trevor noah has the daily social distancing show. ially distant kwhat jim axlerod. >> this is the daily swhoe trevor know avenue. >> like a lot of o us it's been a while since trevor noah's had a day at the office. when do you think you'll be back? >> just about four months ago, the 36-year-old host of comedy central's daly show said good-bye to his studio audience. >> even when people drop their phones. >> and started life in the work from home world. >> this is another social distancing show. >> how much can you replicate the energy of a writer's room when it's a zoom room? >> you know, the first few weeks you're stumbling over who's speaking, somebody forget to mute themselves. once we were beyond that, it's become the new normal. >> with this big health crisis we will enslave all of humanity. the opportunity to create something different. how's it going? >> something different. it's interesting what's happening in america. >> is what noah posted at the end of may. >> i feel like everything that happens in the world connects to som

charles: when we come back, trevor noah has a legal reference for president trump in case he's looking a new lawyer. you have to see what trevor is it's not going away. covid-19. more than ever, california needs rapid coronavirus testing. robust contact tracing. support for community health clinics. masks and ppe for those saving lives... for teachers and school personnel educating students. these heroes are doing their jobs. now government must do theirs. keep working through a special session to combat this crisis right now and provide the revenues to solve the problems we know are coming. charles: welcome back to "tmz live." trevor noah has been a fairly vocal opponent of president trump but he's reaching out to him with a full-page ad offering him a legal service. harvey: not unlike larry h. parker. charles: you know those ads where they'll get you out of a bind real fast. harvey: trevor noah and associates and sons. i love that. one-two under w.h. crime. it's really funny. charles: this was a full-page ad he took out in the "washington post." clearly tonight when he's accepting th

new york city to your couch somewhere in the world, this is the daily social distancing show with trevor noah. >> trevor: let's kick things off with the bad news. or as it is known these days, the news. >> america surpasses 150,000 deaths. the staggering toll with florida, california and texas breaking single day death records. >> the u.s. economy shrank at a 32.9% annual rate in the april, june quarter, the worst quarterly plunge ever. >> the labor department says 1.43 million americans filed jobless claims last week. it's the second straight week new unemployment claims have risen. >> lawmakers are still at odds over another stimulus bill with added unemployment benefits expiring tomorrow. >> talks are actually going backwards, not forwards, two months after democrats agreed on their plan, republicans still can't seem to agree on what they want. >> trevor: guys, i don't want to overreact but i'm starting to worry that trump is not going to make america great again and i think i could see what the problem is here, guys. see, the economy is cratesserring. but the covid deaths are rising. so c

i'm trevor noah. it's tuesday, august 11, and here's a tip for anyone heading back to the office for the first time since march: remember to smell the milk in the kitchen before pouring it in your coffee, because after five months, it might be spoiled. then again, it might also cure corona, so maybe just go for it. anyway, on tonight's episode kanye west is out of time, roy wood jr. makes a citizen's arrest, and donald trump wants to make sure you never get a birthday card from mee-maw ever ever again. so let's do this, people! welcome to "the daily social distancing show." >> announcer: from trevor's couch in new york city to your couch somewhere in the world, this is "the daily social distancing show," with trevor noah. >> trevor: let's kick it off with the big news of the day: the vice presidency. it's america's assistant manager, and today, joe biden announced who he's picked to be his v.p. >> we're coming on the air with breaking news. democratic presidential candidate joe biden has made his choi

i'm trevor noah. it's wednesday, august 19, and here's your quarantine tip of the day: if you're still bumping into those people who try to force you to shake hands, what you should do is go in for the kiss. muaaahhh! they'll never make that mistake again. anyway, yesterday was day two of the democratic national convention, and so we're going to tell you why joe biden had a party in a children's library, why this man is holding a plate of calamari, and why kamala harris isn't really black. so let's do this, people! welcome to "the daily social distancing show." >> announcer: from trevor's couch in new york city to your couch somewhere in the world, this is "the daily social distancing show," with trevor noah." >> trevor: last night was the halfway point of the all-virtual democratic national convention, and the night began with the convention's keynote address. now, traditionally, the keynote is given by one speaker who goes on to either become president or the grandpa you hide from company. but this

york city, to your couch somewhere in the world, this is the daily social distancing show with trevor noah let's begin with another important story about race in america. now this is a story all about how one young man's life got flipped, turned upside down. and i would like to take a minute, just sit right there, i will tell you about how this man became the prirns of a town called bel-air. now if you are saying hey, trevor, come on, that's a silt koment. no, it is deadly serious. >> and the fresh prince of bel-air is getting a dramatic makeover. >> you're going to bel-air to live with your uncle. and your yawntie. >> according to the "hollywood reporter" will smith is teaming up with morgan cooper to create a new show base and cooper's viral youtube trailer that he made last year reimagining the beloved 19 90s comedy as a modern day drama. smith is onboard to produce and cooper will cowrite and redirect the reboot. >> trevor: i want to be honest. i don't know how to feel about this, because yes, the trailer looks amazing but that is just the trailer. i'm worried there are other moments f

i'm trevor noah. it is monday, august 17, which means the democratic national convention kicked off today in milwaukee. it also means there's still three days left for john delaney to maybe win the mom no nation. you've got this, my man! some of you may have noticed my face is a little swollen. i wanted to address this before people start rumors. i was walking to subway to get my usual 3:00 a.m. sandwich, and this guy in a maga hat jumped out of nowhere and said, hey, aren't you that super funny comedian from "the daily show"? and he punched me in the face and ran away and hopped on a flight to nigeria. now that we've cleared that up, tonight, america fights back to save the post office, michael kosta tries to smuggle coronavirus on to an indian reservation and how donald trump intends to win the popular vote. let's do this, welcome to "the daily distancing show." >> from trevor noah's couch to your couch somewhere in the world, "the daily distancing show" presents the democratic national convention,

what's going on, everybody, welcome to the daily social distancing show, i'm trevor noah trk is thursday august 13th. and here's your coronavirus tip of the day. if schools are reopening in your area, please remember that you have to be a kid to go to school. you can't just show up cuz you miss having friends. anyway, on tonight's episode, why wearing masks could be a crime. sexism is officially on the presidential tuct and what donald trump wants to do in your shower. so let's do this, people. welcome to the daily social distancing show. >> from trevor's couch in new york city to your couch somewhere in the world. this is the daily social distancing show with trevor noah. >> as we all know the united states is facing unprecedented problems right now. pandemic, economic collapse, racial injustice and on top of all of that americans all over the country are struggling to figure out which hbo they're signed up for. but president trump is laser focused on the most important issue of all. >> the department of energy has taken it upon itself to propose a new rule that would essentially increa

trevor noah is developing a film based on his life story. >> how exciting is that? >> it's very exciting when

fly crunches] >> trevor: well hello, everyone, welcome to the daily social distancing show, i'm trevor noah. today is wednesday the 22nd of july and as you can see, although some people are back in the office, i'm still filming the show from my apartment because there's a giant corona that is just hacking out at my desk. and i don't think can i breathe it in but you know what, better safe than sorry. anyway on tonight's episode jordan klepper sails into the heart of the trump ar a. we ta to jim carrey about writing a novel and some good news for a change, donald trump is pretending to take coronavirus seriously again. so let's do this. well could-- welcome to the daily social distancing show. >> from trevor's couch in new york city to your couch somewhere in the world, this is the daily social distancing show with trevor noahful trdz all right, people, let's kick it off with some ace ball news, that's right, baseball, mark's pasttime and the sport michael swrord an cheated on basketball with. the coronavirus pandemic shut down the major league season before it could even start. but now team

well tomorrow-- welcome to the daily social distancing show, i'm trevor noah it is monday august 109, if you are headed back to school now, remember get the bullies to cram you into a locker. from a medical standpoint that is probably the safest place you can be. anyway, on tonight's episode nasa is kicking racism out of space, jaboukie young white has found joe biden perfect vp. and why president trump deserves to go on mount rushmore, let's do this, people. welcome to the daily social distancing show. >> from trevor's couch in new york city to your couch somewhere in the world, this is the daily social distancing show with trevor noah. in the wake of the black lives matter protests that swement the globe, people have started to examine every part of our society to try and root out the underlying biases that exist. from the police to corporate hiring practices and even pancake syrup. and with all the problems having been solved, now we are moving to outer space. >> nasa is re-examining some of the nicknames it uses for distant objects in outer space. the scientific community sometime

>> trevor: hey, everybody, welcome to the daily social distancing show, i'm trevor noah. and we're back from our july 4th break. i really hope that you have stayed healthy during this crazy time. as for myself, i spent most of the break stabbing things around my apartment just to see if it was actually cake. and the good news is my roommate was not cake. the bad news is i need a new roommate. either way on tonight's show donald trump goes after a true enemy on this kroach pandemic, dr. fauci. michael kosta soferls the dilemma over reopening schools and hillary clinton drops by to make faryk meal-- make america feel bad about it's decision, let's do, this welcome to the dale's social distancing show. >> from trevor's couch in new york city to your couch somewhere in the world, this is the daily social distancing show with trevor noah. >> let's kick things off with the black lives matter movement. although you may be hearing less about them than you used to, protests are still going on around the country. in part because police brutality is still going on around the country

york city to your couch somewhere in the world, this is "the daily social distancing show," with trevor noah. >> trevor: let's kick it off with the big news of the day: the vice presidency. it's america's assistant manager, and today, joe biden announced who he's picked to be his v.p. >> we're coming on the air with breaking news. democratic presidential candidate joe biden has made his choice. nbc news has confirmed that biden has picked california senator kamala harris to be his running mate, the first woman of color in history to be chosen for such a position. so the democratic ticket is biden-harris. >> trevor: that's right, people. joe biden has officially picked kamala harris to be his running mate. say what you want about joe, but the man went black and he's not going back. and i gotta say, i'm impressed that biden picked kamala, even after she destroyed him at that debate. in fact, part of me thinks he only picked her so that she can just never dust his ass in public again. this is an insurance policy. and i'm interested to see what the trump campaign's line of attack is going to be

york city to your couch somewhere in the world, this is "the daily social distancing show," with trevor noah." >> trevor: last night was the halfway point of the all-virtual democratic national convention, and the night began with the convention's keynote address. now, traditionally, the keynote is given by one speaker who goes on to either become president or the grandpa you hide from company. but this year, the keynote was delivered by 17 people, giving exposure to a broader range of the party's rising stars, while also capitalizing on everyone's deep fondness for getting trapped on an endless facetime call. and it wasn't just the keynote that was switched up for this new online format. the traditional roll call also saw a major change, and in my opinion, it was for the better. because, normally, when each state announces which candidate will be receiving their delegates, it's just a bunch of people shouting in an arena while wearing the world's dumbest hats, but this year they mixed things up and did roll call from a picturesque or meaningful location in each state. and i've got to say, i

i'm trevor noah. 20th, and here's your quarantine tip of the day -- if you want to go hang out with friends outside because it's safer, but now it's also too hot, then here's an easy fix -- just stuff a frozen turkey in your shirt. yeah, it will keep you cool and people will think you're pregnant and offer you their seat. that's what i did. i was, like, here you go, ma'am. and then there was a dude with a turkey. we're friends now. yesterday was day three of the democratic national convention, filled with heavy hitters, elizabeth warren, hillary clinton, kamala harris, and that dude that married michelle obama. what was that guy's name again? let's do this, let's catch up on the highlights. welcome to "the daily distancing show." >> from trevor's couch in new york city to your couch somewhere in the world, "the daily distancing show" presents the democratic national convention, electing america's first black president's friend. >> trevor: night three of the democratic national convention was focused o

i'm trevor noah it is tuesday, august 25, and we are now just 70 days away from the election. that's the reason you're starting to hear all the election day songs starting on the radio. the strange hope of the nation's hope and fear in the r.n.c. roy wood, jr. and desi lydic play democracy's most depressing game show. welcome to "the daily distancing show." >> from trevor's couch in new york city to your couch somewhere in the world, "the daily distancing show" presents the republican national convention, celebrating pressure to come. >> trevor: yesterday was the start of the republican national convention, the first and only time donald trump has renewed his vows. going into the convention. i thought it would be tough for donald trump to sell himself for another four years mostly because, you know, we live in a hellscape where 180,000 people have died and we can't go to a movie or hug our grandparents. but then i watched the convention, and, guys, it turns out donald trump has actually done a really good job by preventing all of that from happening. >> from the very beginning

i'm trevor noah. it is monday, august 24th, and here's your quarantine tip of the day -- if you're worried about riding in an elevator with other people, here's all you have to do: just carry a mannequin around with you, and if somebody tries to get in the elevator with you, just put your arm around the mannequin and go, sorry, me and my lover need a little privacy. anyway, tonight, we strap in for night one of the republican national convention. we also look at thao how do you anonis taking over the g.o.p. and we'll be joined by the ever prolific ta-nehisi coates. welcome to "the daily distancing show." >> from trevor's couch in new york city to your couch somewhere in the world, "the daily distancing show" presents the republican national convention, celebrating february's record. >> trevor: tonight was the start of the republican national convention, a week of speeches, celebration and white people walking up to ben carson saying, wait, aren't you the one that died? and if the d.n.c. was all about

captioning by captionmax www.captionmax.com everybody welcome to the daily social distancing shoi, i'm trevor noah it is wednesday, august 26thment and here is your quarantine tip of the day, if you are going back to college but you don't want to get corona, just become a philosophy major. that way no one will want to be around you. any which on tonight's episode we cover day two of the rnc. jrd an klepper investigates another way america's elections are screwed. and then we take a look at the chaos in kenosha. so let's do this, people, welcome to the daily social distancing show. >> from trevor's couch in new york city to your couch somewhere in the world, the daily social distancing show presents, the republican national convention, celebrating february's economy. >> yesterday was night two of the republican national convention. the biggest week for trump campaign staffers who aren't currently in prison. the night got off to a rocky start when one speaker was pulled at the last minute for tweeting out a anti-semitic q-anon conspiracy theory. and i for one am really glad. but i don't know about y

trevor noah is developing a film based on his life story. >> how exciting is that? >> it's very exciting when you got movie and like made for you. you don't just use it as ok, fine. right? you got spoiled, right then that you use it to like help yourself grow better. >> reporter: it's that humility that helps him stay brounlded. >> bam! >> reporter: when you lose what does that feel like? >> you don't actually lose. you learn. >> reporter: what does that mean? >> you lost for a reason and you have to figure that out. >> reporter: do you think people have something to learn from your story? >> yes. that never, never give up. always try your best. >> reporter: a lesson in a game of chess and in the game of life. >> cbs news, new york. >> not yet a grand master, but already grand. i'm major garrett. small request, enjoy your day. . >>> good morning, everyone. i'm major garrett in washington vnlt there is still no new help from congress for the millions of americans struggling in the wake of the coronavirus crisis. at the same time, reported infections in the u.s. passe

i'm trevor noah. it is friday, august 28th, and here's your quarantine tip of the day -- if you wish you should take a summer vacation but you can't because of corona, well here's what you need to do -- order something from grub hub but, in the delivery instructions, ask that when they drop it off, they have to say, room service! bam! you're at best western, baby! on tonight's episode, trump's disappointing r.n.c. speech, dulce sloan digs into politicians' backgrounds, and we check with the big dogs to have n.b.a. to find out what happens now. so let's do this, people. welcome to "the daily social distancing show. >> from trevor's couch in new york city to your couch somewhere in the world, "the daily social distancing show presents the republican national convention, celebrating february to come. >> trevor: so last night was the final night of the republican national convention, also known as the place where facebook comments come to life. and this was the night that everyone was waiting for, the acc

i'm trevor noah. it is tuesday, august 18. which means we are only 76 days away from the election and only 160 days from knowing who won. now, as you know, yesterday was day one of the democratic national convention and if you didn't have time to watch, we'll bring you the highlights, as promised. so let's do this, people. welcome to "the daily distancing show" implete from trevor's couch in new york city to your couch somewhere in the world, "the daily distancing show" presents -- the democratic national convention, elected america's first black president's friend. >> trevor: now, every convention is not just about officially picking the nominee. it's also about telling a story about what the party represents. from the get-go last night, it was clear the democrats were trying to portray themselves as the party of diversity, unity and also patriotism. the show kicked off with people of every race, ethnicity and gender reciting the constitution, then the pledge of allegiance, then singing the national anthem, after which they w

i'm trevor noah. today is friday, august 21, and here's your quarantine tip of the day: if you're still afraid to get a hair united states cut all you should do is tell people you're growing your hair out as a form of protest. you look woke, and no one has to know you're a little bitch. anyway, tonight, we're going to cover all the highlights from the final night of the democratic national convention, including the a biden speech that was so strong, fox news almost forgot to do their nightly benghazi segment. then i'm going to be chatting to tracee ellis ross about her show "black-ish." so let's do this, people! welcome to "the daily social distancing show." >> announcer: from trevor's couch in new york city to your couch somewhere in the world, this is "the daily social distancing show "presents, the democratic national convention. electing america's first black president's friend." >> trevor: the final night of the democratic national convention gave air time to rising democratic politicians who had

. >> so it won't be wholly new to you when you've got late night host trevor noah retweeting that videou ready for another career? because i'm thinking you could have another career. you know, maybe spend your summers doing this if you really want to keep teaching. >> yes, of course, i love my job teaching. but, of course, whatever happens happens and i'll be thankful for it all. most definitely going to continue doing our rap. but who knows what is in our future. >> before we wrap it up, how do you keep the kids motivated? you know, not everybody is going to be able to do this. not every teacher is as creative as you are here. how do you keep them invested during this difficult time? >> well, it's all about relationships and relationship-building. because i promise you, i wouldn't have been able to get the cheerleaders involved if we did not have the relationship with them that we do. so, just continuing to uplift them, especially during this pandemic. because a lot of kids are going through a lot of things, as well as teachers. you know, losing loved ones, being sick themselves. so, w

i just spoke with them on a virtual event last week with trevor noah, and there are such innovative people there. it is the problem you're going to have, can the management let tiktok, whether microsoft or another tech company, can they bring that in house but allow them to do their magic and what's really working. that's going to be the question. >> yeah, i mean, we talk about that all the time, sort of absorbing different types of assets, keeping the culture in tact, rarely has it been with a public example it's going to be fascinating to watch if it happens. zach, we hope you'll come back great insight into technology that few understood up until a few months ago thanks >> later >> carl, that question could tiktok go the way of vine. more on microsoft's potential acquisition of tiktok. straight ahead, angel investor, jason calcanis weighs in and tells us why the app should be banned stay with us >>> welcome back, everybody. i'm sue herera here's your cnbc news update at this hour. in north carolina, a tornado spawned by tropical storm isaias levelled a mobile home park destroying at lea

but i think, to me, and i hope that the power of satire with what trevor noah is doing, it's hard to someone is doing who satirizes all the time in the case of president trump. i hope, with the attack on vice president biden about his coherence is going to get worse, a lot worse, because it's about all they've got. it's been very interesting to sort of keep an eye on the social media stuff about what trump -- trumpastan has to argue. none of the arguments this is fascinating on the presidential campaign, none of the arguments on substance had any salientnes. you can think of one? the argument that he's going to drive us into that future, nobody believes that. joe, you and i have talked about that joe biden will end up centering the republican party than anybody is going to come along centering the republican party. i think that's an existential threat to a republican party who has sold its soul. the check bounced. and they've got to figure out, you know, what are they going to do to attempt to be something approaching the majority party in this demographically changing country. and m

trevor noah is having a good time during this quarantine, his hair is looking great. >> glad somebodybiden accepted the democrats' presidential nomination last night with a promise to move beyond party lines. >> but while i'll be a democratic candidate, i will be an american president. i'll work hard for those who didn't support me, as hard for them as i did for those who did vote for me. that's the job of a president, to represent all of us, not just our base or our party. this is not a partisan moment. this must be an american moment. the current president has cloaked american darkness for much too long. too much anger. too much fear. too much division. >> biden painted the election as a battle for the soul of america, unlike his running mate, senator kamala harris, he did not mention president trump by name. the president reacted to biden's speech on twitter, he accused the former vice president of being unable to actually do the things that he says he can. >> i was just saying i didn't notice until anthony read his lead, tony, that joe biden never mentioned president trump by name