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i just feel like i-- i am comfortable with my acting. like i feel like yeah, i want to chall owning myself but i feel like if i, if a director asks me to do a role, you know, i usually feel like, i won't sign on unless i think i can do it. and i usually, you know, feel like i can do it. like i've never-- i can't remember going on to a movie and thinking oh, yeah, i'm to the going to pull this off. >> rose: yeah. how tough was 127 for you because it's you and your face and, i mean, you know this is a very contained picture. >> yeah, like that's an example where, you know, you say oh, you know, it's all on your shoulders there are no other actors for most of the movie. and isn't that scary. and no, i mean-- . >> rose: you knew going in you had that performance in you. >> no, danny, i mean danny certainly pulled a lot out of me. and i think he got the best of me. but i knew like i thought okay, here is a performance that is dependent on a lot of physical action. they're telling the story through these minute little victories and failures. and that

was ashamed that i had been wounded i was ashamed that i hadn't been a hero. i never understood that my problems with my parents my problems with my wife my ex-wife were buried in the fact that i got wrote up i'd never i never understood it repressed and totally and then . you can go to a coffee shop and i would hear the big bands of my two hundred forty five and i would weep like a baby in public i had no idea that what i was doing like a reply to was going back and try to fly that little boy all night and what happened. the fall of eighty four i was driven to go back to fly to look for birds to spend the night there to rent a car and file and find the place where i was wounded on september seventh one thousand and forty four. and when suddenly. i found the bridge that we crossed the border and i had been shot. i discovered to the hour and the moment where i had been routed forty years before and i cannot explain it but that discovery began my feeling. my generation really repressed with the war was about we didn't want to talk about it we weren't allowed to ta

, i, i, i i don't mindy maybe we can start tonight yeah i saw the dirty looks you gave me don't care what your ex do ♪ ♪ can't nobody love you like i'm going to love you can't no one going to love you ♪ ♪ like i'm going to love you and if you dare, don't dare send me straight to voice mail babe i'm just ♪ ♪ going to text you hope it ain't no issue i just got to let you know no one going to love you ♪ ♪ like i'm going to love you see i, i, i, i i don't mind you putting up a little bit ♪ ♪ of fight, it's all right but why run from what's going to hold you tight through any complications ♪ ♪ baby maybe we can start tonight oh i put that on everything ♪ ♪ ain't no one going to love and ain't no one going to hold you and show you what ♪ ♪ i could show you somebody better told you oh baby ♪ ♪ your name's spelled out on every heart beat ain't no one going to love you ♪ ♪ ain't no one going to hold you show you what i could show you ♪ ♪ oh but if you should go down that same road you've been before ♪ ♪ oh you're in

i remember i remember i just want to i want to close my years i didn't want to hear and i just sat there and he's time that he said. it was like it was permanently being. burned into my brain. and. i lost and that's the last night i've ever gotten a good night's sleep the night before that happened. to me. and. the next morning lieutenant you walked up to me and he said sasser. you know you all right you seem a little distressed a little agitated. no sir not all right. so i'm i'm pretty pissed off what we're what we're doing over your. piece who will give me your interpretation of what we're doing over here. and. how what we're trying to accomplish over here. i just looked at him most of the well said honestly feel that we're committing genocide. and he didn't like my answer and he stormed off towards the. ceo's vehicle. i knew it up point that my career was done i crossed the line and i knew i had to watch my back girl eyes so after that night i pretty much slept with my no i millimeter underneath my poncho liner within easy reach. bay in the dark the door to us. when i first came back

i made note of what she said. i said, i like jesse. she said i wake up every day and i remind myself how lucky i am to have him. >> mm-hmm. >> within four days it was over. the scandal broke. that was it. i find it sad when i read back the notes i had made then. >> i think it was sad. it's funny, like, how quick, you know, life can change and the things that are closest to you can be gone in the blink of an eye. it's not just for me. it's for anyone, you know? >> you're honest in the book and commendably so. you don't hide anything. you take all the criticism firmly on your chin. i suppose the overriding question for me when i read it was, if you had your time again, would you do the same thing? >> as far as like the infidelity stuff? >> as far as -- the key thing here is you talk about the relationship with sandra. you talk about what happened. i will come to that later in the interview. i wondered when i read it if you regret that it happened or you regret it being exposed or how you really feel. >> i think the whole book is hindsight. starting

when i was off the road, you know, i would work on my bikes. i always had some project going at home and i just kind of -- that's what i loved. i loved building stuff. >> you not only made a living but you got a tv show. you became this huge hit. the downside for you and again you're very honest about this. you got married at this stage. you're pretty devoted to this new business of yours. the marriage falls apart. >> i was married to that shop first and foremost. i was married to west coast choppers for the last 17 years. anything else was secondary, you know. >> you then get remarried to a porn star who is abusive to you. that's where when i read the book i start to see the seeds perhaps of a lot of the problems that follow you later. you've been punched by your father. you get beaten up by this adult entertainment star/wife of yours. >> i think that's what was going -- i mean, you know, that relationship was going to what i know. the chaos and everything was exactly what i grew up. i'm going to what i'm comfortable with. >> you were drawn to it? >> yeah. that seemed like home to me. soo

i became a prostitute. i found my salvation? writing. i pushlished a book. i was recently attacked on the streets where i lived. >> the surgery left me deaf. i do not have aids. men are not allowed to be a soldier. i am not asking for your money. please get home safe and keep this pen to share your story too. may be some day, i will get to hear your voice. this next poem is from my first poetry. this is for latinos in the house. can i get a woo. >> i want to break tradition about latino macheese mow. >> forget. i want to break tradition. because blood is supposed to be thicker. but you see, my friends and family, because they love and accept my and don't consider me, foreign language. they do not speak the language. everyone has green contacts. adopting supremist beliefs. when was the last time you saw them playing the maid? i want to break tradition. smashing it against the ground. where our spanish eyes are not blinded. we do not understand hate. foreign language. never. this next poem is called "outside". it's from bullets and butter flies. this is in celeb

i just can't -- like, i just -- you know, i -- i don't know. know how i survived in there as long as i did because it's just like you're cool, but rest of those people, i just can't hang with them. i just -- i don't know. it's -- >> are they all pretty fake, is that what you're saying? >> it's just pretend. it's not real. i'm like the guy that goes to a shop, and i don't hang out in the office. i go to the back of the shop and hang out in the shop with the guys that are greasy dirty, and that's where i belong. it's more about myself and where i belong in this world, and i don't belong, you know, in trying to think that i'm fancy because my wife is fancy and that makes me fancy. it's [ bleep ]. >> and yet that's kind of why you went into the relationship. >> yeah, i think so. i think it was a lot of ego and a lot of perception of what i thought i should have, not what i needed, and i think it was more, you know, a testament to what i felt about in my level. >> do you think you're capable now of being faithful? >> i think so, you know. i think it'

i felt that when i turnod the computer and thought, now i have to write book number 2. i had in mind that i wanted to write something very different from women of the silk that was strictly about the feminist chinese women during the turn of the century and i wanted to write about my japanese culter. i didn't have the story or the culture unfortunately because i was born in san francisco, half chinese and half japanese but raised in the chinese culture. when it was time to write the second book and i knew i wanted to explore my japanese side it was going to be difficult in the way that i didn't know the culture. right away i had to learn a lot. it was something that was not engrained in me besides the story. i sat down and thought about the story my mother told me about her brother being ill. he at one point went from hong kong to japan to recuperate. he was the one that wanted to be an artist and wanted to paint. i thought about that because it must have been hard growing up in hong kong to be far away from everything and have a dream and get sick at this point. i though

i will try to answer a, b, c. for me, i know that the first thing i began to think about when i thought i wanted to write a novel was that i wanted to write about my culture. and because i had grownup in the chinese culture i wanted to write about china. i wanted to find out more about myself because of i was raised in the bay area and because i didn't know culturally a lot of things i wanted to know. i knew i wasn't going to write about myself and knew that i was not going to write about my family. but i wanted to write about an aspect about china and women. those were the 2 things i knew when i began the first book. i was fortunate enough to it stumble upon the silk working women which gave me everything i wanted. it gave me the culture. it gave me a sense of what it meant to be a female chinese women in that time and a sense of empowerment on what they had done. regardless of what they understood they were doing at the time. they didn't know it was a culture that was earning money and living independent of husbands and family that was doing everything against what it meant to be in the chinese culture. i hadn't h

so i think that is why i grew up -- i grew up quickly. and i grew up more -- knowing that it is not about me. i guess at the end of the day. it is about deaf kids. it is about the deaf world. simple as that. i think that's one advantage i have. >> john, you said the same thing about your charity. always for the charity, back of your mind. i get that feeling. i went down to san antonio, texas, and saw these incredibly badly wounded soldiers. raising the money for. it was one of the most moving things i have done in my life. to actually see the people who would benefit from this fund-raising. i needed no more galvanizing to try to win the competition. but i also know about myself that -- you know, when it comes to -- i was incredibly competitive to win that. forget everything else. i wanted to win. by the end i had been through so much. i see it in both of you. that same thing. >> it will push you to new levels of -- competitiveness. truly believe that. you know. i want to win this competition. i want that quarter of a million dollars. i want it.

have a problem with that i mean i think i know i could never be young again because i could never watch a film on an i phone yeah i heard yesterday that first phone company has made a phone that may shoot three d. i mean and you can watch three d. without glasses this is crazy i think i think this is just by you know i mean and you know very often people. are. prone to the idea that that is something special i mean in berlin they gave awards to a short film made with an icon thank you thank you very much don marco and just sort of mind that my guest today was marco miller director of the venice film festival what about with more first time coming from what's going on in and outside the shop and so then they are to take it. home. from. home.

me why didn't i do this i once tried i don't a school and. i remember we live in the wired new york city totally alone i don't have to put my bathroom sash around on it. and why i got down was because. my friends. i had made after the war who had been through the same thing i had but i felt if i get back to my self i would betray. the bottom me. cucina vietnam federer for tain't right in sixty six by eighty they call it hell's half acre because of the american people. that have been still there tunnel go out and be a crime snipers have done most of the damage today was no exception on this attack on the twenty seventh and fortunately the framed wall founds moved out to attack the snipers open up from such perfectly camouflaged positions the most of the a cockney like the whole day with c. and lot of the enemy a sergeant was hit in the shoulder and leg as he rolled over a third shop were up to his back. a medic broke for cough and rushed to his act as it dropped to his knees to begin given a bullet smashed into the stomach. both a sergeant and a

i actually did not feel like i had support, so that is where i messed up. and ie been here two years, where i should be done or finishing up, but i think it was the support, where i just did not feel that, especially in my home. when i came here, the counselors, a kind of felt like, "you just do this" and pushed me away. i am a fashion design student, and it sucks that i have to go to l.a. or new york to get that type of experience like everybody says. i do not want to do that. i definitely want to make san francisco a booming place for fashion, and i know it is going to happen. i have confidence in that, but there should be more creativity and stuff like that. music, for example. the city is definitely going to come around to that more. and i know technology is definitely going to advance that. they should be both up there with each other because it is definitely happening. >> yes, i also think similarly to them. bring more classes to the school. most of the classes in the school are like teachers and students -- they do not really communicate outside of the cla

i have never felt the way i do for anyone the way i feel for her. i and i have never had someone like have my back, 100%, you know? and stick by me when everyone turned their back. and she says [ bleep ] it, i'm your friend and i stand by. i don't care what anybody says. and i think that's the definition of, like, what people that care about each other should be. >> the irony is that sandra said exactly that, that she felt that's what you were to her. >> she didn't say exactly that. >> pretty much. she said you were the rock. >> yeah, but she said that same speech at four different awards shows. you saw two of them. >> what's your point? >> i don't know, you can take out of it whatever you get out of it, you know. >> you don't think she meant it? >> um, i think she meant it to a certain extent, you know. what does she do for a living? >> movie star. an actor. >> what? >> an actor. >> okay, cool. >> you think it was an act? >> i think people have to live in that world. >> are you glad to be out of it? >> man, 100%. i just can't like -- i just, you know

i feel like we might disagree on this, but i feel that his -- i don't know. i feel that his levels of testosterone his -- i make things medical advice up in my head. but i feel like his hormonal level has balanced. i feel he's adjusted more. i mean it might not be chemical. >> that's what i think it is. >> he's adapted more. >> you physically going through all that, when you get pumped full of hormones and testosterone you aren't as balanced as you like to be. >> most men, it happened when they're teenager and they have a lodge long time to get used to it. for me it happened at 40 and i had to adjust to having a new range of emotions that i didn't have before. >> we'll have a short break. when we come back, i want to get to the nitty-gritty. are you going to get married now. >> oh, my goodness. >> and i don't know, children? can we talk about children? >> sure. >> sure. >>> draw back a little. now push in. pull out fast. okay. good, jenny. >> people think i'm a -- idiot, you know? >> sometimes, you know. >> see? it's so easy. i don't know why i've been freaking

i am not a poet. i don't care much for. i don't spend me weekends read anything writing. i like to have cocktails but i do not have a drinking problem regardless of what state i wake up in. i don't need drugs to open up my imagination. i am not a poet. i can tolerate half an hour of spoken word poetry. what my cats are up to. i always carry my business cards. i am not a poet, i only write to masture bait my mind. i am trying to convince myself that poetry it save lives. it's the dust of art. and i am going to close with to poet. americano. i look at myself in the mirror. trying to figure out what makes me an american. i see chickens. practicing religions without a roof. i see my own blood. proud american blue genes labels. i see them sits outside with the eyes of an alley cat. i see myself trying to be more like james dean. i see carlos san tanna. more than sporadic latino explosions. as american as bruce spring teen and elvis presley. i see taco bell. i see purple, red, blue, green, orange. i see cheetah revera on broadway. as american as the lee's, the kennedys. none soun

i just -- i didn't think a handshake expressed the moment, you know? >> oh. >> i'm a hugger. i -- iine watson. >> oh, pam taylor. >> well, may i say that you certainly raised a wonderful -- >> well, thank you. he is wonderful. i wish i could say the same about you and your daughter. ♪ >> oh. i said that the wrong way. i mean, i wish i had met her earlier, before now and -- >> why don't we go into the house. >> jimmy: yeah, yeah, exactly. come on -- fun. [ cheers and applause ] "jumping the broom" is in theaters next friday, may 6th. paula patton, everybody! tim mcgraw performs next. come on back! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ [ male announcer ] this is lara. her morning begins with arthritis pain. that's a coffee and two pills. the afternoon tour begins with more pain and more pills. the evening guests arrive. back to sore knees. back to more pills. the day is done but hang on... her doctor recommended aleve. just 2 pills can keep arthritis pain away all day with fewer pills than tylenol. this is lara who chose 2 aleve and fewer pills for a day free of pain. and get the all day pain rel

couldn't do i couldn't make money at it so i came back to. thought i was in jackson i wanted to live the induction center and signed up i believe i believe. i actually found can you see me. this is a cotton mill or there were five textile mills and i want to run for about two months and looking for a job and finally one of the old neighborhood greats had done around for years as per i get a job in the cotton mill. i went straight to the owner of her. mommy. the internet in tacoma. i grew up in trailer park i grew up in a little small town called perelandra texas that's near kallstrom and i remember sitting on a couch and watching. the first gulf war. two hours ago allied air forces again an attack on military targets in iraq in kuwait and watching it on the television seeing how quick the wind and the hoopla afterward and from the liberated be too. awful great to be an american eyes filled to we had lost the ghosts of vietnam. i remember sitting there on the tiles that night and thinking most of you want to go into here you know to go into the military. be doom doom. s

i. i i i. i. i. i i. i. i. left. i. live . less. i. hate strikes on the still luck of. the league after all off i'll see you soon whether it's coming off in just a tick. we'll . bring you the latest in science and technology from around russia. we've got the future of coverage. repairing a broken ancient. highway construction and humanitarian aid. causes shady officials look at the spoils of war it's the people who pay the price. profiteering here is no longer just down to drug trafficking. afghanistan and the dollar. up steam. and. in some cases both parties available in grand hotel here in grand hotel emerald marco polo all of a close.

i said. that i hate that i had had growing up in the south i think i had expanded. because of what was happening here not because so loosen the people. i feel i've become an animal i've never killed no remorse. i literally saw young men turn into. psychopathic killers. but the great thing about the marine corps is the training process that the young men and women go through gives them all the ability to kill at least one time to put that warrior ethos in effect and then once you've done it and then it's on you. there's so many things happen in a war that put you at odds with your sense of right and wrong. i've seen things that would be described as is war crimes. that the sergeant who had the ring of yours who. is not a secret i mean he's walking around with a big wiring with human ears punched through the lobe and they're all hanging on the ring these are people he has cut off for years to try to get information. on the shooting civilians. you don't really call it it's not like you're shooting a scene there it's like. collateral damage. hungry for the. we've got. th

i believe or i will go in the woods or i think. that i was a good soldier. but you know most all go on the other side and i think i'm just a good. player this is artsy and now the main stories we're covering for this are europe's most wanted war crimes suspect is to appeal against his extradition to the hague places genocide charges despite claims right from that it should have been massacred up to eight thousand muslims and nine hundred ninety five crowds gathered in serbian capital will use. terror and disaster writes yourself for washington wants to warn the public of possible threats to present new additions and measures the u.s. has present place since nine eleven but live in secret say the government is taking a fear factor too far. and. europe is pushing its preferred candidate to take over if again as the new plunges deep into debt was still russia india china and south africa found in should get the job. though news in the heart of last time first we assess what it means to be a good soldier our special report is next or not. there was one particular

c--i can keep this a secret as long as you want. i know you don't think i can. i-i will. no. no, you know what? i think it's actually better if i just tell everybody at once, you know, just to-- just to get it out there. y-y-you know what-- you know what i can do? is i can call mom, and i'll-- i'll just have her arrange one of her--one of her dinners, but--but it's like... (sighs) kev. kev, it's okay. it's gonna be okay. t $?$? . uh, i'll leave as soon as i can. okay, dear. bye. so that guy that just stole 10,000 gallons of wine right out from under us? well, it turns out he was indicted on felony charges years ago for price fixing at voley foods. didn't william work at voley back then? so what are you getting at? (chuckles) come on, saul. don't be cagey with me. this guy just sabotaged a major component of my business plan. right. he knew william, he's undermining us. so what are we dealing with here, hmm? what do you know? yes, they worked together at voley foods. they started together, they shared accounts. obviously, they were very good at it and decided they wanted t

was, i guess what you would call a classic tomboy. what i would say was -- i was really a boy. i felt like a boy and my friends were all boys and i was comfortable in that space in school from ages probably, you know, 6 through 10, 11. and then as i started to get older and about to head into puberty, things started to get difficult. expectations of how a young lady should act started to creep in and then of course i hit puberty and my body just started to transform in a way that was exactly the opposite of what i wanted it to do. >> were you mature enough to understand that this transformation wasn't right for you? or did you just feel odd? >> it felt like it wasn't right for me, but at that point i didn't know about, you know, being transgender. i didn't know people could transition. i had no idea. i just knew something felt incredibly wrong and what was happening to me, particularly -- i was very aware of my breasts and that they just felt wrong on my body and that i always tried to de-emphasize in every way. wear baggy shirts and really try to de-emphasize them in every way i

>> translator: i think -- well, coming into the show i knew that i would be -- i mean, i would try to first raise as much money as i can for my charity, which again, i said it was starkey hearing foundation based in minnesota. and i wanted to make sure that all these kids got the hearing aids, kids who can't afford them, whether they're in the united states or in developing countries. so that's the first thing i knew any head. that was the purpose i came to the show. and as for me as an actor, as an author, as whatever, and being a mom, a wife, i knew all that, bring that skill set. but once the show started, i thought, okay, this also involves working with people. and you have to help them as much as they have to help you. and you have all sorts of different personalities. all sorts of people coming to the table. and i think what i learned about myself is that i never really totally listened to myself so much, focused on myself so much, so intensely, and had an opportunity to look at who i am and why i'm here and why i want to do this or why i want to listen to this person as i did o

and i watched day one, i watched day two, i watched the entire thing. i went from wanting him to be taken down to wondering where's the beef, you know, what's going on here? i don't understand what i'm watching here. i don't understand the color commentary that's on the screen where they're saying, oh, this is outrageous. and i didn't understand the bumper stickers that were going by me on the streets saying, "i believe anita." i said, i believe anita what? i don't understand what's going on here. everything that i knew, everything that i picked up at college in my american studies cultural marxist, oppressor/oppressed, black people are always right, white people are always wrong, i didn't understand how ted kennedy -- the ted kennedy of chappaquiddick fame -- how joe biden and a series of white, privileged men could sit in judgment of this man who was the son of grand participants who were -- grandparents who were sharecroppers who raised him, and he went to yale law school. he did everything right including allowing for anita hill to rise through the ra

i haven't -- i mean, i feel very fortunate. i thought the beneficiary of this movement that came before me, he did mention my mom but i really do feel like the actual areas of like a great, the one who is benefiting from the woman who came before me. and i felt pretty generally supported, people like granta, other journals. >> they don't exist. [laughter] >> in this universe. >> so i don't know that it's ever stopped me. and the way that i feel, you know, in sort of the tours is an adjective. i think the way -- in fact, sort of getting may be gender adjectives that i don't know. on the contrary i don't know a story but 13 of al qaeda restaurant written by a man debussy. i think that be an interesting experiment. if anybody out there once in a fellow at the want to take me up on it, you know, because if you think certain adjectives come up, plucky. we're talking a whimsical is one. or quirky. you know, to be can sometimes feel a little patronizing. but that's the way that i probably -- >> have you ever been called quirky, julie? >

mean, i think it's -- i don't know how you deal with it. i -- because i think there's always the question if -- what people's real intentions are. >> yeah. >> but i don't know. i think you just have to wish for the best. it's a gamble. >> life's a gamble, though, isn't it? >> life is a gamble. >> when we come back, we'll talk about projects outside "glee," this movie you're about to start making. >> sure. sure. :20011231][v you were the last to be born in a family of 7 brothers. that's why you had to sleep on the seventh bunk bed and you developed vertigo, and that's why you couldn't become a pilot and you had to study engineering. you patented 367 inventions, but only 3 made it to market. that's why you don't have an apartment on the 16th floor and you have it on the fifth, but that's where you met carmen. with her, you had 3 children. the fourth ended up being a dog. numbers change your life. that's why you should take control of your credit score by paying your bills on time. for more tips, visit numberschangeyourlife.org. and started earning loads of

i. i i. i. i. i. i. i. i. live. less. i. get strikes on the still look at. the league for all of that i'll see you soon whether it's coming up in just a tick. wolf . remind you the latest in science and technology from around russia. we've done the future coverage. them. today.