beerer's monkey's papers. >> ver are mr. bieber's monkey papers? >> ver are mr. bieber's monkey's papers? >> where are mr. bieber's monkey papers? >> where are mr. monkey -- where are? >> where are mr. peeper's monkey papers. forget it. >> where are mr. bieber's monkey papers? >> where are mr. bieber's monkey papers? >> ver are mr. bieber's monkey papers? >> where are mr. bieber's monkey papers? where are they? >> where are mr. bieber's monkey papers? >> [ speaking foreign language ]. >> where are mr. bieber's monkey papers? i love you justin. >> jimmy: who doesn't. thank you, everybody. we are going the take a break. when we come back we have a special march madness edition of our skype scavenger hunt. plus we have shaquille o'neal and demi lovato. stay right there. go! olive garden's 2 for $25 is ending soon. a 3 course dinner for 2 with new choices like tuscan garlic chicken. grab a friend and go now before it's gone. 2 for $25 ends april 7th. go olive garden! ♪ ♪ ♪ [ male announcer ] get sweep. and get email that keeps your inbox in order, automatically. it's

it's about the monkey.om seth sentry so join us then. our first guest tonight is a ball of british energy who has survived a large number of hardships including trying to have sex with every woman in the country. you can see him on "brand x with russell brand." airs thursday at 11:00 p.m. on fx. please welcome russell brand. how are you? >> i feel very happy, thanks, jimmy. >> jimmy: i want to ask you something. something occurred to me. i look at you and i wonder, does it take you a long -- does it take you a long time to get ready? or do you just roll out of bed? because it could be either way. it would be two hours. it could be five minutes. i really don't know. >> do you mean in this particular instance right now? >> jimmy: in general. >> like for example, on an average day? >> jimmy: yeah. >> you can never have an average day. that was a trick question. if a day is going average, eat some helium, release a dragon. >> jimmy: your hair is messy but you smell great. you smell clean. >> i would like to emp

i will not rest until that little monkey gets his little monkey back. and i will say this -- [ applause ] >> thank you. if mally the monkey is not returned by next thursday april 11th -- i've set a deadline -- if the germans do not return the monkey to its rightful owner, we will kill david hassle hoff. that's right. that's right, if you want to help, tweet this #freebiebersmonkey. and if we don't get the monkey back, we off the hoff. he's dead. i call it a win-win. thank you. the rescue effort surrounding justin bieber's monkey has been getting a lot of attention here in hollywood. in fact, they've already turned it into a big budget hollywood film. >> first, his daughter was taken. then his family was taken. and now liam neeson is called back to europe. >> justin bieber's pet monkey is in a munich animal shelter. >> for one more mission. >> your monkey was taken but i will get him back. >> bye. >> i don't know who you are. i don't know what you want with justin bieber's monkey. but if you don't let him go, i will hunt you down and i will kill you. >>

free biebers monkey. for every monkey i free, an underprivileged child gets his own monkey.o please, do whatever you can. thank you. we're going to take a quick break. we come back, there is more strange meat at ikea. we have little kids reading things they probably shouldn't. plus, rachel mcadams, kelly oxford and music from kid rock. alright, kid, let's get ready for this morning's quiz. christopher columbus sailed the ocean blue... in 14 hundred 92. nice! follow me. the missouri river is this way! lewis and clark expedition of 1804. oh, he'll never get this. magellan, 1520. awww my 8 layers must've given it away. [ female announcer ] big days call for a breakfast packed with fiber and nearly a day's worth of whole grains. kellogg's frosted mini-wheats cereal. this is one giant leap for mini-kind. [ female announcer ] keeps 'em full. keeps 'em focused. whoo-hoo! you know the average one can cost you over $4 a meal per person? a meal like this costs about $1.64 per serving. a family of four like yours could save over $500 bucks a year. wow. that's amazing! [ male announcer

free bieber's monkey. for every monkey i free, an underprivileged child gets his own monkey. so please, do whatever you can. thank you. we're going to take a quick break. we come back, there is more strange at ikea and we have little children reading things they probably shouldn't. plus, rachel mcadams, kelly oxford and music from kid rock. [ penélope ] i found the best cafe in the world. nespresso. where there is an espresso to match my every mood. ♪ where just one touch creates the perfect coffee. where every cappuccino and latte is made at home. and where i can have exactly what i desire. ♪ nespresso. what else? all eas or tax attorneys.cpas plus, we've got experts to support you all year round. and they're ready now. turbotax. ♪ 'cause germs don't stick on me ♪ [ female announcer ] band-aid brand has quiltvent technology with air channels to let boo boos breathe. [ giggles ] [ female announcer ] quiltvent technology, only from band-aid brand. use with neosporin first aid antibiotic. only from band-aid brand. jolly rancher bold hand soft juicy chews. untamed fruit flavor..

bieber reportedly received the monkey as a birthday present. workers at the shelter say the monkey was separated from his mother far too young and that uses the stuffed animal as a surrogate. >> what will happen now? it is not get the paperwork, he could end up with a new pet like a giraffe or something. >> thanks so much for joining us. remember, there's more news at the top of the hour. captioned by the national captioning institute --www.ncicap.org--

i'm very worried about the monkey. if that monkey stays in germany, it could develop a taste for techno dance music. you don't know what's going to happen. i've been focal with the germans, demanding they set mally free. but it occurred to me that maybe they haven't responded because they don't understand what i'm saying. so to make sure nothing gets lost in translation, i thought i would bring in a german translator. and here he is. this is klaas. right there that would be right. people of germany. you have justin bieber's monkey in custody. [ speaking foreign language. >> jimmy: that is not very nice of you. [ speaking foreign language ] >> jimmy: i am asking you in a friendly way. [ speaking foreign language ] >> jimmy: to please let mally, justin bieber's monkey, go. [ speaking foreign language ] >> jimmy: i am a peace loving man. [ speaking foreign language ] >> jimmy: but if you do not return the monkey to its rightful bieber. [ speaking for ining foreign la language [. >> jimmy: we will have no choice but to kil

he brought the baby monkey into germany. >> as one does. why would you not go without your monkey?urse they took the monkey. >> you think if you're going to take your monkey into a foreign country there'd be some paperwork, right? here's frederik pleitgen. >> reporter: this is the moment we meet the baby monkey brought to germany by justin bieber, but confiscated by authorities. it's now quarantined at this animal shelter in munich. mally seems a little shy when my giant fingers stroke his tiny head. but those taking care of him say he's doing just fine. he doesn't seem to stress at all the shelter's head tells me. but he's very young, about 14 weeks. and if justin bieber got him at the beginning of march, the animal was only about nine weeks only then. here in germany that would not be allowed. the monkey was allegedly a gift for bieber's 19th birthday. he took the animal along when he went on tour in germany. but when his plane landed in munich, customs officials seized the primate saying bieber didn't provide proper documentation to bring it into the country. now, mally spends h

bieber reportedly received the monkey as a birthday present. workers at the shelter say the monkey was separated from his mother far too young and that uses the stuffed animal as a surrogate. >> what will happen now? it is not get the paperwork, he could end up with a new pet like a giraffe or something. >> thanks so much for joining us. remember, there's more news at the top of the hour. captioned by the national captioning institute --www.ncicap.org-- >> welcome to "skyweek." let's see what's happening in the sky from monday, april 8, to sunday, april 14. the moon returns to the evening sky as a beautifully thin crescent, visible shortly after sunset on thursday. on friday, it remains up after the sky is fully dark. it's between the hyades and pleiades on saturday, and on sunday, it pairs beautifully with the planet jupiter. take a good look at jupiter, the king of the planets, because it's getting lower each evening. when the moon and jupiter next pair up, a month from now, they will be much lower, in a much brighter sky. this is tony flande

so they took his monkey, a monkey named mally. they've been holding mally captain i now for 14 days. all this little monkey wants is to be back in the glove compartment of bieber's ferrari. wearing a tank top and a sizeways cap. but it can't do that. on monday, i put germany on notice. i announced if mally the monkey was not returned to justin by midnight april 12, which is about 20 minutes from now, i would have no choice but to kill david hasselhoff. that's right. we don't screw around. we play hardball. i told germany i was going to off the hoff and they scoffed. they did. but i tell you something, they're not going to be scoffing now, because you have 20 minutes germany. show the videotape. >> hello. my name is david hasselhoff. i am being held hostage. 15 days ago, agents of jimmy kimmel kidnapped me, brought me to this hotel room, tied me up, bound me to this chair and put the do not disturb sign on the door. he says if we don't return justin bieber's monkey, he will off the of. well, i have two words for you kimmel, [ germa

so they took his monkey, a monkey named mally.they've been holding mally captain i now for 14 days. all this little monkey wants is to be back in the glove compartment of bieber's ferrari. on monday, i put germany on notice. i announced if mally the monkey was not returned to justin by midnight april 12, which is about 20 minutes from now, i would have no choice but to kill david hasselhoff. that's right. we don't screw around. we play hardball. i told germany i was going to off the hoff and they scoffed. they did. but i tell you something, they're not going to be scoffing now, because you have 20 minutes germany. show the videotape. >> hello. my name is david hasselhoff. i am being held hostage. 15 days ago, agents of jimmy kimmel kidnapped me, brought me to

monkey was confiscated and quarantined because justin didn't have the proper monkey paperwork. so for the last two weeks, mally the monkey has been held captive until justin returns to pay his $17,000 fine. now, this is mally in happier times. isn't that cute? when she travels with justin. unfortunately, after two weeks in germany, this is mally now. justin's management has been trying to broker a deal for mally's release, but so far they failed. that's where i come in. i gave germany an ultimatum. that is if they do not release justin bieber's monkey by thursday at midnight, we are going to kill david hasselhoff. and maybe you're wondering, if. we kill david hasselhoff, who's going to drive kit? well, guess what. kit can drive himself, so don't worry about it. so there you go, germans. the ball is in your court. set that monkey free or we off the of. and we will do it. there is disturbing news. the cookie monster was arrested last weekend. not the real cookie monster. the one that dresses up like him in times square in new york. just like we do here in hollywood, there are peo

landed in munich in germany with his monkey. yeah, a monkey on his back.here to do a concert. and he was, the monkey was seized he didn't have the proper documentation. now german authorities have given justin bieber four weeks to pick up his pet monkey. >> or what? >> or it basically gets put into a more permanent shelter or zoo or gets adopted by, you know, a monkey that can provide it with motherly. >> better go pick up that monkey. >> my gosh, give the monkey up for adoption. maybe do that. apparently. well, apparently on top of that. this is a pr nightmare. there are experts saying the 14-week-old monkey should not have been taken away, he was too young. >>> got to run the video. michael strahan out in central park, mowing the lawn. helping out. when he was a kid he mowed lawns. there he is. >> getting ready for the spring. >> helping out. >> thank you. ♪ >> oh, what's that? >> it's an ad for the colonial penn patriot program, offering up to $50,000 of life insurance. you know, we could really use more coverage. says there are a few simple health ques

>>> justin bieber received a monkey for his 19th birthday.e headlines after it got taken away in germany. how much this just might cost the pop star. >> reporter: this is the moment we meet malley, the monkey brought to germany by justin bieber but confiscated by authorities. it's now quarantined at this animal shelter in munich. she seems a little shy when my giant fingers stroke his tiny head, but those taking care of him say he's doing just fine. >> translator: he doesn't seem distressed at all. but he's very young, about 14 weeks, and if justin bieber got him at the beginning of march, the animal was only about nine weeks old then. here in germany, that would not be allowed. the monkey was allegedly a gift for beaner's 19th birthday and he took the animal along. but when his plane landed in munich, customs officials seized it assaying bieber didn't provi the proper documentation. now he stay miss this room with lots of cuddling from the staff. justin bieber faces a fine of around $75,000 for bringing malley to the country without proper d

[laughter] and two, did you read that sex monkey story in the new england journal of (bleep). >> i'm not expecting the kids to write the magna carta. abc's, 123's i believe any parent could do that. >> jon: you believe aids began when a guy had sex with a monkey. that has to be worth 40% of your salary. [cheers and applause] and you do know kids who depend on welfare are not the only school children who receive the benefit of state funding. penalize everyone who benefits in some way from taxed money. i'm tired of my money going to police departments. hey 911, what is that his last math test? hink ithink i[cheers and applau] >> jon: welcome back. my guest tonight he was the 39th president of these united states. he is here to discuss how his nonprofit organization the carter center has nearly eradicated the guinea worth disease. please welcome back to the program president jimmy carter. how are you, sir? nice to see you. >> good to be back. >> jon: here is what i didn't realize. okay, so you have this thing that you start in 1986. >> right. >> jon: the carter center. they say this gui

positively. >> why do you own a monkey? why do you own a monkey?"the hills" 27 years old. apparently was in india. marking an annual festival, there she is. marks the beginning of spring. apparently she was there, part of the festivities is that they throw kind of paint on -- on the people around you and you take pictures and you walk around with this paint on you. she decided to get into the action not realizing this does not easily wash away. so now this poor child with her now pink hair is having a hard time getting the -- the peachy color out. she has been washing and she didn't realize that it's starting to be a little permanent. >> what do you do in that situation? >> i don't know. i don't know she is still on television. >> strip it down. add the color. >> probably. don't think she will have a problem getting back to her natural. >> remember the "brady bunch" episode and greg's hair turned orange? do you remember that? >> i do remember. let's call greg and see how he got orange out of his air. lauren, may have the answer. pink hair. poor thi

press getting so worked up about what happens in cyprus where they don't seem to give a monkey's about what happens in the u.k. it's ridiculous i think you bring up a few points there first of all this to. twenty billion pound figure put into context are those who are arguing that the half percent rate that is being on offer from the from the bank of england essentially is helping people pay their mortgages it's been calculated recently that mortgage payers are saving approximately seventy billion pounds what you're saying is that simultaneously the economy is losing three times that amount of money in lost income from the coup worship adventure series the forcing down of interest rates in an unnatural way from the normalized rate of four or five percent down to this half a percent and so for every pound essentially that george osborne is gifting to the city of london he's stealing three from the other sixty five million british people who are now suffering as a result of this calculation discount you laded destruction of an economy by george osborne on behalf of a few speculators it's

but let's talk about some other monkeys and those are people who did not own so ringgold at all because they said it might be confiscated meanwhile the people with silver and gold still have their silver and gold and it was the bank accounts that were confiscated your thoughts well that's a very touchy topic obviously backs we have personally i don't think it will be confiscated however there is arguments both sides we i don't have time to go in all the arguments for and against either one would be confiscated than to be more gold and silver or gold certainly got a place in a monetary system with the elite bankers silver has and for you know since like eight hundred seventy three an official basis so if either one be confiscated gold is more likely again i doubt either one but you could argue the other side and there are people that are adamant about competition taking place again i doubt it but what i'm saying is that there was an argument from people who were concerned oh my god my my precious metals are going to be confiscated i'm going to keep my money in the bank instead they now h

. >>> mick jagger meet bieber's monkey and angelina jolie. >>> halle berry is not happy. that's next. kate and i have been married for 15 years. that's 3 moves, 5 jobs, 2 newborns. it's no wonder i'm getting gray. but kate -- still looks like...kate. with nice'n easy, all they see is you -- in one simple step, nice'n easy with colorblend technology, gives expert highlights and lowlights. for color that's perfectly true to you. i don't know all her secrets, but i do know kate's more beautiful now, than the day i married her. with the expert highlights and lowlights of nice 'n easy, all they see is you. and lowlights of nice 'n easy, ♪ ♪ no two people have the same financial goals. pnc works with you to understand yours and help plan for your retirement. visit a branch or call now for your personal retirement review. i'm your hot water heater. you hardly know i exist. that's too bad. 'cuz if my pressure relief valve gets stuck... [ booooooom! ] ...we hot water heaters can transform into rocket propelled wrecking balls. and if you got the wrong home insurance coverage, it's

it was just a couple monkeys screeching at each other.h we were promised. when you speak of human speech you don't think of screaming and spitting and banging on the ground. then we thought about it and realized what the monkeys did sounded really familiar to us. >> you want to do the math? >> i do it all the time. >> entitlements. >> no. [ speaking simultaneously ] >> kind of like howard dean. just as the screeches of the monkey didn't live up to expectations, the screeches on the news channels often don't, either. i can't speak for everyone else but we included something from our show in that as well. on this show we'll try to do a little better than the monkeys. >>> next, a look at margaret thatcher. [ male announcer ] at his current pace, bob will retire when he's 153, which would be fine if bob were a vampire. but he's not. ♪ he's an architect with two kids and a mortgage. luckily, he found someone who gave him a fresh perspective on his portfolio. and with some planning and effort, hopefully bob can retire at a more appropriate age.

we're making sweet and savory "monkey bread". we are making the house monkey bread. chef and owner.ngratulations on the expansion. >> it is something we ahvhave been looking forward to. it adds an outdoor space. known for bbq and blues and of course that monkey bread. it invokes childhood memories. it is that comfort food. let's get started making it. i already ahvhave butter and milk mixture. if you want to throw in half of that. that is going to be some flour. put that in. there we go. a yeast mixture. yeast,water, a little bit of sugar. you do that in advance. when you put that mixture together you want to see it double in size. we are going to mix it just for a few. going to take a little bit longer than what we need. we are going to speed through it. the magic of tv. >>when i put them in earlier they were below the lip of this. >>we are going to take that and pour it all over here. >>put that in here and throw it right into the oven. >> you may have to clean in your own kitchen but we will clean up here. here is one i baked earlier this morning. i have it warming up right now.

monkey. - well, happy birthday, mr. monkey. - thank you. hee! hee! hee! - a birthday party?ar is coming to the party. grr! and... princess penelope pinky pink pig is coming to the party. (snorting) and... - me. i'm coming to the party. - and me, i'm coming to the party. - and you. you're coming to the party too! - i'm so excited! here, daniel. - a party blower? i'm having fun already. (both laughing) - meow, meow, let's sit down, daniel. you sit heeeere... oh, no. meow, meow. daniel, you need a chair. we need more chairs. i'll get my big chair from over there. and you can get that one too. - ok, katerina. here it is. - meow, meow. oh, this chair is heavy! - do you want me to help you? - no, thanks. i want to do it all by... m-myself. whoa! (katerina gasps.) oh, no! - oh, no! grr. - meow, meow. mr. monkey's party, it's...it's... on the floor. everything is ruined, meow, meow. - ruined. grr. - oh... - katerina, meow, meow, how's the party going? i brought you some napkins... oh. oh, my. what happened, meow, meow? - oh, meow, meow,

personally i think the best thing justin bieber could do for himself and for the monkey is to say all right, it was not smart of my friends to give me the animal, and i just don't have the time for it. now i want to do something good for the animal and get it to a good institution where it can live with other monkeys, the head says. but for now, malley remains in quarantine, clinging to the teddy bear the shelter says was given to him by justin bieber. >> good luck to the monkey there. that's going to do it for me. stay with us for "sanjay gupta md." >>> thanks for joining us. could everyone benefit from going gluten-free? we've got some answers ahead. the final four -- we all cringed when kevin ware went down on the court. i'm going to show you exactly what surgeons did to fix his leg. plus, one thing you can start today that will lower your kids' risk of futurer heart disease. >>> but first, on friday, a federal judge allowed the plan b pill. previously it was prescription only if you were under 17. plan b is called emergency contraception and the cdc says one in nine women age 15 t

like, "i'm going to get that monkey, man."> jimmy: are you -- you're the champ in ping-pong now. >> i know -- >> jimmy: are you into ping-pong? >> i love the game of ping-pong, but i'm more of a propagandist than a player. >> jimmy: really? >> yeah, really. i kind of represent people who have fun but aren't really good. unless you have a drink -- >> jimmy: that's me. that's me, right there. >> i think you're good. by the way, you know who's really good? justin bieber. >> jimmy: is he? >> when he's not on his bus. >> jimmy: when he's not stoned, yeah, yeah, exactly. [ light laughter ] >> i'm actually on the way to dubai where we're opening a club and he's playing the day after we open, so i think maybe that was on purpose. that he planned his route, so he could go to spin dubai. and i'll bring you back a t-shirt, by the way. >> jimmy: your sons are djs, am i wrong? >> i have two sons that are djs -- well, they do other things. one of them is still in school, for a little bit longer, anyway. and so it's great, because they turne

. >>> mick jagger, meatloaf, bieber's monkey and angelina jolie. >>> plus halle berry's not-so-happy hawaii homecoming when she meets an overzealous paparazzi next. >>> so in the west the rain is on the way. let me give you a breakdown of the timing. looking okay today. the white shows the clouds. the rain in green. the steadier rain in the oranges and yellows. this is thursday morning. tomorrow morning at this time we could see some of that rain near san francisco. and off the california coastline. then as we go through thursday afternoon and evening, it spreads up the coast of oregon into the northwest. a lot of that should be gone by the time we get to friday. again, the rain timing is for thursday. we're looking okay today and the west, it's the last nice dry day. >> a little shower to deal with. >> we've got to water the lawn. >>> to entertainment. the rolling stones have been using the #startmeupwednesday about their u.s. tour to be announced today. on the flipside, meatloaf announcing he's done with the tour concert. >> i didn't know he was still touring. >> i didn't either, b

. >>> finally, justin bieber's brand-new pet monkey, yes, he's got a monkey now. why not a goldfish? it was kwaurn tquarantined at at because of insufficient papers. don't worry, he's doing okay. >> is biebs doing okay? he's the one i'm worried about. >> some reports saying the name is mali. it gets more and more interesting with justin bieber. >> he's bored. that's all i can say. >>> this comes to us from kxas in dallas ft. worth where one couple overycame their darkest ever. one of the nation's full transplant patients was married in the same spot where he wasser is veerly injured in 2008. weems met jamie nash after her own nearly fatal crash in 2010. the couple say they plan to put their painful past behind them. >> so much in common. they can relate to each other. >> love it. i'm richard lui. this is "early today," just your first stop of the day today on your nbc station. >>> leading the news in "the l.a. times," charged egyptian satirist remains irreverent. >>> and in "the wall street journal," towns see banks cut back branches after years of growth, financi