june 20th, 1968, muppet creator jim henson-- we all know jim henson? while giving draft physicals as an army medic, which he was, is discharged from the service for using kermit to make a man cough. [ laughter ] bag boy calendar. for supermarket. why not? if you've got a joke, you've got a bag boy calendar. august ninth, 1983, safeway bag boy emilio bacardi revolutionizes blind dating, when he offers his blind date a choice of paper or plastic. [ laughter ] i have one more, here. the fred de cordova calendar. [ applause ] january first, 1937. fred finally remembers to stop dating his checks b.c. and start using a.d. [ laughter ] and one more entry here. september second, 1986. an enraged de cordova really tells johnny off "great show," but leaves off the sir. remember that? [ laughter ] never have. bette davis will be out in just a moment, [ music ] [ applause ] >> okay. now, my next guest is a very talented actor and comedian. on both "second city tv," nbc's "saturday night live," his movies include "the three amigos," and "inner space." this is his f