


51 


PLAYBOY 


52 


whe 


“1 have clinched and closed with the naked 


North, I have learned to defy and defend; 
Shoulder to shoulder we have fought it 
otf yet the wildmust win in the end: 

*Robert Service = 


” The black sheep of 
= 


Ivan 
TR 


| Soft-spoken and smooth, its hundred-proot potency 
XI. simmers just below the surface. Straight, on the rocks, or 
mixed, YUKON JACK is a breed apart; unlike any 
Canadian liquor you've ever tasted. 


mported Liqueur made with Blended Canadian Whisky. 


‘Yukon Jack BO and 100 Proof. imported апе Bottled by Heublein Inc. Hartford. Conn. Sole Agents U S A *€ 1007 Dodd, Mead 4 Co Inc. 


outside and got in the back scat of his 
car. It was parked under the lig 
we could see through the window as she 
slid down her panties and lay down. We 
could see her high heels locked up 
around this fellow's back. After they fin- 
ished, they came back in and he was 
carrying her black panties and we 
cheered. Over the years, I estimate that 
well over 1000 men have had sex with 
her. My question is, How long will this 
tremendous sex drive continue? She is 
now almost 50 years old, though her 
body would pass for that of a woman of 
30. She keeps it in perfect condition. 1 
have told another very close friend who 
is also concerned that as she gets older, 
her sex drive will wane. Please tell me 
how much longer her exhibitionism and 
uncontrollable sex drive will continue.— 
R. H., Detroit, Michigan. 

Shades of Granny. Our guess is that 
the lady and her sex drive will outlive 
the bunch of you. To reverse an old 
saying, sex is 99 percent inspiration and 
one percent perspiration: There are some 
physiological changes with age, but the 
desire and ability to make love are essen- 
tially the products of a dirty mind. And 
dirty minds only get better with age. 


V enjoy cating food spiced with mari- 
juana. It gives me a much deeper and 
longer high than smoking joints. But the 
grass is not particularly appetizing, espe- 
cially when added to my morning eggs. Is 
it possible to boil the grass and then add 
the water to the food? I don't like green 
4 —M. B., Tulsa, Oklahoma 

You'd probably be better off feeding 
the grass to your chickens and trying to 
get stoned by eating them. THC, the ac- 
live ingredient in marijuana, is not water 
soluble. The best you can hope for is a 
limp suspension. it is soluble, however, 
in grain alcohol, butter, vegetable oil 
and animal fats. Next time, try grass in 
your chicken soup. 


Heads or tails? After several months 
of making love to my girlfriend, I've 
reached an impasse, I prefer to make 
love in the missionary position. She pre- 
fers to make love in the female-superior 
position. She claims that the missionary 
is a male-chauvinist invention.. 1. claim. 
the femalesuperior position is а wom 
en's lib rhetorical device. We are curious. 
What is the most popular position? My 
girlfriend. says that the missionary posi- 
tion is practiced only in America. I can't 
believe that. Do other cultures do it dil- 
ferenuly?—E. G., Boston, Massachusetts. 
Yes. For years, the missionary position 
was America's chief export. It may be 
onsible for the trade deficit. In 
Kinsey's day, the missionary position was 
the only position used by 70 percent of 
the couples surveyed. Nowadays, the fe- 
male superior is pulling its own weight, 
at least in America. But neither position 


OUR NEW CASSETTE DECK WOULD BE DAZZLING 
_ EVEN WITHOUT THE CO 


The first cassette deck 
controlled by computer—a micro- 
processor with no fewer than five 
memories—would be enough to 
dazzle anybody. 

You merely program the com- 
puter: tell it how and when you 
want to listen to which song. 

It controls Sharp's exclusive 
Auto Program Locate Device. This 
unique feature skips ahead or back 
to any song you select (up to 19 
songs) and plays it automatically. 


SHARP € COMPUTER CONTROLLED 


The Direct Memory 
Function automatically 
replays any selection. 

Zero Rewind" allows you 
to set any point on the tape 
as the “beginning.” 

The computer also controls 
Electronic Tape Counting and 
Second Counting, so you always 
know how much tape or time you 
have left. 

A Liquid Crystal Display shows 
you current mode and function. 

The built-in digital quartz clock 
acts as a timing device; it displays 
timed-programming operations, so 
you can actually program your 
RT-3388 to record automatically 
from a radio or TV at any pre-select- 
ed time and then switch itself off. 

But what really makes the 
RT-3388 so special is that the 
musical performance of the deck is 


MPUTER. 


every bit as dazzling as the elec- 
tronic performance of the computer. 

Just a few specs tell the story: 
S/N ratio; 64dB with Dolby.* Wow 
and flutter, a minimal 0.06%. . $ 
Frequency response, 30-16,000 Hz 
(x: Зав) for FeCr. 

Without the computer, the 
RT-3388 would merely be one of 
the best engineered cassette decks 
you could find. 

But how nice that you can 
have the deck with your own pri- 
vate computer to run it. (The 
RT-3388 is just one of a complete 
line of Sharp® cassette decks with 
the unique ability to find and play 
your music for you.) 

When your Sharp dealer 
shows you the RT-3388, we sug- 
gest that you ask to hear some 
music first. 

Then go ahead and let the 
computer dazzle you. 
Sharp Electronics Corp. 
0 КОШЫМ 07652 SHARP 

aramus,N.J. 

SHARP'S 87.2398. ШЕШШ 
THE FIRST COMPUTER THAT PLAYS NOSIC. 


PLAYBOY 


is world-wide, According to psychologist 
Frank Beach, face-to-face lovemaking is 
found in every culture, but most fre- 
quently it takes this form: “The woman 
lies on her back while the man squats 
or kneels between her legs, which are 
placed around his thighs. In the course 
of copulation, he may draw the woman 
close to him and she may lock her legs 
behind his back.” In short, it's like the 
missionary position, only the man is 
praying to a different god. 


intaining 


V wax my car frequently, m 
high gloss. But my brother—a car те 
chanic—says 1 should also use a car pol- 
ish. What's the difference and should I 
use both?—N. P., St. Louis, Missouri. 

We assume your brother didn't offer 
to help with cither, so we understand the 
problem. The fact is, the two products 
ае for different purposes. Your car's 
paint contains oils that evaporate. A car 
polish will replace those oils. On thc 
other hand, if you have no problem with 
excessive evaporation (ij your car looks 
dusty, youve got a problem), all you 
really need is a car wax to form an air- 
tight seal to prevent evaporation. With 
your maintenance schedule, it sounds 
like all you need is wax for your car and 
perhaps a six-pack for your own body. 


| BBecause I travel often in fore 
ES К Sis tries, I'm very much aware of the chang- 

g currency situation with regard to the 
Americam dollar. 1 never really know 


° how much of a foreign currency I'm go- 
ing to get in an exchange a 
| 


many foreigners—hoteliers, ta 


е drivers, restaurateurs, et al—prefer their 
it r own currency. 15 there a way out of this 
mess?—R. K., New York, New York. 


Gold and diamonds ате acceptable cur- 


rency almost anywhere. Unfortunately, 
р е. , d gold tends to be a little heavy in the 


auerage unreinforced pocket and diu- 
monds tend to light up the eyes of cal 
burglars, Luckily, Deak-Pereva, 41 East 
42nd Street, New York, with 58 offices 
world-wide, has set up а Travelers Gur- 
rency Exchange. For your personal check, 
money order (or Visa or Master Charge 
credit number) in the amount of $50 or 
more, it will send you the currency of 
your choice for about a $2.50 fce. I1 will 
such as: Twin Cassettes, also send along a booklet describing the 

Silent Monitor, Rapid currency, tipping customs, metric con- 

Rewind, FestFerwordi versions and clothing sizes. Using its 


быз сы service will probably not save you much 


At home, Record a Call 80 Remote 
is answering your phone auto- 
matically, and storing 
messages. 

Away from home, you dial 
your own phone number, 
then ‘beep’ into the phone 
with your pocket-sized 
decoder and all your stored 
messages will be played 


back to you word for word. Record а Call's at fine in the actual transaction, but it will save 

Record a Call 80 is a com- stores everywhere. you time and hassles on the road looking 

plete telephone answering АН for а bank or a currency exchange. Plus, 

алын Ee ыш (records as you are assured of getling the highest 
speaks) 


АС | possible market value of your greenbacks 
al the time of your purchase. 


Recorda Call Velit ЙЕ! 


ата Е Gnewers for busy Busy Гер = child in the near future. We've been 
T-A.D. Avanti, Inc., 16250 Gundry Avenue, Paramount, California 90721 doing some read 


g and are somewhat 


Someone to fi 
inonthe 


People tell us blank tape has their heads reeling. 

We know why. Blank tape is a jumble, presenting as 
many confusing options as a Chinese menu. Written in 
Chinese. 

Sony ıs prepared to make order out of the chaos. And no 
one is more equipped. We've been making tape for 30 years. 
It's how Sony got started. So we know it backwards and 
forwards. Forward and rewind 

Right now, Sony makes 4 different blank tapes. Each 
has a distinct purpose. We're going toslam through the jargon, 
telling you clearly and specifically, which tape fills which need. 

Others try to make their customers into engineers. We'd 
rather make our engineers talk like our customers. 


Basic Blank. 


The workhorse tape, technically called Low Noise— 
don't trouble yourself why. It's for those times when you just 
want to get it down. 

In school, а boring lecture on “The history of the 
thank-you note through the ages.” 

In the office, yet another budget meeting. In the car, 
for your cassette player. 

At home, for your Uncle lggie practicing the oboe. 


Better Blank. 


While Basic Blank is primarily for speech recording, 
Better Blank is primarily for music. (Its technical name is Hi 
Fidelity, one of the few technical names to explain anything.) 

Better Blank is sensitive to a wide dynamic range— 
which means the lows and the highs. It's particularly valid in 
the bass register—and it won't hurt too much at the cash 
register. 

Better Blank is not Ultimate Blank, but youcan still use 
itin a living room, concert hall, or off a record. 


Beautiful Music Blank. 


If you want to sound knowledgeable, call it Chromium 
Dioxide. A thin coating of that substance makes this tape 
loyal and faithful in the high frequency range. 

So piccolos will sound perfect. Lead singers, sublime. 

Use this tape when quality particularly in the high 
range—is the highest priority. 


Best Blank. 


When the object is the ultimate, end money is no 
object. Officially called Ferri-Chrome, this tape offers 
low distortion and a wide, flat frequency response. 

It combines Chromium Dioxide, to pick up the highs, 
with Fernc Oxide—so the lows reach new heights. There is 
no better tape to reproduce music. 

But do you need Ferri-Chrome? Some say that only the 
Verri-Crazy can tell the difference. But it's nice to know that 
the difference is there—if you have the ears to hear it. 


SONY 


€, 1678 Sony Industnes. A Dision of Sony Corp. of America. 
9 West 57 Street, New York, RIY. 10019. Sony 1s trademark of Sony Corp. 


PLAYBOY 


It’s true. Quanta turntables by BSR are good looking. But many 
people think our specs are even better than our bodies. 

For instance, consider the 500. It's a single-play turntable with 
an exclusive feature. “The Final Touch." What 15 it? Well, at the end of 
a record, the power shuts off. Then, magically and silently, the arm rises 
from the record and returns to Its rest position. Automatically. 

The 500 is made with DC Servo-Controlled Motor, which is the 
quietest motor made. It’s belt driven. And it's got electronic speed 
control to assure you constant record speed. Wow and flutter are less 
than .06% (WRMS). Rumble is better than-65 dB (Din B). 

If you like those specs but prefer a multiple play turntable, then 
think about Quanta's 550-9, 

Of course, both the 500 and the 550-S have a few things in 
common with our other Quanta turntables. Great value as well as great 
beauty. So come take a look at the entire Quanta line at your 


nearest Quanta dealer. BSR 
We give youa lot to choose from because we want youto im 


like us for more than our good looks. BSR CONSUMER PRODUCTS GROUP 
Route 303, Blauvelt, N.Y. 10913 


Beauty and the best. 


worried. For example, we've read that 
women who drink h: chance 
of giving birth to 

Apparently, the problem is so severe, 
the Government is trying to force 
alcoholic-beverage companies into plac- 
ing a warning label on bottles. Can you 
tell us more about this problem—L. W., 
Miami. Florid: 

Unless your wife has been drinking a 
pint of S0 proof a day and is already 
pregnant, you probably have nothing to 
worry about. In 1973, a team of doctors 
headed by К. L. Jones identified the 
Felal Alcohol Syndrome. Children who 
were born to women who were heavy 
drinkers (150 grams of ethanol per day) 
displayed certain characteristics (facial 
abnormalities, deformed limbs, heart 
problems, stunted growth and delayed 
development). The study was not con- 
clusive: Thomas D. Turner, dean стеті- 
tus of the Johns Hopkins University 
school of medicine, pointed out that 
other potentially damaging factors such 
as malnutrilion, heavy smoking, drug 
usage and the age of the mother had not 
been taken into account, Also, the same 

mptoms have been found in the chil- 
den of women who were teetotalers 
The scientific community seems to be 
divided on the question of the effect 
of light or moderate dosages of alcohol. 
Studies have been done that indicate 
there is no significant difference between 
rare drinkers and moderate drinkers on 
the oulcome of pregnancy. Dr. Ernest Р. 
Noble and the National Institute on 
Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism do “not 
endorse an abstinence policy for preg- 
nant omen because there is not 
clear-cut scientific data to support such 
conclusions, . . . In fact, major studies 
throughout this country and other inter 
national studies have indicated that 
small quantities of alcohol ingested daily 
are actually beneficial to the human sys 
tem.” The movement by Government to 
put warning labels on alcoholic bever 
ages seems lo be an overreaction to slight 
evidence, However, the more we learn 
about pregnancy, the more we discover 
that everything seems to have some effect 
on the fetus, especially in its first weeks. 
It pays to plan ahead. A family should 4 
into baining for the big event. Consult 
your doctor for a complete list of forbid 
den fruits, recommended diets, etc., and 
then follow his advice 


All reasonable questions—from fash 
ion, food and drink, stereo and sports cars 
to dating dilemmas, taste and etiquette— 
will be personally answered if the writer 
includes a stamped, self-addressed en 
velope. Send all letters to The Playboy 
Advisor, Playboy Building, 919 N. Michi 
gan Avenue, Chicago, Hlinois 60611. The 
most provocative, pertinent. queries will 
be presented on these pages cach month 


Olympus innovated the concept of the 
compact SLR. The introduction of the ОМ-1 startled 
the world of photography by putting so many 
big ideas into such asmall body. 

And after Olympus did the thinking, 
others did the following. 

Today, the OM cameras still stand ahead 
of the pack with exclusive features. 

OM-1: The #1 Innovation. 

Enter the OM-1. Suddenly, the SLR 
camera is 33% smaller and lighter, yet incredibly 
tugged to meet the demands of professional wear 
and tear. Miraculously, the viewfinder is 70% 
brighter and 30% larger for faster, easier compos- 
ing and focusing. 

And suddenly the OM4 became the 
#1 selling compact SLR. Its metering system is 
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A Quiet Innovation. 

Olympus created a unique shock 
absorber/air damper system to eliminate noise and 
vibration, for sharper, unobtrusive photography. 
Especially vital for long tele shots and macro/micro 
photos. 

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OM-1 is still unsurpassed in its continuous- 
view motor drive capability: 5 pictures per 
second. And a rapid winder that fires as fast as 
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less of lens used 


Imitation. 


The Biggest System Innovation. 

OM-1 is part of the world's most complete 
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all compact design, including 13 interchangeable 
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lenses than any other system, each a marvel of 
optical design and performance. 

The Automatic Innovation: The OM-2. 

It's the fully automatic OM, with major 
differences from all other automatics! The only 
SLR with "off-the-film" light measurement for 
those photographers demanding the ultimate 
innovation in automatic exposure control. Which 
means each frame is individually exposure- 
Controlled even in motor drive or rapid winder 
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Olympus 310 Flash whose flash duration is con- 
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And of course, the OM-2 shares every 
other innovation and system component with 
the OM-1 

We Wrote The Book On Compacts. 

The OM System story is detailed in our 
full color in-depth brochure, yours free for writing 
OLYMPUS, Woodbury, New York 11797. Read itall. 
Discuss the advantages of an Olympus with your 
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Visit your camera store. Compare. 
Wouldn't you rather buy the innovator instead of 
the imitator? 


57 


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THE PLAYBOY SEX POLL 


an informal survey of current sexual attitudes, behavior and insights 


Have you ever seen mud wrestling? 
Pwo nearly naked women grapple with 
cach other in an ooze-filled ring. attempt- 


ing to pin cach other down. One dame 
Jocks her thighs around the other's head. 


Breaking loose from this facesmothering 
hold, her opponent quickly retaliates 
Her powerful arms grab her opponents 
hug 


nude torso in a br 


crushing bea 
As the two battling babes slip and slide 
through the sludge, the men in the audi 
ence hoot and holler, caught up in a 
horny full-fledged frenzy. Howard Cosell 
swallows his microphone. For sure, mud 
wrestling was designed with one purpose 
in mind: 10 the utmost the 
ity of the event. 

ıt about the underlying eroticism 
in all those other sports. the ones most 
people play or watch? Isn't titillation 
part of their basic popularity? We de- 
cided to find out. We asked 100 men and 
100 women if they found spectator sports 
busing. In our usual double rever 
asked them to guess which spectator 
sport the opposite sex would choose as 
an aphrodisiac. On your marks. Go. 

. 


we 


WHICH SPECTA-‏ ا 
TOR SPORT IS THE MOST‏ 
NG FOR WOMEN?‏ 


1 most wo 
whet 
friends and I play football. They dig 
seeing us tackle one another, When we 
become aggressive, they get turned on. 
iwead of going after the ball, 
у, my girl, always tells me she fan- 
izes that our whole team goes alte 


my 


one stud to the next, doing whatever we 
want, sending her into a gangbang stu- 
por. Maybe we could turn her 
into а beer commercial.” 

‘Twenty percent of the men sta 
females found tennis jocks 
Females get an erotic thri 
the men in a tennis match, who 
always so cocksure. Arrogant Jimmy Con- 
ors has set more than one dame I know 
n fire. They really like the challenge of 
taking on a skillful dude like 1 
getting him to show the sime kind of 
finesse in bed with his cock as he does 
on the court with his racket.” 

Thirteen percent of the men suspected 
that track and field was titillating to 
women: "Now that the ladies love to 
jog, they've gotten into cying guys who 


THE SPORTING LIFE 


run, The shorts, the pouring sweat, the 
strained face—all trigger an erotic hot 
flash. Once while running in the p 
1 was picked up by a cute bike ride 
id she admired my stamin 
her into the tall grass and did 


She 
so I took 
few laps. 

Ten percent of the men said they 
thought ladies got excited by boxing: 


"When most women get a load of two 
powerful fighters trying to kill cach other 
п the ring, they feel a very primitive 
rush. Thinking about screwing that in- 
teme kind of body, wondering about the 
massive prong that must accompan 
those muscles can be an overpowering 
sensation,” 

Six percent of the men said skiing 
provided the sensuous thrill: “Broads are 
suckers for the tanned, self-assured hea 
breakers on ski slopes, A skier's every 
ved turns, the 
ighting. It's the only 


move is sensuous—the 
weighting and unw 


sport that's close to ses—a woman сап 
imagine the skier swooping down her 
trails. The rhythm is the same. 


The rest of the sample thought women 
were ти 1 (five per- 
cen), swimm ли), body 
building (two percent), ice hockey (two 


percent), gymnastics (two percent) 
sports-car racing (one percent). 
. 


©: WOMEN, WHICH SPE! 
TOR SPORT IS TH 
AROUSING? 


Twentyeight percent of the women 
said watching а football jock in action 
turned them on: “This sounds weird, 1 
know. But I dig watching football. That 
macho strutting posture gives me goose 
bumps. Although the athlete’s body is 
covered from head to toe with gear and 
clothes, his pants are so tight, they look 
like they're painted on, showing all those 
welldeveloped bulges, not to mention 
his snug little ass. Ir makes my juices 
How.” 

Sixteen percent of the women stated 
that a male tennis player w 


A- 
MOST 


as irresistible: 
“As a hard-to-get 16-year-old 1 
once agreed to а strip-poker tennis match 


h Andy. my high school boyfriend 
early in the morning at 
club courts, So even was 
at for two sets, only a few 
ments went back and forth. Andy got 
fierce in the third—t ¢ 


aked, I wa 


ally let him deflower me 
e on the clay. Ever since then, 
all 1 can think of whenever I look at 
men playing tennis is fucking 

Twelve percent of the women reported 
that guys playing basketball were titillat 
ng: “Maybe to Woody Allen they look 
ke overactive thyroids jumping around 
п undershorts, but. to me, those lanky 
ketball players are an crotic delight 
heir revealing outfits show off some 
great bodies, well trained. and ready to 
ха 


Ten percent of the women said they 
got excited by boxers: "Just thinking 
about a champion like Muhammad. Ali 
working out makes me hot between the 
legs. Thanks to him, prize fighting has 
become my favorite sport. 1 know it's a 
wild extension of my S/M fantasies, but I 
sure get a bang se acable brutes 
pummel each othe 
Fight percent of the women said a 
swimming provided a sensuous 
П: "Diving and swimming аге my 
turn-on. E can't keep my eyes off my lover 
when he's standing on that board, his 
prick tucked tightly into a superbriel 
suit. I adore his slim hips and the w 
lightens his ass, springing 
the perfect moment. I th 


v he 
по action at 


5% 


PLAYBOY 


60 


something about that kind of control that 
cminds me of his performance in bed. 
He knows just how to hold back until 
I'm so hot and horny I beg him to come. 

Eight percent. preferred 
male track athlete wor 
something about a runner, body sweat- 
ing, clothes clinging, that's close to what 
an Jooks like duri lovemaking. His 
t is pounding, there's a slight flush 
to his face, he's healthy and very much. 
an animal, I know that if I touch him, 
all that blood will rush to his erection, 
Well start making love at the point 
most lovemaking leaves off. 

The rest of the sample was turned on 
by hockey (six percent), baseball (four 
percent), lacrosse (four percent), skiing 
(two percent) and gym! s (two 
percent). 


h 


Q: WOMEN, WHICH SPECTA- 
TOR SPORT IS THE MOST 
AROUSING FOR MEN? 


Twenty 
said watching a 
turn most guys on: “AL 
I know get hard-ons watching 
graceful Lolitalike creatures 
the bars, flying through the 
in luscious splits. Those 
nymphs have the power to fog men's 
minds. My boyfriend would love to see a 
private performance in the nude. 

Twenty-one percent of the women 
stated that men found gals who swam 
irresistible: "I know a lot of fellas who 
wish they were lifeguards. Sitting up 
that tall chair, binoculars to their eyes, 
they spy at us in our bikinis, frolicking 
in the ocean—our asses, breasts, pubes 
barely covered. One lifeguard I knew 
told me he used to fantasize a special 
kind of rescue. He'd jump in and drag 
some honey from the deep and—talk 
about artificial respiration—he'd put his 
tongue in her mouth and his cock in her 
cunt and make her come е. 

Twenty pe t of the women re- 
ported the t id-field. stars titillated 
men: o dude сап 
barely clad sweat 


ght percent of the womei 

female gymnast would 
ost all the chaps 
those 


running 
push her sinewy frame 
for miles on the tack, imagine her en- 
duran his bed, trying to prove her- 
self in a marathon fuck fest.” 

Nineteen percent of the women s 
they thought guys got excited by a 1 
playing t “Men love the paradox 
of those innocentlooking darlings, 
dressed virginal white mini 
skirts, playing such a powerful sport. All 
that skimming of balls sets their own 
sexual aggression on edge. They'd like to 
challenge all that feminine combative- 
nes and prove ird be no match for 
them between the sheets." 

The rest of the sample thought men 
were turned on by skiing (four percent), 
ice skating (three percent), women's bas- 


ketball (three percent) and volleyball 
(two percent). 
E 


Q: MEN, WHICH SPECTA- 
TOR SPORT IS THE MOST 
AROUSING? 


Twenty-five percent of the men said 
seeing a female run turned them on: 
"When a chick runs in her pubictease 
jogging shorts and skimpy nipple-reveal- 
ing tank top, I really go wild. The mus- 


cles are always tight and firm as she 
pushes hard to make her laps. Afterward, 
she shimmers in a sexy sweat and I im 


nc giving her a rubdown. 


My fingers 


would gradually get her tingling all ov 

and my cock would merge with the 

sweat.” 
Twenty-fou 


percent of the men stated 
sistible: “Luscious 
g those skintight reveal- 
ing leotards, somersaulting about, spread- 
ing their legs, while doing perfect 
maneuvers, affect me like a porno loop. 
about me and those beautiful 
brais performing perverse tricks—like 
when full backbend curve, 
y g cock while I 
licked her chaste little twat.” 
Fighteen percent of the men reported 
i itillating: “A girl pr 


she's 


whites gets me very horny 
how she keeps her eyes 
ball then whacks it with incredible 
strength. I would love to have her focus 
rd on another set of balls. 
Ten percent of the men said they 
got excited by girls who swam: “A sleck 
suit on a shapely water nymph doing 
flip turns makes my dick as stiff as a 
diving board. As I gaze, it's easy to dre 
up strokes she could use on me. 
Fight percent of the men said ice 
skating provided a se thrill: “Pegg 
Fleming once made me come just observ- 
ing her leap and twirl. since then, 
ice skating has led me to think of sen- 
suous young 
to join them out on the frozen rink. We 
remove our clothes and dance. My hot 
penis would melt her cool reserve. ra 
get her juices flowing, enter her and 
climax in a torrid dizzy spin.” 
The rest of the men reported a 
of athletic turn-ons. Four 
ferred watching a woman act rough 


variety 
percent. pre- 
па 


tough rousing combative roller 
derby, while another four percent were 
sent into al vibration by the fem- 


inine skier who cut a gorgeous figure 
through the snow, 

‘Three percent cited softball, with fe- 
males sliding into bases and diving lor 
the ball, as the highest turn-on, Two per- 
cent said а girl surfer, standing up on the 
board in а teeny-tiny bikini, her undu 

ig body riding out a wave, was the s 
while another two perce 
said that basketball—with women closely 


arouse 


‚ maneuvering lay- 
ups in drenched u 
them off. 


Summary: A sign 


iforms—got 


icant theme running 


tight 
cvealing de- 
tched to its 


a 


trigger and makes it easy to imagi 
that particular athlete would p. 
nude in bed. 
With men, the provocative г 
d their leading preferences are varied. 


зой», 


liness of the long-distance fucker. When 
guys choose gymnasts as their turn-on 
favorites, which 24 percent did, the ob- 
vious source of the thrill is the exqu 
agility of the fillyli 

However, male gymnasts curr 

ach favor with the women in our survey. 
Only two percent of them reported an 
erogenous tingle observing those grace- 
ful. slim-physiqued acrobats. Evidently 
ladies get ol when a male athlete per- 
forms like а ing car—body lines are 
enhanced when there is real power un- 
der the hood. For females, their main 
choices were football, tennis, basketball 
nd boxing. Aggressive play is the tan- 
izing common denominator. 

When we asked everyone to figure out 
how the opposite sex would answer our 
question, both sides guessed fairly accu- 
rately, except that women overestimated 
the number of guys who got hot looking 
at a girl swim. And men missed the mark 
by underestimating, basketball as a fem- 
inine v phrodisiac. 

Irs clear that as the amount of leisi 
пе increases, both sports and sex will 
tinue to flourish. Perhaps if morality 
keeps changing at the same rapid pace, 
not only will the Olympics go back to 
games played in the nude but fucking 
will be the m: event. However, until 
then, those unsung champions of sex will 
have to get their gold medals in bed. 

An invitation to readers: So much for 
the wide and sexy world of sports. Now 
its time to turn to pursuits of the mind. 
Over the past few уса 
were once forbidden h 
monplace. Masturbation, 
mental illness, 
ly everyone. More and more people are 
paying lip service to oral sex. And 
sex surveys indicate an increasing 
ber of couples willing to exper 
with that most taboo of techniques 
sex. What's next? Is there a 
that you would like to see fall? What 
forbidden areas do you think the oppo- 
site sex would like to explore? Let your 
ginations roam. Nothing you say will 
be held against you, Send your responses 
to The Playboy Reader Sex Poll, 919 
North Michigan Avenue, Chicago, Ili- 
nois 60611. — HOWARD SMITH 


once a 


SEX POLL FEEDBACK 


our readers respond to sex polls past 


SEX AND CINEMA 


Thanks for conducting a Sex Poll on 
erotic movies (Invitation to 
June 1978), You have то wonder who 


ilm n udi 


Lots of 
. The obligatory cum. 
shots, with the man pulling his cock out 
of her cunt and spurting onto her tum- 
my. How unrcalistic! 

On the other hand, occasionally there 
are glimpses of real turn-ons. Georgii 
Spelvin iy an example, particularly 
her classic The Devil in Miss Jones. 
was obvious to all of us watchi 
film t 
ing h escap: 
flooding all her senses and thrilling to 
everything happening to her. While she 
was being fucked silly during her first 
session, she was sucking wildly on a rub- 
ber stimulator. Later. she and another 
girl were almost fighting to see who got 
the most Jicks on an erect cock and who 
got most of the semen that resulted from 
their The point is that the 
obvious enjoyment of sex by the partici- 
pants, in an environment that is realistic 
in terms of our common experiences with 
sex, is the key to turning on the male. 

The common themes in current pori 
films are с lesbi Temale 
masturbation and straight fucking, with 
numerous cum shots in which the ејасц 
tion is shown presumably. 10 prove to 
us viewers that it really happened. 1 
would propose a new concept. one in 
which the female is totally entranced by 


sex 


her reaction to all her senses—sight 
touch, hearing, taste and smell—ay she 
engages in sexual activity, amd is par- 


ticularly turned on by semen and vaginal 
lubrication. The real turn-on for me is 
when 1 see the people in the film turn 
on, and 1 relate to that. 

There arc numerous variations on this 
concep example: 
The film opens with a single woman, 
who is fully dressed, beautiful and 1 
voluptuous body: she becomes sexually 
aroused by some visual stimulus 
slowly and luxuriously begi 
her body, with the came 
icularly her face, 
nd runs her fingers 


but here is a typica 


pulls up her dress 
up her thighs to her crotch: then she 
pulls her panties aside t0 rub her fingers 
in the slippery wetness of her cunt. She 
then brings those fingers up to her nose 


1 moans and 
pout how good 


heavily à 
herself a 


and breathes 
talks softly t 


her cunt juices smell. She rep 
actions while caressing her br 
the other hand: she exposes a nipple 
covers it with some of her cunt juice. She 
slowly brings her face and brea 
gether, inhaling the lovely 
then, sticking out her ton 


masturbation, 
concentrating on stimulating her 


slow 


anus; she runs her fingers around it, then 
allows a finger to touch and slightly 
penetrate the opening. Again, she ex- 
plores the erotic smell of herself, this 
time of her anus, and inhales deeply. 
The session climaxes as she таман 

her clitoris to or 
stimulating alternately he 
nd her anus. The whole point 
she is thoroughly enjoying herself, and 
her total enjoyment is obvious to me 

vicwer.—B. J.. Virginia Beach, Virginia. 


1 get turned on by a porno movie 
when it features а big-breasted woman 
with two or three men. Race is not im 
portant, I really appreciate seeing one 


man inserted anally, one orally and one 
vaginally. Throw a little mild bond- 
age into this situation and vou. have 


helpless, not scared woman with th 
men slowly caressing and penetra 
every part of her body. What turns n 
olf are 15-minute blow jobs. Snore! But 
nothing turns me off as much as a film 


climaxing with sperm flying in all direc 

ions and dripping down a woman's face. 
І would imagine men liked 15-minute 
blow jobs. One man and multiple wom- 


en and sperm in the face. Yecch.—Miss 
A. H., New York. New York. 
PICKUP SHTICKS 

Um writing in response to the ques- 


the May Sex Poll. The 
best line I have ever used to pick up a 
lady was a straightforward “How'd vou 
like vour belly button tickled from the 
inside?" However, I find that a catchy 
line isn't what I take into ca 
when it comes to being picked up. It's 
more what the lady has to offer. 1t doesn't 
lly matter how she says it, just wheth- 
er or not she lets me know if she wants 
me.—.L. L., Chicago. Illinois. 


SEXUAL LANDMARKS 


Tam writing this letter i 
the question 


tions posed 


der 


response to 
Playboy Sex 
U Sex- 
ld have 
s ago, when I was 
roughnecking in West Texas. 1 met these 
two girls from Quebec, who were touring 
the U.S. My friend Jeff and I paired off 
with these chicks Laer that night. Up 
until that time, E thought sex was just 
get it in, bang, bang, get a nut and roll 
off, So Inter that night, 1 mounted 
Estelle, 1 couldn't get it in, her cunt w 
just too tight and dry. I had never hit 
roadblock of this type and didn't know 
to do. She just smiled, t 
nd and showed me how to st 
woman by gently massaging the cli 
That was the beginning of three days of 
ecstasy, experimenting with different po- 
sitions and oral sex. I was sorry to see her 
go. but she had changed my way of cop- 
ulation.—A. C., Mansfield, Ohio. 


l was bent in 1 direction 
early in my sexual care landmark 
of my life (sexual or otherwise) had to 
be the first time I went down on a lady. 
Silky thighs, pubic hair, softly yielding 
nether lips parted to reveal an erect litle 
clitoris, And best of all, that delici 
г nee. My greatest јоу is to take an 
rly morning muff dive with my favorite 
ly and then be careful not to touch 
my mustache when I am washing for 
work, so that her sweet perfume stays 
with me for the rest of the day—T. L., 
Maryville, Missouri. 


61 


~ “EYER OLD IMPORTED IK SOTLE FROM СА 


BY HIRAM WALKER IMPORTERS ING. DETROIT. MICH 


б PROOF BLENDED CAN 


NWR 1578 7. 


the “Lost Dutchman” old mine. 


Legend saysit’s.near the place where 
we hid a case of cer 


X 


We heard tales of hidden gold in the 
mountains east of Phoenix. They tell 
how miners who discovered it were 
mysteriously massacred. How an old 
prospector, “The Dutchman,’ rediscov- 
ered it. And how he, too, took its secret 
tothe grave. 

We searched the same canyons 
the Dutchman had followed. 

These mountains seemed a natural 
place to hide a case of Canadian Club. 
So we found a wrangler, and with our 


C.C. tied on a surefooted 
mule, we set out. We would 
seek a hiding place among the 
sites of the Dutchman’s legend 
.. and perhaps his lost gold 
mine too. His last words were 
about a needle-like rock near 
his mine. So we kept such a 
rock in sight as we followed 
narrow canyons. lts been a 
spell since adventurers here 
have met up with gold-crazed 
outlaws. Still, our wrangler's revolver 
was comforting as shadows deepened. 
A campfire, cowboy beans and С.С. 
with mountain stream water. 

With dark, we pitched camp below 
the needle-rock, put our chow on the 
fire, and toasted our saddle sores with 
C.C. and icy clear stream water. Next 
day we rode northwest to a well-trav- 
eled “Indian trail” and soon buried the 
Canadian Club. To find it, seek a place 
on that trail where the needle-rock is in 


sight, then head for lakes that weren't 
here when the Dutchman was. 
A strange rock, an abandoned camp. 


Seek the rock pictured here (warn- 
ing: itwon't look this way from the trail) 


and ride directly toward it. Fol- 

low a rocky trail that's really 

more stream bed in places, past 

a lone cactus that grows from a 

high rock outcropping, to the 

end. Near here we made camp 

again ‘neath a small tree where 

the distant needle-rock can 

again be seen. Within sight of 

our fire, we buried our full f > E 7 х 
case of Canadian Club. E Ы de 


We wish you better luck in 7 / 

1 ple 

your search for the buried case ee a Canadian led F- 

of Canadian Club than those > EE uv Ё 
who've sought the Dutchman's 7 жес 


TR MEL gold. But be warned: this : 575 Aero Heer) In 
a rugged country is unforgiving, 4а 

So if the trail seems too rigorous, you can strike it rich at any bar 

or package store. Just say, “C.C., please.” 

Beginning Sept. 4. get more clues by calling 800-221-4686. In N.Y. call 800-522-7517. 


Кы бев 


“What’s the name а Ы ts 


ў І и his charm 
oft en Z or the a 
pipe tobacco =- - «Maybe I Pipe tobacco, «Оо I'm in love 
he’s wearing? should smoke hes wearing? ee that 
@ pipe... $ pipe tobacco 
EXT "D wish my man а Le he’s wearing!” 
would wear ` 


his pipe tobacco." 


ре Tobacco. 
wears well. 


New Argosy Black is taste. With an aroma 
a superior blend of selected so pleasing, so distinctive, 
dark tobaccos. people around you will 
New Argosy Black Gold think of it as part of you. 
combines choice dark, burley 
and bright leaf tobaccos. Argosy Black & 
Whichever one you smoke Argosy Black Gold. 


The pipetobacco that wears well. 


Argosy ıs a trademark of U S. Tobacco Company 
0197805. Tobacco Company 


will give you a soft, mellow 


THE PLAYBOY FORUM 


acontinuing dialog on contemporary issues between playboy and its readers 


URINALS FOR WOMEN?! 

Wisconsin has had a proud tradition 
as a leader in liberal legislation, being 
the first state to adopt Workmen's Coi 
pensation, among other things. While 
Wisconsin has approved the E.R.A., one 
wonders if it is nece I just ross 
the following administrative rule that 
provides urinals for women: 


H 62.08(11) Urinals 

ukıxaıs (a) Women. Urinals for 
women may be installed as 
iliary or supplementary fixtur 
type fixture is not to be used as a 
substitute for water closets. In all 
cases, the minimum number of water 
closets required shall be provided 

1. Enclosure. The urinal shall be 
enclosed with a standard-size water- 
closet compartment and door to in- 
sure privacy in use. An instruction 
card explaining how to use the fis 
ture shall be posted in cach such 
compartment. 


Charles G. Center 
Auorney at Law 
Madison, Wisconsin 
Alas, since you wrote to us, some hu- 
morless turkey persuaded state officials to 
wrap this enlightened piece of legislation. 


NEXT QUESTION 
Please advise if the swallowing of 
m can cause plaque to form on teeth. 
Kindly do not print my name. 
(Name withheld by reque 
Fair Lawn, New Jersey 
We can't persuade the Playboy Advisor 
that you're not putting us on and the 
most he'll say is that you should have no 
problems if you brush after cating and 
watch those between-meal snacks. 


spe 


MEET THE REAL DICK TRACY 
There's a funny story circulating in 
the local legal community that might be 
of some interest to your readers. It scems 
that one of our gallant law-enforcement 
officers made a collar on a suspected 
prostitute alter she had allegedly sta 
giving him a blow job in a lı 
bathtub known as a "love tub 
questioning at a preliminary he 
detective testified. that though the 
took place in three feet of water, the 


You can probably 
the defense attorney had with this, but 
just in case you can't, I've enclosed а 
copy of the motion the lawyer filed ask- 
ing that the officer “submit to a physical 


examination by а physician or a survey. 
or who can certify to the jury that the 
length of the officer's penis is . . . pre- 
sumptively short of three and one half 
feet.” 


(Name withheld by request) 
Columbus, Ohio 


FUN-LOVING FIREMEN 
This letter is in reg: 


to your response 


to the woman who comments on the 
sexuality of firemen in the June Playboy 
Forum. Your naive comment is, “Our 


“Tf there were 
a true sexual revolution, 
prostitutes wouldn’t 
be in business.” 


gallant fire fighters as new national sex 
symbols—we'll have to think about that 
one.” Boy, who just threw you guys off 
the turnip truck? Firemen are not the 
new national sex symbols, they are the 
national sex symbols! 

ve been around Гог only 23 years, but 
ever since I developed an interest in 
men, firemen have been tops on my list. 
All my women friends and I agree that if 
there is one profession with the most 
ractive males, it has to be that of 


fireman. I imagine th 
your women readers, you would fi 
a great deal of them shared this 

Patti Fortunati 
ancisco, California 


t if you polled 
id that 
Ww. 


As you found out, we firemen are a 
ch of carefree, fun-loving, sex-crazed, 
horny creatures out to get what we 
before the "big one" gets us. But an 
image as sex symbols we don't need. 
After all, who would you want gi 


morning—a sex maniac who hı 
а woman for several hours or one of 
America’s herocs? 


We have an image to protect and we 
keep a low profile, because why ruin a 
good thi 


g? And we are good. But chau- 
Really, now! 

Kerry A. Buck, Fireman 
Palm Springs, Ca 


RETURN OF THE MINUTEMEI 

I am writing this letter to express my 
dissatisfaction and that of my associates 
over the lesbian pictorials that vou have 
put in your magazine. И you are trying 
to be liberal and freethinking, then you 
should have the guts to put in just 
many malehomosexual pictorials. Let 
me state now that 1 am not a homosex- 
ual and that a true heterosexual male 
docs not 


nt to sit by and watch wom- 


еп waste themselves on other women. 
He would rather service those women 
himself. There is something wrong with 
а man who likes to watch women have 
sex with cach other. The Ameri 
woman is screwed up enough as it i 
If there were a true sexual revolution 
as you and the rest of the med 
claim, prostitutes wouldn't be in busi 
ness. Contrary to all of the feminist 
raving, women just don't 
s me 


ike sex as 
1 ат talking about 
ght animal sex and no bull- 

Any man can satisfy а won 
an. The problem is getting them 10 let 
you. Women are responsible for most 
of the barriers keeping men and women 
from getting together to fuck. The m 
jority of the men їп America would 
fuck a dillerent woman every week if 
they could. Women have the opportuni- 
ty to do this with men, but they don't 
want to. 

Prostitution should be legalized all 
Over America man should be 
denied a woman ast once a month, 
regardless of his economic and social 


65 


PLAYBOY 


66 


status and misfortunes such as imprison- 
ment and physical deformities. It fills 
me with rage to think of all the lonely 
and dejected disabled veterans in and 
out of hospitals. The Government 
should provide them with the finest cour- 
tesans if the American women can't find 
time off from all the phony “groupie” 
causes they espouse. There should also 
be male bordellos for women. The 
streets of America are going to “run red 
with blood" in the future. Men and 
women should be getting together now 
as much as they can. 
Lt. Bert Diedtrich 

Minutemen 
Angeles, Californi: 

We always thought minutemen were 
fellows afflicted with premature. ejacu- 
lation. And before our women readers 
start raising hell about the above letter, 
read the one that follows. 


PACKING IT IN 

I read with some amusement the letter 
in the April Playboy Forum on the sub- 
ject of penis size from the woman in San 
Jose and with even more amusement 
reply that no letter you had ever 
dt with this subject so rea- 
sonably from a woman's point of view. 
You choose to ignore the basic hypocrisy 
of your magazine; i.e., that the size of a 
breasts is a turn-on and the 
an's cock isn’t a determining 
factor in sexual enjoyment. This is 
absolute nonsense. 

When I was still in my teens and quite 
inexperienced sex, 1 married a 
"shrimpie" whose fully extended. penis 
was not more than five inches. 1 ат not 
an Amazon, by any means (I stand only 
54" and weigh 118 pounds) and my 
husband was of average build and height. 
I stupidly believed that all men w 
bout the same size and the rcasoi 
wasn't getting me off was some fai 
on ту part. A few months into the mar- 
riage, b had my first affair with a guy 
with an extended penis that I have come 
to conclude is average length, about 
seven inches. Those two inches made a 
world of difference for me and from 
that moment on, seven inches was the 
imum length I'd accept. 

Since divorcing, I have had a number 
s, but only with men whom I've 
checked out beforehand. Why te 
time, after all, with a man who may be 
very nice, handsome and very experi- 
enced in sex but who doesn't have the 
heavy-duty equipment I require? 1 want 
a big cock in me, the bigger the better, 
nd I've discovered that, generally spea 
ing, the larger the man, the bigger hi 
I look at his hands first; bigger 


size of 


And before T let him get me into 
bed, I very discreetly arouse him to 
check out what's dow . If he isn’ 
all there, he doesn't score. As I say, I 


FORUM NEWSFRONT 


what’s happening in the sexual and social arenas 


JUSTICE ALMOST PREVAILS 

CLOVIS, NEW MEXICO—A mistrial was 
declared in the unusual case of a 23- 
year-old woman charged with contribut- 
ing to the delinquency of а minor—a 
15-year-old youth with whom she al- 
ledgedly had sexual relations. The de- 
[endant's original indictment had been 
town out earlier by an appellate 
court that ruled that sex may have con- 
tributed to the boys education but not 
to his delinquency. That decision was 
later reversed by the state supreme 
court. An informal poll of the trial 
jury indicated the vole had been 11 to 
1 for acquittal. 


SNAKES AND THE LAW 

Austin—The Texas Supreme Court 
has agreed with the state appeals court 
that agreed with a trial judge who had 
disagreed with a jury by refusing lo 
giant $20,000 damages lo a snakebite 
victim. The plainuff had been struck 
by а raitler while reaching for a jar of 
jelly in a Del Rio store. Testimony had 
suggested that the snake had slithered 
in through an open back door in pur- 
suit of а mouse and the jury had held 


the store liable. But the judges all de- 
cided that a storekeepers duty 10 pro- 
tect customers from such creatures does 
not begin until he knows of their 
presence. 


PROMISE ENFORCED 
WATERBURY, CONNECTICUT—A_ superi- 
or-couri judge has held that a man who 
married a woman knowing she was 
pregnant by another man and who 


promised 1o act as the child's. father 
may not later deny paternity to avoid 
paying child support. The case arose 
when the couple divorced after two 
years and the ex-husband objected to 
supporting the child on the ground 
that it was “not an issue of the mar- 
riage” The judge decided that the 
marriage had been contingent on the 
husband's promise to claim the child 
as his own and that that was a binding 
agreement. 


POT PENALTY 

LTON, WASHINGTON—Afler a 24- 
year-old man pleaded guilty to 
possessing more than 40 grams of mavi- 
juano—in the form of £3. plants con- 
fiscated from his farm—a county judge 
decided not to invoke the state's maxi 
mum penalty of up to five years in 
prison. Instead, he ordered ins man to 
appear at the courthouse for the next 
four Sundays and do 20 laps around 
the building pushing a wheelbarrow 
filled with dirt, one pot plant and, at 
the defendant's request, a small sign: 
DECRIMINALIZE MARIJUANA. Commented 
the judge, “You can believe what you 
want, but you have to obey the 
law. ... He can have the damn sign on 
it if he wants.” 


YANKEE, STAY HOME 

WASHINGTON, v.C—The National Or- 
ganization for the Reform of Mari- 
Juana Laws (МОК МТ.) has asked U.S. 
citizens lo stay out of Mexico and not 
to buy Mexican fruits, vegetables and 
meats as a protest against the country's 
continuing use of the potentially dan- 
gerous herbicide paraquat оп mari- 
juana fields. NORML national director 
Keith Stroup said that although this 
action would hardly bring Mexico “10 
its knees,” it's an important protest and 
would call attention to the faci that 
Mexican authorities are showing even 
less concern than the U. S. Government 
over the possible harm caused by crop- 
eradication programs. 


NO FLUSHING THE STASH 

FAYE LE, GEORGIA—Police as- 
sisted school officials in raiding о high 
school for drugs—after first turning off 
the water lo prevent students from 
flushing any evidence. Pot-sniffing dogs 
were used lo check among the 1700 stu- 
dents, their lockers and other possible 
hiding places. Police chief Charles Gil- 
bert said officers found mostly joints, 
many of them tossed out of windows 


“We didn’t use any Gestapo tactics,” he 
said, “but I think we did leave a psy- 
chological effect on the students. 


FUGITIVE WITH A FLAIR 
KANSAS CITY—Federal authorities are 
trying to add up the debts incurred by 
а prisoner who scems to have pulled off 
one of the most stylish prison breaks 
on record. After stealing a pickup truck 


from the motor pool of the Leaven- 
worth Federal prison honor farm, the 
31-year-old. escapee rented a limousine 
complete with chauffeur to drive him 
10 Tulsa and there rented a suite of 
rooms al а motel. He arranged to have 
these charged to his limo bill before 
moving lo a second motel, where he had 
his bil charged to the first, all the 
while posing as an entertainment im- 
presario selling up a reception [or a 
counhy singer. Keeping one step ahead 
of the FBI, he checked out, rented a 
hwin-engined aircraft and hired a pilot 
lo fly him to Dallas, where the Feds 
were waiting. The fugitive had been 
serving five years for auto theft and 
was nearly eligible for parole. 


BOOBS ON THE TUBE 

BONITA. SPRINGS, FLORIDA—Local tele- 
vision viewers expecting to хее an old 
Lloyd Bridges thriller called “Daring 
Game" were surprised instead 10 wit- 
ness half an hour of naked women 
frolicking in а hayloft and shouting 
obscenities. The station manager 
blamed the incident on a mix-up by 
the film distributor. 


POWER TO THE PROSECUTOR 
WASHINGTON, D.C.— The U.S. Supreme 
Courl has increased the plea-bargaining 
power of criminal prosecutors by ruling 
Ihat they may threaten a defendant 
with a more serious indictment if he 
refuses to plead guilty to ап initial 


charge and demands a trial. The five- 
to-four decision came in the case of 
a Kentucky man who received a life 
sentence after he refused to plead 
guilty to forging an $88 check and ac- 
сер a five-year sentence. Two previous 
felony convictions made the defendant 
subject to indictment as a habitual of- 
fender. Writing for the majority, Jus- 
tice Potter Stewart maintained that “in 
the ‘give-and-take’ of plea bargaining, 
there is no such element of punishment 
or retaliation as long as the accused is 
free to accept or reject the prosecu- 
tion's offer." In dissent, Justice Harry 
A. Blackmun said the ruling condoned 
proseculorial vindictiveness.” 


MORE POLICE POWER 

A number of state and national legis- 
lators are drafting bills designed to 
prevent police from routinely search- 
ing newspaper or magazine offices for 
evidence in criminal cases, as recently 
authorized by the U.S. Supreme Court. 
Ruling in a California case, the Court 
held that police do not have to issue 
subpoenas to examine journalistic files 
and records but can obtain search war- 
rants and seize the materials in raids. A 
spokesman for the U.S. Department of 
Justice quickly announced that ils 
agents would not alter their practices 
but would continue to seek such 
dence by means of subpoenas before те- 
sorling to search warrants. The case, 
stemming from a police search of the 
offices of the Stanford University stn- 
dent newspaper in 1971, was supported 
by the Playboy Foundation during its 


appeal. 


LOVE YOUR LOCAL POLICE 

TAMPA, FLORIDA—A 27-year-old wom- 
an was sentenced 1o five days in jail for 
calling the local police department to 
say “I love you.” Officers said she 
called 19 limes during one eight-hour 
period, including cight limes in one 
hour, tying up the police emergency 
line. 


GAYS AT THE BAR 

MlAMI—/n a six-to-one decision, the 
Supreme Court of Florida has ruled 
that homosexuality does not preclude 
acceplance by the state bar. In a suit 
brought by the American Civil Liber- 
lies Union of Southern Florida, the 
court held that sexual preference does 
nol in itself constitute a failure to meet 
the“ good moral character” standards for 
practicing law in the state. The deci- 
sion specified that any disciplining of 
members because of personal. moral 
standards should take place only when 
there was a “substantial connection” 
between private behavior and the 
ability to carry out professional respon- 
sibilities. 


ASSAULT WITH A GREASY WEAPON 

ROCHESTER, NEW YORK—A 26-year-old 
man has been arrested for “harass- 
ment” of a police officer with French- 
fried potatoes. The officer said that 
when he stopped in an all-night diner 
to use the telephone, a catsup-soaked 
French fry smacked into the wall next 
to him. He then warned a customer lo 
cease fire, but instead, the man used his 
fork as a catapult to score a messy hit 
on the officer's uniform. According to 
the police report, "the subject was ar- 
vested while reloading.” 


SUICIDE BY DRUGS 

ATLANTA—A nationwide analysis of 
3000 psychoactive — drugassociated 
deaths suggests that many of those re- 
corded as accidental overdoses are, in 
fact, suicides. The study, conducted in 
nine cities by the University of Califor- 
nia at Irvine under a contract with the 
National Institute on Drug Abuse, con- 
cluded that “a reasonable. estimate of 
the percentage of suicides among all 
drug-involued deaths in these cities 


ranged from 35 to 45 percent,” but an 
absence of evidence led authorities 
often to list such deaths as accidents. 


WOULD YOU BELIEVE? 

PRINCETON, NEW JERSEY—A Gallup 
Poll has found Americans to have quite 
а propensity for believing in super- 
natural and paranormal phenomena. 
For those believing in UFOs, the figure 
was 57 percent; angels, 54 percent; ESP, 
51 percent; devils, 39 percent; precogni- 
lion, 37. percent; vu, 30 percent; 
astrology, 29 percent; ghosts, 11 per- 
cent; and witches, 10 percent. The 
Loch Ness Monster and Bigfoot ran 
neck and neck at 13 percent each. The 
ilis were based on in-person inter- 
views with 1533 adults in 300 commu- 
nilies across the country. 


67 


PLAYBOY 


68 


Look at it this way: 
Your TV can tape shows when you're not home, 
guard the house. and bark like a dog. 
And you're still drinking ordinary scotch? 


Pinch 12 year old Scotch 


86 PROOF BLENDED SCOTCH WHISKY —RENFIELO IMPORTERS, LTD.. N.Y. 


don't waste time with shrimp meat 

I'm sure you'll find that most women 
feel as I do (though they won't admit 
it, so as not 10 damage the fragile psy 
chologies of their mates)—that bigger 
is better, all other things being equal 
That's why vibrators start at eight inches. 
But don’t get me wrong—irs a hot, 
hard, lor 
ness and appreciation of other people's 
ht 
is 


fat cock I want. Perceptive- 


feelings is bullshit. When you come 


down to it, guys, a big rack of me: 
all you need. The rest will take care of 
itself. 

(Name withheld by request) 


Orange County, New York 


THIS IS GETTING OUT OF HAND 
That does it! Until now, we tris have 
been content to stay in our closets, but 


that idiots letter, "Irisexuals Come 
Out" (The Playboy Forum. June). 
threatens our very identity. The situa 
tion was made even worse by your Copy 
Editors memo gratuitously presuming 
to lay down a set of "sexuality" defini- 
tions. Since definitions serve the purpose 
of precision in communication, sloppy 
definitions cannot be tolerated. 

For future reference and in thc ter 
ests of accuracy in sexual education, 
please advise your Copy Fditor of the 


correct definition: “A trisexual is а per 
son who loves tricycles and only tricycles 
(usually three times at a sitting)" 
R. Beier, President 
Intragalaxy Trisesuals United 
Sausalito, California 


FETICIDE 

The anti-abortionists contend that a 
fetus has a 
all the la 
tion is nothing less th: 
a step further, it would only seem logi 
cal to investigate any other cause of 
fetal death. For instance, if а woman 
had а miscarriage through her own 
negligence, she would be charged with 


ight to life supported by 


ws of this nation, and thus abor 


б murder, Goin 


murder, or at least manslaughter 
Doesn't that make sense? 
Peter Wilens 
Detroit, Michigan 


MEDICINAL MARIJUANA 

A friend of mine fractured a vertebra 
in a car accident and experienced terri 
which the hospital ueated 
with the usual narcotics and other drugs. 
When he was able to sit in a wheelchair, 
1 and other friends would take him out 
onto the hospital balcony for visits and 
also for a few tokes of grass. To cvery 


one’s surprise, the marijuana seemed to 


йу reduce his need for other 


considers 
painkillers, apparently by helping him 
relax. To our further surprise, we dis- 
covered that other patients in the bro 
ken-bone department were using the 
balcony for the same purpose—and that 
most of the nurses and even some ol the 


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70 


Forum Library 


NEW CREDIT RIGHTS FDR WOMEN: 
Passage of the Equal Credit Oppor- 
tunity Act in 1975 was one thing; how 
to exercise one's rights under that law 
is quite another. This 73-page manual 
covers just about every aspect of the 
subject—the different kinds of credit, 
how to obtain it, remedies for discrimi- 
nation, even what to do about defec- 
tive products, fine-print surprises and 
‘strong-arm bill collectors. Send $2.75 
(plus ten cents to cover state tax in 
Illinois) to Consumer Credit Project, 
Inc., 261 Kimberly, Barrington, Illinois 
60010. 


LEGAL CHALLENGES TD THE MARIJUANA 
Laws: Here's a handy bibliography for 
attorneys and anyone else doing legal 
research on pot and pot laws. It's a 
practical reference manual and guide 
10 cases that have challenged the con- 
stitutionality of various drug statutes or 
raised the issues of marijuana identifi- 
vation, search-and-seizure, entrapment, 
sentencing and the defense of medical 
necessity. Available for ten dollars 
from the National Organization for the 
Reform of Marijuana Laws, 2317 M 
Street N.W., Washington, D.C. 20037. 


THE PRISONER'S YELLOW PAGES: For 
those on the inside looking out, or 
getting out with no place to go, heres 
а 37-page state-by-state directory of 
agencies, organizations, halfway 
houses, law libraries and legal-aid 
groups offering assistance to both 
cons and ex-cons who need a help- 
ing hand. The Playboy Foundation 
provided the initial printing and these 
copies are free to prisoners while 
the supply lasts. Others should en- 
close a donation to help keep the 
Project going. Write to Universal Press, 
Box 5570, Los Angeles, California 
90055. 


HELP FDR THE PROSTATE: Proslale 
problems terrify and mystify so many 
people that C.S.LE. has now put out 
a pamphlet on the subject. Just send 
a stamped, self-addressed, business- 
size envelope and 25 cents to the 
Committee for Sexual Information and 
Education. 1 Palomar Arcade Number 
107, Santa Cruz, California 95060, and 
ask for booklet B34. 


A WHISTLEBLOWER'S GUIDE TD THE 
FEDERAL BUREAUCRACY: Or how to be a 
thorn in the Governments side and 
keep those suckers honest. What we 
have here is a lively littlé 39-page 
booklet aimed primarily at persons 
either employed by the Government or 
working with it who become aware of 
improper agency practices but don't 
know how lo go about exposing or 
correcting them. It's billed as "a map- 
ping of rules, regulations and common- 
sense strategizing for the scientists, 
accountants, clerks and others who 


play the bureaucracy's most dangerous 
game: whistleblowing.” The Playboy 
Foundalion subsidized the printing, and 
for three dollars, you can obtain a copy 
from the Government Accountability 
Project, Institute for Policy Studies, 
1901 Que Street N.W., Washington, 
D.C. 20009. 


YOUR LEGAL RIGHTS AND RESPONSI- 
BiLITIES: This 25-page “Guide for Public 
School Students" spells out for stu- 
dents and parents their legal rights— 
and obligations—concerning exami- 
nation of school records, expulsion, 
the exercise of free speech, and so 
forth, as protected by various laws or 
established through court decisions. 
It's available free from сиг very own 
Government. Just send a postcard to 
the Consumer Information Center, 
Department 652F, Pueblo, Colorado 
81009, and ask for it by title. 


YOUR LEGAL 
RIGHTS & 
RESPONSIBILITIES 


A GUIDE FOR PUBLIC 
SCHOOL STUDENTS 


THE RIGHTS DF VETERANS: This is the 
latest in a series of full-size paperbacks 
оп legal rights produced by the Ameri- 
can Civil Liberties Union and marketed 
by Avon Books. The format is basically 
question-and-answer—everything from 
AW.O.L. problems to military records 
and discharge upgrades, in 269 
Pages that reveal the little-known 
procedures of the Veterans Adminis- 
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erans’ organizations and counseling 
services. Earlier books in the series 
describe the rights of mental pa- 
tients, aliens, students, gay people, 
hospital patients, criminal suspects, 
teachers, women and other downtroc- 
den types. To order the veterans" 
book, send two dollars to the A.C.L.U. 
Literature Department, 22 East 40th 
Street, New York, New York 10016, 
and ask for it by title. 


doctors not only were aware of this but 
made a point of ignoring it. 

I would expect that by now research- 
ers would have found out if pot has 
any direct pain-killing properties. I 
would also expect that it doesn’t. But 
from what I saw, I think it's quite likely 
it has some secondary medical uses in 
this area by relieving tension, improving 
morale and making an injured person 
feel better emotionally. The hosp 
personnel seem to have discovered this 
in “field testing,” because they were 
certainly not opposed to this form of 
treatment. 


(Name and address 
withheld by request) 


LICENSE-PLATE B.S. 
In response to the letter on person 

alized licenseplate "in"-manship and 

oneupmanship in the July Playboy 

Forum, I have only the following to 

offer: BED— Big Fucking Deal! 

hard Hayhoe 

San Francisco, California 


VOTER GUARANTEE 

I a business or an individual adver 
tises a product or a service and enters 
into a contract to furnish same, the 
terms of that contract сап be enforced 
under a multitude of laws and 
tions, Likewise, a political candi 
ters into a contractual agre 
sorts when he issues promises to the 
public in return for votes and tax dollars 
to implement those promises. So why 
can we not hold a political 
an ofliceholder accountable in the same 
ways as through truth-inendii 
in-advertising апа performance-w 
laws? If the ervices. unrendered. 

ad promises unfulfilled, the 
without waiting for an offici 
expire, should be able 
breach of contract and replace him. 


LOTS OF LAUGHS 

Elizabeth McNeill's bondage experi 
ence (Nine and a Half Weeks, pLavuoy, 
April) reminds me of my own, though 
my role was the reverse of hers. My 
college roommate, Dee, took me and а 
girlfriend, Lind 
while her folks w 
Terry was there 


of strip poker. Since a sister and brother 
were present, we agreed to undress only 
as [ar as our underwear, any additional 
losses to be paid by submitting to what- 
ever suitable penalty was decided on by 
the win We were all down to the 
limit when Terry lost the final hand. 
After some debate, we decided his 
punishment: He would be tickle-tortured 
for an hour. Since he was so much 
stronger than we were, it was further 
decreed that he be tied up during his 


penalty session. We spr 


ad-cagled him 
on his parents! double bed, usi 


E p y 
hose supplied by his sister. As the tick- 
ling began, Terry developed an erection 
that was extremely conspicuous, because 
I he had on were his boxer shorts. 
Dec became e 
ic him 
id 1 were very turned on by that tim 
so we refused. Dee went to bed herself, 
leaving her brothe 

We were getting 
finally Linda spotted 
We decided to massage i the 
lotion, tickling him at the same time. 
Inevitably, I suppose, we decided that 


to un 


nd sillier, 
boule of lotion. 


his shorts were Linda took a 
pair of scissors and cut them off, despite 
Terry's struggles and protests. 1 was very 


roused by that time and 1 was dying 
with anticipation as she massaged closer 
d closer to his ci At long 
last, she soaked her in lotion, 
sped his hard penis and slowly began 
l up and down. In just a n 
ше, Terry threw his head back 
ejaculated. E had ne ched a n 
come before and [ was amazed at 
force and volume of the fuid 
squirted out. 

Then Terry wanted to be let loose, 
but 1 begged Linda to keep him tied. I 
took over massaging him, and when his 
erectio I brought him to an- 
other org 


and 


wi 


1 
the 
that 


return 
n. After we cleaned him up. 
we all fell asleep. Sometime during the 
ht, I woke up an playing with 
Ferry again, while Linda slept soundly 
beside us. He was still tied, of course, so 
1 teased him for al n hour before 
masturbating him j 

1 have never had such 
since and T long for the opportun 

i up and play with him to 


e ol le Ir 


me withheld by request) 
Waterbury, Connecticut 
We don't know whether to envy Terry 
or to sympathize with him. Probably the 
Jormer, since he didn't file charges. 


ANOTHER VIEW 

1 certainly don't agree with th 
who want to persecute “q 
ways, homosexuals are easier to deal with 
than the average horny n 
he finds himself face to face with 
. turns int 
ng. pawing. dirty-joke 
ng stud, especially if he's had a drink 
or two, I hate those bastards, because 
me feel like a little 
оо stupid 10 
1 know 


fanatics 
s^ In many 


le who, when 
їе 


understand 
some women who prefer homosexuals as 


what's go 


[ is because they treat 


who go out of their way to hate queers 
must be the same oncs who get some 
kind of kinky pleasure out of being 
pawed, insulted and demcaned by macho 
types, whom they either accept sexually, 
in а very sick kind of exchange that 
gratifies their masochistic needs, or sa- 
distically reject when the poor 
е just about ready to come in their 
ts. 

I have some friends who are terribly 
flattered by such piggish attention but 
who don't want the intimacy of sex. 
Those same women are the only ones I 
know who hate homosexuals, and I think 
it's because homos aren't constantly try- 
ing to get them into bed, which can ci- 
feelings. 
thheld by request) 
Toledo, Ohio 


e a woman or hurt I 


GOOD BS. 


The following comes to us from an 
associate professor of English who 
wishes—nay, begs—to remain anon- 
ymous. He explained that he already 
has enough trouble getting his stu- 
dents to take him seriously. 

Over the years that I've been read- 
ing PLAYBOY, | have regularly noted 
the reckless usage of the terms bull- 
shit, horseshit. and so on. by writers 
of articles as well as by readers in 
The Playboy Forum. And | am sur- 
prised that a magazine as well edited 
as yours has made no apparent ef- 
fort to define and standardize these 
pejorative variations on the word shit 
for the benefit of scholars, abecedar- 
ians, etymologists and others of us 
intellectual compulsives who strive to 
reduce or eliminate semantic con- 
fusion. 

Presuming that PLAYBOY, like most 
publications. has a stylebook and 
also a style policy and is conscious 
of the process by which vulgar and 
vernacular expressions gradually 
wend their way into the language 
through popular usage and, eventual- 
ly, into dictionaries, 1 would like to 
offer what little assistance | can in 
helping you good people sort out all 
this shit, so to speak. 

Ignoring fly shit, flea shit, elephant 
shit and other sophomoric efforts to 
elaborate on the fundamental shit 
concept, let me suggest the defining 
of only three basic shit categories 
that include what | consider the prin- 
cipal follies that our fellow country- 
men are attempting to describe. 

Bullshit: Crap that deceives no- 
body and is enjoyed by everybody; 

Chickenshit: Petty crap dumped on 
subordinates by persons in positions 
of authority; 

Horseshit: Bad bullshit, as dissem- 
inated by governments, corporate 
managements, politicians and other 
congenital liars dedicated to deceiv- 
ing or misleading the public. 

The above, we've decided, is a 
classic example of good bullshit. 


ANOTHER BRIGHT IDEA 

In deference to those who, like An 
Bryant, fear the influence of homosex- 
uals upon children, I have been suggest- 
ing for the past year that one suppertime 
newscast per week be preempted by a 
film of heterose: intercourse between 
two popular stars such as Farrah Fawcett- 
Majors and Lee Majors. By emphasizing 
the loving, caring, married status of the 
performers, by limiting th i 
the missionary position and by using no 
visible contraceptive devices, my pro- 
posal would provide—in a context that 
should be morally and legally acceptable 
10 all—proper heterosexual role models 
whom children can learn to emulate in 
riage. It would also give supper 
viewers a welcome respite from the 
steady diet of crime and si 
dominates most newscasts, 


your m: 
Т have hı 
attempts by Christians 
liberties. Here are some examples 
Bryant, using quotations 
Irom her Bible, is crusading to remove 
laws that prevent discrimination against 
homosexuals. 

olics are сатр: 


пу 
civil 


imit 


: ning to єп 
into law religiously based. anti-abortion 
commitments. 

5. Christi; 
ing censorship of so 
in books and films. 


ct 


dlvertisements in 
nain some 


d 
nly if they c 
iristian phrase or symbol. 


«сер! 
ion 


his public 


€ 


Par who 


Christian 


nts 
re kidn 


are 
ping 


predominantly 
lult offspring 


(with litle interference from legal aw 
thorities) and attempting to depr 
them of belief in unconvention 
gions. 
It seems from these examples. that 


Christians are attempting to force the 
beliefs on everyone and that, in the proc- 
ess, they s the persecution of 
some minorities. Alo, these acts do nor 
seem like acts of love and charity from 
religion that stresses these virtue 
Don L'Heureux 
Regina, Saskatchewan 


si 


а 


TRUE, AFTER ALL! 

The episode described in the Ma 
Playboy Forum in which a suspected 
nal was hooked up to a "lie de- 
tector” comprised ol 
banery- jump a photocopy 
machine, copying the words “He's ly 
ing.” was not а hoax. That “hoax” was 
perpetrated on one of our clients, an 
impoverished illiterate "graduate" of a 
third-grade ches in Puerto Rico who 
was accused of arson, Rendering a dis 
position favorable to the defendant, the 


cables 


a 


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judge stated to the attorneys tying the 
case, "I hope this doesn't mean that 
the public defenders condone arson.” 

Richard R. Fink 

Chief Public Defender 

Doylestown, Pennsylvan 

Thanks. The errors in the original 

wire-service report made the incident 
impossible 10 verify, so we reported it 
as а good story but possibly а hoox— 
because the police officials we queried 
(in the wrong town) only laughed and 
said that their detectives were not imagi 
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all loved the story. We're only slightly 
disappointed to learn that it actually hap- 
pened and is not а modern variation of 
a folk tale. 


CLARIFICATION 

The special report “Pot Laws in Other 
Lands” published in the March Playboy 
Forum incorrectly states in a chart that 
the only penalty for private possession 
of marijuana in Ecuador is po: 


during the in- 
1. considerable medi- 
nd legal expenses and long-term 
imprisonment. 

J. Anthony Allitto 

Country Officer for Ecuador 

Department of State 

Washington, D.C 

Since the chart we published was based 

on information compiled by the State 
Department, we checked into this and 
offer the following amplification from 
Edwin С. Corr, U. S. Chargé d'Affaires in 
Quito: “I believe that the office in the 
State Department that supplied the origi- 
nal information condensed it a bit too 
much. ... Although it is true that users 
are treated as sick persons and not as 
criminals, the ‘treatment’ and the legal 
release therefrom can often take many 
months with extremely high financial 
costs of subsistence and legal fees to the 
individual.” So there you have it, folk 
Here you're a criminal, there youre a 
patient; but cither way, you're locked up. 


COURAGE OF CONVICTIONS 

In the letter titled. “Pot Talk" (The 
Playboy Forum, May), a police officer 
sting pot laws may be bad, but 
not be changed by individuals 
n." Oh, but how wrong he 
precisely how the 


laws are right now being 
weakened for that very reason. It starts 
with individuals who are not afraid to 
flaunt their lifestyles in public. 
Flaunting a bag of marij 
enough of us did it, would 1 ne 
effect on society as flaunting a Star of 
David in Denmark did during the last 


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So sit in it. Drive it. Experience it. 

And widen your horizons the quickest way we know. 
Behind the wheel of an MGB. 

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74 


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world war, when the Nazis ordered 
Jews to so identify themselves. It s 
with individuals. In Denmark, it 
with the king. 


John Harmon Walker 
Lemon Grove, California 


CURE OR KILL 

I thought the Chicago Sun-Times had 
an editorial 
it ran opposing the 0.5. Government's 
mad policy of helping the Mexicans 
poison marijuana with рага 
cluded its remarks b 
ing the use of ma 
poisoning the suppl r. 
sider the analogy: If ‘revenooers’ find a 
moonshine still, do they secretly 
cyanide to its product?" 
he sad thing is, I'm sure that some 
fanatics would do just that. 


go, Minois 

Fanatics have already done just that, 
or something very close. During Prohibi- 
tion, the Government set up an elaborate 
“denaturing” system for adding poisons 
to the alcohol that could be manufac 
tured legally for medical and industrial 
purposes; and the fact that thousands of 
people died, went blind or otherwise 
were severely harmed by unknowis 
consuming illegal booze made from that 
poisonous alcohol didn't worry the pro- 
hibitionists a bil. The drinkers were 
merely being punished for their. sins. 
Just as the early Christians righteously 
burned and tortured heretics, the U. S. 
Government has a pretty good record of 
destroying people in order to save them 
from themselves. 


ACCIDENTS DO HAPPEN 
joyed the comments 
s expressing their opinions 
The Playboy Forum, but when I с 
upon Ronald C. Thomas, } 
(July) concerning сег 
couldn't help wondering if the only rea- 
son you decided to publish such an item 
was to give your public a ру 

I think someone should 
as down and explain to him that acci- 
dents happen to the best of drivers, 
whether qualified, certified or not. Al- 
lowing such a person to drive at a higher 
te of speed would only make the effects 
of an accident more devastating, 

Bernie D. Davenport 
Louisville, Kentucky 

We have io admit that we published 
Thomas’ letter mostly for its amusement 
value. я 


Mr. Thom- 


DISCRIMINATION AD INFINITUM 

1 got a chuckle out of the letter from 
the conservationist who decided he was 
getting carried away when he felt а pang, 
of remorse at the news that some kind of 
smallpox bug had been eradicated from 
the planet (The Playboy Forum, August). 
Stuck on my wall is a small clipping. 


Since when 
do you drink 


Jim Beam? 
“Since I discovered i its SO о miixablc 


People like Jeannie enjoy 
smooth, light, mellow Jim Beam 
for exactly the same reason 
you do: taste. 

For six uninterrupted 
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World's Finest Bourbon. 
People like you 
have been drinking 
Beam since 1795. 


BOURBON WHISKEY 
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Millions 
ot Americans 


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price of 


hdeli 


and dont get it. 


This year, almost three million 
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fidelity and come home with nifty little 
compact stereos. 

Another four hundred thousand 
will put their hard earned money into 
massive fruitwood consoles. 

And still others will spend almost 
$240 million on cheap “private label” 
components. 

A lot of the money these people 
spend will be wasted. Mainly because 
they won't be getting the high fidelity 
they think they're paying for. 

They'll be getting electronics that 
are often no better than what's in your 
kitchen radio. 

And the pity is that for about the 


same money, they could have had the 
real thing. 


What is high fidelity? 


The minute you hear high fidelity, 
you'll know what it’s all about. 

Real high fidelity is an experience. 
It's hearing, and feeling music the way 
you've probably never heard or felt it 
before. The way you can usually only 
experience it at a live performance. 

The only high fidelity equipment 
made today that can give you these 
experiences are separate brand name 
components. Separate turntables, 
receivers, speakers and tape decks, 
each designed to do its one job perfectly. 

Each built by companies who 


care about music. Like Pioneer. 


You don't have to be an expert 
to buy it. 


Just go to any reputable high 
fidelity dealer. A dealer who not only 
carries brands like Pioneer, but who also 
features a separate soundroom for you 
to sit back and really /isten to the 
equipment. 

Tell the salesman how much you 
want to spend, how big your room is, 
and what kind of music you usually 
listen to. 

If he starts talking about ohms or 
microfarads, ask him to be quiet. You're 


op. BS Olord Duse, Moora: New ler sey 07074, 


not interested in hearing about ohms or 
microfarads. You're interested in hearing 
music. 

Compare the sound of Pioneer's 
hi fi components to components made 
by any other ш hi fi company. 

We think that you'll not only hear 
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that you'll also hear why Pioneer 
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And isn’t that why you want to buy 
high fidelity equipment in the first 
place? Because you care about music? 


High Ficeity Components 


(pIONCER 
We bring it back alive. 


The car that destroyed 
the competition in the race 
that destroys cars... 


Renault won the 24 Hours of Le Mans, 
the worlds premiere endurance race. More 
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AtLe Man: r must push itself to speeds of 
5 miles per hour down mile-long straight, 
then brake to 55 mph as it snakes its y through 
5.4 miles of twists and bends — again and again 
for 24 hours. 

Of the 55 cars that started at Le Mans this 
year, only 25 lasted long enough to finish. And 
theone that finished first wasa Renault. 


More miles in one day than you 
probably drive in 3 months. 
The 1978 winner was a Renault. 


finished 5 full laps—that's 42 
5-time winner Porsche and Jackie lek 


Alpine, which 


Le Car by 


winning driver. We also set a new distance record 
of 3,128 mile: 

Another Renault-Alpine lapped Le Mans at 
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Porsche and Ickx by 9 mph! 


Drive a bit of the Le Mans winner. 


The same engineering and advanced auto- 
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Renault, whose prices start at only 
Like the Renault-Alpine, Le Car, too, has 
proven itself in auto racing. Le Car has won some 
62 Sports Car Club of America Showroom Stock 
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i MGB,and Fiat X 1/9. 
high performance comes from an 
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like the Renault-Alpine, unheard of as 
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Yet,Le Car 
car, with more room than some luxury 
an incredibly smooth ride that Cur & D. 
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Soif you can't drive the Le Mai 
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Е 
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8 


Renault? 


courtesy of my girlfriend, reporting that 
the Humane Society of the United States 
is concerned over "speciesism" creepi 
into the debate over animal rights. 
that some groups consider primates, dol- 
phins, et aL, a higher order of creature 
and more deserving of protection than 
worms, frogs or laboratory rats, Another 
faction labels this elitism and discrimina- 
tion and contends that since all animals 
have a unique role in the ecosystem, all 
should be protected equally. Where will 
it all end? 


Joseph Johnson 
Los Angeles, California 
We have a geologist 
climber, 


Who knows? 
friend who, as а mountain 
sneers at speleologists because he consid- 


ers igneous rock superior to sedimentary. 


MORALITY LAWS 
Just reading your report on the Jim 
Hill case scared the living hell out of 
me (Playboy Casebook, May). 1 travel 
constantly and my first stop each evening 
is at the motel or hotel bar, to sce if 
there's a friendly lady around. I've spent 
many nights with some fine women and 
по and Hill's sit 
uation tells me that I've been very lucky 
(Name withheld by request) 

Columbus, Ohio 


few very weird one: 


DEATH BUFF 

Dear Name Withheld By Request, who 
is presently serving time in the Апап 
penitentiary and doesn't think anyone 
who has met his former cellmate the re- 
morseful murderer could pull the switch 
on him (The Playboy Forum, July). 

Hell, man, I'll come down and pull it 
any old time, if they'll just pay my plane 
fare and give me all the gold and silver 
that melts out of a killer's mouth, 

(Name withheld by request) 
Shawnee Mission, Kansas 

That's what we like about the death 

penalty; it brings out the best in people. 


a 


IN MEMORIAM 

I regret to advise that one of our 
guards here at the Oregon State Pen was 
caught giving head to one of the inmates 
and has been relieved of his duties. In 
behalf of myself and my fellow prisoners, 
I would like to express our regret that 
this has occurred. He was one of our 
friendliest guards and we'll all miss him 
very much. 


Ali Oop 
Salem, Oregon 


offers the 


dialog 


“The Playboy Forum” 
opportunity jor an 
between and editors of this 
publication on contemporary issues. Ad- 
dress all correspondence to The Playboy 
Forum, Playboy Building, 919 North 
Michigan Avenue, Chicago, Illinois 60611. 


extended 


readers 


Bill Sumner logs over 35,000 business miles a year. 
He's pretty choosey about his accommodations, and he 
can be a tough hotel customer. 

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Our rooms, for one thing. They're 
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mii (800) 228-2000 | 


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In Canada, call collect or ask the operator for Zenith 06040. 


79 


PLAYBOY 


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nanor mawe DOLLY PARTON 


with the curvaceous queen of country music 


a candid conversation 


Two days before the Palomino club 
in Los Angeles sponsored its first Dolly 
Parton Look-Alike Contest, Dolly Parton 
was wondering whether or not she should 
attend, Shed been to some others in 
different parts of the country and she'd 
been тозу disappointed. In. Los An- 
geles, however, it might be different. 
But she knew if she attended, she would 
also enter, And she was wondering if 
there was any chance she might lose. 
“Wouldn't that be hysterical?” she said. 
“But 1 doubt if I would. 1 mean, I look 
too much like her.” 

The contest was on a Wednesday 
night. Dolly was rehearsing for a TV 
special and wasn't sure if she'd be 
through in time to run over with a 
[riend to the North Hollywood club. On 
Thursday, she'd be invited to her 
friend Emmylou Harris’ house. Emmylou 
said there were some people she wanted 
Dolly to тесі. Although her schedule 
was as tight as her clothes, Dolly accepted 
without hesitation. 

There was much talk in Los Angeles 
about the top-secret album Dolly and 
Emmylou and Linda Ronstadt were 
working on. They'd been meeting and 
recording in full-day sessions that had 
been closed to the press. But there 
had been managerial problems as well as 


“I just like to feel things next to те. 
Even before 1 had a figure, 1 liked my 
clothes snug and tight. People would 
always kid me in school about my little 
butt and my little blue jeans.” 


scheduling conflicts and the album was 
still an on/off project. 

Ronstadt and Harris had wanted to 
meet Parton after having recorded some 
of her songs. When the three met, they 
hit it off immediately and have become 
friends. Parton was concerned that Har 
ris and Ronstadt might pui her down 
for the way she looks—for her gaudy 
rhinestone outfits, the blonde teased wigs, 
the five-inch heels, the heavy make-up. 
She was afraid that Johnny Carson and 
Barbara Walters would put her down 
Jor the same thing. Bul they didn't—and 
Jew others have. People apparently see 
beyond the ostentatious appearance. “1 
don't think it takes people long to know 
I'm not ignorant," she хаух. 

But Parton felt that without her props, 
й would have taken her longer to attract 
a broad audience, so, nol one for waiting, 
she did what she could to promote her- 
self. In so doing, she became the exag- 
geralion that Bette Midler is trying lo 
be and that Mae West was. Parton is the 
incarnation of West in certain ways: She 
doesn't show much, but she hints at a lot; 
she pokes fun at herself and makes a 
fortune at the jokes; she knows what she 
wants and she won't let anything inter- 
fere with her becoming as big a star as 
she can possibly become. 


“I think there is due a person like Elvis, 
a female, which there has never been. A 
person with magnetism and charisma to 
Аташ people to her. And your next ques- 
tion: Do I think it is me?” 


Parton has come a long 
Tennessee mountain home; she was born 
in а Locust Ridge “holler” in Sevier 
County in the Smoky Mountain foothills 
on January 19, 1916. The fourth of 12 
children, she was the first in her family 
to finish high school, the first lo become 
1 never had a doubt 1 would 
she reasons, “because refusing 
to think I couldn't make it is the reason 
1 could." 

Fer Parton, making it meant getting 
out of the backwoods and into the lime- 
light. Her rise was rapid: She began 
wriling songs al. seven, recording them 
and singing on the Cas Walker radio and 
television show at ten, making her first 
appearance at the Grand Ole Opry at 12. 

The day after she graduated from high 
school, she left with her uncle, Bill 
Owens, for Nashville to become a star. 
That same day she met, and within two 
years married, an asphalt worker named 
Carl Dean. Dean is a publicityshy, 
earthy тап who is as independent as 
Dolly and the two seem lo have a solid, 
often ata-distance relationship. She's on 
the road most of the year and he's at 
home working their land. 

When country singer Norma Jean, 
who sang with Porter Wagoner on the 
tond and on his syndicated TV show, 


vay from her 


EX Bh. up 

PHOTOGRAPHY EY HARRY LANGOON 

“I learned about the facts of life in the 

barn. We had uncles and cousins that 

were maybe two or three years older than 

us that knew a lot of stuff... . And soon 
as we gota chance, we'd try it. 


81 


PLAYBOY 


82 


decided to quit and get married in 1967, 
Wagoner asked Dolly if she'd like to join 
his show. Overnight, her salary rose from 
пехі to nothing to $60,000 a year and, at 
21, she had achieved one of her goals: a 
broad and popular audience. 

Although she and Wagoner became 
hugely successful and their duo albums 
sold well, she became restless and made 
a decision to go oul on the road with 
members of her family, It proved to be 
almost disastrous, She and her Travelin’ 
Family Band went from state fair to 
rodeo to high school gymnasium ama- 
teurishly managed and poorly booked. 
Making her most painful decision to 
date, she told her family it wasn’t work- 
ing out and took time off to put together 
а more professional band. She also hired 
а Los Angeles-based manager and public- 
relations firm, who saw enormous poten- 
tial in this energetic and prolific woman. 

By then, she was ready lo “cross over" 
into the pop/rock world. Her albums 
were popular in Japan, France, Australia 
and England (where she was twice named 
Female Vocalist of the Year) and she 
coproduced her own album, “New Har- 
vest" She followed that with her “new 
sound”: “Here You Come Again,” which 
recently went platinum, more than quad- 
rupled the sales of many of her earlier 
albums. 

With 20th Century-Fox offering her a 
three-movie deal, publishers bidding jor 
the novel she's writing, her aulobiogra- 
phy in the works, TV network executives 
trying to line her up for specials and 
record albums starting to sell in the 
millions, pLAvBoY decided to send free- 
lance wriler Lawrence Grobel 10 talk with 
Dolly and see how it all happened and 
how it has affected he) 

Grobel, who previously interviewed 
Henry Winkler and Barbra Streisand for 
PLAYBOY, began the interview in Los 
Angeles and then joined Dolly at the be- 
ginning of her six-month nationwide 
road Lour. His report: 

“Fue met busy people before, but in 
Dolly's case, her scheduling is extreme, 
Her energy matches her ambition, which 
is limitless. If she's not wriling or record- 
ing her own songs, she's recording with 
Linda and Emmylou, rehearsing with her 
band, taping а TV show, throwing a 
wedding for her younger sister, giving a 
concert for ABC-vadio executives in Las 
Vegas or touring. 

“I managed lo pin her down for five 
hours in an apartment she rents in Los 
Angel The first thing 1 noticed was 
how sparse it was; nothing plush or com- 
fortable, no indication that а siar lived 
there, obviously a place used for little 
more than sleeping. The only bit of 
eccentricity was а small, low, round 
trampolin, which she said she used after 
giving up on jumping rope, ‘for a couple 
of good reasons? 

Dolly wasn't born with a voice like 
Streisand's, but what she has is an enor- 


mously infectious personality. To meet 
her is to immediately like her. Although 
she appears larger than life, she is actu- 
ally a compact woman—dazling in ap- 
pearance; but if you took away the wig 
and the Frederick's of Hollywood five- 
inch heels, she'd stand just five feet tall. 
Of course, her height isn’t the first thing 
one nolices upon meeting her. As she 
herself kids onstage, ‘I know that you-all 
brought your binoculars to see me; bul 
what you didn't realize is you don't need 
binoculars” 

“The next time I saw Dolly was in 
Winchester, Virginia, where she was 
scheduled to appear at the Apple Blos- 
som Festival. By then, it was as if we 
were old and trusting friends and I soon 
discovered that she was the least hung-up 
celebrity I've ever been with. She was 
open, honest and only rarely asked 10 go 
off the record; and even then, it was on 
matters such as being unsatisfied with a 
particular dress designer or not wanting 
1o dwell too much on godly topics. When 
it came to her personal life, her dreams, 
her ambitions, she never hesitated. 

“One litile girl who had written to 
Dolly came to visit her after a show. 
Dolly was in a nightdress and greeted 
the child as her father took Polaroid 
pictures. Bul the picture Pll always re- 
member was of the father telling his wife 
to take a shot of him behind Dolly. He 
had this crazy gleam in his eyes, his 
tongue popped out of his mouth and 1 
was sure he was going to сор a feel. But 
he restrained himself, as most people do 
around her, Because she is so open and 
unparanoid, she manages to tame the 
wildest instincts of men. 

“Our last night together stretched out 
until morning. We talked [rom ten т.м. 
until five AM, exchanging stories and 
not in the least bit tired. By the time we 
hugged goodbye, I was saddened that 
we were talked ош. Our talk is what 
follows . . . though it does take а while 
to get over Dolly's appearance.” 


PLAYBOY: Hello, Dolly. 
PARTON: Hi. ГЇЇ save you the trouble of 


askin’: Why do I choose to look so 
outrageous? 
PLAYBOY: Is that the first question inter- 


viewers usu 
Tha 
pout. 

PLAYBOY: Actually, that was going to be 
our second question, We were going to 
start with the PLAynoy cover. It's pretty 
eye-catching. Was it fun? 

PARTON: I was afraid at first, when we 
talked about it. I didn't want to be 
naked or something on the front of a 
magazine unless everybody knew it was 
a joke. I mean, I wouldn't want to be 
naked even then. It might not offend 
me, but 1 was afr be a lot of 
my country fans and some of the people 
who love me who are of a reli) 
nature might not understand. 


Пу ask you? 
s what we usually end up 


People will make jokes and things, 
not because of my beauty but just be- 
cause of that physical thing that's built 
around my boobs. I didn't know if I 
wanted to be put in a category of where 
I was flaunting something 1 had never 
flaunted before, Then 1 thought, lt isn't 
something 1 should be ashamed of. 
PLAYBOY'S a real classy magazine. And I 
mean, who else but Dolly Parton should 
be on the cover of rLavnov? If you 
wanted an outrageous person to be an 
outrageous magazine cover, who else? I 
just hope people will take it in the spirit 
in which I did it—you know, some 
cute and off-the-wall for me. 
PLAYBOY: OK. Now, why do you choose 
to look so outrageous? 

PARTON: People have thought I'd be a 
lot farther along in this business if 1 
essed more stylish and didn't wear all 
this gaudy getup. Record companies 
have tried to change me. I just refused. 
И 1 am going to look like this, 1 must 
have had a reason. It's this: If 1 can't 
make it on my talent, then I don't want 
to do it I have to look the way I choose 
to look, and this is what I've chos 
makes me different а litle bit, 
t what we all want to do: be a little 
nt? 

It's [un for me. It's like a little kid. 
playing with her paints and colors. I 
like to sit and tease my hair. If there's 
something new on the market in make- 
up, 1 like to try it. You've got to have a 
gimmick. You've got to have something 
that will catch the суе and hold the 
attention of the public. But the funny 
thing is, no matter how much I try new 
stuff, I wind up looking just the same. 
PLAYBOY: Do you think you'll become а 
fashion tr Isn't there already 
a Dolly Ра 1 
PARTON: [Laughing] Can you imagine 
ng to look this way for 
n people first get to know me 
‚ "Why do you w 
alter a week of knowing me, they 
totally understand. They know it's just 
a bunch of baloney, But why not? Life's 
boring enough, it makes you try to spice 
it up. I guess I just throw on a little 
too much spice. 

PLAYBOY: Why are there so many Dolly 


Parton look-alike contests? 

PARTON: Because they're fun. Who would 
be better to impersonate than Dolly 
Parton? All you gotta do is get a big 
blonde wig, make-up, and if you're 
pretty well proporuoned . . . or you can 


even fake it. The best parts of Dolly 
Parton look-al 
dressed up like gir 
do me. 

PLAYBOY: 
winners? 
PARTON: I sure have. They were the big 
gest bunch of pigs I ever saw, most of 
them. I thought to myself, Is that how 
people think ] look? 1 thought, Oh, 
Lord, some of them were in worse shape 


contests are guys 


Is so easy to 


Have you ever met any of the 


Ladies Choice 


Women can't keep their eyes — апа their hands — off of guys who wear Angels Flight™ 
Small wonder. Nothing in years has made men look as good. 
The fit is so snug and provocative — it's downright sinful. 
The feel is positively sensual. The silhouette started the disco look. 
The material is dressy gabardine —a welcome relief from jeans, but at about the same price. 
So give yourself a competitive edge —get into Angels Flight™ pants, vests and blazers. 
Chances are, you'll have to fight the girls off. 


PLAYBOY 


84 


n I even thought I was. Гуе only 
seen two that would суеп be classified 
s а human being. 

PLAYBOY: So you don't think they've ever 
been able to imitate the real, sexy you? 
PARTON: Listen, I never thought of my- 
self as béing a sex symbol. It never 
crossed my mind that anybody might 
think I was sexy. 

: But surely 


d 
e to be 


ter all the 


you. 
PARTON: I didn't say what you-all 
thought. I said that it never once crossed 
my mind, even now. I still can't get it 
through my head that people think I'm 
supposed to be sexy or somethin’. 1 
don't want that responsibility. I don't. 
want to have to keep up an lik 
that. I don't want to have to be like 
а beautiful woman, like Raquel 
Welch—which is no trouble, I never 
would anyway. I'm just sayin’ I wouldn't 
want people to look at me and if I 
gained ten pounds, theyd say, "Oh 
God, she's ruined her looks." I'm made 
up of many things. I'm very complex. I 
have much more depth than just my 
looks, which to me are not all that hot, 
y way. I've always looked a certain way 


and had an image. I like the big hairdo, 
the gaudy clothes. e's not much 
sexy about tl not usually 


turned on by 
always been like that. 

PLAYBOY: If that’s true, why do you sup- 
pose there's such a huge cosmetic i 
dustry in this country 
PARTON: I'm talking about my kind—the 
big wigs, the total artificial look, I don't 
try to dress in style or to be really classy. 
I've got my work to do and I like to look 
good, but I don't try to keep an image 
other than just this gimmick appearance 
that 1 have. If I was trying to really 
impress men or be totally sexy, then I 
would dress differently 
PLAYBOY: How would you look? 

PARTON: 1 would wear low-cut things. 
Iry to keep my weight down. Try to 
really work on my body. I would find a 
new, softer, sexier hair style—it would 
be my own hair, some way. But why 
bother? I'm ady married and he 
don't mind how I look. He likes me 
gaudy or ungaudy. 

PLAYBOY: When were you first аш 
to gaudiness? 

PARTON: | was always fascinated with 
make-up. We didn't have any when I 
grew up. We weren't allowed to wear it. 
But we used to have this medicine, what 
you call Merthiolate, that's what I 
would put on my lips as a little kid. Га 
paint my lips and there was nothin" 
Daddy could do. He couldn't rub it off. 
He would say, "Get that lipstick off 
you!” And I'd say, "It won't come off, 
it's my natural coloring, Daddy." Then 
he'd say, “Bull” When we wanted cye- 
brows, we'd get burned matches and 


1 looks and I've 


ted. 


When I was a 
the teases 


make little eyebrows. 
sophomore in high school, 
came into style and I started dı 
er since, I've done it. And 1 
wore my skirts so tight I could. hardly 
wiggle in them. I liked tight sweaters. I 
just like tight clothes, I always did. 

1 just like to feel things next to me, 
I guess. Even before | had a figure, I 
liked my clothes snug and tight. People 
would always kid me in school about my 
little butt and my litle blue jeans or 
whatever, Momma, she always under- 
stood stult like that. She'd say, "Don't 
get them so tight you can't move in 
them, where they cut your wind oll. 
But she'd seam them up and if they 
weren't quite tight enough, Fd say, 
“Won't you fix them a litle right. in 
here?” And she would. See, she was a 
daughter of a preacher and when she 
was a child, they wouldn't let her wear 
ny makeup. They all had long hair 
then 1 she wanted her hair cut. Th 
ver! t her and Daddy got m: 
ried, hair oll and she kept 
it short ever She said, 
then that when I had kids, I would not 


“People will always talk 
and make jokes about my 
. But why dwell 
on that? Why don't they look 
underneath the breasts, at 
the heart?” 


bosoms. 


make ‘em do th 
casy with 


ings that they were un- 


PLAYBO' 


What did you 
your tight clothes? 
PARTON: Daddy didn't like us to wi 
real tight clothes back at the start. He 
was more strict with us, he just didn't 
understand how to be a father. A father 
of girls, especially. He just didn't want 
us to date. He trusted us, but hc didn't 
trust the guys we was goin’ with. 
PLAYBOY. You must have looked more 
mature than a lot of your Classmates 
when you were a girl. 
PARTON: Well, I looked more mature, I 
was more matu T used my mind in 
different ways. I developed my mind by 
nking deep and planning 


father think of 


T thought serious. 1 
looked as old as the teach When I 


was in high school, I looked like I was 
s old. 

Was the fact that you were 
physically more developed than the other 
girls a problem for you? Were you teased 
much? 

PARTON: It was always a problem, to 
degree. But I had а real open personal- 
nk I was teased openly; it 


a” behind 
ot real, she's got 


was more what people w 
my back: “No, they’ 
Kleenex in th 
PLAYBOY: Did that bother you? 
PARTON: It was kind of embarrassing. but 
must not have bothered me too much. 
I'm a real obvious person 1 the things 
you see are obvious. But my body is not 
Пу as extreme as people make it out 
to be. Гат just a small, tiny, little per 
son, five feet tall. with a small frame. I 
have plenty, but it's not like what people 
say: "Oh. gosh. she must be 45 inches.” 
I'm not nowhere near it, you know. 

PLAYBOY: Whiy е you always refused to 
disclose your me: 


PARTON: Thi ist no point. I'm nor 
sayin’ it’s not there. A dot of people 
claim, "I remember when you wasn't 


that b And I say, “Yeah, 
remember when 1 wasn't this fat, to 
Im not that well endowed. Im not as 
huge as people make me out as being. I 
really ain't, 1 mean, if you look real 
good ... I've got plenty, but I know a 
lot of people that are so big it's un- 
healthy, it hurts their back, 1 ' so 
extreme, if 1 didn't have some. I would 
sure have made some, But from the time 
1 just a young girl they've been 
there. 
Some book said I had my bust lifted 
derbî Hospital. Well, 1 never 
en doctored at Vanderbilt. Hos. 
People will alw 
jokes about my Боо 


t you 


з. When somebody 
says that this doctor claims he did it, I 
always t plastic surgeons are all 
alike, they're always making mountains 
out of molchills. But, no, 1 didn't o to 
Vanderbilt Hospital. And. Id. «т 


my secrets. But a lot of people that know 


me would know the difference. We won't 
which that goes. So we will 
just leave the people wondering. But 


wh 


dwell on that? Why don't they look 
underneath the breasts, at the heart? 

PLAYBOY: All right. How would you de 
scribe yourself to someone who had 
never seen or he: 
PARTON: Well, dd start by 
that I pride myself on being a fair and 
honest person. | am free and open 
enough to be able to try new things. Im 
outrageous. 1 feel like I have a lot of 


saying 


y am- 
Tm 


ious. I can be strong when I n 

d weak when I want to be. 
tell you where to put it if | dı 
where you got it. l'm not a у у 
person. 1 don’t fall into great states of 
depression. Very sentimental and highly 
emotional. I'm a baby when it comes to 
bein’ a baby. I like to be spoiled and 
petted. I get touched r 
curious, I have to know everything tha 
goes on. I'm not a hrillia 


nt person, but 


a 


Tj. By ANHEUSER-BUSCH, INC. + ST LOUIS 4 SINCE 1896 


— 


The spirit of Marlboro 
in a low tar cigarettes: — 


Ma 


LIGHTS 


LOWEREO TAR û NICOTINE 


. < E ЖЕ. ь © „у 
"tar, 0.8 mg nicotine av. per cigarette. FIC Report May 7 
"5:12 mg: ar; 


Warning: The Surgeon General Has Determined 
That Cigarette Smoking Is Dangerous to Your Health. 


PLAYBOY 


88 


I have a lot of guts, I just don't have а 
fear of life. I love life, so why should I 
fear somethin’ I love? And why should 
I not reach out to the things that J know 
I can touch? I'm strong-willed. I can 
think like a workingman because 1 know 
what a workingman goes through. I'm a 
person you could sit down with even if 
you were a total stranger and tell me the 
thing you thought was the most horrible 
thing and I would understand it. And 1 
wouldn't tell. I'm a good friend. I'm 
loyal and devoted to the things that I 
believe іп... . I'm full of shit! 

PLAYBOY: That's quite a description. 
Now, how would you assess your talent? 
PARTON: I like to be appreciated as a 
writer and, if not a great singer, at least 
a stylist and an original, creative person. 


PARTON: I don't think so. My manager 
just hates me to say that, because he says 
it's not truc. I don't have a great voice. 
I have a different voice and | can do 
things with it that a lot of people can't. 
But it's.so delicate in other ways, there's 
no way I can do some of the things 
other singers can. 

I just love to sing. It is joyful, it's 
something I can scream, it's a release for 
me. I used to have а lot of vibrato 
in my voice. It could almost be re: 
irritating to a lot of people's cars. It 
was a natural thing for me, but some 
people say, "You sound like you been 
eating billy goat.” Bah, bah. I guess I 
overdone it, so I tried to learn at takin’ 
some of the vi о out. ] would like to 
prove my voice to be able to hit bet- 
ter notes. My notes are not always truc. 
But my heart is always truc. And the 
emotion I put in is always truc. 

PLAYBOY: Do you listen to yourself often? 
PARTON: No, never. Unless I'm in the 
studio uyin to decide what goes in the 
à not necessarily a fan of my 
own. ot one of my favorite singers. 
PLAYBOY: Is it truc that your husband 
doesn’t like your 
PARTON: He didn't used to, but he's be- 
come a real big fan of mine now. I 
played ¢ Пит, Heartbreaker, 
and he really liked it. 
PLAYBOY: Does that mean a lot to you? 
PARTON: It means more than anybody 
could ever know. 
PLAYBOY: You and Carl е been 
ried 12 years and no one’s ever seen а 
picture of the two of you together. Why 
the mystery? 
PARTON: He just don't have any desire to 
be in show business. He don't want to 
have his picture in the paper. He don't 
want to go out to the supermarket and 
have people say, "That's Dolly Parton's 
husband." There's been a lot of dis- 
torted press about how 1 only sce him 
six weeks a year, which is not truc. It’s 
true that Пам year 1 was only at home 
about six weeks, but he joined me on 
the road a lot, 


ging? 


nar- 


PLAYBOY: Is he as shy and bashful as the 
press makes him out to be? 

PARTON: No. He's just the funniest, wit- 
tiest guy in the world. He's really bright. 
He's not backward at all. I just really 
wish that people would let him be. He's 
а homelovin' person. He works outside, 
he's got his tractor and his grader, he 
keeps our farm in order. He wouldn't 
have to work no more, because I'm mak- 
ing good moncy now, but he gets up every 
morning at daylight. If he ain't woi 


on our place, he'll take a few jobs, 1 


e 
ding somebody's driveway or clean- 
1g off somebody's property, to pick up 
a couple of hundred bucks, He likes his 
own money to horse-trade with. 

PLAYBOY: Do people say anything to him 
about Dolly Parton's husband grading 
their driveway? 

PARTON: Oh, sure; he don't give a shit. 
He don't go up and say, “Hey, I'm 
Dolly Parton's husband, can ] grade 
your drive?” If somebody knows it, he 
don't make a big thing of it: hell play 
it down, he'll say, "Well, I ain't in show 
at can I 
Hell, she 


business, 1 got to work, now wi 


do for 


you?” Or hell say, 


"I used to have a lot 
of vibrato in my voice. 
Tt wasa natural thing 

forme, but some people 
say, ‘You sound like you 
been eating billy goat.” 


n't makin’ no money.” He's a man 
with a lot of pride; even though my 
money is his money, his money is mine. 
PLAYBOY: W is it about him that 
attracted you? 

PARTON: His honesty. His decency. His 
earthiness. I like the way he loves me. 
His understanding of me and the things 
1 do. The way he lets me be free, And 
lets me be me. He don't try to choke 
me and demand anything from me. 
PLAYBOY: Does he ever give you advice 
about your career? 

PARTON: He never interferes with me 
businesswise. Thats why 1 hire man- 
agers. Carl and I only talk about our 
own things. We talk about what we're 


gonna do with the house, the [arm. Or 
he м: see uck he's rebuilt. 
He's 1 ue boy. But he's like my 


‚ like a brother. And I'm all those 
ngs to him. 1 call addy. 
PLAYBOY: What does all you? 
PARTON: When he's talking to other 
people, he says "the old lady" or "she." 
Or He never says Dolly, 
never. And if he docs, it hurts my feel- 
a's so bad—aint that crazy? If I say 


zy wo 


Carl, he won't even react. He hates me 
to call him Сагі. He'll say, “Call me son 
of a bitch, call me anythin’, but don't 
call me Carl" That's what everybody 
calls him, so it's not personal enougl 
PLAYBOY: Is he a jealous person? 
PARTON: Not a bit, 

PLAYBOY: Are you? 

PARTON: I'm not, either. 

PLAYBOY: Would it matter if he were sec- 
ing someone else while you were away? 
PARTON: He's not. 

PLAYBOY: If he were, would you want to 
know? 

PARTON: No, I wouldn't want to know 
and he wouldn't want to tell me. But if 
he did, it wouldn't be like the 1 of 
the world for me. 1 would just say it was 
as much my fault as his. 1 would prob- 
ably ay and pout for a day for thc 
attention of it, and then it would be 
over. To me, life is life and people is 
people. You cannot control every emo- 
tion that you have. 

PLAYBOY: How would he feel if you had 
an айай? 

PARTON: The same way. He wouldn't 
ant to know. I think I would keep it 
from him. He would be more apt to tell 


than me. He knows 1 ain't goin’ no- 
where. No matter who 1 met or what 
kind of an affair I might ever have, ain't 


nobody in this world could take Carl's 
place. t no way in this world 
Га ever lose this man. 
PLAYBOY: Someone on the road as much 
25 you are could sleep around a lot 
PARTON: How do you know I don't? 
PLAYBOY: Because you speak so freely 
and guilulessly about your relationship 
Carl You'd have to really be a 
good actress to cover up a lot of aflairs. 
PARTON: Oh, 1 am. 1 guess men think 
they can get away with it or somethin’, 
That all depends on the person. I just 
feel wi for the goose is fair for 
the gander. Whether 1 do or whether I 
don't is my concern. If I was ever weak 
enough to do something like that, it 
would never involve him, he would never 
know it, he would never {cel any ейссїз 
from it. Those are very personal ques- 
ns and I'm a very private person, but 
I'm just like you—you don't always tell 
everything, do you? Let's put it this way: 
H 1 wanted to do it, I would; if 1 should 
do it, it would allect nobody but me 
and the person volved. Maybe it 
would be somethin’ that would even 
make me be a happier person, 
But couldn't it also lead to 
your life? 
PARTON: Well, kiss me, we'll sce, 
PLAYBOY: This is what's known as an 
awkward pause. 
PARTON: ‘There are a few people t I 
have been attracted to real strong, but I 
avoid that. There is no way in heaven's 
name that I could ever leave Carl, so 
why should I put myself and another 
person through that kind of torment? 
PLAYBOY: It sounds Jike marriage at a 


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PLAYBOY 


90 


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distance can be healthy. 

PARTON: It is. We're so used to the life 
style, if I'm home two or three weeks, 1 
want to get to work and he wants to get 
back to work, so he's just as anxious to 
see me go as I am to leave, It probably 
don't make much sense, but it makes 
sense to us. 

PLAYBOY: When you атс home, do you 
entertain much 

PARTON: When I'm home, we don't like 
people at the house other than our 
family and our own friends. We dont 
want fans comin' in our yard. And 
there's no artist in thc business that is 
any more devoted and loves their fans 
more than me. I've always tried to bı 
long to the public when I'm out ther 
nd Ive always tried to be honest 
enough with them to say, "I don't want 
you to come up to the house unless 
you've been invited, because I may be 
up there half-naked.” I shouldn't have 
said that: they'll probably be comin’ up 
to take pictures now. That's why we 
bought a piece of property where we 
could have the privacy to get out in 
the yard in shorts or looking tacky. 
PLAYBOY: How tacky? 
PARTON: Tacky-tacky 
looking like anybody. 
PLAYBOY: Is privacy a problem? 

PARTON: We do have fans that jump the 
fence. That's not a very polite thing 10 
do, but I don't get bent out of shape 
over it. I just figure if it’s that important 
to somebody, least you can do is try 
to be nice 

PLAYBOY: When you're performing, are 
your fans rowdy 

PARTON: It is getting so now the crowds 
are getting wilder and there are a lot of 
younger people and a lot of pushing 
and shoving. Some people get overex 
cited. They can run over a kid and bust 
his brains out or somethi without 
meaning to. It is kind of (rightenin, 
But they are the most devoted fans, 
standing there, rain or snow, freczing to 
death. It is amazing. 

PLAYBOY: Are audiences different in dit 
lerent parts of the country? 

PARTON: It's pretty much the same in 
every part of the country, except Texas 
Texas audiences are the loudest and 
most responsive, They are just fun-lovin 
people all the time. Texans are in 
world of their own. It's a great place 
lor music. 

PLAYBOY: What about fan m: 
ever get any letters that n 
sidered strange? 

PARTON: I used to get letters from а man 
who was in a mental institution. He was 
a big fan but just distorted. It was more 
perverted than anything else. 1 kept 
those. J get a lot of mail [rom prisoners 
and usually they are very nice letters 
Sometimes they get a litle horny 
PLAYBOY: Have you had any difficulties 
getting your fans to accept your new 
Are there diehard country music 


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buffs who can't accept your crossing over 
into the pop/rock field? 

PARTON: We had some of that when I 
started, when J first got the bigger band 
and started doin’ more rocky things. 
Some people hollered, “Do your coun- 
try, we don't need your rock ‘n’ roll." I 
don't do rock ^n' roll. I knew what I 
was tryin’ to do and I didn't have time 
to try to explain it to them. 

I have not changed be 
and I never will. The only thing success 
does to you, like Barbra Streisand said in 
her Playboy Interview, it just don't allow 
you to be alone anymore. Everybody is 
tryin’ to get to you. It just gets to the 
point where people demand so much 
from you you just can’t give it and you 
have to take all kinds of hurts and in- 
sults. It bothers you, Of all things. for 
somebody to say that I've changed, that 
just burns me up. 

PLAYBOY: But your music has changed to 
some degree. Didn't you say that your 
Here You Come Again album is slicker 
than you wanted it to sound? 

PARTON: Well, you see. 
thing that I did after I made the change 
and it was not exactly 
mind. But it proved to be the smartest 
thing. I knew Here You Come Again 
would be a hit song, but 1 don't know 
if I should be identified with it, because 
irs so smooth and pop-sounding. That's 
such a good song a monkey could have 
made it a hit, Well, you're looking at a 
million-dol monkey, 

PLAYBOY: Do you feel that in order to 
reach a larger audience you have to 
sweeten or smooth out your soun 
PARTON: Yeah, here and there. I was 
kind of afraid that people would think, 
Boy. this is too drastic. I just didn't want 
the country people to think that I total- 
ly left them. That was such a polished 
pop sound! But it was the biggest coun- 
uy record I ever had, as well. 

PLAYBOY: Are you close to most of your 
band members? 

PARTON: I'm close to all the people in 
my band. I'm not above them just be- 
cause I am the star. They are not sid 
men to me. We are all musicians making 
a living for each other. The way w 
travel, I couldn't work with a bunch of 
loonies, a bunch of squirrels. I don't 
mind drugs, I don't mind drinkin' in my 
group as long as it don't interfere with 
my show. We're together 24 hours a day, 
but that one hour onstage is 
That's what I pay for. I don't care what 
you do after the show, I don't care what 
you do until four or five hours before 
the show. As long as everybody is 
straight, so if I want communication 
when we're onstage, I have it 

PLAYBOY: And you feel you're close to 
that now? 

PARTON: Mv group is pretty clean. Sce, 
I live with the band, I travel with ‘em, 
I don't like to separate myself Irom my 
group. In summertime, we take our bar- 


ause of success, 


that was the first 


what I had in 


min 


becue grill and travel by bus. We only 
fly when we have to. 
ping at a truck stop or a restaurant, we 
get a volleyball net out, we stop along 
the side of the road and have а picnic. I 
cook, there's another girl in my group. 
we have a real good time. We have water 
fights, cake fights, food fights . . — like 
brats. Its like family. When the day 
comes when I can't enjoy it or there's 
no fun doin’ it 


Rather than stop- 


there's lots of things 
that I can find joy in, and I would 
PLAYBOY: You once toured with members 
of your own family. What happened to 
your Travelin’ Family Band? 

PARTON: There was a lot of hurt caused 
by some press. They made it sound like 
Thad fired my family. I did not fire my 
family. I had 
cousins in my group and 1 was really 
havin’ to go through things 1 shouldn't 
have—poor 


brothers and sisters and 


ighting, poor sound, poor 
management, poor everything. I just 
decided I was goin’ to quit lor a few 
days, just stop everything and do some 
thinkin’, Because I won't let somethin’ 
run 
I can 
and the 


to а psychiatrist or to а doctor; 
of my ngs. me 
talk it over. 1 
brought up religious and even if Fm not 
a fanatic, 1 have a communication with 
1. which helps me like a psychiatrist 
might help somebody else. 
PLAYBOY: Were either of 
musically talented? 
PARTON: All of my momma's people were 
sing And a lot of 
my daddy's people were really involved 
in music. But it was just around home 
and in church: had ever done 
anything as far as making any money 
with it. I was the that ever 
became popular doin’ it, but there's а 
lot of 'em a lot more talented than me. 
I just had this grit and all these dreams 
and plans. 

PLAYBOY: Do you resemble vour mother? 
PARTON: I look like her and my daddy, 
too. Daddy's people are fair and blond 
and blue-eyed. My momma's people 
have а lot of Indian blood, so they're 


€ Care own tli 


Lord can was 


our parents 
у p 


"s, writers, musicians, 


nobody 


t onc 


dark, with hi; cheekbones and real 
dark hair. I have Momma's features: 
Momma's smile, dimples; but I have 


Daddy's nose. Т got Daddy's pride and 
determination and 1 got Momma's per 
sonality. My momma's people and my 
daddy's people grew up as good friends, 
that’s how they met, so there's a lot of 
marriages between the Partons а 
Owenses. In the mountains, there's. not 
that many people, so most. people are 
related on one side or the other, and 
then they marry in, which makes vou all 
kinfolks. I first. 

first second cousins, stuff like that. 
PLAYBOY: What is a double first cousir 
PARTON: Let me see if I can explain it. 
My mother's mother's sister married my 
daddy's brother. So their kids are my 
first—second?—cousins. It likc 


I'm my own grandpa, don't it? Anyway, 


ad the 


have double cousins, 


sounds 


you can figure it out later, However it 
is, we got some double first cousins and 
first second cousins. That kind of thing. 
Who can tell about mountain people? 
PLAYBOY: Did you go to school with all 
your relatives? 

PARTON: We lived in the mountains and 
there were very few people lived where 
we did, way back in the holler; our 
closest neighbors were a long ways off. 
We walked a long way to school, a one- 
woman school that had the first through 
the cighth grade. Only like 10 or 15 
people in the whole school and one 
teacher. The grades were in rows: There 
might be two kids in the first grade, 
three in the second, one in the third . . . 
and so the teacher would just take a 
chair and sit in the aisle and the other 
kids had to study. I was the first one in 
our family that went to high school. My 
daddy didn't particularly want me to go 
to school, my momma didn't care. In 
the mountains, schoolin’ is not that 
important. 

PLAYBOY: How did you know it was 
important? 

PARTON: I wanted to finish high school 
just so I could say I did, because I knew 
I'd learn things there that I would prob- 
ably need to know, because 1 had al- 
ready decided I was going out into the 
world, 1 was the most popular girl in 
school but in the wrong way. I wore 
tight clothes and told dirty jokes. 

I never failed a subject, but I was 
never a good student. I never studied, 
I just used my own common sense to get 
by. I wanted to take band so I could 
bring my grades up. I didn't want to 
play horn or anything 1 had to really 
learn, so I asked if I could play the 
drums. 1 never did learn to read a note 
of music. I got like 98 in band, which 
brought up my other grades at the end 
of the semester. But I didn't play well. 
1 didn't know what I was dı 
PLAYBOY: Did you like school? 
PARTON: I hated it. Even to this day, 
when I see a school bus, it's just Че 
pressing to me. I think, Those poor little 
kids having to sit there in the summer 
days, staring out the window. It’s hot 
and sweaty in the schoolroom. It re- 
minds me of every feelin’ and every 
emotion that I had in school. I'd hate to 
have to make my own kids go to school. 
I know that sounds terrible. A lot of 
people will say, "What a dumb person." 
І hated school every day I went, but it 
was better than stayin’ home every day. 
Momma was sick a lot; we had some 
real hard times. 

PLAYBOY: What were those hard times 
like? 

PARTON: Momma had kids all the time— 
she had one on her and one in her. She 
was always pregnant, and the time she 
wasn't pregnant, she was just really run- 
down sick, and back then, you didn't 
have doctors that much. Momma took 
spinal meningitis once. The doctor said 


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there was no way she could live, only 
one person in a thousand did live, and 
if she did live, she'd be crippled up. 
He told Daddy and my grandma she 
wouldn't live through the night. So they 
had church that night and they prayed 
all night. They packed Momma in ice, 
her fever was way past where it would 
do brain damage, and the next mornin', 
when the doctor came in, Momma was 
sittin’ up in bed, kickin’ her foot— 
Momma always kicked her foot, like I do, 
it's a rhythm thing. The doctor came in 
and she said, “I've been healed.” And 
he said, “You sure have been healed, 
there's been a miracle happened here.” 
They never could explain it. The only 
thing it did to Momma, it left her deaf 
in one ear, which just made her talk 
louder. 

PLAYBOY: How old were you at that time? 
PARTON: Eleven, twelve. 

PLAYBOY: Were there other illnesses at 
home? 

PARTON: One time, Momma had a mis- 
carriage. It vas really scary. We were all 
little. She started having this miscar- 
riage . . . and she would always read 
the Bible; she'd be in bed and sing 
sacred songs—that was real depressing. 
We always knew when Momma was bad 
sick, she would do that. It was during 
school, my first year. The way we got to 
school was we walked to this green barn. 
The man who owned that property had 
some bulls and they were mean. We had 
to walk along the fence row to get to 
school, and if the bulls would start out 
for us, we'd just roll under the fence. 
Anyway, Momma was at home with the 
two younger kids, they were just, like, 
two and three years old. Momma knew 
she was gonna die if somebody didn't do 
somethin' for her. So she told my little 
brother and sister what they had to do: 
"Now, you get your stick and go to the 
schoolhouse and get the kids, because 
Momma's sick. You take the stick and 
walk along the fence and if the bulls 
start after you, just roll under the fence 
or just hit "em with the stick." Here was 
these little kids, it was really sad. It was 
a long way, even for us. And these two 
little kids must have took forever. We 
were in the middle of class and these two 
little kids . . . it was just so sad, there's 
a lot of things that almost make you cry. 
My little brother stuttered a lot and 
he couldn't talk good. The other kid 
couldn't even talk at all yet. But my 
older sister, Willadene, knew what was 
up when she saw them there. She jumped 
up and grabbed the rest of us and said, 
"Lets go, Momma's sick.” So we just 
all ran home. My two older brothers had 
to run and find somebody to help us. At 
the time, we had some neighbors that 
didn't like us. We'd had a feud—it was 
kinda like the Hatfields and the McCoys. 
But they were good that time; it was 
just God's will, 1 guess. 

PLAYBOY: What was the feud about? 


PARTON: "These people that lived near 
us, they had big kids and they were just 
mean. In the country, you're just born 
mean. They would whip us every day as 
we walked to school, hit us with rocks. 
Daddy made us another path through 
the woods where we could go to school 
and avoid 'em. They got to where they 
would meet us on the trail and still beat 
us up. Well, Daddy just got tired of it. 
He just went to the people and told 
them, "I'm gonna kill somebody if your 
kids don't stop beatin' my kids up." It 
started from that and then it got all the 
older people involved. My daddy and 
brothers got in a fight with these people 
and Daddy whupped about five grown 
people in that one family. So it was a 
real bad thing, we couldn't go by their 
house—they had dogs and theyd let 
them loosc on us if we had to walk that 
way. But when Momma was near dyin', 
we just had nowhere else to go, which 
goes to show you there is good in every- 
body. These two women came and they 
ran out to the main road, which was a 
long, long way, and they had to track 


“I hated school. Even to 
this day, when I see a school 
bus, it's just depressing 
to me. I think, Those poor 
little kids." 


Daddy down. Daddy was workin' at a 
sawmill somewhere. 

PLAYBOY: And then what happened? 
PARTON: There was only two funeral 
homes in Sevierville, which was the near- 
est town to us. The funeral home that 
we didn't even belong to, they come to 
get Momma. It was just a bloody mess. 
We didn't have sheets on our beds; 
Momma would always just sew up rags. 
I remember seeing these people coming 
in these white jackets and this stretcher 
with these snow-white sheets, and you 
could see it a mile away. We just ran 
behind the house, cryin’ and prayin' 
that Momma wouldn't die. 

PLAYBOY: Did you understand death 
then? 

PARTON: We understood that it was final. 
When Momma had spinal meningitis, 
she was pregnant and all the effects went 
to the baby she was carrying. When it 
was born, it only lived nine hours. It 
was the first time I'd ever seen my daddy 


e always looked forward to the ba- 
bies born. A lot of people thought we 
were crazy. Even our relatives. I remem- 
ber when my little brother died, 1 heard 
somebody say at the funeral home, and it 
stuck with me forever, "It's a blessing 
the little thing died." As if we didn't 


need any more kids. I thought, What a 
cruel thing to say, because we waited 
for each baby. It was like a joy. And 
there were so many of us Momma would 
say, "Now, this one's gonna bc yours." 
And we kinda took care of it; it was like 
a new baby doll. With Momma being 
at the hospital and Daddy having to be 
with her a lot, ve were by ourselves and 
was just a real hard, depressed time. 
PLAYBOY: What kind of man is your 
father? 

PARTON: Daddy never had an education, 
but he is the smartest man I ever knew. 
There was never a time when Daddy 
didn't know what to do. My daddy used 
to make moonshine when he and Mom- 
ma were first married. He got out ol 
because Momma didn't like it, but that’s 
just the way of life in the country. That's 
revenue money. If somebody's gonna 
drink it, somebody's got to sell it. 
PLAYBOY: Did you ever drink it? 

PARTON: No, I never did drink moon- 
shine. I tasted it. It tasted terrible. It's 
not a really good drink. I mean, you'd 
have to want it real bad to drink that 
stuff. 

PLAYBOY: Did your parents discipline 
you a lot? 

PARTON: Momma was so lenient, she just 
practically grew up with us. He was 
strict, he kept us in line. If he was mad, 
he whipped us with his belt. He didn't 
beat us, but hed whip us hard. We'd 
have to go get a switch and they were 
pretty good-sized ones. I don't remember 
ever getting whupped with a board; I 
remember getting whupped with a stick 
of stove wood once. 

PLAYBOY: Did you have a lot of child- 
hood fantasies? 

PARTON: We didn't have television and 
we didn't have radio. We didn't have 
electricity. Every now and then, if we 
could afford a battery—we had a battery 
radio—we'd listen to The Grand Ole 
Opry and The Lone Ranger maybe once 
or twice a week. 

But we'd see catalogs—the wishbook, 
Momma called it. Made you wish you 
had things you didn't have. I wanted 
fancy clothes, I wanted jewelry, І want- 
ed to be pretty. 

We related to the Bible a lot, lots of 
stories we played out were from the 
Bible. We were Disciples and we would 
paint on our feet these sandals, and then 
we found these staffs and we just roamed 
those hills as shepherds. We played out 
Jacob and Joseph and the coat of many 
colors. I wrote a song once . . . my favor- 
ite story was the coat of many colors. 

So that was kind of a fantasy we lived 
in. We didn't have books to read, except 
at school, and we tried not to read those. 
PLAYBOY: Did you see magazines or news- 
papers at all? 

PARTON: We'd hear about war stories 
and about famous people, movie stars. 
Sometimes my aunt in Knoxville would 
bring newspapers up, which we used for 


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toilet paper. But before we used it, we'd 
look at the pictures. And we'd hear about 
people who would get rich and you'd 
have all the food you wanted to eat and 
fancy clothes and houses. In our minds, 
there was so many of us, anybody that 
had a clean house was rich. 

PLAYBOY: When did you first use a flush 
toilet? 

PARTON: My aunt in Knoxville had a 
toilet in the bathroom and we were so 
fascinated. We were afraid to use it. I 
just thought it was goin’ to suck us right 
down. She also had the first television 
we ever saw. 

PLAYBOY: What about bathing? 

PARTON: Funny, I was just thinkin’ how 
nobody has ever asked me about how we 
bathed or how ме... you know, be- 
cause we didn't have. 
PLAYBOY: Toilets and facilities? 

PARTON: Yes. We made our own soap 
and in the summertime, we'd go to the 
river. That was like a big bath. And we'd 
all go in swimming and we'd wash our 
hair, wash each other's hair. Soap was 
just flowin’ down the river and we were 
so dirty we left a ring around the Little 
Pigeon River. 

PLAYBOY: What did you do in the winter? 
PARTON: In the wintertime, we just had 
a pan of water and we'd wash down as 
far as possible, and we'd wash up as far 
as possible. Then, when somebody'd 
clear the room, we'd wash possible. 
PLAYBOY: How often did you bathe in 
the winter? 

PARTON: I had to take a bath every night 
t0 be clean, 'cause the kids peed on me 
every night and we all slept three or four 
in a bed. As soon as I'd go to bed, the 
kids would wet on me. That was the only 
warm thing we knew in the wintertime. 
That was our most pleasure—to get peed 
on. If you could just not fan the cover. 
If you kept the air out from under the 
cover, the pee didn’t get so cold. When 
you started fanning that cover, then it 
got bad, cold. Lord, it was as cold in 
the room where we slept as it was out- 
side. We'd bundle up to go to bed. 
PLAYBOY: When you bathed in the river, 
was it in the nude? 

PARTON: We were real modest as kids. 
The boys would go swimmin' naked and 
the girls, sometimes we would, but we 
didn't go naked swimmin' together. As 
soon as you started sproutin' at all, you 
put on a shirt and you didn't take it off. 
I never did see Momma and Daddy 
naked. I'm glad I didn't. 

PLAYBOY: Did your parents teach you the 
fact of life or did you learn them in 
school? 

PARTON: It's somethin’ I learned in the 
barn. [Laughs] 1 probably shouldn't say 
this, but it's just the truth: We were al- 
ways just findin out things on our own. 
We had uncles and cousins that were 
maybe two or three years older than us 
that knew a lot of stuff. When they 


would come to visit us, they'd teach us 
all kinds of meanness or tell us about 
this or that. And soon as we got a chance, 
we'd try it. 

PLAYBOY: Are we talking about sexual 
things? 

PARTON: Now, what were you talkin" 
about? 

PLAYBOY: Just making sure. 

PARTON: We were real curious. A lot of 
people won't admit it, but I just always 
had an open mind about sex. We all did. 
It was not a vulgar thing. We didn't 
know what we were doin', we just knew 
we weren't supposed to let Momma and 
Daddy know it. You never imagine your 
parents ever- 
PLAYBOY: With 12 kids, they obviously 
did. 

PARTON: Yeah. A lot of people say, 
"Well, how in the world could you live 
in a house with 12 kids and never hear 
things?” I don't know how they did it 
or where, but we never did know nothin’ 
about it. But they must have done it. 
PLAYBOY; So your mother never ex- 
plained where all you kids came from? 
PARTON: Momma always told us early 
that God was responsible for people 
havin' babies. I don't even know how I 
learned it. I learned real early. I think І 
probably knew it before Momma did. 
[Laughs] She learned when she was 
about 15 and I don't think she knew 
what was goin' on until she done had 
four kids. I was just so open-minded that 
I found out. If somebody wouldn't tell 
me, I'd ask the first person I thought 
I could ask. 

PLAYBOY: What were the kinds of things 
you were asking? Where it comes from? 
Does it feel good? Does it hurt? 

PARTON: Yeah. We just never did have 
a bunch of hang-ups. Momma never said, 
"Oh, don't do this, you'll go to hell. 
She didn't say do it, either. She didn't 
say. Daddy would have probably blis- 
tered our rear ends if he'd caught us 
foolin’ around. We would just play doc- 
tor and nurse, just explore and experi- 
ment. 

PLAYBOY: What about those guys who 
used to beat you all up—your neigh- 
bors—did they ever sexually abuse any 
of you? 

PARTON: No. That's why they beat us 
up—because we wouldn't do anything. 
[Laughs] We didn't want to do it with 
them. I mean, we were choosy! But we 
never got sexually jumped or anything 
by them. 

PLAYBOY: What was your first sexual ex- 
perience like? 

PARTON: I always loved sex. I never had 
a bad experience with it. I was just very 
emotional. I felt that I could show my 
emotion just like I show my emotion 
with words. If I felt I wanted to share 
an emotion, then I did. To me, sex was 
not dirty. It was somethin’ very intimate 
and very real. І don't ever remember 


НАМЕ. Inc. 


° 


101 


PLAYBOY 


102 


bein’ afraid of it. I wasn't afraid the first 
time I tried it. 

PLAYBOY: How old were you the first 
time? 

PARTON: Now, I can't tell you that, be- 
cause that would probably be real per- 
verted. As little kids, we were always 
experimenting. 

PLAYBOY: Well, you seem to have had a 
healthy childhood. Did you share your 
dreams of being a star with your parents? 
PARTON: Yeah. I started writing songs 
before J went to school. Momma always 
wrote down stuff that I'd make up. I just 
had a gift of writing. I'd hear my people 
talk about relatives’ bein’ killed and I 
would make up all these heartbreakin’ 
songs about it. They'd forget they'd 
talked about it and they couldn't imagine 
where I would come up with all these 
ideas. I just knew how to put it into 
story form. And Momma would write 
them down. 

PLAYBOY: When did you start singing on 
the radio? 

PARTON: I had an uncle that told me 
there was this radio show in Knoxville 
and that sometime he might take me 
down there and I might get to be on it. 
I wanted to do that. So, when I was ten 
years old, I sung on the radio. And they 
all liked me real good, so they wanted 
me to work in the summer months. They 
said they'd pay me $20 a week. My aunt 
in Knoxville said she would take me up 


to the radio stations and the TV shows 
if Momme and Daddy would let me stay, 
and she did. I worked there in the sum- 
mers until I was 18. I went from $20 a 
week to S60 when I left. 

PLAYBOY: What kinds of songs were you 
singing? 

PARTON: I sung country music, some songs 
I wrote. І was singing by myself and 
playing the guitar. But I guess it was be- 
cause I was a little kid they were sayin’ 
people liked it. I wasn't that good. 
PLAYBOY: Were any of your songs record- 
ed then? 

PARTON: I made my first record when 1 
was around 11. 

PLAYBOY: And when did you make your 
first appearance at the Opry? 

PARTON: I was just a kid, 12 or 13. My 
uncle told the man at The Grand Ole 
Opry that I wanted to be on. The man 
said, "You can't be on The Grand Ole 
Opry, you are not in the union." And 1 
said, "What is a union?" I didn't know 
if it was a costume or a room to practice 
or what. I kept tellin’ everybody. I said 
ТЇЇ just sing one song. Most of the artists 
at the Opry at that time had two spots. 
Nobody would let me sing and 1 walked 
up to Jimmy C. Newman, who was goin’ 
to sing next, and told him I wanted to 
be on. He told Johnny Cash that I was 
goin’ to sing. And so Johnny Cash 
brought me out and I sung and I just 
tore the house down. I had to sing it 


over and over and over. 1 thought 1 was 
a star. That was my first time. 

PLAYBOY: How did vou fec 
PARTON: I was kind of scared, but I was 
excited, Daddy and 
Momma were listenin’ on the radio. 1 
didn't grasp all what it meant, but I 
knew I had to be on The Grand Ole 
Opry, that is all there was. 
PLAYBOY: Were you always encouraged to 
be whatever you wanted to be? 

PARTON: Where I came from, people never 
dreamed of venturing out. They just 
lived and died there, Grew up with fami- 
lies and a few of them went to Detroit 
and Ohio to work in the graveyards and 
the car factories, But I'm talkin’ about 
venturing out into areas that we didn't 
understand, To me, a litle kid coming 
from where 1 did and having that ambi 
tion and savin' I wanted to be a star, 
people would say "Well, it’s good to 
daydream, but don't get carried away." 
People would say you can't do this or 
you can't become this. Well, if you don't 
think you will do it, nobody else will 
think it. 

Ive got more confidence than I do 
talent, I think. I think confidence is the 
of success, I really do. 
Just belicvin' you can do it. You can 
e it to the point where it can be 
come reality. When I made my change 
to do what I'm doin’ now to appeal to 
a broader audience, people said, 


because I knew 


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can't do that, because you are goin’ to 
wreck your whole career; you are goin’ 
to lose your country fans and you're not 
goin’ to win the others, and then you're 
goin’ to have noth You just better 
think about that, "Та didn't mat- 
ter to me, because I knew I had to do 
itand I knew I could do it. 

PLAYBOY: What other kinds of things 
could you do as an entertainer? 
PARTON: I don't think there's a 
I can't do. Under the right с 
could just about do anything. Even à 
Broadway pla i 
al where I didn't have to be a 
nd-type singer or have a beat 
ined voice. If it was so 


t have that kind of con- 
fidence in themselves. 

PLAYBOY: Have you scen many Broadway 
plays? 

PARTON: I've never seen a Broadway 
play . . . I've never been to an opera . . . 
T've never seen a live stage performance. 
1 guess I' 
PLAYBOY: But you have been to the mov- 
ies and you may be doing three films. 
PARTON: I never wanted to be in the 
movies. I have never done any acting at 
all, never thought Td be particularly 
good at it. But the people at 20th 
Century-Fox really feel like I can be, or 
that I am, а natural actress. When they 
approached me, all I said was, “I don’t 


not very classy. 


know if 1 can or can't, but if you think 
Т can and you want to take th: 
ru € it with you." It's as 
that. Can you imagine me bein 
tress? But а lot of people are interested. 
dy Gallin, my manager, is making a 
hellacious deal, but no one knows if I 
can do it at all. 

re you planning on 
ing lessons? 

PARTON: No. They're just goin' to find a 
script where I can play my true personal- 
ity, rather than tryin' to play like some 
girl from Australia. It’s goin’ to have 
to be Dolly Parton without bein’ Dolly 
Parton. I'm goin’ to write my own story, 
but it's not time yet. "There's so much to 
my life that I can write a series of things, 
if I want. I can take a subject and make 
a full-length movie, if 1 want to do th 
PLAYBOY: Have you any properties 
mind? 

PARTON: No. I've been asked to do the 
Mae West story. 1 don't know that much 
about Mae West. A lot of people have 
often compared me to her . . . not our 
looks or not just the way we seem to be 
built or anything, but our attitudes, you 
know. We were both creative and we 
knew what we wanted and we pretty 
much rolled into the things we did. And 
they say she pretty much wrote every- 
thing she'd done. I've never seen her. 
Also, somebody felt I should do the 
Marilyn Monroe story. I don't think I 


ng 


n 


want to play somebody else, I think I'm 
a character mysell—for mc to try to play 
somebody else's character woukl not be 
as wise as for me to create one of my 
own. 
PLAYBOY: Do you have any directors you 
might go to? 
PARTON: To be honest, I never thought 
about bein' in the movies enough to get 
that far along with that. I'm not really 
volved in who does what. I don’t 
know who the directors or pro- 
ducers are, They say that if you've got 
the right director, that anybody can act. 
It’s all kind of new, this movie thing. 
I've met a few people, but I can't remem- 
ber their names. 
PLAYBOY: How about screenwriters, say 
someone like Ncil Simon? 
PARTON: "That is who I wish would write 
somethin’ for me. I saw The Goodbye 
Girl and that’s the type of thing that 
I see myself in. It's got depth, it’s a 
comedy, it's got love . . . it just reminded 
me of the way I would react under the 
same conditions. You know, crazy and 
stupid, tryin’ to make the best out of a 
situation. I'm even goin’ to call my 
i ably farfetched. . . . 
Neil Simon may not even have an inter- 
cst in me, period. But 1 can see myself 
doin’ the type of things he writes. 
PLAYBOY: What about Woody Allen? 
PARTON: I love Woody Allen. I think he's 
sexy. He is so cute that he is sexy. I 


103 


go with the depth and that turns me on 
sexually. 

PLAYBOY: Would you 
Woody Allen movie? 
PARTON: Yes, if he'd be in it with me. 
T loved Annie Hall and I loved The 
Goodbye Girl, and Гог the same reasons, 
because they were both very realistic— 
funny, serious, even the bad times were 


ike to be in a 


PLAYBOY 


good. Maybe we'll team Woody and Neil 
up and they cm do somethin’ really 
great, 

PLAYBOY: Do you have any favorite 
movies? 


PARTON: My favorite movie of all times 
is Doctor Zhivago. I've always liked mov- 
ics with lots of production in them, espe- 
cially things that were true, like The Ten 
Commandments. 

PLAYBOY: Have you ever seen a porno 
mov 

PARTON: Yes, I have. Once, this secretary 
that worked in one of our offices, her 
husband had nt of a real awful one. 


Td never seen anything up until that 
time, I always wanted to, but | didn't 
want anybody to know I was doin’ it. 
She brought it to work and she brought 
the projector. When everybody left for 
lunch, she said, "Why don't we all 
watch?” Because none of us had ever 
seen one. We got to watchin’ that thing 
nd we got so embarrassed with cach 


other. Tt, of course, moved you, but it 
was real embarrassing. And it got real 
gross, too. 

Another time, I saw опе in a pul 
place. My girlfriend and me went to 
New York. This was a long time ago, E 
was about 21, and I wasn't that recog- 
nized. We had always wanted to see a 
real one. We thought it would be somc- 
thin’ dirty enough to enjoy. We tried to 
sneak in when nobody would sce. There 
somethin’ real shameful about goin’ 
thei 
so we went. 
that theater, 
PLAYBOY: Where wits it 
PARTON: I don't know; it was down in 
one of them slum areas. We just got а 
cab, it was a Friday night, and this terri- 


but we dared each other to do it, 
It had an awful smell in 


in there. It was mostly men, a couple of 
women alone, no couples. Me and my 
girlfriend was sittin’ in the back, so we 
were goin’ to make a quick exit if we 
needed to, and then this movie came on. 
It looked OK for a few minutes, and all 
of a sudden, it got into the most gross 
things, | didn't know how to react and 
she didn't, either. We were emi sed 
in front of each other, we didn't know 
whether to look or not. We were so curi- 
ous we couldn't keep from lookin’. I 
didn't know how to react with her. If I 
had Carl there or somethin’, we might 
have got down to business. So we ran 
out and we started runnin’, so nobody 
104 would know where we came from, At 


that time, we didn't know that prosti- 
tutes ran in pairs New York City for 
protection. And there is no way in the 
world that you catch a cab on a 
Friday night in New York City. We 
didn't know that. 

All of a sudden, these men started ap- 
proachin' us on the street. They thought 
we were up for sale. You can imagine 
how ridiculous I looked. I would look 
like a streetwalker if you didn't know 
this was image. 1 would look like a 
total whore, I suppose. Im sure we 
looked just like what they thought we 
wi Bur I had û gun. I never traveled 
without a gun, still don't. 1 always carry 
a gun, 

PLAYBOY: What kind? 

PARTON: A .38 pistol I have a permit 
for it in Nashville. I just carry it for 
protection. I feel safer when Гуе got it. 
I just don't like the idea of knowin’ I'm 
totally helpless. I'm always scared in a 
big city and New York was totally foreign 
to us, Anyhow, these men would ap- 
proach us and Td say we're from out 
of town. We didn’t understand why they 
were after us. I said we were waitin’ on a 


a gun. A 38 
pistol. I have a permit for 


“I always car 


it in Nashville... .I just 
don't like the idea of 
knowin’ I’m totally 


helpless." 


cab and weren't interested, but thanks 
for the compliment. [Laughing] 

I was doin’ all the talkin’, be 
girlfriend always knew I'd get u 
any ion, and she started laughin’ 
at me. That made me mad, because I was 
so scared! This one man came at me а 
he was really pullin’ at me, he was try 
to handle me, just maul me, the whole 
works, I told him, “Just get away and 
don't bother me anymore.” He kept 
yin’, "Oh, come on, honey, I know you 
want iL" He was offerin’ us money and 
I said, "Look, I don't know what it i 
we are not interested. we arc not on the 
we are tryin’ to get home, don't 
you understand that?" There I was, with 
my big Southern accent and my big wig. 
He just thought if he bargained long 
enough that ГА give in. He kept pullin” 
at me and I was getting furious and I 
was cussin’ him, and I don't cuss t 
much, I was sayin’, "You son of a bitch, 
you dirty b j 
is not like me at all, but I was terrified, 
and I was mad, too, because I can't stand 
people who pull at me unless I want to 
be pulled at. And my girlfriend was 
шайы the wall, dyin’ laughing. We 


se my 
out of 


nd 


could have both been raped or killed, 
but she was gettin’ such a kick, because 
she'd never seen this side of me before. 
ious at her and I told her, 


or I'm gonna beat the shit out of you, 
nd I got my gun out of my 


pocketbook. I told the man, “If you put 
your me one more time, 1 
swear to I will shoot you.” And 


I would have. I wouldn't have shot him 
in the stomach or nothin’, I would have 
shot his feet off or shot at the ground. 
My girlfriend was just hollerin’, laugh- 
in’ and, boy, I told her when we got rid. 
n, “If you ever do that to me а 
swear to you I may not whup your ass, 
but ТЇЇ be caught dead ауіп" [Laugh- 
ing] She never did quit laughin’, she just 
thought that was the funniest thing she'd 
ever seen, We headed out to a porno 
movie and it wound up bein’ a comedy. 
PLAYBOY: Was that your first time in New 
York? 
PARTON: It was, and for years T thought 
I hated New York City for that very г 
son. Since then, it has become one of my 
very favorite cities: I go back all the time, 
there's great people there. It's just that 
then 1 didn't understand them and they 
sure didn't understand me. 
PLAYBOY: Now t u've had your 
about New York, lers try Los Angeles. 
You've been spending a lot of time out 
there lately. Do you like it there? 
PARTON: It's beautiful and it’s exciting. E 
reilly enjoy it for a week. After that, 
I go L.A. crazy. I just got to get out of 
there, it's so crazy and wild, especially 
the places I have to be and the people 
I have to be around when I'm out there; 
most of them are so spaced out or just 
involved in all sorts of weird things, even 
the people you work with, especially 
show people. I just have to get away from 
them. I get homesick. The country in me 
says, “WI in the world are you doin” 
walkin’ on concrete when you could be 
rollin’ in the grass? 
PLAYBOY: Let's get to the country in you. 
Do you get insulted when people put 
down country music? 
PARTON: Terribly insulted. Saying some 
thin’ about country music is like sa. 
somethin’ about a brother or 
my momma and daddy. Bec 
made me a livin’, it is someth I love 
and appreciate. I know what it stands 
for, I know what it is. It is a music to 
be respected. 
PLAYBOY: What is it about country music 
that attracts people? 
PARTON: It’s the simplicity of it. it is 
everyday stories about everyday people. 
It deals with human emotions, human 
relationships: it is love and heartbreak 
and fun things and honky-tonk . . . the 
way that the truck drivers and the aver- 
age middle-class American lives. 

‘Then, too, country music through tele- 
vision and radio started getting broader. 
When country started gettin’ on TV, 


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PLAYBOY 


people realized that we are not just hill- 
billies and hicks, toe jam and bare feet— 
we only go barefooted ‘cause we want to, 
not ‘cause we can't do no better. To me, 
it’s the greatest music because it does 
deal with life, with people, and it deals 
with simple sounds. If it is done right, 
it is the best music there is. 

PLAYBOY: What would you say is the dif- 
ference between country singing and pop 
or rock singing? 
PARTON: There i: 


in quality, а cer- 
tain pu es. They 
sound plainer, countrier, more blunt. 
They don't do a lot of screams and 
squalls. 

PLAYBOY: Are you more prolific as a song- 
writer than most? 
PARTON: Ys. It's 


just a natural gift. I 
like to write and I write all the time. 
Туе written less in the last year and a 
half, but even at that, I've written more 
than most writers do. It's just so easy. 
I've got hundreds and hundreds of songs, 
thousands, actually, I've had а few hun- 
dred published and recorded. The good 
thing about it is this: I've been writin’ 
all these years, if I never wrote another 
song, I've got it made. People are goin’ 
back now and gettin’ songs of mine and 
recordin’ them, things I did on albums 
years ago. Of course, I still will write. 
Its like most people will sit down and 
smoke a pipe, I just sit down and pick 
up a piece of paper... . 

PLAYBOY: Do you write in longhand? 
PARTON: Yeah, I scribble; nobody can 
read it but me, hardly. I write on torn 
paper, Kleenex boxes, napkins. I wrote 
Coat of Many Colors on the bus. It's my 
most famous song. I was with Porter and 
he had some clothes cleaned and I took 
the tickets off of his cleanin' bags and 
wrote the song on them. After the song 
became a hit, he had the tickets framed. 
PLAYBOY: What's the biggest song that 
you've had recorded? 

PARTON: Jolene was the biggest hit I've 
had. Jt was also recorded by Olivia 
Newton-John. I also had a song called 
I Will Always Love You, which Linda 
Ronstadt recorded. I've had tons of 
songs and albums recorded by other 
people. But I've yet to have that bi, 
smash, 1,000,000-selling song of my own. 
I've had lots of number-one songs, but 
when you get involved in how much 
they sell, re to get a 1,000,000 seller. 
PLAYBOY: Is most of what you write auto- 
biographical? 

PARTON: Everything I write is not about 
me. You have to be able to te to the 
things you write about, but you don’t 
have to live them personally. 

PLAYBOY: One of your songs, Bargain 
Store, in which you compare your body 
to used merchandise, was banned by 
some radio stations. Were you surprised? 
PARTON: I was in total shock, 'cause I 
never meant nothin’ dirty in that song. 
In It’s All Wrong, but 105 All Right, Y 


106 really did. 1 meant for it to be what it 


was. You know, what people call makin’ 
love to somebody you're not married to. 
With lyrics like, "Hello, are you free 
tonight?/I like your looks, I love your 
smile; /could I use you for a while?" Just 
how plain can I be? But I thought the 
times would laugh at that. But there was 
some question about it. Even in this day 
and time, when you can say everything, 
country music is a little bit more delicate 
and I respect that. 

PLAYBOY: What do you feel when you're 
performing your songs onstage? 

PARTON: ] just get real excited onstage, 
because I love to sing and perform, It 
takes me about three hours to come 
down. Your openin' tune is usually the 
one you get off on if you're goin’ to get 
off. Sometimes I get so excited over a 
certain moment onstage, | could just 
swear that it’s the same thing as sex. . . . 
Music is the closest thing to it to me. 
PLAYBOY: Do you have any ideas about 
how you might change the kinds of shows 
you perform now? 

PARION: J would want to be more bi- 
zarre as time goes om. I would like to 
have a screen behind me onstage when 1 


“Saying somethin’ about 
country music is like saying 
somethin’ about a brother or 
sister or my momma an d 
daddy... . It isa music 
to be respected.” 


do the songs and tell the stories of the 


I'm havin' some people even now be- 
gin to film things from the mountains, 
like the tobaccaspittin' contest, the 
greased-hog contest and the horse-turd- 
throwin’ contest that they have in Ken- 
tucky every year. That's a real occasion, 
the Annual Kentucky Horse Turd 
Throwin' Contest. Can you imagine get- 
tin’ crowned Horse Turd Queen of the 
day? They probably make a crown out of 
horse turds. I'm not tryin’ to be dirty, I 
swear that's what they call it. An audi- 
ence would love to scc that, because 
they've never seen it. I'd like to | 
that onstage, narrate the happenings, 
then have the music. I just have a lot of 
cı wild ideas and some of these days 
Im gonna get them all together and 
hope somebody don’t steal them. And if 
you do, you're a sorry son of a bitch! 
PLAYBOY: Where do you see your career 
at the moment? 

PARTON: Most people say in this business 
the life span of a career is five years 
from the time you really get hot to the 
time you start getting colder, like an El- 
ton John, Maybe I shouldn't call names. 


‘That's just what I heard, that you don't 
expect to really be the hottest except for 
maybe five years, and with a ‘TV show, 
t's usually a three-to-five-year thing, and 
then you cool off, people have seen what 
you do. I think maybe I am right now 
starting in my first year of from one to 
five. That's what I'd like to th: 
PLAYBOY: Since we're on the subject of 
names, let's get your opinion of some of 
your contemporaries. We'll start with the 
an you thi the true queen of 
country music, Kitty Wells. 

PARTON: She was the first extremely pop- 
ular female country singer. She was like 
a pioncer for all the rest of us. She sold 
all kinds of records to soldiers апа juke- 
boxes and honky-tonks. She is such a 
natural, pure and authentic singer. She 
sings from the heart and she don’t worry 
about what the noise is goin’ to sound 
like. 

PLAYBOY: Johnny Cash? 

PARTON: Johnny is dramatic. I don't 
think Johnny is a good singer, but I 
think he is one of those people that is 
so believable that people can relate tc 
He's got a way of delive you just 
know that it had to happen if Johnny 
said so. 

PLAYBOY: Loretta Lynn? 

PARTON: Sings with a lot of human emo- 
tion and country emotion, a lot of purity 
and honesty in her voice. Similar to 
Cash's—not the greatest voice 
ve ever heard, but it’s believable. 
PLAYBOY: Her 
PARTON: A beautiful voice. Crystal clear, 
if you'll pardon the expression. 

PLAYBOY: Tanya Tucker? 

PARTON: If she cver gets with the right 
producer and the right label and gets 
the right manager, 1 think she can really 
be great, especially as a rock-n-roll sing- 
er. Her voice is so powerful, like a Janis 
Joplin or a Linda Ronstadt. . . | She 
Could really be a huge artist, because she 
is great on the stage. 


PLAYBOY: Janis Joplin? 
Her voice was like mine, you 
ed it or you . 1 never par- 


ed for it. It was different. 
e what she left behind 


ticularly 
But I do appre 
in the world of music. 


PLAYBOY: Linda Ronstadt? 
PARTON: She is one of the greatest female 
voices I ever hi 


PLAYBOY: What's happening with the al- 
bum the three of you are doing? The 
release date keeps being postponed. Is it 
finished? 

PARTON: We've done several tracks, but 
we haven't decided whether or not to do 
more acoustic things or do some rock 
things. Any time you get three people, 
with three different labels and three dif- 
ferent managers, there's always compli- 
ns. But it's somethin’ we've always 
писа to do. We have talked about it 


here's a mu- 
tion among the 


for years. We are friend: 
tual respect and admi 
three of us, IL it was a matter of business, 
it would have been a rush release. We 
want it to be free and happy, a labor of 
love. There is а possibility it will never 
reach the market. I personally feel it 
would be a shame and a waste of talent 
if business and personal problems pre- 
vented it from being released. 

PLAYBOY: How did you get to know Linda 
and Emmylou? 
PARTON: Through my music. They were 
fans of mine. I had heard that they want- 
ed ао meet me, and so we made it a 
point to do that, and then we became 
friends. I met Emmy first, when she 
came to Nashville. She һай recorded 
Coat of Many Colors. When I came back 
to L.A., she invited me to her house. 
Linda was invited over to supper that 
night and that’s how we met. 

PLAYBOY: Did you ever mect Elvis? 
PARTON: No, I never did. But I always 
felt that we were kin. I feel like I know 
exactly how he was. Every time he'd 
come in town. even if I was home, 1 just 
wouldn't go, somethin’ always kept me 
from goin’. There were other people I 
liked to hear sing better, but there was 
nobody that I ever related to more, 
PLAYBOY: What was it about liim you re- 
lated to? 

PARTON: He was very loving. very emo- 
tional, very sensitive, very giving, very 
humble, thankful, grateful. I always felt 
that he was totally in awe of his own 
success and he didn't quite understand 
why he had been so chosen and why he 
was such an idol. How he felt about God 
and religion was always somethin' I re- 
lated to а lot, because 1 know he was 
brought up with his mother in the 
Assembly of God. It was a real free- 
spirited, shoutin’ church. 1 watched and 
heard how he reacted to Gospel. music 
and how he loved that the best of all and 
how he almost seemed to feel he 
callin’ to do somethin’ different and may- 
be more spiritual than what he actually 
was doin’, but you know, he never got 
a chance to try. He touched people's 
lives а lot of ways. He was the sex 
symbol of the world and when he started 
gainin’ weight and gettin’ fat, he lost a 
lot of his glamor to а lot of people. I 
always thought his manager was brilliant, 
as well. They built that mystery up about 
him. When he started losin’ his glamor 
and doin’ those concerts, he became more 
ordinary. That's when they started pub- 
lishing all the things about him. Then 
people realized that he was not a god of 
any sort, but he was just an extraordi- 
nary human bein’. 1 think if he hadn't 
died when he did, within the next five 
years he wouldn't have been a hero at 
all, because he was talked about too 
much . . . seen too much. That's how 
cruel the public can be. 

PLAYBOY: Do you think that there will 
be another Elvis, or someone of his 


Why now, 
more than ever 


we can ask, 
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107 


stature, to come along? 
PARTON: I don't think it will be soon, I 
don't think it will be anythin' you and 
me will ever see. 

PLAYBOY: What about a female Elvis? 
PARTON: That is possible. I think there 
is due a person, a female, which there 
has never been. A person of that type, 
with that great magnetism and that great 
mysterious thing, that great love, that 
charisma and magic to draw people to 
her, that can help people in many ways 
just through her music. Yes, I think that 
а female is due, I do. And your nes 
question: Do I think it is me? 

PLAYBOY: You're the one smiling, 
PARTON: Well, let me say, I would never 
be an Elvis, and I would never want to 
be Elvis. But I would like to be a person 
truly loved enough to be able to have 
that much of an impact on people as far 
as bein’ able to guide them or help them 
or let them sce that you're caring. 
PLAYBOY: Your mother has said that she 
always expected you to lead people to 
the Lord. Do you think that someday 
that might happen—besides just singi 


PLAYBOY 


le. My mother and many pcople 
have always said that they saw the love 
of God in me. I expect that someday, in 
some way, before I die, ГЇЇ have done 
some good for God. who I think has done 
all the good in me thats ever been 
done. I think that people for years have 
passed God right up, looked right past 
Him, thinkin’ that He was some great 
monster in the sky and that you had to 
live with these horrible guilt feclin's and 
you had to crawl under a bed if you'd 
done somethin’ wrong. 1 have a totally 
different concept of God. I'm God-fear- 
but I'm not afraid of God. The м 
I look at God is, I think He means some- 
thin’ different to everybody. We arc all 
God's children, if we just clear a way for 
Him to work through us. You don't have 
to be standin’ in a church house to reach 
people to change their lives to do good. 
1 don't want to get so involved in this 
that people think, Oh, another country 
music fanatic, because I'm not a fan 
never was. If I need to make a decisi 
or somethin’, I just talk out loud to God. 
I joke with God. He don't ever say 
nothin’ back. 
PLAYBOY: Do you go to church? 
PARTON: No, not anymore. Carl and I 
are probably afraid we'll become total 
ch ns and then well... I don't 
know. I always want to go home when 
they're havin’ a revival, though. Some- 
day, when I have some time off, I 
want to go back to the house and stay 
home for a couple of months, spend the 
summer, work the fields and go to the 
orchards, can apples and peaches—do 
stult like I used to. And if th 
a revival, I'll go. I'll get upand s 
PLAYBOY: You first became па 
108 prominent as part of a tcam with Porter 


Wagoncr. Tell us about your relation- 
ship with him. 

PARTON: Porter has bcen one of the 
greatest and most popular country artists 
of all times. 1 can never take the credit 
away from Porter for givin’ me a big 
break. I learned a lot from him. He 
spired me and 1 inspired him. We were 
good for each other in y ways and 
just a disaster for cach other in a lot of 


"ways. ГЇЇ always love him in my own way. 
PLAYBOY: In what ways did your working 


together become a disaster? 

PARTON: We just got to where we argued. 
nd quarreled about personal things. 
we had no business quarreling 
nd arguing about. It was beginning to 
ly good relationship. We 
long very well, but no more 
mine. We were just a lot 


fault thai 
alike. Both 


PLAYBOY: He has said that for two years 
he devoted 95 percent of his time to you 
and then he didn't hear from you for a 
year. He sounds bitter. 

PARTON: I'm sure he is bitter at this 


— 
"Tm havin’ some people 
begin to film things from 

the mountains, like the 

tobacca-spittin’ contest 
and the horse-turd-throwin’ 

contest that they have in 


Kentucky every year.” 
) 7 


point. He is so strongheaded 
led, he won't accept things 
sometimes the way they are. I won't, 
either, sometimes. We're kind of involved 
in some legal things, I'm tryin’ to buy my 
part of the catalog back, where ГЇЇ have 
all my songs back together. Someday Т 
hope we can be friends. We are not ene- 
mies. We just don't ever see each other. 
PLAYBOY: How much money was Porter 
paying you? 

PARTON: The years I was with Porter, I 
worked for $300 a night, which is 
other reason I needed to get out on my 
own: I needed to make more money. 
PLAYBOY: "That was how much a ycar? 
PARTON: Sixty thousand dollars a year. 
I started from no money at all and that 
sounded like a fol of money to me. And 
it was. But why should 1 work for hun- 
dreds and thousands when I can work for 
hundreds of thousands? 

PLAYBOY: How much a night did you 
make when you worked on your own, 
after leaving Porter? 


PARTON: When I went out on my own, T 
was working for $2500, then it got up to 
$3000, and now I have no idea. It is 
ay up in the thousands. 

PLAYBOY: Is it around 530,000? 

PARTON: I don't know exactly how much 
I make; I would say anywhere from 
515,000 up a night now. I know I got 
530.000 for some shows Гус done re- 
cently. And I was offered $50,000 to do 
a special show, but for some reason, I 
didn't do it. That's the most I've been 
offered at this point, I think. 

PLAYBOY: How many businesses do you 
own? 

PARTON: Quite а few. I own three pub- 
lishing companies. I’m startin’ a produc- 
tion company. I own quite a bit of 
property. I have the Dolly doll, for 
which we own the company. We have 
program books, colorin’ books, souvenir 
things of that type. I have lots of invest- 
ments, lots of tax shelters. Гуе got some 
good smart business people now. I have 
some really wild dreams and plans. I 
love to hear crazy ideas. I'm goin" 
to have a linc of wigs, I think that would 
be a perfect business for me. 

PLAYBOY: We've been m. 
about your wigs. / 
synthetic? 


ning to ask 
те they real hair or 


mthetic. They never lose their 


PLAYBOY: Loretta Lynn has said that 
while most singers aren't particular in 
the dressing room, you always go behind 
а little curtain to dress. She says nobody 
has ever scen you without a wig on. 

PARTON: Lorctta has seen my own hair. 
I think she forgot or just wanted to make 
a bigger thing than it was. Maybe she 
just didn’t recognize it as bein’ my own 
hair. My own hair is blonde. I keep it 
- ЕИ eventually wear my own 
fain, once I become so successful 
that people know you сап become suc- 
cessful by lookin’ and bein’ any way you 
want to if you've got enough ambition 
and talent. A lot of people have ap- 
proached me in a way that sounded like 
I was supposed to dress and undress in 


in front of peopl 
they would want to look, 

curiosity, I gu pcople do 
does not bothe t all. 1 only wish 
that what I do wouldn't bother them. 
PLAYBOY: Let's wind this up by asking 
you some random questions. If you could 
go back in time and be someone else 
for a while, who would you like to be? 
PARTON: That's not а random question, 
thats а great question! Гус never 
thought about that in my life... . I 
think, maybe, Will Rogers. He reminds 
me of my own people and of myself. 
PLAYBOY: What if you could invite any 
five people from history to a dinner 
party—whom would you choose? 
PARTON: Will Rogers would be my main 
guest. Beethoven. Bob Hope. Strother 


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PLAYBOY 


Martin. Festus, from Gunsmoke. 

What would you serve them? 
PARTON: Fricd potatoes and green beans, 
countrystyle creamed corn, corn bread 
and to beans and turnip 
greens, meat loaf, I'd probably make up 
a vanilla pudding. I'd have to fix Bee- 
thoven a chef's salad. I don't think he'd 
want all that grease. 

PLAYBOY: What's your favorite food? 
PARTON: Potatoes. I'm a starch freak. I'm 
а junk-food person, too. I like pizza, po- 
tato chips, Fritos. My main weakness is 
overeating. Now it's beginning to dawn 
on me that I have a weight problem and 
I have to learn to control it some way. I 
am getting approached for so many 
things, for movies, for the PLAYHoY cover. 
So I'm on a dict 


t you once on a liquid- 
which lately has bec 
proved to be dangerous? 

PARTON: I did that and I lost 23 pounds. 
Fat persons don't care if they dic tryin’ 
to get it off. [Laughs] 

PLAYBOY: Are you attracted to thin or 
to muscular men? 

PARTON: Гус always been more attracted 
to real slender men. My husband is 
skinny as a rail, and tall. They say that 
you usually will be attracted to the oppo- 
site of yourself. 

PLAYBOY: Is i 
for you? 
PARTON: It’s not hard, ‘cause all you got 
to do is make up the gaudiest thing you 
can make, Just pile as much мий that 
don't belong on it as you can and I'll 
like it. 

PLAYBOY: How many rooms of clothing 
do you have? 

PARTON: I've got clothes in the closets 
of every room in my house—23 rooms. 
One whole wing of my house is filled 
with costumes and al clothes. 
PLAYBOY: And you sometimes shop at 
ederick's of Hollywood? 

PARTON: I buy my shoes there; it's the 
only place І can find shoes high enough 
and sexy enough to suit me. I buy thou- 
sands of dollars of shoes every year. I 
an't wear their clothes, because I can't 
buy clothes off a rack. 

PLAYBOY: Do you support the Equal 
Rights Amendment? 


hard to design clothes 


PARTON: Equal rights? I love every- 
body... 
PLAYBOY: We mean equal rights for 


women. 
PARTON: I can’t keep up with it. 

PLAYBOY: Do you read any books on the 
women’s movement? 

PARTON: Never have. I know so little 
about it they'd probably be ashamed 
that | was а woman. Everybody should 
be free: И you don't want to stay home, 
get out and do somethin’; if you want to 
stay home, stay home and be 
PLAYBOY: Do you ha: 
authors? 

PARTON: J don't read that much. I prob- 


по ably should be ashamed to say that, I 


read mostly articles and things I'm 
terested in. E always liked Agatha Chri 
tie, but I never did read all that many of 
her things. I like books like The Magic 
of Believing. Positive-thinking books, 
self-improvement books. Long before I 
knew there were books about that stuff, 
that was my philosophy of life. 

PLAYBOY: What about politics? 

PARTON: I hate to say this and people 
probably think I'm real dumb to do it, 
but 1 am so involved in my work and my 
music I don't even know what's goin’ 
on in the world. I don't even know 
who the Vice-President is. Well, I do 
know . . . but as far as gettin’ po 
involved, it's like bein’ denomi 
If you're a Democrat, the Republicans 
hate you; if you're a member of one 
church, then the other ones hate you. 
Every denomination thinks they're the 
only ones gettin’ to heaven and they feel 
sorry for the other denominations. I think 
we can all get there if we work right. 
PLAYBOY: Moving right along . . . has 
sex changed for you over the years? 
PARTON: Sex? Yes, it gets better. The rea- 
son it gets better is because you get more 


"I never met Elvis. I always 
felt that we were kin.I 
feel like I know exactly 

how he was. . .. He touched 

people’s lives ina lot 


of ways.” 
— 


mature, you're more relaxed, you experi- 
ence more things until you become more 
comfortable with them. and then you 
{eel also comfortable to experience new 
things, totally new and different things. 
It takes you a while to trust somebody 
enough to be able to tell your fantasi 
PLAYBOY: How strong are your fantasies? 
PARTON: Pretty strong. But I think all 
creative people and highly emotional 
people have strong fantasies. 

PLAYBOY: What are some of yours? 
PARTON: I'm not tellin’ you all that 
stuf. . . . Get over here and ГЇЇ show 
you. [Laughs] Are you perverted? 
PLAYBOY: Why? Are you sexually aggres- 
sive? 

PARTON: I'm very aggressive. I don't mind 
bein’ the aggressor if it comes to some- 
thin' I need or want 

PLAYBOY: Do you like dangerous sex? 
PARTON: Nothin' better than sex when 
you think you have to sneak it. 

PLAYBOY: Now for the big question: Do 
you sleep in the nude? 

PARTON: It has just been the last couple 


of years that I've really started. sleepin" 
naked. Sometimes I sleep naked with 
Carl and sometimes I don't, If I'm up 


writin’ and I have on a robe, I'll write 
until I fall asleep and crawl into bed. If 
we go to bed together, I usually go naked 
But I have to have a cover on me, sum- 
mer or winter. I can't stand just a sheet. 
PLAYBOY: How would someone who had 
written something get a song to you? 
PARTON: Do you mcan to tell me that 
we've spent all these days and hot 
went through all this horseshit just so 
you could pitch me a song? 

PLAYBOY: You're a funny lady. Is it true 
you used to flirt with local disc jockeys 
when you'd appear in various towns? 
PARTON: Either my life is a total flirt 
or I'm not a flirt. Î just go in with open 
ms and open heart. I'm just using my 
personality. But the only ones | ever 
flirted with were the ones I was attracted 
to. Can't say I never flirted with one, 
but I never flirted with one to get my 
record played. 

PLAYBOY: And what about all the crotica 
you used to write as a teenager? You 
claimed you were very horny. 

PARTON: All teenagers are horny, some 
just keep it hid better than others. I'm 
itin' a story even now; it's pretty hot 
and heavy. It's got a lot of sex and love 
and violence and religion, all the human 
elements. 

PLAYBOY: Will you shock a lot of people? 
PARTON: Yeah; that's why I ain't puttin’ 
them out today or the day after tomorrow. 
When I decide to publish some of my 
hooks, I'm goin’ to write in the front 
that those who think they might be of- 
fended, don't read them. Then, if you 
are offended, don't blame me, because 
now Fm not just a singer but also a 
writer; and as a writer, I have to have 
freedom of total expression. 

PLAYBOY: Would you use а pseudonym? 
PARTON: I want to do everythin’ under 
ny own name, ‘cause when Î go down in 
history, I want to go down good and 
solid. 

PLAYBOY: They could put that on your 
tombstone: Good and solid. 

PARTON: I don't want a tombstone. I 
want to live forever, They say a dreamer 
lives forever. . . . I want to be more than 
just an ordinary star. I want to be a fa- 
mous writer, а famous singer, а famous 
entertainer; I want to be a movie writ- 
cr; І want to do music movies, do chil- 
dren's stories; I want to be somebody 
important in time: I want to be some- 
body that left somethin’ good behind for 
somebody else to enjoy. 

Everybody wants to be successful at 
whatever their inner dream I'm not 
near with what I want to do, with what 
I want to accomplish. When I feel like 
I have accomplished the things that I 
want to accomplish, then maybe I will 
personally think of myself as a superstar. 
l want to be somebody tl 
shines. A star shines, of course, but I 
want to be really radiant, 


"d : | P } Я, N 
ERR 
British taste/American price: 
The two sides of Burnett’ 
White Satin Gin 


imported Coffey still. The same kind of still thats used in Britain. That's 
how we keep our taste so British, and our price so American. 


PRODUCT OF U.S.A. - DISTILLED LONDON DRY GIN ~ DISTILLED FROM GRAIN • THE SIR ROBERT BURNETT СО. BALTIMORE, MD. * 80 & 86 PROOF 


“My hair is auburn.” 


“My eyes are green.” 


“My dress is vivid blue” 


m 


Getting the color right is 
what RCA's ColorTrak System is 
all about. It's a remarkable 
achievement. And it's one reason 
why last year RCA sold more 
color televisions than any other 
year in their history. 

Now, for 1979, Color Irak is 
even more remarkable. Because 
this year it tracks the color more 
automatically than ever before. 

. Before you ever see the color, 
the 1979 ColorTrak System grabs 
it, aligns it, defines it, sharpens it, 
tones it and locks the color on track. 


Fine tunes every channel, 
automatically. 

The 1979 ColorTrak is the 
most automatic color set in RCA 
history. It's made to bring you 
natural, lifelike color—the right 
color— without bothersome 
adjustment and fine tuning. In 
fact, ColorTrak's new Chan- 
neLock Tuner eliminates the 
need for any fine tuning at all 
Select any station. The 


Simulated TV picture of actress Samantha Eggar shown on а 25” diagonal ColorTrak console. Its contemporary 
cabinet design 15 highlighted by a rich pecan finish on hardwood, chrome plated base ard simulated wood trim — Model GC 930. 


ChanneLock Tuner instantly 
computes the exact station fre- 
quency and locks on to the right 


RCA's new ChanneLock Tuner i rating quartz 
crystal to locate and lock on to each тү channel "This 
precision device completely eliminates the need for 
fine tuning. 

channel. Smoothly. Silently. 
Precisely. Its secret is a tiny 


quartz crystal that generates a 


steady electronic reference signal. 


And the result is a tuner so 
accurate, you'll never have to fine 
tune a channel again. Ever 
Adjusts for varying colors, 
automatically. 

You've probably seen how 
colors can change when a com- 
mercial or a new program comes 
on. The same thing can happen 
when you change channels. Color- 

Trak deals with that problem 

- 5 

two ways. The color is con- 
tinuously monitored by the 
Automatic Color Control. If 
the color changes, it auto- 
matically makes an adjust- 
ment for you. So colors stay 


consistent from program to pro- 
gram, channel to channel. 

ColorTrak is also equipped 
with Dynamic Fleshtone Correc- 
tion that automatically keeps 
fleshtones warm and natural, for 
aconsistently lifelike color picture. 
Adjusts for changing room 
conditions, automatically. 

The same color picture that 
looks fine when your living room 
is dark may look too dim when 
you turn on lights or open the 
shades. That's why, as room light 
increases, ColorIraks Room 
Light Sensor automatically makes 
the picture brighter. The colors 
stay rich and vivid. 

Bright room light can also 
cause another problem: reflec- 
tions that can make colors appear 
to "wash out" A black matrix on 
the screen can help, by absorbing 
some of that reflected light. But 
ColorTrak goes a step further, by 
adding specially tinted phosphors. 


A black matrix on 
the tube helps absorb 
reflected room light. 


Coleriak also has 
specially tinte 
phosphors that absorb 
additional room light 
to reduce glaring 
reflections. 


This combination absorbs even 
more room light, to reduce 
glaring reflections. 


A superb color picture, 
automatically. 

Of course, there are a great 
many other automatic features 
that contribute to the magnificent 
ColorTrak picture. And your RCA 
Dealer can answer any questions 
you may have about them. 

But all the features and tech- 
nical advancements really come 
down to this: RCA wants you to 
see the right color. On every 
program. On every channel. 
Every time you turn on your set. 
That’s why RCA developed Color- 
Trak. And that’s what the 1979 
ColorTrak System is all about. 


Tu Ue ыыы нансы 
RCA Consumer Electronics. L 
Shae nan Dates ti 


пел AD 
Colorlrak 


RCA is making television better and better. 


rite to: 
5. 600 North. 


All the technical advancements come down to this: 


Getting the color right, 
automatically. Thats what 


2 the 1979 Colofitak i is all about. 


Т was FRIDAY the 
13th and yesterday's 
snowstorm lingered 
in the streets like a 
leftover curse. The 
slush outside was 
ankle-deep. Across 
Seventh Avenue, a 
treadmill parade of 
light-bulb head- 
lines marched end- 
lesly around Times Tower's terra-cotta facade. 

“HAWAIL IS VOTED INTO UNION AS 50TH STATE. 
GRANTS FINAL APPROVAL, 395 TO 89; EISENHOWER'S 
SIGNATURE OF BILL ASSURED.” . .. Hawaii, sweet land of 
pineapples and Haleloke; ukuleles summing, sunshine 
and surf, grass skirts swaying in the tropical breeze. 

Ispun my chair around and stared out at Times Square. 
My office was two flights up, in a line with Olga’s Elec- 
trolysis, Teardrop Imports, Inc., and Ira Kipnis, C.P.A 
Eight-inch gold letters gave me the edge over the others: 
CROSSROADS DETECTIVE AGENCY, a name I had bought 
along with the business from Ernie Cavalero, who took 
me on as his legman back when I first hit the city during 
the war. 

I was about to go out for coffee when the phone rang. 
“Mr, Harry Angel?” a distant seaetary willed. “Herman 
Winesap of McIntosh, Winesap and Spy calling 

I grunted something pleasant and she put me on hold. 

i k as the greasy kid 
т you about. He intro- 


HOUSE 


duced himself as an attorney. 
“The reason I called, Mr. Angel, was to ascert 
er your services were at present available for contract." 


wheth- 


be for your firm? 
o. I'm speaking in behalf of one of our clients. Are 
you available for employment?” 

Depends on the job. You'll have to give me some 
ils." 

"My client would prefer to discuss them with you in 
person. He has suggested that you have lunch with him 
today. One o'clock sharp at the Top of the Six's. 

"Maybe you'd like to give me the name of th 
or do I just look for some gu 

“Have you a pencil handy? 21 spell it for you." 

I wrote the name Louis Cyphre on my desk pad and 
asked how to pronounce it. 

Herman Winesap did a swell job, rolling his Rs like a 
Berlitz instructor. I asked if the client was a foreigner. 
Mr. Cyphre carries a. French. passport, 1 am not cer- 
tain of his exact nationality. Any questions you might 
have, no doubt, he'll be happy to answer at lunch. May I 


det 


114 tell him to expect you?” 


is harry angel, private 
eye, tough enough to solve 
the most diabolical 

murder mystery in year 


FIRST LOOK 


atanew novel 


"TII be there, one o'clock sharp.” 

Attorney Herman Winesap made some final unctuous 
remarks before signing off. I hung up and lit one of my 
Christmas Montecristos in celebration. 

б 

sixty-six Fifth Avenue was an unhappy marri 
of the International Style and our own home-grown tail- 
fin technology. I took an express elevator to the top flooi 
got a number from the hatcheck girl and followed the 
tre de back through a polite murmuring of executives 
to a small table by a window. Seated there in a custom- 
made blue pinstripe suit with a blood-red rosebud in hi 
lapel was a man who might have been anywhere between 
45 and 60. His hair was black and full, combed straight 
back on a high forehead, yet his square-cut goatee and 
pointed mustache were white as ermine. A tiny, inverted, 
five-pointed golden star gleamed on his maroon silk 
necktie. "Um Harry Angel,” I said, as the maitre de 
pulled out my chair. “A lawyer named Winesap said there 
was something you wanted to speak to me about." 

“I like a man who's prompt," he s " 

І ordered а double manhattan, str Cyphre 
tapped his glass with a manicured finger and said he'd 
have one more of the same. It was casy to imagine those 
pampered hands gripping a whip. Nero must have had 
such hands. And Jack the Ripper. They were the hands 
of emperors and assassins. Languid, yet lethal, the cruel, 
tapered fingers perfect instruments of evil. 

Cyphre withdrew a gold-and-leather case from his 
inside breast pocket, opened it and selected a slender, 
greenish panatela. “Care for a smoke?” I declined the 
proffered case and ched Cyphre trim the end of his 
cigar with a silver penknife. 
ny chance remember the name Johnny 
Favorite?” he asked, warming the panatcla’s slim length 
in the flame of his butane lighter. 

I tought it over. "Wasn't he a crooner with a swing 
band back before the war 

"That's the man. An overnight sensation, as the press 
agents like to say. Sang with the Spider Simpson orches- 
tra in 1910." 

“Johnny Favorite's before my time. In 1940, I was just 
out of high school, a rookie cop in Madison, Wisconsin.” 

Cyphre's features were shrouded in blue smoke a 
pufied his cigar. It smelled like excellent tobacce 
regretted not taking one when I had the chance. 
a city of outsiders,” he said. "Tm one myself.” 


іра 


"ро you by 


ILLUSTRATIONS BY RON VILLANI 


L 


FALLING 
| ANGE 


у 
. WILLIAM 


HJORTSBERG | ЗАЛ " 


PLAYBOY 


jg ment specified that the details remain confiden 


“Where arc you from?" I asked. 

“Let us say I'm a traveler.” 

“Fine with me. Why did you ask about Johnny 
Favorite?” 

The waiter set our drinks on the table with less intru- 
sion than a passing shadow. 

“A pleasant voice, all things considered.” Cyphre raised 
his glass to eye level in a silent European toast. “I took 
Johnny under my wing when he was getting started. He 
was a brash, skinny kid from the Bronx. Mother and 
father both dead. His real name wasn't Favorite, it was 
Jonathan Liebling. He changed it for professional rea- 
sons. Do you know what happened to him?” 

I said I had no idea whatsoever. 

“He was drafted in January ‘Forty-three. Because of 
his professional talents, he was assigned to the Special 
ainment Services Branch and in March he joined a 
troop show in Tunisi 
details; there was an air raid one afternoon during a 
performance. The Luftwaffe strafed the bandstand. Most 
of the troupe was killed. Johnny, through some quirk of 
fortune, escaped with facial and head injur scaped 
is the wrong word. He was never the same again. I can't 
be very precise about his condition. Some form of shell 
shock, I suppose." 

I said I knew something about shell shock myself. 

"Really? Were you in the war, Mr. Angel?" 

“For a few months right at the start. I was one of the 
lucky ones." 

“Well, Johnny Favorite was not. He was shipped home, 
a total vegetable." 

That's too bad,” I said, "but where do I fit in? What, 
exactly, do you want me to йо?” 

Cyphre stubbed out his ciga 
with the age-yellowed ivory holder 
Mr, Angel. I'm getting to the point, however circui 
1 gave Johnny some help at the start of his career. E was 
never his agent, but I was able to use my influence in his 
behalf. In recognition of my assistance, which was consid- 
erable, we had a contract. Certain collateral was involved. 
"This was to be forfeited in the event of his death. I'm sorry 
that I can't be more explicit, but the terms of our agree- 


n the ashtray and toyed 
Be patient. with me, 
ously. 


I tailed them through the 
shifting shadows to a com- 

pletely hidden dark ravine. 

Men and women moaned as they 
fondled each other, thrusting 
their pelvises in a morbid 
parody of ecstatic sex. 


“In any event, Johnny's case was hopeless. He was sent 
to a veterans’ hospital in New Hampshire, one of the 
unfortunate discards of war. But Johnny had friends and 
money, a good deal of money. Some of this money was 
invested, with Johnny's agent having power of attorney." 

“The plot begins to grow complicated," I said. 

“Indeed it does, Mr. Angel.” Cyphre tapped his ivory 
cigar holder absently against the rim of his em 
making the crystal chime like distant bells, “Е 
Johnny's had him transferred to a private hospital on the 
Hudson." 

“Do you know the names of these friend 

“No. I hope you won't consider me entirely mercena 
when I tell you that my continuing interest in Jonathan 
Liebling concerns only our contractual agement. АП 
that matters is whether he is alive or dead. Once or twice 
cach year, my attorneys contact the hospital and obtain 
from them a notarized affidavit stating he is, indeed, still 
among the living. This situation remained unchanged 
until last weekend. 

"What happened then?" 

"Something very curious. Johnny's hospital is outside 
Poughkeepsie. I was in that vicinity on business and 
decided to pay my old acquaintance a visit. At the hos- 
pital, I was told ting hours were on weekday after- 
noons only. I insisted, and the doctor in charge made an 
appearance. He informed me that Johnny was under- 
going special therapy and could not be disturbed until 
the following Monday.” 

I said, "Sounds like you were getting the run-around.” 

“Indeed, There was something about the fcllow's man- 
ner I didn't like." C 
his vest pocket. “I stayed over until Monday and returned 
10 the hospital, during visiting hours. I never saw the 
doctor again, but when I gave Johnny's name, the girl at 
the reception desk asked if I was a relative. Naturally, 
I said no. She said only family members were permitted 
to visit with the patients.” 

No mention of this the previous time around?” 

“Not a word. I'm afraid I made something of a scene. 
That v i 
the police unless I left immediately.” 

“What did you do?” 


phre slipped his cigar holder into 


“I left. It's a private hospital. I didn't want any trouble. 
"That's why I'm engaging your service: 
“You want me to go up there and check it out for you?" 
“Exactly.” Cyphre turned his palms upward like a man 
showing he had nothing to hide. “First, I need to know 
if Johnny Favorite is still alive. If he is, I'd like to know 
where." 

I reached inside my jacket and got out a small leather- 
bound notebook and a mechanical pencil. "Sounds sim 
ple enough. What's the name and address of the hospital?" 

"The Emma Dodd Harvest Memorial Clinic; it's lo- 
cated cast of the city on Pleasant Valley Road. 

1 wrote it down and asked the name of the doctor who 
had given Cyphre the run-around. 

“Fowler. I believe the first name was either Albert or 
Alfred.” 

I made a note of it. “Is Favorite registered under his 
actual name?” 

“Yes. Jonathan Liebling.” 

“That should do it.” I put the notebook back and got 
to my feet. "How can I get in touch with you?” 

“Through my attorney would be best" Cyphre 
smoothed his mustache with the tip of his forefinger. "But 
you're not leaving? I thought we were having lunch. 


ate to missa free meal, but if T get started right away, 
I can make it up to Poughkeepsie before quitting time.” 
° 


My six-year-old Chevy was parked in the Hippodrome 

arage on 44th, near Sixth Avenue. By two o'clock, I 
was heading north up the West Side Highway. I reached 
the outskirts of Poughkeepsie a little after three and 
found Pleasant Valley Road without spotting a single 
Vasar girl. Five miles out of town, I came to a walled 
estate with large bronze letters in the brickwork: EMMA 
DODD HARVEST MEMORIAL CLINIC. I turned off onto a 
graveled drive and meandered through dense hemlock, 
emerging in front of a six-story red-brick Georgian 
building that looked more like a college dormitory than 
a hospital. 

Inside, the place was all hospital, walls a pale, institu- 
tional green and the gray linoleum floor clean enough to 
operate on. A glass-topped admissions desk was built into 
a recessed alcove along one wall. Straight ahead, 1 could 
see a gleaming corridor where a white-clad orderly push- 
ing an empty wheelchair turned a corner and disappeared 
from view. 

The girl behind the admissions desk was young and 
homely. She wore a small black name tag that said, 


I found her spread 

out across a table, her 

chest split by a ragged 
incision. The wound 
brimmed with blood and red 
rivulets ran down between 
her tiny, pale breasts. 


PLAYBOY 


118 


к. FLEECE. "May I help vou?" Miss Fleece 
had a voice as sweet as angel's breath, 
Fluorescent light glinted on her thick, 
rimless glasses. 

"p certainly hope so,” I said. "My 
namc is Andrew Conroy: I do ficld work 
for the National Institutes of Health.” I 
set my black calfskin attaché case on the 
glass-topped desk and showed her some 
fake LD. in an extra wallet I carry as a 
dummy. 

Miss Fleece regarded me suspiciously, 
her dim, watery eyes wavering behind 
the thick lenses like topical fish in an 
aquarium, "Is there anyone in particular 
you'd like to see, Mr. Conroy?" she asked, 
experimenting with a weak smile 

“Perhaps you'll know the answer to 
I slipped my dummy wallet back 


e my jacket. “The institute is con- 
ducting vey of ble trauma 
cases, gathering info about sur- 


viving victims 
understand you have а pa 
ting that descripti: 

“What is the patient's name, please 

“Jonathan Liebling. Any information 
you can provide will be kept strictly 
confidential.” 

"One moment, please.” The homely 
receptionist with the heavenly voice rc 
treated into the inner office. She returned 
rying an open manila folder and slid 
it across the glass top in front of me. 
“We did have such a patient at one time, 
but he was transferred to the VA hospital 
up in Albany years ago. These are his 
records. 

The transfer was duly recorded on the 
form and. beside it. the date, 5/12/45. T 
ot out my notebook and went through 


n private hospitals. I 
ient here fit- 


the motions of jotting down a few sta- 


er so she could re 
Fowler." She tapped the n 
forefinger 

“He still work here in the hospital? 

“Why, of course. He's on duty г 
now. Would you like to speak with him? 

“If it’s no trouble." 

She made another attempt at a 
"PM call and see if he's f 
stepped to the switchboard and spoke 
quietly into a small microphone. 
amplified voice echoed down a disi 
corridor: "Dr. Fowler to the reception 
desk, please ... Dr. Fowler to the recep- 
tion desk.” 

Dr. Fowler appeared as if out of no- 
where, catsilent on his crepe-soled shoes. 
He wore a rumpled brown herringbone 
suit several ge. I guessed him 
to be somewhere near 70. 

Miss Fleece introduced me as Mr. Con- 
roy and I fed him the line about the 
NIH, adding, “If there's anything you 
can tell me regarding Jonathan Liebling, 
I'd appreciate it very much." 


es 100 


Dr. Fowler picked up the manila fold- 
er. It might have been palsy that made 
his fingers tremble, but 1 had my doubts. 
So long ago,” he said, “He was an 
entertainer before the war. Sad case, 
was no physical evidence of neural 
damage, yet he didn't respond to treat- 
ment. There seemed no point in keepi 
him here, so we transferred him to / 
bany. He was a veteran and entitled to a 
bed for the rest of his life.” 

“Well, doctor, I won't take up any 
more of vour timc. 
“Thats quite all 
couldn't be more help.” 
Not at all; you've been very helpful." 
And he had. One look at his eyes told 

the whole story. 


right. Sorry 1 


. 

I drove back into Poughkeepsie. stop- 
ping at the first bar and grill 1 came 
row. First, I called the VA hospital in 
Albany and they confirmed what I al- 
ready knew: There never was a transfer 
patient named Jonathan Liebling. Not 
in 1945; not any time. Next, I looked up 
Dr. Fowler and wrote the address and. 
phone number in my notebook. 

South Kittridge was a pleasant, tree- 
lined street not many blocks from the 
campus. The doctor's house w 
penter Gothic Victorian with е! 
scrollwork hanging under the ед 
lice on 
hedges screened. the yard on either side 
from the neighboring houses. 

The front door framed a beveled-glass 
oval, allowing a glimpse of a dim, wain- 
scoted hall and a set of carpeted steps 
leading up to the second floor. I rang 
the bell twice and waited. No one came. 
1 rang again and tried the door. It was 


a 
boi 


te 
ves like 
old lady's collar. Tall lilac 


locked. The lock was at least 40 years old 
and I had nothing to fit it, 

1 went along the side veranda trying 
cach window 


without success. Around 
-to cellar door. It 
a jimmy out of my 
attaché case and pried off the hasp. 

The steps were dark, festooned 
cobwebs. A coal fu 


was 


a pagan idol. I 
ted up. 
1 the top was unlocked and 


found the st; 

The door 
I stepped into a kitchen that would have 
been a modern miracle during the Hoo- 
There was a gas 
nge with tall curving legs and a refri 
erator whose circular motor perched on 
top like a hatbox. I left my case on the 
oilcloth-covered Kitchen table and ed 
the rest of the house. 

The dining room and front parlor 
looked never used. Dust powdered dark, 
ponderous furniture. Upstairs were three 
bedrooms. The closets in two were 
- The smallest, with a single iron 
bed and plain oak dresser, was where Dr. 
Fowler lived. 

J had a look through his dresser, not 


finding anything other than sh 
kerchiefs and cotton underwear. Sev 
musty woolen suits hung in the closet. 1 
felt the pockets and didn’t turn up 

thing. In his bedside table, lying next to 
а small Ieather-bound Bible, was а 45 

k 5 revolver. That 
issued to British officers 
World War Опе. Bibles were optional 
I checked the break-front action, but the 


om, 1 got lucky. A steri- 
ng on the washstand. In- 
half-dozen needles and 
syringes. The medicine 
ag. I examined sever 
containing prescription capsules. N 
жаз narcotic 

I knew it had ıo be somewhere, so 1 
went back downstairs and had a look in 
the old-fashioned fridge. It was on the 
same shelf with the milk and eggs. Mor- 
phine; at least 20 50-c.c. bottles at rough 
count, Enough to keep a dozen jun 


dizer was steam: 
side, I found 
three 
yielded nothi 


It grew d. 
bare tees in the front 
silhouettes against a col 
merging into blackness 


before 
A few minutes 


before seven, the headlights of an 
mobile turned into the driveway, I lis- 
tened for the doctor's footsteps on the 


his 


porch but didn’t hear a th 
ned in the lock. He hung his 
overcoat om the banister and shullled 
d the kitchen, When he tun 
the lights, 1 started back through the 
dining room. 

He had the refrigerator door open and 
was bent over, poking around inside 
“About time for your evening fix?” I 
sa 


ng un 


ned on 


He spun around, clutching a milk ca 
ton to his shirt front with both ha 
“How did you get in here 

“Through the mail slot. Why don't 
you sit down and drink your milk and 


we'll have a nice long talk.” 
You're not with NIH. Who are you?" 


ls. 


“The name is Angel Pm a privare 
investigator from the city.” 1 pulled out 
one of the kitchen chairs and he sat 


down wearily, holding the milk as if 
it were all he had left in the world. 
“Break nd entering is a serious 
crime,” he said. “You'd lose your license 
if I were to call the police.” 
I turned a chair around across the 
table from him and saddled it. "We 
both know youre not calling the law 
Too embarrass the 
opium den in the icebox. 
Im a medical man. B's perfectly 
within my rights to store pharmaceuticals 
at home." 
‘Come oll it, do 
(continued on page 178) 


I saw your works 


“Your father and I would like to have a serious talk with 
you... if your pimp will excuse us for a few minutes.” 


ns 


120 


A native New Jerseyite, Denise 
Creedon is moving west by stages. 
First she spent a couple of years in 
Austin, attending the University of 
Texas; then, in 1972, she went to 
California on vacation—and stayed 
there, settling down in the town of 
Agoura, where she designs custom 
wall decors. But whenever she gets a 
chance, she heads even farther into 
the setting sun—to Hawaii, where she 
frolics with her friends the dolphins. 
It all began when Denise, who has 
а master divers certificate, started 
studying 10 earn scuba instructors 
credentials. She met some people who 
were interested in saving whales; they 
all started making a film and—well, 
we'll let Denise tell about it in her 
own words. 


‘THERE ARE PEOPLE who believe that 
dolphins are our equivalent in the 
ocean. Such scientists as Dr. John 
E believe that the cetaceans—dol- 

is and their cousins the whales— 
fave evolved parallel to us, with large, 
complex brains that contain an intel- 
ligence comparable to our own but of 
a very alien nature. After all, dol- 
phins having evolved separately in 
such different elements for 50,000,000 
years, one wouldn't expect them to 
have minds similar to ours. 

My first contact with dolphins was 
back in 1976, during the carly days of 
the filming of the still-unreleased mov- 
ie FLO, a wildlife fantasy about the 
plight of the humpback whale. Sculp- 
tor/film maker John Perry and I were 
in Hawaii filming whales when John 
persuaded some local fishermen to 
Jead us to the dolphins. These fisher- 
men depend on the dolphin to lead 
them to schools of tuna. Fishing in 


GIRL 
ONA 
DOLPHIN 


some of denise creedon's 
best friends are cetaceans 


PHOTOGRAPHY BY RICHARD FEGLEY AND JIM HUDNALL. 


Denise Creedon, 24, lives in Agoura, 
California, but her home is in the 
ocean. She and sculptor—film maker 
John Perry have just finished post- 
production work on their film FLO, 

а wildlife fantasy dramatizing 

the plight of the humpback whale. 
Denise says that as things now stand, 
it's likely that FLO will appear as a 
two-part TV series this fall or winter. 
Denise plays a supporting role in FLO 
(the stars are whales and dalphins) 
and aiso narrates it along with Perry. 
Opposite and right, she catches a 
little relaxation time on shore. 


“There's a lova-rock island quite far 
out in the ocean," Denise says, 
"where there are deep, clear tide 
pools you can dive into and see all 
kinds of marine life brought in by the 
high tide and trapped when the 

tide goes out." It's off this island 
that Denise executes the perfect 
dive at left. “Dolphins pass by the 
island ail the time,” she says; "ме 
wait till they show up, watch the 
direction they're going, then 

hop in the boat and follow them.” 


the traditional way with rod and 
line, they catch the fish but do not 
harm the dolphins, unlike the mod- 
ern purse seiners, who use nets to 
catch. the fish and drown so many 
dolphins—who, like us, are air breath- 
ers—in the process. 

1 was spellbound as we entered the 
water and found ourselves surrounded 
by dolphins. For the first time, in the 
100-foot bility of the clear Pacific, 
I became fully conscious of their 
three-dimensional freedom. Only 
birds in flight experience the same 
freedom of movement. But dolphins 
have an advantage: In water, they are 
so buoyant they're virtually weightless 
and can suspend themselves effortless- 
ly in hydrospace. 

Accompanying us was our under- 
water photographer, Jim Hudnall, 
who is deeply involved in establishing 
а sanctuary in the Hawaiian Islands 
for the few remaining humpback 
whales. The films he shot were among 
the first ever taken of free dolphins 
swimming with people. 

Reluctantly leaving the dolphins, 
we returned to the mainland to start 
a publicity campaign with FLO, our 
100-footlong hot-air balloon, shaped 
like a humpback whale, which we 
conceived of to draw attention to the 
plight of the whales and the dolphins. 

I eagerly returned to Hawaii the 
following summer, 1977, to re-estab- 
lish contact with the dolphins. We 
were delighted to find the same 
ones—even to recognize individuals 
from the previous year. This time, we 
experimented with various forms of 
underwater communication. We tried 
underwater bells, flutes and harmoni- 
cas, which seemed to emit sounds close 


Denise gets undressed (left) in 

| preparation for a dive, as under- 
water photographer Jim Hudnall— 
according to Denise, one of the 

first men to photograph free 

dolphins swimming with people— 
checks his equipment. In a н of 
relaxed sun-bathing о! 

hard day's diving, Denise sits in p 
bow (far right) and watches dol 

phins riding the waves in front of the 
boat. Dolphins are air breathers 
who, according to Denise, can stay 
under for os long as ten minutes 
before coming up for a breath. 


Under water, Denise follows a 
friendly school of dolphins. Usually, 
Denise says, she swims nude—and 
without a tonk: “1 can move my body 
up and down like a dolphin without 
one and, besides, the tank's bubbles 
moke them nervous. They also seem 
to be agitated when you reach out to 
them from the side—as though they 
are made uncomfortable by beings 
wilh extremities. Divers who appear 
streamlined in the water get olong 
with them better." Which doubtless 
explains why shapely Deni: 
dolphin's best friend. 


to the high-frequency squeaks and 
whistles with which dolphins com- 
municate, We also showed them un- 
derwater kites made of shimmering 
Mylar, but our most extravagant ges- 
ture involved playing a grand piano 
to them from the deck of the schoon- 
er Sea Runner, through an under- 
water speaker. Singer/songwriter Jon 
Buckley even came over to try out a 
new number, Love Swim, on the 
dolphins. 

To be truthful, all these activities 
seemed to entertain us more than they 
did the dolphins. Certainly, they were 
curious and would come over to check 
out our latest antics, but their curios- 
ity was soon satisfied and they would 
drift off to their own pleasures. 

We spent endless days swimming 
and playing with them, observing 
their activities and social interaction. 
1 fell in love with the easy grace of 
their existence. Dolphins are the ul 
mate hedonists. They seem to spend 
little time hunting fish. When they 
do hunt, they arc so organized and 
swift that it is soon over, leaving them 
a great deal of time for play and 
sexual activity, 

During that time of first real con- 
tact, I often wondered how the dol- 
phins must have reacted to the 
unprecedented human attention. 
Gradually, I developed the impression 
that if communication were possible, 
it would happen on a different level. 
Watching them closely and seeing 
how coordinated their movements 
were underwater reminded me of the 
sort of communion that exists be- 
tween good lovers or longtime dance 
partners. (concluded on page 223) 


At the top of the opposite page, 

а school of dolphins surfaces for 
air. “Dolphins are far older than 
man," Denise claims, “and they have 
learned to live in harmony. They 
have no birth-control problems, ei- 
ther, because the females are 

fertile only once a year. | think dol- 
Phin research is one of the things 
most worth doing today, because we 
can learn so much from them.” 

At left, Denise sits on a deserted 
beach, watching her dolphin friends. 
Then she says farewell to the sea 

for the day and hammacks down for 
а much-needed rest. Meanwhile, 

her favorite cetacean, Notchback, 
has to cantent itself with an 

ocean devoid of Denise. 


personality BY PHIL BERGER 


OPINKS 


if the new heavyweight cha mp keeps his title, it won't 
be because he and the people who are pulling the strings 
haven't done their damnedest to lose it 


EW ORLEANS, APRIL 8, 1978: Leon Spinks was 
foot-loose again. 
dt was not on The Leon Spinks Calendar, 
the increasingly speculative chart of the new 
heavyweight champion's day-to-day appearances that 
his lawyers had plotted for him, but Spinks was gone. 

Bulletins followed. Spinks, it was reliably reported, 
was in the Jacksonville, North Carolina, area, his pre- 
cise whereabouts unknown. There was a woman in- 
volved. 

Spinks's flight presented a problem. An agreement 
had just been reached in the negotiations with a group 
of New Orleans financiers. The Spinks-Ali rematch was 
set for September 15 in the Superdome. The problem 
was that Top Rank chairman Bob Arum did not want 
rival promoter Don King to steal his thunder. 

King had scheduled a press conference in Las Vegas 
for that Wednesday, April 12, to announce his World 
Boxing Council title fight between Larry Holmes and 
Ken Norton. Arum wanted to stage his press confer- 
ence the day before. That required Leon Spinks, Jr., to 
be there. The phone lines hummed, 

On Monday, April tenth, the day before Arum's 
press conference, there was no change. Nobody had a. 
fix on Spinks. With time running out, Arum made an 
unusual move. He asked Butch Lewis, Spinks's Svengali 
during the climb to the championship, who had re- 


cently been exiled from the Spinks camp for leaning 
on the champ a little too heavily, to send for Leon. 

Dispatched to Jacksonville, Lewis located Spinks and 
transported him to New Orleans, apparently persuad 
ing him en route to let bygones be bygones. 

On April 11 minutes before the scheduled start 
of Arum's press conference, a Top Rank official dis. 
covered that room 1543 of the New Orleans Hilton 
was empty. 
ncc that was Spinkys room and since Spinks's 
wayfaring was by then a pattern, there was cause for 
alarm. But Leon, it turned out, was only tardy. An 
hour late, he finally arrived. As Leon entered, Muham- 
mad Ali ducked under the table at which he was sit- 
ung, in a comic show of fear. Lured back out, he 
(Кей on ріпку tardiness. 

“I'm important now, brother,” Spinks rasped, his 
bloodshot eyes twinkling. 

Ali inspected the champion's brown suit and the 
smartly knotted tie, turned то Lewis and 1, "You 
done fixed his tie and everything, ain't you?" Then to 
Spinks, he said, "You used to be quiet and didn't dress 
up.” Alis voice took on an exaggerated tremolo, 
/ou.. done... chaaanged, mai 
"You gave me my gusto, brother,” Spinks quipped. 
The crowd roared. 

“You don't act the same no more,” said Ali, pretend- 
ing to be perplexed. “You used to be early. Now you 


ILLUSTRATION BY ERALDO CARUGATI 


127 


PLAYBOY 


late. Making everybody wait." 

“Well, that the way it supposed to be. 
You got to let the smell come before you 
come.” 

"You crazy,” Ali told him. “E ain't 
going to fight you." 

In New Orleans, Ali adapted his wit to 
Spinkss rough-edged humor. The mood 
was cordial. The Ali ego did not rankle 
Spinks as it had some of his other oppo- 
nents. Leon liked him. (After he'd beaten 
Muhammad, Spinks went to Ali's dress- 
ing room, kissed him on the cheek and 
said, “Good fight.") Ali, in turn, was not 
bent on unnerving Spinks. His reference 
to Spinks as crazy was meant as praise. He 
had not been able to psych Spinks during 
their Las Vegas title fight, a fact that 
colored the comic material Ali fashioned 
from his defeat. At one point during the 
New Orleans press conference, he inter- 
rupted Leon, saying, “I'll do the talking 
now"—4à smile on his lips, 

"Now, wait a minutc. Shut up," Spinks 
said, acting cross. 

“You tell me to shut up?" Ali shook 
his head and looked out at the audience 
with an aggrieved expression, “I got to 
take all this?” 

“That's right," Spinks told him. 
champ now. 

“Yassa, boss.” 

It was perfect timing that had Leon 
writhing in laughter, his curled tongue 
poking through his teeth, He reached 
for the microphone and "Ali is a 
wonderful person. He's a beautiful man. 
1 Jove him. I love him with all my heart. 
Plus, he give me respect . . . can't get 
that nowhere.” 


+ 

If Spinks was feeling that he couldn't 
get any respect except from Ali, he was 
probably just reflecting on some of the 
events that had taken place in the past 
few months. 

Within six wccks of defeating Muham- 
mad Ali, Spinks had been sued by a 
motel for unpaid bills; had been sued 
for back rent by his landlord in Phila- 
delphia; had been arrested and then 
photographed in handcuffs for driving 
the wrong way on a one-way street and 
for operating a motor vehicle without a 
license in home town of St. Louis; 
and had been discarded as heavyweight 
champion by the World Boxing Council 
in favor of the numberone challenger, 
Ken Norton. By then, the reeling Spinks 
could only say, “I haven't done anything 
for anyone to take my belt, I ain't dis- 
respect no one.” 

And as if to add insult to injury, а 
lookalike of the new champion had 
turned up in Philadelphia. The dead 
ringer was, in Leon's term, "impostur- 
ing" him—signing autographs in public 
and encouraging local merchants to lav- 


108 ish complimentary goods on him. 


For a couple of weeks, the man sam- 
pled the high times that Spinks calls his 
gusto. Then he prudently faded away 

‘The man may. have known something. 
For by then, the. pleasure of being the 
real Leon Spinks, Jr., was paling. 

Nowhere was the pleasure more di- 
minished than in Spinks’s dealings with 
Butch Lewis of Top Rank, Inc, the 
champion's exclusive promoter. On the 
morning of March second—two wecks 
after he beat Ali—Spinks arrived at Top 
Rank's New York office to confer with 
Lewis, who had told him there was busi- 
ness to discuss at ten sharp. 

When Spink's arrived, the Top Rank 
office was undergoing a paint job, which 
left its quarters cramped for seating 
space. Leon settled himself on top of a 
packing crate and waited for Lewis to 
appear. He was still waiting by early 
afternoon, when a Top Rank aide won- 
dered if Spinks were hungry. Leon con- 
ceded he was and let the man buy him 
a ham and cheese on white. 

Lewis appeared shortly afterward, say- 
ing he'd been trying to track down 
Spinks's accountant. That Spinks had 
been waiting half the day did not appear 
to trouble Butch. It disturbed the cham- 
pion, though, who was beginning to re- 
assess Lewis' role in his life. 

"Throughout Spinks’s brief but tumul- 
tuous pro carcer, Lewis had been in the 
midst of the struggle for control over 
Spinks. The carliest infighting had in- 
volved Lewis and Millard "Mitt" Barnes, 
a white Teamsters organizer from St. 
Louis who was Spinks's manager of rec- 
ord. Although Barnes would retain 
30 percent managerial cut of Spinks's 
purses, he quickly lost the influence he'd 
had when Leon was an amateur and 
Barnes was his benefactor, investing tine 
and money in Spinks's boxing future. 

It was through Lewis that Barnes first 
learned that his past contributions (ac- 
cording to Mitt, he gave Spinks more 
spending money than strictly permitted 
by Olympic regulations) had been de- 
valued. After Spinks's fist pro fight, 
Lewis told Barnes that Leon's wife, 
Nova, was consulting with attorneys 
about canceling МИГ contract as man- 
ager—she wanted to be the manager. 

Barnes began to fcel a chill in Leon's 
attitude toward him. 

Spinks's disaffection for Barnes appar- 
ently was not so deep-rooted that he had 
qualms about asking him for more mon- 
ey. On August 8, 1977, shortly after Leon 
suffered an eye injury in training, he 
phoned Mitt for $500. According to his 
Western Union receipt, Barnes wired 
the money at 4:35 р.м. that day, An hour 
later, Spinks phoned back and asked for 
$1500 more. 

“l just wired you the $500," Barnes 
told him. ^I got to come to Phila- 
delphia—we've got a few things to dis- 


cuss. So ГЇЇ just bring the $1500 with 
me." When Barnes went to Philadelphia, 
Spinks had already received the $500 
and split. 

In Barnes's place, Lewis had taken 
charge of Spinks, involving himself in 
every facet of Leon's carcer, even track- 
ing the fighter down n he went 
A.W.O.L. from training. 

Lewis, a 31-year-old former car sales- 
man who had become a vice-president of 
Top Rank, had the animated style of his 
former calling and an inclination for the 
ornate gesture. In the Manhattan phone 
directory, he was listed as "Lewis, P. A," 
the initials referring to the nickname 
he'd taken for himself—Park Avenue 
ank's pres- 


ing, plaindalking man, distrusted. He 
suspected Lewis of promoting himself 
with Spinks at his expense. After several 
"incidents" with Lewis, Barnes began to 
think of consulting an attorney for the 
problems he anticipated. 

Spinks's trainer Sam Solomon had a 
wary eye on Lewis, too; he did not take 
to Butch’s idea of bringing in another 
trainer, George Benton, to assist him. 

Solomon, a short, rotund man, 63 years 
ge, had fought in tent shows and 
1 clubs as a se 


in Negro baseball. 
ual, 
but on this occasion he became angry at 
s authority as tr; undercut. 


called, "of being h Leon and his 
hael. [ ks had 
turned pro with Top Rank in February 
1977.] He'd pick ‘em up all the time, get 
them to the gym. Id tell him they 
needed this or that—and he'd get it 
done. Never a problem. And it wasn't 
until early summer that I started to see 
that they really weren't progressing. Sam 
was just great for my overseer, but he 
wasn't great in training them. In fact, 
Mike and Leon were complaining that 
he wasn't teaching 'em anything. 

"What happened is that one day in 
the gym, Leon went over to George Ben- 
ton, who worked in Joe Fraziers gym. 
He saw George showing fighters things 
that he thought he should know. He 
went to Benton and asked him, ‘Man, 
would you show me how to do that? 
Later, Leon called me and asked, "Can't 
we get Benton to work with us? ” 

Benton was a former middleweight 
contender who was training Frazier's sta- 
ble of fighters, which included Е T's 
own son Marvis, a promising amateur, 
As a fighter, Benton had been a clever 
operator, with a knack for avoiding 
punches, A classic stylist. 

"George himself came to me,” said 

(continued on page 132) 


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nine smart ways to look well armed 


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— 


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Aldo Cipullo-designed 18-kt.-gold English wrench 
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PHOTOGRAPHY BY DON AZUMA 


igner Yves St. Laurent has 
lents an the male wrist and. 
"beveled-plaque 1.0. in gold 


PLAYBOY 


pm INKS (continued from page 128) 


“The worst of it was Spinkss concern that he was 
being manipulated against his better interests.” 


Lewis, "and said, ‘Look, man, I don't 
want to start no trouble. 1 want you to 
know your fighter came over to me and 
asked me to show him a couple of tricks 
he saw me showing to some other fight- 
ers. I don't want to start no problems.’ 
Scc, Solomon noticed what was going 
on... and gota little pissed.” 

To avoid problems, Lewis held back 
on hiring Benton for the time being. 


e. 

By September 1977, the in-house pol- 
itics occupied too much of Leon's atten- 
tion. There were Barnes's calls to 
reestablish old ties and the warnings 
from others to ignore him. There was 
Solomon's resentment to balance against 
the advanced techniques that Benton 
probably could provide. There was hard- 
sell Lewis, pulling and tugging and tell- 
ing Spinks so many things that it was 
hard to keep them all straight. In the 
ghetto of St. Louis, Spinks hadn't had to 
worry about receipts for documenting ex- 
penses or about bcing on timc. 

‘The worst of it was Spinks's gnawing 
concern that he was being manipulated 
against his better interests. Two other 
Olympic boxing gold medalists, Howard 
Davis and Sugar Ray Leonard, had 
landed exorbitant guaranteed-income 
deals with the TV networks. By contrast, 
"Top Rank's guarantee to Spinks of only 
$30,000 for eight bouts was a pittance. 

If those elements were not sufficient to 
doud Spinks's thoughts, Arum provided 
another twist. Although Spinks lad 
fought only five professional fights (all 
won by knockouts), Arum signed him to 
box Ali for the heavyweight champion- 
ship. 

‘The original plan called for Spinks to 
qualify for the tide fight—he was re- 
quired to defeat at least one ranking 
boxer, against Alfio Righetti of Italy, on 
September 13. Spinks's eye injury caused 
the fight to be rescheduled for November 
18. As a tune-up for that bout, Top Rank 
matched Spinks against a journeyman 
heavyweight named Scott LeDoux in 
October. 

The LeDoux bout was what prompted 
me to begin looking into the Spinks 
story. It was not the fight telecast from 
Las Vegas or the news accounts that 
piqued my interest. It was what a deep- 
throat source I'll name Whisper reported. 
Whisper is a nondescript individual, giv- 
en to the sort of tinted glasses Spinks 
himself wears. On Lcon, it is for effect, a 


132 kind of flair. For Whisper, it deepens his 


seedy anonymity, his gray slouch of a 
figure. He is a boxing aficionado, though, 
with a computerlike memory for names, 
dates and the curious facts of the sweet 
science. He is also privy to all the in- 
trigues and bent turns of the game. 

"The thing about the LeDoux fight," 
Whisper said, “was what occurred out- 
side the ring, not inside it. There was a 
craziness at ringside in the Spinks camp, 
particularly with this Butch Lewis fellow. 

“Lewis sat down in the press тош... 
maybe 20 feet from LeDoux’s corner . . . 
middle of the ring. Into the ring comes 
Michael Spinks to fight in a prelim. And 
Butch stands up in the press тою... оп 
the floor . . . Michael is in completely 
the opposite corner . . . and Butch hol- 
lers, ‘Hey, Sliiiiim’—Slim—that’s his 
nickname for him. The kid turns 
around. Butch hollers, ‘Give me füiiive^ 
The kid dutifully walks across the ring 
and .. . you know that give-me-five thing. 
Two gloves, palms down. And Butch gets 
his jollies. Same thing with Leon when 
he comes into the ring. ‘Give me fiiitive, 
big man. 

“Then the LeDoux fight starts. And 
LeDoux, of course, pulled every trick in 
the book—the elbows, the thumb in the 
eye, the head butts. Meantime, though, 
he’s managing to bang home some legiti- 
mate punches, too. 

"OK. Leon was under a little pressure. 
And here's where Lewis began shouting 
instructions from press vow. I couldn't 
believe my eyes: Leon would tum toward 
this guy for advice instead of to his 
Torner! 

“Butch’s screaming and ranting led a 
couple of people to start heckling him. 
And he's done this before . . . at other 
fights, I've been told. ‘You got faith in 
that white man up there? Bet $500! 

“The morning of the fight, I'd run 
into Joe Daszkiewicz, the trainer of Le- 
Doux. He tells me, ‘Whisper, you should 
have heard what went on yesterday. 
LeDoux is staying on the same floor as 
Leon. We're going past the door to his 
room, we hear Butch Lewis inside, carry- 
ing on. Trying to psych Leon. "If you 
don't win the fight, you're going bach to 
the ghetto. You've got to win or you're 
through.” Really laid it on!" 

“Toward the end of the fight, Leon is 
dragging. It's his first ten-rounder. The 
word was that he'd been partying pretty 
good a few weeks before. At this point, 
it's a close fight. The shot at Ali is on 
the line. All of Spinks's people are going 


crazy. And here comes Lewis, running up 
to the ring ropes and yelling at Leon: 
‘Remember the ghetlol Remember the 
ghetto" Really weird stuff, but I'll give 
him this: Maybe it helped. Because Leon 
sparked up at the end. 

“The fight ended in a draw. After- 
ward, Johnny Mag, of the Nevada Ath- 
letic Commission wrote Top Rank a 
letter of reprimand . . . that this will not 
be countenanced anymore . . . that Butch 
Lewis is to be kept out of press vow. All 
that sort of stuff. А very stiff letter.” 

The unsettling atmosphere continued 
for the Righetti fight. Benton was in 
camp. Sensing Solomon's antagonism, 
though, he bowed out after Spinks beat 
the Italian, telling Lewis he wanted to 
avoid further hard feelings. Lewis, 
though, felt that George's expertise could 
help against Ali. He kept after Benton 
and eventually persuaded him to work 
with Spinks. It produced a triangular 
training approach that involved Benton, 
Spinks and Lewis brother, Nelson 
Brison, who was an assistant trainer of 
Spinks. 

“George,” said Lewis, “would phone 
Nelson and tell him things that he 
should be showing Leon. And Nelson 
would then repeat to Spinks what George 
had told him. This is how it was done! 
OK? This is how fucked up it was. And 
then, as the championship fight ap- 
proached, I said, "Look, George, we com- 
ing down to the wire. I need you down 
here . . . if nothing else, to work the last 
week or so. To do whatever you can do. 
And if you have to do it, continue doing 
it through Nelson. "Cause we can't afford 
to have any confrontations at this 
point” 

In Las Vegas for the title fight, Benton 
had to continue to funnel his ideas 
through Brison. He showed him tactics 
for defensing Ali and explained a strat- 
egy he had. The key to the Benton 
strategy was for Spinks to pound away at 
Ali's left shoulder during the fight and 
tire the muscles that controlled Muham- 
mad's jab, a weapon that had been cru- 
cial to Ali late in past fights. Benton also 
found a way to exploit Ali's energy- 
saving rope-adope tactic: When Mu- 
hammad covered up, bang away at the 
shoulder. When he opened up, throw 
the uppercut through his gloves to the 
chin. 

“Then,” said Benton, “the few times 
I'd see Leon alone, 1 never talked loud 
to him, Always talked soft to him. You 
can take a person who's excitable and 
talk him down by your tone of voice. Id 
tell him, "You're going to be champ. All 
you got to do is do the right things. 
Small things. Goddamn it, you'll be rid- 
ing around in a Rolls-Royce. I can see 
you with the pretty clothes on.’ And 

(continued on page 210) 


down. the alphabet, 
igar-cane island 


less to rich, pungent and 
ed. Recently; Statesiders 


ILLUSTRATION: BY GARY COOLEY 


PLAYBOY 


134 today, and a lot of that goes for 


have latched on to the charms of the 
blond Puerto Rican and Virgin Island 
distillates. But we seem to be missing 
the boat on the lusty, sonorous yo-ho- 
ho rums—the stulf that spurred Paul 


Revere on his wild mt and fired the 
blood of Blackbeard and his pack of mal- 
contents. And that's a mistake! 

While not as mixable as the vodkalike 
white rums, these full-throated creations 
are both versatile and warming, as the 
schuss and sitzmark crowd is beginning 
to discover. Dark rums are a mainstay of 
holiday bowls and nogs and de rigueur 
n а planter's punch, zombie and toddy. 
In England, dark rums are drunk like 
whisky, with a splash of water or soda 
or—in enlightened circles—over ice, with 
twist. Aged liqueur rums, rather scarce 
in the United States, can be taken in 
snilters after dinnor—or contemplative- 
ly, before a blazing 
ince all rums are distilled from sugar- 
cane juice, molasses or some cane prod- 
uct, what accounts for the vast diflerences 
in style and character? A number of fac- 
tors: climate, soil, water, yeast and the 
form of sugar used, but primarily, the 
tillation proces. Myers’s 
the prototypal dark rum, is made in pot 
stills—the distillate running off at a rela- 
tively low 140-160 proof. This is remi- 
niscent of the methods used to intensily 
the flavor and aroma of cognac and 
Scotch malt whiskies. Other procedures 
contributing to the heady quality of Ja- 
maica rums are the addition of dunder 
(residuc [rom the still) to the mash and 
the reliance on spontaneous fermenta- 
tion of wild ycast. The last is not quite 
chancy as it sounds, since cane stalks 
(which are natural carriers of yeasts that 
ferment sugar) are added to the open 
vats to get things going. Dark rums also 
require more aging; Jamaicas vest five to 
eight years in seasoned cooperage—a 
euphemism for old casks. Incidentally, 
there's no cause-effect relationship be- 
tween color and pungency, though distill- 
ers usually darken their heavier offerings 
with caramel. 

Here's a taste guide to the darker rums, 
based on place of origin. Bear in mind 
that there are bound to be variations 
within groups from brand to brand. 
Jamaica: Mellow, full-bodied, opulent; 
richly aromatic, with fruity notes. (A 
lighter golden and a clear-white rum are 
also made in Jamaica.) 

Demerara (from Guiana): Heavy-bodied, 
deep color, aggressive flavor, but not as 
fragrant as Jamaica; burnt or smoky 
undertone. Often bottled at high 
proofs—up to 151 proof. 

Martinique: Rich, dark, pronounced rum 
flavor—in the heavier middle range. Pop- 
ular in France. 

New England: Quite full in flavor, with 
a fairly heavy body. It's seldom produced 
voring. 


Haiti; Middle range but with a lovely, 
y; spicy, scent of cloves. 
‘The best has a brandylike quality. 

Puerto Rico: This island is known for 
light or white rums, but it docs pro- 
duce mellow, aged añejos and a number 
of 151-proof brands. 

Trinidad-Barbados: In the lighter mid- 
dle range—between Martinique 
light Puerto Rican rum 
Batavia Arak: Clear, light but excecding- 
ly fragrant. Seldom seen in these 
London Dock Кит: Simply Jam 
other West Indian rums that have been 
aged in warehouses along the banks of 
the Thames and blended in England. 

Ве © of its таге aromatic qualities, 
dark rum stars in the kitchen as well 
the bar. You'll find the half bottle a 
uselul addition to your seasoning sheli— 
for brightening fruits, sauces, pastries, 
roasts . . . and, at judicious intervals, 
the chef! 


RUM MANHATTAN 


Also known as the Cuban manhattan, 
this aromatic potion has recently sur- 
faced at smarter boites around town, 

2 ozs. dark rum 
y4 Oz. red (sweet) vermouth 

2 dashes Angostura bitters 

Lemon twist 

Maraschino cherry 

Pour rum, vermouth and bitters into 
mixing glass over cracked ice. 5 
Strain over fresh ice in old fashioned 
glass. Wipe rim of glass with outside of 
lemon twist; add to glass with chi 


PLANTER's PUNCH. 


Early recipes call for 1 of sour, 2 of 
sweet, 3 of strong, 4 of weak. Our propor- 
tions are more to the modern taste, even 
if they don't 

1 от. Jam: 

1 oz. Haitian or Trinidad rum 

Juice of 14 lime 

Dash bitters 

1 teaspoon grenadine 

2 teaspoons curagao 

Club soda, chilled 

Cherry, orange slice, pineapple sti 

Shake rums, lime juice, bitters, grena- 
dine and curagio briskly. Strain into tall 
glass filled with ice. Add light р 
soda; stir once, Decorate with fruit; serve. 


DEMERARA DREAM 


1% ozs. Demerara 151-proof rum 

14, oz. fresh lime juice 

1 teaspoon sugar 

2 dashes bitters 

1 tablespoon orgeat or Falernum 

Ground nutmeg 

Shake all ingredients except nutmeg 
briskly with cracked ice. Strain into gob- 
let over fresh ice, Sprinkle with nutmeg. 


KINGSTON SPECIAL 


1 oz. Jam: 
1 oz. medium rum 


arum 


101. bi liqueur 
1 oz. lime jı 

1 teaspoon sugar 

1 oz. cream 


Club soda, chilled 

Banana chunk 

Shake all ingredients except soda and 
banana briskly with cracked ice. Strain 
over fresh ice in tall glass. Add splash 
soda, or to taste. Stir once. Fi 
on side of 


Cold black coffee, sweetened to taste 

Place scoop ice cream їп tall glass. 
Pour in rum and mix with long-handled 
spoon. Sprinkle with allspice. Pour in 
coffee, about 24 full; stir. Add another 
scoop ice cream and top with coffee to 
fill glass. Serve with straws and spoon. 


LIME CAY 


14 ozs. dark rum 

¥ oz. 151-ргоо rum 

Juice of 14 lime 

1 teaspoon grenadine 

1 oz, canned cream of coconut 

% cup crushed ice 

Lime slice, pineapple chunk, manda- 

rin-orange segment 

Place all ingredients except fruit in 
chilled blender container. Buzz 15-20 sec- 
onds and pour unstrained into ceramic 
coconut shell. Thread fruit on bamboo 
skewer and lay across top of coconut. 


AQUAMARIN 


1 oz dark rum. 

14, oz. blue curacao 

û or. apricot liqueui 
9ле: spoons lemon juice 


Shake rum, 
briskly with cracked ice. St 


meurs and lemon juice 
in into 
Тор lightly with 


chilled cocktail glass. 
tonic. Stir once and 


RUMBLAST 


2 ozs. dark rum 

y 

2 ozs. pineapple juice 

1 oz. mango nec 

14 oz. grenadine 

14 tablespoon lime juice 

2te spoons cream 

Mint sprig 

Hall fill collins glass with cracked ice. 
Shake all ingredients except garnish with 
ice. Strain into tall glass over ice cubes. 
Decorate with mint; serve with so 

Exploring the sensory properties of the 
various rum types with a bosom com- 
panion can be a pleasant and rewarding 
experience. It’s à great way to get ac 
quainted with the body of rums . . . and, 
incidentally, with your companion. 


ar 


“You seem to have changed, Laur 
Are you encouraging another artis 


playmate ma rey hanson 5 
acting career is shifting 
into high ш her 
socal life 15 keeping pace 


PHOTOGRAPHY 
BY MARIO CASILLI 


ROLLIN’ ALONG 


IT HAPPENS all the time. You 
can't walk anywhere with Marcy 
Hanson without being stopped 
by one of her fans. ‘This onc 
happened to be a young girl 
of about nine. She sidled up 
to Marcy and gave her a big 
hi, followed by a Charostyle 
cuchi-cuchi bump and grind 
that got embarrassed halfway 
through and ended up a blush. 
A combination of audacious 
sensuality and cowgirl inno- 
cence, Honey Bee Novak—in 
miniature—rolls again 

For those of you who arc 
blind or who were out of 
the country last spring, Honey 
Bee Novak is, or was, the very 
sexy, very spaced-out coheroine 
of Rollergirls, an NBC mini- 
series that captured the hearts, 
minds and private parts of a 
large segment of America. What 
the Fonz was, or is, to teenage 
boys, Honey Bee was to young 
girls. Hey-yyyyy. How did Marcy 
become Honey Bee or, for 
that matter, our Miss October? 
It almost didn't happen, "You 


“There's a clause in my TV 
contract that says I can't 

do nudes. How can anyone 
object if 1 open my blouse? 
Even my mother doesn't mind." 


“The first time I go to bed with a man, I like to wear 
a silk shirt, one of his. You have to make the loving 


special. Sometimes ГЇЇ dress up in a garter belt and. 
138 stockings, or lace. We'll spend the cvening dancing." 


should have scen my con- 
tract. There was a morality 
clause [thank you, Marilyn 
Chambers] that said if 
you'd done nudity, you 
were unfit for television. 
Ir was ridiculous. They 
wanted me to be ashamed 
of my body. Every day on 
Rollergirls, the guy from 
standards and practices 
would pass the word to the 
producer, who would tell 
the director, who would 
tell the costume lady to 
hide my body. ‘Put Band- 
Aids on her nipples. Make 
her wear a bra and a body 
stocking. Then a jerse 
There was no way I was 
going to go out like that. 
Those Band-Aids hurt. Be- 
tween scenes, ] would sneak 
offstage, take off the Band 
Aids, bra and body stock- 
ing. Nobody noticed.” 

We wouldn't say that. 
Journalists saw Marcy as 
the symbol of television's 
preoccupation with cleay- 
age. Her personal life was 
as publicized as her profes- 
sional lile (Joe Namath and 
Rod Stewart had been 
dating her. Marcy gave 
good press. When a Chicago 
reporter interviewed her, 


“What's the most outrageous 
thing I've ever done sex- 
ually? 1 can't tell you 

that. Not for print. Oh, 
wait. How about the most 
outrageous thing Гис 

done with one person?” 


142 


Sometimes I think sex is my favorite form of sport. 
To quote a friend, it's the great indoors. 1 love it 
А man would bea fool to put me in the kitchen. I'm 
at my best playing, sharing, being a companion.” 


he asked, 

Marcy replied, 
not old enough to 

Marcy tried to keep work 
and play separate. “I didn't 
want to get press just bc- 
cause I was in bed with 
someone. I wanted recogni- 
tion for my own talents. I 
wanted to be Marcy Han. 
son, actress, not Marcy 
Hanson, girlfriend 

The last episode of 
Rollergirls was a crisis for 
Marcy. For a week, she had 
worked on adding dimen- 
sion to Honey Bee. On 
the day of the taping, a 
network executive said the 
comedy format 
room for emotion. 
her back to Disneyland, 

broke down. I called 

my preacher back in Texas, 
just to get through that 
day. I vowed never again 
to let someone else choose 
for me, to ask me to be 
Jess than my best. From 
now on, I choose for my- 
self." Shame to the man 
who put Band-Aids on this 
girl's spirit. 


TV Tunes In Sex as Crime Fades 
1 


Whom should the august “ New York Times” choose as the premier example of televisions new emphasis оп sex 
but our own Marcy (above left), then about to make her debut in NBC-T1"s series " Rollergirls’ —which, despite all 
the media attention, proved to be short-lived. That's Marcy above vight with fellow Rollergivl Joanna Cassidy. 


A1 left, Marcy splashes with July 1977 Playmate 
Sondra Theodore. Above, Marcy's with former best 
friend Rod Stewart at her 25th birthday bash. 
“We were trying to look sexy: Rod cheated.” 


PLAYMATE DATA SHEET 


NAME: Maney pk OMA ON 
E ea T 
нетонт:' Y^ wero: И? ston: 
BIRTH pare: Wats. 99. prereprace: 
сом: х9. عسل‎ Че dio & Jon. DAUM Ou mou SLO, 
Ue б. uova. wk a е vi ЧА. back Yard, 
а, pod рдл And 
TURN-ONS Оо, айд din tourer, wrth pundo, 
Ue uam vualo уо n 
TURN-OFFS: . ملس ممم‎ people , mu 
dio dut 
GREAT ESCAPES: хола {lm a 
Sey. And 


Cham oa dna 
FAVORITE AGE: wopr [Slo to 1890 - Romande, е 


Poot Jo, Oh dure мв wan ming; 
ойлон ts the a}, datiu and. 


PLAYBOY'S PARTY JOKES 


Please. Vd like a leave of absence,” the about- 
to-hecome-obviously-pregnant airline steward- 
ess told her supervisor. 

“Why?” she was asked. 

“It's because Гуе had—well—a sort of 
accident,” answered the 

“What was the cause of this accident?" pur- 
sued the supervisor. "Was it job related?" 

"In a manner of speaking,” sighed the stew: 
ardess. "You might put the cause down as 'p 
error,” 


e 
4 a 


When Neanderthal man lumbered home from 
the hunt, he was less than fully erect, accord- 
ing to anthropologists. That figures. of course, 
considering how ugly Neanderthal woman wa: 


Teenaged partygoers report that the new ver- 
sion of an old Halloween pastime is something 
called bobbing for cherries. 


Since the girl couldn't type, she was fired, 
Then explained how she'd come to be hired: 
"The executive's dong 
Being four inches long, 
1 thought shorthand alone was required." 


The man who had risen from poverty to fame 
and fortune looked thoughtful as his naked 
wife began to simmer sexually. 

"You know, dear," he mused, "at times, T 
Imost miss the old days. when I used to revel 
n foreplay—instead of leaving this sort of 
thing to the butler.” 


lı was at a homecoming dance that the hand- 
some but painfully shy young man approached 
the popular sexpot and mumbled, “Gee, I 
don't mean to be fresh, but if you, you know, 
danced with me, it would be quite a feather 
my cap.” 

Let's split and go to a motel.” twinkled the 
"and ГЇЇ make you an Indian chic! 


With the changes in sexual mores, people are 
no longer intent upon keeping up with the 
Joneses. Given group sex and spouse swapping, 
now they're more interested in going down 
with the Joneses. 


lı was опе of those classic confrontations in а 
neighborhood bar. “In my book.” growled the 
old-line ship's radio operator to the abrasive 
young feminist, "a woman is still basically two 
dots and a dash. 


Bur, my dear, this person is suffering the 
gonics of acute nymphomania,” the psychia- 
trist explained when his wife happened to 
walk in and find him on the couch with a 
shapely young thing. "I was simply trying to 
alleviate her pain by administering a tempo- 
rary anesthetic 


No longer a virgin, Miss Wise 
Arranged for a marriage disguise: 
It was surgical art 
That refurbished her part 
By constructing a tissue of lies. 


On her." exulted the girl watcher to his equally 
interested buddy, “the end justifies the jeans!" 


Two housewives were discussing the TV special 
production of The Godfather. “It must be a 
terrible thing, Bertha,” remarked one of them, 
“to wake up with a horse's head in your bed.” 

I should be so lucky," sneered Bertha. 
“With my Harry, it's a horse's ass.” 


(c 
Ф 
е ё 


Our Unabashed jonary defines massage- 
parlor girl as a peter maid. 


During a medical examination, the physician 
asked his female patient about some marked 


brasions on her knees and forearms. "Those 
е rug burns" the woman explained with 
some embarrassment, "from . . . well... from 


engaging in intercourse dog fashion 
"But surely vou know other positions,” 
chided the medical man. 
“Of course I do, doctor,” replied the woman, 
"but my Doberman doesn't." 


Heard a funny one lately? Send it on a post- 
card, please, to Party Jokes Editor, PLAYBOY, 
Playboy Bldg., 919 N. Michigan Ave., Chicago, 
11. 60611. $50 will be paid to the contributor 
whose card is selected. Jokes cannot be returned. 


Mg 


“Run out and get me a pizza during half-time activities.” 


THE INNER 
GAME OF 


SEX 


article 
By ROBERT SHEA 


zen and the art of 

foreplay—a 

took at the mental 

attitudes that lead to 
ood, bad and 

incredible lovemaking 


MERICANS do not enjoy sex 
totally, We are a driven 
people. There is a post- 
New Testament God keep- 
ing score on our bedroom games, 
and the newest version of the 
Protestant. ethic is, “Thou shale 
pursue a full, active, regular, 
frequent, satisfying, varied, ex- 
citing, healthy, normal sex life." 
We have had our sexual revolu- 
tion, but we are still governed 
by the style, if mot the rules, of 
Puritans and Victorians; we are 
compulsive, anxiety-ridden, com- 
petitive, relentlesly self-improv- 
ing, perpetually self-critical. The 
morality has changed but not the 
habit of moralizing. Sex, of all 
human activities, should be the 
one we enjoy most freely, yet it 
is one of the most ruled and regu- 
lated. The old regulations made 
people feel guilty; the new ones 
make them feel inadequate. 

Is there an antidote to the 
American way of sex? Perhaps. 
Japan is admirably free of sexual 
Бри One reason for this is 

influence of Zen in 
د‎ life. Now Zen has be- 


ILLUSTRATION BY JERRY PODWIL 


come popular in America, We've 
Вай Zen in archery, drawing, 
flower arrangement, judo, ka- 
rate, aikido, motorcycle mainte- 
nance, tennis, skiing and creative 
management. With all this, there 
should be а Zen approach to sex. 
There is People have been 
putting Zen Into their love- 
making for ages. The word Zen 
means meditation, and medita- 
tion means turning off the verbal- 
izing mind and letting what is 
be. So the emence of Zen in sex is 
to function naturally and pleas 
antly without bugging ourselves. 
Anything and everything we 
do can be a means of meditating, 
of doing Zen. Timothy Gallwey's 
The Inner Game of Tennis has 
applied this idea to Western 
sports, turning tennis into an 
opportunity to meditate, We will 
enjoy tennis more, he says, if we 
will do four things Abandon 
self-criticism; rely on spontaneous 
learning processes; concentrate on 
bere and now; shift our goal from 
outward succes to inner growth. 
‘These four principles can just 
as well be applied to sex. The 
first rule of the inner game, and 
maybe the most difficult for any- 
one raised in this culture, is to 
give up the habit of judging our- 
selves and everything we do in 
terms of positive or negative 
good or bad, right or wrong, suc- 
cess or failure. We all know that 
in any skill when we are self- 
Critical, we become awkward, 
stumble and fall, lose touch with 
the sources of inspiration. It's as 
if we had two selves that might 
be called the player and tbe spec- 
tator, Tbe player is pure action; 
it does not think in words and it 
needs to concentrate. The spec- 
tator observes and intellectual. 
izes. When the spectator gets out 
of hand, starts hollering out 
criticisms from the side lines, giv- 
ing unnecessary advice, trying to 
control the player's actions, call- 
ing attention to the score, the 
player develops two left feet, If 
the spectator starts acting up like 
that at a sexual performance, it 
will spoil that performance. 
For instance, a man may find 


PLAYBOY 


that when he is making love, especially to 
а woman he doesn’t know well, he seems 
to be two people. One of them is in bed. 
doing things to and with a lover. We 
might call this person the Player. Pu 
action. In contrast, the second self, the 
Spectator, is standing back, criticizing, 
like a director at a pornographic movie 
а very anxious director, who says things 
such as, "You've played with that nipple 
long enough, idiot. Go on to the other 
onc, qui Or, "She doesn't like thc 
way you're stroking her. Too mechani 
She's losing interest. Think of something 
else to do” 

Whenever you have to make a move— 
strike up a conversation, make а т 
mantic gesture, display your expertise in 
bed—the Spectator feels somewhat nerv- 
ous. Whenever your self-esteem depends 
on the outcome of some effort, there is 
stage fright, That terrible paralysis. That 
pounding of the heart, trembling and 
clamminess of the hands, draining hol- 
low im the stomach. The mind goes 
blank, speech and gesture turn to wood. 
You feel terrified of making a fool of 
yourself. It strikes when you are in bed 
with someone you badly want to impress 
It can ruin an experience. Liberating 
yourself from stage fright is what Zen is 
all about. 

You arc so in the habit of labeling 
everything either good or bad that it's 
hard to imagine any other way of think- 
ing. There is another way, though: being 
completely aware without judging. Stop 
classifying what you sec as good or bad 
and simply look at the facts as they arc. 
Tam a camera, For example, if a woman 
doesn't have ап orgasm when а тап 
makes love to her, he doesn't have to 
blame himsclf or her, or weat the inci- 
dent as a calamity. He can simply note 
the fact, recognizing that the explanation 
for it is not yet known. 

Millions of American women worry 
about their breast measurements. Mil- 
lions of American men worry about 
their penis size. Such concerns only 
measure the national insanity. И а man’s 
erect penis is four inches long, he 
needn't say, "My penis is four inches 
long and that's a disaster." Nor should 
he try to use positive thinking and say, 
“Му penis is four inches long and that's 
marvelous.” That would be just as much 
a distortion of reality. He just says, “Му 
penis is four inches long.” Period. Or 
maybe, “So what?” Scientific fact. No 
praise, no blame. 

Americans are obsessed with numbers, 
Poor Alfred Kinsey. He wanted to free us 
from guilt. He wrote that there was so 
much v; ion in our levels of sexual 
activity (he found one man who regu- 
larly had 30 orgasms a week and another 
who'd had only one in 30 years) that we 
should stop using words such as normal 


152 amd abnormal, much less good and bad. 


ryone has ignored that statement 
and remembers only that Kinsey counted 
everything that could be counted. And 
Kinsey's statistics have given us a new 
way to feel guilty. Four orgasms a week 
is above average, therefore good. One a 
week is below average, therefore bad. 
How many of you keep count of how 
often you get laid? Hands, please. Quite 
a few, we sec. How many of you try to 
count the number of orgasms your wom- 
en have per night? Still a great many. 
How many worry when either number 
alls below a certain level? That's what 
we suspected. 

But if we don't criticize our perform- 
nce, how are we ever going to improve? 
How do we learn anything? Most of us 
think we are taught the right way to do 
things by hearing а lecture or reading a 
book. ‘Then we practice while observing 
our performance carefully for mista 
If the mistakes are too numerous or seem 
insurmountable, we go to a teacher, 
coach or therapist. Or we read a dozen 
more how-to-do-it books. 

‘The instructions The Joy of Se: 
are so detailed and complicated that any 
couple who wanted to follow them would 
have to crucial passages printed on 
or lettered on the bedroom 
ап would need the coor- 


But also like an astronaut, he would 
always be working from a check list. 

It is possible to improve a skill with- 
out consciously tryin ct, it seems 
to be the better way. When you are try- 
ing to do something, the Spectator fre- 
quently talks too much, filling your mind 
with confusing instructions that are hard 
to follow. When the Player takes over, 
however, it will sometimes perform уй 
tual miracles, moves that arc. brilliant 
and instantancous and could be achieved 
only through inspiration. You've had nio- 
ments when you were on or hot and 
did something memorable, a clever con- 
ational comeback, a lled bit of 
driving that got you through an emer- 
gency or an inspired move in lovemaking 
that sent your partner to a new height 
of ectasy. Left to do its thing without 
a lot of nervous chatter from the Spec 
ator, the Player will fnd ways to grow 
and improve that surprise you. For 
instance, you might suddenly and spon- 
taneously introduce а new kind of sex- 
play in a relationship. The first time a 
man goes down on a woman, he may 
not know (unless she asked for it) how 
she will take it. She might see 
nasty pervert or—much more likely—she 
might love him all the more, Sometimes 
а woman will react both ways at once. 
Alter all, she has a Spectator and a Pla: 
er on her side of the net, too. 

‘There are two aids to learning with a 
quiet mind, One is the use of mental 


pictures instead of words. If people watch 
good golfers or tennis players 
or movies of them, their own game im- 
proves afterward. If you want to be 
better in bed, you should read pornog 
aphy, which provides images rather than 
instruction, and go to sex movies. Por- 
nographic movies are being exhibited 
with sound, color and wide screen i 
most of our big cities these days. Sex 
therapists have also recognized the value 
of visual images. Couples now spend 
weekends sprawled on cushions and 
watching both pornographic films and 
movies made especially for sex education. 

The other way to learn is through 
practice. From the strange point of view 
prevalent in this culture since at least 
the fall of Rome, getting lots of practice 
in games, the arts or business is praised 
ence, but getting lots of practice 
denounced as promiscuity. In 
in most things, the more you do it, 
better you get at it. Some people 
intensifies the pleasure of sex to 
save it [or special occasions. Not neces- 
sarily. Sexual malfunctions are morc 
likely to arise in people who enjoy sex 
only rarely, Nor is there any reason to 
fcar running out of steam. Most of us 
have a lot more sexual energy than we 
usually use. 


E 

То keep the Spectator quiet and the 
Player practicing, you have to concen- 
rate, which means keeping the mind in 
the here and now. Gallwey writes, "Con- 
centration is the supreme art, because no 
art can be achieved without it, while with 
it anything can be achieved.” He sug- 
gests that tennis players concentrate on 
the seams of the ball as it flies back and 
forth. You might try concentrating on 
your lady’s navel. 

Sex in the Western world is like an 
O. Henry story: the whole point is in 
the outcome. India developed tantric 
yoga, the use of sex as a means of medi 
tation, in which the last thing anybody 
wants to do is get it over with, In his 
book on tantric yoga, Philip Rawson 


writes, “Indian eroticism alw: sed 
on the inner state of crotic possession.” 
The ideal of lovemaking “is a protracted 


ecstasy of mind and body, whose fires are 
continually blown by prolonged engage- 
ment and stimulation of the sexual or- 
ns, not mutual relief.” 

Keeping the mind in the present 
ns not worrying about how things 


m 
will eventually turn out, A future-oriented 
man can be greatly troubled if he sees 


goodlooking woman on the street. 
There he is at five minutes to nine on 
Monday morning and all he can do is 
look. He sours the pleasure of looking 
by not being satisfied. It's no good, he 
thinks, unless he can have more. Or he 
is having dinner with a lady and finds 
(concluded on page 276) 


PLAYBOY’S FALL AND 
WINTER тыыны FORECAST 


ALL LUGGAGE FROM T. ANTHONY 


Above: A hot tip pays off—and so does the 
fact thot he’s wearing а ventless herring- 
bone jocket with narrow lapels, $300, worn 
with a wool knit V-neck sweater, $65, pol- 
ished-cotton shirt with a medium-spread 
collar, $80, single-pleated corduroy slocks, 


$115, and а narrow corduroy necktie, $13, 
all by Browns of London. The broad- 
brimmed wool felt hot he's flipping is by 
Larry Kane, about $25. (His lody in wait- 
ing's suit and hat by Bill Koiserman for Ra- 
fael; her fur by DéCor Furs New York) 


daring nonchalance, 
tough-minded 
individualism 

and a sense of 

the classic will 

form the approach 
to menswear in 

the months ahead 


attire By DAVID PLATT 


HE PHRASE attitude dressing 
really sums up the current 
men's fashion mood. Wear 
suspenders over a suede 

shirt with a skinny tie and your collar 

open; or wing it (the collar, that is) 
with a suit or sportswear that reflects 
how you feel that day. With each 
succeeding season, the essence of 
dressing for this decade comes into 
sharper focus, and по more so than 
now. The current mood results from 
the melding of many elements, in- 
cluding a new appreciation for clas- 
sicim (particularly, fine British 
fabrics), a virtual elimination of the 

"rules of dr as we oncc knew 

them, a sophisticated sense of eclecti- 

cism and the confidence to put it all 
together and develop your own look. 

Specific fashion trends on the rise 
include narrow ties and small shirt 
collars; narrower jacket lapels, soft- 
er shoulders and a less defined sil- 
houette; and a great deal of layering. 

This last works best when the layers 

e juxtaposed with different tex- 

tures, colors and fabrics, so that the 

total effect is one of unstudied in- 
souciance. Fashion today? It's a sur- 
prise party. And you're all invited. 


153 


154 


Above left: Mirror, mirror on the wall, who's the fairest of them 
all? He'd know if he could tear himself away from admiring his 
four-button wool tweed suit, by Don Sayres for After Six, $230: 
wing-collared shirt with four-button placket front, from Country 
Roads by Robert Stock, about $27.50; and a wool plaid tie, by 
Berkley Cravats, about $9. (His companion has almost slipped 
out of a bra and panties by Shuba, plus shoes from Maud Frizon.) 
Above right: Is baby ready for her bedtime story? Once upon а 
time, there was а nice man in а lamb-suede shirt, about $265, 


worn with matching double-pleated slacks featuring side buckles 
and vide tapered legs, $275, both by Pierre Cardin Relax; plus 
ап iridescent silk tie, from Chaps by Ralph Lauren, $18.50; and 
knit suspenders, from Country Roads by Robert Stock, $5. (Her 
nightie by Fernando Sanchez.) Right: Tea for two and two for 
wha knows what when he's wearing a shawl-collored sleeveless 
tweed cardigan, $200, over a ribbedstrim turtleneck, $150, both 
by Jean-Baptiste Caumont; and tapered-leg wool tweed slacks, by 
Aldo Valentini, $110. (Her suit and blouse by Gianni Versace.) 


156 


Above: Ah, the good life! Champagne, caviar and, 
best of all, a /wool tweed patterned pullover 
sweater with side-buttoned stand-up neck and ribbed 
cuffs and waist, about $80, worn with a silk/cotton 
Patterned shirt with rounded tab collar, about $65, 
and wool tweed slacks, about $110, all by Alan 
Rosanes for Dakota. (His lady’s dress by Stephen Bur- 
rows for Pat Tennant; her shoes from Maud Frizon.) 


Right: Porting is such sweet sorrow—especially when 
she's getting turned on to your shawl-collared wool 
tweed pullover, $135, wool tweed vest, $45, wing- 
collared flannel shirt, $45, and solid tie, $18.50, all 
by Alexander Julian; plus a pair of wool twill slacks 
with an extension waistband and double-pleated 
front, from Trousers by Barry, about $90. (Her night- 
shirt by Fernando Sonchez; jewelry from Gindi) 


PRODUCED BY HOLLIS WAYNE/ PHOTOGRAPHY BY JIM LEE 


it took 
the bizarre death 
of publishing heir 
john ile a 
to open has 
closet door 


article By ARTHUR BELL 


KINCS 
DON'T 
EAN 
A 
THING 


LASHBACK, three months. A 

man parks his саг on 2lst 

Street near the Dorchester 

and waddles toward Spruce— 

woozy, been drinking since noon. He 

is humming Brazil. It is always Brazil. 

Not the Aurora Miranda Brazil but the 

Ritchie Brothers’, “ "We stood beneath 
an amber mo-o-on.' ” 

As usual near midnight, the activity 

has just begun on this Philadelphia 

street. The man warily surveys the new 


Artist Vincent Topazio combines the ac- 
tual and the symbolic in his rendering of 
the people, events and artifacts involved 
in the murder of publishing heir John 
Knight. The inset pictures of Knight (at 
upper left) and his assailants (bottom, 
left to right), Steven Maleno, Felix Me- 
lendez {killed by his accomplices) and 
Salvatore Soli, were done from photos 
that appeared in Philadelphia news- 
papers after Knight's death. For the rest, 
Topazio had to rely on written accounts 
of the crime and his own imagination. 


PLAYBOY 


160 cery clerk 


autumn crop. Tank tops of summer have 
been replaced with checkered shirts and 
work boots. Young men decked out as 
constuction workers who have never 
seen a crane. It used to be glitter. Glitter 
and be gay. Now it’s swagger and be 
butch. Beneath that pierced ear, behind 
that strut lies the soul of a hairdress« 
he thinks. These are not his kind of men. 
None of this is him. 

He is diflerent. Swings both ways. Cer- 
tainly, absolutely, not one of them. Dab- 
bling in perversity, playing ticktacktoc 
in the nether world is one thing. Being 
like them is something he would never 
admit to himself. 

‘Are you all right? 
yan dress-alike. 

John Knight opens his eyes. He nods 
his head. The inquisitor stands close, 
puts his arm to Knight's elbow but is 
shrugged away. 

"Im OK,” he answers. 

“Just being friendly,” says the stranger. 

“I'm all right. Just need another 
drink.” 

Down Spruce. More of them. А pa- 
rade. Who are they? Where do they come 
from? Near the Warwick Hotel, he cuts 
off a side street and enters the 247 Bar. 
Cowboys, leathermen, telephone repair- 
mcn, ditchdiggers—only by night. By 
day, copywriters, space salesmen, book- 
keepers, shoe clerks, He stays for a dou- 
blc, then splits. 

At D5th and Spruce, lined up like 
cloned derivations of Joan Blondell in a 
Busby Berkeley production number, are 
several boys, some of them pretty, if you 
can see through the acne, They are the 
youths of the evening and the Warner 
brothers would turn over in their graves. 

He eyes the chorus line. He says hello 
to one of the kids with whom he had 
once tricked, The kid breaks from his 
frozen-pose position, smiles, his teeth in 
need of a good orthodontis 

"What's up?" the kid asks. 

“I'm horny as hell,” Knight repli 

The kid stares at Knight's lower lip 
and suggests they go somewhere. Knight 
rejects the idea. 

“I've got a friend," says the kid. “Some- 
one new to the street. 1 can fix you up 
with him, and if it works, you pay me 
thirty dollars. Pay nothing to him. If it 
doesn’t, pay me ten dollars. No hassle.” 

“Sounds good.” 

Slowly, the two men walk the four 
Dlocks, past the Allegro, where the estab- 
lished Philadelphia homosexual carouse: 
past Roscoe's, where the liberated homo- 
sexual adjourns alter his  gay-activist 
mecting. They stop at the Hasty-Tasty 
Deli. Signs on the window announce a 
gay dance, a dog lost, a roommate 
wanted. Inside, the cashier and the gro- 
Ik in “get you, honey" lingo. 


asks a Paul Bun- 


‘The customers are friendly а 
is brightly lighted. People actually сап 
see what they're cating—and each other. 

The kid sces his friend at the rear 
table. 

“Felix,” he says, “this is Joh 

Felix offers his hand. It is a long hand 
and he drops it into John's the way a 
haberdasher would slip a tie into a 
box. 

John sits down. He asks Feli 
like another coflec, He orders three. 

Felix is quiet, the kid chatty, John 
sulky 

Felix whispers, “Is this guy drunk?" 

The kid replies, "No, he's high; he's 
usually that way.” He turns to John. “Do 
you like Felix?” 

John nods. 

“So it's a deal?” 

“It's a deal. Here. 

John pulls a couple of 205 from 
pocket and asks the kid to take care of 
all the negotiations and keep the cl 

Five minutes later, a sullen 
Melendez and an impatient [John Knight 
leave Hasty-Tasty for Knight's $10: 
month apartment in the Dorchester on 
Rittenhouse Square. 
If we are to believe what Melendez 
ter told the kid, “Nothing happencd. 
We smoked a joint, then that guy John 
fell asleep. 1 stayed the night and he 
cooked me breakfast.” 

P 

у on the morning 


d the place 


of December 11, 
ngs at the house 
where I'm staying in Provincetown. I've 
asked my New York answering service to 
be cautious about routing the Province- 
town number, to give it out only in case 
of emergency. 

‘The call is from ‘Tom Morgan, editor 
of The Village Voice. No apologies, 
yous. Straightaway, he asks, 
been following this John 
I don't know what he's 
talking about, After all, I'm on. vaca- 
tion, enjoying the offseason quiet of 
P'town, walking the sandy beaches, retir- 
ing early, and. who the hell is John 
Knight? I tell Morgan that I haven't seen 
a paper or heard а radio since leaving 
New Yor 
ver mind," he says. "In a nutshell, 
the heir to the largest newspaper chain 
in the country got himself killed on Sun- 
ү. It looks like a homosexual thing, 
perhaps a It’s got all 

he earmarks of а great story: money, 
power, the works. They haven't caught 
the Killer yet. Can you get your ass on a 
plane to Philadelphia and check it out?” 

I hem and haw. On vacation, Away 
from my regular beat: the Foice column, 
the murder stories, coverage of the ga 
lib scene. Don't know a thing about John 
Knight. Don't know. Philadelphi 
Morgan is a con man with an irrcsi: 


no how. 


"Hav 


manner. Flattery works on writers. And 
this writer doesn't ordinarily ponder 
whether that flattery is false or sincere. 

‘Two hours latcr, I'm on one of those 
six-passenger shuttle jobs, flying south of 
the Provincetown sunset, and by nine 
rat., I'm in the City of Brotherly Love, 
where the streets are painted red, white 
and blue in preparation for the Bicen- 
tennial; and the closest thing to beach 
dl sand is a poster at the ла 
lines terminal advertising а winter vacii- 
чоп in Miami. 

Philadelphia. Former home ot P: 
е of the Cary Grant, K; 
Hepburn, J y 
Frank Rizzo. 7 a Flyers. 
The Liberty Bell. Marian Anderson 
Joseph Kallinger. The town that rolls 
up its lawns at six Р.М. and closes shop 
on Sundays. 

I check into the Warwick, 
hostelry two blocks from the Dorchester 
apartment where Knight lived and died. 
Room service brings up a Jack Daniel's, 
а ham and cheese on rye, plus the latest 
Inquirer, Bulletin and News, As ¢ 
pected, Knight's demise is emblazoned 
on the front pages. Each of the dailies 
has an exclusive story. The News, where 
he worked as an editor, plays up the 
“regular Joe” angle, Paul Janensc 
s managing editor, is quoted. as 
saying, "He loved the newspaper bu 
ness and all aspects of it... . He was a 
hard-working guy who took instructions 


sedate 


victims are usually painted as 
ts and one reads the gushy post- 
tem prose with a certain amount of 
cynicism. Yet there seems to be a holding 
back in the copy, as if the papers 
trying to solt-pedal Knight's homosex- 
uality, Г they don’t want to deal with 
it unless they are forced to, as if it isn't 
kosher to bring someone out of the closet 
after death, especially if that someone 
happens to be а budding Citizen Kane. 
But between the lines are hints that 
Knight's gayness was the key to his mur 
der. Allusious to a "secret life," a scarch 
through. Philadelphia's underground. for 
possible suspects, run through the reports. 
Iso rumors about diaries de- 
tailing his sizzling sex life. 

Having digested the papers, I leave 
the hotel, hail a cab and journey to 
police headquarters. 
as is just around the corner. At 
Homicide, holiday tackiness cov the 
walls. A blue Christmas wee with silver 
bulbs, silver ti nd angel's hair stands 
next to an Ame flag, and. next to 
that stands Chief Inspector Joseph Gold 
in charge of detectives on the Kr 
case. My timing is perfect. Golden is just 
about to announce the identity of the 
Knight killers at a press conference. I'm 
(continued on page 196) 


ur К 


~ 


~ 


“Hazim, couldn’t we spend a few days 
in Baghdad without your mother?” 


161 


eyes Ps 
ERP of AFE 


Girls Pac ЛӨ 
Part I 


coeds from five тоте far west schools 
confirm that horace greeley gave good advice 


IN CASE YOU HAVEN'T been paying attention, last month we brought you ten pages 
of coeds from five schools in the N.C.A.A.s far-Western Pac 10 Conference. This 
month we bring you ten more pages of coeds from the remaining five Pac 10 
schools—the University of Southern California, Stanford University, the Uni- 
versity of Arizona, Oregon State University and Washington State University 
we said last month—and pay attention this time, (text continued on page 


The three T-shirted 
USC coeds are (from 
left to right) Suzanne 
Birket (“Му hobbies 
оге tennis, baseball, 
doncing and act- 
ing”), Kirsten Reed (a 
journalism major 

who pilots gliders in 
her spare time) and 
Wanelle Fitch ("I like 
tall, muscular, strong 
men"). University of 
Arizona sophomore 
Helen Hestenes (right) 
is а psych mojor 

and а member of the 
university’s French 
Club, Movie Review 
Board and Ciné Club. 


® 
bf 


b 


гр” 


USC's Julie Lynch (right), an 
art major, is entering her soph- 

omore yeor with a solid 3.6 grade 

point average. A poli-sci major ot 
Stanford, Renée Masi (far right) 

has lived in Italy and Englond most of 

her life ond hopes to get a job in 

164 Washington, D.C., offer grodvotion. 


A native of Pennsylvania, University of Arizona coed 
Poulette Spirit (left) intends ta start her own business 
someday. An onimalscience majar ot Washington 
Stote, Beth Funner (below) is planning on putting her 
education to goad use; she intends to raise top-quolity 
horses professianally. Beth’s hobbies, besides horses, are 
skiing, driving exatic cars and playing pocket billiards. 


A psych mojar ot the University of Arizona, Lindy Edwards (above left) participates in three 
aquatic sports—swimming, woter polo ond synchronized swimming—and hopes to enter the A.AU. 
ational competition in swimming someday. Says USC sophomore Marilee Buster (above right), “Му 
best subject is sociology ond my моги is math.” Marilee would like to get into the publi 
relations field offer college. Another psych major, Oregon Stote University coed Sarah 
Henry (below) likes to water-ski and play pinball ond racquetball in her off hou 


"Eventually, I'd like a 
career in broadcasting ar in 


USC senior Nancy Amons 
(lef). А broadcast- 


incredible 3.8 G.P.A., 
Nancy is on the staff of the 
school newspaper, The 
Daily Trojan. Another super- 
ambitious miss is University 
of Arizana’s Erica Edwards 
(below), с marketing 

major whose goal is to be a 
corporate executive. 

When it comes to social 

“| prefer intelligent, 
ambitious, perceptive men,” 
Erica infarms us. 


amet 


үү 


ii 


Т 
| 


“I'm a bat girl for our varsity 
baseball team," says USC soph 
liso Lewis (lef), who wants to 
go to grad school and even- 
tually get into the fashion busi- 
nes. Part-time model Victoria 
Cooke (bottom left) enjoys 
camping, running ond water-ski- 
ing when she’s not ottending 
classes at the University of Arizona. 


"Та love to be on ostro- 
naut," soys Washington 
State coed Martha Thomsen 
(left), whose hobbies 

include body surfing, draw- 
ing, pointing, bosketball 

and softboll. A German- 
languoge mojor ot 
Stanford, Laurel Haniman 
(below) speaks French, 
Spanish and German fluently 
ond oims for a career that 
involves “lots of travel.” 


A fight end on Stan- 

ford's intramural football 

team (femole squad), Denise 

Bradley (obove left) wants to be- 

come a marketing speciolist or a cor- 

poration lawyer. Donna Marie Borrington 
(below), а member of the interdorm volley- 
boll team, is а senior at the University of Arizona. 


Oregon State's Karen Blessing. 
(above) is a business-administration 
major. Voted Best Dressed (and, 
she claims, Best Undressed) by her 
class, Toni Turner (right) majors in 
broadcasting at Woshington Stote 
and has done news commen- 
tary for а Spokane TV station. 


W^ 


“All right, who slipped me the rubber knife?" 


a tale of silent cunning 


from Certain Tragicall Discourses, 
by Matteo Bandello, 1567 


IN BYGONE DAYS, there was an entrancing 
lady in Naples called Zilya. Because 
she was half Saracen, she was arrogant 
and cruel and because she м half 
napoletana, she was clever and lovely 
beyond compare—or at least that was 
the way those who knew her explained it. 

The beauty first and next the cruclty 
struck many young men, but the worst 
wounded was a gallant named Virley, a 
man of wit and talent who cut such a 
fine figure, such a bella figura, that he 
might have stocked a whole harem with 
the ladies who sighed at the sight of him. 
Zilya only laughed in his face. 

She was no woman to offer her golden 
maidenhood to any man. In fact, it was 
gold only that made her feel warm with 
passion. She had inherited a mercer’s 
business from her father and had made 
it more prosperous. When she ran her 
fingers through the gold coins in her 
g room, she felt a fire in her loins. 
ley persisted. Zilya would per- 
mit him to call at her house, where 
she always received him charmingly 
dressed—and abundantly dressed, but 
always with one tantalizing oversight. 
One day it would be just a glint of 

shite bosom beneath some carelessly 
anged lace; another, it would be the 
silk gown that apparently clung to the 
curve of her thigh with nothing between. 
And Virley breathed in the false hope. 

Surely, he thought, there was a subtle 
promise in the way she moved, an 
enticement in the way she turncd her 
back, drawing the skirt tight so that it 
clung like the skin of grapes to those 
fine globes bencath her waist. And Virley 
would go on with his anxious wooing. 

In the end, Zilya wearied of the game. 
“Sir,” she said, "you are like a rain 
cloud. You burden the air with your 
‚ but I am mine own woman, Go 
d darken some other room.’ 
the gallant 
replied, “If I do so, will you at least 
give me a parting kiss for my love and 


hed the laugh of a Saracen 
captain belore he puts his knife to his 
prisoners throat. "Agreed," she said, 
"but you must give a forfeit if you truly 
love me, a promise to do what I say." 

"Yes!" said Virley in his folly and, 
taking her in his arms, he put his warm 
lips to her cool ones, thinking that he 
could breathe life into this beautiful 
statue, then told her that his life had 
be i 


gun again. 
She pulled away and yawned. “How 
my е; che!” she said. "How you have 
made them ache all these months. So, to 
ease the listening of other women, I tell 


Ribald Class 


you for forfeit that you must now re- 
main totally silent for seven years.” 

ley was struck doubly dumb. He 
boiled with anger. But he was a man of 
ply withdrew from 
assent, and went 
home to arrange his affair 

He sought out a clever servant named 
Pietro, who could speak French, and, 
with him, took ship for France. There, 
posing as a man who had been wounded 
in battle wi and had lost his 
power of speech, he took service with the 
king. For seven long years, with courage 
the field and wisdom in the council— 
where he would write out his opinion 
Tor Pietro to translate—he distinguished. 
himself in the affairs of the crown. The 
French king grew to depend on him, 
grew fond of him, pitied him. Finally, 
he decided to proclaim to all of Europe 
a reward of 10,000 livres to any doctor 
or healer who could cure his good cap- 
tain and restore his voice. So many 
charlatans then flocked to Saint-Denis 
that the king added а codicil—those who 
iled to cure within 15 days must pay 
with their lives. 

Virley made certain that the news of 
the reward was published in Naples. 
When Zilya heard of it and heard his 
name, she knew that God had put 10,000 
livres into her hands. 

When she 


at the French 
court, she dem: to be closeted 
alone with the patient to elect his cur 
They stood gazing at each other for a 
space and Zilya contrived to have tears 
glisten in her eyes. She had never looked 
more beautiful. In a voice filled with 


ILLUSTRATION BY BRAD HOLLAND 


emotion—for the thought of 10,000 
livres is a moving one—she exclaimed 
that she had suffered from her cruelty 
as much as he and that she now released 
him from his promise. 

But Virley spoke not a word. 

She began to feel a cold fear. It was 
no longer her maidenhead at stake but 
her very head. She reached down slowly 
and unlaced her bodice and her breasts, 
ripe as apples, appeared to view. 

Virley did not move or make a sound. 

Desperately, she slipped off her gown 
and stood naked before him, all the 
treasures of curve and cranny she had 
hoarded till then laid barc. 

Presently, the king and his men in the 
corridor outside heard a voice cry out. 
Then they heard moans, of passion it 
seemed; but when they went to the door, 
the one voice was that of a woman. 

just at midnight on the 15th day, 
Zily ken away to prison. Just 
after midnight, Virley spoke in a voice 

ating and creaky from disuse and told 
strange tale. 

The king gave a robust laugh. “Why, 
here is a vengeance, indeed!” he said. 
nce she has cured you, I grant her 
the reward. But since she failed to ac 
complish that within the given time, 
her life is still forfeit. And since I 
trust you, I give that life over into your 
hands. Take her home to Naples; keep 
her out of the counting room; and, as 
for your future conversation, I advise 
that you make her moan prettily at least 
seven times a week—one moan for each 
г of your silence, 

—Relold by Kenneth Marcuse 


8 173 


100% BLENDED SCOTCH WHISKIES, 86.8 PROOF.IMPORTED BY SOMERSET IMPORTERS, LTD..N.Y..N.Y. 


WHEN THEIR WORK IS DONE, 
EVEN THE LEAVES TURN TO RED. 


JOHNNIE WALKER RED ГА 
THE RIGHT SCOTCH WHEN ALL IS SAID AND DONE 7 


2O QUESTIONS: CHERYL TIEGS 


america’s hottest model and latest sex symbol turns out to be as quotable as she is beautiful 


he following short interview was 
conducted by frequent PLAYBOY con- 
tributor John Hughes, who has known 
Cheryl Ticgs for three years. He reports: 
“We talked in the morning in her suite 
at New York's Sherry-Netherland. Cheryl 
had just showered and was fresh, bright 
and scrubbed. She sat hunched over, 
with her elbows on her knees, gestured 
quently with her hands, smiled a great 
deal and answered most of my questions 
quickly and impulsively. 1 found her to 
be a warm, intelligent woman who is so 
beautiful that I'm sure she could stop an 
elephant’s heart at 30 paces.” 
1. praypoy: On a scale of one to ten, 
how would you rate your looks? 
mires: Compared with everybody else in 
the world, I'd have to say ten. People 
would kill me if I said an eight or a six 
or a two. By my own standards—oh, 
eight or nine. My ears stick out, but I 
hide that. 
2 PLAYBOY: If it were 1943, would you 
want your likeness on the nose of a B-17? 
mecs: Yes, yes. Because it would have 
given them something to dream of. And 
I like my image and so, therefore, I 
would like for them to dream of me. 
Part of my popularity is that Im a real 
person, and I really don't have а cold 
exterior, I have a warmth. So I think 
that people want an image to look up to 
that ts real, that is not untouchable. 
3. PLAYBoy: There's old myth that 
beautiful girls have ugly girls for best 
friends. Do you? 
aires: No, I have beautiful best fri 
One is a model, one's in the fashion 
business. I like beauty, but beauty 
doesn't have to be physical beauty. I 
don't just have pretty girls as friends, 
but I don't have ugly people as friends. 
4. PLAYBOY: What was your first model- 
ing job? 
mecs: I tried out for little beauty pag- 
cants and never won. My best friend, 
who was preti nd more charming 
than I, was 


nd 


TEGS: So many people have told me that 
1 should have one made, but I haven't 
pursued іс. I don't know if I want tli 
dcs very dehumanizing to be a doll. And 


PHOTOGRAPHY BY BILL KING 


I think that I've just spent the last 14 
years being а mannequin, so I don't want 
uh эре anymor 
7. PLAYBOY: Was there some pivotal de- 
cision that you made that really boosted 
vour career to the top? 

Tics: When I decided to do a poster. 
All my fan leuers were from boys in high 
school and college asking for posters. So 
it was my idea, but 1 was discouraged by 
1 agent who said I'd only get ten per- 
cent, etc, etc. So I forgot about it for a 
couple of weeks and I thought, Well, I'm 
going to do it anyway. So I did i 
8. PLAYBOY: In the Time cover story, 
you appeared in a see-through fish-net 
. Did you know it was see- 
through beforehand? 

tires: No, because I tried it on in the 
dressing room and when it's dry, you 
t see through it. I've taken many 
picture in fish net before and you can't 
sec through it, We were in the Amazon 
and there was no way that 1 was going 
to go into the water with the crocodiles 
and piranhas. So I thought, OK, ЕШ wear 
the suit. Well, it was sunset and the 
5 so bad and the photographer 
Please go in,” and I had never 
scen a suit wet before and then it was 
published and you could sce through 
"There's no excuse. I'm not trying to say, 
"Oh. my God, I didn't know that you 
could see through it.” To me, it wasn't 
that bad. but they got a lot of letters 
from it. Americans are such puritans. 
Nudity is not that bad, and it wasn't 


nude and there was nothing provocative 
about it. Even if I had known that you 
could sec through it, maybe I would have 


done il 


nyway. 
9. vLAYBOY: Your image is that of the all- 
American girl. Are you happy about it 
"itc: Yeah. I happen to be a lover of 
America. I did this cheerleading spec 
I was one of the judges, and all of a 
sudden, I had tears in my eyes and I 
was beaming. I mean, these beautiful 
kids did their cheerleading and it w 
just so all-American—they were so cle 
cut and so beautiful. And 1 thought, If 
you did that in some foreign country, it 
just wouldn't be the same. I really like 
America. America is very healthy. The 
Il-Americ ge? Yeah, I like it. 

10. rLaysoy: Would you like to sing at 
the White House? 

"iris: Nobody's invited me. I can't sing 
or dance. 

11. PLAYBOY 


For whom did you vote in 


the last two Presidential elections? 

tees: I voted for Carter the last time 
and I was out of the country before that. 
12. pLaysoy: Who were your childhood 
heroes? 

tics: I liked Pat Boone. He was so 
dean-cut and all-American. Everybody 
else was crazy about Elvis Presley 
13. PLAYBOY: You weren't an Elvis fan? 
tires: Not as much. At that time, Elvis 
was the bad guy and Pat Boone was the 
good guy. You know, black and white. 1 
had a crush on Pat Boone. 

14. PLAYBoy: Were you ever а brownie? 

à brownie, then a girl scout. 
Were you a good brownie 
rl scout? 


good girl. Not always, but . .. Yes, Т 
I was very shy, but I was alw 
y popular. | was always the tallest 
girl in the class and that made me very 
shy. I would slump down a little bit. But 
1 was never an ugly duckling. I was never 
I 
y. Although I 
ays wanted to be five feet, one 

: Has any тап ever stood 
you up or dumped you? 
s onc boy in college I 
was crazy about, but he wasn’t so inte 
ested in me. We dated and we saw each 
other, but I never really snagged him. 
But other than that, it's a pretty good 
record. 
17. rLAYBO 
school prom? 
‘ites: Everybody always went to two or 
three proms in high school. I only went 
the last Т wasn't invited the other 
ars 1 went the last year and I wa 
prom princess and my best friend. got 
prom queen. 
18. FLAYBoy: Do you throw things when 
you get mad? 
‘vires: If I'm really angry at my husband, 
FIL hit him in the arm or something like 
that. I don’t throw things at walls. TI 
throw a pillow at him or something. Im 
always controlled. I wouldn't throw a 
tennis racket at him or a knife or any- 
thing like that. But I get angry enough 
that 1 hit things. 
19. PLAYBOY: Are you always as graceful 
as you appear to bez 
1 I spill everything. Every time I 
cat, whatever I eat, I spill. 
20. rraymov: One last question: 
you marry me? 
T No. 


Did you go to your high 


PLAYBOY 


178 


FALLING ANGEL 


(continued from page 118) 


“I took a bottle of morphine off the top shelf to 
bait the hook and started upstairs." 


cooking in the bathroom. How long have 
you been hooked?” 

"m not... an addict!" Dr. Fowler 
sagged within the folds of his oversized 
suit. He seemed to be shrinking before 
my eyes. "What do you want with me: 
Hc propped his head in his hands. 

"Same thing 1 was after back at the 
hospital" 1 said. "Information about 
Jonathan Liebling. 

Туе told you everything I know 

"Doc, let's not kid around. Liebling 
was never transferred to any VA hos- 
pital. I know because I called Albany 
myself and checked it. Not smart making 
up a story as thin as that.” 

Dr. Fowler groaned. “I knew it was all 
over when he finally had a visitor. In 
almost 15 years, there were never any 
visitors, not one.” 

"Sounds like a popular guy," I said. 
Where is he now: 
1 don't know." Dr. Fowler pulled 
himself upright. It seemed to take all he 
had in him to get the job donc. "I 
haven't seen him since he was my patient 
during the war." 

"He must h 
doctor." 

“L have no idea where, Some people 
came one night long ago. He got into a 
car with them and drove away. I never 
saw him aga 

"Into a car? I thought he was supposed 
10 be a vegetable." 

The doctor rubbed his eyes and 
blinked, "When he t came to us, he 
was in а coma, But he responded well to 
treatment and within a month was up 
and around. We used to play table ten- 
s in the afternoons.” 

Then he was normal when he left 
Normal? Hateful word, normal." Dr. 
Fowler's nervous, drumming fingers 
clenched into fists on the faded oilcloth. 
On his left hand, he wore a gold signet 
ring engraved with a five-pointed s 
“To wer your question, Liebling was 
not the same as you or me. After recover- 
ing his senses, he continued to suffer 
fre сше amnesia. 
You mean he had no memor 

"None whatsoever. Not even his name 
meant anything to him. I said he left 
with friends; I have only their word for 
it about that. Jonathan Liebling didn't 
recognize them. "They were strangers to 
him." 

"Tell me more about these friends. 
Who were they? What were th 
The doctor pressed his trembling 


ave gone someplace, 


names? 


fingers to his temples. “It’s been so long. 
rs. I've done my best to 


"Don't you go pleading 
me, doc." 
There were two of them," he said, 
speaking very slowly, the words dragged 
out of the distance and filtered through 
layers of regret. "A man and a woman, 1 
can't tell you g about the woman; 
staved in the car. I'd 
never seen her before. The man was Ше 
one who made all the arrangement: 
"What was his name?” 
“He said it was Edward Kelle 
I made a note in my little black book. 
“What about the arrangements you men- 
tioned? What was the deal there?" 
"Money." The doctor spat the word 
out as if it were a piece of rotten meat. 
“Isn't every man supposed to have his 
се?” 


amnesia оп 


ty-five thousand dollars.” 
"What did Kelley want for 
money?" 

“What you probably alr 
discharge Jonathan Liebli 


keeping a record. Destroy а 


intain the pret 
nt at Emma Harvest Memor 
“Which is just what you did.” 
“It wasn't very dilhicult. Aside from 
Kelley, he never hı y 
“What about the hospital? Didn't the 
administration suspect it was missing a 
patient? 

Why should they? I kept his charts up 
to date, week by weel nd every month 
a check came from Liebling’s trust fund 
to cover his expenses. As long as the bills 
are paid, no one is going to ask tno many 
questions. After a while, all I had to do 
was fill out a legal affidavit that arrived. 
cvery six months from a law firm in New 
York." 

“McIntosh, Winesap and Spy?” 

“That's the опе” Dr. Fowler raised 
his haunted eyes from the tabletop and 
met my gaze 


t to know 
little things, 
hobbies, how he liked his eggs. What 
color were his eyes?” 
7] can't remember. 
Give me what you can. Start with a 
physical description. 
“I have no idea what he looked like. 
“Don't cr h me, doc.” 
I'm telling the truth. Young Li 


p around w 


bling 


came to u 
restoration. 
Plastic surgery? 
"Yes. His head was swathed in band- 
ages for his entire stay. I wasn't the one 
who changed the dressings and so had 
по opportunity to see his face.” 

I stood up and leaned against the 
table. "Give me what you can about 
Edward Kelley." 

Its been a long time, 
said, "and people chang: 

"Having another amnesia attack?” 

“Its been more than fifteen years. 
What do you expect 

“Doc, you're stalling me.” I reached 
down d took hold of the knot in his 
necktie. When 1 lifted, he came up to 
meet me as easily as an empty husk. 
“Save yourself some trouble. Don't make 
me squeeze the truth out of you. 

"I've told you all 1 can." 

"Why are you shielding Kelle 

I'm not. I hardly knew him. I——" 
IE you weren't such an old fart, Td 
bust you up like a soda cracker." 1 
jerked the knot in his tie a touch tighter. 
"Why wear myself out when there's an 
easier way?” Dr. Fowler's bloodshot eyes 
“You're in а cold 
t, aren't you, doc? Can't wait to 
nine the junk in your fridge. 
veryone needs something to help 
him forget," he whispered. 

I don't want you to forget. I want 
you to remember." I took him by his arm 
and steered him from the kitchen. 
“That's why we're going upstairs to your 
room, where you can think things over 
while I go out and grab a bite to eat." 

“What do you want to know? Kelley 
had dark hair and one of those thin 
mustaches Clark Gable made popular.” 

Not good enough, doc." I bullied him 
up the stairs by the collar of his tweed 
jacket. “A couple hours’ cold turkey 
esh your ory.” 1 pushed 
through the narrow door of his 
Spartan room and he fell forward onto 
the bed. "You think it over, doc.” 

"Had perfect teeth. The most engag- 
ing smile. Please don't 

I closed the door behind me and 
turned the long-handled key in the lock. 

. 

Tt was alter midnight when I got back 
to Dr. Fowler's place. I let myself in the 
front door and walked back through the 
1 to the kitchen, The refrigerator 
the shadows. I took a bottle of 
morphine off the top shelf to bait the 
hook and started upstairs. The bedroom 
door was locked tight. 

“Be right with you, doc," I called, 
fumbling in my pockets for the ke; 
brought you a little taste.” 

I turned the key and opened the door. 
Dr. Albert Fowler didn't d. He 
was propped against the pillows, still 


following intensive facial 


the doctor 


broadcast his fear. 
sw 


mea 


aw 


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PLAYBOY 


wearing the brown herringbone suit. The 
framed photograph of а woman was 
clutched to his chest in his left hand. In 
his right, he held the Webley Mark 5. 
He was shot through the right eye. 
Thickened blood welled in the wound 
like ruby tears. Concussion drove the 
other eye halfway out of its socket, giving 
him the goggling stare of a tropical fish. 

I touched the back of his hand. It was 
cold as something hanging in a butcher- 
shop window. Before I touched anything 
else, I opened шу attaché case and put 
on а pair of latex surgeon's gloves I took 
from the snap-front pocket inside the lid 

The door was locked and I had the key 
in my pocket. Suicide was the only logi 
cal explanation. “And if thine eye offend 
thee,” I muttered, trying to put my fin- 
ger on what was out of place. 

I picked the leather-bound Bible off 
the bedside table and an open box of 
cartridges tumbled out onto the rug. 
The book was hollow inside, а dummy. 
I was the dummy for not finding the 
bullets carlier. I picked them off the 
floor, groping under the bed for strays, 
and put them back inside the empty 
Bible. 

I went over the room with my hand- 
kerchief, wiping cverything I had 
touched during my initial search. The 
Poughkeepsie police wouldn't exactly be 
rmed by the idea of an out-of-town 
private eye bullying one of their prom 
nent citizens into suicide. I told myself if 
it was suicide, they wouldn't look for 
prints and kept on wiping. 

The drive back to the city provided 
plenty of time for thought. I didn't like 
the idea that I had hounded an old man 
to his death, It was a bad mistake locking 
him up with a gun like that. Bad for me, 
because the doc had a lot more to tell, 

1 tried to fix the scene in my mind like 
a photo. Dr. Fowler stretched on the bed 
with а hole his eve and his brains 
spread across the counterpane. The 
framed photograph from up on the 
burcau was locked in the doctor's cooling 
grip. His finger rested on the revolver's 
trigger. 

No matter how many times I went 
over the scene, there was something miss- 
ing, a piece gone out of the puzzle. But 
which piece? And where did it fit? I had 
nothing to go on but my instincts. A 
ging hunch that wouldn't let go. I 
was sure Dr. Albert Fowler's death was 
not suicide. It was murder. 

. 
fonday morning was fair and cold, It 
was a little after ten when I unlocked 
the inner-office door. The usual bad news 
across the street: "NEW IRAQ ATTACK ON 
SYRIA ALLEGED . . . GUARD WOUNDED IN 
BORDER INCURSION BY BAND OF 30, .,." I 
phoned Herman Winesap's Wall Street 
law firm and the machine-tooled secre- 


180 tary put me straight through. 


"And what might I do for you today, 
Mr. Angel?" the attorney asked, his voice 
smooth as a меоед hinge. 

“I tried calling you over the weekend, 
but the maid said you were out at Sag 
Harbor. 

“I keep a place there where I сап 
relax, No phone. Has something impor- 
tant come up?" 

“That information would be for Mr. 
Cyphre. I couldn't find him in the phone 
book, either. 

"Your timing is perfect. Mr. Cyphre is 

tting across from me this very moment. 
IIl put him on. 

There was the muflled sound of some- 
one speaking with his hand over the 
receiver and then I heard Cyphre's pol- 
hed accent purring on the oth 
So good of you to call, sir,” he 


I told him most of what I'd learned in 
Poughkeepsie, leaving our the death of 
Dr. Fowler. When I finished, 1 heard 
only heavy breathing on the other end. 

1 want you to find him," Cyphre said. 
“I don't care how long it takes or how 
much it costs, I want that man found." 

“That's a pretty tall order, Mr. Cyphre. 
Fifteen years is a long time. The trail is 
bound to be cold as ice. Your best bet 
would be the Missing Persons Burcau 

"No police. This is a private matter. I 
don't want a lot of nosy civil servants.” 
Cyphre's voice was acid with patrician 
scorn. 

“They've got the manpower for the 
job." Е said. "Favorite could be any- 
where in the country or abroad. I'm just 
one man on my own. 1 can't be expected 
to accomplish the same results as an 
organization with an international infor- 
ion network. 

The acid in Cyphre's voice grew more 
corrosive. "What it boils down to, Mr. 
Angel, is simply this: Do you want the 
job or not? If you are not interested, I 
will engage someone else.” 

"Oh, Em interested, all right, Mr. 
Cyphre, but it wouldn't be fair to you as 
my client if Т underestimated the diffi- 
culty of the project." Why did Cyphr 
make me feel like a child? 

“What I want you to do is get started 
right away, I'll leave the approach up to 
you. Do whatever you think best. The 
key to the whole operation, however, 
must remain discretion.” 

"I can be discreet as а 
when I try,” I said. 

"Em sure you can, Mr. 
ustructing my attorney to make 
out a check for five hundred doll: 
advance. 

I said that $500 would certainly 
care of things and we hung up. The urge 
to crack the office bottle for a self- 
ulatory toast was never stronger, 
king before lunch was bad lud 


father-confessor 


Tin 


I started by calling Walt Rigler, a re- 
porter I knew over at the Times. “What 
can you tell me about Johnny Favorite?” 
1 asked, after the prerequisite snappy 
patter. 

“Johnny Favorite? You must be kid- 
ding. Why don't you ask me the names 
of the other guys who sang with Bing 
Crosby in the Rhythm Boys? 

“Seriously, can you d 
on him?’ 
тп sure the morgue has a fil 
me five or ten minutes and ГЇЇ ha 
stuff ready for you.” 

“Thanks, budd 
on you.” 

He grunted goodbye and we hung up. 
I finished my cigar while sorting the 
morning mail, mostly bills and circulars, 
and closed up the office. The Times 
Building on 43rd Strect was just around 
the corner. I took the elevator to the 
newsroom on the third floor and gave 
Walt's name to the old man at the recep- 
tion desk. He appeared from the back in 
shirt sleeves with his necktie loosened, 
like a reporter in the movies. 

We shook hands and he led me into 
the newsroom, where a hundred type- 
writers filled the cigarette haze with their 
staccato rhythms, I followed him through 
the clatter to his desk in the middle of 
the room. A fat manila folder sat in the 
top wire basket of the desk tray. I picked 
it up and glanced at the yellowed clip- 
pings inside. “OK if Е hang on to some 
of this stuff?” I asked. 

"House rules say no. But I'm going 
out to lunch. Try not to lose anything 
and my conscience'll be clean." 

Most of the old clippings were not 
from the Times but from other New 
York dailies and a selection of national 
magazines, Favorite was ап abandoned 
child, A cop found him in a cardboard 
box with only his name and “June 2, 
1920," the date of his birth, pinned in a 


anything up 


Give 
thc 


T knew F could count 


note to his receiving blanket. He was 
raised in an orphanage in the Bronx and 
was on his own at 16, He was "discov- 


nd 
15-piece 


ered” by Spider Simpson in 1938 
soon was hcadlining with a 
orchestra. 

I sorted through the material, making 
a small pile of the stuff I wanted to keep. 
Two photos, one a studio glossy of Favor- 
ite in a tuxedo, his hair pomaded into 
а frozen black wave. The agent's name 
and address were rubber-stamped on the 
Ж: WARREN WAGNER, THEATRICAL REP- 
RESENTATIVE, 1619 BROADWAY (THE RRi 
BUILDING). WYNDHAM 9-3500. 

The other glossy showed the Spider 
Simpson orchestra in 1940. Johnny stood 
10 one side, with hands folded 1 
a choirboy. The names of all the sideme: 
were written in beside them on the print. 

1 borrowed three other items. The first 

(continued on page 188) 


WHEELS FOR THE 
MAN WHO THINKS BIG 


what with everything in detroit being down-sized, a guy is going to 
have to look elsewhere for transportation in the grand manner 


modern 
living 


By DONALD 
CHAIKIN 


ч 
Climb aboard a 10’-high Peterbilt cab-over- LAMBORGHINI mura? Here? In God's coun- 
engine ten-wheeler and you know you're king way. No self-respecting man of the 
of the road, At stop lights, lean out ond leer world, man of women, man with real hair 
at the serfs. Who's gonna argue? Price: $40,000. on his balls would call on a ladyfriend in that 


roller skate. 
Alfa Veloce Spiders, Porsche Targas, Ferrari GTs 
and Aston Martin DB-8s are all fine for teenagers, 
fine for cutting teeth on—nice playthings until a 
man has matured enough to take his rightful place 
PHOTOGRAPHY BY RICHARD IZUI in the world. When he has made it up the ladder 


Above: Heods will turn when you pull up to 
the party in your fire-engine-red, 25,000- 
pound American Lafronce pumper that can 
deliver up to 1500 gollons of your fovorite 
liquid refreshment per minute forced through 
a three-inch hose. The price is a bell ringer, 
too: $75,000. Opposite, top: Sixty-four thou- 
sand big ones will get you whot many feel 
is the ultimote road mochine—on Autocar 
dump truck thot's just right for getting your 
ashes houled. Or, if cement is your bog, 
there's always the Crane Corrier Company's 
U.S. Speciol model at right, with its sexy 
опе-топ cob. Many consider it the ultimote 
martini mixer for those who like them shok- 
en, not stirred. Only about $75,000. Cheap! 


big step upward and climb into the per- 
fect personal vehicle for today’s man. He 
should not aspire to an exotic foreign 
machine whose power will first be emas- 
culated by the Federal emission stand- 
ards and then castrated by the gasoline 
situation. No, he should look for a domes- 
tic name—such as Kenworth, or Diamond 
Reo, or White Freightliner or Peterbilt. 
The personal vehicle for today's man in 
today's world. 

How many of us, tooling along the free- 
way in a more mundane machine, have 

n blasted off the road by a tractor 
trailer tearing by with earthshaking fe- 
rocity? Think of how those same tractors 
would perform without the burden of a 
trailer—or two—in tow. A diesel tractor 
without the trailer—the ultimate driv- 
ing experience. Imagine the thrill testing 
your driving skill to the utmost, taking 
your Peterbilt along the Pacific Coast 


Highway or through the Vermont hills. 
Envision the superb handling, with ten 
wheels on the road, and the taut suspen- 
sion, including a front axle rated at 
12,000 pounds, all in that neat, short 
wheelbase. Imagine—18 forward gears 
and two reverses in that crisp Fuller 
gearbox. Why, you'd be able to teach 
Nuvolari a few things. 

Why settle for а small, finicky, dual- 
overhead-cam engine, with its moody 
Weber carburetors, when you can get a 
turbocharged Caterpillar diesel with a 
displacement of almost 1100 cubic inches, 
weighs only a bit more than 3000 pounds, 
puts out 450 horsepower and twists our 
more than 1350 foot-pounds of torque? 
Torque, as you know, is what makes 
things move—and it will move your 
15,000-pound Pete alcag fast enough to 
Set a ticket anyplace you take it. Of 
course, you may not want the Cat 
3408PTCA in your Pete; you may choose 
a Cummins engine, also turbocharged 
for more power and less noise from 
those gleaming, solidly crect exhaust 
pipes. Or you may opt for the newest, the 
Detroit Diesel 8V-92T. That's a V8 diesel 
e with each cylinder displac 
cubic inches to give you 130 horsepower 
and enough torque to blow your mind. 

As your selection of engines is myriad, 
so is your choice of practically everything 
else that goes into your custom-built 
Peterbilt. For you, along with Pete's 
gincers, decide which engine you want, 
what size, which slick-shifting gearbo: 
how many gears, whether you want two 
or three axles (the extra tolls are well 
worth it for that extra set of wheels), 
which drive ratios you'll be happiest with 
10 get the most satisfactory performance 
from the rest of the drive line—whether 
climbing the Rockies, cruising along the 
imterstates or tooling around town. And 
you'll find power steering worth it for 
parking downtown. Then you decide 
what appointments you want in that dis- 
tinctive, taut aluminum body, painted 
y one of Peterbil's more than three 
dozen color combinations or, if you pre- 
fcr, painted in a design of your own, in 
ny colors you choose, to personalize the 

vehicle and label it vov. In the interior 
of that cight-footwide cab, you'll find it 
well worth the extra $240 or so for an air- 
cushioned driver's scat, a seat that makes 
certain that the big steering. wheel will 
never get in your way, no matter what 
position you happen to find yourself in. 
And it should never get in your мау 
not with a $1040 airconditioned master 
bedroom right behind the seat. It is im- 
perative in this vehicle to have a twin- 
sized bed, with piped-in stereo music, 
climate controlled temperature and insu- 
ated, cushioned walls (a perfect place to 
hang your original Mucha poster). All 
this goes wherever you do to comfort you 
184 on those long nights out. 


PLAYBOY 


In addition to the driving excitement 
that comes with owning a big purple 
Pete is the just as real, and just as роже 
ful, static excitement, Therc you arc, sit- 
ting at a stop light, ten feet above the 
road with а maze of switches and gauges 
in front of you, around you and even 
above your head, gauges and controls for 
things that lesser men don't even. know 
exist, let alone are necessary for the better 
automotive life. Air pressure? Most men 
think that has to do only with tires. Front 
and rear driveline temperature? (What 
the hell is that?) Sitting at an 
tion on those threc-fooctall tires, wi 
of course, aluminum wheels, and feeling 
the power surging beneath уои] 
ally—since you are actually sitting on top 
of the engine, you can sec over the roofs 
of the other vehicles to calmly survey the 
traffic situation and, always, enjoy the 
view, while all the other drivers can see, 
in total frustration, is your chrome bump- 
er, level with their windshields. 

And so, as you and а ladyfriend roll 
off, long into the night, perhaps two 
states away, to catch The Maltese Falcon 
at a drive-in where you are certain to be 
the center of attraction, you know you 
won't have to worry about running out 
of gas, not with two chromed 100-gallon 
addle tanks full of cheaper, plentiful 
diesel fuel tucked under the cab. You 
know you won't have to ruin every Friday 
night waiting in line to fill up. No. you'll 
be out on the road enjoying life. And 
у to enjoy it, indeed. Watch- 
ing a movie through that distortion-free, 
fullcab-width, unique four-piece wind- 
shicld—no squinting and nobody's roof 
in your way—and you can even watch 
from bed. 

‘There is nothing to match this distinc- 
tive, luxurious and yet so sporty Peterbilt 
cab-over as the perfectly individualized 
personal vehicle for today’s man and his 
companion. You'll find it well worth its 
over 510,000 price and six-month wait to 
have it built just for you. But, alas, what 
do you do when there are more than just 
the two of you? The intimate tracto 
trailer will not suflice. Then you must 
tum to one of your other vehicles—say, 
your fire engine, 

What better way for the superb host to 
ake a group of friends for an old- 
med picnic than nand on—an 
п La France pumper? You can 


“not only carry all your friends, food and 


other picnic diversions but you can also 
carry and deliver all the liquid refresh- 
ment anyone could desire. Think of it: a 
beautiful Sunday in late August, а sunny 
and warm morning that promises to be 
not loo hot—w day for a picnic! 
‘The only drawback is that almost every- 
body else in town has the same idea and 
those who haven't are on their way to the 
beach. The roads are jammed past capac- 
You, however, will be a model of 


virtue in your single vehicle, conse 
gallons of fuel, and you will be rew 
for your unselfishness. You ca 
that traffic by riding right down the fire 
you have only to ring the bell 
i nd if your town has the 
Opticom emergency-traffic-control system, 
you won't even have to do that; you'll be 
able to change all your traffic 1 
green as vou approach them. You'll be 
out of tow nd out of traffic in no tim 
And if the unforeseen happened, you 
could have your picnic right therc on the 
truck. By removing the 1500 feet of hose, 
you would reveal more than enough 
room for a party. Of course, if you order 
a portable, light giving gasoline-powered 
generator and accompanying spotlights, 
you cam have that party well into the 
night. And when the picnic is over, no 
matter where you have it, Smokey the 
Bear will not have any complaint with 
the way you leave the arca, despite the 
size of the bonfire. 

In 1832, when John F. Rogers started 
his fire-extinguisher company in New 
York, he could not have imagined that 
almost 150 years later his company would. 
be turning out the epitome of elegant 
yet practical fun vehicles—the Ameri 
La France. The Century Series pumper, 
powered by the venerable Detroit Diesel 
six-cylinder diesel, offers such indispen- 


sable features as a stainless-steel 500- 
gallon booster tank that is warranteed 
for five years, in this day of evershorte 


ing and limited automotive warranties 
The cab and pumper sections of this 
truck are flex-jointed for improved road- 
ability and handling. And in the luxuri- 
ous cab, there direct heat to keep 
you warm and comfortable in the most 
adverse weather, as well as five separate 
seats, each one having a fine view of the 
road through optional clectric windows. 
Offered, of course, are optional armrests, 
along with your own gold-leaf decal de- 
sign j 1, you'll want 
the sh 


ned oversized lighted chrome. pump- 
gauge panel on the side of the truck 
panel that conveniently swings out of the 


way for servicing the double impeller 
pump, capable of delivering 1500 gallons 
of whatever liquid you may be serving, 


per minute, forcing it through three-inch 
hose, to make sure everyone gets his 
share. Of course, the diamond plate 
decks are all aluminum to end the peren 
nial painting problem. And the siren, air 
horns and bell are all chromed, so you 
won't worry about corrosion, no matter 
how wet it gets. 

And, wet or dry, your fire engine al- 
ways looks right. After all, how can it 
miss, with all that stainless steel and 

(concluded on page 270) 


DE 


ey 


CHIVAS REGAL + 12 YEARS OLDWORL Bi 
M 


í 


і = BLENDED SCO 


MANY HAPPY RETURNS 


Green textured cotton/royon shirt with spread button- It used to be that wing-collor shirts were worn only when you 
down collar ond barrel cuffs, by New Mon, $40, goes with stepped out in soup-and-fish. Here, wings have been added 
а loosely knotted narrow tie, from Barney's All-American fo a pinstripe shirt, from Pierre Cordin for Eagle Shirt- 
Sportswear, $8. Haven't we heord that song before? mokers, $25. Under them is tweed tie, from Resilio, $12.50. 


shirts with wing, round and buttondown collars worn 
with narrow ties? who said you can’t go home again? 


If you're the shy, retiring type, forget about this multi To round out your wardrobe, we suggest you try this vari- 
color windowpone-ploid cotton/polyester shirt featuring o oble-striped polished-cotton shirt that hos о small curved 
medium-spread collar and barrel cuffs, $18.50, that’s shown collar and barrel cuffs, by Hathaway, $28.50; warn with a 
with o silk tie, $18.50, bath from Chaps by Ralph lauren. casually knotted narrow silk tie, by Vicky Davis, about $9. 


PLAYBOY 


FALLING ANGEL 


(continued from page 180) 


“The receptionist had large breasts and slim hips. 
Her hair was on the brassy side of platinum.” 


was a photo from Life. It was taken at 
Dickie Wells's bar in Harlem and showed 
Johnny leaning against a baby grand, 
singing along with a Negro piano player 
named Edison “Toots” Sweet. There 
was a piece from Downbeat claiming the 
singer went out to Coney Island once а 
week whenever he was in town and had 
his palm read by a gypsy fortuneteller 
named Madam Zora. 

The Jast item was a squib in Walter 
Winchell's column dated 11/20/42 an- 
nouncing that Johnny Favorite was 
brcaking off his two-ycar engagement. to 
Margaret Krusemark, daughter of Etha 
Krusemark, the shipping millionaire. 

1 shufiled all of this stuff together, got 
a manila envelope out of the bottom 
drawer and stuffed it inside. Then, on a 
hunch, I dug out the glossy of Favorite 
and called the number in the Brill Build- 


i 
ing stamped on the back. 

"Warren Wagner Associates,” 
swered a perky female voice. 

I gave her my name and made an ap- 
pointment to see Mr. Wagner at noon, 

. 

The Brill Building was at 49th and 
Broadway. Walking up from 43rd, 1 
tried to remember how the square looked. 
the night I saw it for the first time. So 
much had changed. It was New Year's 
Eve of "43. An entire year of my life had 
vanished. I was fresh out of an Army 
hospital with a brand-new face and noth- 
ing but loose change in my pockets. 
Someone had lifted my wallet earlier in 
the evening, taking all I owned: driver's 
license, discharge papers, dog tags, the 
works. Caught up in the vast crowd and 
surrounded by the electric pyrotechnics 
jars, 1 felt my past slough- 
n. I had no 
ation, no money, no place to 
ind knew only that 1 was headi 
downtown. That was when J saw the 
lights in the Crossroads office and played 
a hunch that led me to Ernie Cavalero 
and a job I've never left. 

Outside the Brill Building, a tramp 
a tattered Army greatcoat pa 
and forth, muttering, 
bag,” to all who enter 
directory and located Warren V 
Associates, surrounded by dozens of song 
pluggers, prize-fight promoters and fly-by- 
night music publishers. A creaking ele- 
vator took me to the eighth floor. The 
ing when I opened 
‘ou Mr. Angel?” she 
asked, forming her words around a wad 


an- 


188 of gum. 


I said that I was and got a card out 
of my dummy wallet, It had my name 
on it but said I was a representative of 
the Occidental Life and. Casualty Corp. 
The receptionist pincered the card b 
tween fingernails as green and glossy as 
beetle wings. She had large breasts and 
slim hips and emphasized them with a 
pink angora sweater and a tight black 
skirt. Her hair was on the brassy side of 
platinum. "Mr. Wagner will see you 
right away," she said. 

I said thanks and went in. The inner 
office was half the size of the cubbyhole 
outside. A cigarette-scarred wooden d 
took up most of the floor space. Beh 
it, a young man in shirt sleeves was shav- 
ing with an electric razor. "Five min- 
utes,” he said, holding up his hand, palm 
outward so I could count his fingers, 

І sat my attaché case on the worn 
green rug and stared at the kid as he fin- 
ished shavi: He had curly, rust-colored 
hair and freckles. Beneath his horn- 
immed glasses, he couldn't have been 
much more than 24 or 25. 

“Mr. Wagner?” I asked when he 
switched off the razor. 


“Mr. Warren Wagner?” 

“That's right.” 

“Surely you're not the same man who 
was Johnny Favorite's agen 

“You're thinking about Dad. I'm War- 
ren, Junior 

“Then it’s your father I'd like to 
speak to.” 
е out of luck. He's been dead 


“What's this all about?" Warren 


leaned back in his leatherette chair and 
clasped, his hands behind his head. 
“Jonathan Liebling is named a bene- 


ficiary in a policy owned by one of ou 
customers. This office was given as his 
address, 

Warren Wagner, Jr., started to laugh. 
“That's terrific,” he snorted. “Really ter- 
тїйє. Johnny Favorite, the missing heir. 

"Quite frankly, I fail to sce the humor 
in all thi 

“Yeah? Well, lemme draw you a pic- 
ture. Johnny Favorite is flat on his back 
in a nut hatch. He's been а tumip for 
nearly twenty years.” 

y, that’s a wonderful joke. Know 
any other good ones?” 

"You don't understand," he said, 
taking oft his glasses and wiping his eyes. 
“Johnny Favorite was Dad's big score. 
He sank every penny he had in the world 


into buying his contract from Spider 
npson. Then, just as he was riding 
vorite got drafted. The Army 
sends а million-dollar property to North 
Africa and ships home a sack of potatoes.” 

I stood up. "Can you give me the name 
and address of the hospital where Favor- 
ite is a patien 

“Ask my secretary. She must have it 
tucked away someplace.” 

. 

I rode the Seventh Avenue IRT one 
stop to Times Square to save shoe leath- 
er. After struggling out of my overcoat, 
I sat down behind my desk and took a 
look at the photos and clippings I'd been 
lugging around. I stared at Johnny Fa- 
vorite’s smarmy smile until I could no 
longer stomach it, Where do you search 
for a guy who was never there to begin 
with? 

The Winchell column was as brittle 
with age as the Dead Sea Scrolls. I reread 
the item about the end of Favorite's en- 
gagement and dialed Walt Rigler’s num- 
ber over at the Times. 

"Lo, Walt,” I said. "It's me again. I 
need to know some stuff about Ethan 
Krusemark. 

“The big-shot shipownei 

“The very same. I'd like whatever 
you've got on him, plus his address. I'm 
especially interested in his daughter's 
broken engagement to Johnny Favorite 
ack in the early Forties.” 

Johnny Favorite again. He seems to 
be the man of the hour. 

"He's the star of the show. Сап you 
help me ou 

“TH check with the Woman's News," 
he said. “They cover society and all its 
dirty doings. Call you back in a couple 
minutes. 


са Local 
ion of Mu- 
sicians. After a bit of searching, they were 
able to provide me with Cornelius “Spi- 
der" Simpson's address and phone num- 
ber in Los Angeles. All they had on 
Edison Sweet was his nts number, but 
I was in luck. Toots was currently play- 
ing uptown at the Red Rooster on 138th 
Street. Next, I tied Spider Simpson in 
L.A. but connected with the maid. She 
Mexican. I managed to leave my 
name and office number, along with the 
general impression that it was а matter 
of importance. 

I hung up and 
before I lifted my hand. It was 
Rigler. "Here's the poop," he said. 
Krusemark's very top-drawer char- 
ity balls, social register, all that sort of 
thing. Has an office in the Chrysler 
Building. His residence is number two 
Sutton Place; phone numbers in the 
book. You got that?” 

І said it was all down in black and 
white, and he went on. “OK. Krusemark 
wasn't always so upper crust. He worked 


After Walt hung up, I di 


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Walt 


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PLAYBOY 


as а merchant seaman in the early Twen- 
ties and it's rumored he made his first 
money smuggling bootleg hootch. He 
started putting his own fleet together 
during the Depression, all Panama regis- 
try, of course." 

"What about his daughter?" I asked. 

"Margaret Krusemark; born 1922; fa- 
ther and mother divorced in 1926. The 
mother committed suicide later that same 
year. Margaret met Favorite at a col- 
lege prom. He was singing with the 
band. Their engagement was the society 
scandal of 1941. Seems that he was the 
one who broke things off, though no one 
knows why anymore. The girl was gen- 
erally regarded as something of a crack- 
pot, so maybe that was the reason.” 

"What sort of crackpot?" 

“The kind with visions. She used to 
tell fortunes at parties, People thought it 
was cute for a while, but it got too rich 
for their blue blood when she started 
casting spells.” 

“Is this on the level?” 

"Absolutely. She was known as the 
Witch of Wellesley.” 

“Where is she now?” 

“No one I talked to seemed to know. 
Society editor says she doesn't live with 
her father and she’s not the type who 
gets invited to the Peacock Ball at the 
Waldorf, so we haven't got anything on 
her over here. The last mention she got 
in the Times was on her departure for 
Europe ten years ago. She may still be 
there.” 

"Walt, you've been a big help. I'd start 
reading the Times if they ran comic 
strips." 

I got the phone book out of the desk 
and ran my finger down a page in the 
K section. There was a listing for a 
Krusemark, Ethan, and a Krusemark 
Maritime, Inc, as well as а Krusemark, 
M., Astrological Consultations. This one 
seemed worth a try. The address was 881 
Seventh Avenue. I dialed the number 
and let it ring. A woman answered. 

"I got your name through a friend,” I 
said. "Personally, 1 don't put much stock 
in the stars, but my fiancée is a true be- 
liever. I thought I'd surprise her and 
have both our horoscopes done." 

“My desk calendar is completely clean 
for the afternoon," she said, "so whatever 
is convenient for you." 

"How about right away? Say in half an 
hour?” 

“That would be wonderful.” 

I gave her my name. She thought my 
name was wonderful, too, and told me 
her apartment was in Carnegie Hall. I 
said I knew where to find it and hung 


up. 


. 
I took the uptown BMT to 57th Street 
and climbed the exit stairs that let me 


190 Out on the comer by the Nedick’s near 


Carnegie Hall. A bum shuffled up and 
tapped me for a dime as I headed for the 
studio entrance. 

The lobby of the Carnegie Hall Stu- 
dios was small and barren of decoration. 
I got in the elevator and gave M. Kruse- 
mark's name to an ancient operator who 
resembled a Balkan army pensioner in 
his ill-fitting uniform. He looked at my 
shoes and said nothing. After a moment, 
he shoved the metal gate closed and we 
started up. 

M. Krusemark's name was painted on 
her door in gold letters and, beneath it, 
an odd symbol that looked like the letter 
M with an upturned arrow as a tail. I 
rang the bell and waited. High-heeled 
footsteps tapped on the floor. 

"Yes?" asked a voice inside. 

m Harry Angel" I said. "I called 
earlier about an appointment." 

"Why, of course. Just a minute, 
please." I heard the chain sliding free 
and the door opened. "Do come in," 
she said, standing aside for mc to enter. 

She was dressed all in black, like a 
weekend bohemian in a Village coffee- 
house. Her catgreen eyes burned at me 
from out of a pale, angular face. Walt 
Rigler had indicated she was about 36 
or 37 years old, but without any make- 
up, she looked much older. Her only 
ornament was a gold medallion hanging 
from her neck on a simple chain. It was 
an upside-down five-pointed star. 

Neither of us said a word and I found 
myself staring at the dangling medallion. 
A five-pointed star was engraved on the 
ring that Dr. Albert Fowler was no long- 
er wearing when I found his body locked 
in the upstairs bedroom. Here was the 
missing piece in the puzzle. 

The revelation hit me like an ice-water 
enema, raising the hackles along the back 
of my neck. What had happened to the 
doctor's ring? It might have been in his 
pocket; I didn't go through his cloth. 
but why would he take it off before blow- 
ing his brains out? And if he didn't re- 
move it, who did? 

I felt the woman's fox-fire eyes focused 
on me. "You must be Miss Krusemark," I 
said to break the silence. 

1 am," she answered without smiling. 
I saw your name on the door but 
didn't recognize the symbol." 

"My sign." she said, closing and relock- 
ing the door. “I'm a Scorpio.” She stared 
at me for a long moment, as if my eyes 
were peepholes revealing some interior 
scene. "And you?" 

“Me?” 

"What's your sign?" 

“I don't really know," I sa 
Ey's not one of my strong points. 

“When were you born?” 

“June second, 1920." 1 gave her John- 
ny Favorite's birth date just to try her 
out, and for a split second I thought 1 


caught a faraway flicker in her intense, 
emotionless stare. 

“Gemini,” she said. “The twins. Curi- 
ous; I once knew a boy born the very 
same day." 

"Really? Who was that?" 

"It doesn't matter," she said. "It was 
a long, long time ago. How rude of me 
to keep you standing here in the hall. 
Please come in and have a seat." 

I followed her out of the murky hall 
into a spacious, high-ceilinged studio liv- 
ing room. There were ferns of all de- 
scriptions and palms towering to the 
ceiling. Greenery dangled from hanging 
planters. Miniature rain forests steamed 
within enclosed glass terrariums. 

“Beautiful room,” I said, as she took 
my overcoat and folded it over the back 
of a couch. 

“Yes, it's wonderful, isn't it? I've been 
very happy here.” She was interrupted by 
a sharp whistling in the distance. "Would 
you like some tea?" she asked. "I just put 
the kettle on when you arrived.” 

“Only if it's no troubli 

"No trouble at all. The water's al- 
ready boiling.” She gave me a wan half- 
smile and hurried off to deal with the 
insistent whistling. I took a closer look 
around. 

Exotic knickknacks crowded every 
available surface. Temple flutes and 
prayer wheels, Hopi fetishes and papier- 
máché avatars of Vishnu ascending out 
of the mouths of fishes and turtles. An 
obsidian Aztec dagger carved in the 
shape of a bird glittered on a bookshelf. 
I scanned the haphazard volumes and 
spotted the I Ching, a copy of Oaspe 
and several of the Evan-Wentz Tibetan 
series. 

When M. Krusemark returned carry- 
ing a silver tray and tea set, I was stand- 
ing by a window thinking about Dr. 
Fowlers missing ring. She placed the 
service on a low table. 

I joined her on the couch. “That’s a 
familiar face." I nodded at an oil por- 
trait of an aging pirate in a tuxedo. 

“My father, Ethan Krusemark.” Tea 
swirled into translucent china cups. 

"There was the hint of a roguish smile 
on the determined lips, a glint of ruth- 
lessness and cun eyes as green as 
his daughters. "He's the shipbuilder, 
isn't he? I've seen his picture in Forbes." 

"He hated the painting. Said it was 
like having a mirror that got stuck. 
Cream or lemon?" 

“TI take it straight, thanks.” 

She handed me the cup. “It was done 
last year. I think it's a wonderful like- 
ness. Would you believe he's over sixty? 
He always looked ten years younger than 
his age. His sun is in trine with Jupiter, 
a very favorable aspect.” 

I let the mumbo jumbo pass and said 
that he looked like a swashbuckling 


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PLAYBOY 


captain in the pirate movies I'd scen as a 
kid. 

“Very true. When I was in college, all 
the girls in the dorm thought he was 
Clark Gable." 

I sipped my tea. It tasted like ferment- 
ing peaches. "My brother knew a girl 
named Krusemark when he was at 
Princeton," I said. "She went to Welles- 
ley and told him his fortune at a prom." 
“That would have been my sister, Mar- 
" she said. "I'm Millicent. We're 
. She's the black witch in the fam- 
ily; I'm the white one." 

1 felt like a man waking from a dream 
of riches, his golden treasure melting 
like mist between his fingers. "Does your 
sister live here in New York?" I asked, 
keeping up the banter. I already knew 
the answer. 

“God, no. Maggie moved to Paris over 
ten years ago. Haven't seen her in an 
age. What's your brother's name?” 

The entire charade hung limply over 
me like the skin of a deflated balloon. 
“Jack,” I said. 

“I don't remember Maggie ever men- 
tioning a Jack. Of course, there were so 
many young men in her life in those 
days. I need for you to answer some ques- 
tions." She reached for a leather pad-and- 
pencil set on the table. "So I can do 
your chart." 

“Fire away.” 

"You were born on June second, 
1920," she said. "There's quite a bit I 
know about you from that fact alone." 

“Tell me all about myself.” 

Millicent Krusemark fixed me with her 
feline stare. “I know that you're a natural 
actor," she said. "Playing roles comes 
easily. Although you are deeply con- 
cerned with discovering the truth, lies 
flow from your lips without hesitation, 

"Pretty good. Go on. 

"Cruelty comes easily to you, yet you 
find it inconceivable that you are so 
gifted at hurting others. On one hand, 
you are methodical and tenacious, but 
by contrast, you place great stock in in- 
tuition.” She smiled. "When it comes to 
women, you prefer them young and 
dark.” 

“A-plus,” 1 said. “You were right on 
the money.” And she was. She had it 
down pat. Only one problem: wrong 
birthday; she was telling my fortune with 
Johnny Favorite's vital statistics. “Бо you 
know where 1 can meet some dark young 
women?" 

"ГИ be able to tell a great deal more 
once I have what I need." The white 
witch scribbled on her note pad. “I can't 
guarantee the girl of your dreams, but I 
can be more specific. Here, I'm jotting 
down star positions for your chart. Not 
yours, really, that boy I mentioned. 
Your horoscopes are undoubtedly simi- 


Millicent Krusemark frowned, study- 
ing her notes. “This is a period of great 
danger. You have been involved in a 
death quite recently, within a week at 
least. The medical profession is involved. 
Unfavorable aspects are very strong. Be- 
ware of strangers.” 

I stared at this odd woman in black 
ible fear tentacles encircle 
my heart. How did she know so much? 
з that ornament around your 


“This?” The woman's hand paused at 
her throat like a bird resting in flight. 
“Just a pentacle. Brings good luck. 

Dr. Fowler's pentacle didn't bring him 
much luck, but then, he wasn't wearing 
it when he did someone take the 
ring after killing the old man? 

“I need additional information," Milli- 
cent Krusemark said, her filigreed gold 
pencil poised like a dart. "When and 
where was your fiancée born? I need to 
determine longitude and latitude." 

I ad-libbed some phony dates and 
places and made the ritual gesture of 
glancing at my wrist watch before plac- 
ing my cup on the table. We rose to- 
gether, as if on a lift. “Thanks for the 
tea.” 


. 

I dug out a cigarette on the way down 
in the elevator and lit it as soon as I 
hit the street. The March wind felt 
cleansing. I walked slowly down Sev- 
enth. trying to make sense out of the 
nameless fear that had seized me back 
in the astrologer's bosky apartment. I 
knew it had to be a con, verbal sleight 
of hand, like encyclopedia salesmanship. 
“Beware of strangers.” That was the sort 
of bullshit you got for a penny along 
with your weight. She had suckered me 
with her oracle’s voice and hypnotic eyes. 

I took the rest of the afternoon off, 
relaxing at a double fcatirc, and then 
headed to Gallagher's and the best 
steak in town. I finished my cigar and 
second cup of coffee about nine, paid 
my check and caught a cab on Broad- 
way for the eight blocks down to my 
garage. It was time to go uptown and 
hear some music. 

Crossing 125th Street, everything was 
bright as Broadway. Farther along, 
Small's Paradise and Count Basie's place 
seemed alive and well. I found a park- 
ing spot across Seventh Avenue from the 
Red Rooster and crossed on the green. 

The Red Rooster was plush and dark. 
"The tables around the bandstand were 
crowded with uptown celebrities, big 
spenders with their bare-armed ladies 
glittering beside them in a rainbow dis- 
play of sequined, strapless evening 
gowns. 

I found a stool at the bar and ordered 
a snifter of Remy Martin. Edison Sweet's 
trio was on deck, but from where I 
was sitting, I saw only the piano player's 


back as he hunched over the keyboard. 
Bass and electric guitar were the other 
instruments. 

The band was playing a blues, the gui- 
tar darting in and out of the melody like 
a hummingbird. The piano throbbed 
and thundered. Above the moody, shift- 
ing bass rhythms, Toots traced an intri- 
cate lament, and when he sang, his voice 
was bittersweet with suffering: 


“I got them voodoo blues, 

Them evil hoo-doo blues. 

Petro Loa won't leave me alone; 

Every night I hear the zombies 
moan. 

Lord, I got them mean ol’ voodoo 
blues.” 


When the set ended, I told the bar- 
tender I wanted to buy the group a 
drink. He filled their orders and nodded 
in my direction. 

The two sidemen picked up their 
drinks, shot me a glance and moved off 
into the crowd. Toots Sweet took a stool 
at the end of the bar. I collected my 
glass and made my way over to him. 

“Just wanted to say thanks," I said, 
climbing onto the next stool. "You're an 
artist, Mr. Sweet." 

“Call me Toots, son. I don't bite.” 

“Toots it is, then.” 

Toots Sweet had a face as broad and 
dark and wrinkled as a slab of cured 
tobacco. His thick hair was the color of 
cigar ash. He filled a shiny blue-serge 
suit to the bursting point, yet the feet 
encased in two-tone black-and-white 
pumps were as small and delicate as a 
woman's. 

“I liked the blues you played at the 
end," I said. 

“Wrote that one day in Houston, years 
ago, on the back of a cocktail napkin. 
He laughed. The sudden whiteness of 
his smile sj his dark face like the end 
of a lunar eclipse. One of his front teeth 
was capped in gold. The white enamel 
underneath gleamed through a cutout 
shaped like an inverted five-pointed star. 
It was something you noticed right away. 
“That your home town?” 

Houston? Lord, no, I was just visit- 
wr 

"Where're you from?” 

“Me? Why, I'm a New Orleans boy, 
born and bred. You're lookin’ at an am- 
fropologist's dee-light. I played in Story- 
ville cribhouses "fore I was fo-teen. I 
knew all that gang, Bunk and Jelly and 
Satchelmouth. I went up ‘de ribber' to 
Chicago. Haw, haw, haw.” Toots roared 
and slapped his big knees. The rings on 
his stubby fingers Mashed in the dim 
ight. 

“You're putting me on,” I said. 

“Maybe just a little bit, son. Maybe 
just a little bit.” 


(continued on page 246) 


Hungarian-born Stephen Vizinczey's novel 
In Praise of Older Women, which sold some 
3,000,000 copies world-wide, is o sexual 
odyssey involving over a dozen women. The 
movie version can handle only seven, the 
last of whom is Helen Shaver (at right), 
playing newly liberated housewife whom 
Andras, the film’s protagonist, meets in 
1959 after having emigrated from 
Hungary to Canada, where he has become 
а philosophy professor—not to mention a 
highly accomplished seducer. 


OBSERVING 
"OLDER 
WOMEN" 


from canada, a country 

that usually exports hockey 
players, comes a new film 
that promises a very lovely — 
and very warm—aulumn 


Tom Berenger, Hollywood's new golden 
boy, plays Andras—who begins his career 
аз о womanizer under the tutelage of a 
knowledgeable lover, Mayo—played by 
Karen Black (center right). That all happens 
during Andras’ student days in pre- 
revolutionary Budapest; some years later, 
Andras meets a frigid French journalist, 
Alexandra Stewart (right), with whom he 
gaes from tubbery to toe kissing. Berenger's 
most recent role was as Diane Keaton's 
murderer in Looking for Mr. Goodbor. 


193 


copropucer Robert Lantos and 
director George Kaczender hope that 
their film, In Praise of Older Women, 
alter its September world premiere 

in Toronto, will be the break-through 
work that finally puts Canadian 
movies on the map—with a boost 
from its magnetic male star, Tom 


Top: Shover (in Berenger’s embrace) is 
anly 27—but manages to be convincing 
in her role as a once-shy matran turned 
seasoned swinger. “Helen and Tam hit it 
off at once,” says directar George 
Kaczender. “She did a dynamite screen 
test—it was absolutely electrifying.” 


194 


Berenger. “For too many people,” 
Lantos observes, “Canadianism is 
identified with boredom.” Older 
Women boasts a number of realistic 
love scenes, but Lantos feels he won't 
have censorship problems—except 
maybe in Ontario. “After all, Pretty 
Baby was banned there.” 


French film buffs know Canadian-born 
Alexandra Stewart (phatographed at right 
exclusively for PLAYBOY) as a gifted, aris- 
tocratic beauty wha appeared in Francois 
Truffaut's Doy for Night and was once 
directar Louis Malle's lady. Above, she's 
abed with the seemingly tireless Andros. 


PLAYBOY 


196 


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KINCS 


(continued from page 160) 


*In South Philadelphia, 
homosexuality means 
drag queens." 


ushered into a room where perhaps a 
dozen reporters wait at the ready. Gold- 
en solemnly nods at the group and places 
himselt behind a desk. A potted poinset- 
tia droops directly over his head. He 
looks like a bruised angel with a scarlet 
halo. 

A fellow officer begins the conference 
by passing photographs of the three sus- 
pects to each of the newsmen, “Just a 
few minutes ago," Golden says, "we ob- 
tained warrants charging each of these 
persons with murder, three counts of 
robbery, attempted murder, aggravated 
assault and criminal conspiracy. The 
warrants are based on evidence obtained 
during the police investigation.” Golden 
describes each of the suspects, His infor- 
mation is sparse: 

Felix Melendez, aged 20, 5'9”, 135 
pounds, slender build, green eyes, 
shoulder-length hair, light complexion, 
birthmark on the outer right thigh and 
scar on abdomen. 

Salvatore Soli, aged 37, 5'4", 128 
pounds, slender build, brown cycs, dark 
brown hair, mustache, dark complexion, 
track marks on both arms, tattoos on 
right forearm of two hearts and a dove 
and the words мом AND DAD. Tattoos on 
the left upper arm of a cross, a heart 
and a rose. 

Steven Maleno, aged 25, 5'9”, slender, 
muscular, dark hair, olive complexion, 
track marks, married. 

Golden maintains that robbery was the 
motive in the case, He doesn't comment 
on whether or not the men are involved 
in drug traffic or had homosexual in- 
volvements. Nor does he talk about a 
relationship between any of the men and 
Knight. “All three are dangerous,” he 
admits. "All three come from South 
Philadelphia.” 

Even with my fragmentary knowledge 
of the city, that last reference to South 
Philly says something about the sus- 
pects. Mayor Rizzo hails from South 
Philly. He's the former cop, the big hero 
and the idol of the community, the local 
boy who made good. They love it when 
he returns in a limousine and waves to 
them. Family honor is big there, too. 
People protect their relatives. Call some- 
one's sister a whore and you'll find your 
head bashed in. No big deal is made of 
the Mafia. It supports the community. 
Better the Mafia than the liberal politi- 
cians is the feeling. 

Homosexuality in South Philadelphia 


means drag queens. They're spottable. 
‘They wear their gayness on the outside 
and they're accepted as freaks of na- 
ture. The toughs protect them. They 
banter with them, “Hey, sweetie, who's 
your date for tonight? Wanna give me a 
blow job? 

"It's not big enough, honey, I want a 
real man.” 

A man who is homosexual but dresses 
ike everyone else and. passes is a threat 
If a member of a South Philadelphi: 
gang is suddenly discovered hanging out 
with a homosexual for reasons other than 
hustling, procuring or beating the d 
lights out of him, his contemporaries 
most likely rough him up and banish 
him forever from the paternal breast. 
Naturally, the h doesn't like fairies. 

"hey're an abomination. It's right there 
in the Bible. Check Leviticus. In South 
machismo is all 
105 been a long day. It is as 
if Provincetown has never happened. 1 
return to the Warwick and sleep. 

. 

The murder had taken place Sunday 
morning. December 7, 1975. The evening 
had started innocently enough with a 
dinner party at La Trufle, which Knight 
himself had hosted. His guests were Mr. 
amd Mrs. Janensch and Dr. and Mr 
John McKinnon. 

If there was a purpose to the occasion, 
it was to celebrate the McKinnons’ visit 
to Philadelphia. McKinnon and Knight 
had been roommates at Harvard in the 
lue Sixties and had kept in touch 
through the years, In fact, Kni 
best man at the McKinnons wedding. 
but the McKinnons had пог visited 
Knight since he moved to Philadelphia 
iore than a year before. They had 
planned to stay the weekend as his house 
guests, то be show nd the city by 
him, to generally have a whiz-bang time. 

Earlier that day, they had checked into 
Knight’s apartment, rested, seen a bit of 
the town, had a couple of cocktails, then 
mbled off to La Trulfe. Dinner con- 
sisted of four pheasants, which Knight 
had shot in South Dakota a couple of 
months before and which the restaurant 
had prepared especially for him and his 
guests. 

As usual, there was plenty to drink, 
and Knight played the debonair host as 
he suggested the best Scotch before din- 
ner, rare сз with cach course and 
cordials to. climax the gourmet meal 
Conversation was light, sometimes spar 
kling: no one got drunk; giddy, perhaps, 
but in full control. 

At 12:20 AL, the Janensches said good 
night, leaving Knight and the McKin- 
nons free to return to his apartment 

Once home, Dr. McKinnon and 
Knight drank brandy and remi 
about the old days—and Rosemar 
Kinnon dozed off on her husband's lap. 


nt was 


а 


Shortly after one А.м. the phone rang. 
Knight answered, spoke to the caller 
softly but with more than a hint of an- 
noyance in his voice. The doctor over- 
heard part of the conversation, He heard 
Knight say, “I can't see you tonight. I've 
got house guests. 

When Knight hung up the phone, he 
explained casually to McKinnon that 
the call was from a procurer who set him 
up with girls, It was an explanation that 
needn't have been made, and опе that 
embar her proper doctor- 

About three AM., the phone r 
again 


ng 
ight was more abrupt with the 
caller this time. After hanging up, he 
suggested that the McKinnons retire to 
the guest room. 

McKinnon speculated that Knight 
might be having a girl come by. He and 
his wife bade their chum good night— 
both men were quite smashed by then— 
and shuffled off to bed. 

At four axu, the doorbell rang. 
answered: It was the phone 
Knight explained he couldn't let him in, 
but the caller made a ruckus in the hall- 
way, pleading. “I love you, John. T must 
see you. 

Eventually, Knight opened the door. 

‘The man pushed past him, The man was 
Felix Melendez, accompanied by Steven 
Maleno and Salvatore Soli. 
They forced Knight to his bedroom 
en with his paunch, Knight was 
strong as an ox and didn't give in easily. 
Sull. he was tipsy. His targets were not 
easily discernible. They overpowered 
him. One of them knocked h head 
against a Ming vase. Once he was down, 
they used belts and ropes and socks to 
his legs together and bind his 
behind his back. They gagged his mouth 
with his best silk neckties. 

Then they ransacked the apartment. 
In the guest room, they discovered the 
McKinnons. Rosemary McKinnon w 
ordered naked from the bed. The doctor 
was unbudgeable. Too many drinks—he 
was out I ht. The men did not 
force him to awaken. Instead, Soli made 
Mrs. McKinnon walk through the apart- 
ment. open desk di 
in the search for valuables, She remem- 
bers that Soli had a hand gun and that 
ndez roamed the apartment with a 
poon gun and a scuba-diving knil 
When she and Soli reached Knights bed- 
w her host lying face down 
the corner. He was not moving. 

Ninety minutes into the chaos, the 
doorbell rang. It was the Dorchester's 
night attendant, who had come to report 
that a neighbor was complaining that 
she couldn't sleep due to the noise. 
Melendez told the attendant that he was 
Knights brother-in-law and that the two 
were practicing karate. The attendant 

(continued on page 221) 


iwers and assist him. 


MENS COLOGNE 


Monsieur 
Houbigant 


Ade mounted AUS TORY 


Ногепсе—по, not that Florence; Florence, Italy—in the 15th Century. 


Get reddy. 


Savonarola tried to set 
the Renaissance back at least half an hour. 


Bex Kids! You gone do PATY 


Бъ xou gone loge all you & 


198 


RENAISSANCE ALL-STARS IN ACTION 
Galileo 


fas attention! I’m trying to prove that different weights 
Sall at the-same rate of speed. When yell" ЕТ GO! 200 let go, too! 


Sure! Т point vi 


5 


1o call it 
the vibrator . 
/ X 


р 


199 


200 


Johann Gutenberg Royal Personages 


At \ast!..MOOFABLE TY Again? ButKing you've scored 
"Maggie und Chiggs for thrice tonight already ^ 
A Thats not the half of it. Queen! 
@ Why а you think thes call me, 
Henry the EIGHTH? ^ 


ce 
V) 
PA 


| Holy Smoke! 
The heavens 
descend! 


[| Anyway whatdid you 
expect? [t's only 


the first coat! 


| F Don't get "EDS 


EVERY DAY IN THE EVERYDAY LIFE OF AN EVERYDAY RENAISSANCE MAN 
Theology & Philosophy 


Intellectual Curi 
В 
М 


бес DEFENSES а. 


The world..she's round like this 
She's not flat like you, Queenie! 
У "A ned 


The desire 

for exploration 

and discovery 
comes to Columbus. 


To be continued. 


THE SEAGRAMSS GIN 
MIDNIGHT MARTINI. 


ھر 


LAE 


ر 


| Add a black olive to your martini made 
| with Seagram's Extra Dry Gin, the real 
secret behind the perfect martini. 


‘SEAGRAM DISTILLERS CO., N.Y.C. BO PROOF. DISTILLED ORY GIN. DISTILLED FROM GRAIN. 


TIPS ON KEEPING YOUR LIFESTYLE IN HIGH GEAR 


MAN 
© 
WORK 


HOW 1 GOT MY RAISE 


The ill effects of inflation have prompted us to poll 
some of cur better-heeled colleagues in hopes of picking 
up а few pointers on plumping up the pay check. Herc- 
with the results: 

Good, hard work, we discovered, is one of the roughest 
routes to higher wages. It seems that unless you've got a 
union to beat brows for you, or you work for a company 
with mandated salaryreview periods, the Horatio Alger 
road to riches can be bumpy, indecd. Perseverance and 
loyalty are fine for keeping your job, but they seldom 
seem to inspire much in the way of outpourings of cash. 

Poverty pleas turned out to be effective for some, dis- 
astrous for others. The typical poor-boy ploys—ostenta- 
tious cating of brown-bag lunches at the desk, wearing 
the same seedy suit day after day, elaborate litanies to 
the boss of marriage plans (if single), baby plans (if mar- 
ried) and alimony payments (if divorced)—sometimes 
backfire. Those who did best with the peanut-butter-and- 
jelly displays tended to be the younger, fair-haired fel- 
lows. "When I sce a kid who looks like he's hurting,” 
one calculating employer confided, “my temptation is to 
give him enough of a raise to shape up. But when an 
older guy starts coming in looking like Columbo, all 1 
really want to do is can the bum.” 

Threats to quit appeared to be far and away the most 
effective way of loosening the pay-check purse strings. 
But there's a catch: No one likes to be bullied, and em- 
ployces who went to their bosses with inflexible up-or-out 
ultimatums found themselves out as often as up. Worse, 
some had the gruesome experience of getting the raise 
they demanded only to find a pink slip in with their 
heavy new salary check а few months later. Their bosses 
taken their direct demand for higher pay as a cue 
to start searching for a replacement. 

The lesson, then, an cither-or scenario. Most 
important, don't give your boss a problem, give him a 
solution. Try to assume that he really wants to give you 
more money and suggest ways he can do so without 
causing more waves than he can handle. For example, if 
there is a moratorium on wage increases in your com- 
pany, suggest, instead, that he give you a merit bonus, 
that he increase your expense allowance, that he give you 
an extra three меске paid vacation. 

If that doesn’t work, play on your employers separa- 
tion anxicty with subtle suggestions of impending de- 
parture: sudden sartorial splendor coupled with slightly 
prolonged lunch hours, frequent “dentist appointments." 
Anything that hints of job interviews will do. One boss 
told us that nothing can start him negotiating faster than. 


the sight of a bald employee suddenly sporting a rug or 
a bearded bohemian type parading around the office 
spruced up like a Moonie оп а mission, 

How did you get your raise? If you have a great story 
about your success, write it down concisely and mail it 
to Man & Work, eLAvpov, 747 Third Avenue, New York, 
New York 10017. 


OFFICE FREEBIES 


Ever use the company phone to place a cross-country 
call to that sizzling stewie from last week's flight? Ever 
photocopy your résumé at company expense? Your novel? 
It probably doesn’t strike you as stealing, exactly, but you 
know it’s not the sort of conduct they award merit badges 
Гог, either. And it sure adds up. The American Manage: 
ment Associations, which try to keep track of people who 
give business the business, estimate that the recent an- 
nual cost of pilfering in this country was between nine 
billion and 14 billion dollars—quite a pile of paper clips 
out the door. 

The fact is that times have changed and, with them, 
peoples definition of a rip-off. “Today it you say to 
someone, "You're stealing," remarks A.M.A. president 
James Hayes, "you're liable to get the reply, ‘Oh, no, this 
is adjusted compensation.’ In other words, ] don't 
enough money, therefore I have to take things to equa 
what 1 think I'm worth.” 

But feclings of overexploitation and undercompensa- 
tion are only part of the problem, Apparently, workers 
can get the itch to snitch whenever ethical standards in 
the community or corporation are low. Susan Costello, 
who coordinates the A.M.A^s Crimes Against Business 
project, believes that the moral climate of a company 
comes from the top. If the bigwigs are putting their 
ling daughters’ Sweet 16 bashes on the expense ac- 
count and jetting off for weekends in Puerto Vallarta on 
the company plane, the underlings somehow lose their 
qualms about stuffing the old briefcase with a stapler. 

So where does management draw the line between 
friendly freebies and outright larceny? “I don’t think 
business really worries too much about paper clips and 
pencils,” Costello concedes, The general rule of thumb 
seems to be that your boss isn’t going to miss a few of the 
things that come into the office supply room in gross 
amounts, A couple of manila folders, some Scotch tape 
and so forth aren't likely to set off an internal audit, 
whereas a missing electric pencil sharpener might. How- 
ever, some compa are more strict than others, and 
you just might be putting your job on the line for a 
couple of ballpoints. 


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(01078 R J REYNOLOS TOBACCO CO 


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troducing 
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TIPS ON KEEPING YOUR LIFESTYLE IN HIGH GEAR 


THE GOOD LIFE 
DOWN 
JAMAICA WAY 


omctime back in the forgotten Sixties, it was de 
S creed that Americans should no longer travel to 

Jamaica, especially if they were white. La revolu- 
cian had come to the black Caribbean and you can bet 
your blue eyes you weren't wanted. 

Well. the whole fracas was probably exaggerated in the 
first place; we know it’s a chimera now. 1, being white, 
went to Jamaica recently and felt а 1о more comfortable 
than on a few American streets I could name. My lady 
und I were wiped out by the scenery, the water and the 
prices: Jamaica represents the best tropical geta 
the world within a modest American budget. Why һа 
someone told us sooner? 


PARADISE REVISITED 


Of the Greater Antilles, or largest islands of the 
Caribbean, Jamaica clearly has the most to offer. (The 
Lesser Antilles are splendid, but air fares to the far islands 
much higher.) Hispaniola—Haiti and the Domini 
Republic—have true decadent appeal, but the grinding 
poverty there can ruin your vacation. Cuba is nice for 
ustere comrades; a PLAYBOY editor visiting the place last. 
winter reported only one warm shower in four s. The 
U. S. Virgin Islands are a long jump from Miami (about 
$180 round trip), full of Americans and rather overcom- 
mercialized, unless you can afford the expensive serenity 
of the Caneel Bay Plantation on St. John’s at $75 per 
person per day 

Jamaica is a short hop over Cuba ($112 round trip from 
Miami), blessed with blue-tinged mountains, lush rain. 
forests, coffee plantations, flat beaches, picture-postcard 
bays, deep diving grottocs, coral cliffs, near perfect year- 
round weather and the historical remnants of a colonial 
lifestyle. It is so uncrowded that you can create a private 
beach every few hundred yards by tooling around the un- 
dulating coast line in a rented car (about $130 per week) 
or on a Honda 360 (only $80 per week, but not for the 
fainthearted). And, unless you get into the deepest bush 
where they speak only a semi-English patois, there is 
no language barrier. 


ON THE BEACH 

For $310 per week, you cam have a private villa 
overlooking a hillside golf course on what is called the 
Ironshore Plantation (once covered with sugar cane) just 
outside Montego Bay. Our villa included a private 36-foot 
swimming pool on a pa lı a panoramic Caribbean 
view, four bedrooms (with private bith) opening onto 
the pool deck and a large living/dining 100m with rotat- 
ing fans hanging from a cathedral ceiling. The kitchen 


came staffed with a cook/maid, but we had to buy 
groceries from a small, high-priced store. Also included 
in the fee was Sylvester. a young Jamaican with a gleam- 
ng smile, who was live-in watchman, gardener and house 
philosopher. We tipped the staff $20 cach at weck's end. 
(Incidentally, $310 is the minimum villa fec for two bed- 
rooms—we could have had two more people, at no extra 
cost, but we were there to get away from the crowds.) 

Our only other company was the occasional bra 
donkey and foraging goats passing on a tril nearby. Our 
balustraded patio rose high above the receding hillside, 
so we enjoyed total privacy swathed in utter tranquillity. 
We told the cook/maid to stay home until noon, so we 
could fall out of bed into the pool wearing nothing at all 
for half the day. Perfect depressurizat 


ing 


GOING CHEAP 


If the Tronshore villas sound too uptownish, you 
should motor 65 miles west of Mo Bay to the rustic 
simplicity of Negril, which has thatched-roof A-frames 
nestled on cliffs at the end of the cleanest. straightest 
beach on the island. Its splendid isolation has made 
Negril the freak’s hideaway of the Caribbean—ganja and 
Bob Marley hang in the air. Negril also has the island's— 
be the world's—finest sunsets, complete with 
bamboo chairs and pina coladas facing west. At Rick's 
©, vou order a rum punch at the outdoor bar within 
sight of Negril Lighthouse, then walk ten feer to the 
dilFs edge and join daredevil Jamaican boys in cutoffs 
plunging down 40 feet into the pristine. coral-fringed 
grotto below—a poor man’s Acapulco. The Rock House, 
a clutch of Tahiti-style reed huts perched on coral out 
croppings connected by small wooden bridges, offers bunk 
beds, open-air plumbing and kitchenettes at $35 per night. 

These are lowscason prices (April-November). The 
weather during Jamaica's high season remains exactly 
the same (sunny, breezy, occasional showers), but there 
are а lot morc tourists. 

The good part of Jamaica’s outdated bad rep is the 
lack of competition for facilities. We took tennis lessons 
from a local pro at the Holiday Inn for seven dollars per 
hour, then played free there for the rest of the week. Goll 
and sailing cost a bit more, as do some of the breath- 
ingly romantic but expensive outdoor restaurants. We 
preferred the semi-native spots along the coast road, In 
one spot, we were served on an outdoor terrace with an 
enormous vine-covered tree growing up the middle. / 
midafternoon, we had the оссап and the wind to our 
selves. Specialties of the house: bluefish and stewed goat. 
Whatare you waiting for? — PETER ROSS RANGE 


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И The Roses Gimlet. 
Four parts vodka, one part elegance. 


The elegance, of course, is 
Rose's Lime Juice. Which is the 
essential ingredient for turning 
any vodka into the most elegant 
of cocktails. 

That's because Rose's Lime 
Juice has an uncanny way 
of stimulating the taste of 
vodka, gin or light rum without 
overasserting itself. 


Tomake the Rose's Gimlet 
properly, simply stir 4 to 5 parts 
vodka, gin or light rum with 
one part Rose's Lime Juice. 
Serve ice cold, straight up or 
on the rocks 

Tonight, try the Rose's Gimlet. 
It's made with elegance. To 
make you feel elegant whenever 
you have it. 


I 


IP 


j £u 
"нөт! 


TIPS ON KEEPING YOUR LIFESTYLE IN HIGH GEAR 


FINDING 
THE RIGHT 
HEALTH CLUB 


ealth clubs are serious business, Flamboyant, 

hyped up at times, but serious. Too many people 

join them on a whim and never return to use 
them. Before doing your bit for national fitness, resolve 
these questions in your mind: Do you really want lo 
devote three days a week to working out in a gym? Do you 
really have the lime to do it, all good intentions aside? If 
both answers are yes, the first person to talk to is your 
doctor. Because of our national eating, drinking and 
drug-taking habits, and because the heartattack danger 
zonc is now at the age of 35, anyone embarking on a stren: 
uous fitness program should haye a complete medical 
checkup and consider a heart stress test to show how 
much physical exertion he can handle. 


SIGN-IN FEES 


Membership fees for health clubs vary widely. For 
example, the Profile Fitness Center for Men, New York 
City's foremost spa, asks 3269 for onc ycar, $369 Гог two. 
It has generous gym space and equipment, with pleasing 
decor and such luxuries as a whirlpool and a masseur 
verly Hills Health Club in California, a large, 
ish establishment, offers everything from free gym. 
shorts to facilities for nude sun-bathing. Its fees are 5300. 
for one year, 5150 for two. (You'll find that membership 
fees usually decrease in proportion to the number of years 
for which you sign up.) The Body Center (Los Angeles 
and San Francisco), a smart, compact, two-floor Nautilus- 
equipped gym, asks $275 for 12 months, $375 for 18 
months. 

Membership fees buy full use of a club's facilities, but 
you should check them out carefully before signing any 
contracts. A few years ago, some unscrupulous promoters 
made news by selling membership contracts for clubs that 
didn't open on schedule, or that did not have the facilitic 
promised. Worse, members had no legal recourse, since 
their contracts had been turned over to other corporations. 

In 1975, the Federal Trade Commission set up guide- 
lines for clubs that may become national Jaw, These 
protective recommendations have already been voluntar- 
ily adopted by many establishments. Some of the benefits 
from the ЕТС guidelines include the right of members to 
resell unused time on their contracts, if they decide to 
quit, and prorated refund of the balance of the member 
ship fee, if a member can't use the club for serious 
medical reasons. In addition, many clubs have reciprocal 
agreements with spas in other towns, so members on the 
move can transfer their contracts or изе those faciliti 
when visiting. And many clubs now allow you to freeze 
your membership when you go on va re unable 


to use the gym because of short-term illness. In New York 
City, the Department of Consumer Affairs has sct its own 
rules and health clubs there are required to abide by 
them. In general, health-club memberships are safe 
investments, though in some parts of the country, ques- 
tionable practices continuc. 


CHECK LIST 


Make sure, too, that the club you're thinking of join 
has a schedule that will accommodate your own. Some 
spas split weeks, with men and women оп alternate 
days. Other clubs open at dawn, so you can work out 
belore going to the office. If your schedule is unpredict- 
able, you'll want a gym you can use at your convenience. 
JE you must cancel workouts frequently because of sched- 
ule limitations, you'll find your program falling apart 
and your interest in the gym deteriorating. 

Resident gym instructors should be knowledgeable 
enough or have enough formal taining to cnable them to 
set up a conditioning program suited to your goals and 
abilities. They should also be available for consultation, 
advice and moral support. 

"That psychological support is essential t0 a successful 
program. especially if you don't have a workout buddy or 
are not strongly self-motivated to exercise. Fitness studies 
indicate that a positive psychological attitude is almost as 
important to shaping up as physical exercise. If you ap- 
proach the gym reluctantly, hating the whole thing, you 
can actually hinder the mu: ding process. 


OTHER TIPS 


Most gyms provide the expected weights and equipment 
to develop the outer man. Many places now also feature 
Nautilus or Universal body-building machines, which are 
designed to shape you up scientifically and to take the 
guesswork out of weight taining. While they'll really 
build up your bod rapidly, you must use them under 
supervision at the start or risk spending the rest of your 
life walking like Quasimodo, 

Lockers should be provided on а daily basis. Many 
gyms make available permanent lockers as well, so you 
can store your gear on the premises. 

Whatever facilities your health club provides, the focus 
will probably be on weight lifting, Despite their cosme 
effect, weights alone do not constitute a healthy fitness 
regimen. You must combine weight lifting with swim 
ming, cycling, running or some other aerobic exercise 
for your heart and lungs. But that's enough talking: it's 
time you got busy building up your body. Let's hear it for 
physical fitness! — GEORGE MAZZEL 


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In our family business 


there’s three things you don’t mind 
spending your money on. Copper tub- 
ing. Fast cars. And a fine pair of warm, 
dry boots. And that third one is just as 
important as the first two. When you’re 
crouching down in some gully with your 
feet in ice-cold ditch water, never mov- 
ing a muscle for hours, whilst them 


damn Treasury agents snoop around 
with their dogs barking and sniffing, 
well, that's the time you're glad 
you didn't cut corners on your boots. 
These boots we bought are fine boots, 
well made, need no breaking in. But 
to us, that don't mean so much com- 
pared to the way they're waterproof 
and warm. 


A whole line of line leather boots 
that cost plenty, and should. 


TIPS ON KEEPING YOUR LIFESTYLE IN HIGH GEAR 


HOW TO GET A 
GOVERNMENT 
GRANT 


n the past six years, I have written applications for 
I Government and private-foundation grants totaling 
over $12,000,000. These grants have been awarded in 
education, health care, energy development, manpower 
and employment, counseling, fine arts, law enforcement 
and a wide variety of other areas. The fact is, the Federal 
Government each year gives away over 20 billion dollars 
for an incredible diversity of projects, large and small 
The smallest grant I obtained was for $6000 (it went to a 
tcacher who wanted to try out а new curricular approac 
my largest for $1,200,000 (for a physici. i 
new clinic in an isolated rural area). As a. professio! 
grant writer, I wrote those projects for others, but there 
js no reason why you cannot do the same for yourself. 
First, you must understand that it is not really you 
who gets the money. You must have (or create) a legiti- 
mate nonprofit corporation for the purpose of doing some 
social good. The legal steps involved in the corporate 
birth process are not terribly complex and any attorney 
сап assist you. Somewhat more difficult is obtaining the 
blessing of the ERS, which must be convinced that you do 
intend to help others rather than just fill your wallet. 


GEITING THE FACTS 


Next comes rescarch. Your nonprofit organization, of 
course, is dedicated to doing good works within your own 
area of expertise. Now you need to find out what the 
Government is funding. Your local library has a copy of 
the Catalogue of Federal Domestic Assistance. Tt lists 
Government programs and tells each program's purpose, 
how much money is available and what the range of grant 
wards is, Once you have selected the program you're 
nicrested in, ask to sce the Federal Register. There you 
will find specific rules and regulations, indication of 
funding cycles, application deadlines and program priori- 
ties. You will also find that the Register is difficult to read 
without practice. Don't despair. Your purpose is to suffi- 
ciently familiarize yourself with the program's jargon 
before you talk to a Government bureaucrat. 

The final part of the research effort is to call the Gov- 
ernment agency administering the program in your г 
gion, Ask to speak to the program оћсег for the project i 
question and request that you be sent an application 

packet and information on the selection criteria for the 
Pam While you have that person on the phone, take 
the opportunity to generally discuss the program's past, 
present and future. Get as much information as possible. 
And remember: Government bureaucrats are not the 
enemy; they are usually happy to help and arc anxious to 


find competent people to operate th 


programs. 


PUTTING IT TOGETHER 


That w y. Now comes the hard part. Assuming 
you still want a grant, you must submit à program pro- 
posal. Here are a few tips on proposal writing to increase 
your chances of success: First, know what the Government 
wants. Read the selection criteria, where it gives point 
values for different program components; design your 
program to conform to the priorities the agency has 
declared. are important to it. Make your document casy 
to read and understand. Include a le of contents, a 
summary at the beginning, а set of clearly defined pro- 
gram goals and a well-written explanation of how you are 
going to spend the money. Have the document profession- 
ally typed, attractively bound and carefully reproduced 

Make sure your budget is realistic. Write yourself 
(program director, consultant, whatever is appropriatc) 
for an amount of money that is fair and is based on com. 
monly accepted professional fees, Don't claim you can 
produce miracles on ridiculously low budgets: The review- 
er will know better and reject your proposal. Don't spend 
lavishly, either. Promise a good program value. 

Pay particular attention to working relationships you 
may have with others that are а special resource of your 
organization. Never point out your faults, and if your new 
corporation has never done anything before, emphasize 
your personal expertise and the experience of those with 
whom you will be working. 


5 


GETTING HELP 


I believe that most people are capable of putting to- 
gether a good proposal and getting it funded. If, however, 
you {eel you need help, there are consulting firms available 
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rd 
D 
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= (continued from page 15: 


“Leon was incorporated in Delaware, so he could 
enjoy that state’s liberal corporate advantages.” 


PLAYBOY 


right behind that, 1'd say something that 
would pertain to boxing: 

But the dominant figure in training 
camp for the Ali fight was, of course 
Lewis. He used his position like a gong: 
He was loud and insistent and some- 
limes got on people's nerv 


A sparring partner of Spinks quit 
camp after telling Lewis that he ought 
10 learn to respect people. Eventually 


Solomon, whom Lewis berated in pub- 
lic on. more than one occasion, got to 
feeling similarly. One night, he told 


Lewi you want to fight, 
nigger. people like they're 
noil aid of you. I may be 


ht in 


old man. But I'll punch you ri 
the mouth.” A similar threat wi de 
by Top Rank PR man Chet Cummings 
kicked at his hotel door to 
ior 
ks won the heavyweight 
crown, Lewis was not overly modest about 
his role in the title coup. "What you all 
taking Вор / 
ask photographers. "What vou all doing 
lia 
Spinks 
continued to berate aide 
front of Spinks. 
pushy with the cl 

On the eve of March 
Lewis told Spinks he wanted him to 
attend the Mike Rossm Alvaro 
“Yaqui” Lopez lightheavyweight fight at 
Madison Square Garden. This followed 
Leon’s nearly daylong wait for I 
Тор Rank's offic. When Spinks declined 
to see the fight, Lewis insisted. He said 
that as champion, Leon owed his public 
such appearances. Later, Spinks would 
complain about being badgered yet one 
more time. On that night, however, what 
made it more galling was that, with Nova 
back home, Leon had been looking for- 
ward to spending the evening with a 
lady he'd flown up from North Caro 
That was personal turf. And it made it 
one push too many. 

By then, he'd suffered. Lewis dervish 
style 100 long. One sticky situation after 
another. Never a moment's peace. Now, 


k's office, Lewis 

sometimes i 
nd he could be just а 
pion himself, 


second, 


Us. 


as heavyweight king, he thought he'd 


carned the right to an orderly reign. And 
if his old mahatma, Lewis, wa 
built for that, then Spinks was prepared 
to go elsewhere. 

‘The morning after the Rossman-Lopez 
match, Leon met with a 49-year-old for- 
mer Wayne County, Michigan, circuit- 
court judge named Edward Е. Bell. Bell, 
а tall, thin man of dignified mien, was 

210 now a practicing attorney in Detroit. 


s not 


Spinks told Bell that his айай 
chaotic and needed changing. 

Bell impressed Spinks. The attorney 
had a cool understated manner that 
contrasted sharply with the klaxon style 
of Lewi 

Indeed, later on the same day that 
Spinks met with Bell, Lewis again showed 
the champ surprising contempt—and 
disrespect. ш he'd miss an airplane 
flight, Butch hurried into a limousine on 
Park Avenue that had been hired for 
Leon's use. “Grab yourself a cab,” Lewis 
told Spinks, as he commandeered the 
limousine and sped to the airpo 

A few days later, їп Detroit, Spinks 
nnounced that Bell now represented 
him. With Bell, he hoped, would come a 
ance of order. 

б 
March 30, 1978: In suite 810 of De- 
x. where the law firm 
ntains its office, 
the Spinks watch was on its third day. 

Spinks's attorneys, Bell and Bell's col- 
league Lester Hudson, had sent a former 
Detroit police officer, who also tracked 
down bail jumpers, out to St. Louis to 
find the heavyweight c 

The ex-cop, who had just hired on as 

a Spinks bodyguard, had left Detroit, 
y 1I the motherfucker is there, 
ГИ find him." 
Bell and Hudson hoped so. They had 
rum on the phone daily, talking to him 
about a deal with a group of Africans 
(who were Imer replaced by the New 
Orleans people) on the Spinks-Ali re- 
match. The neg ons soon would 
require their flying to New York in the 
company of Spinks, 

Bell and Hudson were not the only 
people who wanted Spinks in Detroit. 
Richard J. Smit did. too. Smit was a car 
salesman who had driven up three days 
before from the Johnny Kool Oldsmo- 
bile agency in Ind 
а 1977 custom-built white Lincoln Con- 
tinental limousine that he meant to sell 
to Spinks for $35,000—55000 down, a 
tenanonth Jease and a final "balloon" 
pay-out. 

The vehicle went with the new 


s were 


size-42 ta 
d been hand-deliv 


lor-made suits th 
1 three days ear- 


For those three ys, Bell and Hud- 
son had been talking persuasively into 
my tape recorder of the mechanisms that 
they had set up to ensure that Spinks's 


career would run smoothly and that he 
would rise up as a Palookaville do-good- 
er, a shining example to the youth of 
It was the image Leon talked 
Нер the kids, gorta he'p the 
 say—an ambition that some- 
how always was being id. 

The mechanisms were supposed to 
change that. Like G.M. and Howard 
Hughes, Leon was now incorporated in 
Delaware, so he could enjoy that state's 
liberal corporate advantages. Spinks Jr. 
Organization Inc: At that date, Spinks 
was its only officer. The setup provided 

icf, as well as a sense of his 
own future. He had, it turned out, take 
10 carrying ап attaché case, prompting a 
ag: 
9: What's that you got in your 
spanks: That my онсе. 


and? 


In fact, though, a real office, carpeted 
and with a view of Detroit's Congress 
Street, had be d for Spinks in 
suite 840. 

Downstait onal Bank of 
Detroit, an account for Spinks was 
up. WI ned of his с 


in the №, 


quarterly tax payments 
on his fight earn When Top Rank 
sent him to а New York accounting firm, 
Lcon showed up with a shopping bag 
full of cash receipts. But Spinks was now 
supposed to be catching on to fiscal com- 
plexities. When Bell and Hudson's t 
specialist had asked the high school drop- 
out if he understood why he had to docu- 
ment expenses morc carefully, Spinks 
had answered, “You're talking "bout my 
business partner [Uncle Sam] . . . look- 
ing over my shoulder . . . comin’ in, 
saying, ‘I'm not gonna let you get away 
with this." 


е made for Spinks 
to pursue a general-education degree. To 
improve his speech, he'd bought a tape 
order (“Not а liule bitty box,” he'd 
say, “a big box . . . made by Pioneer . . . 
that I know I can get the whole sound 
of my voice into it”), so that he could 
hear himself and learn from it. And then 
The Leon Spinks Calendar. 

On white cardboard the size of fight 


there w 


doing. 

Spinkss future engagements were 
marked in red апа bl inks—red for 
tentative and black for solidly booked 
dates. In the month ahead, Spinks was 
to receive the Ring magazine champi 
ship belt (4/4) in New York, lay over a 
t the Hilton and travel to Phil: 
;, where he would be honored by 


delph 


THE SOCIABLE SOUR: 
TART, TASTY, AND FILLED 
WITH MEMORIES OF 
СООР TIMES WITH GOOD F BILE) Ds 


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TRY IT...ALL THE LIQUOR'S IN IT. T. 


PLAYBOY 


“Let me put it this way . . . some of us have it and some 
of us don’t. Unfortunately, sir....” 


212 


the city of Philadelphia and would tape 

The Mike Douglas Show (4/6). Then: 
April 10-15 
April 16-22 


Fla. training 

arribean [sic] exhibi- 
tion tour 

April 23-29 Carribean [sic] exhibi- 
tion tour 


It was an impressivelooking docu- 
ment, except for one thing: its efficacy. 
Leon Spinks, who had only to catch a 
plane to Detroit, hadn't been up to it 
for three days running, a fact that jibed 
less with the blueskies future that Bell 
d Hudson foresaw for Spinks than 
with events of the past weeks 

‘Then there was the inforn 
my Spinks source, Whisper, th. 
jagged feel of self-destruct: 

‘Leon is still Leon, That's the amazing 
thing. Still irresponsible. Wants to do 
exactly what he wants lo do. He's gol ... 
something a little loose there, 1 think, 

“Like, he doesn't have a driver's li- 
cense and yel he continues to drive. А 
couple of days after he was arrested for 
driving without a license, he drove a guy 
I know to the airport. Like, it didn't faze 
him at all. With Leon, these things just 
happen. Very spontancousby. And he 
goes with il. 

“Then last week, his bodyguard was ex- 
pecting his wife to fly in lo St. Louis 
from Des Moines. Since the wife was 
staying with Nova, Leon says there's a 
possibility that Nova might be on the 
зате flight. If Nova's on the plane, 
Spinks says, the guy is to call up. I's 
like a little game with Nova and Leon. 
OK? Leon [lies out of town. She follows 
him. She never sees him. Leon flies out 
of town again. She follows him. Like 
Marlene Dietrich in ‘Morocco? 

"Sure enough, Nova's on the plane. 
The guy calls up to find out what to do. 
The problem here is that Spinks has a 
broad staying with him. So? What's the 
answer? Take the broad and stash her in 
another hotel? No. Too easy. They put 
Nova in the room Leon had stayed in. 
And Leon gets another suite, two flights 
up. Same hotel. Nova thinks he's not 
even in the building. The way il went, 
Novwa’s downstairs. The girlfriend is up- 
stairs. And the news guy is trying 10 get 
Leon to sil still for an interview. 

“Spink 
you crazy 

That same afternoon, waiting in Bell 
and Hudson's office with car salesman 
Smit and others, 1 wondered if I would 
go crazy, as Whisper had prophesied. 
What I did know for sure was that I 
had a bad case of the fidgets. Three days 
of waiting to talk with the heavyweight 
champion. 

The hoped-for vision of order was 
clearly down the tubes. Where was the 
artlul dodger? Late that alternoon, a St. 
Louis Post-Dispatch reporter heard that 
Spinks was signing autographs in the 


ation from 
had the 


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gheuo and phoned Leon's bodyguard 
with the address. At thar point, Nova 
and the bodyguard slipped away from 
the ex-cop from Detroit and went look- 
ing for Leo 

Spinks was where he was said to be. 
The bodygua w the silver Chrysler 
New Yorker that Leon drove when he 
n St. Louis and told Nova that he'd 
retrieve Leon. Instead, he told Spinks, 
“Your wife is here, man," which g 
Spinks and his St. Louis woman 
chance to drive 


was 


the 
y. Back at the hotel, 
Nova knocked on the door of the ex-cop's 
room and told him that the bodyguard 
had screwed up. 

At the time this was occurring, Smit 


was emerging from а 
office in Detroit to say 
ing a guy with the < 
knows Spinks. To se 
up. The word is: Be 

A smile flickered across Smits lips. 
ich serewy twist of waiting for Leon 
perverse entertainment. for him. 
But that was ending. Smit left Detroit 
that afternoon, regreting he hadn't had 
а chance to try his pitch on the heavy- 
weight champion. 
use | know Spinks is a buyer," 
Smit said. "All I got to do is stick his 
as in the seat. Boom! Thirty-five Gs. 
Cashier's check, if you please. MI I need 
is five minutes.” 

On the chance that Spinks would slip 
into. Detroit in the near [uture, Smit left 
the limousine with a relative of a fellow 
employ d made menis to 
have it driven back to Indianapolis il it 
turned out that Leon was on a sabbatical. 

As for me, 1 thought of catching а 
flight to St. Louis but had the paranoiac 


torney Hudson's 
"They're contact- 
police who 
a dig him 


vision of Spinks's plane passing mine in 
the night, with Leon flashing me a de- 
monic jack-o-la 

1 wok an eveni 


On his own, Spinks flew to Detroit 
the next day. 

He hadn't much to say, except about 
the limousine. On that item, he did not 
appear to need Smit 
informed spiel on gear ratios or rearaxle 
options. Spinks saw the white Lincoln 
Continental limousine with the gold 
striping, He saw the AM/FM stereo cas- 
sene player, the smallscreen color TV, 
the digital clock, the bar, the sun roof, 
the phones for in-car communications 
and the two back rows of facing seats in 
crushed velour 
what he knew. As Leon put it 
That my motherfucking 
buying.” 


Never mind the 


He saw all that and knew 


cur. Pm 


б 
From St. Louis, Nova phoned Detroit 


ter that day 

"You tell Leon,” she said, "that I'm 
going to sue him for divorce. lm going 
to take all his money. And you tell him 


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216 


if he wants to discuss ii 
parents in Des Moines.' 

As she hung up, though, Nova, a wom- 
an of more than 200 pounds, winked 
at the. photographer from the Post-Dis- 
patch and said, "I'm going right to De- 
troit, Just said that about Des Moines to 
throw him off my tracks." 

+ 

When Spinks won the championship, 
the press wrote traditional copy about 
the ghetto fighter’s transcending dep 
Чоп. A few unkind reporters carped 
pout the slurred speech and fractured 
syntax and the dearth of feeling the new 
champion had for the press. Ali backlash, 
so to speak. But by and large, Spinks 
was warmly depicted. 

The fact was, though, he was not O.J. 
black, not the establishment's kind of 
colored, He had the discomforting sound 
of the back-alley, muscatel-swigging black 
man, and a hard-edged look to go with 
it. So when incidents began to occur, the 
press was not disposed to go easy on him. 

That did not surprise Spinks, From 
the start, he'd. met resistance аз cham- 
pion. In some quarters, he was still re- 
garded as a man whose triumph over Ali 
was a freak of ti f. а fortuitous con- 
junction of fate and Muhammad's mid- 
dlc арс. In dreams before the title match, 
Spinks had conjured up the image of his 
arms raised in triumph, but he never 
imagined the thorny times that would 
follow. 

“Like, 1 remember,” 


I'm going to my 


he said later, 


when we finally connected, “the first 
time I went back to St. Louis after I 
won the championship. I was in a club. 
I was supposed to meet the manager of 
the place. I was waiting there when a 
guy ran up to me, point a finger in my 
face, say, "You ain't shiit. You ain't 
' And, like, I almost went at him, 
You understand? 'Cause somebody say 
-.. that’s just like saying, "Let's get 
let's fight.’ I got a heating sensa- 
tion in my body. A burning sensation 
my chest and neck. Like what I used to 
get when I'm out on the street. But I 
thought, No, man, that ain't you. Look 
at you now. I mean, even though he's 
hollering about how much he hates 
you... and whatever . . . a lot of people 
around here do love you. Like the people 
in the club—they said to the guy, ‘Who 
in the hell is you, nigger, to come to our 
champ like that 

"The encounter in St. Louis was the first 
of several instances in which strangers 
accosted Spinks and bad-mouthed him to 
his face. His correspondence contained a 
percentage of hate mail, too. mostly pro- 
voked, it scemed, by his victory over Ali, 
ol whom he was genuinely fond. "What 
a joyful man Ali is,” Spinks had said 
belore the fight. 

Compared with Ali, Spinks lacked the 
grace in public. At times, he could 
be a sunny soul, breaking into a grin 
that looked nearly equine in the close- 
ups that photographers snapped. At oth- 
er times, he was perplexed by the people 


"I would say that your feelings of inadequacy 
represent progress. When you first came here, you 
thought you were pretty hot stuff.” 


he encountered, particularly those who 
stared dead in his face without speak- 
ng. For those cases, Spinks had ac 
quired а line—"What's wrong with you, 
you Ш or something?"—that had proved 
helpful. "When I say it, then everybody 
start laughing. Whatever." Whatever. It 
was not casy being the heavyweight 
champion. 

For Spinks, the problem was com- 
pounded by a lack of education that had 
been exploited before. Barnes said that 
when Spinks joined the Marines, he was 
under the impression that it was for a 
two-year hitch rather than the four-year 
term stated in his papers. 

Once, to clarify whether ог not 
Spinks’s brother Evan had an S at the 
end of his name, ked Leon to spell it. 
He took two faltering stabs at the spell- 
g and gave up with an exclamation of 
‘Oh, wow 
Spinks's ingenuousness invited an at- 
mosphere of conniving and i 


was 


built into the heavyweight champion's 
Even friends tried to take 


“Some of them,” Spinks said Jater, "t 
to hit me up for money. I tell ‘em, "Well, 
1 fought hard and I worked hard to get 
where І got. Don't take away my gusto, 
se you ain't got none. All you got to 
do is to make it for yourself and then you 
have some gusto. And then you ain't 
gotta ask nobody for anything.’ ” 

Spinks is a creature of contradictory 
pieces, cluding casy labels, Although he 
hasn't the glibness of Ali—his sentences 
often lurch and sputter—he sometimes 
strikes a rough poetic note with his 
words. "I broke out in a thousand tears," 
or "Nobody really finds hisself, "cause if 
he finds hisself, he knows the future 
Similarly, though he takes his image with 
what sometimes seems undue sobricty 
("I don't want nobody to sce me just like 
а Tom, Dick and Harry. I want to always 
keep an image as a nice neat man"), he 
reacted with boyish hilarity when TV 
had a laugh at his expense. 

What's that man," he asked, "that 
tells jokes .. . on The Gong Show . . . 
has a bag on his face? Yeah. Unknown 
Comic. He made a joke on me one night. 
Said, "I'm going to do an image of Leon 
Spinks! Turns around, took the first bag 
off, put another bag on his face. Had the 
whole front of the bag black, with two 
teeth missing, And he turned back 
around, changed his face mask back, said, 
"You didn't know [ was two-faced, either, 
did you? "That gassed me, man. I die 
ighing. I went in and holler out to my 
wile. Said, "This fool is doing an image 
of mi 

One moment Spinks would yank a 
cork from a bottle of champagne with 
his teeth. The 
to his chest or suck his thumb 
for an interview. The word n 
has been applied to him. Even Nova has 


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been quoted as using it. It is a good 
word, evoking the contradictory forces 
within Spinks that make him dilficult to 
pin down. 

The odd angles at which Spinks some 
times carries his hands—reminiscent at 
times of the singer Joe Cocker: 
of a repertoire of body quirks 
moods. A bounce to his step indicates 
he is in good humor. At those times, 
ect carriage has a dancer's lithe 
quality. In foul moods, he draws in his 
neck and cocks his head to the side, 
which has an ominous effect. 

But he сап be sweetly auenti 
“You know what I like?” he asked 
ing the mommas, All the mommas are 
big and fat. They get excited when they 
scc me. They be grabbing оп me"— 
nks twists his shoulders from side to 
in recollection—"la. de la, la de la 


g to Detroit from Boston, Leon 
ttle girl, about seven years of 

ics of operations on 
r unable to speak 
at the time of the flight. “Her parents," 
Spinks said, "had just picked her up 
from the hospi And her birthday were 
coming up. So I sung Happy Birthday to 
her. Yeah, 1 sung it to her. And I gave 
her my autograph, And then we sit back 
there апа... we writing notes. We was 
talking to each other . . . through notes. 
We just talked about anything and every- 
thing. Anything that she asked me about, 
1 would tell he he asked about boxing. 
She asked how a guy could get hit on the 
face like that. I said, "Well, baby, it's all 
in the job. 
pinks is a visceral person who is not 
id to express himself. To the anony- 
mous benefactor who'd flown his mother 
to the Montreal Olympics, Leon said, 
“You it's the nicest thing that’s 
ever happened to us. We just love you 
i п confronted by LeDoux's 
» Spinks had asked in the 
“Why you ch remark u 


ring, 
had struck LeDoux by its ingenuous in- 
flections. 


The most striking instance of man- 
child expressiveness occurred the night 
Spinks talked to me of his ghetto up- 
bringing, the anguish and humiliation of 
which apparently were vividly felt. At 
one point, as he paced his room in the 
as Hilton, growing more agitated, 
he stopped and, with a stricken expres- 
sion, said, “Get me out of here, get me 
out of St. Louis" which really only 
meant he wanted to change the subject 

Spinks has what seems an obsessive tic 
to his past. speech reflects it. His 
words do not falter or get jammed up at 
the beginning of sentences when the sub- 
ject is ghetto travail. Is as though he's 
had the same thoughts many times be- 
fore, "I was the type of person who was 
quiet," Spinks said. "People could do 
different things to me and I'd come by 


RC 1 ca 


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That's why we, the people who make 


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dropped an olive down Norma Gray’ blouse 
last night.” 


MC 


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Bethelife of the party. Not the laugh 


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IT'S PEOPLE WHO GIVE DRINKING 
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PLAYBOY 


220 


and make my momma think everything 
was all right, 1 would lock everything in- 
side myself. Because the hurt I felt, I 
always kept it to myself. I never did try 
to explain to people what hurt I had 
went through.” 

His father is at the core of his pained 
memories. Leon, eparated from the 
family when the boy was young, WI 


contacts Spinks had with him afterward 
were mostly di 


appointing—he remem- 
bers being ridiculed and whupped—and 
filled him with a desire “to be the man 
my daddy wasn't." 

There is a darker side to Spinks that 
possession of the heavyweight title 
seemed to provoke. Whisper had a story 
in that reg 

"I knew George Foreman before he 
knocked out Joe Frazier. A real gung-ho 
nice kind of kid. Now, the morning after 
he knocked out Joe Frazier, he walked 
in to the press conference - and lil 


this: ‘Hey, get the hell off that couch, 
man, .. . You, I don't want you sitting 


there. He's rearranging the тоот. How 
to sit. How to take pictures. And you 
knqu who did the same thing the day 
after he won? I swear, Leon Spinks. ‘Get 
off the couch; he told news guys. He's 
barking commands as to who sits where. 
‘Clear that couch. Get out of the way. 
Uncanny. Absolutely uncanny, Almost to 
the T” 

The 


its mix of 
headlines and hotel suites and the Na- 
tional Enquirer asking Leon 10 by-line 
WHY 1 LOVE AMERICA,” 

Being the heavyweight champion mat- 
tered. People simply did not worry about 
of champions in other 

m 


weight divisions. The almighty sli 


belonged to the heavyweight king. And 
with 


it went the 
ady fanfares 


cognition, concern 
nherent. Snubbed at 
tan's chic Studio 54 
when he was a challenger, Spinks was 
“olee olee in free” as the champion. 

F Spinks, though, some measure of 
his newly acquired fame was the motion 
nd commotion he could trigger. Bodies 
snapped to. That could be exhilarating 
for a young man whose background was 
filled with nd rejection. 
Spinks's w especially the 
ones he lived when he bolted, had people 
dashing about, worrying and wondering 
about hi t might appear selfish 
from close up. By the 19 w, though, 
it was a pay-h a hard, cold past. As 
Spinks once Sce, my dad said Td 
amount to nothing. He would tell people 
that. And it hurt me to hear lı 
It stayed in my mind. Why'd he say 
What for? Call me a fool out of the blue. 
Not to my face but to people who'd tell 
it to me. And that became my thing— 
to be somebody 

Underlying all contradictions, it some- 


nes seemed, was a mad pleasure in the 
ppropriate moment, the attraction to 
which brought unanticipated twists: 
Spinks would experience seizures of 
ghter in the midst of a sober account 
of one of his St. Louis driving busts or 
while he analyzed his impromptu disap- 
They were great gurgling 
ighter shot through with an 
unhinged quality 

At those times, the phrase “inappro- 
priate response" had flashed in my mind 
like the тил light on a pinball machine, 
the laughter suggesting a self-destructive 
impulse of the kind that n 
heroes. 

Was Spinks's gusto jı 
"He's got . . . something a little loose 
there, E think,” Whisper had said of 
The words applied, though, to the whole 
shebang—the Spinks H ‘Times d 
Soul Aplenty Caravan a hard 
scene to get a бх on. There was the con- 
tinuing sense of the whole works’ being 
slightly out of whack, bent in 
orderly vision could possibly str 
о 


t а bit bent? 


WELCOME LEON SPINKS 
HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION 
OF THE WORLD, 


quee outside the DiLido 
Beach, Tt was April 11, 
the day of the news conference with 
Alî. 1 had accompanied Spinks from New 
Orleans to Miami. 

Situated on the ocean, with its front 
entrance on Collins Avenue, the DiLido 
is a high-rise hotel with a spacious L- 
shaped lobby and walls covered with 


als of boats and trees and 
monkeys a The aura is art-deco 
daft—a movie set out of a Thirties com 


edy. It appeared to possess the right cock- 
eyed charm for the Spinks entourage. 
The mood was high on arrival 

During the press conference in New 
Orleans, Leon had had this exchange: 


NEWSM. Ac the a 
you'd have someth 
you signed the contra 
have to say now? 

spiss: Santa Claus. 


port, you said 
g to say after 
ict. What do you 


He growled the words with a loving 
Saichmo sound, grinning as he did 
Santa Claus: shorthand that meant the 
getting had been good—Spinks's si 


ture assured millions of dollars 
would be Fhe pleasure remained 
At the airport in Miami, when a TV 


sportscaster asked Spinks to describe how 
it felt to whip Ali, he smiled and did a 
sol ic. at the finish of wi 
and s 


hoe rout 
tended his hand 


Be: 


walked 
Lincoln Road Mall, where he signed au- 
tographs, mugged for cameras, kissed 


in Miami h. he 


women and shopped. 


"How much those shoes?" he asked, 


12 Pierre Car- 


pointing to а pi 

din loafers. 
“Not too тис! 5 
“Then FH take them, 
From a thick wad of currency, Leon 

peeled off a $100 bill for the salesman. 


lesman said. 


ks asked. 


foney clips." 


“Yes, Mr. Spinks. 
“OK. Gimme опе. 
Spinks tried to insert h 


Spinks spent a sunny day in M 
h. grinning, dancing across street 
quipping to young women (“Whaddaya 
say, momma?"). That night, Spinks, а 
welterweight named Roger Stafford and 
I stood by a low stone wall at the end 
of Lincoln Road, watching the ocean 
break ns the shore just below. 
Spi s in a form-fitting maroon shirt 
and cream-colored slacks. He and Staf- 
ford were drinking California pink cham- 
pagne. A gentle breeze blew. 

“Te gonna be good to hit some mother- 
fucker again,” said Spinks, putting his 
glass on the wall and inhaling а smoke. 
ahhhh, I know,” said Stafford, set- 
ting his drink down, too. 

Spinks struck a fighting pose, bent 


s wa 


at the knees, and let his hands go. 
"Whap! Whap! ford said, as he 
watched. Then Stafford 


punches through the air, 
grunting sounds as he d 
way I did it to that dude," he said, re- 
ferring to a рге! y bout he'd fought 
that weekend on national TV. "АП over 
the motherfucker.” 

“Yeahhhh,” said Spinks 

“1 whupped that dude good” 

"Hey. My m pinks interrupted, 
g me. you ain't gonna 
put in the ar-ti-cle that T smoke, is you? 

"Heywy," D said, with an elabo 
shrug that was not quite an answ 
‘Count of my image.” Spinks said. 

Spinks thought about it and then for- 
got about it and began to move sii 
ly. reducing his shadow punches to a 
stoned dance. 

“Women,” sa 
women 
Women," 
ot to. 
weet nothin, 
No. Lies" s 


uous- 


Stafford. “Got to get 


nswered Spinks. 


” I asked. 
id Stafford. “Tell "em 


ooned Spinks, his body 
rocking as he grinned. “Tell ‘em liieecs.” 
Stafford swayed in “Liiieeees.” 
“Tell ‘em есес" 
They doubled over in laughter, 
making plashing sounds with hi 
‘Liiicees. 


when a team of women 
s from Terre Haute, Indiana, rec- 
ognized him. Out came the cameras. 


obliged by posing for snapshots, 
drinking champagne refills as he d 

“Get оша my pitcher," а pretty 
black woman said, "Just me 
man." 

A howler in pin curlers arrived. “We 
was dressed for bed and they come up 
and said Leon Spinks.” 

“Leon,” a heavy-set woman said, “let 
me show you a picture of my grand- 
children. They triplets." 


"Where's the champagne?” another 
bowler wondered. 
“Its on me,” Spinks said, moving 


toward the hotel restaurant, waving his 
arm when the women hesitated. “Come 
on, ladies. 

Soon after, the Spinks caravan was on 
the move, Up the road it went to Place 
Pigalle, a Miami Beach club whose all- 
girl revue and X-rated comedienne, 
Pearl Williams, were the attractions. 
Tuesdays, though, Wi ins was off. < 
for this night, the strippers would do. 

The Leon Spinks Calendar had called 
for Spinks го spend this second week in 
April training for his Caribbean tour. 
But the good times would roll instead. 
The sun was coming up when the heavy- 
weight champ made it back to the 
DiLido. 


P 

A few days later, there wa: 
cident that still lives in my 
was standing in the DiLido penthouse 
number one, his $100-a-day lodgings, 
idling for a moment before plunging 
into another d: The sun streamed 
through a space in the drapes. His step 
had a loose, casy swing. Then suddenly 
he was holding up the index finger of 
each hand and, with a rhumbalike mo- 
tion of the hips, he began to move, 
chanting in a comically falsetto voice, 
“Penthouse number one, penthouse num- 
ber one"—and smiling. The style was 


nother in- 
4. Spinks 


all Spinks's. Penthouse number one: top 
of the world, momma. 

But with Spinks, the pleasure of being 
up there was never far removed from the 
trick impulses that could bring him 
down. And as the week progressed in 
Miami Beach, there were troubling notes. 


to be pushed back a мес! 
in The Spinks Calendar that left Leon 
susceptible to demon whispers, A call 
from Lewi: d problems. As he 
hung up, Spinks muttered, “One thing 
nother. Shit. Shit, Shit" 

few days later, as Nova arrived 
n the run 
. Louis. There were 
s there with Barnes. Barnes had 
agreed to take less than his customary 
30 percent of the purse for the Spinks-Ali 
rematch, but he had grievances that 
could threaten the bout. 

Lewis was to meet Spinks in St. Louis. 
Before Lewis left, he phoned the DiLido 
to check on Spinkss whereabouts. In 


penthouse number one, Nova picked up 
the phone, heard Lewis’ voice and hung 
up. She figured he was to blame for 
Spinks's latest abrupt departure. 

Lewis found Spinks and told him that 
a meeting in New York was planned to 
ighten out details of the Spinks-Ali 
rematch, The various interests—Barnes, 
Bell, Arum—would be there. Spinks 
agreed to the trip but kept delaying. 

Оп Wednesday, 19, Lewis urged 
him to leave St. Louis. Spinks seemed in- 
clined to but asked, ke my baby 
with me to New York?"—a reference to 
his St. Louis woman. Lewis told him he 
vhat he wanted—just be on the 
flight to New York. Spinks's woman said 
she had to get her clothes. Lewis waited 
at the airport. When Spinks did. not ap- 
he gave up and flew back to New 
That was on Thursda 


radio that Spinks was busted 
“Has been released on 


involving suspected drug vi 
and failure to produce a driver's license. 
He was booked n of two 
counts of violating the Missouri con- 
trolledsubstance law by possession of 
marijuana and cocaine. Police say war- 
rants will be sought later today. Arrested. 


with Spinks was a 26-year-old 
companion.” 

A later repor 
and 550 bills w 
Spinks's car. 

With the heavyweight champion in- 
volved, guilty or innocent hardly mat- 
tered, Wheels would turn, deals could be 
made. In fact, the drug charges were later 
dropped. But... . 

Whisper called the next day. 

“Battling Siki,” he said. 
Who; 

“Battling Siki, my friend. Real name 
Lonis Phal. A Senegalese Negro. Won 
the light-heavyweight championship in 
1922. Knocked out Georges Carpentier in 
six rounds. Paris, France. Siki was called 
the Singular Senegalese. And he came 
here а таю fucking African. We're going 
back over 50 years. Loved his wine, wom- 
en and song. And belling guys in the 
chops. And wearing the grass-shirt-and- 
top-hat kind of thing. He's buried here 
in New York. Out in Flushing, Long Is- 
land. A couple of years ago, а boxers’ as- 
sociation put a tombstone up. Died 
in a fucking bar brawl in New York City. 
December 15, anno Domini 1925. Look it 
up.” 

And he clicked off. 


woman 


stated that torn $10, $2 
¢ found in the trunk of 


“My God! My wife! My clone!” 


221 


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DOLPHIN GIRL conned om pose 20 


“My feelings must have projected to the dolphins. 
Suddenly, they were all around the boat.” 


The whole school seemed to be in har- 
mony, while smaller groups seemed to 
establish an even closer empathy. It 
de me begin to believe in telepathy 
among dolphins. Since water is nearly 
1000 times as d. air, perhaps some 
‘ations—too thin for air to carry— 
can be transmitted through water. 

aming along with 
them, hoping they would come to accept 
me and reveal some of their secrets. 1 
was rewarded by being admitted to the 
center of the herd; 1 was literally in a 
doud of dolphins. One seemed partic- 
ularly friendly; I named him Notchback 
and concentrated my attention on him. 
We had several long swims, swimming in 
unison and surfacing for air together. 

It was during that summer that I met 
Steve Sipman and Ken LaVasseur, who 
had just released two dolphins. Puka 
and Kea, from a r ch establishment. 
Steve and Ken had been assistant re- 
searchers for two years, living within 15 
feet of the dolphins. Puka and Kea, who 
had been the subjects of research expe 
ments for as much as 13 years, were kept 
n separate tanks in isolation from cach 
other and their kind. Steve and Ken were 
so in tune with these dolphins that they 
knew they were depressed and suffering, 
so under the veil of night, they carefully 
returned them to the ocean. 

Ironically. Steve and Ken exchanged 
their freedom for the freedom of the 
dolphins; they wei ismonth 
prison sentences for gr . But 
Steve told me, “It was worth it; nothing 
they s bad as 
what was co 
phins. I would do it again 

That convinced me more than ever of 
the need to demonstrate the possibility of 
ing with dolphins in the open 
п, The efforts of many researchers 
jı captive dolphins have undeniably 
valuable foundation for their 
an see no justi- 
ng to keep them in 
. Whether 


do to us would be 
ng down on those dol 


laid a 


captivity for re 
dolphins are as * 


has not been proved, but my experience 


ces 


con e that they are super 
mals worthy of special respect and that 
nyone wishing 10 study them should do 
so in their own environment. 

Last spring, 1 returned for the third 
time to the dolphins’ domain. It took us 
many days under the hot sun to re- 
establish. contact, They seemed with- 
drawn, elusive. Our activities during the 


previous years had drawn attention to 
their presence and accessibility, and 
many other people had been visiting 
them. Deep down, I was worried that 
they would not accept me this time. My 
feclings must have projected to the dol- 
phins, Suddenly, they were there, all 
around the boat, а ng me in. I 
slipped into the clear, cool water with a 
sh of anticipation and immediately 
began to recognize old friends. There 
was a newborn baby in the group, no 
more than three fect long, swimming 
close to its mother, like a shadow. Е no- 
ticed a pure-white adult dolphin I had 


never seen before, which made me won- 
der how their tribes intermix. Then I 
saw Notchback. I surprised at how 
glad I felt to sce him again. As before. 
he nearly always stayed close to me and 
I concentrated my attention on him. 

As we got closer than ever before, I 
was startled to rcalize how large he really 
was. He was about eight feet long and I 
suppose would weigh about 300 pounds. 
Being that close, J could sce the muscles 
ppling and flexing beneath his tight 
silvery skin. His body markings, shades 
of gray and silver, were beautiful, and 
his dark sensitive eyes watched con- 
tinuously. We were so close that 1 could 
feel the currents created by his undulat- 
ing movements. Fins i 
m's length and I experienced a sensa 
tion TI never forget. As I reached out, I 
felt him quiver at my touch, 


“No cunnilingus for the count.” 


223 


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KINCS 


(continued from page 197) 
suggested that they practice during the 
day. 

The call frightened Maleno and Soli 
and they decided to flee w the goods 
they had collected. They tied up Mrs. 
and placed her under a 
Melendez was left in 
s extremely nerv- 
pself 
McKinnon 
сей an impe 
ing and turning, 
the next step to take. Finally, Mrs. Mc- 
Kinnon persuaded him to untie her. As 
soon as he did, she ran to the guest room, 
grabbed one of her host's hunting rifles, 
woke her husband. gave the rille to him 
and hurriedly but lucid explained what 
had happened. The explanation w 
more sobering than 40 cups of 
coffee. The doctor rushed into Kn. 
bedroom. Knight seemed to be dead 
doctor gave him mouth-to-mouth re 
ion. As he leaned back from 
efforts, he saw 
Knight’ 5 bed. “I didn't do it, I didn't do 
Melendez screamed. He was holding 
the gun and the knife. McKinnon wres- 
ted with him, but Melendez eased his 
way out of the doctor's strangle hold and. 
Пед the apartment. 

Meanwhile, Rosemary McKinnon, 
now discreetly covered by a robe, had 
escaped to the outside hallway, where 
she waited for an clevator to take her to 
the main lobby and safety. Just as the 
elevator stopped, Melendez leaped into 
the car with her. They tussled. He 
nicked her under the breast with the 
knife. At the third floor, the elevator 
came to a d M McKinnon ran 
ovt and down the fire escape. By the 
time the police arrived, Melendez had 
vanished, 


time he s 
prone pos 
gavotte, whe 


his 
Melendez standing on 


E 

The phone call that gets me out of bed 
on Friday, December 12, comes from 
Dennis Rubini, who teaches a cou 
alternative lifestyles at a Ph 
university. Rubini has | 


арма 
ident of 


Philadel phi. ice and 
is active in a sadom: "conscious- 
aising" grou it 1 


seen the morning One of the sus- 
pects, he reports, has surrendered. He 
doesn't know which one. 

“I hope the cops will stop hassling us 
now," Rubini grumbk 
homosexual population of Philadelp! 

He goes on to complain that he hii 
self was picked up by the police because 
he resembled a sketch of one of the 
wanted шеп. 

“They took me to Homicide. One of 
the detectives noticed a bulge in my 
pocket and thought it might be a gun. 
Instead, he found a copy of Larry Town- 
send's The Leatherman's Handbook, a 


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for double stitches at the legs, the 
pockets, the yoke. Extra thread to rivet 
belt loops and pocket edges. Anda 
heavyweight brass zipper to cope with 
your many ups and downs. 

If you find all these features in one 
Pair of jeans, try them on for size. We 
bet instead of your usual choice, 
you'll be in a pair of Big Smiths. 

Big Smith makes casual, 
western, and work jeans as 
strong as they are good looking. 


It takes more than good looks to make great western and work wea 


225 


PLAYBOY 


226 


If you're rich enough 
to pay $9 for your Scotch, 
you're smart enough 
not to have to. 


VAT 69 GOLD. 
IF YOU DON'T MIND PAYING LESS. 


manual on sadism and masochism. The 
officer said, ‘Ob, my daughter's interested 
in leather handiwork, too,’ and handed 
the book back to me. 

"Then the cops fingerprinted me, 
photographed me and subjected me to 
polygraph test. They wanted 10 know if 
I had exer engaged in 'abnormal sex." 

“I asked them what they meant by 
abnormal sex. I said, ‘My definition of 
abnormal or society's definition?’ They 
were stumped. They let it fly. Anyway, I 
passed the polygraph and they very 
politely thanked me for my time and 
trouble; 


. 

The man who surrendered was Steven 
Maleno. The night before (after Inspec- 
tor Golden released. the suspects name 
to the press), Maleno telephoned police. 
Shortly after, he met a team of detectives 
in Center City and v n to Homi- 
cide. Later, his wife appeared. She said 
she had been separated from the trigger- 
tempered Maleno for the past sev 1 
months, She tried to see him at Homicide 
but was told she couldn't. She told re 
porters that her husband was ап unem- 
ployed sheet-metal worker 

. 


At the arraignment room of police 
headquarters, а cop warns a United 
Press photographer that he is not to take 
photos inside the courtroom, Neverthe 
less, the photographer hunches near an 
elevator, four yards away from a gate 
that separates free men from confined. 1 
stand near the photographer, hoping to 
get a glimpse of Maleno as he enters the 
courtroom. 

After a short wait, the elevator door 
opens. Flashes pop, momentarily blind- 
ing the accused, He squints, lowers his 
eyes to the floor. Two burly officers guard 
him—bookends on each side. A reporter, 
who obviously has seen The Front Page 
too many times, gets close and blurts, 
"Did you kill John Knight?" Maleno 
and bookends keep moving. 

In the courtroom, the judge asks 
Maleno if he has an attorney, then tells 
the prisoner that he will be held without 
bail. 

Maleno looks as if he's been hit by 
bulldozer. He is clad in a raincoat that's 
been through hurricanes, Tan slacks in 
need of pressing peek out from the bot- 
tom of the coat. The unshaven face of a 
streetwise punk sticks out from the top. 


Sign this document,” says the judge. 
"I can't,” snaps Maleno, eying his 
handcuffs. 


An officer removes the manacles and 
Maleno signs the paper. On his way out, 
the full press brigade follows and fash- 
bulbs sn: if the queen mother were 
g town, But this time Mal 
stares straight ahead, 

“Who killed John Knight?" asks the 
Hildy Johnson type. 

“Со fuck yourself,” spits Maleno as the 


v 


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227 


now that you know the way!” 


ger, 


“Don't bea stran 


PLAYBOY 


228 


Rally shines deep 
because it cleans deep. 


“Rally” car wax gives you the deep, rich-looking 
shine you want because it cleans deep down, gets 
up even tough, oily road film as you wax. 

Space-age silicones make “Rally” 
incredibly quick and easy to use. 

And they make "Rally" every bit as 
weather-proof and detergent-proof as 
old-fashioned paste waxes. 

Test drive it. 


clevator door slams in the reporter's face 

Outside the arraignment room, with 
Maleno’s invective still hanging in the 
air, word filters out to the press that 
Melendez, too, is dead. His bullet ridden 
body has been found near the site of a 
boy-scout reservation in Camden 

Melendez and Knight: the hustler and 
the heir. The day before, 1 hadn't heard 
of either of them, much less of the Me 
Kinnons, Maleno and Soli. Suddenly, 1 
find the Knig 
my life. 

That evening, I check the [ourstar 
specials at the Warwick's newsstand. 
Melendez’ face is splattered all over the 
Pages. “KNIGHT SUSPECT SHOT TO DEATH: 
BODY FOUND IN JERSEY.” For some strange 
reason, an old song recorded by Lee 
Wiley rings through my head: 


ht case the focal point of 


Love laughs at a king, 
Kings don't mean a thing, 
On the street of dreams. 

. 

Monday, December 15. The Philadel- 
phia News and Inquirer building is with- 
in walking distance of City Hall, my 
geographical point of reference in the 
city of brotherly turmoil, On the edi- 
torial floor of the News, a police radio 
blares and ten phones ring at once. 
“There's no one in the sports depart- 
ment,” grumbles a reporter 10 one of 
the phone receivers. Then she yells, 
“Who are you waiting for?” 

“Paul Janensch,” I answer, 

“In there.” She points to an office. 

Janensch is in his mid-30s. He looks 
like he loves the great indoors: That 
gray-pink pallor that comes from too 
much time spent under fluorescent light- 
ing is a color common to editors. Horn- 
rimmed glasses are perched on the bridge 
of his nose. He leans back in his swivel 
chair, hands behind his head, and snaps 
that he ha 
there is to 
Knight at L 
our cover 

I answer, 

“Well, th 
redundant. The meal was one of the 
most pleasant I've had in a long time. It 
lasted four hours. John selected the 
wines. The wine tab alone came to a 
hundred and fourteen dollars, The Mc- 
Kinnons were good company.” 

Did Janensch have any idea of 
Knight's sexual orientation? 

“You mean did I suspect that John 
was gay? No, I didn't, There was never а 
thought in my mind about John’s being 
homosexual—that night or ever. Гус 
worked closely with him. Оп two occa- 
sions, I had bumped into him so 


already said probably all 
y about his last supper with 
Truffe. “Have you read 


very last word of it.” 
. anything | tell you is 


ly— 
cach time with a different. woman. I 
always saw him with people from the 
straight world. Everybody who knew 
John thought he was totally straight. We 
were utterly amazed at these revelations.” 

All along, Knight kept a low profile at 


DID YOU HEAR THE ONE ABOUT 
THE TRAVELING SALESMAN WHO HAS 
774,000 MILES ON HIS VOLVO? 


It’s no joke. owners of 48 new models from G.M., Ford, 

Back in 1965, Norbert O. Lyssy,a travel- Chrysler апа АМС? 

ing salesman from Texas bought a Volvo We can't guarantee that their Volvos will 

1800 S for his work. Since then, hes driven it last 774,000 miles. 

through deserts and over mountains an But if Mr. Lyssys experience is any 

average of 70,000 miles a year. indication, these new Volvo owners have a 
When Mr. Lyssy isnt working, he uses his lot of happiness to look forward to. 

Volvo for fun. On weekends, it lugs a 16-foot ‘Sumer conducted among owners of new cars bousl in Max: 1977 

power boat through the mountains to the ESE 

Lyssys favorite lake. 

In all this time, Mr. Lyssy says, “Old Red 
(as he affectionately calls his Volvo) has 
never failed to get me to my destination.” He 
adds, “I think shell reach a million miles 
with ease. After all, I only have 226,000 
more miles to go.” 

It’s fair to say Mr. Lyssy is happy with 
that old Volvo of his. But that’s an old Volvo. 
What about people who buy new Volvos? 

According to an independent nationwide 
survey, theyre happy too. Happier than the 


VOLVO. A CAR YOU CAN BELIEVE IN. " 


“Respect you? If you really want to know, Miss Sax 
you a hell of 2 lot more than I did before. 


а by, I respect 
к E 


the News, Had Janensch been unaware 

Gly NS ily contione You can tell alot about an individual by what he pours into his glass. 
he'd still have spotted. money. Not that 

Knight was throwing it around—he 

wasn't ostentatious—but often the work- 

ing rich are twice as conscientious as 

the working middle class. They have to 

prove that they deserve their jobs in 

spite of their inherited status. 

“John often worked fourteen-hour 
shifts. If a big story came his way, he 
kept his cool. He could handle it 

His nose for news, in Janensch’s opin- 
ion, could eventually have made him the 
bona fide successor to Granddad Knight 
(John's father had died in World V 
Two combat two weeks before his son's 
birth) despite nepotism. Like the old 

John’s views didn't. particularly 
follow a straight line. He was Гог abo 
tion, but also for capital punishment 

the Vietnam war but 

As far a 

the gay issue is concerned, journalisti- 
ly, he kept away from it 


Janensch, 

ble gay life here in Philadelphia, one 
that is not especially kinky. And w 
sympathetic to the demands of these gay 
groups. We offer them maximum oppor- 
tunity to tell their side of the story 

“This gay-movement stuff wasn't 
John's territory to cover. Jt wasn't an 
issue. However, I think if John's gı 
father discovered his tendencies, he'd 
certainly be upset, but I doubt if he'd do 
anything drastic. Hed probably want to 
help John and send him to a psycho- 
analys 

I leave Janensch’s office wondering 
why 1 didn't tell him Fm gay. Why 
shouldn't he know it Or is what 1 do in 
bed irrelevant in matters outside? Per- 
haps a homosexual's skin should be a 
different color. Lavender for immediate 
identification. Would it have changed 
matters any had Janensch and his co- 
workers known about Knight? Does the 
sound of money in conjunction with 
clout and power negate one's sexual ori 
entation? Do intelligence, а low profile 
and playing it cool make one acceptable? 
What if Knight were lavender? Knights 
lile—and death—is getting to me. 

That afternoon, | meet Jim Kennedy 
at the Назу Гаму. Kennedy calls himsel 
а gay street priest who ministers to 
hustlers.” His ministry is in the Northern 
Liberty area, where he lives with five 
young men on a $2000 grant from the 
city drug program. 

Kennedy knew Melendez | slightly. 
Sometimes hed bump into him and 
Knight cating breakfast at the Hasty- 
Tasty. “but to say 1 knew Felix real well 
would be a lie. Everybody's saying tha 
Irs like right alter Martin Luther King 
assassination, everyone swore he knew = 
Kin т Bishi, 

Nevertheless, Kennedy has theories, Sep у 
He maintains that you must understand ‘The Novelist” glass created for the Bushmills Collection by Henry Halem Soe 
A blend of 100% Irish Whiskies 86 Proof. Bored in Leland. The Jos. Garneau Ca. NewYork. N Y ©1975 


PLAYBOY 


32 


about class differences in order to under- 
nd the phenomenon of hustlers. The 
majority are working class, They come 
from broken homes and their feelings 
have been brutalized 
elix was typical of the gang that 
works the street, He came from a Pente- 
costal background and the church is anti 
gay. Felix had а multiple number of 
oppressions working against hir 
gion, sexual orientation, class 
Puerto Rican minority status.” 
Oppression makes curious bedfellows, 
and it seemed only logical that fate 
bring Melendez together with 


nd his 


would 
Knight. 

Knight sought out the street kid, the 
outcast, the sexual heathen, the earth 
child whose universe was entirely diffe 
ent from his, With Knight, sex was al- 
ways а mater of cultural collision. 
“Diametrically opposed" was a figure of 
speech that could elicit a hard-on. He 
could neve the umbilical cord 
that bound him to a patriarchal society. 
Cut it and there was the possibility of 
Grandpa's cutting him oll. To go visibly 
айты it would be 10 go against every- 
thing he was ev wht im all those 
fancy schools. For Knight to accept what 
he was meant that he might not be 
accepted. by the hierarchy who expected 


tog 


sever 


greatness of him. Greatness meant 
strength. Strength meant masculinity. 


Masculinity meant heterosexuality, Нес 
crosexualiy ment façade. Maintain 
fagade for the world to sec. Cheat in the 
rk abyss of the soul. Cheat in 
lighted back yard. 


Of course, there's no telling what 
might have been had Knight played. in 
another yard. Impossible i0 surmise 
whether he'd meet his hearts desire on 
the Main Line or if he'd find a Felix 
Melendez on Society Hill. 

The wuth is, when you're rich and 
bothered and restless, a hustler is easier 
to cope with than a sit-down dinner for 
six. And with the help of a few select 
publications, 

Hustlers who advertise in The Adzo- 
cate (the largest gay publication in the 
re lik g nurses. Many are 
kids who need the bucks to get 
them through school. Others are actors 
1 d ^t hold steady jobs 
because they need time for auditions. 
Still others are lazy and find whoring a 
way to pay the rent. And there are others 
with great. bodies who love sex, perforn 
well and figure they might as well cash 
in on their hobby. Thev sit at home, wait 
for the phone to ring and charge the 
oing rate. Most male models are g 

ul claim to be "vers i 
way of meeting interesting me 
wouldn't ordinarily meet. A good model 
not bothered by the age, weight, height 
or kinky demands of his cl 
honest: а veritable boy scout. 

The street hustler 1 
of it. There's no telephone, no way of 
screening the crazies, no way of spot 
Lily Law in plain clothes. The pay i 
bad. A kid сап freeze his ass off on a 
winter night and go home with ten dol- 
lars for a blow job. Generally, street 
hustlers are sexually passive. And they're 


ncers who ca 


ile. 


“Beverly, 1 thought we agreed there would be none of 
that except during commercials and official time outs!” 


you 
ping 

Melendez was the classi 
ter, Knight the dassie John. Though 
opposites on the socioeconomic scale, 
they shared the same patriarchal burden. 
And little by little, Felix had fallen in 
Jove with his John. 


than the house models. Pill pop- 
nd heroin are part of the scene. 
street hus- 


. 

Through the years, stories have been 
written comparing the elder Knight to 
Joseph. Kennedy. Although tragedy fol- 
lowed Knight all his life the way tire 
tracks follow а Cadillac down a muddy 
bility is his middle name. Still, 

n eraser in his head and can 

obliterate the past at will. But first he 
has to know it all. 

Knight has just returned to his office 
at the Akron Beacon Journal—the first 
newspaper in his chain and still his 
home base—and getting through to him 
on the phone is easy. A secretary answers 
and suggests that I tell her what the 
call is about. "He's busy now," she says. 
"III tell him." 

An hour later, Knight phones back. 
His opening words are, "I'm gunshy. 
ve talked to Newsweek and Time 
and been misquoted,” he continues. 
“To discuss my relationship with my 
grandson is still painful. 

Nevertheless, he states that young 
ohn was an excellent newsman, "No 
doubt about that.” And that he knows 
his grandson was liked both personally 
ly. Had he lived, his c 
would have been a brilliant one. 
We had a close relationship, John 
and I—a close and warm relationship. 
We understood cach other and were on 
the best of terms, There were no difer- 
any differences. And 1 have 
rimination about any of what 
ppened. 

After John’s death, I spent three 
ys in solitary at Massachusetts General 
Hospital, thinking over every aspect of 
his life as it applied to me. There is 
nothing that I would have done differ- 
ently. No changes ГӘ have made.” 

1 ask if he'll sec me, if only ıo remi- 
nisce about his grandson's life, as op- 
posed to the circumstances surrounding 
his de 

"Re 


and profession 


ге 


ng our relations 
nful" he repeats. 


p would be 
Em alr 


not," 
In the late spring o£ 1976, I phone him 


he refuses to be 
ath 


But once à 
interviewed at any le 
"Let me just reiterate that stories about 
my late grandson's wealth are greatly ex- 
aggerated. Ollicially, he was not the heir. 
That had been reported erron 
John held some stock, which I gave to 
him, but we're a corporation and a man 
has to earn his own way in the business. 

Despite Grandpa's protest, unofficially 
there was never John was 
the heir or th: ng groomed 


ously. 


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PLAYBOY 


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the next Citizen Knight, Had his abili- 
ties swayed toward the business end of 
journalism, he'd have been shipped oft 
to Miami, because The Miami Herald is 
the best school for learning the corporate 
aspects of journalism. Since signs of 
printers ink had flowed through 
veins, the master plan had been to send 
young John to Detroit after his gradua- 
tion from Harvard. There, the corpo 

tion could find out if he was a good 
reporter. At The Detroit Free Press, he'd 
have to produce, He could also learn 
the ropes, from paper routing to adver- 
ising. Once schooled, he would be trans- 
ferred to Philadelphia, where the two 
Knight Ridder papers are the best train- 
ing grounds for xecutive edito 


or 


y strong, Grandfather Knight took 
the role of father almost from the mo- 
ment John was born, leaving his mother 
а sort of subordinate figure who went 
along with decisions regarding the m. 
ter plan. Grandfather responsible 
for sending John away from home to 
school when he was moderately young. 
for pu his ear about Ox- 
ford and Harvard. 

А pesimist would think that the bu 
den of tradition would drive a kid up 
wall, but John III adored, coddled 

ed his grandfather. “He 
ich time he talked about the old m: 
newspaper chum, “but I think he 
deep penetrating anger and hate 
toward him, He was desperately afraid 


nd 
nuflected 


of his grandfather, He was afraid of do- 
ing wrong, afraid of his wrath and dis- 
pleasure.” Patricide was the name of the 


game. Or, to be exact, grandpatricide. 

Ironically, most people who know the 
elder Knight claim he would not have 
been vindictive had John confessed his 
homosexual feelings. If young John had 
a reasonable adul 
other man, it’s un 


But John 
ng with street kids. Boy or girl 
(uation was a flammable one. 
Too much w - A scandal of the 
chicken ha alfect the cor- 
future 
pire. No way would G 
approve. 


А 
December 1. They've sei 
Sol 


ed Salvatore 
i. 1 think if 1 were Soli, ГА 
ге Med to Miami, too. The weather 
chilly in Philly, Frigid, I read Sol 
story and decide to call my parents 
a m near Palm 
Th 

sunburn, sw the pool. They want to 
know what I'm up to. I ask if th 
been anything about Soli's capture in the 
Flo pers. My father tells me he's 
heard about the limes. He suggests 
that 1 move from my dump in Manhat- 
tan. If I can't afford the rent in а good 


au 
Beach. 
y beg me to visit them, get a little 


high-rise, he'll help me out. 
Parents, commitments, obligatior 


г the grown son | 
ans and I 


casi 
1 of his philandering, with 
his arrest record. and track marks, was 
still closer to his mother than С 
to Philly. Mom 
her son every day. 


orp! 
Soli, with 


no matter where he 


was, He hadn't called since the Knight 
murder, 


What could be more natural 
r Antoinette Soli to go on televi- 
Salvi, please come home 
or get in touch with me. Let me know 
ht. You may be dead like 
y Felix Melende. 
ugh the magic of the media 
ids her son that she is critically 
g suffered a massive heart attack 
before. “The operation 
nsuccesslul, she weeps. “They 

expect me to live more than a 


At Chock Full o' Nuts, where I wait 
for friend to meet me. Mrs. `$ 
anguished face leaps out from the pages 
of the News. A hooker on the next stool 
reads the article with relish. 

"He should be in a mental institu 
tion," she says to the counterwoman, 
he aggravation hes giving his poor 
other. 
She puts down her Ne 
they're giving a reward, 


“I wonder if 
she says to no 


icular. She orders another cof- 


one 


fe 


Lighe” 
Two of he 


cohorts enter the place. 
One is a Katy Jurado look-alike who 
glances at Soli's picture. 

“He looks familiar. Cute,” she says- 

“Just caught," says the first hooker 
k they're 
ирет the 
for nothing. Wouldn't you 
atm 

"No," I answer. "Not for nothing." I 
make a mental note to check the mirror 
to sce if my skin has turned lavender. 

. 

As it happened, there was no rew: 
li was turned in by a woman i 
he had taken up with 
blonde “burlesque dance 
protect herself, By the time the whole 
story of Soli's and Maleno's actions after 
the murder finally was pieced together 
from trials, news accounts and personal 
interviews, it read like a James M. Cain 
novel. What started out as а simple rip- 
olf ended wp as a sordid melodrama 
starring smalltime characters in an out- 
of-control plot. The melodrama also fea- 
tured the murder of Felix Melendez, 
y Knight's apartment, Soli 
and Maleno checked into à motel in New 
They summoned Melendez, de 
g to know why he had run amuck 


ward. I'd do it with him 
She looks 


t did you kill h al 
I ought to kill you now. Did 
t McKinnon broad, too? You 


t you? What the fuck hap- 


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did, did 


was panicstricken. He had just 
ıl that lie knew nothin; 


y caught by his teacher in 
way out was to ‘Less up. 


g John's apartment and she 
1, hollering. She grabbed 
me. I stabbed her. I was scared.” 

"Don't tell us eno. 
“What happened? Why did you stab t 
we ant” 
Felix rasped, “I'm telling the truth. I 
stabbed her in the clev 
hand. 
her. 

Stev 


nd cut her 


to kill 


That's the truth 
continued to interrogate. 
They battered Felix with queries and ac- 
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his answers. Crazy with anger, Steve the 

took a butcher knife and sliced Felix’ 
head. Blood gushed. It trickled down his 
onto his coat, onto the couch. But 
held in the pain, fearing that the 
мем provocation would start Maleno 


and Steve shut themselves 
into the kitcheneue area. "What are we 
going to do demanded 


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Steve. "We can't trust him. He knows too 
much. What should we do? Leave the 
country? Leave the state? Keep running?" 

"The men decided that the logical move 
would be to Пес. But first they watched 
the 11-›.м. television newscast. Though 
not named. Soli, Melendez and Maleno 
were described, down to the track marks 
on Soli's arm, courtesy of Rosemary Mc 
Kinnon's amazing memory. It was 
other twinge of pain in the onge 
nightmare for all of them. 

Toward midnight, they left the motel 
After a couple of hours of driving, they 
ched a deserted arca near Camden. 
stopped at a dead end 
id, "We've got to bury this shii 
and he and Felix got out of the car. 
They headed toward а wooded area 
Steve carried a bag containing coats, 
dungarees, shirts and shoes that they had 
worn when they ripped oll Knight's 
apartment, as well as blood-soaked towels 
from Felix’ head wound. Both Steve and 
Felix started digging a hole in which to 
dispose of the мий. But Steve started 
again. “Why did you kill that man?” 

He pulled a gun from the waist of his 
pants. And fired point-blank at Felix’ 
face. Felix fell. Leaning over him, Steve 
fired two more shots. 

Hurricdly, he took the bag with the 
garments and returned to the car, Less 
than a mile away, he dumped the cloth- 
ing into a suburban garbage can. Then 
he dismantled the gun and, piece by 
piece, tossed it out the car window. Par- 
ticles of the weapon became part of the 
New Jersey landscape. 

Fearing that he'd become part of the 
landscape himself, Soli decided to split 
from. Maleno. Maleno returned to Phila- 
delphia. Three days later, he surren- 
dered. Soli drove to Miami. He dyed his 
hair strawberry blond, cut off his mus- 
tache and took up with a blonde bomb- 
shell. The bombshell turned him in. 

. 
. He dated a few, but 
Many of his dates worked 


“Women? Sui 
no one heavi 
at the paper. 

The speaker is Ladd Neuman, Knight's 
editor at The Detroit Free Press. He's 
talking about the straight side of 
Knight's sex life. 

“Did they come back the morning after 
and discuss John's prowess?” I ask. 

"No," replies Neuman. “He dated 
them like friends, which is to say that 
he'd take them out to a show and that's 
it. John's women were two types: the 
Detroit Free Press kind, who were safe 
acquaintances, and the women he didn't 
know and would screw around with. 
Those he called foxes or foxy chicks. 
Hed brag about how great they 
she had a hell of a body’ or 
“She was good in bed. 

Did John ever say what he did in bed? 
Neumin's face grows pensive, as if he's 
wying to reconstruct a scene that hap- 
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he lights on the scene and remarks that 
John was never specific as to whether his 
ste ran to oral or anal or sel-abuse or 
I or fetishism or whatever, but there 
was a woman who worked in the mayor's 
office, who once said something. 

"This was a real lik 

Neuman. "She was a free-spirited woman 
who was nicknamed Miss 
of a zipper dress she had that came olt 
easily. When 1 knew her, she was mak- 
ing it with someone at the burcau and 
driving him out of his mind. She'd talk 
very freely about her sex life, too. Well, 
onc day she came in and said she was 
‘freaked out! I asked why. "Well, she 
said, "E made it with John last night. 
And 1 said, ‘You did? What about your 
other friend? She answered, ‘Actually, 
John's a better fuck than my other 
friend.’ I then asked if she was going 
back for more. ‘No,’ she said, ‘because I 
sort of felt like one of his possessions. I 
got freaked out by being shown every- 
thing in his apartment, from his stereo 
to his etchings.” 
“Because of that kind of feedback, I 
never suspected John had a homosexual 
street Ше. 1 just thought he was kind of 
stuck on himself. 1 assumed he wasn't 
letting women get close to him because 
of his money, but I remember thinking 
that its still odd. Why didn't he ever 
good, heavy, long-term rom: 
What the hell was h 
Was he hurt in the past? Every now and 
then, he'd mention some girl in London 
whom he chimed he was pining for. 
That nten herself 
married to someone else. 

"Now, if vou sit and talk with some of 
the Free Press reporters, they'll tell vou, 
‘I thought maybe John was gay because 
he dressed too macho or something like 
that. Shit, I knew John better than any- 
body in Detroit, and I didn't know his 
secret. In fact, the one or two times that 
I had any reason to suspect anything, I 
kicked those reasons off becuse John 
was coming on so strong with the foxy- 
chick rap. He'd constantly barrage me in 
а kind of locker-room way about the new- 
est girl in town. 

"One night, we went to what was De- 
trois rowdiest, raunchiest topless go-go 
joint, the Golddiggers Lounge. We drank 
ourselves blind and closed the place. 
John kept trying to put the make on one 
of the waitresses. She wouldn't go along 
y left the bar, and 
John spotted this same waitress outside 
and took off after her. I figured he was 
going to get himself in trouble, be 
cause you don't run. up to someone in 
the street in Detroit at two-thiny in the 
morning, no matter who ye 

“John talked to her like à Dutch uncle 
She was really dynamite—not too 
bright—and the next thing 1 knew, she 
was walking back to John's car. Later, I 
asked him how he finally managed, after 


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239 


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having failed to entice the waitress in the 
bar. He said he told her he had a great 
record collection and a terrific stereo.” 

. 

Knight's secret diaries have been held 
by the police since his murder and my 
chances of learning what's in them have 
been slim until I make the right connec- 
tion. 

"The detective suggests that I stay away 
from headquarters. He asks where I'm 
calling from. I tell him I'm at a phonc 
booth near the Troc Burlesque Theater. 
I also tell him who my contact is. He 
says he's been waiting for my call. I 
know this is as close as I'm going to get 
to Knight's diaries. 

An hour later, he pulls up and 
beckons me into his car. Cramped in the 
back seat is a dog of unspecified breed, 
probably a bastard relative of the family 
that carries whiskey to lost skiers in the 
Alps. The animal is cither on Valium ог 
three steps from death. It hardly moves. 
The detective calls it Ruth. Definitely 
not watchdog material. 

Ruth and I have something in com- 
mon: Neither of us stirs as the detective 
drives us to an area of Philadelphia com- 
pletely alien to me. He pulls to a stop, 
pats Ruth's head and says, "We won't 
be long, girl." The detective and I enter 
a restaurant decorated in early Signund 
Romberg. We take a corner booth. 

“Let's talk about the diaries," I say. 
Let's look at the menu first," he says. 

We order Scotch straight and settle 
for Wiener schnitzel, The drink takes a 
long time in coming. 

“What, specifically, do you want to 
know? 

"Everything. Were the entries daily?" 

"Daily for maybe a one- or two-week 
period. Then Knight would stop for 
three. Then there'd be Saturday, Sunday, 
Monday—that kind of thing. Some of 
the entries were short. Like, ‘Start work- 
ing more.’ ‘Start straightening things 
out.” Most of them were about feelings. 
He'd write about sex, reacting positively 
to a good sexual encounter with a wom- 
an. That would make him happy. But 
then he'd write about a homosexual ex- 
perience and he'd write with obviously 
more. 

“Soul-searching?" I offer. 

"No. Not soul-searching. If he had a 
really terrific homosexual experience, 
he'd describe it in much more glowing 
kinds of enjoyment terms. The descrip- 
tion of heterosexual relationships that 
were successful, I guess, made him proud, 
or bootstrapped him into a sense of ‘I'm 
on the right road now.’ And yet the 
homosexual experiences were more ful- 
filling to him from the standpoint of 
emotions,” 

“Were they strictly blow jobs, pardon 
the expression?” 

The detective laughs. "The expression 
is pardoned,” he says. "In polite circles, 
we call it fellatio, No. Not strictly blow 


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242 


jobs at all, though blow jobs seemed to 
be, according to Knights entries, the 
most titillating experience of all.” 
ione to him?" 
o. That he did." 
scinating." 
“Yeah. Fellatio that he did.” 
“Did Knight discuss his homosexuality 
at length in the diarie: 
“He talked about homosexual exper 
ences and how cuphoric he had been ii 


overcame, rather than accept as part of 
one’s make-up. I know for people like 
you it’s fine, but for this poor t was 
death. It is fine with you, isn't i 
105 fine with me.” 

"When he was drunk, he'd often go 
out to Rittenhouse Square or Spruce 
Street and pick up some kid. He'd wake 
up the next morning and give the guy 
a hundred dollars and tell him to get 
lost. Melendez was never fully accepting 
of that from the start. He didn't like the 
idea of being rejected that way. Melen- 
dez tried to make contact with him. Bas 
cally, John didn't want to have anything 
to do with him. In his sober or lucid 
moments, John was ashamed of Melen- 
dez. That offended the kid. I'm not say- 
ing that that motivated Melendez to 
intentionally go out and get Knight. 
But if you accept the proposition that 


Melendez killed Knight, it explains the 
rage that would instill in Melendez the 
urge to kill." 

"You were in Knight's apartment. You 

worked on the case," 1 ce they 
won't be bringing it up in court, can 
you tell me exactly what was found in 
ight's foot locker?” 
About three hundred dollars’ worth 
of pornographic books and commercial 
movies, the cight-millimeter vari 
None of it was homemade, in the sense 
that it was filmed by Knight. It was the 
мий you buy in pornographic shops. A 
lot of hard-core pornographic books, 
most of them homosexual, Somewhat 
ironically, some old childhood books. 
The kind of books that a kid has when 
And the diaries.” 


me were found, but not in the 
foot locker. They were found in suit 
piled up next to the door. It looked like 
somebody intended to haul the sex toys 
out of there as part of the loot. In one 
of the suitcases was а couple of double- 
ended dildos. No leather or whips or 
handcuffs or cat-o-ninczails. 

“Different people take diflerent views 
about Knight's ap: I maintain 
that you could visit his place and never 
know that it was the home of a homo- 
sexual Maybe I'm mot sophisticated 
enough to know.” 

“Get off it. You're too sophis 


tment. 


ety. ^ 


“Thanks. Other people have said you 
could tell it was a homosexual’s quarters 
from the artwork. There was a Japanese 
print in one of the bathrooms—an ex- 
plicit sexual scene. Some detectives con- 
cluded, from the painting, that the guy 
ed men. I remember going through 
the apartment with a couple of cops and 
they were examining the ceiling very 
closely to check if there had ever been a 
mirror on it. It tickled the hell out of 

nc. Totally unrealistic. Sure, there were 

mirrors in the gymnasium where he 
worked out—but what does that tell? 
One of our men thought he might have 
another pad somewhere. A ‘trick’ apart- 
ment. No such thing. 

"Knights apartment got a good 
thorough overhaul. After sifting through 
his possessions, I realized that there w; 
no damn underwear, anywhere. I said, 
"Wait a minute. This is not re Then 
we found out that most of Knights stuff 
was at the laundry." 

гаг underwear? 
.” He grins. "Doesn't everybody? 


He doesn't answer, either, but 1 can 
sec he docs. 


D 

Knight's last rites took place at the 
Suiffler-Hamby Mortuary in Columbus, 
Georgia, his home town. Columbus 


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man blessed by birth, circumstances and 
family. A young man with God-given 
gi The minister explained that 
there is a sense of unreality, that this 
man's passing is a bad dream. But it is 
reality. And our first thought is, Why? 1 
can't answer. I can only comfort.” 

In the vestibule, police made copies 
of the 500 or so signatures in the chapel 
guest book. After the service, mourners 
went by car to Parkhill Cemetery nearby. 
Knight's grandfather remained in his 
automobile. His widowed mother, Doro- 
thy, stood silently as the coffin was 
lowered. A local television-news team 
filmed the rites from a hilly point over- 
looking the gravesite. A wireservice 
photographer moved among the mourn- 
ers below. 


. 

In Philadelphia, plans are made to 
bury Melendez. Three days after Knight 
is laid to rest, a service is held for Felix 
at the Pullo Funeral Home in South 
Philadelphia. 

The crowd there is small. No TV 
cameras, no media monitors visible out- 
side the parlor, despite the fact that this 
is the most publicized murder case in 
Philadelphia history. | nod solemnly at 
the pomaded mortician's aide at the 
door. He g s for me to sign the 
guest book. I don't—instead, I find a 
scat near the back of the parlor. 


The mourners are mostly young girls 
in miniskirts, craggy-aced mommas, 
babies and teenage boys with long eye. 
lashes and Philadelphia Flyers jackets. 
They occupy 20 rows of bridge chairs, 
which come to a halt a yard from the 
casket 

Sobbing everywhere. A young girl 
whimpers and a baby cries and another 
girl cries and another. Who are they? 
Friends of Felix'? 

They make me feel out of place and 
1 ат out of place, conspicuous to myself 
because I shouldn't be here; somewhat 
guiltridden because I am here. Interest- 
ing that I should feel this way among 
Mclendez acquaintances. Interesting that 
I can move comfortably, snug in the 
fact that I'm doing my professional duty, 
among Knight's peers. 

I notice a plainclothesman from police 
headquarters, He notices me, too, but 
he averts his eyes from mine. Another 
intruder. "Thank the Lord. 

The place soon fills to capacity. From 
where I sit, it's difficult to see Melendez’ 
death face in the open coffin. There is 
a line of 15 people waiting to get a view. 
One of the viewers is a repeater. I get in 
line. 

Moving to the coffin is a slow process. 
Once there, the procedure is to look at 
the body for as long as you want, then 
get back to your seat or leave the parlor. 
Most of the viewers sneak a quick glance. 


One viewer gazes and prays for what 
seems an hour. The line in back of me 
is long 

My turn. The coffin is plushed up with 
white satin. Melendez clad in a tan sum- 
mer suit. Long and lanky. Tic tied in 
a tight Windsor knot. Hands folded 
across his chest. Hair slicked back. The 
cosmetician has done a remarkable job 
of hiding whatever damage the bullet 
wounds had done to his countenance. 
Felix looks like a waxwork of Rudolph 
Valentino. He sports а half-smile. Or is 
it a silent snicker? 

Enough. My eyes shift to his shoes. 

heap, with those tiny ventilation air 
Heels in А-1 condition, Big fect. 
No sign of socks. 

Below his feet rests a pretty heart- 
shaped bouquet of white gladioli. Tied 
to the bouquet is a card. The card reads, 
pApby. That's all. DADDY. 

The gladioli and the pAppv card are 
buried with Felix. 


Steve Maleno pleaded. guilty to the 
murders of John Knight and Felix Me- 
lendez. Salvatore Soli pleaded innocent 
to both murders, stood trial in Philadel- 
phia and Camden and was found guilty 
of first-degree murder on both counts. 
Both Soli and Maleno are serving life 


sentences. 


243 


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PLAYBOY 


246 atrical wink. 


FALLING ANGEL 


(continued from page 192) 


“She stiffened. It was as if someone touched the 
back of her neck with an ice cube.” 


I grinned and sniffed my drink. “Must 
be swell having so many memories. 

“You writin’ a book, son? I can spot 
me a book writer quick as a fox recog- 
nizes a hen." 

“You're close, old fox. I'm wor 
a piece for Look magazine.” 

“A story ‘bout Toots in Look? Right in 
there with Doris Day! Haw!” 

“Well, I won't put you on, Toots. The 
story's going to be about Johnny Fave 
ite.” 

"Who?" 

“A crooner. Used to sing with Spider 
Simpson's swing band back in the early 
Forties.” 

"Yeah. I remember Spider. He played 
the drums like two jackhammers fuck- 
ing.” 

“What do youremember about Johnny 
Favorite?" I asked. “I heard you were 
pretty good pals,” 

“Son, he made a record of one of my 
songs way back when and I thank him 
for all the longgone royalty checks, but 
he sure didn't come uptown to sce me.” 

“Who did he come uptown to see?" 

Toots Sweet ducked his eyes in mock 
coyishness. “You gettin’ me to tell tales 
out of school, son.” 

“What does it matter after all these 
years?” I said. "I gather he was seeing a 
lady." 

“She was every inch a lady, to be sure.” 

“Tell me her nam 

"It ain't no secret. Anyone who was 
around ‘fo’ the war knows Evangeline 
Proudfoot was makin’ the scene with 
Johnny Favorite.” 

“None of the downtown press seemed 
to know.” 

“Son, if you was crossin’ the line in 
them days, it wasn't something you 
wanted to brag about.” 

“Who was Evangeline Proudfoot? 

Toots smiled. "A beautiful, strong. 
West Indian woman," he said. "She was 
ten, fifteen years older than Johnny, but 
still such а fox that he was the one 
looked the fool.” 

"Know where І could get in touch with 
her?" 

"Ain't seen Evangeline in years. She 
got ill. Store's still there, so maybe she is, 
too. 

"What sort of store was that?" I did 
my best to keep any trace of cop out of 
my question. 

"Evangeline had an herb shop over on 
Lenox. Stayed open till midnight every 
day "cept Sunday." Toots gave me a the- 
“Time to play some то". 


ing on 


You gonna stick around for another set, 
son?" 
“TI be back,” Ts: 


. 

Proudfoot Pharmaceuticals was located 
on the northwest corner of Lenox Ауе- 
nue and 123rd Street. The name hung 


in the window in s ch bluce-ncon 
script. I parked half a block down and 
looked the place over. Fluorescent lights 
hung from a pressed-tin ceiling; old- 
fashioned glass-fronted wooden shelves 
ran along the far p of a 
dock pendulum seemed the only activity. 

1 went inside. A smell of burning in- 
cense stung the air. Bells tinkled above 
my head as I shut the door. On a revoly- 
ing metal stand near the entrance, a 
collection of "dream books" and pam- 
phlets addressing the various problems of 
love competed for the customer's atten- 
tion in gaudy Multilith jackets. 1 was 
mining the perfumed, colored candles 
guaranteed to bring good fortune with 
continued use when a lovely mocha- 
skinned girl came in from the back room 
and stood behind the counter. She wore 
white smock over her dress and looked. 
about 19 or 20. "May I help you?" she 
asked. Just beneath her carefully raodu- 
lated diction lingered the melodic calyp- 
so lilt of the ibbean. 

"Is Miss Proudfoot on the premises?” 

I'm Miss Proudfoot,” she s; 

"Miss Evangeline Proudfoot?’ 

"Fm Epiphany. Evangeline was my 
mother. 

“You say was?" 

Momma died last yea 
"I'm sorry to hear that. 
“She'd been sick for a long time, flat 
on her back for years. It 

"She left you a lovely name, Epipha- 
ny," I said, "It fits you.” 

Beneath her coffee-and-milk comple: 
ion, she flushed slightly. "She left me 
good deal more than that. This store's 
been making a profit for forty years. Did 
you do business with Momm: 
No, we never met. I was hoping she 
might answer some questions for m 

Epiphany Proudfoot's topaz eyes dar 
ened. “What're you, some kind of cop? 

1 smiled, the Look alibi engraved on 
my silver tongue, but I figured she was 
too smart to buy it, so I said, “Private 
nse. I can show you a photostat. 
Never mind your dimestore photo- 
1. Why did you want to talk to Mom- 


"m lool 
Favorite." 

She stiffened. It was as if someone 
touched the back of her neck vith an ice 


ing for a man named Johnny 


cube. “He's dead," she said. 
"No, he's not, although most. people 
m to think so.” 
аг as I'm concerned, he’s dead.” 
Did you know him?" 


friend of 
your mother's. 

"That was before I was born," she said. 

“Did your mother ever talk to you 
about him?" 

"Surely, Mr. . . . whoever you are, you 
don't expect me to betray my momma's 
confidences, I clearly see you are not a 
gentleman." 

I let that one pass. "Perhaps you can 
tell me if you or your mother ever saw 
Johnny Favorite in. say, the last fifteen 
years or so.” 

"I told you we never met, and I was 
always introduced to all Momma's 
friends." 

I got out my wallet, the one I carry 
cash in, and gave her my Crossroads card. 
"OK," I said, “it was a long shot, any- 
way. That's my office number on the 
bottom. I wish you'd call me if you think 
of anything or hear of anybody having 
seen Johnny Favorite.” 

She smiled, but there was no 
in it. “What're you after him for 

“I'm not ‘after’ him; I just want to 
know where he 

She stuck my card in the glass of the 
ornate brass cash register. “And what if 
he's dead?’ 

“I get paid either way.” 

It was almost a real laugh this time. “I 
hopc you find him six feet under," she 
said. 


. 
By the time I got back to the Red 
Rooster, I'd missed an entire set and 
‘Toots was sitting on the same stool at the 
bar. A glass of champagne fizzed at his 
elbow. I lit a cigarette as I edged through 
the crowd. "Find out what you were 
alter?" Toots asked without interest. 
angeline Proudfoot is dead.” 
Dead? Now, that is a for-certain 
shame. She was onc finc lady.” 

“You seem to have known her pretty 
well, What more can you tell me about 
her affair with Johnny Favorite?” 

Toots Sweet lumbered to his tiny feet, 
“I can't tell you nothin’, son. I'm too big 
to go around hiding under bed: 
it’s time fo" me to go back to work. 

He flashed his star-studded grin and 
started for the bandstand. I tagged along 
like an eager newshound. “I'm in no hur- 
ry. 1 сап listen to you play all night 

“Just sit out the set, son." Toots lifted 
the curved lid of the baby grand. A 
chicken foot lay on the keyboard. He 
slammed the lid shut, “Stop hangin’ over 
my shoulder!" he growled. “I got to play 
now. 

"What was that? 

“That was nothin’, Never you 
that” 

But it was not nothing. It was the foot 


ind 


d S | е; 
0 х | 
19 mg. "tar", 1.3 mg. nicotine av. per cigarette, FTC Report MAY ‘7B. x y ^h h 
4 


7s фр < 
me A 
ЖА ow 


5 ey 
The man. The cigarette. 
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Ordinary cigarettes just 
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Its blend of Turkish and 
gives him what he smoke: 
Pleasure. Satisfaction. 
A Camel Fiiters Man u! 


Yirg ма 7774 LR ir 
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o 
a% 


“This woman, she is like my tequila. 
Smooth, but with a lot of spirit." 


Her name was—well we're not sure. And she 
appears to have been the only other love Two Fingers 
had besides his tequila. 

“It’s her spirit I capture in the tequila I make. It is 
soft but, oh, so passionate,” he reportedly said. 

She traveled with Two Fingers as he brought the 
taste of this special tequila—Two Fingers Tequila — 
north of the border. 

And then, without warning, they both disap- 
peared leaving behind only the passionate taste of the 
Two Fingers Tequila we enjoy today. ©1978. Imported and Bottled by Hiram 


Walker & Sons, Inc., Peoria, Il., Tequila, 80 
Send for our free recipe booklet: Two Fingers Tequila, P.0. Box 14100, Detroit, MI 48214 Proof. Product of Mexico. 750 ml (25.4 fl. oz.) 


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PLAYBOY 


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The Desk Top 


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of a chicken, spanning an octave from 
the sharp yellow claw on the lizardlike 
toe to where it was cut oll above the 
joint and bleeding. 

"s going on, Toots?” 


Wha 


Toots hissed. "Nothin's going on ve 
got to know about. Now, 1 ain't talking 
to you no mo’. Not after the set. Not 
never 

"Who's alter you, Toots?" 

“You git оша here.” 


"i 
do with й 
Toots spoke very slowly, ignoring the 
s player who appeared at his should 
If you don't get the hell out of her 
ıt onto the sidewalk, vo" 


avorite have to 


does Johnny F 


by 


na wish yo" lily-white ass never was 
born." 
1 met the bass players implacable gaze 


а full 


and glanced around. Thi 
house. | knew how Custer mu 
upon the hilltop at Little B 

“AIL 1 got to do," Toots said, 
the word.” 

"You don't need to send a telegram. 
Toots." 1 dropped my butt onto the 
dance floor, ground it under my heel 


is say 


was parked in the same spot 
mth and 1 headed for it when 
ht changed. 1 got in behind the 
wheel, lit another cigarette and settled 
down to wait. 

Toots came out of the club about five 
minutes before A | 
led to a stop at his shrill, two- 
fingered whistle. 1 switched on the igni- 
tion and tailed the cab to 152nd Street, 
where it stopped in front of one of the 
Harlem River Houses and waited out 
front with the door open and the roof 
light off. Toots was just running upstairs. 
1 turned my headlights off and. doubl 
parked where E could watch the cab. He 
was back in minutes. He car 
plaid canvas bowling-ball bag. 

The cab took a left at Macomb's 
Place amd continued downtown on 
Fighth Avenue. I stayed three blocks 
back and kept it in sight all the way to 
Frederick Douglass Circle, where it swung 
cast on 10th and followed the northern 
wall of Central Park, 1 parked around 
the corner on St, Nicholas in time to see 
the cab drive off and the retreating form 
of Toots Sweet, a shadow sliding into the 
shadow world of the dark and silent p: 

E 

He kept to the path bordering 
western rim of Harlem Meer. 1 stayed 
oll to one side in the shadows, but Toots 
never looked back. He hurried along 
»ward the Loch, the most remote section 
of Central Park, The path wound into a 
deep ravine crowded with trees and 
shrubs and completely cut off from the 
city. It was dark there and very still. For 
moment, 1 thought 1 had lost Toots. 
Then E heard the drums. 

1 edged through the trees until I 
ached the cover of a large rock. Four 


cab squ 


jed а red. 


x the 


white candles flickered on saucers set on 
the ground. I counted 15 people standing 
in the dim light. There were three drum- 
h playing an instrument of a 
size. 

wing a white dress and 
scribed convoluted designs on the 
ground between the candles. She used 
fuls of flour like а Hopi sand ра 
cing the swirling figures around а 
hole dug into the packed earth, 
She turned and her face was illuminated 
by candle flame. It was Epiphany Proud- 
foot. 

The onlookers swayed from side to 
side, chanting and clapping in time with 
the drumming. Several men shook gourd 
rattles. 1 watched Toots Sweet wield his 
like Xavier Cugat fronting a 
mba band 
Epiphany was l 


efor in spite of the 
cold. twirling handfuls of Pillsbury's Best 
onto the ground, When the design was 
finished, she jumped back, reaching he 
ghostwhite hands above her head like 
cheerleader of doom. Her spastic shimmy 
n had the whole crowd dancing. 

Shadows shifted grotesquely in the u 
even candlelight. The demonic he 
of the drums caught the dancers in its 
spell. Their eyes rolled back 
heads; spittle frothed on the 
g lips. Men and women rubbed 
d, pelvises thrustin, 
of sex. The 


whites of their eyes gleamed like opals in 
their sweating faces. 
piphany's white dress clung to her 
. young body. She reached into 
г basket, removing а leg-bound 
rooster. The bird held up his head 
proudly, his blood-red comb vivid in the 
candlelight. Epiphany rubbed the white 
st hi 


breasts as she danced 
ressed 
cing 


ng the crowd, she 
cach of the others in turn. A p 
cockcrow silenced the drums. 
Gliding gracefully, Epiphany be 
the circular pit and cut the roosters 
with a deft turn of a razor. Blood 


ngs thrashed w 
neers moaned. 
swayed forward а 
to the p ings of coins, 1 
fuls of dried corn, assorted cookies. can 
dies and fruit. А woman poured a Боце 
of Coca-Cola over the dead chicken. 
the limp 


One by one 
d dropped. ойе 


Afterward, Epiphany too 
bird and hung it, upside down, from the 
branches of a nearby tree. Things be; 
10 break up about then. The congrega- 


on slipped oll into the darkness without 
a word ol farewell. Toots, Epiphany and 
two or three others walked. back along 
the path toward Harle 

1 tailed them through the shadows. 
skirting the path and keeping out of 
sight among the trees. By the Meer, the 


;odness! I didn't know that— 


1 thought it was just drinking while on duty 
you weren't supposed to do." 


247 


PLAYBOY 


248 


path divided. Toots headed toward the 
venth Avenue exit. I planned оп beat- 
ing him home. 

1 scaled the rough stone wall and 
for the Chevy. The streets were n 


rly 


empty and I sped uptown without miss- 
ing a light. 
I parked near the corner of Macomb's 


Place and walked the rest of the way 
through the Harlem River Houses dev 
opment. I found the entrance to Toots's 


building on 15?nd and looked for 
his apartment number on the row of 
brass mailboxes set into the brick wall. 


The front door was no problem. 1 got 
it open with my penknife blade in less 
than a minute. Toots lived on the third 
floor. Т climbed the stairs and checked. 
out his nothing 1 
could do е, so I 
sat on the steps leading up and waited. 

. 

didn't have to wait long. I heard 
im pulling up the stairs and stubbed my 
butt out against the bottom of my shoe. 
When he had the door open, 1 made my 
I caught him from behi 
his coat collar and shovin, 
d into the apartment. He stumbled 
10 his knees. D switched on the ceiling 
light and closed the door behind me. 

Toots hufled to his feet. panting like 
ight hand plunged 
па came out hold- 
I shifted my weight. 
t to hurt you, old man." 

He lumbered forward, waving the ra 
zor. 1 caught his arm with my left hand 
d stepped in close, bringing my knee 


up hard. Toots sagged and sat down 
with a soft grunt. I twisted his wrist and 


he dropped the razor onto the с 
kicked it against the wall, 

Dumb, Toots.” T picked up the ri 
folded it and put it into my pocket. 

Toots sat, holding his belly with both 
hands. "What vou want with 
moaned. “You're no writer 
Getting smarter, So save the bullshit 
and tell me what you know about Johnny 
Favorit 
m hurt. E feel a 


Ш bust 


ed up inside." 


sten. Toots” 1 said. "I saw your 
: the park, Epiphany 
Proudfoors number with the chick 


it was poing on? 
)beah," he groaned. "Voodoo. Not 
every black man is a Baptist." 

пас about the Proudfoot gir 
does she fit in? 

She's a mambo, like her mother was 
before her, Been comin’ to humfo meet 
s since she was tem. Took over as 
priestess at th ; 

“That when Ex 
sick? 

“Yeah, Somethin’ like that.” 

1 offered Toots a smoke, but he shook 
his head. F lit one myself and asked. "Was 
Johnny Favorite into voodoo? 

"He was runnin’ " 
bo, wasn't һе? 


Wh; 


> How 


ngeline Proudfoot got 


round with the mam- 


“Did he go to meetings?" 
" "Course he did. Lots of 'em. He was 
а hunst-bosal. 


initiated but not bap. 


“When was the last time vou saw 


Johnny Favorite at one of your chicken 


snuffings: 
“I tol" you, I ain't seen him since ‘fo! 
the war. 
"What about the chicken foot? The 
one in the piano?” 
Jeans I talk too much." 
About Johnny Favorite? 
“ "Bout things in general.” 
Vot good enough, Toots. 
litle smoke in his face. 
piano with 


I blew a 
г to play 


st? 
se, but sagged back, 
You wouldn't do tha: 


the old 
nuck- 


d for emph: 
nything you want,” he said. 
h right along. 
"t seen Johnny 
the last fifteen y 
“Мо” 
What about Evange 
She ever mention seeing him 
“Not where I could hear it. Far as she 
was concerned, Johnny Favorite was dead 
and buried.” 
“Toots, ГИ ta 
you. How coi 
tooth like d 
Toots grimaced. The сшош star 
glinted in the overhead light, “That's so 
folks be sure I'm a nigger. Wouldn't 
want "em to make any mistakes.” 
“Why is it upside down?” 
"Look nicer that way 
1 placed one of my Crossroads cards on 
top of the TV. “I'm leaving a card with 
my number on it, If you hear anything, 
give me a cal 
“Yeah. Т got enough 
awready I got to start phonin' up 
“You never know. You might need 
some help next time you get a special- 
delivery chicken foot.” 
Outside, dawn smudged th 
like rouge on a chorus girl's che 
ng to the car, I dropped Toots's pe 
ndled razor into a garbage can, 


“You have 


€ à chance and believe 
а star on your 


you wear 


troubles 


m 


night sky 
Walk 
1- 


. 

The sun was shining when 1 finally hit 
the sack, but I managed to sleep until al- 
most noon in spite of bad dreams. I was 
haunted by nightmares more vivid than 
ny Late Show horr 
drums throbbed as Epiphany Proudloot 
cut the rooste throat, The 
swayed and moaned, only this 
bleeding didn't stop. A crimse 
gushed from the thrashing bi 
everything like a tropical rain, dancers 
all drowning in a lake of blood. I 
watched Epiphany go under and ran 
from my hiding place, gore splashing at 


my heels. I woke ups 

A hot shower seuled my nerves. I was 
shaved, dressed and driving uptown 
side of 20 minutes. I dropped the Chevy 
off at my garage and walked to the out- 
oftown ne id next to Times Tower. 
Dr. Albert Fowler's picture was on the 
front page of Monday's Poughkeepsie 
New Yorker. “NOTED DOCTOR FOUND DEAL 
said the headline. I read all about it over 
breakfast at the Whelan's drugstore in 
the corner of the Paramount Building. 

Up in the office, 1 considered my 
options. 1 had planned on driving 
Coney Island to try to locate Mad 
Zora, Johnny Favorite's gypsy fortune- 
teller, but decided to play a long shot 
and go back up to Harlem first. There 
was a lot Epiphany Proudfoot hadn't 
told me last night. 

I got my attaché case out of the office 
safe and was buttoning my overcoat when 
the phone rang. hi was long distance. 
person-to-person collect from Cornelius 
Simpson. I told the operator I would 
accept the charges. 

Га like to ask you some questi 
about Johnny Favorite," I 

"What 


creaming. 


ns 


aw Johnny was the day 
"s this all abou 


ne 1 
arl Harbor. Wh 


ng a story for Look on for 
gotten vocalists of the Forties. Johnny 
Favorite is at the top of the list. 

"Not my list, brother. 
7" I said. “I£ I spoke to just 
his fans, | wouldn't get a very intere 


g 


сап you tell me 
with a West Indian woman named Evan- 
geline Proudfoot?” 

“Nor a damn thing. This is the first 
I've heard of it. 

“Did you know he was i 
voodoo?” 

“Sticking pins in dolls? Well, it figures: 
Johnny was Чо. He was always into 
Something s $ 

“Such as wh 

“Oh, let's see; one time, I saw him 
catching pigeons up on the roof of our 
hotel. 1 thought maybe he didn't like the 
chow in the place, but later, I dropped 
by his room, and there he was, poking 
through the guts with a pencil.” 

“What was that all about?” 

“That's what I asked him. He told me 
some fancy word 1 can't remember, Said 
he was predicting the future like the 
priests in ancient Rome used to do." 

"Sounds like that ol' black magic had 
him in its spell," I said. 

Spider Simpson laughed. "You said it, 
brother. If it wasn't pigeon guts, it was 
some other damn thi ves, palm. 
readers, yoga. He carried a skull in his 
suitcase." 


“A human skull?” 

“Once upon a time, it was human. He 
said it came from the grave of a man 
who murdered ten people. Claimed it 


power 
»unds like he was putting you on,” 
I 
‘ould be. He used to si 
it for hows before a performa 
was a put-on, it was а damn good on 
“Did you know Margaret Krusemar 
I asked. 


I met her a few time 
“Whitt was she 1 
“Very pretty. Didn't talk much. You 

know the type, lots of eye contact but no 

сопу 


1 heard somewhere she was а fortune: 
teller 

“That may be. She never told me 
minc 


“Why did they break up?" 

“I wouldn't know." 

“Can you give me the names of any of 
Johnny Favorites old friends? People 
lt be able to help me out with 
the story." 

“Brother, aside from bonehead in the 
Johnny didn't have a friend on 


a piano player 
t that was years before 1 


. thanks for the information," I 
за big help." 


“Any tini 


We both hung up. 
А 


5 on the West Side 
Highway up to nd drove east 
along Harlem's ‚ past the Hotel 
Theresa and the Apollo Theater, over to 


1 dodged chuck 


1 found a wall phone їп a luncheonette 
in the next block. There was no listing 
for Epiphany Proudfoot, 1 tried the 
моге but got mo a Thumbing 
through the directory, 1 located. Edison 
Sweets number. I d 1 the first four 
digits and hung up, deciding a surprise 
uld be more effective, Ten min- 
utes later, 1 w: l оп I5?nd Street 
across Irom his building. 

I climbed. the rs to the third floor 
There was no one on the landing, and 
when | bent to check the m of the 
lock, 1 found that the door was not quite 
shut. 1 pushed it all the way open with 
my foot. A vivid red splash stained the 
opposite wall Rorschach-test blot, 


— 


PEOPLE WHO ENJOY JACK DANIELS, 


generally like Herb Fanning and his signs. 


Herb runs a litcle store here in Lynchburg. 
And it's full of old things reproduced from 
Mr. Jack Daniel's day. For instance, there's 
a bar sign that also tells che temperature; 

a wall plaque designed around the 

1904 World's Fair; and some [ 
old-time posters, mirrors and 


serving trays. If you'd like CHARCOAL 
А MELLOWED 
to own any of these items, ü 
just joc Herb a note at DROP 
The Lynchburg Hardware 6 
BY DROP 


Store. He'll send you 
full particulars. 
Tennessee Whiskey • 90 Proof = Distilled and Bottled by Jack Daniel Distillery 


Lem Motlow, Prop.. inc., Lynchburg (Pop. 361). Tennessee 37352 
Placed in the National Register of Historic Places by the United States Government. 


249 


PLAYBOY 


my back against it until the lock caught. 
The room mess, furniture 

thrown about haphazardly on a carpet 

A shelf of flower- 


was а 


па the 
sagged like the stockings of a 
on a week-long drunk. Amid the 
the TV stood intact. The set 
soap opera nurse discussed 
idultery with an attentive intern. 

1 careful not to touch 
I stepped over the upended furniture. 
Beyond the babbling TY, a short, dark 
I led to a closed door. Т got my latex 
surgeon's gloves out of the attaché case 
па rolled them onto my hands before 
g the knob. One look in the bed- 
room made me want a drink badly. 

Toots Sweet lay on his back on the 
narrow bed, his hands and feet bound to 
the posts with lengths of cotton clothes- 
line. He would never get any 
crumpled, blood-soaked flannel bathrobe 
draped his potbelly. Beneath his black 
body, the sheets were still with blood. 

Тоок open, bulging eyes were yel- 
lowed, like antique ivory спе balls, and 
stuffed into his gaping mouth was some- 
thing resembling a fat, 
Bratwurst, Death by asphy 
that without waiting for the autopsy. 

1 took a closer look at what protruded 
from his swollen lips and suddenly one 
drink wasn't going to be enough. Toots 
had choked to death on his own geni- 
talia. Outside, in the courtyard thre 
lights down, I heard the happy laughter 
ol children, 

On the wall above the bed, a number 
of childlike drawings had be 
in Toots's blood: si 
zag lines representing snake 
three of them, were five-pointed and up- 
side down, Falling stars were getting to 
be a habit. 

I said goodbye to Edison Sweet and 
closed the bedroom door on the sightless 
stare of his bulging eyes. My tongue felt 
heavy and dry їп my mouth when I 
thought of what was stuffed in his. I 
wanted to check out the livi room 
before I left, but there was too much dirt 


nt door, I squinted through 
the peephole before letting myself out. I 
lelt the door open a crack, just the way 
Га found it, and. peeled off my rubber 
gloves, shutting them inside the calfskin 
case. I paused at the top of the landing 
nd listened to the silence below. 1 made 
it down the sta hout being seen. 
Wh ilding, the only ones 
round were a group of small children 
playing hopscotch in the courtyard. 
. 

Three straight shots settled my nerves. 
It was a quiet neighborhood nd I 
sat with my back to the TV and thought 
things over. Now I had two dead men on 


250 my hands. They had both known Johnny 


Favorite and worn five-pointed stars. The 
stars maybe were a coincidence; it's a 
common design. And maybe it was just 
by chance that a junkie doctor and a 
blues piano player both knew Johnny 
Favorite. Maybe. But deep down 
gut, I had a feeling that it was t 
something bigger. Something enormous 
1 scooped my change off the damp bartop 

nd went back to work for Louis Cyphre. 
The drive out to Coney Island w: 
ction. L rolled dow 
window on the Shore Parkway 
breathed the cold sea air blowing 
through the Narrows. By the time I 
reached Cropsey Avenue, the smell of 
blood was gone from my nostrils. 

1 parked beside a boarded-up bumper- 
cw ride. Coney Island in the off season. 
had the look and feel of а ghost tow 
"The skeletal tracks of the roller coasters 
rose above me like metal-and-timher 
derwebs, but the screams were mi 
and the wind moaned through the struts, 
lonesome as a train whistle. 
amous was open for bu: 
s always, and I stopped for a hot 
dog and a cardboard cup of bee: der 
the boldly lettered billboard facade. The 
counterman looked like he'd been 
around since the days of Luna Park. and 
I asked if he'd ever heard of a fortune- 
teller named Madam Zora. 

Madam who: 
Zora. She was a big attraction. here 
back in the Forties, 

“Was she a skinny broad? D; ? 

“You A crooner named 
Johnny Favorite used to come see her 
alo 


Ain't never been 


“What do you remember about her?” 
“Not a thing, bud.” He smiled, shov 
ng me four missing teeth. “Know who 
might be able to help ус 
“No, who? 
“Old Paul Boltz He used to be her 
back then. He's still 
Where can I find H 
“Over at Steeplechase 
dog there now. 
Г said thanks 
ping beer. 


nd wa 


. 
Steeplechase Park spanned 95 acres. 
The Parachute Jump, а hand-me-down 
from the °39 World's Fair, towered above 
the factory-sized, glass-walled pavilion 
like the framework of a 200-foot um- 
Drella. A sign out front said, т 
PLACE, above the leering, painted 
founder George С. Tilyou. Steeplechase 
was as funny this time of year as а joke 
without ch line, and T looked up 
at the grinning Mr. Tilyou and won- 
dered what there was to laugh about. 

1 found a man-sized hole in the chain- 
link fence and pounded on the salt- 
encrusted glass near the locked front 
entrance, The noise echoed through the 


empty amusement park 
tergeists on a ghostly spree. 


с a dozen pol- 


Turning a corner, I came face to face 
with a Colt's Police Positive .38 Special. 
the 38 without a tremor was an 

riy in а brown-and-tan uniform. A 


of pig-squint eyes sized me up above 
shaped like a ball-peen hammer 
“Freeze!” he said. His voice seemed to 
come from under water, I froze, 

"You must be Mr. Bolt,” I said. "Paul 
Boltzz 

“Never mind who I am. Who the fuck 

you 
My name is Angel. I'm a private de- 
tective, | need to talk to you about a 
case I'm working on." 

Show me something to prove 

When I started for my wallet, Boltz 
jabbed his .38 emphatically at my belt 
buckle. "Left hand,” he snarled. 

I shifted the attaché case to my right 
hand and got out my wallet with my left. 

“Drop it and take two steps back.” 

Boltz stooped and picked it up. His 
Police Positive stayed trained on my 
belly button. “This here honorary buzzer 
don't mean shit to me," he said. Ot il 
picce of tin at home just like it 

“I didn't claim that was valid; just 
look at the photostat.” 

The pig-eyed watchman flipped 
through the cardholders in my wallet 
without comment. I thought of rushing 
him then but let it rest. “OK, so you're a 
private dick," he sid. “What do you 
want with me?” 
/ou Paul Bolt 
What if I am?" He tossed my wallet 
onto the deck at my feet. 

I stooped and picked it up with my left 
. "Look, ivs been a hard а, Put 
the gun away. I need your help. Can't 
you tell when a guy is asking for a 
favo 

He looked at the revolver for a mo- 
ment, as if considering having it lor 
supper. "Then he shrugged and slipped it 
back into his holster, pointedly lc 
the flap unbuttoned. “I'm Boltz,” he 
mitted. "Let's hear your spiel." 

“Is there someplace we can get out of 
all this wind?" 

Boltz mot 


lowed a half pace behind and we went 
down a short flight of steps to а door 
xo ENTRY. "In here," he 
"Ics open. 

Our footsteps boomed like ca 
shots in the empty building. ‘The place 
was large enough to contain a couple of 
plane hangars. We paused in front of 
а row mirrors, the dis- 
to 


non 


ob fun-house 


your pitch.” 
said, "I'm looking for a gypsy for 
tuneteller named Madam Zora. 1 under- 
stand you used to work for her back in 
the Forties.” 

Boltz's phlegm-thickened laughter rose 


€ 1978 n 1 REYHOLS oBACCECO 


“There's only one reason lever 
smoked. Good taste. 

"So when I switched to low tar, 

I wasn't about to give that up. If you 

$ dontsmoke for taste 


^ what else is there? 
“But there was all 
that talk about tar. 


“Unfortunately, most low 
tar cigarettes tasted like nothing. 
Then | tried Vantage. 

“Vantage gives me the taste 
Tenjoy. And the low tar Ive 
ү. been looking for.” 


Ca AME, 


Vince Dougherty 
Philadelphia, Pa 


Regular Menthol, 
and Vantage 100s. 


FILTER 100°: 10 mg. "tar", 

08 mg. nicotine, FILTER, 

MENTHOL: 11 mg. "tar". 0.8 mg. nicotine, 
av. per cigarette, FTC Report MAY ‘78. 


Warning: The Surgeon General Has Determined 
That Cigarette Smoking Is Dangerous to Your Health. 


PLAYBOY 


to the lightbulbstudded girders over- 
head like the barking of a trained seal. 
“Bub,” he chortled, “you ain't gonna get 
to first base the way you're headed. 

“Why not?” 

“Why not? I'll tell you why not. First 
off, she ain't no gypsy, that’s why not.” 

“Tell me about it.” 

“OK, dick, I'll give it to you straight. 
She weren't no gypsy and her name 
wasn't Zora. I happen to know she was 
a Park Avenoo debutante.” 

It took a while to get my tongue back 
in gear. “Did you know her real name! 

"Whadya take me for, a gazoonic? I 
knew all about her. Her name was Mag- 
gie Krusemark. Her father owned. more 
boats than the British navy." 

My elongated reflection stretched. like 
Plastic Man across the wavy surface of 
the trick mirror, “When did you see her 
he rubber lips asked. 

g of ‘Forty-two. One day, she 
pulled a lade. Left me holding the crysta 
П, you might 
Did you ever se 


her with a singer 
Sure, lots of times, She was stuck on 


Jid she ever say anything about him 
you can remember? 


Look. | never paid much attention. 
To me, it was just a carny hustle. I 
ke it serious.” Boltz cle. 
It was different 


“What about Favorite?’ 
He was a believer, too. You could see 
it in his eyes." 

Tave you ever seen him а 
"Never. Maybe he flew off to the moon 

on his broomstick.” 

“Did she ever mention а Negro pi 
player named Toots Sweet?” 

Nope. 
“Can you think of anything else?" 
Boltz spit ow the floor between his feet. 

“Why should I? Them days are dead 

and buried.” 

There wasn't much else to talk about. 
Вой: walked me back outside and un- 
locked the gate. I hesitated before giving 
him one of my Crossroads cards and 
asked him to call if anything came up. 
He didn't say he would, but he didn't 
tear up my card, 


Toots Sweet n 
Daily News. Tr 
the uptown IRT, having left the Chevy 
in a parking lot around the corner from 
the Chelsea. My firs 
I where, after several misdirec- 
tions, | asked the right question and 
came up with a current Paris telephone 
directory. There was a listing for an M. 


ing paper on 


252 Krusemark on the Rue Nowe-Dames-des- 


Champs. I wrote it down in my nore- 
book. 

It was nearly noon by the time І 
unlocked the inner door to my office. I 
sorted the mail, finding a $500 check 
from the firm of McIntosh, Winesap and 
Spy. All the rest was junk I filed in the 
wastebasket before phoning my answer- 
ing service. There were no messages. 
although a woman who refused to lea 
a name or number 
that morning. 

Next, I tried to reach Margaret Kruse- 
mark in Paris, but the overseas operator 
could get no answer after 20 minutes of 
g I was struggling back 
overcoat when the phone rang. I gr: 
it on the third ring. It was Epiphany 
Proudfoot. She sounded out of breath, 
“T've got to see you right away,” she said. 
“What abou 
"I don't want to talk on the phone.” 

I said c your time. I'm going out 
for something to eat and will meet you 
k in my office at опе! fifteen ug 
ng up without g goodbye. 

leaving, I locked Winesap's 
check in the office safe. I was kneeling 
there when I heard the doorstop's pneu- 
matic wheeze in the outer room. When 
someone barges in without knocking, it's 
cither а cop or trouble. Sometimes both 
in the same package. 

This time it was a plainclothes dick 
ng a wrinkled gray gabardine rain- 
coat unbuttoned over a brown mohair 
piperack special with culls sufficiently 
shy of his perforated brogans to provide 
a sneak preview of his white athletic 
socks. 

“You Angel? 

“That's right. 

т Detective Lieutenant Sterne, Th 
is my pa 

He nodded at the open partition door, 
where a barrel-chested man dressed like a 
longshoreman stood scowling, 

"What can I do for you gentemen?" 
I said. 

“Answer a couple questions.” Sterne 
was tall and lantern-jawed. with a nose 
like the prow of an icebreaker. When he 
spoke, his lips scarcely moved. 

"Be glad to. I was just heading for a 
bite to cat. Care to join me? 

“We can talk better here, 
His partner closed the door. 

"Si me.” I walked around in back 
of my des 

“Where were you yesterday morning 
around eleve: 
t home. Asleep.” 
great being self-employed.” 
Sterne cracked out of the side of his 
mouth to Deimos. The sergeant just 
grunted, “Why is it you're snoozing when 
the rest of the world is at work, Angel?” 
ing late the night befor 

“Where might that have been?” 

“Up i lem. What's this all about, 
Licutei 

Sterne got something out of his 


he barked. 


terne said. 


coat pocket and held it up for me to sec. 
"Recognize this? 

I nodded. "One of my business cards.” 

“Maybe you'd like to explain how 
come it was found in the apartment of a 
murder victim.” 

‘Toots Sweet?” 

“Tell me about it.” Sterne sat on the 
corner of my desk and tipped his gray 
hat back on his forehead. 

"OK. What I've got going is a m 
persons’ operation, The in question 
took a walk more than a dozen years ago. 
One of my few leads was ап old photo of 
the guy posing with Toots Sweet. 1 went 
uptown last night to ask Toots if he 
could help me out, He played cagey at 
first when I talked to п at the Red 
Rooster, so I tailed him down to the park 
ter Closing time. He went to some kind 
of voodoo ceremony over by the Meer 
They shuffled around and killed a chick- 
en. I felt like a tourist 

“Who all is 'they'?" asked Sterne. 

"About fifteen men and women, col- 
ored. I'd never seen any of them before 
except Toots.” 

What did you do?” 

Nothing. Toots left the park alone. T 
tailed him home and got him to talk 
straight. He said he hadn't seen the guy 
I was looking for since the picture was 
taken, I gave him my card. and said to 
call me if he thought of anything.” 

Sterne looked his thick fingernails 
with disinterest. “What did you use to 
get him to tal 

“Psychology, 

Sterne raised yebrows and re- 
garded me with the same disinterest he 
lavished on his fingernails. "So who is 
the famous party in question? The one 
who walked?” 

“I can't give out that information with- 
out the consent of my client 

“Bullshit, Angel. You won't do your 
client any good downtown, and that's 
just where ГЇЇ take you if you dam up 
on me. 

"Why be disagreeable, Lieutenant? I'm 
working for a lawyer named Winesap. 
That entitles me to the same right to 
privacy а . If you pulled me in, Га 
be out within the hour. Save the city 
сае, 

“What’s this lawyer's number?” 

I wrote it out on the desk pad along 
h his full name, tore the shect loose 
nd handed it to Sterne. “E told you all 
I know. From what I read in the paper, 
it sounds like some of Toots's chicken- 
snuffng fellow parishioners put him 
way. I you make a pinch, ГЇЇ be happy 
to look him over in the line-up. 

“That's white of you, Angel; 
sneered, 

“Any further questions, Lieutenant?” 
I asked. 

Sterne turned. his dead cop's gaze on 
me again. You could tell from his eyes 
that he never smiled. Not even during a 
third-degree session. He was just doing 


I 


Sterne 


PLAYBOY 


254 


his job. “None. You and your ‘right to 
privacy’ сап go eat lunch now.” 

We all wedged into the tiny elevator 
together and rode down without saying 
a word. 


. 
Gough's Chop House was across 43rd 
Street from the Times Building. The 
place was packed, but I squeezed into a 
corner by the bar and ordered roast beef 
on rye. Walt Rigler spotted me on his 
у out. “What's up, Harry?" he shouted 
the din of newspaper shoptalk. 
liule. Thanks for letti 
те, I owe you one.” 
orget it. How goes your 
tery? Digging up any good dirt?” 
More than 1 сап handle. Thought I 
had a strong lead yesterday, Went to see 
Krusemark’s fortunerelling daughter, but 
I picked the wrong one.” 
What do you mean, the wrong оп 
“They're wins; Maggie and Millie, the 
supernatural Krusemark girls.” 
Walt rubbed the back of his neck and. 
frowned. “Someone's pulling your leg, 
pal Margaret Krusemark’s an only 
child. 
“You sure of that; 
“Course I'm sure. I just checked it out 
for you yesterday. Krusemark had a 
daughter by his wife. Just one, Harry. 
The Times doesn’t make mistakes in the 
ital-statistics deparunent. 
“I should have known she was pl 
me for a sucker, It was too ра 
low down, pal, you're way ahead of 


g me 


le mys- 


me. 
“Sorry, Walt. Just thinking out loud. 


My watch says five after one; is that 
ht 
‘Close enough." 
I stood up, leaving my change on the 
"Got to run." 
‘Don't let me stop you. 
grinned his lopsided gri 
e. 
Epiphany Proudfoot was waiting in 
the outer room of my office when I got 
there minutes later. She was wearing a 
nd a blue cashmere 


Walt F 


orry I'm late,” 

"Don't be. I was € rly.” She tossed 
aside а well-thumbed back issue of Sports 
Illustrated and uncrossed her legs. On 
her, even the secondhand Naugahyde 
chair looked good. 

I unlocked the door in the pebbled- 
glass partition апа held it open. “Why 
did you want to see me? 

She stood by the w with the 
eight-inch gold letters, staring down at 
the street. “Who's paying you to look for 
Johnny Favorite 

“T can't tell you that. One of the things 
my services include is discretion, Won't 
you sit down 

I took her coat and hung it next to 
mine as she settled gracefully into the 
padded-leather chair acros from my 
desk. It was the only comfortable seat in 
the place, “You still haven't answered my 
question,” I said, leaning back in my 
swivel chair, "Why are you here?" 

“Edison Sweet has been murdered.” 

“Uh-huh. 1 read the papers. But you 
shouldn't be too surprised: You set him 
up." 


dow 


COCHRAN! 


“How do you expect me to be popular 
with girls when all the other guys can afford pastel 
condoms and I have to use plastic wrap?” 


She denched he ndbag on her lap. 
‘ou must be out of your mind.’ 

“Maybe. But I'm not dumb. You were 
the only one who knew I was talking to 
Toots. You had to be the one who tipped 
off the boys that sent him the chicken 
foot.” 

You've got it all wrong.” 

"Have 1?” 

“There was no one else. After you left 
the store, I called my nephew. He lives 
around the corner from the Red Rooster. 
He hid the claw in the piano. Toots 
a blabbermouth. He needed remindi 
to keep his trap shut.” 

"You did а good job. It’s shut for 
keeps now." 

“Do you think I'd be coming to see 
you if 1 had anything to do with th 

"rd you were a capable girl, 
Epiphany. Your performance in the park 
was quite convincing." 

“You have no right to spy on me," 
said, not meeting my gaze. 

“The Parks Department and the Hu- 
mane Society would disagree. Quite a 
gruesome litle religion.” 

Epiphany's glance w 


she 


is black with fu 


“There never was an Obeah Holy War, 
or an Obeah Inq) 
“Yeah, 


ion 


re; youve got to ki 
e the soup, right?" 1 1 
nd blew a. plume of smoke 
ag. "But it's not dead chickens 
y me; it’s d 

“Don't you think I'm 
Epiphany was a tall drink of wate 
they say uptown, à nd it was easy to 
amine quenching my thirst on her 
why flesh. "You come around looking 
for Johnny Favorite and the next d 
man gets killed, "That's not just a co 
dence." 

“What is it, then; 

“Toots Sweet's death didn't ha 
thing to do with obeah." 

“How do you know that? 

"Did you see the pictures in the 
papers?” 

I nodded. 

“Then you know they're call 
bloody scribblings on the w: 
symbols." 

Another silent nod. 

“Well, the cops don't know any more 
about voodoo than they do about pe 
and rice! Those marks were supposed to 
look like vcvé, but it just isn't so.” 

“What's vevé? 

“Magic signs. All that bloody trash's 
got as much to do with the real thing as 
Santa Claus has to do with Jesus.” 

I stubbed out my butt in a Stork Club 
ashtray left over from a long-dead love 
affair. "You say the marks are phony?” 

"Not phony so much as, well, wrong. 
Like someone describing а baseball р 
and cali ¢ run a touchdown." 

1 folded the copy of the News to page 
three and pointed to the smakclike zig- 
zags, spirals and broken crosses in the 


in 


e any- 


g those 
1 voodoo 


ле 


g а ho 


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PLAYBOY 


256 


"So! You weren't just laying pipe in Alaska!” 


photo. “Are you saying these look like 
voodoo drawings but they're used in- 
correctly?” 

“That's right. See that serpent swallow- 
ing its own tail? That's Damballa, sure 
But no initiate would ever 
ht next to Babako like that.” 

"So whoever drew those pictures at 
least knew enough about voodoo to know 
what Damballa or Babako looked like 
in the first place.” 

“That's what I've been trying to tell 
you all along.” she said. “Did you know 
that Johnny Favorite was once upon a 
time mixed up with obeah?” 

“I know he was a hunsi-bosal.” 

“Toots really did have a big mouth. 
What else do vou know 

"Only that Johnny Favorite was run- 
ning around with your mother at the 


ipiphany made a face like tasting 
something sour. “It’s true.” She shook her 
head as if to deny it. "Johnny Favorite 
was my father.” 

I sat very still, 
chair as her revel: 


ipping the arms of my 
ion washed over me 
Who all knows about 


No one, 'cept you and me and Mom- 

ma, and she's dead.” 

"What about Johnny Favorit 

"Momma never told him, He was aw 
in the Army long before I was а усаг 
old." 

pe 
now 

"I'm scared. There's something about 
Toots’s death that has to do with me. I 
can feel it deep down in my bone 

“And you think Johnny F. 
mixed up in it somehow?" 

“I don't know what to think. You're 
supposed to do the thinking.” 

“IE you're holding out on me, now 
would be the time to tell.” 

Epiphany stared at her folded hands. 

i nothing more to tell” She 
stood up then, very brisk and efficient. “1 
must be going, I'm sure you have work 
to do.” 


w come you're opening up to me 


vorite is 


"I'm doing it right now," I said, get- 
ting to my fect. 
She collected her coat from the rack. 
t that stuff earlier, you 


^] trust you m 
know, about discretion, 

“Everything you told me is strictly 
confiden! 

"I hope so." She smiled then. It was a 
and not designed to pet 
results. "Somehow, against all my better 
judgment, I trust you. 

I stood at the corner of my desk, not 
moving until I heard the door to the 
outer room close behind her. In three 
steps, I grabbed my attaché case, wrestled 
my coat off the rack and locked the office. 

I waited with my ear to the outer door, 
listening for the self-service elevator 
opening and closing before I left. The 
hallway was empty. I sprinted for the fire 


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stairs and took the steps three at a 
time on my way down. 


б 

I beat the elevator by 15 seconds and 
waited inside the stair well. Epiphany 
walked past me out onto the street. 1 
was right behind, following her around. 
the corner and down into the subw 

She caught the uptown IRT local. 1 
got on the next car in line. Two stops 
later, she got off at Columbus Circle. 
She walked cast along Central Park 
South and turned downtown at Seventh 
venue. I watched her studying the en- 
nce numbers as she hurried by the 
Athletic Club and the sculpture- 
encrusted Alwyn Court Apartments. She 
slowed her pace along the side of Car- 
negie Hall. I saw her pause at the far 
end of the block and go inside the build- 
ing. I already knew the address: 881 
Seventh. It was where Margaret. Kruse- 
mark lived. 

1 walked along the deserted hallway to 
the door wearing the brand of Scorpio. 
I unsnapped my attaché case оп the 
threadbare carpet. А bunch of dummy 
forms and papers in the accordion file 
on top made it look official, but under- 
neath a false bottom, I kept the tools of 
the trade. A layer of polyurethane foam 
held a set of case-hardened bur 
tools, a contact mike and m 
tape recorder, ten-power I 
lars, a Minox camera with а stand for 
photographing documents, a collection 
keys that cost me S500, 
nickelsteel handcuffs and а loaded .38 
Special Smith & Wesson Centennial with 
an Airweight alloy frame. 

I got out the contact mike and plugged 
in the carphone. It was а nice piece of 
equipment. When I held the mike to the 
surface of the door, I h d everything 
that went on inside the apartment. 1 
heard Margaret Krusemark say, "We 
re not the best of friends, but 1 had a 


5 


great respect for your mother.” Epiph- 
anys mumbled reply was inaudible. 
‘The astrologer went on, y quite a 


of her before you were born. 
woman of power. Our relation- 
ship was a peculiar one, I don't deny it. 
I should hope that you are sulhiciently 
sophisticated not to be swayed by bour- 
geois convention, Your mother certainly 
never ss = 

"What could be more bourgeois than а 
ménage à trois?” 

t was not a ménage à trois! What do 
you think we volved in, some 
hideous little sex clu 

"I'm sure 1 have not the faintest idea 
what you were involved in. Momma 
never mentioned you to me at all.” 

"Why should she? As far as she was 
concerned, Jonathan was dead and. bur- 
icd. He was all that linked us.” 

"But he's not dead.” 

“Has someone been around asking 
questions about Jonath 
(continued on page 263) 


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260 


PLAYBOY POTPOURRI 


people, places, objects and events of interest or amusement 


CREATURE 
FEATURE 
With everyone flock- 

ing to see flicks 
about extraterres- 
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this Halloween you 
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ing as something 
that came from out 
of the sky. Bill 
Nelson and Kirk 
Brady, two artists 
working out of 

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Avenue, Richmond, 
Virginia 23227, have 
created an 18” high, 
full-head Ultimate 
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available in two col- 
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or Martian cream, 
for $55, postpaid. 
The masks, of heavy 
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ALL THAT JAZZ 
Live jazz is returning to the airwaves on National Public Radio stations 
across the country and the music that is being broadcast is as fine 
as апу you might have heard back in the Forties. For a complete list of 
jazz tapings, times and the NPR station in your arca, write to 
Jazz Alivel, National Public Radio, 2025 M Street N.W., Washington, 
D.C., 20036. During October, you'll hear Art Blakey at San Francisco's 
Keystone Korner and Tito Puente's Latin Big Band sounds. All right! 


IT'S IN THE BAG 
Inflation being what it is, even biggies in 
the business world are beginning to 
brown-bag it to work. To help distinguish 
the boss from his employees, Britches 
of Georgetown (1247 Wisconsin Avenue, 
Washington, D.C. 20007) is selling а 
vinyHined soft-grain leather executive 
lunch bag for $19.75, postpaid, that looks 
just like paper but smells and feels 
like a saddle. What's for lunch, J.B.? 
Cowhide on white with mayo? 


CHARMING BILLY 
You've tasted Billy Carter's namesake brew 
and brayed at his redneck jokes; now, 
for S2, you can become a lifetime member 
of his club, the Plains Country Club, 
P.O. Box 352, Plains, Georgia 31780, home 
of the Good Ole Boys Room, where any- 
body who's anybody in Plains gathers to 
eat barbecue, drink beer, shoot pool and 
swap Jimmy С. stories. The club is located 
two miles west of Plains on U. S. 280. 
No, it doesn't have a golf course. 


BRAINBUSTER IL 
MasterMind is a devilishly 
tricky game in which one 
code breaker tries to crack 
his opponent's secret code. 
The original Master Mind— 
which is still available at 
most stores—called for two 
players; now Invicta, Master- 
Mind's manufacturer - 
troducing an electronic 
version of the game that 
will sell at Sears stores for 
about $20. Electronic Master- 
Mind may also be played 
solitaire; the machine picks 
the code and you, old sleuth, 
get ten tries to break it. 

If you fail, of course, the 
machine never tells. 


AS THE WORM TURNS 
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fish bait from ChemSource, Inc. (P.O. Box 597, Suffern, New 
York 10901), and out snakes a wormlike bait that's ready for 
the hook in about 15 minutes. Instant Worm sells for $4.95 per 
can, postpaid, and comes in three colors and flavors: red is 
shellfish, gold is bacon and worm-colored is cheese. You don't 
fish? Just drop a few wigglers down your best girl's dress. 


CALL TO ARMS 
Every year, it seems, Wide 
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the national arm-wrestling 
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SONG OF INJAH 
If you weep at the death of Gunga Din and like 
your sundowner served by a native girl with 

a ruby in her nose, you'll undoubtedly dig a book 
just out from St. Martin's Press called Raj: 4 
Scrapbook of British India 1877-1947, by Charles 
Allen. Old prints of pigsticking contests, 

photos of polo played at Dacca in 1904, ancient 
ads for sola helmets and pugarees—by 

gad, men, it’s all down there in bloody black 
and white, Look for Raj at your bookstore; 

it’s curkup material for a cold winter night. 


READING MATTER FOR THE ROAD 
Although the cover of each issue of Mother 
Trucker News, a hip monthly tabloid that 
covers the whole 18-whecler scene from the 
latest rigs to record and movie reviews, says 
it's “For Professional Drivers," we have a 
sneaking hunch that there are a lot of arm- 
chair gear jammers out there who dig it, too. 
For a year's subscription, just send $7.50 to 
Mother Trucker News, P.O. Box 6391, San 
Bernardino, California 92412. Read it the 
next time you come in from beaver patrol. 


261 


PLAYBOY 


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FALLING ANGEL 


(continued from page 258) 


“I tucked the folded 50 into his shirt pocket. ‘You 


and Ulysses Simpson Grant go have a party. 


22 


Bio M 

"What did he look like?" 
Just a man, Ordinary." 
Was he on the heavy side? Slovenly? 
By that 1 mean а sloppy dresser, wi 
kled blue suit and shoes that need 


shine: closely cropped hair starting to go 
gray? 

Epiphany said, "Kind blue eyes. You 
notice them first. 

"Did he say his name was Angel?" 


Margaret Krusemark’s voice betrayed а 
strident urgency 

“Yes. Harry Angel.” 
"What did he w 
He's looking for Johnny 

“Why 

“He didn't tell me why. 
detecti 

“A policeman?” 

(o, а private detective. What is this 


гое." 


Неѕ а 


re was a faint clinking of china 
and then Margaret Krusemark said, “I'm 
actly sure. He was here, pretending 
to be a client. 1 know this is going to 
seem very rude, but | must ask you to 
leave now. 1 have to go out myself. Из 
urgent, Em afraid. 

you think were 
^s voice broke on 


danger?" 
that final 


word. 

“I don't know what to think. If Jona- 
than's back, 
ere was a man killed 
yesterday," Epiphany blurted. 
of mine. He knew Momma 
too. Mr. Angel had been a 
questions. 

A chair scraped against the parquet 
floor. “Гус got to go Margaret 

k said. "Come, ГЇЇ get your 
"ll ride down together.” 

There was the sound of approaching 
footsteps. 1 pulled the contact mike from 
the door and sprinted the length of the 
hallway like a wide receiver in the 
g on to the banister for bal- 
k the fire stairs four and five 
steps at a time. 

I ran down all the way to the empty 
lobby. Gasping, I paused to check the in- 
dicators over the elevators. The one on 
the left was going up, its partner coming 
down. Either way, they would be there 
in а moment. 

I ran across Seventh Avenue without 
paying heed to the пас, On the other 
side, I loitered near the entrance to the 
Osborn Apartments, wheezing like an 
emphysema victim. 


id Johnny, 


now 


E 
piphany and the Krusemark woman 
me out of the building together and 


walked half a block uptown to 57th 
Street. 1 strolled along the other side of 
the avenue, keeping abreast of them. 
When the light changed, Epiphany 
started across in my direction. М et 
Krusemark waved frantically at. passing 
taxis. A new Checker cab approached 
with its roof light on and 1 flagged it 
down, climbing inside before Epiphany 
had me spotted. 

"Where to, mister?" a roundi 
driver asked as he dropped the flag. 

"Like to make a deuce above what it 
says on the meter 

“Whatcha got 

“Tail job. Pull over for a minute in 
front of the Russian Tea Room." He did 
as I asked and turned around in his seat 
to check me out. I gave him a glimpse of 
the honorary bution pinned to my wallet 
and said, “See the dame in the tweed 
coat get into the hack in [ront of 
Carnegie Hall? Don’t lose her.” 

A piece of cake. 

The other cab made an abrupt U turn 
on 57th. We stayed half a block behind 
as they turned downtown on Seventh 
and tailed them across town to the 
Chrysler Building. 1 paid my driver and 
started across Lexington Avenue. Mar- 
garet Krusemark was nowhere in sight. 
Tt didn't matter. I knew where she was 
headed. Passing through the revolving 
doors, 1 checked the directory in the 
angular marble-and-chromium lobby. 
Krusemark Maritime, Inc., was on the 
45th floor. 

I stepped off the elevator and spotted 
a window washer on his way to work. He 
was bald and middle-aged, with the re 
tread nose of a retired boxer. He ambled 
down the gleaming corridor whistling 
last summer's big hit, Volare, a half tone 
flat. He wore dirty green coveralls and 
his safety harness dangled like a pair of 
stened suspenders. 

Sot a minute, budd: I called, and 
he paused mid-note and regarded me 
with lips still pursed, as if waiting for 
kiss. "Bet you can't tell me whose picture 
is on a fifty-dollar bill." 
‘OK, wise guy; it's Thomas Jefferson." 

/ou're wi А 
‘So? Big deal. What's this all about?” 

I got out my wallet and removed the 
folded half-century note I carry lor emer- 
gencies and occasional bribes and held 
it up so he could see the denomination. 
“I thought maybe you'd like to find out 
who the lucky President was.” 

The window washer cleared his throat 
and blinked. "Are you off your rocker or 
something?” 


ced 


“Rent me your outfit for an hour and 
take a walk. Go downstairs and buy your- 
sell a beer.” 

He rubbed the top of his head, al- 
though it needed no further. polishing. 
"You are some kinda nut, ain'tchaz" 
There was a hint of real admiration in 
his voice. 

What difference does it make? АШ Т 
want is to rent your rig, no questions 
asked. You make half a yard for sitting 
on your duff for an hour. How сап you 
beat that?” 

ОК. You got a deal, buddy. Long as 


you're giving it away, I'm a guy who'll 


take 

The window washer jerked his head 
for me to follow and led me back down 
the corri to the custodial closet. 
“Leave all п you're 
done with it,” he said, unstrapping his 
safety harness and. peeling off the dirty 
coveralls. 

I hung my overcoat and suit jacket on 
top of à mop handle and pulled on the 
coveralls. They were stiff and smelled 
faintly of ammonia, like pajamas after 
an org 

I had the window washer show me 
how to use the safety harness. It seemed 
quite simple. "You aint planning on 
going outside, аге you?" he asked, 

“You kidding? I just want to play a 
gag on a ladylriend. She's a receptionist 
on this floor. 
e with me," the window washer 
said. "Just leave the stuff in the closet." 

I tucked the folded 50 into his shirt 
pocket. "You and Ulysses Simpson Grant 
go He sauntered off 
whistling, 

I removed my .38 before stashing the 
attaché case under the concrete sink. I 
slipped the litle fiveshot into my cover- 
alls and transferred the contact mike to 
the other pocket. Bucket and brush in 
hand, 1 strolled down the corridor to- 
ard the impressive bronze-and-glass en- 
ance of Krusemark Ma: ne, Inc. 

. 

The receptionist looked right through 
me as I crossed the carpeted lobby be- 
n glass-cased tanker models and 
pership prins. Beyond was a long 
with offices opening off either 
side. 1 ambled along, swinging my buck- 
et. At the end of the hall was a large 
ere а pert blonde sliced enve- 
lopes behind ап L-shaped desk. Off to 
one side was a polished-mahogany door. 
At eye level, raised bronze letters said, 
ETHAN KRUSEMARK. 

The blonde nced up and smiled, 
the stack of mail beside her a foot high. 
My hopes of being alone with the con- 
tact mike went right out the window, an 
image I would soon regret. 

The blonde ignored me, busy with her 
simple task. Clipping the bucket to my 
belt harness, I pulled open a window 


263 


PLAYBOY 


and closed my eyes. My teeth were chat- 
tering, but it wasn't from the rush of 
cold air. 

1 sat backward on the sill and hooked 
one strap of the safety harness to the out- 
side casing. There was only the thickness 
of glass separating me from the blonde 
inside, but she might as well have been a 
million miles away. I switehed hands and 
clipped in the other strap. 
re was barely room for my toes on 
the narrow ledge. 1 pushed down the 
window and the comforting sound of 
the teletypes inside was lost in the gusty 
wind. I told myself not to look down. 
That was the first place I looked. 

The shadowed canyon of 42nd Street 
yawned beneath me, pedestrians and 
traffic reduced to ant specks and craw 
metallic beetles. I felt like а moun 
climber on an incredible first ascent. 
Several floors above, radiatorcap gar- 
goyles jutted from the corners of the sky- 
scraper and, beyond them, the building's 
stainless-steel spire tapered into the sun- 
light, shining like the ice-clad summit of 
an unconquered peak. 

It was time to make шу move. T un- 
clipped the right-hand harness strap, 
attaching it to the same fastening that 
held the other. Then I unclipped the in- 
ner strap and reached across to the casing 
on the next window over and clipped 
into the fastener there. 

Secured to both windows, I stepped 
across with my left foot. I looked into 
the office of Ethan Krusemark as T 
tened the left-hand safety strap to the 
opposite casing of his window, His desk 
was a vast, oval slab of Pentelic marble, 
bare except for an executive six-buiton 
telephone and а patined bronze statuette 
of Neptune waving his trident above the 
waves. 

Krusemark and his daughter sat on a 
Jong beige couch set against the far wall. 
He looked like his portrait: а ruddy- 
faced, aging pirate crowned with a mass 
of well-combed silver hair. To my way of 
thinking. the resemblance was more 
Daddy Warbucks than Clark Gable. Mar- 
garet Krusemark still wore the upside- 
down gold pentacle. Occasionally, one of 
them looked straight at me. I brushed 
soapy water onto the glass in front of 
my face, 

1 got the contact mike out of my cover- 
alls and plugged in the earphone. Wrap- 
ping the instrument in a 1 
pressed. it to the glass and pretended to 
wipe the window. Their voices sounded 
so clear and sharp, I could. easily have 
heen sitting next to them on the couch. 

Krusemark was speaking: "You're sure 
he's a detective 
angeline Proudfoot's daughter said 
he was. He knows enough to have gotten 
to her.” 

“What about the doctor in Pou 
keepsie? 
le's dead. 


ide. I 


Tt happened earlier this week.” 
Then we'll never know if the detec- 
tive spoke with him or not.” 

‘I don't like it, Father. Not after all 

these years. Angel knows too much al- 
ready. Why not get rid of him?” 
This town is crawling with two-bit 
private It’s not Angel we need to 
worry about but the man who hired hin 
ret Krusemark gripped her fa- 
er's hand in both of hers. "Angel will 
be back, For the horoscope. 
Good. Play him along. You're a clever 
girl. Slip a drop of something in his tea 
We must know the name of his client. 
We can't let Angel die until we find out 
who he's working for.” Krusemark stood 
up. "I have several important mectings 
coming up this afternoon, Meg. Call me 
as soon as you hear from the detective. I 
picked up the art of persuasion in the 
Orient. We'll sec if I've lost my touch." 

“Thank you, Father." 

"Come, ГЇЇ walk vou out. What are 
your plans for the rest of the day? 

"I thought I might go over to Saks and 
do some shopping. After that——" The 
rest of it was lost as the heavy mahogany 
door closed behind them. 

I stuffed the rag-wrapped contact mike 
into my coveralls and opened the win- 
dow. 1 unclipped the safety harness and 
swung my trembling legs inside the rela- 
tive safety of Krusemark's office. The risk 
had paid olf; playing window washer was 
a picnic compared with finding out 
about Krusemark's Oriental artistry first- 
hand 

I shut the window and glanced around, 
As much as I wanted to do some snoop- 
n't time. 


ing, I knew there wa 


On my way out, I blew a loud kiss at 
the receptionist. The face she made sug- 
gested a mouthful of caterpillar guts, but 
two salesmen cooling their heels in 
matching Barcelona chairs thought it 
was real cute. 

I did a quickchange number in the 
broom closet and left the coveralls and 
safety harness crammed into the dented 
bucket. There was no si 
Krusem: 


k out on the street. She had 
to Saks and I figured 
ht а cab. Deciding to give her 
пре her mind, | cut across 


time to ch 
Lexington to Grand Central 
I detoured down the ramp to the 


Oyster Bar and ordered a dozen blue 
points on the half shell. Twenty minutes 
later, I pushed my plate back and headed 
for a phone. | dialed Margaret 
Krusemark’s number and let it ring ten 
times before hanging up. She was safe 
at Saks. 

The shuttle vain hauled my mollusk- 
stuffed carcass over to Times Square, 
where I caught an uptown BMT local to 
57th Street. I called Margaret Kruse- 
mark's apartment from the phone booth 
on the corner and again got no answer. 
The lobby was empty. I went straight to 


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the fire stairs. There was no percer 
in being recognized by elevator operators. 
When 1 got to Margaret. Krusemark's 
door, I was breathing hard and my heart 
hammered like a metronome in presto. 
The hallway was deserted. 1 opened my 
attaché case and pulled on the rubber 
surgeon's gloves. The lock was a standard 
make and the third skeleton key T tried 
did the trick. I stepped inside and closed 
1 me. The smell of ether 
It hung in the air, 
volatile and c. bringing back 
memories of the ward. I got my .38 out 
of my overcoat and edged along the wall 
of the shadowed foye 
Margaret Krusemark hadn't gone shop- 
ping, after all. She was lying on her back 
in the sunlit living room, spread out 
across the low collee table under all those 
potted palms. The couch was pushed 
over against the wall, so that she was all 
alone in the center of the rug like a 
figure on an altar. 
Her peasant blouse was torn open and 
her tiny breasts were pale and not at all 
unpleasant to look at except for the 
ragged incision that split her chest from 
a point below the diaphragm to midway 
up her sternum. The wound brimmed 
with blood and red тіше ran down 
across her ribs and puddled on the 
tabletop 
1 put my gun away and touched my 
finger tips to the side of her throat 
"Through the thin latex, I could feel she 
was still warm. Her features were com- 


the door bel 
was overpowerin 


тот 


posed, almost as if she were only sleep- 
ing, and something very much like a 
smile lingered on her lips. 

I found the murder weapon under the 
coffee table. An Aztec sacrificial knife 
from Margaret Krusemark's own collec- 
tion, the bright obsidian blade dulled 
with drying blood. 1 didn't touch it. 
There was no sign of any struggle. A 
wrinkled prayer rug near the entrance 
showed where she'd been dragged. into 
the living room. Carefully, almost loving- 
ly, the killer had lifted her onto the table 
and moved the furniture back so there'd 
be lots of space to work in. 

Over by the tall window, between a 
philodendron and a delphinium, 1 made 
one small discovery. Resting in the basin 
of a tall bronze Hellenic tripod was a 
glistening lump of blood-soaked muscle 
about the size of a misshapen tennis ball 
It looked like something the dog might 
have dragged in and I stared at it a long 
time before I knew what it was. Valen- 
tine’s Day would no longer seem th 
same. Ir was Margaret Krusemark's heart. 

After a bit of poking around, I found 
an ethersaturated rag in a woven wicker 
wastebasket in the foyer. 1 left it there 
for the homicide boys to play with. Let 
them take it downtown with the dead 
meat and run it through the lab. Ther 


be reports to file in triplicate. Tha 
their job, not mine. 
In the bedroom, the bed was unmade, 


“Welcome, ma chérie, to a particularly disgraceful 
episode in French history.” 


PLAYBOY 


268 


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rumpled sheets stained with sex. The 
witch was not without her warlocks. In a 
small adjoining bathroom, I found the 
plastic case to her diaphragm. It was 
empty. If she got laid this morning, she 
must still be wearing it. The boys from 
downtown would find that, too. 

Margaret Krusemark's medicine. cabi- 
net overflowed. Aspirin. tooth powder. 
milk of magnesia and small vials of pre- 
scription drugs competed for space with 
jars of foul-smelling powders marked by 
obscure alchemical symbols. 
inned up at me from 
the top of a Kleenex box. There was a 
and pestle on the counter next to 
Tampax. A double-cdged dagger, a 
copy of Vogue, a hairbrush and four fat, 
black candles crowded the lid of the 
toilet tank. 

There was a small alcove off the bed 
room where she did her work. A filing 
cabinet crammed with customers’ horo- 
scopes meant nothing to me. I looked 
under the Fs for Favorite and the Ls 
bling without success. There was 
1 row of reference texts and a 
globe. The books were propped 
led alabaster casket about the size 
ved on the lid was a 


As I searched among the disordered 
papers on the desktop, a small printed 
card edged in black caught my atten- 
tion, The symbol of an inverted five- 
pointed star inscribed within a circle was 
printed at the top. Below the talisman, 
it said sissa NIGER in ornate caps. The 
text was also in Latin. At the bottom 
were the numerals ш. xxi. мсмых. It 
was a date. Palm Sunday, [our days aw 
I slipped the card inside my attaché ca: 

Most of the other papers on the desk 
were horoscopes in progress. I glanced at 
them without interest and found onc 
with my name written on the top. 
Wouldn't Lieutenant Sterne like to get 
his hands on that? I should have set fire 
to it, or flushed it down the toilet, but, 
instead, like a dummy, I tucked it into 
my attaché са 

Finding the horoscope made me think 
to check Margaret. Krusemark's desk cal- 
endar. There I was on Monday, the 16th 
“Н. Angel, 1:30 rx.” I ripped the page 
free and put it with the other stuff in my 
case. Today's page on the desk calendar 
showed an appointment for 5:30. My 
watch was a [ew minutes fast, but 20 
after was close enough. 

On the way out, I left the apartment 
door slightly ajar 
find the body and call the police. I 
wanted no part of this mess. Fat chance! 
1 was in it up to my neck. - 


Someone else could 


The concluding installment of this 
excerpt from William Hyortsberg's forth- 
coming novel “Falling Angel” will ap- 
pear in our November issue. 


WHY OUR OIL 
SHOULD BE STANDARD 
EQUIPMENT 
ON ALL SMALLER CARS. 


Smaller cars demand | 
even more of a motor oil 


Castrol the strength it 


than big cars do. Their 4 н — 


needs to keep cleaning and 
lubricating the narrow 


and 6 cylinder engines run | QUAKER STATE 


passages in smaller 


at considerably higher 
revs throughout their Eon 


engines. (And if Castrol 
can do all this for smaller 


entire performance range. 


engines, imagine what it 


So there’s more heat and = 
friction in the engine. 


N 


can do for bigger, less 
demanding ones.) 


All this can cause 


N 


To prove how good our 


extra wear, tear, and ‘shear’ 
(thinning out of the oil)— 
what engineers refer to as 
“viscosity breakdown? As 
the viscosity of the oil breaks down it 
loses more and more of its ability to pro- 
tect a smaller car's engine from its own 
self-destructive tendencies. 

That’s why Castrol is so essential for 
smaller cars. 

Unlike ordinary oils Castrol doesn't 
break down. After an incredible expendi- 
ture of time and money Castrol engineers 
developed a unique motor oil formulation 
using a special vis- a 
cosity modifier that 18 
prevents Castrol from — / 
thinning out under 
intense heats and 
pressures. 

Then they added 
additives and detergents 
that keep sludge from 
forming as the oil cools 
down. Additives that give 


To prove that Castrol is better suited 
for smaller, hotter, higher-revving engines 
we tested Castrol against Quaker State 
and Pennzoil. As the graph above plainly 
shows, only Castrol didn't break down. 


oil really is, we tested 
Castrol against the two 
leading brands: Quaker 
State and Pennzoil. 

The test was conducted in a labora- 
tory by anindependent testing firm. Each 
one of the oils was an SAE 10W-40. 

After the equivalent of roughly 2,000 miles 
they found that while Quaker State and 
Pennzoil had both shown significant 
breakdown, Castrol hadn’t broken down 
at all. 

So while there are lots of oils to 
choose from, only one should be standard 

equipment on smaller 
(к=з Жы cars. Castrol —the oil 
that doesn’t break down. 

After all, if your 
motor oil breaks down, 
who knows what could 
L/S [44 break down next? 


= Castrol 


THE OIL ENGINEERED FOR 
SMALLER CARS. 


PLAYBOY 


270 


BIG WH EELS (continued from page 184) 


“As good as your La France looks going formal at 
night, it performs chores during the day.” 


chrome glisteni 


bencath those gold 
decals and the red paintz With those bla 
ing looks and elegant features, your La 
France will be just as comfortable going 
formal. When you have this beauty in 
your stable, it will be on the go often, 
formal and informal, for you'll have to 
be prepared to be the chauffeur for large 
theater parties and other get-togethers. 
But chauffeuring will be a pleasure as you 
move that 25,000-pound, almost-30-[oot- 
long truck through town: Гог, despite its 
‚ it has a turning radius of a mere 25 
feet, with the 265-hp diesel meeting all 
your power demands, driving or pump. 
ng (as it must, lo be approved by the 
u Underwriters’ Laboratories. How 
many people can claim to have а vehicle 
that is ULL. approved?). Yes, you and 
your friends will be quite the envious 
sight as you drive through town—gowns 
and tails blowing in the breeze—and 
head for the opening of the opera season, 
pod as your La France looks going 
at night, it performs chores dur- 
lay, such as filling the pool in a 
hurry or helping vou wash itself, as well 
as the rest of your stable or even your 
house. It will feel right at home, too, 
when you perform certain civic duties, 
such as feiching errant kites and kittens 
from trees. But such tasks cleave easily 
10 the successful, respected man. 

A solid and concerned citizen of the 
community should abo lave a vehicle 


o 


that caters to (hat aspect of him and, at 
the same time. is useful around the 
grounds. When the frost thaws and the 
scars of the long winter are visible, you 
may feel the need for a little landscaping 
or home improvement. What could be 
benter for you than an Autocar dump 
truck or а Crane Carrier Company ce 
ment mixer or, if you're not too strapped 
for money, both? (It would be well wort 
the litte more than 5100.000 to get the 
two.) The regal Autocar, with its classic 
hood and angular three-piece fenders, 
would elegantly grace anyone's garage. 
In addition to being useful for poring 
new collection of bonsai trees and top- 
soil for the front yard, or perhaps fresh 
clay for the tennis courts, that massive 
Au 
quit work-horse Cummins engine, has 
multiple uses for the sharp-think 
man. И can certainly be handy for c 
way the trash after a party or even for 
taking home а [ew guests who have spent 
a little too much time at your La France 
pumper. And with its towering g 
clearance and low gearing, you'll have 
no trouble driving everybody downtown 
after a кочоо snowfall. 

The С.С.С. cement mixer, distinctive 
with its utili 
also never runs out of worth. What with 
pouring concrete for the new pool or 
redoing the driveway or patio, it won't 
even be breathing hard. And think of 


sear dump truck, with its justwon't 


“Frankly, 1 didn't know whata real orgasm was until 
1 discovered tusks!” 


how easily it can mix up a batch of 
cocktails, cither to serve on the spot or 
be pumped from the La France: or you 
can save time and mix them on your 
way to a BYOB party. For a quiet, 
relaxing night at home, what better way 
to be lulled to sleep than by its soothing, 
rhythmic rumble? 

To round out your stable of highly 
personal vehides, you will need a small 
knockabout everyday vehicle for run 
downtown or stopping at your tobacco- 
і After all, when the weather be 
tween you and the shopping center gets 
a little sloppy and the craving for an 
enchilada comes upon you, there's no 
sense getting muck all over the alumi- 
num wheels of your cabover and it's 
foolish to haul the dump truck across 
town for a boule of cognac. A knock 
about is therefore a necessity. Especially 
one that can carry not only you and your 
purchases but also а friend or two and 
theirs. And what more perfect balance 
between practicality and luxury could 
one hope for than a Cadillac station 
wagon 

Few people realize that America's most 
noted auto ma ‚їп addition to its 
waditional line of personal cars, a station 
wagon tl 
of its brothers 
sumptuously lus 
ily carry 


tremendous, 
2o that 


yet has a 
rious carge 
can another passenger. You 
should definitely order from a local sup- 
plier а special rear passenge пе 
(they come in an infinite selection of 
styles and colors, ranging from Spa 
pine to brass-handled, satin-cusl 
double«doored solid-mahog 
neatly fit into the re 

Despite being a knockabout and light- 
cargo-carrying vehicle, this wagon, which 
comes in basic black, features all the 
appointments (including rear-window 
curtains) and technologically advanced 
features that have made the Cadillac 
name synonymous with fine motoring. 
Foremost of these is the extremely quiet, 
most tomblike silence of the ride that 
can best be filled with your tavorite 
organ recitals or Gregorian chants played 
on Cadillac's superior tape deck. 

This is the vehicle for th restful, 
solitary afternoon drives in the rain. And. 
when you decide you no longer want to 
be alone, all you need do is turn on your 
headlights, Suddenly, you will have a 
following. 

The Cadillac station wagon has the 

kind of strength and durability to last 
you a lifetime and a week. After all, 
must remember, а hearse—as the bro- 
chures insist on calling it—is everyone's 
most favored last vehicle. 
п this collection of diversified yet 
highly striking and practical vehicles, 
cach one bearing the stamp of a welho- 
do, successful man, you should be fully 
equipped to handle all situations— 
motively, at least, 


conta. 


ned, 


ny models) to 
r of your Cadillac. 


ito 


PLAYBOY 


272 


GIRLS OF THE PAC IO 


(continued from page 163) 


“The Mall in the center of the Arizona campus draws 
scantily clad undergrads all year long.” 


bozo—we decided to divide this pictorial 
into two installments, because there were 
just too many lovely s to feature 
adequately in one issuc—920 is about all 
anybody cin be expected to handle in 
опе sitting. 

Anyhow, in case all this motivates you 
to abandon colder climes, pack a bag, 
rent a Conestoga and head for the Santa 
Fe Trail or the Oregon Trail to further 
your education, so to speak, here's the 
poop on the five colleges: 

+ The University of Southern Cali- 
fornia (Los Ап the first few 
weeks at USC, cach entering freshman is 
lly asked whether he/she has bought 
"Daily, huh?" the frosh 
inevitably asks, assaying the reasons for 
needing protection that often. Turns out 
Daily Trojan is the name of the campus 
aper. Great little joke, huh? As a 
of fact, members of USC's athletic 


1cams are called Trojans, too, but that's 
a horse of another color. What сап you 
expect from a school that schedules vir- 
tually no class y? As a result of 
this three-day-weekend situation, Thurs- 
day night is bust-out eve for USC under- 
grads, If they aren't joining their UCLA 
brethren in Westwood, you'll probably 
find them closer to home, usually at The 
901 Club (ко pinball шас nd lots 
of suds). The welltrodden Thursday- 
night path will lead you to Tommy's on 
Beverly Boulevard for a Tommyburger— 
th chili (it beats swallowing gold- 
and sun, the USC crowd 
genera all heads for the beach at Santa 
Monica. While the student population is 
roughly three men to every woman, don't 
despair—that figure includes the largely 
male medical-school enrollment, which 
isn't even on the same campus. Students 


“We'll cash in on the current sci-fi craze! Yow ll 
get gang-banged by a bunch of Martians!” 


live in university residence halls, in pri- 
vate apartments or in university-owned 
aparuments in the Student Community. 

+ Stanfc ity (Palo Alto, Cali- 
fori 
beautiful campuses in the country. 
on-campus woods and greens 
surpassed only by its bikin 
who gather around Lake 


tanford has onc of the most 
Its 


ned the bur last 
spring the water returned in time for the 
1 Aqua Follies Festival, а water- 


za that tunel out to 


majoring in a у 
bar is The (known as The O), in 
nearby Menlo Park. Another 
beer bar is The Dutch Goos 


student atmo, try The Bri 
Club—for future bank presidents only. 
For those with a taste for the rustic and 
a sense of history, The Alpine Beer Gar- 
den is onc of the oldest hangouts, It used. 
to be called Rizzotti's and, for that r 
son, is still Known as Zot's. Zovs is off in 
the country а way; sometimes horses 
tethered out front Stanford's current 
"student population is 41 percent female, 
but we hear that percentage is rising. 
Most of the female undergrads live in 
deems, most of which are coed. Weekend 
8 таке Stantordites to Squaw Val- 
ley, Yosemite National Park, Reno and 
San Francisco. The two biggest on- 
campus activities seem to be Frisbee 
1 going to the flicks—there 
lots of theaters and film-society off 
+ The University of Arizona (Tuco 
With Tucson’s sunny desert clin 
no marvel that the University ol 
excels in astronomy and environmental 
research. Its proximity to the Indian 
ruins of the Hohokam, Mogollon and 
cultures has contributed to its 
excellent anthropology department. The 
sunny clime has also created a modern 
culture of sun worshipers worthy of 
study; the Mall in the center of the 
campus draws scantily clad undergrads 
Jong. Rituals, beyond basi 

include the / nt Rite of the 
Frisbee and guitar pla , not to men- 
tion elementary pair bonding. The stu- 
dent population is about ha 


female (we don't mean androgynous) and 
js scattered among sity dorms, 
frats, sororities and apartments. Students 


are generally very outdoors oriented. 
frequently drive to Sabino 
which is about 15 miles north 
pus, if they are not swimming in one of 
the three university pools. We're not 
sure what it means, but one of the most 
crowded campus bars is Dooley's, form 
ly a Baptist church. It’s the staid, V 
torian-looking chapel at the corner of 
University and Eudid—you can't miss 


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A tape deck that thinks, a turntable steady as a rock, а receiver that protects itself, and more. 


In your dream you hear 
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Impossible? Only if yc 
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component. Once, perhaps 
But today no one has a 
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excellence. You'll find the 
Optonica™ name on entire 
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with innovations—our own 


new circuits and features— 
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In a dream you might 
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fantastic deck even without 
ils own computer 

In the same dream you 
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You might furnish your 
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Now the same source also 
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Listen to a system with 
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[OPTONICA 


it. Other favorite watering holes are 
Gentle Ве nd The Bum Steer 

* Oregon State University (Corvallis): 
Officials of Oregon State like to call their 
school “the friendly and scholarly cam- 
pus." The local icon of friendliness is the 
mattress that is suspended from the ceil 
ing of Mother's Mattress Factory, а fa- 
vorite undergrad tippling spot. Other 
hangouts are the Oregon Museum Pub 
and Wes's Lounge, a disco. To be a suc- 
cess with the college crowd. a bar has to 
have a Foosball game. Aside from bar- 
hopping, the most popular after-class 
pastime involves Oregon State's Experi- 
mental College Program, a loose amal- 
gam of noncredit, tuition-free. lifestyle 
courses including belly dancing, yoga, 
dog obedience, the fine art of wine and 
your basic North Woods arts and crafts. 
The student population numbers almost 
14,000 undergrads, 40 percent fem: 
The Willamette River, on the cast 
of the campus, brings young romancers 
together [or boating and sparking, not 
necessarily in that order. The campus has 
а feeling of isolation апа. because of that, 
students have а sense of mutual reliance. 
They also leave town a lot—a trip to the 
beach at Newport (one hour away) is fre- 
quently followed by clam chowder at 
Mo's, background Гог onc ol the scenes in 
the Henry Fonda—Paul Newman movie 
Sometime a Great Nolion, Winter calls 
for skiing in the Cascade Range—Hoo- 
doo Bowl or Mount Bachelor. 

* Washington State. University (Pull- 
man): Some students at WSU claim 
that their school is the number-one per- 
capita drinking school in the nation. We 
haven't эссп the alleged study, but we've 
heard that WSU students are inclined to 
make frequent excursions down to Boyer 
Park on the Snake River with kegs of 
beer, Certainly, social life seems to re 
volve around the suds, Most of the public 
abibing takes place in Moscow, Idaho, 
t miles away, where the drinking age 
J. In Moscow, the place to be 
y night is Rathskellers Inn—it's got a 
live band and a dance floor and is usually 
packed to the rafters after ten rar. For 
those over 21, closer-to-campus high spots 
include Rico's Smokchouse, The 
Сопаре (а frat hangout) and The К; 
good for beer, dinner and watching its 
projection TV. Most students. (WSU is 
13 percent female) live in dorms, but 
there is a big push to get off campus 
into apartments. For a number o£ years, 
students at WSU have observed a rite 
called National Outdoor Intercourse Day 
(May eighth). Sleeping bags turn up а 
most everywhere on campus and resound- 
ing through the hills is the pagan chant: 


le 


“Hooray, hooray for the cighth of 
May 
National Outdoor Intercourse Day!” 


| 4l Heineke* 


— 


The year-round dark beer. 


Glass after glass— there is only one dark beer that gives you 
this consistently wholehearted character and great taste, any 
and every time. Its Heineken Special Dark Beer. Brewed and 
bottled in Holland. Heineken tastes tremendous. No wonder 
its Americas #1 imported beer. Exclusive U.S. Importers: 
Van Munching & Co., N.Y., N.Y. 


INNER GAME OF SEX 


(continued from page 152) 


“We'll just be lying there after the first time, 
and all of a sudden, ГЇЇ be ready again. 


درو 


PLAYBOY 


himself worrying about whether or not 
he'll be able to get her into bed in an 
hour or two. Whar he should do is bring 
his thoughts gently back to the food and 
the wine and the conversation of here 
nd now. If he doesn't keep his mind 
on now, there may not be 


experi 
trates the rewards of being 
about the future. In his early 205, he'd 
had only four bed partners in his life 
rned that, except on rare 
occasions, he was capable, at most, of 
two orgasms a night. Then he started an 
with a woman who. for most of 
ied life, had had sex 
month. She thought anything her ра 
ner might do would be prodigious. The 
man didn't care whether or not he im- 
pressed her in bed 

He found himself making love with 
his friend three times a night just about 
every time they went to bed. His low-key 
tude relieved him of the pressure to 
perform, and that put him in touch with 
feelings he hadn't been aware of. He 
ned or even expected his im- 
ormance. It simply happened, 
like inspiration, “We'll just be lying 
there after the first time,” 
"maybe talking or just рец 
And all of a sudden, ГИ be ri 


bout once 


And even then, l'm not sure I'm going 
to come. But I always do. Again and 
ters and Johnson c pit of 


focusing on climax the “end-point 
lease orientation." As an antidote, they 
recommend “sensate focus.” You should 
direct your awareness toward the pleas- 
ant sensations you're experiencing now, 
without having а goal in mind. Sensate 
focus has cured impotent men and non 
orgasmic women. Told by the therapist 
to let the partner stroke and massage 
him or her—not touching the genita 
and not trying to have sex—many a man, 
no longer wondering whether he will or 
won't get a Пардон woman, 
no longer anxious about whether or not 
she will come, finds 
that hasn't [elt 
chill becomes a 
good as hi, the gre 
Fifties, when the height of a Saturd: 
ight’s pl was to spend hours neck- 
arked car till our lips were 
and swollen. 


w life in a body 
as, The 
most 


lacerated Those were 


es, but 


276 


be invested in а week of fantasies. Screw- 
ing was out of the question. We were 
thus spared the blight of goal-oriented 
here were some men, Masters and 
son have observed. who did their 
basic training іп whorehouses, 
the lad telling them 
to hurry it up. If they took the lesson too 
much to heart, they became premature 
j nother malfunction arising 


E Î dí appr 
happening. 


E 

A man who tries to retard his orgasm 
is thinking too much about the fut 
Holding back, 1 


all movement when 
s long been consid- 
le sexual sophisti- 
ion. But sometimes the result isn't as 
g to either party as it is sup- 
posed to be. Going with the flow often 
works better; sometimes the man's v 
orous, uninhibited thrusting will bring 
оп the woman's orgasm. Sometimes he 
will have a second or third erection and 
е longer to reach his second or 
third. orgasm, thereby greatly extending 
his partner's pleasure. Nature has 
of taking care of us when we doi 
to fool her. 

Playing this kind of inner game in 
which the obstacles to be overcome are 
one’s own mental states, Gallwey ex 
yer from the fr 


nt try 


true nature as it reveals 
In the Orient, 
means of self-aware- 
ange as it might seem in 
our own culture, in which sex is often 
seen on of our animal 
side, which is thought to be lower than 
our mental side—as if the mind were not 
as much a product of animal evolution 
s the hand or the stomach, One of the 
sacred. stories of India tells how the god 
Krishna made love to 16,000 girls in one 
night. Hindu and Buddhist holy pictures 
frequently show the gods and. goddesses 
in sexual union. 

Janwillem v 
nt to Ja 
tells of a Zen monk ca 
ile tha 


ness is not as st 


as am 


ig, а Dutch- 
to study Zen, 
led Bobo Roshi— 
Шу as Master 
Fuck. U! hieve satori alter years 
of meditating on his koan, he climbed 
over a wall of his monastery and wa 

dered through the streets of Kyoto. A 
prostitute in the Willow Quarter took 


Ме tc 


monk for so 
ppen- 


him in. Having lived as 
long, he didn't realize what was 
ing till she started to undress him: 


Then she took him to her bath, 
that’s the custom here. Your shoul- 
ders are m nd vou are dried 
with a clean towel and they talk to 
you. Slowly you become very excited 
and when she feels vou are ready, 
she es you to the bedroom. He 
must have been quite excited. after 
so many years of ng. At the 
moment he went into her, he solved 
his koan. He had an enormous sa- 
lori, one of those very rare satoris 
which are described їп our books, 
not a little understanding which can 
be decpened later but the lot at 
once, an explosion. which tears you 
to pieces and you think the world 
has come to an end, that you can 
fill the emptiness of the universe in 
every possible sphere. When he left 
the woman, he was а master. 


Sex for the sake of illumination may 
make it sound like a sort of spiritual 
masturbation, Actually, the view of sex 
were exploring makes it impossible to 
be self-centered. The stage fright that 
spoils sex comes from too much concern 
about one’s own standing in the game. 
With the Zen approach, you stop asking 
“How am I doing?" And whe 
stops seeing his lover as his judge or 
competitor, he can enjoy sex all out. 
That will make him a better lover, be- 
cause a person who thoroughly enjoys 
doing something is good at it. He is free 
of the feeling that he has to control or 
impress his partner; he is play 
her, not against or upon her. 

We already have the capacity to enjoy 
sex fully right now. We don't need any 
improvement: we need only to get out of 
our own way. d the end of The 
Inner Game o[ Tennis, Gallwey explains 
that the book shoukl not be taken as a 
manual for sell-improvement: "Admitted- 
ly. much of this book may seem to read 
that way, but speaking as a man who was 
once a compulsive sell-improver, 1 want 
10 make it cl the last thing 1 wish 
to do is encourage any notion that you 
should be any different fro what you 
are right now.” From this point of view, 
we ready perfect just as we а 
M sex seems to lack something, the sdhü- 
tion is not to try harder but to remove 
whatever is blocking it, Many people 
complain that their sexual experiences 
seem unreal to them. They've pushed 
their thinking, worrying Spectator be- 
tween themselves and the wordless, 
thoughtless realm of the Player. That is 
1, because sex should be enjoyed in all 
s here-and-now glory, fun fulness 
and profundity. A change in attitude сап 
help restore delight. 


Tow: 


E 


BY HARVEY Rz AND wiu. ELDER 


19 MISTER 
PORTNOY HERE? 
HE'S WRITING _, 

FOR"SPACE WARS ТГ 
ANO ASKED ME 
To MEET HIM 


THE JOKE'S ON YOU, BABES! I'M REAL. LOOK! REMEMBER KAK-E DOO-T 
HE'S THE ROBOT. BUILT FOR THE FROM "SPACE WARS"? THESE ARE 
BILLION-DOLLAR-MAN SHOW... A ALL THE SAME KAK-E UCO-T...ONE 
ONE-MILLION-DOLLAR FACE, A THREE- FOR TALKING, ONE FOR WALKING. 
MILLION-DOLLAR HEART ANO A FIVE- THEY STUFF STAN THE MIDGET 
MILLION-DOLLAR SCHLONG INSIDE — PORTNOY! 
I MUST GET BACK 
амо STILL то MY? AGENT, SOLLY, 
A THIRD ONE INMAKE-UP. THEY'RE 
FOR KICKING 
AROUND. 


UH, OH! '©$СО©Е ME, STANLEY! 


MAKE ALL 
THE SPECIAL 
EFFECTS FOR 
‘SPACE WARS," 
WHERE ARE 
THOSE 
GIGANTIC 
SPACE- 
SHIPS? 


LET ME SHOW vou A 
THAT'LL BLOW YOUR 


RIGHT UNDER 
OUR NOSE, BABES. THEY'RE MINIATURE 
MODELS, MADE TO LOOK HUGE BY SPECIAL 
EFFECTS. 


SUPERBLY 
DETAILED MODELS 
TAKING YEARS TO BUILD, 
ARE CRAFTED BY THE 
FINEST MODEL- 

MAKERS, 


SPECIAL EFFECT IN THE NEXT STUDIO 
MIND... THEY’ RE DOING IT FOR “GROSS 


ENCOUNTERS,” THE FIRST HIGH-BUOGET, X-RATED 


HOLOGI 
NEW KINI 


IT'S, 


SCI-FI FILM 


RAM? IS THAT SOME 
D OF KINKY ORGY? 


SORT OF A THREE- 


YOU CAN HARDLY? TELL IT 
FROM THE REAL THING. 


IT Has COLOR, 


IT HAS 


DEPTH... 


THROUGH 
SPECIAL EFFECTS, THIS 
MODEL SPACESHIP WILL BE 
COMBINEO IN BATTLE WITH 
THIS MODEL LASER 


MODEL. IT'S 
NOT A 
MODEL! 


IN, BAGES, 
IT'S ONLY A 
HOLOGRAM, 


DON'T LOOK NOW 
PORTNOY, BUT THE HOLOGRAM 1S 
FOLLOWING Us. 


Гм MEL. 
EE | WHEN I SWEEP 
UP AROUND THE 
С HOLOGRAM, 
І GO 
BONKERS! 


f ANNIE! 


THEY'RE 
WAITING 
TO 
MEASURE 
vou. 


PERFECTO! 
THE BUST IS 
VERY CRITICAL TO has MADE FOR 
THIS COSTUME THIS PART! ` 
THIS 
É IS WHY You TH 
NEEDED A UTE INTO 
“GENEROUS AIR OF АЙМ 
тант тнт Bust’? PAIR OF ARMS, 
BOOBS! YOU'LL 


BE A 
SENSASH" 


MIX HER WITH 
THE REAL 
INSECTS THROUGH 
SPECIAL EFFECTS - 
„010 YOU SEE 
THE BUG 
WE TRAINED 
FOR TWO 
WEARS ТО 
BE OUR 


PSST! ANNIE! 
WHILE EVERYONE'S BUSY, COME STEP. 
IN HERE AND LET ME SHOW You THE MOST 


COCKAROACH! 
d ч SPECTACULAR SPECIAL EFFECT 
^ F 


COCKAROACH! 


JUST LEAN 
BACK. YOU'LL FEEL IT 
IN А MINUTE? 
T 
WHAT DOES ў DOESN'T... 
THIS HAVE TO 90 BUT TELL ME, 
тн“ 15 THERE А 
Wir SPACE BETTER SPECIAL 
Y > EFFECT? ee 
E LERPIN' LIZARDS, 
WHAT NOW? ANOTHER 
CIAL EFFECT/? 
ч 7 WoULO чоо Е 
ЭЖ PLEASE HAVE ооа YR 
G^ “SPECIAL EFFECT 
WITHOUT ME? 


BLENDED SCOTCH WHISKY 


WLAN LONGUORE 4 COUIANT, LASTED 
KEITH. SCOTLAND 


© 
oir ктм „б 


Lucky Americans. 
You pay less to go first class. 


Here in Athens, Passport costs as much as other whiskies, but bottle Passport in the U.S.—and pass 
premium scotches. In fact. it's expensive everywhere on the tax and shipping savings to you. So to lucky 
but in America. We use Scotland's most expensive Americans, this superb scotch only tastes expensive. 


Passport Scotch 


GEAR 
BODYWORK 


ave you heard the old joke about the muscular guy at the beach who was showing off his build by lifting a girl 

with each arm? A 97-pound weakling delivers the punch line, “Did you see the dolls on that boob?" Nobody is 
laughing these days at men with good bods: Being in shape gives them more self-confidence; and when they're 

in bed—well, what girl was ever turned on by a paunch? Shaping up, however, requires effort. But the good 

news is that there are some contraptions available to help make the procedure relatively painless. Press on, Arnold! 


Above: Dynavit Computer Exerciser that's distributed by Haden is designed to be programmed with info about your age, sex and 
i will then calculate the amount of exercise you need and monitor your pulse rate as you pedal, from Neiman-Marcus, $2000. 


Above: Wall-mounted SportsMate Rotary Exerciser that's a great tennis 
conditioner, by Nautilus Sports/Medical Industries, $29.95. Right: Uni- 
versal Centurion II/DVR Chest Press provides up to 390 pounds of lift- 
ing resistance, from Swartz, $995, including a bench and instructions. 


RICHARD Ut 


FASHION 
SERVED UP WITH STYLE 


wenty-three-year-old tennis pro Vitas Gerulaitis can play in just about any clothes he wants—thank you very much—and still 
beat the pants off most opponents. What he wears here are fresh from the drawing board of a bright new British talent, Paul 
Smith. The styles combine classic British fabrics and patterns with au courant tailoring. The layered look, you'll notice, also 
continues to score bie points. Game, set, match. — DAVID PLATT 


LAS 
МИМ VEN NÉ e 
NIN OXXX ODO AK 
PILLOW? AIAN 
N 


Ces NAN МУУХУУУУУХУ 


N VN 


NAA ХАА? AK A NINA 


BRUCE LAURAN 


Above: Gerulaitis comes on looking smashing in two Paul Smith outfits. The one featured in the inset photo includes a wool/polyester flannel jacket 
with a shawl collar, $180, a nubby rayon pullover shirt, $54, wool double-pleated slacks, $80, and a canvas belt, $8. The other is a double-breasted 
282 wool herringbone suit, $270, worn over a knit cardigan, $54, matching vest, $42, check-plaid flannel shirt, $50, and iridescent wool knit tie, $8. 


HABITAT. 
REAL CORKERS! 


ow you choose to separate a cork from a wine bottle barman's cork puller, perhaps, that clamps to a table and 
is a matter of personal aesthetics. Some oenophiles can pull the corks from a case of wine faster than you can 
prefer the simple approach: a single-lever corkscrew say André Simon. The Corky is a fun gadget that pumps air 
that lifts the cork (you hope) in one swift motion. into a bottle, eventually popping the cork. But enough. With 
Others opt for something more elaborate: the professional all these bottles open, who'd like a drink? —— —HOLUS WAYNE 


Far left to right: Corky is an easy-to- 
clean hypodermic instrument that 
doesn’t damage cork or wine, from 
Bloomingdale's, $8, with needle cover. 


The Gitano corkscrew (a.k.a. thiev- 


i ing butler) features two blades that 

slip around cork, leaving it undam- 

р | aged, from Bazaar De La Cuisine, $2.95. 

| : France's zigzag corkscrew is the lazy 

y man’s model; its curious design pro- 
vides excellent leverage to lift the 

cork easily, from La Cuisiniere, $7.50. 

The single-lever corkscrew is a favor-‏ سد 
ite of sommeliers; this model has a‏ 

small knife to cut foil. It folds for stor- 

age, from Bazaar De La Cuisine, $2.95. 

The boxwood (also known as the 

counter screw) is, indeed, wood; one 

lever screws into the cork, the other 

one lifts it, from La Cuisiniere, $6.50. 


Below left: This contraption is called a champagne 
lever and once it’s clamped to a bottle of bubbly, 
there’s no more effervescent pop or dented ceil- 
ings, from Bazaar De La Cuisine, $4.50. Below 
right: Champagne pliers, from La Cuisiniere,$12.50. 


Above: The barman’s corkscrew is a heavy-duty professional tool that fastens to a 
countertop or table and then stands ready to lend a helping hand when it's party 
time and you've a number of bottles to open, from The Professional Kitchen, $62.95. 283 


284 


GRAPEVINE 


(© THE PRESS ASSOCIATION LTD, 


Bunny, Bunny, Where 
Have You Been? 

I’ve Been to Epsom 

to Visit the Queen! 


On the left, we have QUEEN ELIZABETH, 
dressed in a yellow suit and matching 


day; she’s there to watch one of her 
thoroughbreds run in England’s biggest 
race. On the right, in a scarlet Bunny cos- 
lume with white ears and tail, we have 
LOUISE PALMER, a 24-year-old thor- 
oughbred, there to promote Playboy’s 
British bookmaking operations. “Û had this 
huge white daisy in my hand,” said Lı 
explaining how she crossed paths wi 
“We were allowed to stay on the same side 
of the railing as the queen, andso I handed 
the daisy to her. She looked a bit surprised, 
but she smiled and said, ‘Thank you.’ She 
was lovely.” Twenty-four hours later, 
Louise was something of a national celeb- 
rity. One interviewer titled his piece, “The 
Face in Front of Those Legs.” But, as you 
can see from our off-track photo, Louise is 
lovely all over. Oh, yes: Liz’s horse 
finished out of the money. Bad show. 


BRIAN HENNESSEY 


LYNN GOLDSMITH. 


On the Road Again 


BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN was locked in the studio for 11 months putting down tracks for the 
long-awaited Darkness on the Edge of Town. Now he’s out on parole, with the semilegendary Е 
Street band, touring far and wide and forever. There's no stopping or standing on Easy Street. 


RON GALELLA 


She's Only a Bird 
in a Gilda Cage 


What you see here is a high-level political- 
campaign strategy session between New Jersey 
senatorial candidate BILL BRADLEY and his 
consumer-policy advisor, ROSEANN ROSE- 
ANNADANNA. Miss Roseannadanna, nationally 
known for her consumer reports on NBC's 
Saturday Night Live, is considered to be one of 
the key aides to the young Democrat, nationally 
known as a former forward with the New York 
Knicks. If Bradley wins in November against his 
equally young and untested Republican oppo- 
nent, Jeffrey Bell, there are unconfirmed re- 
ports that he will nominate Miss Roseannadanna 
for the post of Secretary of the U.S. Depart- 
ment of Health, Education and Coneheads. 


Street Fighter 


No, this is not a rubble-strewn street scene from 
some old World War Two picture. This is New York 
restaurateur ELAINE KAUFMAN defending her 
Manhattan saloon, Elaine's, from a determined as- 
sault by prying paparazzo RON GALELLA. While the 
social butterflies are known to flit around El 
with nocturnal regularity, on this particular night the 
place was dizzy with celebrity monarchs: Woody 
Allen, Cheryl Tiegs, Richard Dreyfuss. This being 
Galella’s photographic métier, he staked out the 
street. That did not set well with Elaine, who likes to 
protect her clients. You don’t have to bea lip reader 
to understand the gist of Elaine’s feelings on the 
matter. Who took the photo? Galella, of course. 


285 


286 


Die Sexte Dimension or 
Is This Any Way to Run 
a Playboy Pad? 


We have to keep a close eye on the foreign 
editions of ptavsoy. Things are always gelting 
lost in translation. When we first saw these 
pictures in the August issue of the German 
PLAv&OY, we wondered if our friends across the 
sea had somehow gotten the notion of the 
Playboy Pad mixed up with A Layman's Guide 
to Surrealism. We hired an interpreter, who 
discovered that the feature was called Die 
Sexte Dimension. Photographer Gerhard 
Vormwald had created these crazy rooms for 
his own amusement. The caption to one of the 
pictures made everything clear: "The fallen 
angel dials the secret number. ‘Hello, | can 
procure for you an apocalypse wrapped in 
silver or in blue. Are you interested?’ The per- 
son on the other side breathes deep and heavy. 
Connections have been established. ‘When can 
we see each other?’ ‘Tonight or never,’ is the 
answer. ‘Where are you?’ ‘Behind the brightest 
star in seventh heaven.’ The wire grows hot and 
there is a white noise in the receiver. ‘I'll be 
there,’ she screams and ascends. The fiery rod 
seems to know the way. She discounts her sis- 
ter's dire warning." Or another: “To record 
those wet dreams, photographer Gerhard 
Vormwald built a shower cabin in his Munich 
studio, suspended the girl from the handles and 
poured the water over her with a sprinkler can. 
All he did then was to turn the photo for 90 
degrees. Simple, wasn't it?" As we said. We 
have to keep an eye on our foreign editions. 


PLAYBOY'S ROVING EYE 


288 


WHY DON'T WE 
GET DRUNK AND SCREW? 


We finally have an answer to Jimmy 
Bufíett's musical question. Psychologists 
Gary Farkas and Ray Rosen at the Uni- 
versity of Hawaii have confirmed that 
too much booze can retard sexual per- 
formance. The researchers gave 16 col- 
lege men various drinks equivalent to 
zero, one, two or Ihree cocktails mixed 
with one ounce each oí 100-proof 
liquor. Then the men viewed porno 
movies while the researchers moni- 
tored their heartbeats with polygraphs 
and their erections with a form of peter 
meter. The turned-on collegians expe- 
rienced а nine-millimeter increase in 
the diameter of their penises with no 
alcohol, an average of ten millimeters’ 
increase with one drink. Let's hear it 
for one for the road. However, before 
you gel your spirits up, read this: With 
three drinks, the erections shrank to an 
average of just under seven and a half 
millimeters, 


ROLL YOUR OWN 


While American condoms may be 
top quality, their film and foil packets 
have befuddled bedroom eyes for 
years. It's sometimes a struggle to main- 
tain any Glan, not to mention an erec- 
tion, without ripping the condom 


itself. But now the Swedes (perhaps 
because of their long, dark winter) have 
introduced “consumer friendly" pack- 
aging. The condoms are packed in 
easy-to-open, transparent film without 
the little paper oval commonly found 
on American condoms. By opening it 
with the transparent side away from 
himself, the user is assured the condom 
will be in the right position to roll on. 
In the same mode, Swedish manufac- 
turers have introduced such friendly 
graphic motifs as flowers and bees and 
the pictured tobacco pouch. So when 
you see a Swedish gentleman gingerly 
tapping that tobacco pouch against his 


SEX NEWS 


pipe while eying the Nordic blonde 
nearby, better check that tobacco 
pouch again 


BROWN SUGAR 


We've always been partial to choc- 
olate bunnies, but we'll have to admit 
that the Edible Sculpture Contest at The 


Art Institute of Chicago educated our 
palate. Sculptor chefs concocted every- 
thing from hamburger people to choc- 
olate apples and breasts. Our favorite, 
pictured here amid tropical fruit à la 
Gauguin, is a 100-pound milk-choco- 
late nude mold. The artist, Brian Gar- 
rick, fashioned a cast from the real 
Vicki Haines of PLavsov's Art Depart- 
ment. If you think you could develop 
an appetite for this sort of thing, 
sorry—the entire exhibit was consumed 
after the show by participants and visi 
tors. Haines reports that her 75-cents- 
per-pound likeness was eaten in five 
minutes, which raised certain questions 
we thought we'd better not ask, 


LESS IS MORE 


America's plastic surgeons have 
bad news for breast men. The hot 
subject at this year's mecting of the 
American Society for Aesthetic Plastic 
Surgery was the growing number of re- 
quests for breast reduction. Surgeons 
ascribe the new taste for tiny tits to a 
number oí things, including the no-bra 
look, skinny fashion models and the 
women's movement. One surgeon al- 
lowed that perhaps small breasts are 
beginning to turn men on. 


WHIFF-HOLDING EVIDENCE 


The question of whether or not a 
rape victim should resist has never 
been resolved. Now there's a form of 
passive resistance that makes sense, er, 
а scent. Canadian Paul LeBlond has 
invented an antirape device consisting 


of à small capsule filled with synthetic 
skunk odor. The capsule, called Rapel, 
is broken easily in one hand by the 
user, who will be surrounded imme- 
diately by a strong skunk odor, it's 
hoped deterring the assailant, who 
won't be too hard to sniff out later. 


Е 
iS 


NEW HOPE FOR HERPES 


The good word is: bioflavonoids. A 
team of Navy dentists at the National 
Naval Center in Bethesda, Maryland, 
have revealed that patients suffering 
from Herpes Simplex I, the oral type, 
respond rapidly to treatments with 
а water-soluble bioflavonoid-ascorbic- 
acid complex. Lesions on the lips healed 
completely within four days when 
treated with the supplement, as op- 
posed to the ten days it took a control 
group to heal. The study did not test 
the potion on Herpes Simplex Il, the 


8 


TART 


Speaking of V.D., here's something for 
the person who has everything. A Case 
of Clap from Et Tu Enterprises. You can 
get it anywhere, And, as we know so 
well, it’s the gift that keeps on giving. 


genital variation, but some experts 
think there may be hope in that area. 
Beutlich, Inc, the producer of a bio- 
flavonoid-ascorbic-acid tablet called 
Peridin-C (which is available over the 
counter), has been approached to test 
iton the genital virus, but no work 

has been done to date. B 


TEST 


LANCIA 
VALUE. 


Lancia has value unique among 
automobiles in its class. Value 
inherent in every aspect of this 
beautiful car — in structure, in 
appointments, in performance. 
A 70-year history of engineering 
innovation plus classic Italian 
design has created an automo- 
bile that combines superior 


ое Sedan. Lani 


handling and roadability with 
more than a taste of luxury. A 
World Rally Champion in 1972, 
1974, 1975 and 1976, Lancia 
responds to the touch of experi- 
enced drivers. Rack and pinion 
steering, front wheel drive, fully 
independent suspen- 
sion and 4-wheel disc 


a of Amer 


brakes combine to give preci- 
sion control for a great driving 
experience. And you can enjoy 
the comfort typical of far more 
expensive automobiles. You'll 
find Lancia is the intelligent alter- 
native to overpriced and over- 
rated luxury imports. Test Lancia 
value. Then test drive Lancia. 


The intelligent alternative 
to overpriced luxury imports 


asion of F.M.N A, 155 Chestnut Ridge Road, Montvale 


PLAYBOY 


Classic English Leather®. The fresh, 
clean, masculine scent a woman 
loves her man to wear... or nothing at 
all. Wind. A clear, crisp call to 
adventure...refreshing as the wind 
from the sea. Timberline’ isk and 


woodsy, exhilarating as the great 
outdoors. In After Shave, Cologne, 
Gift Sets, and men’s grooming gear. 
Atfine toiletry counters. 


English Leather. 


Northvale, New Jersey 07647 © 1978 
Available in Canada 


NEXT MONTH: 


CURRENT BUNNIES 


MOVIE SEX PERFECT MATCH 


“THE HOFFA WARS"—WHO KILLED JIMMY HOFFA AND WHY: 
A MAJOR INVESTIGATION! INTO THE TEAMSTER LEADER'S IN- 
VOLVEMENT WITH ASSASSINATION PLOTS, ORGANIZED CRIME 
AND RICHARD NIXON—BY DAN Е. MOLDEA 


“FALLING ANGEL"—THE STUNNING CONCLUSION OF OUR NEW 
DETECTIVE NOVEL ABOUT THE SEARCH FOR A MISSING VOCAL- 
IST—BY WILLIAM HJORTSBERG 


GERALDO RIVERA DISCUSSES THE RUMORS THAT HAVE CIRCU- 
LATED ABOUT HIM, THE NATURE OF TV NEWS AND HIS BAR 
MITZVAH IN A FRANK, OUTSPOKEN PLAYBOY INTERVIEW 


“SEX IN CINEMA—1978"—HERE IT COMES AGAIN, THE YEAR'S 
ROUNDUP OF STEAMY FILM FARE, PLUS AN ANALYSIS OF HOLLY- 
WOOD'S CURRENT MOOD—BY ARTHUR KNIGHT 


“HIGH ON THE HILL"—AN EXCLUSIVE POLL OF MEMBERS OF 
CONGRESS ON THEIR USE OF "CONTROLLED SUBSTANCES"—BY 
LOIS ROMANO AND KEN CUMMINS 


“PERFECT MATCH"—REJECTED BY HER LOVER, A YOUNG 
WOMAN GETS TOGETHER WITH AN ARSONIST AND BEGINS A 
FLAMING AFFAIR-BY BARBARA ROCHELLE 


“THE GREAT SIXTIES QUIZ"—YES, THOSE WERE THE DAYS— 
FREE LOVE, FREE SEX, FREE TEAR GAS.... BUT HOW MUCH DO 
YOU REALLY REMEMBER?—BY DAN CARLINSKY 


“PLAYBOY'S COLLEGE BASKETBALL PREVIEW’’—OUR 
MAN'S WELL-EDUCATED GUESSES ABOUT THE FORTHCOMING 
COLLEGIATE HOOP SEASON (PLUS A SNEAK PEEK AT THE PROS- 
PECTS OF THE PRO TEAMS)—BY ANSON MOUNT 


“LEARNING TO BE POOR"—COLLEGE MAY TEACH YOU TO 
THINK YOU'RE SMART, BUT IT SURE DOESN'T TEACH YOU HOW 
TO GET RICH—BY BEN STEIN 


“BUNNIES OF '78"—A PHOTOGRAPHIC TRIBUTE TO AN INTER- 
NATIONAL ARRAY OF HUTCH LOVELIES 


JUSTERINI & BROOKS Founded 1749 


In aworld where fame is fleeting, 
there’ a reason its been in the багын 


86 Proof Blended Scotch Whisky © 1978 Paddington Corp., М.Ү. 


Carlton 


is lowest. 


See how Carlton stacks 
down in tar. Look at thc latest 
U.S. Government figures for: 


tar nicotine 
А _ motio ma icd 

Winston Lights 12 09 

Vantage х) ЇЙ 07 

Salem Lights __ 17 08 

Kent Golden Lights 8 | o6 

Merit a в 06 

True 5 3 04 

Carlton Soft Pack 1 ол n 
Carlton Menthol less than 1 0.1 

Carlton Box less than *1 *0.1 


“Av per cigarette by FTC method 


Of all brands, lowest... Carlton Box: 1 mg tar, 
0.1 mg. nicotine av. per cigarette by FTC method 


Carlton. 


Filter E Menthol 


5 mg. 
tar. 


A Soft Pack and Menthol: 1mg. "tar", 0.1 mg. nicotine 
Warning: The Surgeon General Has Determined | 3v. per cigarette, FTC Report Aug. 77. Box: 1 mg. "tar" 0.1 mg. nicotine; 


That Cigarette Smoking Is Dangerous to Your Health. 100 mm. Soft Pack and Menthol: 5 mg. "tar", 0.5 mg. nicotine 
av. per cigarette by FTC method.