♪ ♪ pa-da-pa, pa-da-pa, pa ♪ ♪ jimmy kimmel live >> from his house! >> jimmy: hi. i'm jimmy kimmel.my kimmel. i try to say my name twice out loud every day now so i don't forget it. which is especially important on what might be the most forgetful day of the year. it's 4/20. not only is it 4/20, it's 4/20/20. this day is so stoned, it's repeating itself. between 4/20 and all the bread people are making, this country has never been more baked than we are today. unfortunately, health experts say smoking pot during the virus crisis is not a good idea. it can irritate the lungs and make you more susceptible to illness. and also, you might eat all the food you hoarded. do we even need marijuana anymore? everyone is sitting on the couch watching netflix and wondering what day it is already. later on, we will be joined by the santa claus of 4/20, mr. snoop dogg. assuming he can get his computer open. you know, on saturday night i was part of a special that aired all over the world. it was called "one world: together at home." i co-hosted with jimmy fallon and stephen colbert. it raised $12

of the kimmel that day the story breaks everybody knows about it kimmel doesn't ask one question about it right and you also have to give a lot of credit to katie helper from the katie helper show she's the 1st one to really talk to terror redan air that interview crystal ball over at the hill rising on the hill has done it as well and that's what needs to happen but these independent media outlets the non-corporate own who do not you know engage in this kind of tribalism they're out there talking about a story. they're telling people listen this is a thing that nobody said yes 100 percent we definitely did but it's really what it is this is an allegation joe biden himself has said we got to believe women all of his defenders right now and said we gotta believe women and here it is when it's not politically convenient let's not be here let a list of people stop of organization stonewall a.b.c. stonewall n.b.c.

. >> around schwarzeneggar on jimmy kimmel. we appreciate yo ♪ ba, da, ba, da bar, ba, da,da, ba,ba ♪ ♪ jimmy kimmel live ♪ this is ridiculous. from his house! >> jimmy: hello. i'm jimmy kimmel. i'm the host of this house. the reason i look like a my little pony is that today, in case you aren't aware, was supposed to be take your kid to work day, which is kind of every day for a lot of us now. they were originally planning to rename it "take your kids to the breakfast nook for a zoom meeting with no pants on day" for this year only, but decided to leave it alone. so, my daughter jane did my makeup tonight. are you going to do it? >> eye shadow. >> jimmy: eye shadow, ah-oh. >> yeah. oh, my gosh. ha, ha. you should look at yourself when you're done, okay? >> jimmy: mm-hm. i will. do i look beautiful? >> you look like a girl! >> jimmy: what do you think, guillermo, do i look like a girl? >> guillermo: a little bit, yeah. you look beautiful. >> jimmy: thank you, very much. and thank you, jane. who knew my color palette was jolly r

[ bleep ] >> thank you, jimmy kimmel!u, jimmy. >> oh, my gosh. >> jimmy: that's when people are allowed to be in a trailer together. you're both very welcome. >> everyone always asks, do you ever want to get back at eric, my answer's like i just don't have the time or the energy to do it, so like when you said that you were going to do this for me, i thought, this is going to be great. it's going to be epic, i just have to show up. i cannot believe this turned around on me. >> jimmy: sometimes that's how it goes. so now next week on wednesday is the finale of "modern family." we'll see you guys back that week. we'll have everybody back. we'll piece everybody together virtually. >> thank you for not triple crossing me. i was concerned the whole time that this was going to eventually, and i still think could come back. >> jimmy: you never know. you never relax. thank you, gentlemen. that's eric stonestreet and jesse tyler ferguson. the finale of "modern family" on wednesday night. when we come back, we scare the bejesus out

. ♪ jimmy kimmel live from his house!dicky: abc's "jimmy kimmel live," brought to you by sprint! e great service you expect without leaving the safety of your home. sprint.com makes shopping easier by offering free next day shipping and no activation fees on our best new phone deals, like the amazing iphone 11 for just $15 a month when you switch. for now sprint.com is the best way to learn about our plans, buy new phones and get the services you need. stay healthy and go to sprint.com today. for people with hearing loss, visit sprintrelay.com whaso let's do the rightver chanthing, today.ow. let's stay at home. let's wash up. let's always keep our distance - please, six feet apart at least. let's look after ourselves, as well as others. it will all be worth it. we can all do our part. so those on the front line can do their part. and when this is over, we will all, continue, to thrive. ♪ jimmy kimmel live >> his house! >> jimmy: welcome back to "jimmy kimmel live" from my house. tonight on the show, we have a great perfor

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jack black on jimmy kimmel live. ♪ bra, da, ba, ba, da, ba, ba, da, ba, ba, da, ba, da ♪ ♪ jimmy kimmelthis is ridiculous. >> from his house. >> jimmy: greetings, it is i, the lone ranger. we are back in our time slot with abbreviated show. i hope you had a happy easter. we had one of those family dinner video, this is what our easter was like. unmute yourself! grandma, you have to, we can't hear, hit "unmute". it was less like an easter dinner and more like i was hosting a non-celebrity reboot of hollywood squares. that's what you do. easter's a tough one during a pandemic. every two minutes we're telling our kids to wash their hands. then all of a sudden we're go being, yes, go ahead and eat those jellybeans you found under a bush. our 5-year-old, jane told my wife, i promise, if i see the easter bunny, i won't hug him. i won't say as a parent, easter makes you realize what a solid back story santa claus has. he lives at the north pole. makes toys. my kids asked where does the easter bunny live? i don't know, the sewer. this is what the easter bunny was up to in new jersey yesterday.

so stick around. ♪ ♪ >> dicky: abc's "jimmy kimmel live."o you by petsmart. everything your pet needs... delivered directly to your door. or save 10% when you buy online and pick up in store... now with curbside pickup. shop petsmart.com or download our mobile app today. petsmart with everything going on, i have always wanted to be a teacher. we've had to alter our classroom settings. we have to transition into virtual learning to make sure that the education is continuing. (vo) verizon and "the new york times" are offering 14 million students free digital access to "times" journalism. hey guys want to stack different pringles flavors to create new flavor combos? here i'll... go first. pizza, barbeque and ja-lapeño. the spicy barbecue pizza stack. get him! grandpa what's going on? we're trapped in a pringles commercial, they must have taken us in our sleep. stack pringles flavors make new ones. more than ever, your home is your sanctuary. that's why lincoln offers you the ability to purchase a new vehicle remotely with participating dealers.

right now on jimmy kimmel live. ♪ ba, da, ba, ba, da, ba, ba, da,ba ♪ ♪ jimmy kimmel live ♪ this is ridiculousis house! >> jimmy: hello and welcome to my home. i'm dr. sanjay gupta. i think. right? i could be him. i'm honestly not sure anymore. i'm in a house doing a show, to no one. i'm starting to understand why mr. rogers started using puppets. a special hello to those of you who watched the disney family sing along tonight. i don't know about you, but for me every day is a disney family sing along. today marks one full month since kids have been home from school here in los angeles. more than anything, i miss that rush of endorphins you feel when the car door slams shut, and you peel out of the preschool parking lot like a hazzard. my cousin sal and his wife decided they're sending their kids back to school on may 1st no matter what. even if it's closed. if it's closed, they can hang out by the hopscotch area until three o'clock. there is word now that students may take the sat and act tests from home this year. wow, if only felicity huffman had waited -- what does a college acceptance let

. ♪ ba, da,ba ♪ "jimmy kimmel live" this is ridiculous. from his house! >> jimmy: hello. jimmy, i'm the host of the show. hello again to those who joined me earlier tonight on "who wants to be a millionaire." thank you for watching that. we are beaming to you from my house, which is where i spend every minute of my life now. my closest friends are pillows now. if nothing else, this experience of being cooped up has taught me that i would never survive in space. three days into the mission, i'd be in the escape pod trying to find a costco on the moon. this is a big day for the planet. today is earth day. the 50th and final earth day. here in l.a., not long after the clock struck midnight last night, we got hit with an earthquake. i was in bed. the earth got up early and woke everyone up like a five year old does on her birthday. i will say though, it was scary because the epicenter was close by, but it was kind of refreshing to worry about being killed by something else for a change. donald trump celebrated mother nature today with a shovel. the president, first lady and m

thank you. ♪ >> jimmy: welcome back to "jimmy kimmel live" from my house.salute our healthcare hero of the week. she is a nurse from new orleans who is on the frontline fighting covid-19. tomorrow night george stephanopoulos will join us from his covid quarantine. he announced today that he has the coronavirus. i think we might check in on my aunt chippy tomorrow. and later this week, we'll hook up with jason bateman and seth rogen too. so please join us for that. our guest tonight is a supremely talented actor and singer. he is on loan from the devil himself, joining us from his very own house of rock, please say hello to jack black. hi, jack. >> jimmy! >> jimmy: you look good. how are you doing? >> i'm doing well. yeah. i got my best shirt on for you. i don't usually dress it doesn't feel right without a big "jimmy kimmel live" entrance. do you mind if i start over? do an entrance? >> jimmy: yeah, i'd be happy to do that. you do have the best entrances maybe of any guest ever. so what do you want me to do? >> do you have the band? can the band play some m

zyrtec muddle no more. ♪ "jimmy kimmel live" ♪ from his house welcome back to jimmy kimmel live from up later we shot music with them at our studio before it got boarded up so don't yell at us. their single is called "calling on me." sean paul and tove lo from the mercedes benz stage. katy perry will compete against a super fan in a trivia contest about herself. and we are also going to revisit probably the most important video we ever made. a few years back, guillermo and i learned the proper way to wash our hands from an infectious disease specialist at the mayo clinic. do you remember that guillermo? >> guillermo: yes, i do, like four years ago. >> jimmy: yes, and how to you wash your hands? what does it look like? what do you do? >> guillermo: i do this like here for 20 seconds. >> jimmy: no. that's not what you do. tomorrow night we will celebrate april fool's day in style. we went to the set of modern family so that jesse tyler ferguson could pull a big prank on eric stonestreet. but somehow that all got turned around. and we will have music from the bathroom from jessie reyez.

i'm jimmy kimmel. i'm jimmy kimmel.say my name twice out loud every day now so i don't forget it. which is especially important on what might be the most forgetful day of the year. it's 4/20. not only is it 4/20, it's 4/20/20. this day is so stoned, it's repeating itself. between 4/20 and all the bread people are making, this country has never been more baked than we are today. unfortunately, health experts say smoking pot during the virus crisis is not a good idea. it can irritate the lungs and make you more susceptible to illness. and also, you might eat all the

better life. ♪ >> jimmy: welcome back to "jimmy kimmel live" from my house.on bateman who has agreed to let us test him on his own career from quarantine. you've been on tv for a long team, what, 75 years? >> 76. >> jimmy: now we're going to play a game called "was i in it". i will read the description of a tv show or movie, you will tell us if you were in it. bonus points if you can remember the character's name. a teenage scam artist lives with his mother. >> that's "it's your move", matthew burton, and he love as good point. >> jimmy: next, a successful lawyer quits his job to become a teacher. >> was in it. it was called "the jake effect", so i'm going to say his first name might have been jake. not great on the last name. >> jimmy: good enough. that's correct. a gay mild-mannered writer lives in greenwich village with his homophobic roommate. >> you bet you, that was "some of my best friends" taken from the film "kiss me guido." i was the homosexual. when i auditioned for it, i asked the casting director would they like me to read in a flamboyant way? an

i'm jimmy kimmel.nts to be a millionaire" celebrity edition, which returns to abc in primetime on wednesday night after the series finale of "modern family." and i've got two very special players here to practice with. first of all, jane kimmel, who loves to draw and loves to watch "frozen ii." let's have a round of applause for jane. welcome, jane. and he's 2 years old. his name is billy. he loves spider-man and t-rexes. billy kimmel, everyone. are you guys ready to play "who wants to be a millionaire"? >> yes. >> jimmy: okay. we've been practicing this. for 1,000 pennies the first question is for you, jane. jane, what does an elephant have on its face? a, a red nose. b, a trunk. c, a mustache. or d, a pickle. >> a trunk. >> jimmy: is that your final answer? >> yes. >> jimmy: that is correct, jane! very good. for 1,000 pennies. billy, for 2,000 pennies, which animal eats bananas? is it a, a monkey? b, a goldfish. c, a tiger. or d, a chicken. >> monkey. >> jimmy: is that your final answer? >> yes. >> j

hey. [ cheers and applause ] >> [ bleep ] kimmel. >> jimmy: fun fact.ery special performance from the bathroom. jeff tweedy of wilco and his sons. >> jimmy: thanks to tracy morgan. apologies to matt damon again for that whole tom brady misunderstanding even though it was his fault. you can join me back here from home tomorrow with samuel l. jackson and music from sean paul featuring tove lo. but first, before the great quarantine we had wilco booked on our show to promote their album "ode to joy." for obvious reasons we had to cancel. but lead singer jeff tweedy and his sons came one a very special performance from the bathroom at their house. you can watch the tweedy show every night at 10:30 eastern on their stuff in our house instagram account. and now with the song "evergreen" here are sammy, spencer, and jeff tweedy live from the lavatory. ♪ when i get back to wherever i travel i'll tell you what i've seen ♪ ♪ the good and the bad ♪ and the hearts and the hassles ♪ ♪ i'll tell you all about where i've been ♪ ♪ and i won't ever leave again ♪ now you

. >> jimmy: welcome back to "jimmy kimmel live" from my house.ght is the only man ever to hold the titles of mr. universe and governor of california, beaming in now from casa la vista. please welcome arnold schwarzenegger. hello, governor. >> hey, jimmy, how are you? you're looking really good. >> jimmy: you've got an infestation there, it seems. >> i am telling you, i have everything here. >> jimmy: you sure do. >> i have my lulu here. they love to eat, i just finished lunch, and now they're here and they'd like to participate a little bit with the lunch. i hope you don't mind. >> jimmy: you have a donkey and a horse, right? >> yeah, on my left is and this is lulu. >> jimmy: how does it work? are they free to roam the house? >> yeah, they go upstairs, they go down stairs, they are all over the place. they watch me when i work out. ang and everything like that. it's fantastic many they fight for the same food. this is whiskey. she likes oatmeal cookies. my favorite thing is oatmeal cookies. of course they take all my oatmeal cookies away, right,

♪ >> dicky: portioning of "jimmy kimmel live" were brought to you by slim-jim. yeah! ♪ life is too far to walk alone. ♪ ♪ you can't do it on your own ♪ ♪ but time will show ♪ and don't you know how bad we need each other? ♪ ♪ you know what i'm saying? ♪ hmmm...mmm...mmmm...mmmm hold on one second... sure. okay... okay! safe drivers save 40%!!! guys! guys! check it out. safe drivers save 40%!!! safe drivers save 40%! safe drivers save 40%!!! that's safe drivers save 40%. it is, that's safe drivers save 40%. - he's right there. - it's him! he's here. he's right here. - hi! - hi. hey! - that's totally him. - it's him! that's totally the guy. safe drivers do save 40%. click or call for a quote today. switch and get our lowest pricea on unlimited...nt than ever. just 25 dollars. 4 lines of unlimited from metro. 25 dollars each. visit metro for details. ♪ when you need it, jack delivers: order on uber eats, postmates and grubhub. weveso we can stillg a answer your calls. now. and we are monitoring our system 24/7 to ensure that we have a fast reliable network, keep th

da, pa ♪ ♪ jimmy kimmel live >> from his house. >>> hi.mel. today is monday, march 130th. what year i don't know. we are back on television with the first of what is hopefully a limited series we call "jimmy kimmel live from his house." and this is my house. it's the only room in my house that's not completely crusted in play-doh right now. i'm also not making these videos on my ipad anymore. i got a whole system now. i've got three cameras. i've got basically the same setup they use to shoot pornos here. the only thing i don't have is people. everything is being operated remotely tonight. from space. mike pence is controlling this show from the mars rover right now. i hope you had an okay weekend. i had a chilling thought last night. i hesitate to even mention this because i feel like if -- i don't know. i feel like if i do it won't happen. so i'm going to mention it. as bad as this all is, and i'm not talking about the serious stuff, people dying, i'm talking about the inconvenience of staying at home, there is one thing that can make it

naturally superior sleep. ♪ ♪ >> jimmy: welcome back to "jimmy kimmel live."d our friends at diageo are helping hospitality industry employees get back to work from home too with a social initiative called "tips from home." each week, we are inviting a homebound bartender to craft a drink using ingredients you probably have in your pantry. and now, it's time belly up to the kitchen counter for tonight's cocktail de la casa, featuring smirnoff vodka. ♪ >> hi, everyone. i am a bartender here in seattle. i'm going to use this jam to make a delicious cocktail called pump up the jam. three quarter ounce of freshly squeezedemon sew bean juice. an ounce and a half of smirnoff vodka, add ice and we're going to shake. slowly add in soda water all the way to the top there. take some of your lemon peel. add a nice garnish, and there you have it, cheers, jimmy. >> jimmy: cheers, anu. to learn more about how to give back to your bartenders, visit givz.com/tipsfromhome. i'd like to thank chris hemsworth. i'd like to apologize to matt damon. join us tomorrow with arnold schw

thank you. ♪ "jimmy kimmel live," from his house!jimmy kimmel live" from his house. we have a modern family-filled show for you tonight, including a game of modern family feud. i'll be back here tomorrow night with don cheadle, regina hall and music from phoebe bridgers in her bathroom. but first, our guests of honor. tonight, the decade-plus run of one of the funniest and most-decorated shows of the century came to an end. the family we love is assembled for one final farewell. please welcome, from "modern family," ed o'neill, sofia vergara, julie bowen, ty burrell, jesse tyler ferguson and eric stonestreet. hello, everybody, and thank you for doing this. >> hello, hello. >> hi! >> jimmy: i know this is the modern family show, but it looks more like the "brady bunch" right now. i think that makes me alice. i will start with ed, the patriarch of your television family. ed, will you ever speak to any of these people again? >> probably not. [ laughter ] >> promise? >> but we have a group text that we use. i struggle through it, but. >>

two scoops of delicious. >> jimmy: welcome back to "jimmy kimmel live" from my house. tomorrow night seth rogen will be with us. tonight, a man of multiple talents, he's been on tv since before he was born, season three of his great show "ozark" is on netflix now, say hello to jason bateman. hi, jason. >> are we doing this right now? or is this just a rehearsal? let's just rehearse one and do it for real, because i got to get in wardrobe, get the makeup done. >> jimmy: i'm enjoying your hair. it's really taken full command of your head. >> please don't. first shower in four weeks. >> jimmy: you're usually a very hygienic person, yes? >> i am. so i haven't, this hasn't been super uncomfortable for me, as far as the extra steps one needs to go to, to comply with, you know, the hygiene request, the hand washing and the sprinting from somebody about to sneeze. you' i've got all those moves down. >> jimmy: do you have a hand washing ritual you can share with us. >> quewell, 20 seconds is not a hard one for me. the big one, and i learned this from mr. leonardo dicaprio in th

find great offers and value, today, at xfinity.com ♪ >> jimmy: welcome back to jimmy kimp kimmel liveoebe bridger will perform from her bathroom. and some easter pranks you can pull on your family. join us next week. we will be back at our regular time of 11:35 with shows featuring george stephanopoulos and jack black. we have business to attend to. where's your wife? >> guillermo: she's busy. doing the cleaning. >> jimmy: what is she cleaning? i thought she was in the shower? >> guillermo: me too. i thought shy we was in the sho. she's cleaning everything. >> jimmy: she can't come just for a moment? i guess then she doesn't get to vote on this. you want to cut your hair, right? you want to shave your >> guillermo: i was wanting to do that. >> jimmy: the two of us will vote on it. it's two against one, right? >> guillermo: yeah, that's right. >> jimmy: did you say you don't have the equipment? you do have trimmers, right? a trimmer? >> guillermo: i do have, yeah, shave my beard and everything. >> jimmy: use the trimmer. get it down to the one setting. and then you finish with the razo

. ♪ ba, da, ba, ba, da, ba, da, ba, da, "jimmy kimmel live," this is ridiculous.rom his house. >> jimmy: hello again. it's jimmy, again. in my house, again. this is day 43. i think. i'm not sure. guillermo, what day is this? how long have we been in quarantine now? >> guillermo: i think 41 days. >> jimmy: all i know, this is officially the longest i've stayed inside since the womb. how depressing to be a senior, you don't get to graduate or do all the fun stuff. there's a new thing they're doing called "isolation proms" where all the kids get dressed up and dance over video chat. which is ok i guess. i guess it's better than nothing. when i was in high school, i had an "isolation prom" too. everyone else went to the prom. i stayed home and played my clarinet. and while we may be isolated, it would seem we are not alone. as if we didn't have enough to worry about right in the middle of this, at the moment we are totally focused on the virus and quarantine and whether or not we should be mainlining lysol, the pentagon releases official video of ufos. that's right. w

>> jimmy: welcome back to "jimmy kimmel live" from my house.uick note, tomorrow night in primetime, i am hosting a new episode of "who wants to be a millionaire" featuring anthony anderson and jane fonda playing for their favorite charities. watch that at 10/9 central here on abc. on this show tomorrow, i will be chatting with the mighty thor chris hemsworth all the way from the land down under. and on thursday, my guests will be arnold schwarzenegger and ed norton. the terminator and the hulk. our guest tonight is a super-talented super hero, who by day helps run his family charitable foundation, the brothers trust. he is social distancing all the way from a place called england. please say hello to tom holland. hi, tom. >> hey, how you doin', jimmy. nice to see you, mate. >> jimmy: thanks for doing this. tell us about your living situation right now. >> i am in london, i'm living with all my pals. normally when we do your show we do a live audience. we couldn't obviously have a live audience now online. i actually have my own live audience. [

. ♪ ♪ >> dicky: abc's "jimmy kimmel live." brought to you by allstate. it's the next one. always drive this slow? how did you make someone i love? that must be why you're always so late. i do not speed. and that's saving me cash with drivewise. my son, he did say that you were the safe option. and that's the nicest thing you ever said to me. so get allstate. stop bossing. where good drivers save 40% for avoiding mayhem, like me. this is my son's favorite color, you should try it. [mayhem] you always drive like an old lady? [tina] you're an old lady. step up. prep up. up. prep up. to help keep you free from the risk of hiv. from the makers of truvada, there's another prep option: descovy for prep. a once-daily prescription medicine that helps lower the chances of getting hiv through sex. it's not for everyone. descovy for prep has not been studied in people assigned female at birth. talk to your doctor to find out if it's right for you. step up. for health and body. prep up for your one and only love or many loves. for kings, this queen, and you royals in between. for my no

>> dicky: abc's "jimmy kimmel live," brought to you by jim beam. allstate. it's the next one. always drive this slow? how did you make someone i love? that must be why you're always so late. i do not speed. and that's saving me cash with drivewise. my son, he did say that you were the safe option. and that's the nicest thing you ever said to me. so get allstate. stop bossing. where good drivers save 40% for avoiding mayhem, like me. this is my son's favorite color, you should try it. [mayhem] you always drive like an old lady? [tina] you're an old lady. until i found out what itst it actually was.ed me. dust mite droppings! eeeeeww! dead skin cells! gross! so now, i grab my swiffer sweeper and heavy-duty dusters. duster extends to three feet to get all that gross stuff gotcha! and for that nasty dust on my floors, my sweeper's on it. the textured cloths grab and hold dirt and hair no matter where dust bunnies hide. no more heebie jeebies. phew. glad i stopped cleaning and started swiffering. i do motivational speakingld. in addition to the substitute teaching. i honestly feel

start here at 2020census.gov ♪ >> jimmy: welcome back to "jimmy kimmel live" from my house.e, tomorrow night in primetime here on abc, i am hosting a new episode of "who wants to be a millionaire" on its new night and time, thursdays at 8/7 central. later on, i will play a round of "millionaire" with my kids. but first, a gentleman who is a contestant on "millionaire" tomorrow night. you can watch the season finale of his great show "black-ish" next tuesday night. please welcome anthony anderson. hello, anthony. >> hey, what's going on, jimmy? >> jimmy: you're very scruffy. you've got almost a mr. t-length beard going there, huh? >> it's growing, and i'm wearing my swashbuckler shirt, we're reenacting scenes from our favorite movie. i'm black beard in "pirates of the caribbean". >> jimmy: is that what you're doing? >> that's what i'm doing, baby. coming to a screen near you. this is my creative mind working at home. >> jimmy: who are the other characters? >> it's all just castaways. it's all about me, really. >> jimmy: who's with you right now? who's in the house? >> my wife

. >> around schwarzeneggar on jimmy kimmel. we appreciate yo ♪ ba, da, ba, da bar, ba, da,da, ba,ba ♪ ♪ jimmy kimmel live ♪ this is ridiculous. from his house! >> jimmy: hello. i'm jimmy kimmel. i'm the host of this house. the reason i look like a my little pony is that today, in case you aren't aware, was supposed to be take your kid to work day, which is kind of every day for a lot of us now. they were originally planning to rename it "take your kids to the breakfast nook for a zoom meeting with no pants on day" for this year only, but decided to leave it alone. so, my daughter jane did my makeup tonight. are you going to do it? >> eye shadow. >> jimmy: eye shadow,

i am cohosting it with jimmy kimmel and stephen colbert.'m very excited a lot of big names and then she has a little surprise coming up later in the show that should be very fun also my other guest is andy cohen, who we love, from "watch what happens live." he's doing it from home as well and he's recovering at home. he got coronavirus probably three weeks ago and he's going to tell us about what he went through and how he's feeling and his charity is bethanyscause.org, bethenny frankel's charity, which is doing amazing stuff for disaster relief. she's doing some cool, some cool, cool stuff and then we're going to finish the show with billie joe armstrong from green day doing a cover of tommy james and the shondells with "i think we're alone now. it's going to be a great show. but first here's the monologue ♪k ur of being in quarantine. that's right, i've spent four chores, and teaching my own kids i feel i'm one solid beard away from being amish well, earlier tonight abc aired two hours of family feud i got to be honest, after four weeks i

here's a look at tonight on jimmy kimmel live. that liberty mutual customizes your insurance, i just love hitting the open road and telling people so you only pay for what you need! [squawks] only pay for what you need. ♪ liberty. liberty. liberty. liberty. ♪ however, there is one thing you can be certain of. the men and women of the united states postal service. we're here to deliver cards and packages from loved ones and also deliver the peace of mind

with us, goodnight, america, jimmy kimmel's next. ♪ ba, da, ba, da,da,da,da, "jimmy kimmel live"!om his house! >> jimmy: hello and welcome to my house "quarantanamo bay." if you're seeing this message, please send help. i have been trapped here for i don't know how many days, but it's important to stay positive. and there are some good things about this. for instance, i haven't had to wear a bra in weeks. every day i wake up convinced i have the virus. every morning, i'm 100% convinced. same with my wife. for weeks this has been going on. at 7:00 a.m., we are convinced we're infected, and by noon we've completely forgotten about it every day. it's like diseased groundhog's day is anyone else doing this? they say the symptoms of covis include being exhausted and aching all over, but those are also the symptoms of having children. everyone is going a little nuts right now. one of our writers ponytail jesse found himself lysoling his lysol. if you disinfect a disinfectant does it become an infectant? we are on lockdown here in los angeles. the beaches are closed, the parks are closed

the event's going to be hosted by jimmy fallon, stephen colbert, and jimmy kimmel. the pre-show starts tomorrow at 2:00 p.m. eastern on nbc news now and watch the special broadcast at 8:00 p.m. eastern on all the networks of nbc news. "the 11th hour" with brian williams begins now. >>> a rainy night in an empty times square. no tourists, nothing to look at. these are hunkering-down times in new york and elsewhere. well, good evening on this day 1,184 of the trump administration, which means effective tonight, there are now 200 days remaining until the

jimmy kimmel john crow. many have trained for yes' to get here every test every point every 2nd counts so you must focus on the prize is a career as an elite soldier and british passports for the whole family but they have to be willing to fight and even die for the u.k. . so garner deployed whom dinah bunny to baghdad for connor has. only the brightest in strongest will be selected. for the others it will be the crushing in of a mind flung dream best of a dinner party so work among. it's easier to get into harvard university then to join the british corkers more than $12000.00 boys applied this year and the army is

i have a new e-mail, kimmel @gmail.com.wer some on the show, that is how desperate i am for human contact. i'll be back tomorrow with jason bateman. "nightline" is next, thanks for watching. i miss you already.

my kimmel live" starts right now. right now. stay safe, goodnight, america aa ♪ ba, da, ba, ba, da, ba, ba, da, ba, ♪ ♪ jimmy kimmel live this is ridiculous. from his house. >> jimmy: not a green screen. hi, i'm jimmy. i'm the host of the show. may i ask what you're doing in my house? i hope everybody's doing all right. here in los angeles, i have to say, there have been a lot of positives about staying at home. the air pollution is gone. no traffic, and crime is down to almost nothing. there's never been a worse time to be an amazon package thief. i've had to stop stealing them myself. it is kind of funny crime is down at the same time everyone's dressed like they're about to rob a stage coach. and there's never been a time to have a high-speed car chase. if o.j. was on the run right now, he and a.c. would have made it to guatemala. tomorrow is formal friday, where you dress up for no good reason, and tonight is special, too. let's go to guillermo now. tell us what tonight is. >> guillermo: tonight is thirsty thur

jimmy kimmel goes one-on-one jimmy kimmel goes one-on-one with regis himself.ople are surprising themselves the moment they realize they can du more with less asthma. thanks to dupixent, the add-on treatment for specific types of moderate-to-severe asthma. dupixent isn't for sudden breathing problems. it can improve lung function for better breathing in as little as 2 weeks and help prevent severe asthma attacks. it's not a steroid but can help reduce or eliminate oral steroids. don't use if allergic to dupixent. serious allergic reactions can occur, te yctor right away about signs of inflamed blood vessels, such as rash, shortness of breath, chest pain, tingling or numbness in your limbs. tell your doctor if you have a parasitic infection thma medicines, including oral steroids. talk to your doctor about dupixent. du more with less asthma t. edward jones is well aware of that. which is why we're ready to listen. and ready to help you find opportunity. so. let's talk. edward jones. it's time for investing to feel individual. and the clock could be ticking towar

♪ you can ring my bell >>> one-on-one with jimmy kimmel.ne. can you get all the questions right? play along with us as we say -- >> good morning, america. ♪ you can ring my bell ♪ ring my bell >>> good morning, america. looked like george was getting help from his daughter elliott there. "who wants to be a millionaire?" we're glad you're with us. mother's day is just over a week away. tory johnson has great "deals & steals" for moms and these moms are excited for big bargains and they'll join us later, robin. >> oh, we look forward to that and we have another great recipe from a small restaurant. >>> this morning, we're heading to old time barbecue in raleigh, north carolina. they're going to show us how to make their famous brunswick stew, amy. >> yum. speaking of barbecue we have some big news about yesterday's restaurant, southern q barbecue in houston. by the end of the day they had hundreds of orders for their barbecue sauce and seasoning from all over the country. here's some perspective for you. they normally get two to three orders

. ♪ jimmy kimmel live >> from his house!me back to jimmy kimmel live from his house. welcome to my escape room. still trying to figure out the escape part. tonight on the show a young man who is making his television debut from his bathroom, sam fischer. we're also going to salute an icu nurse from boston who is out in the field fighting the coronavirus right now. and then later, the kids, or rather, the young adults, from "modern family" compete against each other in a scavenger hunt from their homes. the series finale modern family is tomorrow night. make sure to join us after that with the adults from "modern family." and also tomorrow an all new season of "who wants to be a millionaire" hosted by me! so please check that out. my guest tonight is equal parts national treasure, talk-show host, and fish. she joins us from her very well-appointed home, please welcome ellen degeneres. hello, ellen. ellen, may i ask a question? and first of all, there is nothing scarier than andy lurking behind you in that mask. it looks like

sleeping on the couch. >>> thank you soft for j ♪ pa-da-pa, pa-da-pa, pa, , , , pa-da-pa ♪ ♪ jimmy kimmel>> from his house! >> jimmy: hi, i'm jimmy. welcome to my home. hard to believe it's already halloween, isn't it? i hope you had a good weekend. let me guess, you baked bread and watched the michael jordan documentary? i'm actually feeling great today. this morning i woke up, i rolled up my sleeves, i injected a big syringe of formula 409 into my arm and i am now coronavirus-free. the tide pods appear to be turning against president wackadoodle. dr. donald jingleheimer trump spent the weekend trying to pretend he wasn't really suggesting that maybe we should inct

it's jimmy kimmel. welcome to the show. welcome to my house.s a kid, i used to pretend i was hosting a talk show in my kitchen, and finally, that dream has come true. not as glamorous as i'd imagined it would be. happy pranksgiving. today is, or was, april fools' day. just kidding! april fools'. it's still march, it'll be march forever. this is the one year where getting your house toilet-papered would be welcomed. warmly. but it didn't happen to me. i didn't know if people would be in the mood for pranks today because this year has so far been a series of them, but it turns out, they were. at least the prankers were. i can't speak for the prankees, but there were some very clever ideas floating around, and some twists on those ideas too, like this one involving a hoodie and a refrigerator. ♪

for kimmel, colbert, and fallon, the show must go on. >> are we rolling? we're rolling right now?: they're rolling, all right. the late-night shows look pretty different these days. >> hello, i'm jimmy and welcome to my house. i'm in mine, you're in yours. making do with the crew they've got. >> my name is jimmy fallon, this is franny fallon, this is winnie fallon, and my wife is the camera operator. >> reporter: colbert changing the name of his show from "the late show" to "a late show" to mark the change. jimmy's opening credits drawings from his kids. but their monologue still tackling the news of the day. >> there's word now that students who are applying for college may take the s.a.t. and a.c.t. tests from home this year. which, boy, if only felicity huffman had waited. >> reporter: some going very low-tech. fallon reading his monologue from a piece of paper. >> so the state of new jersey's holding a benefit show called "jersey for jersey." it's the only benefit show where the host threatens you with a baseball bat. >> reporter: instead of interviewing guests in person, they

. >> what's coming up tonight on jimmy kimmel live. there are times when our need to connect really matters. to keep customers and employees in the know. to keep business moving. comcast business is prepared for times like these. powered by the nation's largest gig-speed network. to help give you the speed, reliability, and security you need. tools to manage your business from any device, anywhere. and a team of experts - here for you 24/7. we've always believed in the power of working together. that's why, when every connection counts... you can count on us. that could mean an increase byin energy bills.. you can save by setting your heat to 68 or lower... unplugging and turning off devices when not in use... or just letting the sun light your home. stay well and keep it golden. >>> for the first time gig workers independent contractors and those self-employed can qualify for unemployment without paying into the system. this change which became effective today will end weeks of frustration for those who benefits had now been rejected.