Full text of "PLAYBOY"
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PLAYBILL
WHILE MUCH entertainment news is fluff, we strive to bring you
the person inside the celebrity. Take Ме! Gibson. Sure, you've
seen him wisecrack in Lethal Weapon or glibly chat through TV
appearances. But you have never seen him as frank or as
brash as he is with Contributing Editor Lawrence Grobel in this
month’s Interview. Call 1995 Mad Max’ year of talking dan-
gerously. From bloody bar brawls to the battle-ax gore of his
new film, Braveheart, Gibson candidly describes his fights with
a former business partner (he calls her the C-word), an ob-
noxious biographer (“I'd tear his fucking face right off”) and
gay rights activists (Gibson's a staunch Catholic).
Ah, controversy. It fueled NYPD Blue's rookie season—but
credit Dennis Franz with keeping the show in doughnuts. Dur-
ing the David Caruso standoff, Franz let his portrayal of tor-
mented detective Andy Sipowic do the talking and was re-
warded with a Golden Globe. Writer Steve Oney got to know
Franz at the same time, and the resulting Playboy Profile is
powerful—particularly when Franz shares his memories of
Vietnam. Speaking of golden globes, Carol Shaye was recently
kicked off the New York City police force for doing the same
thing as Franz: baring her buns of blue steel in public (in her
case, the August 1994 рглувоу). This month, catch up with
Shaya in an arresting two-page feature
Law and order, round two: If there’s a rival to movies in
Los Angeles, it has to be courtroom drama. Four years ago, we
sent Robert Rand deep behind the defenses of Erik and Lyle
Menendez for an article (The Killing of Jose Menendez, March
1991) on what tumed out to be the second most celebrated
trial in America. Now, as the boys go back to court, Rand
brings us Menendez Confidential (illustrated by Stasys Eidrigevi-
cius) with fresh info on what Erik told O.]. in jail, and why Erik
thinks his former lawyer, Robert Shapiro, screwed up.
Kurt Loder is the most influential music critic on MTV next
to Beavis and Butt-head, which pretty much makes him more
important than the fifth Beatle. So he was ready when Con-
tributing Editor Worren Kalbocker showed up on his doorstep
for 20 Questions. Loder unloaded a bunch of stuff he can't say
on his show: what it’s like hanging out in the men’s room of
Radio City, his wish to see the photos of Michael Jackson's pe-
nis, and the feminist strains of Abba. On a different wave-
length, Contributing Editor Kevin Cook put his ear to the
ground, and it turned red from the latest wend: sex-talk ra-
dio. See his Media column, “Eargasms.” Also tuned in to a new
word order are graphic novelists who have dumped Super-
man for supermensch. In Postmodern Comics—a look at the of-
ten neglected art of comics for adults—John Tomkiw examines
the mavericks behind the new literacy.
Atlast, some real superheroes. Craig Vetter ascends an ocean-
side Olympus in Volleyball Goddesses. It’s a look at the women's
pro beach circuit. To use their language (see Beach Blanket Lin-
£0), you'll wince at the facials and sigh when the women put a
stamp on it. Then we downsize. With a nod to Louisa May Al-
cott, our Little Women pictorial focuses on babes who bring us
to our knees. Finding the right woman puts the hero of Road
Test, fiction by Lenny Kleinfeld, in a bind when he learns she has
a secret that will drive him around the bend. Vivienne Flesher
did the artwork.
It’s getting hot, so it's no wonder we have water on the
brain. We discovered Playmate Heidi Mark on the set of our
Miami Heat pictorial (September 1993). Thanks to photos by
Stephen Wayda, you'll see she’s doing swimmingly on the West
Coast. Then cool off with our Water Toys feature, illustrated by
Martin Hoffman. Our summer celeb fest concludes with ex—cal-
endar girl Sandra Taylor, who has a memorable scene on a train
in Steven Seagal's Under Siege 2: Dark Territory. Taylor is our
starlet at the end of the tunnel.
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PLAYBOY.
vol. 42, no. 7—july 1995 CONTENTS FOR THE MEN’S ENTERTAINMENT MAGAZINE
PLAYBILL. ee a а U
DEAR PLAYBOY ................ 13
PLAYBOY AFTER HOURS . сүл T ES 17
MOVIES BRUCE WILLIAMSON 20
VIDEO bees + B 23
STYLE 24
WIRED ОЙУ засо & ‚ £9
MEDIA...... . KEVIN COOK зо
MUSIC.,.... eese 32 Toylor Made
BOOKS. DIGBY DIEHL 36
MEN... * ASABABER 37
THE PLAYBOY ADVISOR. . . 39
THE PLAYBOY FORUM — 41
PLAYBOY INTERVIEW: MEL GIBSON—candid conversation. 5 ee АЙС]
MENENDEZ CONFIDENTIAL—true crime....................... ROBERT RAND 58
TAYLOR MADE—pictorial ыы (62)
HAWAIIAN CHIC—iashion. „HOLLIS WAYNE 70
PLAYBOY GALLERY: KAREN FOSTER Е ETS,
THE NEW POSTMODERN COMIC—orticle .. JOHN TOMKIW 77
CAROL SHAYA: BUSTED—pictoriol. |... ss er 82
ROAD TEST—fiction =... eee cere ee eee es eee eo > LENNY KLEINFELD 84
THE HEIDI CHRONICLES—ployboy's playmate of the month ................ 88
PARTY JOKES—humor 98
THE LINEN LOOK—foshion. .... 100
103
107
VOLLEYBALL GODDESSES—arlicle .................... 110
FULL MOON RISING—ployboy profile 112
LITTLE WOMEN—pictorial . 116
CARRY ON!—trovel............ + 126
20 QUESTIONS: KURT LODER .................. 128
WHERE & HOW TO BUY........ 159
PLAYBOY ON THE SCENE __ 161
COVER STORY
With her eye-catching role in Steven Seagal’s Under Siege 2, model-
turned-actress Sandra Taylor is оп her way. This month she celebrates In-
dependence Day in her own special way. Our cover wos produced by West
Coast Photo Editor Marilyn Grabowski, styled by Jennifer Tutor and photo-
graphed by Stephen Wayda. Thanks to Alexis Vogel for styling Sandro's
hair and makeup. Fireworks by John Cranham and, of course, our Rabbit.
GENERAL OFFICES: PLAYBOY. ево NORTH LAKE SHORE DRIVE. CHICAGO, ILLINOIS 6061 |. PLAYBOY ASSUMES NO RESPONSIBILITY TO RETURN UNSOLICITED EDITORIAL OR GRAPHIC он OTHER MA-
PAGES 36:37 IN ALL DOMESTIC SUPSCHIPTION COPIES OPTEK INSERT BETWEEN PAGES 130-131 IN SELECTEO OOMESTIC Si
TAS HUSTHAOAS BEPENBIENTE DE LA SECRETARIA CE GOBERNACIÓN, MÉXICO. RESERVA DE TÍTULO EN TRÁMITE
PRINTED IN U.S.A
PLAYBOY
10
© 1985 Playboy
Our own Romantics
by Playboy lingerie
{as shown here on
Playmate Shae Marks),
sensuous videos,
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romantic products for
couples, unique gifts. . .
end a few surprises.
Fora FREE catalog,
send your name end
address to: Playboy,
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Itasca, IL 60143-0809
PLAYBOY
ARTHUR KRETCHMER editorial director
JONATHAN BLACK managing editor
TOM STAEBLER art director
GARY COLE photography director
KEVIN BUCKLEY executive editor
JOHN REZEK assistant managing editor
EDITORIAL.
ARTICLES: PETER MOORE, STEPHEN RANDALL edi-
tors; FICTION: ALICE K. TURNER editor; FORUM:
JAMES R. PETERSEN Senior staff writer; CHIP ROWE
assistant editor; MODERN LIVING: DAVID
stevens editor; Bern Tomniw associate editor;
STAFF: BRUCE KLUGER, CHRISTOPHER NAPOLITANO,
BARBARA NELLIS associate editors; FASHION: HOL-
LIS WAYNE director; JENNIFER RYAN JONES assis-
tant editor; CARTOONS: MICHELLE URRY editor;
COPY: LEOPOLD FROEHLICH editor; ARLAN BUSH-
MAN assistant editor; ANNE SHERMAN сору associ-
ale; CAROLYN BROWNE senior researcher; LEE
BRAUER, REMA SMITH, SARI WILSON researchers;
CONTRIBUTING EDITORS: ASA BABER.
KEVIN COOK, GRETCHEN EDGREN, LAWRENCE GRO-
BEL, KEN GROSS (gulomolive), CYNTHIA HEIMEL,
WILLIAM J. HELMER, WARREN KALBACKER, D. KEITH
MANO, JOE MORGENSTERN, REG POTTERTON, DAVID
RENSIN, DAVID SHEFF, DAVID STANDISH. MORGAN
STRONG, BRUCE WILLIAMSON (movies)
ART
KERIG POPE managing director; BRUCE HANSEN,
CHET SUSKI, LEN WILLIS senior directors; KRISTIN
KORJENEK associate director; ANN SEIDL supervisor,
heyline/pasteup; PAUL CHAN, RICKIE THOMAS art
s
PHOTOGRAPHY
MARILYN GRABOWSKI west coast editor; JIM LARSON,
MICHAEL ANN SULLIVAN senior editors; PATTY
BEAUDET associate editor; STEPHANIE BARNETT,
BETH MULLINS assistant editors; DAVID CHAM,
RICHARD FEGLEY, ARNY FREYTAG, RICHARD IZUL,
DAVID MECEY, BYRON NEWNAN, POMPEO POSAR,
STEPHEN WayDa contributing photographers;
SHELLEE WELLS stylist; TIM HAWKINS manager, pho-
to archive
RICHARD KINSLER publisher
PRODUCTION
MARIA MANDIS director; RITA JOHNSON manager;
KATHERINE CAMPION, JODY JURGETO, RICHARD
QUARTAROLI. TOM SIMONER associate managers
CIRCULATION
LARRY A. DJERF newsstand sales director; PHYLLIS
ROTUNNO subscription circulation director; CINDY
RAKOWITZ communications director
ADVERTISING
ERNIE RENZULLI advertising direclor; JUDY BER-
‚kowitz national projects director; KIM L PINTO
sales director, eastern region; IRV KORNBLAU maT-
keting director; LISA NATALE research director
READER SERVICE
LINDA STROM, MIKE OSTROWSKI correspondents
ADMINISTRATIVE
EILEEN KENT new media director; MARCIA TER
RONES rights & permissions administrator
PLAYBOY ENTERPRISES, INC.
CHRISTIE HEFNER chairman, chief executive officer
Bates: Jane 2 5, 8,15, 2120/29
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‚Playdates: June 10,12,15,21,24,
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Playdates: June 6 19, 22, 28,30;
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FOR THE РЕМ WHD KNow THE DIFFERENCE
12
DEAR PLAYBOY
680 NORTH LAKE SHORE DRIVE
CHICAGO, ILLINOIS 50611.
FAX 312-549-9534
E-MAIL DEARPE@PLAYBOY.COM
PLEASE INCLUDE YOUR DAYTIME PHONE NUMBER.
HISTORY OF JAZZ & ROCK
Hope I Die Before I Get Old (April) by
David Standish helped a lot of the
Nineties generation tune in to the roots
of today's music.
Rocky Hanrahan
Wilmington, Massachusetts
As a fan of Sixties music and of the
Rolling Stones, I must raise one minor
point about a guitar pictured in Stan-
dish's article. It may have belonged to
Keith Richards, but I can assure you he
never played it during the Sixties. The
Fender Telecaster Deluxe wasn't pro-
duced until 1972. A more appropriate
choice would have been the Les Paul
custom, which, as I recall, Richards
played and smashed on the 1969 tour.
Jeffrey Hunt
South Berwick, Maine
BARBARA KEESLING
PLAYBOY has had some marvelous mo-
ments, but none finer than The Doclor Is
In (April), From her writing, 1 know that
Barbara Kecslingis intelligent, articulate
and compassionate. 1 am delighted to
discover that she is an exquisite beauty
as well.
David Chapman
Loveland, Colorado
The photos of Barbara Keesling are
wonderful. Hawaiian Tropic girls Angel
Boris and Shana Hiatt may have stolen
my heart, but the good doctor is wel-
come to the rest.
B.V. Evans
Alpharetta, Georgia
DYING YOUNG
I was gratified by Betty Friedan's com-
ments on the pathetically short male life
span in Why Men Die Young (April). She
had dismissed this issue back in the Sev-
enties. I am disappointed that she still
subscribes to feminist nonlogic. If the fe-
male population sacrificed more than 10
million lives and the medical profession
didn’t bother to find out why, would
feminists conclude that society doesn't
take men seriously?
Fredric Hayward
Men's Rights Inc.
Sacramento, California
Women have longer life spans because
they have the freedom to make changes.
Women can go to college to expand their
minds, while men must go to set a career
path in concrete. Women may join the
military by choice; with men, it is either a
call to duty or required by law. Even
pregnancy is a woman's choice. Maybe
we should spend more on men's health
care until life span equity is achieved.
Eugene Phillip
Great Falls, Virginia
Friedan's piece reminds me of a true
story about the wife of a former employ-
ee. This man took another job that re-
quired him to travel. While out of town,
he was murdered. When I went to pay
my respects, his wife told me that when
she had her husband's body returned to
her she began to strike his corpse in
anger. Why? Because he had gotten him-
self killed and left her with three chil-
dren. This didn't seem any more abnor-
mal to me than Friedan blaming men for
their own early deaths. But I do object to
you subjecting me to this ignorance. Lit-
tle boys want to be heroes. Little girls
want to be loved. Heroes die young.
Steven Maberry
Santa Fe, New Mexico
Friedan's article on why women live
longer is insulting to men. The issue is a
neglect of men's health, not women's
Men must ask why federal dollars aren't
spent to determine why women live
longer than men. Friedan’s anecdotal ev-
idence may have some merit, but as sci-
ence it's useless.
Steven Holzner
National Center for Men
Ithaca, New York
MYSTERIOUS
B E A u T Y
Kinuko Craft has done hundreds of illus-
trations for Playboy, often rendering mod-
ern subjects in the styles of bygone mas-
ters. Now you can own one of her most
romantic and sensual images as a signed
and numbered lithograph. Mysterious
Beauty, which appeared in the June
1982 issue of Playboy, cleverly juxtapos-
es an ancient Japanese couple with con-
temporary lovers who echo them in pose.
THE ORIGINAL PRINT
MEASURES 37%” X 30.”
LIMITED TO 300 IMPRESSIONS,
EACH IS SIGNED BY THE ARTIST.
THE PRICE 15 5100.
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ASK FOR DEPT. 40051 AND
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PLAYBOY
PERCHANCE TO DREAM
I met April Playmate Danelle Folta at
the Health and Fitness Expo before the
Los Angeles Marathon. She was beauti-
ful, outgoing and sincere, and she had a
positive attitude about life.
Dan Hernandez
Los Angeles, California
I have always loved redheads, but
Danelle is absolutely radiant. Her red
hair reflects her passion for life.
H. Alan Myrick
Richmond, Virginia
REPORTER'S NOTEBOOK
While I always enjoy reading Robert
Scheer's controversial opinions, “Cracked
Obsession” (April) really pissed me off.
It’s not right to penalize crack possessors
five times more harshly than powder
possessors, but I hardly think this is an
attempt to oppress the black community.
It surely goes deeper than the color of
someone's skin. The real issues here are
politics, money and drugs.
Leland Wheaton
Dayton, Ohio
To say that the tough laws on crack are
really calculated efforts aimed at harass-
ing blacks is ridiculous and very cynical.
When crack came on the scene a rela-
tively short time ago its usage was grow-
ing at an alarming rate. The tough laws
were passed in an effort to discourage its
use. 1 he laws area good thing for every-
body, especially for those who live in the
projects. When writers manipulate data
and dream up conspiracies, they do
more to hurt race relations than they do
to help them.
Malcolm Washington
Des Moines, Iowa
Robert Scheer missed one important
point. Instead of reducing the penalty
for crack use, why not stiffen the penalty
for powdered cocaine use until the two
are comparable?
Greg O'Keefe
Newport News, Virginia
VIRTUAL ERROR
Just thought Га let you know that
your illustration for the virtual guitar
CD-ROM game (Wired, April) is a bass.
Even though a bass is а guitar, a guitar is
not necessarily a bass. The game uses a
guitar (six strings), the illustration shows
a bass (four strings).
Mark Biery
Chesapeake, Virginia
Thanks for bringing this to our readers’ at-
tention. We were having so much fun jam-
ming with Joe Perry, we failed to notice that
we broke tio strings.
BEAUTIFUL BRONZE BOMESHELLS
When 1 received my April issue and
saw the cover, 1 just about went into car-
14 diac arrest. Please give us a pictorial of
Shana Hiatt (Girls of Hawatian Tropic) as
soon as possible.
РС. Thomas
PGThomas@aol.com
Van Nuys, California
Until now, 1 never understood why
letter writers told you that you had
achieved perfection in a pictorial or on a
cover. Your April cover is not only as-
tounding, it's perfect
Jeremy Ahern
Laramie, Wyoming
Sung Hi Lee is the most incredible
woman to appear in PLAYBOY in a long
time. Could you devote an entire issue
to her?
Rob Dennis
Ann Arbor, Michigan
You have featured some wonderful
covers over the years—Susan Kiger (No-
vember 1977), Liz Wickersham (April
1981), Teri Peterson (November 1981)
and Jennifer Lavoie (October 1994).
Now it's no contest. Shana Hiatt’s cover
surpasses them all.
Andy Boyd
Wheaton, Illinois
We, your loyal readers at UC-Berke-
ley, would like to see more of Sung Hi
Lee. Two pictures are not enough.
Riva Han
Berkeley, California
Generally, I'm more interested in the
articles than the pictures. But Shana Hi-
ац’ cover has to be the best ever.
Hilton Wiggins
Dallas, Texas
WOMEN
1 just read Cynthia Heimel's “Nice
Girls Don't Read Romances” (Women,
April) and 1 wonder what took her so
long to discover these books. When most
of the men I know see a “bodice ripper”
on their lover's nightstand, they know
that it will usually lead to interesting
lovemaking. I'd be happy to recommend
some titles.
Deborah Cook
Fountain Valley, California
Nice girls read romances; so do girls
who are naughty, old, young, fat, skinny,
attractive, plain, fashionable or unfash-
ionable. According to Harlequin Books,
there are more than 50 million female
romance readers in North America
alone. The sex scenes take place in the
context of monogamous. relationships
that work on equal terms. That's the fan-
tasy for women.
Susan Wiggs
Houston, Texas
I find Cynthia Heimel intelligent and
witty. However, I must take exception to
her April column. I am a reader and
writer of romance novels. I suggest a
book called Dangerous Men. and Adventur-
ous Women by Jayne Ann Krentz, which
explains why women enjoy these books.
By the way, 46 percent of all paperbacks
sold are romance novels.
Tonya Lawson
Ontario, California
COURT MAGIC
I enjoy reading your interviews and
articles, but I take issue with Joe Mor-
genstern's profile of Johnnie Cochran in
the April issue. He portrays Cochran as a
hero looking out for the underdog, but
what we really have here is an obnoxious
attorney who is going to cost Los Ange-
les taxpayers millions of dollars, espe-
cially if there needs to be a second trial.
Michael Robinson
Rockville, Maryland
FICTION
Afier reading Richard Chiappone's
Dealer’s Choice (April), I can only say:
Thank the Lord it is only fiction. Poker
is the ultimate contemporary form of
manly combat. It’s what testosterone is
all about.
Richard Sterk
Danbury, Connecticut
NYPD NUDE REVISITED
What's wrong with this world? I'm
talking, of course, about Carol Shaya
(New York's Finest, August) getting
canned. What did she do that was
wrong? She got punished, and the scum
she tried to lock up are free to walk the
streets. I hope that we'll see her in
PLAYEOY again.
Adam Waldera
Whitewater, Wisconsin
Turn to page 82 for a new Carol Shaya pic-
torial and enjoy.
16 mg таг 11 mg nicotine av. per cigarette by FIC method.
SURGEON GENERAL'S WARNING: Smoking
By Pregnant Women May Result in Fetal
Injury, Premature Birth, And Low Birth Weight.
© Philip Morris Inc. 1995
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PLAYBOY AFTER HOURS
THE BREEDER HANDBOOK
To paraphrase Henry Beard and
Christopher Cerf, authors of The Official
Sexually Correct Dictionary and Dating
Guide, the language of romance is not
dead; st heavily footnoted. With
572 notations, the Dating Guide is an ex-
haustively researched glossary of terms
actually coined by such hyperfeminists
as Andrea Dworkin and Sheila Jeffreys.
Some of the more startling interpreta-
tions include
Coitus: punishment
Dating: compulsory heterosexuality
Desire: eroticized power difference
Flowers: instruments of ritual violation
Kissing: osculatory rape
Man: potential rapist
Marriage: domestic incarceration
Mistletoe: an uninvited-endearment
sanctifier
Penis: dildo substitute
Prostitute: sex care provider
WILD OATS
Looks like a young mover and shaker
at Quaker Oats knows a thing or two
about acid trance. Packages of Instant
Quaker Oatmeal now sport bits of pop
trivia on such subjects as hip-hop, rave,
fanzines and grunge. One demanding
multiple-choice question asked kids:
“What's the difference between house
music and rave music?” Fortunately for
parents, the answer was listed on the
same packet: “House is generally 120
beats per minute, rave is 132 beats per
minute.”
HIGH-RISE HOTEL
The Mandarin Oriental hotel in San
Francisco sits atop a 48-story skyscraper.
With bathtubs-for-two equipped with
spigots for champagne and an inspiring
view of the tip of the Transamerica pyra-
mid, it was saluted in a recent issue of
the British magazine For Women as the
Horny Hotel of the Month.
BRINGING UP THE REAR
Recently, the Los Angeles Times praised
retired general Norman Schwarzkopf
for encouraging men to overcome their
reluctance to discuss prostate cancer. He
explained how his own prostate cancer
almost went undetected and reasoned
that “when you are a general, the doc-
tors don't tend to do a thorough digital
rectal exam.” No, they save those for pri-
vates and taxpayers.
WOMEN AND WOODIES
Ah, the strong, silent type: Self recent-
ly published an article on eco-psycholo
By. a new form of psychotherapy that is
designed for people riddled with worries
about the degradation of the environ-
ment. The cure? One eco-shrink recom-
mended "establishing a relationship with
a tree.”
U GOT 2B KIDDING
Four years ago, Pam O'Leary of Mich-
igan requested and got the vanity license
plate russe, which expressed her sup-
port of the French abortion pill. Howev-
er, a few months ago state officials wrote
her demanding that she surrender the
plates, claiming they were “obviously is-
sued in error.” The Secretary of State's
ILLUSTRATION BY GARY KELLEY
office routinely checks requests for vani-
ty plates that combine words, numbers
or letters in an offensive way. Curiously,
there is a Michigan license plate that
reads rroLiFE, which no one has com-
plained about yet. O'Leary plans to ap-
peal the state’s decision
MR. PAINT-BY-NUMBER
For starters, it stands for the hopes, as-
pirations and collective good wishes of
an entire civilization. The Internal Rev-
enue Service uses so many acronyms
that even accountants who daily toil
within its regulations find them confus-
ing. Recently, IRS chief Margaret Milner
Richardson recalled one tax specialist
who was listening to a discussion of the
IRS's Art Advisory Panel, a group that
values taxpayers’ artwork gifts. The spe-
cialist turned to Richardson and asked,
“What does ART stand for?”
MY OWN PRIVATE ALAMO
Texans are famous for their ability to
defend their turf, so it's not surprising
that a San Antonio company has taken
home security to a truly ornery level:
Bullet Resistant Systems can turn your
home into a fortress impervious to gun-
fire. The company installs bullet-resis-
tant, fiberglass-based paneling on walls
and doors and equally tough shutters
on windows. In a backhanded endorse-
ment, police officials have expressed dis-
may about the system because it helps
prevent gunfire from entering the house
no matter which side of the law the bul-
lets come from.
THE 13 TENNERS
In appealing her alimony award, Toni
Tenner argued that she didn’t commit
the adultery that led to the breakup of
her marriage. Rather, it was one of her
13 personalities who violated her wed-
ding vows. Kentucky, where this case is
taking place, allows marital conduct to
Бе considered in determining alimony.
Tenner sought $1100 a month during
divorce proceedings; the court gave her
$500. The appeals court sided with her,
RAW
DATA
FACT OF THE
MONTH
Pepperoni is the
number one pizza
topping. Each year,
Americans eat about
300 million pounds
of the greasy red
disks on pizza—
adorning enough
pies to cover 13,000
football fields.
QUOTE
“He stands there
groping himselfand
he is 46 years old
and he shouldn't be
doing that. It disgusts me—but he
tells me that the young kids like it.” —
MIA TYLER, IGYEAR-OLD DAUGHTER OF
AEROSMITH SINGER STEVEN TYLER, ON
WHY SHE DISAPPROVES OF HER FATHER'S
STAGE MOVES
DOWNLOAD LOWDOWN
Between October 1994 and Febru-
ary 1995, number of times America
Online subscribers downloaded im-
ages of Lois & Clark's Teri Hatcher:
12,555; number of downloads of Mad
About You's Helen Hunt: 3671; of
Madonna's latest album cover: 3211;
of Nightline host Ted Koppel: 369.
THE LONG AND SHORT OF IT
Percentage of 1000 male respon-
dents surveyed by Glamour who said
they would prefer to be 52” with a
seven-inch penis: 62; percentage who
said they would prefer to be 62" with
а three-inch penis: 36; percentage
who admitted to having measured
their penises: 55; percentage who re-
fused to answer: 20.
JAILBIRD JAM
During the past 15 years, average
number of inmates added each week
to the nation's prison population:
900; number of federal prisons in
1982: 43; number of federal prisons
in 1994: 77.
THE INCREDIBLE SHRINKING DOLE
The average monthly payment in
inflation-adjusted dollars to welfare
families in 1970: $676; in 1993: $373.
HUSKY APPETITES
The number of
pounds of caribou
meat packed for ex-
plorer Will Steger,
five team members
and three teams of
sled dogs for the
March 1995 start of
a four-month trek
across the Arctic:
500; number of
pounds of cheese:
450; pounds of but-
ter: 225; pounds of
noodles: 200; pints
of potato-leck soup
and clam chowder:
180; pounds of dog food: 10,000. Av-
erage calories team members will
burn each day: 5000. Anticipated av-
erage weight loss for each team mem-
ber: 9 pounds.
MORMON CONQUEST
Number of Mormons who were liv-
ing in Mexico, Central America and
South America їп 1980: 700,000.
Number in 1993: 2.7 million.
REMOTELY CONTROLLING
In a survey conducted by Philips
Consumer Electronics, percentage of
men who would rather give up sex
than their TV remote for one weck:
9. Percentage of women who would
make the same choice: 18.
CRIMINAL ART COSTS
Price paid in November for a 1978
Andy Warhol portrait of O.]. Simp-
son signed by the artist: $34,500.
Price range for series of portraits of
Tonya Harding by the artist Defor-
restt: $5000 to $33.000. Price paid for
painting of a clown by executed serial
killer John Wayne Gacy: $20,000.
READ BETWEEN THE COMMERCIALS
Percentage of Americans who are
functionally illiterate—i.e., unable to
fill out a job application, follow writ-
ten instructions or read a newspaper:
9З; percentage of talk show guests
deemed illiterate by a Penn State so-
ciologist who recently studied 1000
hours of Oprah. Donahue and Sally
Jessy Raphael: 90. —LAURA BILLINGS
ruling that her mental illness excused
her affair, A dissenting opinion by Judge
Anthony Wilhoit said of the ruling that
the new standard for fault was “more in
keeping with the psychobabble preva-
lent on talk shows than with sound ju-
risprudence.” Tenner's former husband
has filed an appeal.
THE 50-MINUTE COMMUTE
Now, busy—and conflicted—execu-
tives can commute and work on their
psychotherapeutic issues at the same
time. Drs. Ursula Strauss and Shelley
Lennox pick up suburban New York ра-
tients in a van. While they are chauf-
feured into Manhattan, shrinks listen to
their patients’ problems. Mobile Psycho-
logical Services has 50 patients, six ther-
apists and three drivers. A session of
rolling insights costs $175.
HIGH ROLLERS
A federal court in California has deter-
mined that more than 75 percent of all
currency circulating in Los Angeles car-
ries traces of cocaine or other illegal
drugs. The Ninth Circuit Court of Ap-
peals said that the prevalence of such
drug-tainted paper money is so great
that almost anyone in the city could at-
tract the attention of drug-sniffing dogs,
and it used the finding to dismiss a case
against a man accused of transporting
drug money. In contrast, narcotics spe-
cialists said that only 15 percent of the
bills in Bozeman, Montana have traces of
drugs on them.
12 STEPS TO DECAF
We didn’t have to read tea leaves to
figure out that the java express was
heading for an inevitable crash—and
where else but in the heart of coffee
country? That's right, the first chapter of
Caffeine Anonymous has thrown open
its doors in Portland, Oregon. Since last
spring, caffeine addicts have been admit-
ting their powerlessness against demon
joe. “When I drink coffee,” says one fe-
male javaholic, “it’s just like drinking
а cup of unhappiness.” That's quite a
different tune from the early days of
grunge and fresh roasts.
ARMEY MANEUVERS
Afier House Majority Leader Richard
Armey referred to gay congressman.
Barney Frank as Barney Fag, Roll Call
assembled a list of congressional names
that Armey shouldn't even attempt to ut-
ter aloud: Norm Dicks, Daniel Akaka,
Mike Crapo, Chris Cox, Jay Dickey, John
Boehner, Mel Hancock, Harry Rei
Dick Swett and Carlos Moorhead. Fi
that matter, anyone named Dick Armey
who hasa predilection for Freudian slips
should be careful about how he intro-
duces himself.
sound, he realized
"thing about this
at this hour that
ly quicksilver,
boite filled
dies could
? zestful
\utiful.
M
| ‘looking, in ag
middie
MOVIES
By BRUCE WILLIAMSON
NOTHING 15 what it seems to be in A Pure
Formality (Sony Classics), a French-lan-
guage drama written and directed by
Giuseppe Tornatore, who made that
marvelously Italian movie Cinema Par-
adiso. This austere, unexpectedly cere-
bral exercise co-stars Gérard Depardieu
and Roman Polanski going head-to-
head as a famous novelist and an im-
placable small-town police inspector.
There's been a mysterious death near
the home of the writer, who is thrashing
wildly through a rainstorm when he is
taken into custody. He then becomes
hostile, absentminded and evasive dur-
ing the cat-and-mouse interrogation that
continues all night. The surprise ending
has been done on-screen a number of
times, but Tornatore does it again with a
stylish intensity only slightly diminished
by the air of deja vu. ¥¥
An exuberant performance by Marisa
‘Tomei provides much of the piz
The Perez Family (Samuel Goldwyn). She
plays Dottie, a free-spirited Cuban immi-
grant who leaps off the boat from Ha-
уапа to make waves in America. Dottie
instantly latches on to a fellow traveler
named Perez (Alfred Molina), who, after
years as a prisoner of the Castro regime,
hopes to find his wife and daughter
somewhere in Miami. Anjelica Huston
stretches her talents playing the lost
wife, Carmela. Trini Alvarado as her
daughter and Chazz Palminteri as a Mi-
ami cop more than casually interested in
Carmela's case add to the animated sup-
porting cast. Directed by Indian-born
Mira Nair (with the estimable Mississippi
Masala to her credit) and adapted by
Robin Swicord from a novel by Christine
Bell, this amiable ensemble piece deals
only superficially with the influx of
Cuban refugees to Florida. But The Perez
Family feels closer in spirit to Latin love
songs than sociology, as a film with heart,
soul and tempo. ¥¥¥
“Trendy drag queens on parade—from
Mrs. Doubtfire to The Adventures of Priscil-
la—may have paved the way for Wigstock:
The Movie (Samuel Goldwyn). Call it a
concert movie, call it high or low camp,
it’s an annual New York event hailed by
some partisans as the Super Bowl of
drag. While thousands cheer, such cele-
brated characters as RuPaul, Lypsinka,
Alexis Arquette and Mistress Formika
take the outdoor stage wearing sequins,
heels and hairdos from hell. Their per-
formances, largely prerecorded, range
20 from supersmart to god-awful. Between
Marisa Tomei: Cuban boat babe.
Suspects on the spot,
immigrants and militants on the beach
and transvestites in full bloom.
showbiz parodies, one enthusiast shouts,
“It's in to be gay in the Nineties!” True
or not, Wigstock is an unabashedly liber-
ated sign of the times. WYı
The intriguingly titled Love and Human
Remains (Sony Classics) is the first Eng-
lish-language feature by Canadian direc-
tor Denys Arcand, whose two previous
films in French (Jesus of Montreal and The
Decline of the American Empire) won Oscar
nominations. Brilliant as ever, Arcand
retains all of his hip, witty timeliness and
adds an edgy sense of danger to Brad
Fraser’s shrewd adaptation of his own
hit play. Performed to perfection by a lit-
tle-known cast, Love and Human Remains
examines some horny, screwed-up sin-
gles at large in an urban jungle. Thomas
Gibson, a Daniel Day-Lewis look-alike,
plays David, a gay waiter and former TV
sitcom star who prefers cruising to
celebrity. His roommate Candy (Ruth
Marshall) can’t find the right man, so she
trades teasing sexual sweet talk with а
vulnerable lesbian (Joanne Vannicola).
Davi other friends include Benita
(Mia Kirshner), a professional domina-
trix, and handsome Bernie (Cameron
Bancroft), an apparently uptight busi-
nessman who turns out to be seething
with dark secrets. This social study un-
folds against the search for a serial killer
in a nameless big city where everything
seems to happen at night. Arcand's
bright young misfits try desperately to
act cool, pretending they're not afraid of
the dark. ¥¥¥
According to Panther (Gramercy), the
decade-long Black Panthers movement
begun in 1966 was doomed by a conspir-
acy between the FBI and organized
mobsters to flood the black community
with drugs. That's the interpretation ac-
cepted by director Mario Van Peebles in
a frankly fictionalized docudrama co-
produced by his father, Melvin Van Pee-
bles, who also wrote the lively scrcen-
play. Balancing the portrayal of such
noted activists as Bobby Seale (Courtney
B. Vance), Huey Newton (Marcus
Chong) and Eldridge Cleaver (Anthony
Griffith), Kadeem Hardison appears as
an invented character named Judge, re-
стане by the FBI to inform but still
a double agent loyal to the Panthers’
cause. While unreliable as history, the
movie nonetheless packs a wallop of one-
sided conviction. ¥¥¥
Mountains loom and chasms yawn in
3-D during director Jean-Jacques (Quest
for Fire) Annaud's Wings of Courage (Sony
Classics). This 40-minute movie plays
only in theaters equipped to show giant-
screen Sony Imax and is the first feature
to combine stars and a story with this
state-of-the-art system. Val Kilmer, Tom
Hulce and Graig Sheffer portray airline
pioneers, with Sheffer as pilot Henri
Guillaumet Aying solo across the Andes
in 1930 to establish an airmail route be-
tween Santiago and Buenos Aires. Eliza-
beth McGovern plays Guillaumet's
who panics when her husband's plane
goes down in a snowstorm. Annaud's
brief survival story is a test run—a peek
into the future of movies with sweeping.
special effects. Viewers must wear a
headset to get really goggle-eyed on
Imax. It is spectacular, indeed. But will it
last, or go the way of earlier cinematic
gimmickry that promised to make films
better but merely made them bigger?
We'll know more later. ¥¥/2
Three boys and а girl come of age sex-
ually and politically at a school in south-
western France circa 1962. That's the
story of director Andre Techine's Wild
Reeds (Strand Releasing). Winner of four
1994 Césars—for best picture, best di-
rector and best screenplay in addition to
actress Elodie Bouchez’ award as best
young hopeful—such a mild human
comedy would be a long shot as an also-
ran in our Oscar sweepstakes. The
French seem more tolerant of a slower
The First Official Cesyette Collector Plate
The Chevrolet Motor Division
officially authorizes its first-ever
collector plate celebrating America’s
favorite sports car—the 1963 Corvette Sting Ray.
'he 1963 Corvette Sting Ray. America’s dream machine. The
sports car that stunned the automotive world with its
revolutionary design and performance,
Now, Chevrolet Motor Division officially authorizes their first-
ever collector plate capturing the power and glory of this classic саг.
Created by Don Wieland, celebrated illustrator and winner of
numerous awards in the field of automotive art. In the tradition of
the most prized collectibles, this imported heirloom collector plate is
crafted of fine porcelain and lavished with breathtaking color. It is
hand-numbered and bordered in 24 karat gold and bears the artists
signature mark on its reverse side.
Priced at just $29.95, this Limited Edition will be closed forever
after just 45 firing days, Available exclusively from The Franklin
Mint, Franklin Center, PA 19091-0001.
The 1963
Corvette Sting Ray
Individually numbered
by hand with 24 karat gold.
Plate shown smaller than
actual size of 8" (20.32 cm) in diameter.
A Limited Edition Collector Plate.
Hand-Numbered and Bordered in 24 Karat Gold.
The Franklin Mine Please mail by July 31, 1995.
nklin Center, РА 19091-0001
Please enter my order for
he 1963 Corvette Sting by Don Wieland.
my plate is
І need SEND NO MONEY NOW, J will b
ent. Limit: one plate per colle
ready tob
CITYT _
TELEPHONE + ( — — — `
22
Lundgren: day of the Dolph.
OFF CAMERA
Tall (675°), blond Dolph Lundgren,
36, is a hunk with a head on his
broad shoulders. Over breakfast at
a hotel near his New York apart-
ment, Lundgren shrugs at his
screen image as a Scandinavian
lug with more brawn than brains.
In fact, he has a master’s degree in
chemical engineering and won a
Fulbright scholarship to continue
studying at MIT. But in 1982, the
movies beckoned. “My brother is
in offshore drilling. I meant to go
into petroleum engineering, regu-
lating the oil flow at refineries. But
I got involved with the singer
Grace Jones and it suddenly
dawned on me that being a chemi-
cal engineer for the rest of my life
might be too boring.” Through
Jones, who tormented James
Bond in A View to a Kill, Lundgren
debuted in that film as “just a
walk-on” and followed with his
breakthrough role as the Russian
boxer in Rocky IV.
Now happily married for more
than a year to Anette, a Swedish
Lundgren has a sec-
Stockholm and seri-
for his film future. “Um
ing to be an action hero
like Stallone, Van Damme or
Schwarzenegger.” He describes his
role in the new film Johnny
Mnemonic with Keanu Reeves аза |
stretch. “I don’t think of myself as
just kicking ass.” His next movies
include an athletic epic titled Pen-
tathlon, as well as The Shooter, a
thriller in which he plays “a U.S.
marshal who goes to Prague to ar-
rest a female terrorist.” Lundgren
was once a European karate cham-
pion, and he's considering taking
time out to be team leader of the
U.S. pentathlon contingent at the
1996 Olympic games in Atlanta.
He also works with an offoff-
Broadway theater group. “The ex-
citing thing about show business is
to go in new directions. I want to
do things no one expects of me.”
pace, and Wild Reeds is easygoing, sensi-
tive and emotionally fine-tuned.
Frangois (Gael Morel) is a boy on the
verge of admitting he’s gay after some
homosexual horsing around with Serge
(Stephane Rideau), an uncomplicated
country stud who simply likes sex. Serge
also likes François’ friend Maite
(Bouchez), but she has eyes for Henri
(Frederic Gorny), an older student-radi-
cal from Algeria who is stressed out by
the Algerian war. Techine's rueful slice-
of-life makes no major statement but de-
livers some plain truth. ¥¥¥
Writer-director Maria Maggenti said it
best in describing her own first feature:
“The content is what's subversive, not
the form.” That's a fine introduction to
The Incredibly True Adventure of Two Girls in
Love (Fine Line). This buoyant nose-
thumbing comedy concerns two attrac-
tive high school seniors whose lesbian re-
lationship disrupts the status quo at
school and at home. Laurel Hollomon as
Randy and Nicole Parker as Evie are the
beleaguered couple. Their story actually
has more to do with young love than
with lesbianism, and they react to objec-
tions similar to those any teenage couple
might encounter by shacking up in a
motel. Tivo Girls in Love shrugs off its po-
tential shock value by emphatically say-
ing yes to real romance, gay or straight,
on the way 10 а sweet, somewhat corny
climax that leaves all sexes in sync. ¥¥
The bad news is that Forget Paris (Co-
lumbia) dusts off every cliche you might
expect in a romantic comedy about two
lovebirds who meet and mate in the City
of Light. The good news is that Billy
Crystal directs and stars in the film,
which he also cleverly co-authored with
his City Slickers collaborators, Lowell
Ganz and Babaloo Mandel. Crystal's co-
star is Debra Winger, and while they
don't quite click, both are easy to like—
especially when they're spouting hilari-
ous dialogue about career conflicts, sex
and Phantom of the Opera. She's an airline
executive based in Paris; he's a profes-
sional basketball referee. They meet, go
to bed, break up, marry, argue, separate
and try to procreate in a series of flash-
backs. Each chapter in their stormy rela-
tionship is introduced by three couples
waiting at a restaurant to see if the tur-
bulent twosome will show up together.
Joe Mantegna, Cynthia Stevenson, Rich-
ard Masur, Julie Kavner, John Spencer
and Cathy Moriarty add sizzle as the gos-
sipy sextet, with Charles Barkley, Ka-
reem Abdul-Jabbar and Isiah Thomas
giving Crystal back talk on the court.
Saddled with a clumsy structure, Forget
Paris still generates good vibes because a
lot of itis laugh-out-loud funny. ¥¥¥
MOVIE SCORE CARD
capsule close-ups of current films
by bruce williamson
Amateur (Reviewed 5/95) Sexy ex-nun
meets amnesiac porn merchant. YY/
The Basketball Diaries (5/95) Hoop
hopeful sidelined by a drug habit. ¥¥
Braveheart (6/95) As a historic Scot pa-
triot, Mel Gibson stars, directs and
gets it just about right. WI)
Burnt by the Sun (6/95) A vibrant saga
about Soviet Russia—and an Oscar
winner as best foreign language
film. УУУУ
Crumb (6/95) Compelling documen-
tary about a fine, funky artist from a
dysfunctional family. УУУУ;
Farinelli (5/95) Hitting all the high
notes with the world’s most famous
castrato. Wy
Forget Paris (See review) Marriage on
the rocks, deftly Crystalized. YYY
The Incredibly True Adventure of Two Girls
in Love (See review) Again, lesbian
comedy leaves the closet Уу
Jefferson т Paris (6/95) Nolte as Tom
does a slow, stylish stint abroad. ¥¥¥
Kiss of Death (5/95) Lively remake with
Cage and Caruso. we
Love and Human Remains (See review)
Kinky young singles at large. УУУ,
Muriel’s Wedding (4/95) Hilarious high
jinks about an unpopular girl who
just wants to get married. yyy
My Family (6/95) Through the years
with Chicano immigrant Wh
Panther (See review) Militant black
cats as an endangered species. ¥¥¥
The Perez Family (See review) Cuban
boat people make hay in Miami. УУУ
Picture Bride (6/95) A man, a woman
and a love match in old Hawaii. УУУ
The Postman (6/95) Poet meets peasant
ina poignant Italian comedy. ¥¥¥/
Priest (5/95) Gay, tormented man of
God gets hot under the collar. ¥¥¥¥
A Pure Formality (Sec review) Two stars
collide in a cerebral О & A. YY
Red Firecracker, Green Firecracker (6/95)
Scenic Chinese view of an explosive
forbidden love. yyy
Search and Destroy (6/95) Dark deeds
involving would-be moviemakers. YY
Swimming With Sharks (5/95) Kevin
Spacey saves it as a Hollywood preda-
tor who smells blood. Wh
The Underneath (5/95) A born loser
finds he can't go home again. ¥¥¥
Wigstock: The Movie (See review) Camp-
town races, with drag queens on pa-
rade, and then some. Wh
Wild Reeds (See review) The young
and restless in Sixties France. ww
gs of Courage (Sec review) High,
le and handsome 3-D eyeful. ¥¥/:
¥¥ Worth a look
Y Forget it
YYYY Don't miss
YYY Good show
VIDEO
ШАШ
[— —— | "This always gets
people in trouble,”
says George Lucas
when asked to name
his favorite flicks.
“Once you say it, it
all becomes history.”
Still, the movie mogul
and special-effects
wizard buckled down and gave us a short
list of classics, all worthy of rewind on the
VCR: Citizen Kane, Seven Samurai, A Hard
Day's Night, Dr. Strangelove, Battleship
Potemkin and The Bridge on the River
Kwai. “They're all emotionally powerful
movies," Lucas explains. “| like comedies, too,
but when I think about the films | want to
see over and over again, they're not usual-
ly the funny ones. Except Dr. Strangelove.
Now, that’s funny.” SUSAN KARLIN
VIDEO IDIOTS
If there's anything to learn from Jim
Carrey, it's that men will be morons—
and audiences will flock to see them.
Ace Ventura: Pet Detective (1994): Already
dumb before he got dumber, Jim Carrey
squeezes big laughs out of the 007 genre,
porpoises and, memorably, his own butt.
Infantilism at its breeziest.
Pee-wee's Big Adventure (1985): Before he
had a hand in his own demise, Paul
Reubens chased his stolen bicycle
through this zany road movie, with Tim
Burton at the helm and Danny Elfman's
score as slaphappy as the larger-than-life
scenario. A keeper.
The Disorderly Orderly (1964): Lewis split
from Martin in 1956, but the break
didn’t de-dumb him. Set in a nursing
home, this entry is typical Jerrified fum-
bling, bumbling and stumbling—just the
way the French like it.
The Strong Man (1926): Baby-faced bun-
gler Harry Langdon fends off toughs
and temptresses under the big top in this
silent gem. Unlike most screen dopes,
Langdon is reactive rather than active—
but just as funny.
Being There (1979): Peter Sellers drew
raves as a dim gardener whose small talk
about weeds and TV is mistaken for po-
litical sagacity. Jerzy Kosinski's screen-
play is pretty smart. —DAVID LEFKOWITZ
MUSES OF MOUSSE
In Immorial Beloved (scc Mood Meter),
Gary Oldman's swept-back tresses and
arched eyebrow help him portray Bee-
thoven as a well-groomed lover. It's not
the first time—actors who play com-
posers usually hit the right notes when
their coifs are in the proper key, Check
out these other musical poufs:
DIRK BOGARDE: Too-hip-for-the-times
hairdo makes Bogarde's Franz Liszt look
more like a 19th century Hungarian
rockabilly star in Song Without End
(1960). Also note those mod sideburns as
he tries to lay a latte on Capucinc.
RICHARD BURTON: He is the very image
of Richard Wagner's scowling bust in
the five-hour Brit saga Wagner (1983).
Speaking of busts, Vanessa Redgrave (in
a Wonderbra?) doesn’t seem to mind
Dick's slatternly hair one bit.
HUGH GRANT: As mop-topped Frédéric
Chopin, Grant is given to silly stovepipe
hats to cover his lackluster locks in /m-
promptu (1991). At least he's better than
Julian Sands, whose Liszt sports Ойу
blond tresses parted in the middle.
TOM HULCE: Curly powdered wigs were
all the rage when Mozart reigned. In
Amadeus (1984), a goofy and giggling
Hulce makes the case as to why the wigs
went out with the harpsichord.
cary GRANT: His slick Wildroot pom-
padour looks about the same as it always
does in Night and Day (1946), a biopic of
Cole Porter. But, hey, he's Cary Grant.
ROGER DALTREY: The Who singer Nails his
heavy metal mane (and undulates to
beat the band) as a sex-addicted Liszt in
director Ken Russell's acid-trippy Liszto-
mania (1975). —BUZZ MCCLAIN
LASER FARE
Lumivision puts its customary special in-
terest in special interest discs on hold
VIDEO YUKS
OF THE MONTH
Old meets new—and
two burlesque masters
meet one sitcom whin-
er—in Abbott and
Costello Meet Jerry
Seinfeld (MCA/Univer-
sal), a 46-minute trib-
ute to comedy's leg-
endary duo. Seinfeld hosts the trip back.
through A&C's lives and careers, featuring
the duo's home movies, behind-the scenes
peeks and, natch, "Who's on First?"
this month by re-pressing the theatrical
feature A Taxing Woman. The winner of
nine Japanese Academy Awards, the
1987 farce tracks a female tax inspector's
obsession with—and efforts to bust—the
owner of a Tokyo “love hotel.” The
movie was directed by Juzo Itami and
stars Nobuko Miyamoto and Tsutomu
Yamazaki (Jampopo, The Funeral), whom
some consider Japan's Tracy and Hep-
burn. . . . Sensory Overload of the
Month: side six of Voyager's gorgeous
Criterion Collection edition of The Red
Shoes (1948). As Brian Easdale’s score
backs a montage of sketches for the
flick's ballet sequence (drawn up by film-
makers Michael Powell and Emeric
Pressburger), on the analog track, Jere-
my Irons reads from Hans Christian An-
dersen’s original fairy tale. Whew.
—GREGORY Р FAGAN
| STYLE
SHIP TO SHORE HOT SHOPPING: NEWPORT
To get top-notch performance from your outerwear, try a Throughout July this alluring, mansion-filled Rhode Island
nautically inspired jacket. Columbia Sportswear's hooded resort town hosts international tennis competitions, sailing re-
Ibex siyle wil keep sou dry, thanks to heavy duty waterproof gattas and music fes-
olyvinyl chloride nylon. Its also functional, with a visor on __tivals. The proper at-
hi ee Eines Севан | CLOTHES LINE
the zipper. Tommy Hilfigers be found in some of ИЛИИ ИИ
yellow rain jacket with details the following shops. | ЛЫКЛЫ AM d
such as a “ТН” sailing insignia Water Bros. (39 i
on the sleeve, a drawstring Memorial Blvd): Mili ror
hood and clasp closures is High-energy threads irlfri
SG EAGT ES aE O E NOM ME
ous nautical wear is the sole ing, plus under- ТЕ
business of Team One New- ground tapes and VENE E р
port. Its Musto Coastal Jacket CDs. e Army & траге Иек to
(pictured here) is made of a Navy Surplus Store CS NY WEDS
heavy-coated nylon, with a (262 Thames St.):
roll-down, fleece-lined hood The best place for
and reflective stripes. Dash’s authentic peacoats
zip-front shell in 100 percent and fied jackets. ®
rib-stop nylon is water-repel- Island Sports (86 A
lent. And at Nautica, style and Aquidneck Ave.): ns
marine inspiration are synony- Rents bikes and sail- from London Fog. For
mous. Its Catamaran poplin boards and sells ath- И
parka has five pockets, a hood leticand windsurfing И Сами Мел Ыше деапь а
and а drawstring waist. Prices threads. Christian Dior blue blazer with gold
range from $25 for the nylon Gangsters (375 т ONIS
shell by Dash to $229 for the Thames St): Comfy EPA eine near trier anne nn]
Musto Coastal Jacket. men’s fashions, such cap touts his new movie, Usual Sus-
as linen pants and pects, and was designed by the
unconstructed її со-в!аг, Stephen Baldwin.
blazers.
twosome travels to
Napa Valley, it’s not
for wine tasting but
for outlet shopping. A
ECO-COMFORT
Sticklers for natural fabrics will be glad to know that
mother earth still has a few surprises left. One of them,
an organic fiber called Tencel, is made from the cellu-
lose in wood pulp. Touted as the hot new fiber of
the Nineties, Tencel is showing up in every-
thing from suits to sport and dress shirts.
But it’s scoring especially big in jeanswear,
attracting top designers such as Giorgio
Armani, who uses itin his A/X line of five-
pocket jeans. Why? Because Tencel has
the soft feel of silk, the absorbency of
cotton and the durability of polyester.
Though similar to rayon, Tencel is typical-
ly machine-washable and biodegradable.
Try a pair of traditional five-pocket
jeans made with Tencel and cotton by
Redford or a self-belted relaxed pair by
Genius Jeans. For casual pants, check out the
Tencel-and-cotton pair by Reunion Menswear.
Wallace Muroya has a great-looking dress
shirt with a tab collar in a Tencel-and-
linen blend, or, for a sportier look,
there's Joop Jeans’ Тепсе! camp shirt.
NO-SWEAT SUN CARE
If your skin itches at the mere thought of ap-
plying a thick, waterproof sunscreen, you'll be
glad to know that manufacturers have improved
their formulas. No longer loaded with irritating
chemicals, new sweatproof and wetproof sun
protection products are lightweight, emol-
lient—and highly recommended by derma-
tologists. A few formulas to consider include
Aramis’ oil- and fragrance-free Lab Series
Sun Protection Spray SPF 15, which is
easy to apply and promises at least 80
minutes of sun protection even after
swimming or vigorous exercise. Cop-
pertone Sport, an SPF 30 waterproof lotion,
smells great, dries quickly and keeps you covered
all day, as do Neutrogena’s SPF 15 and SPF 30
sunblocks. Finally, the SPF 8 Weatherproof Sun
Lotion and SPF 15 Sun Block from Polo Sport by ;
Ralph Lauren contain skin-soothing aloe as well i
as an antioxidant vitamin E derivative.
GOLFWEAR
Subtle prints and jacquards; textured knit fab-
rics; soft collars; neutral browns and blues
Soft, brushed fabrics; long shorts;
pleats; neutral colors
Baseball-style caps; wind- and water-
resistant outerwear; sweater vests
Bold, bright graphic
‚short, bicep-hug
SHIRTS
Preppie plaid pants; blindingly bright
BOTTOMS colors; short shorts; warm-up pants
Plostic visors; synthetic sweaters; anything
that screams “I just played golf”
ACCESSORIES
24
Where & How to Buy on page 159.
\ MAN’S GUIDE DIAMONDS
She’s expecting DIAMONDS.
Dor WRN TO We CAM ely.
The way to а man’s heart is through his stomach,
but the way to a woman’s usually involves a
jeweler. Just think of golf clubs, or season
tickets wrapped in a little black velvet box.
"That's how women feel about diamonds.
Го know diamonds ts to know her. Find out
what she has her heart set on. Is it a pendant,
anniversary band, or ear studs? You can find
out by browsing with her, window shopping,
watching her reactions to other women’s jewelry.
Go by body language, not just by what she
says. Then, once you know the style, you can
concentrate on the diamond.
Like people, no two diamonds are alike.
Formed in the earth millions of years ago
and found in the most remote corners of the
world, rough diamonds are sorted by DeBeers’
experts into over 5,000 grades before they go
on to be cut and polished. So be aware of what
you are buying. Two diamonds of the same
size may vary widely in quality. And if a price
looks too good to be true, it probably is.
Maybe a jeweler is a man’s best friend. You want a diamond you can be proud of. So don't be attracted
то a jeweler because of “bargain prices. Find someone you can trust. Ask questions. Ask friends who've
gone through it. Ask the jeweler you choose why two diamonds that look the same are priced differently.
You want someone who will help you determine quality and value using four characteristics called The #05.
They are: Cus, not the same as shape, but refers to the way the facets or flat surfaces are angled. A better
cut offers more brilliance; Co/or actually, close to no color is rarest; Clarity, the fewer natural marks or
"inclusions" the better, Carat weight, the larger the diamond, usually the more rare. Remember, the more
you know, the more confident you can be in buying a diamond you'll always be proud of.
Learn more. For the booklet “How to buy diamonds you'll he proud to give? call the American Gem Society,
representing fine jewelers upholding gemological standards across the U.S., at 800-340-3028.
Compromise now? Where's your heart? Со for diamonds beyond her wildest dreams. Go for something
that reflects how you really feel. You want nothing less than a diamond as unique as your love. Not to
mention as beautiful as that totally perplexing creature who will wear it.
Diamond Information Center
Sponsored by DeBeers Consolidated Mines, Ltd., Est. 1888.
A diamond is forever.
25
17 Cf Sii Somerse Са. New York NY
Bo. 07:6 Grain Neural Spiri
How refreshingly distinctive.
28
WIRED
ROAD WARRIORS
The latest car security devices won't pre-
vent someone from breaking into your
vehicle, but they make it difficult for a
thief to drive it away. The Logic Lock
from Security Logics ($159), for exam-
ple, disables a vehicle's ignition, starter
and fuel pump using a key fitted with a
computer chip. You insert the key into a
small receptacle inside the car, sending
one of more than 4 billion random codes
to a hidden control module that verifies
the disarming code and programs the
next one. No key, no code, no go. The
Wizard Plus (about $400 installed) from
Winner International disables the same
vital circuits, but it arms and disarms via
a 2"x1" encoder chip that continuously
emits a radio signal. Approach within 30
feet of the yehicle and a receiver mount-
ed inside the engine picks up the signal
and disarms the system. Walk away and
the system automatically arms again. If
you are into James Bond-type gizmos,
check out the Smoke Defense Machine
from US Technology Source. Formerly
known as the Dragon, its perimeter sen-
sor detects an intrusion, and if the vehi-
de is further disturbed, a separate
shock sensor fills the car's cabin with
nontoxic, odorless white smoke that
is intended to keep the thief from
driving away. The price: about
$500 installed.
CYBERFLICKS
Hollywood has a dozen or so computer-
related films in the works. Two sched-
uled for release this summer are Tri-
Star's Johnny Mnemonic and Paramount's
Virtuosity. In the first, Keanu Reeves
plays a courier with a computer chip in
his head. The second pits Denzel Wash-
ington against a computer-generated vil-
Jain. In The Net, a Columbia film, Sandra
Bullock snoops in the wrong computer
file and gets caught up in a murder plot.
Top Gun producers Don Simpson and
Jerry Bruckheimer are preparing /2/ for
Disney, about a serial killer who hunts
victims online, Also in development is
User Hostile, a low-budget action film
about а couple on the run who get help
from their cyberspace buddies. Also, get
ready for an updated Cyrano de Bergerac.
In this version, de Bergerac woos the
woman—you guessed it—online. Now
all we need in the system is the Hacker
with the Heart of Gold.
MULTIPLE PC
PERSONALITIES
Is ita computer? ATV? A
telephone? Chances are,
it’s all three. In fact, now
that computer manufac-
turers are making a big
push into the home mar-
ket, they're coming up
with all kinds of innova-
tive ways to maximize
their systems’ uses. To
save space on the desk-
top, Packard Bell and Compaq have
developed all-in-one multimedia com-
puters that combine a 14-inch color
monitor, a hard drive and a quad-speed
CD-ROM drive in a single unit. Com-
paq's Presario (about $2000) features a
television tuner for watching broadcast
or cable TV, plus a speakerphone and an
answering machine. Packard Bell's Spec-
ийа (about $1400) lias telev and ап
swering machine capabilities, too, and
the Macintosh Performa 638CD (about
$2000) doubles as а ТУ. Acer America
has gone in a more decorative direction.
Its new Acer Acros IBM-compatible PCs
are black, giving them a cool look that
coordinates well with other home enter-
tainment appliances. Appearances
the Acer Acros PCs are powerful. You
can choose among three minitower ma-
chines equipped with eight to 16 mega-
bytes of RAM, Pentium processors (in
75- and 100-megahertz configurations)
anda 1.2 gigabyte hard drive, plus either
a 14.4 or 28.8 data-fax modem, a quad-
speed CD-ROM drive and more than
$1000 worth of preinstalled multimedia
software. The prices: $2000 to $2800.
Motorola's innovative Gold Line Professional Pager (pictured here in actual size) re-
sembles a classic fountain pen and is loaded with impressive features. In addition to a
12-digit back-lit numeric display, the Gold Line has simple two-button operations and
‘announces incoming pages with either с musical chime or Motorola's exclusive Vibra-
Page silent vibrating alert system. When not presenting messages, the pager displays
the time and соп be programmed to sound an alarm. The price: $229. ® Does the
shrunken keyboard on your notebook computer have you typing all kinds of
crazy character combinations? Then check out IBM's latest Think-
pads, the 701C and 701CS ($3B00 to $5600). These four-
pound 486 notebook computers feature Big Blue’s
new Track Write keyboard, which expands
to the size of a standard desktop
model. That means you get
85 full-size keys,
spaced
just the way
they are on your office
machine. The 701C/CS Think-
pods also come with an integrated
14.4 dota-fax modem, two PCMCIA card slots
and infrared technology that allows you to transfer
files from your notebook computer to your desktop PC without
cables or wires. ® Motorola has introduced the first two personal
digital assistants with wireless communications capabilities. The Envoy, based
on General Magic's Magic Cap software, costs between $1000 and $1500, depend-
ing on the package you choose, and the Marco, a PDA that uses Apple’s Newton tech-
nology, is similorly priced. The latter does require handwriting recognition, but Apple
has improved the function considerably since the Newton debuted two years ago
MULTIMEDIA
REVIEWS & NEWS
ON CD-ROM
Hey kids, do you like to rock and roll?
Then check out Vid Grid, an interactive
CD-ROM that turns music videos by
Aerosmith, Jimi Hendrix and Red Hot
Chili Peppers into addictive moving puz-
zles. Each of Vid Grid's five levels re-
quires you to reassemble nine full-motion
videos, which have been jumbled into as
many as 36 blocks. Some of the puzzles
are easy to solve. With Peter Gabriel's
Sledgehammer video, Юг example, you
use his face as а guide. But with quick-
cut titles such as Spoonman by Soundgar-
den, the rapid-fire footage means you
can tackle the puzzle а half dozen times
before you get it right. Fortunately, it’s a
CYBER SCOOP
L/ Prodigy recently became the first
‘= commercial online service to offer
multimedia electronic mail. Cur-
rently avoiloble only to PC users,
this service allows subscribers to
‚create mail thot contains text, dig-
itol photos (processed on floppy
disk by a company called Seotilo
Film Works) and sound clips.
J” Compuserve has even bigger
< plans. Its Worlds Awoy project, a
collaboration with Fujitsu Limited,
is an animated online service thot
will lounch later this summer. Two
former Lucasfilm staffers leod the
design team. For details check out
Fujistu's Cultural Technologies
Web page at hitp://www.worlds
awoy.ossi-com.
good song, and the puzzle changes each
time you play, so it’s never monotonous.
Persistence pays: When your score is re-
ally good (the faster you solve the vid
grids, the more points you rack up),
you're treated to a hidden puzzle of Nir-
vana’s Smells Like Teen Spirit. For those
who prefer mellower
tunes, there’s Country
Vid Grid, with videos
by Reba McEntire,
Vince Gill and Tracy
Byrd. (By Jasmine
Multimedia for Win-
dows, about $50
each.)
Virgin Interactive
Entertainment offers
two excellent science
fiction CD-ROM
games. Creature Shock is a full-screen, 3-D,
animated title set in the distant future.
As a reconnaissance pilot, you are
charged with locating a United Nations
spacecraft that has been incommunicado
Correre kicks alien butt
since it passed Saturn's outer moons a
decade ago. To get to the craft you have
to shoot your way through a solar system
of space debris and alien aircraft. Once
there. you learn why the crew members
have been so quiet: They're all dead,
courtesy ofa shipload of badass invaders
that you have to annihilate to win the
game. But watch your back. Grotesque
creatures such as the Metamorph, the
Crawler and the Eye Monster seem to
come out of nowhere to swallow you
whole or shear your flesh from the bone.
(For DOS, about $70.)
Killer aliens also are the enemy in Vir-
gin's impressive Daedalus Encounter, an ac-
tion adventure that combines 3-D ani-
mation and the best-looking full-motion
video we've seen on CD-ROM—and not
just because it stars Tia Carrere of
Wayne's World. Daedalus is groundbreak-
ing thanks to production methods that
seamlessly blend video and animation.
In one sequence, for example, the actors
wear animated space suits that have
been illustrated around video footage of
their faces. In the wrong hands, this ef-
fect could look cheesy. But Virgin pulls it
off so well that we found ourselves star-
ing at the computer screen in a “How
did they do that?” daze. Likewise, we
cringed when a pack of computer-ren-
dered batlike aliens attacked Carrere's
neck. These visual stunts, combined with
arcade-style action, strategic puzzles and
multiple plot twists, make Daedalus one
of the hottest games of the year. (For
Mac, Windows and 3DO, about $70.)
Mix interactive articles with music and
computer game reviews, toss in samples
of songs by artists as diverse as Digable
Planets and Ween, add a dash of fashion
advice and a lot of humor, and what do
you get? Blender, a bimonthly pop-cul-
ture digital magazine with the frenetic
pace of МТУ. Now in its second issue,
Blender is in no danger of a sophomore
slump. Features on topics such as mod-
ern love, graffiti art and the reality оЃас-
cessing the president online are sharply
written and accented
with vibrant graph-
ics and entertain-
ing man-on-the-
street-style deo
dips. Blenders cre-
ators are into music:
Isue number two
features video inter-
views with the mem-
bers of Veruca Salt
and Deee-Lite's La-
dy Miss Kier and has
you shopping for bi-
cycles with the Gigolo Aunts, responding
to Barry White's romance quiz and
watching Tori Amos, Salt-N-Pepa and
Betty Serveert answer questions on love
and lust in the Nineties. But our favorite
Blender ingredients are the silly ones
There are Refrigerator Johnny, а soap-
opera comic about a Gen X slacker; Bi
er Billy Cooks With Fire, featuring a 77
Top look-alike who shares culinary ad-
vice and spicy recipes; and horoscopes
by guest astrologers. They Might Be Gi-
Creature Shacker
ants were a hoot in the first issue. This
time, Spot, an animated wonder dog,
barks the astrological predictions while
you read along. (By Dennis Publ
for Mac and Windows, $19.95 per issue,
or $49.95 for five.)
ONLINE
You can win cars, trips or even Hawaiian
milkcaps by entering contests on the
World Wide Web. Here are a few give-
aways that you can check out. CD-a-Day
(http://www.seattle.ivi.com/ivi/cd-a-
day.html): Net-surfers who correctly an-
swer IVI Publishing's daily question
qualify to win any CD-ROM in IVI's
library. e Sooter's Home Photo Gallery
(hitp://www.mbnet.mb.ca:80/flatland/soo
ter/): Take a picture, post it here and a
cash prize could be yours. € Book Web
Contest (http://www.ambook.org/book
web/contest/): Win $50 gift certificates to
bookstores nationwide by successfully
completing this monthly challenge.
(When we checked in, we were asked
which of seven listed author tours was
fake. It wasn't easy.) ® Doppler's DTVi
game (http://giant.mindlink.net/dtv/game.
html): Name the monthly mystery word
and win computer paraphernalia.
DIGITAL DUDS
On the Right: Political cortoons by
Jim Berry do little to enliven this dull
disk-based calendar and planner.
Interactive Sailing: Bad grophics
induce seo D-ROM sickness in this
otherwise ambitious ottempt to
teach sailing skills by computer.
Yes Active: Just soy no to this poor
excuse for a rock CD-ROM—un-
less, of course, you want to use the
cool Technicolor disc as a cooster.
WHERE & HOW TO BUY ON PAGE 158.
29
By KEVIN COOK
WHATS ON the radio tonight? Melissa
Etheridge, Counting Crows, some
mouth-breathing sports talker calling
from his car, maybe a wry ode to navel
lint on NPR. Yawn, But wait—here's a
midget kleptomaniac in drag. Here's a
mud-wrestling voyeur and a guy who
swears his penis is square. Here’s José,
who wants to blow up his balls, and
Steve, a long-distance ejaculator. Here's
a sexpert taking stock of “the vaginal
barrel” after you've spent years looking
for the trigger. It's sex talk radio, riding.
bare-butt to rescue America’s ears from
the same old ditto—radio designed to
keep you and the ratings up all night.
Erin Somers: “For making that old penis
taste a little better, Sarah, go to the grocery
and get one of those plastic honey bears. Put
that honey right on your man. It's gonna make
everything sweeter ——
Sarah: Hee-hee.
Somers: Regarding the taste of semen, there.
is nothing wrong with spitting ош. That's
our choice, and remember that as a woman,
Sarah!
Somers, radio's late-night succubus of
the South, has the only show that leaves
a wet spot on the dial. The host of Passion
Phones straddles a fine line between in-
formation and raunch six nights a week
on Miami’s WIOD, dispensing tips on
everything from toe-licking to giving
head. When she took over a “relation-
shippy” call-in show 18 months ago, the
ratings were barely measurable. Somers
spurred interest with tales of her own
sex life, including premarital stripteases
and “plenty of oral sex, which I love to
give and receive.” Permissive but safely
suburban (“1 personally am not into rim-
), she doesn't mind featuring stuff
like “snowballing,” in which a woman
fellates a man and then kisses him, pass-
ing his semen into his mouth. It then
goes back and forth until somebody calls
the ski patrol. "It's a yoyeuristic show,”
she admits. Today her husband can't
bear to listen, but the show is a hit and
Somers can't wait to get to the studio.
“With HIV, the religious right, psycho
men and psycho women, this is the most
screwed-up time ever for sex,” she says.
But it's the perfect time for eargasms.
Dr. Ruth Westheimer pioneered sex
talk radio 15 years ago, but Dr. Ruth
never purred Somers-style about her
own sexual stylings. This is sex shock ra-
dio, and with sports talk waning, it's the
new game in Florida, New York, Atlanta,
New Orleans and even Salt Lake City,
where chubby orgasmatron Donna
Sparks Williams hosts a nooner called
Naked Lunch. Porn star Scka hosts an au-
ral sex show on Chicago's WLUP. “A lot
30 of talk stations are looking for a younger,
Eargasms: The new tend in aural sex.
Sex talk
radio heats up
the airwaves.
hipper audience, and they're going to
sex talk,” says industry watcher Randall
Bloomquist. who writes for the trade
publication Radio & Records. “Then there
are the music stations looking to make
inroads into talk radio. They're doing
it, too.”
Eargasms are a good fit for a time
when talking about sex is safer and more
socially correct than doing it. Don't tell
Newt, but while conservative epochs
such as the Fifties and mid-Nineties may
chill sexual activity, they always spawn a
corresponding burst of secondhand
thrills.
It’s Loveline, it’s your bleeping time.
"That jingle introduces the best sex
chatter of all. Loveline on KROQ has
been Los Angeles’ number one nij
time show of the Nineties. It stars nice
guy Dr. Drew Pinsky and a tattooed,
spike-haired, nose-pierced punk named
Riki Rachtman, former host of МТУ”
Headbangers Ball. Celeb guests run the
gamut from Debbie Gibson to Ice-T, but
the hosts make the show go. Dr. Pinsky,
one of the few radio docs who's a real
M.D., steadies loose cannon Rachtman,
who spends airtime guzzling coffee and
tossing a rubber fish at the control
board, trying to knock the station off the
air. Both give heartfelt advice to their
mostly young callers. “People don't
know who the hell they can talk to. We're
their friends," Rachtman says. "You get
facts from Drew and the street-level
truth from me.” The other night Racht-
man corrected the doctor: “Drew,
there's nothing weird about a four-foot
shoplifting transvestite!” But, like Pin-
sky, he is serious about the life-breaking
trouble some callers face, including such
subjects as AIDS or deciding at the age
of 15 whether to get an abortion. “Any-
body can talk about fucking. We shock
because we talk about what's real,” he
explains. Co-host Pinsky worries quietly
about competition from "dirty talk
shows” that offer only titillation. Racht-
man, who does nothing quietly, snarls at
competitors. “I know they're out there,”
he says, “and they all suck.”
John, the mud-urestling voyeur: I like
mud-wrestling porno tapes. I got my two girl-
friends to fight, and I taped it.
Dr. Judy Kuriansky: You have a problem
getting close to people. Take a painting class
ога music class, meet somebody and go to the
movies and hold hands.
Dr. Kuriansky is sex talk queen in
Gotham. Her Love Phones on Z-100FM is
a blatant knockoff of Loveline. Along with
rock-and-roll guests and a loudmouth
sidekick, Kuriansky spouts Cosmo-style
counsel, urging angry men to "remem-
ber the big C—cuddling.” This is a sex-
pert whose press kit calls her “downright
cool!” and who advises upright honesty
and caring even to a caller who says he
raped his cat. But Love Phones’ hang-up
isn't just Kuriansky's nasal keening or
the fact that everybody talks at once. It's
that Kuriansky stayed on and Aero-
smith's Steven Tyler left after his stint as
honorary love doctor. Tyler bopped into
the studio singing, “If men bled, would
tampons be free?” He warned against
the “numbness and derailment” you get
from rubbing cocaine on your penis be-
fore sex. He praised his wife, conceded
he has sex only twice a week, recounted
the real-life tale behind Love in an Eleva-
tor and told a smitten female fan, “As
long as I have a face, you have a place
to sit.”
Here's Tyler advising caller Steve, the
long-distance ejaculator:
LDE: My problem is my girlfriend likes me
to release come all over her. And the come
comes out in such large amounts that one time
it went into her eye. Now I'm scared to do it.
Tyler: Hmmm. Did she say the experience
for her was not fun? Did it not get her off?
LDE: It did, but I thought something dan-
gerous would happen ——
Dler: Like what? A baby growin’ out of her
lid?
LDE: I thought she'd go blind.
Dler: Well, did she?
LDE: No, but she couldn't see for three
days.
Dler: Safety goggles!
No pro therapist could therapize bet-
ter than that. Except maybe to suggest a
wet suit, too.
Satisfying taste
and lower tar.
You make the call.
SURGEON GENERAL'S WARNING: Cigarette Ч Su
Smoke Contains Carbon Monoxide.
perc
— : by ETC method.
— D Br,
„= ; " a
> —. p
ROCK
PORTISHEAD'S Dummy (Go Discs/London)
is dark, sexy and soulful. It was a word-
of-mouth hit before the band became an
MTV favorite. Coming out of Bristol,
England, vocalist Beth Gibbons, key-
boardist Geoff Barrow and guitarist
Adrian Utley create a blend of brittle
techno ambience, dusty hip-hop samples
and plaintive melodies.
Gibbons has a small, cool voice that
keeps optimism at arm's length. On Л
Could Be Sweet, Sour Times and the al-
bum's most enticing cut, Wandering Siar,
she sing-talks her way through a mini-
тайы landscape. Affirmation and joy
have no home on this album. Portishead
is easy listening for those who always
wear black. —NELSON GEORGE
Tribute albums are usually as enjoy-
able as a rubber-chicken dinner. Encomi-
um: A Tribute to Led Zeppelin (Atlantic) is a
delightful exception. It's faithful to the
band’s spirit and original enough to
make it just plain fun. Most Zep songs
were built around great riffs. Helmet,
with Jesus Lizard’s David Yow on vocals,
tosses Custard Pie in your face with fero-
cious lunacy. The Rollins Band drags
Four Sticks, bristling with angst, attitude
and a thunderous beat. into the Nineties.
But the real kick comes from hearing
bands you never thought had it in them
pull out the stops. Stone Temple Pilots"
semiacoustic reading of Dancing Days is a
revelation. Grammy queen Sheryl Crow
breathes edgy passion into the Fifties
camp of D'yer Mak'er. And 4 Non
Blondes’ over-the-top rendition of Misty
Mountain Hop is pure bliss. Even Blind
Melon and Big Head Todd come
through. Of course, Zep could deliver
pomp as well as circumstance, as is un-
fortunately represented here with
mawkish efforts by Duran Duran, Never
the Bride and Tori Amos. Program your
CD player accordingly,
Slash's Snakepit's it’s Five O'Clock Some-
where (Geffen) is the record many hoped
Guns п' Roses would make after their
raging debut. Instead, we got the bloat-
ed excess of Use Your Illusion. Here, Slash
plays Keith sans Mick, redeeming his
hard-rock credentials with some ambi-
tious but not overblown songs. Eric Do-
ver delivers Ах! Rose's intensity without
the histrionics. —VIC GARBARINI
Rock and roll gocs through cycles of
dressing up and dressing down. Various
popsters and hair bands dominated
MTV in the Eighties. Then, with the ar-
rival of grunge, everybody had to dress
down. Can it be time again to dress up?
If so. I hope it’s the Voluptuous Horror
of Karen Black setting the trend. Led
32 by vocalist Kembra Pfahler and guitarist
Portishead is по Dummy.
Dark thoughts from
Portishead and РЈ. Harvey
and a tribute to Led Zep.
Samoa, VHKB draws inspiration from
the great soul revues of the late Sixties
and from glam-horror acts such as Alice
Cooper. In VHKB's club act, Pfahler
paints her teeth black and her body blue
and cavorts with oddly costumed
dancers. Unlike GWAR, VHKB doesn't
suck musically, On Voluptuous Horror's
second album, The Anti-Naturalists (Triple
X), Samoa plays metallic riffs in an accu-
rate but slashing style that achieves the
desired raucousness without hiding be-
hind a wash of noise. Pfahler howls and
grumps hilariously about traditional fe-
male roles, sounding like a rougher ver-
sion of the Shangri-Las. Halloween
every night—it's an idea whose time has
come again. —CHARLES М. YOUNG
I haven't thought much of PJ. Har-
vey's previous three albums, but To Bring
You My Love (Island) proves that was a
mistake. At her best, as on Meet Ze Mon-
sta and Стоп Billy, Polly Jean Harvey
sings with as much conviction, heart and
power as Patti Smith (though without
Smith’s gift for the telling line). The
dirty, distorted, minimal music that
drives the title track creates a
scary cnough to qualify аз роп
er times, as on Working for the Man, she
combines this sinister quality with a se-
ductive false innocence. If she mumbled
a little less, she would probably be irre-
ible. Harvey is a tough, literate
woman trying desperately, and with
some success, to get a grip on her sexu-
ality. Unfortunately, Harvey also some-
times tries to sing like a diva. In the stu-
pefying first verse and chorus of Teclo,
this effort brings truly dire results: Annie
Lennox, Lisa Stansfield or Patti Labelle
she ain't. Such archmannerism killed
English rock. It would certainly be
a shame to lose such a gifted artist to
pretension.
Ofall the songwriters of the pre-Dylan
era, Doc Pomus maintained his credibili-
ty and enthusiasm the longest. This trib-
ute to Pomus, Till the Night Is Gone (For-
ward/Rhino)—which contains many
good performances and a couple of
great ones—accords him his due. The
great ones are Dylan's Boogie Woogie
Country Girl and Dion's Turn Me Loose.
The good ones come from performers
such as Rosanne Cash, the Band, B.B.
King, Los Lobos, Shawn Colvin and
John Hiatt.
On Steve Winwood's four-CD collec-
tion The Finer Things (Island Chronicles),
the slow, sad deterioration of blue-eyed
soul into the hackwork of modern adult
pop is lovingly traced. With the Spencer
Davis Group, Traffic and even Blind
Faith, Winwood cmerged as England's
answer to Little Stevie Wonder. He still
finds attractive paths between blues and
folk, but, unfortunately, in his solo ca-
reer Winwood grinds out junk like Roll
With It with all the sheen of an Armani
model, —DAVE MARSH
R&B
Once or twice a year, British dance
music presents an act that outsiders can
relate to, usually a beat-master combo
such as Soul II Soul, Saint Etienne,
Stereolab, M People or Portishead.
Tricky, coming out of the loose collective
that spawned Massive Attack, leaves
most of the singing to a young woman
named Alison Goldfrapp and saves his
best tricks for the mix. His debut album,
Maxinquaye (Island), maintains a funky,
slow groove that owes much to dub, am-
bient techno, low-fi and several strains of
hip-hop. On Hour of Chaos Goldfrapp's
unlikely take on Public Enemy's Black
Steel should get your attention. So
should the racy Abbaon Fat Track.
Part disco and house, part funk-reg-
gae, the all-techno Dance Hits U.K. (Moon-
shine Music) is another way to get to
British dance music, track by catchy
track. — ROBERT CHRISTGAU
Adina Howard has an interesting
voice, but her record company markets
her derriere. The visuals for her debut,
Do You Wanne Ride? (East West), are of her
е. The songs play off this
h You Got Me Humpin'.
FAST TRACKS
STYLE CHAT DEPARTMENT: Little Richard
stars in a major exhibit at the Rock-
and-Roll Hall of Fame. He'll give a
guided tour of four decades of rock-
and-roll fashion in 12 minutes. Film-
maker Ethan Russell said, “We're go-
ing to Gump him.” That means when
visitors see a Tina Turner dress or the
Beatles’ Sgt. Pepper suits, Little Richard
will be there—even showing Elvis how
10 dance.
REELING AND ROCKING: Bad Boys, the
comedy starring mith and Martin
Lawrence, has songs by Babyface, War-
ren G, Inner Circle and Da Brat on the
soundtrack. ... The soundtrack for To
Wong Foo With Love, Julie Newmar will
likely include a Labelle reunion, Ma-
donna, Cyndi Lauper, TLC and Mary J.
Blige. . . . The Duke of Groove, starring
Uma Thurman, Keifer Sutherland and
Kate Capshaw, is the story of a Seven-
ties party at which a young boy finds
himself with Janis Joplin. It will air on
Showtime. . . . Rosanna Arquette is film-
inga TV pilot for Fox TV titled Daisy
and Chess, in which she plays a single
mother and former groupie.
NEWSBREAKS: A new Lenny Kravitz al-
bum will be out in September and
he'll tour after that. ... Lollapalooza
'95 has its own Internet site. There
will be weekly interactive press con-
ferences and artists will be able to talk
with the media. . . . Vince Gill's annual
golf tournament, the Vinny, is taking
place right about now in Tennessee.
Professionals, amateurs and celebri-
Чез are playing and Gill will per-
form. . . . Quincy Jones’ next album will
have Babyface, Queen Latifah and Tevin
Campbell among the guest perform-
ers. . . . Check out the Blues Stuff
catalog, a mail-order marketplace of
memorabilia, collectibles and other
stuff including videos, T-shirts, lapel
pins and framed original blues 78s.
Call 800-sLues-11 or fax 415-898-
3647. . . . Jim Beam's Third Annual
Country Music Talent Search is on
until August 10. Country bands and
musicians can request an entry form
from Jim Beam Talent Search, РО.
Box 5016, Ronks, PA 17573. Last
year’s winner is on the verge of sign-
ing a record deal. . . . The live acoustic
album that Heort recorded last sum-
mer with John Poul Jones producing
just came out. Jones joined Heart on
piano, bass and mandolin. Take that,
Jimmy and Robert. All-4-One is half
finished with the follow-up to its
smash debut album. The band is wait-
ing for some busy celebrity songwrit-
ers and producers to find the studio
time. . . . The Chinese government
made Roxette change its lyrics to suit
Beijing. “Making love to you” became
“making up to you.” According to
Rock & Rap Confidential, a country that
has more people than any other
ought to have “made its peace with
getting a piece”. . . . Rock & Rap also
reports that San Antonio Spurs bad
boy Dennis Rodman went to see Pearl
Jam in Seattle and has been sporting
its T-shirt during interviews. . . . The
archives of the famed radio show The
King Biscuit Flower Hour have been
bought by a record label of the same
name. This treasure includes 450
artists and 1000 performances. The
first releases have hit the record
stores and include America, Kingfish
(featuring Bob Weir), Deep Purple, 10сс
and Canned Heat, with many more to
follow. . . . A forthcoming Mervin Gaye
tribute album will include a duet with
Bono and cuts by Speech, Lisa Stansfield
and daughter Nona Gaye. A TV special
will coincide with the LP's release.
— BARBARA NELLIS
While it’s hard to tell whether Howard
wants a Grammy or a photo spread, her
ballad You Don't Have to Cry suggests
there’s more to her voice than all this
silliness. — NELSON GEORGE
FOLK
At 48, John Prine is one of those guys
who haven't lost a step. He's not espe-
cially prolific—tost Dogs & Mixed Blessings
(Oh Boy, 33 Music Square West, Suite
102A, Nashville, TN 37203) is only his
third album in a decade—but he rarely
writes a foolish line. And although Prine
is a folkie, nobody is more adept at pin.
ning down the day-to-day details of ordi-
nary, fucked-up lives. He's warm, he's
sharp, he’s funny, he’s weird, and his
latest release is varied and consistent
enough to outsell his 1991 album, The
Missing Years. See for yourself.
— ROBERT CHRISTGAU
‘The border music of Texas combines
the polka rhythms of German immi-
grants with Mexican folk melodies. On
Frontejos (Rounder) Tish Hinojosa sings
this especially joyous music with such
verve that you'll be happy through alll 12
cuts, even the sad songs.
As much a guitar hero as a singer,
Chris Smither tinges his folk music with
the blues and takes you to a haunted
place in your soul on Up on the Lowdown
(Hightone). If you like pensive, this is
just about as good as it gets.
— CHARLES М. YOUNG
COUNTRY
Oklahoma-born desperado Ray Wylie
Hubbard wrote the Jerry Jeff Walker hit
Up Against the Wall, Redneck Mother,
which became the anthem for the Texas
outlaw movement of the early Seventies.
Hubbard says that song became his jack-
et and he had to wear it. But Hubbard’s
Loco Gringo’s Lament (Deja Disc) is a coat of
a different color, a down-to-earth repre-
sentation of the detailed folk idiom in
which he was raised. Now lifted from a
Texas honky-tonk fog at the age of 48,
Hubbard presents a dozen songs of spir-
itual deliverance and measured opti-
mism. The breakthrough track is The
Messenger. A disciple of Ramblin’ Jack El-
liott and Woody Guthrie, Hubbard finds
his phrasing in spacious arrangements
of cello, dobro, slide and acoustic guitar.
One of the evergreen tracks is the sweet-
ly subtle Love Never Dies, but the record’s
most provocative turn comes in Wanna
Rock and Roll, a hard-driving story about
sex and sin framed by his empathetic vo-
cals and Terry Ware's sizzling bottleneck
guitar. Like Billy Joe Shaver and Mickey
Newbury before him, Ray Wylie Hub-
bard is waiting to be rediscovered. Loco
Gringo is a pleasure for old and new fans
alike. —DAVE HOEKSTRA
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Ву DIGBY DIEHL
ELMORE LEONARD has the best ear for dia-
logue in the crime-writing biz. What his
fans often miss, however, is how artfully
he builds plot, drama, character and
emotional texture through the easy,
amusing banter in his novels. In Riding
the Rap (Delacorte) he gives enough sinis-
ter edge to the chatter among the bum-
bling bad guys that you never forget
they're dangerous, even while you laugh
at their antics. Adding a softer element
to the story, he insinuates sweet sceds of
romance into the suspicious exchanges
between 26-year-old Reverend Dawn
Navarro—'certified medium and spiri-
tualist”—and crusty middle-aged federal
marshal Raylan Givens.
In this noyel, retired Miami bookie
Harry Arno hires Bobby Deo, a Puerto
Rican bounty hunter, to collect $16,500
in gambling debts from а charming
flake, Warren “Chip” Ganz III. Howev-
er, when Bobby arrives at Chip's beach
house in moneyed Manalapan, he finds
Louis Lewis, a Bahamian who was in
state prison with Bobby. The two join
Ghip in a scheme to kidnap Harry, with
the assistance of Reverend Dawn, and to
hold him hostage for a large chunk of
his ill-gotten retirement fund. It’s their
bad luck that relentless lawman Givens
comes looking for Harry. The incompe-
tent kidnappers become frantic as Givens
zeros in and their get-rich-quick scheme
unravels. Under Leonard's control, Rid-
ing the Rap glides to a conclusion both vi-
olent and funny.
Leonard is inspired by the seemingly
infinite varieties of Florida lowlife. His
crime-writing colleague Robert Parker
sticks with Spenser and the detective's
witty inamorata, Susan (and his partner,
Hawk). This trio stays fresh by discov-
ering a different crime venue in the
Boston area for each new novel. The lat-
est, Thin Air (Putnam), takes Spenser to
the crumbling Hispanic mill town of
Proctor, Massachusetts. There, a local
drug syndicate leader has kidnapped a
former girlfriend, Lisa St. Claire, who
has recently married a cop. Searching
for clues to her whereabouts, Spenser
digs into Lisa's past and discovers that
she was once a hooker.
Parker has an impressive ability to
take readers into unfamiliar territory—
in this instance, the Hispanic under-
world—and illuminate it in a few short,
powerful scenes. He gives Spenser a
Spanish-speaking sidekick, Chollo, for
this adventure and guides him through
an investigation of the social milieu at
Club del Aguadillano, encounters with
the local cops and the parish priest and
some chats with the town jefe. He juxta-
36 poses scenes of Spenser circling for the
Leonard's Riding the Rap.
Florida lowlife, bumbling
bad guys, raunchy sex
and great mysteries.
kill with terrified monologs from Lisa,
who is waiting to be rescued. The climax,
in which Spenser and Chollo storm the
drug lord's bunker, is full of action, sus-
pense and thrills that provide a satisfy-
ing finish to Parker’s 22nd book in the
Spenser series.
Also this month, three noteworthy
novels by relative newcomers to crime
fiction: The Edge of the Crazies (Hyperion)
by Jamie Harrison, Strangers at the Gate
(Random House) by Leonard Gross and
The Plan (Morrow) by Stephen Cannell.
When Hollywood types mix with local
eccentrics in Blue Deer, Montana, there
are plenty of suspects for sheriff Jules
Clement to consider for a series of mur-
ders. Harrison keeps us laughing and
guessing whodunit. Gross, a former for-
cign correspondent for Look magazine,
examines the rapid growth of the Hong
Kong Triad in San Francisco in a fast-
paced thriller about a TV reporter at-
tacked by Chinese thugs. Cannell, an
Emmy-winning TV writer and producer,
proves he can spin out a thriller with the
best of them in this story about a clever
Mafia conspiracy to putits own politician
in the White House.
If nothing else, Heidi Matison's Му
League Stripper (Arcade) will increase the
number of male applicants to Brown
University. This is the true story of a stu-
dent who couldn't make her tuition bill
by waiting tables and cleaning houses.
She began stripping at the Foxy Lady, a
men's dub near the Brown campus, and
quickly became a hot attraction. She
meditates on the incongruities of her
double life, the Brown code of political
correctness, her parents' shock and her
ethical qualms. But the most entertain-
ing and informative portions of this live-
ly confessional are her commentaries on
the action in the dub and on the life
backstage. She dissects the psychology of
stripper and ogler with titillating insight
and provides an honest and thoughtful
look at the business of sexual fantasy.
Topping From Below (St. Martin's) is a
new novel by Laura Reese that tackles
the subject of sexual obsession. Its pow-
erful erotic undertow immediately pulls
the reader into sensuously described
sadomasochistic rituals and the related
$ obsessions of murder, sisterhood and
love. Franny Tibbs is discovered dead in
her apartment with duct tape across her
mouth and around the limbs of her
nude body. Marks on her body indicate
that she was tortured before she died.
Her sister Nora is convinced that Fran-
пу'з sadistic lover, Michael, is the mur-
derer. She subjects herself to his sexual
games of degradation and pain in order
to find the evidence to convict him.
Gradually, she discovers that she likes
S&M and that she is falling in love with
Michael. Topping From Below has a com-
pelling plot intertwined with steamy
scenes. When's the last time you read
raunchy sex and a good mystery in the
same book?
BOOK BAG
The Sex Revolts: Gender, Rebellion and Rock
and Roll (Harvard University), by Simon
Reynolds and Joy Press: Alongside the
story of male-warrior rock, this blend
of music criticism and cultural studies
traces the history of female rebellion in
rock, from Janis to the Slits.
Bootleg: The Secret History of the Other
Recording Industry (St. Martin's), by Clin-
ton Heylin: In 1969 a collection of unre-
leased recordings by Bob Dylan—culled
from home sessions and Woodstock—
appeared in a small cluster of indepen-
dent Los Angeles record stores. This was
the first rock bootleg, and it spawned the
multimillion-dollar industry that contin-
ves to thrive today.
The Slightly Older Guy (Simon & Schus-
ter), by Bruce Jay Friedman: One of our
funniest novelists offers a comic guide to
those years of chin fat, prostate trouble,
baldness and snickering feminists.
Permanent Midnight: A Memoir (Warner),
by Jerry Stahl: A vivid, agonizing tale of
drug addiction by a man choking on his
own laughter. This should be required
reading in high schools because, in spite
of the yuks, it’s not funny at all.
I t was a tough job, but somebody had
to do it. Last week, I talked with
every divorced father in America. Boy,
am I tired . . . and you should see my
phone bill!
I was conducting the first national
Beatdead Dads poll. The results were as-
tounding. Forget the image of the angry
divorced father. Such а person does not
exist. My Beatdead Dads poll proves
that divorced noncustodial fathers live in
a state of perpetual bliss.
It turns out that those of us who have
lost our kids in custody cases and have
been assigned hefty and ever-increasing
child support payments actually love the
legal system in which we find ourselves
entrapped. Yes, it’s true. Scratch a di-
vorced dad and you'll find a happy
camper.
Consider these startling statistics:
(1) Fully 100 percent of the fathers
polled agree with the statement that “It
15 totally fair and just that, in some nine
out of ten divorces, sole custody of the
children is awarded to the mother.”
Ronald Lysenko of Caratunk, Maine
spoke for all divorced fathers when he
said, “Those numbers may seem unbal-
anced, but you would have to be para-
noid to assume that custody laws are ap-
plied to fathers unfairly. I lost custody of
my children, and 1 deserved it. Even
though my ex-wife is a test pilot for
NASA during the day and a bouncer at a
topless bar at night, she has the time to
raise our 16 children properly. How
could I, a poor man, hope to match her
nurturing abilities? I am not worthy,
which is why, even though she earns
three times as much as I do, I pay for
most of the kids’ expenses. It is my way
of apologizing for being a man.”
(2) An incredible 101 percent of all di-
vorced dads agree with the statement
that “Marcia Clark, the lead prosecutor
in the O.J. Simpson case, should be able
to buy as many business outfits as she
needs with her ex-husband's child sup-
port money—and if it's not enough, she
should be permitted to get more bucks
from him.”
Myron Mincemold of Coyote, Utah
said it best: “Marcia Clark makes a paltry
$96,000 a year. She is obviously another
oppressed woman in a corrupt patriar-
chal society. Assuming that Clark’s busi-
ness clothing (including shoes) costs
about $500 per outfit, her annual sal-
By ASA BABER
THE BEATDEAD
DADS POLL
ary could buy her only 192 complete
changes of clothes. But there are 365
days in a year. What is this victimized
and persecuted woman supposed to do
for the other 173 days? Wear the same
clothes more than once? Clearly, Clark
needs another $96,000 from her ex-hus-
band so she can dress professionally
year-round. I send my child support, as
ordered by the court, directly to my ex-
wife's charge account at Saks. And I do it
happily, because a well-dressed mom is а
great thing to behold.”
(3) An amazing 102 percent of the
men polled agree that “It is irrelevant
that the General Accounting Office has
determined that some 14 percent of the
fathers who supposedly owe child sup-
port are dead, and approximately 66
percent of fathers who owe child sup-
port cannot afford to pay the amount or-
dered. It is also irrelevant that when fa-
thers receive visitation privileges, almost
80 percent pay their full child support,
and when fathers receive joint custody,
more than 90 percent of them pay full
child support. Those numbers are purc-
ly coincidental, and there is absolutely
no connection between treating fathers
fairly and having them cooperate with
the system.”
Gregory Sanskrit of Megargel, Ala-
bama summarized it this way: “I am
most offended by those dead fathers who
don't pay child support. I believe they
should be included in the statistics about
deadbeat dads. What are those stu
corpses doing with their money, апу
Spending it on beer and licentious wom-
en? It's tragic. Men, even when they are
dead and buried, are pigs.”
(4) Acool 104 percent of the divorced
fathers interviewed agree with the prop-
osition that “No matter the reason, if a
father is delinquent in his child support
payments, the authorities should jail
him, attach his assets, garnishee his
wages, suspend his driver’s license (and
all other professional licenses), intercept
his state and federal tax refunds, charge
him for both his ex-wife's and his own le-
gal fees and brand his forehead with the
word DEADBEAT. If, on the other hand,
the mother denies the father his legally
assigned time with his children, if she
spends his child support money on her-
self instead of on the kids and if she
harasses her ex-husband with excessive
legal actions and false charges, the au-
thorities should leave her alone. Be-
cause, after all. motherhood is sacred.”
Barney Bindleshaft of Fort Dick, Texas
speaks for all of us when he says, “I am
sick of hearing any suggestions that, in
practice, the awarding of child support is
basically an arbitrary income tax on di-
vorced fathers. So what if divorced dads
find their kids unfairly taken from them
and then have to pay for that privilege?
Or that a divorced dad often pays mon-
ey to a person who does not have to ac-
count for the expenditures of that money
and who may not spend it on the chil-
dren? Fathers don't give a damn what
happens to their kids, so why should
they care where the money goes? Take it
like a man. Pay up and shut up, I say.”
(5) A phenomenal 200 percent of the
fathers I spoke with in the Beatdead
Dads poll approved of current custody
and child support laws and practices. To
aman, there were no complaints.
Let Russell Fwimp of Gibson City, Illi-
nois wrap it up: “I love the fact that the
government can discontinue my paren-
tal status and then tax me for it. It re-
minds me of my sunny days in the Sovi-
et Union. And as any man will tell you,
there's nothing like a police state to
bring joy and light to a guy's life.”
37
THE PLAYBOY ADVISOR
И love giving my boyfriend blow jobs,
and he enjoys getting them. The trouble
is, I want him to crave them! Do you
have any suggestions for fine-tuning my
technique? I've always imagined being
so good that he would greet me at the
door one day after work, weak with de-
sire, begging me to suck him off.—C.T.,
Rapid City, South Dakota.
The next time you go down on your
boyfriend, prop his head on a pillow to make
sure he can see what you're doing. Tell him
how hot he is, how much you love sucking
him and how hard and beautiful he is. Let
him know that you're in no hurry. With his
erection in your mouth, begin to hum softly
(the warmth of your breath and the vibrations
on his cock will drive him crazy with desire).
At that point, we'd be happy as clams, but
were easy. Dr. Judy Kurianshy, author of
“Generation Sex,” offers a description of the
classic В] that had us fidgeting in our seats:
“Start licking at the tip, gently. Circle your
tongue around the head, and then slide the
head into your mouth. Create suction and
roll your tongue around the head, lingering
on the frenulum (the underside of the tip
where the ridge meets the shaft). There’s no
need 10 bob your head up and down. Slip
your mouth over the tip and run your moist-
ened lips up and down the sides of the shaft
uf the penis (while yuu caress the heul with
your hand) and return to slipping the head
inside your mouth. Lower your mouth far-
ther down on his erection each time. Or close
your lips around the head, licking the frenu-
lum, and grasp the shaft with one or both
hands to give him the sensation of being in-
side you.” There will be a test in the morn-
ing, class, so please prepare.
Lovemaking with my husband was an
icy affair for years. He was always warm
and 1 was always cold. One night T put
ona mohair sweater to keep warm. Dur-
ing our lovemaking I noticed that my
husband snuggled in and couldn't keep
his hands off me. I've found that the
more I pile on, the better. One time 1
wore mohair over a bra and garter, and I
also knitted a nightie out of angora yarn.
My husband says he loves touching the
thick clothing, then digging underneath
it to caress me. I've noticed in the mean-
time that other men are very touch-ori-
ented too. Wear a thick, fuzzy sweater
to the office one day and watch how
many men strike up a conversation with
you, eventually patting you on the shoul-
der or touching you innocently in some
way.—R.A., Portland, Oregon.
You've discovered a sexual secret that the
Eskimo people have knoum for centuries: The
warmest part of a woman is under her coat.
It's no surprise that the contrast between the
layers of thick, fuzzy nightclothes and the
smooth, soft woman underneath drives your
guy wild—it appeals to his sense of mystery.
The erotic power of touch is often overlooked
in the rush to intercourse. Many couples find
that concentrated kinesthesia creates a sense
of trust and relaxation that spills over into
the relationship. Your creativity tickles our
fancy. Ihe only downside 15 that you always
know what you're getting for Christmas.
IM, 33-year-old boyfriend sometimes
has trouble getting it up. He's the pic-
ture of mental health, and neither of us
thinks the problem relates to issues in
our relationship. He's physically fit, too,
except that he has high cholesterol—268
at his last check. Could there be an erec-
tion-cholesterol connection?—J.U., Fort
Dodge, Iowa.
Possibly. In a study of 3250 men reported
in the ‘American Journal of Epidemiology,”
researchers found that the higher a subjects
cholesterol, the more likely he was to report
problems getting and maintaining an erec-
tion. Those with cholesterol levels above 240
were nearly twice as likely to report erection
problems as men who had lower levels (180
milligrams per deciliter of blood or less).
Other studies have shown that high levels of
fatty acids impair blood flow into the penis
and interfere with the muscles involved in
erections. One more reason for men to reduce
the cholesterol and fat in their diets.
A vidco store derk told me to play
stored videos at least once a ycar to keep
them from deteriorating. I'm skeptical.
Is that a good way to preserve video?—
S.E., Chicago, Illinois.
Despite what some manufacturers would
have you believe, video is not forever. (No
doubt Tonya Harding will be relieved to hear.
ILLUSTRATION BY PATER SATO
that.) Chances are that the video you made
last winter in Rio or your prized copy of
“Sodomania 9” will lose its luster after five
or ten years, even with better-than-average
storage conditions. You can still try to pre-
serve the tapes for as long as possible. Re-
winding, fast-forwarding or playing your
tapes through completely at least once every
one to three years can help prevent defor-
mation, expansion, contraction or stickiness
caused by temperature changes, dustand hu-
midity. Videophiles recommend backing up
analog tapes every five years, and many ea-
gerly await the first digital videocassettes,
which will allow duplication without loss of
picture or sound quality (they're expected to
hit the market next year). Besides airing
your tapes regularly, store them vertically
‘and completely rewound to avoid warping
and bleed-through.
V own а lot of leather furniture and
dothing, each with a slightly different
recommendation on cleaning and care.
Rather than buying a closetful of prod-
ucts, is there a simple way to clean all my
leather stuff?—PP, Atlanta, Georgia.
Because leather comes in several grades
and many textures, you need to be careful not
to stray far from the cleaning advice on the
labels. In general, you can use a sofi, dry
cloth to wipe away dust and dirt on апу
leather. If the grime is more serious than
that, you need to determine if the leather has
been treated with a protective sealant (in
most cases, it will have a polished look). Pro-
tected leathers should be able to withstand a
warm water wipe-down and air-dry. Unpro-
tected leather, which is softer and darkens
more easily when it comes in contact with the
oil on your skin, presents more of a chal-
lenge. The color of the suede or leather is
likely to change when cleaned, so be sure to
color-test first.
M, girlfriend enjoys sunbathing top-
less on our patio, but we have a nosy
neighbor who has complained to the
manager of our condo complex. We
were asked to respect the local laws
against indecent exposure, even though
our neighbor had to stand on a chair to
see over the fence (she was pruning a
tree). What are our rights? I can under-
stand the concern if my girlfriend were
walking down the street topless, but this
seems more of an invasion of our priva
cy than of our neighbor's.—M.C., Hunt-
ington Beach, California,
In our book, if you have a fence that blocks
the sight line of passersby, your exposure
shouldn't be considered indecent unless you
are on a trampoline. That interpretation
may not jibe with the real estate or municipal
codes in Huntington Beach, however. Call a
lawyer and ask how far your right to privacy 39
PLAYBOY
40
extends beyond your bedroom door. Many
cities and states have so-called Peeping Tom
laws that could penalize your neighbor for
not keeping her
rather attempt a compromise, give your con-
do manager a time when your girlfriend
won't sunbathe—before noon, say, or after
six P.M.—and ask him or her to pass it on.
That way your neighbor can trim her tree
without being overcome with indignation. If
all else fails, build a higher fence.
IM, wife loves to have her nipples fon-
dled. She can't get enough of my licking,
massaging and pinching. She even likes
having them buzzed with a vibrator. I'd
like ю give her a new nipple thrill, but
Гуе run out of ideas.—J.H., Worcester,
Massachusetts.
How about nipple clamps? Once confined
to the world of SEM, these titillating devices
have gone mainstream in the past few years.
They resemble alligator clips but now have
vinyl-coated tips so they pinch but don’t bite.
The best clamps are also adjustable so you
can regulate the pressure. One model even
attaches to a vibrator. When Good Vibra-
tions, the San Francisco sex boutique, began
carrying nipple clamps, they flew out the
door, says owner Cathy Winks, who co-wrote
“The Good Vibrations Guide io Sex.” She
advises positioning them behind the tips of
the nipples so they stay on comfortably.
Ё just bought a subwoofer to enhance
the bass response of my stereo. 1 asked
two salesmen about where to place it.
One suggested a corner, the other said
that that would make the sound boomy.
What do you recommend?—T.G., Chi-
cago, Illinois.
Despite what you've heard, the best loca-
tion may be the corner behind your favorite
chair. ү the bass sounds boomy, tune the lev-
el on your subwoofer You can also move the
box away from the wall or out of the corner
in small measures until the sound approach-
es the smooth, deep bass you're after.
They say that clothes make the man,
but are women influenced by the car
you're driving when you make that cru-
cial first impression? One of my friends
drives a station wagon but still seems to
have a lot of dates, while my new BMW
hasn't changed my love life much at all.
Should I trade it in for a Pinto?—PE.,
Austin, Texas.
Keep the BMW. In a recent survey of 708
Americans, three times as many women as
men said they had accepted or declined a
date because of the car the other person
drove (though that amounted to just 7.5 per-
cent of the total number of women surveyed).
A University of Michigan study of the sex
habits of 10,000 people in 37 cultures of-
fered some clues as to why: Researchers con-
cluded that while men are more likely to con-
sider a woman's. physical features, women
are more interested in whether the guy is go-
ing places. An expensive car says he is, and
that he can take her along. What nobody has
asked is how many of the women who chose
their men by their wheels go out on a second
date. Rather than bringing out the garage
trophy, we prefer to rely on our charisma and
charm to handle the curves.
МУ college roommate has a habit of
masturbating in his bed on the bottom
bunk when he thinks I'm asleep, and the
shaking drives me crazy. 1 can't really tell
him to stop without humiliating him,
and I have tried jokingly to tell him to
use the bathroom, with no results. How
can I get him to take his habit to a p:
vate place without embarrassing him?—
B.M., College Station, Texas.
Where do you masturbate? Suggest he go
there. As you've discovered, college life pre-
sents а challenge for students and their sexu-
ality. Privacy is at a premium. Take ри
Your roommate would prefer not to have to
masturbate with you in the room, but his op-
tions are limited if you don’t keep regular
hours and he has trouble guessing when you
might burst in. Better to know where you are,
keep the shaking to a minimum and take the
chance that you'll be awake and annoyed.
Let him know when you're going to be gone
for any extended period so that he can use
the time for some private moments. Whether
they involve masturbation isn't any of your
business, unless he's using your socks. In re-
turn, you can ask him to provide the same
courtesy for you. Sharing space involves
knowing more about a persons habits than
you want to. If that's а problem, find а room-
mate who enjoys a hot shower before he hits
the sach.
И was caught speeding on my motorcy-
cle by a cop who used a handheld radar
gun, I wonder how reliable a radar gun
is on a bike's smaller size and moving
parts. Can I make the case that the gun
wasn't accurate because I was on а Наг-
ley?—T.A., Los Angeles, California.
Not unless you get a judge who belongs to
Hell’s Angels or cruises the coast on week-
ends. The courts have seen so many speeding
cases based on radar readings that judges
aren't usually receptive to argumentis about
technological snafus. And the smaller size of
your bike won't keep an officer from getting
an accurate reading—he aims at your li-
cense plate or some other fixed, reflective sur-
face. Your case may depend on how much
traffic there was when you were pulled over.
Unlike newer speed guns that use pinpoint
lasers, the traditional micrawave radar
sends out a cone-shaped beam as wide as
1000 feet—enough to cover an entire high-
way. Once the trooper gets a reading, he may
have to make his best guess as to which
speeder was the most guilty (who drives un-
der the limit апутоге?). If you were alone an
the road, your chances of fighting the radar
reading successfully are practically nil.
Im a 23-year-old soon-to-be college
g
graduate. For someone my age, 1 have
an extensive and excellent credit history.
But my girlfriend does not. I plan to
marry her soon, but I am worried: Will
our marriage affect my credit rating?—
H.A., Iowa City, Iowa.
Only if you buy a house or car together or
consolidate your credit cards and other debts.
When a bank or other lender considers a
joint application, it will factor in your wife's
rating and determine how much of a risk you
are as a coule. Credit card companies will
be even more cautious. It may be simpler for
each of you to maintain your own credit
cards, both for bookkeeping (no bickering
over unexplained purchases) and for conve-
nience (you can earn frequent füer miles on
more than one airline). Shared cards can al-
so be dangerous should the relationship turn
ugly: No matter what a judge rules about
who's responsible for which debts, a joint ac-
count means you're legally responsible for
half of whatever your wife buys with the
card—even after you split.
AA few weeks ago, I met a blind man at
a party. We hit it off and have been out
twice now, and I look forward to sleep-
ing with him. But I’m curious about
whether someone who has been blind
since birth experiences sex differently than
a sighted person. Might this man enjoy
different types of stimulation than a man
with sight?—S.S., London, England.
One of the best things about sex is that you
don't have to see what you're doing to enjoy
yourself, or to do it well. Blind people have
the same sexual desires as anyone else—some
kinky, some vanilla—and we hope many
have learned а thing or two over the yea
perusing the Braille version of the “Advisor.
Still, fanciful theories abound about how
blind people must be masterful with their
hands during sex and less judgmental be-
cause they make love to a mental vision of
their pariner. Uh . . . right. Remember that
the next time you dale a blind person who's
lousy im bed. Jim Geoghan, whose play
“Light Sensitive” revolves around an ex-cab-
bie who loses his sight, has said that while re-
searching the character; he “found blind men
to be much more horny than anyone Ud ever
met, I put together my own ten-cent theory,
which is that sighted people gratify them-
selves visually all day long in bits and pieces.
You look, you look, you like, you look. But
blind people don't get to do that.” Actually,
they do, in their own way: Geoghan said his
blind male friends would ask him to describe
in explicit detail the women they met.
All reasonable questions—from fashion,
food and drink, stereo and sports cars to dat-
ing problems, taste and etiquette—will be
personally answered if the writer includes a
stamped, self-addressed envelope. Send all
letters to The Playboy Advisor, PLAYBOY, 680
North Lake Shore Drive, Chicago, Illinois
60611. (E-mail: advisor@playboy.com.)
The most provocative, pertinent queries will
be presented in these pages each month.
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NATIONAL VETERANS LEGAL SERVICES PROGRAM PHOTOGRAPHER: Matthew Borkcski
PLAYBOY
THE MYTH OF
1
bosses
Ro
FORUM
IS
laws ond lawsuits can never eliminate bad judgment
In The Death of Common Sense, au-
thor Philip Howard makes an astute
observation: For the past 50 years,
various regulatory agencies have
tried to create a completely safe soci-
ety. Officials at the FDA, EPA, CPSC,
OSHA and countless other alphabet
agencies have covered every contin-
gency, every possible accident the hu-
man (or at least bureaucratic) mind
can imagine. “Our regulatory system
has become an instruction manual,”
Howard writes. “In the decades since
‘World War Two we have constructed
a system of regulatory law that basi-
cally outlaws common sense. The
motives were logical enough:
Specific legal mandates would
keep government in close
check and provide crisp
guidelines for private citizens.
Butit doesn't work. Human ac-
tivity can't be regulated without
judgment by humans.”
People—some 45,000 a year—
still die from accidents. They
drown in bathtubs, buckets,
swimming pools and toilets.
They choke on food. They run
into things while riding bicycles.
They fall from stairs, ladders,
bridges and balconies. They elec-
trocute themselves.
For years we have responded
to such deaths with a flurry of new
regulations. At one point, says
Howard, there were 140 regulations
dealing with wooden ladders. (Did
any say the obvious: “Don't walk un-
der one”?)
The Contract With America crowd
has pushed through legislation call-
ing for a moratorium on new regu-
lation, a reconsideration of existing
regulation and a call to examine safe-
ty from a cost-benefit perspective. It
has also called for tort reform and
caps on liability lawsuits. This crusade
appeals to the libertarian impulse to
get government off our backs.
Let’s look at one regulatory agency
in particular. The Consumer Product
Safety Commission has fewer than
500 employees and a budget of $41
million. Established in 1972, the
CPSC has jurisdiction over any prod-
uct sold for home use. It can recall,
order the redesign of or ban any
product that it considers dangerous.
Its job is “to protect the public against
unreasonable risks of injuries and
deaths associated with consumer prod-
ucts.” The commission has brought
us fire-retardant children’s dothing,
lead-free crayons, safer bunk beds.
Five years ago the CPSC focused on
the ubiquitous five-gallon bucket—
those plastic containers that carry
everything from joint compound to
pickies (approximately 170 million of
the buckets are manufactured annu-
ally. Some folks take them from
construction sites to use around the
house. A Chicago coroner deter-
mined that toddlers could fall into the
buckets and drown. It's а freak
tragedy, but an estimated 40 children
a year die this way.
The CPSC went into action. Its staff
spent 5113 hours and $100,000 in
wages, plus another $20,000 in grants
to outside focus groups, trying to re-
design the pail. Among its sugges-
tions: a grating over the opening; a
cone at the bottom that would keep a
toddler's head out of liquid; a plug
that could be removed after the buck-
et was emptied; buckets that would
deteriorate in sunlight, or finally, a
bucket with a round bottom that
would tip over when a child climbed
into it.
The manufacturers of the buckets,
finding themselves in the spotlight,
spent some $500,000 in legal and
lobbying fees to keep one step ahead
of the commission. In February,
the CPSC gave up on redesigning the
bucket. Instead, it recommended
posting warning stickers on the buck-
ets, detailing in both English and
Spanish the hazard to toddlers.
‘The industry complied.
Congress had a field day with
the bucket fiasco—with some mem-
bers charging (incorrectly) that the
commission had considered order-
ing that the buckets have holes
punched in them. “Why on earth
would you want a bucket with a
hole in the bottom of it?” asked
one incredulous congressman.
The Contract With America
anti-regulatory crusade casts
the debate in terms of cost.
Should the businessman pay
for every wild-assed or well-
intentioned idea that comes
from Washington? There
are plenty of people willing
to siphon off profits in the
name of the common good.
But cost obscures the de-
bate, just as blaming the buck-
et misses the real problem. Many of
the drownings were actually the re-
sult of inattention on the part of par-
ents or day care providers. One of the
commissioners at the CPSC looked at
119 reports and found “60 percent
were cases that could be termed child
abuse, neglect or potential foul play.
A number of the children had been
previously in foster care because of
negligence and insufficient parental
supervision.”
‘Trying to manufacture thoughtful-
ness, trying to put safety into bucket
design, was a noble cause but one
doomed to fail. You cannot replace
human judgment or protect against
the lack of it.
Al
42
In addition to reining in regula-
tors, the Contract With America seeks
to cap settlements in liability lawsuits.
Consumer rights activists and ambu-
lance chasers contend that court cases
are an important way to police indus-
try, that big settlements send a mes-
sage. Do away with regulation and
lawsuits become the only way to force
change. But they suffer the same
flaws as regulation: They shift blame,
reward stupidity and make safety the
responsibility of the machine, not the
operator.
Collin Johnson was riding a bicycle
home from work after midnight. Al-
though his bike was equipped with
reflectors, ithad no headlight. Believ-
ing he was visible to traffic, Johnson
whizzed down a hill at 20 to 40 miles
per hour. An oncoming Jeep made a
left turn in front of him. Johnson
woke up partially paralyzed. He
found a lawyer who, with the help
of a self-proclaimed bike expert, tes-
tified that reflectors weren't enough,
that the company, Derby, should have
installed a headlight as standard
equipment on every bike it sold, that
the CPSC standards were themselves
dangerous because they gave the im-
pression that reflectors were suffi-
cient to prevent accidents. The jury
bought the argument and awarded
Johnson $7 million (later negotiated
down to $3.25 million).
Ask yourself: Will this multimillion-
dollar message reach more bike rid-
ers than the one in their owner's
manual? That warning reads: “At
night, always use a working headlight
and taillight. Always wear reflective,
light-colored clothing and a reflective
stripe on your helmet.” That seems
straightforward enough.
The expert witness was a one-man
regulatory agency intent on making
headlamps mandatory. Не һай once
sued the CPSC for not expanding its
reflector policy to include headlights.
He lost. He now wages his crusade on
the Internet. “In many nighttime ac-
cident situations, motorists can't see
reflectors,” he said. “But they can al-
ways see headlamps.”
Unfortunately, he is wrong.
By his estimate, headlights might
prevent only 79 percent of nighttime
collisions between bikes and cars.
The law requires that all motorcy-
des come equipped with headlights.
Engineers have rigged it so you can't
ride a motorcyde without the light
on. Motorcydes are larger, louder
and more illuminated than bikes, yet
thousands of motorcyclists are struck
by drivers (day and night) who did
not see the headlight.
For that matter, hundreds of peo-
ple are killed crossing railroad tracks
at night, and locomotives have terrific
headlights. Yes, headlights might save
some lives. New Jersey law requires
you to have a headlight on your bike.
Whose responsibility is it to follow the
law? Johnson chose not to install a
light, even though he knew he would
be riding at night.
To argue that Derby was responsi-
ble (because it was rich and Johnson
was not) creates a double standard:
Only the wealthy are responsible.
It’s a point that got lost in the head-
lines. Many state laws hold that chil-
dren in automobiles must be belted
into a car seat. The law does not re-
quire Detroit to put a car seat into
every car it makes on the off chance
that a child may ride in that саг.
What the safety saviors don't un-
derstand is that no rule, no single
piece of equipment, will ever protect
you from the concerted stupidity of
others or the stupidity you sometimes
inflict on yourself.
When laws and lawsuits dismiss
personal responsibility or shift blame
to the deepest pocket, we create an
absurd and unsafe world.
WHAT SORT OF JUDGE READS PLAYBOY?
We know Clarence Thomas
reads PLAYBOY (he once wrote a
letter to the editor about an arti-
cle on Reagan and race). But now,
we can add to the list of
those in power who read
our magazine for the arti-
cles the names of William
Rehnquist, Antonin
Scalia, John Paul
Stevens, Stephen
Breyer, Anthony
Kennedy, Sandra
Day O'Connor,
Ruth Bader Gins-
burg and David
Souter—collectively known as the
U.S. Supreme Court.
Well, ifnot the entire magazine,
perhaps just The Playboy Forum. It
seems that John Wesley Hall Jr.,
an attorney from Arkansas, was
attempting to persuade the
Supreme Court to consider mak-
ing the “knock and announce”
rule of common law part of the
Fourth Amendment.
In his brief he wrote: “We agree
that the element of surprise in
some searches can be imperative
if—and this is a big ifthe police
can show a valid reason to over-
come the privacy and property
interests of the householder they
intend to invade with battering
rams, guns drawn and cocked
and stun grenades. The element
of surprise, however, is subject to
great abuse and is a greater dan-
ger to citizens and police. The
anecdotal evidence is
mounting. The Decem-
ber 1994 PLAYBOY, on
newsstands the weck this
reply bricf is filed, pro-
vides a parade of citizens
and police shot and
killed or seriously
wounded during raids
by overzealous officers.”
i Attached to the brief
was a copy of James Bo-
vard’s Playboy Forum article
“Oops—You're Dead: The Body
Count From No-Knock Raids Is
Climbing. Are You Next?”
‘The Court granted certiorari.
Oral arguments were heard on
March 28, 1995. The final ruling
was expected by June.
N E W
SFR
O N T
what's happening in the sexual and social arenas
AD PATROL
CROWN POINT, INDIANA—Many athletic
teams support themselves through spon-
sors, and now police want to explore this
Source of revenue. The top cop in Crown
Point is offering to sell space on the backs
of police cars—at the rate of $1600 а car.
“We thought it would be a good idea to pay
fer light bars, siren boxes, radios and
things of that nature,” said Police Chief
Michael Valsi. Wait until Dunkin’ Donuts
hears about this.
AKISS 1S JUSTA KISS
WASHINGTON, D.c—Let’s hear it for
long wet ones. Scientists have long main-
tained that kissing does not spread AIDS,
but now they are closer to knowing why.
Researchers have found that saliva con-
tains proteins (called secretory leukocyte
protease inhibitors) that attach themselves
to white blood cells and protect them from
infection. Another set of proteins (called
mucins) cause the human immunodeficien-
cy virus to clump together. The biomech-
anism remains to be identified, but it raises.
the possibility of developing new treatments
or a vaccine.
THE OTHER CHEEK
TROY, OHIO—A 33-year-old father who
bruised his ten-year-old son with a hard
spanking accepted a novel plea bargain to
avoid prosecution for domestic violence.
The court dismissed the charge when the
father agreed to leta police officer give him
three licks with the same paddle he had
used on his son. The paddle, inscribed
BOARD OF EDUCATION, was subsequently
destroyed.
HIPPOCRATIC OAFS
JACKSON, MISSISSIPPI—Giving a penile
implant to а convicted child molester was
not hailed as progressive medicine by a
Mississippi congressman. Representative
Sonny Montgomery learned that a Novy
veteran afflicted with impotence obtained
the implant at taxpayer expense after seru-
ing four years in prison for sexual acts
with two girls. Montgomery wants Veter-
ans Administration hospitals to start
Screening their patients.
BLUENOSE STOCKS
‘TUPELO, MISSISSIPPI—Not long ago a
‚financial genius established a mutual fund
billed as virtually recession-proof because
it invests in i ies associated with sin,
human weakness and popular bad habits.
Now comes the Timothy Plan, a no-load
mutual fund for “Christian investors” who
want to put their money where their morals
are. That means no investments are made
in corporations involved with abortion,
pornography, alcohol, tobacco or casino
gambling. No connection is indicated, but
the original Timothy was а Christian disci-
ple and missionary activist who, legend has
it, was sainted after being stoned to death.
SAY WHEN
LONDON—Three men who were among
a group of S&M enthusiasts found guilty
of assault during a 1990 trial are again
appealing their conviction on grounds that
the consensual nature of the acts afforded
them the right to privacy. In initial ap-
peals, Britain's House of Lords upheld the
original conviction, stating that consent to
sadomasochistic acts is no defense for as-
Sault that causes bodily harm.
TOUGH EXAMS
ANKARA—The Turkish government is
backing down on a rule that authorizes
virginity tests for female students and те-
quires the expulsion of any found to be
"unchaste." Afier an outcry from human
rights advocates, national education offi-
cials said they would modify the order “to
prevent mäsinterpretations.”
CLINIC SUITS
PENSACOLA, FLORIDA—A wrongful-
death suit has been filed against а Pen-
sacola abortion clinic by the family of
David Gunn, в doctor shot and killed there
by a pro-lifer in 1993. The suit claims the
clinic should have recognized the danger
presented by fanatic protesters and that it
failed to accord protection to employees
lawfully on its premises. Meanwhile, anti-
abortionists are suing to nullify the eight-
foot buffer zone around the clinic, which
was created by the Pensacola city council.
Officials established the protected area af-
ter Paul Hill killed a doctor and his secu-
rity escort outside the clinic a few months
after Gunn's murder. Abortion opponents
claim the zone violates the Freedom of Ac-
cess to Clinic Entrances law, and hinders
their First Amendment right to speak
against abortion and distribute literature.
WATER BABIES
WASHINGTON, D.c—Is that seasickness,
or are you pregnant? Navy Secretary John
Dalton rejected a proposal that would re-
quire Waves to take a pregnancy test before
they are assigned sea duty. He advised his
base and fleet commanders that having a
baby "is a natural event” not incompatible
with a naval career.
43
TRICKS
You made some good hits in
“Stupid Government Tricks”
and “The Contract on America”
(The Playboy Forum, April). The
1994 crime bill made dozens of
additional crimes punishable by
death, but at what cost? Last
year the U.S. had more than
3000 people on death row, but
only 31 were executed. The
others spent their time exhaust-
ing resources and man-hours
on legal appeals paid for by tax-
payers. A Duke University
study shows it costs $2.2 million
more to execute a killer than to
lock him away for life simply be-
cause lawyers cost more than
prison guards. Every $2 million
spent injecting lethal drugs into
some lawless punk is money
that can’t be spent on efforts
which even law enforcement
authorities regard as more ef-
fective: more cops on the beat,
more programs to fight drug
abuse, longer prison terms. Un-
cle Sam should apply a little
federal scrutiny where it could
really do some good—toward
budgetary priorities.
Nick Johnson
Chicago, Illinois
April, the month when mil-
lions of procrastinators come
face-to-face with their tax mas-
ters in Washington, becomes all the
more frustrating when we survey the
wasteland of our federal government.
With more than 600,000 members na-
tionwide, Citizens Against Government
Waste has been working for more than
adecade to make government more ас-
countable. Our 1995 Congressional Pig
Book Summary profiles 88 of the most
egregious pork-barrel projects in the
country. These projects, worth $1 bil-
lion, represent only a fraction of the
$10 billion in procedural pork that we
found larding up appropriations bills.
Among this year's:
*$15 million for a footbridge from
New Jersey to Ellis Island.
*А $19.6 million annual, unautho-
rized gift to the International Fund for
Ireland. In the past, the money has
been used to produce golf videos and
to subsidize pony-trekking centers.
+$110 million for a single highway
project in West Virginia, which is the
E R
FOR THE RECORD
PiUc Рик
“It got pretty tiring, and I have better things
to do. There are so many educated people on
the Internet—and what are they interested in?
Stupid pictures that they could see better if they
bought a copy of PLAYBOY.”
COMPUTER RESEARCHER PATRICK GROENEVELD,
AFTER PULLING THE PLUG ON THE UNIVERSITY
OF DELFTS PORNOGRAPHY ARCHIVE IN THE
NETHERLANDS, AN INTERNET SITE THAT RACKED
UP SOME 50,000 DOWNLOADED IMAGES A DAY
state of pork paragon Senator Rob-
ert Byrd.
Ofcourse, pork makes up only a part
of the waste. In the interest of present-
ing taxpayers with a wider range of op-
tions, CAGW's 1995 edition of Prime
Cuts catalogs hundreds of unimple-
mented waste-cutting proposals dating
back to the 1984 Grace Commission.
While the 104th Congress seems more
likely to take action than any other
Congress in memory, nothing will
move the process along faster than citi-
zen involvement. Let's insist that the
government live within its means.
"Thomas Schatz
President
Citizens Against Government Waste
Washington, D.C.
("Congressional Pig Book Summary” and
“Prime Cuts” are available from Citizens
Against Government Waste, Dept. Р 1301
Connecticut Ave. NW, Suite 400, Washing-
ton, D.C. 20036.)
CONTRACT ON AMERICA
I am thoroughly disappoint-
ed with the headline “The Con-
tract on America.” The proper
term is Contract With America.
No matter what PLAYBOY's polit-
ical affiliations and beliefs are, I
think it’s unbecoming of you to
advocate a childish misnaming
of an important (albeit unoffi-
cial) document. Many fresh-
man representatives beat their
senior opponents in the last
congressional election because
of that contract. Let Bob Wie-
der use wit and facts to support.
his argument. Don't destroy
your credibility by sleight of
meaning.
Sean Sherwin
Casper, Wyoming.
What's this? You want to deify an
agenda? It’s the Constitution we
support, not Newt's master plan.
In early March, New York
brought back the death penalty.
There were no public hearings.
Мо experts were called to elab-
orate on the details of the bill.
Even floor debate was limited.
This was not an effort toward
genuine or legitimate crime
control. Just like last year’s ab-
surd congressional cnactment
of the largest expansion of cap-
ital punishment in U.S. history,
the unspoken agenda in New
York was about polities, not policy. The
death penalty debate isn't about effec-
tiveness or efficiency. Virtually every-
one concedes that executions cost mil-
lions of dollars and have no impact on
crime. We've given up the pretense of
fairness since the Supreme Court an-
nounced that racism in death sentenc-
ing is inevitable. Similarly, the Court
has dispensed with concern about er-
ror by announcing that the Constitu-
tion doesn’t protect innocent people
from being put to death. What law-
makers are concerned about is the
death penalty’s impact on elections. It's
a shame that the losers in the game
aren't just the politicians, and they don't
just lose their jobs. The real losers in the
death penalty charade lose their lives.
Leigh Dingerson
Executive Director
National Coalition to Abolish
the Death Penalty
Washington, D.C.
FATHERHOOD
Thank you for Ted Fishman's article
“Redefining Fatherhood” (The Playboy
Forum, March). It's about time someone
stood up for men’s rights. Women have
hundreds of political and civil rights
organizations to look out for their in-
terests. Because it is politically incor-
rect to dispute a woman's right to par-
enthood, the organizations that help
men receive little or no attention from
politicians or the media. An organiza-
tion I would recommend to any man
fighting for his rights is the National
Center for Men, РО. Box 555, Old
Bethpage, New York 11804. Please in-
form your readers. Men need all the
help they can get.
Scott Wilkens
Pontiac, Michigan
I hope Ted Fishman's article receives
the attention it deserves. In a society
that continues to favor women in child
custody disputes, we should be out-
raged that so many children are victim-
ized in the name of good intentions.
Loving, devoted, presumably compe-
tent dads are having their children
stolen from them through deception
and procrastination. With their emo-
tional and financial resources spent
(апа invaluable moments participating
in their children’s lives lost forever),
many of these men are frustrated, sad,
angry, poor—and childless. At a time
when stories about deadbeat fathers
and abusive relationships make head-
lines, the media would do well to high-
light the good guys whose only crime
might have been not knowing the
answer to “Do you know where your
children are?"
Nancy Chaney
Moscow, Idaho
UNCLE SCAM
Perhaps I've been in law school too
long, but I found James Bovard's аг-
tide “Uncle Scam Wants You” (The
Playboy Forum, March) so full of hyper-
bole, unsubstantiated facts and emo-
tional rhetoric as to border on propa-
ganda. No law enforcement agency in
this country promotes what Bovard
calls “abusive entrapment schemes.” In
fact, the criminal justice system has
many self-imposed hurdles that are
specifically designed to deter such un-
lawful practices. I would welcome an
intelligent debate of the real issues re-
garding entrapment. Unfortunately,
none was presented. PLAYBOY should
stick with the kind of cerebral disputa-
tion found in your February Forum arti-
cle “Defending Pornography.”
Joseph Gallo
Waco, Texas
I think James Bovard is forgetting
how many drug rings are brought
down by government stings. Sure,
many of the tactics seem unethical to
the innocent citizen, but what about
drug pushers and dealers who slip
through the fingers of the justice sys-
tem because of minor technicalities? 1
say we tighten the loopholes in the
courts and hang the animals on the
streets and in our schools.
Louis Hayes
Urbana, Illinois
Hooray for “Uncle Scam.” The gov-
ernment works in unscrupulous ways
for the sake of a bust. Here’s a nomina-
tion for the Drug Enforcement Admin-
istration’s Bloopers Hall of Fame: A
suit by a group of airline passengers
and workers aboard a Belize Air Inter-
national flight charges that they were
MINIMUM
SECURITY
PRISON
А. average of 1250 people began serving mandatory minimum prison
_ sentences each week in the U.S. in 1993. That translates to 179 people per day,
seven people every hour. This future-shock landscape was contributed by former
inmate Marshall Randall, who used to make his living drawing political cartoons.
imprisoned and tortured in Honduras
in 1991 as а result of a botched drug
sting conducted by DEA officials. Ac-
cording to the suit, zealous DEA agents
hid 48 kilos of cocaine on a flight from
Miami to Central America. In their
haste to track and capture drug smug-
glers, the agents failed to inform the
Honduran government, the passengers
or the crew, The six plaintifis said they
were imprisoned and tortured for 11
days before U.S. officials would secure
their release. The officials apologized
to the Honduran government, but
those participating in the suit wanted
more—at least $350,000 each.
Terry Kent
Miami, Florida
In March, а federal judge in Miami
awarded $155,000 to each plaintiff:
We would like to hear your point of
view. Send questions, information, opinions
and quirky stuff to: The Playboy Forum
Reader Response, PLAYBOY, 680 North
Lake Shore Drive, Chicago, Illinois 60611.
Please include a daytime phone number.
Fax number: 312-951-2939. E-mail:
forum@playboy.com.
45
46
7
+y
>
It's only a matter of time. With Newt
Gingrich pushing for a laptop in every
poor child’s schoolbag, an Internet
server in every area code and afford-
able access for all, cyberspace is
finished. The virtue vigilantes have
asked the obvious: Before we turn our
kids loose in this digital playground,
shouldn't we clean up the garbage,
chase the dirty old men out of town
and find a way to eliminate erotic
images?
Will they succeed? Probably. The on-
ly question is how.
Yes, yes. We are aware of that little
obstacle known as the First Amend-
ment. The Internet—as anyone who
received a computer for Christmas has
undoubtedly discovered—is anarchic.
There is no act too obscene (or too bor-
ing) that a million geeks can't find time
to discuss it in chat groups for days.
People who have now experienced un-
bridled First Amendment freedom via
cyberspace will resist any efforts to curb
its unfettered discourse. Part of their
cockiness comes from the technology.
As Internet pioneer John Gilmore has
said: “The Net interprets censorship as
damage and routes around it”
Let's hope that’s the case: The cyber-
prudes come in all shapes and sizes. At
the very top, Senator James (“I want to
keep the information superhighway
from resembling a red-light district”)
Exon introduced legislation (the Com-
munications Decency Act of 1995) to
expand FCC regulations covering ob-
scene telephone calls to include all
forms of electronic communication.
Anyone who “makes, transmits or oth-
erwise makes available any comment,
request, suggestion, proposal, image or
other communication” that is “obscene,
lewd, lascivious, filthy or indecent” us-
ing a “telecommunications device" will
be subject to a fine of $100,000 or two
years in prison.
Most people view censorship as the
silencing of one voice ata time. Senator
Exon's tactic goes for the middleman.
Make carriers responsible for the con-
tent of the Net, and providers will
monitor every online conversation.
Perhaps they will use what is known
"TARGET:
forget it—the net is doomed
as George Carlin software—programs
that bleep out offensive or potentially
sexy words. Nervous sysops may have
to spend their days and nights
hunched over the bully button ready to
spank anyone who brings offensive lan-
guage to a chat group. Postal inspec-
tors could find (or plant) provocative
images and collect big bucks from bul-
letin board operators who take the bait
or who simply fall asleep instead of
policing their corner of cyberspace.
If that law were to go into effect, cy-
berspace would become about as titil-
lating as the local mall. Hot and heavy
e-mail would all but cease. Erotic image
banks would be even harder to find.
Altsex.stories would evoke nostalgia
similar to wildly
embellished ac-
counts of Wood-
stock. You could
probably still ac-
cess stock quotes
and weather re-
ports from Com-
puserve, or find
kindred spirits to
discuss the relative
merits of Picard
and Kirk, but only
if everyone kept
their virtual pants
zipped up.
The knights of
the Internet like
to claim that their
universe is beyond
the reach of prudes. They have con-
vinced themselves that the Net is a
realm of fantasy, a universe that exists
parallel to the real world rather than
within и. Forget it. The Internet is
about as private as a postcard,
The technology already does exist to
document and disclose your personal
obsessions, or your simple curiosities.
The same technology can allow anyone
to see your address book—with whom.
you communicate, how often and for
how long.
In one sense, the Internet is like the
Trojan horse: a neat toy until you look
inside. The Harvard Crimson discov-
ered, for instance, that anyone on the
-YBERSPACE
© == By JAMES В. PETERSEN
Harvard computer network could look
at logs of users’ actions. In short, they
could find out exactly how many im-
ages from Debbie Does a Donkey, Hu-
manoid Hunks From San Francisco or
Young Lolitas you had downloaded. The
Crimson reported (without naming
names) that 28 students had down-
loaded some 500 pornographic pic-
tures in one week. Patrick Groeneveld,
the sysop who ran the Digital Pictures
Archive at the University of Delfi in the
Netherlands, kept a log of the top 50
consumers of erotica and then publi-
cized the list. It included the addresses
of several major corporations (AT&T,
Citicorp and Ford, among others). Try
explaining your collection of computer
cuties to the personnel department.
When the do-gooders arrive in
force—and they certainly will—they'll
bring some obvious, fairly old-fash-
ioned tools: outrage, parental concern
and hypocrisy. They'll target schools
and colleges first because that's where
the “children” are and because most
universities have ties to the govern-
ment. Sadly, most colleges place repu-
tation above academic freedom. We're
not sure what the outcome of the Har-
vard fiasco will be, but when a techie
pointed out to authorities at Carnegie
Mellon University what was available
on the Net, CMU tried to shut down all
sex-related chat groups. Our guess is
that prestigious universities such as
Harvard and Carnegie Mellon will be-
come the first and most vigilant censors
of cyberspace. After all, boys and girls,
they're their computers.
There seems to be no end to the self-
appointed protectors of the innocent.
Look at what happened to Jake Baker.
By now you're probably familiar with
the story: A University of Michigan
alumnus with nothing to do sits in
a hotel room in Moscow, cruising the
Net. Acting on a tip from the teenage
daughter of a friend, he flips through
alt.sex.stories, where he finds a bunch
of sordid torture fantasies posted by
kiasyd@umich.edu (Jake Baker).
Thinking that such filth and depravity
reflect poorly on his alma mater
(whereas his own cruising was for no-
ble reasons having nothing to do with
sex or simple curiosity), the man
notifies the university. Before you
know it, Jake Baker finds himself in
jail. Internet junkies say Baker fucked
up by using his real name and the
name of his school—oh, and by the
way, by giving the victim in a story
the name of a woman in one of his
classes. Baker was an idiot, but what
happened to him shows a typical over-
reaction by the outside world to the
not-so-niceties of the Net.
The University of М
the equivalent of martial law: It or-
dered psychiatric interviews for Baker
(the shrinks thought he had an active
fantasy life but was not a threat), then
moved to suspend him. Never mind
the First Amendment—this was a
health crisis.
Suspension wasn’t enough for the
feds. The government sniffed a test
case and took action. The cops arrived,
looked at Baker's e-mail (with his per-
ission) and arrested him for trans-
g “interstate communication
containing any threat to kidnap any
person or any threat to injure the per-
son of another.” A judge ordered that
Baker be held without bond. The pros-
ecuüon argued that the 20-year-old
student be kept in jail “to prevent rape
and murder.” (He was released after a
month in jail.)
Clearly the judge and the feds were
overwhelmed by the mystique of the
new medium. Robert Ressler, a retired
FBI agent who specializes in the habits
of serial killers, told the press that
while not everyone who has such fan-
tasies is dangerous, “every serial killer
starts with fantasizing.” That backward
logic seems to say that the Net—fed by
fantasy—is a breeding ground for
killers. So everyone who has ever
signed on to altsex.stories should be
held without bond for what they might
do? What's the difference between
words on the Internetand words at the
neighborhood bookstore?
Jake Baker is au-
thor of a grubby
tiule chronicle in
which he and a
friend hold a
woman Captive (ty-
ing her by her hair
to a ceiling fan),
then abuse her
with clamps, glue,
a big spiky hair-
brush, a hot curl-
ing iron, a spread-
er bar, a knife and
finally fire. He
lands in jail.
Bret Easton Ellis
comes up with a
novel, American
Psycho, in which
the protagonist holds a woman captive,
sprays her with Mace, decapitates her
to have sex with her severed head,
nails a dildo to her genitals and drills
holes in various parts of her body, all
while capturing the events on film. El-
lis has a table at Elaine's.
The feds insist Baker's case isn’t a
First Amendment issue. that he made a
direct threat against a specific person.
But their logic doesn't hold up: The
woman's name appears in something
that is clearly a story, written in the pre-
sent tense and including a disclaimer
indicating it is fiction. (Most case law
holds that a threat must imply a future
action.) Baker never showed the story
to the woman or acted in any perverse
fashion toward her, As freaky as the
fiction was, there didn't seem to be any
intent. Just dweeb bravado. Rumor has
it that Baker is still a virgin. (That
could explain everything.)
The evidence against Baker includes
e-mail that he sent to a person in Cana-
da who called himself Arthur Gronda.
Baker and Gronda keystroked cach
other into electronic ecstasy, discussing
torture and kidnapping techniques.
According to the investigating agent,
Baker wrote: "I don't want any blood
in my room, though I have come upon
an excellent method to abduct a bitch.
As I said before, my room is right
across from the girls’ bathroom. Wait
until late at night, grab her when she
goes to unlock the door. Knock her un-
conscious and put her into one of those
portable lockers (forget the word for it)
or even a duffel bag. Then hurry her
out to the car and take her away. What
do you think?"
Good question. Most of you probably
think that the little creep should be
hung upside down by his genitals. But
the evidence is far from damning. In
the e-mail, Baker never named a tar-
get. The woman whose name he ap-
propriated for his macabre alt.sex.sto-
ries fantasy did not live in his dorm.
And talking about a crime is not a
crime. As one lawyer said: “What peo-
ple see isa frightening use of technolo-
gy, So they attack the technology itself.
Tf Baker had written this stuff in letters,
nobody would be saying, 'Let's open all
the U.S. mail.”
Don't give the government any
ideas. Baker faces a five-year prison
sentence. If he's convicted, it will, as
they say, send a message.
Meanwhile, the knights of the Inter-
net insist their world does not need
rules or cybercops. They have their
own ways of punishing bad behavior:
flaming and scorn. Within days of Bak-
er's arrest, stories began to appear on
the Net with characters named Jake
Baker. Drag queens in prison rape the
fantasy Jake and cut out his tongue. A
woman meets the fantasy Jake on the
street, tortures and shoots him. The
devil asks the fantasy Jake to torture
a woman, then masturbate, and when
the fantasy Jake is unable to obtain an
erection, the devil shoves a curling iron
up fantasy Jake's ass.
Fight fire with fire, speech with
speech: Can the government come up
with anything better to keep the Net
avilized?
47
48
Anonymous remailers Often located
in freedom-loving Scandinavia, these
sites allow Internet users (including
pedophiles, government whistle-
blowers and political exiles) to send
e-mail that does not contain a return
address. They are not foolproof,
however, In February, the name of
a poster who used the popular
anon.penet.fi site was turned over to
Finnish authorities following com-
plaints from the Church of Scientol-
ogy. The church pressured police to
serve a search-and-seize warrant after
nameless postings that it claims in-
cluded “re-created versions of sacred
religious scriptures that are protected
by both copyright and trade secret
law.” The remailer owner said he sur-
rendered the poster's identity rather
than reveal his 200-megabyte sub-
seriber list.
Cancel A command
sent by а user to
delete a message
posted to a Usenct
discussion group. In
theory, only the per-
son who writes а mes-
sage can cancel it, but
users long ago discov-
ered ways to forge the
command. Programs
that cast a wider net
(knocking out mes-
sages in more than
one place) are known
as cancelbots. In the
past, cancelbots have
been used mostly to
counter users who
“spam” Usenet by
sending chain letters,
advertisements or political propagan-
da to multiple discussions where they
don't belong. But the programs have
a more ominous use, allowing zealots
to launch search-and-destroy missions
against ideological enemies.
Domain name Part of your address
оп the Internet that indicates where
you are located (еб. playboy.com,
yale.edu, whitehouse.gov). А non-
profit group funded by the National
Science Foundation registers domain
names, each of which must be unique
and, apparently, colorless. A recent
the tools of repression
request by a Net publisher, Justin
Hall, to register fuck.com was denied.
“We're not in the business of censor-
ing names,” a registration official ex-
plained, “but there are undoubtedly
a large number of people who would
be offended.”
George Carlin software The nick-
name coined by Prodigy to describe
the program it uses to delete objec-
tionable words from its members’ pri-
vate mail. Prodigy officials decline to
release a list of the forbidden words,
but certainly it contains the seven that
Carlin rattles off in his famous come-
dy routine: shit, piss, cunt, fuck, cock-
sucker, motherfucker, tits. The soft-
ware allows Prodigy to screen 75,000
messages daily and send each on its
way within minutes. When screened
by humans, the delay could be as long
as 21 hours.
Moderators On popular services such
as America Online, volunteers are ге-
cruited to discourage members from
using language deemed to be “vulgar,
abusive or hateful.” AOL and Prodigy
subscribers—who agree when coming
aboard that they won't use even dis-
guised words such as f**k—quickly
Tesort to more creative antics. Last
fall on AOL, a user typed the word
prick during a discussion, then quick-
ly added “your finger” on the next
line to cover her tracks. Soon after, a
male participant tested the guidelines
with “genitalia” and “asexual.” Both
users were warned; one was evicted.
Most discussions on Usenet, avail-
able via the Internet, are free-for-alls.
Those that do have moderators allow
them to eliminate only repetitive or
irrelevant posts. It’s a fine line. Last
year, for example, a user or users by
the name of Serdar Argic flooded the
discussion group soc.history with mes-
sages arguing, despite overwhelming
evidence otherwise, that Turks had
not massacred Armenians in 1915. A
moderator was chosen, and Argic's
diatribes were filtered out.
Terms of service The document that
many cyberspace users must endorse
before they are allowed to open an ac-
count with a service provider. While
insisting they support freedom of ex-
pression, Everyman services such as
America Online and Prodigy are also
dedicated to preserv-
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wis MEL GIBSON
a candid conversation with hollywood's favorite madman about bad puns, great
fights, the perils of speaking your mind and the joy of grossing out your co-stars
Mel Gibson is sitting in an editing bay in
а small postproduction building in Holly-
wood, watching three compuler monitors, all
of which are running clips from his latest
film, “Braveheart.” Gibson is producing, di
recting and starring in this story of William
Wallace, a 13th century Scottish revolution-
ary who made a hobby of killing Englishmen
and wound up being hanged. drawn and
quartered at the age of 35. It's an epic that
runs nearly three hours and is filled with
bloody battle scenes, a dash of romance and
more than а few of the sorts of glib, throw-
ашау lines that fans of Gibson 's “Mad Max"
and “Lethal Weapon” trilogies have come
to expect.
The editors have put together a promo-
tional clip for Gibson—shots of Mel and co-
star Sophie Marceau, of Mel in battle, of pil-
laging, of rampaging, of just Mel looking
into the camera. “There's too much of me,”
Gibson complains. “It slows it down.” He
wants to take out the close-ups that don't
move the action along. He runs his fingers
through his nearly shoulder-length. un-
washed hair, pulling at it so it stands almost
straight up. He rubs his beard, which is
white around the chin, and sticks a finger in-
to his mouth to massage a tooth. He looks
like a wild man rather than the handsome
“One time I got a bad thrashing I woke up
in the bloody hospital with head stitches, a
busted nose, my jaw off the hook. That's nev-
er going to happen again. If anybody even
looks at me sideways, I'm cracking first.”
romantic lead who so captivated his co-stars
Sigourney Weaver т "The Year of Living
Dangerously,” Diane Keaton т "Mrs. Sof-
fel,” Jodie Foster in “Maverick,” Michelle
Pfeiffer in “Tequila Sunrise,” Sissy Spacck
in “The River,” Goldie Hawn in “Bird ona
Wire” and Jamie Lee Curtis in “Forever
Young.”
“Braveheart” is on's 22nd picture
(not counting Disney’s animated “Pocahon-
tas,” for which he provides the voice of Cap-
tain John Smith). Over the past 18 years he
has played sensitive romantics, tough, no-
nonsense lawmen, glib rogues, con men and
the bewildered son of a slain Danish king.
He has that rare ability to work off actors
such as Danny Glover, Anthony Hopkins,
Kurt Russell and James Garner with the
same enthusiasm and aplomb he has with his
female co-stars. He's also not afraid to tack-
le roles made famous by actors such as Lau-
rence Olivier (“Hamlet”), Garner (“Maver-
ick”) and Clark Gable and Marlon Brando
(“The Bounty”).
Gibson was born on January 3, 1956 in
Peekskill, New York, the sixth child of Hut-
ton and Anne Gibson. His father worked as
a railroad brakeman for the New York Cen-
tral Railroad until 1964, when he slipped
on some oil and fell from a train, severely
“ГИ get kicked around for saying it, but men
and women are not equal. The same way you
and I are not equal. You might be more intel-
ligent or have a bigger dick. Feminists don't
like me and I don't like them."
hurting his back. While awaiting the out-
come of the resultant lawsuit he helped sup-
port his family by appearing on “Jeopardy,”
winning $21,000 in 1968. That same year,
with the Vietnam war threatening the lives of
young American draftees, Hutton Gibson
decided to move his family (which included
ten children, with an eleventh soon to be
adopted) to Australia. Although Hutton
served in World War Two, he was also an
opinionated, religious man who had serious-
ly considered the priesthood. His ultracon-
servative Catholic views were imprinted on
his children, and he has written books
defining his position.
Unlike his father, Mel wasn't a reader. In-
stead, he watched such TV shows as the
“Mickey Mouse Club” and “Captain Kan-
garoo,” and old Steve Reeves gladiator
movies. As a high school student in Australia
he was struck by the “reality and natural
ism" of American films in the Seventies, in-
cluding Sidney Lumet’s “Serpico” and “Dog
Day Afternoon” and Francis Coppola's first
two “Godfather” films. At various times, he
worked part-time in a supermarket, at Ken-
tucky Fried Chicken and as an assistant
juice mixer т an orange juice factory.
After high school he auditioned for the
National Institute of Dramatic Arts in
PHOTOGRAPHY BY MIZUNO
“I was known for being a clown at school. 1
remember my dad said, Just remember,
everybody likes a chum, but nobody pays
him. I've often been tempted lo call him and
say, “Remember how you told me? Yes, they do.”
51
FAL AY EFO TF
52
Sydney afier an older sister filled out an ap-
plication for him. When he was asked why he
wanted to be an actor, he answered, “Гое
been goofing around all my life. I might as
well get paid for it.” While at NIDA he got a
part as a surfer т a low-budget film called
“Summer Cily,” which he didn’t take so seri-
ously as his fencing lessons and the Shake-
speare he was learning. He acted in dozens
of plays, including “Waiting for Godot” and
“Romeo and Juliet,” in which he had the
lead opposite Judy Davis. Off campus, he
was a typical rowdy Aussie—he hung out
at bars as much for the brawls as for the
bourbon.
A шеей after one intense barroom beating,
he auditioned for the part of Max Rockatan-
sky in a futuristic film about a lone warrior
cop and an unsavory motorcycle gang. Di-
rector George Miller saw in the beat-up face
of the young Gibson the hero he was looking
for. Although Gibson had only a minimal
‘amount of dialogue, “Mad Max” brought
him the kind of attention that Clint East-
wood got as the Man With No Name in his
early spaghetti Westerns.
Gibson followed “Mad Max” with a sur-
prisingly sensitive portrayal of a retarded
handyman in “Tim,” based on Colleen Mc-
Cullough’s novel, for which he won the 1979
Australian Film Institute’s Best Actor
award, Two years later he worked with Peter
Weir and George Miller (again), two of Aus-
tralia’s most renowned directors, in films
that firmly established him as both а roman-
tic leading man and the prototype of a new
breed of action-adventure hero. He won a
second Australian Film Institute Best Actor
award for Weir's “Gallipoli,” an antiwar
story of two Australian soldiers sent to fight
in Turkey during World War One. And
Miller’s “The Road Warrior” perfected what
he was attempting in “Mad Max.” The two
films established Gibson as an iniernational
movie star.
Between 1982 and 1985 he played Biff in
Arthur Miller’s “Death of a Salesman” at
the Nimrod Theater in Sydney and made five
pictures back-to-back: “The Year of Living
Dangerously,” “The Bounty,” “The River,”
“Mrs. Soffel” and the third and last of the
Mad Max films, “Mad Max Beyond Thun-
derdome.” He then look some time off to
recharge and came back as а smartass un-
dercover cop in “Lethal Weapon,” his most
commercially successful picture to date. Not
all of his films were hits: “Tequila Sunrise”
did moderate business, and “Bird on a
Wire" and ‘Air America” bombed. His inter-
pretation of “Hamlet” drew rave reviews but
small crowds. In 1992 he appeared in “For-
ever Young,” a schmaltzy romance about a
man who is frozen and comes back to life 50
years later. That film and “Lethal Weapon
3” together grossed more than $200 million.
In 1993 Gibson was named male star of the
year by the National Association of Theater
Oumers. He made his directorial debut with
“The Man Without a Face,” in which he
played a disfigured man with a hidden past.
Gibson is intensely private and has avoid-
ed the media as much as possible. His wit
and sometimes raunchy humor have gotten
him into trouble with feminists and gays,
who have demonstrated against him for re-
marks he claims he made in jest. His sense of
humor leans toward the outrageous—"some-
where between discomfort and just hysterical
laughter,” he says.
Gibson has been married to Robyn Moore,
а former nurse’s aide, for 15 years and has
kept her and their six children (ages 5 to 14)
out of the spotlight. Until recently they made
their home on an 800-acre ranch in Aus-
tralia, but decided to move to California be-
cause, Gibson claims, “they don’t know what
to make of me down there.”
His company, Icon Productions, employs
15 people who actively develop numerous
projects for Gibson to produce, direct and act
т. The recent “Immortal Beloved,” starring
Gary Oldman as Beethoven, was an Icon
production, as were five of Gibson's last six
films (“Hamlet,” “Forever Young,” “The
Man Without a Face,” “Maverick” and
“Braveheart”).
To break through Gibson’s protective wall,
PLAYBOY sent Contributing Editor Lawrence
Grobel (who last interviewed Jean-Claude
It was over something I said
five years ago. Suffice it to
say that Pue been chased by
automobiles doing dangerous
things on the freeway.
Van Damme) to visit with the star at his
offices on the Warner Bros. lot in Burbank.
Grobel's report:
“When I got this assignment I called some
of the actresses who have worked with Mel,
and they all told me the same thing: He’s
handsome, easy to work with and has a
weird sense of humor. In person, Gibson
seemed like а nice, cheery fellow, a one-of-
the-guys type who just happened to appear
in a few big films and became a star who
could command many millions for a couple
months’ work.
“For journalists, Gibson has long been a
challenge, claiming that he wants to keep his
life as private as possible. We arranged to
talk for two hours the first day and two more
the next. We wound up talking for eight
hours over those two days and had another
session after that. He kept saying how much
he disliked being interviewed, but only once
did he ask to go off the record.
“The result is a surprisingly no-holds-
barred conversation with a man who has not
revealed himself in quite this way before.
Gibson is full of controversial opinions and
loves raunchy humor. And despite the fact
that such attitudes can get you into trouble
in these politically correct times, he proved to
be refreshingly fearless.”
PLAYBOY: Here are some of the things
we've heard about you: You can be
weird. Off-the-wall. Irreverent. Unpre-
dictable. Insecure. Fearful. Inarticulate.
GIBSON: All of the above are true. And
that’s not the half of it.
PLAYBOY: You mean we're going to get in-
to some interesting stuff here?
GIBSON: We're all a strange bunch of dif-
ferent and contradictory bits. Im no
closer to explaining who | am than any-
one else is.
PLAYBOY: The director of Maverick and
Lethal Weapon, Richard Donner, has said
that you have a lot of anger and hostility
and that underneath, you're a tough son
of a bitch.
GIBSON: I don’t know. I get pretty dark
sometimes, pretty bleak. But that passes.
I rarely lose my temper anymore.
PLAYBOY: Which means you have lost it in
the past.
GIBSON: You've got to get it out. I used to
just hang on to it and then some little
thing would set it off, which was stupid.
You behave like an asshole when you
lose it, and you feel like an asshole after-
ward, It’s not healthy.
PLAYBOY: Has it angered you over the
years to be accused of promoting vio-
lence with the Lethal Weapon and Mad
Max films?
GIBSON: I'm sorry, I don't go with the ar-
gument there. These things have been
around forever. Just look at the Roman
circus. They used to put people out
there and have wild donkeys dance on
them. Look at some of the Jacobean
tragedies. And Shakespeare’s Hamlet
and Macbeth—these are fairly violent
plays. No one has ever accused them of
being responsible for our social evils.
But, boy, if they're saying that about my
earlier films, they ain't seen nothing yet.
PLAYBOY: In other words, wait until they
see Braveheart?
GIBSON: Oh yeah. It's rough. Some of it's
very hard to watch. One battle is about
20 minutes long—we shot 100,000 feet
of film. Before we shot it I watched every
battle movie I could lay my hands on—
and noticed they all get muddy and
murky, but who cares? [ wanted to show
what it was like to be in the middle of a
13th century slugfest. It was pandemoni-
um. People being whacked by mistake by
their own guys, horses falling on people.
I've got а scene where a horse just flies
over the top of these guys’ heads. Гуе
never seen anything like it on film.
PLAYBOY: What drew you to the story of
William Wallace’s attempt to drive the
British out of Scotland?
GIBSON; I read the script in one sitting.
I thought, Oh Jesus, I'm too old to do
this. I hemmed and hawed and walked
around it, but I just couldn't forget it, it
was so dynamic. Wallace's legend is alive
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Whatis ROGAINE?
FOGANE icpical Soon isa presorigion medicne lor use on he scalp thal is used totreata typeof hair loss in men nd womenknovm as androgenetic
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рас Byeendol | year 4B% of those who continued touse FOGAINE rated these har growth as moderate or better
In women: A chic study of women with hairloss was conducted by doctors n 11 US medical centers. Easedon patet selt ratirgs ofregrowth elter
оне HARE td Des eens re Sem НО ГОО e gn ar ao
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Det tar pir mest еріт ОСАМЕ You orto edi sand elm o yor usual schedule
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Ааа 3 B57 patents A fece n cet coroll tials eto deal erts ange skin), mind con
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In animal studies, minoxidil in much erger amounts than wouldbe absorbed from topical use fon skin) in people. has caused important heart-stracture
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The Upchn Company. Kalamazca М 49001. USA CBS
and well in Scotland. A lot of it is amaz-
ing shit. Whether it’s true or not I don’t
know, but it certainly is colorful. He was
kind of a monster—his main hobby was
killing Englishmen. He just hated them.
He started knocking ‘em off when he
was 27. They caught him, threw him in
jail and tried to starve him to death. He
was in a prison dungeon for two months
without food. He apparently found God
in jail and became very religious. When
they thought he was dead they threw
him out into the moat. А woman found
him and nursed him back to health on
her breast milk.
PLAYBOY: That should make for an inter-
esting scene in the film.
GIBSON: 1 would have liked to have
filmed that, but 16$ not in there. But
what is there is totally uncompromising:
The story is uncompromising, and the
way I filmed it is uncompromising. The
camera is always moving. I didn’t want
anything to stand still. It’s about as sub-
Че as а sledgehammer in your face.
PLAYBOY: Wallace was not only hanged,
but also drawn and quartered. Will that
be shown?
GIBSON; Not graphically. For a character
to be dispatched in such a manner is
pretty hard for an American audience,
which prefers hearts and flowers. Amer-
icans don't like to see something that
isn't a happy, happy. happy ending.
Which is OK. The challenge here was to
actually have someone hanged. drawn
and quartered and still have it be beauti-
ful and uplifting.
PLAYBOY: Your publicist has compared
the film to Ben-Hur. How does that sit
with you?
GIBSON: Не has to—he's being paid. I
have heard it compared to David Lean's
work.
PLAYBOY: Lawrence of Arabia?
GIBSON: You know, it’s that story. History
repeats itself. It's that person who rises
up and is the head of an army that fol-
lows him into hideous places, and he
comes out with something.
PLAYBOY: Wallace of Scotland?
GIBSON: Mad Mac [laughs].
PLAYBOY: How does this one compare
with Hamlet, which you've said was the
hardest thing you'd ever done?
GIBSON: This was harder. И physically
kicked the shit out of me. Mentally, too.
It’s also some of the best acting work I've
ever done because it was totally thrown
away. That's all I had the time and ener-
gy todo.
PLAYBOY: You mean because you were di-
recting and producing as well as acting?
GIBSON: Right. I found that I didn’t in-
dulge myselfat all. It's nice to realize you
don't have to.
PLAYBOY: Do you like wearing so many
different hats?
GIBSON: Yeah. Not so much from a busi-
ness standpoint—I'm somewhat of a fis-
cal imbecile. But there’s a lot of pleasure
in the creative things, and the fact that
you can make them happen.
PLAYBOY: How many projects does your
company, Icon Productions, have in de-
velopment right now?
GIBSON: Quite a few, maybe 16.
PLAYBOY: Do you plan to produce all your
own pictures?
GIBSON: That would be ideal. But I was
sent something from one of the studios
the other day that somebody else is di-
recting and producing. If I like it, ГИ
just take my five bucks and do it.
PLAYBOY: Which is what you did as the
voice of John Smith in Pocahontas.
GIBSON: Yeah. I read something about
Disney having real problems with people
saying it's not historically accurate. I'm
thinking, Historically accurate? My God,
there's a fucking raccoon that talks in
this. What do they want?
PLAYBOY: Did it take much to persuade
you to do it?
GIBSON: Not really, I just felt like it.
There were a couple of songs in which I
yodeled a bit.
PLAYBOY: Did you do it for your kids?
GIBSON: That's basically it.
PLAYBOY Did you get a decent deal?
Robin Williams felt screwed by Disney
afier he did the genie's voice in Aladdin.
GIBSON: They screw everybody. You've
got to know that going in. I'm not going
to quibble about bucks. | never do. I
wouldn't say they screwed me, but I
knew what I was getting into.
PLAYBOY: Does the character look any-
thing like you?
GIBSON: I've seen pictures of him. He's a
bit more angular and younger than I
am. More statuesque. What they do is
put a video camera on you while you're
doing your dialogue. They get your fa-
cial expressions and start playing with
those. They're very clever.
PLAYBOY: You're supposed to be clever as
a mimic and impressionist.
GIBSON: Yeah, I can do anyone.
PLAYBOY. Anthony Hopkins told us he
can, 100.
GIBSON: He's fucking funny. His imita-
tions of voices are really quite wonder-
ful. І can do him, but he doesn't know it.
PLAYBOY: Since you acted together in The
Bounty, he probably does you as well.
GIBSON: | don't know if he deems me
worthy to do.
PLAYBOY: At that time, 11 years ago. he
probably didn't. He said he felt you were
in danger of blowing it unless you start-
ed taking care of yourself Were you
pretty out of control then?
GIBSON: Yeah, I was wacko. We were out
there in the trees, in the middle of a vol-
cano, in the middle of French Polynesia,
with bad food and an endless supply of
alcohol—a bunch of randy young men
going to Club Med. We'd get smashed
and go on the Club Med stage and pull
down our pants.
PLAYBOY: That must have gone over big.
GIBSON: You have to realize that they've
got about 180 bouncers, Polynesian
dudes with shoulders four ax handles
across, who are there to beat the shit out
of you.
PLAYBOY: Wasn't that the time you got in-
to a fight in a bar and they had to shoot
only one side of your face because the
other was badly bruised?
GIBSON: That was it. It was really stupid.
1 have a self-destructive tendency.
PLAYBOY: Did you also get a tattoo on
your ass?
SON: I was going to, then I just said,
“Dumb idea. ГИ never be able to show
my ass again.”
PLAYBOY: What kind of tattoo would you
have gotten?
GIBSON: One of those Polynesian circular
jobs. The guy was going to do it the old-
fashioned way—hammer it in. No elec-
tricity necessary.
My father had told me about some
friends of his on leave during World War
Two who went to Hawaii, got drunk and
got tattooed in the same parlor. They all
got leprosy. I don’t know whether that
was an urban myth, a French Polynesian
myth, an island myth, ога hit-and-myth.
PLAYBOY: We were warned about your
puns. Didn't you get to meet Laurence
г during The Bounty?
GIBSON: I met him, though I did not
have any scenes with him. He did that
Sexy Super Celebrity:
Sandra Taylor
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55
РЕАУВОУ
backhanded compliment thing: very
pleasant, shook hands, “Where are you
from?” I said, “Australia.” He said, “Ah,
colonial.” Just . . . a little thing.
PLAYBOY: He probably would have said
the same thing if you'd said the U.S.
Though drinking and drunken behavior
are perhaps more closely associated with
Australia.
GIBSON: Yeah, it's a whole culture in Aus-
tralia. Drinking is a cultural pastime,
and its required. So you indulge and
imbibe. Misbehaving is fun.
PLAYBOY: Until you're looking at fists in
your face.
GIBSON: Onc time I got a bad thrashing.
I was ata party and three dudes worked
me over severely. I woke up in the
bloody hospital with head stitches, a
busted nose, my jaw off the hook, peeing
blood. I was a fucking mess.
PLAYBOY: Why did they do it?
GIBSON: I just didn’t get on with them. I
didn't even know who they were. I was
having an altercation with one guy who
was not digging me and whom 1 wasn't
digging. Then, you know how you hear
that voice saying, “Hey! What are you
doing?” and all you see are knuckles?
Wall, some guy to my side just hauled off
and cracked me one. Drove me right in-
to the wall, and then he followed up with
three more, bang, bang, bang! My lip
was stuck on my bottom teeth. I spat out
a great big hunk of meat and I could see
my nose growing in front of my eyes. I
got up and said. “What the fuck did you
do that for?” He said, “Sorry about that,
mate.” I thought, Jesus, what an asshole.
So I went for him: I got him with a good
one right in his nose, but I didn't see
much after that. It was lights out. Three
guys on me like fucking crazy.
PLAYBOY: Did you learn anything from
that experience?
GIBSON: That that's never going to hap-
pen to me again. If anybody even looks
at me sideways, I'm cracking first. Just
devastate him—and don't get him once,
get him a few times. Make sure he can't
get up and do anything to me.
PLAYBOY: Wasn't that beating just before
you auditioned for Mad Max?
GIBSON: The audition was a week later. 1
was still a mess.
PLAYBOY: It probably helped you get the
part. Of the three Mad Max films, which
is your favorite?
GIBSON: I like the second one, The Road
Warrior. Is a great film. It sull holds up
because it’s so basic. It was the early Clint
Eastwood principle of the Man With No
Name. Didn't require any dialogue. Let
the film do the talking. It’s about ener-
gy—it didn’t spare anyone: people flying
under wheels, a girl gets it, a dog gets it,
everybody gets it. It was the first Mad
Max but done better The third one
didn't work at all.
PLAYBOY: Do you consider those films vi-
olent or just comical?
56 GIBSON: I laughed with them. They're
straight out of a Chuck Jones cartoon.
The kid with the boomerang that
chopped off people's fingers, 1 thought
that was very funny. It reminded me of
one of those Warner Bros. cartoons.
PLAYBOY: Besides Road Warrior you made
two films that came out in 1981. One,
Gallipoli, was highly praised, and the
other, Attack Force Z, was something
you'd probably like to forget.
GIBSON: Gallipoli was a good film, and
Peter Weir isa great director, like George
Miller. I kicked off my career working
with two of the world’s greatest directors
from home. How come those guys were
there? Of course, at the time I didn't
know who they were, but I realized pret-
ty quickly that they were special. There's
something mystical about the way that
Weir achieves a mood, an ambience,
atmosphere.
PLAYBOY: Was there anything mystical
about Attack Force Z?
GIBSON: That’s where I ate dog and
something else very strange. I did that
one for the money. It was a great six-
month holiday in Taipei.
PLAYBOY: What kind of dog did you eat?
GIBSON: It was a black dog. I asked if
there was any reason it was black and ap-
parently black dogs arc preferred. It was
illegal. It wasn't a puppy, but it wasn't an
old dog, either. And it was delicious.
‘Tasted like rabbit.
PLAYBOY: What was the other strange
thing you ate?
GIBSON: After a rugged night. a guy took
us to a Japanese restaurant that he
owned. He wasa big movie star in Taipei
and he owned restaurants and brothels.
We drank this stuff called Green Bam-
boo Leaf liquor and got absolutely ass-
holed. It was 130 proof, like paint re-
mover, man. The next morning I had a
headache you couldn't believe, so he
took me to this marketplace and got me
a bowl of soup. It was a slightly murky
broth with what looked like the en-
docrine glands and digestive tract of a
small animal, the intact esophagus, liver,
lungs, pancreas, intestines and adrenal
glands. I never knew what it was, but it
was delicious. I ate it all and felt great
afterward. They know something, the
Chinese.
PLAYBOY: Did that experience slow you
down?
GIBSON: Nah, are you kidding? I had a
long career ahead of me. I got in some
law trouble once—got arrested for driv-
ing real drunk. It was a humiliating
experience.
PLAYBOY: This was in Toronto, wasn't it?
When you ran a red light and hit anoth-
er car during the making of Mrs. Sofjel?
GIBSON; Yeah, the police dragged me їп.
‘They put me in the back of their truck. I
couldn't get out. No door handles on the
inside. It was a horrible feeling. I was
kicking the grille. yelling and screaming,
"Let me the fuck out of here, you moth-
erfuckers.” I used every foul name I
could think of. This guy turned around
and looked at me dead calm and said,
"Shut the fuck up or ГИ beat the shir out
of you." He was like 64" and I could see
me getting ту head knocked off. 1 was
deeply upset. Your freedom is gone,
you're in this cage, you can't believe
these guys are dragging you off. I got
fingerprinted.
PLAYBOY: And after they found out who
you were, did you spend the night?
GIBSON: No, they gave me a lift home.
PLAYBOY: What did you think of your co-
star, Diane Keaton?
GIBSON: She was generous and warm,
but I never really got to know her. She
used to ask me to tell her stories between
shots. I told her a really disgusting one
with the horrific title of Shit Blisters. She
sat across the table going, “That's the
most disgusting thing I've ever heard.”
But I think she thought it was funny. It
came to me from someone else, so I
don't know whether it's true or not.
PLAYBOY: Want to tell us the story?
GIBSON: It was a sexual-deviant thing
with people who pushed the envelope as
far as sexual practices went. It's beyond
crapping on glass-top tables or anything
like that. They would get hypodermics
full of shit and pump a few grams un-
der their skin. The real fun happened
a week later for the coming-out party
when these welts would grow and then
fester. That's it ina nutshell. I don’t want
to get into it too much, but apparently
there was a whole cult of people over in
Helsinki or someplace and they used to
indulge in these practices.
PLAYBOY: You sound like you believe this
actually happened.
GIBSON: I don't know—it's feasible. Or
fecesable.
PLAYBOY: Thanks for that, Mel. Let's
move on. What do you think when you
hear about your co-stars, like Keaton or
Sigourney Weaver, calling you one of the
handsomest men they've seen?
GIBSON: Hey, they don't tell me that
stuff!
PLAYBOY: But you read about it all the
time, your good looks, the women who
go nuts over you. How do you handle
the groupies or the personal letters you
must get?
GIBSON: Anything like that you have to
look at with suspicion. Invitations scrib-
bled on napkins or cards—from time to
time that happens, and you might think,
boy, it's everybody's dream. But it's not.
It's scary, Because you don't know who
the hell they are. And before you became
famous that never happened. Also, it
doesn't happen all thg time. They're not
exactly jumping out of the woodwork. It
probably happens to Al Pacino more
than me. I come to work, I go home.
Nothing happens on the freeway, no-
body throws herself in front of my
bumper.
PLAYBOY: But when someone does get
(continued on page 68)
WHAT SORT ОЕ MAN READS PLAYBOY?
The sort who knows that hanging out is one of summer's most productive pastimes. He gets many of
his best ideas when he’s not even looking, particularly when with a spirited companion. He treasures
his leisure, and relies on PLAYBOY as his guide to recreation. One in seven men who play tennis, sail
ог go fishing reads PLAYBOY. In any season, his free time 1$ too precious to waste with anything Y
but the best. PLAYBOY is what keeps him swinging—all year long. (Source: Spring 1994 MRI.
58
MENENDEZ
CONFIDENTIAL
anticipating life
without o.j.? lyle and
erik are headed back to
court for their retrial.
here are all the odd facts,
bizarre characters and
untold stories you need
to appreciate round two—
including, of course,
a cameo by o.j. himself
By ROBERT RAND
THE CASE OF THE MISSING GUNS
n an early March afternoon, Lyle
Menendez drove a buddy along Mul-
holland Drive pointing out the luxu-
rious homes of Jack Nicholson, War-
ren Beatty and Marlon Brando. Seven
months had passed since his wealthy parents,
Jose and Kitty, were shotgunned to death on a
‘quiet Sunday evening in August 1989 in Bever-
ly Hills. And it would be another three years
before then 22-year-old Lyle and his 19-year-
old brother, Erik, would publicly confess to
their killing. Their trial, which dominated
Court TV for months, resulted in a double
hung jury. During the drive along Mulholland,
Lyle casually mentioned that “we dumped two.
shotguns and a pistol down the side there re-
cently.” As his friend squirmed in his seat, Lyle
explained that his parents’ deaths might have
been a Mafia hit and that he and Erik had
bought two shotguns to protect themselves.
But realizing they were the primary suspects,
the brothers decided it might look suspicious
and dumped the guns in the heavily wooded
area. Of course, there had been no Mafia hit
and Lyle was engaging in some odd revisionist
history. What had really happened was this:
ILLUSTRATION BY STASYS EIDRIGEVICIUS
PLAYBOY
The brothers had tossed a pair of
freshly fired shotguns down a steep
canyon the night they killed their par-
ents. Lyle anxiously returned a few
days later hoping to retrieve the
weapons, but scavengers had apparent-
ly already found them.
THE GREAT ESCAPE
Lyle and Erik had chosen a secret
spot for a rendezvous. The special place
was in Greece, high on a cliff over-
looking the Aegean Sea. Lyle told sev-
eral dose friends that they would be
able to contact him there if he ever
disappeared.
“Three months after the Menendez
brothers arrest, sheriff's deputies dis-
covered that some links on the two-foot
chain Lyle wore to and from court
had been partially cut. A strip search
turned up nothing, but a search of
their cells was more productive.
Deputy Robert Birkett reported that
he found “an escape contingency plan
with information on countries that had
extradition plans.”
As if the brothers needed more trou-
ble, Lyle actually titled one document
“Key Questions” and wrote down such
concerns as “How will they be looking
for us? Can we get an appearance
change? How do our girlfriends fit in?”
Other papers mentioned “safe houses”
and listed various entries: “three pass-
puits with different names. Need fe
nances. Need silencer. Extradition.”
As it turned out, the plot was merely
a paper tiger. It was found that the
brothers had no part in cutting the
chains. After accusing the Menendezes
of attempted escape, the sheriff’s de-
partment recanted. The escape plans
were never mentioned during the trial.
THE ABUSE EXCUSE IS BORN
In early summer 1990, a few months
after Lyle and Erik were arrested,
Leslie Abramson, Erik's attorney, con-
tacted Dr. William Vicary, a renowned
forensic psychiatrist. Dr. Vicary has de-
grees from Harvard Law School and
the University of Southern California
Medical School. In addition to con-
ducting psychiatric evaluations for the
Los Angeles County Superior Court
system, he has run a sex offender treat-
ment program at USC.
Abramson asked Vicary to “get in-
volved—do your thing,” which meant
to spend time with the Menendez
brothers and form a professional opin-
ion. He already had an opinion based
on what he knew from the media.
“When I started, I completely accepted
the prosecution's theory of the case,”
he recalls. “I thought they were rich
kids who were pissed off at their over-
bearing, oppressive parents. They
Killed so they could go on with their
lives and have the money.” But as a
psychiatrist, he knew children rarely
kill their parents. And when they do,
they often have been victims of terri-
ble abuse.
Vicary had a hunch that the father,
Jose Menendez, was going to turn out
to be a monster. But he was puzzled by
the mother, Kitty. “It’s rare when kids
kill their mother. I couldn't believe Kit-
ty had been doing nasty, rotten things
to her own children,” he said. “Itshows
my own naivete.”
A week after Abramson called, Vic-
ary was face-to-face with Lyle and Erik.
The first few minutes were awkward.
“There’s no point in beating around
the bush,” Abramson said. “We have a
tough situation and Dr. Vicary is here
to help us. We all know you guys did it.
Isn't that right?" Everybody smiled ex-
cept Vicary.
His sessions with Erik took place in a
iterview room down the hall from
5 nine-by-seven-foot cell. With the
door of the room closed to shut out the
constant din of the jail, the tempera-
ture in the room felt as if it were 100
degrees. Vicary occasionally took notes
as he sat across from Erik, who was
chained to a chair.
During the sessions, Erik described
Jose as a “mental manipulator.” Kitty
“loved us but hated us.” She yelled to
her sons that she wished “they'd never
been bum.” Juse repeatedly told the
brothers what he could've done “if I
had your start.” They “grew to hate
him.” At one point, Jose told Lyle and
Erik he had “disinherited and dis-
owned them.”
Vicary believes both brothers were
emotionally immature, many years be-
hind their peers. “Erik was probably a
person about 8 to 12—somewhere in
that range. Lyle was a little more ad-
vanced, but from an emotional point of
view, he was probably in the 12 to 14
age range. Both of them were very im-
mature from a psychological perspec-
tive, Both knew how to conduct them-
selves in a superficial way to avoid
sticking out from other people.
Late one night in his cell, Erik was
startled by someone speaking to him. It
was his father's voice. It sounded “like
a stone, like the devil" and he told Vic-
ary he would “do anything not to hear
it again.” Sometimes the voice would
whisper to him in a dream. But on oth-
er occasions it would scream, “You're
stupid!” “You're not worthy of being a
Menendez!” or “It’s your fault!” just as
his father had in real life.
When it came to patients hearing
voices, Vicary found this persuasive.
“Real patients tell you it’s like someone
is in the room standing next to them
talking,” says Vicary. “The people who
make it up talk about voices inside
their heads.” To Erik, it sounded as if
his father were right next to him, an
actual presence in his cell
Erik frequently became emotional,
shaking and crying during their mect-
ings. Vicary was surprised during their
eleventh session when Erik said being
in jail was “relaxing, like a vacation.”
‘There was one other thing he was re-
lieved about: “Now we don't have to suc-
ceed,” he said about his and Lyle's lives.
A frustrated Abramson sometimes
became agitated with Vicary on the
phone. “What's happening? Why can't
you get more?” she demanded. “We
need the answers.” The mystery began
to unravel during Erik and Vicary’s
26th meeting. Erik spoke about his
cousin Andy Cano, his best friend from
the ages of ten to 14. According to Erik,
Andy “knew about the problems with
my father.” In recent weeks, Erik con-
stantly woke up crying in his cell after
dreaming about his parents. “M, I hate
you,” Erik had said, according to Vic-
ary's notes. “Found out one week prior
to killings M knew F molested Erik.”
After that, the details poured out of
Erik. “F not having sex with М. . .. Age
five to six F massaged sore musdes
from sports . . . eventually told me to
turn over... massaged my реп...
told me it was a tension release . . . oral
sex since seven or eight. .. asked me to
give him massage and oral sex . . .
sudumy al age IT... I ciel out, but nu
one was home .. . I was torn apart
inside.”
“It was difficult,” Erik tearfully relat-
ed to Vicary. “My father told me over
and over he'd beat me to death if I told
anyone. I was afraid he'd hurt me, kill
me or not love me.”
Enik had been afraid to say no. Lyle
was furious when Erik revealed his mo-
lestation to Lyle a few days before the
killings. “That's it,” proclaimed Lyle.
Erik said his brother insisted on con-
fronting their father. Jose warned Lyle
not to challenge his authority. “I had
no pity for my mother when I found
out she knew what my father was do-
ing to me,” Erik told Vicary. "I was
ashamed of it all my life.”
"THE D.A’S SHRINKING SHRINKS,
Why didn't prosecutors put their
own psychological experts on the stand
to counter the defense? "I'm not going
to answer that,” lead prosecutor Pam-
ela Bozanich said at a press conference
following the mistrial. The decision not
to rebut the molestation claims was
clearly a tactical error.
Unknown to the public, prosecutors
had two doctors in the courtroom lis-
tening to every word of Lyle's and
Erik's testimony. Dr. Saul Faerstein is
a forensic psychiatrist who teaches at
(continued on page 74)
We see you! We see you!”
РНОТОСКАРНУ ВУ
STEPHEN WAYDA
ROM THE balcony of
her apartment in Los Angeles, Sandra
Taylor has a full view of the Pacific
Ocean. But her eyes are headed in anoth-
er direction now: She has picked out the
Hollywood home of Oliver Stone and
confesses an ambition to work with direc-
tors of his caliber. “Pm not here by mis-
take,” says the model-turned-actress, who
arrived in movieland from Port Chester,
New York. “I have a goal, a strategy, a
plan.” Her early fame was based on still
photography: Her sexy poster and pin-
up calendars were hot sellers. From there
she moved on to MTV and a Def Lep-
pard video, then landed a role in Garry
Marshall's bondage comedy Exit to Eden.
The woman with a plan now moves on-
ward and upward to Steven Seagal's
Under Siege 2: Dark Territory. She plays an
imperiled bartender on a train who may.
or may not, die in the line of duty.
“We filmed it both ways,” says Sandra.
Whatever her character's fate, Sandra’s
career is thriving —TOM GREEN
with а killer role
in under siege 2, sandra
taylor is on her way в
A
Sandra's pal (and fellaw poster star) Fabia coaxed her to move fram New York ta Las Angeles to boast her career. She left behind ane-
time flame Donald Trump ond fan Howard Stern, who—ever the gentleman—once pleaded for a private glimpse of Sandra's charms.
She declined. What the shock jock yearned for, Sandro now willingly presents for PLAYBOY readers’ pleasure. Eat your heart out, Howard.
PLAYBOY
68
MEL GIBSON „нев 56
He deserves death. He attacked me at an elemental
level. He’s lucky he’s still walking.
your attention, are you tempted?
GIBSON: Everyone is—isn't that the hu-
man condition? But all those things
GIBSON: Your life changes. 1 don't
know if it’s that easy to explain the phe-
nomenon of celebrity. It's something
you have to learn to live with. The by-
products of stardom can spoil you. It
has aspects that are not pleasant. I can't
be like I was anymore. There's no need
to beat myself up over it because I've
been through that process. What hap-
pened to me was that I was pissed off
that fame wasn’t what it should have
been. It's like a lot of nastiness is associ-
ated with it. There are a lot of nasty
people, and then there's the dishon-
esty. So you have to become very pro-
tective in the way you view things. You
have to change your whole plan of
existence,
PLAYBOY: What other problems did be-
coming famous cause you?
GIBSON: There are people who try to
grab on and go through the gate with
you, because they can’t do it them-
selves. You find alot of people interact-
ing or doing things for not very good
reasons. $о you have to deal with ass-
holes. Not everybodys an asshole,
though sometimes you wonder.
PLAYBOY: How uncomfortable does it
get for you?
GIBSON: There was an article in the Los
Angeles Times telling where my kids go
to school. That makes me very ner-
vous. That makes you want to ask the
reporter what his head's made of.
PLAYBOY: We can understand why that
makes you angry.
GIBSON: Newspapers make me mad be-
cause they lie. About everything. When
I watch news programs I just get livid,
because they're not fair. They don't tell
the truth about anything.
PLAYBOY: Is the European press more
scandalous than the American press?
GIBSON: Yeah. The British press is hei-
nous. They love their smut. The Amer-
ican press has a category for it on the
supermarket shelf. But the British
press, their regular newspapers are
like that, You don't know what's going
on in the country, but you know who's
fucking who. Whether it’s true or not is
another thing. And then there's the 11
o'clock news here, which tells you un-
truths. It drives me crazy. It’s like the
O.J. Simpson thing—I can't watch it
105 disgusting. And that makes me
mad, It's 1984: "Lers all put up a
figure of hatred. There's the villain.”
And they vent all their anger and their
rage on O.J.
PLAYBOY: There may already be a ver-
dict by the time this interview appears,
but without knowing what that might
be, do you have an opinion of what will
happen to O.J.?
GIBSON: 1 think they'll put him in jail
for a long time. I don't think he'll get
off. It’s been great for the politicians
and the president, because it’s taken
the heat off them. I find it disgusting.
The main winners here are the people
who have other agendas that they don’t
want to be too public about. Whitewa-
ter or whatever. It’s all been brushed
aside because this is the biggest thing.
PLAYBOY: Well, let's put the spotlight on
you.
GIBSON: I hate talking about me and
what I believe. I always find it to be
painful. It’s like making a large target
out of yourself. You make yourself very
vulnerable.
pLarsor: Has this been painful so far?
GIBSON: Yeah. I'm just feeling like,
Why am I saying all this stuff? One al-
ways tries to maintain some sense of
mystery. That’s why these damn things
are so painful, because you are giving
a little more away. This is not a natural
situation
PLAYBOY: Are you sorry that you're do-
ing this?
GIBSON: I probably will be when I read
it. I get real weird afterward. I'll prob-
ably drop out someplace and hide.
PLAYBOY: Have you ever considered
writing a book to get your story out the
way you want it?
GIBSON: No, other people do them for
me. And they just make it up. One of
them, Jesus Christ! I have 10 pray for
the guy who did it so 1 don't kill him.
Because the motherfucker hasn't got
any balls. He's a pussy and 1 hope I
never meet him, because I'd tear his
fucking face right off! He's one of those
tabloid-press low-life scumbags from
England who's making a buck. There's
a lot of money to be made in unautho-
rized biographies.
PLAYBOY: Which is why they get written.
GIBSON: But, you know, when you read
this one you say, “My God, you know
what he's done? He's written a book
about himself” Thats what he did.
Then I started to feel sorry for him.
PLAYBOY: But not sorry enough to for-
give him if you meet him?
GIBSON: I don't think God will put him
in my path. He deserves death. He at-
tacked me at an elemental level. He at-
tacked my wife, my family, my father,
my whole being. He's lucky he's still
walking. He's geuing to you in the
most underhanded, nasty way, threat-
ening everything you have, everything
you are, saying that you're a worthless
piece of shit. And that the people who
gave birth to you are scumbags and re-
ally nasty people. And everyone you've
ever met or touched you trampled on
and fucked over. And that you're weird
and warped and it’s like you are fuck-
ing Hitler. I'm Hitler and my dad is
Mussolini!
PLAYBOY: Did your dad read the book?
GIBSON: Yeah, he did.
PLAYBOY: What did he say?
GIBSON: He doesn't give a hoot. It bugs
the shit out of me, but it doesn't both-
er him.
PLAYBOY. Your dad's an unusual man,
isn't Ве?
GIBSON: He's just a regular guy who
worked long hours, supported a big
family and kept us all in shoes and
food.
PLAYBOY: That's a pretty brief summa-
tion of a man who went from working
on a railroad to winning on Jeopardy to
moving his family to Australia. What
else can you tell us about him?
GIBSON: He didnt get to know his
mother because she was dead by the
time he was two. He lived through the
Depression with a father who was dy-
ing and a brother who was a fuckup.
Goes off to Guadalcanal in World War
Two, gets the Purple Heart for some-
thing—he doesn’t talk about it much.
In the meantime, he goes to а seminary
because he’s very spiritual. Comes
back, gets married, has children.
Writes books about canon law and
Catholicism.
PLAYBOY: Have you read them?
GIBSON: Yeah. He is pretty sound
canonically and theologically. He's a
bookish guy. Uses words I've never
heard of.
PLAYBOY: What does he have to do with
the Alliance for Catholic Tradition,
which one magazine called “ап ex-
treme conservative Catholic splinter
group”?
GIBSON: He started it. Some people say
it’s extreme, but it emphasizes what the
institution was and where it's going.
Everything he was taught to believe
was taken from him in the Sixties with
this renewal Vatican Council. The
whole institution became unrecogniz-
able to him, so he writes about it.
PLAYBOY: Is it true that he took your
family ю Australia during the height
of the Vietnam war because he didn't
(continued on page 136)
“Гт properly warmed up. How about you?”
Fashion Ву
WHEN rr comes to Americana, Hawaiian shirts rank with hot dogs and ap-
ple pie. Born сис of rebellion, their spirited history dates back to the days
when Western missionaries insisted that the natives cover their “heathen
nakedness.” Rather than copy the drab clothing of their new uptight
neighbors, Hawaiians used vegetable dyes to hand-paint Polynesian mo-
ЧЁ on work shirts and other garments. The colorful styles soon became
coveted souvenirs, with a celebrity following that ranged from Elvis to
Eisenhower. Today, authentic Hawaiian “aloha shirts” are valuable col-
lectibles that sell for as much as $6000 each. Of course, anyone who wants
to hang loose for less can pick up vintage copies that replicate the originals
right down to the coconut-shell buttons. Wear one under a sports jacket
for dress-down Fridays or with khaki pants or shorts on the weekend.
а@ аад
ГТ о ЕЕ | ао зов оо во ооо в онооно ево воно товоо воно вов оооско
Е =
ONCE THE TREASURE OF PRESIDENTS AND POP
STARS, HAWAIIAN SHIRTS ARE BACK WITH VINTAGE
DETAILS AND ISLAND MOTIFS THAT ADD COLOR
o
AND CHARACTER TO YOUR CASUAL SUMMER DRESS
PHOTOGRAPHY BY JAMES IMBROGNO
President Harry Truman, Elvis
Presley, Tony Curtis and
Dorathy Lamour are just a
few of the celebs who made
the Hawaiian look a hit dur-
ing the Forties and Fifties.
shirt is made af silk with co-
conut-shell butions and а va-
cationland print that mixes
modes of travel with Hawai-
ian culture, by Avanti ($55). 71
The tropical trappings pictured
opposite (clockwise from top
lef) begin with а silk border
print shirt with beige palm tree
and volcano motif and coconut-
shell buttons, by Avanti ($65), а
Forties remake in rayon with a
blue ground, sugarcane motif
and coconut shell buttons, by
AAArdvork's ($125), an outhen-
tic rayon tourist shirt circa 1940
with а nowy ground and a print
that combines a mop of the
Howaiian Islands and recre-
otional octivities, from Golyester
{about $1500), a cotton and
rayon shirt with a dark green
ground ond morlin game-fishing
motif, by Que ($46), o royon vin-
toge-style shirt with a yellow
ground and Treasure Island mo-
tif feoturing palm trees and
grass shacks, by GMSurf (about
$40), and a rayon shirt circa
1950 with а navy ground and а
print that mixes pineapples and
exotic flowers, from Radio Hula
(about $300). Right: It's all in
the details, which, i
this retro-style shi
small pictures of tiki statues,
surfers, outrigger canoes and
other facets of Hawaiian life, by
Reyn Spooner (about $60).
WHERE & HOW TO BUY ON PAGE 159.
PLAYBOY
74
MENENDEZ comio ron peso
One hour into deliberations, all six women voted for
manslaughter. The six men voted for murder.
USC and frequently provides expert
testimony throughout the country.
Joining Dr. Faerstein was Dr. Spencer
Eth, an expert in child psychology.
“They're very thorough, very сопза-
entious and very confident,” says one
associate.
Vicary spoke with Faerstein after the
trial and says both doctors had doubts
after they heard the testimony: “It
doesn't mean they agreed with every-
thing about the molestation evidence,
but they weren't willing to try to knock
it down. They really couldn't be of any
help. That's why they weren't called.”
Faerstein has a different recollection
of their conversation: “I never told
Vicary 1 bought even а minuscule
amount of the molestation evidence. 1
don’t buy it. Categorically, 1 don’t be-
lieve the story at all. The whole thing
was fabricated.” He says Vicary is
“speculating” about his and Dr. Eth's
positions.
Vicary contends neither doctor was
looking forward to confronting him.
“We all know one another well,” he
says. “They know I don't make things
up.” Vicary believes the prospect of
weathering cross-examination by
Abramson may have also been a factor.
“They had no interest in doing that. If
it had been a different case with less
able attorneys and less publicity they
might have been willing to come in and
do a little nibbling around the edges.
Inthese big cases, you better be ready.”
Faerstein says he wasn't afraid of
Abramson or Jill Lansing, Lyle’s lead
attorney. He frequently testifies and is
а veteran of tough cross-examinations.
But the Menendez prosecution team
didn’t follow through on a pretrial re-
quest to have their own experts exam-
ine the brothers. “I will not testify
about someone's mental state at the
ume of the crime if I have not exam-
ined them, because there are ethical
concerns,” says Faerstein.
"Ifthey were molested, it doesn't ex-
cuse what was done nor providea men-
tal impairment sufficient to lower the
level of criminal responsibility even to
second-degree murder unless the jury
just feels sorry for them and says we
won't convict anyone of first-degree
murder if they have been abused or
molested.”
THE TRIAL WITHIN ATRIAL
The star psychological witness of the
first Menendez trial will have a greatly
diminished role the next time around.
Jerome Oziel, the therapist Erik con-
fessed to five months before the broth-
ers were arrested, may not testify.
Oziel's appearance resulted in a six-
day cross-examination that exposed
every detail of the stormy relationship
with his former mistress, Judalon
Smyth. After her romance with the psy-
chologist soured, Smyth went to the
police in March 1990 and said that she
had overheard the brothers confess
to Oziel. Lyle and Erik were arrested
days later.
In a lawsuit she filed against Oziel,
Smyth claimed she was his patient and
accused him of beating, drugging, kid-
napping and raping her. But a coun-
tersuit filed by Oziel and his wife main-
tained that Smyth was a desperately
disturbed woman who came into their
lives and held them hostage in their
home with a series of threats that in-
cluded suicide, murder and exposure
of confidential information about the
Menendez case. Smyth reportedly re-
ceived a settlement of between
$400,000 and $500,000 Пош Оле!
malpractice insurance.
On the eve of Smyth’s appearance as
a defense witness to discredit Oziel, the
former lovers met in a conference
room at a Los Angeles law firm. The
meeting was an attempt to settle a law-
suit Oziel filed against Vanity Fair writer
Dominick Dunne and Smyth, whom
Dunne had quoted extensively (she
said she'd had with Oziel “the worst sex
of my life”) in an October 1990 article.
Oziel settled with Dunne and the mag-
azine, but not with Smyth. As he was
leaving the meeting, Smyth charges
that Oziel pushed against her sugges-
tively while whispering in her ear, "You
slut. You know you still want me.” Wit-
nesses say she spun around and threw
a glass of water in his face. Oziel denies
making the remarks to Smyth, and his
attorney, Raj Patrao, said the incident
was not an assault but "an unfortunate
touching of the body at a deposition."
A suit stemming from the meeting,
seeking unspecified damages, accuses
Oziel of battery, negligence and inten-
tionally inflicting emotional distress.
This past January, Smyth filed her
third lawsuit against the therapist, al-
leging that Oziel's libel suit (which was
dismissed in February 1994) had been
filed in order to harass her. According
to Smyth’s new claim, Oziel's suit
lacked proper legal grounds and was
malicious prosecution. While Oziel
continues to deny any wrongdoing, he
closed his Beverly Hills therapy prac-
tice and moved back to his hometown
of Seattle.
THE FRANKFURTER CONNECTION
A single jury will deliberate the fate
of both brothers in the retrial. At
Menendez I, Lyle and Erik each had
their own juries because some evidence
applied to only one brother. Shurtling
the parallel panels in and out of the
tiny courtroom became а logistical
nightmare that won't be repeated.
Even though jurors are instructed
not to consider potential penalties, the
men on Erik’s panel worried about set-
ting a precedent. Anything less than a
first-degree murder conviction, they
argued, would lead to the widespread
use of the “abuse excuse” defense. One
hour into the deliberations, all six
women on Erik's jury voted for man-
slaughter. The six men voted for the
murder charge.
Even though jury deliberations are
t, Erik heard with-
jury was split even-
ly along gender lines. Some jurors had
shared the information with the owner
of a hot dog cart outside the court-
house. The hot dog vendor told some-
body else. Within a few hours it was the
worst kept secretin Van Nuys.
JUROR VS. JUROR
In early 1994 jurors sympathetic to
the defense stayed in touch. Several
struck up friendships with the brothers
through jail visits and phone calls and
one even played chess with Lyle over
the phone.
As lawyers began picking the jury for
O.J. Simpson's trial, there was renewed
interest from talk show producers in
jurors who had served on high-profile
cases. Two Menendez veterans were al-
ready regulars on the talk circuit, with
appearances on Donahue, Oprah and
Prime Time Live. Jude Nelson was an
outspoken advocate for a first-de,
murder conviction. The unemployed,
ponytailed 53-year-old Army veteran
with three children told a fellow juror
he'd once been a “psychic to the stars."
Judy Zamos, a 55-year-old nurse and
teacher married to an attorney, was
one of the j rs who believed the
brothers. Although she was an alter-
nate juror, other jurors had angrily
vented their frustrations during delib-
erations by telling her what was hap-
pening behind closed doors. Nelson
and Zamos traded insults while ap-
pearing on The Maury Povich Show in
late August 1994. In the opening min-
utes of the program, Nelson accused
Zamos of trying to get him kicked off
(continued on page 76)
PIRAN BION ОА BERN
Helmut Newton is renowned for his signature brand of А PLAYBOY contributor for more than two decades, Newton
kinky eroticism. Born in Berlin, he launched his career with was the natural choice to shoot our January 1991 feature
British and French Vogue, then earned worldwide notoriety on voyeurism. He defined the concept visually with this vid-
for his edgy portraits and sexually charged fashion photos. eo fantasy featuring October 1989 Playmate Karen Foster. 75
PLAYBOY
76
MENENDEZ „ал
Lyle laughed and said,
“We've snowed half the
country. Now we have to snow the other half.”
the jury so she could replace him. “I
feel that she has absolutely no
credibility,” he blustered. “If Judy is
normal, 1 wouldn't want to be normal
for anything.”
Zamos explained that she had re-
signed as an alternate juror after be-
coming troubled when she heard
“some of the things that were happen-
ing in the jury room.”
Nelson said he had learned from one
of the attorneys connected to the case
that Zamos was dismissed from the tri-
al for misconduct. Zamos was out-
raged. The discussion deteriorated in-
to a shouting match as the pair argued
about Nelson’s contact with the me-
dia. (During deliberations, Nelson had
bragged to other jurors that he had
talked to “his friend” Ron Reagan that
morning. “Is he a friend of yours?”
asked one. “Yeah,” he reportedly re-
plied. “I don’t have much use for his
father, but he’s a good guy.” Nelson an-
nounced to others seated at a cafete-
ria table that Reagan was shooting
“an MTV segment on the trial.” Sever-
al were uncomfortable because jurors
were forbidden to talk with the media.
Zamos reported Nelson’s remarks to
the judge, who took no action after
questioning Nelson.)
After Zamos accused Nelson of hir-
ing an agent to seek out TV appear-
ances (he denied it), there were more
fireworks. As petty insults Нем across
the studio, the audience roared with
laughter.
“Hey, folks—any of you who want to
be on a long trial, you think twice,” de-
clared Zamos. “These are people you
wouldn't talk to in your entire life if
you had a choice.”
“If they would allow me, I would
pull the gas chamber pellets on Lyle,”
declared Nelson a few minutes later. “I
can't believe that we have jurispru-
dence such that”
At that point Zamos interrupted:
“Oh God—he's learned a three-syllable
word. I car't believe this. Do you be-
lieve how ignorant he is? Would you
want your life to be in this man's
hands?"
"Ignorant?" he replied. “ОБ, come
оп, give me а break, lady!"
“Oh, I need to give you a break.”
Instead, Zamos sued Nelson. In the
suit filed by her attorney husband,
Zamos declared she was slandered by
Nelson's comment that she'd been "dis-
missed for misconduct.” In fact, she as-
serted, she was excused not for wrong-
doing but “as a result of her request
based on personal and philosophical
concerns." A week later, Nelson's attor-
ney, Phillip Rose, wrote to Zamos’ hus-
band Jerry: “Mr. Nelson is a man of
limited assets and financial means and
can ill-afford to bear the legal costs of
defending this lawsuit. Unfortunately,
Mr. Nelson is not married to an attor-
ney, а distinct and unfair advantage
that your client has over my client.”
Ten days after that, Nelson filed a
countersuit accusing Zamos of slander
for calling him “ignorant” and accusing
him of “making а career out of doing
talk shows.”
In the ensuing months, the court file
grew into two thick volumes. At a hear-
ing in February, the judge presiding
over the case said both sides “deserved
what they gor for appearing on talk
shows.”
А STAR IS BORN
Of course. the Los Angeles County
District Attorney's office didn't like the
outcome of the first Menendez trial.
But the weeks that followed the trial
weren't much more pleasant. Abram-
son was everywhere. Marie Claire mag-
azine declared her one of America’s
foremost “ball-busters.” The New York
Times called her the “queen of mira-
cles.” Barbara Walters named her one
of the ten most fascinating people of
1994. Over and over again, she kicked
sand in District Attorney Gil Garcetti's
face. And she enjoyed it.
By the time of the first hearing a
month after the mistrial, Abramson
had assumed a new stature. TV crews
followed her into the courthouse, bare-
ly keeping pace with the autograph
hounds. Several former jurors also
lined the hallway. As Abramson ap-
proached the courtroom door, she saw
Nelson—atypically wearing a suit and
tie—offering to shake hands. Pausing,
she recognized him before withdraw-
ing her hand and walking by. “She evi-
dently doesn't like my point of view,”
he said to no one in particular. “That’s
fine with me. I don't like hers, either.”
A few weeks later, Nelson was back, pa-
tiently waiting again at the courtroom
door. “Good morning, Miss Abram-
son,” he said cheerfully. “Good morn-
ing, Mr. Nelson. I see you still haven't
gotten a life yet.”
IF AT FIRST YOU DONT SUCCEED
For the retrial Сагсеш replaced the
original prosecution team. David
Conn, the 44-year-old acting head of
the D.A’s special trials unit, was named
the new lead prosecutor. The New
York native joined the district attor-
ney's office in 1978 after graduating
from Columbia University Law School.
Conn previously served in the sex
crimes, special investigations and or-
ganized crime divisions.
Joining Conn is 36-year-old Carol
Najera, a ten-year-veteran deputy dis-
trict attorney. Both Conn and Najera
have prosecuted death-penalty cases,
but Najera's appointment was not pop-
ular within the D.A.'s office. Garcetti
urged his staff to “get behind” the new
team, but moments later seemed to un-
dercut Najera: “David Conn is the per-
son assigned to the case. He will be
handling 95 percent of it. He asked
that Carol be assigned to the case. I
said, ‘Yes, she will be a fine assistant for
Dave."
in weeks, there was already sig-
nificant animosity between Abramson
and the new prosecution team. At one
hearing, Conn accused Abramson of
wanting to delay the start of the trial
because of her “financial arrangement”
to provide commentary on the O.J.
Simpson case for ABC News. When a
police witness asked to have a picture
taken with Abramson, Najera said,
“That's disgusting—this hero worship
of you.” Abramson replied, “As much
as you hate me now, you'll be apoplec-
tic at the end of trial." The witness’
mother turned to Najera and told her,
“You're the rudest person I've ever
met.” A delighted Abramson maintains
that Najera is “the greatest asset of the
defense case.”
LYLE MAKES А FRIEND
The ability of the Menendez case to
attract controversial characters contin-
ued with the emergence of Martha
Jane Shelton, a Falls Church, Virginia
woman who became hooked on Court
TV's coverage of the trial. Shelton
wrote to Lyle after watching him testify.
She too was an abuse victim. When
Lyle phoned her, she told him details of
her life she’d never revealed before.
The 30-year-old single mother was so
dedicated, she even began raising
money for the defense fund at a Falls
Church bar in addition to urging
friends to pray for the brothers.
But the night of the mistrial declara-
tion, Shelton says she heard a different
side of Lyle during a phone call from
jail. He was arrogant, cocky. At one
point, Shelton claims, Lyle laughed
and said, “We've snowed half the coun-
try. Now we have to snow the other
half.” She was shocked.
(continued on page 151)
LOOK! UP IN THE SKY!
IT’S A TOON, IT’S LITERATURE,
IT’S THE NEW POSTMODERN
ARTICLE BY JOHN TOMKIW
WHEN MOST people think comic books,
they think simple pictures and simple
plots—big guys in leotards pounding
one another while saying, “Feel the
righteous sting of my unbridled
fury!" After all, 80 percent of the esti-
mated $1 billion U.S. comic book mar-
ketis driven by testosterone in tights,
secret identities and adolescent bat-
tles of good versus evil, Then there's
the other 20 percent. In the rack that
has held the pen-and-ink porn of
Cherry or the aging hippie sedition of
The Fabulous Furry Freak Brothers, a
The graphic staries published by Vertiga break every canvention established by its
superhera-driven parent, DC Comics. For example, Gallery af Dreams (obove)—an
offshaot af the Sandman series—has no wards. Canjuring up the dream king sim-
ply requires a leap of frags. Below, the vivid and disturbing artwark from The Mys-
tery Play, drawn by Jon Muth, brings a detective's obsessive hallucinations to life
тик LOST CLASSIC BY
BRAWINGS BY
<40UR0 Ur-£ mzrx4
A lost classic? Well, maybe. But with drawings by
а Pulitzer Prize winner, an obscure рает by
Joseph Mancure Murch (Tle Wild Puriy, above)
joins the growing list of art lit. Various artists rade
the Residents’ bandwagen far Freak Show (below).
new breed of illustrated mag—
smart, gritty and literate—has
reached adulthood. It’s a fusion
of art and literature: the post-
modern comic.
The form hit new heights—in
content and readership—when
Art Spiegelman's graphic novel
Maus won the Pulitzer Prize in
1992. The two books in the series
recount Spiegelman's journey of
understanding as his elderly fa-
ther tells him about his survival
in a Nazi concentration camp.
But here the son and father are
PAGES FROM Ч A ARAS mice and the Nazis are cats: the
ee; ў ultimate Tom and Jerry cartoon.
THE RARE ) 2 3 Spiegelman's autobiographical
FIRST 3 ISSUES N work is ап extension of the sex-
OF THE COMICS 4 E ; RS COD comm
N of the late Sixties. The horrors о!
MAGAZINE FOR Auschwitz are juxtaposed with
DAMNED \ Y a quirky encounters with his
INTELLECTUALS! 4 А cranky father; an argument over
A wooden matches turns into a
vaudeville routine.
In his collaborations with Six-
ties comic master R. Crumb,
writer Harvey Pekar also pio-
neered the push into self-reflec-
tive realism. The American Splen-
dor series chronicles the life of
Pekar, a curmudgeon from
Cleveland. David Letterman
took notice, calling Pekar’s exis-
tence one of “whining despera-
tion,” and Pekar began showing
up as Dave's late-night sparring
partner, later re-creating the Let-
terman appearances in his comic
books. In 1994’s Our Cancer Year,
Pekar and his wife, Joyce Brab-
ner, detail his battle with the dis-
ease. Our Cancer Year is available
in a particularly wide range of
bookstores, and not in the sec-
tion where you'd find Garfield.
Meanwhile, Crumb—perhaps
The illustrated encyclopedia: Raw (above) was the
majar force behind a resurgence of adult comics dur-
ing the past decade. Issues featured Charles Bums’
"Dog Boy" (a teen werepup wha has a habit af bury-
ing his girlfriend’s high heels), attacks on Reaganism
by Sue Coe, the jagged stick figures of Mark Beyer
and "limbo," atomic age angst by Gary Panter Art
Spiegelman, wha launched Raw in 1980 with wife
Francoise Mauly, calls it “an avant-garde comics
magazine for your bamb shelter’s caffee table.” De-
spite its synthesis of high ort and paranoia, Raw
found a distributor in Penguin USA, Although the
original oversize layout was reduced—much to the
dismay of early fans—the trade-paperback versions
reached circulations of 40,000. Soon Raw's contribu-
tors were in demand at art galleries, Informed more
by movies than by fine art, Thirteen O'Clack (right)
lampoons mysteries with а Mr. Murmur plat as ridicu-
lous as the fille; Duplex Plonet Illustrated (far right)
tums an ald age home inte а planet of the japes
art spiegelman,
In
(|
best known for drawing Мт. Natural—has tackled the work of
Franz Kafka by illustrating his stories in Introducing Kafka.
From his early work on Zap Comix and Fritz the Cat to today's
explication of a mad Czech author, Crumb is an example of
how times have changed—and how comics have changed with
them: Introducing Kafka is а Cliff Notes for the postliterate gen-
eration. While Crumb's grotesque depiction of cockroach Greg-
or Samsa (from Metamorphosis) writhes across the page, Crumb
and partner David Zane Mairowitz position Kafka as a product
of his environment. They emphasize the humor of Kafka's ab-
surdist despair and reconsider him as a Weimar-era Woody
Allen. “What do I have in common with the Jews?” Kafka
writes. “I don't even have anything in common with myself."
Although alternative comics have finally arrived, they still
don't get respect. “They're the bastard children of both art and
literature—neither side claims them, but their roots are in both
of them,” says Denis Kitchen, cartoonist and publisher of
Kitchen Sink Press. “Pointy-head intellectuals in both camps
think comics are beneath contempt.”
Nonetheless, а new generation of talent is finding its voice in
comics. Using pictures in the place of exposition, comic book
confessionals—riding the success of Spiegelman and Crumb—
have crowded the field. One noteworthy book is Wild Life, by
writer and illustrator Peter Kuper. In it, Kuper recounts his
not-so-suave youth, a series of false starts in a race to lose
his virginity. Propositioned by a (text continued on page 134)
Art Spiegelman's Maus (above lefi) convinced even unregenerate
snobs that comic books possess artistic merit. While Like a Velvet
Glove Cast in Iron {below left) thrives outside the mainstream, the
peerless R. Crumb has come up from the underground with Introduc-
ing Katka (below). Traditionol superheroes have also felt the impact of
the new comics. The Joker is at right; Batman is on the opposing ропе!
CAROL SHAYA: BUSTED
the пура had a few things on its mind, like crime and corruption—
so it fired the best-looking cop on the force
arguably the most alluring cop to walk the streets of the Bronx’ 45th Precinct, logs in a
surprise patrol through the pages of rravBov's August 1994 issue. Readers voice their
approval, the media Ваз а field day (Shaya pops up in everything from The Times of London
to Geraldo's hot seat), but the suits—in this case Police Commissioner William Bratton and
Mayor Rudolph Giuliani—decide to show the world just how tough they can get with an “em-
barrassment” like Shaya. The verdict: New York's sexiest and finest is first demoted to a desk
job. then sacked from the force altogether. “Discrimination is something that cannot he
pushed aside,” says Shaya, who is fighting back with a $10 million lawsuit against Giuliani, the
city and the NYPD. “Still, the past year has brought me lots of emotional highs. Thanks го all
the support I've received, I've found happiness and joy.” Ten four, Carol. We copy that.
A 5 wrth many good cop stories, the events unfolded dramatically. Officer Carol Shaya,
“I had mixed emotions of
anger ond sadness leaving
the force,” says Shaya
ing out for the lost time,
above; blissfully out of uni-
form, below and opposite]
never thought | would experi
ence that.” Still, Shayo is up-
beat off the beat. “Pim al-
ready working on а few movie
deals,” she soys. “The next
yeor should be interesting.”
84
ROAD
TEST
fiction By LENNY KLEINFELD
when it came fo travel, the lady
was а champ—with intriguing ideas
on how to spend a vacation
RATT LUCKED into the road test when he was
24, the first and only time he'd been on the
verge of becoming an official fiancé. He
and Suzie were suspiciously compatible. The sex
was good and so was the talk. They were into the
same movies and music. They liked each other's
friends. Her family wasn't insane. His family was,
but liked Suzie so much that when they were
around her they pretended to be bearable.
Pratt and Suzie moved in together, a real find
on the top floor of a rent-controlled building on
West End Avenue. It was the first time either of
them had risked sharing bills and a bathroom.
Things went remarkably smooth, Their friends
and relatives remarked on it. It was a way of ask-
ing when Pratt and Suzie would tie the knot.
Pratt was wondering about that one day in the
lobby of their building as he waited for the eleva-
tor. Did love and marriage necessarily go togeth-
er like a horse and carriage? The carriage (mar-
riage) did require the horse (love), but you could
get around fine with just a horse. Though two
people riding a horse couldn't get as far as one
person on a horse or two people in a carriage. . . .
The elevator arrived and Pratt got on. As the
door was closing, the redhead from the fifth.
floor dashed aboard. She was in a playful mood.
She lightly but unmistakably invited Pratt to stop
in at her place and play. He declined.
Pratt was rattled. He’d never done—or rather
never not done—something like this before. Did
passing up the elevator offer mean he was more
in love with Suzie than he'd been willing to ad-
mit? Or did it mean he was losing his balls?
Pratt bought an engagement ring and suggest-
ed to Suzie that they rent a car and drive up to
ILLUSTRATION BY VIVIENNE FLESHER
PLAYBOY
86
Vermont for the weekend. They had
vacationed together once before, a
week at the beach on St. Barts; pure
fun, except for one particularly pain-
ful lesson about sand. Pratt had high
hopes for Vermont.
They left Manhattan on a cool,
bright morning, driving a shiny five-
liter Mustang, oh yeah. . . . Thirty-
three minutes later Suzie had to stop to
take a leak. Forty-two minutes later she
had to stop again. Suzie could absolute-
ly not make it through an hour of driv-
ing—except for the time she lasted 78
minutes, but only because by that point
they were no longer speaking.
It rained for two days. Their room
leaked. Suzie cried frequently and blew
her nose a lot.
At supper Saturday they worked to
regain their sense of humor and make
peace. Pratt revved up his courage to
pop the question. He looked deep into
Suzie's eyes, reached for the cham-
pagne bottle and knocked over the ice
bucket, sloshing an Arctic tide across
the lap of the 60ish gent at the next
table, who stiffened and groaned as
though he'd been harpooned, inspir-
ing his wife to cut loose with a shriek at
what she assumed was her untimely
widowhood.
Home Suzie would have been
amused. Road Suzie locked herself in
the bathroom and brushed her teeth
for a couple of hours. The weekend re-
mained damp in all the wrong places.
The diamond ring never came out of
Pratt's pocket. Within a month he was
out of the apartment.
A year later Pratt became infatuated
with Jane, who was extremely roman-
tic. Jane was forever surprising Pratt
with little gifts and social events, and
sudden sex in semipublic places. To
commemorate the six-month anniver-
sary of their first simultaneous orgasm
(Jane kept note of such things in her
hand-bound Florentine diaries), she
presented Pratt with tickets to Paris.
Precisely six months to the second
from their historic spasm duet, Pratt
and Jane were in a 747 restroom re-
creating the event.
They checked into a chic hideaway
in the Marais and made love in a large
chair by an open window. Then Jane
needed to do a little shopping. Some-
how it consumed the day. Their second
day in Paris was spent shopping. So
was the third. On the fourth day Pratt
lured Jane into the countryside by sug-
gesting they rent a car and go shop-
ping at wineries. But they stopped to
ask for directions at a village that was
having a crafis fair. Then there were
the antique shops. They spent the
night in a bed-and-breakfast run by the
cousin of a milliner with whom Jane
got along famously.
"The next morning Pratt suggested a
walk in the hills—and a romantic pic-
nic by a stream. Jane accused him of
being an Eagle Scout.
They drove back to the city. After
they dropped off the car Pratt asked if
they could go look at a painting or a
cathedral, seeing as how this was his
first time in Paris. Jane accused him of
being a tourist but consented to an art
auction.
They spent their final day shopping
for the extra luggage Jane required.
On the flight home they ae t мо-
late a single airline policy.
They left Kennedy in separate cabs.
And so it went.
During every takeoff and landing
Connie dug her nails into Pratt's arm
and muttered her litany: Flemeoul, wind
shear, hydraulic failure, collision, mad
bomber and all their variations. She was
convinced that chanting every possible
catastrophe was the only way to pre-
vent them. Connie also had a strict rule
against driving after dark in any for-
eign country, including California.
Mona got peevish on Kauai because
there was no reason to dress up and
the water was full of fish.
Bettina was shocked into sullen de-
pression when Mexico failed to run ac-
cording to the precisely planned daily
schedule she had mapped out some 11
months earlier.
Kelly's idea of travel was to go some-
place new for golf and tennis. Tennis
and golf. And golf.
Linda complained about the food
and the wine from one end of Italy to
the other:
Ellen couldn't go away for a weekend
without taking enough makeup, cos-
tume changes, electrical equipment
and taped music to supply a Madonna
tour.
joan had spent all summer every
summer of her life at the family cabin
оп a lake in Minnesota, and always
would.
Olga informed Pratt, the night be-
fore they were scheduled to leave, that
she had canceled their nonrefundable,
impossible-to-get reservations for a
Christmas week cross-country ski trip
through Yellowstone. Advice from her
astrologer.
Pratt was 39. All his friends from
school had been married at least once,
even the gays and lesbians. Hell, the
lesbian couple had two baster babies
and а Volvo. Pratt envied his friends’
rich emotional lives, the profound joy
they, their spouses and their kids took
in one another. Pratt's friends envied
his promiscuity. He was an efficiently
oiled bachelor. He had flings with girls
who were mainly interested in an edu-
cation and a decent meal. He had on-
going affairs/friendships with adult
women, wary veterans who, like Pratt,
kept their expectations in check and
their options open
Pratt loved to travel and did so
whenever possible. Usually alone.
Pratt decided to take himself to Eng-
land. Somehow he had been only once
before, a business trip to London:
three days and nights in a modern cor-
porate office and a modern corporate
hotel that could have been in any part
of the world that had electricity and
plumbing. This time it would be three
weeks of no work and nobody else's
itineraries, diets, taboos, bladders, ob-
sessions, luggage or astrologers. If that
meant three weeks of celibacy, fine. Of-
ten it didn't. Another advantage of
traveling alone.
Pratt's seatmate on the flight over
was the publisher of a Midwestern
equestrian magazine, a gregarious man
who was looking for investors to fund
his surefire plan to enter and dominate
the national market for glossy dressage
gossip.
A couple of time zones later the pub-
lisher paused long enough for Pratt to
excuse himself. As Pratt stood, the
woman in the seat behind his glanced
up from her book with what seemed to
be a small sympathetic grin. It was. As
Pratt walked past she wordlessiy of-
fered him a package of earplugs. Pratt
took a couple and did a quick, silent
salaam. The woman nodded and went
back to her novel. Pratt continued
down the aisle.
Pratt was staying at a small, mildly
extravagant hotel in South Kensing-
ton that provided limousine service.
‘There was another passenger sharing
the limo: the woman who traveled with
a ready supply of earplugs, generosity
and tact.
They chatted pleasantly on the ride
into town. Her name was Donna. She
correctly identified him as a West Sider
and he was right about her being an
East Sider. They established that this
was Pratt's first real visit to England
and that Donna had been there often.
She urged him to see some of the coun-
uyside as well as London. He assured
(continued on page 102)
“By God, we've achieved it, Hughes. А workplace without
any sexual harassment.”
88
catching up
with miss july
OME ON, let's get out of here,” says Heidi
Mark, a mischievous grin flickering
across her face. Then, in a voice breathy,
sultry and suggestive, she adds, “I'll
make you happy, baby." A second later the spell is
broken. “That is so not me!” she squeals, embar-
rassed. It is, in fact, Bebe Quinn, the character
she plays in aTV movie called Deadline for Murder:
From the Files of Edna Buchanan. Heidi's character
is “dangerous, cool and 24—a total femme fatale,”
she explains.
The real Heidi Mark is also 24, loyal, fiercely
independent and someone who, unlike Bebe,
would never ride some squirrelly gangster’s coat-
tails to the top. “I never want to rely on anybody
or anything,” she says.
We caught up with Miss July as she lounged in
her Santa Monica condo. She was in repose—but
studying Bebe's lines. “I'd rather work than rest,”
she asserts. Born in Ohio and raised in West Palm
Beach, Heidi has been a hurricane of activity
since arriving in Los Angeles a year ago. “I've
been lucky enough to have worked nonstop,” says
the former model and Hooters employee, rattling
"1 love, love, love, love men," Heidi stotes. "I've doted
ones who were short, toll, skinny ond chunky.” One of
those smart guys introduced her to PLAYBOY. "When |
looked at the photos, | thought, This is really pretty.”
PHOTOGRAPHY BY STEPHEN WAYDA
“I'm а sucker far lave,” Heidi admits. “I lave thot goofy feeling in my stomach. Someday I'd like
to have a close family.” Thase plans will have to wait. "Now my career is my number one prior-
ity,” she says. On о typical day she shuttles fram movie sets ta auditions to acting class. Recent
TV арреогопсез earned Heidi (right, in the blue leotard) o celebrity gig on American Gladiators.
off roles such as a recurring one
on The Young and the Restless and
guest spots on Baywatch, plus a
host of other TV shows and
movies.
Heidi keeps her personal life
low-key. “Everything here is
such a scene,” she says of L.A
“We rarely go out.” The “we
includes her current beau, for-
mer Motley Crue-man Vince
Neil. But Heidi chafes at the
notion that she’s one of those
models who dates only rock
stars. “I've been involved with a
policeman, a disc jockey, a con-
struction worker—people who
are worlds apart,” she says.
Despite her devotion to hard
work, Christianity and a mod-
est lifestyle, Heidi often seems
to find herself in the center ofa
scandal. At the age of four, she
shocked an audience with her
rendition of Away in a Manger in
her church's Christmas play. “1
was swaying my hips through
the whole song,” she recalls,
giggling. “I got into so much trouble!" More recently, the tabloids blared: GIRL-CRAZY OJ. CAR-
RIED ON PASSIONATE AFFAIR WITH PLAYBOY PINUP, “It's alll lies,” she says. “I can laugh atit now. But
it was really hard for me.” She despises traffic in Los Angeles, but otherwise Heidi says she
can't complain about her life in the fast lane. “It’s been an interesting 24 years,” she says. "I
can't wait to sce the next 24." We'll be watching, too. — MARK EHRNAN
One of Miss July's current
passions is reading books
about angels. “I really believe
in angels,” she says sheepish-
ly. So da we, Heidi, so do we
2
=
PLAYMATE DATA SHEET
МАМЕ:
BUST: QC WAIST:
ГА "n
HEIGHT: J 7 МЕТСНТ:
PEOPLE I ADMIRE:
A thy DA Kd
Placer ger 200 2
оч дало, S PED слао.
WORK ETHIC:
PLAYBOY’S PARTY JOKES
Im telling you, Jodi, I've never been happier,"
Carol told her friend. “I have two boyfriends.
One is just fabulous—handsome, sensitive,
caring and considerate.”
“What in the world do you need the second
one for?" Jodi asked.
“Oh,” Carol replied, “the second one is
straight.”
What happens when you put the batteries in
backward in the Energizer bunny? It just
keeps coming and coming and coming.
Р:лувох cuassıc: Hall and Stone, lawyers in
the same firm, had been bitter rivals for years,
aggressively competing against each other to
win a full partnership.
Walking home through the park one eve-
ning, Hall stumbled upon a bottle from which
a genie appeared. “I will grant you three wish-
c5," she said, “but I must warn you, whatever
you ask for will be given twice over to Mr.
Stone.”
Hall thought it over carefully. “OK, first I'd
like $5 million,” he said.
“No problem,” the genie said. “But remem-
ber, Mr. Stone will get $10 million.”
“Second, Га like а magnificent villa on the
French Riviera.”
“Granted,” the genic said. “But remember,
Mr. Stone will have two villas.”
“Yes, I know,” Hall said, “so for my last wish
1 want you to beat me half to death.”
Two nuns were driving down a country road
when a naked man jumped out in front of
them and began dancing lewdly. “What should
we do?” one sister frantically asked.
“Show him your cross,” the other said.
“Hey, mister.” the first nun yelled as she
rolled down the window, “get the fuck out of
my way.”
How many real estate agents does it take to
change a lightbulb? Ten, but we'll accept
eight.
А! complained to his friend Jeff that lovemak-
ing with his wife was becoming routine and
boring.
“Get creative, buddy. Break up the monoto-
пу. Why don’t you try playing doctor for an
hour?”
“Sounds great,” Al replied, “but how do you
make it last for an hour?”
“Hell, just keep her in the waiting room for
45 minutes.”
Concerned that her new 70-year-old husband
might need something to stimulate his sexual
appetite, the young woman consulted a physi-
cian. He prescribed a powerful drug that he
Ferkel ТОТ ete Sal ory
14 again.
The next day, she hid a pill in his eggs at
breakfast. When it seemed to have no effect,
she added two to his salad at lunch. When he
still showed no sexual interest, she popped
three into his stew at dinner. Much to her dis-
appointment, the old guy crawled into bed
that night and promptly fell into a deep sleep.
The next morning, the bride watched as her
husband got out of bed and began to dress.
“Honey” she purred, “why dont you come
over here and lie down next to те?
“I can't,” he said, pulling on his trousers.
“T'I be late for school.”
What's the hardest thing about sports to teach
a blonde? That a quarterback is not a tax
refund.
А New Yorker visiting old Tucson strolled in-
to a blacksmith's shop just after the smithy had
placed a red-hot horseshoe on a metal bench
to cool. Before he could be warned, the oblivi-
ous visitor picked up the shoe, then instantly
dropped it
“Are you badly burned?” the concerned
blacksmith asked.
“Nah,” the embarrassed tourist replied. “It
just doesn't take me very long to look at a
horseshoe.”
=)
Aline
What's the difference between a stagecoach
driver and a bartender? The driver has to look
at only six horses’ asses a day.
Tras MONTH'S MOST FREQUENT SUBMISSION: “Mr.
Quinn, I have reviewed this case very careful-
ly,” the divorce court judge said, “and I've de-
cided to give your wile $275 a week.”
“That's very fair, your honor,” the husband
said. "And every now and then I'll try to send
her a few bucks myself.”
Heard a funny one lately? Send it on a pos-
card, please, to Party jokes Editor, PLAYBOY,
680 North Lake Shore Drive, Chicago, Illinois
60611. $100 will be paid to the contributor
whose card is selected. Jokes cannot be returned.
‘Ahoy! Care to get blown off course?”
INEN is making a repeat рег-
formance this season as the
hottest choice for a cool sum-
mer look. No, we're not talk-
ing about the rumpled styles
your father wore. Today’s
linen has a smooth, subtle
finish that allows for only the slightest
crease. It's also versatile. Because linen
sports jackets and trousers are often sold
separately, you can wear the former as a
suit with a pair of matching trousers (as
we've done here) or tearn it with almost.
any style of lightweight pants or jeans.
We suggest starting with a three-button
single-breasted linen sports jacket in a
subtle color such as tan, muted blue or
pale yellow. For the office, loose-fitting
pleated trousers are considered more
polished, whereas plain-front pants are
the casual ideal. Asa rule of thumb when
wearing linen, keep the extras light.
Choose soft-collared sport shirts (or
camp or polo models if you're going ca-
sual) in colors that blend rather than
contrast. And complete the style picture
with a selection of solid-colored or slight-
ly patterned ties with surface luster, and
nubuck or woven oxfords or loafers.
Right: This lightweight linen look combines
о three-button single-breosted sports jocket
($575) ond motching double-pleated
trousers [$250], both by Colvin Klein Colloc
tion, with о heothery-soge linen shirt by Joseph
Abboud Collection (5145), а nubuck belt
by Bomeys New York ($55), o woven silk tie
by Best of Closs by Robert Talbott (595) ond
suede loofers by Hush Puppies (about $60).
THE
| INEN
LOOK
fashion by HOLLIS WAYNE
NO-SWELTER
STYLES FOR THE
LONG, HOT
SUMMER
Shodes of linen dressing. Neor right:
A three-button single-breasted sparts
jacket ($625) and matching trousers
($225) by Joseph Abboud Collection
are joined with a cation sport shirt
($105) and woven paisley-print silk
tie ($90) by Agnes b., a leather belt
by Tyrone Private Lobel ($150), wo-
ven roffic lace-up oxfords by To Boot
($165] and tortoise-frame sunglasses
from the Classic Collection by Revo
($195). For right: A three-bution sin-
gle-breasted jacket ($820) and
matching flat-front trousers ($255) by
Paul Smith, teamed with a cotton
shirt by Andrew Fezza Dress Shirt
($55), а woven silk muted-paisley-
print tie by Joseph Abboud Collectian
($65), nubuck oxfards by Giorgia Ar-
mani ($330) and pewter-frame sun-
glasses by Oliver Peoples (5260).
WHERE & HOW TO BUY ON PAGE 158.
GROOMING BY LOSI FOR PIERRE MICHEL,
THE PLAZA, NEW YORK CITY
PHOTOGRAPHY BY ANOREW ECCLES
PLAYBOY
102
ROAD TEST „аео
That impressed him. They checked into the hotel.
Donna was on first-name terms with the manager.
her he was planning to. Neither of
them suggested spending time togeth-
ег Donna didn’t even bother to find
out Pratt's profession or if he was
available.
That impressed him. Much about
her impressed him, which is why he de-
cided he wouldn't call until they were
back in New York. He didn’t want the
first intimate thing he found out about
her to be what kind of millstone she
was to travel with. They checked into
the hotel. Donna was on first-name
terms with the manager.
Pratt went to the British Museum
and was awed by the extent and quali-
ty of the collection and the scale of the
looting involved in assembling it. He
went to the National Portrait Gallery
and studied the faces of the officially
great Britons. He went to the Tower,
where some of them had been execut-
ed. Went to Westminster Abbey, where
a surprising number of them were
packed into the floors, walls and gar-
dens. He toured museums of new art
and old weapons. He attended Parlia-
ment and a club football match, where
the British gather to trade museum-
quality insults. He went to the track
and won some British money. He went
to Berry Brothers and invested it i
port. He went to the Royal Court The-
апе and bumped into Donna in the
lobby as the performance let out.
They had both enjoyed the produc-
tion, a science fiction revival of The Way
of the World. They went to a pub across
the square for pints of bitter and an
amiable disagreement about what the
director was trying to say by setting an
18th century comedy of manners on
Mars. Donna thonght it was a droll
comment on how remote the notion of
manners had become. Pratt thought it
was a droll comment on how Con-
greve's script was funny enough to sur-
vive a talented director with a daring
sense of design.
Two young British couples at the
next table invited themselves to join in
the debate. The conversation soon de-
volved into a speculation about what
the Hollywood version of The Way of
the World would be. Pratt had Mirabell
(Arnold Schwarzenegger) blowing his
way into a high-tech torture chamber
to rescue Millamant (Uma Thurman)
from her evil scientist billionaire sadist
spinster aunt (Robin Williams) when
the pub bell rang and the lights
went up.
As goodbyes were being exchanged
the less sober of the young women gave
Pratt an impulsive kiss on the cheek—
then blushed and apologized to Donna
for kissing “your husband.” Donna as-
sured her she wasn't the jealous type.
The young couples believed Donna.
So did Pratt.
They walked back to their hotel. The
night was idyllic—a crescent moon,
leafy streets lined with Georgian row
houses and lacking the stench, filth and
well-armed crackheads of Manhattan’s
upscale neighborhoods. Pratt and
Donna compared vacation scorecards.
Both were having 2 good time. Both
would be moving on in the morning.
Pratt was driving to Wales to do some
hiking. Donna recommended an inn
near Snowdonia. She too was heading
west, taking the train to Gloucester-
shire to visit ds. Pratt was tempted.
to offer her a ride. He gave in to the
temptation. Donna thanked him but
said she couldn't impose. They arrived
at the hotel. Pratt assured her it
wouldn't be an imposition, that it
would be good to have company along
in case he needed someone to change a
tire or walk five miles carrying a gas
can. Donna called him a shameless flat-
terer. They said goodnight and went to
their rooms. Eventually Pratt got him-
self to sleep.
The next morning Pratt picked up
his rental car and returned to the hotel
to check out. Donna was in the lobby
with her one piece of luggage. The
concierge was on the phone tying to
arrange alternate transportation for
her; what London lacked in Glock-tot-
ing junkies it made up for in Semtex-
toting IRA members, who had detonat-
ed a political statement in the train
station Donna had been planning to
leave from.
°
Blue skies and fine country roads.
An easy-fiowing conversation. Neither
volunteered much in the way of bio-
graphical detail. They discussed British
history. Differences between Brits and
Yanks and Aussies and Japanese in so-
cial situations. The distinctive psy-
choses of drivers in various countries.
Pratt wasn't surprised to find that Don-
na had traveled extensively.
She took him to lunch at a tearoom
in the Cotswolds. They didn’t talk
much. They were busy eavesdropping
on two women at the next table who
were dressed in unseasonably heavy
tweeds and dissecting in detail the per-
sonalitics, careers and living conditions
of the shelties one of them bred.
The women finished lunch and left.
Pratt grinned and was about to remark
that now he felt he was really in Eng-
land, but before he could speak Donna
deadpanned that now he was truly in
England.
When they got back to the car Pratt
asked Donna if she was bored riding
shotgun and would she like to drive.
She thanked him but pointed out it
would violate his rental agreement. He
tossed her the keys and got in the pas-
senger side. Donna said nothing but
looked pleased.
She drove like a champ. As he had
expected.
It was dusk when they arrived at her
friends’ house. It was a low, rambling
17th-18th-19th-20th century cottage
that sprawled along a thickly wooded
ridge, with the oldest rooms clustered
at the center and the additions stretch-
ing out to the left and right. А cozy
patchwork one story high and 350
years long.
Donna's friends, Dick and Chloe, in-
vited Pratt to stay for dinner. Pratt de-
murred. The iue was decided when
their five-year-old daughter request-
ed that Pratt stay long enough to read
her a chapter of her new book, and
her four-year-old brother immediately
counterattacked by tossing his stuffed
pig to Pratt, initiating a game of catch.
Pratt had no choice but to find a com-
fortable chair and do both at once. The
battle for possession of the newcomer
ended in a draw when the literary pig
throw was suspended by the arrival of
bedtime, at which point Chloe declared
dinner to be irreversibly under con-
struction and ordered Dick to begin
pouring cocktails into Pratt.
Dinner was a warm, sociable glow.
Charred chops and hefty rioja. Dick
and Chloe didn’t subject Pratt to the
clumsy grilling a strange man would
have gotten from a woman's friends in
the States. The conversation did sepa-
rate into man-man and woman-woman
(continued on page 106)
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PLAYBOY
106
ROAD T EST (continued from page 102)
He was in love. Not the rock-and-roll version he'd
felt for Suzie. The real thing. Love.
ghettos earlier and more thoroughly
than it would have ata New York table.
Donna and Chloe were old school
chums with six months of minutiae to
catch up on, which they turned to in
earnest as soon 25 they were satisfied
they could safely leave Pratt and Dick
to bond over current political outlooks
and past tastes in drugs and guitarists.
But each time Pratt glanced up, Donna
ог Chloe was glancing at him.
Over coffee Pratt asked them to rec-
ommend a hotel, but they all knew it
was a formality.
Then he and Donna were alone in
the drawing room. Dick and Chloe had
retired a few minutes earlier.
For the first time since they'd met,
they were carefully polite. They agreed
оп how lovely dinner had been, Donna
thanked Pratt for the drive out, Pratt
thanked Donna for introducing him to
her friends—anything to avoid ac-
knowledging the great viscous glob of
sensual tension that filled the space be-
tween them. Through it, Pratt could
feel her breasts pressing against him
from four feet away.
Pratt could also read the brief essay
in the look on her face. She was hoping
he wouldn't make her say out loud that
this was the wrong time and place. He
understood. He agreed. And even ifhe
didn't, he wasn't going to do anything
to disappoint this woman. After a small
silence he quietly said goodnight. She
gave him a light, grateful kiss on the
cheek and went off to bed.
Pratt's room had been built in the
1780s, Donna’s in the 1920s. The
rooms shared a wall but were 140 years
apart. Pratt tossed and turned for at
Teast that long before he drifted off.
Pratt was up early. Not as early as
Donna. She and Chloe had gone rid-
ing. Dick urged Pratt to stay until they
returned. Stay as long as he cared to, in
fact. Pratt thanked him but said he had
to go. Pratt traded phone, fax and ad-
dress data with Dick and hugs with the
kids, then hit the road.
Donna would appreciate why he left:
to give her time alone with her friends,
and to spare them both any more
nights on opposite sides of that fucking
antique wall that had probably been
built by some arrogant bastard using
profits squeezed out of brutally ex-
ploited colonials, probably in New
York— Now that was something to
look forward to. New York and Donna
and no wall. . , . Pratt noticed that the
terrain had become wilder and so had
the spelling on the road signs. He real-
ized he was in Wales and that he hadn’t
made a reservation at the inn Donna
had recommended. He stopped in a
town whose main drag wasn't as long as
the string of consonants that made up
its name. He phoned ahead and nailed
down the last available room.
He arrived at sunset. The inn was sit-
uated at the head of a long narrow val-
ley that was backlighted in bronze. A
slender lake was performing molten
Technicolor tricks along the valley
floor. The steep hillsides were carpeted
in lurid emerald greenery and dotted
with gold-pink-purple impressionist
sheep. Behind the inn rose а long-ex-
tinct volcano. All Donna had said was,
Nice place, good halemg.
True and true. The innkeepers were
a ruddy-cheeked old couple who wel-
comed Pratt effusively enough to qual-
ify them as honorary Italians. Dinner
was ambitious enough to have originat-
ed on the far side of the Channel as
well. Afterward in the lounge the other
guests went out of their way to include
the lone foreigner in their сопуегза-
tion. Pratt did his best to repay them
with the pleasant surprise of meeting
an American who was unassuming and
fluent in English. They were quite tak-
en with him. He wished that Donna
had seen it. He wondered what she
was doing.
The next day Pratt hiked up the
mountain and around the crater rim. A
beauty.
Pratt liked hiking alone. The soli-
tude, settings and endorphins put
things in perspective. As he sat on an
outcropping and watched the wind
rippling the long wild grass on the
slopes below, Pratt's perspective was
that he longed to trade his solitude and
endorphins for Donna. He wanted her
to be here. He wanted them to travel
everywhere and make love on volcanic
rims and have kids who'd be best
friends with Dick and Chloe's kids. He
was in love. Not the close-enough-for-
rock-and-roll version he'd felt for
Suzie. The real thing. Love. This was
not some endorphin-glow delusion.
This had been there long before the
hike, it had been going оп. . . continu-
ously since that little grin and the
earplugs. Love. Christ. Thirty-nine
fucking years old and he's first-time,
full-tilt, chest-pang loony in love. Не
wondered how foolish it was to feel this
way about someone he hadn’t slept
with. Maybe it wouldn't be so great.
He doubted that. Donna was good at
things. He looked forward to finding
out. He would make it his life’s work.
When Pratt came down off the
mountain he found Donna in a mead-
ow behind the inn, tossing a stick for
the innkeepers’ aged retriever. Pratt
tried to find something amusingly
adult to say. He settled for not running
up to her, kissing her and flinging her
to the ground. He walked up to her,
kissed her and took her to his room.
Their room.
Sex and hiking and sex and eating
and sex and a castle and sex in Wales. A
rainy weekend in Bath, museums dur-
ing the day, pubs and dancing at night,
urgent squirming in the car on a coun-
try lane with a downpour drumming
on the sheet metal like the ghost of
Keith Moon. Liquids, liquids. The surf
licking the cliffs on the Cornwall coast.
A night of serious drinking followed by
serious rug burns when they couldn't
make it all the way from the door to the
bed. A long drive east to Cambridge to
do the cornball tourist thing, punting
on the Cam. Worth it. But the clock
was running. Tomorrow would be one
last day together in London. Morning
after that Donna’s plane would take
her away.
They dawdled in the huge clawfoot
tub in their Cambridge hotel. Finally
Pratt got out, brought the phone over
and got back in. He began to call the
hotel in London, the one in South
Kensington where they had stayed
separately at the start of the trip. Don-
na stopped him; she wanted to stay
someplace else. Pratt sensed the South
Ken place had other memories at-
tached and Donna didn't want to play
mix and match. Pratt didn't ask. Donna
hadn't talked about her love life and
hadn't inquired about his. Pratt was
OK with that. The past could wait. The
future too. Pratt was living totally in
the now, something he had experi-
enced before only when clinging to a
rock wall or when being bashed around
(concluded on page 144)
nent or diversion; amusement, Sport; Irolic.
PLAYBOY.
ala'bo1). 1. A sporty fellow bent upon
eee seeking; a man-about-town;
. lover of life; а bon vivant. 2. The $ =
nagazine edited for the edification and enter-
ainment of urban men; i.e., in the June issue:
You Can Make a Million Today” by J. Paul
xetty; a psychological portrait of Reno by
Ierbert Gold; five pages of color photography
n the Grand Prix 1n Monaco with description
y Charles Beaumont; cartoonist Shel Silver-
tein visits Hawaii.-played out (plad out),
p. Performed to the end; also, exhausted; used
p.—player (pla'er), n. One who plays; an ac-
ог; а musician. —playful (pla'fool; -f1), adj.
‘ull of play; sportive; also, humorous —play-
nate (pla^mat), n. A companion
a play.—Playmate (Pla’mät)),
. A popular pictorial feature in
LAYBOY magazine depicting
eautiful girl i in pin-up pose; shor-
ening of “Playmate of the
Tonth”; ie, Austrian beauty
leidi Becker in June issue;
ence, without cap., any very
ttractive female companion to a
layboy.—playock (pla'ük), п *
Prob. dim. of play, n.] Бы. FS een
cot. —playoff (pla’6f’), п. Sports. A final con-
MISS JUNE 1961. Our cover, a playful nod to Noah Web-
ster, proved that PLAYBOY belonged in any sophisticated
man's vocabulary. Hef and Art Director Arthur Paul de-
signed the "dictionary cover" to look like the real thing. It
characterized a playboy as a lover of life, and we'll stick with
that definition today. The Playmate in that issue was the al-
ready well-defined Heidi Becker. Heidi played the cameo
role on the cover as а reminder that words sometimes fail us.
CI ш ш и иш
“Т knew your parties were the talk of Savannah, Lady Vandiver, but
until now I never knew why.”
103
110
article by CRAIG VETTER
ANOTHER Day at the office for Liz
Masakayan and Karolyn Kirby, and they
look a little tired. It’s 8:30 on a Sunday
morning at the end of August. Their mo-
tel wake-up call was late, so they had to
hurry breakfast, hustle to the grandstand
court on Manhattan Beach in Los Ange-
les, peel down to two-piece swimsuits,
slather themselves with sunscreen and,
against a light breeze, under perfect sun-
shine, start bumping a volleyball back
and forth to each other. They are warm-
ing up for their semifinal match in the
Reebok Nationals, the finale of the Wom-
en’s Professional Volleyball Association
tour. Across the net, Dennie Shupryt-
Knoop and Deb Richardson are working
on their serves.
On the promenade above the beach
volleyball courts, three sailors in starched
whites have stopped to watch. “Major
babe alert,” says one of them as they gawk
with shameless delight at the four beauti-
ILLUSTRATION BY DENNIS MUKAI
they spike. they kill.
they wear ads on their
bikini bottoms. but how else
can you make a good
living on the beach?
SLLYBALL
SDDESSES
ful, nearly naked women who are about
to go to work. I eavesdrop as the men ar-
gue their preferences according to body
type and hair color. The options before
the sailors are all appealing: Masakayan,
dark and exotic, 5'8”; Shupryt-Knoop,
blonde, athletically compact; Kirby, a
beautifully proportioned 5'11”, also with
blonde hair; and Richardson, a lean and
stretchy 61“.
A few minutes later, as the game starts,
Kirby stops the sailors’ beauty-contest
patter dead by skying off the sand to
spike a ball (it's about the size of a man's
head) with an explosive force that has to
remind them of gunnery practice. The
courtside spectators turn their chairs
over to get out of the way of the vicious
blast. The sailors look at one another as if
they've just seen Shaq jam one. They
laugh, exchange low fives and make their
way onto the sand and into the grand-
stand to watch the rest of the game. Kirby
and Masakayan (continued on page 124)
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112
Full here Rising
A COUPLE OF Hours before the
sight of his naked, middle-aged
fanny began filling television
screens across America, Dennis
character. It’s rare to see a man
РЕАУВОУ РВОЕ! ЕЕ ДЕ age, wich his outward gruff-
ness, act in that sort of manner.”
Yet for all that, it was Franz’ be-
Franz sat in his trailer on the BY STEVE ONEY hind that would tonight be ex-
Twentieth Century Fox lot in Los
Angeles replaying a cassette of the soon-to-air
footage. The actor had filmed the scene without
makeup after convincing himself that a tiny scar
from a spider bite was dramatically plausible. (His
character, Detective Andy Sipowicz, had been shot
in the wallet in NYPD Blue's pilot episode.) But
now that the moon, so to speak, would soon be ris-
ing, Franz was less sure, and he kept scrutinizing
the image of his nether region, searching for that
pinprick ofred until the absurdity of it all dawned
оп him and he asked: “What kind of guy am I? I've.
got a beautiful woman in the shower with me, and
I'm rewinding the tape to look at my ass?”
The woman was Sharon Lawrence, who in the
role of Sylvia Costas shares this moment with
Sipowicz, baring not just her own derriere but an
area of her lover's psyche that has long been off-
limits. At first, Sipowicz tries to push Costas away,
protesting: “I usually shower alone.” Then, when
she not only persists but also begins sudsing what
can only be his most private parts, he flat-out
balks: “Whoa, whoa. 1 usually wash myself down
there.” Finally, however, he submits, allowing ten-
tatively: “Boy, that'll sure be clean.”
As Sipowicz’ lines suggest, his character’s nudity
is almost secondary to something else, a story that
has been unfolding on NYPD Blue since it pre-
miered in September 1993, the story of a1
cop recovering elements of his humanity.
wicz hadn't been devoid of sex in the past” noted
Franz, “but those were financial transactions.
When he wanted it, he paid for it. Last year, he ad-
mitted he hadn't had sex sober in 20 years. Now,
he’s having to learn how to play, to be naughty—
like an adolescent. That's part of the charm of his
posed before a nationwide televi-
sion audience. He was understandably thinking
less about Andy Sipowicz’ demons than about the
fact that he was joining an exclusive club, the
handful of TV actors—most of them courtesy of
NYPD Blue—who've revealed on camera as much
of their anatomy as network strictures allow. Call it
full dorsal nudity. On the one hand, he was flat-
tered that someone might want to see his less-than-
svelte self in the altogether. “Back when we were
conceiving the show,” he remarked, “1 was asked if
Thad any qualms, and I said, ‘If they want to see it,
they're welcome.” By the same token, however, he
was aware that he was opening himself to ridicule,
confiding: "I know that my friends, my family, my
loved ones—people I don't ordinarily show my
rear end to—are going to see it. 1 imagine tomor-
row I'm going to be the rear end of a lot of jokes."
With that, Franz emerged from his trailer, which
is moored next to the soundstage that houses
NYPD Blue's sets, and stepped across the lot to the
space where his Jaguar was parked. АЙ he could do
now was await the outcome at home.
Predictably, the calls started coming the next
he’s not handsome, hip or sexy. how did dennis franz become the molten soul of nypd blue?
morning, yet the day was nearly over before the
rump roast commenced in earnest. As it hap-
pened, it was Thanksgiving eve, and Franz and his
longtime inamorata, Joanie Zeck, were up baking,
the TV tuned to The Tonight Show. when Jay Leno
plunged into his opening monolog.
“So, Dennis Franz bared his butt on NYPD Blue,”
Leno began.
Pause. Then: “Did they think we needed to see
that before Thanksgiving? I guess a lot of people
won't be eating white meat.”
Laughter, Encore: “Franz intended this as a
ILLUSTRATION BY OAVID LEVINE
No
\
| ү
M 7
np р y
PLAYBOY
114
public service ad: This is your butt.
This is your butt on Twinkies.”
Like Leno’s studio audience, Franz
and Zeck found this to be genuinely
amusing. For an actor, Franz is surpris-
ingly devoid of vanity, and he appre-
ciated the broad comedic target his
posterior offered. Which was lucky.
‘The episode scored one of the best rat-
ings in NYPD Blue history, making it
the week's fifth-highest-rated show and
meaning that 16.7 million households,
more than a fourth of the viewing au-
dience, had seen Franz’ buns of molten
steel au naturel.
That it would be the unveiling of
Dennis Franz’ bottom—and not that of
his decidedly more buff former side-
kick, David Caruso, or present partner,
Jimmy Smits—that sent NYPD Blue's
Nielsens through the roof seems, at
first blush, astonishing. As Franz will
willingly confess, he’s not exactly mati-
nee idol material.
Fifty years old, weighing 210
pounds, and standing just over 5111”,
Franz is the very picture of a Rust Belt
man. Though he doesn’t carry much
fat, his physique can best be described
as lumpy, and he admits that when it
comes to dieting, the most he ever does
is “occasionally pass up a doughnut.”
(Indeed, in contrast to the preparation
of other actors, Franz didn't try to get
in shape before his NYPD Blue nude
scene.) Then there's the mug—bald-
ing, of course, and jowly, with 2 beak
of а nose, mustache and cartoon eye-
brows. To learn that Franz was born
Dennis Schlachta in an ethnically bal-
kanized Chicago suburb (his stage name,
which rhymes with prawns, was his fa-
ther’s first name) comes as no surprise.
But whether he looks the part or not,
Dennis Franz is a star, a sex symbol
even, who receives indecent proposals
in his fan mail, is accorded “heart-
throb” status by the National Enquirer
and pops up on the cover of People
magazine's Valentine's Day issue. And
not only that, there has been excep-
tional critical acclaim. For his work on
NYPD Blue, Franz took home both the
1994 Emmy and the 1995 Golden
Globe for best actor in a dramatic tele-
vision series.
The reasons for Franz’ success are
many. For starters, he’s a legitimately
skilled performer. Steven Bochco, who,
along with David Milch, created and
produces NYPD Blue, has been using
Franz ever since he cast him as the
fiendish Sal Benedetto in Hill Street
Blues 13 years ago. Bochco speaks of
Franz’ “big, big engine" and his "metic-
ulous” work habits, Then there's the
fact that NYPD Blue was basically writ-
ten for Franz. “When David and I con-
ceived the show,” recalls Bochco, “the
first thing I did was hire Dennis. We
didn’t even have a script.” Yet finally,
there’s something else, something spe-
cific to Franz as a man.
Spend time around those who know
Franz and they will invariably volun-
teer that he’s that rarest of items, a vir-
tuous soul. Bochco, who's not the sort
to sing false praises, vows: “He has
a genuinely good heart. He's fiercely
ethical. That's what I respond to. My
dad was that way.” David Milch echoes
this sentiment: "Den: а gentle-
man—civil and sweet-spirited.” Actor
Joe Mantegna, whose friendship with
Franz dates back to when they started
out together in Chicago theater in the
early Seventies, goes even further: "If T
had to choose three human beings to
watch my backside if such an occasion
arose, Dennis would be one of them.
It's that Midwestern mentality—no
pretense, no hidden agendas. You al-
ways know where you stand with Den-
nis. If he's your friend, Нез your
friend.”
Considering that acting is a profes-
sion dependent on artifice, the link be-
tween Franz’ decency and his power
on-screen тау seem unclear—but not
to Bochco. “To use Milch’s word,” he
says, “there's an interesting ‘double-
ness’ about Dennis. You're always at-
tracted to his blue-collar toughness.
But inevitably, as his characters pro-
gress, his goodness begins to emerge
through that blue-collar toughness.”
It's this inner aura, Bochco believes,
that draws viewers to the outwardly re-
pugnant Andy Sipowicz. “In Sipowicz,
we've created a very edgy character, in
many ways a bigot, loaded with biases.
But endlessly leaking through the
cracks of that facade is Dennis’ good-
ness. The trap for us as writers, in fact,
is not to give in to it. It’s important to
take Sipowicz back to that darker side.”
The dark side, of course, is from
whence Sipowicz sprang in all his glory
in NYPD Blue's pilot. Alcoholic, misogy-
nistic and armed, Sipowicz announced
himself to the world—and to Costas,
the assistant D.A. who later becomes
his lover—by grabbing his crotch and
snarling: "Ipso this, you pissy little bitch.”
And it is the dark side that has ii
formed countless subsequent Sipowi
outbursts. Not since Archie Bunker has
anyone voiced as many insulting or off-
color sentiments in prime time. But
whereas Bunker delivered them in the
form of armchair rants, Sipowicz serves
them in your face.
During the course of NYPD Blue's
two seasons, Sipowicz has unleashed a
number of memorable verbal sallies.
Some are shots across the bow of polite
sensibility. For instance, his crack to an
aging, gay screenwriter who wanted
him to estimate the value of an Acade-
my Award statue stolen by some rough
trade: “Мг Rickman, Га love to sit
here with you figuring out what some-
one would pay to whip his skippy while
he looks at your Oscar, but we're могі
ing a multiple homicide right nov."
Likewise, his crack to a wife-killing chi-
ropractor who asked about Sipowicz
bad back: “Maybe I can get over it
thinking of you in Ossining getting
acupuncture up your dirt chute.” Oth-
ers, however, are blows at political cor-
rectness, particularly a tirade he un-
leashed at an obdurate black man
named Futrel who believed he was be-
ing interrogated in a murder investiga-
tion solely because of his skin color:
sirowicz: “Hey, pal, I'm trying
to find some assholes before they
murder another innocent family.
It so happens that these particular
assholes are black. Now, how do
you want me to go about this? You
want me to put the questions, “I’m
sorry for the injustices the white
man has inflicted upon your race,
but can you provide any informa-
tion? I'm sorry your people have
been downtrodden for 300 years,
but did you discuss the layout of
the Sloan house with any of your
friends?"
TUTREL: “Yeah. Do it that way.”
sırowicz: “OK. I know that
great African American George
Washington Carver discovered
the peanut, but can you provide
the names and addresses of these
friends?”
Like Bochco says, there's not a lot on
the surface to love. And yet the audi-
ence loves Sipowicz, and that it does
is a testimony to Franz. Admittedly,
NYPD Blue's writers have endowed
Sipowicz with enough saving grace to
give the actor a starting place. How
could a hardened cop -who collects
tropical fish not tug at heartstrings?
And the romance between Sipowicz
and Costas has softened a few edges.
But finally, it's Franz who furnishes the
transformative magic. “The dimension
and subtlety and depth Dennis brings
to that character are something to see,”
says David Milch, who scripts the bulk
of Sipowicz dialogue.
To illustrate his point, Milch de-
scribed a moment he witnessed when
NYPD Blue was filming in New York. In
the episode, Sipowicz probes the sex-
ual violation and murder of an immi-
grant boy as he comes to grips vith the
distance between himself and his es-
tranged son. During the course of his
(continued on page 156)
“Stop being so gender specific!”
лт р" t
|
JENNIFER COMPTON 5’
at long last, a tribute to small wonders
N DEPARTMENT STORES, they're called petites. In school-
yards, they're short stuff. In the business world, they're
little dynamos. At amusement parks, they're “below
this line,” in Texas, they're little ladies and in bed,
they're, well, highly mobile. But have you ever heard one
described with the kinds of adjectives—statuesque, strik-
ing, bombshell—heaped on the Naomi Campbells and
Christy Turlingtons of the world? Not likely. Face it, in this
bigger-is-better era, little women tend to get short shrift
Until now. “We were talking about the hundreds of picto-
rials we've done in the past,” says PLAYBOY Senior Photo Ed-
itor Jim Larson, “and we suddenly realized that we'd
somehow overlooked petite women. We knew we had to fix
that.” Larson put the word out, and before you could say
Lilliputian, an army of bantam beauties lit upon the
PLAYBOY shores. “The truth is, they were all completely
adorable,” Larson recalls. “But they were also extremely
sexy.” Think he's telling you a tall tale? Look for yourself.
Jennifer Compton (ot left and above) is an Ohio native who now lives in Florida, where she manages o lingerie boutique. Her size is
not on indicator of her ambition. She comes from a “strong, successful, hordworking family"—and intends to keep that legacy alive.
PHOTOGRAPHY BY RICHARD FEGLEY
REBECCA FURMAN 5’3” a RACHEL FURMAN 5'3*
ive duo is borely on arm's length toller than, say, the 76ers’ Shawn Bradley. But they're twin towers of energy. Both like ta wo-
i, and while Rebecca dreams cf winding up on MTV, Rachel wants to “travel, experience new things and make it big.” Belaw is Emi-
ly Prince, a waitress and madel from California. A lover of cowboys, old movies, springtime and country living, Emily hopes one day ta
have her own ranch. Fellow Golden Stater Tonya Watts (aiming for the stars, apposite) trekked west from Alabama to make a splash in
TONYA WATTS 5'1*
KRISTEN LEE
52"
- ELIZABETH WILLIAMS 5/3”
"| love dimples ond a greot smile,” says y Ciccarelli (at
left), a mail-order entrepreneur from the r dream
man? The somewhat taller Brad Pitt. Elizabeth Williams
(above) hails from Texas, where she has gone into Dod's busi-
ness—selling cars (compacts, по doubt). Chicago's Kristen
Lee (below) plans a career in physical therapy—or showbiz.
2777
Г
&
р
à
|
|
MELISSA MARKS 5’ y
Melissa Marks (abave) wos а competitive ice skater, but now the
transplanted Texan lives on the West Coast and langs to be с writer.
April Waddell (right) was born in Georgia and now warks as a
nursing assistant in Washington State. Off-haurs you can find April
skiing. Philippines-born Jecniffer Vuylsteke (below) waits tables at a
sports bar. Her gaal is to be “a successful businesswoman and wife.”
JEANIFFER VUYLSTEKE 5’
BONNY GIROUX 5'2*
Canadian Bonny Giroux (above) likes bubble baths and Italian food. "My family and I have lived in a nudist colony for nine years,” she
says. "And during my high school years, | lived with nuns.” Alicia Zepp (below) is an Alabama homemaker who fancies swimming with dol-
phins and men in tight Levi's. Her big plans: "to have с log cabin on 20 acres of land.” Finally, meet Shannon Leahy (opposite), a madel
and part-time carpenter from New York. Shannon and all the rest should take comfort in the thaught that it’s a small world, after all.
ALICIA ZEPP 5'1*
| SHANNON LEAHY 5'2*
PLAYBOY
124
VELLEY BALL uou
"I brought dinner to them, and Karolyn was naked
on the massage table. They told me to come in.”
overcome their morning fatigue and
take care of business in a hard-serving,
sand-crashing, 15-9 win.
“I'm not sure what men expect when
they come to a tournament,” says Kirby
after the match. “They may come for
the bikinis, but they stay for the com-
petition, and they go away with re-
spect. When it's over, they know that
what they've seen out here are not
your average women.”
That's putting it mildly. These
women were scholar-athletes in col-
lege, and they have the strength and
stature that goes with the title. Most of
them hold other, full-time jobs—there
are lawyers, personal trainers, entre-
preneurs, real estate agents, inter-
preters, accountants, volleyball coach-
es, mechanical engineers, restaurant
managers, actresses, teachers and city
planners on the tour—and many have
young children.
Dennie Shupryt-Knoop, 2 39-year-
old who runsa business from her home
in Los Angeles, survived southern Cal-
ifornia’s November 1993 wildfires, the
January 1994 earthquake and the
postfire mudslides. She gave birth toa
daughter on February 11, 1994 and
ten weeks later took fourth place with
Deb Richardson in the Reebok Fort
Lauderdale Open. Other than that,
she's just out there getting a good tan,
playing a game that most people think
of as something to do until the burgers
are finished grilling.
Beach volleyball began in California
in the Fifties as casual pickup games
on improvised courts at Malibu, State
Beach and Laguna. Back then the seri-
ous athletes played for beach chairs
and beer; the rest of us wandered into
the games for something to do when
we weren't surfing or swimming or fry-
ing on the sand. It was a gentler game
then—like basketball before the
dunk—and because most colleges had
volleyball programs for women but not
for men, the women in the beach
games were often the only ones with
any real hitting skills, finesse or sense
of strategy.
Amateur tournaments sprang up
along the coast in the Sixties and early
Seventies, and by 1976 the level of play
among the men was high enough to
attract sponsorship for the first pro-
fessional contest ever, in Pacific Pal-
isades—total prize money $5000. Since
then, the men's tour, under the aus-
Pices of the Association of Volleyball
Professionals, has exported this little
piece of the California dream to cities
all over the country, where it plays to
hundreds of thousands of fans, and оп-
to television, where it has grown into
а sophisticated marketing entity that
in 1994 attracted enough sponsorship
money and TV revenues to offer a
prize kitty of more than $4 million.
The Women’s Professional Volleyball
Association, organized ten years after
the men’s tour, played the season for a
total purse of slightly more than
$600,000, the highest ever,
Money, of course, has changed the
game, but it hasn't changed the scene
much. The beach at Manhattan is still a
gorgeous swath, stretching north into
the luminous glow where the bright
sun hits the Los Angeles smog, and
south to Hermosa and the ragged blue
clifftops of Palos Verdes. By midmorn-
ing on Sunday of the WPVA final, the
promenade above the beach is a river
of walking, jogging, skating, biking
flesh and summer colors. The grand-
stand around center court is full, and
the beach is standing-room-only all the
way to the tents representing the com-
mercial tribes that sponsor the wom-
en's tour: Reebok, Coors Light, Killer
Loop sunglasses, Chevrolet, Naya (“the
goddess of bottled waters”). Admission
to WPVA tournaments is free. Spon-
sors pay expenses, put up prize money
and give away towels, water bottles and
other beach paraphernalia in the hope
they'll become logo-linked with this
lifestyle sport, as the marketing people
call it.
Just before 11 A... CBS cameramen
take their places to prepare for a live
national telecast, while the master of
ceremonies introduces the finalists:
Barbra Fontana, born in Manhattan
Beach, is 56” and one of the tour's
great defensive players. She’s 29 years
old and works as a lawyer. In 1994 she
was president of the player-governed
WPVA. Her partner, Lori Kotas-
Forsythe, is 61” and 36 years old. She's
a durable player who ranks seventh on
the list of all-time tour money-winners.
The team of Barbra Fontana and Lori
Kotas-Forsythe had two tournament
wins in 1994.
Unfortunately for them, they are
competing against Liz Masakayan and
Karolyn Kirby, who have won each of
the ten previous competitions they en-
tered this year. Masakayan—who goes
by the nicknames Flyin’ Masakayan
and the Lizard—is quick, powerful, in-
tense. Now 30 years old, she was а two-
time UCLA all-American and member
of the 1988 Olympic indoor team, and
she is second on the WPVAS list of
career money-winners. Her partner,
Karolyn Kirby, has yet to acquire a
nickname, but who needs one when
everybody calls you “the best woman to
ever play the sport”? At 34 years old,
she is first in nearly every category for
which women's volleyball keeps statis-
tics, including wins and earnings. She
is a huge hitter and has battered her
way to league MVP honors five of the
past six seasons.
“Partnership is everything in this
game,” says Kirby when I question the
two of them about their slamming suc-
cess. “Liz and I fit together quite well.
We both like living on the edge, we're
spontaneous, we don’t like to be bored.
Our style is physical, powerful and
graceful. And we can say things on
the court in the heat of the game with-
ош causing each other to get weird or
defensive.”
“Trust, loyalty, communication, ma-
turity,” says Masakayan, summing up
die strengdis of the шаш. “And hard
work.”
“What about life on the tour other
than volleyball?" 1 ask.
"What life?” says Masakayan, and
they both laugh.
“You have to pick your spots,” says
Kirby. “It takes a lot of energy to sight-
see or go to dinner with people when
you're exhausted, you have an 8 л.м.
match and a pulled muscle you have to
spend the night working on.”
I tell them that I know something
about their massage-table moments.
Tm staying in the same hotel they are,
and on my first morning there, the
room-service waiter, Tony, brought my
breakfast and said, “Do you know
who's in the room across the hall?
Karolyn Kirby and Liz Masakayan."
He paused for my acknowledgment,
then dropped his voice and said, “Yes-
terday afternoon I brought dinner to
them, and Karolyn was naked on a
massage table." He savored this a mo-
ment, then quickly added, “They told
me to come in."
Kirby and Masakayan laugh at the
story and bat it back and forth between
them.
"Oh yes, come in, Tony, come in,"
says Masakayan.
“Here's the oil, Tony,” counters Kir-
by. “Let me show you how this is done.”
(continued on page 146)
“Hello, intensive care? Mr. Thompson here at 1500 feet having an out-of-body experience.”
PHOTOGRAPHY BY JAMES IMBROGNO
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вт.
А sa child growing up on the New Jer-
sey shore, Kurt Loder would tuck a ra-
dio under his pillow at night and tune in to
a Tennessee radio station that played black
music. "It was like something from another
planet,” he remembers. “A planet you would
like to visit and perhaps establish residency
on. Pue been able to do that.”
MTV's news anchor, who presides over
“Day in Rock” and ils longer weekend edi-
tion, “Week in Rock,” is hardly a creature of
television. After serving as an Army jour-
nalist in Europe, Loder remained an expa-
triale before returning to the U.S. to write
about music—his passion—for small rock
magazines. A nine-year stint at “Rolling
Stone” followed. His fascination with the
sounds of Memphis and the Mississippi
Delia served Loder well. He collaborated
with Tina Turner on her autobiography, “I,
Tina,” which inspired the hit film "What's
Love Got to Do With It.”
Despite a bad attitude and what he insists
is problem һай, Loder was recruited by an
MTV vice president looking to expand the
network's programming beyond rock videos.
His stock in trade is reporting on rock and
zoll and the not always unrelated issues of
politics, race and freedom of speech. Last
year he wrote and reported “Straight Dope,”
MTV's hour-long special on the drug prob-
lem. He has also
d guided viewers on
MIV's news Fr, шш
Madonna's ward-
anchor ar- — 77 (lingerie т-
cluded) while she
gues that was shooting her
rockis not 7220422
in Spain.
ion- Warren Kalback-
revolution- Haren Kalbach
i for several hours.
ary, spills He reporis: “Loder
had a lot to get off
the beans his chest about such
minor topics as mu-
on tabitha sic, culture and tele-
soren and vision. Of course,
ту first question
predicts the ае аа”
inevitability Ъ
PLAYBOY: What's
of penis the latest on sex,
^ drugs and rock
trading and roll?
LODER: Sex has
cards not gone away.
It's still here and
people are still
having it. Not in
PHOTOGRAPHY BY DAVIO ROSE
my bailiwick recently. Kids are listening
to hard-core metal and rap that's as
violent as possible. When you are а
kid, you're angry. So you want to see
somebody get offed. When we were
younger, we just wanted to get a date,
but now they want to see the bitch
killed. Don't you wish you were young
now? I could really get into it. My son
has a difficult time because I'm often
turning him on to records. He would
like to shock me, but it's hard. The idea
of rock and roll—being 15 years old
and wanting to get fucked up and go
wild—always made perfect sense to me.
Then you wind up middle-aged with
some of the world’s worst habits.
a:
PLAYBOY: From the vantage of a rock-
and-roll historian, what's your take on
rockers’ ability—or lack thereof—to
handle fame and fortune?
LODER: It’s changed. Kurt Cobain was а
really talented guy who felt burdened
by fame. This is the new generation
of kids—the sensitive generation. The
older guys weren't like that at all. They
wanted to be famous. They wanted the
money, the drugs, the sex. And they
got it. They still have it. And they have
much younger wives. You can’t imag-
ine Mick Jagger killing himself because
he was too famous. That just wouldn't
have happened.
3.
PLAYBOY: As MTV’s news anchor, do
you feel you're accorded the respect
due a broadcast journalist with a na-
tional audience?
LODER: They pay me every two weeks.
That's pretty much what we ask, right?
I work. You pay me. Dan Rather and
those guys are real reporters. I'm not
telegenic, but we worked on that. A
monkey can do this. You just get com-
fortable so you don’t look like you're in
pain, which tends to put people off. 1
learned journalism in the Army. The
Army taught us journalism in two
months. That's a little too long because
the basics of journalism take a month
to learn. It’s amazing to me that you
can study television in college. What do
you study? What would you know at
the end of the course? 1 don't get it,
Сай me old-fashioned.
4.
PLAYBOY: Do you advise MTV viewers
to supplement your news coverage
o ase the th 48
with C-Span, subscriptions to The Econ-
omist and Foreign Affairs and the study
of Richard Nixon's postpresidential
writings?
LODER: I generally don't tell people
what to do. But if you're getting all
your news from television, you're not
getting the news. You can’t be well-in-
formed without print. In fact, print is
the source of all the stories you see on
television. Television is good at imme-
diacy, but the depth of coverage that
you get from print will never be dupli-
cated. It won't be replaced, either. The
other day ata Rolling Stones press con-
ference, some guy from one of the net-
works asked me what [ thought. And 1
said, “It just proves that you can take
lots of drugs and have lois of sex and
sull be making money at the age of 50.”
And the guy said, "I don't think that's
the message we want го send.” I said,
“When did news become a matter of
the message we want to send? I
thought it was the facts we wanted to
send.” So the idea that people in televi-
sion are Curators of journalistic ethics is
true. Thank Cod for print. To me that's
real journalism. If you're not reading,
you're not informed. Even if you're lis-
tening to me.
5.
PLAYBOY: Tell us something surprising
about your colleague Tabitha Soren.
LODER: She has a deep punk-rock back-
ground. I hesitate to go further.
There's nothing scandalous, but she
has a real music background. She was a
fan and she's nota fake. Her real name
is Sorenberger, and I think it's Norwe-
gian. One of those Scando countries.
She's great. 1 love Tabitha. Very smart,
very ambitious, very sweet. Real cute.
She's 27 now. Wow! She's sprouted
right up. She really researches her
stuff. She's better than most of the peo-
ple we see on networks. I guess we'd
have to say she's a credit to her genera-
tion. That's a terrible thing to say.
6.
PLAYBOY: Comment on rock and roll as
a revolutionary movement.
LODER: Rock and roll was never revolu-
tionary. There was nothing done in
rock and roll that hadn't been done by
R&B. The great thing about early rock
and roll is chat it created a new social
mixture of black and white people.
Rock and roll was a new way of looking
at the world and saying black people
129
РЕАУВОУ
have great talents and are pretty cool.
Some white people thought they would
like to be black. 1 remember feeling that
way. It’s a shame to see that breaking
down now. Yet the biggest audience for
rap is white kids with their baseball caps
on backward. Rap brings races together
without preaching. You hear this music
and you say, “That's cool.” I’m white, but
Га like to be cool anyway and escape be-
ing just a white person. Perhaps we were
allowed to become white with soul or as-
Pirations to soul. And our lives were
much improved by it. You can't believe a
word Jesse Helms says after you've
heard Otis Redding. You just can't.
The
PLAYBOY: Is rock and гой humanity's last
best hope?
Lover: For me it was everything in life
you wanted to be. Anybody who grew up
in the Fifties or early Sixties remembers
how dull and preposterous those times
were. I wanted to cut loose and do things
the beatnik guys were doing. The beat-
niks were really cool, but they didn't
have rock and roll. They had jazz. Jazz is
good, but you can't dance to it. So rock
and roll was perfect. It was stupid, it was
universal and it was brilliant and beauti-
ful. Doo-wop songs are beautiful. Lowe
Louie 15 beautiful. 1 think the FBI studied
it for a while. If you can picture those
guys sitting around listening to it. The
words are easily available, but in the
recording done by the Kingsmen, no
one could understand what was going
on. Not even the guys who were singing
it. Itcould have been dirty. Can we imag-
ine a time when people cared? It was a
much more innocent ume. I’m sure
there are conservatives who wish we had
Louie Louie back again and that Dr. Dre
and Snoop Doggy Dogg were some-
where else.
I РЕ
“Thanks. Му wife's breathing
appears to be normal now. . . . I said, my
wife's breathing. . .
. I said... . Hey!”
8.
PLAYBOY: You've said that Tina Turner
changed your life. Describe what she did
for you.
LODER: I was a white kid growing up
among white people—this is like 1960.
Ike and Tina records had come out and
this stuff was just pow! Recorded on one
mike and in one take. It was so hot. It
just spoke of another world, to a white
kid surrounded by people in lime green
polyester clothes, drinking scotch. And it
made you want to go out and find it. It
changed my life. Music really shaped my
life. Without music, what would I be?
Tina's an incredible force. I don't think
she realizes how powerful that gift is
when she sings. The first thing 1 said
when I met her was, “I love those early
records. They are brilliant.” But she told
me she hated singing those—she
thought it was screeching. My heart was
broken. She hated working with Ike
Turner. We were going to do this book
and she had forgotten her life story, just
blotted the whole thing out of her mind.
She'd forgotten who was in the bands
and what they did. So to re-create the
story, 1 wound up trudging through Mis-
sissippi, finding old saxophone players
who were out fishing. Tina was really in-
spired by white people, which is the oth-
er side of the rock-and-roll dream. And
she was the first to say that the white
people she worked with gave her an idea
that there was a world of class and man-
ners. And now she lives in the south of
France. So she got where she wanted to
go. I wound up where I am.
9.
PLAYBOY: Do you miss vinyl discs?
LODER: You can't roll joints on CDs.
They're too small. You cant do any
drugs on them. That's really a drag. No-
body misses turning the record over. But
I miss good sound. I miss the fullness of
the sound. There's a whole generation
that’s not hearing it. Ike Turner used to
work with these sharpsters from Chica-
go, and they'd drive around Mississippi
with a huge Magnavox tape recorder in
the trunk of their Rocket 88. They'd stop
at the local electronics repair shop and
record Homesick James. This stuff was
really low-fi, but it's just rocking music.
You can’t reproduce the effect of a mono
record, which is everything coming at
you from one point. That experience is
lost. Everything is stereo now. The sam-
pling rate that was established with digi-
tal sound is so low that you're not hear-
ing the information you would hear оп а
record. You're hearing a distilled version
of и. That's why people complain that
CDs sound so icy. There's something
missing. The sampling rate should be
much, much higher. And it could be.
Sampling rate means how often the ma-
chine takes a cutting sample of the music
being played. It takes only one from
HIM! THERES:
ALWAYS MORE
here and one from there. Nirvana and
Pearl Jam put out their records on vinyl
first. If you listen to the Nirvana album,
their latest one, on vinyl, it's a different
record. And that’s why all the high-end
audio people swear by vinyl.
10.
PLAYBOY: So, how nasty are the gangsta
rappers?
LODER: Аз nasty as they want to be, as
they once put it. People get upset when
black people understand the game.
They understand it'll attract more peo-
ple if they say, “Hey kids, this shit is
nasty, it's about sex and bad shit.” And
underneath all that, some of the greatest
record production in American history is
going on. Dr. Dre is a great, great record
producer. The stuff that's going on in his
tracks is phenomenal, They're using
sounds that have never been used be-
fore. Some of it is synthesized and some
of it is sampled—electronically taking
phrases and putting them into a song.
These ghetto kids—these bad Negroes—
have mastered this stuff. What you have
here is a flowering of great musical tal-
ent from the black community. Rap is a
generational thing. If you grew up on
Otis Redding, you're not going to listen
to rap. But that's the point. You're not
supposed to.
PLAYBOY: Aren't you quite a fan of what
you once described as “dirty music”?
LODER: There's a grand tradition of dirty
music, When people decry rap music,
it’s bracing to go back and see that there
were songs like Z Want to Put a Banana in
Your Fruit Basket made around 1930. It's
tremendous. People were thinking of
sex and were thinking of women as sex
objects. Particularly men. I don't know
why that was. At the time, only these
crazy Negroes were interested in this
obviously degenerate shit. So this stuff
could be made, recorded and sold to the
audiences it was intended for, and white
people had no idea. Sex is good and it
hasn't disappeared. AIDS is a terrible
disease, but AIDS hasn't wiped out sex. I
hate to see AIDS used by right-wingers
аз a way to persuade young people not
to have sex. Because that’s generally
what they use it for. Rappers talking
about sex are young men talking about
sex. Whoa! The nation’s fate is obviously
at stake.
12.
PLAYBOY: Don't we detect some editorial-
izing in your on-air body language?
LODER: Гиз all in favor of editorializing.
You should present both sides of every
story, as we do. But ГА rather read
someone's reporting knowing what their
opinion is. I'm not trying to pull the
wool over anybody's eyes, but kids,
there's a lot of shit out there. The older
I get the more appalled I am. What's
going on with Michael Jackson? He is
someone whose music has never moved
me. His music is the definition of over-
producing. Michael Jackson's minions
sent around a note saying that from now
on, they wanted the press to refer to him
as the King of Fop. МТУ News, I can
tell you, refused. Because he's not. But
imagine the hubris of someone sending
around that note. What kind of person
wants to send that note? The music in-
dustry is built on that kind of hype. We
try to fight back as best we can. I was
hoping to see the pictures of Jackson's
penis, but they were never released.
Maybe Clinton's penis pictures will be
released. I don't know. I see a trading
card series.
13.
PLAYBOY: Do you attach any special sig-
nificance to the fact that when you ap-
peared as an extra in the movie The Ра-
per, director Ron Howard assigned you
to peer at Glenn Close and Jason Ro-
bards from over a toilet stall?
LODER: Yes, I took it as my due. It made
perfect sense to me. I winged it. 1 impro-
vised. Felt the character. That lasted ten
seconds. I had to be pointed out to my-
self. I didn't see it. My son saw it twice.
According to the technicians, they spent
an entire day cleaning the men’s room
at Radio City. It's a nice men's room.
Everybody was there.
14.
PLAYBOY: Have Nirvana and Pearl Jam
restored a purity to rock and roll that
had been missing for a while?
Loper: There was so much slick shit go-
ing on. But disco is rock and roll too.
Rock is not just a style. It's a way of look-
ing at stuff. Jeff Beck can play with jazz
guys or rock-and-roll guys. He's still Jeff
Beck and he's still exciting. He has no
idea how talented he is. Richard
Thompson is a great, gifted guitarist and
songwriter. He's perceived as a folk guy,
but he's definitely a rock-and-roll kind
of person. Rock is inclusive. I thought
Abba was a great pop act in the tradition
of the Phil Spector groups. They're
Swedish but they have that echoey Phil
Spector sound. Listen to Abba records
and you'll hear arrangements you can’t
believe. They're so clever. They wrote
the first women’s lib song, Hey, Hey Hel-
en. I miss Abba а lot.
15.
рглувоу: Defend the Sixties as the gold-
en age of rock.
LODER: It was just one of those periods
when some massive shift was happening
in popular culture, and that had to do
with technology and communications.
And being young is the most important
part of appreciating pop culture. You
hear things when you're 15 years old
that make an impression you can never
imagine. I remember hearing stuff when
1 was 15. Wow! Amazing! All the great
records that were made in New Orleans.
All the Little Richard stuff. All the Hank
Ballard and the Midnighters stuff. And
yet you have to be that age to have it
make an impression on you. It's a bio-
logical thing. The people who say the
Sixties were so great are people who
were 15 at some point in the Sixties. On 131
PLAYBOY
132
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the other hand, they really were great.
There’s no songwriting group like the
Beatles. There's no scene like swinging
London. Everybody seemed to feel bet-
ter. It was, "Let's go out and get high!
And wear really loud clothes! What do
you say?” Who's going to argue? These
days everything is so freighted with so-
ciopolitical bullshit. You just don't have
that simple, positive pleasure anymore.
16.
PLAYBOY: Dig deep into your files and
find some underappreciated music.
торек: There's so much. I wish more
people could hear Yma Sumac. She's a
woman who claimed to be a sun princess
from the Inca valleys. She probably was
from Connecticut. Yma Sumac was not
related to any folk tradition. No way.
Her music is ridiculous. Wonderfully
ridiculous. There was a kind of exoti-
cism in the Fifties, this tiki consciousness,
like the Mystic Moods Orchestra doing
It's a Rainy Night in Hawaii or something.
Whoa! It’s really exotic. Pretty good mu-
sic. Absolutely, In the music business,
you're inundated with records. And
most of them are garbage. So it’s a plea-
sure to go to 2 record store and drop a
couple hundred dollars and just find
stuff, It renews your enthusiasm. Go to
the New Age section. You might find
Brian Eno there. There are odd record
labels run by possessed people who
think the world needs to hear more.
You'll find ECM, a label with a strong
German-Scandinavian orientation to so-
lo, austere guitars. You have to hear it to
understand и. There's a band in Texas
called Brave Combo that does polka ver-
sions of Jimi Hendrix tunes. Really well.
17.
praxsoy: MTV programs for a young au-
dience. You wouldn’t be worried about
losing touch with viewers, would you?
Loper: No. I just sort of turned 50. Nev-
er tried to pretend J was 15 years old.
Never tried to set myself up as an arbiter
of young people’s music. The kids can
do that by themselves. I just try to do
what I do as nonstupidly as possible.
‘There are intelligent people in every age
group. That's an overlooked fact. My
son is always trying to find a way to be
different from me, but it’s hard. I love
the latest Nirvana album too. Whoa! I’m
not a big fan of the new Pantera album,
but that’s a minor point. The official
MTV demographics are the ages of 15
to 35 or something. Demographics are
made up all the time. Who knows what
they are?
18.
riaybor: This is supposed to be the age
of the short attention span. Have you
adjusted your own in an effort to hold
оп to the viewer who has the remote
in hand?
к?
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134
Loper: I have no attention span. Well, 1
can read a book. There’s no reason to
have a long attention span when you're
dealing with television. Why would you?
You have to pay attention to hours of
garbage. Same with computers. They're
supposed to be intuitive. There are so
many things you can skip in life, as well
as in technology. Don't you wish you
could have skipped adolescence and
gone right to getting laid? Wouldn't that
have been great? So there's something to
be said for short attention spans. But it's
bad when people don't read. We may be
losing that to a certain extent.
19.
rtavpoy: Do you resent the ratings suc-
cess of your animated MTV colleagues
Beavis and Butt-head?
Lover: No. They get really big ratings.
Beavis and Butt-head are perfect
They're the greatest rock critics of all
time. They are! Anyone who was 20
years old at any time in the history of the
world would love Beavis and Butt-head.
They say, “Butt munch.” They say outra-
geous things. They look at stupid videos
and say, “This is really stupid. It sucks.”
And it's so true. They're eloquent that
way. It's offensive to parents. It's offen-
sive to the common values we all hold
dear. It laughs at things that you're not
supposed to laugh at. Hey, do we love it
or what? How can I compete with that? I
rejoice in their shadows.
20.
PLAYBOY: Fess up. Are any Sixties-style
tie-dyed boxer shorts beneath those
black suits?
LODER: No. I was never into that. And I
grew up in the Sixties at a time when
you couldn't buy any pants that weren't
flared. I used to have long hair and oc-
casionally still do. I look bad with long
hair. My hair is really thin. I can't do
anything with it. With stupid hair and
flared pants, I didn’t make а good im-
pression. So the Sixties weren't a good
period for me. Now is a better time for
me. The things I loved the most about
the Sixties were music and drugs.
“While you were out, all hell broke loose.”
POSTMODERN COMIC
(continued from page 80)
willing teen beauty, Kuper's rabbit-eared
alter ego gulps, breaks into a monster
sweat and stammers, “I—I'll oblige you.”
Similar embarrassments inform Peep
Show, an unflinching look at the life of
artist Joe Matt. And slackers everywhere
can relate to the all-too-real shirking of
comic couch potato Buddy Bradley in
Peter Bagge's Hate, or the post-teen
angst found in Drawn & Quarterly's Op-
tic Nerve, by 20-year-old Adrian Tomine.
Women writers, also bitten by reality, are
turning out comic reads: Twisted Sisters,
for example, is Diane Noomin's antholo-
gy of cleverly caustic female views into
the world of hormones and high heels.
Not to be outdone, male writers have
gotten in touch with their feminine
sides: Jaime and Gilbert Hernandez’
long-running classic Love and Rockets fo-
cuses on a group of chicas in the barrios
of southern California; Why 1 Hate Saturn
is Kyle Baker's story of a sisterly love-
hate relationship.
The popularity of adult comics isn't
limited to America. In Japan, Salary-
man—that harried and hyperaggressive
man in the gray flannel suit—is likely
to read a comic book on the commute
home. Japanese readers just can't get
enough of comic “mooks” (short for
magazine-books). And in France, comi
books are referred to as the “ninth art,
part of thar country’s narional classifi-
cation of art forms. French President
Francois Mitterrand has even talked to
the press about his favorite comics.
It's also easy to see twisted touches of
alternative comics in the mainstream.
The Simpsons, Ren @ Stimpy and MIV's
Liquid Television owe a debt to (and share
some personnel with) their off-the-rack
cousins. Evan Dorkin's violent duo, Milk
and Cheese, have such cachet that the
children on Roseanne wear Milk & Cheese
T-shirts to show off their hip affinity for
dairy products gone bad.
The most compelling relationship is
between comics and movies. There are
obvious lifts for the general audience—
The Crow, the wildly successful The Mask
and Tank Girl—but even such movies as
Total Recall or Speed carry a strain of al-
ternative psycho energy. In turn, it
doesn't take much heavy lifting to imag-
ine such filmmakers as Quentin Taranti-
no and David Lynch influencing New
Wave noir writers who treat comic books
as low-fi storyboards for mental movies
that are too fantastic, violent or grim for
Hollywood—or at least for the Holly-
wood of today.
Chief among the graphically inventive
narratives is The Sandman, published by
DC Comics’ Vertigo line of adult-orient-
ed titles. The Sandman is Morpheus,
lord of dreams. In the course of one se-
ries, writer Neil Gaiman weaves together
Norse, Greek and Japanese mythology,
Egyptian religion and African rituals.
The result: a liberal arts primer geared
to a college audience. In one comic book
panel Gaiman introduces playwrights
Christopher Marlowe and William
Shakespeare with a snippet of dialogue
from a Marlowe play. No further iden-
tification. Norman Mailer has said,
“Sandman is a comic strip for intellectu-
als, and I say it's about time.”
The Mystery Play, by Grant Morrison
and Jon Muth, treads similar lofty—and
cloudy—turf. Set during a town’s re-cre-
ation of a medieval mystery play, Muth's
graphic novel looks as if it were drawn
by a cinematographer. When the actor
playing God is murdered, a detective
and a reporter set out to find the killer.
More unabashedly bleak, Frank Miller's
Sin City series takes Raymond Chandler
and—yikes!—goes one up on the ni-
hilism. His characters are classic movie
archetypes: the whore with a heart of
gold, the good girlfriend turned bad,
the stoic hit man. But in Miller's work
the hero—or antihero—usually ends
up dead.
In today’s 500-channel, remote-con-
trol entertainment universe, comic
books serve as short attention span the-
ater of the absurd. Call it low-tech CD-
ROM—only rapid-fire images and sur-
real or disjointed narratives need apply.
Charles Burns’ stories, such as Blood Club
and Curse of the Molemen, feature strange,
stylized illustrations and eerie plots re-
volving around a boy named Big Baby.
When Big Baby runs into space aliens
beneath his neighbors backyard, he
greets their presence with a gee-whiz en-
thusiasm straight from B movies of the
Fifties. Both Daniel Clowes’ Like a Velvet
Glove Cast in Iron and the Residents’ Freak
Show (a print partner to the group's CD-
ROM) are populated with a claustropho-
bic array of eccentric and freakish char-
acters—some of whom you might meet
at Lollapalooza. Either book is perfect
entertainment for the pierce-firstask-
questions-later crowd.
Ultimately, the success of these and
other alternative comics will continue to
affect the rest of the industry. In DC
Comics’ graphic novel Arkham Asylum, il-
lustrated by Dave McKean and written
by Grant Morrison, Batman, the venera-
ble hero from our youth, travels to the
edge of his sanity when he confronts
criminal psychotics running their own
asylum. The lush artwork seems as if it’s
refracted through a whacked-out prism.
Even the Joker undergoes a revisionist
slant. He is no longer the clown prince of
crime in whiteface, but a leering, inco-
herent nut job. The twisted thing is, he
makes more sense to today's audience
than his traditional forebear ever could.
This is not your father's Joker. And these
are definitely not your father's comics.
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PLAYBOY
MEL GIBSON (continued from page 68)
I have tremendous respect for women. I love them. All
good things emanate from them. The guys mess up.
want your older brothers to get drafted?
GIBSON: I don't know, but I heard him
say at one time, “They're not getting any
of my kids.”
PLAYBOY: Were your parents especially
strong disciplinarians?
GIBSON: Yeah, they liked to run a pretty
tight ship. They didn't let us get away
with anything. But it wasn't like we had
to shut up at mealtime. It was just kind
of nutty.
PLAYBOY: Didn't your father once get so
angry at your older brother and sister
that he knocked their heads together?
GIBSON: Yeah. He told them they were
not allowed to talk to each other for six
months, and if he ever saw them even
looking at each other he would beat the
shit out of them. And they didn't com-
municate at all for a real long time.
When they finally did, they were the best
of friends. It worked.
PLAYBOY: Did you get into much trouble?
GIBSON: 1 used to break the law a bit. I
was a good criminal as a child. I never
got caught. And I did kid stuff, like bor-
Tow the family car.
PLAYBOY: How did you do that without
geuing caught, since you had so many
people in your family?
GIBSON: I did it at onc A.M.
PLAYBOY: Didn't you also once staple your
sister’s head?
GIBSON: Yeah. She was sitting there and
it was just one of those compulsions. It
was a big stapler, too. She screamed her
head off and I was in serious trouble. 1
didn't stick around, but they hunted me
down and I got a whacking.
PLAYBOY: Was there a lot of fighting
among you and your brothers?
GIBSON: Oh, there was plenty of fighting.
You don't grow up in a crowd like that
and not punch one another out all the
time. I've got five brothers, and three of
them are within two years of me. We'd
pound the shit out of one another, Espe-
cially as teenagers. There were twin
brothers a year younger than me. I used
to wonder: I'm older, why are there two
of them? Why are they bigger than me?
They would stick together and I'd have
to find ways to distract them. I remem-
ber one of them actually picked me up
and threw me out of his room. It was hu-
miliating. I had to get even. So I
knocked on his door, and when he an-
swered it, lights out.
PLAYBOY: You knocked him out?
GIBSON: Yeah. That's when I was 15, 16.
We'd just about kill one another. Very
satisfying.
136 PLAYBOY: Were things more peaceful at
the all-boys Catholic school you attended
in Australia?
GIBSON: No. I got whacked around for
smoking, fighting, not following their
stupid rules. I had a rough time. I'm not
much of a conformist. I was known for
being a bit of a clown. I remember my
dad got me aside and said, “Just remem-
ber, everybody likes a clown, but nobody
pays him.” I've often been tempted to
call him and say, “Remember how you
told те... 2" “Yeah?” “Yes, they do.”
PLAYBOY: Wasn't it one of your sisters who
decided your career for you when she
applied to Sydney's National Institute of
Dramatic Arts on your behalf?
GIBSON: That was Mary. 1 was wandering
around without a purpose, so she point-
ed my nose in this direction. 1 thought,
What the hell else am 1 going to do?
There really wasn't much I wanted to
do. And I had never done anything like
acting before. The first time I had to go
onstage I was physically ill and I couldn't
stand up. My legs wouldn't support me.
1 had to do и sitting down. И was blind
terror.
PLAYBOY: What made you go back a sec-
ond time?
GIBSON: I just wondered, What the hell
could knock the shit out of you like that?
The next night it didn't happen. I found
it very liberating.
PLAYBOY, How often do you all get to-
gether as a family?
GIBSON: The last time we got together
was for my mother's funeral. It was
great.
PLAYBOY: That was about five years ago.
What did she die of?
GIBSON: Just her heart. She was in her
late 60s.
PLAYBOY: How did it affect everybody?
GIBSON: They were all stunned. She was
the mortar and the bricks. She held
everything together,
PLAYBOY: Are you an emotional family?
GIBSON: Not overly. And not overly ex-
pressive, either.
PLAYBOY: Do you believe in an afterlife,
and that you'll see her there?
GIBSON: Absolutely. There's just no ex-
planation. There has to be an afterlife
Otherwise where is the evening-out pro-
cess? There has to be an afierlife because
Hider and I both walked the planet and
I'm not going to the same place as Hiller.
Or Pol Pot.
PLAYBOY: Is there a hell?
GIBSON: Absolutely.
PLAYBOY: What's your image of the devil?
GIBSON: The beast with eight tongues
and four horns and fire and brimstone.
Probably worse than anything we can
imagine, as paradise is probably beuer
than anything we can imagine.
PLAYBOY: Do you believe in Darwin's the-
ory of evolution or that God created
man in his image?
GIBSON: The latter.
PLAYBOY: So you can't accept that we de-
scended from monkeys and apes?
GIBSON: No, I think it's bullshit. Ifit isn't,
why are they still around? How come
apes aren't people yet? It's a nice theory,
but I can't swallow it. There's a big cred-
ibility gap. The carbon dating thing that
tells you how long something's been
around, how accurate is that, really? I've
got one of Darwin's books at home and
some of that stuff is pretty damn funny.
Some of his stuff is true, like that the gi-
raffe has a long neck so it can reach the
leaves. But I just don't think you can
swallow the whole piece.
PLAYBOY: We take it that you're not par-
ticularly broad-minded when it comes to
issues such as celibacy, abortion, birth
contro|—
GIBSON: People always focus on stuff like
that. Those aren't issues. Those are
unquestionable. You don't even argue
those points.
PLAYBOY: You don't?
GIBSON: No.
PLAYBOY: What about allowing women to
bc priests?
GIBSON: No.
PLAYBOY. Why not?
GIBSON: I'll get kicked around for saying
it, but men and women are just differ-
ent. They're not equal. The same way
that you and I are not equal.
PLAYBOY: That's true. You have more
money.
GIBSON: You might be more intelligent,
or you might have a bigger dick. What-
ever it is, nobody's equal. And men and
women are not equal. I have tremen-
dous respect for women. I love them. I
don't know why they want to step down.
Women in my family are the center of
things. All good things emanate from
them. The guys usually mess up.
PLAYBOY: That’s quite a generalization
GIBSON: Women are just different. "Their
sensibilities are different.
PLAYBOY: Any examples?
GIBSON: I had a female business partner
once. Didn't work.
PLAYBOY: Why not?
GIBSON: She was a cunt.
PLAYBOY: And the feminists dare to put
you down!
GIBSON: Feminists don't like me, and I
don't like them. I don't get their point. I
don’t know why feminists have it out for
me, but that's their problem, not mine.
PLAYBOY: What did you so dislike about
your former business partner?
GIBSON: She was more vicious than any
guy in business Гуе ever seen. She
thought she needed to overcompensate
for the fact that she was a woman. Which
is just bullshit. It's like unbelievable fe-
rocity and unreasonableness. Then,
when you got to her reason, she'd pull
the woman thing on you. She wasn't fair.
They don't play fair.
PLAYBOY: All women, or just this woman?
GIBSON: It happens а lot. They're not
coming from the same place at all. There
are certain things men will never under-
stand about them. We'll never get it. And
you're supposed to be nice to them. Be-
cause they can hurt you. It's like that
joke about the guy who bedded three
women: Lorena Bobbitt, Tonya Harding
and Hillary Clinton. He woke up with no
penis, his kneecaps bashed in and no
health insurance.
PLAYBOY: Does your wife share any of
your beliefs?
GIBSON: No.
PLAYBOY: Does she think that you're a
Neanderthal?
GIBSON: Yeah, but she likes it that way.
PLAYBOY: Maybe she was just too young
to know any better when she met you.
GIBSON: I guess I was a good catch.
PLAYBOY: Your wife has kept a low profile
Where did you meet?
GIBSON: I was in South Australia for my
first assignment in a theater company. 1
was one of the boarders in a house
where she lived.
PLAYBOY: Was it love at first sight?
GIBSON: No, it wasn't until a year later.
She had a boyfriend.
PLAYBOY: So how did it happen?
GIBSON: I don't know if І want to talk
about it. I don't know if she'd feel good
about that either.
PLAYBOY: Any ideas on what makes а
marriage work?
GIBSON: Don't talk about your wife dur-
ing interviews [laughs].
PLAYBOY: What do you think of when you
think about love?
GIBSON: Sacrifice.
PLAYBOY: How do you feel about love
scenes in your films?
GIBSON: Depends. It's like being ushered
into a room with a stranger and being
told, “Here, take off your clothes and
swap some spit.” It's uncomfortable. Es-
pecially with cameras watching you.
Think about it—would you do it?
PLAYBOY: If it were Michelle Pfeiffer or
Sigourney Weaver or Jodie Foster —
GIBSON: It's still pretty weird. What can I
tell you?
PLAYBOY: Tell us about what it was like
working with Michelle Pfeiffer, Sigour-
ney Weaver and Jodie Foster. You played
Scrabble with Pfeiffer in Tequila Sunrise.
How good was she?
GIBSON: Real good.
PLAYBOY: She beat you?
GIBSON: More often than not.
PLAYBOY: And you played poker with Fos-
ter in Maverick.
GIBSON: Jodie’s a sweet person. I real-
ly love her. And she's a real careful
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PLAYBOY
player. Holds her cards tight before she
puts her quarter out there.
PLAYBOY: What did you think of The Маг
of Living Dangerously with Sigourney
Weaver?
GIBSON: It wasn't the greatest story, but it
had that ability as a film to hold you and
make you watch it.
PLAYBOY: Wasn't there some trouble
shooting that film in Manila, where peo-
ple started throwing stones and making
death threats?
GIBSON: The film unit received death
threats from some Islamic group or
something because they knew we were
doing a story about President Sukarno
and Indonesia. 1 thought it was kind of
exciting: death threats. Then, before we
knew it, we got whisked out of the coun-
try. It wasn’t worth it, it was just a film.
We shot most of it in Sydney.
PLAYBOY: Linda Hunt, who won an Oscar
for her performance, said that you're
not there before a scene, that you're de-
liberately uninvolved and absent. She
said it was a macho thing.
GIBSON: Yeah? It’s not a macho thing аг
all. It's just the way I work. I've always
worked like that
PLAYBOY: She also said that when you get
in front of the camera your attention is
forceful and total, that you control the
camera the way the young Brando did,
marshaling your energy.
GIBSON: That's very generous of her, I
never looked at it as that complicated.
1 enjoy the work situation tremendously.
I get on with the crew, I hang out on the
set, I don’t hide in a trailer.
PLAYBOY: While we're on comparisons,
Mark Rydell, who directed The River,
said that you have the roughness of a
Steve McQueen or a Paul Newman and
the sensitivity ofa Monty Clift.
GIBSON: Thanks, Mark. Steve McQueen.
Nobody handles props like Steve did.
Man, that guy was good with a piece of
equipment—the fire stuff, the cars, the
guns. He knew exactly what his power
was and he used it really well
PLAYBOY: How do you feel when you're
compared to such people?
GIBSON: Comparisons like that are flat-
tering. In reality, people are always try-
ing to find a way to pigeonhole you. In
fact, I'm nothing like any of them. ГИ
never be able to do what they did, and 1
hope I've got my own territory that no
one else can poach.
PLAYBOY: Were you frustrated playing
Hamlet, which you said should have
been done onstage and not filmed?
GIBSON: Pd like то do Hamlet onstage be-
cause I've never done it in sequence. Гуе
done it only in pieces, with the first part
lastand the last part first, the last third of
the soliloquy filmed a month before the
first two thirds. It wasn't a good experi-
ence because it was so disjointed. Nor
was I happy with the result, because
188 there's no conclusion that you can really
come to. There’s no answer to it. It’s
more elusive than you think и The
whole play is about asking questions, not
about getting answers. Shakespeare
wrote it during a crisis in his life and he
was questioning everything.
PLAYBOY: Do you see Hamlet as mad?
GIBSON: Yes, I think so.
PLAYBOY: And how did you feel about
Franco Zeffirelli’s direction?
GIBSON: Гуе never actually been honest
about what I think of Zeffirelli, ever.
PLAYBOY: Why not?
GIBSON: Because it wouldn't do any
good. I don't really want to dump on
poor Franco. He's got his problems, the
poor bastard.
PLAYBOY: Are there any other Shake-
speare plays you might like to do?
GIBSON: Гуе always liked Othello.
PLAYBOY: To play Othello ог lago?
GIBSON: lago. It’s the best part.
PLAYBOY: What about King Lear?
GIBSON: Lear annoys me. He pisses me
off. He's a real old fart. That's being
judgmental about a character, which
Stanislavsky tells us we're not supposed
to do. But hey, King Lear sucks.
PLAYBOY: You can be fairly critical. And
you've been on the receiving end of
some pointed criticism yourself. The re-
views for Air America, for instance, were
very harsh.
GIBSON: That was given the distinction
by one critic of being one of the ten
worst films of the decade, which I think
is bullshit. It's better than that. It isn't a
perfect film. A lot of things aren't right
with it, but it's OK.
PLAYBOY: How do you feel about another
critical bomb, Bird on a Wire, which you
did with Goldie Hawn?
GIBSON: Not one of my favorites. It's a
mindless bit of stuff. There’s something
very unfunny about it, like a puzzle that
doesn’t fit together.
PLAYBOY: You've acted with Goldie, and
with her boyfriend, Kurt Russell, in
Tequila Sunrise
GIBSON: Which I liked. It had that
Robert Towne structure that turned a
molehill into a mountain. One of the
most interesting evenings [ ever had was
when I was working on Нате! in Lon-
don and Kurt and Goldie rolled in while
my mom and dad were there. They got
to talking about religion. Kurt was
yelling and chiming in loudly, Goldie
was there, my mother was going, “Red,
please calm down” to my father. I just sat.
back and watched the fireworks Ну.
PLAYBOY: Kurt is opinionated and loves a
heated political discussion. Do you ever
get involved with politics?
GIBSON: I once was involved with politics
in Australia. I stuck my proboscis into
the arena, trying to get someone clected
to a local seat. Because I was me, I got
a lot of attention. It was amazing, It
opened my eyes to something that was
really scary. When you rip the top off the
scab and look at the shit underneath, it's
frightening. I was really fucking cynical
when 1 walked away from that.
PLAYBOY: Your man lost?
GIBSON: Yeah, but not by much. It was so
nasty, so vicious. There's nothing people
won't do to fuck you over for their own
ends. I'm talking right up to the prime
minister at the time, Bob Hawke. What
an asshole. He fucking made a personal
attack on me.
PLAYBOY: Why?
GIBSON: Because I said something that
was kind of true and it really bothered
him, It scared him. He came down to the
country town where 1 lived, went to the
newspaper and dumped shit on me.
‘This is the prime minister of the country.
PLAYBOY: What did he say about you?
GIBSON: “He is a fine fellow, but he
should stick to acting. Let the people
who know about government run the
country.” Like, wait a minute, hang on,
whoa! That's us, it’s our country, we've
elected you to represent our interests.
PLAYBOY: Did you respond?
GIBSON: Fuck yes, ferociously. I was so
mad I went to the same reporter he
talked with and I dumped on him the
next day. 1 acquitted myself very well
and made him look pretty crummy. But
as a result that reporter was moved to a
cushy job in Canberra within a week.
PLAYBOY: Is Australian politics any differ-
ent from politics in other countries?
GIBSON: | travel a lot, so I can look at
similar events all around the world and
say there’s something funny going on
here. It's really fucking corrupt and hor-
rible. And it drives me crazy.
PLAYBOY: Do you think there's any place
that's not corrupt?
GIBSON: No, there isn’t. I guess we all
know that. Its when you finally wake up
to the horror and the nastiness of it.
PLAYBOY: Hawke is no longer prime min-
ister of Australia.
GIBSON: No, Paul Keating 15 the current
idiot over there.
PLAYBOY: Maybe a good thing you
never became an Australian citizen.
GIBSON: There was no reason to get nat-
uralized. I wouldn't live there again.
PLAYBOY: Don't you have an 800-acre
ranch there?
GIBSON; 1 do. But they don’t know what
to do with me down there. I'm some-
thing of a curiosity, OK? It's, you know,
the guy who wasn’t born there. But 1
lived there, І was educated there, had
my formative years there—puberty, high
school, university, career choices, voca-
tional stuff. That's where I come from.
‘That's where I started to make good and
then I came over here and made good
here. 1 found it was more lucrative and
there was a greater artistic pool over
here. Then it’s like, “Oh, look at that fel-
low. He thinks he's pretty good now.” So
they start to tear you down a bit. It's OK,
I can handle it, I'm a big boy. They have
“This is really fascinating, Clive—do
meteorologists screw, too?”
139
PLAYBOY
cycles of building you back up and then
tearing you down again. It's happening
now and I don't know why. Somebody's
got an ax to grind. So you go back there
and every time you fart a crew comes
down and starts looking through your
windows. So why the fuck should I
go back?
PLAYBOY None of this happens in Los
Angeles?
GIBSON; The same thing happens here,
but it's just by virtue of the number of
people in this country that it’s easier. It’s
just as corrupt. I'm terribly cynical about
politics and politicians. I see the same
trends here that I saw overseas.
PLAYBOY: How do you feel about Bill
Clinton?
GIBSON: He's a low-level opportunist.
Somebody's telling him what to do.
PLAYBOY: Who?
GIBSON: The guy who's in charge isn't
going to be the front man, ever. I£ I were
going to be calling the shots I wouldn't
make an appearance. Would you? You'd
end up losing your head. It happens all
the time. All those monarchs. If he’s the
leader, he’s getting shafted. What's keep-
ing him in there? Why would you stay
for that kind of abuse? Except that he
has to stay for some reason. He was
meant to be the president 30 years ago,
if you ask me.
PLAYBOY: He was just 18 then.
GIBSON: Somebody knew then that he
would be president now
PLAYBOY: You really believe that?
GIBSON: I really believe that. He was
a Rhodes scholar, right? Just like Bob
Hawke. Do you know what a Rhodes
scholar is? Cecil Rhodes established the
Rhodes scholarship for these young men
and women who want to strive for a new
world order. Have you heard that be-
fore? George Bush? CIA? Really, it’s
Marxism, but it just doesn’t want to call
itself that. Karl had the right idea, but he
was too forward about saying what it
was. Get power but don't admit to it. Do
it by stealth. There's a whole trend of
Rhodes scholars who will be politicians
around the world.
PLAYBOY. This certainly sounds like a
paranoid sense of world history. You
must be quite an assassination buff.
GIBSON: Oh, fuck. A lot of those guys
pulled a boner. There's something to do
with the Federal Reserve that Lincoln
did, Kennedy did and Reagan tried. 1
can’t remember what it was, my dad told
me about it. Everyone who did this par-
ticular thing that would have fixed the
economy got undone. Anyway, ГЇ end
up dead if I keep talking shit.
PLAYBOY: No one can accuse you of keep-
ing your big mouth shut.
GIBSON: I used to get into trouble be-
cause I had a really big trap. I'd say
things to people and they'd take offense
because I'm not the soul of tact. It still
140 plagues me.
PLAYBOY: You could have fooled us. Let's
check some of your other attitudes.
Where do you stand on the issue of cap-
ital punishment?
GIBSON: For certain crimes, yeah, you
should knock them off. You've got to re-
move certain people, like they're too aw-
ful to be around.
PLAYBOY: Gun control?
GIBSON: That's a tough question. There
are so many assholes out there with
guns, and theyll always have guns,
so you might as well have the right to
bear arms.
PLAYBOY: Do you own guns?
GIBSON: I would rather not talk about
that. I do.
PLAYBOY: You have six children. How do
you deal with the fact that most gun acci-
dents happen in the home?
GIBSON: By keeping it in someone else's
house.
PLAYBOY: What type of protection does
that offer?
GIBSON: Anybody comes knocking, I've
got a hockey stick and a bat and, what's
even better, a shinto stick, which I can
beat the shit out of them with. It's real
snappy, like a hurling stick. It's a wian-
gular piece of wood from Scotland.
PLAYBOY: You can use it on your critics,
who have called you, among other
things, homophobic, misogynistic
GIBSON: Racist, bigoted, all sorts of
things.
PLAYROY- Are you any of those things?
GIBSON: No, I'm nor. I’m really not. I
think if you suggest that you find some
modes of behavior unnatural, then you
become all those things. And you get
vilified. It’s like having people holding
signs and trying to spit on you.
PLAYBOY: Has that ever happened to you?
GIBSON: Yeah.
PLAYBOY: When?
GIBSON: When 1 put my hands in cement
a couple of years ago.
PLAYBOY: Outside Mann's Chinese The-
ater in Hollywood?
GIBSON: Yeah, that’s when I found out I
was a misogynist, a bigot, a racist, a neo-
Nazi and a homophobe. They had signs,
they were screaming and frothing at the
mouth, pure hatred. It was wild. People
just looking for attention.
PLAYBOY: That was a gay protest, right?
GIBSON: Yeah, totally whipped up from
nowhere. I got up to the microphone to
say something and it was, like, jeers. I
decided to go up and look at the people
to see who they were and why they were
so angry.
PLAYBOY: Do you know why they were an-
gry with you?
GIBSON: It was over something I said five
years ago in a Spanish interview, which
was taken the wrong way. I don’t want to
go into it again because it’s like igniting a
fucking spark. 1 just don't want it—I
don't want anyone writing to me or com-
ing to my house. 1 don't want any of that
shit. Suffice it to say that I've been
chased by automobiles doing dangerous
things on the freeway. I'm not even com-
fortable with you printing this because
there are certain organizations that like
to breathe down my neck. I don't give a
fuck what they do so long as they keep it
to themselves.
PLAYBOY: But what did you say that so
pissed them off?
GIBSON: Whatever it was I said, they
found it offensive. The next day I was
doing an interview on national television
and was asked, “So, are you going to
apologize? You've offended the commu-
nity.” I said, “I'm not apologizing to any-
one. I'll apologize when hell freezes
over. They can fuck off.” Then the war
started. It's made me totally paranoid.
I've got to learn to keep my mouth shut.
PLAYBOY: Not yet, though. We still have
a few more questions. What's the best
script you've read?
GIBSON: Schindler's List, which I read in
one sitting. I fully expected not to like it.
lt surprised me. Holocaust stories had
been done to death. But I was totally
sucked into it and really moved by it.
PLAYBOY: Were you being considered for
Schindler?
GIBSON: I was one of those nameless peo-
ple who did an audition that was sup-
posed to be confidential.
PLAYBOY: And you wanted the part?
GIBSON: Yeah, sure.
PLAYBOY. What did you think of Liam
Neeson in the role?
GIBSON: Oh, he was fine, great. He was
that big teddy bear guy. Liam brought
his own thing to that, which was wonder-
ful. I would have made him a lot slicker.
PLAYBOY: Are there other parts that
you've wanted but didn’t get?
GIBSON: I rarely talk about this kind of
stuff. I only really tried to do one thing,
and that was Mozart in Amadeus. | was 25
years old and just barged in on director
Milos Forman, It was one of those meet-
ings. He was really uncomfortable, so I
thought Id leave him the hell alone.
PLAYBOY: Al Pacino also wanted a part in
that movic—Salicri, whom Е Murray
Abraham played. But Forman said he
didn’t want big stars in it.
GIBSON: I didn’t have that excuse. He
didn't know who the hell I was.
PLAYBOY: We haven't talked much about
your directing.
GIBSON: I really like doing that.
PLAYBOY: Does being an actor help you as
a director?
GIBSON: Absolutely. No question.
That's how I access the whole thing,
right through that door. I think actors
make good directors.
PLAYBOY: The Man Without a Face was the
first motion picture you directed. You
would have preferred to get William
Hurt or Jeff Bridges to act in it, but they
both turned it down, didn't they?
GIBSON: Yeah, either they didn’t like itor
they were busy. I kept giving the script
out to people and they kept saying no, so
I thought, Fuck, ГИ do it. It was a scary
but rewarding experience.
PLAYBOY: What made you think you
could direct it?
GIBSON: I just thought I could tell the
story as well as anyone. I could scc it in
my mind. It was a good place to go, into
uncharted waters. The week before I
started shooting I saw Peter Weir and he
said, "I hear you're going to direct a
film." 1 said, "Yeah, I'm really scared."
: Didn't you also ask Clint East-
wood for advice?
GIBSON: I talked with him. I had read
Unforgiven before he shot it, so I just
called him up. I was clutching at straws,
I was just terrified
PLAYBOY: What kind of advice did East-
wood give you?
GIBSON: He said, “Just relax. A lot of this
stuff is subliminal shit. You probably
picked it up and you don't even know
it.” And he was right
BOY: After the Mad Max films you
said that you had no intention of becom-
ing Mr. Action Adventure or the next
Clint Eastwood. Looking at how East-
wood’s career has gone, would you take
that back?
GIBSON: No. You can’t be Clint. Not the
tall one. Nobody can match the tall one.
PLAYBOY: Does that also mean there won't
be a Lethal Weapon 42
GIBSON: No. Not with that title. Maybe
something like it. We've done itto death.
Three times, for Pete’s sake. We're lucky.
PLAYBOY: You seemed to get along well
with Danny Glover
GIBSON: Danny's cool. He's good to work
with. Those films were very rewarding.
It's just horsing around. But that's the
spirit of Donner. He's like a big kid. He
doesn't take life too seriously. But he's al-
so got the wisdom of your dad.
PLAYBOY: Are they your most popular
films?
GIBSON: Yeah. Tough-guy, macho stuff.
They're almost cartoons.
PLAYBOY: You got to know Gary Визеу
during the first Lethal Weapon. Didn't he
take you to a Lakota Sioux sweat lodge?
GIBSON: Yeah, it was a Native American
church in the hills above Malibu.
Indians came from everywhere. It was
the real deal. It was a friendly, loving
experience. Basically, they shut the
doors, heat up the fire and pray. There
were men and women so we were all in
bathing suits, shoulder to shoulder. It
was completely dark and hard to
breathe. I did athing recently called wat-
su, ever hear of that?
PLAYBOY: No.
GIBSON: It’s this weird deal where they
put you in water and hold you like a ba-
by and float you around. It's very womb-
like. Somebody is stretching your limbs.
A woman was holding me. It was in Palm
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PLAYBOY
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PLAYBOY: Was your wife with you?
GIBSON: Yeah, she tried it, too. I thought
it was great. I've done a lot of that crap—
mud baths, saunas, hot tubs. I even
used to do that thing where you hang
upside down and stretch your spine, but
that fucked up my knees and ankles
PLAYBOY: Your wife once claimed that the
only sort of exercise you do is lifting
babies.
GIBSON: I never used to work out, but
now I'll run six miles and then lift very
light weights once a week. I feel better
now than I did ten years ago. I live
leaner. I can run farther and last longer.
PLAYBOY: When you're relaxing, what
music do you listen to?
GIBSON: Anything, from Nine Inch
Nails to Chopin's nocturnes to opera. I
love opera.
PLAYBOY: Whom do you prefer, Pavarotti
or Domingo?
GIBSON: | like Placido. Pavarotti's got the
sweetest voice, but the real balls, I think,
is Placido. But I like Jussi Björling better
than both of them.
PLAYBOY: How much of a gambler are
you?
GIBSON: Every now and then I might bet
on a fight or horse around on the
roulette wheel. A guy once showed me а
surefire system. I wish I could remem-
ber it. It works in circuits, and you al-
ways win. I think I lived off my gambling
winnings in London.
PLAYBOY: With a surefire system, what's
the most you have ever lost playing
roulette?
GIBSON: I dropped about $11,000 one
time, which is too much. There’s some-
thing kind of immoral about it.
PLAYBOY: But generally, you feel lucky?
GIBSON: Yeah. One time in Australia I
was driving through a country town and
it was a real good time in my life, coming
after a real rough time. I said, “You
know what? I should bet a horse.” There
was an offtrack betting outlet at the side
of the road. I decided to take whatever I
had in my wallet and put it on the first
race. I picked this fucking name because
I liked it, New Beginning, and slapped
$36—all 1 had—on him. It was a 50-1
shot. It was televised and I watched this
horse tip this other one by a nose. I
wasn't surprised. I went back, turned in
my ticket and got all this bread in cash.
Stashed it in my pocket, got in the car
and drove off. Those kinds of things
happen to me.
PLAYBOY: Life's been good to you. Do you
suffer at all from guilt?
GIBSON: People who don't deal with guilt
have a problem, unless you never do
anything to transgress what you know to
be right or wrong. And there are very
few people who don't step over the line,
because it's fun to goof up, it's fun to
fuck up. It is. You can't deny it.
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144
ROAD TEST «cape 106)
They spent cocktail hour draining a wine bar, then
went to their room and made bed-damaging love.
by a homicidal river. He was new to love
and fascinated by it. It was as intense as
life-threatening sports but even more
satisfying.
He booked a room in Knightsbridge.
Then he started to call the airline to see
if he could get a seat on Donna's flight;
his wasn't leaving for another two days
Donna insisted he hang up. He asked
why she didn't want to fly home togeth-
er. She said that she did, but in the
long run they'd benefit from reminding
themselves it was possible to survive not
spending 24 hours a day together, re-
minding themselves they actually had
some self-control. She said it in a wry,
rueful, quietly wise tone, then began do-
ing one of Pratt's favorite things.
When they were spent, Donna wept
and dung to him and kissed all of his
face, memorizing it with her lips.
They spent their last day wandering
London, letting the streets decide where
they would go. The only specific place
Pratt and Donna wanted to be was with
each other. For the first three hours the
streets respected their wishes and took
them no place in particular, but eventu-
ally delivered them to the British Muse-
um. Pratt and Donna passed an hour
in the correspondence files, snooping
through letters written in earlier dec-
ades and centuries by lovers who had
been separated—some by great events of
state, some by the mundane business of
everyday life. Pratt couldn't find any
who had separated as an educational ex-
ercise in self-control.
Late that afternoon Pratt and Donna
drifted into an antique shop and bought
cach other engravings from an 1844 ac-
tor’s instructional manual that illustrat
ed the Thirty-Six Classical Facial Expres-
sions. Pratt gave Donna one of a woman
tossing a profile, narrowing her eyes and
flaring her nostrils, titled “Number 17,
Mysterious.” Donna gave Pratt one of a
man with chin held high, a heroic gaze
and one fist clenched to his breast, titled
“Number 23, Undaunted.”
They spent cocktail hour draining a
fet
‘And now, for the talent portion of the pageant, Miss Hall
will fake an orgasm.”
wine bar Donna was fond of, then went
back to their room and made desperate,
kinetic, bed-damaging love.
They bribed their way into a riverside
table at a brilliantly fashionable Mediter-
ranean restaurant on Cheyne Walk. Ihe
food was extraordinary. Pratt didn't no-
tice. Donna, radiating affection, told
charming, self-deprecatory stories of her
youth, the kind of revelations that she
had never offered before. Pratt's brain
recorded them for playback at a lat-
er date.
They lingered over cognacs. At one
point Donna seemed to gather herself as
if getting ready to say something impor-
tant. All chat came out was a sigh and a
slightly wrinkled grin.
They walked in silence, arm in arm,
back toward the hotel. Slowly, making
it last.
‘They were approached by an Asian
woman carrying а sleeping infant. She
asked if they wanted to buy jewelry. Don-
na said no thanks and gave her some
money. Pratt said yes and bought a
ring. The woman blessed them and
moved on.
Pratt took Donna’s hand, held up the
ring and asked her to marry him.
Tears glistening in her eycs, she told
him she already was. Married.
Pratt glanced at her ringless left hand,
which he was still holding. Donna cx-
plained that she and her husband didn’t
wear rings.
She answered the next question be-
fore Pratt could ask. Yes, it was a good
marriage. One child, a daughter, 13. Yes,
she'd be staying with her husband. Their
опе problem was that they traveled mis-
erably together, got irritable and had
nasty arguments. In order to keep the
marriage together they always took sep-
arate vacations.
Pratt nodded to show he understood.
Donna wasn't cert he did. Her trav-
els weren't about sex. She'd been un-
faithful only once before, a one-night
stand. Nothing like Pratt. Pratt was the
romance of her life, the traveling com-
panion she never dreamed that she
would find.
Pratt whispered, "Yeah."
He concentrated hard and was finally
able to let go of her hand.
Donna said she was sorry she'd been
too gutless and selfish to tell him, up
front, right away. She said she wouldn't
blame him if he hated her
Pratt looked away for а moment, then
slowly looked back at her Said nothing.
Donna met his gaze. She said if he
wanted, she would meet him once a year,
for two weeks, anywhere in the world.
But only if she never, ever saw or heard
from him at home.
LEIA E
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145
146
VOLLEYBALL contin from page 124)
“When things are completely flat out there, it’s like
bad sex—the harder you try the worse it gets.”
“Call your boss, Tony,” says Masakay-
an. “Tell him we have a small problem
with the bill and that you'll be a while.”
.
Despite Kirby and Masakayan's tour-
nament dominance, the crowd is rooting
fora close match in the Manhattan final.
Fontana and Kotas-Forsythe are the
tour’s second-ranked pair, so there's at
least some hope that they can pump a lit-
Че last-minute competition into a season
that has been embarrassingly short on
challenge for the number one team.
The gap between Kirby-Masakayan
and the rest of the hundred players on
the tour is a vacuum created by a bitter
split within the WPVA two years ago,
when four of its best six players left to
form a women’s bracket that would play
alongside, but not with, the men on the
bigger, richer AVP circuit. The defec-
tions came at a bad time for the women's
league, and if Kirby and Masakayan had
joined the mutiny, it might have sunk
the WPVA altogether.
“It was devastating,” says Kirby. “The
AVP offered a kind of financial security
that the WPVA couldn't, and some play-
ers chose not to stand with the organi
tion that had given them the opportuni-
ty to become professionals. We were in
the same boat financially so we sort of
understood, but it was disappointing.”
“It was hard because they were our
friends,” adds Masakayan. “It wasn't so
much the act of their going as the way
they did it, the things that were said by
people who had been my friends for six,
seven years. When money is laid on the
table, shit comes out of people's mouths
that should not.”
"Volleyball is what we do best,” says
Kirby. “What we are learning is how
much harder it is to control the business.
and the politics that go along with it.”
Five minutes into the game, Kirby and
Masakayan are beginning to do what
they do best. Despite several long points,
several wicked serves by Fontana and a
couple of sand-caüng digs by Kotas-
Forsythe, the power on the other side of
the net begins to put unanswered points
оп the board.
“Karolyn and Liz are so together.
They just play at another level,” says
Melanie Sullivan, a 510” rookie from
Branford, Connecticut. “My partner and
I faced them once this year and got our
first bagel.” (See page 148 for a complete
guide to beach volleyball's indigenous
language.) Then, as if it were part of
some live-ammunition boot-camp exer-
cise, Sullivan shakes her head and says,
“Гуе heard a Liz jump-serve whiz by
my ear."
Оп the court against Fontana and Ko-
tas-Forsythe, the Lizard and her partner
are each doing everything: Masakayan is
serving the guns of Navarone, digging
Kill shots out of the far corners, dumping.
pokeys into whatever small patch of sand
is open. Kirby is Kong at the net for the
blocks and is driving bloody spikes down
the line, down her blockers’ throats and
deep into the crowd on the rebounds. A
half hour into the match they lead 9-3,
which is making the television producer
very happy. Volleyball is traditionally
played without a time clock, to 15 points,
but the win must be by at least a two-
point margin. The live CBS coverage is
scheduled for one hour, which means a
close game might not finish in time. As it
turns out, the worry is wasted: Forty
minutes into the game, Masakayan takes
three steps, goes into the air, ponytail
flying, and sends a screaming serve
down the line to end it 154.
After the awards ceremony ($9400 to
team Kirby-Masakayan, along with their
choice of a Chevy truck or Camaro) most
of the players drift into a beachside bar
called the Sunset for a season’s-end par-
ty. It is a casual do, a chance for the
women to say goodbye for the winter, to
sign one another's programs with the
nicknames they’ve made up: Lisa Gath-
right and Ann Schirman, both 6', are
called Tall and Taller or the Trees; Lucy
Han, at 5'2" the shortest player on the
tour, is Sand Flea; Marla O'Hara, an in-
your-face brown belt big-grunt server, is
Cave Woman; and Chris Schaefer, a
beautiful and spirited 6’ second-year
player, is called Schaef Dog.
Schaefer and her partner, Kengy Gar-
diner, an actress, are among the tour's
comics. “We have to make jokes,” says
Gardiner. “Otherwise, with the work and
the competition, things get too scrious.”
In fact, Gardiner and Schaefer are
credited with one of the game's best
pieces of slang. “We use it when things
are completely flat out there,” says Gar-
diner, “when it's like bad sex—the hard-
er you try, the worse it gets. Our coach
told us that in moments like that, when
we can't get any real enthusiasm going,
we should just fake it. So we just look at
each other and say "diner, you know,
from the scene in When Harry Met Sally
where Meg Ryan shows Billy Crystal
how a woman can fool a man.”
The party atthe Sunset also provides a
chance for fans to buy the 1995 WPVA
calendar and have it autographed by the
featured women. But most of the color
photos don't do the players justice. They
are posed shots—hair done, makeup
perfect, smiles pinned in place—that
miss the natural beauty of these women
in action: luminous with sweat, hair
flying, arms and legs ablur in perfect
athletic abandon as they go about “get-
ting the uniform dirty,” which is their
description of coming up from a point
with their bodies covered with sand.
‘The beauty of these women does, of
course, play a big part in the selling of
the sport, though most of the women I
talk with tell me that the male fans react
to them as athletes rather than as pin-
ups. “Very few guys come up to you to
talk, much less to harass you,”
diner, who is in the calend:
some of them come out thinking, Let's
go watch the bimbos bat the ball around.
After the games, though, most of them
seem a bit intimidated.” Fourth-year
player Krista Blomquist agrees. “I get hit
on in other situations more than I do on
the beach,” she says.
At least one of the players, however,
has suffered the kind of haunting ep-
isode that can put fear into the game for
women athletes. In 1993, at a tourna-
ment in Santa Cruz, California, Elaine
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147
You may not be able to spike it like
the big girls do, but you can speak
their language.
Abusing the equipment: When a player
pulls on the net.
Bagel: A game in which your team
scores zero.
Chicken wing: A reflexive defensive
shot off the arm.
Club Med: Indicates that hitting your
opponents wimpy little shot back
over the net made you feel like you
were on vacation.
Cobra: A dink shot hit with fingertips.
Diner: Said to one's apathetic partner
during a game, meaning to fake it un-
til it comes. From the diner scene in
When Harry Met Sally.
Facial: A hit in the face.
Facial disgracial: A hit in the face that
knocks a player out of the game.
Flipper: Backhanded hit.
French fry: A game in which your
team scores only one point.
Hit it with your purse: Said after an in-
effectual swat at the ball.
Husband and wife: A ball that drops
between teammates and leaves them
saying, “That was yours, wasn't it?”
Bench Вьяпкет Linse
Incoming; also, guns of Navarone: A
brutally hard serve.
Jumbo shrimp: A shot that hooks over
an opponent's head.
Jungle ball: Volleyball as played at pic-
nics; eight or more players to a side.
Kong; also, a Jed (as in Clampett): A
monstrous block.
Pokey: A dink shot hit with knuckles.
Put а stamp on it: When а serve is so
long it will have to be mailed back.
Roof: Blocking the ball straight down.
Scud: A ball that rises.
Six-pack: A hit in the face that draws
blood. (From a Fifties tradition in
which the player who delivered the
bloody hit earned a six-pack of beer.)
Spader: An ace.
Team Advil: Partners who aren't get-
ting along.
Tomahawk: A two-handed spike.
Tool: To score off an opponent's block.
State: i.e., unconscious state, in
which a team can do nothing wrong.
Uno, dos, adios; one, two, barbecue; also,
the sooner you lose, the sooner you bocze:
Losing your first two matches in dou-
ble-elimination format.
* On the beach, two players must
cover exactly the same area that six
players cover indoors.
e It's four times harder to move on
sand than on the hardcourt, and leg
fatigue is doubled.
* You lose about one fifth of your
vertical jump on the beach. “I jump
30 inches indoors,” says Angela Rock,
“24 inches on sand.”
* The outdoor ball is softer, has
bigger panels and is harder on shoul-
ders in the spike. "You just can't hit
the snot out of it,” says Rock, “like
you can the indoor ball.”
dest Line Haroceuar E «cept...
* Inside, the sun doesn’t shine in
your eyes and the wind doesn't knock
a scud five feet off line. But nobody
ever got a tan playing hardcourt.
* In the sand version of the game,
you can serve from anywhere along
the back line, meaning that you can
serve to either opponent straight
ahead or at an angle.
* There are no specialized players
(setter, spiker, etc.) in the beach game
as there are indoors, so your weak-
nesses are multiplied.
* Best ofall, on the beach, most of
the uniform is not only skintight,
it’s skin.
Roque—one of the top women on the
tour—was approached by a 64^, 280-
pound man who handed her a letter full
of weird fantasies about the two of them.
Roque turned over the letter to the FBI
and got a restraining order against the
man. Even so, she says, “I still double-
check my car mirror. I'm always scared.”
Around ten o'clock on the Tuesday
morning afier the WPVA final, the
dozen ог so volleyball nets at Manhat-
tan's Marine Street Beach are busy with
players, from giggle to grunt. Four 12-
year-old girls hold one court, serving
underhand, squealing after wild bloop-
ers, working on their kill shots, which
sometimes go under the net. Next to
them isa serious game among ten 40- to
50-year-old women who gather twice a
week to exercise at their high school
sport. They play well, despite the fact
that age has blurred the edge between
the dive and the fall as they chase the
jumbo-shrimp shots that arc just over
their heads onto the back line.
The rest of the courts are full of pros
and wanna-bes, mostly men, in the mid-
dle of long, brutal workouts for the AVP
final, which is scheduled the following
weekend, at Hermosa Beach, one pier
south of Manhattan. Practice balls litter
the sand beyond the back lines of each
court as the relentless drills—dig, set
and spikc—follow onc another without a
break. This is the hard work all of the
women talk about, the labor that keeps
this life from being as glamorous as it
looks: six, nine, sometimes 12 hours a
week to pump their legs into shape, to
keep the game's skills at an instinctive
place in their muscles. All this in addi-
tion to their full-time jobs.
The most ruthless morning workout is
on the court nearest the water. Holly Mc-
Peak, one of the premiere WPVA players
who left for the AVP, and Lisa Arce, 1994
rookie of the year in the WPVA, are be-
ing worked by Anna Collier, their coach.
Collier is standing on an overturned
trash barrel spiking ball after ball over
the net to start a point. She encourages
the women by yelling, “Go, go, go -
nice hands . . . stretch for it." As the scs-
sion grinds on toward two hours, both
McPeak and Arce stay down longer
when they hit the sand. At the breaks
they bend forward, hands on their
knees, in what I imagine to be both a
resting and praying posture: “Lord, give
me breath.”
As we talk after the workout, Collier,
who coaches women from both tours,
says she thinks the split between the AVP
and the WPVA will eventually heal, per-
haps soon.
"Irll happen because women's volley-
ball needs it to happen if it's going to
reach its full potential as a pro sport,”
she says. “And the bitterness is less than
before you
hit the
sand, take
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it was. Just after the split, somebody
wrote ‘AVP sucks’ on my car. But 1 think
we're past that now.”
“The bitterness is coming from those
who have benefited the most from the
split. They're making more money than
ever before,” says McPeak in a flash of
anger. She catches herself before she
spills details. McPeak is talking about
Kirby and Masakayan, of course, whose
sweep of the 1994 WPVA tour earned
them considerably more (about $80,000
each) than any of the women who joined
the АУР “We left hoping that others
would follow and that the AVP could
help us make women's volleyball а more
professional sport,” says McPeak. “It’s
been frustrating.”
“Anyway,” says Collier, “you heard one
side of the story last weekend. You'll get
the other side in Hermosa.”
“I love playing alongside the men,”
says Angela Rock, а 58" former
Olympian and founding member of the
WPVA. We are standing backstage of
center court on the second day of the
APV Hermosa tournament, and it is an-
other perfect August day: Grandstand
banners are slow-dancing on a breeze
heavy with the smell of suntan oil, and
beach umbrellas cast small spots of shade
onto the sand, which is otherwise too hot
for bare feet. The men’s semifinal is un-
der way, and Rock is speaking over the
roar of a crowd ten times the size of that
at the WPVA final.
“Look at this. It's a beautiful opera-
tion. Great crowds, and we're surround-
ed by professional people who work
hard to make us happy,” she says, ges-
turing toward the players’ tent, where
20 tables are being attended by chiro-
practors and massage therapists.
“It hurt me personally,” she says of the
split. “I was Karolyn's partner and good
friends with many of the other women.
Beach volleyball is going to be included
in the 1996 Olympics, and in a way,
that's a deadline for getting back togeth-
er. AVP women are not sanctioned to
play on the international tour, which
means they won't be cligible for Olympic
play unless something changes.” (In
March 1995 the AVP released the
women under contract to its tour to play
in the WPVA, thereby making them eli-
gible for Olympic competition.)
Rock is waiting to begin the final
match of the AVP women's season, а
game that will decide the 1994 champi-
ons. There are only eight teams, 16
women, on the AVP women's side, and
all four of the finalists are former WPVA
stars. Rock's partner is Nancy Reno, a
four-year Stanford all-American and the
number one ranking AVP women's play-
er. Their opponents are Holly McPeak
and Cammy Ciarelli, one of the most ag-
gressive players on the tour,
As the game begins, the half-full
grandstand tells the story of the two-
year-old AVP women’s tour. The men’s
final will draw an overflow crowd, and
the winners of that match will split a
$100,000 purse and a matching bonus
pool. The winners among the women
will share a purse of less than $15,000
(the same as the 17th-place men's team)
and a bonus pool of about $8000 each.
Though the shortfall of the women's
game may be obvious in audience size
and prize money, there is no evidence of
it on the court after the first serve goes
up. The score is never separated by
more than two points. Just as itlooks like
Rock’s cannonball jump-serve is about to
prevail, McPeak uses her catlike speed to
execute a diving dig, then gets off the
sand and into position for the set from
Ciarelli to spike an angled winner that
Reno cannot reach.
On the breaks they sit in the players’
boxes, listen to their coaches jabber strat-
egy at them, and check the clock—a
nine-minute timer, unique to the AVP
and designed to make the sport a better
television package. Only the action is
timed, and when the clock runs out, the
point leaders win. The womer's final is
being taped by МВС, though only bits of
it will be shown during the live coverage
of the men’s final, which will feature the
brightest stars in the game, Karch Kiraly
and Kent Steffes.
With 1:20 to go. the score is 12-12.
McPeak serves to Reno, who passes to
Rock and then spikes the set into Ciarel-
li's block, which is dug—unbelievably—
by a diving Rock. Rock then takes the set
from Reno, who spikes it into McPeak's
stomach and knocks her on her butt.
The crowd, which has grown as the
men's qualifying matches finish on the
outer courts, comes to its feet roaring.
With 30 seconds on the clock, McPeak
breaks the tie with a short serve that
catches Rock and Reno waiting for the
missile she usually launches. And though
Rock gets another sideout with a perfect
jumbo shrimp over Ciarelli's jumping
reach, it isn't enough. As the clock goes
to zero it’s 14-12, McPeak—Ciarelli.
After the match, 1 sit with Paul Sun-
derland. a former Olympian who grew
up in Malibu playing the beach game
and who is now the broadcast commen-
tator for NBC volleyball coverage.
“When you come down to it,” he says,
“the women's game isn't that different
from the men’s. They all play with pow-
er, finesse, strategy, psychology. And the
womens success will come closer to the
men’s in time. That was great volleyball
we watched out there, which is the key.
These are beautiful, athletic women, but
if it weren't for the competition, they
could play naked and no one would
show up.” He pauses. We look at each
other. “Well, almost no one,” he says.
MENENDEZ
(continued from page 76)
A few days later she phoned A Current
Affair. She told them about Lyle's com-
ment and offered to tape some of her
phone conversations with him for the
show. Then Shelton called Court TV re-
porter Terry Moran, who had covered
the trial, and said she was sympathetic to
Lyle but felt she should do something.
She confessed one other thing to Moran:
She had served time for check fraud.
“You have a record and now you're
clean,” Moran told her. “My advice
would be to stay out of this.” Shelton
didn’t take that advice. The next day she
phoned Vanity Fairs Dominick Dunne.
Dunne was more than happy to feature
Shelton's account of Lyle’s “snowed half
the country” remark in his next Menen-
dez article. However, he made no men-
tion of her criminal past. Shelton was de-
scribed as “a working single mother, with
а two-year-old son, who had been in
constant telephone contact with Lyle
Menendez throughout the trial.” Lyle
told his attorneys he had only two con-
versations with Shelton and insisted he
never uttered the “snowed” line.
Meanwhile, A Current Affair reportedly
provided Shelton with recording equip-
ment and paid her $1000 for taping her
conversations with Lyle. Shelton denies
she received money from the show. The
calls were taped, she says, because other-
wise no one would believe somebody
with a criminal record. On March 16,
1994 the show introduced a story about
“a call that could possibly turn Lyle
Menendez into a convicted murderer.”
In an interview with reporter John
Johnston, Shelton's story changed slight-
ly from the one she told Vanity Fair. Now,
Lyle said, “We have half the jury
snowed.” In other revelations, Shelton
claimed Lyle called Erik “a pussy who
just shot up the bookcase.” And there
was more.
“If my phone calls from jail had been
monitored, the jury never would have
come back hung,” she claimed Lyle told
her. “If I go to prison for the rest of my
life, my brother is going with me.” John-
ston reported that Shelton's tapes were
now “at the center of the prosccution
case.” In а parting shot, Shelton turned
to the camera and addressed her former
confidant: “I hope you get what you de-
serve.” (Because of legal concerns, the
TV show didn’t broadcast any of the
tapes.)
But in another interview a month lat-
er, Shelton told reporter Harvey Levin
the “snowed” line had been said only in
jest while Lyle was “joking around" the
night of the mistrial. Shelton said she
“felt guilty” about taping many of her
phone calls but since she had “a police
record as long as a DC-9 airplane,” she
fretted, “who's going to believe me?” At
the request of California officials, Shel-
ton was pressured in Virginia to turn
over her audiotapes to the Beverly Hills
police. The tapes were never played
publicly—there was nothing of impor-
tance on them.
Shelton also had recorded several calls
with Abramson while trying to raise
money for the defense fund. “Miss Shel-
ton was not a developed witness,” de-
dared Abramson at a pretrial hearing.
“She is reaching out for her 15 minutes
of fame.”
LYLE MAKES ANOTHER FRIEND
During the pretrial hearings, the
courtroom presence of Menendez family
members and friends dwindled to one
faithful advocate: Norma Belly Novelli.
The native of England and mother of
four grown children had lived in south-
ern California for 15 years. She pub-
lished Mind’s Eye, a small monthly news-
paper circulated in local jails and state
prisons. In June 1990 Lyle wrote the
newspaper to comment on an article
critical of Pope John Paul И
“From your various artides and your
paper's structural tone, I believe we
would get along quite well,” he added in
a personal postscript. Norma and Lyle
became friends through a series of let-
ters and phone calls. She cheerfully
served as а telephone operator for him,
setting up conference calls with his
friends. In those early conversations,
Lyle frequently boasted he would soon
be out of jail. His plans included moving:
to Florida and buying a Ferrari. He
asked Novelli to save all the media cov-
erage—someday he wanted to show
everything to his grandchildren. To
Novelli, Lyle frequently seemed more
preoccupied with his media image than
with the case against him.
At one of the pretrial hearings in early
1993, Novelli displayed a valentine card
with a shiny, mirror-like front she was
sending her favorite prisoner. “It’s good
for shaving,” she said. “They aren't al-
lowed to have mirrors in jail.” When a
friend noticed that Lyle appeared to be
developing dark circles around his eyes,
Lyle asked Novelli to bring him makeup.
She advised him that it wasn't such a
good idea. Lyle also complained about
the preppie way the defense team made
him dress. It just wasn't him. Hi:
clothes—including the expensive Italian
loafers his attorneys didn't want him
wearing in the courtroom—were in
storage. Novelli says that he requested
a copy of GQ so he could offer his attor-
neys a fashion lesson.
One day, less than a month before ju-
ry selection, Novelli was seething with
anger outside the courthouse. One of
the defense attorneys had asked her to
stop attending pretrial hearings. “People
will think you have something to do with
Lyle,” was the explanation. “I have
something to do with Lyle. I'm not going
to disappear!” she exclaimed. "I want it
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to look like they have some supporters.
I'm in control of my tongue.”
Novelli frequently wore short skirts
and white go-go boots to court. Some-
times, she dressed in provocative outfits
while visiting Lyle in jail. Menendez fam-
ily members believe Novelli developed
a "romantic fixation” for Lyle. "It's
disgusting,” said one family member
during the trial. “What is this 54-year-
old woman doing chasing after a 25-year-
old man?"
“I have two things in life: publishing
Mind's Eye and taking care of Lyle,” No-
velli said just before the trial. “Не calls
me several times a day and I visit him in
jail three times a week. I'm the only per-
son who visits him. When you're in jail,
you find out who your friends are.”
Lyle recently discovered the true
meaning of Norma Novelli's friendship.
She has written a book based on tran-
scripts from the four ycars she surrcpti-
tiously recorded his three-way phone
calls. The publisher, Dove Books, is the
same company that released Faye Res-
nick’s tabloid tell-all about Nicole Simp-
son. Dove co-founder Michael Viner told
Newsweek that Novelli’s tapes “will put
Lyle away for good.” And this past Feb-
ruary, Novelli voluntarily turned over to
the Los Angeles County district attorney
15 hours of taped phone calls that Lyle
had made.
Defense attorneys say the tapes con-
tain no “smoking guns” nor anything
about fabricating a defense. “People will
be disappointed,” Novelli told one mem-
ber of the defense team. She also said
she was annoyed with Dove for embel-
lishing the significance of her record-
ings. Novelli has been listed as a prose-
cution witness, but it’s unlikely that the
illegally recorded tapes will be admitted
as evidence at the trial.
OJ. PAYS A VISIT
At 10:20 p.m. on June 17, 1994 O.J.
Simpson arrived at the Los Angeles
County Men's Central Jail. He was tak-
en toa small, isolated pod of seven cells.
Instead of a 5700-square-foot mansion
in Brentwood, his new home was a
63-square-foot cell, painted institutional
green, with a metal toilet, sink and bed
with a thin mattress and no pillow. The
metal door has a square window and a
small flap, about eight inches high,
through which food trays can be passed.
"Ihe 7000 High Power Unit, on the
jail's second floor, is sometimes called
“celebrity row” because prominent pris-
oners such as Christian Brando, Sean
Penn and Charles Keating have been
housed there. It is separated from the
general jail population for safety rea-
sons. Within a few hours after being
incarcerated, O.J. Simpson, prisoner
#4013970, met his new neighbor, pris-
опег #1878449, а.К.а. Erik Menendez.
Erik knew something was up earlier
that day. On Friday afternoon, sheriff's
deputies ordered him (along with two
other inmates on the hallway) to scrub
the floors and walls of the entire seven-
cell pod. Erik had been preoccupied for
weeks writing a science fiction novel, and
he didnt like the interruption.
As he scoured the floor, Erik watched
TV coverage of the Simpson saga, in-
cluding the dramatic reading of О.].5
goodbye letter and the slow-speed chase.
нер!
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oR Two?
“I almost cried when his suicide letter
was read on TV,” said Erik. “It was very
sad—tears came to my eyes. It reminded
me of Lyle and me.” Just before 10:30
P.M., the entire jail was locked down. А
group of deputies led by two sergeants
escorted the former football hero to the
cell next to Erik’s.
The first night was rough. “I didn't see
OJ. crying, but 1 believe he was,” Erik
told me from jail a few days later. “I
could hear him moaning. I felt very bad
for him.” A few hours after Simpson's ar-
rival, Erik overheard him talking about
his case with one of the deputies. A
deputy and a sergeant were stationed on
“suicide watch,” sitting on chairs directly
outside his cell. A few minutes later,
Simpson called out to his neighbor.
“Hey, Erik, it's O.J.!”
“OK, O.J., let me explain a few things
about jail to you," Erik replied.
“I told him not to talk to the deputies
or inmates about the case. I told him not.
to worry, that everything would be all
right. Just relax. Nothing drastic is go-
ing to happen to you any time soon.’ Af-
ter that long chase, you can imagine
what shape he was in."
By Saturday morning, the impact of
the week's events were consuming the
despondent Simpson. “He wasn’t happy
to be in jail,” said Erik. “He wasn't any
worse than I was or Lyle was. He was
delusional, thinking that he was going to
get outin three weeks or three months.”
Erik sull occasionally heard moaning
from the adjacent cell. Between visits
from attorney Robert Shapiro and psy-
chiatrist Saul Facrstein, Simpson spent
hours making calls on a portable phone.
Erik told OJ. that he and Lyle had
met the football star when their father
was an executive at Hertz in the late Sev-
enties, but O.J. didn't remember the en-
counter with the young boys.
Later that day the two neighbors
spoke again. Simpson told Erik he was
worried about the loss of his prestige. “I
guess I won't be working for NBC any-
more,” he said. “He was worried about
his reputation and that he was being
slandered,” said Erik. “I just told him
that he was going to have to deal with
the media.” Throughout the day, Simp-
son and Menendez peered through the
open door flaps, watching the news cov-
erage on a TV set across the hall from
their cells,
By Sunday morning, the two men saw
their cases linked together by the man
prosecuting them. District Attorney Gil
Сагсеш was appearing on This Week With
David Brinkley to offer his opinion about
the Simpson defense strategy.
“Well, it's not going to shock me if we
see an О.]. Simpson sometime down the
road say, ‘OK, I did it, but I'm not re-
sponsible.’ We've seen it in Menendez. It's
going to be a likely defense here, 1 be-
lieve, once the evidence is reviewed by
the lawyers.”
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PLAYBOY
154
Erik was indignant that Garcetti com-
pared the two cases. "Не kept bringing it
up, as if my name is synonymous with
some sort of thinking—here's another ‘I
did it but don't blame me kind of thing.”
It was really aggravating.”
A few days later Erik and ОЈ. had а
conversation about legal representation.
Erik was unhappy about his own surren-
der, which Shapiro had arranged in
March 1990. Erik was playing tourna-
ment tennis in Israel when he received
the news of Lyle’s arrest. He immediate-
ly flew to London, where he debated his
next move with relatives and legal advi-
sors back in the U.S. It was decided that
Erik would voluntarily surrender in Los
Angeles. He later discovered that had he
surrendered in London, where there is
no capital punishment, the death penal-
ty would have been ruled out as a condi-
tion of his extradition. He blamed
Shapiro for making the wrong call.
“Don’t ever believe Bob Shapir
ing to get you a deal, because he isn't,”
Erik said he told O.J. “Nobody knows
who's the best lawyer. Everyone can talk
a good line.” Erik felt he'd been fortu-
nate to replace Shapiro with Abramson.
What Erik had no way of knowing was
that Abramson was at that moment jock-
eying—along with many other promi-
nent criminal attorneys—to be named to
the Sumpson defense team.
A handful of people are connected to
both murder cases. Faerstein was with
OJ. Че day he fled from Robert Kar-
dashian's house. Mark Slotkin, an an-
tique dealer and contractor and friend
of O.J.'s who has appeared on numerous
TV shows insisting on Simpson's inno-
cence, was a Menendez defense witness
in the first trial. Slotkin had sold Jose
Menendez his Beverly Hills mansion,
and both brothers approached him for
business advice after killing their par-
ents. Kato Kaelin’s attorney, William
Genego, also testified as an expert wit-
ness on an obscure legal point. Retired
porno star Jennifer Peace appeared in
front of a grand jury after claiming her
former boyfriend, A.C. Cowlings, told
her about О. |. Simpson's involvement in
his wife's murder. Peace camped out
overnight with Screw publisher Al Gold-
stein (who once dated Judalon Smyth) to
get a seat for Erik Menendez’ dramatic
testimony. In the ultimate intersection of
the stories, Erik and Lyle’s grandmother,
Maria Menendez, had a brief meeting
with O.J.'s mother, Eunice, in the wait-
ing room at the county jail. The women
hugged as they wished each other well.
THE GAY QUESTION.
Prosecutors tried to turn Erik's sexual
identity into one of the lingering myster-
ies of Menendez I. In a closed hearing
the last week of the trial, deputy D.A.
Lester Kuriyama hoped to prove Erik
was gay. He asked permission to bring in
a county jail inmate who would testify
that he'd performed oral sex on Erik in
the jail’s shower room.
Kuriyama also sought testimony from
a photographer who'd shot a modeling
portfolio of what prosecutors considered
to be suggestive pictures. Although the
“We went out a few times, but we just couldn't recapture
the intensity we had on the Internet."
photo contact sheet contains mostly
head shots, there are also pictures of a
shirtless Erik in an open jean jacket and
another of him wearing only white cot-
ton briefs—a takeoff of the Calvin Klein
ad. "It offends me that a molested child
is being blamed this way for the perver-
sion of his molester,” said Abramson. Af-
ter an angry debate, Judge Stanley Weis-
berg denied Kuriyama’s requests.
Dominick Dunne interviewed the
photographer, Philip Kearney, looking
for evidence of what he called Erik's
“possible homosexuality.” Kearney said
he'd shot the portfolio in 1988 when
Erik was considering becoming a model
or actor. “Did you have an affair with
Erik?” Dunne asked Kearney. “Spiritual-
ly, yes. Physically, almost,” he replied.
Vanity Fair reportedly paid $10,000 to
run the underwear picture.
Although the controversial evidence
wasn't allowed in court, Kuriyama sug-
gested in closing statements that Erik's
homosexuality was the real Menendez
family secret. “Homosexuality is a per-
sonal choice,” he said. Over defense ob-
jections, Kuriyama then hinted that Erik
was gay. “If Erik indeed engaged in
consensual homosexual activities, that
would account for his ability to describe
the sexual encounters with his father,”
Kuriyama said.
Lyle reportedly told a friend that he
worried that Erik was bisexual. Erik in-
sists he's not gay.
CLASH OF THE TITANS
The caustic feud between Vanity Fair's
Dominick Dunne and Leslie Abramson
began early in the trial. The day after
opening statements, Dunne appeared
оп Good Morning America. Shortly before
the morning session began, the diminu-
tive writer approached the equally
diminutive Abramson and asked, “Did
you see the plug I gave you this morning
on TV?” “Nicky, I don't need any plugs,”
Abramson replied coolly.
The day after the mistrial, Abramson
described him as “the little puke, the lit-
tle closet queen” in a posttrial interview
she set up with jurors sympathetic to the
defense. Dunne had become a cheer-
leader for the prosecution, keeping the
anti-Menendez media juggernaut going
strong for months following the mistrial.
No one could accuse Dunne of being
an uninvolved reporter when he wrote:
“If Jose did stick needles and tacks into
his son’s thighs and buttocks, why didn't
Erik bleed? I tried sticking a thumbtack
into my buttocks and 1 bled.”
Dunne feigns disdain for Abramson
but loves to write about her continuing
criticism of his credentials. In various
Menendez articles, he quotes a speech in
which “she called me a liar and said that
1 had made up facts,” retells an insult
about himself from a BBG documentary
and reprints every mention she made of
him during the course of the trial. He
even published an excerpt from the
book proposal for Abramson’s forthcom-
ing autobiography.
Dunne has also tweaked her for mak-
ing a reported $4000 a day as an O.J.
commentator for ABC News. Of course,
Dunne may be envious. He’s providing
courtroom play-by-play for the less pres-
tigious Good Morning America and the lo-
cal CBS affiliate in L.A. But Dunne still
has clout. He and Joe McGinnis—an
author whose controversial journalism
has resulted in best-sellers about Ted
Kennedy and convicted murderer Jef
frey MacDonald—have been given front
row seats for the Simpson trial. Local news-
papers are seated several rows behind
“Here you have southern California's
three leading newspaper companies rel-
egated to the cheap seats while the front
row is reserved for Judith Krantz in
pants and Ted Kennedy's unauthorized
mind reader,” complained Copley News
reporter Paul Pringle to the Los Angeles
Times. “Dunne’s a professional gossip,
and it seems like McGinnis ought to be
able to read O.J.'s mind from anywhere
inthe courtroom."
"It's perfect," chortled Abramson.
“Judy and Judas together in the front
row. What a team."
JAILHOUSE ROCK
As for the brothers, March 8 marked
the fifth anniversary of Lyle's arrest.
While Erik has been busy writing, Lyle
needs more energy around him. When
possible, he spends hours on the phone
chatting with relatives, supporters, girl-
friends and strangers who've written
him letters.
Before the trial, Lyle served as a jail
trustee, delivering meals and distribut-
ing mail to fellow prisoners. He pre-
ferred it to being locked in a cell all day.
At one point, Lyle Menendez became a
tourist attraction, а popular diversion
when visitors would tour the jail.
"They used to bring mé out as a
spokesperson, he says. "They would
bring me around the corner and sort of
parade me like the Elephant Man or
something. People were shocked. I don't
think they actually expected to meet me.
"The kids would all be excited, and I ac-
tually didn't mind it."
"They would recognize me immedi-
ately and I wouldn't be handcuffed or
anything,” he said. “I would just stand
there with a few deputies and we would
joke around. They allowed them to ask
me questions and then they would say,
"What's it like? It must be a big switch
for you, being in jail. How do they treat
you in here?’ Obviously, I couldn't say
that they beat me down every day or
something.”
Lyle already had a taste of celebrity life
before becoming a stop on the jail tour.
Fellow inmates frequently asked for an
autograph. Among the other renowned
prisoners he has met on celebrity row
are Charles Manson (brought in for
а two-day hearing), Reginald Denny
beating defendant Damian Williams and
funk star Rick James. (Lyle claims to
have co-written a few songs with James.)
“Coming to jail was the greatest thing
that ever happened to me after my par-
ents died,” Erik said in a conversation
from the Los Angeles County Men's Jail.
“ТЕТ would not have come here, I prob-
ably would have been dead by now. I'm
not quite sure I'd have committed sui-
cide, but I don’t think I would have been
able to last this long. After the relation-
ship with Oziel failed, I had no one to
turn to.”
Lyle has his own ideas. “Clearly, their
best theory is hatred. I don’t think that’s
going to hold up because the events sur-
rounding August 20, 1989—within a few
months before and after—don't support
it,” he says, “There were too many good
things going on in my life for me to toss
it for that reason. I'm not a guy who hat-
ed, and I'm not a guy who even express-
es anger very well. I hope my own feel-
ings—the mixed feelings about the
whole thing coming out—will make a
difference for the jury.”
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156
DENNIS FRANZ (continued from page 114)
“Vietnam was a terrifying, life-altering experience,
yel I wouldn't trade it for anything in the world.”
investigation, he visits the dead boy's
parents, who in their grief embrace the
belief that their son's soul has taken resi-
dence in a bird perched on their win-
dowsill. They want to know what Sipo-
wicz thinks. It was a difficult scene for
Franz—because of the conflicting per-
spectives Sipowicz brought to it as father
and cop, because central to Sipowicz'
persona is a disdain for self-delusion,
and because Milch was súll rewriting,
handing Franz his lines on the back ofan
envelope.
“Dennis was able to convey Sipowicz’
impatience with the parents’ mendacity,”
Milch recalls, “yet express his empathy
by looking at the bird and telling them
he thinks he can see a light coming out
of it. It was amazing. There were а lot of
ways to do the scene badly, but Dennis
found a way to do it well.”
In short, the light radiated from
Franz, What made the light so strong
was not just its beneficence but its au-
thority, too, an authority forged during a
traumatic time the actor rarely discusses.
Ona rainy morning several days after
he received his Golden Globe, and sever-
al weeks after the nation got its look at
his backside, Franz was padding around
his spacious home in Bel Air. The house
where television's fiercest lawman lives,
it turns out, looks more like an antique
shop than a precinct station. Over the
years, at swap meets and estate sales,
Franz and Joanie have amassed a sizable
trove. Much of it goes under the heading
of Country Cute—old railroad signs,
cow tchotchkes, bottle racks, American
flag pillows, vintage radios, an enameled
turn-of-the-century stove. АЙ of it means
something to its owners, most particular-
ly an upright piano they bought for $35
at an auction in Lake of the Ozarks, Mis-
souri, loaded into a U-Haul trailer and
drove home through a blizzard only to
discover it would cost $1600 to refur-
bish. Suffice it to say, six years later the
piano sits on the porch, untouched.
In the midst of his tour, the doorbell
rang and Franz answered. Congratula-
tions for the Golden Globe were still
pouring in—this one in the form of a
bottle of Cristal champagne from Ted
Harbert, president of ABC. Consider-
ing everything NYPD Blue has done for
the network, the champagne seemed a
rather paltry gesture.
“It was a super porno movie, Frank. Let’s not spoil it.”
After scanning Harbert's note, Franz
puffed out his chest, cocked an eye and
let loose a barrage worthy of Sipowicz:
“This is all I'm worth to you, Ted? This is
it? Where are the car keys?
“This is nice, but what happened
to the days when they gave you a car?
I could use a new four-wheel-drive
vehicle.”
For an instant, Franz seemed genuine-
ly perturbed. But then he smiled, for he
knew that ABC would begin expressing
its gratitude two mornings later. A lim-
ousine would whisk him to the waiting
Learjet in which he, Bochco, Jimmy
Smits and Bill Clark—the former New
York cop who works as NYPD Blue's
technical advisor—would Ну to Miami
for a Super Bowl weekend that would in-
clude dinner with Diane Sawyer and
other network notables, a round of golf
with Harbert, nonstop soirees and, al-
most as an afterthought, a football game.
The Cristal was merely a prelude.
After pouring coffee, Franz walked in-
to the den where his dogs, Bigelow and
Gallagher—mammoth husky mixes,
one of whom had recently lost a leg to
cancer—were lolling around. Outside,
visible through a sliding door, rain
danced across the dark surface of a
swimming pool.
Unlike so many actors, Franz does not
revel in self-revelation. Though not ex-
actly guarded, he is neither insecure
enough to seek validation through con-
fession nor egotistical enough to pre-
sume others are really that interested.
Yes, he has tales to tell, but he doesn’t
force them on you, especially if they in-
volve Vietnam.
In much the same way that Franz’
friends are in accord that he is a prince
among men, they're also in accord that,
to a one, they didn't learn about his ser-
vice in Vietnam until years after they
met him. With Milch, who's worked with
the actor on NYPD Blue, Hill Street Blues
and the short-lived Beverly Hills Buntz, it
took a decade. Even then, he says, Franz
was cryptic about it all. With Joe Man-
tegna it took three years, and the con-
versation was likewise brief. It ended
when Mantegna, who'd opposed the
war, realized he had no frame of refer-
ence from which to respond. “What
could I say?” he asks. “Bummer?”
When apprised of his friends’ una-
nimity on the subject, Franz seemed
somewhat taken aback. But then he ad-
mitted; “It's not something I preface a
relationship with. I don't say, ‘Hi, I'm
Dennis Franz and [ went to Vietnam.’
But if I'm asked, I don't hold back. It
wasa terrifying, life-altering experience,
yet I wouldn't trade it for anything in the
world.”
It was 1968, and Franz had recently
graduated from Southern Illinois Uni-
versity with a degree in drama and
speech. His student deferment up, the
draft board calling, he enlisted. After
basic training at Fort Dix he entered
officer candidate school. Franz takes
pains not to paint himself as a would-be
hero but as a confused and terrified
young man whose actions were predicat-
ed on a desire to avoid combat. “It was
strictly out of fear,” he said. “I did not
want to get shot. The plan was to get in-
to special services and somehow enter-
tain the troops.”
Franz’ illusions, however, were soon
dashed. There was no hope of hoofing
his way through the war—the Army
wanted its second lieutenants at the
front. And Franz realized he wasn't cut
out to be a leader of men. So three weeks
into officer candidate school, he request-
ed reassignment to infantry duty. The
next day, he was ordered to Vietnam—
orders, he confides, he almost
obeyed. “I was duc to ship out of Oak-
land, but I had a friend living in San
Francisco, and there couldn't have been
a worse choice in 1969 than between
Haight-Ashbury and Saigon. I was three
days late reporting. I toyed with the idea
of going AWOL. Butit's not in my make-
up. I couldn't disgrace my family. I
couldn't live a life always looking over
my shoulder.”
In country, Franz was assigned to a re-
con unit of the 82nd Airborne and was
soon immersed in the fighting. “Our pri-
mary function was to set up ambushes
along enemy trails," he recalled evenly.
“Ar night, we went out in 15-man teams
and stood in rice paddics with the water
up to our waists. We received fire and
dispersed fire, sometimes into darkness,
sometimes at targets.”
After five months in the Mekong delta,
the 82nd pulled out. Franz was detached
to а unit of the 1015: Airborne, which
was patrolling wooded terrain. There,
he saw his worst action.
“1 had a couple experiences 1 remem-
ber pretty vividly,” he said, pulling Big-
elow between his knees.
“One time, we were walking down a
road. That was wrong. We usually went
down the sides. But we'd been climbing
up through trees, and it was a luxury to.
walk down a road. I was next to the last
man in line. We'd all passed this point. I
was carrying my rifle at the ready, and
the guy behind me yelled, ‘Denny, why
you carrying your rifle like that? Sling it
over your shoulder and enjoy the walk?
Fifteen seconds later, there was а huge
explosion, and I saw the guy who had
just spoken to me ten feet in the air, his
leg going in the other direction. He'd
stepped on a land mine. He lost a leg, an
arm and his eyesight. The most frighten-
ing thing about it was that we'd all just
walked over the same point. We had all
walked over the mine. He was just be-
hind me.
“There was another occasion,” Franz
went on, “where we were in a village
conducting a cordon search for VC. It
was daytime, and we were going from
hut to hut looking for any info indicating
they were there—guns, bullets, military
clothing. We were quite unsuccessful,
but they were there. That night, our po-
sition came under attack. I was in the
dirt, trying to crawl right into the dirt,
holding my rifle over my head and
firing. Next to me I heard people get-
ting hit, screaming. Bullets were going
right over my head. I was shaking invol-
untarily, but I kept firing, not necessari-
ly to kill anyone but because that was the
only way to make it stop. I had to make it
stop. The next day, we returned to the
village, and it was like the day before. No
sign of them. That was the frustration of
the war.
Upon the completion of his tour of
duty, Franz was honorably discharged.
Back in Chicago, he experienced some
of the difficulties that afflicted other
Vietnam vets. “Having subjected your-
self to all that to save others—or so we
naively thought—and come back and try
to adjust to the hostility directed at us
was hard,” he said. “I had to try and un-
derstand that behavior and in some cas-
es forgive it. 1 spent a year not doing
much.”
But Franz re-entry problems notwith-
standing, he returned from Vietnam un-
scathed. While he may not have relished
the war, he relished having served. “I
did it. Stood up to it. Came back,” he
said. “I left my youth behind. I was no
longer a boy. I had earned a certain
sense of manhood.”
With that, Franz rose from the sofa
and walked into the kitchen for another
cup of coffee, a man who will talk about
Vietnam after all but doesn’t need to.
Which, not to profane the sacred, breeds
the kind of confidence that most actors
would kill for,
Whatever confusion Franz felt thase
first few months back from Vietnam, he
was on his feet by 1972, making а con-
certed effort at launching his acting ca-
reer. Initially, he worked the Chicago
dinner-theater circuit, appearing in such
period pieces as Luv. Then, in his life's
pivotal creative turn, he landed a partin
the Organic Theater's production of Ray
Bradbury's The Wonderful Ice Cream Suit.
Headquartered in Chicago's tough
Uptown section, the Organic was at the
time the city’s premiere art-theater com-
pany, a precursor to Steppenwolf. Here,
director Stuart Gordon—who would lat-
er become known for writing Honey, Г
Shrunk the Kids—assembled a cadre of
talented actors and staged numerous
original works. The most notable pro-
duction was Bleacher Bums, the story of a
group of long-suffering Chicago Cubs
fans that went on to a profitable second
life as a touring show (it ran for 11 years
in Los Angeles) and was made into
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a PBS movie.
The Organic attracted the usual pot-
smoking, war-protesting artistes. Except
Franz. “He was very solid, Mr. Status
Quo,” recalls Joe Mantegna, who was
one of the ensemble’s mainstays. To be-
gin with, Franz owned a car—not any
car but a new Chevy, on which he made
monthly payments. If that wasn't far out
enough, he had a day job as a security
guard at the Pick-Congress, a downtown
convention hotel. In other words, the
latest recruit to this band of countercul-
ture gypsies was a house dick.
Yet, no matter how out of place Franz
might have seemed initially at the Or-
ganic, he soon established himself as one
Of its stars, winning numerous excellent
notices, particularly for his work in
Bleacher Bums (for which he also received
a writing credit). Moreover, he began de-
veloping the acting style that would sus-
tain him, a style that plainly lent itself to
portraying policemen.
“There was just something about
him,” remembers Mantegna. “One of
the plays we did together was called
Cops. As research, we would drive
around the neighborhood in an old
Buick to get a sense of what it was like to
be on patrol. We'd pull up to a group of
hookers on the corner, and all Dennis
had to do was roll down the window and
stare at them, and they’d squeal, ‘We
ain't doing nothing.’ Dennis would say,
Just watch ourselves” And it sounded
authentic.
Alter five years at the Organic, Franz
was ready to take a shot at Hollywood.
So, too, was Mantegna, and they drove
west together. Mantegna and his wife
towed Franz’ car behind their own, while
Franz drove the U-Haul truck that car-
ried the two households’ belongings.
On the coast, Franz found that his
gritty stage presence was a double-edged
sword—it got him work, but it also got
him typecast. The cop in Brian De Pal-
ma's The Fury (1978)—that was Franz.
The detective in De Palma's Dressed to
Kill (1980)—that, too, was Franz. The
airport security chief in Die Hard 2
(1990) —Franz again. In all, Franz has
played 28 different lawmen. Still, as con-
fining as the roles may often have been,
it was while playing a cop that he en-
tered Steven Bochco's orbit.
Though Sal Benedetto skulked
through only a few episodes of Hill Street
Blues, he was one of the most idiosyn-
cratic characters ever to be written into а
show famous for idiosyncratic charac-
ters. Bad to the bone, a disgrace to his
shield, he came to a grimly memorable
end. Caught in the process of trying to
rob a bank, he went mano а mano with a
bomb-squad robot. Then, as Officer J.D.
LaRue (Kiel Martin) urged him on, he
committed suicide,
Bochco and company immediately rc-
gretted dispatching Benedetto—not so
much because they missed him as a char-
acter but because they missed working
with Franz. And from that day forth,
they cast the actor whenever they could.
In the short-lived baseball drama Bay
City Blues, Franz appeared as pitching
coach Angelo Carbone. Then, when
MTM productions fired Bochco at the
end of Hill Street's fifth year, his replace-
ments—Milch and Jeffrey Lewis—
brought back Franz as Norman Buntz,
an oleaginous, polyester-clad detective
whom Milch characterizes as “Benedetto
benignly mutated 20 percent.” Buntz,
who was accompanied almost every-
where by a trusty snitch named Sid (Pe-
ter Jurasik), proved to be such a hit that
when Hill Street finally came to an end in
1987, Milch and Lewis gave Franz his
own series, Beverly Hills Вит. The spin-
off, though, did not win a wide audience
and was canceled afier 13 episodes. Yet
Franz emerged untarnished, and when
Bochco and Milch reunited to do NYPD
Blue, he was, of course, at the top of
their list.
Franz obviously relishes the success of
NYPD Blue and relishes playing Andy
Sipowicz. “I'm riding this thing until the
end,” he maintains. “I think so much of
the writers, the producers and the show.
There's so much still to explore with
Sipowicz.” Yet he adds that if he never
portrays another cop, it won't be too
soon. And he may not have to. With
the recognition and the ratings come,
of course, opportunities. In February,
Franz played attorney Kichard “Касе-
horse” Haynes in the miniseries Texas
Justice. In May, he hosted Saturday Night
Live. Meanwhile, he’s been cast as one of
the three leads in Tristar's forthcoming:
feature production of David Mamet's
American Buffalo.
Quite simply, it’s been a sweet year for
Franz. “There comes a time when me-
tabolism, numerical age and enthusiasm
all mesh,” he reflects. “For me, it didn't
happen when I was 20. It’s happening
now.” And the best part of it had nothing
to do with Hollywood.
To characterize Franz’ romantic life as
unsettled wouldn't be exactly right. He
and Joanie Zeck have been together for
13 years. To say that he's had a problem
with commitment would also be in error,
as he has not only lived under the same
roof with her for most of that period, but
also has acted as a father to her two
daughters. And yet Franz had never рї
en any sign of being the marrying kind.
Indeed, throughout the relationship's
first decade, he kept his own apartment
in Los Angeles’ Fairfax district. True, he
never spent a night in the place, using it
chiefly as a retreat where he could read
scripts and listen to music. Yet he held
оп to it defiantly, much as а man might
hold on to ап unrealized fantasy. It was a
last bastion of independence.
Late in 1993, however, Franz gave up
his bachelor pad, prompting friends to
nod knowingly. No one, however, was
prepared for what he would do at his
50th birthday party a few months later.
Least of all Franz.
Joanie, a tough, redheaded fireball
who's in the corporate promotions busi-
ness, had rented a room for 200 at a San
Fernando Valley restaurant, transform-
ing it into an homage to Franz. The walls
were covered with blown-up photo-
graphs from his childhood. The tables
were topped by chocolate centerpieces
shaped to resemble TVs, the screens
filled by a likeness of the birthday boy.
And as a final touch, a Hirschfeld carica-
ture of Franz had been etched into the
champagne glasses at the head table.
Alll of Franz’ family and friends were
in attendance, as were most of the gangs
from Hill Street Blues and NYPD Blue:
Steven Bochco and David Milch, Jimmy
Smits, Sharon Lawrence, Nick Turtur-
ro, Peter Jurasik, Charlie Haid, Bruce
Weitz, Joe Spano.
Not surprisingly, there was much
drinking, much dancing and, at the end,
much toasting—most eloquently from
Joe Mantegna.
“Schlachta is 50,” Mantegna ex-
claimed as an opener.
Then, more solemnly, he saluted
Franz as a friend, actor and “the man
who 30 years ago, when we were smok-
ing pot and saying what a horrible coun-
try this is, was running around in rice
paddies on the other side of the world so
that today, we could all sit here together
in this beautiful room.
“Dennis, if you were my brother, I
couldn't love you more.”
With emotions running high, a
sharply attired but nervous Franz took
the stage.
“Joanie, come up here,” he began, and
she did.
Then, with Joanie by his side, he said:
“This is gonna knock me out. I'm totally
unprepared for this. 1 don’t have any-
thing in my pocket, but—in front of all
of you—will you marry me?”
‘There was, of course, bedlam. Not un-
til the pandemonium died down was
Franz again able to be heard: “She said
yes.” Six months later the two ex-
changed vows.
And so in the same year, Dennis
Franz—a man not given to exhibition-
ism, a man for whom restraint is still a
virtue—had twice bared all. To the tele-
vision audience, he'd shown that part of
himself upon which the sun does not
shine. To his wife-to-be, he'd exposed his
heart. In each instance, the response
had been profoundly affirming. At 50,
Franz had chosen the exact right mo-
ment to reveal both the man within and
the man without.
WHERE
ном т
PLAYBOY expands your pur-
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list of retailers and manufac-
turers you can contact for in-
formation on where to find this
month's merchandise. To buy the
apparel and equipment shown
оп pages 24, 28-29, 70-73,
100-101, 103-105, 126-127
and 161, check the listings be-
low to find the stores nearest you.
to Shore”:
By Columbia Sports, 800-622-
6953. By Tommy Hilfiger, at department
and specialty stores. By Team One, 800-v1P-
GEAR. By Dash, at John Forsyth Co., Inc.,
1466 Broadway, NYC, 219-382-9244, By
Nautica, at Nautica, 216 Columbus Ave.
NYC, 212-496-0933. "Eco-Comfort"
Jeans: By Giorgio Armani, at A/X Armani
Exchange stores. By Redford, at Sara, 1394
Montana Ave., Santa Monica, CA, 310-
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Fog, at London Fog Outlet stores. Under-
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at Calvin Klein stores. Blazer by Christian.
Dior, at Christian Dior, 703 Fifth Ave.,
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Pages 100-101: Jacket and trousers by
Calvin Klein Collection, at Calvin Klein
stores. Linen shirt by Joseph Abboud Collec-
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Boston, 617-266-4200. Tie by Best of Class
by Robert Talbott, at Robert Talbott stores.
Loafers by Hush Puppies, 800-433-HUSH.
Belt by Barneys New York, at Barneys New
York stores. Jacket and trousers by Joseph
Abboud Collection, at Joseph Abboud,
Boston. Shirt and tie by Agnes b., at
b., 116 Prince St, NYC, 219-334-0965.
Belt by Brone Private Label, at Tyrone. 76
Spruce St., Cedarhurst, МУ, 516-569-
3330. Oxfords by To Boot, from To Boot at
Bergdorf Goodman, 745 Filth Ave., NYC,
212-339-3335. Sunglasses by Revo, 800-
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Smith, at Paul Smith, 108 Fifth Ave., NYC,
212-697-9770. Shirt by Andrew Fezza Dress
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Bergdorf Goodman, NYC. Sunglasses by
Oliver Peoples, at Oliver Peoples, 8642 Sun-
set Blvd., Los Angeles, 310-657-2553.
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Pages 103-105: Breathing observation
bubble by Bellaqua Inc., 407-582-7800, Step
Jet by Step Jet Corp., 800-357-7837. Speed-
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Air Chair by RBM Inc., 909-383-0474.
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Page 161: Digital cameras: By Fujix, 800-
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puter, have become the coveted toys among techies. duce instant wallet-sized and portrait shots. Although the digital
do they work? Basically, these cameras capture shots on a photos won't have the extra-crisp resolution of those taken with
light-sensitive silicon chip rather than on film. There's no process- а traditional 35mm camera, the turnaround time can't be beat.
Digital cameras begin at $700. Generally, the more you pay, the better the picture. Our ace shooter aims to please with Fujix’ 05-515, a di
tal SLR camera with a Nikon F4 body and PCMCIA storage capabilities ($14,835). Proceeding clockwise: Apple’s Mac- and Windows-compati-
ble Quick Take 150 with an infrared close-up lens ($750), Kodak's Nikon N90-based DCS 460c—the camera we used to take this shot—with a
PCMCIA card slot and a for annotations (527,995), and Logitech's IBM-compatible Foto Man Pixtura with 144-image storage ($995).
2 Nikon
Where & How to Buy On page 159.
Skirting
Diana
Starlet DIANA
RAY has made
posters, calendars
and virtual reality
video games. You
also have seen
her on Baywatch.
Now doing a pilot
for A Whole New
Ballgame, she's
looking for a
home run.
GRAPEVINE
The Monster Mash
Colorado-based BIG HEAD TODD & THE MONSTERS
has had the heady experience of having its first al-
bum, Sister Sweetly, turn gold on the charts. The
sophomore LP, Stralegem, has been described by gui-
tarist Todd Park Mohr as koans or riddles meant to
empty the mind. Go and fill yours.
Elaine
Goes
Glamorous
When JULIA
LOUIS-DREYFUS
plays Elaine on
Seinfeld, she
sparkles from the
inside out. In this
photo, she does
some sparkling
on the outside.
Dressed to Spill
You know actress KELLY LEBROCK from
Weird Science and Woman in Red. Her new
video, Hard Bounty, is a Western. It tells the
story of a bounty hunter turned saloon
keeper, a bevy of “working girls,” a murder
and revenge. Kelly carries a .45, but not in
this dress.
A Peek
at Cheeks
Singer NONA
HENDRYX is still
pushing the enve-
lope, appearing
in this outfit at
the APLA Com-
mitment to Life
awards in Los An-
geles. Look for a
new album be-
fore the end of
the year. Until
then, Nona's bot-
tom's got ‘em.
What, Me
Worry?
Leno and Letterman
slugged it out while
Late Night host CO-
NAN O'BRIEN was
finding an audience.
He's no longer Conan
Who. O'Brien's goofy
humor gets laughs.
Temporaril
Beached 4
LISA FALCONE can be
seen ina recent Black
Crowes music video,
as а host of Playboy
TV's Erotic Land-
scapes and in her fea-
ture film debut, The
Kingdom of the Blind.
Our eyes are on Lisa.
GET THE WILLIES
Willie Mosconi was a child prodigy who eventu-
ally racked up 15 Pocket Billiard World Cham-
pionships before he retired in 1957. The
Mosconi estate has commissioned a set of five
trading cards to commemorate him. The pric
$20, sent to the Willie Mosconi Card Collection,
РО, Box 3661, Arlington, Washington 98223
More Mosconi trading cards will be issued soon.
CZAR HORIZON
Now that Russia has embraced capitalism,
czarist-chic drinking vessels are a hot export.
The bear and stag hunting-horn goblets pic-
tured below, for example, are $100 each, as is
the Fabergé-inspired helmet vodka cup. All are
from Russian Fine Arts & Collectibles, LLC,
800-335-2764. (All the vessels are gilt finished.)
And if your tastes run to hand-etched Romanov
and Nicholas 11 crystal goblets and decanters,
the company sells those, too.
POTPOURRI
GOING OUT WITH A BANG
“Serving the needs of model makers, restorers and other serious
students of antique artillery” is how South Bend Replicas, Inc.,
describes itself. And if you've ever wanted to really celebrate the
Fourth of July, this is the place to write. Prices range from about
$985 for the Continental, a 26’-long model of a Revolutionary
War cannon on wheels, to $20,000 for an authentic reproduction
of a Civil War field gun that’s powerful enough to blow the beje-
sus out of just about anything. Write South Bend Replicas at
61650 Oak Road, South Bend, Indiana 46614, for its huge $7
catalog. No, Replicas doesn't sell earplugs.
CUTE CUTOUTS
Sculpt’ Art ıs a Miami
company that special-
izes in multidimen-
sional laser-cut acrylic
sculptures in sizes from
3” x 5" to eight feet
tall. Just send a photo
ora negative to 299
SW 8th Street, 2nd
floor, Miami 33130,
and specify the size
you'd like. (An 8”
x 10” creation is
$42.95, and the com-
рапу does not have a
problem with
mate shots.) In about
aweek, you'll get
your sculpture and
the original photo
will be returned.
Call 305-860-1345
with questions. And
in addition to
three-dimensional
sculptures,
Sculpt’ Art also
creates silhouette
cutouts. Yes, the prices are cheaper.
LINKS TO THE PAST
Eugene Klompus, president of the Na-
tional Cuff Link Society, owns 30,000
pairs. And if cufflinks turn you on like
they do Klompus, then $25 for a year's
membership would be money well spent.
In addition to receiving four issues of The
Link, which provides info on cuff link
trends, collectibles and special events,
you'll get up to six free cuff link apprais-
als a year as well as discounts at jewelers.
The society’s address is RO. Box 346,
Prospect Heights, Illinois 60070.
BRITANNIA RULES THE WAVES
‘The classic English pond yacht а nau-
tical toy that refuses to sink. Prentiss
Court, РО. Box 8662, Greenville, South
Carolina 29604, sells five styles of hand-
made wooden yachts. Designed for dis-
play, not play, the boats measure about
30” long and are priced from $200 to $415.
“The $400 Concordia (pictured here) is a
traditional knockabout with a gaff rig. A
catalog costs $2. Call 803. 929.
ELVGREN AND BARE IT
Referred to as the Norman
Rockwell of cheesecake, Gil Elv-
gren is an American pinup leg-
end. Collector's Press, PO. Box
230986, Portland, Oregon
97281, has just released an over-
size softcover book titled Pin-Up
Poster Book: The Elugren Collection
that includes a biography of the
artist as well as 16 of his sexiest
illustrations. (/ Gave Him the
Brush-off is pictured here.) Price:
$25. And for $80, Collector’
Press also offers a limited-edi-
tion hardcover version signed by
the book’s author, Marianne Ohl
Phillips, an authority on pinups,
and Elvgren's son, Drake. Call
503-864-3030.
MR. TOAD, EAT YOUR HEART OUT.
Sure, today's automobiles are probably the safest and soundest
machines to ever ease down the road. But the cars of yester-
year—Hispano-Suizas, Bugattis, Cords and Duesenbergs—were
the wheels that kings drove. Now Phaidon Press has published
Dashboards, a gorgeous 240-page coflee-table book that features
the view from behind the stecring wheel of 52 exciting automo-
bilcs. Start your journcy in a Panhard 80CV and end it aboard a
BMW 2002 Turbo. Price: $39.95; to order, call 800-722-6657.
LINE OF ATTACK
Navy SEALs, Marine Force Re-
cons and others who serve in the
Special Operations branch of the
military are a special breed, and
their adventures past and pres-
ent make for great reading. Our
choice for firepower by the fire-
side? Behind the Lines, "The Jour-
nal of U.S. Military Operation,”
a bimonthly publication full of
warrior lore. A year’s subscrip-
tion is $24, sent to Behind the
Lines, RO. Box 456, Festus, Mis-
souri 63028. And if you like the
LRP/Ranger image pictured
here, it’s available on a T-shirt
for $19.95 (sizes medium to ex-
tra large). Tough-looking Ma-
гіпс Force Recon and z
UDT Tshirts are also available.
МЕХТ МОМТН
RADIO DAYS:
FANILY VALUES.
VLADIMIR NABOKOV'S “LA VENEZIANA" APPEARS FOR
THE FIRST TIME IN ENGLISH—AT A STRANGE PARTY IN AN
ANCIENT CASTLE, YOUNG SIMPSON IS TOLD THAT TO АР-
PRECIATE A FINE PAINTING HE MUST BECOME A PART OF
IT. NEWLY TRANSLATED FICTION FROM THE MASTER
THE WOMEN OF RADIO—BEHIND THOSE DULCET TONES.
ARE WOMEN WITH EVERYTHING YOU IMAGINED—AND
MORE. A PICTORIAL FROM THE DRIVE-TIME DIVAS
SCREW THE YOUNG —ТЕВА!НЕО BY THE GEEZER LOBBY
IN D.C., LEGISLATORS ARE ONCE AGAIN STICKING IT TO
AMERICA'S YOUTH. LET THE GENERATIONAL WARS BEGIN.
ARTICLE BY MARK JANNOT
THOSE BATTLING HAFTS—THE FAMILY THAT TRANS-
FORMED DISCOUNT MERCHANDISING REVOLTS AGAINST
ITSELF—FATHER VS. SON, BROTHER VS. BROTHER. КАНА.
SWISHER HANDICAPS THE WINNERS AND LOSERS
THE CHARMED LIFE OF TOMMY LEE—WHAT DOES THE
MOTLEY CRUE ROCKER HAVE THAT YOU DON'T? PAMELA
ANDERSON AND AN EMPTY ATTIC. HUMOR BY CHRISTO-
РНЕЯ NAPOLITANO AND STEPHEN RANDALL
RACHEL, RACHEL
BERRY GORDY—THE MAN WHO INVENTED MOTOWN
OPENS UP ABOUT R&B GREATS, DIANA ROSS AND WHY
STARS BOLT FOR OTHER LABELS IN A PLATINUM PLAYBOY
INTERVIEW BY DAVID SHEFF
TREKMANIA—IN A FEATURE THAT BOLDLY GOES WHERE
NONE HAS GONE BEFORE, DANIEL RADOSH EXPLORES
TREK SEX, ROMULAN DRINKING GAMES, EXTRATERRES-
TRIAL PICK-UP LINES AND STARSHIP FIX-IT TIPS
DAWN STEEL—THE FIRST WOMAN TO HEAD A MOTION
PICTURE STUDIO SOUNDS OFF ON BALLS, THE GASTING
COUGH AND THE DEFINITION OF A BITCH IN 20 QUESTIONS
BOB ZEMECKIS—WITH HIS MOVIE HITS ROMANCING THE
STONE, WHO FRAMED ROGER RABBIT AND THE BACK ТО
THE FUTURE FILMS, HE WAS THE KING OF ACTION FUN.
THEN CAME FORREST GUMP, AND NOW THE DIRECTOR'S
A STAR. PROFILE BY JOE MORGENSTERN
PLUS: WHAT'S HOT IN SUMMER SHOES, WATCHES FOR
DIVERS, CARIBBEAN DRINKS AND A UNIQUE PICTORIAL
VISIT WITH PLAYMATE RACHEL JEAN МАВТЕЕМ
Playboy (ISSN 0032-1478), July 1995, volume 42, number 7. Published monthly by Playboy in national and regional editions, Playboy,
680 North Lake Shore Drive, Chicago, Illinois 60611. Second-class postage paid at Chicago, Illinois and at additional mailing offices.
Canada Post Canadian Publications Mail Sales Product Agreement No. 56162. Subscriptions: in U.S., $29.97 for 12 issues. Postmaster:
166 Address change to Playboy, РО. Box 2007, Harlan, lowa 51537-4007, or e-mail circ@ny.playboy.com. Comments to: edit@playboy.com
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SURGEON GENERAL'S WARNING: Cigarette
Smoke Contains Carbon Monoxide.
You Cari Rush
Smooih Flavor.