and now, not only that, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: hi, i'm jimmy.'m the host short. thank you for watching. thanks to all of you for coming. i don't mean to silence you but we have a lot to get to. first i have an important medical announcement for those of you who wear skinny jeans. doctors are warning that skinny jeans are potentially hazardous to your health. that's right, score another win for yoga pants. according to a case study, if you spend a lot of time in a squatting position wearing skinny jeans, can lead to serious nerve damage in your lower legs. all right. so don't spend a lot of time in a squatting position. who spends a lot of time in a squatting position? maybe if you're a catcher on a major league baseball team. they get a uniform to wear, they're not in skinny jeans. the report cites the story of a 35-year-old woman in skinny jeans who wound up lying motionless on the pavement, unable to get up, after helping a relative move. see, to see the lesson there is, don't help a relative move. right? here's the thing, we're sending a mixe

man, woman, both holding hands. >> jimmy: ring. >> bride. >> jimmy: eggplant. >> taco. >> jimmy: baby>> family. >> jimmy: beer. beer, beer, beer. >> angry face. >> jimmy: beer, beer, banter, boobs. >> broken heart. angry face. >> jimmy: scared face. >> butcher's knife. >> jimmy: two hands up. >> butcher's knife, butcher's knife, big. >> jimmy: santa claus? baby chick? >> butcher's knife. >> jimmy: headstone, ghost. >> coop emoji skull. >> jimmy: and -- scene. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: thank you very much, brie. i'll see you. we'll be right back with the belly flop competition so stick around! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ real fruit in silky smooth dove dark chocolate. dove fruit. choose a pleasure less ordinary. don't wake him. do it. [crunch] huh [laughing] looking good frank. looking good. ♪ong: rachel platten "fight song" two million, four hundred thirty-four thousand, three hundred eleven people in this city. and only one me. ♪ i'll take those odds. ♪ be unstoppable. the all-new 2015 ford edge. is thno, it's, uh, breyers gelato indulgences. you really wouldn't like it. it's

i think i can help you out, johnny. >> jimmy: jimmy.vy, how did you hurt yourself? this is terrible. >> oh, i know. it's not good. it's not good. i was whacking off to old episodes of "mary tyler moore." [ laughter ] >> jimmy: no, no, no, no, no, no, chevy. don't tell people that. a lot of young kids watch this show. >> oh, i didn't see any. >> jimmy: they're watching at home. >> okay, i meant to say, ariana grande videos. >> jimmy: no, no, no, no, no. chevy that's not the point. the point is not that. that's not the point. never mind. >> look, i hurt it, and that at least, i didn't hurt this one. >> jimmy: no, no, don't. that's not -- chevy, stop! [ laughter ] just stop. i was wondering if you'd like to do a duet with me. >> i'd love to. >> jimmy: oh that would be fantastic. >> what do you play, violin? [ cheers and applause ] we're playing piano. >> oh, yeah. now we're talking, yeah. >> jimmy: one, two, and here we go. >> one, two -- >> jimmy: this is great. okay, here. perfect. this is good. where is some walking music? thank you. ♪

i'm your host, jimmy fallon.'m proud to announce that for the second year in a row, i took home the espy award for the most crying while on the treadmill. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] second year in a row. that's right, hundreds of athletes traveled to los angeles last night to attend this year's espy awards and to say hi to their old flame kim kardashian. [ laughter ] it's just a nice thing every year to do. let's get to some political news here. donald trump met with fellow gop candidate ted cruz yesterday and trump admitted that he had no idea why they were meeting. [ laughter ] got even weirder when someone asked how they arranged the meeting and trump said, "craigslist." [ laughter ] trump's been very busy since announcing he's running for president. in fact, earlier this week, he gave an interview with cnn at a a winery he owns in virginia. turns out trump's winery makes two different kinds of wine. white wine and not white wine. [ laughter and applause ] a little trivia. >> steve: i guess. >> jimmy

i'm not an idiot. >> jimmy: yeah, all right. >> i'm not an idiot, jimmy. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: i knowt, why don't you start it off? and press the button when you're ready. >> and i say it immediately? okay. >> jimmy: yeah. [ beeping ] [ laughter ] >> husband number two. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] sorry ben! i didn't mean it. i didn't mean it. >> jimmy: you would marry fabio? >> yes, right? >> jimmy: he's a good looking dude. yeah. all right, here we go. [ beeping ] robot rastafarian. [ laughter and applause ] >> i just, i didn't -- >> jimmy: yeah. i was like, i didn't know what it was. i'm like, what is that? >> all right, ready? [ beeping ] feeling really good about this. oh. >> jimmy: hey. [ laughter ] >> husband number three! [ laughter ] >> jimmy: those are some bad high school photos. that mustache. that took me a year to grow that mustache. >> that is -- i know exactly how soft and baby fine that is. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: that's a wispy mustache. that's awful. that's a high school photo. why would i grow a mustache? >> thank god you did. >> jimmy: oh my goodness. >> w

>> number one, jimmy fallon. >> jimmy: here we go.ah, here we go. >> i'll be good cop then. how are you? [ laughter ] >> jimmy: great, thanks for asking. >> don't be nervous, this'll be over really, really quick. >> jimmy: this seems really fun. >> yeah, yeah. >> just gonna have a quick chat. >> jimmy: well, i got my head stuck in a fence, and my grandma used mayonnaise to squeeze me out of it. [ laughter ] >> what was your grandma's name. >> jimmy: my grandma's name was gloria. >> mother or father's mom? >> jimmy: my mothers mom. >> how old were you? >> jimmy: i was probably -- -- ten? >> so your your head in a fence this big? >> jimmy: yeah, yeah. my head's not that big. >> yeah. families get along? >> jimmy: yeah. >> is there turmoil? >> jimmy: no turmoil. >> what are you hiding, fallon? >> jimmy: no turmoil. no turmoil at all. >> what brand was the mayo? what brand was the mayo? what brand was the mayo? >> jimmy: what? [ laughter ] sorry. >> why did you put your head in there in the first place? >> jimmy: i was a curious child. >>

gambling spa. >> jimmy, don't. >> jimmy: i don't look at it?. [ laughter ] yeah, hit me. yo, yo. hit me with the card. >> jimmy: yeah? >> hit me with the card. >> jimmy: here you go, man. it's all for you, man. >> okay. >> jimmy: there you go. >> thank you so much. [ laughter ] it's so great to be here on your show. i always have such a good -- ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: did that hurt? sting a little bit? >> i'm trying to explain. people have asked me, what does it feel like to get hit. right? and i never really know how to explain it. but i really don't know how to explain how that feels. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: all right. here we go. >> okay. >> jimmy: whoever wins this, wins the whole thing. >> there's you. >> jimmy: this is bragging rights. oh my god. >> what? >> jimmy: this is so fun, man. this is great. it's so weird. >> i love it man. >> jimmy: okay. the queen of hearts. >> what's up with this? what's going on? >> jimmy: are you okay? >> are you okay? alright, man. what's wrong with your hand, man? not that one. not that one. tha

>> jimmy: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight -- jada pinkett smith. from "terminator: genisys," jai courtney. "this week in unnecessary censorship." and music from nate ruess. with cleto and the cletones. and now, moving on, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: hi, everyone. i'm jimmy, i'm the host of the show. thank you for watching. thanks for coming. i'm very glad you did. it would be embarrassing if you hadn't. let's jump right into it. as we have a lot to get to. we had a major decision from the supreme court today. do you guys obamacare about that or not? [ cheers and applause ] the supreme court ruled in a 6-3 decision to preserve the affordable care act, more commonly known as obamacare, which means we can do anything we want. we could drink, we could smoke, we could jump mini bikes off of bridges, we could play chainsaw tag if we want to. we get hurt? it's not our problem, it's ameri america's problem. [ cheers and applause ] obama was very happy, he try tum fantly -- triumphantly declared that the affordable care act is h

>> jimmy: all right.othing's happened. [ laughter and applause ] we have a great show, everybody. give it up for the roots, right there! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: we had a great week so far, there's more ahead. tomorrow night the hilarious bill hader will be here from "trainwreck." >> steve: yeah. come on. [ cheers and applause ] billy. >> jimmy: then on friday, we have ryan seacrest, trevor noah and tig notaro! that's a big show. [ cheers and applause ] and of course, thank you notes. don't want to miss that on friday. but first we have a fantastic show tonight. she's so funny. she's so talented. we love her. i loved, loved, loved this movie, "trainwreck." fantastic. our pal amy schumer in the house. [ cheers and applause ] >> steve: come on! come on! >> jimmy: ooh la la. like two covers. [ cheers ] there's eight covers on this cover. >> steve: wow. >> jimmy: the whole magazine is covers. >> steve: really? >> jimmy: yeah, the whole magazine. it's 400 covers. >> steve: cover bands, cover magazin

these are the things you learn, jimmy. >> jimmy: fascinating.e flight attendant" is in select theaters and available on demand. mark feuerstein, everybody. and we shall return with music from robert delong. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ on his quest, jack searched the globe for a flavorful spice coveted by kings and sultans. at last, he found it. exotic black pepper. jack knew what he had to do. trade his most beloved possession. and that's how far jack went to bring you the black pepper cheeseburger. black pepper cheese and peppercorn mayo. the black pepper cheeseburger. taste it before it's gone. >> jimmy: i'm so tired i'm going to sit in the audience. i would like to thank andre iguodala, chris tucker, mark feuerstein and apologize to matt damon, we ran out of time. "nightline" is coming up next, but first, his album is called "in the cards." here with the song "don't wait up" robert delong. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ ♪ waiting on the phone to ring and wake us up again lost inside a dream with halls that never seem to end ♪ ♪ falling from the ce

are you excited, jimmy? >> jimmy: sure.ows. >> then what's up with that computer on your desk? >> jimmy: that's nothing. i just -- >> ju -- ju -- ju-- just what, jimmy? sounds like someone is being a a [ bleep ] liar. i can help with that. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: hey! clippy, is that a baseball bat? >> it's tool for teaching you a a little respect. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: all right, fine, fine. i'll get windows 10, okay? >> with microsoft office? >> jimmy: yes, with microsoft office. >> that's what i thought. see you around, bitch! [ cheers and applause ] >> steve: rude! that's rude. >> jimmy: what the heck just happened? >> steve: wow! that is rude. clippy. >> jimmy: i hate that clippy. [ laughter ] >> steve: clip him. >> jimmy: and finally, a recent study shows that standing at work for long periods of time is bad for you. after earlier research indicated that sitting too long at work is bad for you. so really, the only thing we know is work is bad for you. [ cheers and applause ] we have a great show. give it up

>> jimmy: yeah. [ laughter ] ♪ jimmy cracked corn >> jimmy: david spade is here, you guys!d applause ] all right. plus, she stars in the new netflix original series "between," the lovely jennette mccurdy is stopping by. [ cheers and applause ] we love jennette. >> steve: come on. "icarly." that's my pal, my "icarly" buddy. and we got great music from a$ap rocky right now! [ cheers and applause ] guys, it's time for "tonight show" hashtags. here we go. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: you guys are on twitter? is anyone out there on twitter? [ cheers and applause ] it's fun. we use twitter on our show every single week. so if you watch our show and you want to play along with out game here, i send out -- every wednesday i send out a hashtag. we ask you guys to tweet out things based on that topic. but since "jurassic world" is coming out tomorrow, i went on twitter and started a hashtag called "dino raps." [ light laughter ] yeah. i asked you guys to tweet out a a funny rap lyric about dinosaurs. we got thousands of tweets. within 30 minutes it was a a trending topic in th

>> jimmy: yeah.loga. she says, "i used to think that song from "grease" went ♪ you better shave bob cause i need a pen ♪ why would you need a pen for? you better to save bob? [ laughter ] >> steve: apparently the pen is made of bob's hair? >> jimmy: i don't know, no. >> steve: is bob a bird and your going to make a quill pen? >> jimmy: that's deep. that's dark. >> steve: you better shave bob. 8444. >> jimmy: this on is from @bjvcampbell. he says, "my wife thinks the lyrics to "tubthumping" are, ♪ i get knocked down by an elephant ♪ which could happen. there you have it. those are our tonight show hashtags. we play it every week. [ cheers and applause ] check out more of our favorites go to tonightshow.com/hashtags. stick around, we'll be right back with more of "the tonight show," ladies and gentlemen! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ why are all these people so asleep, yet i'm so awake? did you know your brain has two systems? one helps keep you awake- the other helps you sleep. science suggests when you h

ready for our fun show. >> we love you, jimmy. >> jimmy: i love you too. you so much for being here. here is what everyone is talking about. of course donald trump announced that he is running for president this week. and get this, according to a a new analysis, trump's speech on tuesday was actually written at a seventh grade level. [ laughter ] which i guess explains his 20 minute rant on why homework sucks. [ laughter ] in an interview yesterday, donald trump called jeb bush a a reluctant warrior and said he thinks jeb is an unhappy person. [ light laughter ] which is interesting coming from a guy who always looks like he just ate a lemon. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] oh, this wasn't good here. red sox third baseman, pablo sandoval, was forced to sit out last night after he was caught liking pictures of women on instagram during the game. [ laughter ] yeah, the team actually benched him. even worse, when he got home his girlfriend couched him. [ laughter ] you're not sleeping here, buddy. yeah. [ applause ] speaking of sports, golf's u.s. open s

[ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: i'm jimmy, i'm the host short. thank you for watching.hank you for coming. wow. i'm glad you're here. you know what would be a fun thing to do from now on? somebody write this down. the tickets to see this show in hollywood are free. which i will say really cuts down on people asking for refunds after the show. so we don't charge money for people to get in here. you know what would be nice? if everyone brought me a sandwich. in order to get in you have to bring me a sandwich. every night i'll have 150 sandwiches. i pick the ones i like, i give the rest to you, guillermo, wouldn't that be good? >> guillermo: that would be good, we should do that. >> jimmy: imagine the variety. we'd get sub sandwiches, meatball, blt every once in a while. welcome to our salute to texas. [ cheers and applause ] not that this has anything to do with it but donald trump is in texas, is that why you left? as i'm sure you've heard, because he's been yelling about it nonstop, donald trump's running for president. he's currently polling hair and shoulders above th

couch. >> cup. >> jimmy: chair. >> red. >> jimmy: grass. >> green. >> jimmy: towel. >> tie. >> jimmy:>> jimmy: bat. >> pen. >> jimmy: glove. >> drum. >> jimmy: hat. >> keyboard. >> jimmy: scarf. [ laughter ] [ sad tuba ] >> you're a master. as soon i get. >> jimmy: you have got to come back more often. like every week. it would be so fun. i don't know what to do here. [ light laughter ] >> i'm glad. i'm glad. >> jimmy: yeah, glad. all right, perfect. yeah. >> jimmy: this is so great. why, don't you come on all the time? >> i will. i'll just sit here like this. all the time. >> jimmy: this is great. no, we love it. okay, good. ready? you can put that on your face. it's so beautiful. yeah. >> oh, wait. i know. but we have to concentrate. >> jimmy: okay. here we go. ready? concentrate. [ light laughter ] sorry. sorry. sorry. when you say it with that tape -- it comes off mean. i got to say. all right. do you want to start or me start? >> i'm starting. >> jimmy: okay, ready? >> okay. floor. >> jimmy: gravy. >> light. >> jimmy: turkey. >> tv. >> jimmy: knife. >> your shirt. >> jimmy: rug.

not yet. >> jimmy: oh. >> i've been sick. >> jimmy: yeah.ink you will start working on it? >> i'm thinking easily within the next couple of months. >> jimmy: right. so you're taking this pretty seriously. >> no, no, i really am. i was hugely, hugely flattered that i got asked to do it. >> jimmy: yeah. >> that's such a dream job. statement it's like kind of hard because you know somewhere you're on a short list of people that are doing comedy on the network it's airing on. >> jimmy: on fox, yeah. >> yeah. so i was like, i'm on fox. so probably between me and mo "the simpsons." [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> i still beat out mo, that's good. >> jimmy: mo would be good, yeah. i like that we've moved on from the plastic bubble and we're now trying to have a regular conversation. >> we're just doing this. you know, the thing about airplane food, jimmy. it's terrible! >> jimmy: i really feel like we're in that john travolta movie right now. [ cheers and applause ] by the way, i don't know if we should call it a -- >> you can take them off

>> jimmy: they bring it right down to earth. >> yeah, they do. >> jimmy: absolutely, yeah. >> jimmy:." that's an actor right there! >> a departure. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: absolutely, yeah. >> a swill departure! yes. >> jimmy: but god, every time you come on -- do you mind that i bring up "taxi" every single time? >> no, i love "taxi." >> jimmy: it's my favorite -- >> oh my god, that was five years. the greatest time. >> jimmy: oh my god, that was an important time to me. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: the best cast. no, i loved it. everybody, everybody on the show! >> jimmy: the best writing. >> oh my god, it was great. >> jimmy: and it was live in front an audience, right? >> well, it was in front of an audience on a friday night. we would work all week, you know, you'd go monday through friday, rehearse it. and then on friday night at 7:00, we had the audience -- like this size audience, and we did it with three cameras. it was, like, they really -- it was a ball. it was a blast. it was a part that i really wanted, you know. i didn't -- i didn't -- you know, i wasn't -- i hadn't

>> jigsaw puzzles, jimmy, yeah. >> jimmy: really?urprised they weren't complaining about you. you were more of a security threat. >> there's a sociopath in 101. >> jimmy: putting cats together next door. >> yeah, we knew he would kill somebody eventually. yeah. i went on a retail binge too. i miss my family. i bought a record player, and speakers, and by the time i was there i ended up buying 200 albums, vinyl albums while i was in miami. >> jimmy: why? >> i could stay inside and listen to them. >> jimmy: yeah. >> in my underwear. while doing puzzles. >> jimmy: i have to show you this phone i have. it has all these songs on it. it weighs almost nothing. you can carry it around in your pants. did you leave the records in miami? >> no, i drove back. it was an excuse to drive across country, basically, i'm not going to mail my records. >> jimmy: so after not seeing your family for months, you said it's going to be another three days because i have to have my records with me. >> that's exactly right. i have so much stuff. >> jimmy: are y

and now, here's jimmy kimmel! [cheers and applause] >> jimmy: very happy you're here. we have a show for you tonight that is attractive and has a great personality, too. jon hamm is here. he plays a new character in the new movie minions, which is animated which is good because we don't have to look at his hideous face. and also from "masters of sex," lizzy caplan, and sheila e is sitting in with the cletones. you have known cleto for years, is that right? >> yeah, like 15 years or so, but i think we're related. >> jimmy: your last names are almost exactly the same. i know i'm pronouncing it badly. >> right. my grandfather, we were, he changed it in 1937. >> jimmy: he was trying to convince you that you weren't related because he wanted to have sexual relations. [cheers and applause] >> jimmy: you might have to write another book. so the great sheila e is sitting in with cleto. [ applause ] u.s. national soccer team, our soccer team beat colombia last night, 2-0. they're advancing now to the quarter finals of the women's world cup. the american team will travel to otta

>> jimmy: yeah.you don't in the lounge they go opposite back to back. don't they? yeah. that's what i'm saying. if they're back to back how would you touch my toe at all? >> steve: are they all? they're not all back to back are they? >> jimmy: unless i'm like this. >> steve: i'm saying there's a a guy on a chair. the only way it's possible. >> jimmy: yeah, yeah, barely touch my --. >> steve: bouncing in the chair was in front of the dude. >> jimmy: but you wouldn't sit like that. >> steve: if my toe got in there i would. maybe i'm a weird beard. and i have to sit like this. >> jimmy: no, say you sit like that. but you're there, sit up, but i'm behind you, yeah? >> steve: okay. okay, you get behind me. oh, that's not your toe. >> jimmy: it's not my toe. [ cheers and applause ] >> steve: was that a roll of dimes? [ laughter ] >> jimmy: which toe did you think it was? [ laughter ] >> steve: big toe. >> jimmy: thank you, baby. yeah, you're the best man. >> steve: i got your back. [ laughter ] >> steve: t

>> jimmy: there's more. >> steve: what? >> jimmy: yeah. tonight, two of the other greatest basketball players on the planet. [ laughter ] >> steve: i think you've got the wrong card. >> jimmy: am i reading the wrong card? no, they are two of the greatest basketball players on the planet, they're giving us a a world premier of the trailer for the big new comedy movie. super funny movie called "sisters." tina fey and amy poehler are in the house. [ cheers and applause ] >> steve: what? who? >> jimmy: that's both of them. >> steve: both of them? tina and amy? and lebron? >> jimmy: three nba legends. >> steve: well, that must be it. >> jimmy: three nba legends are in the house. i can't wait. and the movie looks great. the movie is written by paula pell by the way. and comedy fans know paula pell writes the goods. but, then we have what could be the song of the summer on tonight. yeah. [ cheers and applause ] this could be the song of the summer. everybody is singing this song. this is -- the song is called "cheerleader." this is omi is here to

"jimmy kimmel live." >> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live." tonight -- bill hader -- from "dope," shameik moore -- and music from philip selway. with cleto and the cletones. and now, you better believe it, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: hi everyone! very nice. thank you. i'm jimmy, i'm the host of the show. thank you for watching. thanks for coming. very nice. i do appreciate it. i know a lot of you are on vacation. did you get a chance to watch the game last night in the basketball game? on abc last night the golden state warriors beat the cleveland cavaliers to win their first nba for 40 years. things were calm in oakland, no one did anything crazy, which was good. the governor of california has asked us not to set our towns on fire because of the drought and we listened to him. andre iguodala of the warriors was named the finals mvp which is great news for everyone except gate who has to engrave that name on a trophy. it was such an exciting series. did you know this was the most-watched finals since michael jordan

thank you, jimmy. >> jimmy: no problem. >> testing.funk" by mark ronson featuring chris pratt. ♪ ♪ upset it's ice cold ain't feel bad but it's quite old this one but them ♪ ♪ drunk squirrels drunk squirrels that love ice cream crying while you ♪ ♪ snuggling up with the kiddies bugs on my cobbler bone got to kiss an elf named smitty ♪ ♪ too hot old man and a tired man too hot ♪ ♪ not spam whack a bag loose with a frying pan too hot ♪ ♪ jock jam my maiden name is o'houlihan i'm too hot ♪ ♪ john ham molasses in my tummy break it down got to go spit into a tuba ♪ ♪ got to go spit into a tuba got to go spit into a tuba ♪ ♪ got drunk with a ballerina because i got drunk with a ballerina ♪ ♪ because i got drunk with a ballerina ♪ ♪ drippin' with sweat we're in the funk christmas eve let's eat squash ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: that was great. amazing right there. >> thank you. thanks, guys. >> jimmy: set a high bar. set a high bar right there. now, my first song will be "stay with me" by sam smith. ♪ ♪ this is true i got nude in a m

all right jimmy, chug it. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: it's just awful. [ grunts ] >> jimmy: shuta gravy. [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: this is the last time we're playing drinko, ladies and gentlemen, on this show. [ laughter ] congratulations to paul rudd, the winner. [ cheers ] "ant man" is in theaters this friday, everybody. go see it. jon glaser joins us after the break. stick around, everybody! ♪ the signs are everywhere. the lincoln summer invitation is on. get exceptional offers on the compact utility mkc, mkz sedan... the iconic navigator. and get a first look at the entirely new 2016 mid-size utility lincoln mkx. lease the 2015 mkc for $369 a month with $0 down, $0 first month's payment and $0 cash due at signing. ♪ expected wait time: 55 minutes. your call is important to us. thank you for your patience. waiter! vo: in the nation, we know how it feels when you aren't treated like a priority. we do things differently. we'll take care of it. vo: we put members first... join the nation. thank you. ♪ nationwide is on your side ♪ [music] jackie's heart attack didn't come with

>> jimmy: what?elling you guys, the second season of "true detective" is just too weird. [ laughter ] i have a question. can that guy run for president? [ cheers and applause ] i want that guy to run for president. i love him. we have a great show. give it up for the roots, everybody! ♪ ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: that's unbelievable. what a treat, that is legendary blues musician and six-time grammy award winner buddy guy sitting in with the roots! [ cheers and applause ] >> thank you. >> jimmy: buddy guy right there! oh, my goodness! here's his new album here, "born to eat guitars," and -- no, i'm sorry. "born to play guitars." i apologize. it's out this friday. you can catch him on tour through september. i mean, he's a legend. he's one of the greatest guitarists of all time. i'm just so happy that you're here. [ cheers and applause ] >> thank you. >> jimmy: you're like, yeah, yeah, get on with it, buddy. i've heard it before, yeah. just let me play. i just want to play. we love you, man

>> jimmy: hey.me of you might know that july is "national ice cream month." [ cheers ] we're actually lucky enough to have our own ice cream flavor. here it is right here, ben & jerry's "the tonight dough." [ cheers and applause ] that's right. proceeds go to char -- guys, guys, what is that? sorry. sorry, what is that? that's -- for something we're doing later. anyways, ignore that. anyway, "tonight dough" is amazing. my proceeds go to charity. it's really good. it has great flavors in it. it's really amazing stuff. [ laughter ] guys. okay, stop. we don't need that smoke. why is all that smoke -- it's for another -- what's going on, guys? i can't -- i can't see what's going on. guys? [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ ben & jerry's "tonight dough" tastes so good ♪ ♪ caramel and chocolate ice cream and two different types of cookie dough ♪ ♪ chocolate chip cookie dough peanut butter cookie dough ♪ ♪ don't forget the cookie swirl ♪ [ cheers ] ♪ we love "tonight dough" "tonight dough" ♪ ♪ "tonight dough" "to

these are the things you learn, jimmy. >> jimmy: fascinating.ale flight attendant" is in select theaters and available on demand. mark feuerstein, everybody. and we shall return with music from robert delong. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: i'm so tired i'm going to sit in the audience. i would like to thank andre iguodala, chris tucker, mark feuerstein and apologize to matt damon, we ran out of time. "nightline" is coming up next, but first, his album is called "in the cards." here with the song "don't wait up" robert delong. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ ♪ waiting on the phone to ring and wake us up again lost inside a dream with halls that never seem to end ♪ ♪ falling from the ceiling i keep crawling on the floor can't ignore the feeling this has happened all before ♪ ♪ i stumble out of my home i'm looking out every now and then if i'm leaving my home i don't know when i'll be ♪ ♪ back again so don't you wait up on me i'm leaving with the light ♪ ♪ don't wait up on me i've got a restless mind trying to pull ahead i'm always chasing time ♪

>> thank you, jimmy.interview may be monitored or recorded for quality assurance purposes. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: yes, i know it's being monitored and recorded. this is a tv show. >> para espaÑol, marque cinco. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: no. no spanish. no spanish, please, thank you. >> i have your name as, jimmy fallon. is this correct? [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: yes. >> say "yes" or "no." [ laughter ] >> jimmy: yes! >> i'm sorry, i didn't get that. please say "yes" or "no." >> jimmy: yes! >> i'm sorry. i'm having a little trouble understanding you. let me connect you with a a representative. >> jimmy: wait, no, you are a a representative. ♪ [ laughter ] alan? am i on real life hold? is that what's happening? alan, will you please stop dancing to your hold music. cause it's not -- >> thank you for waiting. your satisfaction is important to us. hello? hello? >> jimmy: oh, great! alan -- >> your estimated wait time is 48 minutes. >> jimmy: no i don't -- i don't have time for this. please hang up the intervie

>> jimmy: yeah, yeah, do it again. >> if you can make jimmy laugh, you can make anybody laugh. >> jimmy ready? >> if you can make jimmy laugh, you can make anyone laugh. ♪ [ laughter and applause ] >> jimmy: oh, i forgot to load my gun. [ laughter ] i'm like 006, i'm your buddy. >> i forgot my gun. >> jimmy: i am holding but i forgot it. i'm like your surfer buddy. we'll talk after the show. >> i could see this going somewhere. >> jimmy: i want to show a clip 'cause this is a really great movie called "infinitely polar bear" which incidentally is one of the daughters is describing her dad, she's like, "my dad has polar bear." [ audience aws ] it is more than that, it is laughs and fun and touching as well, though. and zoe saldana. >> amazing. >> jimmy: i mean, awesome. >> zoe saldana is amazing. >> jimmy: she's fantastic. >> she plays my wife. >> jimmy: we have a clip, mark ruffalo, "infinitely polar bear." >> i play her husband. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: take a look. >> that is where your great grandmother, gaga grew up. >> in that whole house? >> the whole thing, it's the grandest house

the flag, the flag. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy fallon! jimmy fallon! jimmy fallon!can't stop turning. i can't stop turning in circles. okay, i need help. i can't stop turning in circles. i need some -- >> i got it. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: i'm going to throw up. [ talking over each other ] >> all right, great. >> jimmy: thank you for bringing that. >> yeah. >> jimmy: that's an entrance, right there. >> i got you one of those. >> jimmy: jamie foxx, ladies and gentlemen. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ funky duck. >> jimmy: that's the way to make an entrance. thank you for coming back to see us. >> how great is this, man? good to see you guys. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: look at that. isn't that cool? [ cheers and applause ] doesn't that look great? >> it looks absolutely amazing. >> jimmy: we have a lot to get to. i've a lot to ask you about and talk to you about. quickly, you just saw meredith vieira. >> i did. you know what, and i don't know if you guys know this, but this is all dyed. this is -- it was -- you know, i threw a little dye in this. and i just saw meredi

i'm jimmy.hanks for watching on behalf of the united states of america i'd like to wish our viewers up north of us and those of you who are visiting from there a very happy canada day, today is canada day. [ cheers and applause ] anniversary of canada becoming canada in 1867. canada in case you're not familiar with it is a place where for some reason they call dunking dough nets tim horton's but other than that we're very similar. i do love canada. we owe canada a lot. until canada came along, everybody thought bacon only came in strips. canada proved it can also be round. they're like the christopher columbus of bacon in that way. happy canada day to those of you who deserve it. [ cheers and applause ] this is an international show tonight. the winner of the world's uggi lest dog contest is here tonight. the ugliest dog in the whole world. [ cheers and applause ] her name is quaus moto. every year dozens of dogs travel to petaluma. they've been doing this 27 years. the dogs are scored in a bunc

jimmy: i know.>> yeah! >> have you seen "snapped"? >> jimmy: no, i haven't seen "snapped." is that like wives with knifes? >> oh, they have more than knives. >> jimmy: what is "snapped" about? >> it's a show. i think it's on own where they profile women who have snapped. they're seemingly normal women, schoolteachers, beauty queens, your wife. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: wait a minute, who did my wife kill? >> but it's just seemingly normal women, and then just one day they snap. usually they kill their lover or their lover's lover or -- >> jimmy: and do we root for the ones who snapped? >> no. they're real stories, and it's fascinating. you get some popcorn and some chocolate on a late sunday night, and you can watch five hours of "snapped." >> jimmy: can i tell you, i'm worried about these shows. i can see that they're increasing in popularity. >> everyone knows what the show is. >> jimmy: they're bubbling over. i mean, listen. how can you be comfortable when you see like your wife watching "wives with