tv View Change LINKTV August 15, 2017 4:30am-5:01am PDT
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- are you ready, kids? all: aye, aye, captain! - i can't hear you. all: aye, aye, captain! - ♪ ohh... ♪ who lives in a pineapple under the sea? ♪ all: spongebob squarepants! - ♪ absorbent and yellow and porous is he ♪ all: spongebob squarepants! - ♪ if nautical nonsense be something you wish ♪ all: spongebob squarepants! - ♪ then drop on the deck and flop like a fish ♪ all: spongebob squarepants! - ready? all: spongebob squarepants! spongebob squarepants! spongebob squarepants! - spongebob squarepants! [laughing] ♪ [waves crashing] [dramatic orchestral music]
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♪ - [yawns] i'm bored. - hmm, interesting. me too! let's go look for something to do in old man squidward's shed. - old man squidward's shed? - yyyuuup. - [whistles] - ooooh. [both gasp] what's that? - what is it? - i don't know, patrick. - [sighs] ♪ la-da-dee, la-da-dum, la-da-doo ♪ ♪ la-da-dee, la-da-dum, la-da ♪ - [trilling lips] - [laughing] - [gasps] it's old man squidward. - hide! - ♪ la-da-dee, la-da-dum, la-da-doo ♪ ♪ doo-doo-doo doo-doo-doo-da-da-doo ♪
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hmm. where's my trowel? - [whispering] spongebob? - [whispering] yes, patrick? - [whispering] is this a trowel? - [whispering] yes, patrick. - oh, here it is. [screaming] - don't hurt us, squidward. - we're bored. - we just want to play with your... whatever this thing is. - no, no, no, no, no, no. you morons would probably-- you want to play with my lawn mower? both: yeah! yeah! yeah! yeah! yeah! - thanks for letting us mow your lawn, squidward. ahhh! my patty-flipping hand! [both crying] - [giggles maniacally] [engine humming] knock yourselves out. crash! [giggling and shouting] [screams] - whoa! [giggling] - vroom-vroom-vroom-vroom.
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[laughter] [tires squealing] - [humming] excuse me, davy. i've got my first blind date in 400 years, and i've got to look good. hmm, it's a little torn. course, it was the shirt i was buried in. ah, memories. [sniffs] [glass shattering] [hacking] [panting] okay, that one's a bit ripe. hmm. stained. naw. too itchy. hey, there she is. i've been savin' this beauty for a special occasion. [hissing] lookin' good. [rumbling and laughter] [tires squealing and laughter]
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[rumbling and laughter] [dirt splatting] [flames whooshing] - who dares-- [buzzing] who-- [buzzing] disturb-- [buzzing] the flyin'-- [buzzing] dutchman? my beard! hey! thwack! [growls] [zapping] who dares disturb the flyin' dutchman? - you're not the flying dutchman. - yeah, the flying dutchman has a beard. - i don't look like the flying dutchman because you morons cut off my beard!
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both: ohhhhhhh. squiiiidwarrrrrd. - it's spongeboooob. - and patriiiick. we're ghooooosts. both: oooooooh. - we're going to haunt you foreveeeeer. both: ohhhhhhh. [blubbering] - eh, well, that killed the mood. both: oooooooh. - i knew i shouldn't have lent them my lawn mower. - good night, patrick. [sighs] being a ghost can sure tire you out. - good night, ghost buddy.
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- that's odd. however shall i get in? blahrb! oh. hmm, well, that's handy. [yawns] i am beat. well, i don't need to take the stairs. [whooshing] [sighs] [snoring] hey, patrick, i didn't sleep so good last night. - i didn't sleep at all. i could see through my eyelids. my eyelids! - [gasps] i'm late for work. - my eyelids. - [panting] don't worry, mr. krabs. i'm here. - aaaah! mermaid! - spongebob, you're late.
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why are you bright green? what happened to your legs? - he's a ghost, mr. krabs. - a ghost, eh? can you still cook krabby patties? - can do, mr. krabs. - then get your captain's quarters in the kitchen. - aye, aye, oh, living employer. - ew. - ♪ la la la la la [humming] [splatting] [whistling] clink! ♪ la la la la la la splat! [sizzling] [grunts] [grunts] [groaning] [sobbing] i can't cook krabby patties. i don't want to be a ghost anymore, patrick.
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- i don't either. i can't eat anything. food just goes right through me. - ugh. - maybe the weird hairless man will change us back. - yeah, let's go see the flying dutchman. - ah, at least i still have my personality. both: change us back. change us back. - we don't like being ghosts. i hate being a ghost. please, mr. dutchman, we can't take it. constantly moaning and groaning. - invisible to the world. - living without a soul. - it's miserable. - how could anyone live like this? - [slurping] - hmm, i guess you feel my pain. i'll lift the curse from you. [thunder booming] snap! - hey, we're still ghosts.
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- yeah, yeah, yeah. the curse will wear off when my beard grows back. [both gasp] - but we want to be normal now. - well, i want to be on my date now. but you knuckleheads loused that up too. [tinkling] - we're still ghosts because you can't go on your date? - and you can't go on your date because you're ugly? both: makeover. boing! sproing! [squishing] [buzzing] [squashing] - [panting] [buzzing] - thanks, fellas. i love the new beard. [giggles]
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race car driver: "wipe out!" rc bumper cars comes with two race cars for double the fun! race car driver: "i'm dizzy! it's a race to cross, or crash the finish line. boy 1 "oh no!" race car driver: "i 'm the winner!" little tikes rc bumper cars comes with two cars and two remotes for double the action. batteries not included.
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- specials? we don't have specials. [heavy grating] [thumping] [baby screaming] [grating] - good morning, sir. welcome to the krusty krab. - [breathy hissing] i think i'll have a krabby patty. thwap! - [groans] ooh. one krabby patty comin' up. - mr. squidward, you're in a chipper mood this mornin'. did you get an order of fancy decorative soaps in the mail or somethin'? - even better. i have a clarinet recital immediately after work today, so ain't nothing gonna ruin my day. [baby cooing] - ooh, ooh, terribly sorry, sir. - no need. see? not a drop. [splatting] [growls] i can't take this anymore! - i told you. there's no early bird special. now, stop callin' me here, mother.
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- this is unacceptable. - what? - this. - nice to have you back, squidward. - this is an outrage. i will no longer tolerate my personal items being soiled by the rabble that crawls into this restaurant. i demand a place to put my stuff. - hmm. okay. i suppose you could put it with the nacho cheese. no one's gone near that in years. - you ever read this, krabs? - bikini bottom labor regulations? ew, gross! get that thing away from me. it's givin' me hives. - it specifically states that all employers must provide his or her employees with a secure, clean place to store personal property. - ah, blast you, squidward. you drive a hard bargain. i guess i could rustle something up for you. - yeah, sizzle those juices. [makes sizzling sound] - [muttering] oh, here we go. found it. - wow. what is it?
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- it's me old navy locker. good as new. - who's that, mr. krabs? - that appears to be corporal sterling, lad. i forgot all about that prank. squidward, your locker's ready. - ooh, do we get to share this locker like we share hairnets? - not in a whale's age. - now, not so fast, mr. squidward. the law requires that all employees have a secure place for personal items. so you are required by law to share. - oh, i suppose i can share, but only since it's required by law. hey, this thing is filthy. you don't expect me to clean it. - no, he doesn't. and i don't either. [coughing] [sucking sound] [water rushing] [sparkling sound] - blimey. she hasn't sparkled like this since boot camp.
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carry on, boys. - impressive indeed. just keep your grubby little hands to your side. - you got it, squidward. finally i have a clean place to store my toothbrush. - just don't touch my clarinet. - i promise nothing untoward will happen. - order up, spongebob. spongebob, what do you think you're doing? you're supposed to be fry cooking. i told you not to touch my stuff. - i didn't. i wore protective gloves. and besides, don't you like how classy it looks now? - velvet? - now, i'd like to stand by and idly chat with you, squidward, but i must attend to my krusty krab duties. in the future, please keep your interruptions to a minimum, sir, please. - and here is your change, ma'am. what is that idiot doing now? [clattering] - loose change. [shouting] - aaaaarrrr! [apelike hooting] [roaring] - i hope you're not trying to shove those boxes
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into that locker. - too late. it's already done. - if you smashed my clarinet, so help me, neptune, i will-- - don't worry, squidward. there's plenty of room. i expanded a bit. - well, it's all fine and dandy, but where's my clarinet? - well, that's simple. we just simply consult the card catalog and find squidward's clarinet, drawer 36.8-b. see? - fine, but remember, it is vitally important that nothing happens to it. - no worries, buddy. you're in good hands. - eat up. [drill whirring, hammer pounding] what's he doing? [drilling and cranking] - may i order, please? - all right, what do you want? - i'll have-- [drill whirring] everything okay back there? - yeah, just a bit of, um, renovation. [sawing and banging] [saw buzzing] my clarinet. spongebob. sponge-- spongebob? there, 36.8-b. a note? - "item has been temporarily moved during reconstruction.
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relocated to shelf 1,018.2-e." - spongebob. 1,018.2-e. another note? - "oops. did i say 1,018.2-e? "i meant 2,019.3-m. sorry." - spongebob? spongebob? - [laughing] - spongebob, wait. what have you done with my-- - [giggling] - spongebob, i do not play games. [gasps] where am i? what is this place? [clicking] my clarinet. what the-- - [laughing] - hey, come back. i need my clarinet. come back. where are you?
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spongebob--oof. - i am the keeper of the horned forest. state your business here. - i--i'm trying to find my clarinet. - your clarinet? - yes, my clarinet, of which i am the proud owner. - [laughs] a clarinet is not owned. why don't you tell me why you're really here? - you callin' me a liar? - i don't appreciate your tone. - i'm sorry. i didn't mean to offend you. - this is a sacred place where clarinets can live without persecution. you need to learn respect. - [groaning] i've learned. i've learned respect. - i don't believe you. - aaahhh! [splashing] [gasps] [coughs] - [laughing]
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- stand still, you idiot. - [laughing] - i got you now. [grunting] aha. what the-- spongebob? spongebob? - [laughing] - [snickering] [sniffs] ha-ha-ha. gah. - aaahh! [clarinets playing] [blasting sound] [grunting] ding! - i win! i win! hey, what are you doing here? - you tell me, what in the wide world of sports is this place? and how did you get so big? - hmm, must be all the pressure. - what are you talking about? - it must be... the pressure.
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i got to get out of here! - where are you going, you imbecile? - [laughing] [sucking sound] [explosion] [laughing] [laughing] - almost got you. oof. oof. [splattering] - [laughing] i just sweet-talked an old lady out of 20 bucks for a krabby patty. [laughs] - [moaning] - squidward, are you okay? - [babbling incoherently] such a nightmare. - squidward, what are you trying to say, buddy? - [coughs] i tried to get my clarinet in there. it's impossible. - clarin--oh, you mean this. - [gasps] where did you get that?
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- well, with all the ruckus you were making over it, i kept it with me just to make sure it was safe. - [growls] - call it a friendly gesture. - i'll show you a friendly gesture. do you know the horror i've endured? let's see how you like it! crash! [tires squealing] ah. - are you ready, mr. squidward? - yes, yes, i am. as a matter of fact, you wouldn't believe what i had to go through to get-- gaahhh! - hi, squidward. you wouldn't believe what i had to go through to get here. - ahhhhhhhhhhh! - huh, i was just going to bring him his clarinet.
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- are you ready, kids? all: aye, aye, captain! - i can't hear you. all: aye, aye, captain! - ♪ ohh... ♪ who lives in a pineapple under the sea? ♪ all: spongebob squarepants! - ♪ absorbent and yellow and porous is he ♪ all: spongebob squarepants! - ♪ if nautical nonsense be something you wish ♪ all: spongebob squarepants! - ♪ then drop on the deck and flop like a fish ♪ all: spongebob squarepants! - ready? all: spongebob squarepants! spongebob squarepants! spongebob squarepants! - spongebob squarepants! [laughing] ♪ [waves crashing] [jaunty ukulele music] ♪
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