greg gutfeld, do you remember that shot? day, i still don't like you. >> greg: america is talking. >> brian: you remember that? >> greg: what was that, fort lee, new jersey? why am i talking to you? >> dana: i'm going to wrap it up, are you ready? so as you know, greg and i have been on the show since the beginning and it has been great working with him all these years p or he has really actually been putting nice to me come in fact even said hello to me this week. when we first started, they sat us together and greg is so short, they almost called at the 4 1/2. also, greg, we got a call this morning from scott adams, wants to wish you a happy birthday, says congratulations, take the week off next week, and just make sure the lawn is cut extra short next week for him and then we will all drink to that. and then just sent us a nice note. happy birthday, dad, but if you want to live with a hairy little guy who smells bad and make strange bodily noises you could have stayed with one of the other puppies in his letter. why do we

[cheers and applause] >> that's awesome, i would like to thank greg gutfeld. crisco cooking book is fantastic. it's great. >> brian: fall right out of your hand it would be so slippery. i thought it was interesting. i thought greg initially when i heard greg was going one-on-one i thought it was going to be him. so great he made him part of the gut if he would experience. >> ainsley: me too. something we haven't seen before. >> brian: he thrives in this. >> lawrence: crack jokes on him, too. the president just flourished in the middle of it. but i think it highlights his greatest asset. when he is with people, is he at his best. >> steve: very charming. >> lawrence: when people meet him their impression is different. >> ainsley: he smiled when he said loves diet coke and hates the woke. >> brian: announced yesterday not only the first president to ever use bitcoin to make a purchase. he bought a bunch of hamburgers also announced he is going to springfield next two weeks. i think it's going to be big. >> lawrence: still is a big story, brian. despite all the --

your face, donald trump will be joining greg gutfeld and his team. do not want to miss it. have a great night. ♪ ♪ >> greg: all right. first of all, i would like to apologize to tonight's audience and the viewers at home we will not be airing a cooking segment tonight. we apologize to mr. do see but you will still be able to get his new book cooking with crisco for free. instead we have a very special show tonight, let's welcome our guests, she is still quite humourous with a fetus in her uterus. "new york times" best-selling author or -- author kat. she is from san francisco but she will appreciate indoor plumbing, emily compagno! "new york times" best-selling author and comedian tyrus! and he loves diet coke, but hates the woke. choosing this insanity over sean "hannity". let's crank it up to 11 for president 45 and 47. the 44th president of the united states donald j trump! [applause] there you go. so, how was your golf game? >> mr. trump: i have not been thinking about it too much lately. they always say golf is a very dangerous game. >> greg: it

he taped that before the rally so came -- was in the city for greg gutfeld show in this building andt out to long island. you went out there, too, to the nassau coliseum. >> brian: i haven't been there since the islanders played in there. >> brian: how many can be in there. >> brian: 16,000. not one i talked to got in line before. most of them were day the day before or in the morning they allowed them in. then 10:00 was the latest. i looked out and provided the video. there was 5,000 at minimum outside that couldn't get in watching on flat screens. think about that, you wait 8 hours, can't get in, you morted in a. you sit there indian style or native american style. >> ainsley: crisscross apple sauce. >> brian: crisscross, apple sauce? what, am i 9? >> steve: crisco flashback. >> brian: don't eat it, it's good. hthat's why he think he will win new york. you will find out if anybody was bbored or left early. >> steve: that was a tease. brook joins us. >> brooke: good morning, former president trump filling up the nassau coliseum area had been trending truck the last few years. roughl

greg gutfeld is standing by to make you smile in friday night. next week, debate week. a great weekend. [ ♪♪ ] [ cheering and applause ] >> greg: yes! all right. okay. [ cheering and applause ]. >> greg: i guess that will do! (laughter). >> greg: it is friday, so you know what that means, let's welcome tonight's guest, he is so bland, he is getting sued by rice cakes. cohost of fox and friends, tyro! he is a lawyer named trustie, like a cop named friskie. former trump attorney, and doj prosecutor. if you bont buy her new book, she will have to learn how to cook, a fox news contributor, kat. he is stronger than gravity, and puts up with my dipravity! [ cheering and applause ]. >> greg: yes. yes. all right. before we get to some new stories, let's to this: [ ♪♪ ] >> greg's leftovers. >> greg: all right, it is leftovers, where i read the jokes we didn't use this week. and as always, it is my first time making them. the movie beetle juice beetle juice opens in theatres today, about a dead guy that wants to return to the land of the living. (laughter). >> greg: that's a blot

i can see the next conversation, hard questions with greg gutfeld. ps. >> jesse: coming up, what caused the famous rock band to throw fists on stage. ♪ clogged gutters can cause big problems fast. until now. call 833-leaffilter today for your free gutter inspection. i've had terrible flooding problems on my porch. now i understand why. right now leaffilter is offering a free inspection, on your schedule. leaffilter is a permanent gutter solution, so you never have to worry about costly damage from clogged gutters again. call us today and schedule your free inspection. to schedule your free inspection, call 833.leaf.filter today or visit leaffilter.com. ♪ >> harold: it was a rock and bottle band. jane's addiction has cancelled their reunion tour after an on-stage brawl. ♪ the lead singer squared up with the guitarist before being dragged off stage after doing a show in boston on friday. the band has since issued a public apology alongside the announcement that the tour will be suspended for a little bit. greg, your thoughts on this saying this kind of

. >> ainsley: i loved seeing him in that setting tomp sit with greg gutfeld and co-hosts who work at fox, a different environment. i thought that was when i heard he was going to be on a show, wait, just it is two of them or will he sit in one of the chairs? i like that, taudience did not know he was going to be on. >> lawrence: gave the president a moment to flourish, he is at his best when he was with everyday people. who knew a billionaire would be relatable with average people. you see it in polling, strong democrats, they like donald trump, though. >> i loved kat timpf's question about aliens, we're paid to talk about politics. average person, if you had a chance to see donald trump, what would you ask and he said a lot of people ask him that. we know because he's talked about releasing the jfk files and people ask did lee harvey oswald act alone. as president, maybe it is national treasure movies with nicholas cage, the big book of answers to all the mysteries in america. >> ainsley: the secrets. >> steve: inflation is killing us, eating us alive. >> lawrence: we want to know t

just a reminder the former president will be with greg gutfeld tonight. that should be interesting. "the five" right now. ♪ ♪ >> greg: hi i'm greg gutfeld along with judge jeanine pirro, harold ford jr., jesse watters, and her life is always under a microscope, dana perino. "the five." ♪ ♪ just moments ago, president trump saying that he feels safe as he storms his old stomping grounds of new york city, where he is said to hold a big rally later tonight. but before that he made one incredibly important pit stop. kicking back with the most handsome host to ever exist. >> mr. p, how is your golf game? >> haven't been thinking about it too much lately. [laughter] i always said golf is a very dangerous game. >> it really is. especially if they are playing with you. >> that's true. >> that was a mean joke? >> pretty sad. >> if they had told you the shooter was there, when you have tried to take him out with your three would? >> i think so. actually, the secret service did a great job. they saw the barrel of the gun, big gun, and it came out through bushes. and how many people would see th

in the meantime, let not your heart be troubled, greg gutfeld is next to put a smile on your face. a great night. [ ♪♪ ] [ cheering and applause ] [ ♪♪ ] [ cheering and applause ] >> greg: i know. i know! i know! [ chuckling ] you are lucky to have me. [ laughter ] happy thursday everybody. so while filming a music video in nashville, von jan gotta-mac jon bon jovi heroically talked a woman off of talk -- jumping off a bridge, by promising to quit making music. [ laughter ] yeah. that is a good one. kamala harris is flying to north carolina to get the undecided votes while joe biden is meeting with st. peter to get the data about. [ laughter ] i get it! more of those jokes. the democrat advises kamala harris not to do more interviews because she could say something that could be used against her, like reminding them she is currently vice president. year congressman fell asleep during actual testimony from families who lost loved ones to illegal immigrant crime. give him a break, he was up all night making lunch. on the view, joe tried to get up popstar ushered to endorse kamala har

i'm greg gutfeld, i love you america. >> trace: good evening, i'm trace gallagher, 11:00 pm on the east coast, 8:00 in los angeles and this is america's late news, "fox news @ night". breaking tonight, just days after the second attempt on his life, former president trump is back in public, or as he says continuing the fight. delivering a strong message to democrats and the liberal media at a raucous long island rally. >> stop the hoaxes, stop the smears, stop the law fare and fake lawsuits against me and stop claiming your opponents will turn america into a dictatorship. give me a break. >> trace: but after years of comparing him to hitler and calling him a threat to democracy, the liberal media somehow still does not quite get it. >> let's stop this both sides stuff because it's not correct. it's not both sides, it's one clear side. >> recognizing that we are all in danger here. >> trace: apparently neither do democrats. >> when you have that kind of microphone in front of you, you really ought to understand at a very deep level how much your words have meaning. >> donald trump is an

your face, donald trump will be joining greg gutfeld and his team.ss it. have a great night. ♪ ♪

"the five" right now. ♪ ♪ >> greg: hi i'm greg gutfeld

greg gutfeld will put a smile on your face. greg g >> see you from philly tomorrow. have a great nighta and have tony orlando. >> he's hung like, wow. >> sorry. happy monday, everyone. so as kamala harris prepares for tomorrow's debatmorrow'se, r aide to hillary clinton is playing trump in mockern isys rehearsals. so if harris loses and that guy goes missinges, know who to blae . bum not saying she kills kills people, but i'm not notno saying it. now, the debate is planned for 90 minutes, which gives kamala's husband which enough time to knock up three nannies. . meanwhile, donald trump is busy trying to make kamala feel at home by also knocking up a nannhome bg upy. the debate is expecteds to feature two commercial breaks, one break to take kamala's wine ordebreak tor andh other to take her second winere order. nancy pelosi claims that trump might skip the debatmight gee, k i know cowardice when i see it. true, it's the fear she seese sz in her husband's eyes when she puts on a one piec here. hey, you disgust me. one challenge for kamala pollster's claimd amon harri

. >> in the meantime, and greg gutfeld, let not your heart be trouble. he's standing by to you. smile this friday night. next week, debate week. >> have a great weekend and all right. okay. i guess that'll do it. welc >> it's friday so you know what that means. let's welcome tonight'ome tonig. he's so bland, he's getting sued by rice cakesy , co-hostd of fox and friends. first, todd pyro. he's a lawyer named trustee,, which is like a cop named frisky, former trump attorney a and doj prosecutor jim trusttty if you don't buy her new book,a she'll have to learn how to cook your ties.ws bestselling author and fox news contributor can tell he's stronger than gravity and puts up with my depravity. "new york times" best yet.. yes. >> all right. before we get to some new stories, let's d o this.greg's >> greg's leftovers. do number up. but above all right, whe it's leftoversre i. week. i read the jokes. we did news this week. and as always,an it's my firsty time reading them, so they . will bake joe mackey into a giant cake and send it to brian stelter. >> now, the movie beetlejuiceetj

. ♪ ♪ >> jesse: hello, everybody, i'm jesse watters along with jujohn jeanine pirro, greg gutfeld, danaino, and jessica tarlov. this is "the five." campaigning like a madman well kamala cowards from the media. during a packed rally in deep blue new york. watch. >> if you vote for me, i'm going to reduce your taxes, reduce your crime, and reduce your levels of stress. of the only thing i will increase are your incomes and your love for your state will come roaring back again. see, the people of new york with crime at record levels, with terrorists and criminals pouring in and with inflation eating your hearts out, vote for donald trump. what the hell do you have to lose? >> jesse: president trump's all about the fine details while kamala's focused on boring you to death about her life and middle-class origin story. meanwhile it turns out she's more elusive than bigfoot. of by her own cult, the harris-walz ticket has done 13 formal interview since becoming the nominee well trump and vance have done 44 formal sitdown spirit of the media is trying to warn speed and being vague might hurt he

[laughter] >> greg: coming up, "gutfeld" features wacky creatures.ause if you have chronic kidney disease, you can reduce the risk of kidney failure with farxiga. because there are places you'd like to be. farxiga can cause serious side effects, including ketoacidosis that may be fatal, dehydration, urinary tract, or genital yeast infections, and low blood sugar. a rare, life-threatening bacterial infection in the skin of the perineum could occur. stop taking farxiga and call your doctor right away if you have symptoms of this infection, an allergic reaction, or ketoacidosis. ♪ farxiga ♪ hey, take a moment. do you know who we are? we are the kids you champion every day. we are the ones who dream big. and because of you, our dreams become a reality. these are more than just words. this is what we're all about. this is shriners children's™. because for more than 100 years now, shriners children's™ has been on a mission to provide the most amazing care anywhere. and guess what? it's working with more than 100 access points to care shriners children's™ a

let not your heart be troubled, greg gutfeld standing by this friday night to put a smile on your faceve a great weekend. [cheering and applause] [cheering and applause] >> get enough, fair enough. all right, i will stay. but only for one drink. it is friday so you know what that means. let's welcome tonight to cast. his razors are the opposite of his act, not terrible. comedian and founder of western razor company, david angelo. she says bless your heart before she rips you apart, cohost of the bottom line. he made his bones killed bad guys with drones, the national security analyst and fox news contributor! [cheering and applause] >>> she went from having scabies to making babies. the best-selling author, cat! [cheering and applause] >> greg: that's my favourite rhyme. scabies and babies. >> that's accurate. >> greg: awesome. before we get to new stories, let's do this. >> announcer: greg's leftovers! >> greg: time for leftovers where read the jokes we did not use this weekend is always it is my first time reading them so if they suck we will just blame the -- blame the writers. >>>

will be joining greg gutfeld and his team. you do not want to miss it. have a great night. ♪ ♪

[applause] greg gutfeld's next. have a great night everybody. [ ♪

>> hello, everyone, i'm judge jeanine pirro along with jessica, jesse watters, dana perino and greg gutfeld. it is 5:00 in new york city and this is "the five." >> judge jeanine: bernie sanders dropping a bombshell on kamala right before the debate. the vice president gearing up for her big showdown with former president donald trump tomorrow night and she's turning to method acting to prepare. according to "new york times," harris' been holdup for five days in a pittsburgh hotel doing highly choreographed sessions with an advisor dressed up like donald trump. there is a stage and replica tv lighting and an advisor in method actor mode, not just playing donald trump, inhabiting him, wearing a boxy suit and long tie. harris will be super careful to pretend she is a moderate. do you think she's abandoning her progressive ideas? >> i don't think she's abandoning her ideals, she's doing what is right to win the election. >> judge jeanine: harris giving this preview how she will attack trump. >> he tends torfight for himself, not the american peoples, i think that will come out during the debate

greg gutfeld standing by this friday night to put a smile on your face, have a great weekend.ause

trump joined gutfeld and america was watching. >> he's got ratings that were through the roof. >> so i take full credit beating every cable and broadcast show in prime. the competition, joe greg more thing, jesse. >> all right, feeding frenzy. let's see itle. >> happy national pepperoni pizza day. >> did you know that pepperoni is america's favorite pizza? topping quiz. >> which topping is the leastles favorite pineapple, anchovies.. >> you're all wrong. great day on the golf coursese: >> today, i played with two former members of the new york giants ofs. >> i think it's pretty clear who they are. r whand we ended up winning the people that didn't playofesi professional sports ended up winning. i got a couple of strokes, though. zachons ende sean, tennis great. >> jesse was primetime tonight h diddy on suicide watch will he epstein himself tonight judge at 8:00. >> okay. all right. it's tim jne: all ime e for talk about being locked up. check out this bozo on miami beach who nosteal but t only tro to steal a car, but pleaded with his victim to let himr car. go after getting trapped inside. take a listen. this is nois is myt your car. this is my car. m but why are you in my ca

let not your heart be troubled, greg gutfeld is next. a great day. [ ♪♪ ] [applause] [applause] >> greg: yes! yes. it appears there is no debate around my sex appeal. happy wednesday, everyone. people are accusing last night's debate moderator of teaming up against trump while letting kamala slide. he was under so much attack you would thank the moderators were working from a slanted roof. it felt like an ambush with kamala and the moderators jumping on trump. i have not seen a three on one so disturbing since i was at the golden girls after party. i just watched. out is what i like to do. understandably, the moderators were heavily criticized for their bias, but they seemed completely unmoved by the critiques. in a biased fact check of trump mirror claimed that crime was down using discredited data from the fbi. david probably still believes that those pictures i took of him really work for a charity calendar. jokes on you. meanwhile, kamala harris referred to january 6 as the greatest attack on american democracy since the civil war. s

will be joining greg gutfeld and his team. you do ♪ ♪ [cheering] thank you, thank you. >> all right, all right first of all i would like to apologize to tonight's audience and viewers at home we will not be airing the steve doocy cooking segment tonight. [laughter] we apologize to mr. doocy butir you'll still be ablein to get hs new book cooking with crisco for freeyo. instead welfare a very special show tonight so let's welcome our guest. she's still quite humorous with a fetus in her uterus "new yorks times" best selling author washington contributor kat timpf she's from san francisco and appreciates indoor plumbingsh co-host emily.e n itfr is deltoid deflect an asteroid comedian former champion tyrus. and he loves diet coke but hates the woke. choosing this insanity over shaun hannity let's crank it up to 11 for president 45 and 47, the man --p interest rates -- in the red corner from queens new york -- president of the united statesid donald j. trump. [applause] there you go. [laughter] so -- mr. p, how's your golf game? >

i'm greg gutfeld, see you wednesday.cheering] >> laura: good evening, i'm laura ingraham, this is "the ingraham angle" from washington. my angle in a moment. first, the big debate is tomorrow night. new polls show donald trump regaining ground in a poll by nate silver. and vice president joy, as things stand today, she's losing. as far as debate prep goes, one could argue trump has been getting ready for what, nine years or so? since 2015 really. unlike harris, he has an actual record to run on, not run from. what is kamala's vibe today? >> yes, i am. yes. >> part of debate prep for you? >> being at the spice store is so far. james e >> laura: this your oura is. they don't want a repeat of the 2020 debate. on friday politico admitted her advisers were scrambling after rules to mute the mics were finalized. she could get thrown off by the muted mics. they are preparing for that possibility. now we know why kamala fought hard to change the debate rules. she claimed they were worried trump couldn't control himself. it is be

[applause] greg gutfeld's next. have a great night everybody. [ ♪ ] [ applause ] >> greg: thank you. can somebody help that poor woman who fainted? happy thursday everyone. this fall, chris christie will teacher's class at el on how to run a political campaign. he will discuss everything he's ever done and then say don't do that. the class will only be open to ten students because that's the most that will fit in there with him. the class will be very inclusive considering he is fluent in over eight sandwiches. [ laughter ] and any student bringing an apple should be aware he won't accept it unless it's dipped in caramel. >> he's a friend. >> greg: kamala harris has been criticized for bringing tim walz along with her for tonight interview but supporters say america is used to her dragging around a creepy old white guy. [ applause ] >> greg: she claimed she once worked at mcdonald's but people are finding it very hard to verify this although one former employee says she did put him in jail. why would she lie? anyway,

oprah today for a virtual conversation, she has a tough act to follow after donald trump joined greg gutfeld went after the media. watch. >> the media is dishonest and corrupt. i walked off and they said i'm the goat in debates. i had a lot of debates and goat means greatest of all time. i walked off that stage and thought i had the best debate. i was unfairly treated by the anchors, i am not fans of them anymore. >> todd: caroline, great to have you here, how great forum is late-night show like gutfeld for donald trump to show his lighter and funnier side? >> it is perfect. this is where he thrives, kamala could not survive in a setting like this, you have to make jokes and take jokes. you have to absorb funny heat. it is not necessarily a polished, scripted venue. i think trump really proved he can go in alternative media ecosystems in way kamala can't. it has to be curated, like sitting down with oprah, for a puff piece in video form. >> todd: you pose the question, how would kamala do, her latest word salad might give an indication, take a look. >> i grew up understanding that children o

so objective journalism with greg gutfeld excluded seems to be dead.he standard for public figures. it makes it hard for a public figure to sue for defamation. if we don't have prosecution, and i am not a fan of criminalizing poor speech, even if it is free, but if we don't have prosecution, we should have some avenue for readdressing -- to start to rail these people in. >> greg: i kind of agree. i am defamed regularly, but i also defame regularly. >> right. you are what we call the full employment act for lawyers. it is going to work out well. >> greg: yes. yes. on the one hand someone will call me a nazi, and i will talk about brian stelter being fat until my head explodes. what is worse? kat? >> i can take it from here. (laughter). >> it is fried. i honestly think that the harris campaign needs to go out, and as the kids say, touch grass. because the fact they hear something like this and think it is plausible that jd vance would say that school shootings, yeah, not a big deal is crazy. it proves that you are -- we are so divided at this point that

i'm greg gutfeld, i love you america. >> trace: good evening, i'm trace gallagher. 11:00 pm o

greg gutfeld is next to put a smile on your face. have a great night. [cheering and applause] [ whistling ] >> greg: you filthy people. i know what you are thinking. happy wednesday everyone. joe biden appeared on the view today where cohost sarah hans said it's like having one of the beatles at the table. true if you're talking about george or john. >> thought more like yoko. >> kamala harris will visit the southern border friday and says she's looking forward to meeting justin trudeau. at the last debate she said she was a middle-class kid. it appears harris enjoyed things most middle-class kids didn't like living abroad, private school, growing up at some of the wealthiest places on earth. the only thing she didn't enjoy was anani. i like her husband. [cheering and applause] >> that was a long way for a cheap joke. you're welcome america. new cdc data shows u.s. obesity rates have fallen for the first time ever. just like the crime statistics the they left at the cities of new orleans, los angeles and the view. reports claim i u.s. woman died inside s

greg gutfeld will put a smile on your face. you in philly tomorrow, have a good night. >> ♪ ♪ [cheering and applause] [laughter] >> greg: yeah! yeah! [laughter] tony orlando? his -- sorry. [laughter] happy monday, everyone. so with kamala harris preparing for tomorrow's debate at a former aide to hillary clinton is playing trump in mock rehearsals. so if harris loses in that guy goes missing, you know who to blame. [laughter] i'm not saying she kills people. but i'm not not saying it. know the debate is planned for 90 minutes which gives kamala's has been dug enough time to knock up three nineties. [laughter] meantime donald trump is busy trying to make kamala feel at home by also knocking up in 90. [laughter] the debate is expected to feature two commercial breaks one break to take kamala's wine order, and the other to take her second wine order. nancy pelosi claim that trump might get the debate, saying "i know cowardice when i see it." drew clark is the fear that she seize on her husband's eyes when she puts on a one-piece. [

stations. >> jesse: happy in the coal mines. >> greg: exactly, coal mines are underrated beard. >> kennedy: enough about those children making your gutfeld well done. >> kennedy: "one more thing" is up next. stay with us. ♪ ♪ ♪ when you have moderate to severe eczema, it's okay to show off. with dupixent, show off your clearer skin and less itch. because you have plenty of reasons to show off your skin. with dupixent, the #1 prescribed biologic by dermatologists and allergists, you can stay ahead of your eczema. it helps block a key source of inflammation inside the body that can cause eczema to help heal your skin from within. many adults saw 90% clearer skin, some even achieved long-lasting clearer skin and fast itch relief after first dose. serious allergic reactions can occur that can be severe. tell your doctor about new or worsening eye problems such as eye pain or vision changes including blurred vision, joint aches and pain, or a parasitic infection. don't change or stop asthma medicines without talking to your doctor. show off to the world. ask your eczema specialist about dupixent. (♪) hey lexus, show alternate routes. technolo

i'm dana perino along with judge jeanine pirro, jesse watters, and greg gutfeld.s 5:00 in new york city. this is "the five." ♪ ♪ president biden and vice president harris facing criticism further delayed response to hurricane helene over 120 people are confirmed dead and over 600 remained missing after the category form storm led category -- across the southeast. more than 2 million remain without power for several days and thousands are cut off from communication after towns were completely wiped out by the wrath of the storm. president biden pressed by a reporter of why he spent his time not in washington, d.c. >> the hurricane, why weren't you and vice president harris commanding this this weekend? >> president biden: i was on the phone for at least two hours yesterday in the day before as well. telephone. all my security people. >> kamala harris changing her schedule after fishing backlash for attending fund-raisers. the vp will be receiving a briefing at fema headquarters in washington any moment now. the white house defended their responses. >> president bid

let not your heart be troubled, greg gutfeld is next to put a smile on your face. a great night. [ cheering and applause ] [♪♪] >> greg: yes, yes, yeah, yeah, yeah. i know. i like my haircut. happy tuesday, everyone. scientists have discovered what they call a third state of existence. somewhere between life and death. no kidding. democrats responded to the second assassination attempt on trump by turning down the rhetoric by comparing the former president to mussolini. in a rare sign of unity, maxine waters has offered to schedule his next tee time. the biden a ministration has promised to beef up security for president trump. using the same agents that protect kamala from reporters. a neighbor of the accused gunman says the family was weird and kept a live horse in their home. further proof that the suspect was unstable. [ laughter ] >> greg: it's okay to boo that one. i felt the same way. an investigation into the immigrant crisis in springfield, ohio reveals that auto accidents have increased four fold. i did not know the haitians were all women. rfk junior is

greg gutfeld is standing by to put a smile on your face. thank you for being with us. have a great mind. ♪ ♪ [cheering and applause] [laughter] >> stop it! stop it! stop it! i would blush if i had any blood in my body. happy thursday everyone. it's been two days since cnn announced they are bringing back brian stelter, two days and already jake tapper has had to bring back his refrigerator lock. once again the biden doj has formerly accused russia of election interference. i guess what is old is new if your president has dementia. [laughter] liz cheney says she is voting for kamala harris. >>> well then kamala has my vote says one man. that's benedict arnold for all of you nonhistory buffs. a las vegas woman told police she stole an expensive casket containing a body because she blacked out from drinking. but don't worry the corpse was returned safely. [laughter] hunter biden pled guilty to tax evasion. he tried to use an alford plea which would allow him to plead guilty while maintaining his innocence. se wanted to to have it both ways. which he also wrote off on his

i'm greg gutfeld, i love you, america. >>> good evening, 11:00 pm on the east coast, 8:00 in los angeles

greg gutfeld is standing by to put a smile on your face. have a great night. lause] ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ >> greg: yes! yes. yes. all right, i will take it, for now. happy monday, everyone. last friday joe biden turned over a cabinet meeting to his wife. if that is not bad enough he then put hunter in charge of the medicine cabinet. man boobs. vice president harris will skip this fund-raising dinner, a feature which traditionally shows presidential candidates roasting each other. she pulled out at the last minute. if only her husband had done the same thing with the nanny. terrible. this person was criticized for saying that kamala harris is not black. she would know, her brother michael was a white one. and a beautiful one at that, rest in peace. hillary clinton argued that kamala harris does not need to clarify her policy positions to her various critics and instead recommends simply killing them. the menendez brothers series on netflix is facing backlash over the allegations of sibling incest. i don't see the big deal, says one woman. i don't know why, i don't understand

i'm dana perino along with judge jeanine jr., harold ford jr., jesse watters, and greg gutfeld. 5:00 in new york city, and this is "the five." ♪ ♪ well, apparently, greg, it was a showdown for the ages. donald trump met kamala harris, squaring off for their first debate, the night starting out with a handshake that quickly darted a makers. >> she doesn't have a plan, she copied biden's plan and it is like for sentences, like run spot run p or g is going to my philosophy. i was going to send her a maga hat. >> in the course of his rallies he talks about fictional characters like hannibal lector. he will talk about windmills cause cancer. and what you will also notice is people start leaving his rallies early out of exhaustion and boredom. >> i'm talking now. if you don't mind. please. does that sound familiar? >> donald trump was fired by 81 million people. what you think is a friendship with what is known to be a dictator, who would eat you for lunch. >> quiet, please. she is going to do all of these wonderful things. why hasn't she done it? she has been there for three and a ha

let not your heart be troubled, greg gutfeld is next to put a smile on your face. ] [♪♪

will be joining greg gutfeld and his team. you do

gutfeld last night. >> i did. happy birthday, gregjanice: happy birthday greg gutfeld. >> terry, stacey. >> where are you from. >> delaware. >> jack from florida. >> janice: i love it. let's do some weather, okay? beautiful here in new york city. i think you guys brought the great weather. it's going to be a good weekend here in the northeast. we still are tracking tropical storm disturbance that brought power outages to louisiana. here it is right now across the ohio valley, the tennessee valley. weakening but still going to bring a lot of rain to these areas. just be extra careful. we also have an area of disturbed weather that could bring the potential for some inclement weather along the southeast coast. all right, do you love ainsley? >> yea. >> hi ainsley. >> ainsley: hi, everyone. we love you, too. thank you. >> janice: mornings are better with friends. they are especially on a friday. thank you so much, janice. well, it's a battleground barn storm for vice president harris, politico detailing her campaign's new push to bolster

i'm judge jeanine pirro, along with harold ford jr., jesse watters, gillian turner, and greg gutfeld.s 5:00 in new york city, and this is "the five." ♪ ♪ >> please welcome kamala harris! [cheers and applause] >> can you feel, can you feel the joy rising in here? >> i can. >> judge jeanine: lord help us. kamala harris getting the softball sit down of the century with oprah winfrey. the media mogul hosting a star-studded town hall for the vice president, inviting a bunch of fallen fawning a-list celebrities to kiss her butt and act like they are so excited. >> hello, president harris. [cheers and applause] >> 47 days. >> 47 days. >> i've always been a fan of kamala. >> everyone is so energized. >> in this campaign, to beautiful, wonderful kamala harris. >> judge jeanine: for all of that hollywood glam couldn't save kamala from being her usual train wreck self. harris painfully rambled through the simplest questions about the economy and the border. it even force oprah at one point to swoop in and bail her out. >> yours is a story i hear around the country as i travel, and in terms of bo

but in the meantime, let not your heart be troubled, greg gutfeld. he will put a smile on your face this friday night. face thave a great weekend. [chr stay. yes. all right. >> yes. yes. let not your be troubled.troubl it's fridaedy so you know means what that means. >> let's welcome tonight's guest. she's witnesse, s welcoms more n a cashier at a waffle house. host of outtake this morning. charlie arnott got three things wrong. if it seems like he's judging you, that's his jof itb. that's >> comedian vids august. her husband tried to convince bd her that talking is bad for the baby. "new york times" best selling authorfor the baby.est-sell foxr kat timpf. and you need sir edmund see he has dandruff. "new york times" best selling author, comedian and formeff.r n world champion tyron. all right, all right. all right. ge >> right. all right. before we get to some news stories, let's d so this. greg's leftovers. yeah, it's leftovers where i read jokes. i we did news this week, and as always, it's mt isy first time reading them, so if they will by joe ma