and jay leno might be back for that.ayor ed lee declared this jay leno day in san francisco. >> two concerts in two years they have raised $8 million with a lot more to go for the new hospital. in san francisco, don sanchez, "abc 7 news." >> it is 4:45, new information about the earthquake that hit off the coast of alaska and is generating a tsunami warning. that story is coming up. >> and report cashed for san francisco's muni. if you are waiting for a bus this morning, find something to pass the time. >> and critics are asking full body scanners tell the difference between under arm sweat and an underwear bomb? >> and ducks in distress from a south bay complex is a lot more challenging then investigators thought. >> if you think gas prices shoot up faster3q septic system breakdowns affect over one million homes each year, causing a disgusting mess and hours of repair. the powerful formula in rid-x has enzymes to immediately break down waste and bacteria that work continuously to reduce tank build-up. use rid-x once a m

and jay leno might be back for that. ed lee declared this jay leno day. >> it's amazing what they have done with two concerts. they have raised $8 million with a lot more to go for the new hospital. in san francisco, don sanchez, "abc 7 news." >> i want to see that car collection. 5:44. wall street reacts to the jobs report. >> another report card for muni, if you are waiting for a bus, give yourself something to pass the time. >> and now we apologize this a story about ducks who have been injured by blowgun darts. we'll have the latest on that coming up. >> stick around. ♪ why settle for a one-note cereal? get more with honey bunches of oats. four nutritious grains come together for more taste, more texture, more healthy satisfaction. have a bowl of happy. >>> welcome back. a reminder of the high surf advisory, it's been extended until 9:00 sunday evening down around l.a. and down to san diego. let's talk about the forecast for california. it's hot through the central valleys, to near hundred, 72 with sunshine around bi

>>reporter: laugh from jay leno. music and raising 5 million dollars for the new uc sf children hospital. >> i like this an people say if you go and tell these jokes it raise this much money. it's not really hard work. it's a great cause. easy to see why the celebrity are so supportive but the generosity is overwhelming. >>reporter: just like he said. many donated 100 million dollars to build children hospital and this is what they do. little 4-year-old grace of pedestrian mont diagnosed with severe scoliosis and wore a breast for 10 years. but uc sf doctor had something innovativ innovative. >> he performed the staple surgery on her back to avoid her wearing a brace. >>reporter: the brace would have been for a listening timeism at least 10 years. not a lot of research that child in her age it even works. >>reporter: that was 5 weeks ago and look at her now. >> i like to play with my friends. >>reporter: hospital focus on the latest medical research that can make a difference in people's lives. new being is already u

. >> alanis morissette and jay lenoe and m.c.re in san francisco last night but it was more than a concert. don sanchez was there as celebrities teamed up to help raise money for a new children's hospital in san francisco. >> this aftershock scam, it's not an aftershock, it's another earthquake. >> getting laughs from jay leno. ♪ >> and music from alanis morissette and raising $5 million for children's hospital. >> i like to tell jokes and it's fun. if you go here and tell jokes, you will raise money, it's a great cause. it's easy to see why the celebrities are so supportive but their generosity is overwhelming. >> just like this. they donated $100 million to build children's hospital and this is what they do. little four-year-old grace rigo was diagnosed with severe scoliosis and may have had to wear a brace for ten years but a doctor had some innovative. >> he performed a staple surgery to avoid her wearing a brace. >> brace would have been a long time? >> at least ten years and there is a not a research that it even works. >>

jay leno in town tonight, just down the street.d the tonight show and flew up, there he is with mayor ed lee. he was mcing a fund raider. they are looking for -- fundraiser. they are looking for a new hospital. he received a proclamation from the mare saying it was jay leno day and i got to laugh. he is quick, pam. he goes, boy, it's 8:00 at night, i feel short changed, i only got four hours to make use of it. allants morris set was also forming tonight. they are trying to get the new hospital built. >> all right vern, thank you. >>> and thank you for being with us. we will see you tomorrow night everybody.

in a moment, reality check, jay leno going after michele bachmann. we will show you how that went down in just a few moments. >> bill: back of the book segment tonight, reality check where we span the globe for stories that need clarifying. check one, jay leno a usually fair mild interviewer interested in laughs. the other night michele bachmann appeared and he didn't like that the congresswoman criticized rick perry over his vaccine mandate. >> is that bad? i mean, is the vaccine to prevent, what is it cervical cancer? >> well, it's hpv, and the concern is that there is, you know, potentially side effects that can come with something like that. it gives a false sense of assurance to a young woman when she has that that if she is sexually active that she doesn't have to worry about sexually transmitted diseases. and that's not necessarily sure. >> it can prevent cervical cancer, correct. >> again, it's something that potentially could have dangerous side effects. >> you said a woman come up to you and her daughter took the vaccine and suffered from,

in a moment, reality check, jay leno going after michele bachmann.e will show you how that went down in just a few moments. let's see if we can get one past the defense. hut! go! here it comes! right on the numbers! boom! get it! spin! oh, nice hands! chest bump. ugh! od job, man. nice! oky, halftime. now, this is my favorite play. oh! i'm wide open. oh, fumble. fumble. don't want to fumble any of these. [ male announcer ] share what you love, with who you love. kellogg's frosted flakes. it's up... and it's good! good?! they're grrreat! what's vanishing deductible all about ? guys, it's demonstration time. let's blow carl's mind. okay, let's say i'm your insurance deductle. every year you don't have an accident, $100 vanishes. the next year, another $100. where am i going, carl ? the next year... that was weird. but awesome ! ♪ nationwide is on your side >> bill: back of the book segment tonight, reality check where we span the globe for stories that need clarifying. check one, jay leno a usually fair mild interviewer interested in laughs. the other

. >> it's "the tonight show with jay leno." tonight jay welcomes former vice president dick cheney. carrot top. oh, mmm, oh, oh, hold on. six legs, two hearts and a pending indictment for war crimes at the hague. mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm. name three things that the tonight show panel possessions. [laughter] that's why carson was the greatest. that's going to be a hard one to explain to the aliens who visit this earth. but, of course, for me the highlight of cheney's tour began yesterday when he, along with his wife lynn, dropped in on the ladies of the view. >> mr. vice president, i want to talk about this little bulge here. [laughter] >> jon: i'm guessing that line was especially unsettling on "the view's" radiobroadcast. >> last year ago june, i went into end-stage heart failure. in effect my heart wasn't pumping enough blood to surface my organ. [laughter] >> jon: go on. >> this is the control element that runs it. the actual pump itself is inside my chest. you need power all the time, 24 hours a day, seven days a week. [beeping] >> what does that mean? >> put the battery back. [laught

jay leno has a terrible pick for a new white house budget ofce. find out, next.e's only one bottle left ! i've got to tell susie ! the vending machine on elm is almost empty. i'm on it, boss. new pony sorry ! we are open for business. let's reroute greg to fresn growing businees use machine-to-machine technology from verizon wireless. susie ! the vending machine... already filled. cool be. because the business with the best technology rules. so i took my heartburn pill and some antacids. we're having mexican tonight, so another pill then? unless we eat later, then pill later? if i get a snack now, pill now? skip the snack, pill later... late dinner, pl w? aghh i've got heartburn in my head. [ male announcer ] stop the madness of treating frequent heartburn. it's simple with prilosec otc. one ll a day. twenty-four hos. zero heartburn. no heartburn in the first place. great. >> greta: time for last call. you know the u.s. is running up debt but jay leno found a guy living like that who has bills to prove it here is a bizarre story. seems zrern's television consumer

jay leno will tell you.@?ing ] ♪ hush, little baby ♪ don't you cry ♪ soon the sun ♪ is going to shine ♪ [ male announcer ] toyota presents the prius family. ♪ walk if i want, talk if i want ♪ [ male announcer ] there's the original one... the bigger one... the smaller one... and the one that plugs in. they're all a little different, just like us. gives you a 50% annual bonus! so you earn 50% more cash. according to research, everybody likes more cash. well, almost everybody... ♪ would you like 50% more cash? no! but it's more money. [ male announcer ] the new capital one cash rewards card. the card for people who want 50% more cash. what's in your wallet? woah! [ giggles ] woah! with olay challenge that. regenerist day and night duo. the uv lotion helps protect skin and firms during the day. the eam hydrat to firat night. gravity doesn't stand a chance. regenerist, from olay. i've got to tell susie ! the vending machine on elm is almost empty. i'm on it, boss. new pony sorry ! we are open for business. let's r

jay leno will tell you. our seat? got the mirrors all adjusted? you can see everything ok?n't want you going out on those yet. and leave your phone in your purse, i don't want you texting. >> daddy... ok! ok, here you go. >> thanks dad. >> and call me--but not while u're driving. we knew this day was coming. that's why we bought a subaru. helps defends against occasional constipation, diarrhea, gas and bloating. with the strains of good bacteria to help balance your colon. you had me at "probiotic." [ female announcer ] phillips' colon health. gives you a 50% annual bonus! so you earn 50% more cash. according to research, everybody likes more cash. well, almost everybody... ♪ would you like 50% more cash? no! but it's more money. [ male announcer ] the new capital one cash rewards card. the card for people who want 50% more cash. what's in your wallet? woah! [ giggles ] i've got to tell susie ! the vending machine on elm is almost empty. i'm on it, boss. new pony sorry ! we are open for business. let's reroute greg to fresn growing businees use machine-to-machine technology

jay leno has a terrible pick for a new white house budget office. find out, next.only one bottle left ! i've got to tell susie ! the vending machine on elm is almost empty. i'm on it, boss. new pony sorry ! we are open for business. let's reroute greg to fresn growing businees use machine-to-machine technology from verizon wireless. susie ! the vending machine... already filled. cool be. because the business with the best technology rules. >>. >> @?Ñ [ beeping ] ♪ hush, little baby ♪ don't you cry ♪ soon the sun ♪ is going to shine ♪ [ male announcer ] toyota presents the prius family. ♪ walk if i want, talk if i want ♪ [ male announcer ] there's the original one... the bigger one... the smaller one... and the one that plugs in. they're all a little different, just like us. >> greta: time for last call. you know the u.s. is running up debt but jay leno found a guy living like that who has bills to prove it here is a bizarre story. seems zrern's television consumer trouble shooter. you know they have guys named tino filed for chapter 7 after running out a $78 milli

jay leno brought up her criticism of fellow candidate rick perry and his mandate that preteen girls get vaccinated against a possible risk of cervical cancer. >> it gives a false sense of assurance to a young woman when she has that if she's sexually active she doesn't have to worry about sexually transmitted diseases. that's not necessarily true. >> not necessarily assurance, it can prevent cervical cancer, correct? >> again, it's something that could have dangerous side effects. also the fact of crony capitalism. >> but parents can opt out of it. i don't want my daughter to have it. >> you can opt out. the way that these work is the fact when you have to opt out, you have to be very proactive. people just assume that the government does what's best for you. my experience has been that's not always necessarily the case. >> you know, if you become president, and you seem pretty strident in your views, could you compromise -- >> convicted. i'm convicted. >> you're not convicted until after you're in office. that's later. that's later. >> so bachmann says the hpv vaccine has risks. but sh

i wish jay leno or i -- it is either of our guesses. we are slightly higher last time i checked.be getting a bounce from the beat down we saw last week and that saw the dow and broader s&p 500 off 6 1/2%. let me tell you a secret about buying stocks in the stock market. it is similar to buying groceries at the supermarket. when things are on sale, which is another way at what the market is doing right now. there are a lot of bargain hunters. so we could see a little bump when wall street opens tomorrow morning. >> a lot of concern about the european markets. this current crisis in europe -- i hear it could make the 2008 meltdown look tame by comparison. i wonder if you are hearing anything like that from the imf and world bank meeting in washington. >> that's actually the scariest thing i'm hearing right now. leaders are meeting in washington right now and it could make 2008 look like small potatoes because 2008, remember, was a banking crisis that stemmed from the housing sector. and this could be much worse. this could be a solvency crisis, versus liquidity crisis. business lea

jay leno and allah nis more seth are on the stage together. >> leno is flying up after he does "the tonight show." it's part of a benefit for the children's hospital. alaniss more seth will perform, too. >> it sounds nice. >> and the weather is nice? >> it will be good for square all the way to labor day weekend. we're looking at hot weather. low 90s and not too much fog in the coast. low 70s at the coast. but we're stressing with warmer weather coming back to the coast into saturday, we're going to have some high waves and upwards of eight feet and some potentially dead rip current so you need to monitor that if your heading into the water to take a break from the warmth. >> so through saturday. >> and maybe sunday, just to be careful. >> good advice, thanks. >>> thanks for joining us. "the nightly news" is next. bye-bye. swipe your card please. excuse me...? this belongs to you... o...um...thank you. excuse me... this is yours... thank you! you're welcome. with chase freedom, you get cash back on what you buy everyday. this is yours! thank you! that's 5% cash back in bonus categories ever

. -- jay leno with what is ahead. >> albert brooks is on the program. >> temperatures trending downwardow 70's. a sprinkle tomorrow. temperatures in the 50's for highs on saturday and sunday. some fall weather. find your jacket or sweater for this weekend. >> and you for joining us this evening. the tonight show is next. >> announcer: it's "the tonight show tonight, jay welcomes --

jay leno is up next with "the tonight show." >> good night, folks. >> announcer: it's "the tonight

richard branson, steven speilberg and jay leno all have dyslexia. >>> my conversation with these twoed back our family tree more than 3 million years. what does that mean for medicine and what really makes us all human? almost tastes like one of jack's cereals. fiber one. uh, forgot jack's cereal. [ jack ] what's for breakfast? um... try the number one! [ jack ] yeah, this is pretty good. [ male announcer ] half a day's worth of fiber. fiber one. if you have painful, swollen joints, i've been in your shoes. one day i'm on p of the world... the next i'm saying... i have this thing called psoriatic arthritis. i had some intense pain. it progressively got worse. my rheumatologist told me about enbrel. i'm surprised how quickly my symptoms have been managed. [ male announcer ] because enbrel suppresses your immune system, it may lower your ability to fight infections. serious, sometimes fatal events including infections, tuberculosis, lymphoma, other cancers, and nervous system and blood disorders have occurred. before starting enbrel, your doctor should test you for tuberculosis and dis

it's jay leno. [ "star wars

. >> jay leno is next. >> bye-bye. >>> announcer: it's "the tonight show

. >> jay leno is next. see you later. >>> and now, another viewpoint. >> i'm suzanne shaw.ur challenge to the 49ers and raiders management to take every step to stop fan violence sparked your attention. ramona remembers that violent preseason game. many people were blitzed by the time the coin was tossed. alcohol should be banned from the tailgating parties. kevin counters, no, don't ban alcohol, instead, set up beer gardens and set up tvs. if you appear to be drunk, you're not allowed in. there's no need to reinvent the stadium safety security wheel, managers should learn from the zero tolerance policy at at&t. and britta advises more severe consequences will make the biggest impact. ws vyoie aretamp i t ous he t debate at nbceditorials.com. tonigh

jay leno is next. get your webcam going. >> good night.

he announced the run for governor on the jay leno show back in august 2003. in an interview published, he says he was booked to promote his film, but on the way to the show, he decided to announce his run for governor. he said, quote, i thought, well, this will freak everyone out. i will be so funny that i will announce that i am running and i told him i was running and two months later, i was governor. arnold schwarzenegger says his decision to run for governor surprised his friends and even his wife. he said he assured everyone that he had no plans to run for office. >>> traffic could be a nightmare in san francisco this weekend because of three major events. the three-day harley strictly blue grass concert started today. 60,000 visitors are expected each day. another 45,000 people are expected to visit tomorrow for the kick-off of the open convention. that will run through next week. on top of that, psych lis will head their monthly critical mass event tonight. >>> 4:53. traffic. >> it sounds like a traffic trifecta. good morning. let's go out and happy fr

cold open, and the program begins with jay leno green his gues

quickly, to jay leno how busy? he taped the tonight show, got on a plane, flew appeaflu-of.lee. and the u. ss of children's hospital with allanis morrisette >> a nice event. >> we will be right back with coming up at the box office man: we need a good night's sleep. woman: which means a little heat to keep us warm. and a good dose of support for my back. some over-the-top comfort couldn't hurt. and our perfect dream factory's been built. you're feeling sleepy already? nighty-night. [giggling] >> a thriller and two horro films >> you are in the same! >> the psychological thriller " to the debt " he. helen mirren is forced to relive the 1966 recapture of a nazi war criminal. >> sam worthington fans the debt is worth british are. >> we nevdo not send the men to the moon. a 1974 top-secret missions that nasa does not want you to know about apollo 18. apollo 18 is rated pg-13 >> it is all fun and games until somebody gets hurt in a 3 d horror film. shark night. they cannot get away until something goes very wrong. the lake is swarming with sharks and the are forced to fight for t

i announced i was running on jay leno and was governor a month after. >>> the dow started the day up 200 then fell back into negative territory before rallying. the dow is up 143 points the nasdaq was off 10. the labor department reported 391,000 new unemployment claims being filed last week. that might sound like a lot but it's actually 37,000 fewer than the previous week. and the lowest amount since april. however it still wasn't enough to budge the unemployment rate from 9.1%. >>> economists are also taking a wait and see approach before declaring this the start of a trend. >>> hewlett packered ceo is being the well compensated before he leaves office. the during his 11 month tenure hp lost about $40 billion. the new ceo meg whitman gets $1 a year in salary plus stock objection, hp chairs and a target bonus of almost $2 million. >>> supervisors want to crack down on problem parking lots in the city, the issue is violence in popular night life neighborhoods like north beach. people looking for trouble are drawn to the crowds and excitement especially on the weekend. >> if they have

comedian jay leno opened the fund raising concert and he had the crowd in stitches. leno led a line up of stars for the benefit. the evening started with a cocktail party as donors and staff celebrated with champane. >> we were limited with space. this will allow us to serve the children. >> thank you. >> who do you want to say thank you to? >> to my doctor. >> reporter: the new 183 bed children's hospital is now under construction in san francisco's mission day neighborhood. along with a new women's hospital and cancer center. >> we still have about $220 million to raise. it's a lot of money. on the other hand this is incredibly generous community and people are willing to invest in the future of the children and really in the future of this city. >>> a city that's getting star power tonight to help raise the needed funds. >> i like hearing the people laugh and they say, we raised all this money. so it works out okay. >>> after leno grammy award winning singer alanis morisett took the stage. today's event raised $5 million for the hospital. jana katsuyama, ktvu chan

i announced i was running on jay leno and was governor a month after. >>> the dow started the day up 200 then fell back into negative territory before rallying. the dow is up 143 points the nasdaq was off 10. the labor department reported 391,000 new unemployment claims being filed last week. that might sound like a lot but it's actually 37,000 fewer than the previous week. and the lowest amount since april. however it still wasn't enough to budge the unemployment rate from 9.1%. >>> economists are also taking a wait and see approach before declaring this the start of a trend. >>> hewlett packered ceo is being the well compensated before he leaves office. the during his 11 month tenure hp lost about $40 billion. the new ceo meg whitman gets $1 a year in salary plus stock objection, hp chairs and a target bonus of almost $2 million. >>> supervisors want to crack down on problem parking lots in the city, the issue is violence in popular night life neighborhoods like north beach. people looking for trouble are drawn to the crowds and excitement especially on the weekend. >> if they have

comedian jay leno opened the fund raising concert and he had the crowd in stitches.d a line up of stars for the benefit. the evening started with a cocktail party as donors and staff celebrated with champane. >> we were limited with space. this will allow us to serve the children. >> thank you. >> who do you want to say thank you to? >> to my doctor. >> reporter: the new 183 bed children's hospital is now under construction in san francisco's mission day neighborhood. along with a new women's hospital and cancer center. >> we still have about $220 million to raise. it's a lot of money. on the other hand this is incredibly generous community and people are willing to invest in the future of the children and really in the future of this city. >>> a city that's getting star power tonight to help raise the needed funds. >> i like hearing the people laugh and they say, we raised all this money. so it works out okay. >>> after leno grammy award winning singer alanis morisett took the stage. today's event raised $5 million for the hospital. jana katsuyama, ktvu channel 2 ne

. >> >> jay leno is getting over it marked an escalation was reported catalina new-line the bradley cooper a restaurant in new york boi wha. will add more entertainment headlines in the next hour >> the news bart phone is on the market >> the highly anticipated droid phone is here it is on the market this is a good droid and bionic it is made by motorola has a large dutch green is the first dual processor board gp processor this is the first is smart phone on the market i was blown away how fast the speed at was like surfing up on a laptop would this was a different experience if you want fast internet on a phone call look at the bionic that droid bionic is $300 at verizon and a two year contract when besides the high speed and you can store 48 some on the phone raba. it might merit the and droid phone at the $300 replacement do not wait three or four months and they dropped to $250 a whopper if you wait till the holidays you may get a better deal wa. >> not sure if you went to the movies and contagion everyone went to that one it made at 23.1 million coming in second was the helm it is st

rights, the hpv vaccine and the debt ceiling as she made her debut on "the tonight show request jay lenothe butt of his jokes, a point he made as he thanked her for being a good sport. leno went light on the jokes with her and heavy on where she stands on issues. >>> for the latest political news you know where to go. cnnpolitics.com. >>> okay. much more of the newsroom straight ahead. don lemon is here. finally. it's been a long time since we have been here face to face to talk about what's coming up. >> i walked into the building. i was like, wow. i think over a month i haven't been in the studio and on the road. >> glad you're back. >> hey, fred, listen. we'll be talking about the story. much reported. you saw the protests today and people in support of troy davis. his scheduled execution is for wednesday. his case got a lot of attention. you know, some say he's innocent. i will be talking to his sister and the pastor who turned him in to police. i have a call out to a former prosecutor, fred, who says there was physical evidence, there was physical evidence in the case to convict him

and gas prices may be high but according to jay leno that is a good thing. >> according to

here is jay leno. >> fox news confirmed the new jersey governor chris christie will not seek the g.o.ptrenton, new jersey? the fast cars? the women? life style? yes! >> greta: that is your last call. before we go i want to tell but greta wire alerm system. it will send you breaking news whenever you are. i will send you words directly so you'll get breaking news fast and it's free. to sign up just got to the righthand side of greta wire. you'll find the greta wire poll. you need to enter your e mail address and will be on the greta wire alert system. go there and vote in the poll i just put up today. thanks for joining us tonight. make sure gou to gretawire.com and let us know your thoughts owe hily factor is next. good night from washington, d.c.. ayanet. both fnc, fbn, we're there. count on it. captioned by closed captioning services, inc

comedian jay leno has the video. sort of. here's your punch line. >> when perry answered questions about social security, you know, i guess he knows how to drum up a crowd. see, when you don't have an answer, you try to get the crowd pumped up. take a look at what he did. >> can you explain specifically how 50 separate social security systems are supposed to work? >> let me just say first for those people on social security today, for those people that are approaching social security, they don't have anything in the world to worry about. we have made a solemn oath to the people in this country. >>> so, you're on facebook and all of a sudden you notice someone has defriended you. you're devastated, right? well, a new feature of the site can help you find out who removed you, but surprise surprise, there's some controversy. but first, it's time for our quote of the day. >>> great bumper sticker, debbie. that's the quote, great bumper sticker, debbie, sarcastically said to the cham of the democratic national chairwoman. that's c

it's jay leno. >> i'm brushing my teeth. >> i'll be right now. >> is this the suit you will be wearing tonight? >> no, i thought i would wear this, jay. >> laura: for his self depend rating -- for his self deprecating humor, mr. cheney is a patriot. >> visit the website bolder, fresher.com for info on the show dates. also, don't miss the special promo for premium members. if you sign up, you get a free factor pen, plus lots of behind the scenes access to the show. while you're at it, silly, please pick up my new book, you'll die laughing. i hope not die, but you'll laugh of the "i thee i zing," it's available on laura ingraham.com. bill will be back in the no spin zone tomorrow night. again, thanks for watching us. i'm laura ingraham and please remember, the spin stops right here because we are always looking out for you. >> hey, it's wednesday, september 7th. it's the first day of school for a lot of kids at least here on the east coast. i'm gretchen carlson. thanks for sharing your time. details emerging about president obama's new plan to create jobs, the price tag $300 billion so i

charlie sheen was on jay leno last night singing a very different song. basically apologizing. to what he has to say now. >> i realized i was pretty much losing. in. i would have fired my ass, too. yeah, i didn't really believe i had tiger blood or adonis dna. these were just jokes. no, i'm single and having fun and i'm, pretty much. >> not too much fun. >> not too much fun. i'm in work mode. >> the goddesses are gone. he is in work mode, what do you thing it all means, rob? >> he needs some work. the tour was a bomb. it was a disaster. looking to get back in good graces. the obligatory, like my bad i was just joking around. now "two and a half men" will move on with ashton kutcher without him. i think he realized the whole thing was horribly stupid. >> ladies who are willing to gamble. he is single. >> you have a good time with that, ladies. real stable man, help you out, raise the kids. apparently, brad pitt, jennifer aniston in the news. brad opening up about the relationship. interesting he says i wasn't living an interesting life while he was married to jennifer aniston. h

i want you to listen to something that michele bachmann said on jay leno's show. >> well, that wholey thing. i don't get that. >> well, see, i think -- when i heard that, i really thought it was like a kind of a midlife crisis line. pray away the gray. that's what i thought it was. >> two gay people want to get married, that's their business. that doesn't concern us. i mean, why is that even an issue? >> well because the family is foundational and marriage between a man and a woman has been what the law has been for years and years. >> i tried it myself. it works great for me. >> see, there you go. >> but, i mean, you know -- >> dan, when she tried to make a joke about pray away the gray, you know, as a midlife crisis, it's clear that one of her writers told her to try to on this show anyway get away from that kind of rhetoric if you can. >> michele bachmann's been ducking the question about gay marriage in every mainstream appearance that she makes. she still speaks in dog whistles. what we're going to see from the republican right is what happened with race on the republican right.

is going to run for the governorship for the state of california and you get on television with jay lenoscover, what was my friend's name? arnold schwarzenegger. not a bad deal. >> i know. but you know, i don't see how he recovers. it's going to be interesting how he recovers from the divorce and the illegitimate child. women don't like him because of what he did, and guys are having a tough time with him because he did it with the maid and she wasn't that good- looking. >> that's not true, phil. two things. she was attractive at the time. you're seeing her vintage a long time after the incident actually occurred, 12, 13, 14 years. and people change in that period of time. secondly, you better understand, he is not trying to win any popularity contests. he is doing exactly what he always does, translate his stardom into money. that book and the movie that's going to be made from that book will bring him hundreds of thousands of dollars. that guy is worth probably half a billion dollars already. he is going to give the wife in the settlement probably half of that. he will replace it with

here is jay leno. >> and that satellite supposed to hit the earth today?y admit they have no idea where this six-ton satellite is. they don't know. in case it did hit in the united states the obama administration is ready to blame president bush. but don't worry. we'll have that. we'll have that story. we will have that story. >> and now that is your last call. lights are blinking and we're clogsing down shop. thanks for being with us tonight. i'm going to put an open thread on greta fbn. clothing optional. captioned by closed captioning services, inc

it's jay leno. >> i'm brushing my teeth. >> i'll be right now. >> is this the suit you will be wearing? >> no, i thought i would wear this, jay. >> laura: for his self depend rating -- for his self deprecating humor, mr. cheney is a patriot. >> visit the website bolder, fresher.com for info on the show dates. also, don't miss the special promo for premium members. if you sign up, you get a free factor pen, plus lots of behind the scenes access to the show. while you're at it, silly, please pick up my new book, you'll die laughing. i hope not die,