know so much about michael scarn? well, because i am michael scarn. all: oh! [applauding] [music - "threat level midnight"] aw, yeah. "threat level midnight" makes all the birdies feel all right, from madonna to madeline albright. "threat level midnight," it's a threat, a level, a level, level threat. he's the greatest hockey star i ever seen yet. threat level what? midnight. threat level who? michael scarn. threat level why? apartheid. gotta fight it. free mandela. peace, i'm out. ♪ ♪ >> announcer: from the most trusted journalists at comedy central... it's america's only source for news. this is "the daily show" with your host, jon stewart! ♪ ♪ [cheers and applause] ♪ ♪ >> jon: welcome to "the daily show!" how are you? my name is jon stewart. thank you! [cheers and applause] we've got a great show tonight. i am very excited. as you can see, i am fully healed. you see, this is what caused all the commotion. they glued it back together. where is it? they glued it back together. that's all. that's it. that is what nearly brought an old man down. a tiny puncture