and now, sean hayes! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> sean: whoo!heers and applause ] thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you. that's so nice. thank you, guys. welcome to "jimmy kimmel live." i am your guest host, sean hayes. [ cheers and applause ]

night, and i want to address something she said about me. >> tomorrow night, a man i once kissed, sean hayesthat's true, will be hosting with his guests awkwafina and keke palmer -- >> sean: yeah, we actually made out a few times. [ laughter ] totally true. and one time i went for it. put my hand down her pants and was like "wait, you don't have a penis?" and that was it, i was out. i was out. [ laughter ] how many of you are visiting from out of town? [ cheers and applause ] that's great. quick question. any of you get duct-taped to your seat on the way in? [ laughter ] no? just trying to get a quick count on the karens here. [ laughter ] as you may have seen, there have been several in-flight incidents lately where the crew had to duct-tape unruly passengers to their seats. earlier this month, a man allegedly groped two female flight attendants and punched a male flight attendant on the way to florida. because of course they were going to florida. [ laughter ] that's not the kind of mayhem you see on a flight to vermont. you know? [ laughter ] so this is happening a lot, that some airlines

all of that is first, but first what is coming up tonight on jimmy kimmel live with guest host sean hayes. sean: i'm sean hayes, but you can call me spanky. >> i'm getting a storm. -- star. doesn't it make you feel like -- ♪ oh! my new, bigger, crispier cluck sandwich. mmh. just tell me you're not going to go overboard with the marketing. no. you're fully clucked out, aren't you? try my $6.99 cluck sandwich combo. download the jack app today. shoot. what's wrong? i think i'm down to my last inhaler. don't worry. you can refill it and get it delivered using the kaiser permanente app. smart. refill most prescriptions online and get delivery for no cost. and there you have it- woah. refill most prescriptions wireless on the most reliable network nationwide. wow. -big deal! ...we get unlimited for just 30 bucks. sweet, i get that too and mine has 5g included. that's cool, but ours save us serious clam-aroonies. relax people, my wireless is crushing it. that's because you all have xfinity mobile with your internet. it's wireless so good, it keeps one upping itself. my new, better-than-ever clu

i'm sean hayes.ee, her album is called "stand for myself." music from yola. [ cheers and applause ] and "jimmy kimmel live" has some great hosts lined up for next week. on monday, stephen a. smith will host with his guest snoop dogg. one direction's niall horan will take over on tuesday. he's doing something special with the jonas brothers. and on wednesday and thursday, the great rupaul will host. then he'll sashay away. [ cheers and applause ] our first guest is a golden globe-winning actress and entrepreneur from a very famous family. ever heard of the ross dress for less discount store? [ laughter ] she's currently nominated for an emmy award for her very funny show, "black-ish." please welcome tracee ellis ross. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> hello! wait, that joke was so funny. yes, i'm of ross dress for less. >> sean: except for tonight. >> dress for more. >> sean: yes. wait a minute, why -- i'll bite. why the no shoes? >> well, dr. samson said no shoes. >> sean: dr. samson? >> i have a torn men

all of that is first, but first what is coming up tonight on jimmy kimmel live with guest host sean hayessean: i'm sean hayes, but you can call me spanky. >> i'm getting a storm. -- star. doesn't it make you feel like -- ♪ is your family ready for an emergency? you can prepare by mapping out two ways to escape your home, creating a supply kit, and including your whole family in practice drills. for help creating an emergency plan, visit safetyactioncenter.pge.com a little preparation will make you and your family fen emerge. a week's worth of food and water, radio, flashlight, batteries and first aid kit are a good start to learn more, visit safetyactioncenter.pge.com dan: the last resistance holdout in afghanistan has fallen to the taliban. telemann fighters raising their flag over local government buildings. it has been a violent weekend in the country. a pregnant policewoman was reported killed by taliban forces in a women's rights demonstration was violently suppressed and couple. telemann officials met with united nations undersecretary general, the u.n. province to maintain assistan

. >> i am sean hayes. there's an action figure which is fun. [applause] >> do you just go to a renaissance fair? man, look at that internet that doesn't miss a beat. that's cute, but my internet streams to my ride. ok chill, cause mine's so fast no one can catch me. sweet, but my internet gives me unlimited wireless with 5g. that's because you all have xfinity. whoa! internet and wireless so good, it keeps one-upping itself. get started with xfinity internet for $19.99 a month for 12 months with a 1 year agreement. plus, save up to $400 a year on wireless over at&t when you add xfinity mobile. switch today. ama: today president biden defended his decision to pull american troops out of afghanistan. there were no apologies about the chaotic evacuation. pres. biden: some say we should have started evacuation soon, could this not have been done in a more ordinary manner? i respectfully disagree. ama: the president called the evacuation and ask ordinary success. he acknowledged up to 200 americans were left behind. president biden said they reached

and sean hayes will be behind the desk wednesday and thursday.with countless songs, awards, and hair ties to his name. his latest book -- "willie nelson's letters to america" is available now. please welcome willie nelson. [ cheers and applause ] hi. how are you, willie? >> i'm great. how are you doing? >> maren: i'm good. it's so good to see you. i miss texas. i'm jealous that you're there right now. >> yeah. it's great. it's a little warm. but you know, i like it that way. >> maren: yeah. well, i just -- i'm so happy you're here. you're actually my first ever guest to interview while hosting this. so thank you for breaking the ice with me. [ cheers and applause ] i remember i actually met you for the first time at the maui songwriters festival a couple years ago very briefly at danny's house. and it was just such an amazing night because you got up and played with lucas and micah and i remember steven tyler got up and played. it was sort of like living in a -- an lsd trip of some sort. [ laughter ] but such a beautiful place. so how many -- i k

kellyanne conway and sean spicer lashing out at president biden after he called for 18 trump appointees to resign. she said president biden i'm resigning but you should. joining me now hayesa gift to political friends of a president especially as they are going out the door. these are the doors that advise non-binding advice to places like the john f. kennedy of performing artarts. all the military academy board of visitors have a number of seats that are given to the president to fill. at the end of every administration, you see a situation where people who have been loyal to the outgoing president, the outgoing administration are given seat ons the board but trump was egregious about giving the spots to people who had no real need to be on the boards. she was on the air force academy's board of visitors. their board of directors. she's never been in the air force. she had no connection to the air force. she was given it as a gift and i think this really highlights the fact that it's a system that is basically more about patronism than helping the institutions at this point. >> you say she was on the air force academy board and wasn't qualified to be there but what role