you got to [ bleep ] [ bleep ] on the ground?> i shouldn't be here. >> we were besties, what the [ bleep ]? [ laughter ] >> jimmy: those are the worst besties i think i've ever seen. you know, i i this they were more brosephs than besties. any "twilight" fans? guillermo, you? >> yes, jimmy. >> jimmy: okay. the next movie isoming out, november 18th. it's called "breaking dawn part one." those of you who follow the series know that bella is pregnant in this movie and she's not sure if the baby belongs to edward or jacob. she has no idea -- it's not a joke. she had no idea what kind of creature is lurking within her womb. they just released the trailer online and it looks pretty good. >> whoa. >> it's crushing you from the inside out. >> if you kill her, you kill me. bella? >> come on, push! >> oh, it's a spongebob! >> momma! dadda! >> i'm the daddy. give me that. >> holy [ bleep ]. >> hell yeah. he looks just like me! i'm the daddy! >> jimmy: only bella could do that. the occupy wall street protests continued in new york city today

this past eight months has been [ bleep ] up man, been [ bleep ] up. quit going to work. the meetings. next thing you know i'm drinking. the next thing you know i'm smoking, i'm slamming it out of the blue. and i don't do that. that's not me. that's not who i am right now. >> what effect does it have on you when you inject speed into your body? i mean it's got to be a really intense high. >> yeah, it's bad. you know, i'm not that person. i am not that [ bleep ] person. i am not that person. you know, the person i am, i got three children that are almost grown, you know. i mean i really took care of my family, you know what i mean? and this past eight or nine months of my life has been -- i'm glad to be in jail, but i'm not glad because i did some things that i'm paying for right now. i'm sure i deserve it. i can't say that -- i can't expect to not be punished for it. but at the same time, you know, i need help. >> i need to go back over the first part of our conversation, because there's evidence that you did get involved in selling some stolen cars in an undercover sting

you [ bleep ]. [ bleep ] you. >> i didn't -- >> [ bleep ] you, mike. >> i didn't -- >> mike, i'm notding. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: got some arm. they should get her to pitch in the little league world series next year. you know, most people think "jersey shore" is a bunch of orange people binge drinking and exposing their genitals and for the most part, it is. but if you really watch the show and you really listen to what they're saying you will find something thought provoking in every episode. you just have to piece it together yourself. well, like this. >> every generation, there the course of history literally from jurassic time to today does a necessary evil so their people can feel sophisticated and classy. ew -- nicole. >> what? >> did you fart? yeah. >> jimmy: classy and gassy. we'll get "science bob" to explain that. this is kind of interesting. the fox network is once again at odds with the actors who do the voices on "the simpsons." fox says if the actors don't take significant pay cuts, they won't be able to continue to make new episodes of the show. right now, each of the

]. [ bleep ]. >> hold it. >> come on, you [ bleep ]. [ bleep ]. i can to this 24/7. >> hymes is back, right now, on a parole violation. he's been violated on parole numerous times. with him, i think it's entertainment. it's a game. he is a master at pushing people's buttons. he knows what reactions he wants to get and he's very, very good at doing it. >> with scanvinski hymes reaching the end of his sentence in just a few days, he will have to find ways to entertain himself in the outside world. >> for most inmates, release from prison is just a temporary freedom. two years after getting out, more than 50% of california's prisoners find themselves right back behind bars. every day officer whitehall greets new prisoners whose crimes range from simple parole violations to major felonies. >> what's your name? >> mcdaniels. >> all right. you been here before? >> no. >> go over stand by the fence. >> what's your name? >> jacob. >> how much time you got to do? >> six. >> six years? >> yeah. >> go over, stand by the fence. you can bring the rest of the g

and look at this [ bleep ].utiful right now. >> i'm ready to stand up and [ bleep ] them all. >> what's going on with the defense team, they're trying to [ bleep ] up dr. murray's reputation. >> little [ bleep ]? >> calling yourself black walnut ice cream is actually your ploy to get white people to [ bleep ] you. >> don't forget to e-mail us. send me pictures of your [ bleep ]. >> you heard one daughter say to the other one, you shut the [ bleep ] up. and the other said, no, you shut the [ bleep ] up. they were 3 at the time. >> this is [ bleep ] my what with john schneider. >> i would have to say his body looks a lot like mine. no question about that. >> is that right? is that right? is that right? >> i could have had candy, apples and gum. but no, i had to listen to you, you [ bleep ] head. what a fool i was! [ applause ] >> jimmy: we've got a wonderful program for you tonight. rebecca romijn is here. we have music from the fray. and we'll be right back with just justin timberlake, so stick around. tonight we

every single time we try people [ bleep ] us over. >> chocolate. >> [ bleep ] up.. we sit there and bust our ass. we sit there and we work our [ bleep ] job. overtime. what do we get? >> what do we get? we get [ bleep ]. then people want us to ask why are you still on the streets, chocolate? because you [ bleep ] me over. >> reporter: she even unleashes some of her furry on terry, the friend who has given them a place to live. >> terry going to want to [ bleep ] us over, brian. i see that. he's already showing [ bleep ] side. $10 for a pack of cigarettes. >> reporter: there is more than her living situation on the mind. the alcohol reveals something even more painful from her past. >> i have a 3-year-old daughter. she is a very good girl. i had her when i was on the streets. and i was -- i had nothing. then i went and found out i was pregnant. and i had her and my fiance, he came and took her from me. i took really good care of my daughter. >> you are doing good. you are doing good. >> i know i can. i know i can. i know i can take care of her, baby. i gave birth to

you talking [ bleep ]? what are you [ bleep ], [ bleep ] say, who said chomo? >> chomo is prison slang for child molester. but it can also be used to define anyone who has a sexual offense. >> we caught up with pasco later that day. he was at the cell block microwave preparing his evening meal. >> call that spaghetti. i call that wet noodles. >> at first, pasco was reluctant to talk about the earlier confrontation in the hallway. >> talk out there later. oh, [ bleep ], i'll talk now. i've been down 20 years. i'm a murderer. i'm a convict. nobody disrespects me like that. i got some little punk coming in. he's been in for a little time and [ bleep ] runs his little mouth, [ bleep ]. fine. that gets you killed in here. i'm a murderer. straight-up convict. >> the more cephis tried to convince us he was a convict, the more i wondered if there was something else going on. >> a few days later, pasco told us what did go on the night he committed murder. >> i was at a bar drinking one night. had nine shots of whiskey and several beers. and gave a ride to my sister-in-l

but i don't give a [ bleep ]. [ bleep ] them.y think they're going to break me. [ bleep ]. >> a short time later the disciplinary committee reaches a decision. there will be no sanctions for erik franzens, but burak ersen will receive two additional days in isolation for being argumentative in the hearing and another month in section 20 for the fight. we caught up with burak three days later, after he was moved out of isolation and back into his section 20 cell. he was in a much better mood. >> here. that's chocolate. you know, you want? this is good. america, you don't have everything. eat. next on "lockup world tour" -- >> what do you do with pliers? >> all different ts. >> one of th most infamous murderers in scotland. and an old-timer stirs up trouble. >> i tried to explain to you, lock me up if you want. you lock me up, i'll burn my peter. >> burn your peter? >> aye. the people. because: bad weather, the price of oil those are every airline's reality. and solutions will not come from 500 tons of metal and a paintjob. they'll

>> [ bleep ]. [ bleep ]. >> look at his hair. [ bleep ]. look at that. >> i don't know any of them.ow them. >> i don't want to know. is that a girl? >> if you have a broken leg, you will get aspirin. if you have the flu, you will get aspirin. turn back and face forward. >> the students aren't on the yard very long when they learn how unpredictable life here can be. >> down! >> get down. >> alarms signaling a major disturbance are common at corcoran. inmates who don't hit the ground risk get taken down by staff. >> see that? >> you had everybody hitting the ground. you had the correctional officers telling them what to do. everyone's yelling and screaming and it was intense. >> when the yard officer tells you to get up, then you can get up. until then you don't move. >> get up. >> get up. >> back in the order you were at. >> there were a couple kids that were shaking. it wasn't the field trip they thought it was going to be. >> i'll get you something. >> feeling a little sick. >> the next stop does nothing to calm nerves. the prison gymnasium has been converted into a dorm because of

like a [bleeped].orida. [cheering and applause] yes, we're quite sophisticated. after all the trouble you've caused us, florida, previous election, you have the balls to demand to vote earlier. you're lucky we even let you vote at all. you want to know why we let iowa and new hampshire vote first? because they've earned our trust. when we let them use our votes, they don't wring it back with swamp water in the engine and alligator meat in the grill and hanging chads all over the windshield and pat buchanan's name spray painted on the apull industry. why are you even doing this? >> we have all of these early primary dates that are really in small states and states that are not diverse in population, and it's time for a big state, populated state and a minority represented state to be represented. >> jon: oh, snap. did you see that, new hampshire. oh, [bleeped], you're so homogenized you make milk jealous. oh, boo. oh, you're so white you call snow camouflage. boo. oh, [bleeped], you're so white you got

i'm trying real [ bleep ] hard to stay out of trouble and it get my [ bleep ] together, and feels likee nothing to come home to. like you gave it to the other girl. i don't feel like i have a family. >> stay calm. >> there's too much going on. >> taylor had a young son when she arrived at prison. she gave birth to a second son in prison. >> that little baby don't even know me. this is what you get when you do things that you're not supposed to do. you lose your family. you lose your children. you lose everything. and then you're stuck in here and then you're stuck to run to other things to try to fill your happiness and nothing works and none of this stuff means no woman, no guard, no nothing. what means something to me just hung up on me. and that's my consequence. but there's nothing that i can say, because i'm here and i'm helpless. >> but for some of these women, prison has become the place to find love. >> i have a hard time making friends but the friends i do have are real bitches, so. >> at 28 years old, jamey eldridge has already wracked up 21 convictions for crimes including a

>> [ bleep ] [ bleep ]. >>> four to go on the "rtm" countdown.r four is all about a guy who is becoming an international internet star. the proof is in the pudding. >> my favorite internet star is deejay flula borg, the german who has the difficulty understanding the english language. particularly idioms. >> don't look a gift horse in the mouth. >> what happens when you shoot [ bleep ] the proof is in the pudding? what is this, a cooking show? >> i really didn't want to know who he was. because it just was funny do me to see flula struggle through some of these phrases. but today we're going to change that. we're going to meet flula borg, he's with us today, "right this minute." flula! [ cheers and applause ] tell me who you are. >> you probably know i'm from germany. deutschland. and i'm a techno deejay. >> have you thought of going the comedy route? >> no, i don't know how to make funny things. i think when people say, let us make a funny joke, guess what, it's not funny. >> are there any german idioms that we might find funny? >> i think when

i won't let anybody [ bleep ] on me. that's prison. you can't let anybody [ bleep ] you.here are a lot of men in this hall afraid. afraid. i'm not [ bleep ] one of them. i'm 60. they don't attempt to bully me. they know what will happen. >> what's that? >> i'll [ bleep ] stab them. >> but reid had a larger goal than leaving protective custody. >> jimmy! passionately speaking, i don't think he wants to be here. i think he wants to move to another prison. there's another prison closer to where his family is. it's not as easy as lifting the floor and moving him. we'd have to meet certain criteria which he doesn't meet at the moment. once he's addressed his needs, then we'll look at that again. >> i come from greenock. that's a long-term prison. in greenock. and i would like to go there because i come from there. and with 14 months left of my sentence, i would like to finish it in my hometown. so i've suggested that. they said they'll look to see if i fit the criteria. which i do, i think. because i'm not a troublemaker.n threatening or assauing words of behavior. okay. when

stand up. >> i've been through this [ bleep ] before. this [ bleep ] don't hurt. i don't give a [ bleep ]. i'm going to be naked. i'll jump off my [ bleep ] sink. >> sometimes we need guidance in our life, and we need the parents to be there for us when we need them the most. and when you ain't got them, it just hurts. >> 16-year-old kevin has been at lake county juvenile for three months. it's been a long detainment. and not his first. >> this is my sixth charge. i had two truancies, criminal trespassing, runaway, burglary, and this charge was only battery. me and my mom's arguing. her boyfriend was kind of drinking. he started laughing at me, like he thought something was funny. so i reached over my mom and i swung at him. the cops came, and my mom took his side. she's like, please press charges, you know. i just want him to learn his lesson. i pleaded guilty to my charge. and the judge, he had to think about it. he didn't really know what to do. so i'm still here. >> it takes time for the juvenile courts to figure out how to best handle each individual case. an

it's called a tu, (bleep). [ laughter ]cond of all.sex with the duck is consensual, then i would say yes, he is pat robertson, the guy who said all ogs we showed you is telli tone itld be like facebook saying to you, tmi. [ laughter ] that's i lingo for too much information. [ laughter ] anyway. the question becomes why? why is pat robertson,sk!zaka, that crazy (bleep) guy,ublican presidential candidates to mode their rhetoric. >> i believe it was lyndon johnson that said don't these if they extreme position i'll lose the election. they'll make i can't win. they have to stop this. it's counter productive. >> jon: not that the things you are saying are wrong or policy or callus or crazy but that you're right, but let's keep it our little secret. [ laughter ] is telling the g.o.p. field is this: if you tell people what we honestly believe, an electoral mority of of those people will freak the (bleep) out. he is saying the firstf right clu talk about club. by the way -- [cheers and applause] -- i want to clear -- [cheers and applause] the

so i'd go easy on that "brother" [bleeped]. but to perry's point that cain's 9% federal sales tax would impose an additional cost on top of state sales tax, well, cain had a simple response. >> this is an example of mixing apples and oranges. the state tax is an apple. we are replacing the current tax code with oranges. >> herman, are you saying that state sales tax will also go away. >> no, that's an apple. >> oh, okay. we're replacing a bunch of oranges. >> will the people in nevada not have to pay nevada sales tax and in addition pay the 9% tax. >> you're still going to pay that. that's apples and oranges. >> and i'm going to get a bushell basket with apples and oranges. and people in nevada don't want to pay both taxes. >> jon: hey, herman cain, you like apples? dawes you just got wicked schooled by the former governor of massachusetts. how do you like them [bleeped] apples. ahhhh! thank you. that was my one-man show idea good will hunting" the apple scene. but of course romney is the front-runner. here he is defending romn

a [bleep] my pants!ow-- (applause) (laughter) >> jon: on a superficial level, romney's superficialiality would appear to be a detriment in ever moving beyond his 23% but i believe his superficialiality is the key to his strategy. he is clearly surveyed the republican field and decided i think 23%'s enough to beat any of these yahoo!s. (laughter) see right now herman cain shot up from 8% to the mid 30s. he's beating romney. is he a long-term threat to mitt romney? >> we don't have a -- >> it's gok lech cuted. >> electrified. >> could going to be a sign on the other side that says it will kill you. >> african-americans have been brainwashed. >> so you are saying any community if they want to ban a mosque. >> yes, they have the right to do that. >> if you don't have a job and you are not rich, blame yourself. >> and would ask me who is the president of ubeki beki beki beki stanozolol i am going to say, you know, i don't know. >> jon: and you know what, if they want me to visit croatia i'm going to be like h

[bleep] pants! (laughter) >> jon: on a superficial level romney's superficialiality would appear to be a detriment in ever moving beyond his 23% but i b superficialiality is the key to strategy. he is clearly surveyed the republican field and decided i think 23%'s enough any of these yahoo!s. (laughter) see right now herman cain shot up from 8% to the mid 30s. long-term threat to mitt romney? >> we don't have a -- >> it's cuted. >> electrified. >> cou sign on t kill you.nwashed. >> community if they want to ban a mos >> yes they have the right >> if you don't and you are not rich blame yourself. k >> and ubeki bekiol i going to sa you know i don't know.ou know what visit croatia i'm going to be like hey what kind of [bleep] name is that. speak english over here. (laughter) that's why romney doesn't have to really say anything. his strategy in the debate cede my time which brings to us ricks always seems to be posing for a box for just for men hairdown in the (applause) he's down in the because of so

what up, [bleeped]? but first we're coming up on the second anniversary of a that rocked scientific community. it's not of albert einstein's lingerie collection. [laughter] e equals m i'm talking about climate-gate, the 2009 controversy surrounding irregularities in research data. >> some stolen are giving to global warming scept >> hackers seized a file of more than 1,000hose e-mail some climate scientists seem to be suggesting that perhaps they're massaging the data. >> jon: ah, and then releasing it. yes. [laughter] suggested that sere guilty of massage with releas [laughter] erections. >> climate-gate has revealed thby hacks and frauds. >> the global warming hoax and debunked. >> one of the l with the e-mails is this is an unsettled science. >> perhaps ite fraud. >> jon: poor al gore, global warming completelyed via the very internet you invented. [laughter] me from, really, that's only twoo? i'm aging in dog years. well, since climate-gate, it's of in global warmin % in 2006 to only 59% now. it's ch

tonight the osbournes uncensored -- >> [ bleep ] you all! >> -- well, nearly uncensored. this is "piers morgan tonight." >> yeah! >> ozzy, sharon, jack, here we are on the outskirts of hollywood in one of your many fab lis homes. do you ever sit here just the three of you sometimes and think, how did we get here? >> every day. i got -- how i got here, i come from the airport, got in a cab. >> be serious a moment. i watched jack's movie about you, ozzy. and what it reminded me is from the very humble beginnings that you all came from -- you didn't come from any privilege or any great wealth or anything. particularly you, ozzy. i just wonder whether sometimes you have that moment where you just think how did this happen? >> you know, i had the occasion to go back to the house i grew up in in ashton birmingham a few months ago. it's when you go back that the reality of what you've done hits you right between the eyes, i mean. >> it's a tiny house. >> tiny, tiny. you could get this whole thing into this area. there were six of us, and my mom and dad. i don't know how we did i

i'm ozzie osborne, not oprah [ bleep ] winfrey.yugs book in which you offer outrageous advice to people. i have sort of come around to your way of thinking. whatever their problem, is you've had it, only worse. >> i survived. >> exactly. and you're still here. you're fit as a fiddle. and you are a perfect guy to advise people on all their problems. >> this book basically is common sense. people write to me and they go, i got these terrible hemorrhoids. i go, why are you writing to me for? if you can write to me, then you have the horrendous hemorrhoids, i'm sure your doctors are going to go, my god. >> did you ever imagine that your father would become a medical advisory board? >> you know, it wouldn't surprise me. he knows about what every single pharmaceutical is under the sun. you can call him up and tell him and he's like, yeah, the doctor gave me this. oh, you have to take a pill many the morning. make sure you eat after you take it, not before. he knows anything about everything medical. >> he's like as soon as you come in wi

>> calm down. >> i'm not about [ bleep ] being sprayed. and i don't give a [ bleep ].u nothing but respect, man. tell me, all you got to do is -- don't get no respect. don't i? don't i? >> someone got upset from something we may have taken from him. we'll talk to him when he calms down and handle it that way. we handled it pretty well. we ended up getting him out of here. hopefully runs smooth tonight. >> coming up next on "lockup: extended stay." the isu search pays off. >> that into your neck wouldn't be a good scenario. >> but will it be enough to stop more violence? >> something could go wrong. and all it takes is something to let it off and it becomes a forest fire. it may be a sign that your digestive system could be working better. listen to this with occasional irregularity, things your body doesn't use could be lingering in your system, causing discomfort. but activia has been shown in clinical studies to help with slow intestinal transit when consumed 3 times per day. 7 out of 10 doctors recommend activia. and the great taste is recommended by me! why did we

you [ bleep ].et. >> jesus [ bleep ]. >> there's some more right there. >> i've never heard of a fine like that in my life you [ bleep ]. you [ bleep ]. >> but the rule of the road, which is captured every day on videotape is, expect the unexpected. whether it's being clipped by another motorist on the side of the road or saving the life of a child after a horrific tornado. >> -- issued a tornado warning. >> in may 1999 one of the most powerful tornadoes on record looms on the oklahoma landscape. >> this is an extremely dangerous and life-threatening situation. >> the killer storm bears down on tiny bridge creek, 40 miles outside of oklahoma city. >> get into a storm shelter if you have one. get into an enclosed closet. >> in their house, dead center in the storm's past is amy krago, her 10-month-old daughter aaliyah and the rest of her family, crammed into a closet and expecting the worst. >> we heard the tornado coming. it just started ripping the house apart. i thought i was going to die. it hurt

what up, [bleeped]? but first we're coming up on the second anniversary of a scandal that rocked the scientific community. no, it's not the discovery of albert einstein's lingerie collection. [laughter] e equals mc... i'm talking about climate-gate, the 2009 controversy surrounding possible irregularities in climate research data. >> some stolen e-mails are giving encouragement to global warming sceptics. >> hackers seized a file of more than 1,000 e-mails. >> in those e-mail, some climate scientists seem to be suggesting that perhaps they're massaging the data. >> jon: ah, and then releasing it. yes. [laughter] hacked e-mails suggested that some global warming scientists were guilty of massage with release. [laughter] ironically giving their critics erections. >> climate-gate has revealed that global warming and that movement is run by hacks and frauds. >> the global warming hoax continues to be exposed and debunked. >> one of the things we have learned through climate-gate with the e-mails is this is a

i've been reading up on this [bleeped] all day. all right. [applause] if only an impartial arbiter could come in, remove the warming debit's political implications and just examine the science. and if only that person could be funded in large part by two titans of a constituency of the global warming debate, industry. yes, richard muller, the berkeley physic's professor took on thelimate datas his biggest private funders, the koch brothers. no not those two. different coke brothers. those guys i don't even think are brothers. that's the guys.nd david koch. so you see where research sure enough last week sceptical doc muller announced his res the "wall street whoa, global warmin did not see that coming. yes, the study funded by the koch brothers confirms was actually coarth is getting or judging bting more embarrassed. [laughter] story. i bet debunking be hoosier.oosier. >> foodies of the world rejoice the mcrib is back.ally pig out>> the boneless barbecue sandwich will be on the a mcrib excited are you about the mcrib? >> i can't believe ther